#let the tumblr people show me what they think the funny men look like

[yaboijakie]

it just occurred to me that in the final season of rvb they might do their canon face reveals and i so fucking desperately need this to not happen

[neroushalvaus]

Tumblr in the 60s – deleted posts

Some people requested a sequel to this post so I thought I'd post these drafts that didn't make it to the original. Maybe doing more at some point if the inspiration hits me but I hope these bring you some joy.

🚀 starrfleet Follow

HEY GUYS!! We're buying The Beatles so John and Paul can finally get together!! Who's in

🎹 nixonsafascist Follow

Call that... Beatles for Sale

🚀 starrfleet Follow

Dude this is serious. We want to free them. Why is homophobia so very funny to you?

🎶 mclennstarrison Follow

Didn't The Beatles start managing themselves after Mr Epstein died? So you plan to buy them... From themselves?

🚀 starrfleet Follow

Oh so the george harrison vampire mpreg blog is going to preach to us now.

92 notes

📻 lesbianbobdylan Follow

"Let men have short hair!!" "It's okay to not agree with the civil rights folk" "Don't let tumblr tell you that serving your country is bad" You are all so chronically online and convinced your little hippie bubble represents the world that you have the worst takes. Conservatism is alive and well, us hippies are the fucking minority. The outside world is perfectly okay with all the anti-mlk short-haired men who are happily getting drafted. You are not counterculture.

15,5 t. notes

☁️ ankin-vaimo Follow

Tumblr is so US/UK centric. Scrolling through this site you'd think there were no other tv shows than star trek and no other bands than the monkees and that the stonewall riots were the only meaningful political activism that has ever happened. There's so much great culture elsewhere. I bet you have never even heard of Tapani Kansa.

🇻🇳 shirellesofficial

#shhh don't tell Tumblr that other countries exist #they couldn't even admit Please Mr. Postman was originated by black women (tags via @marvelettesofficial)

peer reviewed tags

#sorry for going through your tumblr marvelettesofficial #you're just so funny #hope i'm not annoying you

54 notes

🌼 andpeoplesaywebeatlearound Follow

People really like to pretend us Beatles girlies hate Y*ko for being asian and a woman like she didn't literally make John cheat on his wife and leave his young son

🪕 prostitutesandlesbians Follow

don't talk like us beatles girlies are all the same, i personally want to fuck her on a canvas while we're both covered in menstrual blood, creating modern art by making love

✝️ jesusrevolution Follow

Op is this you? ↓

🎶 mclennstarrison Follow

Also like, "made John cheat on his wife and leave his young son", did John himself have nothing to do with that decision or..?

🪕 prostitutesandlesbians Follow

do you guys think she and john do mommy play

🎶 mclennstarrison Follow

I appreciate the input @prostitutesandlesbians but we're trying to call the op out for being a racist misogynist

🪕 prostitutesandlesbians Follow

sorry

346 notes

🤪 thekinkykinks Follow

Why is there even discourse about this... Yeah, the folks at Stonewall could have been more respectful towards the police officers who were just doing their jobs, but why are we acting like throwing some pennies at the police officers and calling them "Lily Law" is the worst type of oppression

🥿 trustnobutch Follow

You know what? No. Fuck you. I'm tired of you all talking about these people like they were your poor little meow meows. Have you read about this at all? The raid did not happen because the police "hates gay people wah wah". Stonewall Inn was run by the mob. The. Fucking. Mob. Would you rather have the police not protecting us from criminals, huh??? And the rioters were nothing but a bunch of attention seekers. I heard that a guy from the fucking Mattachine Society phoned newspapers and took pictures of the riot. I'm so disappointed, that was the only gay group that seemed to care about looking respectable in the eyes of the heterosexuals. People who were there made us all look bad and set our movement back like 50 years. Fuck you for supporting them.

🍊 kissmemissoklaholma Follow

Yeah. I heard someone threw a brick.

✌ draftdodgerdyke

??? Nobody threw bricks, where the fuck do you get your information ??

#they should have tho #chilling at the stockholm airport finding the weirdest takes

998 notes

🧸 teddyboyfemme Follow

i'm sharing a joint with this cute ass butch with the cutest curliest hair ever guyyyyssss I think i'm falling in love

🧸 teddyboyfemme Follow

she plays the harmonica for me i want to fuck her to the mattress

🧸 teddyboyfemme Follow

i don't have any idea what she's singing about but i think she likes the rolling stones too, we have so much in commonnnn

🧸 teddyboyfemme Follow

So it turns out that was Bob Dylan.

70,9 t. notes

[dtmsrpfcringe]

We don't hate women. We hate women who are abusive towards their partners.

Michael and David both deserve better and just because you want to buy into what PR and social media tells you, you don't have to attack other people for being upset over actors they care about possibly not being happy.

David wouldn't leave Georgia, they are married and have children, so he feels responsible. He always puts other people before himself. And Anna played it well with the babies, as harsh as it sounds. Michael would feel terrible leaving the girls. People staying in relationships doesn't prove you right, sadly. It's no sign of anything other than commitment and commitment doesn't always come from a place of love.

By saying that Michael and David shippers want to see them unhappy in their relationship, you show that you're missing the point. The whole point of shipping them is wanting them to be happy. You just want to be hateful towards people who don't suppprt your narrative, it seems.

GOD I WISH TUMBLR WOULD LET ME ADD TEXTS BEFORE ASKS SO I COULD SAY “Warning: you’re about to hear one of the most moronic takes I have ever heard” *insert gif of amanojaku from ghost stories here* okay let’s…we have to break this down it’s too much for me to just laugh at and go “wow this is dumb as hell”

“We don’t hate women, we just make up stuff so we can justify hating them”- you. where’s…where’s any shred of proof that either women are even a little bit abusive? I mean don’t you think we would have seen some of that by now? And no, enty lawyer doesn’t count as proof and neither does random screenshots of a bit of text with zero context. Also neither do jokes online with your partner when they’re okay with it (and make the same jokes quite literally all the time) and nobody sees a problem with it except the people that conveniently hate these women.

2. “Michael and David both deserve better” yes I’m sure the rich white middle aged men who are two of the most popular actors in their countries who have girlfriends/wives and kids who love and adore them are surely hurting because some weirdo on tumblr says it.

3. Hate to tell you this but married people with children divorce all the time. It’s not like if they divorce he is going to suddenly vanish in a puff of smoke babe.

4. Even if that’s true, your theory of him only staying out of responsibility is bullshit. Someone who stays for the kids isn’t going to dip their wife into a kiss on the red carpet and look at her like a hozier song sounds. If there’s any event or interview where he can find a way to praise Georgia, he does it. He always talks about her. After events they’ve been seen kissing deeply and walking arm in arm honeymoon style.

5. as for Anna and Michael, (David and Georgia too but they seem more open to pda) they don’t owe you pda. Michael has been more than adamant about defending his girlfriend on twitter and good for him about it.

6. if you guys were genuinely concerned with Michael and David’s impending relationship crashes, why is it always tied to their love for one another? The only people who see This rampant “abuse and unhappiness” is this group of people who believe David and Michael are actually in love and want to elope together. Nobody else. Not even other Sheenant shippers. You guys literally just hate them, I mean Invisibleicewands has been talking shit on Anna since she posted her first photo with Michael back in 2019 and hasn’t stopped.

7. “And Anna played it well with the babies, as harsh as it sounds.” seriously what the absolute crap is this supposed to mean my dude? I’ve gotta be honest….you know how smex works right? Michael could absolutely choose to use protection!!! Why is it on her? Not on him. He’s had kids before I think he knows that a stork doesn’t bring the baby. Holy hell you people make my eyes hurt

8. (finally) funny you should bring up narratives, you know considering you’re part of the group that thinks any affection towards anybody else that isn’t them is PR (thinking of the Joseph Fiennes hug fiasco) that lied about Georgia and Anna being abusive, that has tried time and time again and moved the goalpost, that fabricates evidence and tries to send death threats to people who speak out, and then lie about it, that your group is the one who can’t handle women working together and have to call everything PR. The same group that ignores the fact that Anna and Georgia are friends, to talk grave shit on them. Newsflash sweetheart, we aren’t the ones pushing the narrative here. You only want to see David and Michael happy as long as it aligns with your delusion. Have the day you deserve.

anyways, I think this is going to be my pinned post. Mostly because I want this to be embarrassing if you ever try to come back here and lie on Betty whites internet again, but also because I think this addresses so many tin hat talking points at once. Just because we love aziraphale and crowley doesn't mean we get the right to insert ourselves into their personal lives, you wouldn't want someone else praying for your relationship to fail.

[sharp-rosee]

Hey funny story: I haven't been around Tumblr at all for months, but today someone told me menalez had deactivated or something so I came on here and looked it up. First result was a post by you, i checked out your blog and wouldn't you know it your most recent post had you defending me post mortem lmfao. I sent an anon to the other woman too but it seems she won't post it so to clarify to you: when I supposedly said "studies showing violence suffered by bisexuals are cringe and useless" what I remember thinking about that is that those studies that I've seen are never used to try to understand why bisexuals suffer such insane rates of violence (more than homosexuals) and trying to stop it. I've only seen them be used as battering rams in discourse when homosexuals criticize bisexuals. Which is crazy for such a serious issue and totally trivializes it lol. Also that my explanation for it was that such studies show that many abused people incorrectly id as bi for a time. You can disagree or wtv just those were my points, she made it sound like I'm cheering on women beating if they're bi or something. Also your defense of me (thanks queen lol) is accurate if you were wondering. I used to be sorta pro strict separatism but I outgrew the anger/ denial phase of "most women will partner with men" and reached acceptance. Most people are built for romantic partnership, that's just human nature, I can't be hating het women just because their lot in life in that means they're more likely to be abused. Just because I'm not drawn to men, or even much to romance, doesn't mean I should act like that's everyone else too and judge them on that standard, I accept reality and want women to be safe within that rather than pointlessly hate on them and get all worked up because some women have boyfriends..

Well I'm also a mean asshole, I'm sure you noticed, and I definitely would give the bi girlies on radblr a hard time here at the time lol. I don't have the "one side" sort of takes on this divide on radblr. It was funny but I can't feel the energy to that anymore since leaving tumblr, way too few bis or gays irl to care about that stuff. But at the end of the day these are my actual takes on all that disk horse. Funny to see it immediately on such a causal stroll around here lol

-sleep3r4gent

QUEEN I used to follow you ♡ at least when I was crypto a few years back I did.

Also, I'm glad you clarified because the way some women on here seem to hallucinate things they read almost makes me feel insane as well. Like you sending an ask saying you never thought of a certain perspective is not indicative of you agreeing and obviously one can change their opinions over time.

I really have no opinion either way tbh, I myself am straight and in a relationship, and have had others on my last blog send some anons calling me a "dick worshipper" and other misogynistic BS, but they stopped once I didn't let it bother me much. It's so obviously a group of trolls that it's embarrassing that they still believe it enough to keep bringing back the same users, some like you who aren't even misogynistic, to further their persecution complex.

It even is more annoying because these are the women who made Mena/Moideater leave, the above drama is a big reason why. The way radblr will still reblog posts from very racist blogs and not bat an eye but then freak out over a clique of women who aren't even radfems really does show what demographic makes up this site.

I know it gets exhausting to be involved in arguments, but it's nice to know you're still somewhat around. I hope you, Mena and Moid come back someday. If not I understand. But I'll never forget any of them and I haven't forgotten you 😭😭😭

[crowleysgirl56]

Wildest dreams wishes for Good Omens Season 3 which will probably not come true but I can still hope hey!

Number 17.

Sex! That’s right we’re going there. Because my latest random post got a lot of differing opinions (which was really just for shits and giggles. Nothing I say should be taken seriously 😜) I thought I’d address what my actual prediction and also wildest hope for season 3 is.

I think what we will get is an implied sex scene. For a number of reasons.

1. The tone of the show is not explicit. Even though you can definitely point to other Amazon Prime shows that will go there (exhibit A: American Gods), I don’t think we would get that for Good Omens.

2. It’s a comedy. So if anything we would get something that is almost silly. Probably to parallel the ridiculous and funny sex scene between Anathema and Newt in season 1 (think of them under the bed popping in and out of frame as papers fly everywhere). I don’t think the S3 scene would be specifically played for laughs, because this is the type of show that is very respectful of a same sex relationship. We’ve had way too many horrible experiences for decades of television programs playing up “men having sex = stupid/silly/funny/not serious/etc”. Neil would not let something like this happen (Exhibit B: American Gods, again). So I would suggest the situation leading up to the act would probably be ridiculous or something we can laugh at, but the act itself would not.

3. Neil reblogged a post a few months ago and annoyingly I can’t find it. But it had something to do with same sex coupling in media and how important it is, and he basically said something along the lines of “I don’t write these kinds of scenes but now I wish I did”. I think he was possible responding to someone saying “Neil wouldn’t do something like that”. That’s a pretty interesting thought and a very pointed comment to make at a time when he had either just started writing season 3, or right before it. Or at least that’s when I saw the post. This is Tumblr so for all I know it could have been posted 2 years ago (seriously, how does Tumblr work? I’ve only been here 6 months!).

So what do I think will ACTUALLY happen? I think we’ll get Crowley and Aziraphale passionately kiss, get to Aziraphale’s bedroom and then fall onto the bed out of shot. If we’re lucky we might get close up shots of hands intertwining, more kissing, some removal of clothing perhaps. Then the scene would shift outside to Whickber street. People will probably noticing a trembling in the ground. Maybe in Give Me Coffee or Give Me Death we see tea and coffee cups rattling on the table and Nina looking confused and concerned. Then a brilliant white light pours out of the upper floor window of the book shop. Cut back to Aziraphale and Crowley holding each other and panting, but it’s a tasteful shoulders up shot.

Subtle, implied, still pretty hot.

So in the mean time, if you want something explicit, to AO3 my fellow Smutgoblins!

[armands-cuck-chair]

"'Exceptional negro.' 'Thank you, sir.' It was the call and response of my entire life. I had let them talk to me like that so long I stopped hearing it. 'Yes sir', 'of course, sir', 'subject, verb, agreement, sir', smile, nod, 'yes, sir.' They all came from the same organ inside me, an organ unknown to science at the time, because what scientist would look for an organ found only in black men who use their weakness to rise? But I wasn't a man anymore. I was something else. I had powers now, and decades of rage to process, and it was both random and unfortunate the man picked that night to dabble in fuckery."

One of my favorite Louis quotes of all time. And it makes me so happy when I'm watching black reactors watch this scene because it's obviously so cathartic for them. I like watching black reaction content for this show in particular, because it helps me as a white person appreciate the show on a whole other level that I would be incapable of on my own. It was actually a black acter that made me interested in watching the show in the first place!

I had seen gifs on tumblr and I wanted to get a feel for the show before I bought it. I was a fan of the 1994 movie and had read some of the book, but it did always bother me that Louis in both of those versions of the story was a slave owner. And especially in the movie, which adds that whole gross slave master/enslaved black woman romance racist trope that always made me uncomfortable, even before I could articulate why. (At least the slaves get freed and then they burn down the plantation? Seriously, don't get me started on that aspect of the 1994 movie.) I was really intrigued by the fact that the show chose to make Louis a black creole man, instead of a white creole man, and also the switching of the time period. But because some aspects of the source material were...not great, I was worried that that change might not have been handled the best. Vampire media oftentimes don't treat their black characters very well. So when I decided to watch reaction content of it to get a feel for the show, I wanted to hear a black perspective on it.

So I watched ShalayaHomebody TV's reaction first (also her Sandman reactions are so good, she is so funny, you should absolutely subscribe), and I was pleasantly surprised because, you know, the bar is in Hell. I immediately bought the first season and I have been obsessed with the show and have had The Vampire Chronicles brainrot ever since.

A while ago, I watched Syntell's reactions with Mikel Claire on his channel and I was sort of blown away by him saying this about the scene when Sam takes Louis's tickets to the Theatre des Vampires show in the fake fangs and white vampire makeup: "I wonder if that's like blackface to them?" Like, as a white person, my mind just straight up didn't go there, but as soon as he said it I totally got it. It made me think of how Josephine Baker had performed in blackface as a black woman, because she could get more money performing to white audiences and that's the only way white audiences at the time would watch anything having to do with black people. It made me look at the whole Theatre des Vampires differently.

After Claudia proclaimed that the trial was a stoning, Alex of Jessa and Alex Watch said: "No, it's a lynching!" And...yeah! It basically was.

I could keep giving examples, but I'm stoned and rambling and this post is already going to be incredibly long as it is. I just have a lot to say!

The show might not handle every single thing exactly right 100% of the time in regards to race, nothing does, but I really appreciate the show taking pains to accurately cover the typical attitudes regarding race in the time periods it's set in, including the present. That's not to say that any scrutiny or criticism isn't warranted, there will always be blind spots. And like I said, the bar is in Hell, but I think it's really cool and good that they took the time to sit back and say, "okay, how does changing this character's race change their history and how they navigate the world?" Especially when there are white supremacists in the US government who think teaching about the history and the structural nature of racism not be taught because it will "make white kids grow up hating themselves". 🙄

I don't know, man. I just saw people criticizing some of the Devil's Minion fandom for their treatment of Louis when I was browsing the tag and like...I don't want to contribute to making black fans of the show feel shut out and like they don't have a space in the fandom. It's like that meme: "I got so caught up in the euphoria of shipping Devil's Minion that for a moment I forgot racism exists."

I don't say it enough, but I love this incarnation of Louis and Claudia. I love that there are so many black fans who feel seen and represented. I love that the show isn't just a sea of 99% white characters like the books are, but keeping everything that makes the books compelling and great and then elevating it by making it more inclusive.

Don't sideline the black fans in the IWTV community. Watch black reacters. Engage with them. Listen to them. You might not agree with every take they have, but I promise you that it will make you enjoy the show from a whole new perspective.

[yourmisogynistfriend]

✨The story behind my blog name✨

Come sit on my lap, sweetie, and let me tell you why I decided to call myself yourmisogynistfriend

Well first it’s because the old name was due to be changed. My previous name was truegirlssftagain. This name originated of my first blog I created at 17, which was named onlytruegirls (yes, I know I was underage when I created this blog, thanks for noticing). I only reblogged pics of hot girls in bikinis or naked. The name was because I wanted to show what true girls were supposed to look like. This was obviously a very restricted point of view, but I was young. Anyway, this concept of « true girl » sticked with me over the years. But at one point I realized it was a little bit cringe and dumb for a blog name. I always tried to not appear as a tumblr dom and this blog name clearly didn’t helped.

So I have been thinking about what my new name could be. I always thought the fact I post very misogynist stuff while being a huge feminist was pretty ironic. Yes, I am feminist. I believe in gender equality, I believe women are equal to men, I get mad every time something happens in the world against women. Anyway, I’m not here to convince you about how feminist I am. But I once remembered an event that happened to me and I thought it was pretty funny.

During a class in uni, we had an activity about history of feminism, the group was split in two based on our last names and my part of the group was made of four women out of 20 people. To talk about feminism… See how ironic this is? Let me tell you that the women of my group, who are personal friends, were not feeling very comfortable to talk among a group of men. Well after the activity, my girl friends told me I was the only man in the group they trusted to not make misogynist comments (and some others really said some borderline stuff). I was the only man they wanted to hear give his opinion on the subject. What came to my mind at this moment is « good thing they don’t know about my tumblr blog! ».

So, let’s get back to when I decided to choose a new blog name. I remembered that moment and was thinking: « I’m actually a real feminist, a man whose presence makes women feel safe, whose opinions about feminism are welcome by women, and yet my blog is about objectifying women ». It’s hell of a duality! I thought it was a good idea to exploit this experience I lived. So I decided the new name will be about the fact that even your feminist friends may be fantasizing about molesting you. Even the most feminist person you know may be daydreaming of legalized rape and free use in public.

I thought about calling my blog yourfeministfriend, because that’s what I am. I am a feminist friend and yet I fantasize about misogyny. But the name was already taken. I decided to call myself yourfeministbuddy, and it worked… for a week. My blog got deleted. I don’t know if it’s just a coincidence or if feminists found and mass reported me. Just in case, I didn’t take any chance and decided my new blog would be yourmisogynistfriend. This way, nobody can report me saying my blog name is a lie, even if the dual effect of my blog name and my blog content is gone.

And yes, one of my girl friends who made that comment about me, who feels safe with me, she’s hot and I’d love to make her choke on my cock and make her my little toy like she’s truly meant to be. But she’ll never know.

Sorry if it’s a long story for your silly little brain, but I think it’s worth the effort of reading it all.

[dbnightingale24]

Bad Habits

A Thomas Shelby Love Story

~~

Part 1

~~

Alright, before everyone starts yelling at me, I promise that the final part to my Ransom story is almost done. It's slightly longer than this one, and I'm being extremely picky about it cause I wasn't necessarily happy with the last one I posted. That being said, my husband and I binged all six seasons of 'Peaky Blinders' in five days, so now we have this. I'm also posting this one first because I used a different approach on this story and it's giving me extreme anxiety lol. I tried to capture the accents and the essence of the show, so I really hope you all like it! Anyway, here goes! Thank you, as always, to @fuckingbye for the amazing moodboard, I love you and will build a monument to your greatness.

Word Count: 24,549 (to those of you who are new: I'm sorry. To those who aren't: this is me being on my best behavior and you know it.)

Warnings: SMUT (MINORS DNI) , Swearing, Drinking, Drug Use, Depression, Religion, Fluff, Anxiety attacks, Cheating, Abusive Relationship, Angst (c'mon now, it's me), Family Drama, Child Trauma (if you squint)...I think that's it. It dives deeper into a lot of things in part 2.

Song(s) That Inspired This Chapter: I Only Know How To Go Too Far

I do not give consent/permission for my works/stories to be posted elsewhere. I do not condone this type of behavior, this is for entertainment purposes only.

~~

His eyes meet yours from across the room and you know you’re fucked. You should’ve stayed away. Yes, it’s your sister’s engagement party, but you knew he’d be here. The way your family loves the Shelby family...you knew. You knew he’d show up and would be looking for you. Still, you came and you know it’s because you miss him. God, you miss him like crazy.

Thomas fucking Shelby.

“Oi! Come over here, love!” Arthur calls, drunken smile on his face as he makes eye contact with you from across the hall.

“You stay away!” you laugh as he makes his way to you.

“Lets have a dance, eh?” he suggests as he finally reaches you.

“You, Arthur Shelby, shall not lay a finger on me tonight, or any other night,” you smirk, grabbing your glass and taking a swig from it.

“And why is that?”

“Tommy ‘ll kill ya,” you giggle, nodding across the room to where he’s sitting with his wife, Grace. 

“He has no say in it now, does he? He’s married.”

“As if that ever stops the Shelby men,” you tease and he flips you off.

“One dance.”

“Not tonight, Arthur. Besides, a man of your status seen with a woman like me? What will the people think?”

“Who cares? I know how I’ll feel,” he smirks and you burst out laughing.

You really have missed the Shelby men.

“What’s so funny, eh?” Thomas asks, causing you to jump cause you didn’t even notice that he had made his way over.

“Nothin’,” you giggle, feeling the burn of Grace’s glare on you, “what ya doin’ over here without your lady, Thomas?”

“Just wanted to see what ’m missin’ out on.”

“I think I’ve found someone more agreeable to my needs,” Arthur smiles as he makes eyes with a woman across the room, “if you’ll excuse me,” he nods as you start laughing again while he walks off.

“So, you’re fucking Arthur now?”

“Watch it, Thomas,” you warn, cutting your eyes at him before taking another sip of your drink.

“You used to call me Tomcat.”

“What do you want?”

“Come with me.”

“And if I don’t feel like it?”

“Come with me,” he demands in a harsher tone and contradictory smile, before starting to walk out.

You roll your eyes as you grab your glass and bottle before following him out. 

You’ve known for a while that it angers him that you don’t fear him in the slightest. You also know that it irritates him that there’s no reason for you to be scared of him; you two have been through so much and have known each other for so long...

~~

The rest is on AO3. For whatever reason, Tumblr won't let me post the whole thing on here -_-

Here's the link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/49359964

~~

taglist: @emerald-evans, @autumnrose40

[xunolic]

only time will tell pt.2 (l.sy) [cont.]

pairing: sangyeon x blackfem!reader (more race neutral) | wc: 9.4k

au(s): secret agents, exes/enemies to lovers | genre: action, angst, smut, rom-comish

summary: after a year and a half, you finally heard the name you didn't want to be mentioned again. lee sangyeon. now more than ever, however, it's a must for agents to stick together due to a list of hits from the resurgence of korea’s more dangerous syndicates.

warnings: lowercase intended. explicit language, mainly plot filled, descriptions of violence/blood, mentions of alcohol, minor character death, arguments. let me know if any was missed!

first part. (please read before this part!)

a/n: hi! again tumblr is ass so make sure you read the first part of this! i'm so sorry for the inconvenience. reblogs are highly appreciated!

you tried to keep your mind from going to the worst, but this was a bad sign. you started in his room, checking his bathroom, the closet, even the bed: nothing.

you ran to the guest bathroom: nothing.

you ran to the backyard: nothing.

you ran to every single room in that house: still nothing.

“sangyeon!” you wailed, trembling as you rechecked the kitchen. “sangyeon, if you're hiding, this isn’t fucking funny!”

that was when your phone rang. you took off to the room, picking up the phone, seeing the time was noon. it was around the time jacob should've been on his mission, but why was he calling you?

“hello?” you picked up.

“be ready. i’m almost there. no one showed up to the office except me, changmin, and jiwon. eric isn't answering his phone, and neither is sunwoo. i tried calling miyeon and hyunjae, but there was nothing. neither boss was there either, i’m not sure what to do.”

“s-sangyeon isn't here either,” you sniffed, trying to calm yourself as you sat on the bed.

“what?! y/n, just stay calm, i’ll be there soon.”

you hung up the phone, your hands shaking as you sat down the device. you slowly got up, every step feeling heavy as you questioned what was happening. where was everyone? were they okay? the thoughts alone made you sick.

when jacob arrived, you walked out of the house, gripping your phone tightly. you got in the car, turned around, and saw jiwon and changmin in the back seat. you eyed both of them sadly before turning back around. jacob looked over at you, grabbing your hand and shaking it.

“we’ll find him; we’ll find them all, i promise,” he conveyed.

you nodded, trying again to calm yourself down; you just couldn't. why’d it feel like when every time you and sangyeon were to be together, something went horribly wrong.

you were stuck in the car for hours, it felt. each of them tried their hardest to track anyone’s location but failed each time. jacob groaned, gripping his hair, staring at the screen in his car. jacob turned to changmin, a brow raised as changmin shook his head, stating he found nothing.

when jacob got to jiwon, she looked up at him, turning her screen to him. “i found this. i tried everyone’s phone, but then i remembered both bosses were gone too. i tracked youngro’s phone and saw another place outside of seoul, near the countryside.”

you turned to look at her screen and then back to jacob, “it's an hour away. what if we’re too late?”

“don’t think like that, y/n,” jacob said, starting up the car.

and that's what you tried telling yourself while you all were riding. you prayed and begged, hoping all was well, and maybe it was all a big prank. you wished it was all a dream, some sort of evil nightmare, but each time you pinched yourself, you didn't wake up.

“we need a plan,” jiwon said, looking toward the front. “i know for sure there have to be men outside. people like this will always have lookouts. so, any ideas?”

you looked at the gps, finding you had ten minutes to make one up on the spot. “i don't have any weapons, so i don't know how useful i am.”

jacob scoffed, keeping his eyes on the road, “one of the best, if not the best, combat specialists doubting her skills, ridiculous.”

“i’m sorry… i-i just…”

“cut it out. you’re so confident in what you do. why aren't you now?”

“i’m fucking scared, jacob.” it was true. for the first time in forever, you felt genuine fear. the man you love was in possible danger, and you still had no idea who was really in charge of this. it was all too much for you. you didn't know if you could do it. you were questioning yourself and couldn't stop.

“do i have to remind you who you are? i don’t think i do because you should know already. think of this like any other fight, and if you’re scared to be alone, i’ll go with you.”

“what? no, no, no, you don’t fight,” you exclaimed, shaking your hands in front of you.

“don't care, hyung is my friend too. plus eric is missing, he may be loud but i kind of miss him. when we find him, don't tell him i said that,” jacob cringed. you let out a small breath of laughter, looking up at where jacob pulled into.

the sun was setting around you as changmin halted you from getting out of the car, “what’s the plan?”

“i'm not sure. i can't make one up right now. my brain is too foggy, and i can't think,” you said, rubbing your hands on your pants.

“i got one,” jacob said, looking at all three of you.

just as jiwon presumed, two or so men were outside, guarding the door with guns as they walked back and forth in front of it, mean mugs not leaving their faces.

you hopped out of the van with jacob and nodded for him to stay back; the van was hidden further away from the actual two-story building. although there wasn’t much around to hide behind, a few dilapidated buildings were hiding you enough from the men's view. 

you took a deep breath, looking at jacob. he looked at you, nodding and mouthing that you could do it. as he saw the hesitation on your face, he smiled softly, holding his hand out for you. once you took it, he pulled you into him, rubbing your back softly to comfort you. 

“i believe in you, y/n, we all do,” jacob murmured in your ear. it was rare for you and jacob to show affection toward each other, hell this was the second time this year and probably the 10th time (might be an exaggeration) in the four to five years you’d known him, but right now, it was clear how much you needed it. you pulled away from your friend, letting out a shaky breath. “go kick some ass.”

you gave a small smile before nodding and turning back to your destination slowly inching toward another hiding spot. you stared at the men who guarded the door, planning your attack out meticulously. a thought came into your head as you glanced down and saw a large rock. you thought if the men were as stupid as the ones from the hair salon mission, this shouldn't be too bad.

you took another deep breath, quickly crawling over to the rock, glancing past what you were hiding behind, and slipping it toward you. you looked over toward the men again, watching as one of the men walked as close as you wanted him to. you squinted your eyes and chucked the rock as far as possible. 

you prayed and hoped it made it to some part of his body, and to your surprise, it hit him right on his head. he didn't yelp; he didn't make a sound as his body slumped to the ground unconscious. the other men still heard the impact of the falling rock as they made their way over with the weapons. 

one of the men bent to check his pulse, nodding that he was still alive. as he stood upright, they began to make their way over to whatever had made the noise. one walked toward where you were, while the other walked a bit further behind the building.

without jacob in your ear telling you the timing of your target, you were still feeling disheartened. you brushed it off as soon as you heard the footsteps come closer. as he peaked behind the barrier you were hiding behind, you waved at him before swiftly grabbing him and dragging him down with you.

you slapped a hand over his mouth and wrapped an arm around his throat along with your legs around this lower half to keep him down. 

“shh, don't fight it…” you whispered, the boost in confidence creeping up on you in an instant. it didn't surprise you that getting your hands on one of those men was all you needed. “yep. thats it… night night.”

you slung his body down, taking his weapon from him. you kicked his body back into the open for the last man that stood over there to see. you heard him rush faster toward you than the first one did; you thanked the heavens above that the weapon had a silencer on it. as soon as he got to you, you shot right into his calf. 

he fell with a yelp, and you took this as an opportunity. you slipped on top of his back, taking the gun, lodging the bottom of it into his mouth as you held onto the silencer bit and the handle of the weapon. you pulled his head back with the gun that was in his mouth as his hands gripped and clawed at the dirt below him. in this position it gave you easy access to apply pressure onto his numbing points so you quickly pressed on them with the hand that once held the silencer, watching him fall unconscious almost immediately. 

with a huff, you peeked again to the building, sighing in relief once you saw you’d taken the three out. you whistled a small tune and jacob took that clue to come to you as fast as he could, handing you a few things with a grin. as you took the things from him, you stood up staring at him before rolling your eyes playfully.

“don’t start.”

“what? i didn't say anything,” he responded with pursed lips. “and you thought you couldn’t do it.”

“what can i say, adrenaline hit, they have my future husband in there… and i love fighting,” you laugh softly with a shrug, as you placed the things he handed you in your pockets. “let’s go.”

“do you wanna take their guns?”

“not yet… you have a solid punch?”

“i mean not reall–"

“great, let’s go.” you knew he didn’t.

jacob scoffed from behind you, following suit as you crouch-walked towards the building.

you and jacob made your way into the front door without trouble, you both quietly began to look into the large room you both were met with. the next room you walked into had most of everyone’s faces from each company. they were either marked as safe or to be dated. it made you sick.

then the next room you walked into was filled with computers, laptops, and all sorts of devices that looked like they were jampacked with information. jacob walked over to them, sitting in the seat looking through one of the laptops. as he looked through, something caught your eye as you whispered, “jacob, look.”

“what is it?”

“the hard drive.”

jacob looked down beside the laptop, seeing the same red hard drive kevin took yesterday. “kevin had it last. how did it end up here?”

“did you see kevin this morning?”

“no, but he said he felt sick when he called me last night. he said he’d keep the hard drive with him until this morning…”

“you don’t think they have kevin, too, do you?”

“fuck, i hope not. i’ll look through this some more, go scope out the area, i’ll be right there.”

“please stay safe,” you told him, walking out of the room and toward a few other rooms. you took your time taking out the other few men that remained on the premises that were guarding some doors. there were about nine or ten of them and you hoped no more were around, jacob genuinely couldn’t fight.

once you checked out everywhere else after knocking down most of the obstacles, you made your way up the creaky stairs, trying not to make any more noise than you already were.

once you made it up, you walked down the hall, where a bright light illuminated the corridor. you snuck past the other doors, not knowing what lurked behind them, as you continued toward the vast room. 

you almost fell to your knees once you made it in. your stomach was on the floor as you kept your cries in. there he was, sitting in dead center, his hands tied behind him, his ankles tied and his mouth covered. you walked over to him, hand shaking as you rubbed his cheek. 

“yeon? fuck… fuck…” you mumbled, tears falling from your eyes. sangyeon himself couldn't keep tears out of his own eyes. “i-i’m gonna get you out okay? just… just wait okay.”

you pulled something out of your pocket that jacob had given you, leaning around sangyeon’s side, trying to get the bondage off his wrists. you were too focused, you didn't hear the other footsteps that had made their way into the room. sangyeon, with the barrier still on his mouth, tried his hardest to warn you, but you were out of luck. the nose of whoever’s gun was pointed at your skull, and you froze.

“i got her,” a woman’s voice echoing in your ears.

this time, you heard the other footsteps, “i got the other too.”

whoever had the gun pulled you up and pulled you back to where the other voice had come from. your breath was caught in your throat, as your eyes veered to the side. jacob was standing there, heavy breaths leaving his body. you closed your eyes, daring not to move a muscle as you tried calming yourself. this time, it was slowly working.

“great,” you heard from behind you. the voice was eerily familiar. “it's so good to see you, agent l/n. man, i knew you were good, but wow, taking out almost all my men. you spared two though…”

from your right, you saw the tall figure, your eyes almost popping from your head: kim younghoon.

“what the fuck are you doing here?” you yelled.

“what does it look like? you didn’t think you'd get away with it again, did you?” he asked, leaning up on sangyeon, patting his shoulder. “my good friend sangyeon here got you where i needed you.”

“what do you mean?”

“i knew you wouldn't notice anything but him when you came in. blinded by love. you still don't even know who’s holding a gun to your head or jacob’s, do you?”

you slowly turned your head, making eye contact with hyunjae. you should've known. you turned your head a bit more, face to face with miyeon, “you bitch. i knew it.”

“surprise,” she smiled evilly, turning you back around to face younghoon. 

“miyeon told me you pinged youngro’s phone; too bad he’s nowhere around here anymore,” younghoon said, twisting a weapon of his own in his hand.

“where is he?” jacob asked, staring at younghoon.

“hm… not sure. heaven? hell? depends on how good of a person he was,” younghoon said with a chuckle.

“you killed him?” you clamored.

“no, no, not me… hyunjae.”

you looked at hyunjae, and he nodded. “it was a relief.”

“as i was saying, you didn't even notice,” younghoon said, walking to the back of the room, ripping the curtain down. you and jacob both gasped as there were multiple enclosures: eric, sunwoo, and kevin all locked up, tied, and tape on their mouths.

you could have fainted. you felt suffocated. “why?”

“why? you’re asking me why? i thought you would know already. how i put you with him all the time, it was all a test, y/n. the night of the banquet, i had a great idea, to put you

on a mission and see how you'd act around this asshole,” yunghoon pushed sangyeon’s head with his gun, circling him.

“it turns out you didn't hate him as much as i hoped. that's when i came up with this, the hit list. sangyeon was the perfect guy to have on the list first. i have to admit, he surprised me by showing up on one of the missions unannounced. so i thought about it, i recruited miyeon and hyunjae, found a nice house to make you think no one knew where it was, put you in the house with someone you were supposed to despise, only to find out you two are back together.”

at the sound of that, miyeon pressed the gun further into you. you squeezed your eyes shut, opening them slowly as you came face to face with younghoon.

“my best agent, i told you not to betray me like this. all i needed was one more person who hated sangyeon as much as i in hyunjae and someone who hated you in miyeon. i didn't want to have you watch me kill him.”

“kill him?” you heard from behind you.

“wait… don't kill him, please… i won't talk to him anymore, just please,” you pleaded.

“it's too late for that, y/n, and i can't have witnesses, so… your friends have to go, too. this all could have been avoided, all of it.”

“you have petty beef with sangyeon, and now you're taking it out on everyone else,” jacob said. “you've always been like this.”

“like what, jacob?” younghoon asked, walking over to jacob this time.

“jealous. you're jealous of sangyeon because he’s always been the better person. jealous of y/n, after all, she was the one people went to in that building, not you; it makes so much sense. ever since you and sangyeon hyung fucking started yz you've been like this.”

“shut up jacob,” younghoon said, trying to ignore him.

“you’re so mindless. why was it always y/n you targeted when it came to being close to hyung? you knew how smart they were when together. but you waited three years to say something because they started dating; that’d mean you’d never get rid of him.”

“jacob, i’m warning you.”

“not only that, but you made up a bullshit lie to me back then about how sangyeon left you, but it was the other way around the whole time. you kicked him because no bone in your body could properly compliment him and give him the props he deserved.”

“shut the fuck up,” younghoon pointed his gun at sangyeon’s head, eyes bloodshot. he looked sinister. younghoon let out a maniacal laugh, shaking the gun between you and jacob now. “jealous? i could never be jealous, you hear me?”

“but you were,” jacob finished.

“you know what! i’m tired of both of them being in my face. shoot them.”

sangyeon screamed behind the tape, moving the chair a bit. you glanced over at jacob, nodding before reaching up to “scratch” your stomach. you reached under your shirt, glancing at jacob once more, seeing if he was looking at you. 

once you met his side glance and heard each gun cock, almost immediately both you and jacob broke out of the holds, stabbing both hyunjae and miyeon in the necks with tranquilizing darts.

younghoon watched in horror, seeing both of his pupils fall to the ground unconscious. you grabbed the gun that was in miyeon’s hand, pointing it up to the sky, firing it to signal changmin and jiwon, who were still in the car.

“how did you?” younghoon asked, his footsteps nearing you and jacob again.

“i mean, it’s obvious. they're smart,” sangyeon said behind younghoon, brandishing the knife you’d slipped to him when you'd first gotten there. younghoon turned to sangyeon wide-eyed, “what? don’t act like a bitch now.”

you looked over at sangyeon, who still had to untie his ankles, but the tape was long gone, and his hands were free.

jacob also picked up a gun, grimacing at the weapon before sliding it to sangyeon, who was still untying the knots as he ignored the gun. younghoon knew how good at fighting you and sangyeon were, so the rational option for him was to run, and he did.

he bolted from in the middle of you and jacob, rushing down the stairs past changmin and jiwon. before you took off, jacob stopped you, “i’m coming with you.”

you hesitated but nodded, looking back to sangyeon, who was finally on the second knot, “go without me, i’ll be there soon.”

changmin and jiwon started to look around for keys to let the others out as you and jacob took off after younghoon. as both of you rushed down the stairs, you saw the front door was open, telling jacob to follow you. once you ran outside, you looked around for any sign of him, not finding any trace of which way he could've gone. you ran forward a bit more, gripping your hair in frustration.

jacob walked ahead of you, turning to face you to tell you he was gonna go left and you right, but right as he turned, he spotted younghoon standing at the door pointing his gun at you, a crooked grin plastered on his face.

it all happened so fast; in the blink of an eye, jacob pushed you to the ground, and a gunshot rang in your ears. you were gonna ask why jacob did what he did, but as you turned around to face him, you saw crimson stain jacob’s shirt right in his rib area.

you looked up at jacob in fear, a scream leaving your mouth as you caught your best friend before he could hit the gravel. you chucked the gun down, hands shaking as you held jacob in your arms. your only focus being on where the gunshot had hit him. you lifted up his shirt and tried to hold the wound with your bare hands.

you didn't notice that sangyeon had made his way down. you didn't notice younghoon had collapsed to the ground unconscious because changmin had also given sangyeon a tranq. you didn't see the police rushing to the scene. you noticed none of it.

“fuck! why would you do that? no, no, no…” you repeated. you looked at his face, a small smile on it.

“i’m… i’m okay…” he croaked, coughing.

your voice cracked, tears falling from your eyes, mixing with the blood on jacob’s skin. you rubbed a hand on his cheek, “you can't fucking die, y-you fucking hear me? no matter how annoying you get, no matter how much you nag me, no matter how much you pick on me, i fucking love you. you can't fucking leave me, jacob. stay with me, okay? w-we’re gonna get some help, okay, stay with me.”

sangyeon came up behind you, cutting a piece of his shirt as he handed it to you, “keep some pressure on it. jacob, please stay awake. the emt is almost here.”

but jacob was fading out. the blood he was losing was almost too much. you pressed down on the wound once more, watching jacob wince in pain, baring his teeth.

the others had made it down, taking in the brutality of it all. eric was the first one to run over to you two. he looked down at jacob’s paling face, dropping down on his knees beside you, ignoring the pain the rocks digging into him caused. eric’s breath began to stagger as he wiped his eyes harshly, holding onto jacob’s hand, sniffing, “hyung… please.”

kevin himself had gotten over his initial shock and started tearing up, staring at how your body was slumped in defeat. sangyeon had to walk away from it, hands on his hips as he looked up at the sky, trying his best to be the calm one in this situation. as the emts pulled onto the lot, you let them take jacob away, hauling him into the back.

eric was the one who went with them; you knew you couldn't take it anymore as you sat on your knees on the ground, covered in his blood. your hands were still shaking as you looked at them. your breathing picked up, and your throat felt tight. 

sangyeon, who had turned back around, saw you hyperventilating as he rushed to you. you felt sangyeon wrap his arms around your shoulders, but it was too late. you leaned forward, gripping the rocks as you broke down completely. it was a heartbreaking sight: your screams and sobs of anguish, the pain you felt in your stomach, in your heart, you could have thrown up from how hard you were crying.

sangyeon pulled you into him as he rocked you from side to side, trying his hardest to comfort you. your cries were only slightly muffled by sangyeon’s shoulder as you gripped his torn shirt in your hand.

you held onto sangyeon, thankful that you had him during this, but you were praying a eulogy was not next on your agenda.

the car ride to the hospital was silent, save for the radio playing a soft tune.

the blood on your hands was drying, but sangyeon’s hand never left yours. you kept your eyes forward, your leg bouncing as you neared the hospital. once sangyeon parked the car, the others got out before you and sangyeon did. sangyeon turned to you, “y/n.”

you looked over at him, blinking slowly before your eyes fogged again. he nodded, bringing your face to his and kissing your forehead, “i know, baby, i know.”

you cried silently, looking down as tears fell on the console. “i… this is my fault… this is all my fucking fault.”

“hey, wait, don't say that. you did nothing wrong.”

“yes i did, i shouldn’t have stayed at that fucking company, i should’ve.. i should’ve protected jacob better than i did. i should've been the one who got shot not him. god, it should've been fucking me–"

“y/n… you didn't know this would happen.”

“the whole plan was centered around no one getting hurt, we had it planned out in the van and we should've–"

“baby, listen to me. again, you had no idea what would happen; there’s no way you could have planned out any of this. i know how much you don't want to hear this, but you can’t save and protect everyone. i’m not saying jacob is gone, and god knows i don't want that. the point is, you know a simple plan going into the unknown isn’t a guaranteed success.”

of course, you knew that, and without knowing what you all were going into, you should've known this plan was bound to fall through. knowing your friend was fighting for his life in the building you were parked in front of didn't hurt any less. the uncertainty of it all lingered in your body and felt bone-crushingly real.

you looked at sangyeon, finding pity in his eyes. something you hated. but in that moment, you had to have looked pitiful. you nodded along with what he was saying before letting out a soft, “i know.”

“but i’m with you. every step of the way. i love you, okay.”

“i love you too.”

he pecked your lips softly, pulling back, not letting your hand go.

you inhaled sharply trying to get yourself together before you nodded and signaled for him to get out. you opened the car door, stepped from the vehicle, and walked with sangyeon hand in hand inside. as sangyeon told the front desk people who you were there for, (trust they already knew) they told you the rest of everyone was in the waiting room.

sangyeon walked you to the nearest bathroom, ignoring the glances sent your way, and helped you clean your hands until the blood was gone. he then walked you back to the waiting room, where eric was now with everyone, quietly talking with kevin. sangyeon pulled you into him, holding you and rocking from side to side just like before, this time, eric holding one of your hands.

this whole situation made you tired, but you felt like you couldn't sleep; that's what you told yourself before taking an hour-and-a-half nap wrapped in sangyeon’s arms. eric had also fell asleep, leaning on sunwoo (even though sunwoo wanted oh so badly to hit him off). you woke up to sangyeon shaking you gently, and a mumble left your lips.

you sat up, your eyes blinking away the gleam of the bright hospital lights. you looked up at the figure in front of you, doctor ahn smiling down softly at you.

“how’s it going l/n?” he squat down, patting the hand resting on your leg.

“i’ve been better.”

“i know, but i came with good news and bad news. which would you like first?”

“good, please.”

“good news is, jacob is going to be just fine. the surgery went well, but he’s in his room resting.”

you perked up at the news, sitting up a bit in your seat. “what's the bad news?”

“he won't be out for a bit, so no missions for you.”

you chuckled at that irony. you shrugged, leaning forward and hugging doctor ahn, as he ignored your bloody clothes and hugged back. “thank you.”

he pulled away, nodding at you, “have to take care of my favorite patient’s loved ones.”

“you're just saying that to flatter me.”

“i might be.”

you gasped dramatically before the two of you laughed. “so when can we, you know… visit him?”

“right now we only allow one person at a time, so you all have to decide who goes first.”

you looked between everyone, none of them really wanting to wake jacob. you looked up at doctor ahn as he stood back upright, “i’ll come back later today, if that’s okay.” 

doctor ahn nodded, patting your shoulder. “they already know you here, you’re his family so if they give you any trouble later on today, you call me.”

“that’s so embarrassing. they already know me…”

“you break limbs and jump back so fast i’m surprised they know you, too.”

sangyeon covered up his mouth, fighting off a laugh as you turned and looked at him. he whistled again, looking elsewhere, patting his leg as you narrowed your eyes at him. you didn't notice sunwoo had finally begun to push eric off of him. the push, however, was rougher than intended.

“what! what did i miss?” eric yelled as he jolted up, still half asleep.

all of you turned to eric, wide-eyed as sunwoo sucked in his lips, standing up and making his way out of the building silently. 

as all of you left, sangyeon dropped everyone off one by one. 

it was down to you and sangyeon. neither of you wanted to return to the house to retrieve your things just yet, not feeling comfortable enough. 

you laughed a bit as you looked over at sangyeon, finally noticing how messed up you both looked. his shirt was torn and bloody, and your clothes were bloodied and covered in dirt. you both looked disgusting. sangyeon glanced over at you, a smile filling his features.

“what?” he asked, turning back to the road.

“we look so bad,” you laugh covering your mouth with a hand.

“speak for yourself, i look rustic.”

“yeah, if rustic means smelly and dirty.”

“well… i mean, it kind of does,” he looks at you, sly look on his face as if he cornered you.

“oh shut up.”

one last laugh was shared between the two of you before silence fell over the car once again. it was comfortable, it was still, and frankly, it was peaceful. you hadn't felt this at peace in the past year, and it was a breath of fresh air.

“so…” you broke the silence, looking over at him. “what now?”

“you're not going to your apartment. i know that much.”

“wha– why not? i miss my bed. the bed i was sleeping in was okay but my bed is so–"

“you're coming over to my place,” he said, stopping at a light. he placed a hand on your thigh and softly rubbed it.

“oh. for how long?”

“as long as you want to, baby.”

you smiled, grabbing his hand, bringing his knuckles to your lips. “thank you.”

“for what?” he beamed, watching you kiss his hand.

“taking me back and being there for me.”

“don't thank me. i’m just fulfilling my husband duty…” he fake coughed, rubbing his nose a bit before driving once again.

“there’s been way too much husband talk lately. you want me so bad,” you exclaimed, playing with his fingers.

“and you already know that.”

sangyeon pulled into his driveway, stopping you from opening your door as he got out and ran to the other side to get you out. you grinned as he pulled you from the car, carrying you bridal style until he got inside.

today had been long… and it’d only been five in the evening.

once you and sangyeon were showered and the blood-stained clothes were tossed, sangyeon walked back to his living room, hopping on the couch beside you. he pulled you into him, rubbing your back noting how you were sitting there in absolute silence.

“hungry?”

you shook your head.

“sleepy?”

you shook your head.

“wanna go back to the hospital?”

you nodded, keeping your focus in front of you. it hadn’t been long, let alone an hour, since you’d left, but you felt obligated to return. that was your unofficial yet official best friend lying in there right now; you had to stay with him until you saw his eyes open, and he was talking shit to you again.

sangyeon understood as he said not another word, moving from you as he stood up to get his keys, twirling them between his fingers. he gave you a short nod toward the door as you shot up, walking to the door for what felt like the thousandth time that day.

vehicles should be your home at this point because it felt like you couldn't stay out of them. the hospital wasn’t far, but in your mind, it felt far. as you got back to the destination you were at before, you got out of the car quickly, making your way to the front desk.

thankfully, they caused you no trouble, as doctor ahn believed, but they didn’t let sangyeon go back due to the one-person rule. sangyeon grabbed your arm before you began to walk to the room they told you about.

“are you sure you want to be back there alone?”

“i have to sangyeon… that’s my friend… every time i’ve been cooped up in the hospital, he’s been right beside me. i have to do the same for him.”

sangyeon’s face still showed a bit of uncertainty. it wasnt that he didnt believe you could, its that he believed you shouldn't. there was no telling how your mental state was, especially with all youve been through in just the past day, let alone the past year.

you could see on his face he was wary but eased his nerves by placing a kiss on his cheek. “i’ll be okay, i pinky promise,” you smiled softly, holding out your pinky.

sangyeon stared at your pinky for a little while, lacing his pinky with yours. he let out a sigh, kissing your pinky before letting it go. he watched as you made your way to the designated room, sending him a wave as you make your way down the next hall. 

once you got to the room, the emotion of it all rushed back to you as you saw him laid up in the hospital bed: dried lips, pale skin, machines hooked up to him. maybe sangyeon was right to worry. you couldn't do this…

you had to though.

you wanted to cry again seeing him; you walked over to him, standing beside the bed, wanting to slap him for what he did to which you refrained of course.

“you fucking idiot… i can't believe you,” you laughed softly. “i’m happy you're okay, but please don’t do that shit again. if you do i’ll kill you myself.” you plopped down in a seat, wiping your eyes, scooting toward the bed. you moved a strand of hair from his face, sighing.

“thank you. thank you so much. im making it extra official today that you’re my best friend,” you said as you let a few tears fall down your cheeks. “i’ll be sure to tell you that when you wake up. no matter what.”

it took a few hours until they moved jacob to a new room from icu. sangyeon brought you a quick meal since you hadn't eaten all day and watched you eat it until it was finished. since they allowed it, you decided to stay for the night, telling sangyeon to go on to his place without you. 

you didnt miss the way his eyebrows furrowed and the worry go back right to his face. you assured him you’d be fine and he knew you wouldn't give up and go with him to get proper rest so he left with one more kiss, watching you make your way to the room. you laid yourself down on the couch with one last glance at jacob and a goodnight.

you woke up confused as you had no idea how long you had slept, but your eyes opened slowly, and you heard talking in the room. you turned your head toward jacob’s bed, seeing him up, listening to doctor ahn speak to him. you almost fell off the couch with how fast you sat up.

you rushed over to the bed, eyes wide and bright as you stared at him. “you’re up!”

jacob nodded, a smile on his face, “i told you i was okay.” 

you held his face in your hands, before slapping it lightly, “don’t you fucking dare do that again, you hear me?”

doctor ahn laughed behind you, looking down at jacob’s glare. “okay now, no hitting my patients please.”

you stood up, staring at doctor ahn before pointing at jacob, “can you believe him? taking a bullet for me like some type of hero. how dare he?”

“i already gave him a strict talking to y/n, trust me, he knows not to do it again,” he said, tapping his clipboard on his palm.

“that’s not enough, i have to beat his ass. you know i wouldn't have minded getting shot for a second time,” you told jacob disappointedly, forgetting that you were supposed to show your gratitude like you did the night before. “it’s so hard to be appreciative right now.”

“it’s not hard; you’re just stubborn,” doctor ahn said to you. “that and you're mad—i get it.”

“who’s side are you on?”

“the one who saved your life.”

you sighed, looking down at your feet, rubbing your temples. you were mad he took the bullet for you, but you were also happy you had people like jacob around you to even think about doing that. you fought to the conclusion looking at jacob, “thank you, but if you do that again, you won't be able to walk anymore. caused by me.”

jacob cleared his throat, looking up at doctor ahn, “could you put me to sleep again?”

it had been weeks since jacob had first got emitted into the hospital; now, he was finally released with antibiotics and an empty stomach. just like most of your hospital visits, you and jacob went out for burgers, this time along with sangyeon, eric, sunwoo, jiwon, changmin, and kevin. 

all parties from the last mission were together again, a basket of fries being shared between you all. when jiwon finally saw you again, she fell to her knees to apologize to you. she explained how she had no idea what miyeon was up to, and she was sorry for how she had treated you. 

jiwon was young, near eric’s age, and she explained that she looked for acceptance from miyeon, who was two years older than her; it was clear she never really got the friendship or guidance at cre.ker unless she was a follower. you decided that holding a grudge would never get you anywhere, so you accepted the apology with no hard feelings held.

“so… what are we gonna do?” eric asked, looking around the table as he shoved another handful of fries in his mouth. 

everyone looked at eric, signaling for him to continue. “i mean you know, none of us have an agency anymore. what are we gonna do?”

you gasped softly, remembering that none of you had bosses anymore, one was dead and one belonged behind bars for life. “i didnt even think about that,” you said, covering your mouth as you spoke.

“yeah, me either,” sangyeon said, tapping his fingers on the table. the plates of the different burgers finally came out as you thanked the servers and began cutting up your own.

once you cut yours in half, you passed one of the halves to sangyeon as he passed his half to you.

“not at the table please,” eric said, holding his hand out and shaking it in disapproval.

“what?” you and sangyeon asked simultaneously.

“that was basically porn, wasn’t it,” jacob said, looking over at eric, his own face contorted in disgust. eric nodded and sunwoo nodded along with him, looking over at you and sangyeon, shaking his head.

“i still can't get over the fact that you two are back together,” eric said, “the way you ended things with hyung, i’d never thought he–"

“i didn't even know they dated in the first place,” kevin cut eric off, his knife pointing between the two of you. “imagine how shocked i was. like i knew she liked him, but i thought she was too much of a scaredy cat to–"

“okay!” you interrupted.

“you guys have dated before?!” changmin challenged. “oh! that's why every time you thought about hyung on a mission you punched the head of the seat! see now that makes way more sense. now that i think about it, when you punched it because of miyeon, was it because you were jeal–"

“i said okay!” you exclaimed again.

sangyeon smirked from beside you, sipping on his drink before speaking, “she was really jealous.”

sangyeon turned to you, the smirk still on his face, “you punched seats thinking about me? that’s kinda hot–"

“does no one know the meaning of ‘okay’?” you questioned, looking around the table. most of them laughed or stifled one while sunwoo’s face was one of disgust; what sangyeon said having made it that way.

as you glanced around the table (holding in a laugh yourself), your focus fell on jiwon, noting how she hadn't spoken since you all had gotten inside the restaurant. “you okay, jiwon?”

she looked up at you, looking around the table as everyone elses attention was now on her. she nodded, “yeah, i’m… i’m good. just thinking, i guess.”

“you know we’re good now, right?”

she nodded, a small smile on her face.

“i won't make you beg to be accepted by me if that makes you feel better.”

she let out a light chuckle, looking over at you, “i sure hope not, but that’s not what i was really thinking about.”

“oh? then what were you thinking about?”

everyone at the table was focused on jiwon (and the burgers).

“i don’t know, i was just… nevermind. it's silly.”

“have you heard eric talk? can’t be sillier than that,” jacob said, stuffing his face with the burger. 

“you should be lucky you got hurt because if you weren’t hurt, i'd jump over this table,” eric expressed, sunwoo scoffing at him. eric looked at sunwoo, eyebrows furrowed, “what problem do you have with me?”

“none,” sunwoo said, simply sipping his drink and adding more sauce to his plate (they were best friends at this point).

“anyway, what you could say couldn’t be stupider than most of what eric says,” you told her, bringing fries to your plate. eric threw his hands up in frustration, not saying anything else, opting to eat his sadness away instead.

sangyeon chuckled, patting his back as he looked over to jiwon as well.

“it’s just, i heard the reason why younghoon didn’t want you two together from eric when he told me and changmin what went down in the actual building, and i mean, if he was so scared of you two coming together because of how smart you were–"

she took a pause before looking up at everyone at the table.

“why don’t you guys start an agency of your own?” she finished, uncertainty in her voice.

“oh my gosh, do we have the same mind? i was just thinking that!” kevin said, pointing at her before looking between you and sangyeon. “you and, can i call you hyung? i mean, everyone else does, but i don't really know you well, and we haven't talked before, really, and–"

“you can,” sangyeon said, his arm draping behind your back.

“cool! so you and hyung can get a building, take both agency’s employees and boom-bada-bing, the crown lead agency.”

“the what?” you asked, finishing off what was left of the half sangyeon gave you.

“give me a break, i came up with it on the spot.”

“crown leadance?” sunwoo asked, looking at kevin.

“ooh that's nice, i like that, quiet guy i’ve talked to like three times,” kevin nodded.

“quiet? yeah, right,” eric murmured, sarcastically. “anyway, what about dreamlike agency?”

“i like that too!” kevin exclaimed.

“i don’t know, i kind of like thrill enterprises,” jacob said.

kevin stayed quiet, sucked in his lips and looked over at jacob.

“what? you don’t fuck with it?”

“okay, listen, all that sounds nice and all, but where in the world would we find the money to do any of that? plus there aren’t many buildings we can afford in the heart of seoul,” you explained to everyone.

“i might know a place,” sangyeon said as he looked at you.

you looked up at him, an eyebrow raised as he looked at everyone else.

“wait, are you actually down to run our own agency? i mean thats kind of scary, no?” you asked him, your eyes filling with worry.

“you’re smart? i'm smart. you’re strong? i'm strong, and more importantly, we have each other and these guys… and girl–” he glanced at jiwon as she smiled. “–around this table. i think we got this, baby. plus i might just might have some money i can spend, but only if you want to do this.”

you gulped, tapping your foot on the floor. you looked at everyone’s faces as they waited in anticipation for your answer. these were people you trusted, these were people you felt you could begin a new journey with so you said, “fuck it. let’s do it.”

and so they cheered.

months and months had passed since that plan was made. now a year and a half out, you all watched as cre.ker and yz were cleared out and sold to the highest bidder, you all watched as younghoon was tried and sentenced to prison, and you all watched as miyeon and hyunjae were tried for lesser sentences yet were still to be put on house arrest and heavy surveillance.

while all of it happened, sangyeon had moved you out of your apartment and into his house. the four-story building he talked about before, he had finally gotten; the boys (and jiwon) all helped to ensure the building was in top shape so you could fill it; you and sangyeon made the place as you wanted. almost every floor was different, and you and sangyeon stopped by each day to help the workers in the space.

after months of work, it was finally opening day. you stood in the building looking around, taking a deep breath as you smoothened out your dress. you were too focused on the place to notice sangyeon leaning on a wall watching you. 

“baby?”

you turned around, softly smiling at your boyfriend. “you look handsome, lee.”

“and you look gorgeous, my love,” he walked over to you, pulling you toward him by the waist. “nervous?”

“very.”

“hey, remember what i said back then, you will always have me no matter what happens.”

you nodded, wrapping your arms around his neck, pecking his lips, “i love you so much.”

“and i love you more.”

as he was about to go in for another kiss, someone cleared their throat behind you two. you peeked over sangyeon’s shoulder, finding jacob. “they’re ready for the ribbon cutting.”

“there isn’t many people out there, right?” sangyeon asked, keeping a hand on your waist as he stood beside you.

“no. just us really,” jacob responded. “i made sure no news sources were coming near us.”

“perfect.”

you looked up at him, nodding for him to go first as he took your hand in his, guiding you to the front of the building. as you two stepped out, you were met with familiar faces that were cheering and clapping for the two of you. 

as the cheers died down, sangyeon began speaking, “hi everyone, i’m not the best with speeches, so i'll keep this short so you all can get in there and look at your new building. first off, i want to thank the losers and the amazingly smart jiwon for putting this thought into our minds in the first place–”

everyone clapped except for jacob who yelled out a, “hey!”

sangyeon held in his laughter as he continued, “most importantly, i’d like to thank this absolutely beautiful lady beside me for being there for me and loving me no matter how much i got on her nerves.” he softly kissed your temple as his hand fell back onto your waist.

“gross!” eric yelled, earning a few laughs.

sangyeon squinted his eyes at him before continuing, “anyway, this is all new to us, but i’m so excited for what’s to come. you all are hard working, both y/n and i know that, so we know we’ll be able to succeed as an amazing agency. i don’t like to think of myself as your boss, but as a peer to you all, just as it was before.”

“yeah! me too!” you said, raising a hand.

he smiled at you, “her too. only i can call her boss lady." you hit his shoulder, rolling your eyes as he kept speaking. “still, we trust in you guys. that’s why we made sure it was only us here for the opening. this agency should be treated as a private agency should be treated.”

“i thought you said you were keeping it short!?” eric yelled again. this time, it was your eyes that landed on the younger man. oh, did he know to shut up then.

“well, let me finish up since i’m taking too long for eric’s fickle mind, i just want to say thank you again. not only for believing in us, but for us being able to believe in you all.”

jacob handed you the large scissors, sangyeon’s hands laying on top of yours. you looked up at him, fondness and love being the only emotions pooling from his eyes as he stared into your own.

“ready?” he asked.

“always, with you,” you responded, turning to the crowd. “well, everyone, welcome to r.e.v.e.a.l unity.”

as you snipped the ribbon, everyone clapped and cheered once again.

“i still think crown leadance was better,” sunwoo whispered to kevin, making kevin snort and cover his mouth. 

sangyeon leaned down, bringing you into him for a chaste kiss and a hug before pulling away and looking at everyone who was still cheering. “what are you all waiting for? go on, go look around,” he announced.

“there’s food on the second floor as well, so help yourself!” you yelled over the murmurs and talking as everyone passed you.

as everyone made their way into the building, you, jacob and sangyeon stayed back for a bit, looking over the evening skyline.

“i’m proud of you guys, you know?” jacob said, shoving his hands in his pockets as he turned to the two of you. “not only for this but for being great friends in the process.”

“you’re an amazing friend as well, jacob,” sangyeon conveyed.

you were about to agree with sangyeon before a thought came to your head, “oh yeah! jacob i forgot to tell you when you were in the hospital… i feel like we should make it official.”

“what?”

“that we’re best friends.”

“you waited a year for that? i don’t even get a ring or necklace or anything?!”

“do you want a necklace?” you tilted your head, wrapping one of your arms around sangyeon as you spoke.

“it would be nice, yes.”

“then we’ll get matching ones.”

“great!” jacob walked over to you hugging you and shaking you in his hold before pulling away. “that’s one for the year.”

you laughed, looking back over the skyline. you were too enamored with the way the sun set to notice jacob pulling something from his pocket and giving a handshake to sangyeon to pass it before walking inside. 

“it’s beautiful,” sangyeon said, turning back to you.

you nodded, not drawing your eyes away, “it is. feels more beautiful knowing how happy i am now.”

“i feel like i say it too much, but i'm so happy i have you, y/n. it’s felt so amazing waking up to you every morning, feeling loved every time i see you, and like, i’ve never felt like this strong about anything.”

you looked over to him, a hand on his cheek, “i’m happy i have you, sangyeon.”

“i feel like, i don’t know how to show how much i love you, it can never be expressed enough. all i have ever wanted through these four to five years was you. i might be cheesy but i truly believe i loved you at first sight; god, i love you so much, and i thought long and hard how to show you–” sangyeon cleared his throat, shaking the nervousness from his limbs before taking your hand from his face to hold it in his own.

the breath was sucked from you as you saw him get on one knee, looking up at you with foggy eyes. you gawked, your other hand slapping on your mouth. your eyes brimmed with tears as he continued, “y/n l/n, to show you my love, i want to continue my life knowing i’m vowed to you and you only. will you marry me?”

sangyeon was so nervous he forgot he had a ring box in his hand, but it didn’t matter. you fell to your knees in front of him not caring about your dress and nodded, grabbing his face and wiping his tears, “yes, lee sangyeon. a million times, yes.”

“yes?”

you nodded again as he pulled you into him. you cried into his neck, trying not to stain his collar, but to be fair, sangyeon didn’t care if you did. he pecked your lips multiple times before chuckling to himself as he finally remembered the ring, “oh yeah.”

he pulled away, grabbing your left hand and placing the ring on your ring finger, grinning as the ring fit perfectly. you laughed softly before pulling him back in a tight hug; sangyeon being a strong as he was, pulled you both up to your feet from his one knee as he held you in his arms. he turned around, the door to the building wide open, something else you didn’t notice.

jacob and eric stood holding the door open, sunwoo, changmin, kevin, and jiwon stood at the door, waiting, anticipating your answer. jiwon stood there with her camera, filming you both as sangyeon smiled at them, raising an arm as he held you with the other.

“she said yes!” he shouted.

jacob and eric ran over to the two of you, hugging both of you while the other four stood by the door to cheer, jiwon capturing it all on camera with a smile. you giggled, bringing your lips back to sangyeon’s as eric and jacob celebrated in between themselves. 

you stared at sangyeon, understanding now what ‘only time will tell’ truly means.

time has finally shown you how precious it can actually be; time has finally told you what it holds, and my, was it beautiful especially with this man in front of you. your fiancé.

[simmeons]

💢Gigantamax - Tell us your favorite thing about one of your friends!

ONE?! nah, im doing them all (so several people don't send it or people don't get upset i didn't pick them)

Mega: you're just a very sweet person. i don't know how else to put it- you radiate flowers and butterflies and even though i know you have your days and you write some. gut wrenching stuff. but you're also so nice to me and other people and you don't get that a lot anymore so i love that about u keep it up pookie

Andi: i know we don't interact a lot (I PROMISE ILL FINISH READING THE COWBOY ENTERPRISE STUFF I PROMISE IM TRYING IM i clutch your pants as im on the floor crying at ur feet) but your posts about your life are a reality check for me. NOT THAT'S IT'S A BAD THING. you're very honest about what you deal with (anxiety, having a child, etc etc) and it kinda helps in grounding me when i have my own anxiety and think the world is gonna die and then i see you out here also dealing with stuff and still making it by. idk. you're indirectly the adult i look to and go "okay i probably won't crash and burn. hoorah" i really hope that's not weird

Jawsh: you're a little weirdo. don't ever stop. ur so funny to talk to and im sorry for the days we don't talk a lot but i love that we can come back and still chat about old men yaoi like nothing happened. also i love our shared bond over hating Sundays. fuck Sunday

Snowy: you're so yuri crazy i genuinely love it. I love Snowbot, i love how enthusiastic you are about Lore. never let anyone tell you ur weird bc that's my job and never stop posting Snowbot please don't ever die (also ur art style is so good brah. like it tastes absolutely wonderful to me. thank you for blessing us)

Leaf: hey man i know you don't have Tumblr so that means i can be a little shit n you won't know! but seriously, i love how we have so many things in common. you got me into Star Trek and i can never thank you enough. you're also great at distracting me and you're always there to show me ur Legos. i wish you and Celery the best (Celery isn't their actual name it's a nickname i gave them)

Matt (Kaklord): you're a ball of fun in our socks server. yes i count you as my friend get in this hug alright buddy yeaahh bring it in. i love how you're very enthusiastic about Vulcans and their. cough. biology. plus Pokemon. you're just awesome sauce man. you constantly wear sunglasses bc ur so cool and you're allowed to flex ur aura

Vitor: you're the reason why i stop and hesitate when i have suicidal thoughts. WOOAH way to hit y'all with something dramatic but im not joking. you're so special to me. you make me stop and think about who i affect everyday and though sometimes i hate how special you are and how much you care because i want to be selfish and end it all without caring about others- but i can't. so thank you for that

[reioka-reads]

Title: Iron Widow

Author: Xiran Jay Zhao

Status: Keep

Series Continue: Yes

Okay. So. I’m going to preface this by saying that this has some spoilers in it. It’s only been a year so I’m aware that some people might still be on the waiting list at their library for this NYT Best Seller lol.

Anyway, sometimes I take a peep at the negative reviews on books to see if it changes my perspective and this time they absolutely did not. A lot of the negative reviews on this book have the same talking points: It feels rushed/some parts feel shoehorned in. And I agree. But you know what? Zhao does too. I remember them making a post somewhere (I follow them on both Tumblr and TikTok so it could have been either one) explaining how they had to cut back parts because it was their debut novel and in the publishing industry, the companies don’t like those novels to exceed a certain amount. Zhao, also, was not satisfied with their novel as it was published. Knowing that, I felt like I could see the parts where they cut back to fit into those guidelines. I think, if they hadn’t had to cut back, it would have been an even better book than it is.

That being said, I thought this book was great. I actually caught Zhao on TikTok and that’s what led me to reading the book (they are very funny and clever). It was an interesting premise and I enjoyed it. It felt very… refreshing, somehow? I’m not sure that’s the word I want but you know, after the inundation of vampires/werewolves/wizard schools the past few years, it was a breath of fresh air. I especially loved that the one-sidedness of the love triangle lasted maybe about a minute before all of these bi disasters decided actually no let’s be a true triangle. Good for them.

Zetian was brutality in its purest form. I love that for her. But I also loved the parts where she was vulnerable—where she allowed herself to be vulnerable in front of the men she loved. And how she refused to feel shame in front of others either. I also, for some reason, really like that she’s disabled? And it’s a focal point of the story, her constantly thinking about how she’s crippled and how it was supposed to make her desirable but all it did was make her life harder; how she’s constantly comparing her Lotus feet to the unmarred feet of her female peers and feeling envy and shame. It’s not a throwaway problem, it doesn’t get fixed, and I’m interested to see how it’s going to show up in the story in the future. I wish we could have seen Yizhi and Shimin fleshed out as much as she was, but the breadcrumbs that were dropped that I pieced together have me looking forward to maybe seeing more fleshing out in the sequel(s).

This story had so many twists and turns that I was constantly and genuinely shocked (delightfully so!) when they happened. I itched to get back to the book when I had to put it down; I wanted to know what happened next. I honestly didn’t expect the betrayal from the Black Tortoise and Shimin’s “death,” and I mourned with Zetian as soon as his qi reader hit zero. Then she actually found Qin Zheng and the yellow dragon! Piloted it herself!!! And then Shimin wasn’t dead and apparently the “gods” had saved him?! What the fuck!!!! And Yizhi simply killing his father with no remorse, no regrets. Qiu was probably the only person who figured out how Zetian truly ticked and he was so busy facing off with her that he didn’t even think his son could or would turn on him. My only beef is that Xiuying wasn’t alive to see Zetian crush her family to death, so that she could see that Zetian was stronger than her in every way.

I have more thoughts but I can’t really seem to articulate them, so I think I’ll leave this here. So bummed that the release date for Heavenly Tyrant has been pushed back, but I appreciate that Zhao is being transparent for their reasons. If pushing it back means a better story, I’m happy to wait.

[eclipsecrowned]

30 for truthful tuesday. [looking at you autistically, microphone in hand] // @umbralined

Pupper wishes to get Kadi in trouble. Kadi will gladly get in trouble over this one.

There is a specific breed of mun, often belonging to a certain demographic but it happens regardless of income education race or gender, who think their muse is God's gift to the community. Whether you find them here on tumblr, in the badlands of forums, or among your discord experiences, it is inevitable that you will meet someone who just cannot handle what their muse actually is.

In their own head, usually because they are hella projecting onto the muse, this muse is the best thing since sliced bread. They are a near perfect copy of the mun -- let's use our former friend [REDACTED] as an example.

All her muses were able-bodied middle class east coast American women who came from military families and were proudly straight Americans whose brand of liberalism was just conservatism lite. And because that muse is so much like her -- and pick any of them, Beth, Elaine, Charlotte, even in fantasy she'd just adapt Veerle or Adamaris to be the super special white gurl foreigner -- this muse is perfect.

This muse does no wrong. Everything this muse does is cool, funny, badass. Everything this muse does is right, even in instances where the audience tries to call out obvious racism, homophobia, classism, unchecked mental illness. This is not a critique of the character's behavior/the biased writing, but of the creator herself, because the muse is a funhouse mirror of their player. Fuck you. She's going to write what she wants to write.

Except it stops being about just their muse. Suddenly, it's about you as a collaborator having a muse. Here's the role your muse has been pigeonholed into. Here's the script. Here's how in awe or cruel they are to her blessed muse. Here's what your muse is allowed to be -- remember when she'd veto my muses having disabilities or poc love interests as if that was her call?

It's no longer collaborative. It's the Beth/Elaine/Charlotte/Veerle/Elysande show, and we're just living in it. Our muses are there to talk about how cool she is, how women want to be her, how men want to make babies with her. And if you play a villain, the men obsess over her and the women want to torture her. No one can be objective about the character. Who could be objective about God's most perfect creation?

And it gets worse. The creator, totally unchecked and unable to be held in check moving forward without having an actual IRL mental breakdown, is further assured of her own skill. Her muse is perfect. The war crimes ensue, sometimes metaphorical and in [REDACTED]'s case actually for real in universe. The apologia of 'well if my muse did something bad they did it to someone worse,' except they as grown adults are unable to admit their character is capable of doing any wrong. If you are among other partners doing a plot, they refuse to be on the sidelines of it.

The relationship as collaborators and as friends becomes unsustainable because you are dealing with someone who refuses to be reasoned with, and will forever be the villain when they retell the story because you wanted a shared platform, not to be an accessory to a muse you can no longer stand.

I've been on this site since 2012 and I have seen many such muns high on their own muse's farts. Literally if you give me the most special and important heroic muse without an iota of nuance, whether Canon or OC, I'm checking out. I've seen canon serial killers be idealized as 'good people' due to possessing either the lifestyle their writer has or desires, and canon abusers be excused as 'well I mean, his wife is annoying.' I have seen OCs, many times, hold entire servers and communities hostage to their whims, whether as moderators or as simple members of a group. I can name 6 separate incidents across 12 years, and it always goes nuclear, scorched earth, kills communities and friend groups and servers. I refuse to play.

And again, fiction =/= reality, but the way people handle certain themes or concepts can say a lot about how they'll be as a collaborator --

[alexjcrowley]

Hey I just want to know something: am I the stupidest person on the planet or the f1 fandom is built differently?

Everytime I go on a social media to look up f1 content I see cute/horny (let's be honest) edits and everybody calling the drivers pookie or making memes. And that's alright, I guess.

I most definitely know that a bunch of (mostly white) men in a very competitive male-dominated sport rooted more than many others in capitalism are probably going to have scandals around them. I am not that dumb. I also know that because probably none of them is scandal-free and people who get crushes/hyperfixation on them just learn to live with them, but I didn't think they just...ignored them? Swept them under the rug? Let me explain.

When I so much as stumble on a TikTok with a song by The 1975 or McCafferty- or hell even Lovejoy recently- I see comments flooding with "bUt DoN't YoU kNoW tHeY'rE pRoBlEmAtIC?". Same happened with content about cinema or books. And on Tumblr happens less but still happens. As soon as you mention something that has ties with sexism, racism, homophobia, etc. people will soon point it out to you. Maybe because they're some of those people with the obsession of only consuming "morally pure" content, maybe they genuinely want to inform you, maybe they fucking hate that song/book/movie and want to give YOU a reason to dislike it.

But can someone tell me if I'm fucking dumb and I managed to stumble in the wrong part of instagram/tumblr/TikTok or NOBODY fucking talks about the shit some drivers have done? Because I am stumbling on a LOT of shit done by drivers I really liked lately even though I have been interested in F1 for a while now. Not too long, but enough that I think I would have heard some stuff.

Like, if I spent like 6 months on the hashtag of Guy Who Drives, why am I now finding out that they said something really discriminatory? I am just confused, I simply thought it would have popped out sooner, but apparently it was buried under 500+ posts about their abs? Like what?

I get that anyway it's not like you can cancel a driver, no matter what shit they say they'll probably still going to be racing the next weekend, but why people don't talk about it? Was my socials' fault for showing me horny posts everytime I simply looked up the name of a guy or do people don't talk about this stuff in the f1 community because "what are you gonna do anyway"?

I am leaning towards the second option because there are a few things that happened while I was already watching f1 (not in order: Lando's comments about, Trump, Hornergate, most drivers saying Hornergate was just noise) and at first people were talking about it but then they just...stopped? Like, I don't know, personally the words of disenterest many drivers expressed about Hornergate made me change my opinion about them at least a little and people seemed so outraged at first but now...it's like it never happened. Everybody back thirsting on main for Ricciardo, Norris, etc.

Genuine question, is the general response of the f1 community to these behaviours "forgive and forget in time of the next gp"? Am I missing something? I don't think they should be crucified but why I have not seen more people talking about this stuff? The "serious sport bunch" seems to be uninterested in "gossip" or whatever happens outsid the tracks, the good old fashioned fandom is writing fanfiction/making edits/funny posts, who keeps tracks of this stuff?

I have never been interested in a sport before. In the artistic world (cinema, literature, etc.) some scandals can get you out of a job and a long lasting hatred from the community. In motorsports, because the success of a driver does not depend from his fans' engagement but can be "objectively proved" by results and victories, do people just...make peace with the fact that some athletes are pieces of shit?

I want to specify it one more time, I am NOT saying LET'S CANCEL ALL THE DRIVERS AND BOO THEM BECAUSE THEY HAVE DONE SOMETHING QRONG AT SOME POINT, I am asking:

how do you deal when an athlete you cheer for does something really fucked up, and you know other athletes in the same field are no saints?

[charmac]

I love how Glenn looks like an average guy his age IRL and in his other roles but as Dennis he has kind of a waxy, gaunt look? I heard somewhere that for a scene where Dennis was lying about his age to a younger woman, they shot outdoors at an angle that would highlight his wrinkles so he would look even older. This is a man desperately shellacking makeup on his face every day to hide the fact that he's now in his late 40s and it's Not Working. I hope they show his and Dee's 50th birthday onscreen in Season 18 so he can have a full-on sobbing meltdown

"Old people? I'm 26." Literally lives rent free in my mind, the pacing, the delivery, just the fucking line takes me OUT. Genuinely one of the funniest moments of Season 15 to me. It's funny they tried to make him look older in that scene, because that was one of the rare moments where I could see more Glenn in him (aka he looked hotter). But yeah, he's been trying desperately to still be young for awhile now, especially in early 15...but less so in 16 though, would others agree?

Like he's kinda hit a bit of a lull here, he's tempering his rage, he's more living in the moment and not the past, he's thinking about Frank getting older and trying to get back on his good side as they age, he's talking about picking up men with his mommy kink... And now we go into DTAMHD and he's absolutely hitting an old person moment. New technology he can't work, dealing with automated phone systems, can't get into his stupid fucking new, young people car. He's old. He can't do it anymore, he can't pretend.

So what's the outcome of DTAMHD? Will he finally go through acceptance? Will he finally embrace the fact that he is becoming an old man and that's okay? Have we been building to the idea that he's letting go of his youth? Is that what this is...or is it going to just break him instead? Is Dennis Glenn enough to go through that same moment of zen, or is he just so removed that he can't reach it, that he can't figure out where the fuck he's going and who he is and that he's trapped between eras, floundering. Will he need guidance, or will he get somewhere on his own? Can he accept the truth or will he fight back until it drowns him?

Regardless of where we end up, "Dennis and Dee Turn 50" is something I suddenly need so, so, so, bad. They could do so much with it, if Dennis has accepted he's old now or not. The twins turning 50 is the plot of the (mid)century. Meg... Ms. Ganz,,, are you here. Please. I'm tagging you here just in case you name search yourself on Tumblr for some reason. Please, Dennis and Dee Turn 50... Please.

[drysdalehansenswhore]

Oh gosh, never in my life I thought i'd do something like that but unfortunately we're surrounded by immature and ignorant people in this world and some of them better seek therapy.

*big sigh* let's begin!

You Captdelusional and your minions are so damn ridiculous words can't even explain. The way I'm feeling second hand embarrassement. Can't believe you made a whole post "are you still a CE fan" and captioned it "that's what you got when you do PR instead of acting classes" that's so sad because you're a grown woman and act like a 10 years old and I'm being generous here.

Not to mention how you and your minions think tumblr is the only platform ever where he has fans 🤣🤣🤣 and the way you're so proud of yourself for obtaining only 220 replies as if it makes a whole fandom when it's not even half of it, but guess math is not your thing either. Careful, ignorance is showing 👀 and btw, somone who gets called "best part of the movie" by the gp and got preached by one of the best directors in the industry for his performances and people literally regret his departure from a franchise does not need "acting classes" (unless you're referring to someone else I won't name) I get that you're hurt but at least avoid saying bs for your sake. But since you act like a kid and put your fave on a pedestal , I'll do the same and reveal you that me and a good chunk of people prefer his acting over your fave which is always the same thing, kinda annoying yk? To get hooked on a character, we need truthfulness, spontaneity. Not repeating the script as it is. It just shows to me that "fans" like you can't recognize talent and it makes me laugh that you even dare to judge. Poor clown.

To each their own, ig? Anyway, sorry to break it to you and your other delusional minions but that A lister and I repeat A lister as you probably think actors come down of their position when they do sth that you don't like 😭 still has million of fans all over the platforms: X, tiktok, ig, reddit, tumblr, you name it but of course for y'all with a very low IQ only tumblr and IG exist. How ironic.

You know what else is so funny and ridiculous at the same time? before he ended up in this "pr" as you call it (which we don't know the reason and you act all almighty bec you think you have contacts in the industry but you don't even know that Hollywood force celebs to do worse things than PRs like parties with p*dophiles where your fave willing or unwilling participate in. or you think he's a saint 😇 lmao) you were all drooling over him like sl*ts. Immaturity showing big time. Clowns.

And btw, funny how you muted replies and reblogs so that no one could call you out, too bad I found a way... Finally, y'all need to stop infantalize grown up woman who can pay bills and make decisions for herselves like to have a family with grown up men who don't even care about your opinions. Wake up kids, it's 2024 and you still can't distinguish an adult woman from a kid. What now, looks? now bec someone is blessed with youthful looks can't get married bec she will always look like a "kid"? oh please, y'all need therapy and you need it asap! "child bride" you know there actual child brides (unfortunately) or your very low IQ can't get you think about it ? 🤔 stop calling "child brides" literally adults, that's disgusting and makes you a low person and a disgusting cr*ep.

GROW TF UP! At your age you should focus on work, family and your partner, if you even have one but I doubt it because with people like you no one would ever want to spend a dime on. Let alone be with you. And before you wonder, I'm no team this nor team that, I'm just patiently waiting for it to end but immature and delusional people like you showing up on my dashboard makes it all difficult.

[molsno]

i'm sorry but i can't get that tumblr piece of disney fanart that was like "here's all the disney princesses dressed as their boyfriends/husbands!!! so stunning and brave!! also here's a comic that shows how funny it would be if the male disney characters were dressed as their love interests aren't men in dresses funny anyone look how embarrased they are and how silly they look" and like everyone was reblogging it even other queer people

god. I have no idea what post you're even talking about but it gives me such like 2013 tumblr vibes it's sickening just to think about. although let's be real it's not like anything about this has really changed. everyone loves to portray femininity as inferior and degrading and claim that's somehow feminist when it's literally just textbook misogyny. it's infuriating