#let him have his ten emotional support cats

[basicallykiyotaka]

Enji has a major inferiority complex and constantly feels the need to prove himself day in and day out when in reality he's a complete coward. He hides behind fake confidence because he's doing the classic fake it til you make it. He became so envious of heroes yet still felt so weak compared to them that part of him gave up and instead raised a child.

He, in fact, loves his family. He truly believed that he could create something happy one day and that fatherhood was going to help his wounds heal, and when all it did was make him even more scared, he pulled his walls back up and demanded control over himself that he never actually had. He didn't want to hurt his family, but he did anyway. He shut out everything that would make him vulnerable and poured all his self loathing into training Shoto.

He most certainly knew, for a long time, that what he was doing was fucked, but when you're in that mental cycle, you can't justify breaking out of it because that's what that kind of fear does to you. This created more self hatred which in turn created more stress which created more anger.

Because there's nothing to relieve it and all his wounds are torn open through Touya dying, he buries himself into the places he knows he can regulate and knows he can feel powerful up until the start of his arc where he finally feels himself calmed down. The urge is satisfied yet it leaves him hollow, and only then can he truly reflect and say out loud that he should have done better.

TL;DR - Enji Todoroki has insecurity issues stemming from not feeling strong enough after his father died which resulted in an unending cycle that took itself out on the people around him.

This is what the subtext and direct text is trying to tell you. The fact I'm even explaining this to people who love him makes me concerned for reading comprehension...

[fourmula1]

winter warmers day 31: NYE countdown

max/daniel. 974 words.

-

Ten:

It’s been a long year. A rough year. There’s been more lows this year than any before and Daniel has spent the last few months trying to figure out how to process the emotions and feelings. The regret, the woe, the sadness of losing something he loves so dearly, and it not even being his fault. He was so close to having it all – the perfect end to his career, one more season back in the Red Bull and then he’d bow out gracefully. And it was yanked out from under him with no warning. It hurt.

Nine:

But it hasn’t been all bad. He’s had a few months, also, to do the things he loves outside of racing. Riding dirt bikes in the California hills. Hanging out with Josh in New York. Spending time in Australia that he hasn’t had the ability to do for over a decade. Connecting with old friends, spending so much time with his niece and nephew, strengthening family ties. He’s developed new concepts for his brand, met Scotty’s little baby, watched a best friend get married. These are all the things life is really about, and Daniel’s glad to have done it all.

Eight:

He's grateful for his family’s unconditional love and the pride his parents have always had in him, no matter what. On the top step of the podium, or being fired mid season, has never mattered to them, and Daniel is grateful for their support. Grateful to be reminded that none of it really matters, in the grand scheme of life. No one will care about how many trophies, or fastest laps, or pole positions he’s got. They’ll remember his smile, and the way he treats people, and how he loves his people. That’s what matters.

Seven:

But that little niggling feeling in his brain won’t stop getting to him. What’s next? Who is Daniel without a race seat? Without that passion and energy for achieving the best he can with the car he’s got? Racing has been his life for nearly 30 years at this point and imagining a life away from it is hard. These few months off haven’t been that unfamiliar – he’d spent the same time away from the sport during winter breaks. The next few months are what’s going to really challenge him, when he isn’t going back to the factory or the sim or Monaco.

Six:

There’s no reason to stay in this absurdly expensive country when he’s not racing, not needing to be in the mix. Packing up his apartment and saying goodbye to this life is hurting him in ways he didn’t imagine it would. Australia has always been home, and the call of Perth in his heart has been a constant longing for over a decade. But Monaco is a piece of his heart too. Leaving the home he’s loved for the last few years. Leaving the sunshine and the harbour and Jimmy’z and his apartment. And Max.

Five:

Max. Leaving Max. Leaving the ease of going upstairs to Max’s apartment and bothering him to come on a run with Daniel. Leaving the countless evenings of take-out and Max’s video games while Daniel scrolled on his phone, content to be in each other’s company. He’ll miss Max entering his apartment unannounced because he’s known the keycode for years at this point. He’ll miss Max dragging Daniel to play padel because he’s got – another – new racket to try. He’s going to miss the ease and comfort of sprawling out on opposite ends of his sofa and listening to Max talk and talk and talk about the races until Daniel starts to doze off, and Max lets himself out, and Daniel realizes he doesn’t want him to go.

Four:

Daniel never wants Max to go, on those easy warm nights. He never wants Max to go when they leave the padel court and part ways in the elevator of their building. He never wants Max to go when he leaves the Red Bull hospitality to go to his own race briefings. He never wants Max to go when it’s just for a moment to check in on the cats before he returns to Daniel’s apartment to hang out for the evening. He never wants Max to go.

Three:

Daniel looks up looks across the room for Max. It’s New Year’s Eve and the party is in full force and Daniel’s spent the last few moments thinking about regrets and hurt and sadness. And suddenly he’s thinking of the future and happiness and what he wants and it hits him all at once that it’s Max. It’s Max, and Max’s laughter and smile and stubbornness and quirks and all of Max. And he’s nowhere to be found as Daniel scans the room.

Two:

He finds Max in his sim room. Where everyone knows well enough not to go. But Daniel knew he’d be in here; quiet, alone, taking a moment to himself to recharge and grab another Red Bull from his mini fridge. He looks up when Daniel opens the door, his smile bright when he realizes who it is. His beautiful, happy, squinty eyes as his whole face scrunches with delight at seeing Daniel.

“It’s you!” Max grins as Daniel closes the door behind him. This is it.

One:

Daniel crosses the room in five steps, hand coming up to curl at Max’s jaw and pull him into a kiss as the party crowd on the other side of the door cheers for the stroke of midnight. It’s a new year. A new chance. A new life. A new love.

“It’s you,” Daniel says as he pulls back, Max staring back at him wide eyed and surprised and flushed; cheeks dusted pretty-pink.

Max leans in to kiss him again, and Daniel knows everything is going to be okay.

[elliesmainhoe]

Flour and Jam

Streamer!Ellie X Fem!Reader

Summary: Yours and ellies attempt at a cooking stream

Contents: fluff, fluff and more fluff, food fight, general chaos.

My Masterlist

Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 (you're here)

"Welcome to my kitchen" Ellie said, looking into the camera that was situated on a tripod resting upon the islands wooden countertops.

User1: New room unlocked 🔓

User2: omg are we cooking?

"Yes we are cooking, thought I'd do something special for you guys to celebrate hitting 500k on YouTube- which is honestly insane."

User3: Been here since 5k on YT 💪

"And due to this being a very special stream I have a very very special person to keep me company!" Hearing your cue, you stepped Infront of the camera "And because I can't trust Ellie to not burn down my house." You add on, smiling mischievously at her annoyed expression.

User4: my favourite person ever 😭

User5: One chance Y/N, plssss

User6: Ima steal Ellie's girl, just you wait and see

User7: omg look at how cute they look together 🥲

User8: The Y/N and Ellie tiktok editors are already screen recording this for later lmao

"Shut-" before Ellie could finish her sentence you pecked her lips- catching her off guard and laughing as you saw the chat go at the speed of light.

User9: Stop I'm so lonely 😭

"Your so lonely? L"

"Ellie! Don't be mean?" You scold her, shoving her shoulder playfully.

"Why?"

"Because I said so, be nice"

"Yes ma'am" Ellie replies, her right hand lifting into a mock salute as she laughs.

"We are going to make a cake. What kind of cake you may be asking?" She spoke, replying to an invisible comment.

"No one asked that baby" you laughed,, reaching up and messing with her hair. Her mouth went to retort but before any words could fall out you cut in front of her "yes I know I'll 'shut up'."

"Were making a 'victoria sponge' cake, because Y/N knows how to make it and there is a higher possiblity it will turn out least half decently" she grins, looking down at the ingredients you'd laid out on the counter. Eggs, flour, sugar, butter, vanilla, cream, jam (jelly if your American), icing sugar and strawberries.

"It'll be great, we'll do so well. I 100% believe we will make an edible Cake" you affirm, lying but trying to be positive.

User10: Uhuh very convincing 💀

User11: manifest it besties

•••••••••

"How the fuck have we managed this?" Ellie laughed out looking down at the mess you two had managed to create.

"I honestly have no idea" you reply looking at the copious amounts of flour and various sticky substances that coated the counters. "It could honestly be a modern art piece" you hummed

User12: Girlie said modern art

User13: #1 modern art hater for life

Ellie began spewing jokes, continuing to crack eggs and whisk, even though you'd told her to stop adding anything ten minutes earlier.

"You really have no regard for my advice, huh?"

"Nope." She said back to you, the familiar annoying grin plastered on her freckled face when she heard your disappointed sigh.

User14: she looks so done lmao 😭

You move out of view of the audience, silently searching for some emotional support for the foreseeable future. You entered the living room and the familiar ball of ginger fluff you were searching for was curled up in the cat tree you and ellie had bought him for his first birthday. After a few seconds of internal conflict on whether to leave him be or disturb him you decided on the latter.

Picking up the grumpy cat, who made his displeasure known by letting out a tired yowl as you cradled him, before coming back into the kitchen. "I needed some emotional support."

User15: Garfff 😭🐱

User16: pussy lol

User17: Everyone needs emotional support due to this chaotic asf stream lmao💀

You stood back, cradling Garfield in your arms, letting Ellie have free rein, giving a few tips and advice that were swiftly dismissed by Ellie as she continued to do her own thing, including putting salt into the batter instead of sugar, even though you had literally put out all the ingredients for her beforehand which did not include salt.

"Taste test?" Ellie asks, turning around to face you, a wooden spoon in hand a scoop of beige mixture on top of it. "Absolutely not".

User18: DO ITTT

User19: do it! do it! do it!

'User30 donated $50: 'Do it Y/N, also congrats on 500k on YT Ellie <33'

"You hear the people. Taste." Ellie laughs thrusting the wooden spoon towards your mouth.

"It's confirmed, you all hate me and I will never forgive any of you for this" you scowl, opening your mouth hesitantly, allowing Ellie to place the spoonful into your mouths. The overwhelming taste saltiness hits your tongue immediately, making you gag at the unpleasantness.

You immediately rush over to the sink, spiting out the mixture, grabbing a glass of water and washing out your mouth, trying to rid it of the after taste that lingered behind. You hear Ellie's laugh from behind you, the only thing going through your mind was revenge.

Flour. Perfect. You reach into the half full paper bag pulling out a handful. Ellie was otherwise occupied, talking to her chat and answering donations, so when a handful of flour exploded in her face, it's an understatement to say it caught her of guard.

After recovering from a coughing fit triggered by the powder, she reached into an open jar, said jar having fresh strawberry jam inside of it. You saw this and of course, you began to run away, trying to get away from Ellie and the weapon that was her handful of red jelly. Eventually she caught up to you, her empty hand wrapped around your waist pulling you into her body as she smeared the sticky substance across your cheeks laughing at the ridiculous expression on your face.

Because your body was pushed against hers, the flour that coated her body transferred onto you.

"OH FUCK!" You yelled "my new sweater..."

"oh look, Y/N's discovered that her actions have consequences." She grinned cheekily, leaning down to kiss you, the jam from your face smudging onto hers.

----------

Taglist: @aunslie @lonelyfooryouonly @strawberrysmoochesxo @daryldixonh0e @kittynnie @lovelyyevelyn @randomhoex @moonlightdivine @haerinwho @mufflaa @mial1l @sarahsmileslikesarahd0esntcare @moonlighting87 @escaping-reality8 @hejdevkdbdjsd @dergy @half-of-a-gay @ellieismami @cyberlainn @gollumsmygel @sseorii @kyleeservopoulos @taloulalila @ellieluhme @kiiyoooo

NOT PROOFREAD

[girltigerclaw]

breaking into ur house rn

top ten characters and bottom ten. reasons are optional

I just finished this chart thing i think i actually stole from your blog a few months ago <3 Slightly edited to my own prefs.

If anyone wants the template check the reblogs, and feel free to add you own. I'd love to see. I'm just rambling under here:

Leafpool: She is more special and sacred than the virgin mary. She has everything. Daughter of the first protagonist, ex boyfriend for me to hate, TONS of wlw situationships<3, a lifetime of tragedy, and some of the most gorgeous canon art to exist.

Crookedstar: Crookedstar is a trans woman to me. Her life is genuinely just so tragic and fucked, I love it. The erins asked: “How much truama, death and misfortune can you fit into a single cat?” and then they wrote Crookedstar’s promise.

Tawnypelt: GIRLS WHO HATE THEIR FATHERS. The erins dont love her like I do.

Tallstar: I love old men… I fucking love seeing older characters and how much they’ve changed from their younger selves. Tallstar is considered one of, if not the most peaceful leader in the clans. But also when he was like 19 he went on a quest to fucking murder a guy :3

Cloudstar: I rlly do not care abt anyone in Skyclan(I like Leafstar but she's not a fav yknow?) Cloudstar... he was based as fuck. Why did Starclan get away with this shit for real??

Scourge: It’s fucking Scourge. He’s awesome

Briarlight: I’m disabled and I love her. She has such a consistent fun, sweet personality and she makes me happy!!<3

RavenBarley: It deserves all the attention and hype it gets. Though I wish mlm ships didn’t overshadow wlw ones in this fandom, RavenBarley is genuinely well written and makes me very emotional even if the publisher didnt allow it to be explicitly canon.

CrookedBlue: TRANS WOMEN CROOKEDSTAR YURI. Two leaders having a forbidden relationship and kits is way more interesting than Oakheart. The angst of Crooked and Blue sitting next to eachother every gathering while the entire forest has their eyes on them. Don’t look for too long, don’t let the mourning slip into your voice. You have to pretend your lover is a stranger. You… have become strangers. You can never be together again. You're enemies now. This is what we wanted, isn’t it? …We’ll never be happy again.

Mothwing: Her novella delving into her relationship with Hawkfrost was so good and heartbreaking.

Heathertail: Daughter of leader, sister of a major villian, and former love interest of a protagonist! Why did she fall off the second po3 ended. She’s shown to be very compassionate and willing to put her own feelings aside for the sake of others. Would’ve honestly prefered her as a mate to Lionblaze or get a pov herself over the nothing we got.

Blackstar: *Murders an elderly woman trying to stop me from kidnapping children. Supports a dictator openly abusing/neglecting children and the elderly. Murders a man for refusing to kill mixed raced children- then tells said man’s sister that she will never be safe.* Man…. i sure do feel bad for abusing and killing all of those people…. Good thing I will face no consequences and proceed to be made leader, where I will have even more power over the wellbeing of others.

I hate. This guy.

The New Prophecy: A classic. My first series was actually tnp! i feel more attached to first arc cats tho, if you couldn't already tell by my list lmao

Johanna Map- Best Tawnypelt content out there

BlueQuince: My personal handcrafted, homemade Yuri. Bluefur feels terrible about Tiny going missing and promises Quince she’ll help her find him. They never did, but they had a very… fleeting but intimate relationship. Quince is grieving and Bluefur feels so overwhelmed by the duties in her clan. They’ve always thought of eachother since but never met again.

Tigerclaw: My name sake<3 The angst of his earlier life is so, so facinating to me. Starclan being straight fucked up and decided killing him is their only option? He was a kid and they saw him as a lost cause from the start. They never tried any other methods, never tried to steer him in the right direction or… even just take it into their own hands and kill him themself, which they have SHOWN they’re capable of.

They watched all the the horrific crimes he commited, entirely aware they were going to happen. Thats. Fucking. Horrifying. Starclan is scary as shit… and his death? FANTASTIC. I only wish he’d gotten lives from cats he killed so that him coming back to life to suffer over and over was an actual curse from Starclan and not blessings. They knew how he would die and they gave him the lives to torture him for his sins…

Flywhisker: Adhd girlies. Painfully relate to that feeling of the constant scolding for never being “good enough” because I prefer to do things a certain way or struggle to focus. So, SO happy for her when she left the clans! You don’t have to prove yourself to anyone! Hope she’s happy and warm indoors with her brother💕

(P.S. I was very suprised to find she actually had an official art piece!)

Bluestar: Get behind me women with mental disorders. I will defend you. Beautifully complex and tragic character, my favorite written in the series. Literally can't think of a single other female character in handled as seriously and with the complexity of Bluestar. (Although her super edition was a bit of an L with how others treated her, it ultimately makes her breakdown even more painful.)

Exile from Shaodwclan: Nightstar my beloved! He's such a great guy. The rightful leader of Shadowclan, always and forever.

Ravenpaw's Farewell: HE DIED IN BARLEY'S ARMS, TELLING HIM HE WILL FIND HIM, NO MATTER WHERE HE IS. FUCK.

Crookedstar art: So beautiful. I genuinely think she's one of the prettiest cats in the series. This along with her official art by Wayne Mcloughlin.

Leopardstar: As a kid I hated her and loved Blackfoot, now I hate Blackfoot and love her. #feminism. But seriously I think she has way more going for her than he ever has. Her father is a medicine cat who hates violence, the DRASTIC change in Riverclan's view of outsiders upon Crookedstar's death and her leadership. Her already having a position of power before proving she's unworthy of it. (Unlike Blackstar who gets rewarded for his racism and violence by being made leader afterwards) and the fact she has to interact with her victims on a daily basis after what she did.

The writings attempts to redeem her are really lame and dismissive of the actually damage she did, but at the very least they TRIED to do something else with her. Personally, I would have loved to see her assassinated by Mistyfoot. Just like her mother Bluestar was almost killed all those moons ago by Tigerclaw... The parallels of violence for power and violence for peace. A victim repeating the actions of the very man who killed her brother to put an end to what he started in Riverclan.... A shadow in Riverclan, if you will. (<-Pretending erin hunter has hired me to rewrite their series)

Windclan: Tunneling as a concept and inviting outsiders into their clan so friendly and casual makes the clan seems so much more diverse than the others. It always stuck out to me!

Andddd there are my current warrior cat options as of 2023! If someone actually read this whole ramble ily<3

[relatableblorbopoll]

Round 1 of preliminaries, group 18

The first two places get a place on the bracket

Little reminder: there will be 2 more rounds of preliminaries, the losing blorbos of this poll still have 2 chances of getting in the official bracket

Propaganda under the cut

Tobias (Animorphs)

"his mom left him and hes at least a little transcoded and also hes a bird for the rest of his life"

Isaac O'Connor (Paranatural)

"he's like me but specifically when i was thirteen which should tell you all you need to know about both me and him. emotional wreck of a lad who feels excluded from his friend group no matter what. drew a gjinka of a fruit bowl in art class. canonically a fan of hatsune miku. will apparently be eaten by a cat in the future and survive."

Trisana Chandler / Tris (Emelan book series)

"Grumpy girl just wants to be left alone with her books but oops she actually has such a big heart with so much love in it. Always annoyed about having to put down her book to help her friends or save a bunch of innocents. Also she's got trauma out the wazoo, her family didn't want her and she was always bullied for her weight, and then at like age ten she has to kill a bunch of people and live with THAT trauma."

Sokka (Avatar: The Last Air Bender)

"I also like meat, sarcasm, and boomerangs. On a more serious note, he's the only one out of his group of friends for the longest time without special powers (relatable when you're friends with super talented people), he really likes organization and charts (same), and he completely fumbles his first attempt at public speaking (painful, but same). We're also both just a little bit goofy."

Haruhi Fujioka (Ouran Highschool Hostclub)

"She gets into a rich kid school and immediately goes into debt. Constantly annoyed by rich kid problems (including but not limited to: buying them instant coffee instead of expensive ground coffee). She’s supportive but doesn’t let them walk all over her. The whole show revolves around everyone thinking she’s actually a boy just because she has short hair and wears the boys uniform instead of the girls one— and that’s relatable because i wouldn’t want to wear the girls uniform either it’s not great"

Shinji Ikari (Evangelion)

"THE LAST 2 EPISODES OF THE SERIES??? holy shit I've never actually related to some fictional character so much. his self image, attitude, emotions, decisions, relationships, etc; he's just. me. that's not even funny. also thank god this thing is anonymous i would've delete my blog outa shame"

[meetinginsamarra]

mayprompts2024 #6,

Read part one (using the prompt “box”) here

Read part two (using the prompt “familiar”) here

Read part three (using the prompt “fall”) here

Read part four (using the prompt “awkward”) here

++++++

If you thought the last chapter/prompt was awkward (LOL) it's not getting better.

The testing intensifies...

++++++

The Perfect Place - Part Five

John needed a handkerchief to deal with his sweaty fore head and since he also needed to fetch the catalogue with the type-of-boxspring-in-relation-to-body-weight spreadsheet, he went to the counter.

Opening the drawer, he saw his gun lying on top of it. He took out both, cramming the catalogue under his arm and shoving the gun into the front pocket of his corduroy trousers. As ugly as the trousers were, they had the undeniable advantage of sporting a baggy cut with spacious front pockets so the gun could vanish easily in its depths.

(To be fair, normally John would not have touched this pair of trousers with a ten-foot pole. But he had assumed they would make him look like a trustworthy and respectable salesman and they let him hide the gun easily. Also, they had cost him nothing since he had inherited them from his sister Harry and practical as John was, he would not simply throw them away.) (Which would have been better, actually.)

Anyway, the familiar feeling of the gun’s cold metal against his body gave John some much-needed emotional support in further dealing with this intense (John meant arousing) customer. It distracted him from salivating (too) openly over the client. John could not risk that the man would get cold feet because of John being creepy and leaving the shop without buying the bed. Luckily, today John also wore a long cardigan, therefore the gun was practically invisible.

(The cardigan was another piece of exceptionally ugly clothing John had inherited via Harry. His sister on the other hand had also inherited the cardigan via their grandfather who had been gifted the hand-knitted atrocity by his wife. The grandmother had been an avid cat lover and had adorned the cardigan’s front with several hand-stitched cat faces.)

John returned to the customer and found him staring into space with a dazed expression and observed a weird smile forming on this beautiful face.

Meanwhile, Sherlock had been in a daze. He couldn’t believe his luck. John had actually picked his brain earlier to learn if he was gay and single, ergo John was interested in his person apart from selling the bed.

Sherlock had also noticed that the delightful rigidity he had attested while testing the mattress had been mirrored in John’s midsection. Even the baggy corduroy trousers had not been able to hide all of the rising bump. Sherlock deduced that John had been aroused and the only source could have been Sherlock himself and concluded further that his plan was working out fine.

Originally, the steps had been to get John to move into 221b as Sherlock’s flatmate and then seduce him into being his boyfriend. But apparently, it went the other way around and Sherlock had made John fall in love with him already, putting the flatmate-thing onto second position. This was perfectly okay, just a little bump in the way of totally winning John over.

Sherlock decided to step it up a notch with the testing. He wanted to see how far John would go and how far he could push him respectively. (Sherlock assumed that it would be important for their later relationship to know what he could get away with.) He needed to see how John would react in a precarious situation.

Sherlock watched John returning with the catalogue, fixed his eyes on him, smiled and offered his hand.

“Sorry, I forgot to introduce myself. Potential partners should know each other’s names. I’m Sherlock Holmes.” (Sherlock was so exited that he got a bit ahead himself.)

John stopped dead in his tracks. What? We’re partners? Since when? I didn’t notice… his brain fired frantic questions at him. Blood pounded in his ears.

Sherlock cleared his throat, realizing his blunder. “Business partners, that’s what I wanted to say. As in you sell the bed and I buy it. Therefore, we do business with each other, right?” That was close, he thought.

“Oh, sure, sure. John Watson, pleased to meet you. Again.” John released his breath. “Great. The deluxe bed suits you, then?”

“Yes, well, all seems very promising.” Sherlock looked at John from under his long eyelashes, deliberately changing his voice to a lower register because he knew exactly what effect this had on other men. (And women, but Sherlock din’t care about that.)

“Yet, I have to test the mattress for real. May I lie down, please?”

+++++

The Bed Shop Boys will continue to be idiots in love tomorrow!

tagging some people @calaisreno @totallysilvergirl @lisbeth-kk @peanitbear @raina-at

[ll-but-its-random]

Imagine if the Loric actually had a chimaera with each of them.

Oh... oh my god. Yes.

One:

Golden retriever called Caramel.

The kind of dog who would leap on you and you just instantly fall. That's how big.

Plays a little too much.

Hessu once told her to try looking after it on her own when she was like 5 or 6 and needless to say, the first time was the worst.

She became sort of a dog mom after that.

We don't talk about what happened to Caramel when the Mogs found them.

Two:

A ragdoll cat she calls Will.

Likes being a cat, but sometimes he just turns to something like a hamster to fall asleep unbothered.

First time it happened, Maggie thought he died and the crying woke him up.

Just sits down next to her on the couch or desk.

They usually end up dozing off in some weird position.

Three:

A wild dog he named Duma.

They experimented with multiple wild animals' forms before, they also don't talk about the time he shapeshifted into a hippo.

He is generally good at pretending to be a hunter dog, but then comes into the house through the window for a snack or something.

Everyone thinks Hannu has somehow tamed a wild dog and Hannu is there like:

As much as Duma likes being out in the open, he almost always shapeshifts into a bug and hides in Hannu's hair so he can go around with him.

Five:

He calls him Marlin, because he liked to be in a fish's form on the island (finding nemo reference).

He sometimes turns to a crab or bird to go on land but any time Five is at the beach, he takes the chance to go back into the water.

Emotional support hugs were more frequent after Rey died.

He sort of liked Emma at the start and Emma liked him because he was a cute little bird, what's not to love.

The Mogs didn't let Five keep him :(

Six:

Almost always a raven that she wanted Katarina to name for her- Fiachra.

Bird sort of human-like intelligence.

The many times she saved Six's ass, but she wouldn't phrase it like that.

When Six is mad and glares at someone, it pulls on the emotional tether, and Fia comes, perches on her shoulder and gives her own glare making them 10x more intimidating.

The were separated in her capture, but she found her again- don't ask me how, she did.

Seven:

A chimaera called Buttercup who is mostly taking the form of a rodent.

Like, imagine Marina walking around with a little hamster, squirrel or mouse in her front pocket. Absolutely adorable.

Some of the girls in the orphanage found Buttercup and it was hard to pry them off after that.

Adelina wanted her to release it into the wild, so after that argument, she pretended she did, but stopped carrying her around everywhere.

Buttercup once jumped on Eight's hair and matted it down while hugging him. Marina had a nosebleed.

Eight:

Adil never stays in the same form for two days in a row.

Eight sometimes got confused which animal he was until he jumps at him on first sight.

Eight tried to mimic what Adil does when he got his shapeshifting.

They almost always sleep cuddled together because what on earth would feel safer?

When he lost his chest, he was very anxious and worried at first and Adil was there on his back waiting a belly rub (he's so out of context).

Nine:

A hawk, or a Dalmatian, called Domino. Depends on how many mud prints Sandor doesn't want on the floor.

Literally just an animal version of the dude.

Maddy probably liked him more than she liked Nine.

He would stick his snout/beak around when Sandor is working then go feral when a spark from the welding thing catches him.

The garde can now tell when Nine is internalizing something because Domino's tail falls drastically.

Ten:

One of the baby Chimaera from the ship followed in the same direction as them when they landed and Crayton didn't have the heart to leave it alone.

Ella named her Coco because she liked to be a brown rabbit.

Crayton taught her almost everything about tending to chimaera by the time she was six, so she probably has more experience than all of the others combined.

Coco huddles up with her in bed and even in the blanket she was always in during FoF.

Snuck into her shirt when the Mogs kidnapped her, got on the Anubis undetected, tried to bite off Setrakus' fingers then felt bad because she hurt Ella instead.

[moonfurthetemmie]

Champion-Related Stuff. Mostly Fluff.

this is the last of what I have for now

Jasper has made homemade dog treats on at least once occasion and he immediately became Champ’s second-favorite

Obsidian is canonically a dog person, but I have a feeling Shale isn’t too keen on having a husky in the manor. Champ is pretty well-trained though, so Shale can get him to at least go away when he’s going aAWAWAAWAWAWA. Also Lucidity would probably run him through and fry him if he tried to hurt his dog, so there’s that. Other than that, tho, he does like Champ. Champ will lay down at his feet and chill with him sometimes. They’re vibing. Mostly. 

Jade loooooves Champ. Lucidity lets him and Dark keep an eye on the good boye when he has to leave, though he makes sure Jade actually knows how to take care of a dog first. While Dark isn’t super sure he likes Lucidity, he doesn’t mind watching Champion. Champ seems to be very happy and well-cared for, so Lucidity can’t be all that bad. Right?

Koroit builds up some crazy static if she’s not careful, and has to wear gloves just so she doesn’t burn her own hands from her magic, so I feel like she might not want to pet Champ. He desperately wants pats but she doesn’t want to accidentally zap him. Especially since she has no idea how much might kill him. Eventually she does figure out how to make sure she doesn’t hurt him giving him pats. Out of necessity. He keeps putting his head on her knee and giving her these big ol eyes when she’s sitting down.

I think Lucidity trained Champ not to get up on furniture, but Champ’s smart enough to realize that he can get away with it with some people. In particular Jade. Jade will let Champ up on the couch or his bed and let Champ squish him. Jade’s lucky Dark’s the only one who knows so far that he’s the main one responsible for this, because Shale’s not happy with all the husky fur on his goddam furniture.

Jet feels like a cat person, but I also feel like Nightshade would be the kind of guy who goes ‘we are NOT getting a dog’ and then becomes the dog’s best friend when they get one. Though let’s be real, Nightshade is also probably letting Champ up on the furniture once in a while. He only does it if he’s not wearing his nice clothes that he goes out in public with. He is NOT getting dog fur on his clothes!!!!!!!!!

Champ will sit with Paraiba and Silver and ‘join’ their conversation. He recognizes that Silver’s hand thing is a way of talking, because he can see that Paraiba will stop making noise when they start signing things, and start making noise when they’re done. They’re rather impressed. Once Champ starts ‘talking’ though it’s just him and Paraiba. 

“AwwaWAWAAWa”

“Oh? Really? Tell me more.”

“grrrOOO”

“I see, I see. Have you considered communism?”

“BARK awawa”

“Hm, yeah, good point.”

Just. that. For like ten minutes. Silver is having a hard time keeping a straight face

Zuli’s a little afraid of Champ at first, but since he’s a very well-trained good boy Champ knows to sit and be calm, especially when someone seems nervous. Champ happily accepts head pats. Champ will trot along beside Zuli when he comes upstairs. He tries to get Zuli to play with him but Zuli doesn’t usually have the energy to. Champ is sad. Zuli gives scritches though so he’s not too upset. 

Actually, I wonder if Champ gets a little vocal if Shale’s around and he notices Zuli’s getting really nervous. Especially when Shale gets close. Champ’s not being aggressive or even threatening, but he’s clearly not happy. Zuli is now Champ’s biggest fan in the manor, aside from Lucidity himself. Champ has become his emotional support dog and he’s almost looking forward to coming upstairs now. He gets mostly left alone by Shale, there’s a very sweet dog who wants to hang out with him, and the very sweet dog seems to keep telling Shale to fuck off. 

Lucidity doesn’t even know why or how Champ seems to know what’s going on, but he’s more than happy to let Zuli go around with Champ while he’s upstairs. Eventually Shale just leaves him alone entirely. Not worth it. This might mean Zuli can just stay upstairs, but I think Zuli would be too afraid that Shale would want to mess with him again if he does. Because there’s no way Champ’s going to stay with him 24/7; Champ has all these other people, including his actual owner, to hang out with and play with and mooch treats off of. He doesn’t begrudge Champ time with the other humans who adore him, he just would like to continue having Shale leave him the hell alone.

Lucidity gets Champ a few dog beds. They’re around the manor. One’s in his room, there’s one in a couple of the shared spaces like the living room and stuff. In about a week there’s 3x more dog beds than Lucidity got and no one will admit to getting any. There’s also a bunch of dog toys, like, everywhere. Champ is having a GREAT time. Lucidity caught Nightshade bringing Champ a squeaky toy. Champ loves this squeaky toy. Shale does not like the squeaky toy. Champ can’t have the squeaky toy when Shale’s around :(( 

Champ’s presence is actually boosting the mood of pretty much everyone in the manor. This means better performance from the team, but shale doesn’t like that everyone’s so happy. Lucidity keeps making comments about him being a cartoon villain whenever Shale says anything about it, even indirectly, and it’s just making Shale more mad. Nightshade is having so much fun watching this. 

Champ probably follows Jasper around some nights. Human up??? What human doing??? What going on :0 

As much as Lucidity would like to take Champ for a trip outside of the manor’s universe, he knows that the manor is safe. The only people who know where it is are the people who live there. And he’s terrified that someone would see them and try to take Champ from him, one way or another. Fortunately, Champ’s very happy to have this ginormous house and yard to run around in, so Lucidity doesn’t feel too bad. 

Lucidity is very protective of Champ now. He’s all he has left. He’ll lose Champion one day, yes; but peacefully passing from old age is something Lucidity can handle. It happens. It’s happened so many times. It’ll break his heart, but at least he’ll know Champion lived a full, happy life. 

[boomboxboi]

Narancia Ghirga

An in-depth look at the character.

————————————————————————

Buckle up, folks. This post is going to be a disgustingly long one.

I’ll break it down into 5 categories;

Past

Personality

Relationships

Stand

Conclusion

This post is going to have a lot of theories presented based on facts we are given about the character. You are welcome to disagree with these theories.

That being said- there will be heavy topics addressed ahead so read with caution.

————————————————————————

Past

Narancia’s past was summed up in a total of 9 pages in the manga (yes, I counted).

I’ll give a VERY brief summary of his past here.

Narancia’s mother died from an eye disease when he was ten years old.

His father (unnamed) never showed affection to Narancia. Especially after his mother passed away.

Narancia stopped attending school and spent time with his friends, instead.

Narancia was framed and sent to juvie.

The cops beat Narancia.

Narancia left juvie with an infected eye.

Narancia’s friends avoided him.

He learned he was betrayed by his friend.

Narancia stays in the streets and gives up on life.

Fugo crosses paths with Narancia and takes him to eat spaghetti.

Bucciaratti brings him to a hospital for treatment.

Narancia asks to join the mafia and Bruno yells at him.

Narancia returns home and never trusts his father again.

6 months later, Narancia joins Passione.

All of this is a very glossed over summarization of what we learn about Narancia in 9 pages. And those nine pages are extremely telling.

Let’s take a more in-depth look at all of this information.

First, let’s start with the fact that Narancia, at age 10, effectively lost both of his parents. Between his mother suddenly dying from an unnamed eye disease (which I speculate to be orbital cellulitis) and his father (word for word in the manga) “never showed much affection for his son, and after the mothers death, he only became more and more distant”.

Narancia, without outright stating it, was neglected by his father.

The following are what is considered neglect from the written work “Child Neglect: A Guide for Prevention, Assessment, and Intervention” and examples that Narancia directly experienced in those short 9 pages;

Physical Neglect

Abandonment - the desertion of a child without arranging for his reasonable care or supervision.

{source 1}

Example:

Narancia was roaming the streets and sleeping at friends houses.

Nutritional Neglect - when a child is undernourished or is repeatedly hungry for long periods of time, which can sometimes be evidenced by poor growth.

{source 1}

Examples:

Narancia was stealing his dinners (pre-juvie).

Narancia was “scrounging for food like a cat through the trash cans behind a restaurant” (post-juvie).

“Narancia was hospitalized. With a real bed and proper nutrition—-“ (direct from the manga).

Medical Neglect

Delay in Health Care - the failure to seek timely and appropriate medical care for a serious health problem that any reasonable person would have recognized as needing professional medical attention.

{source 1}

Example:

Narancia’s eye infection- which was a result of the beatings he received from the cops while in juvie.

Inadequate Supervision

Permitting or not keeping the child from engaging in risky, illegal, or harmful behaviors.

{source 1}

Examples:

Narancia stealing food.

Narancia roaming the streets unsupervised or with other children.

Narancia dropping out of school.

Emotional Neglect

Inadequate Nurturing or Affection- the persistent, marked inattention to the child’s needs for affection, emotional support, or attention.

{source 1}

Example:

Narancia’s father was noted as being distant (and extremely so after his mother passed).

Narancia’s father (in the anime) did not reassure him of the eye disease that killed his mother and left him alone at her grave.

Other permitted maladaptive behavior - the encouragement or permission of other maladaptive behavior under circumstances where the parent or caregiver has reason to be aware of the existence and the seriousness of the problem, but does not intervene.

{source 1}

Examples:

Narancia goes to juvie.

Narancia drops out of school.

Narancia joins the mafia.

Educational Neglect

Permitted Chronic Truancy - permitting habitual absenteeism from school averaging at least 5 days a month if the parent or guardian is informed of the problem and does not attempt to intervene.

{source 1}

Example:

Narancia stops attending school.

Narancia only resumes school attendance (for a time) under Bruno’s directive.

Narancia drops out of school again and joins the mafia.

Failure to enroll or other truancy- failing to homeschool, to register, or to enroll a child of mandatory school age, causing the child to miss at least 1 month of school without valid reasons.

{source 1}

Example:

Narancia not attending school and only having a basic education due to dropping out of primary school and not attending up to age 17.

His father shows multiple signs of neglect in just 9 pages by being relatively absent in Narancia’s life. So much so that Narancia actively looks up to and admires a member of the mafia.

Studies also show that losing a parent at a young age through death typically has a negative impact on the child’s life.

Most notably being that kids who have lost a parent are more than twice as likely to show impairments in functioning at school and at home, even 7 years later.

{source 2}

Narancia is shown to struggle immensely with school and education as a whole. It’s likely that Narancia’s mother’s passing heavily influenced his behavior to drop out of school- coupled with the lack of parenting and guidance he received from his father.

All in all, it’s pretty clear that Narancia had a turbulent upbringing that led to him joining Passione.

————————————————————————

Personality

Narancia is often described as being childish, quick-tempered, and loyal towards his friends.

A lot of this is displayed throughout the manga. And a lot of this is easily explained away by his upbringing.

Let’s touch on Narancia’s behavior which clearly stems back from his childhood neglect. For this, I will focus on how neglect effects childhood development.

Children who experience neglect in their childhood often display the following symptoms;

depression

anxiety

apathy

failure to thrive

hyperactivity

aggression

developmental delays

low self-esteem

Substance misuse

withdrawing from friends and activities

appearing uncaring or indifferent

shunning emotional closeness or intimacy

{source 3}

Narancia does show signs of anxiety when he’s forced to choose in betraying Passione (granted, many would experience that. However, his response was heavily focused on at the time and he had a visceral reaction to having to make a choice for himself).

Failure to thrive is indicated heavily with his poor education. As well as developmental delays.

Narancia also appears to be aggressive. This showing in how he reacts to those he deems a threat to him or giving him any negative response.

Take for example the first time we meet Narancia as he’s studying with Fugo. The two break into a fight and Narancia is ready to stab/attack Fugo. This shows up again when he violently attacks Formaggio with his stand while also kicking the car Formaggio is in. There are other instances as well, where he kicks Zucchero’s head, attacks the man with the white suit, and other various instances where he reacts with extreme violence.

I would also argue that Narancia’s experience in betrayal from both his father and those he deemed his friends affect his personality as well.

Betrayal Trauma occurs most commonly from:

Child abuse- including physical, sexual abuse, and emotional abuse (e.g., manipulation, gaslighting, verbal abuse, etc.)

{source 4}

As discussed prior, Narancia had experienced abuse in his childhood via neglect from his father. However, betrayal trauma can occur from other instances of trauma in one’s life as well.

Betrayal trauma differs vastly from other types of trauma because it involves not just the experience of abuse but also the experience of being betrayed by a key relationship such as; a parent, caregiver, guardian, significant other, or other individual who is relied upon for support and safety.

{source 4}

It’s made relatively clear that Narancia relies on his friends for support and safety when his father does not provide it. He stays in their homes, steals food with them, and blatantly states that friendship is what he deems as most important.

A few signs of betrayal trauma are:

Intrusive thoughts and images

Nightmares or flashbacks

Avoidance behaviors

Hypervigilance (constantly scanning your environment for potential threats)

Irritability or angry outbursts

Insomnia

Fearfulness

Social withdrawal

Feeling emotionally numb

Physical symptoms of tension headaches, migraines, and fatigue

{source 4}

Narancia could be stated to be rather hyper vigilant when you realize his stand has a radar to detect carbon emissions. He also has angry outbursts (as discussed prior), irritability, and even a tinge of fearfulness (when left to make his own choices).

Those who suffer from betrayal trauma may also have issues with regulating their emotions. This is something we see in Narancia time and time again. Where as other members of the Bucci Gang are able to compose their emotions (especially when it comes to their tasks at hand), Narancia struggles with this. He’s the only one who has an outburst over Abbacchio’s death, he constantly lashes out when harmed, and overall seems to struggle with handling his emotions.

The betrayal and neglect that Narancia suffered at a young age does seem to contribute heavily to his childish personality despite not being the youngest member of the team (Narancia 17. Giorno 15. Fugo 16).

I would also say that Narancia seems to have unwavering loyalty for those that he trusts. Those he does not trust immediately receive volatile reactions from him. We see this when Formaggio is in the car (constantly referring to him as a stalker), attacking Trish when they first encounter one another, immediately claiming a civilian is an enemy and attacking them, and so on. I strongly believe that this also stems from the betrayal that Narancia faced at a young age (coupled with his role in the mafia).

————————————————————————

Relationships

Onto my favorite part about this post. Relationships. I’m going to delve into the relationships that are presented in the manga and give my thoughts on three categories;

How the relationship is outwardly presented

How it effects Narancia

Overall thoughts of the relationship

Theories (for fun)

The characters we will delve into on this section are as follows;

Narancia’s Mother

Narancia’s Father

Unnamed Blond Friend

Bruno Bucciarati

Panacotta Fugo

Guido Mista

Leone Abbacchio

Giorno Giovanna

Trish Una

Narancia’s Mother

Outwardly Presented: He does not seem to have any ill-will towards his mother. In the anime, Narancia seems to be genuinely concerned of his mother’s well-being while she’s in the hospital. And once she passes away, he even visits her grave.

Relationship Effects: While Narancia only had his mother in his life for 10 years, the impact it left on him is a core feature of his character. He constantly dwells on his mother’s death and the eye disease that killed her. He even tells his unnamed blond friend over this and then has it used against him.

Overall: I believe Narancia was close to his mother in the way any young child would be. He does seem to be worried about his mother when in the hospital and is even seen visiting her grave when older. I can’t speculate on what relationship his mother and father had together, however I feel I can say that once his mother passed, the neglect he experienced only seemed to grow.

Theories: Because Narancia’s mother had passed from an eye disease (read my thoughts on that here: https://m.facebook.com/groups/5738337702888821/permalink/6284327651623154/?mibextid=qC1gEa) that manifests due to trauma to the eye, I would say that her relationship with her husband may have involved physical altercations. I think this compounded the trauma that Narancia faced once his mother had passed and I would even say that his mother may have originally been pressured to not have Narancia but opted to do so which put a strain on the relationship.

Narancia’s Father

Outwardly Presented: It is clearly stated that Narancia does not think highly of his father. He refers to him as a piece of shit, was neglected by him, and does not trust him.

Relationship Effects: Due to the neglect that Narancia faced under his fathers care (which was gone over in above sections), I think it’s safe to say his father was a large contributing factor as to why Narancia had become a part of the mafia. Without proper guidance or parental care in his earlier years, Narancia was bound to slip into a life of crime. Especially after the people who essentially saved his life were members of a crime syndicate. Had his father been present in his life, there likely would have been a different outcome.

Overall: The manga makes a clear point that Narancia’s father was not involved in his son’s life. So much so that when Narancia was living on the streets and dealing with an eye infection that clearly was taking it’s toll on him, he did not go home or if he did, his father did not handle the situation accordingly. This lack of care is what sent Narancia on the path he wound up on.

Theories: Buckle up because I have a few theories on Narancia’s father. I’ll touch on 3 big ones that I feel are highly possible (but do not have concrete facts to back these up).

Narancia is not the unnamed man’s biological child. How his mother wound up pregnant with Narancia is irrelevant. Where the issue stems from is that the man he perceives as his father does not have the interest of the child in mind.

Narancia’s father was abusive towards his mother and it’s how she wound up with the eye infection (and why Narancia getting beat by cops resulted in the same eye infection).

Narancia’s always been a problem child and his father was not equipped to handle this and he grew distant from his child. Especially after the mother’s death.

Unnamed Blond Friend

Outwardly Presented: We only see two brief interactions with Narancia and his unnamed blond friend. The first is when he convinces Narancia to dye his hair blond. The second is when he sees him again after he’s let out of juvie. Both interactions had forms of manipulation in them to benefit the blond male.

Relationship Effects: The effects of this relationship are, essentially, what sent Narancia into the lowest point of his life. Before, Narancia had his friends to trust and rely in. He even mentally beat himself up when he suspected his friend set him up and only accepted this as a fact once he saw his friend again after juvie and learned he was spreading rumors about the eye disease that killed his mother.

Overall: Overall, this relationship is what I think solidified Narancia’s path in life. While his father set him on that path, this betrayal from a close friend is what led to him giving up on life. After all, he had valued his friendships above all and now that was torn from him.

Theories: My only theory in regards to this man is that I think he was addicted to drugs that Passione were distributing. Hence why he beat the old woman for her money and then framed Narancia. Not to mention, in both the manga & anime, he seems a bit disheveled.

Bruno Bucciarati

Outwardly Presented: Bruno is Narancia’s hero. It states as much in the manga. Bucciarati is, after all, the one who gave his food up for Narancia to eat and then took him to a hospital. Even his harsh words about Narancia not joining the mafia made Narancia realize there are people who care for your well-being. He even wants Bruno to call the shots for him when he has to make a life-altering choice.

Relationship Effects: Where as the first people mentioned are people who set Narancia down the path of becoming a mafioso, Bruno was there to try and deter him. Of course, this did not work but only because Narancia found he had far more admiration for Bucciarati than he ever had for his father. After all, Bruno showed him he cared through actions and words. He did this by getting Narancia the medical attention he desperately needed, offered him a place to stay (though immediately told him to go back home and to school), and then told him that the mafia life was not worth joining and that he would be better off having a normal life as a civilian. He also had Narancia choose his own life path and refused to order him onto the boat to betray the boss. Which, ultimately, sparked the conviction Narancia was lacking in his life.

Overall: Bucciarati had the biggest (positive) impact on Narancia out of everyone in his life. He truly wanted what was best for Narancia and not with any implications behind it. This was something that Narancia had not experienced before in his life. His father abandoned him. His friends used and betrayed him. Bruno was there for him at his lowest and remained there for him without expecting anything in return.

Theories: While Narancia did return home after his stay at the hospital, he clearly thought a lot about what Bucciarati said and did for him. It was stated that, after he returned home, he never trusted his father again. I truly believe that this was because this is the first time Narancia saw and experienced what it was like to have someone care for you with no conditions attached. I always found it curious that it was stated so clearly that Narancia NO LONGER trusted his father. Especially up to that point in his life. And after thinking on it, I believe Bruno is what made Narancia learn he deserved so much more than he was getting.

Panacotta Fugo

Outwardly Presented: This relationship has always vexed me. Clearly, the two are very close. Both have extreme tempers and easily explode on one another. But there’s also the level of care and concern they both have for one another as well. Fugo takes on a pretty large role in Narancia’s life. After all, he is the one to bring him to Bruno. He’s also the one that helps him study. And if you count PHF as canon, he’s also the one to help Narancia join Passione behind Bruno’s back.

Relationship Effects: While I could say Narancia was impacted by Fugo, I think it was the other way around. Fugo was Impacted by Narancia. Especially if we take PHF into consideration as canon. Throughout, Fugo constantly reflects on his time with Narancia. Sure, Fugo helped Narancia with getting off the streets and helped Narancia with his education, but he also helped Narancia join Passione behind Bruno’s back and against Bruno’s wishes. I certainly think he cares deeply for Narancia but I do feel there is also a level of selfishness in his care, as well.

Overall: Narancia and Fugo both have large impacts on one another. Where Fugo helps with giving Narancia a new chance at life through bringing him to the mafia and helping his education, I believe Narancia helps Fugo by showing him that there’s always room for growth and that you can better your circumstances in life even when it feels impossible to do so- solely by having the right people around you.

Theories: Here is where the fun theories begin. Aka the ship battles. So feel free to agree or disagree because it’s gonna be a hot take (maybe). I actually do not think these two would ever work out romantically. Aside from how volatile they can react to one another from time to time, there’s also a power imbalance between the two. I do feel that there may have also been some misunderstandings between the both of them in regards to having a romantic relationship but I do not ever see it truly working out between the two. Esepcially due to the fact that Narancia, in the end, decided to follow change, while Fugo remained the same (which is an allegory I would love to touch on one day).

Guido Mista

Outwardly Presented: The two come across as friendly and very close with one another. Friendly enough that 1) they know a whole choreographed dance, 2) they constantly bicker and tease each other over little things (ie.pouring soda on the speaker, the chocolate bickering, etc). and 3) the way they hang off of each other and outwardly show concern for one another.

Relationship Effects: While we don’t see a lot of interaction focused heavily on these two, there are a lot of background interactions we see that show these two are close with one another. It’s hard to really say what effect the two have on one another aside from when Narancia passed, Guido was clearly very distraught. More so than he was with Abbacchio in the sense that he did not hide his emotions through his death. And that, to me, speaks volumes.

Overall: Everyone sleeps on these two. It’s clear that they are close to one another despite the focus of their interactions not being front and center. They have a deep connection, as they’re able to have a coordinated dance routine, and Narancia’s death leaving a large impact on Mista.

Theories: They’re fuckin’. Okay no- but if it’s not clear, y’all sleepin’ on them as a couple. One day, I’m gonna write a whole essay on these two as a pairing and you’ll be subjected to my disgusting opinions. But aside from that, I just want to say that they do come across as extremely close to one another despite screen time between them never being the main focus and I wish there would have been more interactions that focused on just these two, as a whole.

Leone Abbacchio

Outwardly Presented: These two are another that don’t have a lot of direct interactions with one another. However, it does seem that Narancia holds Abbacchio in high regards, going as far as to ask him to have Fugo stop jamming him with the keys and then being distraught at Abbacchio’s passing.

Relationship Effects: I really wish we would have seen more interaction between these two. However, I still believe they’re close enough to warrant the reaction Narancia had upon his death.

Overall: Narancia seems to have respect for Abbacchio and seemed to be touched by his death. I really wish we could have gotten more interactions between the two of them but also it makes sense that we didn’t, as Abbacchio seems more the type to keep to himself.

Theories: Less of a theory and more of just a part I wish would have been explored more. I really wish that the topic of Abbacchio being a former officer and Narancia experiencing brutality from the police at juvie would have been touched up on. I’d love to have seen how Abbacchio would react to that and how Narancia would have felt upon learning about Abbacchio’s former job. (Maybe a fic idea for the future).

Giorno Giovanna

Outwardly Presented: Another person that could have had more interaction. However, it’s clear that Narancia has no qualms with Giorno. He even views him as smart and reliable. Though, Narancia seems to tease him about the age difference between them and bragging about being older.

Relationship Effects: Narancia seems to have respect for Giorno. Whether this is because his allies (especially Bruno) trust him or because Giorno earned his respect, is up for debate. However, he clearly thinks Giorno is smart- trying to relay the message of an enemy attack with his fight against Tizzano and Squalo. Additionally, he does try to save Giorno, as well. There’s also the point where they swap bodies and both seem relatively comfortable in each others skin. I do think they have very similar upbringings and would have loved for them to have a conversation about this on screen. There was a lot for them to relate to.

Overall: Narancia has respect for Giorno and has a similar upbringing as him. I would even dare to say that because of the similarities, they would have been extremely close friends had Narancia survived. I also want to point out that Giorno had seen something in Narancia enough to 1) become visibly upset over his death and 2) promise to take his body home at the end. Both of these were things he did not promise to Abbacchio nor Bruno. Though, it’s clear they all had an impact on Giorno.

Theories: Because of how similar I feel their upbringings are, I strongly believe that Narancia was meant to be a foil to Giorno. Not only do we see them have emotionally unavailable parents and neglect, but both find their savior through the mafia. However, Giorno has a clear dream and goal and a driving force to push him through where as Narancia does not have this until he’s forced to make a choice between staying behind or betraying the boss. Only then does he have a goal and direction and meaning given to his life.

Trish Una

Outwardly Presented: Narancia does not seem to have much of a connection to Trish until he sees her wrist and fully understands how she’s alone, like him. Once that happens, Narancia states he wants to protect Trish with his life and that she’s “just like him”. From there, the two seem to become rather close. Just under Trish trusting Bruno, I would say she trusts Narancia the most, after that.

Relationship Effects: Trish is Narancia’s biggest driving force to change his life. Without her, his life would have remained the same. There would have been no drive to become better and do better by himself or others. With Trish, Narancia has a reason to do better. He has a goal to protect her and, by default, now must put effort into his own life.

Overall: As elaborated, Trish is Narancia’s reason. His “why” for the actions that follow the remainder of the series. I also think that it was good for Trish to have another person aside from Bruno to put her full trust and faith in. Additionally, Narancia was able to learn from Trish that it’s possible to move past trauma and push forward to a better life.

Theories: I truly believe that Narancia and Trish would have started a new life outside of the mafia together (romantically or platonically) had Narancia survived. They both seemed to have formed a deep bond with one another after Narancia opted to protect Trish. Narancia often trying to give her some form of comfort (and Trish even seeking for comfort when their bodies swapped and she hugged Narancia’s body while forgetting that Giorno was in said body).

To wrap up this section, Narancia had his life impacted by multiple people. Some in a positive way and others in a negative way. The way each interaction helped to shape how Narancia, as a person, was shows how intricate the character. No matter if the interaction was shown direct on screen or implied off screen, he has a deep ness to his character that is shown through the interactions he holds with others and the lasting impact he left behind.

————————————————————————

Stand

In this section, I wanted to go over Aerosmith, as stands are stated to be a physical representation of the user’s soul. This means that Aerosmith, with all design choices in place, is a direct representation of Narancia as a whole. While most of this section is purely speculation (due to the lack of facts we are given), I want people to really consider all aspects of the stand design.

These are what I will focus on for this section:

Appearance

Abilities

Attitude

Appearance

Taking on the shape of a toy fighter jet, Aerosmith is small but deadly. A tiny pilot is inside (Mr. Smith), which seemingly controls the jet. Additionally, there are features of eyes and a mouth on the front of the plane and the primary color pallet used is red and yellow (though other color pallets are used from time to time).

A deeper dive on what these appearances convey are interesting to ponder.

The first thing to note is that it takes on a fighter jet. To me, this shows that Narancia could come across as having both a fight or flight mode, though he often chooses fight. It could be interrupted that, while he fights for smaller ordeals in his life, he tends to avoid or “fly away” from the bigger issues. To elaborate on this, Narancia easily fights off enemies and direct threats. However, he is avoiding the issue of a deeper purpose (until deciding his purpose is to protect Trish).

Next, the plane is toy-sized. This fits in with the fact that Narancia, as a character, is still very child-like. A contributing factor to this was the neglect he faced at early stages in his life. Both malnutrition, educational neglect, and lack of guidance gives him the air of being much younger than he is and room to grow, as an individual.

Mr. Smith, the pilot, is also what controls/guides Aerosmith. To me, this indicates a need for guidance. Someone else is piloting his life until he seemingly takes control. Or, it could be seen that he is attempting to escape living life on auto-pilot.

The eyes and mouth feature also is fascinating. It gives the plane a more threatening aura. Be this an outside mask to come across as more aggressive to ward off those who may try to harm Narancia.

Finally, the main color scheme being red and yellow. Red is often the color of passion. Passionate feelings arise in not just romance but in intensity of any emotion. And Narancia displays his emotions very intensely. The yellow color often is attributed to hope, youth, and joy. This, to me, shows he is striving to have a life of joy.

Abilities

Aerosmith, as a stand, has a wide range of abilities and uses. Between being a long-ranged stand that can shoot endless bullets from its machine guns, drop a bomb, and detect carbon dioxide on a small radar, it’s astounding how much this tiny stand can truly contribute to the team.

When really dissecting what each ability could relay about Narancia’s soul, you may find some interesting attributes to think through.

The difference between long range and close range stands always has me perplexed. What decides on who gets long range versus close range? I believe it’s a wide array of factors that decide this. In Narancia’s case, I believe it stems from his needs to wanting to be close to others but the struggles to truly allow himself that closeness unless earned. He, like his stand, prefers to keep a distance unless he trusts them enough to “land”.

Endless bullets, for me, shows Narancia’s boundless energy and constant rebuttals to life. He’s had to constantly keep his guard up so the fact that his ammunition never seems to run out is awfully convenient for a stand to have. On the flip side, it also shows that Narancia has had to constantly fight to keep afloat.

The singular bomb shows Narancia’s explosive attitude when angered. Small things can set him off and when he’s set off, his outburst can lead to irreversible damage. Much like a bomb going off, Narancia cannot undo the damage that is done when he lets his emotions get the better of him.

The radar, for me, really shows Narancia’s profound need to find those he can rely on and trust. It also shows how he has his guard up at all times, as well. A radar is used to search and locate. So what is it Narancia is so keen on finding that his stand- the literal representation of his soul- manifests a radar? For me, it’s finding who he can trust and keeping an eye out for danger. Carbon dioxide comes from living beings but it also comes from fire. Both can provide comfort but also hurt you. So the radar, for me, represents the duality of humans.

Attitude

This may be the hardest to dissect, as Aerosmith is not exactly a humanoid stand (though Mr. Smith is presumably a humanoid pilot). However, Aerosmith does have a few distinct actions that gives it “attitude”. Father way in which the stand moves, is what I am referring to. Specifically how it behaves when flying and landing. It can either fly erratic when attacking, slow and steady while hunting, or, when it lands, on Narancia’s arms like an airstrip.

Studying how the stand moves is an important key factor in understanding Narancia, as a character.

Erratic movements while fighting displays the same erratic behavior Narancia shows when he is upset. There is no regulation in his stand’s movements just as there are no regulations with his emotions.

Contrastly, when Aerosmith is searching for a target, it flies steady and with determination. This showcases Narancia’s capabilities of focusing when he puts his mind to something.

Finally, the fact that his stand lands on his arms like an airstrip is such a unique and compelling attribute. The fact that his stand uses Narancia to “land” really shows that Narancia, and only Narancia, has the ability to guide himself. Whether he thinks that or not is not the point. The fact that his soul manifestation uses him as a guide for landing shows that Narancia was the only one, in the end, who could make life choices for himself.

————————————————————————

Conclusion

Narancia is so much more than what people give him credit for. Sure, I may have speculated a lot, but this is just a character deep-dive of what I feel was shown through all aspects of his character.

You may have a different opinion, and that is okay.

But at the end of the day, Narancia is a great character with so many complexities that come across as so deeply human and he deserves more appreciation.

————————————————————————

Sources

{source 1 - https://www.childwelfare.gov/pubPDFs/neglect_ch2.pdf}

{source 2 - https://www.psychiatry.pitt.edu/news/longest-and-most-detailed-study-pediatric-grief-following-parental-loss-date-department}

{source 3 - https://www.healthline.com/health/mental-health/childhood-emotional-neglect#symptoms-in-children}

{source 4 - https://mindwellnyc.com/top-betrayal-trauma-signs-triggers-strategies-to-recovery-2022/}

Note: I wrote this and posted it on a few other sites. Also this is just me being speculative and very bored at work one day. Feel free to disagree but please don’t be rude. I just don’t have the energy for it.

[zerillia]

𝘚𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘺𝘬𝘪𝘥𝘴 𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘩 𝘮𝘦𝘮𝘣𝘦𝘳- Part 1

TITLE: Meeting the members

PAIRING: Straykids x y/n

SUMMARY: Meeting your new members, but they don't really know how to feel about you.

WORD COUNT: 2,382

It was finally the day, as you made your way inside the Jype building

with bangchan, you couldn't help but feel nervous about meeting all the rest of the members. Chan led you in to the practice room where the members of Skz were told to gather and wait. They all sat waiting having no idea the reasoning for their gathering, or where Chan could possibly be. It was a Sunday, they had somehow conviced Chan to ask the manager for one off day, So they could go to the summer fair. They sat all in a row on the black leather bench, Waiting, chatting with a strong determination to guess what Chan was gonna say when he arived. I.N : "Where is hyung?" Felix: "I don't know.."

Hyunjin: "He did text the gc we'd meet here, right?"

Felix: "Yeah, he did, everyone is here besides Cha-"

Then a familiar door creaks from the side door interupting their talk and Chan walks in pulling along a girl by the hand.

Chan: "And we're here!" The girl tried to hide behind him but he chuckled and pulled har to stand infront of him in the middle of the room. Chan: "Everyone!..this is Y/n our new ninth member" They all froze. Looking at you with widened eyes, some jaws dropping as they process what he just said. They hadn't been expecting this.

Chan: "Dont worry, She's really talented and hardworking" Bangchan spoke up trying to keep the meeting cheerful. Their eyes glued onto you as if they hadn't blinked for ten minutes. The silence was loud, not one person had moved a muscle.

Han: "Y-you're joking.."Chan looked over at Han with a serious expression. His eyes narrowed as he met Han's angry gaze. He knew this reaction wasn't entirely unexpected, but he still hoped for a more welcoming attitude.

Chan: "No, I'm not joking."He replied firmly, his voice laced with a hint of warning, reminding Han not to overreact, you took a step back once again standing behind Bangchan.

Hyunjin: "So there's a girl in our group now?!"

Hyunjin exclaimed, astonishment and disbelief evident on his face. Everyone else shared the same emotions, their gazes fixed intently on her. Han: "Was the company smoking when they decided this?'He said with a sharp glare, clearly disapproving of the situation. Bangchan's jaw clenched, irritated by Hans words, and saying it infront of Rei was even worse.

Felix: "well...i like her if chan does..." He interjected, cutting through the room. He gets up, standing by you and Chan, a pat on your shoulder to let you know you had his support. Felix's reaction seems to have shifted the tension in the air. As he stood by your side, the other members' expressions softened slightly.

Seungmin: "This is weird..but..im in too"

I.n: "me too"

He muttered, his eyes looking every except to hers. Seungmin's response was surprisingly supportive, a hint of relief filled Chan's expression. Han: "No!..i refuse to group up with a..girl" Han immediately refused, his anger still evident. Chan sighed heavily, his patience starting to wear thin. 

Chan "Just be nice, talk to her you might have the same intrests, She'll be with us all day today at the fair" he retorted, his voice firm.

Hyunjin: "Chan's got a point.." Hyunjin chimed in, attempting to ease the situation. "She's cute anyways" Hyunjin's compliment seemed to lighten the mood a bit, Changbin had given up at the point and Minho had already practicly been won over after seeing your cat key chain on your bag, asking where you'd got it, the annoyance already dissipating aside from Han. Han's expressions turned even more sour, his irritation towards the situation growing. He crossed his arms and turned his head away, clearly not pleased with how things were unfolding.

Chan: "Han."

Chan spoke firmly, He knew Han well enough to know that he needed to be handled with care in situations like these. Han refused to meet Chan's gaze, still sulking in the corner. He muttered under his breath "fine."

Chan let out a sigh, knowing that 'fine' from Han didn't guarantee anything. He turned his attention back to you, hoping the rest of the members would warm up to you quickly. Changbin: "We're still going to the fair, right?" Changbin broke the tense silence, trying to shift the focus towards the planned outing.

Y/n: ".....i hope so" Chan looked over at you, giving you a reassuring smile. He was hoping today would be an opportunity for the members to bond with you and see that you were an addition to their group, not a threat.

Felix: "Of course we are!"

Felix's bright enthusiasm filled the room, His positive energy so bright that could start to melt the icy tension, Chan couldn't help but smile at Felix's positivity. It was like a breath of fresh air in this tense situation.

Hyunjin: "Let's start our day, shall we?"

Hyunjin chimed it, taking you hand, attempting to steal you from the members as he pulled you out the practice room to start their outing. The other members watched as Hyunjin dragged you away, a mix of emotions on their faces. Chan gave a gentle nudge to Han, silently urging him to behave and give you a chance. Han glare to Hyunjin's back, watching as he whisked you away. His scowl deepened, a mixture of jealousy and grudging acceptance on his face. Meanwhile, Seungmin and Changbin approached Chan, their expressions a mix of curiosity and excitement. "This is gonna be interesting." Seungmin muttered with a grin.

Chan let out a small chuckle, running a hand through his hair. "Interesting is an understatement." he replied, knowing today could either bring the group closer together or create even more tension. Felix couldn't contain his energy any longer. He was jumping all at Chan, a mischievous glint in his eyes. "I like her already!"

Chan chuckled at Felix's enthusiasm, ruffling his friend's hair. "I knew you would, our little sunshine"

[everyonewoo03]

Virtual reality AU

_Player 107 Wonwoo

_Oneshot (Part 1)

Genre: Action/Science Fic

Warning: Shooting will be mentioned.

Enjoy :)

————————————————————————————————————————

“You gotta be kidding me.” He laughs.

“It’s true Woo, you gotta believe me!”

“That sounds ridiculous, you know that right?” He side eyed me.

Oh come on.

“Me? Dying?” He coughs.

“It looked so real…” I pouted.

“I’m not going anywhere cupcake.” He pets my head, lips forming a smile.

“She’s just being dramatic.” Mingyu spoke from the kitchen.

“Oh come on Gyu, you’re worse.”

Wonwoo laughs.

“Shut up.” Mingyu answered.

I smiled like a kid.

“Come on guys, we need to go complete a mission.” Scoups called out.

I’ve been living with Seventeen ever since I woke up in this strange place.

They found me at my most vulnerable state, and they took me in. They’ve been my brothers and protectors ever since. Since I’ve been with them for almost a year, those nice mannered men had definitely changed. If you know what I mean.

We are currently living in 2032 where humanity has been taken over by the AI and we were a few of those humans left. Before we get on to the present, let me introduce to you to ‘The Boys’

SCoups: The fierce leader who has to take care of 13 + 1 (me) children, who can’t stay still when they are together on normal days. He may be strict and manly, but he has a soft heart in the inside and sometimes will just be a big cute softie. A great combat soldier. You can never win him in fights.

Jeonghan: The second oldest in the group. A huge prankster who also has great skills in a mission. He’s like a mom. I would go to him for emotional support.

Joshua: He’s the gentle sexy guy of the group who has good looks and is smart. He’s good in every language and also good in searching information for missions. I call him Shua hyung like the other guys. He gives me great hugs.

Jun: He’s the most naive guy in this group. But he is also very smart. Tend to find Plan B just in case Plan A doesn’t work out.

Hoshi: Horanghae of the group. Do I have to say more?

Wonwoo: A super cold guy at first. But at first sight I thought he looked like a black cat. He’s a gamer dude so killing robots are actually his speciality. He’s the ace in this. Tall, Black leather jacket, black hair, sharp eyes…you might want to stay away. (whisper) He’s actually a softie inside too, only to certain people.

Woozi: The mastermind behind all the missions. Also the smallest and fittest person in the group. Our group combat trainer.

DK: The clown. But don’t be fooled. He can kill you too.

Mingyu: The big tall athletic muscular guy. Don’t be afraid tho, he’s a huge softie that always gets bullied by his older brothers. He will protect you tho. A drama Queen too.

The8: The kungfu master. Can kill ten in one shot. No kidding. You do not want to piss him off. A advice giver too.

Seungkwan: Mr Boo. He’s my diva. He sings really well but he can be a diva at some times, no actually most of the time. He’s always talkative and I love to talk to him. He’s abit sassy tho.

Vernon: Swag. He and I share the same face expressions.

Dino: The maknae, sometimes I wonder why his hyungs treat him so badly. I mean look at him, he’s such a baby. Sometimes I have to stand up for him. He treats me the best and always gives me dance lessons.

Okay that was a long introduction. Oh and there me, Y/N a girl who just randomly ended up in this big family. Someone who also gets spoilt a lot for being the only girl to exist here. Somehow from what I heard, I have vision powers. And my vision tends to happen. That’s why I was concerned about Wonwoo in the first place.

“Wonwoo stay here, Gyu come with me.”

“Oh come on, you can’t expect me to stay here and wait for you guys to complete the mission right? I’m faster then all of you.”

I rolled my eyes. Him and his ego.

“She’s right hyung, we can do this.” Mingyu answered.

“Don’t worry guys, I’ll stay here and back up.” Joshua said.

“Thanks Shua Hyung.” I waved and ran off with Gyu.

The floor creaked as we entered the building. Mingyu cocked his rifle walking ahead of me, light shining into the dark dusty building. I held my rifle tightly to my body, fingers on the trigger pointing the gun straight ahead preparing to shoot anything that was going to jump infront of me. We walked quietly surveying the place, going to one of the rooms to find the piece Woozi asked us to look for. As we walked deeper in, I sensed something was off. I couldn’t quite tell. The air smelled different. Like there was humans, living here.

I shrugged it off and followed Mingyu. We looked into the room and found the piece that Woozi wanted in a cabinet.

“I got it.”

“Quick let’s go.” Mingyu whispered.

I nodded. We quietly exited the room.

“Wait,”

I turned back towards Mingyu.

Someone is coming. He mouthed.

Panicked appeared on my face.

He placed a finger on his mouth asking me to stay right where I was.

Shit shit shit.

He slowly stepped towards me silently as I slowly retreated back into the room.

Crack.

Shit.

Bullets starting flying towards us.

“Take cover!” Mingyu shouted as we both hid behind this huge slab of cement.

“Shit, how did they know we were here?” I exclaimed.

“I have no idea.” Mingyu answered.

Now what?

“Joshua, we’ve been attacked. Are you guys okay out there?” Mingyu sent a message on the radio.

Bullets we’re still flying as we took turns to shoot back.

I raised my gun towards the enemy as I saw, they were humans. Just like us.

But why?

“Gyu, they’re not AI, they are humans.”

He peek up from the slab of cement. “But they’re still shooting!”

We raised our hands up hoping they would recognise us being the same kind and stopped.

Of course they didn’t.

“Gyu watch out!” I pulled him away as a bullet flew pass my arm, grazing it in the process.

Ah great.

“They’re not humans Y/N.” He said with a serious tone.

“I saw they had blue robotic eyes, with no life in them like they were just ordered to shoot.”

The radio buzzed. “ Gyu, it’s not looking good out here.” Joshua shouted gun firing sounds heard in the background.

What are we going to do? This was an ambush. They know we were coming.

Wait. Wonwoo.

Is this what I saw in the vision?

“Hey Y/N! Listen to me!”

I looked at Mingyu face covered in dirt. He looks bad. Probably I looked like that too.

“We need to get out of here now. You got the piece right?” He told me.

I nodded.

“We can do this. On the count of 3.”

1,

2,

3.”

We held our guns up and shot any many as we can. Mingyu was right, they all had blue biotic eyes, emotionless expressions. Just walking and shooting forward. Their target was us. They were programmed to kill us. We managed to destroy all of them, one by one falling to the floor. I bend down to check if they were dead and saw on their neck there was a mark, and a chip was installed. Biochips on humans. They were creating humanoids. The AI are getting smarter now. Turning the creators into their machines.

Once the building was cleared, we ran out of the building, only to see the car we came in on fire, a pile of humanoids, and Joshua and Wonwoo nowhere to be seen.

“Josh, where are you?” Mingyu said into the radio.

No response.

Did it happen? My vision? Is Wonwoo.. gone?

I was too late.

The sound of roaring was heard from afar.

I turned around my gun ready to shoot…

Two motorbikes were coming our way, with a trail of AI running after them.

“Y/N don’t shoot! It’s them.”

Two guys in black suits, motorbikes roaring.

As one zooms and stops infront of me.

He opens his visor and I immediately recognise those eyes.

“Quickly put this on and get on.”

I fumbled with the helmet as I got onto the bike and put it on.

He grabbed my hands and placed it around his waist.

“Hold on tight.”

A sudden screen appeared inside of the helmet.

[ Player 108 ]

You have received a message from Wonwoo

To be continued…

Part 2? :)

[gatorcatally]

I need help.

My cat has anxiety but he also has a bad habit of tearing things up, carpet, walls, furniture, people if he’s in a bad mood. I’m not evil so I would never declaw him. So I wanted to try claw caps. I was worried about them originally because CJ won’t even wear a collar. If you try to put one on him, he will bite and claw at his own neck until he’s bleeding to get it off. But we needed a solution to his clawing and we tried everything else. Playing, scratch towers, scratch mats, anything his little heart desires but none of it works. He might use his scratch objects occasionally but more often then not he’s destroying my mothers house.

I thought I would at least try the claw caps, they should be comfortable enough, they wouldn’t hurt at all, no scratching. Etc.

Now, after 45 minutes of struggling to get them on him, one is still on crooked even after reapplying it twice because he wouldn’t stop squirming. I’m worried some are stuck on his fur because again he wouldn’t stop squirming, by the time I got to his last paw he was exerting so many smells (he didn’t spray at least), he was shedding heavily, and when I didn’t let him go he straight up but down on my hand and wouldn’t let go. I had to call my mom downstairs to help me. I gave him some of his favorite wet food as a reward and tried to help him calm down because he was starting to hyperventilate from being held tight for so long.

He’s had them on for less than 30 minutes and at first he was just grooming himself which was normal. He was shedding a lot and it was a new sensation on his claws, I thought he might lick them so I wasn’t concerned. I sat down for a few minutes, and he ran under my bed after I finished helping him groom. He wants space? That’s fine, fair, so I let him go.

Not ten minutes later I hear the plastic clicking and grinding. I looked under my bed and boom, purple claw cap. So I told him to stop and tried to pull him out to make sure he didn’t hurt himself taking it off. A few minutes later, two more were off. At this point, he was trying to fucking swallow the evidence! Obviously they’re plastic and could block his digestive system so I grabbed him by his scruff and dragged him out, getting bitten the whole time, but I had to make sure he hadn’t actually eaten any.

I’ve been sitting on my bedroom floor trying to get him to play to distract him but he keeps running away. He keeps biting them off and I’m worried he’s going to make himself bleed, or worse swallow some, and block his digestive tract. I have to go to sleep soon because I have work in about 8 hours and he’s starting to calm down seeing as he’s no longer trying to eat his claws. I’m worried because I work at night, when he’s most active and I don’t want him to don anything stupid while I’m gone.

I also have bad anxiety and the reason he’s my cat now, and no longer the family cat is because I formally adopted him in college to use him as an emotional support animal.

I have given this cat everything he could ever want, and I love him so much but he makes me worry just as much. If anyone has any advice on how to deal with anxious or stubborn cats please tell me. I feel like I’ve tried everything or at least all the normal things and I need advice from real people not articles.

[casspurrjoybell-20]

FOOLS Fall - Chapter 3 - Part 2

BOOK TWO: The 'Fools Fall in Love' Trilogy

*Warning - Adult Content*

Samuel Moretti

At home, it was just me and my parents with Haven gone at college.

'Yes, she was still dating Zach Price. They were on and off every other weekend'.

Plus my cat, Dumbass Junior that Noah got me for our first Christmas together.

I just called him Dummy, sometimes DJ.

My parents were still at work, so it was just me and Dummy.

My cat had definitely become my emotional support animal for sure.

I couldn't even tell you how many nights I cried over a petty argument between either my sister and I or with Noah or when I was just upset over not seeing him and DJ was always there, ready to cuddle with me.

But I also had one other person who had became a good distraction from my lonely thoughts and he was opening my front door, closed it behind him and sat down on the couch.

Carter took Dummy from me and started petting him.

"You know you could knock," I suggested with a dry tone.

"Why knock when you leave your front door open for me?"

That was true, Carter almost always came over after school, after the first two weeks, I started leaving my front door unlocked.

Carter switched subjects before I could answer back with a snarky reply.

"What do you think about Elliot?" he asked, not looking at me as he scratched behind the ears of Dummy.

"Um, I think he's cool," and I also thought he had a crush on Carter but I didn't want Carter to use Elliot as a sex toy and then dispose of him when Carter was satisfied.

I loved Carter 'he had become my best friend' but I also knew how he treated women and men, like shit.

"I heard when you transition into a male, your clit grows to a mini dick, is that true?" Carter genuinely asked me as he was wondering, 'one plus one equals two, right?'

I grimaced at Carter words, not because of what may or may not happen during a transition but that word... 'clit'.

That word had the same effect on me like the word 'moist' had on others.

"How the hell would I know? I don't like... vaginas and I'm not transgender."

Carter rolled his eyes.

"I don't know how someone can not like vaginas"

"I'm gay, Carter, like a hundred percent," I laughed.

"Whatever, what do you think it'd be like to go down on him?" he asked in nonchalance.

"You're disgusting," I told him, standing up and making my way to my kitchen.

"How?" Carter let Dummy go before following me.

"Because you just want to fuck Elliot, so you can 'experience it' and say you fucked someone who's transgender."

Yeah, I may have adapted to Noah's crass language.

"That's wrong. People have feeling, ya' know."

Then, unrelated, I asked him.

"Do youu want Mac and cheese?" as I pulled a pot from under the kitchen counter.

"Yeah, I guess," Carter said like he'd rather eat anything else but I was already adding water to the pot.

Carter continued on about Elliot,

"If I told him it was just a one-time thing before fucking, then I think it's okay," he hopped up on the counter after snatching a box of Cheez-it's.

He opened the recently bought box and put his hand in the bag, grabbing a handful and shoving it in his mouth.

I didn't know how he got laid so much.

I shook my head, chuckling.

"No and I'm pretty sure he's a virgin."

Carter cringed.

"Damn never mind. He'll get too clingy."

"You're the worst," I claimed and that was basically how our friendship worked, Carter made himself at home in my house and said or asked dumb stuff while I told him it was a bad idea.

Or sometimes I ranted about my problems when I couldn't talk to Noah or when my problems were about Noah and Carter listened.

It was a good, platonic friendship.

Carter left before my parents got home a little after five PM and I did homework, hung out with Dummy until around ten PM when I Face-Timed Noah.

I felt giddy thinking about the sexting earlier and wondered if Noah would want to do something similar but when I called him, Noah wasn't alone.

[oceanicartistry]

Claws and All

They sat together, Cat’s sobs broken and tortured, often interrupted by gasps for breath after a long moment of emotion so intense he can’t find himself able to breathe. Dog held him, subject to the push and pull of Cat’s simultaneous embrace and flee, one second grasping at his shirt as though he would leave, get up and walk out the door, and the next pushing him, trying to crawl away in an attempt to free himself from the strong clutch holding him hostage. Dog was confused, so willing to help in any way he could, so desperate to alleviate the pain that Cat’s distress was causing, but so helpless to do so. He didn’t know what was wrong, what cat wanted from him, but he knew the cycle, it was a common one for them. It was one they had gone through too many times, the graze of plush paws quickly followed by sharp claws, a scared Cat reclusing again into his solitudine. 

Cat wished–oh how he’d wished a thousand, ten thousand times–that things didn’t have to be this way, that he didn’t have to be this way, that he could love and be loved without fear, without the pit of rejection sitting in his stomach a way it never had before. When Dog would need him, he would run, hide himself away in uninterested, short texts and ignored calls, fear quickly turning to disgust and annoyance. Annoyance that Dog even could need him, that dog would surely throw him away when his problem was gone, that dog thought he was so stupid to believe him. He knew it was stupid, and he knew it was fake, Dog was genuine in all he did was would rather hurt alone than take advantage of Cat. This thought plagued him as he sat crying in Dog’s arms, he felt unworthy, a terrible man, a worse partner, he clawed at Dog to get away from him, to let him go and urged him to run far away, where Cat could never scratch him again. 

And oh, how many times too, he had longed for dog to just leave, how he wished dog didn’t have to selfishly keep cat in his arms, smothering Cat without second thought; Cat was his own man, he had his own life, dog simply couldn’t understand that. Dog held cat tighter despite his thrashing, doing–to his understanding–all the best he could. The safety was a threat in itself, Dog was suffocating him, Dog thought he was keeping him safe but all he was doing was hurting Cat, just like always–selfish like always. 

But that didn’t sound right. That didn’t sound like Dog?

Cat slowed for a moment, his breathing coming down and his sense returning to him, he knew Dog loved him, and he knew he returned that love, even if it didn’t look that way. Dog was always too good for him, giving him the support that he needed, knowing he needed to just be held and not let go; to let go was to tell Cat that he was not needed anymore, that he was too much, that his emotions had run too far and high this time. But Dog didn’t. Dog’s hold loosened as Cat calmed, cooing “what’s wrong?”’s and “talk to me please.”

Cat’s words didn’t come, but he stopped clawing, and Dog felt those soft pads again replacing the previous digging, itching pain of cats nails. Cat’s tears flowed endlessly from his large dilated eyes, the ones Dog discovered to be so perfect, so readable, now the shape of the moon in the sky at its very fullest, a thin border of color being the only thing remaining of their previous yellow chartreuse. He couldn’t look up at Dog, a sense of shame, so deep that his heart panged in pain, washed over him. Quickly tapping Dog’s arm twice, a small, unspoken request for freedom, he crawled out of dog’s lap, onto the next seat of the couch.

They sat in silence, both sweaty and tearstained, neither knew how long, Dog staring at cat, Cat staring at his hands, the floor, the individual tufts of carpet, the lines in the wood of the coffee table, the glow of their tv–muted long ago–as colors flashed and disappeared with ads and scenes. Cat knew Dog didn’t understand, he could never fully understand how real it was in his mind, the quick switches between push and pull always seeming urgent, so life or death that cat have him, or rid of him. Dog was so loyal, so steadfast, so sure in what he wanted, so unbearably close to Cat. Cat knew they would talk soon, knew the conversation would come and he would tell it all to Dog, all he could muster to bridge an understanding. But for as long as he could, he wanted to sit, wanted to keep the shame of admitting his faults at bay, keep the grasp dog had of him to a minimum. Keep himself away for just a little longer.

I actually don't know how to use tumblr!

Cat also lowk has borderline personality disorder

Inspired by 2 posts!

"So sick of dog motif what about cat motif. I love you but we don't love the same. I can't be near you when you want me to be. Your love is smothering and your need to keep me safe is trapping me. I'm my own person but I don't know how to show you that. I lash out and hurt you even though I don't mean to. I need you to move slowly around me or I'll bolt. I love you, even though I don't say it. If you stay still I'll sit next to you, and even though we don't understand each other we can be together like that." by @/syzygy-yzygy

and!

"crying in your lovers arms, face buried in their chest, while their heart breaks at your every sob" by @/urfriendlywriter

[harrysmimi]

Handsome

Synopsis: One where Harry harbours a little concert crush on someone

Ps. I dreamt this :)

More of my work

YN was very excited to go see Harry finally!

She have been saving for it for ages that she did not hesitate to go just a tiny bit over budget when buying the pit tickets. Her friend was coming too with her. She has been his fan since his first solo album came out and have been wanting to go see him since his very first tour.

Camping out from the sunrise, being exhausted was worth it if she got to see the person who literally kept her sane during her most difficult of times. In fact even save her at some extent.

She was the typical fangirl. But didn't had any of his merch or his vinyls because she couldn't afford it. That doesn't make her any less of a fan. She spent a little too much on the tickets so she had to stick to her closet to pick out an outfit.

She didn't care. Literally. About what she wore. She wore a gown she'd sewn from a bedsheet for an Instagram reel (she just had a public account where she posted a video of her making that dress and it sort of blew up, got about ten thousand likes). It had big puffy sleeves with green leaves printed on the fabric. She didn't know where she'd wear the dress anyway so she pulled it out today.

Though she didn't felt like it, YN did put in some efforts in how she looked, according to her she might bump into a handsome guy or a very pretty girl tonight. People meet at concerts, it wasn't something unusual but rare. She has been single since she last went to prom which was ages ago and her friends have been bugging her to go out so they all can go on a couples only vacation. She is just going to take her Emotional Support cat with, he is only male and a pussy in her life who's not disappointed her yet. It would at least put an end to what her friends have to say when she doesn't find someone at the concert to go on a date with the very next day.

She woke up an hour early to make a sign for Harry. Not a big paper, just a two by two feet thick craft paper. It is big enough for him to read without blocking anyone's view. She was planning to head first so she can stand at the barricade. She doesn't care if she gets crushed. She just wants to have a nice time with her celebrity crush and her best friend.

Oh, and she did picked up a single rose to throw it towards him. Or at least attempt to.

She kept it close to her so no one can steal her idea as she saw many fans making their signs outside. It wasn't very creative, what she wrote but it was her idea. Soon she was let in and luckily her sleep deprivation was rewarded that she got to stand near the barricade.

She stood there, jammed to the pre show set lists and the opening act, waiting patiently for the person she has been dreaming to see for so long. She even made good friends with one of the security guard standing in front of her by the stage. Her heart started racing the moment the love band stepped up on the stage, it would calm down eventually but start pounding again in anticipation of he could pop up anytime on the stage.

He did eventually came up, with his brown guitar as he kick started his show with Golden. He took her breath away, quite literally as he worked and did his job.

An absolute angel, Harry appeared to her. Dressed in a all jean outfit, a vest and his usual pants with his initials on the back pockets in red sparkles. She found it adorable. Though for the longest the initials and three cherries on the back of his vest was only what she saw.

An hour left. Harry was already dreading to go down the stage. He was having a good time, prancing and jumping and running around the stage like a toddler, singing his songs with double sexual meanings to them. That was an ironic combo he liked to call when he'd see his fans talk about him using those exact same words.

He walked around. Care free. Up until someone caught his eyes. Though she blended in with crying and freaking out fans. She had a small sign with her which she held over the barricade. He found that very sweet of her as she wasn't blocking anyone's attention. But what her sign said was even sweeter and melted his head.

Sunshine, you look so very handsome tonight!!! - it said with a yellow iPhone esque smily emoji drawn on the the end. And there was a red rose in her hand.

He felt blood rushing upto his face, warming his cheeks as he read her sign, again, as he sang through Daydreaming. The nickname got him.

YN almost peed her pants seeing that he saw her sign and smiled at her. He was red like a tomato, how pale he was didn't helped to conceal it either in bright artificial lights around him. From then he kept going back to where she was stood, checking in on time to time, her sign was still on it's place. She wasn't filming but she made sure her friend was. At one point she even doubted he was even looking at her and expressed her concern tk her friend.

"He's looking at you idiot," she said, "he's not cross eyed!"

YN liked to believe that in that moment because everything felt like a waking dream to her. She was dreaming with her eyes wide open in all her consciousness, in all her senses. Though she still doubts it's one of those dreams which feels awfully real that when you wake up you feel like it literally happened to you seconds ago.

Harry couldn't help himself but look at the girl with the sign. He'd said it before that he can tell how he feels about someone with just looking in their eyes and he saw how sweet she was through her eyes. Or at least he liked to think so, because she is also so very gorgeous and easy on eyes to look at, like holding onto am Amethyst crystal or places slices of fresh cucumber on your eyes, or getting the perfect amount of sleep at night time.

Is he over exaggeration? Absolutely he doesn't not care!

Before the encore, he stopped to read a few signs. Talk to a couple of people before he went ahead and read her sign out loud because it was just that sweet of a gesture anyone has ever done for him. And he just wanted to talk to her.

"Sunshine, you look so very handsome tonight," Harry read, "why thank you, darling, so do you!" He was flattered all over again, he saw her eyes sparkle as tears brim up in her pretty eyes. She was surprised!

"What is your name?" He asked, crouching down to get closer so he can get her name right, even took off one of his ear piece.

"YN!" She said as loud as she could.

Harry heard it, "YN?" He asked to make sure and she nodded. "Yes, got it right!" He celebrated making the crowd erupt in screams. "Are you from around here YN?" She nodded in no to answer him, "where are you from?"

"India, but I'm here to study." She said, not loud enough but he could read her lips.

"You're here to study? What are you studying, YN?" Harry asked.

The more he kept saying her name the more it made her go crazy inside, and not to mention cry happy tears. Harry knew that so he didn't pointed it out.

"Business?" He said, "that's amazing, best of luck with the rest of your course. Are you having a good time tonight, YN?"

"Yes!" She exclaimed.

"Thank you so much for coming to the show tonight." He stood up because he's got a show to do, "whenever you go back home, give my love to the fans in India. Thank you for bringing such a sweet sign."

"I got you this!" She forwarded the red rose to him holding it at the very tip so it could reach him, standing on her tippy toes as she leaned forward.

"Oh that's for me?" He asked, he didn't hear what she said as he's put his earpiece back on, "thank you." He took it, smelled it.

He went on to introduce the next song, and YN stood there in shock, letting her brain process what the just happened. Just for him to hit her in the face by singing Medicine after two songs. Well, he didn't hit her but it was like a punch in her face. But he still kept going back to where she was stood, not even being subtle about it. The girls around her started to give her side eyes seeing that.

She was looking for the rose she gave him. She thought he threw it away at some other fan like he usually does, but instead she found it hung on the belt hook of his pants.

"He's got a crush on you!" Her friend yelled when he looked at her for the millionth time there.

"Stop it." She mumbled to her friend, feeling suddenly threatened when more people around her started to look at her and even film those little interactions. Being in the fandom YN has closely seen how scary his fans can get, even though he was just looking at her, it made her feel scared somewhere in her heart.

It was best to brush it off and move on and enjoy the rest of the show.

"Do you like know him?" A girl standing next to YN's best friend asked once Harry had ran off stage and everyone was leaving as well.

"Like personally? No," YN answered confusedly and earned a weirded out look from the girl as she walked away.

"Well, she was a bitch." YN's friend commented making her laugh. "See your bedsheet dress caught his eye, now when are you two getting married?" She hooked her arm around YN's as they walked out.

"Next week." YN smiled with a faux-blush and they both ended up in a fit of laugh. "Did you get all the pictures of us?"

"Oh yes!" Her friend nodded. They looked through the pictures both of them took together today, going though the memories they miss already. "Oh my god, I'm going through my post concert depression. How do you feel?"

They both were in a can back to their flat, "I feel like I'm dreaming. I might miss all of this in the morning."

"Did you gals went to Harry Styles concert today?" Their cab driver asked. It was a lady who seemed to be in her mid 40s, she was super sweet and they talked throughout the ride back home, to YN and her friend's surprised she liked his music too.

It was when YN reached that it hit to her that everything happened tonight was real!

She really talked to the guy she has been crushing over for past six-seven years. That made all the sleep disappear from her system even though she. She stayed up going through the videos her friend sent, giggling to herself like a little idiot.

She is idiot for him and she takes all the pride in that.

Tag list:

@vrittivsanghavi @buckymydarlingangel @sweetwritingfanficfriend lemme know if you want to added to the tag list

[perrydowning]

What’s Next for Mrs. Downing

Housekeeping: For a bit, I probably won’t be posting/reblogging Reylo content. If you’d prefer not to read, I’ll be tagging everything of this nature as #personal so folks can hide my posts.

Hello, Beloveds-

The first thing I must do is attempt to express my gratitude for everyone’s msgs of support. The reminder that Mr. Downing is thought of fondly throughout the world is deeply comforting knowledge. Though he presented himself as a confounding puzzle of a person, his needs were few and simple. What made him happiest was when I was happy. He considered himself a gardener and I was his prized flower; he liked nothing more than tending to his favorite bloom.

Writing made me incredibly happy, having my writing read by you folks made me even more happy, so y’all were some of his favorite humans. You were never internet strangers to him because you liked his wife. Anyone who liked his wife was instantly considered a quality person in his book.

In other words, your thoughts, prayers, and words of support mean more to me than you can know because in addition to your kindness, it would have comforted Mr. Downing that so many people are here for me. Thank you.

Now, onto what’s next for me as I sit in the middle of a shattered life. The honest answer is I have no freakin’ clue. The practical answer is that I’m moving back to California. Right now, I can’t handle being alone for more than a couple of hours, and though my sister has managed to schedule one to three people being with me in New Orleans since the day my love passed, I don’t feel right asking people to keep flying to the deep south (during sauna season, no less) indefinitely.

I will begin the drive to the Bay Area on September 20th with one of my dearest and oldest friends. My house is being packed up, furniture sold etc. by my generous friends. I participate as much as I can, but unmaking my life with Patrick is exceptionally painful.

My furbabies will be re-homed because I know I don’t have the ability to care for four kitties as they deserve right now, nor can I keep the physical space to do so. The house is paid for in full, so all of my resources are tied up in the roof over my head. I’m in no shape to find a job let alone actually do said job. Thus, I’m selling the house. Letting go of the kitty family I gathered with Patrick is a looming dark cloud of even more loss, but sometimes the best cat-mom you can be is to find them better homes than you can provide.

For the next *mumble* I will be itinerant. Almost ten folks have offered to host me for, “As long as you need.” I hope I’m able to balance my current state of not-really-sane neediness with remembering that taking too much emotional energy from someone is really not something I want to do.

At first, I’ll be staying with an older friend I’ve had since I was 12 and she took me under her wing. I used to live at her house during the summers while I was in university, so her guest room really does feel like one of my homes.

That’s all I have worked out at this point; I feel pretty good about the decisions I’ve made so far.

Thank you, my friends, for reading this overly long summary of Perry. I intend to post updates about where I am and how I’m doing. And eventually I’ll post when I begin writing again, because it would devastate Mr. Downing if I gave it up out of grief and we can’t have that.

Take care of yourselves, beautiful souls