#let alone at this intensity

[daughterofhecata]

Got my writing session yesterday cut short by a visual migraine that got to the point where I couldn't see the keyboard anymore, and now the damn thing is *back* and idk yet if I'll be able to write later -.-

[s0fter-sin]

something happening on a mission, something personal that has soap spiralling; panic and rage making him reckless, thoughtless, and ghost has to draw the line

“you’re compromised johnny; you know what that means?”

“you’re not pulling me out,” soap immediately snarls. he turns on him and ghost barely recognises him; venomous fear turning his eyes to unyielding ice. "you're not sidelining me; i need to be in this-!"

but ghost has never been afraid of venom; spat or dripped straight from bared fangs.

he snakes out a hand grip the back of his neck, jerking him in a rough shake. "if you can't think, you can't be a soldier," he growls and he flinches like he's been struck.

his lips quiver as they twist in a sneer and he wrenches, trying to free himself of his hold.

ghost doesn't let him.

"it means you give your body to me because your head ain't fucking attached to it anymore."

soap stills, body trembling beneath his hand as he sucks in shaking breaths.

he tightens his grip, pulling him closer and digs his forehead hard into his. “it means you give yourself to me so i can have the weapon that you are and use you the way you're meant to be used."

the ice in soap's eyes fractures.

ghost’s voice drops to a whisper, spoken only to johnny, not this facade of vengeance and pain, and wills it to reach him through the glaciers.

“so i can keep you safe ‘til it’s done and i can bring you back.”

[youngpettyqueen]

I know the decision to have Julian's parents have him augmented was made on the fly but imo its pretty obvious from early on that Julian has Family Issues because he avoids talking about his family like the plague and I think they should've incorporated this into the Julian and Sisko dynamic right from early on because I think it would've made for some really compelling stories and moments and could've set up a REALLY interesting Julian and Jake dynamic which they kinda started to do but never fully went for

[bythepen98]

More Tomarry doodles 😌✨️💚❤️

Au where Harry is constantly struggling bc of Tom's good looks and gestures of affection. He totally has a crush but really REALLY doesn't know how to deal with it.

He's seen either frowning or looking constipated whenever he's by Tom's side and people naturally mistake it as distate/hatred (which technically wouldn't have been wrong back in his old timeline).

In reality, Harry is so down bad for his past nemesis that he's always close to hyperventilating at the proximity between them. With Tom manoeuvring situations behind the scenes so that they can constantly be near each other/are partners in every class they're in, Harry has no chance to relax his heart at all and thus, suffers. It just so happens that his face, misleadingly, reflects that pain. Lmao.

-end (tbc?)

▪︎

Probably my last doodle (of them?) for awhile bc I really need to finish my other wips and I have an upcoming bday project to work on hhhh. Like I'll still make time for them but right now? it's a challenge. /n

[inchidentally]

~you construct rituals of competition with another man as an outlet for feelings you do not want to name or fully understand~

[vaguely-concerned]

in some ways I miss getting to go up to and chat with a companion whenever (especially to smooch your romance option whenever you want. what I'm a sap is this news), but in other ways I love the effect of getting to know them in a more naturalistic/diegetic way by just being around them and listening to what they say rather than by walking up to them and having a marathon 'so what would you say are your values and interests' Q&A session

[sunnefloral]

No thoughts, only coalecroux and wisdom saga at extremely high density

[lgbtlunaverse]

I was watching a clip of the nutcracker on youtube and someone complained about the ballerina dancing as clara because "an adult playing a 12 year old is creepy" and guys. I think we need to shut down takes. No more takes until we figure out what's going on.

[thetardisisnotourdivision]

Hey did I ever tell y'all about the time I dreamed that I had a baby daughter called Ellie that began with my finding out I was pregnant and ended on like her third birthday?

I legitimately woke up thinking "I should go check on Ellie" and then realised she was never real and when I tell you I SOBBED. I've been haunted by an implacable sense of loss ever since. Did I travel to another dimension? Wtf happened because that was insane.

[fear-no-mort]

loving it keep it coming

[sanctamater]

me when at the core of it all amelia is just a traumatised 19 year old girl alone in one of the most abusive, damaging environments she literally can't leave and the fandom just calls her an 'evil stupid bitch'

[sinnbaddie]

Raph post Kraang body hcs

- he’s fully blind in his right eye

- his veins are purplish reddish at spots where the infection was most prominent (arm, chest, face)

- his right arm shakes and he has various levels of numbness throughout, pain is present when numbness subsides

- his motor function is very weak in his right hand (he has to learn how to be dominant with his left hand)

- horrible migraines that can make him bed ridden and unable to move

- initially he couldn’t use his right arm and couldn’t even move for awhile. Remember the Kraang took hold of him fully and for a lot longer than anyone else, he wouldn’t just leave with a scratch on his eye

- hears voices in his head and sometimes talks to them if he’s alone

[lingeringscars]

There is something really beautiful about Simone Biles being regarded as the best gymnast in history, and her still falling/making mistakes/not qualifying for bars final/not placing first always.

[compacflt]

How did Maverick clock Ice as gay? what gave him away?

once again: LOOK AT HIM

he’s a brown-haired man trying too hard to be blond. it’s a metaphor.

[lycanr0t]

thats the longest comic ive ever drawn (walks over to a ditch anf clips through the world)

[thebleedingeffect]

Hmmmmm exploring some weird feelings rn that I'm posting on tumblr dot com because hell I've had this blog for a decade now I can post literally whatever the hell I want now forever and ever. This is my dream journal or whatever the tumblr memes say.

Anyway, it's really strange growing up with neglect, chronic loneliness, and isolation that eventually morphs into severe abandonment issues and generalized anxiety. There's alot of extremely mixed emotions all intertwined in my brain now that I'm actually an adult and can look back and understand just what happened. The severe loneliness years on end and just viciously torturing myself for any perceived fault and clinging onto any scrap of love thrown at me. So much so that at a certain point, I was entirely willing to overlook some major questionable stuff cause I was that fucking starved for attention, friendship, and love.

It's much better nowadays, which I'm extremely happy about because no one deserves to feel like they're such an extreme burden that the people around them would've been better off if you were never born. Or believing that you matter so little and affect the world around you in such a miniscule way that it destroys your ability to even reach out and talk to others. No one deserves that. No one deserves to feel like they're a burden or worthless because they dare to exist and be a human being in the world around them. Bare minimum, absolute bare minimum, is that everyone should feel like they deserve to be on the ground underneath their feet and no one should challenge that.

Which is why I'm very happy to be out of that mindset, even though I can lapse back into it if my anxiety is bad enough. It's also nice that I have friends and a much better understanding of both myself and relationships than I ever did, even if I still feel like I'm stumbling in trying to learn what seems natural to others. It's a slow moving process, but it's one I'm willing to learn because I want to affect the ones I love in the best way possible.

I know all of that, I do, and I know that the acceptable, rational thought is the more healthy approach to relationships, whether that be romantic, platonic, or everything in between. The sort of approach that you know is the right thing to do because you want them to be happy and to have other people in their lives and that you don't own them. You know you can't be their everything, but there's a part of your brain that just wants to fucking grab them and become their everything. I know it's the issues talking, but a part of me just wants to be borderline obsessive and even possessive, so much that I just want to own them and they own me. I want them to be mine, I want to be theirs, I want them to think of me and to love me. I want them to be mine more than anything else in the world.

It's just complicated because it's so mixed up in those issues of abandonment and severe, long term loneliness, and it sucks because I know exactly where it came from, but I can't exactly stop it. The only thing I can do is to just try to work through them and approach something closer to "healthy" that's good for everybody, the thing that they deserve and you know is right. But at the same time... god you want them to be yours so badly, you want to be theirs so badly.

Anyway this has been "echo attempting to process the extreme highs and lows of love and how they're trying to dull down the edges of their teeth after being starved from love, companionship, and intimacy for most of their life"