#let my girl explore the world goddammit

[kloudiday]

Jill in game: i want to leave the Twins and explore the world! The Twins are too small for me and I must spread my wings!

Jill in fanfics: pregnant housewife

authors write women with a personality other than “baby carriage” challenge (IMPOSSIBLE)

-_-

[vi-is-short-for-violence]

New Frontier A Hollow Knight and Bug Fables crossover OC fic.

Full fic is under the cut!

PLEASE REBLOG!! MANY HOURS WENT INTO THIS AND I’D RLLY APPRECIATE THE SUPPORT!!

It had been a very interesting trip, taking the ferry from the continent Bugaria resided to the main continent known as The Outlands. Team Snakemouth, the heros of Bugaria were treated like celebrities everywhere they went. Everyone knowing them all by name and singing their praises, and if some weren't convinced of their greatness, many times bugs would contest them in combat and were quickly swayed into seeing their power. Vi especially enjoyed this attention.. being one of the first bees to truly venture beyond the Hive and find her place in the world as an explorer and rouge. The other two would often need to reel her in. Usually Leif did not mind Vi's more combative nature, so long as it wasn't a major risk.. though her pride is what both Leif and Kabbu would regularly keep in check. Leif appeared largely indifferent about their praise, but beneath his cold exterior, his friends knew he couldn't help but be grateful and flattered. Kabbu on the other hand loved the praise as much as Vi did, but unlike her, made sure to ground himself. If their mission around the legendary Everlasting Sapling taught him anything, it was that nothing was indestructible. Not the sapling, not his team, and certainly not him. After their first adventure however the one thing they all unanimously agreed on, was that they longed to continue their quests and even venture beyond Bugarias borders, and travel the mainlands.. The Outlands. They set sail into the world... the main continent.. the setting of their greatest adventures yet.

Team Snakemouth now walked on these ancient grounds.. and already the way they'd seen the world was beyond different than the world that came into view around them all. Chompy, the fourth and most beloved member of the team, who was resting comfortably around Vis neck and shoulders spread her autumn colored leaves.. taking in the bright sun. The other three gave a breath of pure awe.. The Outlands were full of rocky and mountainous terrain. Great mountains could be seen in the distance, their might and elegance seen plain and true even in the most distant horizons. "OOOUGH WHERE DO WE GO FIRST?! THE MOUNTAINS? THE PLAINS? THAT GIANT CLIFF?? OR- OR MAYBE WE COULD SEE WHATS OUT AT SEA OVER THERE!!" Squealed the VERY excited honeybee! "I'm not sure Vi! But my.. it is truly beautiful.. just as the tales foretold!" replied Kabbu. Looking just as giddy as Vi! The sun shining onto his iridescent green shell. "We feel like we've entered an entirely different realm. We can already feel an abundance of magic and energy here.." Leif remarked, spreading his navy blue and pale yellow accented wings. "Yeah yea, but can you imagine what kinda crazy treasure we could fine here? I heard this place is ancient as HELL!" "If I recall correctly Vi, The Outlands were settled eons before Bugarias continent was! It was filled with ancient scattered kingdoms." Kabbu knelt and placed his clawed hand on the ground, as if he were resting his claws on a monument of ancient history and peering into its secrets. "Hundreds of years ago, these lands were barren wastes. Polluted and corrupted with a dark substance.. These Outlands were once called The Wastelands, lawless and filled with mad bugs. That is why these scattered kingdoms existed. In a world devoid of life and law, someone had to do something." "Are these lands not still devoid of law? Law only exists in those kingdoms still we'd imagine." Inquired Leif. Kabbu stands back up and looks at his moth friend. "Well, yes and no. Some of the rulers of these lands keep an eye on the Outlands as a means of protecting potential citizens." Vi looked at Kabbu and raised a brow, "Jeez how do you even know all this stuff Kabbu?" "Well! If we planned on visiting this place, we might as well get to know it's history a little better." Vi shrugged, "Meh, fair. But hey, there's a lotta history in treasure toooo.~" "We anticipated a response like that. Lets not dally then. Kabbu, you know more about this place than either of us, do you know where we could head first?" Kabbu hummed wonderingly. "We could potentially head for the mountains, there are a fair few kingdoms there and we could stock up on supplies for the rest of our journey!" "FUCK YEA MOUNTAINS!!" Vi cheered, much to Kabbus displeasure hearing her curse like that again. "VI!! Watch your language!". Leif proceeded only to laugh.

It had been a long day, traveling to the base of the mountains. Bandits and beasts making attempts on their supplies and even their lives. Nothing they weren't used to really. Though there were a disturbing number of poachers. A dark stain from the Wastelands past economic practices; slaying bugs and selling valuable parts of them to the black market. Primarily wings, fluff, horns, hard shells and stingers, unique defenses of specific bugs, even certain pheromones to lure in bugs like ants. To say that their encounters with the poachers did not shake the group up a fair amount.. would be a dirty lie. They triumphed, but were still very on edge if they could harvest them. The sun began to set however, and the quartet was weary from the long day. Not a bad day, only a long one. Whimsy tainted by the reminder that the life of an explorer was still a dangerous one. Regardless, the team kept their spirits up. Knowing that the next day would bring great discovery! Following a nice meal and usual banter expected of their team, Team Snakemouth set up their temporary beds, and went to sleep for the night. Though one member of the team was far less of a deep sleeper than the others.. hearing faint, yet heavy footsteps, caused on of Vis antennae to perk up. She perked up, slowly looking around the area.. bathed in moonlight, yet sheltered from it in some areas with the rocks and shelter of the mountain and nearby terrain. But she could clearly see it. In the distance.. a tall, large and shadowed figure a fair distance from the team. It's silhouette was not one that Vi could identify, it appeared to have multiple horns, but the rest of its body held no defining traits. No abdomen, no wings, just a horned head and a long cloak.. as well as.. something spilling from its head that nearly dragged against the ground. Was... this even a bug? The lack of identifying features deeply frightened the bee. She remembered the last time she saw something like this. The reminder of the canniness of the Dead Landers shot a spine straight through her of pure fear and stress. This was... big. Not nearly as big as that.. thing with those large orange eyes was.. but it was still big whatever it was. Vi, now thoroughly terrified, slowly grabbed her beemerang and slowly approached the large rock that sheltered them from outside sight. Slowly she turned back to look at the figure. They appeared to sit down, back against the base of the mountain, sifting through items that Vi could not properly see due to the lighting. She squints to try and get a better look, before her heart was thrown into the base of her stinger. It looked at her. Two bright blue sparks for eyes stared directly at her. As quick as she could she immediately ducked back behind the rock, stifling any and every sound she made by desperately covering her mouth. Claws digging into her cheeks as fear overtook her. Dammit! Being stuck in this sort of situation scared the hell out of her, no, terrified her beyond words, but at this point she was starting to grow frustrated. They were fighters goddammit! Not cowards! Her and the others took out way worse than this, she- they could do this! So then why would her limbs not move an inch? Why was she still paralyzed with horror despite her frustration and rebellion against these intense feelings of fear?? She held her beemerang in a death grip, shaking intensely, which only grew worse when those footsteps began to approach once again. Move. MOVE! "VI! KABBU! CHOMPY! ON YOUR GUARD!" yelled out another voice. The familiar crack of Leifs magic smacking against the carapace of an enemy bug, as the large figure stumbled backwards with a grunt. Leif stood over his resting spot, glowing with that cold, blue magic. Kabbu and Chompy following suit. Chompy let out a horrendous roar, the chomper had grown in size since the teams first adventure, and while not as big as the mother she would eventually become, she was still quite formidable. Horrifyingly, the other "bug" let out an enormous and otherworldly sounding roar in response, as the appendages that came down its head flared up like black vines. Even Chompy recoiled at the sight. The creature leaped back, drawing a large sword and glaring with those bright blue eyes. "Vi!" Kabbu looked over to the trembling bee. "Come on, it's okay. Lets take care of this!" He held out his hand to help her up. Snapping out of her paralysis, she glared a serious look at Kabbu. "R-right!". The dark figure loomed over all four of them. Squinting at them as they readied for battle. "Four on one don't seem too fair.." it spoke.. it's voice, surprisingly normal sounding, though it had a sort of accent that struck the four as unfamiliar. "Yeah?! And NEITHER DOES SNEAKING UP ON A GROUP WHILE THEY'RE ASLEEP!!" Shouted Vi, anger and fear clear in her young voice. She threw the beemerang with all of her might, making a sharp CRACK as it made contact with the beast. It growled.. "I was doin no such thin' lil girl! I saw you gettin' a good look at me while I was lookin' through mah thin's!" Kabbus expression lightened a bit, "Wait- then maybe this was a misunderstanding?". The creature huffed, "S'fine. M' a big guy after all.. tend t'scare a few bugs out ere.. but since ya'll got up wantin' a fight then lets have one!" The creatures voice went from a gruff, tired and frustrated tone, to sounding as if it had all the energy in the world with the prospect of a battle. "BRING IT ON BIG GUY!! WE'LL WIPE THE FLOOR WITH YOU!!" Vi angrily shouted. Kabbu and Leif looked to one another, Vi's rage evident in her tone and posture. Kabbu and Leif knew there was no bringing her back from that, but they couldn't simply leave her to fight alone. They straightened themselves out once more. The creature turned out to be quite quick for its size, and it was able to take one hell of a beating. The Team would need to react quickly to block and chip away at its health. Saving Team Points primarily for healing and reviving, as well as low cost special attacks. Unlike The Everlasting King, it could heal but it could not steal health from them, and healing spent its entire turn. What sucked however was that his defense was high and his attacks hit hard. It was tough for sure, multiple times the team would go down, but they got right back up thanks to Kabbus pep talk and Vis shared stash. Eventually, for as long as the fight went on, it eventually ended with Team Snakemouth as the victors. As the beast finally fell, the light of dawn spilled over the land. Everyone was weary and very injured. The beast chuckled, "Good fight... hh..hhh.. ain't had one like that n' a while I gotta say. Good job.." "Who.. hhh. are you.?" "And more importantly WHAT are you..?" Kabbu asked before quickly being interrupted by Vi. With the light of dawn more of the beat became visible. Its horned head was an off-white shell, that looked almost like a mask, even the right side of it had a long crack that stretched from the top of its head to the base of its chin with some grass stains littering it in some places. It wore a black and grey patchwork cloak with a blue medal clipped to it and lastly, it's eyes. Not fully blue, in fact mostly black with blue pupils that looked like sapphire rings. What spilled down from its head however? None of the bugs could identify. It wasn't antennae, or fur, and while they somewhat looked like vines, they were smooth and black and even appeared to glimmer as if they were wet. "M'names Finnley. M' from a far away Kingdom ere.. betcha mighta heard uh Hallownest. But guessin yer not quite sure what I am thats- actually a toss up huehue!" Kabbu perked up a little bit. Despite his exhaustion, he couldn't help but be excited. "I have heard mentions of that place, yes! But its whereabouts and information I am unfortunately unaware of." It was hard to tell, but Finnleys face appeared.. vaguely happy.. despite lacking a mouth and appearing more like a mask. "Well. S'where me n all my kind 're from. We're vessels, n all of us 'r siblin's too! Ya might actually run intuh a few'uh us out ere!" Leif canted his head slightly, "Vessels. An odd name for a species of bug.." "Yeah and how are ALL of you siblings?" Vi interjected, skeptical of Finnleys claims. "Well it's a long ass story, one ion't think you'd wanna hear all of from me. But you stick round long enough you'll find out soon enough. S'pretty common knowledge ere." Finnley perks up a bit. "Oh! Shit I should probably heal yall up actually. Er, gunna need t' hold yalls hands t'do it though, if ya don' mind." Leif extended his hand, aware of what this could be. He's proven correct when white energy swirls around Finnley, moving over to Leif. Patching up his wounds. Soul focus. An ability utilized by only gods, higher beings and powerful mages. Kabbu and Vis eyes widened. "Woah what the hell?? How did you do that??" Asked Vi, amazed. "Soul Focus." spoke Leif. "But we believed only higher beings, gods and powerful mages could do something like that.. we did not take you to be any of those things." "S'a long story, again, like I said. But ey. S'th' least I can do after scarin yuhs." Finnley chuckles before healing Kabbu, Vi and Chompy as well. "Thank you kindly Finnley. We should likely introduce ourselves as well come to think.. My name is Kabbu. This is Leif, this is Vi, and this.." he lifts up the chomper plant. "Is Chompy!". Finnley giggles again, stroking Chompys head with his finger. "D'aw! Cutie pie! S'one hell of a murder machine but a cutie pie nontheless." "We agree wholeheartedly." Agreed Leif. After a while of speaking, Finnley gave the group a map of the Outlands, as well as what places to avoid, and a list of hotspots to rest up and stock up before actually making it to a kingdom. "If yer thinkin' uh goin up t'the mountains, ah'd suggest goin t' Xhalyun. Eroanne's nearby Xhalyun too n both 'r cold as hell, but Xhalyun shit is a helluva lot cheaper than Eroanne, closer too." Finishing that thought he handed Kabbu the map, to which he made a delighted squeak of excitement. "Thank you kindly, Finnley. Despite first impressions I am very glad to have run into you!" Leif nods in agreement as Finnley lifts up his bag. "Ain't no problem sir. I wish ya'll luck out there. N hey, maybe if we meet again ya'll can tell me shit bout Bugaria. Been wantin t'head over there myself someday." "Oh you'd love it there! It's a wonderful place.." Finnley nodded, before kneeling down to Vi. "Ay kid, sorry fer scarin' ya." He holds out his hand and Vi raises a brow. "Let's battle again sometime aight?" Vi hesitates for a second before her usual smirk returns to her, placing her hand in his for a handshake. "Abso-goddamn-lutely heheh!! Better be a bigger challenge next time though!!" Finnley gave a great laugh and stood back up again. "You too kiddo! If you ain't gettin better ain't no damn point in it! I'll catch ya'll later uh?" "For certain. Take care." remarked Leif with a smile, as both teams parted ways.

As the towering Vessel took his leave.. he chuckled to himself.. "..Seeker.. Wanderer.. I wish ya'll could come with me when I go t'Bugaria.. I know ya'll'd love diggin' intuh th' place.." "...Maybe one day we will.. I'd love that."  

[zodiyack]

Good Intentions with Bad Outcomes

Requested by anon: Could you write for shelby sis who fights with tommy and in his anger he says something really hurtful to her and she leaves. Tommy doesn't take it seriously cause he thinks she'll be back soon anyways but she stays way a couple weeks because she had to hide from someone? and when she comes back everyone is angry at first till they realize that something's off with her and she tells them later on? With a fluffy family end? Sorry if it's too specific:)

Pairing: Tommy + Shelby!Female!Reader, Shelby & Gray family + Shelby!reader (no romance)

Warnings: Swearing, angst, reader being best friends with Esme that’s a warning and we all know it, fluff, smol sexual reference, mention of homophobia + abuse, mention of blinding; Peaky Edition™, slight straying from request(?)

Taglist:  @matth1w​, @redspaceace​, @simonsbluee​, @peakysputain​

Tags just for this fic: @mzcrazy2​

Masterlist | Peaky Blinders Masterlist

He snapped.

It was just a small argument, at first, but Y/n wouldn’t stop digging. She fought first, he tried to reason with himself, but he knew it was his fault. He was going to apologize, as soon as she dropped the act and came home.

He waited in a chair by the door.

Any moment now. Just a couple seconds and she’d come bursting through the door, admitting her defeat and accepting her brother’s apology, perhaps even apologizing herself.

He checked his pocket watch.

If not now, maybe, and preferably, before 4 am. Tommy grew tired with each passing moment. He knew Pol would kill him if anything happened to Y/n, and he wouldn’t be able to forgive himself either, so he told himself to sit by the front door and wait for her, but sleep just seemed far too important. It was something he didn’t get much, and it wasn’t like he could stop himself.

So he slept on the couch. Like a baby, might he add.

However, his awakening was not as peaceful as his sleep. Polly slapped his leg rather harshly with her glove. Her eyes were beat red and her heart was racing faster than the horses her and her family bet on. “Wake up, you bastard!”

“Whatever seems to be the matter, Pol?” He rubbed his eye sleepily and sat upright, but yet again was attacked by his aunt’s gloves.

“You know damn well what’s the matter!” Tommy gave her a look of confusion. “Your sister is missing, goddammit!”

He chuckled, loudly. His amusement earned him more attacks from the gloves as Polly glared down at him, “What the bloody hell do you think is so funny about Y/n being missing?”

“She’s not missing Pol, she’s too fucking chicken to run. Just, relax, alright Pol? She’ll be back in what, five hours?” Thomas smirked at his aunt before grabbing his coat and walking out the front door. He went on his way, walking back to his own home.

“Tommy! Like I’ve said, he’s just a friend!”

“Yeah? Just a friend? Look at him, he just wants to get in your knickers, Y/n/n!” He laughed with his older and younger brother, watching the boy, their sister’s age, flush red with eyes the size of saucers. He noticed his sister look away, equally embarrassed as her guest. “Is that what you are, huh Y/n? A whore? Look at that brothers, our baby sister’s become a whore!”

Y/n grunted and pushed past them, trying to get out of the room, but Tommy grabbed her arm. His teasing smile was long gone. “Y/n/n. Send. Him. Home.”

“You lost the right to call me that when you called me a whore.”

Weeks had passed. Still no sign of Y/n.

“Fuck you!”

“Fuck you too! Whoring around with some kid-”

“Thomas! I’m not a fucking whore! You may keep your sanity by sneaking around with those women, but I can assure you, brother,” she spat the word with a certain venom to her tone, “none of the whores in the whole bloody fucking world could show you how much of a worthless, sad, piece of shit excuse for a brother you are. Lucky for me,” she leaned in, speaking through clenched teeth, “I’m no whore.”

Y/n grabbed her coat and ran out the door, flipping Tommy off in the process of her exit mission. The shocked expression lazily covered with a horrible attempt of a blank look on Tommy’s face was priceless. He never expected nor meant for it go this far.

That’s when she left. That’s when he laughed to himself and waited by the door, telling himself over and over that she was only kidding around. That she was going to come home.

It had almost been a whole fucking month.

He finally saw the truth.

She was either missing, serious about leaving, or had, as much as he didn’t want to think about it, died. And he was the one who had to break the news to his family. When he did, many different reactions were shared.

Esme, who held a close bond with Y/n, slapped Tommy with small “cat-fight” hits to his arm until John pulled her back. John refused to look at Tommy, full of his own guilt for not stopping the joke before it got too far. Arthur drank his sorrows away, but not before bowing his head in shame as well.

And as for Polly, she gave Thomas a disappointed, disapproving glare and hit his arm, similar to Esme, but with full force, figurative steam coming from her ears accompanied by the tears flowing from her brown orbs. The action spelled it out better than words could’ve. Not that she would’ve said anything about it anyways, as she currently wished to be on something, anything, worse than “not on speaking-terms” with her nephew.

They knew Y/n was at fault as well, but she wasn’t there at that moment, so Tommy was facing his punishment while they had their free time. Esme baked Y/n’s favorite Romani treats, the reasoning quite obvious when Pol and Ada had pointed it out,

“You’re going through a grieving process. She may not have died, for all we know, but you feel that you lost her, and it’s hurting you intensely.”

Some days, Ada joined in, baked her share, and brought them back to her house. Today, however, it was just Esme.

Or so she thought.

The feeling of unease washed over her. A chilly wind blew into the room. She’d had her fair share of the supernatural, but this presence felt alive. Esme’s hand reached for the knife before she spun around, dropping the blade at the sight in front of her.

“Y/n- what the bloody hell...?” Y/n tried to walk over for a hug, but only managed to get half way before Esme snapped back to her senses and hit her friend over and over again with one of her aprons. “Where” hit “Have” hit “You” hit “Been!?”

“Oh you know...exploring.”

“Fucking hell, Y/n, you grew up in Birmingham, in fact, you’re still growing up, here, in Birmingham. So tell me. What’s wrong? If you decide not to tell me, just know that John’s sleeping upstairs, and don’t, for one second, think I won’t go wake his lazy arse up.”

“Oh yeah, sure, Esme, maybe get him to tell Tommy to get that stick out his ass, would you? I mean, it’s got to be painful with how far up there he makes it out to be.”

Esme frowned, remembering what Thomas told them all. “Oh hun... you should’ve told me and came over here! I’m sure John wouldn’t have minded, and if he would’ve... well that’s too bad for him, innit?” Y/n giggled softly and began to smile, causing Esme to cheer with joy. “See! Come, I’ll make you some tea!”

“Well? Where the fuck were you!?” Polly inspected Y/n for injuries, finding bruises along wrists. 

“Nowhere, I’m fine. I just fell into some trouble and, like Arthur taught me, won.”

Arthur chuckled proudly, “Attagir-”

“No. Tell us the truth, Y/n.”

“I am.”

Polly leaned closer to her niece. They held eye contact, Y/n could see the tears threatening to spill over her Aunt’s lower eye lids. She inhaled, preparing to speak, hesitated, to up the dramatic effect, and finally let a word free. “Liar.”

“To be fair Pol, she had been at my home for the past week-”

A gasp and a cough, both from Pol, sounded in the room from shock. “She what?” she drawled.

“My point is, Aunt Pol, my small home, all the little ones, there would be some points where she’d trip, ya know? Even Esme gets some bruises like that-”

“Mhm. It’s totally from the small house.” Arthur chuckled into his cup, snorting when Pol flicked him on the back of his head. “Anyways, she said it Pol, she’s fine. No broken bones, no bloody noses, John gave an explanation for any bruises, she’s fine.”

“I’m with Polly on this one. She didn’t seem all that well at our home, John, and she didn’t run around enough to get bruises. Sorry, love.” She winced apologetically at her sister-in-law.

Y/n shrugged and walked from the room, trying hard to keep the emotions inside. If she didn’t cry, they couldn’t know that she had lied. Not that it was any use, Pol was already onto her and her siblings were giving her suspicious looks.

Tommy followed his younger sister and closed the door behind himself. “Y/n/n. Are you alrig-”

She hugged him, tightly. Thomas could feel his shirt dampening from his sister’s tears. Y/n broke, despite her plan not to, she couldn’t hold it in anymore. Her sobs were painful for Tommy to hear. His protective and brotherly instincts kicked in as he processed the muffled cries of the voice belonging to the girl he watched grow up, the girl cared ever so deeply about, wrapping his arms around her and squeezing her tightly.

“Tommy... I couldn’t help him.”

“Who?” She looked up at him with sad expression. He remembered the night. He called his sister a whore for joking purposes and with the intent of preventing her from ending her night with a broken heart, it didn’t help that he was slightly drunk, and he didn’t realize she’d take it to heart. “I-”

“It’s alright, Tom, you had good intentions, they just didn’t have the best of outcomes.”

“Y/n/n, I shouldn’t have called you that, no matter my intentions.”

She hugged her brother again, both Shelby siblings unaware of the door opening and their audience that stood on the other side of it. “Tommy, you wanna know what happened? I was like you, had good intentions, but a bad outcome.”

“What’s this of bad outcomes?” Pol stepped forward, tears spilling over the brims of her eyes and a small smile upon her lips. Y/n began to cry harder, and Polly wrapped her arms around her after Tommy moved out of the way. She rested her head on Y/n’s and mumbled soft affirmations as her hand moved up and down her back soothingly.

“Tells us what happened, dear, from the start, okay?” Y/n nodded, separating from her aunt and sitting in the middle of her clan, who sat on either the sofa or a chair.

“The boy Tommy assumed was into me, was being abused. I was trying to help, prevent him from being hurt anymore than he already was. His father hated him because he... he likes boys. I figured, if I hung around, his father would think the opposite and leave him alone. But one day he slapped him, right in front of me. I got so mad, I- I- it was like I- like all I could see was red-”

“Deep breath, there’s no rush, little sister.” Arthur rested a hand on Y/n’s shoulder reassuringly, earning a kind and appreciative smile from the girl.

“Thank you, Arthur. I hurt his father, so I wasn’t lying about that part, but he got back up. Illia, the boy, helped me out of his house and ran with me. We got pretty far and ended up staying at a small abandoned cabin, a good place for us while we were in hiding. He managed to find a place with his grandmother out of the UK, who could care less about his romantic or sexual preferences in gender, and that’s when I started for home. We went our separate ways and our hiding was no longer necessary.”

“I have a question.” Ada raised her hand, in attempt of getting her family to notice her. Y/n nodded and awaited her older sister’s question. “If you were free from hiding...why didn’t you come home right away? Why’d you stay with John and Esme for an extra week?”

“Yeah, I’d like to know that too. We all thought you’d died, Y/n.”

“Oh...” She looked down, wiping away some of her tears, “I didn’t want you to get mad at me. Or have Illia hurt due to certain lovely trios attacking before thinking. He didn’t kidnap me, but if I came back after news of him fleeing Britain spread, you’d probably assume such.”

Polly sat beside her niece with a soft smile and pulled her into yet another hug. “It’s good to have you back. You’ve missed so much, and we’ve missed you. What do you say we eat dinner as a family today, celebrate your return?”

Ada walked over and joined the two women, wrapping her arm around Y/n as well.

“Get over here, all of yous. I don’t give a fuck if you don’t want to hug all of us, right now it’s about Y/n-”

“Pol,” Arthur chuckled heartily, “We’re not gonna argue, we missed her too.”

Tommy was first to step up, stopping in front of Y/n. He pulled her into him, welcoming her into a warm hug, then Polly wrapped her other arm around Tommy, Ada mirroring her Aunt. Arthur found a spot, as did Esme and Finn. John muttered something along the lines of “to hell with it” and finally joined in on the family hug.

That night, they celebrated, just as Polly said. The girls exchanged gossip with Y/n about what she had missed, the boys teased her, with lighter jokes this time, and shared the news the girls failed to inform Y/n of. By the end of the night, everyone had passed out in the living room with smiles on their face, adults with alcohol in their stomachs, all apart from Y/n and Tommy.

“Tommy?” He grunted in response to his sister, fidgeting with the glass in his hands. “I’m sorry.”

Tom paused, inhaling slowly. The entire time, he thought she was the own who owed him an apology, at least a small one. But he was the one who said the words. He was the one who watched her leave without chasing after her. “Don’t be. If anyone here should be sorry, it’s me.” He looked over to her, the siblings holding eye contact, “You’re not a whore, okay? I never should’ve said that, even if it was true or not, it wasn’t kind of me. I hurt you because I misread your friend’s intentions and-”

“Good intentions, bad outcome.”

“Y-yeah. But my intentions were not needed, Y/n/n. They were something I should’ve kept to myself, but I did it with Ada too, and now she and I have... well a relationship that’s not as strong as ours.”

“Tommy,” she knew what he was trying to say, “you could never ruin our relationship. We may fight, but at the end of the day, your my big brother.” She moved closer to him. “I look up to you, admire you, shit, I wish I was you sometimes.”

“You don’t want to be me, trust me.”

Y/n laughed. “You’re right, I don’t want to be you. I don’t think having a stick up my ass sounds the most comforting-”

“Oi, watch what you say, Miss Blinder, you’re messing with the rest of the world now.”

He tickled her, but stopped when she held up a hand and made a face. “Wait- Peaky Blinders..?” He nodded. “No- you aren’t- Tommy!” Thomas shushed his sister with a chuckle that matched hers, pure happiness in the Shelby home.

“Yep. You’re a Blinder now, sister.” He raised a shot glass, “May all your good intentions have greater outcomes.”

“No, actually.”

“What?” He stopped his hand before the glass could reach his lips, furrowing his eyebrows in confusion.

She smiled at her brother, raising her own glass, “I prefer the good intentions with bad outcomes, after all, if this is the aftermath of a good intention and it’s bad outcome, I’d be more than happy to make sure all my good deeds had bad endings.”

“Careful there sister, one should be wise about how they phrase such a promise.” 

He didn’t believe in bad luck, nor God, or really anything, for all Y/n knew. That’s what he led others to believe- yet it was like he was warning her about the possibility of bad luck. Beliefs aside, his words were showing a hidden genuine concern to his sister’s.

“I suppose a few good outcomes are acceptable.” They clinked their glasses together and drank their drinks with matching smiles. 

It felt amazing to be back, even better to be back and offered with an opportunity to initiate revenge for Illia. Being a Peaky Blinder had many perks, like the infamous line that was known for being the first thing one hears after losing their sight.

The line that brought motivation to her good intention that could end with a very bad outcome for herself instead of the person she planned it for, had she gone through with it before being presented with the razor dawning cap. The line she’d finally be able to say. The line that could, should, and would be the last thing the evil bastard heard.

Don’t fuck with the Peaky Blinders.

[theoriginalcarnivorousmuffin]

This is a bit random but if characters from your fics lived in the Atla universe what element would they bend? Personally I think Lily would still have all her powers which would result in people thinking she's the avatar even though she's not, Obito would be a firebender, Minato an airbender and Lenin dearest would be a waterbender/bloodbender/maybe the avatar?. This is just the vibe I get tho-

Who needs bullet points when we can do a far too thought out AU that spans multiple fandoms/recursive works that will never happen? 

More to the point, elements in AtLA is a mix of personality (we see earth benders as often brash and stubborn, water benders as adaptive, etc.) but also simply genetics. So, while I get that’s kind of the point of this post, it’s a bit weird to me to assign an element solely on personality. 

So with that, let’s get started.

The Setting

Just to make things fun let’s make our AU take place sometime between Sozin’s first comet and Roku’s death and Aang awakening from that iceberg. The air benders have been wiped out, seemingly with no survivors, the South Pole has been invaded and the water benders from there captured and brought back to the Fire Nation, many of the colonies in the Earth Kingdom have been established, but the North Pole and great cities in the Earth Kingdom still stand.

The Avatar hasn’t been missing for one-hundred years yet, but he’s been missing for decades and people are coming around to the idea that maybe he’s really not going to show up. 

Wizard Lenin/Tom Riddle

In this AU we’ll give Tom Riddle a slightly more traditional shitty background. Since we can’t really have a Tom in the AtLA universe he’s going to have the AtLA generic equivalent name that canon even jokes about: Lee. Lee is the mixed heritage son of a Fire Nation lord and a water bender from the south pole who grows up in a Fire Nation orphanage. And yes, this does happen in the absolute worst way you can possibly imagine, one of the imprisoned water benders from the south pole is raped.

As for Tom (Lee, you get the idea) arriving at an orphanage instead of being imprisoned/taken in as a son, well I’ll leave that to imagination but we can imagine a relatively compassionate guard, a dash of luck, or perhaps someone being an idiot and thinking “oh just dump it in an orphanage, there’s no way it will turn into a water bender too”

So, Tom grows up in an orphanage and looks just a bit... different from everyone else and is clearly not purely from the fire nation. I’m imagining much darker skin (and POC Tom Riddle is the weirdest thing in the world to contemplate, but here we are) and the pale blue eyes.

Tom grows up, dreaming probably of entering the military and winning himself glory, prestige, honor, and clawing out of this impoverished life he was born into. He undoubtedly desperately hopes he’s a fire bender, as not only is it cool but they have the best chance of making it in the world, and probably stays up late for many nights fruitlessly attempting to shoot fire out of his hands.

Unfortunately for Tom, sometime when he’s probably around eight or so, turns out he’s actually a water bender. Naturally, Tom has a huge meltdown and existential crisis as this means something’s terribly terribly wrong. More, all his hopes are ruined, as while a non-bender can make it a bender who is not a fire bender is a foreigner and traitor to the state.

Tom runs away and being a precocious child is able to make it on his own and about the country probably pulling off Toph-like scams. Eventually he runs into a much younger Hama who has just escaped prison and not yet started on her scary old lady adventures of imprisoning random villagers in caves. Hama goes, “of course, yes my child, I knew your mother” and gives Tom the whole horrible rape tale along with “I will teach you everything I know including my scary blood bending”. So Tom learns scary blood bending, probably stays with Hama a few years, and then realizes Hama isn’t going anywhere.

Hama’s content kidnapping random people into caves. At this point, angry and suddenly very pro-water bender Tom wants to murder the Fire Lord and his entire goddamn family and put himself in charge. Go big or go home, am I right?

So Tom leaves, Hama probably saying, “Come back any time, my beautiful murder child” and probably goes exploring the world in search of how the hell he’s going to bring down the Fire Lord. He also probably murders his entire father’s family and steals all his money, but that’s a different story. I imagine he goes to the North Pole where he learns that, as much of a water bender as he is, that he’s the son of someone from the Fire Nation closes pretty much every door to him. He’ll always be an outsider and the North Pole is very frosty towards him.

According to Hama, the South Pole is in shambles, so Tom probably doesn’t even bother going. 

So Tom probably goes and bums around the Earth Kingdom, loitering in Ba Sing Se and Omashu, looking for that damned Spirit Library in the desert, etc. for a good number of years as he works to perfect his water bending and make himself an instrument of death.

And then he meets an alien and everything changes.

Lily

Tom probably manages to wander around the spirit world at one point in his late teens and probably almost gets eaten by something terrifying. While he learns much it’s not really anything useful and is more in the “too cosmic horror for Tom” variety. More than that though, something follows him back out.

When he comes to back in the real world there’s this thing sitting next to him that looks enough like a person but also like someone told a gifted artist what humans look like and they got it mostly right but also went a little nuts. It’s a girl, a few years younger than him, who has flaming red hair, absurdly green eyes, pale skin, and facial features he can’t recognize for the life of him (Lily still looking western in this to up the ante of ‘she’s an alien folks’).

Tom sacrifices his dinner to it and hopes it doesn’t eat him.

It explains that it’s a tourist from another dimension, beyond even the Spirit World, and that it’s come to see what the mortal world is all about. Tom is naturally very weirded out but at this point decides to roll with it.

Except it doesn’t leave and clearly expects Tom to play tour guide.

He does, reluctantly, because he doesn’t want to be eaten but he also sort of gets used to the thing. Then, one day, it starts bending multiple elements with utter ease and Tom is at first flabbergasted and horrified (only to remember that spirits can do what they want and aren’t like lowly mortals who can only bend one element) and then he gets the idea.

The Avatar, lazy bastard that he is (and Tom might be a little more than slightly bitter that he himself is not the Avatar), appears to be MIA and not coming back any time soon. The entire world it seems is waiting for the Avatar to come and save them. But, Tom says to himself, who needs the Avatar when you can just have an Avatar. An Avatar and, of course, her water bending master.

Thus, the scheme is set, Tom will teach this weird alien thing how to a) act like a goddamn human in public and b) water bending and together they will pretend she’s the Avatar and got lost in the spirit world a few decades ago (which accounts for the youthful age and the weird appearance) and use this to gain allies, topple the Fire Nation, and eventually give the throne to Tom.

Lily, who doesn’t know the difference between being a tourist and taking over a nation, goes along but is basically this story’s answer to Uncle Iroh always getting distracted by Pai Sho.

Haru/Dead Last

Given that they’re in the Earth Kingdom, and that Lee picks up water bending insultingly quickly which makes Tom fume in rage, they go to pick up an earth bending master/spread the word that the Avatar has returned from her multiple decades long vacation. 

Along the way they probably run into Haru, who is the world’s most useless excuse for an Earth Bender. As always, he’s so average looking you can barely remember what he looks like beyond “generic earth bender”. 

They probably watch him for two seconds, Lily asks if this is it, and Tom Riddle says, “what a joke”. 

Minato Namikaze

Given that all the air benders are dead we’re going to make Minato a very talented earth bender (it is also very weird to imagine a dark haired/dark eyed Minato, but I suppose we’re going to roll with it). This also, to me, does fit his personality a little better as while he is a leaf on the wind kind of guy he also does dig his heels in and get very stubborn now and then.

Minato’s young, younger than Tom (Lee), but he’s incredibly talented and clever. To keep his shinobi background mostly in tact I imagine that Minato is a swiftly rising member of the Dai Li, stationed in Ba Sing Se, but who occasionally goes on intelligence missions to the other feudal powers in the Earth Kingdom.

So I imagine Lily and Tom run into him unnervingly frequently, probably first meeting him off duty in Omashu where he does his “extremely polite and friendly local guide” routine to show the pair the city (never mind that Tom insists he’s been to Omashu plenty of times goddammit). Despite this, Lily and Minato become friends, Lily easily confessing she’s the Avatar (which Minato at first thinks is a joke, even if she looks strange, then goes ‘oh my god, it’s not a joke). 

Eventually Minato is stationed to spy on them under the guise of teaching Lily earth bending. So he joins the gang. Tom, who knows exactly what’s going on, is not amused while Lily is just happy to collect another friend who will actually play Pai Sho with her. 

Kushina Uzumaki

Kushina is a earth bender, hands down. I debated making her a water bender (because whirlpool) but that personality is just pure earth bender material. Besides, I can just picture her so easily coming from Kyoshi. 

So Kushina’s an earth bending Kyoshi warrior, who while ten times as powerful as Minato, also lacks any of his control or cleverness. Kushina has undoubtedly left Kyoshi, abandoning their neutrality, to join the war and kick some fire bender ass.

She does this but along the way frequently runs into the gang where she annoys the ever loving shit out of Minato (her new rival) and claims that Avatar Lily is her new idol.

Rabbit

Rabbit is a mysterious spirit from Lily’s past that she refuses to talk about except in the darkest of terms promising doom and destruction the likes of which the world has never seen.

No one knows how to react to this. Or what a plain old ‘rabbit’ even is.

Tobirama Senju

Because no story’s not complete without Tobirama, I imagine he’s a stuffy waterbender and scholar from the North Pole who Tom is miffed at as the man refused to teach him even more water bending. Tobirama naturally feels that the day he teaches a blatant spy is the day he goes and drowns himself. 

Later, when Tom has picked up the Avatar and Tom rubs it in his face, Tobirama probably reluctantly spends a day or so teaching them something/fighting off the hordes of Fire Nation soldiers on their tale (it’s not Avatar if the gang isn’t constantly chased by fire benders).

Obito Uchiha

Obito is the answer to a fire bending instructor. Obito’s a firebender and the youngest son of a wealthy Fire Nation lord. However, Obito’s the black sheep of the family that everyone hates, a late bloomer when it comes to his bending, and is seen as bringing dishonor on the family.

Itching to prove himself, Obito becomes a soldier and goes to the Earth Kingdom, and eventually decides the best way to earn recognition and restore his honor is to capture the newly resurrected Avatar. Congratulations, Obito, you’re this story’s Zuko. 

Obito, while not the most talented fire bender at first (though as he gets older he gets dangerously good at it) is extremely clever and becomes the largest threat to the gang. 

That said, Obito actually does grow to like Lily quite a bit and begins to realize honor doesn’t actually mean that much to him and he doesn’t even really like his family. He doesn’t even dislike the concept of the Avatar and thinks the world probably does need one right about now.

So after a whole bunch of chasing them around the globe, thinking about his family, and being forced to almost kill the Avatar now and then he eventually defects and volunteers himself as fire bending instructor.

This is met with suspicion on all sides but he and Lily are bros so he wins.

Avatar Roku

Needing to pick up air bending, Lily probably fakes it until she makes it for a while, but eventually runs into Avatar Roku’s wandering spirit taking vacation from an ice cube.

He’s alarmed, but Aang’s trapped in ice, so if someone’s going to substitute then great.

To everyone else it just looks like Lily’s constantly talking to herself, playing Pai Sho with herself, and miraculously picks up air bending out of absolutely nowhere.

Also anyone close to Lee probably figures out she’s not really human/the avatar at this point, but they’ll take what they can get.

And This All Results In

Lily learns all the elements, there’s probably some big battle, then Lily gives some ridiculous speech about world peace that has nothing to do with anything and while the Fire Nation is defeated, Tom is not in fact made Fire Lord and remains merely the Avatar’s humble water bending instructor.

Instead, if he’s alive at this point, the crown goes to Iroh and he’s given a council of angry Earth Kingdom people who tell him to behave or else. We can give Iroh niceish things sometimes. That, or, hilariously, Obito becomes hokage/Fire Lord being distantly in line for the throne and doesn’t even know how that happened or what his life even is right now.

The colonies are the same mess in canon so something like Republic City probably eventually comes about.

Still, there’s peace, and probably statues to the gang all over the Earth Kingdom and Water Tribes (while the Fire Nation grumbles and remembers the good old days when they controlled the world). 

And then Aang eventually wakes up extremely confused and confronts Avatar Lily noting, “Hey, I’m the actual Avatar” and Lily after a suspiciously blank pause explains, “I said an Avatar, never said I was the Avatar”

So, that’s that. If anyone wants other specific characters added into this mess feel free to comment. 

[towerofgodscreamblogwink]

reading last chap of s2 after covering several chapters yesterday, also since it's end of the season, for once I put some bigger serious thoughts at the end

who the FUCK ARE YOU PEOPLE???

OH MY GOD KARAKA IS TSUNDERE

there are OTHER slayers?? (except fucking ex white)  if they mentioned it earlier i must’ve forgot

that’s not how to talk to your daddy greatest

 -(no i don’t like jahad i’m here to bully karaka because i tend to bully my faves)

*punches table* rabbit boy. get out. i have not sighed so loud in my entire life

oh i see why people were calling them furries.

listen, you either give us catboys or leave.

please don’t say “creatures” if it’s like your furry way of talking

that guy: not to worry he has a permit

gustang: *pulls out paper* “i can get whatever i want”

i’ve read “gremlin” im dONE

you know what maybe i should just go to bed rn

also cat is destroying my door dear lord

ok so it’s the next day now

“ahahaha”

“I can’t read...”

SHIT I HAVEN’T NOTICED RACHEL GOT TELEPORTED

erh i’m dumb on this one, why have they made this parallels?

I don’t want to tell you this but he just reminded me of chara undertale...

wangan: onii-chan!?

wait what

ouch

soooo karaka believes wangan’s story even w/o ring then?

*spits tea* ow goddammit not the feels

anyhoo that’s the end of s2, siu put a note about break but yeah that was years ago, so pretty sure i’ll be starting s3 even now but i won’t be posting it rn

anyhoo well that was suprisingly long season? my usual knowledge of “Seasons” is usually from anime, and these tend to have seasons with usual 2 or 3 arcs but they usually don’t go in so many different directions 

personally it feels like half of season 2 is a season on it’s own tbh, and maybe that’s how anime could adapt it, perhaps? although 12 episodes would work best with just setting on saving bam from fug.. either anime would make the seasons in parts like aot did with s3 or have lots and lots of seasons, since probability of anime getting 24 episodes has gotten awfully small those years

As for the opinions on season 2... I see first half and season on it’s own, so let’s start from this - Bam getting rescued, and first time they enter hell train. First of all, Bam as Viole is absolutely nailing this, and I wouldn’t mind having Viole as protagonist to be honest, although it would be indeed sad as Viole is not the happiest person, but damn is he a cutie. Is he a baby. 

Wangan - oh dear I dunno if others saw the plot twist coming, but I did not - I have absolutely been viewing him as Bam’s counterpart to his Viole side, just a complete shounen protagonist who’s completely ordinary. Boy was I w ro n g. I only remember vaguely being sus about him when Viole has mentioned his ring, but that was about it, as it was never mentioned again, I forgot about it. And then it appeared Karaka has this ring. Boy was I shooketh.

I don’t think I exactly liked the further progression though until Wangan’s story was revealed - until then he kinda fell into background, and then soon again as said story was revealed. However I do know Siu has big plans with him, and at this point I know Siu’s writing enough, so I don’t have much worries about his further progression

Also sadly there was no Karaka-Wangan brother bonding

Next in mind I have Khun, naturally, as he’s my icy hot favourite. I don’t really know why even, when I saw him in anime I was quite indifferent about him. So if you want me to explain why do I like khun, I can’t really explain. Other than when he was becoming my favourite, I remember being dissappointed in myself and making a post to myself “Goddammit don’t fall for him just because he’s your type” and he’s not even really my type in terms of personality, but at that point I was jsut shrugging it off, maybe it was his childish over-dramatic posture contrasting his cold personality because I just hit that protect button

Also yes I may be basic just slap me already

And before I’ll start talking: girl’s scout outfit, really? I support my son and I can understand his edgy and k-pop fashion... But I’d be lying if I said I understood him for shit at that moment

So now that we’re past back... I was actually recently re-reading first chapters, and damn, the difference of Khun before Bam was rescued - was rather intriguing. He was laughing his ass off at silly things (his team being dressed silly) but oh sweetie did it feel weird.

Next, I keep thinking about him on the train obliberating Rachel - despite popular opinion, his cockiness was actually getting on my nerves, and only thing saving it, was his reasons were Bam - so in other words, at least he wasn’t an asshat for his own sake.

I much liked his personality during second half of the season 2 - as much as there wasn’t much khunbam content - seems like Khun has grown as a person,as his cocky aura much disappeared as he became more understanding towards his own weaknesses. Now his “cockiness” became rather entertaining if you catch my drift, because despite his jerk nature, he *is* well aware of his flaws, and I just like that. Not that he *wasn’t* considerate of that already, but the hidden floor really did wonders on him.

And dear my, his relationship with Bam. I’ll be honest, at some point during reading first half of season 2, I felt like I was reading romance story between him and Bam. It was all the little things, like playing with Rachel just to know Bam’s past, Khun noticing Bam was uncomfortable with Viole wig, Khun being near Bam as he spoke he has no reasons to live, Khun standing up for Bam when strangers tried to use him and Isu asked for his help but skipped the asking part, Khun looking back to Bam telling him he’ll be back when going to catch the fish on train, Khun trying to talk to him when Bam locked himself up in his room on train, constantly checking and finally waiting in his room when he notices Bam is gone, Khun noticing lack of Bam’s presence before going to floor of death right *after* he just said he feels like world is ending if Bam isn’t here, and then beeming when Bam does in fact appears. And that’s just all the stuff I can remember right now, and I mean the *little* things. The big things are the ones we know well - “So that I can always chase” and the famous world one I don’t have to quote.

Second half didn’t have much scenes, but there were few that did stuck to me - Bam’s line to Kiseia how he understands why she hates him, but he’ll do everything he can to stop her if she plans to harm Khun *again*. Because it seemed like Bam kind of moved on from Khun getting stabbed by his sis, but that panel did show that not only it *did* stay with him, it also stayed with him that it was *Kiseia* who hurt him.

Another scene was the one I don’t think I need to talk about much, as we all pretty understand - moment of Khun and Eduan awkward father-son bonding. Khun tries to close himself off, but Bam reaches out, and forces him out of comfort zone

But what mostly stuck out to me, was his behaviour after Khun became kinda dead. It was the way he spoke to endorsi and rest, how *he’s* going to take khun and follow the *harder* path, and anyone who *don’t want to come*, can take the easier one. Basically, he was prepared to go the harder route completely alone because it meant taking Khun with him, and he was just, prepared to go without any help, he only optionally added that others can join if they *want* to.

Another interesting scene, was Hwaryun calling him out, when few of his teammates has been captured, due to them taking the different path from Bam - but if they are meant to escape with Khun, they have to leave them, and when Bam gets steamy about it, Hwaryun goes - “I didn’t choose the teams. You’ve chosen them based on who matters more.” It’s so subtle, so cruel, yet intriguing - one of the most worst way to tell someone he cares for someone else more - she’s only saying Khun mattered to him more, but in this context, it sounds accusing, making Bam’s decision selfish. And that’s something that’s absolutely in my mind - his care for Khun, called out in “accusing” matter - as something that stopped him from commiting other decision - as something he’s willing to priotize others over.

So I can’t stop thinking about that, and truthfully? That last “take care of Khun after me.” line.

But the other line from bam’s monolouge that gets me is “Wait a bit more Khun... I’ll wake you up again.” That “again” gets to me, but I can’t really explain it. Maybe it’s the way he looks at Khun longily. 

So this covers their relationship, and I think I’m only gonna mention Bam now real quick and perhaps Eudan and Jahad, because the post’s getting long and I don’t want to make *this* post specifically long.

I don’t have much to say about Bam, as Bam himself doesn’t have much to say about him. He didn’t have much definying features or characteristics besides the time he was Viole, but you have to hand it to him for growing after meeting after she pushed him for the first time - it was still hard to say anything about him though. For several chapters later - as well, except he did manage to develop the traits of self-sacriface, and actual resolve to save everyone - because he talks about *always* and sure fights for his friends, but who doesn’t? Where his personality shines in this regard, is in the moment of Bam saving his enemies with no questions asked, and White by the way definetely helped Bam to develop his personality for sure.

But either way I’m here roasting Bam, while my goal was to say, that it was in the hidden floor where I’ve actually started recognizing him as his own character - it was in the moment of him having final confrontation with Viole, I finally saw what kind of person he was. And I liked it, he became a solid character in that moment, accompanied by proper flashbacks and exploration. And Bam continues to be then written quite consinstely as in one of later flashbacks, he indeed says, what he said to Viole a while ago - he’s afraid of being alone. Not only that, the internal conflict was added - is he a monster? is he not? It’s simple conflict but can do wonders, and it’s not something that Bam even thinks about, it’s more of a really subtle conflict within a character design itself, rather than Bam.

So basically now Bam indeed feels more of an actual character

And before I’ll end it for now, I want to mention the meeting of young Eudan, andyoung Jahad - truth to be told, I don’t have most unique feelings towards them as anyone sees the point - the adventures with pure intentions turned evil, aka how everyone can turn evil. What makes me more interested, is how Siu has used it for storytelling... Main characters having a big meeting with the younger versions of villians? Haven’t seen that one yet, so I’m interested what direction Siu will take with it, since this is my first time seeing it, so I’m really curious how exactly you can utilize such scenes in terms of long planned story, and not only how they affect story as a whole, but how they also affect just aspects of it as well.

So, that’d be it on my commentary and small “opinion” on season 2. It wasn’t like I exactly wanted  to put it here, but I wanted the end of season 2 to have more meaning to myself. But not only to have a meaning to myself *just* for my own reasons, but because I didn’t want to leave the whole season with nothing but small comments there and there. I wanted my experience altogether to be something bigger - but not only experience, but my “legacy” as well. So, that’d be about it x2, if you’re still reading, congratulations, I appreciate that, and you get an apple

[highqueenofelfhame]

acowar reread thread

so i think i’ll update this post every few chapters unless anything super major happens that i want to immediately react to, that way you get my commentary but i’m not totally flooding and flooding and flooding your feed with a super super long post. i think i’m going to edit it under the cut and reblog it every time it gets updated and i’ll also number every update so it’s easy to find where i left off. if you guys prefer the other way i’ll transition back to the other way for acofas.) this is super fun i’ll start doing this for more books if you’re interested, including books i read for the first time. (after acofas, crescent city is next and it’ll be my first time reading it!)

UPDATES UNDER THE CUT.

1) chapters 1-5 I’ve read up through chapter five and so far my favorite thing is just how DONE feyre is with literally everyone in the spring court. the amount of times she’s had to like look away and not roll her eyes is just hilarious, her dry inner monologue, she just made a comment about having to remind herself to laugh and not strangle tamlin while they were dancing at the summer solstice and it just is so funny to me. 

i miss rhys. but the few times they’ve spoken through the bond is enough to tide me over. he told her he loved her once and i sighed out loud. i’m such trash for this bitch. 

feyre hijacking the summer solstice ceremony is COMEDIC GOLD. like you kNOW ianthe was fuming and furious and trying to save face the best she could but like hats off to feyre man. her character development from book one to where we’re at in book three is fantastic. she’s not a simpering little girl anymore, she’s a bad bitch and she kNOWS she’s a bad bitch and it’s just.. fucking great. 

i also, as much as i don’t want to, feel for lucien A LOT. i think a lot of his behavior is heavily influenced by how he’s been treated by tamlin for most of his life and i feel genuine remorse from him and the fact that he can like tell something is up but isn’t saying anything just shows, to me anyway, how much remorse he’s genuinely feeling. 

also alis knowing that something is up is just a testament to how attentive she is as a faerie and a friend and i really love that about her.

“I was the nightmare” YAS BITCH. FUCKIN YAASSS.

2) chapters 6-10 feyre is so goddamn clever. the entire time she’s bringing down the spring court she’s witty and fierce and clever and really just iS THAT BITCH, HUH? 

i don’t like jurian but the fact that he still has compassion within himself for his kind despite being literally insane for being just AWAKE and aware for like 500 years is... nice and pleasantly surprising because i feel like you wouldn’t think that of him being that he’s siding with hybern so that he thanked feyre when she tried to get the children of the blessed out of there... i don’t know why i’m bringing this up, it’s just something that stuck out to me and that jurian also vouches (to feyre) about rhysand’s character and how decent of a person he found him to be. it’s just very interesting and i feel like speaks leaps and bounds about rhysand as a person. 

feyre pushing tamlin to explode again... just CHEF KISS. like she really thought of everything. she thought of everything to internally make his sentries doubt him and then completely hate them by orchestrating the ianthe vs sentry debacle. she made herself seem very compassionate and kind and and showed tamlin and ianthe for what they were by doing genuinely so little. like all she did was make them show their true colors on their own and it didn’t take tOO much manipulation. idk feyre is just incredible in the spring court. 

forcing ianthe to hurt herself and molding her mind to make her think she’s always afraid is so much better than just outright killing her.. (if i remember from my last read, it doesn’t hold up, but the thought is there and it’s genius) I also think that this shows a lot about feyre and her character because despite everything she couldn’t just leave lucien alone with ianthe and the unwanted advances. she stayed and fought for her friend (and by extension her mate) even when lucien wouldn’t really fight for her and so feyre is just a fuckin real one like... she’s the kind of friend that you want in your corner. 

killing the hybern twins: glorious. such badassery from lucien and feyre both. 

and i think it’s nice that she let lucien come along with her on her journey back to the night court despite maybe not wanting to but i also think that she knew if she left him behind he could get in serious trouble or wind up dead and so again, i think it says a lot about her character as a person. 

3) chapters 11-15 i’m kind of reading and recapping every 50 pages or so which typically ends up being 4-5 chapters and it’s a good system so far so we’re gonna keep it up! 

the first thing of like, real substance to comment on is lucien saying his father will kill feyre for wielding his power but feyre just responding with “he can get in line.” like her sass is sO GOOD In this book, especially in the spring court chapters.

uhhh big fuck you to eris, i don’t know why people want him to have a redemption arc, he is literally a fat sack of shit that deserves to burn and i’m not sorry for saying so. he’s abusive and cruel and doesn’t deserve like, anything at all. although i will say good on him for balking a bit when feyre revealed she’s high lady. 

CASSIAN AND AZRIEL SUPERHERO LANDING ON THE ICE AND KICKING ASS!! I remember vividly the relief i felt when cassian showed up and was able to fly and i still felt so much victory when it happened again. it’s one of my favorite moments of the book so far and just really gets me. also feyre just dropping the “I’m high lady of the night court” bomb is DELICIOUS and i can’t get enough. i read it like six times. because you know as soon as the illyrians yielded to her that the autumn bitches were like “shit.”

“My love.” kILLS ME. you guys, i’ve only read this book once but i’ve reread their reuniting multiple times because it’s just so soft. rhys is so goddamn soft. he loves her so fucking much. i want rhys to call me my love and lick my tears away. goddamn. 

something i think about a lot is how in acotar when tamlin had feyre alone after months of torture he just tried to fuck her despite knowing things weren’t safe. however, knowing she was home and safe, rhys didn’t try for that immediately. like yes, they kissed, but there was so much conversation before they fucked that it just, says a lot about their relationship. tamlin also always demanded to know everything about feyre’s visits as soon as she was back, not even bothering to kiss her hello but rhys was like ‘that shit can wait’ AND THEY’RE ABOUT TO GO TO WAR. rhys loves her so wholly that he wanted to make sure she was okay before he ever bothered to ask about the spring court and how everything unfolded the last few weeks. idk i’m trash for rhysand, y’all. let’s make that a shirt.

the way that rhys threatens lucien, “i won’t bother to explain it again, and i will rip out your fucking throat.” is so sexy. like how casual it was, so sexy.#ripmythroatoutrhysand

amren being a bedtime story but irl is just a cranky aunt lmao.

nesta’s ferocity is, yes, frustrating, but also so heartbreaking to me. for a very long time i had a really rough relationship with my sister and i can see my own sister in nesta (who, by the way, would murder me if she found out i said this so, kara, if u see this, i love u endlessly and i love nesta with my whole heart) especially nesta’s behavior more so in acofas which i’ll talk more about when we get there. but i just, i feel for her man. she’s been traumatized and life as she knows it has been ripped away from her and some people respond to trauma with bite. and i know it doesn’t make it right or okay but it still just makes me feel for her.

cassian and nesta’s banter just gODDAMMIT SLAYS ME. i cannot wait for an entire fucking book of this shit and an entire book of their back and forth. i think nesta loves him and doesn’t know what to do with it because she’s scared so she’s acting like a cornered animal. like nesta is a snake that will strike when cornered and threatened and i just god i can’t wait for their book. 

elain... broke my heart a lot more than i remembered. as someone in the midst of my worst depression i find myself able to relate to that hollow and empty feeling like...all too well and it struck a cord and i almost cried at how empty she was. 

4) chapters 16-29 there is the whole meeting at amren’s apartment and cassian defends nesta, saying that he understands her actions, her snark, why she is the way she is, and it just honestly reinforces my love for cassian. i don’t have much to say about it but that i just really love the respect that he has for others. more cassian things: feyre brings up again how even broken and literally bleeding out and on the ground with his wings completely shredded he was still crawling toward nesta and reaching for her and trying to get to her. “because i can’t stay away.” fucking cracks my heart open every time. 

i love everything about the first family dinner back together. i love all the banter, i love that nesta sat in and even contributed to dinner conversation a little bit. lucien being so uncertain of the dynamic is hilarious. amren like opening herself up in a way to nesta and telling her that they’re the same, and to make sure her eruption is felt across worlds, i love it. i’m marking a lot more from amren than i thought i would. cassian at one point, he points to az and says “don’t try to blend into the shadows” and it actually made me chuckle to myself because hE DOES THAT. and it’s funny that cassian calls him on it. 

i don’t think nesta gets enough credit (for like anything, we all been knew i’m a slut for her and stan her with my life) but even as broken and angry as she was she did still offer to help explore magic that she doesn’t want and got as a result of trauma so that she can try to help. she isn’t completely useless. and i like that she has backbone and isn’t just a pushover little bitch. (that isn’t directed toward elain. like i previously mentioned, i’m finding that i relate a lot to her in her current state.) i just mean that i’m glad she sticks up for herself and doesn’t just like, do what people tell her to do. ya know?

rhys being so open to feyre pushing back on him about things like, again man. tamlin erupted and got angry, rhys is like “hell, i deserved it.” just, the differences in their relationships and the toxicity that comes from tamlin and the devotion rhys has for feyre is (say it with me) DELICIOUS.

i also like that just because feyre is high lady that the IC doesn’t just like flop over and bend down and take shit (i’m looking at you, spring court.) like cassian isn’t afraid to be like “you pissed me off by sacrificing yourself.” because he cares. LIKE, AGAIN WITH HIS DEVOTION. his loyalty is just so pure. it isn’t blind but it is pure and i just, god i love it. 

also everyone forgets that azriel has a dry ass sense of humor and i don’t see any of y’all writing it into your fics. “In order to fly, you’ll need wings” he said drily. IT’S DELICIOUS. dry humor is some of the best. and i like that feyre is learning more and getting to spend more time with him. 

5) chapter 20-27 this one will be a bit of a dump because i accidentally read too much today so far to try to catch up from my lack of reading yesterday so... oops. 

“Let’s see what names you call me when my head is between your legs, Feyre darling.” ugh. i wish a mans would say that to me. not really. i wish rhys would say that to me and only rhys. maybe rowan. or aaron warner. or cassian. or -- you get it. 

amren is SO FUCKING FUNNY without doing it on purpose. like genuinely hilarious. “she’s fine. stubborn as an ass, but as you’re related, i’m not surprised.” rOAST THEM. also amren makes nesta almost smile and she makes her laugh all in the span of like ten seconds AND nesta almost smiles when amren brings up cassian. coincidencE? i tHINK NOT.

again with rhys soothing her nightmares. like god it’s so good i dont even have to say anything else abt it.

feyre realizing that the bone carver is her and rhysand’s son. SO GOOD. like SERIOUSLY SO GOOD. and this doesn’t matter at all rn but i think that rhysand’s son has the potential to be more powerful than even him but that’s a thing to get into for another time.

EVERYTHING THE BONE CARVER SAYS ABOUT NESTA. also that it’s directed at cassian is very interesting and i think the bone carver knows they’re mates. like i wonder if cassian is seeing what feyre sees: his own son. WOULDN’T THAT BE INTERESTING. “How she calls to you.” also the comment about “what did you wake that day in hybern, prince of bastards?” what did cassian wake. the wording here is interesting and i have... a lot of questions. does anyone else just also really fucking enjoy the bone carver as a character? like he’s excellent i’ve never read anything quite like him.

“nothing about nesta could frighten me” UGH MY NESSIAN HEART CAN’T FUCKING TAKE IT.

also cassian stepping it later when nesta is furious with rhysand about the flying. like, one when he sighs and says she’ll never fly again is just... funny and adorable but how nesta was charging for rhys and he casually stepped in front of her and he talked her down. “It was amren’s fault, of course, but no one believed me. and no on dare banish her.” like just babbling a bit to bring her back down to earth. absolutely fascinating and delicious that it worked, wouldn’t you agree? ;)

court of nightmares is always a pleasure. fuck eris. 

also later at the town house when amren and mor and rhys are kinda going at it a bit and cassian gets nesta’s attention and nesta sidles over to him without questioning it... like. god if they aren’t endgame i’ll never read an SJM book ever again and i wholeheartedly mean that.

so i’ve seen the posts about amren being an angel i’m not sure if you guys have but yeah i think that’s a really solid theory. i think she very well could be a biblical angel because she mentioned that according to some they were perfect, that they laid waste to twin cities (sodom & gamorrah if this theory is correct) and she also mentioned yielding her grace and that she would fall. she also says she was a messenger and soldier assassin for a wrathful god ruling a young world and all of that, in my opinion, lines up with a lot of what is in the bible and what christians believe to be true. so i really really like this theory, i doubt it will ever be outright confirmed, but i think this is going to be my canon tbh. 

elain is.... out of her mind. it’s fucking weird everything she says is so cryptic and odd. like it’s just weird. i don’t think she’s insane and i can’t remember exactly where elain’s storyline goes in this book but like... rn it’s just weird and cryptic and a little unsettling and also interesting that she only really responds directly to azriel because everyone else she kinda ignores but she talks to him. interesting. 

6) chapters 28-49 clearly i accidentally read A LOT so we have a lOT Of ground to cover. 

NESTA WAS TOTALLY CHECKING CASSIAN OUT AND THAT’S ALL I HAVE TO SAY ABOUT THAT.

azriel has fucking jokes, man. page 303 (hardcover us edition)  “That pine tree wasn’t there a moment ago.” “Judging by its size, i’d say it’s been there for ... two hundred years at least.” feyre even notes that he has a dry sense of humor and it comes out more when they’re alone. i can’t get enough of it. i wish he talked more. 

“Cassian finished the muffin, licking his fingers. I could have sworn nesta watched the entire thing with a sidelong glance. He grinned at her as if he knew it too.” i just love nessian so much i’m going to point out all of their cute reactions this is turning more into a nessian reaction thread SUE ME.

I think that nesta has a lot of regret and guilt over her life.over how she treated feyre because it comes out when nesta brings up to feyre that she didn’t know she couldn’t read (and again at the high lords meeting when she says they would have starved if it wasn’t for her.) i think she feels deeply and just doesn’t know what to do with it, doesn’t know how to express it. 

When they almost get taken in the library, and cassian gets there and nesta “launches herself at him.” my heart. she was scared and she didn’t care she was just so relieved. like fuck me up that’s the shit i like.

nesta asking where cassian is the moment they get back from the battle in adriata and she was worried and scared for him. later when she does see him i think this is when the mating bond clicks into place. it’s page 398 and she says “You didn’t come to -” and then cuts herself off. they have a really fucking intense moment. cassian takes her hand and laces their fingers and they don’t really say anything for a beat until he says “Next time, emissary, i’ll come say hello.” but his voice is low and rough when he says it. “The world seemed to go utterly still at that interrupted sentence, nothing and no one more so than cassian.” i think this is when it clicks for him. maybe not for nesta but definitely for cassian. 

RHYSAND RIPPING TAMLIN’S ABILITY TO SPEAK AWAY LIKE YES WE STAN A MOTHERFUCKING KING. fuck tamlin. fuck eris. and fuck beron. also nesta defending cassian in the high lords meeting (page 438, because beron calls him a bastard.) again, i’m just saying, she’s defending her fucking mate i can’t deal. feyre also exploding in the meeting and rhys just being like “You’ve proved your point, my love.” SO DELICIOUS. “I made her high lady because i love her. her power was the last thing i considered.” like fucking hELL that is how you treat your woman.

after the meeting, helion being like “You handing eris’s ass to him will be my new fantasy at night, by the way.” DELICIOUS. fucking hilarious. 10/10 recommend helion as a high lord and a mans we love to see it. 

also cassian being so concerned when nesta starts to have that feeling about the cauldron being used before the wall gets shattered.he didn’t doubt her feelings for a second, i mean no one did, but he was completely unyielding when he sensed her fear and immediately looked for any sign of an immediate threat.

nesta saying she’s never worn pants and cassian saying “i have no doubt you’d start a riot if you did.” he’s thinking bout that ass. also cassian giving her a quick lesson in defense before they yeet off to the human lands to see graysen and his family. IDK I REALLY LOVE NESSIAN OKAY?!

7) chapter 50-the end. i accidentally finished the book. oops. 

super intersted in nesta’s powers and if she is a witch. i can’t remember acofas at all and if nesta’s powers manifest in that book but i’m eager to see if the fracturing of the cauldron didn’t effect whatever powers she took from it. i think that could also be part of what ultimately is wrong with her on top of all the trauma. 

nesta helping cassian after that first battle when his wrist is hurt. she didn’t take no for an answer and helped him and it was just really soft until mor showed up and cassian pulled his hand away. i’m conflicted about what it means to be totally honest. what it means for his feelings for nesta and what it means where mor is concerned. i don’t love how morrigan treats nesta and cassian’s... relationship? but i don’t dislike mor. i think she’s dealing and coping and has her reasons that we will likely find out about. 

“Only you can decide what breaks you” is something i’d like to get tattooed. i dont really have anything else to add to it. 

i was sobbing during rhys’s battle speech to everyone. i dont rlly have anything else to say about it other than i’m emo. 

nesta saving cassian. again i don’t have shit to say about it other than like it makes me so emotional.  she just started blinding screaming, hoping that he would come. i can’t even begin to think what his death would have done to her.

the bone carver smiling at feyre before he did hits a very specific piece of my heart and i’m not sure why or what but i had chills all over my body. 

cassian telling rhys to let him return the favor/repay the debt. HURT. another thing i cried over. like shut the fuck cassian AIN’T NOBODY DYIN TODAY. 

tHE Nessian moment to end all nessian moments when they would die together. like big fucking wow. you can’t tell me they’re not mates. that they don’t love each other despite how complicated all of it is. like cassian is so soft in the most unique way for her because he knows she bites and he lets her and he bites back and i just think it’s what he needs.

“tell the high lord to leave out a cup for me” AMREN SHUT UP. like fucking christ i teared up then too because i really really love her character. she’s unique and funny and dry and cranky and i just love her so much. 

i’m tired of rhys sacrificing himself. there, i said it. i cried like a fucking baby and of course he woke up being a snarky little shit.

i love the end of this book. i don’t know what i’ll do with myself until january when the next one comes out. i’ll probably go back to the other format for my next read through because it’s easier and less longwinded and i think you guys liked the other way better. anywho, thank you for coming along on this lil journey!!

[malepresentingleg]

is it 2013 again? cause i have a rant about teen wolf coming and i feel 16 y/o.

so due to dome heavy procrastination I've consumed a lot of teen wolf content, i skipped a bunch of episodes and a lot of scenes in the ones i haven't but i still have some Thoughts TM

it's good??? i had a Good Time watching, it was funny but intense and dark and i felt Feelings watching, some of the plotlines were meh (or maybe i just skipped them heh) but a lot were interesting and i loved the characters and their interaction

scott. my sweetheart. my baby. such a cutiepie, such a great protagonist 10/10 i love him and would die for him. he's so pure and cute and his little smile melts my heart. i love how he's fundamentally Human no matter how non human he is. he's a great character all around and i kinda wish they didn't do that shit to him at the end (imma get there) or treated him like he ISN'T the protagonist for such big parts of the shows

people KNOW. Stiles knows from day one, allison finds out soon, his mom finds out in season 2! the sheriff in 3, and they just become part of the gang and can help them with stuff bc they UNDERSTAND. shows like that get really tiring when the teens constantly lie to everyone around them and it was very refreshing. the running gag with the coach ruining things tho was funny and I'm ok with it.

Ok this is mellisa appreciation time. she's SUCH a great, complex and unusual mom-of-hero character. i absolutely love her and her attitude, i love how she's not simply being used as a tool to cause scott pain (just.. sometimes) and their relationship is parenting goals.

also isn't it fucking hilarious how she's a nurse but she just knows everything medical. she's also a surgeon and a mortician and a doctor. ik it's for plot reasons but it funny af.

in general women on the show.. had a lot of potential, i love them, but i hate how they were treated.

allison was all around great imo, her and scott's relationship was built very well and was two sided from the start (unlike... yeah), she has emotions, she's smart and brave, but also human and scared, she kicks ass and, again, exists outside of Scott's GF status (mostly). andddd they killed her. idk if the actress had to/wanted to leave or it was a pure writers decision bc they needed to keep just her father or something, but that would have been ok if not for all the other things

we have 3 main kickass ladies with powers- lydia, kira and malia. lydia spent close to FIVE whole seasons not knowing anything about her abilities/not knowing how to control them. cmon, it gets old. scott masters his powers after a season or two (and had control a lot sooner), parrish finds out what he is like half a season after it becomes relevant etc.

malia- do i need to explain? she was CONSTANTLY struggling controlling her abilities, no matter how badass she supposedly was. and kira oh boy, they did her dirty, didn't they?

kira was such a cute adorable character. i loved her and her little crush on scott and wanting to make friends and being freaked out about relationships, i love her discovering her past and heritage and learning to fight and gaining control and becoming a badass. but. what? they just undid all this? oh no the fox is taking over she has no control no agency of her own she needs to disappear for years now bye :( again, idk if the actress needed to leave but it was so unsatisfying and was insulting to the character. she wasn't even mentioned later a bunch like allison was, just they needed her mom for a plot tool and didn't even acknowledge it was her sword they were breaking. uhm rude?

LET WOMEN HAVE POWERS AND BE AWESOME WITH THEM. and not just minor/bad characters thanks.

i love the concept of a pack on the show and how you don't have to be a werewolf to be a part of it, how scott becomes a true alpha and how he cares about his friends. i kinda feel like in later seasons him being an alpha was more talk than show which like /: meh. like i said, he stopped BEING the main character, just talked about as if he was.

i love how friendship is valued, but i think it could be more.. i mean the scene in the motel, all season 3b, scott and lydia, all the girls with each other.. i love it. too many times tho it "wasn't enough" and only romantic love worked which SUCKS. in 6a i was so happy scott went in to try and remember stiles and the memories hit me right in the heart. then when it "wasn't enough" i was SO pissed and frustrated goddammit. i guess that leads me to the next point-

ships, should i talk about ships? i don't want hate in my asks but oh well it's been a few years maybe there's no fandom to care. I'll start with the end

malia and scott. what. the. fuck. when, out of fucking no where, they had like a lingering look or something i was just "nope. no thanks". and then every scene they had together i had to cover my eyes bc it felt so wrong and bad and awkward. jesus. no build up at ALL, they're like family, i just. ew. no. it felt way too much like "oh we gotta pair off the leftovers" or "the main character can't end up single" well guess what, he fucking can. it was. god. i can't even explain the disgust. when he needed to heal and all she had to do was kiss him ugh. it felt so fake and empty of meaning. i would 100% prefer for it to be stiles (I'll get there) or his mom who snapped him out of it.

melissa and chris, i could get aboard with that. def cute, def weird af since his dead daughter was dating her son but, well.

stiles and lydia is a ship i have conflicting feelings about. i absolutely hate the concept of "the nerd" is in love with the popular girl since freshman year and he's borderline being a creep ("oh but it's stiles! he's a dork and he's harmless" no.), completely obsessed with her and she ignores him but then they end up getting together.. i mean, it sends a bad msg to obsessed boys about how it's worth it in the end, and it makes the whole relationship feel unbalanced from the start, makes her reciprocation feel unatural. BUT, i have to admit the show did kinda make me warm up to this ship by the end, curse them. it was kinda cute. i wish there was more mutualness before it became such an important part in 6a tho.

just gonna put it out there: malia/kira and lydia/allison. i wish we saw more girl on girl interactions in general but the ones we had were very good, great dynamics.

i won't get too much into it but i.. i don't ship st*rek. i understand why they're the biggest ship (two white hot boys that interact with each other, i mean.), and i see the couple of fan service-y moments the show throws at us but just. they don't have my heart, i don't really care about them. not the characters, the characters i absolutely love! (tho this watch i skipped most of season 1 and 2 and 3a and i think that's where derek is the most asshole.. didn't he do really bad things? idr) idk if you want a bad character on the way to redemption with someone you should ship liam and theo who had way better shippy chemistry imo, even tho their ship probably wouldn't be healthy given their dynamic history, huh.

the ship that does owns my heart? scilies. I'm a softy when it comes to best friends to lovers, and their bond and relationship is just. so. pure. don't get me wrong, i love me a good platonic relationship, but there was just one to many homoerotic interactions between them for me not to ship it, hard. (not to be that person but my guess is that if Scott was white it would have been a way bigger ship, but who knows?) i love their love, i love they would do anything for each other, and i feel like there were a bunch of very missed opportunities for them in later seasons :(

so representation. this feels like a show that is trying to be Woke TM but it's not going so well. the main character is supposedly latino but it's never ever addressed. idc about "oh we want a world without prejudice" you can still fucking address it. i mean they went to Mexico a couple of times, stiles keeps saying "Mexican cousin" i mean. god. give us something. did i mention scott was told he'd make a great "nazi youth" ..

and you don't need to be a genius to see the most characters are very white or at least very white passing. and when you don't address their non whiteness they might as well be..

i already mentioned how poorly i feel kira was treated, but also mason, who is a wonderful character, gets no depth? we know nothing about him other than being gay and smart pretty much.

i also spoke about the women already but, they were really really great women characters, but not enough of them, not enough that lasted.

there's not much to talk about disability bc it just wasn't on the show. the only blind character was healed which. /: same with epilepsy and asthma..

i think the show is probably very proud (ha) with their LGBTQ+ rep bc they're like "oh let's make this insignificant couple gay bc hey nbg". examples are lydia's grandma, La Bete and marcel, i think nolan and jiang were exes and then nolan and gabe were a thing? idr if it was explicit. the couple of girls in the tent.. probably a couple more. it's nice, def better than all random couples being straight but that's not satisfying as rep.

Danny was great. i think he and ethan were.. cute? i think he was awesome, i loved danny so much and was very excited to learn he KNOWS at the end of season 3 and was waiting to see him join the pack. instead he fucking disappeared?! wtf. #WhereDidDannyGo

brett was cute rep, especially being bi but i feel like it could go into the insignificant pool which, again, is better than nothing.

mason and corey i just don't have strong feelings about. they were definitely cute and I'm glad they were together, i love mason A Lot. i think this relationship could be explored more, or at least the characters could be explored more to give this relationship more depth.

very interesting how there's no wlw canon couple, not even hinted. just fan servicey hot malia kira dance which /:

not to mention transgenderness. god can you imagine the interesting plotline of transitioning while being a werewolf 0:

i think the rep i was most happy about was ethan and Jackson. even tho i don't think there was build up or clues in the first couple of seasons, I'm happy for the actor who i know was struggling with coming out publicly, and it was very fun and refreshing for the ending. even if we got very few scenes with them the dynamic was 10/10

the biggest problem is obviously stiles. i just don't understand why, if they're so supposedly progressive, they went to that length to queerbait without following through. the whole gag of wanting to be attractive to danny and to gay guys, the whole "aww danny want to have sex with me that's so nice", the whole "do you like guys too?". it's a gag. his alleged bisexuality is the butt of a joke, and it pisses me the fuck off. they don't have to make it a big deal or have him get a bf for it to be official. it wasn't subtle subtext. it was a CHOICE. to put a spotlight on his sexuality but not deliver. -100/10 would not recommend.

also they could talk about his mental health more.

and about Scott's, please and thank you.

and everyone's.

i had some more feelings, like villains changing sides without getting a proper redemption and having no consequences, the wholesomeness of the sherriff and mellisa being each other's kids second parent eichen house (wtf??), and more, but i think i wrote enough for now.

tl;dr- good show with A Lot of problems, will always have a place in my heart bc I'm a nostalgic gal.

[aliynavenus]

DamiRae Fanfic ‘Vulnerable”

Links to part 1 and 2 —>|| Part one || Part two|| 

word count - 5K (she’s a long chapter today guys) || Rating M (we finally got a little razzle dazzle of smut on this one guys.) 

Part 3: “Helpless”

-------------

Fuck. Damian cursed as his back fell hard onto the floor of the training room. Dammit. Gritting his teeth at the young half kryptonian boy who managed to get a hit on him. His skin crawled knowing that his form was sloppy today. He never let Jon make him land on the floor; it made his skin itch. 

“Hey I got you! Who’s a better fighter n--” 

Swiftly Damian leaped over behind him rapidly sliding his legs across Jon’s ankles causing him to lose his balance, falling to his back. The pain of surprise hit him hard, “You could’ve at least let me have my moment--.” Jon’s breath hitched when he felt Damian’s katana under his chin. 

“Next time don’t think one hit means success until fully knowing your opponent can’t get up anymore,” placing his katana back into his holster adding a sharp clean clash that came from it. 

“You seem extra cranky today.” 

Damian ignored Jon’s remark who was rubbing the back of his head. He moved towards the transmitter in the corner of the room. Though he had to admit he was extra irritated today. Today was the day of the mission. The day where he would see Raven again after kissing her or more after like making an idiot out of himself. Not once has he seen her around the tower, for anything. Then again not like he could blame her for avoiding him, he did after all put her in an unwanting situation. 

“Dude what’s up with you?.”

“Nothing.” turning his back towards him not wanting to reveal the real reason he’s...off. 

“So nothing between you and Raven happened last night.” 

Snapping his body towards Jon with a bigass dumb grin plastered on his face acting as if he just solved a world’s case. 

How could he possibly know? Goddammit superhearing. His eyes widen feeling his palms become cold just thinking if Jon actually heard what happened. Wait--did that mean he heard everything? 

“Shut up. You should’ve been asleep, what the hell were you doing eavesdropping on us Jon.” Heat was raising up his body clenching his fist trying to resist the urge to take that smile away from him. 

“To be fair I’m hurt that you didn’t me right away! Second, I wasn't eavesdropping I can actually control who I want to hear. But I saw you leave her room -- you seemed like you did something….something you regretted. You kissed her didn’t you.” 

Even though Jon was dense at times he was good at assuming. He was right. He did regret it, not because it wasn’t good, but that it felt so damn good that made him feel guilty. “Yea so what? Doesn’t matter.” 

“Doesn’t matter!?” Jon mocked Damian’s words “Dude that whole thing matters. I always thought you were allergic to having emotions. Now seeing you finally telling Raven how you feel man I gotta say you really got balls if that’s one way you express your feelings for her.” his eyebrow rose up knowing full well that he was referring to the kiss.

But something else struck him when Jon was talking, ‘Now seeing you finally telling Raven how you feel.’

 Fuck. 

He didn’t tell Raven how he felt instead of actually telling her what he feels for her, he let his actions take over him. Gods how can he be so stupid. Now that definitely didn't help him in this situation. She probably thinks that he just did it for his own guilty pleasure. He could partially feel his entire soul leave his body making him feel, dare he say….like Jason. Who was always toying with girls emotions so he could get laid. He felt disgusted.

 Didn’t help any better when Jon was noticing Damian’s mood change, “Don’t tell me that you ended up just kissing her instead of actually telling her!” Jon really was an expert at assuming correctly. And assuming correctly that Damian hated. “You're going to have to tell her today. If you don’t, you just became Jason.” 

Yea that’s something that he never wants to happen. But Jon was right among the other reasons. Today he had to tell her, he couldn't wait anymore. “Thank you, Jon” giving him a small smile to acknowledge that him listening and rare advisable words were appreciated. 

“Don’t fuck this up,” 

Damian snorted and rolled his eyes, turning his back to him to get prepared for the mission. He couldn’t mess this up. Not this time, especially with Raven.  

---- 

“Donna, hurry up, you look great.. Kori said we have 10 minutes before leaving.” 

Actually if anything Raven wanted Donna to take longer getting ready to avoid Damian even longer. Admitting she was ignoring him all day being mainly stuck in Donna’s room after telling her the news about that damn kiss. 

“Okay okay, I’m ready.” Both of them heading out towards the elevator at the end of the hall. “You sure you’re ready to see Damian again? I could cover for you ya know. I could tell Kori yo--” 

“It’s okay Donna, really I can’t avoid him forever. Me and you practiced this, I’ll just act like nothing happened and we’re still friends. Besides, we have a mission to do” 

Hearing the ding from the elevator knowing full well they reached the main ops room. Her stomach tightened when she saw the elevator doors open. Friends. The word she had to remember to get through the entire night. 

Damian saw Donna and Raven step out the elevator and holy shit was he in trouble. Not seeing her throughout the day tortured him but seeing her now it killed him. She looked fuckin amazing -- incredible actually. Her dark hair perfectly rested right above her breast. Seeing the extremely short dress only reach her mid thigh. That damn dress emphasizing her delicious figure. Did she really have to go out wearing that at a club. Dammit he really needed to keep an eye on her, especially tonight.

At this moment no one else should ever be looking at her in that short dress but him. This image should only be meant for his eyes only. 

“Team, you have a mission, remember. Find out any leads, you all should be let in smoothly with your fake IDs. Raven open up a portal to the alley of the club please. I will see you tomorrow to get a full report on what you discovered. And no drinking!”

It was Donna and Jon to groan at Kori’s last instruction. He didn’t want to admit it but at a time like now he really did need that drink to restrain him from taking Raven’s hand and leaving this mission to his teammates so no one will be able to see what is meant to be his. 

---

This club was a nightmare for him but seemed like a playground for Donna. The blinding colorful lights beaming across the room with excruciating music blasting making the walls vibrate. It was like a maze with stairwells after stairwells leading to another floor that wasn’t too low from them.  Countless drunks and perverts just staring, grinding their bodies at women who danced alongside them on platforms and Donna was one of them. She thought the best way to get in tell was by dancing with regulars who came every weekend. And it was a very disturbing sight in his eyes especially Jon’s who Damian could feel the tension rising from his body who only sat next to him at the bar. 

“Calm down Jon. Wouldn’t want to blow our cover.” Damian mumbles taking a sip from his non alcoholic drink. 

“I know.” he turns his body scoping the place taking a notice in something that could interest Damian or might he say drive him mad, “You too, don’t look now but looks like Raven is getting some attention.” 

Damian clenches the glass, furrowing his eyebrows turning his head slightly to see what Jon was talking about. Raven was getting attention, attention that he didn’t like. Males surrounding her as she was seated on a love couch across from them. Her legs were crossed and that only made her dress rise higher and for some reason she looked like she was enjoying herself. Happily talking to the males who were offering her drinks and giving her their number He turned his entire body to face them, watching to make sure they didn’t lay a finger on her. Then again he had to think about the mission, he had to know that she was acting flirty only to obtain information. Right? That was the only explanation why she’d let them get close to her. But fuck did he feel blood rush up his veins when ever one of those bastards gave her a flirty smile. 

“Damian, I’ll be right back. Think I see someone who could have something. Don’t stare too long.” 

He just nodded looking towards Jon walking towards a girl putting on a flirtatious front. Boy was Donna going to be furious if she saw that. When he turned his sight back to Raven she was gone. Slyly looking left and right to see where she wen--

What the fuck! 

His fist clenched the glass so tightly that it could easily break if he didn’t keep his cool. It was like rage overflowed his body when he saw that. Some bastard dancing with Raven on the platform, feeling the dips in her body. Having his unwanting breath breathe down her neck with his crotch pressed against her ass. If she was trying to get in tell, she damn sure pissed him off on how she was doing it.

Remember it’s an act. 

His conscience kept telling him not to give in. Watching that scumbag begin to explore Raven’s body. 

Don’t impose. Don’t impose. 

Seeing his hand settle right below her navel. That thin dress, that scum could probably feel her bare skin under. Damian grinded his teeth watching every move until his eyes widened. That was it. That drove him over the edge. The edge of staying calm to completely furious watching that pervert place kisses down her neck. He didn’t care if this guy did have plausible information. End of cover for him. 

“Don’t touch her. This one’s mine.” 

Without even realizing it Damian grabbed Raven’s shoulder pulling her to his chest leaving her no longer in contact with that man. Even though his eyes were fixed on the scum he could feel Raven’s gaze on him feeling her unexpected surprise. “What the hell man. What are you her boyfriend.” Tch, guy really was the sum of the earth thinking he can question him. 

“Yes I’-.” 

“He’s my bodyguard!” Raven cuts in between them, having to think quickly already feeling the eyes of people staring, “He gets a little cranky when I’m no longer in his sight. Payed him good money for his security to keep weirdos off me, unfortunately he rudely interrupted our moment that I was enjoying.” her eyes burning into him yet unfazed him because he didn’t even look at her. Instead, he was still giving a ‘I’ll you kill’ look to the young man she was just dancing with. “I’m so sorry for him, we should do this again sometime.” 

“Yea for sure. Call me. Without your little friend.” The tension was thick that you could cut with a knife. It's like a battle in Damian’s and the mans eyes that don't need words to know that were obviously unfinished business. 

“You should leave before I decide to cut your hands off after touching her.” 

His voice in a low growl but yet loud enough where it felt like the music around them fazed in silence. On that note the pervert gave him a dirty side eye seeing his jaw tighten by the aggression in Damian’s voice, yet still seeing a game wanting to be played in the man's eyes. “I’ll see you around, Rachel” The scum left distancing himself from the crowd until he was no longer in their sight.

Clearing his throat Damian turned to Raven gliding his hand through hers. His fingers resting on her hips, bringing her closer. Their bodies awkward at first but slowly drifted to finding the rhythm of the slow might add sex song that was blaring. The least he could do was still try to keep his cover and not make a scene. 

Raven slid her hands around his neck, lifting herself up just a little higher to level her lips to his ear, “What are you doing, Damian. I was trying to get information. You could’ve made a scene.” 

Oh a scene he was going to make if he watched any further of that nonsense. 

“Bullshit. That guy was scrawny and a creep. There is nothing you could’ve gotten.” 

He eyes to look down into hers. Was she always this much shorter than him even in heels, she was trying to put an annoyed front but damn that only made her look cuter. This was the first time he’s seen her so close ever since their kiss and by gods did he miss looking at her. 

Not being able to keep her eyes on his she turned to the side feeling her cheeks redden by how closely their bodies were swaying to the music to blend in. “Actually he’s the owner's brother. If anything was going on in here, he would’ve been our best shot. Now that’s gone” 

 Feeling a cold tense rise up his spine by the way she was sounding. Her tone was rather annoyed and uninterested almost like she didn’t want anything to do with him. Not like he could blame her, he did just scare off a possible lead and kiss her the night before. 

“I need to say something to you.” spinning her gracefully so her back is now pressed against his chest, their hands never leaving one another. His face pressed against her soft hair still having the same scent of vanilla he loved but it only made their bodies move a little more intensely

“And now is the best time? Damian I don’t -- we can’t get noticed.” she stuttered not wanting to give herself away that if she stayed any longer in his grasp, she knew he was going to hear her heartbeat pound louder than the music. She couldn’t face him not yet , she couldn't handle the thought of what he needed to say to her was possibly another apology and rejection from their kiss. Pulling herself away from him slowly letting out of his grasp, not being capable of this position any longer. 

Yet when she finally loosened from him she felt Damian’s grip her wrist to bring her back, twirling her in a slow motion so this time they were face to face with one another. 

“Don’t pull away…..not yet.” he dropped his voice in a rumbling whisper against her ear pressing a firm hand on the small back of her waist, holding her close more protectively worried that she would run off again. 

“I can’t wait anymore. When I kissed you it was amazing.I didn’t just do it for my own pleasure. I don’t want you thinking that I’m no more than just another Jason or Stephany because I’m not.” Damian placed his other hand to gently cup her cheek wanting her to pay attention to every word he was about to say, “I kissed you because I’ve been having feelings for you Raven and I’ve been trying to avoid them. But it’s like they take over my body whenever I see you. I mean shit, half the time I get nervous talking to you. What I’m trying to say is I feel so fuckin vulnerable whenever I’m with you. That it hurts so bad when I’m near to protect you and I don’t feel pain that easily, Raven.” 

Was this really Damian? It felt like fireworks were being sparked in her stomach when she heard him. He basically just said he liked her. She’s never seen Damian this raw with his emotions and he was expressing them to her. It felt like yesterday that he was brooding over her about not being able to trust her on his first day being on the team. Now here he is confessing that she makes him vulnerable. Sure the location of confessing his feelings for her were a little….different in perspective but little did he know she felt the exact same way about him. 

“I feel--” 

Interrupting her confession by the sound of phones vibrating against each other’s clothing. It’s the world won’t give them a break on cliffhangers. 

Me and Donna found a lead and a lot of evidence. Meet back at the tower the club is closing in 20 mins. 

“We should get back.” Damian said looking up from his phone seeing security guards motioning people to leave. “Let’s go.” 

Of course he wanted to hear what she had to say. The suspension was like a knife under his jaw waiting to see what the hell she was going to say. Although it was ironic the one time he let out his emotions to the person he deared the most was also the time for a rude interruption. Great timing Jon.  

-----

Silence was between them when existing Raven’s portal to enter the main ops of the tower seeing Donna’s head on Jon’s shoulder who were snoring loudly. It was almost 3 in the morning on a Thursday night and seeing Jon and Donna have more fun at a club than their mandatory fun days it was practical that they would knock out when their tired bodies reached the couch. 

Raven on the other hand still had her feelings to say to Damian still yearning to tell him. Grabbing Damian’s hand putting a finger against her lips, “Shhh come on.” guiding him to the elevator to enter the hallway of rooms that belonged to them. 

“Come in.” She had admit she was feeling rather bold guiding him towards her bed. She wanted to make sure Damian knew exactly what she made him feel too. 

Damian’s eyes were slowly exploring the backs of her exposed body, seeing her ass sway watching the hugging dress lift up with every move she made. Until that visibility disappeared when she pressed his shoulders to sit on her bed. It felt like a different aroma was in the air tonight, it was tense so tense you cut through it. He didn’t even know what she felt towards him yet but he sure hoped it was something similar. 

His eyes lingering on her body watching her set her ass on his cock. Fuck. She could definitely feel his boner poking her. A faint blush crept over his cheeks feeling embarrassed of what her game was. He was trying so hard to keep his breathing under control but it was hopeless with her breasts desperately wanting to be free from her dress, pressing up against his red button down  “Raven-” 

Before another word could come out of his lips, he groaned at the surprise of Raven letting her lips join his in a gentle kiss. Tasting her once again it felt like heaven. Yet this was different. It wasn’t rough or desperate like their last one but more so soothing. Taking the time to admire one another’s lips keeping the subtle pace as their fingers explore their bodies. His fingers tipped her chin wanting to explore her more yet making sure not to bring too much force, scared she would reject his touches. 

“Are you sure-” he paused between her lips, only her answer wasn’t even an answer, it was her bringing their lips in sparks of heat that burned, having her yearn his touch. This kiss was no longer gentle, it was hungry. 

Of course she wanted this more than anything, she needed it.

 A low growl escaped his lips feeling her tongue meet his. This gentle makeout was turning to a messy one quick. Fisting his fingers into her hair to tilt her head to gain more access in her mouth, gripping her ass roughly that it only excited her more. That made her take the chance to bite down on his lip, making him groan against her mouth. She loved hearing him sound defenseless against their lips that it made her clench the collar of his shirt she so wanted off. 

Their lips lost connection when she let out a small whine feeling his hand bring down the line of her dress, massaging her breast. She knew she probably looked like an utter mess in his fingertips but so was he. Watching his enigmatic emerald eyes darken, never leaving hers.  He wants to see every second of Raven’s face as he pleases her, seeing her helpless as he twists and causes pleasure to her sensitive nipple. 

He could feel her hips grinding against him, wanting to feel his bulge roughly slide against her thin damp panties. Her mouth parted open every time it pressed against her sensitive wet. 

“I want to make you feel good, beloved.” his lips pressing small kisses down her jaw bringing them to her nipple that his fingers were just playing with. 

“A-ah..!” A helpless wince came out feeling his hot wet tongue bit down her tit sucking hard. Oh gods. she never knew pleasure could be this good. Tangling her fingers tightly against his hair wanting more. Sucking her skin beneath his mouth until she felt the numbness over cease the spot. He was branding her. Gilding his tongue over his marks on her easing any guilty pleasure he caused her. She looked down only seeing Damian's eyes darken admiring his work of marks scattered on her chest. It was like desire took over him wanting to stroke every part of her body with his tongue. Not letting an inch of her skin left out in his fun. 

In the back of her mind she didn’t want to have all the fun. After all he kissed her first, he confessed to her, ultimately he made her feel good. She wanted to do the same. If not more. 

When she ran her hands up his chest she began unbuttoning his red bottom down. She desperately wanted to see what 18 years of training did to him. And she was impressed. Feeling the dents of his abs along with the patches of gnarled scars scattered across his hard chest. He stared down at her breathlessly seeing her needs overflow her. In fact even though he was always admiring her it felt like she was admiring him right now. It pleased him. 

Her fingers tracing over a stained scar that was planted above his heart. Even though her sweeping touches were delicate, it consumed him. Even though he’s Damian Wayne who was able to handle damages like these it strived her to draw all that pain he’s felt. 

“I want you, Damian. I want to make you feel good too.” her eyes lit up watching his eyes widen at her soft yet desperate voice. It made his cock twitch that he knew for sure Raven felt. Yet it didn’t scare her away or turn bashful, it just made her bite her lip with her translucent violet eyes keeping his emerald ones hostage in a stare. “Tell me to stop if you really want me to.” After that last request, she slid the dress off of her, leaving her exposed in only her matching white lacy bra and panties in front of him. Her body slowly slid down his, never losing the sight of his eyes, her knees meeting the soft carpet before him right in between his legs.  

Like hell he’ll tell her to stop when she looks like that. And holy shit was this a luscious view of her. She was beautiful. 

His breath hitched when she felt her palms on his upper thighs massaging. He needed her touch. He needed her mouth on his cock so fuckin bad. He dung his fingers into her bed not wanting to cause any sudden movements of her painful teasing. 

Her hands found his noticeable throbbing bulge feeling his length in her hands rubbing him through his pants. He groaned against her touch not being able to obtain himself anymore. “Please, beloved.” 

Even though Raven’s never done this before she felt like her body took control over her touch. The heat writhing through her body when she felt his cock jerk against her touch through his black slacks. “I want to kiss every part of you Damian.” Unbuckling his pants she let out his cock go up into the air, it was bigger than she expected. A lot bigger. Her hand pumping it slowly watching his face expressions soften at her touch. 

God damn it that felt good. 

Damian watched her throw her weight onto him making him fall back onto her bed, crawling over him still stroking him. Her knees on the sides of his hips continuing her pumps to his cock. It was like every his body felt helpless under her touches consuming the thrill of her hands on his cock. Gods. She was going to destroy him if she kept him up. How could this feel so damn good. Taking a look at her, mouth parted open, taking in each other’s suspending stares. 

She was damn perfect. 

Sliding a gentle thumb over the head of his cock she saw his hips thrust up to meet her touch when she did that. Raven could see the sensation driving him mad. So she leaned down taking in as much of him as she can in her mouth, pumping the bottom of his cock she couldn’t fit, quickly. 

Oh fuck.

This felt so damn fuckin amazing. When he felt her precious mouth lower onto him. “Fuck” he let his head lean back in a vulnerable breathless whisper. Feeling her tongue doing works of art to his cock. He really did need to repay the favor of how damn good she was doing. Lifting himself his upper body with his elbows, he watched his beautiful treasure filling him with pleasure beyond imagination when her eyes met his. 

“Don’t stop, whatever you do, love. I like that, a lot.” He couldn’t catch his breath when he felt her hands massage his balls. He was for sure going to hell for enjoying this. The feelings of being close to the edge of his climax struck him. He didn’t want his mess to appear in front of Raven, “Raven if you keep doing that, I’m going to cum. I don’t want you to be a mess because of me.”

He was too vulnerable to move. This felt so amazing that it was like stings burning into his body. The rush of heat and want filled him when she only quicken her pace when she heard him. 

She was already a mess. A complete mess for him. The thoughts of him not wanting to see her covered in his cum only made her want it more. She wanted to taste it. Her body aching for it she sucked and twirled her hands against his dick more. His cock hitting the back of her throat causing her small soft gags with each thrust that his hips gave into her mouth. Yet she didn’t pull away; she only continued more. 

Suddenly his muscles tightened when he heard her, feeling himself being released into her mouth all at once. And she swallowed every bit of it. Never in life time did he know something so damn messy would feel fuckin amazing with a person. His person. Raven. He watched Raven look up at him wiping the corner of her mouth with the back of her hand giving him an innocent smile like she didn’t just do a sinful pleasure to him. She laid her head on his chest tilting her head to face him. Reaching to play with his hair as if she was the most purest thing in the world.  How could she still look so damn innocent after that. He didn’t care though because whatever she does in his life she was always going to his pure beautiful beloved. 

Grabbing the blanket on her bed he pulled it over them, tracing small circles on her shoulder staring into each other's eyes. “So that was unexpected but reckon that means you feel the same way towards me.” he said with a hint of hesitation that he hopes that’s what it means.

She giggled at his bashful tone, “You reckon correctly.” her head lowering to his shoulder, her eyes leaving his. “Besides you make me happy. You got the daughter of a demon to actually like someone so…..I like you, too.” she muffled into his shoulder feeling warmth spread across her cheeks at how sheepish she sounded. 

Damian felt flushed. He could practically feel his heart hammering against his skin to be let out.  How could she have so much confidence in her sinful actions to him that she was choosing now to feel bashful. It just made her be so much cuter. Rapidly wrapping his arms around her, placing his head on the crook of her neck. They were in a ball of flourishment of affectionate feelings clinging to their bodies. “I really want to kiss you right now after that.” his voice in a low rumble.

“Then do it” 

 Gods, they were going to be the death to each other. 

“Oh!” Raven held up a threatening finger to him.  “And we can’t tell the team. Especially your brother and gar you know what kind of party they would throw if they find out, and questions, and absur-”

“Never are those imbeciles going to find out. Not now at least.” If they do find out, their grave will be set. 

Raven gave him a reassuring smile, feeling at ease with that answer. 

“Now where were we..” Damian muttered, settling small pecks on her cheek. 

Knock knock

“Raven, you asleep? I woke up really quick. I know you're awake. I just heard you. Come on open up you won’t believe what happened. I can hardly believe it.” Their bodies jolted hearing Donna’s voice came from the other side. Thank gods they locked it. “Don’t make knock this door down because you know I will like last time.” That was another story to tell.

Damian and Raven looked at each other immediately getting off the bed, finding each other’s proper clothes. 

“1….” Donna began to count

“Hurry up”  Raven mouthed to Damian who was putting on his boxers and gathering all his belongings making sure their wasn’t a trace of him that would lead back to him. 

“2….” 

“I think I got everything, open me a portal.” Damian whispered across the room to Raven who was tying a bathrobe on her body. 

“3....”

[izumisays]

dear yuletide author

Thank you so much for reading this and taking part in this wonderful annual conspiracy!


First of all, I hope you have a lovely time! If any of the fandoms below pique your interest, I’m delighted already, and ready to hear all the stories you want to tell.

Fandoms:  Chihayafuru, Nirvana in Fire, Thunderbolt Fantasy

As for reading preferences, I’m happy with a wide variety of tones and genres, of any rating, ranging anywhere from lighthearted antics to dramatic casefics. But the core of all the stories I love has always been character interaction and interplay of their competences.

How the characters play off each other and bring out their best/worst, how they’d react to a divergence of events, how true they’d stay to themselves in a different setting – I love fanfiction for allowing us to reconnect with our favourite stories time and again by asking these questions. And there are so many ways to do it! To name a few favourites, I’m always game for POV hijinks, a missing scene, a casefic, canon expansion, backstories and what-ifs.

You may notice that quite a few of my requests lean towards shipfic – those, too, are welcome in a variety of tones – but I also tried to include openings for gen ideas if that’s your jam. Additionally, while it is not usually my top interest, I don’t have anything against AUs if there is something that you are itching to explore: I tend to enjoy them for a new aesthetic that fleshes out the favoured character dynamics in a new light, or a fusion that redefines the playing ground to allow the characters to exhibit their core competences in new and exciting ways.

I would be very grateful if you could avoid a/b/o and similar kinktropes, played-straight soulmate fic, and character interpretation that runs contrary to their core values. If in doubt, please reach out to me on anon - the askbox is open!

CHIHAYAFURU: Mashima Taichi, Wataya Arata, Suou Hisashi

You don’t have to include all three characters, but I’d love to see a fic that explores the connections between them better. I’m up to date with all manga scanlations.

Wataya Arata/ Mashima Taichi

In the immortal words of Henjin Meijin, Arata is that person for Taichi whose opinion makes or breaks him. (His wording may have been different, but if I go rummaging into the chapter archive to find the exact quote, I’ll end up binge-rereading year three into the night again, and then where would my Yule sign-up be?) (On that note, what kind of a MASSIVE LOSER waxes poetics about Taichi’s boyfriend problems to Taichi’s MOTHER, whom he JUST met? Suou Hisashi, that’s who.) Needless to say, that paramount opinion was not always great, and neither was Taichi’s general wellbeing.

Good news is, Arata is confident in his manliness, and he has no problem acknowledging Taichi’s ridiculously pretty and not too bad at karuta these days, and he’s also moving to Tokyo. Taichi’s definitely pretty and has an apartment in Tokyo, where a country bumpkin of paramount importance may possibly stay over until things are sorted out… eventually. Hint hint.

Jokes aside, I pine for the dynamics between the two of them. I nearly lost it, reading the Meijin semifinals — and if you can show me a person who saw them bawl as they crawled into each other’s laps on Japanese national television and didn’t bawl in response, well, that person is sure not me.

I’d like to see a story that lets them build and explore that connect. I do not object to eventual OT3, but I think Chihaya is on a quest to find her own footing and pursue other goals at the moment, and I’d really like it if she was allowed to do this (join forces with Shinobu to drag karuta into a professional league, girl!). I’d like to think that in that space, different bonds and relationships can develop and strengthen, starting with Arata and Taichi.

Taichi the overanalyzer, the hardworker and the looker, the golden boy who at some point surely hit that red button, meme-style: you will be perfect at everything, you will have everything, except the one thing that you want above all. Arata appears to be his perfect foil: steady and serene where Taichi’s scrambling and flawed, adorably awkward and disarmingly sincere where Taichi’s groomed, smooth and miserable about his own deceptions. But they don’t see it like that! And they keep tripping each other up so beautifully!

I’d love to read your take on them growing closer and hopefully smooshing their faces together. Roommates in Tokyo? Long-distance friends? Figuring out how to tell your flatmate you’ve been in love with him since you were 12? Established relationship while hijinks happen? AWKWARD THIRDWHEELING WITH SUOU?!

On that note:

Suou Hisashi & (or / - wejustdon’tknow.gif) Mashima Taichi

I cannot believe that ridiculous man. Did you see a grown ass adult swoon because his unrequited disciple I mean not-friend I mean Taichi just up and went to meet his relatives??? To  help reconnect them?? One can do things like this?? What next, being able to make phonecalls like an adult??

Does not compute.

I was there, Gandalf. I was there when the story first indicated that we might be getting an unlikely team-up of the world’s weirdest Meijin and Tokyo’s most miserable overachiever. But even in my wildest dreams I did not dare hope to see them sprawled on the carpet on a humid summer afternoon, Taichi comfortable in his own skin and Suou, erm, probably not very comfortable with his fascination :D He did not sign up for this. He, a grown ass man in what must be his early twenties, is too old for this youthful seishun sakura bullshit. And yet it is he who mournfully accosts Taichi’s mom to talk about how this other boy is paramount in Taichi’s universe. He who gets offended because Taichi knowing how to adult and work the social ropes is too sexy and competent. He who finds something compelling in the painful struggle of genius and skill.

Arata - Taichi - Suou

For maximum indulgence of yours truly, bring those into one place. Arata coming to Tokyo and finding Suou a fixture in Taichi’s life how?! Suou being infinitely pissy at the Fukuyi upstart and yet dragging himself to socialize with the boys regardless like a totally-not-pathetic adult with a social life of his own? Arata being mildly puzzled about the antagonism, but in there for the sweet snacks?

You tell me! I delight in my anticipation.

NIRVANA IN FIRE: Mei Changsu, Xiao Jingyan

Is this a complex, narratively inevitable historic tapestry strangling people with its treads, full of delicious politicking and identity porn? Yes, it is.

Is my burning – nay, primal – desire so simple as to smoosh two faces together and watch them kiss? Yes, it is :’)

I mean, I will obviously not say no if the kissing is giftwrapped in the said tapestry of beautiful, politicky plot, but the fever I can’t get out of my system is this: LET THEM KISS, GODDAMMIT. LET THEM BE HAPPY. I welcome canon divergences, alternative endings, fix-its, insert eps and codas where it looks like they would have kissed (erm, or at least confronted each other in a way that would inevitably end with them making out) if only Mei Changsu wasn’t so caught up in self-loathing and fluffy foxfur coats, and Jingyan didn’t talk too loudly about his so dead, so very dead beautiful ex to hear Mei Changsu weep stoically into his beautiful white furs.

I adore Prince Jing. He is 90% cheekbones and 20% heartbroken pouting over his so very dead friends, and all of it noble and awkward and stubborn and deserving of happiness. Mei Changsu is ridiculous, and capable, and twisted into pretzels of his own creation: not above gloating over his enemies while daintily dipping cookies into his tea, he gets too caught up in weaving the tapestry to notice he is a part of it.  Pull him off his high horse, Jing! Render him helpless by being yourself! Do something about being hopelessly charmed with each other, through resentment, loss, bitter pining, and narrative inevitability! JUSTKISSALREADY.gif!!

THUNDERBOLT FANTASY: Rin Setsua; Sho Fukan

I LOVE THIS SELF INDULGENT WUXIA NONSENSE AND I CANNOT LIE!

Sanfan is a mixture UTTER GLEE and deep fondness for the genre staples, self-aware and masterful playthrough of all the wuxia tropes in the book, and one goddamn well-constructed story. It plays the tropes straight, calls them out with a knowing wink, walks the tightrope between the two with panache, and just as you are relaxed and enjoying this trapeze show, it grins cheekily at you, sets the discoball on fire and pulls a bunny out of a hat.  It’s DELIGHTFUL and fun and lovingly crafted, just like a good passion project should be.

I want anything that capitalizes on the absolutely hilarious dynamics between Rin Setsua and Sho Fukan (and while personally I end up using the Japanese versions of their names more often, please feel free to go with the Chinese names if you prefer). Sho Fukan does not want any of those heroic quests, he’s the human equivalent of been there, done that mood, and he just wants to REST and hopefully dump a bunch of magical murderswords someplace safe. Rin Setsua is a Totally Respectable and Non-Villainous Member of Society, of which he will inform you firsthand in the most high spoken and verbose way possible, and maybe even produce paperwork that has definitely not been tampered with. He harbours no ulterior motives, ever, and does not trail behind Sho Fukan for any reason beyond the pleasure of his company, and his mission to personally victimize and cockblock every morally derelict villain in two countries, by no-one’s request.

Whether you go shipfic (yiss!) or canon levels teamup circus (also yiss!), don’t hold back your horses. Everything about this is Extra, and should continue to be so <3

I am okay with both expanding the canon and playing with AUs/crossovers/fusions for this one, provided they retain the character dynamics. I love the extended cast as well: any characters including the Seiyou gang (and on that note, if you want to write the Seiyou backstory for Shou’s gang that has no Rin in it, you’re welcome as well), reappearance of the familiar faces from Touri (read: Rin’s victim list, past, future and present), original characters lined up and waiting to be screwed over (guaranteed) and rescued (the administration does not bear any responsibility etc etc).

Thank you for taking the time to read the letter, and I’m greatly looking forward to reading your story — and hopefully, getting to chat about these ridiculous and wonderful characters post-reveals :)

[vcdanvers]

Subway Girl (Carol Danvers x Reader)

Summary; Reader x Carol Danvers. R is out late and witnesses Carol being bothered by some stranger on the subway. Not knowing the blonde is Carol Danvers, better known as Captain Marvel, R comes to the rescue and insists on walking her back to her hotel. Soft. One shot.

Word count: 2100 something

Warnings; Mentions of harassment on public transportation

A/N: (21-7-2019) HIIIIIIIII what’s up, how are you doing? I promised @mcgrathandwives I’d write a soft Carol fic and then I randomly had this idea- for some reason it just kept getting longer, so here we are. I hope you like it!! If you do, it would be super awesome if you left a like (or whatever the cool kids call it) and if you’re feeling extra generous, some feedback would be amazing. Thank you for being here and have a great day (: Remember to stay hydrated! Love, Alie

 Your seemingly endless shift had finally come to an end, or more so you decided it was over. You were left to close down by yourself and the past hour had been incredibly slow. One customer. Purchasing one bottle of water. You had had more thrilling shifts and ending this one a little early wouldn’t hurt anyone. Fifteen minutes was harmless and if someone really wanted to buy something still, they should have come earlier. You had been here all day on exactly three hours of sleep- you had other things to worry about than some customer complaining about having to pay 5c for a plastic bag, like getting home to your hamster and catching up with the newly released season of How To Get Away With Murder. Those were things to worry about.

You had finally managed to kick the backdoor shut- the thing desperately needed fixing- when you realized you had left your bag inside. ‘Goddammit’ you muttered under your breath as you now had to break open the obstacle once again and would surely miss the bus you had been hoping on catching. An agonizing wait of about 20 minutes later- 20 minutes you could have spent doing anything but sitting around waiting for some tragic, 50ft long, smelly vehicle- you were ready to start your journey back home. You supposed this was karma coming for you for closing down early, or for your lack of sleep leading to you being forgetful at times. Either way, you were finally on the move. Deciding to put a positive spin on things you admired the stars blinking up in the night sky. ‘At least there’s something pretty out there’ you thought to yourself as you were nearing the subway station. The neighborhood you worked in was rather rough so you had to be on guard at all times, especially being a woman roaming the streets alone at night.

Thankful to have made it to the right platform and in time for the train, you leaned against the wall and plugged in your headphones, blasting whatever came on shuffle first. Outside it had been chilly, it being dark outside and with fall approaching. The climate inside the station was a harsh contrast, the air felt clammy and the wind coming from the tunnels was oddly warm. You hummed along to the melody of the song as you entertained yourself by doing some people watching. Not in a creepy way, you just liked to make up stories for the people you saw. An older man and his dog, a gorgeous blonde and a rough-looking guy who you would not want to encounter in a dark alleyway. Perhaps that was just you being biased though, besides anyone you encounter in a dark alleyway was one person too many, but better be safe than sorry. You looked over to the blonde again, she was busying herself clicking away on her phone screen. Standing with her legs crossed and without any awareness for the outside world, you worried about her safety. Did she not know she was not in the pretty part of town? Tourists don’t tend to stray this far from the center so she was a local most likely. A poorly informed local, that is. Your sense of responsibility kicked in and you decided you’d keep an eye on her. Rolling your eyes at your own plan you sighed, odds were that you were not going to get the peaceful night in you both deserved and needed so desperately.

As the train approached you got in after the seemingly clueless blonde, keeping your distance but remaining close enough to observe the woman. She had sparked an interest inside of you, with the way she was dressed she fit in perfectly but her behavior was what made her stand out just as much as the clothes blended her in. The part of the train you were on was nearly empty, you sat down on one of the seats and checked your phone for any new texts. There weren’t any. You opened the Instagram app as some means of distraction, looking at the highlights of people their lives and scrolling past ads of products you definitely do not need sure was fun. You glanced up every 30 seconds or so to see what the blonde was up to. She was still tapping away on her phone, clearly finding more entertained in the small device than you could. After the third stop some tall, dirty blonde guy had gotten on. Having been born and raised in the neighborhoods that had quite the reputation for high crime rates, you had developed some sixth sense for trouble and it was going off now. He laid eyes on the blonde and sat closer to her than was needed, considering a lot of seats were still free. The blonde, however, paid no attention to the imposing stranger, continuing her activities on her phone. You noticed the unknown man eyeing her up and down before he put his hand on her thigh and started talking to her, the disturbed look on her face indicating it was definitely unwanted. By now you had missed your stop but the safety of the blonde woman was your main priority here. You had to do something.

Giving yourself a second to gather your courage, you made your way over to the blonde with a huge smile on your face and with what you hoped to be an excited expression. ‘Oh my gosh, Zoe is that you?! It’s been so long!’ you cringed at your own voice and the slight look of confusion on the blonde’s face did not help your case. You bent over to embrace her so you could whisper your plan of escape, thankfully she stood up making the encounter less awkward. ‘Sorry about that, I noticed the guy. We’re getting off next stop. It’ll be fine’ You whispered quickly. It was then that the doors dinged open and you grabbed a hold of the blonde’s hand, pulling her along with you. You quickly scanned your surroundings and noticed one of the coffee corners was still open. You looked over to the woman whose hand was still in your grasp, ‘Let’s go over there, he might have followed us and he might not be alone.’ you spoke. The blonde was about to open her mouth to speak when you, once again, pulled her along with you. The sooner you got inside the better. Besides, it was cold. In your hurry, you tripped over the uneven tiles that were supposed to resemble some sort of pavement. Again, it was not the pretty part of town.

Bracing yourself for impact, you were surprised to feel yourself come to a stop and pulled back up. With your heart still racing from the fall you looked up at the blonde, you breathed out a sigh of relief. ‘Thank you…’ ‘Carol, the name’s Carol.’ You smiled up at her ‘Thank you, Carol’ your cheeks turning red upon realizing you were still clinging onto this Carol’s arm. You quickly let go of her ‘I didn’t notice, I’m sorry.’ God, why did you have to make a fool out of yourself at every given opportunity? Carol spoke up, her voice sounding confident ‘So, how about that coffee…’ It took you a second to realize she was asking for your name, ‘Oh uh, Y/N’ you managed to stammer out.

Inside the coffee shop, you finally regained your composure, you were cold and tired and this hot liquid was going to fix both of those things, or so you hoped. Carol her drink was now ready as well and she made her way over to the table you were sitting at, sliding into the booth across from you. She wore a curious smile on her face before asking you what you were doing out so late all by yourself. You snorted at her question before noticing she was serious, ‘You’re asking me that? You do realize that you were the one that was basically an open target out there, right?’ As Carol shrugged in reply you continued, ‘To answer your question though, I was late because I had to lock up for work. Which is not a problem because I was raised here, I know the area. You’re clearly not from around here, so what were you doing, straying so far from the safe and touristy area? It can’t be for your enjoyment, surely. Wait- did you get lost here?’ you asked, your voice now laced with concern. Upon noticing your genuine concern the blonde tilted her head to the side, giving you a small smile- you really did not know she was a member of the Avengers and, in fact, perfectly capable of defending herself. ‘Not lost, just out exploring.’ You nearly burned your mouth at her answer from taking a too large sip, she could not be serious right now. ‘Out EXPLORING? It’s nearly midnight! You should not be out at this hour and especially not in this neighborhood. Where are you staying? I’m walking you home.’ You internally groaned at this Carol, exploring at fucking midnight in just about the shadiest part of town imaginable. Damn you and your sense of responsibility. The frown on your face must have been more present than you had thought it would be when Carol spoke up, ‘That’s alright. I can handle my own, trust me.’ You sighed and were about to speak up before she added ‘Feel free to tag along though.’ and raised her brows at you in a rather triumphant way. You drank the last bit of your coffee, your brows furrowing when realizing it was the last bit. It was a great cup after all. You got up and were about to bring your now empty mugs back to the counter, Carol was faster than you were though. ‘Got it.’ She said, sending you a smile. You grinned to yourself. Perhaps this walk wasn’t going to be all that bad.

‘Alright, so where are you staying?’ You were stood in front of the subway map, trying to figure out how to get the blonde back to, what you presumed, was her hotel. Carol looked doubtful for a second before looking as though someone had actually put a lightbulb over her head, ‘The Venetian!’ she replied sounding almost cheerful. You laughed at that, ‘That’s in a friendlier area. Alright, so we have to take the yellow line and get out at the fifth stop. That’s not too bad.’ Making your way over to the right platform you found yourself looking over at Carol, noticing how she played with the ends of her sleeves and how she walked fast. ‘It’s okay, you’re not alone now- it’s safe.’ You said in hopes to make her feel more at ease. Carol looked at you with wide eyes and a faint hint of a blush creeping onto her cheeks, not because she was scared- of course not, but because you had caught on to her nervousness.

Carol was tapping away on her phone again, probably texting someone you figured. You didn’t mind, you were tired and the peace that came with not having to talk for a moment was something you embraced. You nudged her shoulder to alert her that you had reached your stop and when she looked up looking a little confused, you giggled and explained, ‘This is us.’ At that Carol smiled and got up, offering you a hand, which you happily took. The hotel was, thankfully, only a three-minute walk from the station. Having made it into the lobby you guys, or well, Carol was greeted by a slightly scary looking redhead who eyed you curiously, ‘Brought somebody, Danvers?’ You opened your mouth to explain ‘No, actually-’ before you were cut off by Carol, ‘Don’t try me, Romanoff. Hey, Y/N, can I see your phone?’ Oblivious to the underlying question you handed her your phone with a black screen while bearing a confused expression. The redhead laughed and commented ‘She’s asking for your number.’ You felt your cheeks heat up and silently wished for the floor to just disappear from underneath you, ‘Oh, uh, of course’. You grabbed your phone and punched in the code to unlock it, allowing for Carol to add herself in your contacts as you did the same on her phone. ‘Thank you, Y/N. I’ll text you to buy you a coffee soon?’ You smiled up at her, ‘Sounds good. Have a good night, Carol! And your friend too!’ You said before turning to leave. ‘Goodnight, Y/N.’ Carol replied, smiling. As soon as you were outside Natasha started prying, curious about your identity, ‘Who was that?’ To which Carol just smiled- keeping the story of a very human girl on the subway coming to her rescue between the two of you just a little longer. The teasing about that could wait, she decided.

[misc-headcanons]

1st Place Prize: NS.FW Scenario (Law/Reader) 2/2

@hyakira (Time for SMUT)

The two of you moved further under the tree and quickly stripped your clothes. You tossed your shirt into the nearby crate of alcohol, followed by your shoes, pants, and undergarments. Because of Law’s arm injury, you decided to help remove his clothes; you quickly bent down to nip at his neck and collarbone before pulling his shirt over his head. Law’s hat fell off of his head, and he grabbed it before it fell into the sand. He handed it off to you and you tossed it with your clothes in the crate. He pulled you close with his uninjured arm for another rough kiss; you both had a lingering taste of bourbon on your tongues. “I can stay on top if you want,” you panted, breaking the kiss to remove his shoes and pants. “Just because of your…arm thing. Don’t wanna make you do too much work and make it worse…”

“Fine by me,” Law breathed, taking his sword (and its scabbard) and shoving it to the side. He stared up at you and drank in your naked body–soft, exquisitely shaped, and dripping wet from the rain. Fuck, you looked even better than he had dreamed. “You look…” He groped around in his head for the right word to describe the sight in front of him. “Good.”

…Probably could’ve come up with something better to say if he was sober.

You laughed and slowly pulled down his underwear, leaning close and leaving a trail of sloppy kisses and bites from his chest down to his hips. “Feelin’s mutual,” you snickered. Your eyes widened at the sight of his cock, which was already starting to harden. “God, you’re even bigger than I thought.” You reached forward and gently grasped his shaft, and groped your breast with your other hand; a small layer of precum immediately made your hand feel slick, and Law bucked his hips forward slightly. You smirked and lowered your head; as you slowly swirled your tongue around the tip of his cock, his right hand flew to the top of your head to grip your hair.

“F-fuck,” he stammered, watching you lazily bob your head back and forth against his cock. “Just like that…”

Every time his cock sheathed itself completely in your mouth, his grip on your hair tightened. After a while, his moans had become quieter and you took this as your cue to go faster. You immediately quickened your pace and Law gasped in surprise and pleasure as his hips snapped forward. Your nipples hardened at the sound of his balls suddenly smacking against your chin, and you moved your head even faster. The Surgeon of Death was panting harder and harder. “Fuck, your mouth feels so good,” he groaned. You felt his fingernails digging into your scalp, and you moaned at the slightly painful sensation. The vibrations of your voice around his cock was driving Law wild. “Look at me.”

You immediately complied and looked up at Law while he continued to fuck your mouth. His face was flushed and you saw him biting his lip. You’d never seen him look so desperate, so needy, just begging for you to make him cum. When your eyes met, his thrusting quickened to an unforgiving and rough pace; tears pricked at the corner of your eyes, but every part of your mind was screaming to keep going. “Fuck, fuck, ____…____, I’m–”

Law’s breath hitched and he shoved your head all the way down on his cock as he came, groaning your name one more time. You felt his warm cum shoot into your mouth and slide down your throat, and a few stray droplets spilled from your lips as you sucked in your cheeks to make his orgasm even more intense. A small amount of his semen pooled on your tongue and you wondered whether or not you should swallow it or spit it out into the sand.

After a few seconds, Law freed your hair from his grip and you moved your mouth away from his cock. He was panting again as he looked down at you with half-lidded eyes. “Any left in your mouth?” You nodded and opened your mouth to show him the semen on your tongue. One of his hands cupped your chin, and you could feel his fingers trembling a bit from overstimulation. “Swallow it.”

You complied, and slowly swallowed Law’s cum while still keeping eye contact with him. He beckoned you forward with one finger and you leaned forward to kiss him. His tongue feverishly explored your mouth and one of his hands squeezed and groped your ass. You let out a muffled moan and he followed suit, gently grinding his hips against yours. When he pulled away from the kiss, he wiped a strand of saliva from his lips. “Move your hips forward until your cunt is right here,” he ordered firmly, pointing to his mouth. “I want to return the favor.”

You giggled drunkenly and positioned your knees on either side of his head before lowering your hips; you felt his warm breath against your pussy and shivered with anticipation. “Too lazy to get up,” you teased, raising an eyebrow and running your fingers through his hair. “Or too tired from cumming so hard?”

Law’s hands gripped your thighs and you let out a small squeak. You felt his tongue run up and down your slit with slow, languid strokes. “L-Law…” You moaned and slowly rocked your hips, urging him to go faster. He smirked and went even slower, relishing in your whines. “Law, please! F-fuck, c’mon, just–”

A sharp slap to your ass made you jump, and Law stopped to pull his head back and give you a derisive stare. “Guess I’m just too lazy to go any faster,” he teased. “Or maybe I’m too tired from fucking that smart little mouth of yours.”

You felt the sting of his hand against your backside and winced. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it,” you moaned desperately. “Just please, please…”

Law raised an eyebrow. “Please, what?”

You bit your lip. “Please go faster…”

Law squeezed your ass again and you bucked your hips as his nails left a few red crescent-shaped marks on your skin. “Promise to be a good girl?”

You nodded vigorously, and he immediately pulled your hips down; his tongue rapidly flicked around your clit, and you cried out sharply at the sudden feeling of his tongue mercilessly assaulting your sensitive bud. Your hips rocked forward, and Law’s tongue dragged down to explore your folds. He felt his goatee becoming slightly damp as your juices dribbled down his chin, and he sighed deeply through his nose as he went back up to play with your clitoris again. “God, yes–Law…fuck, Law…”

Every time you moaned his name, he felt his cock begin to harden again. The bitter aftertaste of bourbon on his tongue was replaced with your sweet cunt; the sound of your moaning his name drowned out every other sound in the world. His tongue hit a particularly sensitive spot when he dragged it down to your entrance again and writhed inside of you. Your nipples peaked as you started to feel a warm, coiling knot of pleasure building up inside of your core. “Oh, fuck. Fuck, Law, right there! I’m about to—”

The second Law heard that you were close to cumming, he pulled his head back and went back to slowly moving his tongue up and down your slit. You whined in protest and squeezed your thighs. You were so close, and he just HAD to torture you like this. “Goddammit,” you snapped impatiently, “Why’d you stop!?”

Law stopped tracing your cunt and smirked, even though you couldn’t see his face. “Can’t make it too easy for you,” he replied, nibbling on the soft flesh of your inner thighs. “We’re rivals, after all…”

“Aagggh, fuck you,” you moaned angrily. “Either make me cum with your mouth or fuck me, just stop being such a fucking tease!” You let out a low sob and bucked your hips again, desperate for him to just take you already.

Law chuckled darkly and pushed your hips back; you followed his lead and positioned yourself above his cock, which was completely erect at this point. “All you had to was ask, ____-ya,” he said with a slight slur to his words. Whether he was still buzzed on the bourbon or literally drunk with lust, you couldn’t tell. He grabbed your waist and entered you with one swift thrust of his hips. Your tongue lolled out of your mouth and your eyes rolled back a bit as his cock stretched your walls.

He wasted no time in ravaging your pussy at a fast, desperate pace. You were so tight and wet, and the lewd look of pleasure on your face was just so fucking beautiful; none of his dreams about fucking you could have prepared him for such a sight. You moaned and rested your arms either side of his shoulders as you threw your hips back to match his pace. You’d never felt so full, so warm, so…fuck, you’d never felt this good before. His cock pressed against your cervix and you screamed with pleasure. A small sober voice in the back of your head told you that having unprotected drunken sex with your rival was a terribly stupid thing to do, but it was quickly drowned out by the sound of you and Law sighing and moaning with pleasure.

Law felt himself coming closer to the edge, and by the way your cries were getting higher and higher in pitch he could tell you were also about to cum. His hips snapped against you at an even faster pace and he let out an almost feral growl as the walls of your delectably tight pussy began to clench around him. “Who’s going to make you cum?” He reached up to circle one of your nipples with one hand and squeeze your ass with the other. “Say it. S-Say my—Fuck! Say my name.”

“Law,” you replied immediately. Your voice was thick and feverish, and almost unrecognizable to you. “Law, you’re gonna make me cum. Oh God, Law, please, please! Please make me cum!”

The tip of Law’s cock pounded mercilessly against your cervix and you felt the knot of pleasure inside your core finally unravel. You screamed his name and threw your head back as he continued to drill into you and he came a few seconds later with a long loud groan. You continued to ride him through your orgasm, losing yourself in the pleasurable sensation buzzing through your entire body; the feeling of his warm seed filling you up almost made you cum again instantly.

You were both panting as you stared at each other. Exhausted and drowsy from the alcohol, you collapsed against his chest with a soft sigh. He winced as part of you landed on his recent wound, and your eyes widened. “Shit, sorry,” you said quickly, moving to rest your head on the other side of his chest. You shifted your hips and rolled to the side so his cock was no longer inside you, and you felt Law shiver against you. He draped one of his arms around your waist.

“It’s fine,” he panted, pulling you closer into him. “It’ll heal.” His eyelids felt heavy, and the sound of drizzling rain around the two of you was making him feel incredibly sleepy. “So…am I out of your system now?”

You chuckled softly and turned your head to sloppily kiss his jawline. “Dunno yet,” you mumbled sleepily. “Might have to fuck you a few more times, Just in case….” Your eyes slowly closed, and you drifted off to sleep.

Law gently rubbed circles into your hip with his thumb as he felt himself falling asleep. Truth be told, he was hoping you’d say that; if this is where it had led, he definitely didn’t want this rivalry to end.

[zankivich]

Neighbors: Shawn x Plus Size Reader Chapter 9

a/n: hi. this one hits a little close to home to me, but I thought it was really important to explore the ways in which our perceptions of ourselves get largely created by the people around us, by the culture around us. I also just wanted to look at how being fat and happy is such a radical notion and how it is a difficult, difficult thing to manage. I really wanted to do that justice. I also just wanted to bring Shawn and y/n closer together and I thought, what better way than a messy ass family? idk. Tell me what you think. or don’t. k bye. 

*y/n pov*

You were stupid. Honestly you had to be fucking dumb. What other reason could there be for taking Shawn to the most ridiculous family in all of the world? Your sweet, sweet boyfriend was about to be tainted and it would be all your fault for taking him into the lion’s den. The need to not be miserable for another Christmas had clouded your better judgement, and it wasn’t until you saw all of your brother’s cars parked around your mother’s tiny house that you remembered why you were always miserable. It was because your family was a shit show.

“This was stupid. We shouldn’t be here.” You mumbled.

“What?”

You looked over at Shawn, all curly haired doe-eyed optimism and the sweetest smile you’d ever seen. And suddenly you could feel the distance between the two of you. It wasn’t just the fact that he was a rockstar and you were a regular ole person. It was that he seemed to have a certain level of purity that surrounded his life. Sure, no one was perfect, but Shawn was as close as you’d ever seen. You couldn’t handle the thought of him finally recognizing just how opposites you were in that regard. You didn’t want him to see the ugly, only the good. That’s probably why people wait longer to introduce their significant others to the family. Shit.

“I wanna go home. Let’s just go home, and I’ll call them and say we had car trouble. Please?”

He turned in his seat and reached for your hand threading your fingers through the gloves you each were wearing.

“Hey. This is your family. I--I was really looking forward to meeting them. What’s wrong?”

You shook your head vigorously. “My family isn’t like your family, Shawn. Please, let’s just go.”

“No. I don’t want your family to be like mine. I just wanna understand who you are better. I wanna learn more about you, honey. That’s all.”

“Yea but what if you don’t like what you see?”

He tugged at one of your gloves bringing your bare fingers to his lips to kiss at them. You looked over and his eyes met yours leaving you to realize that he had tricked you into eye contact. Asshole.

“I can’t imagine not loving all of the parts of you. Even the not so great ones. I love the way your hair clogs the drain for example, and your incessant need to organize the spice rack in my apartment. Or your incessant need to make me purchase a spice rack to begin with.”

You pouted at him immediately. “You have to have a spice rack Shawn. It’s a necessity. And I do not clog the drain.”

“Oh but babe you do. Like a werewolf took a bath. But I find it absolutely adorable. It made me learn how to use drain-o.” He smirked. “I don’t care if your family is crazy. I just want to meet them, okay?”

You rolled your eyes the way that he deserved because he was so annoying when he was sweet, but he just kept kissing your fingers like the jackass he was.

“Fine. fine, fine, fine. But don’t say I didn’t warn you.” You groaned.

Shawn pulled the presents you’d gotten out of the backseat and you headed inside together against your better judgement.

It’s one of your older brothers who answered the door and he’s already got a beer in hand despite the fact that it’s not even three o’clock yet, so this should definitely go well.

“Lil sis!” He snorted immediately pulling you into a headlock the bastard.

“Goddammit Rob let me go!”

He doesn’t and you’re transported back to being twelve years old and barely surviving with all the fucking testerone around. It takes a knee to the balls to get him to back off, or fall to the ground, but your family doesn’t play fair and he’d never learned to guard. You remembered when ‘Liyah had opened the door and Shawn and she had just hugged for five minutes straight. Your point was getting more proven by the second.

“Shawn this is one of my older brothers, Rob; Rob this is Shawn.”You panted, stepping over his crippled body.

Shawn winced. “Do you--would you like some help bro?”

“Don’t you dare.” You muttered pulling him deeper into the house. “We show no mercy.”

The rest of her brothers are littered around the living room. There are wives and kids and you’re anxious just looking at it all. You were the only one of the kids to not have gotten married and have children yet. And as if the physical presence of them all wasn’t clear enough, you would surely be reminded at some point in the evening. Once your brothers recognize that you’ve arrived it’s like a swarm descends and you’re suddenly being grabbed and hugged and hit from all angles.  They’re all massive and annoying and you being the baby means that they kind of all adore you, though years of emotional trauma means you all have a funny fucking way of showing it.There’s no place like home.

“Shawn these are the rest of my brothers. John is the oldest. Rob is the second oldest. Noah is the middle. And then there’s me, but you know me. Guys, this is Shawn, my boyfriend. Do not break him. I like him.”

Shawn is optimistic and smiley as ever as he reached to shake the hands of all your brothers. It is sickeningly sweet, and you love him for it.

“It’s about time she brought someone home to meet the family!” John snorted. “We were starting to think she was avoiding us.”

“I was and I am!” You interject.

Shawn chuckled. “Family is super important to me. I think she’s indulging me. I’ve heard so much about you all though; She must really love you.”

You know that he’s talking about all the times he got you wine drunk and asked you personal questions, also known as Shawn’s favorite pastime. But, tomato potato.

“She’s got a hell of a way of showing it.” Rob smirked, rolling his eyes when you flipped him off. “Lil sis, got her fancy college degree and moved as soon as possible. We’re surprised she stayed in Canada at all.”

Shawn gave you a look, but this is exactly what you knew was going to happen, so you purposely don’t make eye contact with him.

John looked Shawn up and down crossing his arms at the sight of your boyfriend. They’re about the same height, but John is more burley as opposed to Shawn’s chiseled form. You would hate to ever see them wrestle, there’s no way in hell it could end well.

“And now that she’s got a big fancy boyfriend, we figure we won’t be seeing much of her at all.”

That’s the first inkling you get that they’re not a fan of Shawn, which was something that truly had never occured to you. Shawn seemed to be like a magnet, sticking and pulling in all that came in contact with him. Everyone loved Shawn. That had been the one thing you hadn’t felt the need to worry about. Boy, were you wrong.

“I don’t know man. Like I said, family is so important to me. I’m sure we’d love to visit more if given the chance, but uh she’s her own woman. I wouldn’t want to ask her to do something she didn’t want to.”

“I bet you wouldn’t, pretty boy.”

You take that as officially your time to intervene. Your boyfriend was very pretty, but you got the sense that the way John was saying it was not meant to be a compliment. Being the baby, and the only girl of the bunch, meant that you had to know how to assert your dominance in the family. It was the only way not to get run over and stepped on. You were the most vindictive bastard out of all of them for that exact reason, so when you moved to shoulder check your oldest brother and send a glare his way, there was an immediate understanding to back the fuck off.

“Nice to see you all are still complete and utter assholes at heart. C’mon, babe I’m sure my mom is around here somewhere.”

You tug Shawn along with you and he sends a nervous glance in your direction. You wonder if he’s finally regretting coming to this hell hole.

“Did I do something wrong?” He whispered to you.

You sighed and wrapped your arms around his waist.

“Of course not. My brothers are just exerting their toxic masculinity. I haven’t brought a guy home in a very long time. They want to scare you to see if you’ll break. Don’t let it get to you.”

“Okay. I feel like I’m back in highschool but...mothers are my strong suit. I’ve never met a mother that didn’t like me.”

You snorted. “I’m not sure if your optimism is endearing or exhausting at this point.”

In the kitchen your mother was sitting at the table by herself peeling potatoes. It was a family tradition that no one was allowed inside the kitchen on big holidays when she was cooking. Not your brothers, their wives, not even her grandchildren.The only exception to the rule had been you. It’s where you learned everything you knew about cooking and baking, was afternoons after school spent beside her, when your head still met her hip, and she’d let you stand on a chair to see everything going on. When she peers up to look at you there’s a smile on her face in a very muted way. It’s more of a persing of her lips, but you know what it means and that’s all that matters. You leave Shawn’s side for just barely a second and step up to wrap your arms around her gently in a hug. You’d gotten your hair color from her, as well as your hips, chest, and fuck-off attitude. Your mother and you were very much alike in most ways. This only turned out horribly most times, but in times like this at least, you were okay.

“Hi, Mommy.” You murmured squeezing her tightly.

“It’s about time you come visit me. Your brothers are driving me up a fuckin wall, everyone of em.”

“I say you give them up for a adoption, sell the presents, and we go to Vegas.” You joked.

“Girl, don’t tempt me.”

When you look up at Shawn he’s standing against the door way with his arms crossed and a smile on his lips so big you kind of want to kiss it off of him. You hold your hand out for him to join you both at the table and he immediately links your fingers together to give them a firm squeeze.

“Mom, I wanted to introduce you to someone.” You explained biting back the smile that tended to burst from within you when it came to Shawn. “This is uh--this is my boyfriend, Shawn. Shawn, this is my mother.”

Your mom peers up at him inquisitively. It’s not a mean stare which is good, it’s just more of a searching one. He shakes her hand and squeezes it firmly between his oversized palms.

“It’s so lovely to meet you ma’am.” He grinned.

She raises her eyebrows. “You’re the popstar my sons showed me on youtube? You’re with my daughter?”

Oh lord.

He laughed. “Yes, I guess I am.”

“I like that one song. The blood song? They play it all the time on the radio.”

“In my blood? Yea! Well thank you ma’am; it’s an honor.”

You rolled your eyes at that. Shawn had gotten nominated for a grammy for that song, but as long as your mother liked it, it was an “honor”.

Your mother snorted. “Don’t call me ma’am, call me Julie.”

“Okay, Julie. Julie it is.” Shawn smiled. “Can we help you with the potatoes at all? I think peeling potatoes is one of the only things I’m good at in the kitchen besides eating.”

Your mother laughs and clutches her metaphorical pearls which is just the most ridiculous thing you’ve ever seen, but she lets him pull up a seat in her kitchen. It is genuinely unheard of in your household, and it takes you a second to move because you’re just watching him make your mom laugh and it’s a little bit incredible. He wore a black button up that day and when he rolled his sleeves up to wash his hands, his arms flexed and you wanted to wrap him up in your arms and nuzzle him to death. It was ridiculous the effect he seemed to have on you, and apparently any woman he came across.

“Babe, did I ever tell you? My mom used to have me and Aaliyah have competitions to see who could peel the longest string of skin off a potato. We were so competitive that now we can both peel it off in one.”

You rolled your eyes playfully and grabbed a potato from the bowl.

“Why is that the least surprising story I’ve ever heard. You guys are so wholesome it’s disgusting.”

“If you wanted to have potato peeling competitions with me baby, all you had to do was ask.” He smirked.

You shoved your hand into his face to try and dispel some of the perfection, but it was useless. In fact you were pretty sure all it did was fluff his curls into a better position. Asshole.

It had never occured to you to peel a potato in one even stream before. Because you were a normal person with things going on and who the hell has time for that. But the second Shawn held the curly strand up in front of your face like a cat bringing its owner a dead mouse, you realized that you could not be upstaged in the kitchen with this manchild you were dating. And thus began the dumbest competition to ever occur in the history of ever.

Shawn was actually really fucking good at peeling potatoes. Somehow the mystery of measuring cups failed him, but potato peeling? That’s where he shined. When your mother insisted that that was all of the potatoes that she needed, you ignored her in favor of getting out the sack of the rest of them from the cabinet.

Shawn chuckled. “Don’t worry Julie, we will take all leftover potatoes home with us.”

“You can take them home to your very cold, very lonely apartment by yourself.” You muttered as he bested you again.

Shawn dropped his peeler in favor for wrapping himself around you, half in your chair and half in his, to press all of his weight into you like the annoying man he was.

“Don’t get mad at me. You are better than me at everything else in this life. Can’t I have potato peeling?”

“No.” You moped.

He snickered. “Can I have a kiss?”

“Uh uh.”

“Not even a little one?”

“Nope.”

“Can I kiss you?”

“Mmm I don’t know.”

“Well I’m not gonna kiss you until you tell me I can, so I’ll just be here until you’re ready.” He murmured.

You rolled your eyes pulling him by the collar of his shirt to press his lips against yours.

“You’re annoying.” You whispered against his mouth.

“Yea, but I love you.”

“I love you too.”

Your mom asked you to make apple pie. It was her favorite of all the things that you made and it was pretty fun for you to make so you didn’t mind it at all. Shawn brought out the wine that you had brought and poured you a big glass with ice cubes the way you liked it. He was helping you make the pie by handing you the spices one by one as opposed to actually helping at all, when your mother decided that things had been going well for too long.

Shawn and you were standing at the counter while you cut up apples and you just happened to take a sip out of your glass.

“I wish you wouldn’t drink like that. Your father hated when women drank.” She sighed.

You snorted. “Yea, Ma, Dad also hated being a dad, so I’m not sure if his expectations are ones we should be trying to meet. Last time I checked he was an alcoholic anyway.”

“Don’t speak about your dad like that. He was a great man. Especially not on Christmas.”

Your knife slowed to a crawl on the cutting board and you could feel Shawn’s eyes on you as your cheeks began to warm up.

“No, Mom, he wasn’t. He was mean and abusive and a drunk. I’m not gonna pretend that he wasn’t and you shouldn’t either. You worked too fucking hard for us all of to glorify that asshole.”

Your mom goes quiet for a little while. That’s never good, so it’s really just a means of biding your time to see what she comes up with. Shawn watches you take a bigger gulp from your glass than normal, but no one is speaking so it’s fine. You’re used to it by now, but it’s Shawn first time at the rodeo. Your mother was your whole entire world because she had managed to create a life for four children off a nine to five desk assistant job with no college degree. She’d worked her ass off for them, but it had come at a price. And that price was years and year of emotional and physical trauma that she had endured through her husband. When it was all set and done that trauma didn’t just evaporate; it became internalized, and then it got regurgitated back onto you and your brothers. So when she opens her mouth it’s not to say anything good at all, and suddenly all of your fears about this day are just spilling out into the room and you’re helpless to stop them.

“So, Shawn… You’re successful. Young. Very handsome.” She murmured. “What exactly are you doing with my daughter?”

You were facing the counter, but Shawn had leaned against it the opposite way so that he was facing your mother. This meant that you caught a glimpse of his face going into shock without having to see your mother’s reaction to it.

“W--What...I’m not sure I understand what you mean, ma’am.”

If you could have spoken in that moment you would’ve told him that allowing your mother to expand and clarify her statements was never a wise idea.

“You know what I mean, son. My daughter isn’t exactly a supermodel. We l/n women have not gotten through life on the basis of our looks, that’s for sure. All that wine and potatoes certainly isn’t helping things.”

Holy fuck. If global warming could have sped up in that moment just enough for a crater to form in the earth beneath your kitchen and swallow you whole you’d be good with that.

“I happen to love your daughter ma’am. She’s an incredible, intelligent woman, and her body is just one on a very long list of things that I adore about her. You really shouldn’t say things like that.”

The knife isn’t even moving anymore. As many times as you’d heard it and everything like it, you could never grow used to the way your mom could speak sometimes. And as much as you’d learned about your body and the beauty it entailed, something about coming home always brought up the ugliest of thoughts that you were sure you’d gotten rid of. The new thing here was having Shawn defend you. Your brothers, though sympathetic had never jumped to your defense before. His willingness to go against her when he had been so concerned with making a good impression was kind of baffling. You weren’t used to it, or how good it could make you feel. There were so many different emotions running through you in that moment that they felt difficult to contain within you.

“What?! What I’d say? Oh y/n you’re always so sensitive and now you’ve got this poor young man doing the same.” Julie muttered.

You chuckled humorlessly. “Sure thing, Mom. My bad.”

“I wasn’t saying anything bad. I was just pointing out the obvious, dear. I was interested in what had brought the two of you together is all.”

“Then maybe next time you could just ask that as  opposed to asking the guy I’m dating what the hell he could possibly see in me.” You snapped letting the knife clang loudly on the counter. “Jesus Christ, I’m going for a walk.”

It’s cold as shit outside and the snow is up to your ankles, but somehow it feels less cold then being in the kitchen with your mother for another second. You breathed in and out a couple of times to calm yourself down. When you were younger and your mom would say shit like that it would cause a sort of thought spiral to begin in your head. It would be all that you thought about and all that you could focus on. The good news was that it didn’t consume you in quite that way anymore. But, it did hurt and it did affect you whether you wanted it to or not.

Shawn found you on the porch sitting on the bench that was sat outside and letting the snow sink into your pants. He was wearing that hideous yellow flannel jacket of his that made him happy, and he simply plopped down beside you so that your shoulders touched. You were still focusing on breathing at that point in time because you really didn’t want to cry in front of him. It felt like an admittance of some sort if you did, although to what you weren’t sure.

“I’m so sorry, sweetheart.” He mumbled  as you leaned your head against his shoulder. “I--I didn’t know.”

It was cold enough that the wind was biting at your cheeks and your eyes were watering without ever asking you if it was fucking okay to do such a thing.

“It’s fine.” You whispered. “Everything’s fine.”

He lifted his arm up to let you nestle closer to him and pulled you against him to press a kiss to your hair.

“It doesn’t have to be. It’s okay for it not to be fine. You taught me that.”

You sniffled. “I don’t have the time to fall apart right now.”

“Do you wanna go?”

“It’s too late. I can’t let her see that it got to me anymore than I already have. Leaving would only fuel her.”

“Okay...Well I have this very absorbent, beautiful jacket here that I know you know love so much. And I’ve heard that anything that happens to this coat stays in this coat. So, I think if you were to hide your face against it, it might be our little secret.”

You roll your eyes and laugh a little as a tear falls down your cheek. But when he’s offering you solace your helpless but to take it, so you tucked your face into the safe confines of his coat and let the tears seep angrily into the fabric. He rubbed soothingly at your arms and kept his face hidden in your hair. It was also as if he was protecting you from the world. That’s how it felt anyway. And you thought that if you’d been able to provide a fraction of the comfort that you got when he held you, than maybe you’d actually given him something good as well.

When you pull your face back ten minutes later the air hits aggressively at your cheeks but he’s immediately there to kiss and wipe away the tears.

“I think you’re really beautiful when you cry.” He smiled. “Not that I want you to do it unless you need to. You’re just beautiful to me.”

“Thank you.” You sighed still sniffling. “I told you we were a shit show.”

“That’s okay. No family is perfect y/n, not even mine. There’s still no place I’d rather be than here with you right now.”

You feel that pressure in your nose that happens when you cry. It’s like a clogging of your sinuses but instead of it being through illness, it’s just through sadness. Your shoulders are tense and your body is on guard the way it usually had to be. Something about having Shawn with you made you want it to be different. You had invited him after all because you knew you could be happy with him beside you. There was a need to take control of the narrative that so far your family had been running. And you thought that maybe you could make it better for the two of you.

“Do you wanna get high right now?”

His eyes widened and you couldn’t help but laugh a little into his neck.

“I’m sorry?”

“Noah? My brother? He’s a total pothead. We’re the closest in age though so he always shares with me. I need to mellow out before I go back in there.”

“You didn’t tell me you smoke.”

You laughed. “Neither did you. You just told the entire world instead.”

That’s how you end up hotboxing your garage with your brother and your boyfriend. You’d never seen Shawn put a blunt between his lips, but it might just be the hottest thing you’d ever seen in your life. Weed tended to make you horny, so it’s genuinely a matter of not jumping his bones on the hood of your mom’s ‘98 Honda. Noah had always had ridiculously strong weed too so within twenty minutes you’re all leaning against any hard surface you can find having a conversation about the ethics of mass female consumption in the music industry.

“It doesn’t bother you that like your body is essentially for sale?” Noah asked as he took another hit and passed it to you.

Shawn was answering but your brain had only caught the “your body” part and was working on undressing Shawn mentally right then and there.

“I don’t think so. I mean...I think my fans think I’m cute or whatever, but like the vast majority are here for the music. If my music sucked they could find someone just as good looking if not more and move on to the next guy. I know it’s about the music because they tell me about it constantly. It's always been about that for us.”

“Okay but like is it ethical to sell your body for fame, I guess is the question. And then like it is ethical to request hundreds of hundreds of dollars from what are essentially children?”

Shawn sort of squinted as he took the blunt from you and nestled it between his lips. Jesus, his lips. His hands. Hmmmmm.

“I gotta be honest dude, you’re kind of blowing my high.” He chuckled.

You snorted wrapping your arms around your boyfriend and sending your brother an accusatory look.

“Noah likes to get philosophical when he’s high. Let him get baked before we go bake please.”

Noah rolled his eyes. “Fine. Mom’s gonna be pissed when you come into the kitchen smelling like weed though.”

“Exactly.” You grinned.

Eventually Noah went inside to check on his wife and it was just the two of you. Shawn’s eyes were red and his cheeks were the same sort of hue and he was sending you this lazy smile that you wanted to lick off. It was really sort of ridiculous, what he did to you. And you wished more than anything that you’d gotten high together months ago because it probably would have solved all of their problems, if how good he looked right now was anything to go by.

“You’re kind of hot when you’re high.” You murmured stepping between his legs. “Why haven’t you told me about this again?”

His hands came to settle on your hips before immediately finding purchase on your ass the way that you liked. He pulled you closer between his thighs so that your hips touched.

“I don’t know. It’s a uh a sort of self-care thing for me I think? I don't do it just to get high, I do it because when I’m very anxious it calms me down. I like the way it makes me feel. I didn’t want you to think it’s all that I do though.”

You wrapped your arms around his neck and smiled goofily at your incredibly endearing and constantly overthinking boyfriend.

“Did I ever tell you about the time Stu, Bryan, and I went to Coachella?”

He pressed your foreheads together as if every part of your bodies needed to be touching, and in that moment they kind of did.

“No, but I’d love to hear it.”

“Basically I had student loan money out the ass that I definitely shouldn’t use. Stu and Bryan were like highschool sweethearts or some shit, and since they didn’t go to the same school Bryan surprised Stu with tickets to Coachella. We all go. Bryan sneaks us into some boogie ass tent that I’m positive we weren’t supposed to be at, but they had drugs set out like it was a fucking candy bar. So, we smoke enough weed to put Snoop Dog into a coma, I think Bryan and Stu did like cocaine or E or some shit, and then we all went and watched The fucking Wu Tang Clan perform in the middle of a mosh pit. I think I almost died that weekend.”

He laughs a laugh that you’ve never heard come out of his body before. Shawn usually had a laugh that was quiet, it was always a sort of silent chuckle. Whatever the hell was being produced in front of you was nothing of the sort. His whole body shook and the laugh seemed to stem from his belly and explode outwards. It was the cutest shit you’d ever seen in your life, and you’d happily smoke him out all of the time if it meant getting him to laugh like that.

“Holy shit, I can just imagine you doing that too.” He laughed. “I’ve always wanted to go to Coachella.”

“Yea? We can go next summer. You, me, Bryan and Stu, maybe your friends can come too. We’ll get high as possible. It’ll be fun.”

He hummed softly and snuggled deeper into your arms.

“I think Andrew would hate that idea...Let’s do it.”

***

*Shawn’s pov*

Christmas with Y/n’s family is more of a shit show than he could have ever imagined. But it also served as the most informative experience to understanding who she was as a person. To see her be this confident, take-the-world-by-the-balls woman now knowing the context of where she came from made him fall in love with her all over again. He understood her necessity to do everything on her own, with the role model of a mother who hadn’t had a choice, and a relationship with her family that hadn’t really felt supportive. It was clear that she was the baby and that they had wanted her to follow in the pattern of everyone else, to get married like her mom had, and maybe have some kids. It was also obvious that they didn’t understand the success that she’d achieved in her life thus far, couldn't wrap their minds around her having her own assistant instead of being one. And yet at the heart of it all every single one of her family members absolutely adored her. It felt incredibly disorientating and conflicting just watching it, and so he he couldn’t imagine what it would be like to live it.

It isn’t until later when the pie is baking and the ham is still in the oven that she takes him to her childhood bedroom. There’s not much to explore because her mom had gotten rid of her stuff when she went off to school. So, they just lie on her twin size mattress with her head on his chest as she opens up to him again.

“My dad left for the final time on Christmas.” She murmured. “He’d always disappear for weeks or months at a time on benders or whatever, but when I was seven he left for good. I was so young that I-I didn’t understand you know? That he was sick and dealing with addiction. I thought...I thought it was my fault.”

He reaches to tangle his fingers in her hair and kisses soothingly at her forehead.

“Holidays are hard. I’ve just never really worked through that feeling I don’t think. And I try not to feel that way. So that’s why I don't come home very often and that’s why,” She pauses to smile and squeeze him. “That’s why it meant so much to have you here...Thanks.”

“Anytime.” He promised kissing her forehead. “I’m sorry if I forced you to stay when you didn’t want to. You should always have a choice and I feel like I took that from you.”

“No. Don’t apologize. Now when I think back on this room I’ll remember this moment, and not all the fucked up shit that happened here. That alone is worth it.”

It doesn’t really make him feel less guilty. There’s so much history there for her and so much of it seems to be bad. He had forgotten that just because home for him had always been this incredible, special place that not everyone got to have that. And it wasn’t fair of him to assume that of her, that maybe even making that assumption had hurt her more in the end. All he knew was that he wanted to make it up to her, because she was so good to him that even if he had done something wrong she’d never admit it, but he was high as a kite with so few good ideas in his head.

“You think maybe I could give you some more good memories here?”

“Like what?”

He moved to press his lips to her ear, all the more better to whisper his plans to her like the delicate secret it was.

“Like if I ate you out so good the only thing you can remember about this place is the time you had to try not to shout my name.”

Sometimes she looked at him with wide eyes when he would say things like that. His girlfriend was an absolute vixen, but it always seemed to surprise her that he could do the same. He was definitely the softer, more reserved one of the two, but that didn’t mean he couldn’t be open with just had badly he wanted her always. But then she would grin at him a lot like how she was now, and it always led to good things. Very. Good. Things.

“You’re high right now.” She mumbled as he climbed his way on top of her body.

He was already working on the button to her jeans but sent a lazy smile up to her from above.

“Absolutely. Now be a good girl and open wide for me.”

***

He watched her hug her family as this sort of bittersweet moment. Her brothers all rallied around her, sweeping her up in their arms. It was love, and love was complicated and messy and deeply impacted by the circumstances one occupied. But, it was their love, and if there was anything he’d learned from their time there was that love could be good and bad simultaneously. When he shook the hands of all of her brothers for a final time, he got the sense that much wouldn’t change. She would always love every single one of them, but if she had her way, and she would have her way, they wouldn’t be visiting here again soon. And if it meant that she would be happy; he was absolutely okay with that.

In the car they sit for a moment in silence, nothing but the sound of the heater filling the space. She looks a little overwhelmed, a little tired, but she’s also smiling. So he figures it’s as good a time as any to do what he’d been planning.

“Hey can I...can I give you one of your presents right now?” He murmured.

She’d been lying her head against the headrest but now she fluttered her lashes at him in interest.

“Sure. I thought you wanted to wait until we got to your parents’ house though?”

“Yea. No, I did, but uh...I wanted to give you this one in private.”

She grinned. “Is it a sex thing?”

He snorted and pressed a hand against his heart in mock disturbance

“Jesus, y/n, no it’s not! I’m trying to be sentimental here and you’re ruining it.”

She pressed her lips together to try to mask her smile and it only made her even more adorable.

“Sorry. Sorry. My bad. Please continue.”

He rolled his eyes playfully but reached over her to grab the box from the glove department. It was a smooth satin box, long and rectangular. He turned so that their bodies were close to one another and rested the box on his thigh as he took her hands in his.

“I just...this year has been the most incredible year of my life. Not in a gloaty way but my music has never been better--there’s the grammys and we sold out the Rogers centre and all of the festivals, and I’ve just been working as hard as can ya know? It’s been incredible and yet...you’re my favorite part of this year.”

A snort came past her lips like she couldn’t believe that and so he squeezed down harder on her fingers.

“No, listen. This has been the most incredible year of my life, but it’s also been the hardest. And I haven’t really been able to deal with it all very well. I’ve just sort of kept pushing and kept working but you . . . you’ve become my best friend. And you make me appreciate it all. And honestly every time i flew home this year I couldn't sit still on the plane because I knew as soon as I landed I might get to see you. I know we haven’t been friends super long, and we’ve dated even less than that but I can’t imagine my life without you, sweetheart. I--I love you so much and I just want to make you happy, okay? Always.”

“Shawn.” She mumbled letting her hands fall to where their fingers were intertwined on her lap.

He reached for the box and settled it on her knee instead, flipping the lid to reveal its contents. They were two necklaces, sterling silver, and each of them were tiny swallows. He’d thought about it a thousand times, had almost returned them and gotten something else dozens, but when she gasped and her hands came to cover his mouth, he thought just maybe he might have gotten it right.

His fingers trembled slightly as he lifted one of the tiny birds into his palm.

“I thought it might be pretentious and annoying and stupid.” He sighed softly. “But, I know how much you like the pennant my grandmother gave me, and I know that my swallow is your favorite tattoo. And I know that...next year is gonna be so crazy for me, and for us, so I thought if we both had these that you would know I’ll always come back to you. We’ll uh--we’ll always come back to each other.”

Seconds feel like minutes, like hours, when you’re trying to do something nice for the person you love. It’s either an incredible gift, or the dumbest thing ever, and he genuinely couldn’t tell which. They’re sitting in the middle of a snowy driveway in the middle of a nowhere town in Ontario, and he’s professing his love for her with a gift, and she’s absolutely silent. And then she begins to cry and his heart is pounding in his chest and he doesn’t know what the hell he’s supposed to do.

“Did I--Did I fuck it up? Shit, shit it’s dumb. Look, I’m so sorry. I can fix it though. I can send it back and I can get you something else, just don’t--don’t cry!  Please, baby don’t cry!”

She brings her hands up to cover her face and he wonders if a man has ever been dumped in his own vehicle before. Surely, that would be a new one.

“UGH!” She groans something that sounds vaguely flemmy. “That is the sweetest thing in the whole entire world. I cannot believe you right now.”

He collapsed against the car seat, his hand coming up to press against his heart and make sure it hadn’t exploded. His girlfriend was slightly dramatically and he was all here for it when it wasn’t giving him a heart attack.

“You don’t hate it?” He checked.

Her eyes were still covered but now her lips were trembling and tears were oozing down her cheeks.

“No I don’t hate it, dammit. That’s so fucking sweet. My heart, Shawn, my heart!”

When he went to pull her hands away from her face, she was genuinely a sight to behold. Her eyes were red and puffy, her cheeks tear stained, and her lips had somehow become more red. Maybe it was a bit sadistic, but she was beautiful. And so he kissed her, the saltiness of her tears touching his lips. She wrapped her arms around his neck, his slipping around her back in the tiny space of his jeep. Though there had been nothing but absolute fear and terror just moments before, now his heart was full, warm. She had that effect on him. He figured it meant he was just as gone on her as he thought himself to be.

“Will you put it on for me?” She whispered sniffling.

He fumbled embarrassingly with the clasp, his fingers not built for tiny metal pieces, but eventually managed to secure it around her neck. When the swallow nestle along her throat, she pressed her fingers against the smooth metal and smiled at him lovingly.

“It’s beautiful. Thank you, Shawn.”

He shook his head pressing another kiss to her cheek.

“Anything for you.” He mumbled. “Anything.”

She insisted on putting his around his neck as well. There’s an extremely cheesy moment where he presses his fingers against the bird along her throat and she does the same for him, but it doesn’t feel cheesy in the slightest. It feels important. It feels like maybe they’re deeper into their relationship than even either of them could have guessed.

When they arrived at his parent’s place again for Christmas day, his Mum notices their necklaces almost immediately. She doesn’t ask any questions, she just looks at him like she knows something that he doesn’t. It’s a smile of a mother who knows her child better than they know themselves. And he wonders if she knows that he loves her more than anything else in the world, because that’s what it feels like for him in the moment. But he just hugs her and lets her kiss his forehead instead.

Taglist: @kitykatnumber @lou-and-me @ourlittleshawnie @mutuallynotmutual @wanderingmendes @peacedolantwins2 @chels-nyc @illloveyouforever1 @justbeingoceana  @hayyitsfayy @claredolphinbear24  @september-lace @grittyisathot

[orionsangel86]

Season 14 Wishlist

Alrighty then! As per the last few season’s, each autumn before the season premier I will write a wishlist of things that hopefully will happen in the coming season, which I will then go through once the season is over.

For those of you curious:

Here is my wishlist for season 12 and here is my season 12 wishlist review

Here is my wishlist for season 13 and here is my season 13 wishlist review

Now as a slight disclaimer I need to stress that this isn’t meta, or me promising anything to happen (since I’m not a showrunner nor psychic) and is purely meant for fun - having said that most of the items on my wishlist are at least somewhat realistic wishes and within the realms (at least in my opinion) of actually happening.

So without further rambling here we go:

A decent arc for Michael!Dean. Yes, we all expect it to only last 3 episodes. which I find deeply disappointing. I would prefer if things are not as they seem and it turns out to last far longer than that.

Scenes inside Dean’s head. Like we got with both Cas and Sam when they were possessed, I really want to know where Michael has got Dean stashed away inside his head - and exactly what kind of experience that is for him. I can think of a whole bunch of different ways that could go - will Michael put Dean through hell? Or will he distract him the way of the Djinn with his idea of heaven? I am extremely excited by this idea and hope they don’t pass on the potential.

The missing scene from 13x23 when Dean said yes to Michael. There was definitely more to that and I hope so much we will see it - though I don’t think this is particularly likely.

Cas’s grief. Obviously. Last year I was all about Dean’s grief arc. This year, I need Cas’s to be just as bad. This is 10 years since the original story. Stopping Michael and changing allegiance to stand with Dean was Cas’s origin story - Remember how he reacted in season 5 when Dean was thinking about saying yes to Michael? Oh ho ho I can’t even begin to imagine how this will affect Cas. I want this to be a mirror of last year, and far worse than season 10. 

Sam’s continued leadership role. Now where I want to see Cas absolutely broken with grief over Dean’s possession, what I think would compliment it perfectly is Sam’s fearsome determination and functional leadership. It would be a great way to show how far the brothers have come to breaking the toxic codependency which has bound them to each other - that Sam is capable of functioning without Dean and without immediately trying to sell his soul or give his life for his brother. 

Sam and Cas working together. One of the things that I really hated about the start of season 10, was that without Dean around, Sam and Cas’s relationship just fell apart, and Sam was made to look pretty much like a douche by the show implying he had kicked Cas out of the bunker and blamed him for breaking his shoulder?!? (I found the whole thing very out of character for Sam but then destiel’s continued refusal to become canon tends to make Sam look occasionally douchey - but that is a meta for another day). Give me Sam and Cas as a team. Supporting each other in their grief and acting like the brothers (in-law) that they are.

Jack and Cas father/son bonding time - I mean I saw the promo and it looks like Jack is gonna be grounded for a little while... >.> but once he has written 100 lines of “I will not suggest killing my dad in front of my father” I think Cas will forgive him. I’d like to see Cas trying to teach Jack human things or mundane tasks with Dean watching them with a fond expression!

Addressing Dean’s abuse trauma - this one has been going around on tumblr recently so I’m latching on to other wonderful meta a bit here, but since last season explored Sam’s Lucifer trauma (and to an extent Cas’s Naomi trauma), it would be fitting if this Michael!Dean arc is followed up with an arc of recovery for Dean, not just from Michael, but from everything he has suffered since the apocalypse.

More seeing “behind the mask” with Dean. I think he has already massively grown into himself and out of his fathers shadow, but I’d just like more examples like with the chick flicks and the cucumber water.

Cas truly breaking free from heaven. Now I think that the ideal situation would be that Cas is the one to fix heaven, and that he leaves the angels by choice, and with them all respecting him and being thankful to him. But Cas needs to start to break free from that duty and obligation that he still feels to heaven. Even in season 13 he carried that guilt, and whilst this is more endgame stuff, I desperately want to see more progress on this. 

More hints towards Cas desiring human things and human feelings and basically desiring humanity for himself (no jokes guys, this time I DON’T mean Dean). I am a staunch human!Cas endgame girl after all. The show spent a lot of time in season 9 and 10 building on this for Cas and then it went a bit quiet. I’d like to see those threads picked up again.

In fact, when it comes to Cas, how about he starts answering some of those hundreds of unanswered questions that have been thrown at him since Carver era? How about he finds his place, where he belongs and AS WHAT in general? Cas, you have a home now and a family. Stop lingering in doorways. 

Sam showing us more of his personality. I think now that his Lucifer trauma has been somewhat addressed, Sam should be a bit lighter and more carefree. I’d like to know some more about him other than his obsession with serial killers which is frankly a worrying hobby Sam!

Mary and Cas bonding - in fact I just want to see all of the rest of Dean’s family bonding with Cas more. I want more knowing looks from Mary and even a conversation about the topic - oh wouldn’t that be a dream!

Dean coming out of the closet. Yes yes I know I know. Every year... But it is 20gayteen and next year is 20BITEEN and dammit the world is full of rainbows right now - Bert and Ernie made it official... Why can’t Dean Winchester? I’m totally cool with someone slipping THIS to Dabb. I won’t even ask for credit. ;)

Last year I wanted Sam to build on his relationships outside of Dean and we did pretty well last year with that. But of course, I want more. Maybe some Sam x Rowena? I’m game. 

On that note WITCH!SAM. I am still a huge lover of Sam practicing magick. It’s a story line with so much potential.

More badass ladies kicking ass. Aww man we were kinda blessed with this last year weren’t we? Keep it up show. Please keep it up.

Billie continuing to play a large role as Death. I find her captivating and want more.

Wayward Sisters returning. It still hurts, but we need to know what happens next.

JODY AND CAS NEED TO MEET GODDAMMIT. Also I want Cas to reunite with Claire again.

As per last year: The return of the mixtape. BRING BACK THE MIXTAPE (yup I’m gonna wish for it until I get it).

Please dress Cas up. The closest we got last year was the cowboy hat and the dreadful nazi uniform of AU Cas. Why can’t we have him in plaid? PLEASE.

Absolutely no Lucifer, Lucifer vessel or any hint of Mark Pellegrino. Plus no Kentucky fried chicken pantomime villains either. I’ll be happy if season 14 is free from this nonsense.

Saving the best for last, what do I always wish for above all else? You guessed it - DESTIEL. Do I want it to be canon? Well yes eventually of course. But in season 14 my wish is for their story to continue as it did in early season 13. More obvious destiel content, more of destiel built into the narrative and ideally, made explicit. A love confession? Even if only to a third party? That is undeniably romantic. Zero “no homo’s” would be nice. I just wish for further development on the destiel narrative. That is all. 

As always feel free to add to this with your own wishes! 

BRING ON SEASON 14!! :D

[so-shiny-so-chrome]

Witness: KirkyPet

Creator name (AO3): KirkyPet 

Creator name (Tumblr): kirkypet 

Link to creator works: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KirkyPet/works

Q: Why the Mad Max Fandom?

A: I was actually quite fixated on Fury Road after watching it on DVD. I didn’t expect to particularly like it - I’d never seen the previous Mad Max movies (I finally have!) - but I was transfixed. And I didn’t particularly ship Furiosa and Max until the haemothorax/transfusion scene (although then I very much did). There were just so many layers of detail and backstory there waiting to be explored, because so little was actually said or explained. It’s like a neutron star of fic-fodder. And I didn’t discover ao3 til summer 2016 so I spent a full year wandering around like a lost soul. So, yeah. Quite a huge deal for me really.

Q: What do you think are some defining aspects of your work? Do you have a style? Recurrent themes?

A: Music. Minor characters looking on and commenting on the protagonists (big fan of Thomas Hardy’s more comedic efforts, where this happens a lot). Reasonably happy endings.

Q: Which of your works was the most fun to create? The most difficult? Which is your most popular? Most successful? Your favourite overall?

A: Maybe the small town modern AU (Ordinary People), because it was a nice change from the Wasteland setting. I’m not very Wasteland-minded at all. But the Bladerunner AU (Do Androids Dream etc) and the new Firefly AU are lots of fun because the two sets of movie worlds mesh together way better than I’d expected. 

The most difficult? - My Wasteland headcanon stuff. It’s too fluffy and not remotely violent which doesn’t really ring true. I’m very aware that my Furiosa is hardly ever violent, or my Max particularly mad. But that’s the great thing about fanfiction - the infinite versions of characters and scenarios. Surprisingly the Blues Brothers AU is quite tricky. I can’t quite make Jake Blues and Furiosa the same person. But it’s an excuse to listen to great tunes. And Jessie will make a comeback in that one though (she’s not dead, I should make that clear). 

On the old kudos-to-hits ratio, the Firefly AU is taking off surprisingly well, but it’s quite smut-focused so that might well account for it ;) early days yet. Bladerunner AU is doing well for a multi-chapter. Up Around The Bend (an oldie, the escape from the Citadel) is hanging in there. 

Most successful? I’m happy enough with all of them, except maybe I Kissed A Girl. Please don’t read that. Favourite overall - It’s a toss-up between Ordinary People (a chance to explore my headcanon in a modern small town setting) and the Bladerunner AU (it makes me weep). 

Q: How do you like your wasteland? Gritty? Hopeful? Campy? Soft? Why?

A: Hopeful and silly and everyone has access to a record player somehow. This is why I stick to writing AUs these days. But I’ll happily read all of the above!!! And entirely intend to!

Q: Walk us through your creative process from idea to finished product. What's your prefered environment for creating? How do you get through rough patches?

A: Watch a film, browse tumblr, listen to music, get an idea. Have a good think about it, think about it some more, find a starting point, write it down, go from there. Maybe stick a draft on tumblr if I’m not sure if it’s going to fly. Write it anyway. 

For OCs, figure out what someone looks like. That’s weirdly essential for me. Zal (Furiosa’s Dad) is Ed Harris, Young Val (Furiosa and Max’s grownup daughter) is Alicia Vikander and Toots (rescued-kid-turned-Wasteland-son-in-law) is Didier Drogba (bit of a blast from the past but hey). I was getting nowhere with Blues Mothers Jessie until I recast her as Sofia Boutella (because if Max is getting a generational update, she needs one too). And Firefly AU’s Mister Jobassa is Jakob Oftebro. All very pretty people, but what are you gonna do? But they’re only these people in MY head - they can be whoever the reader wants them to be. Oh, and Pin from Ordinary People was 100% an actual real tour guide I met on holiday once. 

Preferred environment? Usually while half asleep in bed, or walking, or In the gym, or watching tv - world building seems to be something that happens away from the keyboard. Writing itself is exclusively on my phone so can and does happen anywhere at all. Rough patches are usually caused by guilt that I’m not spending enough time on the day job :P

Q: What (if any) music do you listen to for help getting those creative juices flowing?

A: I listen to music all the time anyway, mainly upbeat pre-90s tunes. Disco, funk, ska, motown, anything like that. And it always find its way into the writing. Sometimes artificially (where I’m on a song-lyrics-as-title theme - it took ages for some of the Wasteland fics) but most times it can help shape the story in a BIG way. I can’t listen to certain songs now without reliving a chapter or a whole fic - Dionne Warwick’s Do You Know The Way To San José is Bladerunner!Furiosa’s Green Place song, and Ash’s Angel Interceptor is StarTrek!Max’s flying music - it’s noisy enough but also speaks to me about a longing to not be alone in the universe. Concrete and Clay is smalltown!Max’s bittersweet lament for Jessie and Twistin’ The Night Away is the final party scene in Cheedo’s update of The Rivals. Some fics wouldn’t have been written at all if it wasn’t for a particular song. The Black Keys’ Heavy Soul was my original Wasteland Furiosa/Max ship theme back in 2015, before I’d even heard of ao3 - that’s the closest I’ve come to a song fic. Caleb was only Caleb because of a line in Symarip’s Skinhead Moonstomp, and I was so desperate to write a fic with Leo Sayer’s You Make Me Feel Like Dancing In it that it was the final excuse for a whole modern mirrorverse to my Wasteland headcanon series. Bet you’re sorry you asked now. But I’ll have to go and put together a Kirkyverse OST list.

Q: What is your biggest challenge as a creator?

A: To put the damn thing down and walk away. To not assume it’s awful if I don’t get a kudos in the first thirty hits. Thumb cramp from phone-typing.

Q: How have you grown as a creator through your participation in the Mad Max Fandom? How has your work changed? Have you learned anything about yourself?

A: I didn’t write at all before the Mad Max fandom. Apart from a ghost story when I was about seven (it did win a prize tbh) and a truly god awful Stephen King rip-off when I was fourteen (which makes me nauseous from embarrassment when I think of it). So a fair bit, it’d probably be fair to say. It would be impossible not to, you know, from zero :) My work has changed from spinoffs of inspirational fics (thanks Squid!) to ‘well, I suppose I’ve got a head canon, let’s see if I can make this work’ to ‘goddammit I’ll finish this if it kills me’. Then I missed my exit on the Roundabout of Fic Endings and had to go round again in a modern AU mirror verse. Now it’s all movie mashups, which is lots of fun and probably never-ending. During which time I have learned that crossovers are my favourite to write. And that writing fanfic is probably not a temporary fad :)

Q: Which character do you relate to the most, and how does that affect your approach to that character? Is someone else your favourite to portray? How has your understanding of these characters grown through portraying them?

A: I don’t really have a favourite tbh. They’re all their own people and do their own thing. Writing them is very dependent on their environment, and it’s often surprising how they behave and where they end up. It feels a bit like they’re on Whose Line Is It Anyway?

Q: Do you ever self-insert, even accidentally?

A: Hah yes. The first one was Zephyr the annoying visitor in Witches and Ogres. Young Val’s social awkwardness in As was very much on loan from me. 

Q: Do you have any favourite relationships to portray? What interests you about them?Furiosa and Max are pretty much always there - sometimes it’s probably platonic, and sometimes there’s a third person involved (nothing posted yet but but but). It depends on the fic.

Q: Do you prefer to create in one defined chronology or do your works stand alone? Why or why not?

A: One big long chronology for the headcanon series (childhood to old age), then a whole bunch of little universes for everything else.

Q: To break or not to break canon? Why?

A: Not to break, as much as I can. But it depends.

Q: Share some headcanons.

A: Furiosa was never actually a wife - she was captured but dodged the whole Vault experience. Max is the original Max, of Jessie and Sprog fame. Toecutter was Joe’s younger self - he scooted around on motorbikes and raised hell before deciding to settle down and take the Citadel. AU Toast and Dag are twins (from a shady mob family). Furiosa’s Dad is a friendly Wasteland bandit. 

Q: If you work with OCs walk us through your process for creating them. Who are some of your favourites?

A: They’re supplementary characters who make the plots fit together, and sources of conflict or humour (usually both). I think I like Ordinary People’s Alexa and Mallory best. Although the Irish War Boy crew in Beyond the Pale were fun to write. Ace’s trio of love interests (Brick, Big Dave and Caleb/Pin) are a consistent theme. Sometimes I steal characters from other sources (stand up Christopher Brookmyre) when it’s convenient.

Q: What sparks your many wonderful AUs?

A: Movies, tv, gifs, tumblr prompts and general chitchat (thankyou btw!!!)

Q: A lot of your fics are light-hearted and hopeful, which is great to see for the apocalyptic Mad Max world. Your thoughts on that? What is it about the characters that inspires you to reframe them?

A: I just really like comedy and am committed to winkling it into every fictional scenario whether it’s appropriate or not. Glad people don’t hate it!

Q: Who are some works by other creators inside and outside of the fandom that have influenced your work?

A: Well, it was Squid’s ( @sacrificethemtothesquid )Length and Breadth of Fury Road that got me out of the starting blocks! Christopher Brookmyre’s The Sacred Art of Stealing was a big influence on my headcanon series, as was a particular Coronation Street storyline from some years back :) 

Q: Tell us about a current WIP or planned project.

A: Blues Brothers AU series (Sweet Home Chicago) -Wasteland Star Trek First Contact AU (Angel Interceptor) -Firefly AU (Our Mister Jobassa) -His Dark Materials AU (unnamed as yet, just brewing in my head, hope it just stays there for the meantime) -Will combine all the headcanon works into one long fic sometime. That’s everything from Witches and Ogres through to Ordinary People. Probably be called ‘All the Things that I’ve Done’ (basically the two lives of Furiosa: Wasteland and mirrorverse).

Thank you @kirkypet

[letmetellyouaboutmyfeels]

3x06 Missing Scene

So we’re all screaming after the latest @timeless-season-three episode, which included Houdini informing Lucy about something the rest of us have probably guessed for a while, and had Jiya telling Rufus that “Lucy’s over at Flynn’s tonight.” Given that Lucy and Flynn had a tumultuous time during their trip to Roanoke in 3x05 and the ending hug... well, between the two episodes, this totally self-indulgent ficlet was born. Tagging @extasiswings for reasons and of course @qqueenofhades because she’s the reason this whole thing exists in the first place.

This fic is rated Explicit, so you’ll find it below the cut.

She can’t sleep.

That’s not unusual nowadays. Especially now that she’s sharing with Jiya—the poor girl doesn’t like to talk about it but more often than not she wakes up crying in the middle of the night and Lucy crawls over, holding her quietly until it’s over. She knows she’s a poor substitute for the person Jiya really wants to be held by, but it has to be better than nothing.

And besides. If she’s being honest… it reminds her of Amy.

But tonight Jiya’s not sleeping at all, and Lucy can’t handle the suffering of both of them in the same small stuffy room, and her claustrophobia is making her feel like she can’t breathe, and she can’t stop thinking about Flynn.

Garcia.

She nearly lost him. Metaphorically, and then literally, dragged away, sacrificing himself for her while she could do nothing but watch as he was taken. He could’ve been shot, his body dumped into the water, not even a grave and she never would’ve seen him again.

The thought makes her throat close up.

She can’t quite articulate what he is to her. Part of it, she knows, is pure fear. Cowardice. She’s lost too many people—Rufus, Amy, Mom, even Wyatt in a way—and she isn’t sure if she has the strength to speak her heart and then lose someone again.

The other part of it is that she honestly can’t find the words. There’s always been something between them, a spark as deadly as it is exhilarating, and she can’t help but feel the heat of it as it burns when they’re together. It’s intense, and should probably scare her, but it doesn’t. It never has.

But is it—

She can’t finish the sentence, even in her own head.

But she can’t be in this room a second longer, so she gets up, and goes down the hall, and knocks on Flynn’s door.

He opens it with a weary expression on his face, although there’s something warm in his eyes, something she dares to think of now as affection. “Lucy.”

“Garcia.” Now that she’s said his first name once, it seems as though she can’t stop, at least in private. “I was hoping… I could just, spend some time with you?”

“…spend some time.”

She nods.

He gives her an odd look, then opens the door further to let her inside, swinging it softly shut behind her.

“And what did this spending some time entail?”

“I… I’m not here for advice, or anything, I just…” She feels helpless, out of her depth, drowning. “I just need you.”

Flynn blinks at her. “Uh…”

“That came out wrong!” Oh, God, she can feel herself blushing. “I just meant—you—”

The truth is… maybe it didn’t come out that wrong after all. She’s long been aware that Flynn’s generally a three on the personality scale thanks to his near-magical ability to piss off everyone around him, but on the attractiveness scale…

Well. He’s far from hurting.

All right, so maybe he’s annoyingly hot, so what of it? She’s not blind.

And, God, she did nearly lose him, and there have been moments where she’s thought that maybe, the way he was—talking about her and looking at her, that perhaps—

She realizes that the silence has now stretched on long enough to become uncomfortable.

Flynn, at least, looks amused rather than annoyed. “You just meant…” he prompts.

Oh, fuck it. She never does anything reckless, she’s always the good girl, and he’s sexy, and the one person she feels like she can trust and be herself with, and she almost lost him, he almost died and she never even got to finish apologizing, she left so many things unsaid—

She gets up onto her tiptoes, yanks him down by his shirt front, and kisses him.

Flynn does a spectacular impression of a statue.

Something breaks in her chest and she worries—oh God maybe she had it wrong, of course he’s still in love with Lorena, or at least not into her, and she’s crossed a boundary and lost a friend and—

She makes a small sound, she doesn’t mean to but she does as she pulls away, and something about that makes Flynn spring to life. He gets an arm around her waist and hauls her against him, his free hand sliding into her hair to tangle in her curls and tilt her head to the side, giving them both a better angle, as his lips slide against hers and his tongue flicks out, parting the seam of her mouth. She arches up, opening her mouth on a sigh, and for a moment it’s almost soft, slow, the two of them exploring each other for the first time.

Then she remembers why she’s here in the first place. She can feel Flynn’s heartbeat underneath her fingers but it almost stopped, it would be so easy to make it stop—and then she feels hungry, demanding, desperate, and the kiss turns from soft into something else entirely.

She shoves at him, forces him backwards, and Flynn goes easily, acquiesces as he always does to her orders, even the unspoken ones. They land on the bed and she practically claws at his clothes trying to get them off, squirming in his lap, feeling him harden underneath her. A shudder works through her. He feels—well, he feels like he’s six foot four and proportionate.

She wants him inside her so badly she’s dizzy with it.

Her hands finally get underneath his shirt, finally get to skim over the warm planes of his skin, and of course that’s when Flynn’s brain comes back online. He pulls back, panting, and oh, well-kissed and desperate is a very good look on him.

“Lucy.” He says her name like nobody else. “What—”

She cups his face in her hands. “You almost died,” she whispers. “And there are so many—I mean I’ve lost—” Words feel so inadequate. “Garcia,” she ends up whispering, her voice cracking.

He runs a hand through her hair, his thumb brushing her cheek. There’s so much in his eyes, things she doesn’t dare name, and she sort of knows she’s in denial but there’s only so much she can handle right now and she can’t afford to break, she can’t.

“If it really means that much to you,” he whispers, his accent thicker than usual and rather spoiling the lighthearted tone he’s going for, “then I’ll do my best to stick around.”

She makes a noise that’s a laugh and a sob at the same time, and she kisses him again, and this time he doesn’t stop her when she yanks his shirt off.

Oh, fuck, yes, he’s all hard muscle, his skin dotted through with scars, and she doesn’t waste a second getting her mouth on them, feeling them with her tongue. Flynn inhales sharply and then she’s being flipped, her legs spread as she lands on her back on the bed, her loose flannel pajama pants getting yanked down as Flynn gets his mouth on her thighs.

She has to clap a hand over her mouth, surprise making her cry out a little. She’s not ashamed, she’s a grown woman goddammit, but this bunker has enough relationship drama already without adding her and Flynn’s midnight rendezvous to the mix. Flynn chuckles against her skin, dark and self-satisfied, and then he nips at it and proceeds to lick his way into what feels like the very heart of her.

Dear. God.

It might have been a while since Flynn was with Lorena, but he’s forgotten nothing about how to do this. He slides his tongue in and out of her and all she can do is get a handful of his hair and try not to buck him off the bed as she loses all motor functions and the world goes white.

Flynn pulls away from her, his mouth red and slick with her, his eyes questioning as if he’s checking to make sure she really did, in fact, enjoy that orgasm or if all the writhing and tugging at his hair was for show.

She sits up, tugging her shirt up and off and finishing kicking her pants to the floor, then crawls back to him, undoing his own pants and then seating herself in his lap again. She rather likes his lap. She plans to spend a lot more time here from now on.

“I don’t—”

“I took my shot,” she assures him. Being on the pill when you’re time traveling is a bitch to keep track of so she switched to something a bit more permanent way back when she was still living at home, when things—dear God she can’t believe she’s thinking this—actually had some feeling of normalcy.

Flynn hesitates a moment more, then nods and lets her wrap her hand around him.

Mmm, yes, he’s thick, and she takes pleasure in playing with him a little, watching the way Flynn’s mouth falls open and his eyes go wide and glazed. He works his hand between, gets his fingers in her, as if to double check that she’s really sure, she’s ready, and then he’s carefully parting her and she’s sinking down onto him and all the air gets punched out of her lungs.

She tips forward and rests her forehead against his, the two of them breathing together for a moment as they both adjust. She wraps her arms around his neck, wondering if she can take all of him into her, if she can somehow actually make magic happen and brand him, mark him, so that his life is tied to hers and he will remain alive so long as she does.

It certainly feels like something deep, some kind of witchcraft, as she tilts her head and their mouths meet again. She can taste herself on his tongue as she sucks on it, as his teeth scrape against her lower lip, and at last, as if by silent pact, they both begin to move.

She presses down onto him as he thrusts up, and it’s a bit shallow but good, so good, gliding along and pressing against those nerves as she gets used to him, opens up more for him. Her mouth falls open and she begins to breathe by gasps, Flynn’s chest heaving against hers, their skin growing slick with sweat as their bodies slide against each other. Her nails dig into his back and he groans, thrusts harder, and with that it’s like a dam breaking loose. He falls back and she digs her knees into the mattress, fucks down onto him as hard and fast as she can, drawing him into her and marking his chest in glorious stripes of red as he moves his palms up to cup her breasts, then slides them down to rub his thumb against her clit, and it feels like she’s at the center of a whirlwind, like she’s the storm itself and dragging him in with her, like maybe she—what they are together—is a union at once unholy and fantastical.

Flynn is, in his own intense and unconventional way, ever the gentleman, and she can feel him straining to hold back as he fucks her, touching her in all the places that he learns can make her moan, until she’s coming a second time and clenching around him, her head falling back. She collapses forward onto him and he wraps an arm around her lower back, thrusts deep into her a few last, messy times, before she can feel him stiffening and spilling within her.

She feels completely, thoroughly fucked, and she loves it.

They breathe harshly, covered in sweat and, in Flynn’s case, claw marks. She isn’t sure what to say, what to do now. All she knows is that she doesn’t want to leave him.

He slides out of her eventually, growing soft, and they manage to clean themselves up somewhat. She doesn’t bother with her pants, just tugs her shirt over her head, and Flynn gets his pants back on but arches his eyebrows in amusement and obeys when she shakes her head as he grabs his shirt, dropping it dramatically to the floor. She can’t help but laugh a little at that, and his smile turns into a full on beam of sunshine, as if he can’t believe that he’s actually managed to make her joyful, if only for a moment.

She isn’t sure how to ask if she should stay, but Flynn seems to take it for granted, sliding into bed on his side and pulling back the blankets for her. “Would you call that ‘gentle and responsive’?” she teases as she slides in next to him.

Flynn snorts, tugging the blankets over both of them as she unashamedly snuggles into his side. “Looks like the journal lied, then.”

She chokes on her own spit. “I—the—it doesn’t say that in there!”

Flynn laughs so hard he makes the bed shake. “I’m sorry—the look on your face—”

She smacks him on the chest, uncaring that she’s hitting the marks she made with her nails. “You asshole.”

Flynn just hums, looking smug, pulling her back into his side. Lucy bites her lip. There are things she knows they need to talk about. Things she’s kept back from him. The ghost of her night with Wyatt hovers over her shoulder, reminding her what happened the last time she gave into her desire for someone. And there is the whole… matter of her family to consider, the truth she’s too scared to tell him.

But Flynn is warm and solid around her, and he plays with her hair as she nestles against him, and hums off-key under his breath, and she’s so tired, and she just wants to hold onto this with him as long as she can.

Even if she knows that they will, in fact, have to talk about what they are to each other, and about what they might feel. Even if she knows she’s sort of running on borrowed time.

Instead for now she sleeps, sleeps in his arms and feels like she’s not alone.

[bettsfic]

Betty how did you know writing was it for you? I've never had anything I was passionate enough about to make a career out of and it feels like you were able to aim your arrow at what you wanted and make it happen. Was there any questions you asked yourself that made it obvious?

great question, anon. i feel like there’s a lot of pressure to know what your passion is, and your purpose in life, and what brings you joy, etc, and the reality isn’t like that. at least, it wasn’t for me. i have a cousin who has wanted to be a bassist since he was ten years old. he eats, sleeps, and breathes bass. he’s 23 now and the most popular bassist in our city, and he’s happy and thriving. 

but like. that doesn’t happen a lot. 

for me, i had boxed myself into a corner. i was 25, and i enjoyed writing, but i didn’t think i could make a career out of it (i still believe that). i was working at the bank, and i’d been invited to a company retreat in cleveland, where i spent 3 days training on a new system. during that time, a woman who had my same job was retiring, and we had a party for her. she’d worked at the bank, in the same position i was in, for 46 years. she closed commercial mortgages for 46 years. 

that was when i knew i had to do something. i didn’t know what yet, but i had to force myself out of the stability and comfort i’d found, and into anything else. i knew if i didn’t move, i’d die at the bank. i’d live an easy, comfortable, boring life, and the bank would never fire me, and they’d certainly never promote me, and i’d blink and suddenly 46 years would pass and i too would be retiring. i found success and security, and i lived an easy life, which is the exact opposite of the millennial ethos, and i had to set it down and walk away, because it wasn’t right for me. 

i never made a conscious decision to “pursue writing.” i only made a decision to move from the place i was. i knew i wanted to go back to school, so when i started researching grad schools, i looked at counseling, education, i/o psych, epidemiology, law school, med school -- i cast a very wide net. i chose the mfa because it didn’t give me extreme anxiety when i read over the course descriptions. in fact it sounded fun. i’d get to teach, and write, and take what i already enjoyed doing seriously. and i thought, okay, even if this isn’t a career, i’ve been miserable at the bank for ten years. don’t i deserve two years of fun? 

so that’s all it was for me. i promised myself i’d dedicate 2 years of my life to a hobby i enjoyed, so i would be actually good at something. i’d never been good at anything before.  

it was while i was there that i realized it was absolutely a right place for me to be. not the right place, but a right place. i recognize i could get just as much emotional satisfaction out of a really good counseling program, or just as much creative exercise with an education program. but an mfa is what i was the most qualified for, so i went for it. even now, having applied for phds, i’m facing the question: do i really want to stay in academia (as a student) for four more years? i might love writing, but writing has multiple branches of Work (academia, publishing, etc), and that’s where i hesitate. even writing, as much as i love it, becomes a chore when you attribute money to it. i love teaching too, but even then, i question -- do i want to be doing this *forever*?? the answer is: no, and i don’t have to commit to that anyway. more on that in a sec.

what made me realize that writing was My Thing is the idea that i would do it regardless of success. i need to write. not-writing has never been an option for me. if i take away novel writing, i would write essays. take away essays, and i’d write poems. take away poems, and i’d write journal entries. i don’t need the promise of publication to want to write. i don’t even need read. i could spend my entire life writing for myself. that writing would look different than if i wrote for an audience, and i wouldn’t be as happy as i am sharing my work with others, but it’s still my baseline existence. when i don’t have anything to do, i write. it gives me energy, and makes me feel good, and it’s fun. i know i’m the exception to the rule -- most writers i know drag their feet. they see writing as work, a depleting force. it’s never been like that for me.

writing was also the thing i assumed everyone wanted to do. like it was so much a part of me that i thought it was a part of everyone else too, the same way, if you’re a wlw, you can grow up assuming that everyone is attracted to girls, because who wouldn’t be? and you realize shit i’m gay. so for me being a writer was like, goddammit i’m never getting rid of this am i. 

i guess i also want to say, as a sidebar -- there’s no such thing as a career. a career is a flawed concept that lays the mental foundation for staying stagnant in a workforce for 46 years, and allows you to make an identity out of labor. you do not have to choose a career. your only obligation is to feed yourself -- find the things that give you life. and if the things that give you life don’t also bring you money, then you have to balance that with a job. you do not have to find what you love and commit to it. you don’t have to see the big picture of who you are and the grand work you’re doing on this planet. you don’t owe anyone your greatness. your only goal is to find what thrills you and play with it, let it take you to the next destination. your only job is to keep moving, exploring, asking questions of yourself and the world at large. otherwise, you’ll retire at the bank after closing mortgages for 46 years. careers objectify the human experience. they turn us into machinery. do not let them.  

hobbies, passions, jobs, disciplines -- they don’t have to be the same thing. life doesn’t have to be one long, straight road with no stops or turns, barreling forward as fast as you can go. you can take your time, and have fun, and detour and get lost and go back to the start. your goal doesn’t have to be success, and you never have to decide on a single path. take what you’re into right now and roll with it.