#lesser of two bums

[ofoceansandtombsanew]

i had a cup of tea and i'm not even gonna look at the shit until everything is done and dealt with. i need it to be the grand reveal already

[ghoulfuckersincorporated]

You’ve got a Deegan headcanon post in the works?👀 helloo heaven

Edward Deegan is hands-down my absolute favorite, lesser discussed ghoul. I wanna climb that big manservant motherfucker like a tree, and I'm so bummed that you can't recruit him as a companion after you finish the storyline he's involved in. If y'all like him as much as I do and you haven't read the Deegan fics on AO3 written by user Iron_Angel, you're missing out big time! They definitely see eye-to-eye with me in terms of how that man would be characterized if he was utilized more.

Edward Deegan (Fallout 4) NSFW Headcanons

Massive slut. Bisexual. Smooth. Some ghouls spend decades, centuries with no intimate contact, too depressed about their circumstances or self-conscious about their bodies to put themselves out there. Not the case with Edward; this man is hot-to-trot and not very discerning about where he sticks his dick, frankly. If the vibe is right in the moment, he's down, and it's gotten him into some very interesting situations before. He enjoys the company (as well as the validation that he's still at least somewhat attractive) and he's always had a pretty high sex drive. Plus, working for the Cabot family for so long ensures he's always dealing with some kind of nonsense that necessitates a lot of stress relief during his off-hours. The number one piece of advice he would give literally anyone is "Don't fuck crazy"; he would also follow that up with a clarifying "Do as I say, not as I do."

110% fucked his way through the entirety of Cabot house. He and Wilhelmina had a one-time fling when he was a young man, before he even became a ghoul, but both of them would vehemently deny anything like that ever happening if you brought it up. He and Imogen always had an antagonistic relationship, but during the rare seasons they were getting along well enough they'd be (hate) fucking on every single surface in the house. The person he had the closest thing to a real relationship with was Jack; the two were quite close, and slept together off and on throughout the years, but ultimately Edward understood him well enough to know that Jack Cabot was too interested in himself and his work to ever really be a good partner to anyone. Edward does want to settle down with someone, ultimately, but he doesn't want to settle, and he has the time to spare to wait for the right person, doesn't he?

BIG DICK IS BACK IN TOWN. Dude is hung and not afraid to show it off (see number one). Definitely more of a "show-er" than a "grow-er", but hey, you're probably not gonna be all that disappointed when a soft 6.5" turns into a hard 7". Pretty large, low-hanging balls. Loves having them played with; put your mouth on them and he's basically in love with you already. Cums a ton, of course, but also cums with a lot of force; careful if you're stroking him off! Protect your eyes!

Ass man, very into anal. Even if you're too intimidated by the size of him to let him actually fuck you in the ass, he'll beg you to let him shove his tongue/his fingers/a plug in instead. About half the time he clocks giving head is actually eating ass. Likes to bite your glutes and the upper part of your thigh to hear you squeal and loves covering your ass in hickeys/bruises.

Big, big domestic kink that cuts both ways. He's spent a lot of his long life taking care of others, so it very much comes second nature to him when caring for a partner. His taste buds may be warped by time and his condition, but he's still a fairly impressive chef, and he's very thoughtful when it comes to doing things around the house that help you out/make things easier for you. You'll really be in good with him if you show a penchant for the same sort of thoughtful behavior, and he'll be ready to bend you over the kitchen counter if he finds out you can cook.

He's got a breeding kink he'd rather not discuss (unless you get a little booze in him and get him alone). Grew up in a big Catholic family pre-war, so the possible origins of the kink weird him out to think about, but that doesn't stop his brain from churning out thoughts about how he should knock you up when he's getting close to finishing. Will definitely gaslight you about it a little bit. No, he did not make you beg him to cum inside you last night; you just get so crazy when you're close that you start begging for it, and what's he supposed to do, tell you no? It's your fault, anyway, for being so attractive and, uh…breedable.

Very playful once you get close to him; he likes horseplay and he enjoys sort of wrestling around, especially because it's an easy way to initiate a little physical contact between him and whoever he's interested in. Also a good way to flex his strength a bit, which has always been an easy way for him to impress. He's also a bit of a bully when he's in the right mood, and it isn't difficult to goad him into being a mean dom if that's what you're looking for.

[haletostilinski]

So, I said my next poll(s) would a character battle, so...here we go!

Now that we finished a wild Ship Battle, it's time to move onto a new set of polls. A character battle. Who do you feel is the best Teen Wolf character? So, a few things first:

I believe I got all the important players. There are 64 Teen Wolf characters I was able to come up with. A few are a bit like "wait, who?" but once again, getting it to 64 characters keeps it nice and even, so a few characters who are lesser known or somewhat forgotten on the whole slipped in there. Quite a bit of the smaller characters *didn't* make it in, though, so I'm sorry if one of the smaller characters that you like didn't make it into this poll. 64 is a lot of Teen Wolf characters, though.

The matching up for this was perhaps a bit more intentional by me than with the ship battle. Mostly to keep it a bit interesting. Although a match up might be kinda 'meh' for the first few rounds for a few of them. But bigger characters might be matched up earlier because there's many of them and they couldn't all be spaced out like I was able to do with the bigger ships in the ship battle polls.

WARNING: Obviously, NO CHARACTER HATE IN THESE POLLS. Keep it civil! You can disagree with the winners if you're bummed yours didn't get through to the next round/didn't win, of course, but don't go hating on the other character or its stans. Also no fighting amongst each other, either. That will not be tolerated and if I see that I will either delete the comment if I can/give a warning/block the user/or if it's too many people going too far I will shut this WHOLE thing down. This is meant to be fun and not serious. Remember that, please.

No character and character stan hate ANYWHERE, on ANY SOCIAL MEDIA PLATFORM. Not on twitter, tiktok, freaking youtube or instagram, wherever.

HATE WHILE LINKING TO AND ASSOCIATING WITH MY POLLS which could mean quoting or replying to someone linking to my poll! - WILL NOT BE TOLERATED

Also, given what happened in the shipper polls, this has to be warned for just incase: If there is ANY significant spike in the votes in a very short period of time - like say jumping 10% points or something in like an hour of time or something (outside of the initial votes being given at first, of course - I will assume botting has taken place. If someone is making more than 1 account on tumblr to vote, i.e. fake accounts, that is also cheating and THAT CHARACTER WILL BE AUTOMATICALLY DISQUALIFIED. Again, with what happened with the ship battle, this needs to be said. NO making multiple accounts or there will be consequences.

Comments/laughing at/hating on a character that's included will not be tolerated. If you're bewildered by a character winning, just keep comments to a very nice and polite "huh?" As I said above, I will shut this whole thing down if there is too much judgement/hate/etc...

Because this is a character battle, there will be two characters per poll. So you're about to see a LOT of poll posts from me...just a warning if you're wondering why there's going to be continued character poll posts from me 😭

As always, every poll will have a 1 week duration. I will show the brackets as they stand below. And after every round, I will show the updated version, pinned to my blog if you're curious to see every winner of every round.

Lastly, have fun! Let's see what character lands on top 😎

Here are the brackets - ignore the numbers on them, the site I used just did that🤷‍♀️ (and you'll have a pretty good idea who the winners will be up against next round as well). I will start posting the polls momentarily (but might not get all of them up right away, that might be staggered.)

[plspush]

Caleb loves everything Halloween, that much is very well known. A lesser known fact is that he has a deep fondness for Christmas. Maybe it's the obvious connection between the two holidays, or maybe it's because most of his wardrobe is cozy and/or winter coded. It's mid November and the wind has begun whipping icily through the primarily bare trees, the sun departs at 5pm, and Caleb's due in just a few short weeks. He knows there's no way he's making it to Christmas with his bun still in the oven. He already feels heavy and sore - practice contractions have been making unwelcome appearances the last couple of days. He knows he has to get all of his December activities out of the way now. He can't go get festive cocktails with Aiden and their friends - he'd feel so bummed to just sit at the bar, uncomfy and so, so pregnant, no fun bevvy in hand - so he and the crew are instead opting to hit up the holiday markets, which luckily opened up at the start start of the month. Jax has taken to protecting the precious bump from the crowds, Maiya has been scoping out all the cute holiday baby merch, and Aiden has been tasked with finding Caleb a hot chocolate that can give him the same vibe as the strong, black, caffeinated hot coffee he's been craving his whole pregnancy. A pretty tall order he isn't sure he can fill. Caleb has been taking in his last few moments with this big round belly, and the last days of the group headcount being four. He smells gingerbread and coffee and hot apple cider, he hears his friends’ laughter among the sleigh bells, and he feels completely full and content for maybe the first time ever. His found family is just so close to becoming a full-fledged family. Maybe pulling through his rough start at life was worth it after all. He’s scared; he had never anticipated becoming a parent, much less giving birth himself. The way his people came through for him though, supported him, made him feel capable. The fact that he has three people willing to do all the Christmas stuff a month early and drag his sore, round, pregnant self around while trying to make everything nice for him and everything go his way… It’s just more than he could have asked for. He’s feeling a solid future ahead of him, when just a few years ago he believed he’d be better off not in this world. He feels community. He /found/ a non-caffeinated, strong hot chocolate that gives him coffee vibes, and it even has sprinkles. He’s okay.

[deathmetalunicorn1]

id also like to ask for strawhats with a present mic!reader please! thank you 😊

-When you first dropped out of the sky, landing on the deck of Sunny, the Straw Hats didn’t really know what to make of you, your clothes were strange and the strange thing that looked like a speak around your neck looked even stranger.

-You kept your cool, using years of experience to keep a level head, as they all inquired who you were, with several of them looking ready to strike if they had deemed you a threat.

-You told them that you had been fighting someone with a strange quirk, who opened a black hole and you fell through it, the next thing you knew, you were free falling over the ocean and landed on the ship.

-Luffy instantly believed you, wanting to know more about quirks, and with deduction on both sides, you were all able to determine that you came from a different world.

-This world had unique abilities as well, but not natural like your world, but via things called Devil Fruits, which grants the eater wonderous abilities, but they lose the ability to swim.

-Usopp, Zoro, Nami, and Chopper, were the only ones who didn’t immediately accept you, for one reason or another, thinking that you could be a threat.

-Luffy liked you and you quickly grew to like this strange little man with a rubber like body, he was loud, cheerful, and you just seemed to vibe with him. Luffy adored learning that you were a professional hero and a teacher, teaching the heroes of tomorrow.

-Robin also was curious about your time as a teacher, surprisingly as an English Teacher, but you also helped with some of the combat classes as well.

-Franky was elated to meet you, as you took off your speaker, showing him the technology behind it, something that got Usopp on your side, as you allowed them to study your speaker. Franky asked you all sorts of questions about the technology of your world, wanting to know all about it, and he was sparkly-eyed to learn as much as he could.

-Sanji enjoyed that you were at least polite and had good table manners, you even offered him help in the kitchen which made you grow even more in his eyes. You knew how to cook as well, but nothing like Sanji, but enough to at least help Sanji here and there.

-You loved Brook, he was so interesting, being a talking and singing skeleton, and he enjoyed that the two of you could enjoy in depth conversations with each other, showing him that you were extremely smart.

-Chopper grew to like you after he saw you getting along with everyone, willing to help them all, as they were letting you stay on the ship in an unknown world that you knew nothing about. You offered Chopper insight into the medicine of your own world, some of which sounded advanced, which made him ask you lots of questions. You tried your best to answer them, but you were a hero, not a doctor.

-Nami took a while to come around, it took an enemy attack with you saving her to get her on your side, when you first showed off your quirk, easily blowing the enemy ship away.

-You didn’t really like the idea of being a pirate, at first, until you learned how corrupt the government was, so in hindsight, being a pirate was the lesser of two evils. The Straw Hats weren’t evil either, which you were easily able to determine, so you had no issues joining the crew when Luffy asked you.

-Nami was appreciative that at least you knew how to budget, saving money where you could, which was win in her eyes, and you were polite to her, asking about her own weapon, curious about the technology behind it.

-Zoro was the last one to welcome you, but you learned that he was like that with most new people who joined the crew. He welcomed you after you saved Nami, easily taking care of the whole ship with one well-placed attack with your quirk, shoving a mug of ale into your hand when the celebration started.

-You were a little bummed that you couldn’t return home, return to your own comforts, your jobs, your friends, but you had found new friends in this new world, as well as a new purpose.

-If those back home could see you now, being a pirate, having a bounty, traveling, and seeing so many odd, at least to you, things- they wouldn’t believe it!

[geekundercover]

X-Men ‘97 episode 1x3 thoughts! Just wanted to elaborate a bit on some of the stuff we saw in Madelyne’s hellscape, namely the nightmare visions for Gambit and Morph, since it feels like there’s some room to interpret with those two as compared to the other members that have had their inner conflicts explored a bit already or are pretty straightforward.

With Gambit, the vision of Rogue and Magneto does seem to go beyond ‘the woman I love is hooking up with another man’ and hits at some deeper insecurity about himself and his character. The vision of Rogue is calling him out as not a good person, not a worthy person, at least not compared to Magneto. It seems like deep down, Gambit does feel an admiration for Magneto despite their previous status as enemies; he’s convicted, he’s a leader, he’s a savior of mutants, and some part of Gambit ranks himself as lesser by comparison, just a ‘nasty, thieving critter’. Magneto is a hero, and by implication, Gambit is not. That’s kinda sad to think about, since Gambit has helped save the world multiple times at this point and has made plenty of selfless actions in the process, but he has always held himself at a bit of a remove from the team and the cause they’re fighting for. Maybe that’s finally starting to get to him, or maybe has always bugged him on some level but his difficulties with trust have never let him overcome that self-enforced distance. If this is laying the groundwork for some sort of character arc, one where Gambit does seek to become more of what he sees as a worthy man, more of a hero, and whether or not that takes a positive or negative trajectory for him, I’m super interested to see it.

As for Morph... Listen, I've been making Morph x Wolverine jokes just like everyone else, they've been Like That since the OG series, but at this point I'm genuinely and seriously sure that Morph is in love with Logan and that's the core of their nightmare vision. Sure, the obvious terror fuel is their Sinister-based trauma, but listen to what Sinister said to them and the context in which he said it: They just left a conversation where they, Logan, and Gambit were discussing relationship woes, and after Logan ditched them to go check on Jean, they looked bummed and said "and then there was Morph." Left alone. Then the visions start, and Morph gets a very naked Logan posing sexily in the shower. Sure they try to make a very "boys in the locker room" sort of joke out of it, but come on Morph, there is no heterosexual explanation (and I do not say that lightly) for going to bug your buddy in the shower by offering to help him with "hard to reach spaces." Then the Sinister quote: "Always with the jokes, eh, Morph? As if I don't know. As if we ALL don't know." I genuinely think Morph is mega gay for Wolverine and is trying to hide it from everyone badly. They may all be mutants, but it is still the 90s, and just because they all have being a mutant in common with each other doesn't mean they're all on the same page in terms of queerness. Again, if this is the case, it's sad to think about. At this point in the animated canon, Morph and Wolverine make FAR more sense as a pairing than Logan and Jean ever did. Logan never gave up on Morph after they were brainwashed in the OG series, went to the literal ends of the earth to bring them back home, so it's no wonder if Morph caught Big Feelings about it but is scared to actually be honest about them.

[blueberrysoaps]

hello i loved your joining bakusquad headcanons !! could you possibly make a part 2 or more bakusquad and reader hcs?? tysm!!

HIIII!! <3

Of course I’m so glad you liked it Anonie!

(And for anyone else wondering my asks are open for requests. For more info go here)

Hope the suffices, and id love to write more too!

M.list

BakuSquad + Reader Headcannons pt. 2 | You get injured edition

Depending on the injuries everyone will react very differently.

For a minor injury (for the mha universe):

Mina was FUSSING over you for days about it.

But also since you couldn’t walk for a bit, she had you in her claws. Now she had a yapping buddy.

She would try her best to cheer you up and fill you in on everything going on! Even if you can walk with crutches and aren’t living under a rock.

Will make others leave you alone cause “you need to rest” when really she just wants to gossip.

Kirishima doesn’t fuss over you too much

But that’s only cause he knows you’re super strong and can take care of yourself!

He’ll help you out with chores, makes sure to get your class work if you missed school because of it.

He doesn’t want to make you feel lesser than for getting hurt by cradling you too much.

But if you can’t walk for whatever reason, and you need to get up. He’ll straight up carry you

“It’s easier” he says.

Denki says he’s showing off.

Speaking of Denki, he’s very sad about it.

Who’s gonna sneak out and go on midnight snack runs with him while you recover.

Sero’s been given short circuited Denki duty. But it’s not the same.

He’ll send you memes until you feel better.

He won’t stop texting you.

Someone needs to make sure you’re not lonely!

Mina silences your phone.

Sero is also chill like Kirishima.

No need to cry over spilled milk

He was worried at first but you don’t seem too beat up about it, so why should he worry?

He checks in every so often

Mostly the same.

Still watches Tv and movies with you

But he takes care to bring your favorite snacks.

Will offer you a… alternative form of pain management if you’re interested 🍃

Bakugo yells at you for getting hurt

He’s not trying to be mean, but if you get hurt over every little thing how can you possibly succeed.

Maybe it was when you two sparred, in that case he’ll feel terrible

He’s wait on you hand and foot while also trying to seem like he doesn’t care.

He’d bring you food then call you dumb

If you need medication he has an alarm of his phone for it, but keeps it silenced so no one notices

Everyone notices.

Every so often while you heal he’d go to your room. Stare at you for a second, then leave without a word.

He’s making sure you’re healing properly and he can tell by the way you look.

If you’re injury was life threatening from a villain attack:

Mina cries when you wake up in the hospital.

She’d never seen you risk yourself like that yet, and it didn’t only scare the shit out of her, but also surprised her.

She knows you’re resilient, but with so many scary things happening around her, she was worried if you’d pull through or not.

She wouldn’t say that though, she’d say how glad she is your awake and try and cheer you up.

A lot of the same from the minor injury actually.

But she’d make sure to also tell you how glad she is to be your friend, and to be more careful next time.

Cause she’d miss you so much! But she leaves that part out in the name of not bumming you out.

Kirishima would try his best to remain positive around you, but that was super scary.

The doctors were saying you may not make it… you didn’t look too good either.

But he knew you’d wake up he had faith.

He’d make sure you were comfortable and wasn’t bothered too much.

He’d tell you he never doubted you for a second!

Denki would be upset like with the minor injury

But multiplied by a million

He’d be so happy when you woke up he shorted out.

Kirishima watched him until he came back and told you how worried he was.

He’d go on and on about how badass you were. How you saved everyone!

Also about how the doctors thought you’d die, which is less cool. It just came out he didn’t mean to.

Sero whacked him for that.

Sero likes to think of himself as a cool guy. Very chill.

Chill only goes so far when your friend is as beat up at you though.

I think he’d be sort of quiet. Like he wouldn’t want to say anything to make it worse.

Maybe he needs to be reassured you’re not so fragile. Probs by Kiri.

He makes sure you’ve got entertainment while you’re in the hospital and that you’re not too screwed up about what happened.

If you have doubts yourself over the villain attack, he’ll reassure you you were the best hero you could be. And it was enough.

Bakugo tells himself he’s not worried at all when you get hurt.

No friend of his is allowed to die, you know that.

But obviously that’s not how these things work. He knows that

Telling everyone to “stop freaking out and do something productive”

While he sits by your bedside.

Even if there wasn’t a chance for him to keep this from happening he’d blame himself to an extent.

I mean you’re apart of the BAKUsquad after all.

I think he’s also quiet to you when you wake up.

Not cause he thinks you’re weak, but cause he’s trying not to crash out.

He’d speak to you alone too. No one else’s business what he talks to you about.

“Don’t do that shit again, dumbass. No one likes a damn martyr.”

Says something about how you’re acting like shitty deku or something.

He still wouldn’t leave your side.

Maybe you make a joke about him being worried and he actually admits it.

Tells you that as soon as your better, you’re training with him from now on. Can’t have you getting hurt over a dumb mistake again.

[captaincapsicle83]

Iron Man

The Avenger series, part 2

Tw: cursing, Tony not following directions

Previous Part

"Dude, you're like a million years old-"

"Excuse me, Ma'am, but I'm a billion! And your closer to zero. You're a baby. Added with the fact that I'm ten times as important as you-"

"Ten times zero is still zero."

"Not the point."

"I just wanna name it," you whined. Tony rolled his eyes, clearly baffled at your audacious manner.

"I picked an acronym before you were even born," He shakes his head, holding up the glasses frames in front of his face, not putting them on.

"Yeah? When?"

"September 21st, of..." He hesitated. "Of 19...93."

"Well, genuis, I was born in 1992-!"

"So me picking the name in the year of 1991 proves me right-!"

"You liar!" You exclaimed. "JARVIS, play back what Tony just said."

Before Tony can object, the ceiling emits his voice, "Of 19...93."

"JARVIS, you're being evicted," was Tony's response. "Pack your things. You're getting uploaded to a surf shop in Daytona Beach."

You laugh, taking the glasses from Tony and putting them into their case.

You were something of an accomplice to Tony's "Iron Man" shtick. You were what he called a "trainee," meaning you didn't fight anybody like Tony did. You practiced, though, and not just in a suit. You did end up giving Tony a black eye, Pepper freaking out over press stuff due to it.

"We can't send you in front of hundreds if people, or broadcast you to millions, if you looked like you run an underground fight club," Pepper exclaimed, pulling his head to the side with a grip on his chin. She looks at you all accusatory like, "You did this?"

"Cool right," you giggle, and pretend to bop Tony on the side of the face again. Peppers eyes roll before she stalks away, heels clicking.

"I'm her favorite," you say as she walks away.

"Nuh-uh."

"Yeah-huh."

☆☆☆

You sat on a gray couch, wearing pajamas and eating a bowl of cereal. A peanut butter reeses brand version of cocoa puffs. It tasted like heaven.

"Iron Man," Tony mumbled, reading a newspaper, standing behind you with Pepper. "Hey, that's kinda catchy."

"Thanks, I came up with it," you say, taking a bite of your cereal. Pepper was doing Tony's "makeup" since he had another bruise on his face, and also, the planned press conference scheduled for today was being broadcasted "everywhere."

Probably not in lesser fortunate countries, but you didn't mention that to Pepper. You wanted to stay the "favorite."

On the TV in front of you, the news was playing. You found the news to be exhausting, and quite morally wounding, but you were to lazy to find the remote and change the channel. You wished you could be watching literally anything else though. You had quite a liking for American children's shows. And Hannah Montana was on at this hour, maybe even SpongeBob.

Tony is given a speech, which he looks over as Pepper thanks Agent Coulson.

You wouldn't. The guy ate the last donut this morning, and he doesn't even live here.

As Pepper and Coulson walk out, you turn around in your seat to look at Tony.

"You aren't gonna read that, are you?" You say, crunching the last bites of your cereal.

"Of course I am, who do you take me for," He winks at you. "Now finish your cereal, and get dressed, we have ninety seconds before we have to be out there, and you look like a bum."

"I'm a squatter, it's the New York in me."

"The only 'New York' in you is Venice Pizza."

"And yet, I'm living in Iron Mans house rent free," you say, putting a false wistful look on your face, as Pepper is walking back into the room.

"He's not Iron Man," she shakes her head.

"Is so," you retaliate, walking away, tilting up your bowl to drink the milk out of it.

"You know, I'm starting to belive I'm not Iron Man," Tony says thoughtfully.

"You're not," Pepper scoffs. "And I'm starting to believe I'm raising two children. Y/n! You better come back out here dressed!"

☆☆☆

"And now, Mr. Stark will be making a statement," A man onstage says. You're on the sidelines with Pepper. You follow her lead, clapping when she does. Smiling when she does.

You were a star student. Have a star.

☆

You knew what was coming though. Oh boy, Pepper wasn't gonna be Happy. And, well, the head of security, who really was Happy, wasn't exactly gonna be a basket of roses himself.

But when was he ever?

"-To consider that I am a superhero."

Fuck up number one; they never said he was a superhero. You sucked in a breath, knowing the house of cards was about to fall.

As Tony stumbled over his words, a soldier whispered in his ear. Maybe something taboo, or maybe to read his cards. Guess the world will never know...

You have to bow your head, as you were already laughing. You felt Pepper smack you shoulder.

"The truth is..."

You pulled in another large breath, looking at Pepper to show you had composed yourself.

"I am Iron Man."

[clonebrainrot]

So I came across an article it was basically Dave Filoni talking about how he does endings

The important quote is

I think that in some ways you want each season to have a feeling of an ending. But in a lot of what I’ve done, I don’t like hard endings”

And this is very true. Look at Rebels, the clone wars and to a lesser extent the bad batch. Although I think a wholly separate post can be made a very long one on Dave’s influence and or lack thereof on the bad batch. It definitely fits into no hard endings.

But I also think you need a hard ending eventually. Sure you could theoretically keep making things with the characters, but eventually I as the creator of stories like to end them. Due to my poor writing skills I have never written my fanfiction down, but while I was younger say between the ages of 8-15 I would verbally tell my friends my stories. The point is. While I am not a writer I have been known to tell a good story. And eventually any good story needs an ending.

But Star Wars currently thrives off the no hard endings rule. Because they always return to the characters.

It’s why I think I have continued to get more and more disappointed with Ahsoka’s continuing story. There were times you could have had great endings for the character such as Twilight of the apprentice.

Hell a hard ending doesn’t even need to be death. Take the bad batch as an example. While the no hard ending rule definitely applies to characters such as Omega, Echo, Rex, Emerie. It does feel like the ending we got for Crosshair, Wrecker and Hunter was the hardest ending we have gotten in Star Wars in a long time. And I am completely happy with that fact.

A story needs an end. Now of course this is my opinion, but if you keep doing soft endings you’ll eventually get to the point in a decade or two where you grow tired of the character and just stop following it up.

Hard endings are important for a story because it means it’s done.

Now I have a feeling many of you may disagree with me. I want to stress though I am not saying soft endings are bad. I liked the bad batch and TCW and rebels. All three shows have soft endings. I am saying following a show up with another soft ending after another soft ending. And then never doing a hard ending is a bad idea. Because eventually you run out of the story and you just end it forever on a soft ending. And that in itself isn’t satisfying. It’s why I personally prefer shorter fanfiction. Or completed fanfiction.

Doesn’t mean I won’t read long stories. I do. But a part of me gets bummed when there is no ending because a creative abandoned it. In the Ahsoka movie Dave has a fantastic opportunity to do a hard ending. Do I think he’ll take it? All signs point to no.

Again this may just be me. But my point here is I do think you should have a general hard ending in mind for characters and plots. And I honestly don’t think Filoni does. Because he likes playing with the characters so much. Maybe he’ll prove me wrong.

Maybe this is why I like the ending of Revenge of the Sith so much. Because while it isn’t a hard ending. In many ways it is a hard ending for those characters. Padme dies. Anakin for all intents and purposes dies and the man Obi Wan was is buried deep down. It’s a hard ending for who those characters are.

Just my two cents.

Also this doesn’t reflect my opinion on spinoffs. I think that’s a wholly different debate.

So I think soft endings are fine as long as you do have a hard ending in mind eventually.

[nian-7]

Hallo :>>> can I request for pjsk boys x gn!reader headcannons when character x reader met in college. If you dont mind, please add whether their respective group/s disbanded or not :') that's all for me and ty in advance <333

hello! sure, please enjoy!!

Tsukasa, Rui, Akito, Toya x gn!reader

✧meeting in college

✧fluff

-Wonderlands x Showtime has become more of a side thing for them. Emu does it the most often though, followed by Tsukasa.

-Tsukasa probably went to college for something in the drama or theatrical department. An actor of sorts, whether it be a stage actor, movie actor, or a voice actor.

-He likely met you through a group project where he needed a partner and you just happened to be sitting next to him that day so why not ask to be partners? No harm in it!

-He'd get along with you fairly easily. As long as you don't push him away, he'll be your friend even without ever verbally asking to be friends.

-Probably asks if you need help and vise versa. You're his friend now and he'd like for you to be able to get through college and pursue your dream as well!

-Again, Wonderlands x Showtime has become more of a side thing for its members. Rui is the least active in it because of college work but, he does occasionally show up for shows.

-He probably had gone to college for some sort of engineering degree. It probably wasn't unlikely that he met you in a class that you struggled in and asked him for help.

-Rui helped you but it wasn't much after that. You both would chat occasionally when you found yourselves sitting next to each other in class or in the halls.

-Probably would accept your offers to come by your dorm or house to work on an assignment together. As long as he has nothing going on, he really doesn't mind.

-Honestly, he likely has invited you to come to Phoenix Wonderland and help work backstage on the automations like Robo-Nene. It was honestly quite a shock to the other Wonderlands x Showtime members when they see Rui there along with a new friend.

-Vivid Bad Squad has probably gone on some sort of hiatus. Both Vivids and Bad Dogs operate still just at a lesser rate. They can't find the time to all get together with their busier schedules.

-Akito likely went to community college. Whether it be because he wasn't sure what he wanted to go to college for or if he just wanted to continue Rad Weekend.

-He honestly probably met you through Rad Weekend. Having you randomly come up to him after Toya and him got off stage and telling him he did a good job! Somehow the conversation spiraled from there into him getting your number by the end of it.

-After that, he'd always text you when he'd be performing at Rad Weekend and you'd always show up. He appreciated it even though it wasn't often that he got to see you.

-With the two of you being in college, study sessions aren't uncommon. He'd randomly bring it up one day and it'd start becoming a near weekly thing for the two of you.

-Again, Vivid Bad Squad would be on a hiatus while Bad Dogs and Vivids operated independently. Toya is a bit bummed about it but, he still is able to go up occasionally.

-Toya likely went to a college on his fathers accord. He likely came to a sort of compromise (if it was even possible) with him about where he'd like to study.

-Most likely, he met you on a walk one day when he was going out for lunch. Whether you were an employee or just another customer, it was a simple and nice chat.

-You both would see each other at the same place every week, whether it be on purpose or not, he's still baffled by how he had gotten your number in such a short amount of time.

-He likes to text you about random things and will always respond to anything you send him. Sometimes you feel like he's waiting for you to text him with how fast he'll respond, even when he's in class sometimes...

please do not repost any of my work without my permission, thank you for reading.

[joltai-showa]

ah shit here we go again, let's reread Naruto again

reading it in official English translation for the first time and really have no idea if it's good or not lol (I've been translating MHA for 5 years straight and official English translation from the same company fucking sucks)

chapter 1 is huge as hell, which is normal for Shonen Jump, mangaka needs to introduce the concept and characters and all yada yada

what I find really funny about Naruto is a lot of the stuff is written backwards (meaning, we have some stuff introduced early on, but then more shit is slapped on top) to the point that pre-Shippuden things directly contradict what is going to be stated later. Kishimoto most of the time gave approximately zero shit about things outright not making sense and, y'know, you gotta respect him for that, cause I don't have balls like that

(unfortunately when writing anything canon-compliant in Naruto you have be mindful of things being rewritten and outright not making sense💀)

Anyway enough yapping, very first page is already ripe with shit that is going to be retconneced later

Firstly, description of Kurama's abilities. Naruto's orange puppy certainly can not start tsunamis and landslides with just his tails, lmao, this is something closer to Ten-Tails. If the terrain allows it, sure, I can see him starting a landslide, but orange puppy isn't starting anything in the seas, he's got siblings with lesser number of tails for that haha.

Secondly, the entire second paragraph feels like a fever dream honestly. "Suffering people gathered the shinobi clans to fight this menace" = Konoha was founded as a way to stop the endless tiny conflicts between the shinobi clans living in the Land of Fire (why have small-scale conflicts between each other when you can have literal world wars with the guys from beyond the border lol, jk, I know Hashirama wanted a peaceful future for the kids, but ultimately hidden villages system solves none of the issues of the previous system besides "7 year olds die on the battlefields" because now we have "15 year olds die on the battlefields"), Kurama literally wanted nothing to do with humans (as far as we know) during the warring states period, he was literally frolicking in some meadows and eating weird twins from to-be Kumogakure, got captured by Uchiha "read some mossy stone that my clan carried for years for some reason and went totally delulu" Madara, was used to attack Konoha, got bitch slapped by Hashirama a few times before Mito stuffed him into her stomach. And people are surprised why is the orange puppy so evil most of the manga lmao. But anyway, the entire sentence also implies that Fourth Hokage had some sort of mega-epic showdown with the evil puppy... while in reality it was something closer to Konoha's nuke being stolen by a delusional angry fourteen year old and Minato had to simply recapture the nuke again.

anyway, that was a long-ass rant lol

love the early style, it's so goofy, Kakashi is especially wonky in it

first question: why are we tying up school kids after they are caught for their terrible pranks? what is the educational idea behind this thing? like, i get doing that on the training field, imitating combat and all, but why do the same thing in the classroom? is it supposed to encourage the kids to learn how to run away after being tied down by some ropes?

(if that's the case i guess i know at least one academy student who always failed this task, yeah, looking at you, rin, i'm sorry, i can't hold myself back from bashing that thing, lmao)

anyway, back to the manga, i really love how it mentions that Naruto flunked this exam two times already (and it's not stated how often this exam is, so I guess yearly?), and only graduates at like 13, which is supposed to be a super late age and Naruto is such a lazy bum for that... but then you realize the funny fact that Naruto's classmates aka "genius" Sasuke, "book-smart" Sakura, team Asuma and team Kurenai are all the same age as him. Lmao. This isn't the first time Kishi will forget about this silly thing called "timeline".

let's... not adress this gag.

AHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH.

Naruto, allow me to introduce you to this wonderful concept called "nepotism". It's quite common in your village. Second Hokage was First's younger brother, Third Hokage was the student of the Second, Fourth Hokage is the student of a guy who studied under Third, Fifth is literally both the granddaughter of First and a student of Third, Sixth is the student of Fourth and you, Naruto, is the son of Fourth and the student of Sixth.

I absolutely love how early Naruto is trying to be this story about this poor underdog when in reality our MC is the nepobaby to ever napobaby lol. I think only Iwa beats Konoha at having the most absurdly nepotistic system for Kage, because 3 out of 4 Tsuchikage are directly related to each other through blood and the one guy that isn't happens to be the teacher to Third.

(I do remember there was so bullshit about Kazekage clan or something but I think it's pretty much only a title and only Rasa and Gaara are actually related to each other through blood)

>badge of adulthood

>given to literal 9-13 year olds who can't throw a kunai in a straight line

yeah, you know what, this actually checks out.

you immediately know that mizuki is fucking evil when he says "nah let him pass iruka, he managed to produce a single shitty clone, he's totally not gonna be killed after 30 seconds on the battlefield" like WHAT IS THIS SYSTEM OF EDUCATION

also another good question to the world building: does Konoha have other schools besides Academy? Like, what do kids do if they don't want to pursue military career? Their parents hopefully teach them how to read and count and that's it? I mean, Konoha is a military settlement at the end of the day, but they can't be teaching only guys who will be throwing knives at each other?

absolutely nothing, naruto, lmao. you were born a nepobaby, prepare to have an endless supply of chakra for any tricks of yours and the best senseis Konoha has to offer.

is the Hokage building supposed to be their residence as well? huh.

also let's not talk about this gag.

comically large kurama jpeg

[kinkyintherealworld]

Sissification - a toxic construction of femininity or getting off on outdated social constructs?

Becca here. 😀

First… I LOVE THAT YOU STARTED THIS DISCUSSION!!!! Thank you so much @youngchastity - who wrote to us (and tagged us in a post) for some healthy discussion around the sissification kink. We’ve definitely had a few things to say about it on the podcast, as have our guests. You can read his post, that started this conversation, here

Rather than speak for both of us at @kinkyintherealworld, I’m going to jump in and answer this from my point of view.

@youngchastity I love your thoughts on gender - I totally agree. I actually reblogged a post by @necromimetics the other day that said: 

“can’t stop thinking about my friend’s cishet partner who said last night that he doesn’t think anyone is the same gender. god-tier take.”

And I agree - we’re all a wibbly-wobbly swirl of masculine, feminine, and everything in between energies, and everyone has their own unique blend. Trying to squash us into labels is lame as hell. 

I like to think I am never one to kink shame (keeping it safe, sane and consensual), and in world where I (and many other women) want to smash the patriarchy, I may be a bit more sensitive to kinks that look down on femininity - or that’s how I have perceived it to date. As someone who has struggled with gender equality issues in real life (your capitalism comment made me give a disgruntled, but amused, snort), it’s hard to not knee jerk react and feel like I need to defend womanhood/femininity. There is still a power imbalance in the world, and equality is still a goal yet to be achieved, but upon dissection, is in the bedroom, playing with kinks, even a place we need to bring this battle? A question that has been raised to me, even before your message.

It’s funny, because I have actually had your very points discussed with me, last fall with my partner, Misty (who if you have read my personal tumblr is trans-personality who enjoys both sides of the gender spectrum fluidly) - we were on a road trip discussing the two episodes you made note of in your post, episode #16 and #19. And Misty, like you, felt we were missing the mark. S/he felt that in no way does sissification for the purpose of humiliation somehow degrade/make fun of/make lesser femininity. For all the same reasons you stated. S/he and I actually talked about doing a podcast about it, to dive more into the topic, Misty felt that strongly. It should be noted that Misty is NOT into sissification or feminization for the purpose of humiliation, and still she felt that we gave the sissification kink a bum rap. 

Hearing her thoughts and yours, I think it is something that should be revisited and, for me personally, I need to take a closer look at why I find it uncomfortable.

Since you made such lovely points I want to try and address each one!

We’ve established that we both agree the trappings around what we consider to be masculine and feminine are made up (and ridiculous). I think, the kink we are talking about here is ultimately humiliation through outdated (but still most commonly accepted) societal norms. IF you get embarrassed about having those things stripped away, and “forced” into the opposite direction… good for you? I mean seriously, how fun is it to get off in weird and wonderful ways with someone who shares your kink from a slightly different perspective! The reality is, I believe, this isn’t hurting anyone. You want a person to lock up your dick, make fun of your little penis (your actual size is irrelevant), or put you in clothing that bends your mind with eroticism and makes you flustered with sexual need - awesome! Life is too short not to enjoy the kinks we have. The bigger question, if I want to dig into the piece that makes me feel uncomfortable is, “Is there misogyny in the specific kink?” - and the answer to that, for me upon reflection, is no. Misogyny comes from the person performing it. So yeah, some kinky things are done with TONS of misogynistic intent… but that isn’t concentrated in one area. Those assholes are everywhere.

To me, feminization is never something that goes hand-in-hand with sissification. My partner feminized himself (their pronouns are all over the place), in a loving way. To empower the feminine in himself. He has often described it as blooming or becoming a butterfly - his higher form of being. So no humiliation to be found, for either of us on either end. I find it hot as fuck when he is all dolled up. 

I haven't dipped my toes into the humiliation via feminization kink (...yet?), so it’s hard for me to wrap my dirty little mind around it. 

Weirdly I do have a bimbofication kink for myself… sometimes. 😁 If I am in a particular mood for the fantasy. I have never found the right time/partner/energy to explore that. Am I feeling humiliation when I go there? I don’t think so…? More the need to feel desired, trophied (yes I made up that word), and used in a deeply submissive way. I’m not embarrassed about that. ;)   I too would be interested in hearing from women who enjoy humiliating others through feminization/sissification, and how they feel about it. Awesome point! 😀

Celebrating feminization! Now that is my jam! 💗 Give me a soft cute boy, and let me make him weak with wanting to be pretty and obedient for me. To me this is a huge mind shift  - the key word “celebrating”, not shaming. Gosh, I could just sink into this topic like the perfect bubble bath. To me, this is a core element to gentle femdom. It is about making boys better… pretty, soft, sweet things that want to please - the D/s element being a key piece. The submissive to be absolutely loved and worshipped for their submission. No shame, not less than me, and certainly not shifting my own very feminine self. I love the feminine. I love to see it in men, and men embracing that side of themselves. Is this a form benevolent sexism? I don’t know. And more to the point, if I am engaging in it with my partners, writing about it on tumblr, and reblogging things that I enjoy around the topic, am I hurting anyone? Food for thought, but I am going to keep doing my thing. ;) I feel like you can look at BDSM here, and for those who wish to criticize it, could for its dynamics. But that feels like a giant, whole other post.    Another thing you mentioned in this point was the strapon, and it’s use as a symbol of power. I have never seen it that way. To me, it is my soul penis… and I love being able to be inside my partner(s). It is an act of love, and makes me want to bring them to amazing places of pleasure (while I get off too). I really don’t enjoy the pictures of women wearing strapons who look like they want to punish their partner with it. But that’s just me. I know lots of people must enjoy that because there is a shit ton of porn that looks that way.

Playing with gender. I like that - and I do it! I love being able to put on a penis!! I really enjoyed trying my hand at Drag King make up and going out as a boy (I’ll post my picture again). I LOVE seeing boys in make up and fucking gender norms right out the window. You said it in your post - gender is made up and stupid. So yeah, let’s play with it, and maybe even break the molds! Though then you’ll have to find something else to get embarrassed and turned on about. ;) Our kinks are about orgasms and pleasure. Let’s enjoy them. In the end, it is all about intent and the people doing it. Not about the kinks themselves. People who want there to be an imbalance of power between women and men will keep doing mean spirited things to keep that nightmare alive - in the streets and in the sheets.

I feel like I have answered your points (I may have jumped around a bit), and I don’t feel the need to argue any of them. Misty had already shone a light on where I may have not been seeing the bigger picture. 

I am SO HAPPY you wrote us a message, and that you took the time to write out your thoughts (that can be read here). So sorry it took me a while to see it and respond! I am always up for conversation and debating (with kindness) any of the points. 

I definitely feel this topic should be a podcast. Any chance you'd like to be on it @youngchastity? ;) 

Hugs! Becca

[ghostlyvallient]

I am a little bummed that the books never show how Thrawn reacted after Thrass. Like in Outbound Flight yeah I get it neither were the main focus, but in Lesser Evil? I love the content of the two we got and how Thrass’s last thought was of his brother, but I want to know Thrawn’s side of this story. Did he scream and cry? Did he space off for hours, unable to bring himself to move? Did Ar’Alani comfort him when he blamed himself?

[summercourtship]

stay to burn (only to drown instead): chapter one: water to tread [part I]

masterpost | ao3 link

jonathan crane x reader; bruce wayne x reader; edward nashton x reader | warnings: canon typical violence, sexual themes | word count: 4218 words

DISCLAIMER: these chapters are not meant to be read alone. not every chapter has content for one of the three pairings listed. this is an ongoing fanfiction that I am cross-posting here on tumblr, not a series of one-shots.

The rain in Gotham was poison on your skin, more acid than water as it hit the city’s streets. It wasn’t doing anything to wash away the grime. Instead, it made it bubble to the surface like a toxic stew of dirt and blood. But you’d lived here for long enough that you were used to it and paid it no mind as you quickly walked home, trying to ignore your water logged shoes and pitifully wet socks. It was much later than you liked being out but your sleazy manager still scheduled you for late shifts despite you repeatedly telling him why you aren't comfortable walking home in the dark.

“Get some pepper spray and don’t flatter yourself.” He’d rolled his eyes when you’d tried explaining, raising his eyebrow as he gestured to your body. You didn’t bother telling him you already had a canister of pepper gel (it’s better than pepper spray) in your purse. And your backpack. And the inside pocket of your usual coat.

You also didn’t bother bringing up Gotham’s stupidly high crime rate and the statistics of violence in the city, knowing it wouldn’t do you any good. You didn’t want to push too hard and end up out in the rain, jobless and soon to be homeless when you wouldn’t be able to afford your rent. And then you’d lose your ability to continue your education, and everything would just keep spiraling downward along the same trajectory until you’re a drophead and trying to bum dollars off the clients outside the Iceberg Lounge.

All of that to say that you had to watch what you said around your boss because you needed your job.

Half of the time, you were able to find someone to cover the night shifts over at the 24/7 convenience store but every now and then they couldn’t (or wouldn’t). And sometimes you decided to just grin and bear it for the money. The shop was understaffed anyway and they made you feel like shit for not being able to work every waking second, even though you explained time and time again why you didn’t want to walk home after eight P.M.

But they thought it would be “special treatment” to only give you the shifts you wanted to work. Or they told you that with the extra money you made you could just order an Uber. But the prospect of getting into a random car was more nerve wracking than the idea of walking home alone at night. So you picked the lesser of two evils and walked.

So, that’s where you were at.

It was better, anyway, to brave the walk home than to be on a bus or in a cab by yourself. At least you could run if something bad happened to you out here. It felt like every other day now there was a bus or train jacking for some asinine reason and you really didn’t want to have to deal with that.

As you walked down the street, you subconsciously adjusted the hood of your rain jacket, but whether you were trying to hide your identity or shield yourself from the rain, it was futile.

Your face was dripping wet, and you were being watched.

You didn’t notice exactly when watching became following (always be aware of your surroundings, but there’s too much to be aware of in Gotham city that you’re bound to miss something), but soon enough you were more than aware of it. A hot itching feeling at the base of your neck started, sending a wave of heat and anxiety over you as you glanced in a passing window to confirm what your mind had been whispering at you.

Three men were following you.

One short and stocky, one tall and gangly. The third, middle one, being completely unremarkable- which is why he scared you the most of the three. It was always those ones who were the most dangerous.

When you stopped at an intersection for the crossing signal to turn in your favor, you glanced around you. Cars sped by, their tires disturbing the permanent puddles on the road. If you were attacked now, would anyone stop? Or would they chalk you up to another number in Gotham’s ever increasing violent crime statistic?

The men had stopped after you halfway down the block, keeping their distance behind you. You allowed yourself to, for a moment, entertain the notion that you were just being sensitive and jumpy. That nothing would happen and you'd get back to your wonderfully warm and horribly cramped apartment with a sigh of relief when you realize that your paranoia had gotten the best of you again.

But in this city, paranoia is akin to safety.

You spared another glance behind you, pretending like you were just checking out the closed lingerie store you had stopped next to while you were waiting for the crossing signal to change. They were leaning against the brick of the next shop down and goosebumps ran down your arms when you saw them looking your way. Really, they were leering and the way they did was enough to set off every alarm bell in your head. Adrenaline burned over your skin as your brain went into a quiet frenzy, trying to figure out how to get out of the situation as safely as possible.

Realistically, you had three options:

Option one: run. (but you must also consider the possibility of falling, being hit by a car if you didn’t look carefully enough, or still being overpowered by the men.)

Option two: fight back. (the option most likely to end with you dead, if you’re being honest with yourself.)

Option three: ??? (there was no option three.)

Turning back to the crosswalk you jolt forward as the little LED man giving you permission to cross the street flashed at you. You quickly crossed, not even checking the street to ensure cars had actually stopped coming. Being hit by a car was the least of your worries (at least they could pay off your student loans).

Sneaking another glance behind you as you rushed onto the other sidewalk, barely sidestepping a large puddle, your heart sunk in your chest when you saw the men start following you again, their dark eyes trained on you like a predator stalking its prey.

Without a second thought, you started running, pressing your way past all the other people walking home. You didn’t even apologize when you jostled them too much and they didn’t seem to care. Really, they barely paid you any mind, adopting the typical attitude of Gothamites: it’s none of my business; I didn’t see anything; I don’t want any trouble.

Always content to stand back and watch, never concerned enough to do anything about it.

You could feel rather than hear your socks squelching in your shoes as you ran through puddle after puddle. You twisted your body, sliding your backpack around to your front. If you could just get your pepper-gel out of your bag, maybe you’d have a chance of escaping this relatively unscathed. Shoving your hand into the front pocket, you fumbled around inside, not caring when your hair ties and period products fell onto the sidewalk. They are replaceable.

Finally, your hand wraps around the familiar canister, your thumb immediately turning it so it was ready to deploy. You should have done this from the moment you left the convenience store but you’d been so ready to leave and so tired that you trusted your luck a little too much.

You’re close to your apartment by now but you won’t risk leading them to your home- your sanctuary. Instead, you make the hasty decision to duck into an alleyway between a diner and a bike shop- both closed for the night. Pressing your back against the dirty brick, you breathe slowly, fighting against your body’s instinct to pant in exhaustion.

You knew that the men were still following you, and that they definitely saw you go into the alley- there were not enough people on this street to hide your movements. All you could do was wait for the light spilling into the alley from the street to be blocked.

You didn’t have to wait a long time- within thirty seconds the slow, wet stomps of boots on the sidewalk drifted into the alley. You held your arm out, desperately trying to keep your grip from wavering.

The second you saw one of the men, you pressed on the trigger of the pepper-gel, but clearly luck wasn’t on your side as it jammed just long enough for the man to rush towards you and knock it out of your hand. It sputtered as it landed in a puddle, useless and dead. The tiny canister hadn’t given you much hope, but even now that was dashed.

The shortest of the men shoved you against the wall, ripping your bag away from where you’d been holding it like a shield against your chest. He threw it to the one who knocked your pepper-gel out of your hand, who immediately began searching through its contents.

The short one slammed you against the wall again, knocking the wind out of your chest, bringing his knee up into your stomach before you could catch it again. You crumpled in on yourself, pulling out every ounce of strength you had to keep your feet steady on the ground. You’re brought back into reality when the tallest man comes behind you and holds you still against him. You lift your impossibly heavy head to stare at the short one, daring him to do what his sleazy smile was implying.

But the man only rears his hand back and punches you across the face.

Pain blossomed from the moment his knuckles met your cheek, an involuntary cry escaping your mouth along with a glob of spit. The man holding you readjusts his grip on you, his arms hooked under your armpits. As soon as you’re able to bring air back into your lungs you renew your struggle against his grip, trying desperately to jab your elbow against the sensitive flesh of his stomach or into his side. Anywhere that might cause him to release his hold on you.

You knock your head back, trying to look up into his face to see if he was bothered yet or if he still had that same self-satisfied grin on his face. But your eyes slip right past his grimy complexion.

Instead, through the sheets of water falling from the sky, through the lights of the buildings, your eyes focused on the clouds. Or rather, what was being projected onto them. It didn’t appear every night but tonight it seemed that somewhere, someone in Gotham needed him.

You certainly did.

“What’s this?” A rough voice broke your focus, wrenching your attention away from the signal in the sky. The one who’d been pawing through your bag held up two thick bundles of money, tied together with rubber bands. You closed your eyes, heart sinking, head dropping against the tall one’s chest.

“Shit!” The tall one laughed at the sight, his chest hitting your back with his boisterousness. But you know it's really not that much cash, maybe $350, certainly not enough to warrant the beating you’d already received. Singles and fives stack up quickly.

You wonder if they’ll be disappointed when they count it out and see it’s not even enough for a month’s rent in this city.

“Now what were you doing to get this?” The stocky one swept his gaze up and down your body, fingers twitching like he wanted to touch you too. “And how much for one night?”

You knew what he was insinuating, but in reality your boss was just shit at paying you everything you were owed on time. Every month or so you’d finally ask him about it and he’d just reach into the register and give you cash. Did it feel illegal, or at least extremely shady? Yes. But you needed the job and you were just getting what you were already due from your work. He’d be in more trouble if he withheld anymore from you than he already did.

“Give it back.” You struggled to get the words out, water and blood pooling on your lips. You tried to wiggle your way out of your captor’s grip again but he didn't let go.

“I don’t think so, whore.” He drops you to the ground, your hip hitting the concrete with a wet thud, landing in a questionably dirty puddle. He swiftly kicked you in the stomach, forcing a wheeze out of your lungs. You curled in on yourself.

The man was rearing up to kick you again, and you wondered if he’s actually aiming for your stomach. In a flash, you can see him missing and instead kicking your face in. You were so certain that this would be what was about to happen that you close your eyes, bracing yourself for the worst pain you would ever feel.

But the kick never comes.

Instead, you hear a deep thud followed by the obvious rustling and scuffing of boots on pavement. Then, the dull sound of punches landing on clothed skin, hushed threats spoken in a low voice.

The men aren’t laughing anymore.

“Go.” It’s not a familiar voice, certainly not any of the three men who’d attacked you. But it couldn’t be who you’re hoping it was, right?

Your bag lands beside you and from the sound of it, it was pitifully empty as the men ran away, almost splashing through the rain in their hurry to leave.

You open your eyes, blinking in the warm light of the streetlamp. You keep your gaze focused on the bricks, watching a soiled band-aid float across the puddle you were currently laying in. Gross.

Two black combat boots stepped into the circle of light, raindrops rolling off the leather onto the pavement.

So it was who you thought it was.

“You’re a bit late,” you cough, grimacing as you attempt to lift yourself. The man says nothing, which is about as much as you expected. You’d read all about him, the masked vigilante running around, trying to save Gotham.

You finally managed to push yourself into a seated position, your clothes now so thoroughly soaked you didn’t mind sitting in the puddle while you attempted to gather your thoughts. You don’t think you could actually stand right now anyway.

“They took my money.” You sighed, more to yourself than to him. “That was like, 30 hours of work.”

How the hell are you going to feed yourself for the next two weeks?

“You shouldn’t be out walking at this hour.”

You finally look up at him, the Batman, narrowing your eyes. Out of all the things he could say, he chose that? You don’t allow yourself to be starstruck, astounded by his overwhelming presence in front of you, instead choosing to be indignant about what he said. How removed from reality it was. You can’t read his expression, what with most of it covered by that mask of his. Maybe he regrets what he said, but it’s just as likely that he sees nothing wrong with it at all.

“I’m going home. I work late.”

Once again, he didn’t say anything, simply watching as you pulled yourself onto your feet. Your footing was shaky but you didn’t feel like you would keel over, at least not immediately. You could make it the few blocks to get back to your apartment.

Then your knee gave out from under you and you’re about to fall right back over when he steadied you with one gloved hand on your upper arm.

Your heart jumps in your chest, any annoyance that you had felt dissipating at his touch.

“Let me help you home.”

His voice cut through the silence between you. Wouldn’t it be nice to be escorted home by the man who saved Gotham on a regular basis? But a moment later your ears pick up the faint sound of a siren in the background and you shake your head, waking up from the awed stupor his presence had put you in.

“I think you’re needed elsewhere.” Bending down to pick up your soaked and empty bag, you gave him a soft smile. “That probably wasn’t for me.” You gesture to the signal in the sky, still projected onto the clouds. You’d always wondered who kept it lit, who decided when the Batman was needed and when he could stay in. As far as you knew, the crime of Gotham never ended. He was always needed.

“Thank you for the offer, though.” You stopped, frowning when you realized that only seconds after you’d finished speaking he had disappeared once again into the shadows.

The rest of your walk home saw your thoughts preoccupied, almost getting hit by a black sedan you’re so distracted.

The Batman had saved you. You! Somebody whose body, if it ever became just a body with no life in it, would’ve barely made a line on the fifth page in the next day’s news.

You moved like a zombie, ambling and slow, through the streets, only waking up from your daze when you arrived at your building. Old bricks with moss clinging on them towered above you, the buzzing light above the main entrance flickering.

Your apartment itself was small, sandwiched in the middle of a hundred year old building that showed its age in the worst ways. The apartment had clearly been renovated at some point to give the main space a more open floor plan, but aside from that it was pretty much exactly as it had been when it was built. Uneven door frames, cracked window panes, creaky floors. But it was your home, your safe haven in this godforsaken city.

Thrusting open the door with a decidedly unladylike grunt (your key got stuck half of the time), you threw your keys on the counter and your bag onto the floor. To your right when you entered was your kitchen, which consisted of nothing more than a few counters in the corner of the main room, complete with a stove in the middle and a fridge on the end of the row. A few nondescript magnets held papers on the fridge- grocery lists, greeting cards, your schedule, a brochure from the Gotham Museum of Fine Art.

You immediately made a beeline for your kettle, filling it with water and perching it back on the stove. In the back of the cupboard is a dusty Bella Reál campaign mug that you should really throw away but can’t bring yourself to. You don’t pick it though, instead pulling out an old Christmas mug. Turning and rummaging through your pantry cabinet, you pull out a well-worn box of Sleepy Time Tea that had been your saving grace this past year.

“God, I wish I was you.” You murmured to the tiny bear on the packet before ripping it open and throwing it into the Christmas mug.

It’s almost November. Close enough. (And you broke your only Halloween mug last week.)

As you waited for the kettle to boil, you moved to the section of the room that you have designated as your living room and office space. Against one wall was a desk with your laptop still open on it, various textbooks, and random documents scattered on its worn surface. Directly next to it (at an uncomfortably close distance, sometimes) was your TV stand with the world’s smallest TV sitting off-center. More books were stacked next to it, ranging from history textbooks to self-indulgent paperback romances. Barely six feet from the TV stand was your couch, and just behind that, with barely any walking room, was a sliding glass door.

You glanced outside the windowed door to your balcony- which was a glorified fire escape, really- and almost shrieked when you noticed a large black silhouette. Heart racing, you yanked open the door, grunting as sticks slightly in the middle. Mustering the most of your strength, you heaved it the rest of the way open.

“How did you find me?” You asked immediately, not stepping away from the doorframe, from the comfort of your warm apartment.

“I have my ways.” The Batman was mostly hidden in the shadows, only the light reflecting off the tiny droplets that had collected on his suit differentiating him from the darkness.

“That didn’t answer my question.” Really, it only raised more. But he didn’t say anything else, so you just sighed and crossed your arms, wincing as the movement sent pain across your skin. “Why are you here?”

Typically, you wouldn’t be this standoffish, even with strange vigilantes that showed up unannounced on your doorstep. But you were tired and had had a rough night- you could say with confidence that it was one of the roughest you’d ever had. Honestly, you just wanted to curl under your duvet and take a nap for three days.

You raised your eyebrows at him, daring him to be the next to break the silence before you realized that he was holding something out to you. It took another second for you to recognize what it was.

Money.

It was crumpled and it was wet but it was money.

“Is… is that mine?” You reach out to take it from him, but he doesn’t let go of it yet. You’re tethered to him, connected by a wad of damp and dirty cash. But you can’t let go of it, you can’t risk him leaving and taking your hard-earned money with him (though you doubt he would do that, given that it's yours).

“What did you do for it?” His voice is quiet in the night air, barely audible over the rainfall and whoosh of cars five stories down below. You resisted the urge to roll your eyes again.

“Honest work, I swear.” You looked up into his eyes, almost glowing in their darkness, hidden being the mask and a layer of dark paint. You wondered, in the event you ever saw him again, if you would be able to tell what color they were. “A 24/7 corner store, the one on Swift and Broad. My boss just… sucks at paying me.” On time or at all.

He released his hold on the money. You immediately draw your hand back into your personal bubble, cradling the bundle of cash against your chest as if it will disappear again. Who knows, maybe one of those insane city pigeons would swoop down from the sky and snatch it from you to use in their nest.

“Thank you.” You broke eye contact with him, looking at the bundle in your hands instead. “I’m sorry to have put you through this trouble. I’m sure there were plenty of other things to do tonight… Other crimes to stop and all.”

Ever since the Riddler’s murder spree last year, Gotham’s criminals really seemed to up the ante. Sure, before, there’d be a few weirdos every couple of years but now… now it seemed like everyone was trying to outdo one another. All vying for Batman’s attention.

If you weren’t so unnerved by it all, maybe you’d laugh. But instead, all you could wonder as each criminal was taken down and into custody… What now? Which nightmare would emerge from the shadows next?

“It was a slow night.”

“Well, I’m glad it was.” I would have been killed if you hadn’t found me.

“Clean your wounds before they get infected.”

“I will, don’t worry.” You both stand there for a few more moments, before the screech of your kettle breaks the silence. You turned to look into your apartment, sighing. “Do you want-”

But when you turn back to the balcony he’s gone, the droning of the rain suddenly deafening.

“-To come in.” You finish lamely, not even knowing what you would’ve done if he’d stayed and said yes. The mental image of him sitting in one of your mismatched chairs at the table was funny but incompatible with reality.

No, him leaving like this was better. You’d never see him again and would just remember the night where he saved you, perhaps think about it- reminisce, like a little old lady- when you saw him on the news.

You closed the door again, locking it and pulling the curtain closed. The familiar, anxiety-inducing smell of money wafts up to you and you put the roll on the small table by the sliding door, your makeshift kitchen table that saw more use as a catch-all table than as an eating surface.

When you count the money later, you may have noticed that there was more in the pile than you’d thought before. And you know for a fact that your boss would rather die than pay you more than what you were owed.

It seemed that Batman was more generous than he came across.

Sighing, you pushed aside the extra amount (almost $200 of extra amount), deciding that if you ever ran into him again, you’d make him take it back.

After all, you were beginning to suspect he hadn’t tracked down the thieves in the first place.

part two

[adarkrainbow]

Tales from Broca street: The witch of the broom-closet

There are two witch-based fairytales in the Tales of Broca Street, and this one is even more famous than The Witch of Mouffetard Street ; in fact, this fairytale is probably the most famous fairytale of the Broca Street collection: La sorcière du placard aux balais. The Witch of the broom-closet.

The story is actually told in the first person as it is mister Pierre himself who is the hero of the adventure. It all began when, looking in his pockets, he found a coin of cinq francs (the "franc" was the currency of France before the arrival of the euro). Thinking himself wealthy with this coin, he decided to go buy a house and went to a notary to find one. The man mistakes his offer for him having five hundred francs, only for mister Pierre to insist: he just have five francs, what house can he buy with it? And the notary is of course appaled (know that the franc was even lesser than a euro, so to have five francs is not even to have five euros). The notary is clear, the smallest amount for a house is two million francs.

But since mister Pierre insists the notary suddenly remembers something... a house he describes as a "small villa located on a big street, with a bedroom, a kitchen, a bathroom, a living-room, a pipi-room, and a broom closet". (The "pipi-room" is actually a joke. The "living-room" part is written in English in the original text, because at the time people thought it was fancier to use the English term "living-room" than the French salon, and so for the toilets Gripari wrote a mock-fancy term, "pipi-room"). And this house is only worth... three francs and a half, but with the notary's own fees, it becomes five francs exactly. Mister Pierre immediately buys the house, but he notices that the notary keeps laughing - the kind of laugh one has after playing a nasty trick... So he asks "Is the house real? Is it solid? There's no problem with it, right?" and the notary says the house is fine.

With the key in hand, mister Pierre visits the house, which indeeds turns out to be a nice, regular little house. He then goes to salute his neighbors, but on one side he only meets a man who shuts his door into his face, and on the other an old lady who keeps wailing and crying "What a misery for someone so young! But maybe you shall escape it, who knows? But it is still so sad to see someone like you undergo something like that." and she refuses to explains herself. Mister Pierre, angry with the situation, returns to the notary's office and threatens him with breaking his head if he refuses to tell him the secret of the house. And so the notary accepts the reveal the truth...

The house is haunted. But not by a ghost... by a witch. The witch of the broom-closet. Mister Pierre otes that he just saw the broom-closet and it was empty ; the notary explains the witch only comes there at night. He explains that most of the time the witch just stands quietly in her closet, not harming anybody. But if anybody sings "Sorcière, sorcière, Prends garde à ton derrière!" (Witch, witch / Beware for your bum!"), the witch will come out and the unfortunate victim wll never be seen again... Mister Pierre, who was already angry at the crooked notary for selling him the house without warning him of the witch's presence, is even angrier, pointing out if the man hadn't sung the song, mister Pierre would have been unable to sing it in turn and everything would have been fine... The notary only answers that he sung the rhyme on purpose to trick mister Pierre, but he escapes before the angry narrator can strangle him.

The rhyme is not one that goes away or is forgotten - but after living one year and a half in the house, very careful of never singing the words, mister Pierre starts to grow comfortable with the situation. He starts singing it in the street, where the witch cannot hear him ; and then in the day, while the witch is not there. After a certain time he grows bolder and starts singing the rhyme at night - but always stopping before pronouncing the last words. The door of the broom-closet shivers, creak, but the witch never comes out. However, one Christmas night, after celebrating with his friends, mister Pierre comes home slightly drunk at four in the morning. And, carelessly, he sings the full rhyme while in the house...

Immediately the broom-closet opens and the witch appears, holding one of mister Pierre's brooms in her hand. She gloats because she has been waiting for two years to punish him, patiently waiting for the day where he would finish the rhyme. Mister Pierre begs her with all he can think about: he pretends he didn't want to offend her, he carelessly sung it, that he has very good friends who are witches, that his late mother used to be a witch, that it is Christmas night and out of the goodness of her heart she can't harm him... The witch finds no pity in her, but she is amused by mister Pierre and so she gives him a trial. She leaves him three days: during these three days he shall ask her three different things, and if she is unable to give them one of these things, he will be spared and she will go forever. However if she brings him all three requests, she will "take him away"... Then the witch disappears and mister Pierre is left quite anxious for his life.

Unable to find any idea, mister Pierre goes to visit his good friend Bachir, who lives rue Broca and owns two magical goldfishes. Bachir brings his fishes (one red, another yellow with black dots), but it is impossible for regular humans to talk to the fishes directly, so Bachir has to summon a helpful mouse with a rhyme ("Petite souris / Petite amie / Viens par ici / Parle avec mes petits poissons / Et tu auras du saucisson") (Small mouse, small friend, come here, talk to my fishes, and you shall have some saucisson). A small gray mouse comes out, starts talking to the fishes with little "hip! hip! hip", and then talks to Bachir who in turn translates for mister Pierre. After mister Pierre told to the fishes all of his story through the mouse, fishes answer (po - po - po) to the mouse, and Bachir translates: mister Pierre shall has the witch for rubber jewels that will shine and glimmer like real jewels. Bachir then feeds both the fishes and the mouse, and mister Pierre returns home.

In the evening the witch appears, and mister Pierre asks her for the jewels. The witch notes that the idea isn't from mister Pierre, but she doesn't care: she gets out of her "corsage" two bracelets, three rings and a necklace, each shining like gold and glittering like diamons, but soft like rubber. The witch mocks him, saying tomorrow he should be more clever, and leaves.

Mister Pierre visits a chemist friend of his in his laboratory to study the jewels and he is amazed to find out that indeed, despite looking like gold and diamonds, these things are made of rubber! Mister Pierre then return to Bachir. The mouse against has to translate for the fishes (pipi pirrippi hippi hip), and the idea this time is: to ask the witch for a branch of the macaroni tree, to plant in his garden. In the evening the witch gloats again that the idea isn't from mister Pierre but she doesn't care - and she against takes out of her corsage a beautiful flowery branch... a tree-branch on which grows macaroni, with leaves made of noodles, flowers made of coquilettes, and little seeds in the shape of alphabet-pasta. Immediately mister Pierre plants the branch in his garden, because he aske for a branc that would grow into a tree and he hopes that if it fails to do so he can escape the witch... Unfortunately by the following day, the branch had turned into an huge pasta tree with vermicelle roots...

Despaired, mister Pierre goes to Bachir to tell him farewell, he will be taken away by the witch. But Bachir refuses to give up: he summons against the mouse and brings out his fishes, and they all talk for a very, very long time. The result is a careful plan mister Pierre must follow to the letter. He must ask the witch to give him "the frog with hair". But she will be stuck, because the witch IS the frog with hair. The "witch of the broom-closet" is just the human shape of the frog with hair. So either she will refuse to give the frog to him, and thus mister Pierre won... Either she will turn into the frog to offer himself to him and win the bet. If this is the latter case, mister Pierre but tie the frog up solidly, to prevent her from growing back into the witch, and then shave all of the frog's hair. Because her magic power is located in it, and once shaved the frog will become just an ordinary animal. Bachir even sells mister Pierre a roll of string to tie up solidly the frog.

When in the evening the witch appears, mister Pierre demands the frog with hair. The witch is furious upon hearing this and asks for something else, getting very mad at mister Pierre, claiming he has "no right" to ask her for this... But mister Pierre insists, and the witch, very angry, decides to show him the frog. The witch starts shrinking and deflating and crumbling onto herself, until she becomes a large green frog with a head full of hair. Immediately mister Pierre captures the frog, ties up very tightly the beast, and shaves all of the hair.

The following day, mister Pierre brings the frog to Bachir as a gift - even adding a tiny ladder so that the frog would act as a barometer. Ever since the frog was brought in the fishes and the frog keep talking to each other (Coap coap / Po po). Curious, Bachir and mister Pierre summoned the little mouse to translate... But she refused, saying that the supernatural animals were just exchanging insults all day long. And the story concludes by mister Pierre saying that if you ever come by his house, you will be free to sing as much as you like "Witch, witch / Beware your bum!"

[aita-blorbos]

Am I the asshole for ditching my best buddy and my brother on a road trip?

Forgive me for not including anyone's ages in this, as I see is customary to this board, but no way to measure age had been yet invented for my people at the time of this story; indeed neither sun or nor moon had risen over our land, and we were lived in twilight eternal.

I will have you know, then, that I was at the time of this tale already mature of age, and a King among my people. It was our great fortune to be invited out of the darkness to the Undying Lands -- to your people, I am told, these are the lands of the Gods, though we call them no such names. Where our lands were of shadow theirs were of light, and we were told of great beauty and lesser danger than our own starlit home. I travelled with two other peoples; I was close in friendship with the King of one of them. For anonymity here I will refer to him as "Fin." My host was the largest of the three peoples. My brother, whom I shall call "Ol" to preserve his privacy, took up one half of it; I led the other. One night, returning from boys' night with "Fin," and wishing for solitude -- for ever he left my mind busy!-- I journeyed alone through a forest. You have seen me describe our lands as dark; be assured this forest was darker, with no stars to guide me. For a moment I thought myself lost, and upon taking a strange turn I found myself in the company of the most enchanting creature I had ever encountered.

Her beauty was beyond compare; her magic such that even now, married to her for centuries, I can find no words for it. I abandoned my journey in heart that instant. Together we gazed into each other's eyes and wove an enchantment.

There is no way to tell exactly how long we stood so, but many say it was at least one hundred years. We returned to my people -- or what was left of them!-- wed. It seems that after many search parties had been sent out for me, most had given up the search and left. None remained who could take me across to the other lands. That suited me just fine. I had come to realize I loved the twilight, and built my kingdom in it with those who had loved their lord well enough to stay.

However, it seems my best friend and brother are probably bummed about this. Was I, as you say, the asshole to abandon my journey?