#leonardo tomato

[localcreeture]

leonardo tomato

[bittertomato]

Oldie for the Lostbelt 6 crew

Castoria is technically all of the above but sharing is caring, Castoria

[seagull-scribbles]

Happy Fathers Day to this mutated rat and whatever he has going on 💕

[transmasculine]

alt:

canon trans character icons!

if youre a weirdo i will fucking block you

dana adler, ella, gakuto, haru, jacques de molay, leonardo da vinci, lev, liezel, madeline

[kursedmayo]

He ate too many tomatoes </3

[fandom-hoarder-official]

Best part of the series is when leo fucks up his surname

[theblueredearedslider]

I Think I was Dyslexic

[zoniks]

Tomato Leonardo:

Descendent of the Tomato clan.

[adorkablecringeworks]

That Color Looks Good on You

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Pairing: rottmnt x gn!reader

Warnings: Mild swearing

Summery: You show off your new lipstick to your favorite dork, Leo. After a series of events, you and Leo come up with a plot for a perfect prank. You’ll ambush every one of his siblings and smother them in kisses with your new lipstick all the while Leo films the whole thing. Let the Shenanigans Commence!

Author’s Note: I originally came up with this as a Leo x Reader. But the way the story progressed, it can be read as any rottmnt x reader as well as either romantic, platonic, or familial. The same can be said for the gender. I was putting on my own lipstick when I thought up this scenario and I thought ANYONE CAN WEAR LIPSTICK!!! So gender neutral it is! Writing in the 2nd person made it easy too.

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Part 1: Neon Leon

You are excited about your new lipstick.

Berry pink.

Not too light. A deep shade without it being too dark.

Putting on the final touches, you admire yourself in your bathroom mirror. It made you feel strong, confident, Dazzling!

“Whadda ya think?”

You strike a pose in your bedroom doorframe, framing your face with your hands. You have returned from your shopping trip and eager to show off your spontaneous purchase. Your favorite mutant turtle ninja lounges on your bed with his snout deep in the newest issue of Jupiter Jim: New Universe H2G2. Not only is he claiming your space as his own… he’s out right ignoring you.

Leonardo Hamato. Your other half, partner in crime, bestie, your first mate. Although Leo would beg a differ on that last part, claiming that since he’s the only one with pirate experience that you would be HIS first mate.

Eeeehhh… Tomato Tomahto.

The point being that you and your Neon Leon give April and Donnie the run for their money for the ‘Besties Awards’.

You deadpan at him. At this point in time, you’re thinking about accepting new applications for the Bestie role.

Meanwhile, that said comic (that is apparently Soooo much more interesting than you) was the purpose of your errand. A favor for him for it was sold out online and the one comic shop that still had it in stock was for pick up only. Donnie had gotten caught up in his newest project, something about a portal device to alternate realities, alternate selves, (other Mad Sciencey stuff) and Apparently forgot to preorder the damn thing. That particular shop just happens to be down the block from your apartment as well as you are the ‘bestest-most-awesome-supreme-person-ever-and-he-loves-you-sosososo-much’.

So much for being the ‘bestest most awesome supreme-’ so on and so forth.

With a huff, you pick up a hoodie you left on the floor, balled it up, and chucked right into Leo’s head. With a ‘THWUMPH’ and ‘hurmf ’, you pounce on him, snatching his comic from his grasp (carefully for you just bought the damn thing), setting it to the side during which you grab your pillow and whack his still covered head.

“I was joking!” He cries out as you laugh maniacally. “I heard you I heard you!”

Fully satisfied with his punishment, you stand up and plop to the side all the while you let him get his bearings. Leo finally frees himself from your shirt and throws it back on to the floor simultaneously sticking his tongue out at you.

Such a drama queen.

You roll your eyes and return the gesture whilst you adjust yourself to sit facing your Leo with him doing the same, finally takes in your lips.

“I like it.” He nods approvingly, “Muy Bien!”

You grin so big your checks begin to ache. But then you notice your turtle going quiet, grabbing his chin as he goes deep in thought.

“You’ll hurt yourself if you keeps that up.”

You know to well how clever he is but that doesn’t mean you won’t give him a ration of shit. It’s in your job description.

It’s Leo’s turn to roll his eyes.

“I was just thinking on about how it would look on me.”

You lean back on your hands and squint at his face for a moment. You then pull out your lipstick form your pocket to hold the color bottom sticker up to him.

“Hmmm I don’t know… I think something more of a red shade would be better for you. You know, to match your moons.”

You love those moons.

“Are you kidding?!” The Bratticus Maximus snatches it out of your hand, “I can totally pull this off!”

You gasp and quickly reach for it back, but Leonardo (being a stupid fucking turtle ninja) easily keeps it out of your reach. Keeping you at bay by smooshing his hand against you cheek.

Where’s the respect?

Then a wicked idea creeps into your mind. You drop your arms and let them hang for a moment causing Leo to pause. You switch your effort. Grabbing his wrist, subsequently tearing it off your face. You then yank him towards you, pulling his face close to yours.

“Well then let’s try it out shall we?”

You lean in, planting a firm kiss to his cheek with an exaggerated ‘MWAH’ .

You take in his face for a moment as he gapes at you.

“Hmm I can’t tell, I need a larger sample size.”

A mischievous grin spreads across your face and in turn Leo balks. He’s on to you. You both are on the same wave length. Even though it isn’t possible, everyone swears you two can Mind Meld together. He goes to shove you with his free hand but you catch that wrist as well, leaving him open.

You attack.

Smooching all over his face, leaving kiss marks in your wake. He cries out as you leave no spot uncovered.

You fall back and admire you work while your dear slider sits there stunned

“I guess I was wrong,” you release him, “That color does look good on you.”

Leo bolts up and dashes to your bathroom to assess the extent of the damage during which you almost fall to the floor cackling.

You await his return, biting your lip, trying to stifle your giggles. However, you fail when he appears back in your doorway.

There Leo’s tries to put on his best sulk (adorable really), crossing his arms as you devolve to wheezing. But who’s he kidding. You got him good. Plus watching you turn blue in the face and on the verge of passing out is pretty hilarious in on it self.

He returns to your bathroom and you're able to gather yourself enough to follow. He give you his signature smirk once he sees you in the mirror where upon poses with his finger and thumb in the L position to under his chin.

“I told you a could pull it off .” His smugness oozing off of him as he looks over himself again. You swear you saw sparkles.

You’re finally able to get yourself under control and you meet his gaze in the mirror as you come up from behind him.

“Yeah ya did stud muffin.” You shoot him a wink. “That’s a good look on you.”

A furious blush blooms across your favorite blue boy’s face to which he responds by bumping his hips against yours as you pull up next to him. In turn, you bump back, pushing him over to make room for you in the mirror.

Chuckles are shared and you lean towards the mirror to reapply your lipstick.

There’s a moment of comfortable silence as you focus on the task at hand while Leo watches you. You and him share glances between each other through the mirror when a plot begins to form. Your shared glances become knowing ones. Insouciantly, you turn to face each other, Leo crossing his arms as you lean against the counter.

Your wicked grin returns to which the leader in blue bares one to match.

Once again, evidence that supports the conspiracy that both you can Mind Meld.

“Sooo…?”

“Sooooo…?

“We should show my brothers how good I look.”

“They’ll be sooooo jelly. We should totally include them so they don’t feel left out.”

Nonchalance is evident in your voices as you converse.

Leo reaches into his pouch to pull out his phone, his brows bounce up and down as he holds it up between you two. Your brows return the gesture in agreement. So, with your lipstick and his phone in hand, you both set off. At your front door, the true blue slider casually opens it and stands off to the side, bowing while holding his hand out. You play along, responding in a curtsy before placing your hand into his. The two of you are barely able to contain excitements check as you both leave your apartment.

You and Leo soon arrive at the lair, ready to set you plan into motion.

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This is my first ever fic!!! For many years I’ve attempted writing. Most never made it past the notes and plot outlines while a few never made it past the first paragraph. My main medium for my creativity has always been drawing so this is a HUGE deal for me!!! Especially since any of possible skill for creative writing I had apparently died back in high school. Thank you and I hope you enjoy!❤️

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[theyhavetakenovermylife]

Shadows Entwined: Part 5

BatmanVsTmnt!Leonardo x sidekick!reader

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 / Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13 Bonus (18+)

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A/N: Boy, did this take longer than I had thought it would. Anyway, it is finally going again!💙

Also, how have I been so thick that I did not know commissioner Gordon is Batgirl’s dad?? My Batman loving little brother would hate me if he knew…

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You learn about a break in at Arkham Asylum and get a little closer to the leader in blue.

Warnings: None in this one. Just a little fun before the horror.

The reader and the turtles are 19.

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You watched curiously as the four mutant turtles started eating their pizzas, causing tomato sauce to be smeared all over their face. And you watched in amusement as they turned down Alfred’s offer on napkins, causing the poor man to enter yet another state of mental crisis. And here you thought your and Damian’s antics in the Wayne Manor was bad enough, but so far the turtles had already caused Alfred more trouble than you and your brother had ever done in a week.

Leo noticed the way you were looking at him and his brothers, and shot you a questioning look.

“Uhm…”, you said, holding a finger up to your face. “You got a little…”

“Oh!”, Leo said in sudden realization, quickly getting his face clean with the back of his hand. Once more you couldn’t help but laugh, and Leo found himself more focused on the beautiful sound instead of the pizza slice in his hand.

As Batgirl was about to take a bite of her pizza, and you finally managed to get a piece from Robin, Batman’s voice sounded behind you.

“Batgirl, Robin, (H/N). Shredder and Ra’s will be looking for something to replace the Cloud Seeder. Any leads on where they might find that?”

“Not right this second, no”, Batgirl said, quickly whipping the pizza grease from her face.

“Then that’s what you should be working on”, Batman said before walking away.

Suddenly the pizza in your mouth didn’t taste as great as it did a few seconds ago. You saw your brother stare down at the uneaten pizza in his hand, before he let out a sigh.

“Yes sir”.

“Come on, dude”, Michelangelo said, following Batman with a slice of pizza in his hand. “You can’t fight crime without partaking in a cheesy slice!”

“This isn’t the time for pizza”, was all Batman said, causing Mikey to stand back in shock and sadness, not believing what he had just heard. This prompted Donatello to comfort his brother with the same pizza slice, soothing his head while shushing him.

A familiar beeping rang out through the Batcave, with the well known bat logo taking over the big computer screen.

“The Bat Signal”, Batman said, turning back towards you and the rest of your bat family. “Robin, (H/N), Batgirl. Let’s move”.

“What about them?”, Batgirl asked, nodding towards the turtles.

“What do you mean, what about us?”, Leo asked, his eyes finding yours for a short second, causing your chest to feel a little lighter. “We’re coming with you”.

“Please no”, Robin said, rubbing the bridge of his nose. “If they come along she'll never keep her eyes straight!”, he exclaimed pointing in your and Leo’s direction. Your face suddenly felt hotter than the pizza slice you ate a few moments ago. You did not dare to look at Leo’s face, but had you done it, you would have noticed how his face has gotten just as hot as yours.

“I don’t know Shredder and I don’t know the Foot. Leonardo and his brothers are important assets”, Batman said, handing Raphael his sai back. “But, you’ll have to follow orders”. Batman eyes narrowed in on Leonardo. “This is still my city”. That comment did not go past the leader in blue. Batman wasn’t just talking about Gotham. He was talking about you as well. Asking Leonardo to follow his order on his ground, and his order when in regards to you.

“Deal”, Leo said, holding out his hand for Batman to shake on, only to be interrupted by Michelangelo, carrying the last of the uneaten pizza.

“We’re definitely gonna want road pizza!”

And with that you left the Batcave and went straight to the source of the Bat Signal. You did not find it surprising, to find the location to be Gotham City Police Department, and you found it less surprising when you saw Batgirl’s father standing on the roof, waiting, mumbling to himself like always.

“Hmm… Ninjas… As if he didn’t have enough problems in this city”, you heard commissioner Gordon say.

“Commissioner Gordon”. The old and tired commissioner turned at the sound of Batman’s well known voice. “What have you got for me?”

“It’s Arkham”, Gordon said, pulling a folder from his jacket. “The alarms went off an hour ago, but when…” He stopped, seeing the company that Batman had brought along. You, Robin and Batgirl was not an unusual sight for him, but four humanoid terrapins. That was something new. “What are those?”

“Teenagers”, Mikey smiled brightly.

“Mutants”, Donnie pointed out.

“Ninja”, Raphael growled.

“Turtles”, Leo finished.

“Have your boyfriend and his brothers been practicing or something?”, Robin asked you in a whisper, causing you to flick him over the head with your finger. Leo swallowed, acting as if he hadn't heard that.

Commissioner Gordon sighed, rubbing his temple, mumbling about a nice retirement where turtles didn’t talk.

“It’s okay Jim”, Batman comforted the commissioner. “They’re friends”. Jim Gordon took a second look at the four mutant turtles, thoughts spinning in his head, until Batman brought him back to reality. “Arkham?”

“Right”, Gordon breathed out, fixing his glasses. “When my people tried to move in they were attacked by ninjas. Like the ones that have been knocking over laboratories”.

“Shredder”, Leo grumbled, punching his left fist into the palm of his right hand.

“We got the perimeter locked down, but we have to assume there’s hostages inside”, commissioner Gordon continued, looking back down into his folder. “Guards, doctors, nurses. I need you too…” Jim Gordon looked up to find that all of you had already left. No trace of the people he just had been talking to. “Sure”, he mumbled to himself. “Leave before I finish, pff, that never gets old”.

You jumped and ran from one roof to another, right in the heels of Batman and Leonardo, listening as they were discussing the information commissioner Gordon had just provided.

“The Foot have been robbing high tech laboratories all week”, Leo said as you ran across the rooftop. “It doesn’t make sense for Shredder to take over an asylum all of a sudden”.

“It doesn’t matter”, Batman said, keeping his eyes ahead of him as you got closer to the edge before the next building. “Arkham and its inmates are too dangerous to take any chances”.

You jumped over the edge and the alley underneath, seeing the moon light cast shadows on the street below, before continuing onto the next roof. You heard as Mikey laughed and roared, riding his skateboard like a mad man.

“Last one there pays the pizza!”, he called out to Robin as he rode past him.

“It’s not a race!”, Robin yelled back in annoyance.

“Not with that attitude it isn’t”, Batgirl said, bringing out her grappling hook, before shooting away over the night sky.

“You gotta step it up, little brother! Otherwise I would like a family size!” you smiled, increasing your speed so you could get ahead of him, inching ever closer to Leo’s side. His blue eyes catching a glimpse of you out of the corner of his eye. “What do you say, Blue? Last one there have to do push ups?”

“Just because I’m a turtle, it doesn’t mean that I am slow!”, he called after you as you raced ahead, a smile spreading over his face.

“I’ll have to see you ahead of me before I’ll believe it!”, you called out, jumping to the next building, your hair flowing behind you as you did so.

Doing his best to ignore the burning look from Batman, Leo sped out, jumping right after you. A laughter escaped you as you noticed he was catching up. Wasn’t all of you on a daring mission on your way to Arkham Asylum, with your father’s heavy gaze right behind you, Leo wondered what he could do when he caught up to you. Would he dare to hug you? Just the mere thought was enough to make him scold himself mentally. Just a moment ago he had thought of what Shredder’s plans might be, and now he wanted to hug you.

Leo watched as you jumped onto yet another roof, a level further down than the one you just came from, way ahead than the rest of Leo and the rest. Disappearing from his vision, Leo couldn’t help but get a little worried. He increased his speed even further, before jumping down to the same roof. But Leo’s worry only grew further when he couldn’t find you on said rooftop. A mild panic managed to settle into Leo’s head, worrying what could have happened to you. Did the Foot take you? Or Ra’s al Ghul? What would Batman say? Were you okay?-

“Boo!”

Leo jumped and turned, finding you laughing your warm laughter. He couldn’t help feeling relieved, seeing your happy smile in front of him. But how you managed to sneak up on him was a mystery. Yet another thing he wished to learn about you.

“I’m sorry, Leo”, you said, holding your stomach in laughter. “I couldn’t help myself”.

“No, it’s okay”, he said, taking the time to admire your face and your smile, just as Robin jumped over your heads and landed on the roof, his feet still moving as he ran.

“You gotta step it up, big sis!”, he yelled over your shoulder. “I doubt Turtle Boy can pay for my deep pan!”

Leo caught a glimpse of your face turning deep red under your mask, before you started running after your adopted brother.

“You little maggot!”

Leo couldn't help but chuckle as he started running after the two of you. Maybe it wasn’t so bad to be dreaming about hugging you. Especially not if you looked that adorable with a red face.

[rhinocio]

ROTTMNT Fanfic Recommendations

Light

You Coveted This Prison by CaveDwellers (April / Donatello - Comedy / Character Study - WIP) THE April O'Neil character study. One part excruciating (for reader and supporting cast) slow burn romance, one part introspection on being true to oneself. Rated M but only for one chapter, which can be skipped. Riddled with laugh-out-loud comedy shenanigans and heartachingly tender intimacy. Hot takes all over the place because the author wrote this with very little fandom involvement, and intentionaly chose to be contrarian in as many ways as possible. April takes down her arch-rival! Raph locks her in a freezer! Casey Junior's keeping secrets! Donatello's wall of horrible fake sciencey souveniers keeps growing and it may or may not be a sign of affection -- he's going to crunch the numbers on that. An absolute blast of a fic, cannot recommend enough.

★

Tried To Grow Up Good by Sroloc_Elbisivni (No romantic focus - Character Study - Complete)

THE Casey Jones post-movie character study. Love is stored in the found family. Casey is an accidental felon. He and Cassandra are siblings now. Anatawa hitorijaNAI let's get the entire two timeline fam in here for a reunion so I can sob myself silly. Perfection. This author's constantly pumping out new fics, and often updating multiple at a time; I've read through and greatly enjoyed Tomato Maze (there is so much serotonin in the knowledge that these idiot turtle boys will do anything for watermelon), Sorrow Is An Autumn Heart (Leo/Usagi but make it a slowburn thriller-drama set in historical Japan), and The Passionate Pools of Salamandria (a post-movie Raph/Mona bodice-ripper with an amnesiac protagonist and a B-plot where the rest of the family fight space to find their missing brother). Honestly this author has the WILDEST takes and everything they write is fascinating.

★

Give Me Something That’ll Haunt Me When You’re Not Around by Taizi (Leonardo / Yuichi - Drama / Romance - Complete)

If you've decided you're finally gonna take a dive into the leosagi crossover ship and see what all the fuss is about, do it with this fic. The author has a strong grasp on how to make a character study about characters first and relationships second, and in doing so has crafted one of THE most tender romance stories I've ever read. Starts as a character study on Yuichi Usagi and the yokai perspective on the Kraang invasion, branches into an exploration of PTSD and what it means to recover, and ends with a friends-to-lovers quickburn that says, "because of you I'm learning to love myself." Leo gets a therapy dinosaur. Yuichi gets out of his head. The character nuance and showing-not-telling is godtier. Healing starts with telling the alien invaders to go fuck themselves. Do not pass this fic up, I promise you it's worth the read. It legitimately made me cry.

★

The Old College Try by Theashemarie (No romantic focus - Action / Drama - WIP)

Donatello cloaks himself human to go to college, and drags his twin brother along. This fic masquerades as a fun, comedy-heavy action adventure story, but under the surface is a really fascinating introspection on what it means to hide your true self in order to fit in. The queer subtext is off the charts! Leo babysits Baxter Stockboy. Mikey gets eaten by a bird. One of the grad certificates is definitely going to be made out to to the wrong Hamato entirely. This fic features an autistic writer writing an autistic character, and their personal experience shines through in the excellent way Donnie's awkwardness and affection are balanced. This author knows nuance; I also highly recommend The Hibernator (apocalyptic timeline and Raph's dead........ wink) and Very Thoughtful (a Donnie-centric low empathy study).

★

Aftermath by Bronte (No romantic focus - Drama - Complete)

The boys deal with the aftermath of the movie events in whatever ways they can. Donnie gets into pina coladas. Leo harasses his brother. Look at these disaster twins bonding! There's a flippancy to all the angst that keeps these lighthearted and love-focused without skipping the rough details. I'm literally never going to recover from the belly bongos scene and will probably end up making art about it. Fantastic read, made me viscerally emotional.

★

At The Bottom Of A Duck-Shaped Crater by CaveDwellers (April / Donatello - Drama / Comedy - Complete) One part worldbuilding for the apocalyptic timeline and one part heartfelt comedy from the perspective of Miyamoto Usagi. Leonardo adopts a babysitter. Casey Junior saves the war effort from collapsing under a dick-measuring competition. April may or may not be about to kill a man. CaveDwellers is among my favourite writers for several reasons, but this fic really highlights her strength in blending several different kinds of relationships in one story and building a plot that delivers achey-breaky sentiments without having to structure everything around romance. (We're also developing projects together; keep an eye out for the "next in series" button at the bottom of the AO3 page for soft apocalyptic stories of a similar nature!)

★

Superfight by Swordfright (No romantic focus - Drama / Comedy - Complete)

An easy-reading one shot! Leo comes to terms with being a teenager, Donnie calls his disability out for what it is, and everybody plays Superfight the card game. The author writes in a very Douglas Adams-y style, resulting in a wheezing-on-the-floor-funny reading experience. If you're burnt out on fandom angst and need a pick-me-up, this is 900% the fic for you. It got me cry-laughing with just the quick refresher glance I gave it to put this recommendation together.

★

Now That's What I Call A Vacation! by WayWardWatson (No romantic focus (?) - Adventure / Crossover - WIP)

This fic's a multi-feature! It's one part infodump about Japan's culture and tourist hotspots, one part study on what it means to cloak your identity to fit into the world, and one part surprise crossover with Usagi Yojimbo. I am OBSESSED with this author's takes on Splinter as a character; several chapters are dedicated to exploring his fixation on being "human again" and trying to juggle the life he once had as a star with the life he now has as a parent of mutants. Primarily this is a feel good adventure story about the Hamato brothers getting in touch with their heritage, but it comes in swinging with several different action/adventure plot points and drama beats to keep a reader invested. Legitimately have no idea where the author's taking things, which makes me all the more excited for the ride!

★

One Step Forward, Fall Forever Back by GriffinStone (No romantic focus - Action / Mystery - Complete)

This fic is one of those slight universe alteration stories that takes a one-off thought and runs with it: what if Casey Junior died on his way through the time rift, spawned into the past as a ghost, and Leo was the only person who could see him? Promise the execution is way less daunting than it sounds -- events move along at a breezy pace and characters never spend very long lamenting the whole dead boy situation. The final battle alone is so chocked full of found family ride-or-die energy between the two protagonists that it's worth the rest of the adventure playing out pretty similarly to the movie. Definitely a treat for those of you who are big on Leo-Casey interactions.

★

A Mixed Bag by MusingWordsmith (No romantic focus - Action / Comedy - WIP)

What if I told you there was a fic where the turtles of every major tv show TMNT iteration shonen anime-style battled their way through challenges in mixed teams of four in order to defeat a team of evil overlords who may or may not know what they're doing re: evillness? Trust me when I say this story is fun -- it blends comedy and drama flawlessly, and the author totally committed to the bit in keeping each version of the turtles loyal to the genre of their individual canons. The 1987 turtles are breaking the fourth wall. The Rise kids are absolute supersoliders. 2003 Michelangelo somehow ended up as the babysitter of his particular faction and is kind of having a crisis about it. I am so beyond impressed at how well this author distinguishes each character and keeps who's who from getting too confusing, which is a common issue in TMNT crossovers. Reading this fic feels like watching literally any version of the show as a kid on a Saturday morning. It is a blast.

Medium

Young Root, Old Rock by SiryyGrey (No romantic focus - Action / Thriller - WIP)  

Shortly after the Kraang invasion a mysterious file of an unreadable format shows up on Donnie's computer, and he's driven by an intense curiosity to decipher exactly what it is and means. This author goes HARD on creating tense, muscle-tensing atmosphere, which is balanced out by extremely tender character interaction. Casey knows something he's not letting on. Donnie makes himself a robo-brain. Leo blows up his brother. You ever wanted an adventure with the blorbos that was also an ARG? Cryptic messages are sprinkled throughout the chapters for readers to decipher. Mind the tags but absolutely do not pass this fic up!

★

No Rest For The Weary by Nekotsuki (No romantic focus - Action / Adventure - WIP)

Ever thought "hey what if the movie just kept going and we found out what happened to those other kraang"? Hello and let me introduce you to THE post-movie out of frying pan and into the fire fic. I have it on good authority that this author was a big name in the 2003 TMNT fic scene, and I suspect for good reason -- this story perfectly blends heart-pounding action with A+ belly laughs and solid found family energy. Donnie hacks cute animal emails and narcs on the enemy. April fights zombies back to back with Barold Draxum of downstairs neighbour fame. Raph gets tranquilizer-darted by his brother for being too emotional. 100/10 wild ride, cannot recommend highly enough.

★

I May Be Invisible, But I Still Look Good by Dandy (No romantic focus - Adventure / Thriller - WIP)

Several TMNT AU competitions have made this fic a household name, and for good reason -- the author's come onto the scene with a bold, fun plot premise: after a battle gone wrong, Leo finds himself alive but unable to be perceived via sight, sound, or touch. Naturally, his family assumes he's dead. While it starts on the angstier side, this story's got a lot of heart and shoves tenderness into every possible crevice; the longer it goes on, the more tears are swapped out for laughter, and anguished dialogue-heavy interaction trades place with high-octane action. Worth sticking with!

★

Creation, Haunted And Holy by Greenglowsgold (No romantic focus - Drama / Thriller - Complete)

I lied about the romance it's Donnie x Technodrome with a twist. This fic reads like fascinating poetry, and does right by its source material by taking one of the fandom's favourite angst catalysts and turning it into a demonstration of the strength of love. Looking for something wildly different? GGG's got you. Would also highly recommend their outside-POV slice of life fic Midtown Mutants!

Dark

The Lemonade Leak by TurtleSoupSwimmer (No romantic focus - Horror / Thriller - WIP)

How do you explain to your family that your twin brother's possessed when you have no evidence, aren't sure if said brother is still alive somewhere inside the zombie, and revealing you know something's wrong could get everybody killed? There is no describing how completely feral I've gone for this fic - the author's technique of starting chapters with small, raw, seemingly unrelated scenes that segue into the current plot and enhance the tone or underlying message of the story is just incredible. They've given the turtles a fascinating mutation feature that adds layers of intrigue to the plot. The character interaction is heckin' tender, we got a nice scoop of self-worth issues from Leo to deal with, and the scary scenes are grip-your-phone-and-stop-blinking scary. The author promises a happy ending but that doesn't make Lemonade Leak any less of an incredibly tense ride. This is a fic I jump on the second I get the AO3 email notification.

★

The Smoking Gun: A ROTTMNT Tactical AU by AlienMadame22 (Donatello / April - Action / Adventure - Complete)

Agent Bishop of the EPF stole four turtle mutants away from their father as children and raised them as militia; dad's gotten back in contact and intends to break them free. This author absolutely took off running with the tactical AU prompt that various visual artists started up, grabbed a handful of canon concepts to mess around with, and mcguyvered together a wild ride of a story that continues to catch me off guard. Strap in for a fic riddled with emotional complexity and character nuance, and come prepared to cry. Fear not the ship tag, as the fic is primarily non-romance-focused and the ship elements are handled in an interesting, convoluted way that works to further the plot and add comedic value. Smoking Gun is a refreshing new concept in a very busy fandom tag and I have been eating it up like candy.

★

The Dawning of the Hour (Series) by Faiakishi (No romantic focus - Horror / Drama - WIP)

Donnie is captured and brainwashed by a pre-Vegeta-arc'd Baron Draxum, who subsequently starts parenting the kid out of guilt while using his talents to fuel the canonical Mutate All Humans takeover plot. It's been often called the Donatello version of Like Father Like Son, but that does its storytelling a disservice - this series goes much deeper in the psychological and physical horror direction, has an underlying political intrigue plot, and spends a generous amount of time with the secondary cast (plus a few excellent OCs) in order to really ramp up the intensity of the premise's whole situation. The first story is very whump-heavy, but does a lot of setup for fic two: The Drax-Daddening, which gives Donnie a friend in Cassandra Jones and finds more space for affection and comedy. The author's ramped up the sources of conflict several times over in the first few chapters of the series' second fic, making rescue by the Hamato feel ever more impossible. Despite being a very complex and interesting read (grey-morality my beloved) I cannot stress enough how VERY not for kids this fic is, so proceed with extreme caution!

[localcreeture]

auugh finally posting this here because i've seen a few people asking for tips on drawing in the rottmnt art style

this is how i first learnt to really nail down how to draw leo's headshape a few years back, but i find with some small tweaks and adjustments it also works well for the other turtles too :3

(also like yeah sans is there too bc it also works for his headshape,,,)

[summersnow82]

Just in Case There's a Phantom: Part 6 of That Familiar Feeling

Author's note: Y'all are fabulous. Thanks for sticking with me. See if you can find my Easter Egg.

Fanfiction_TMNT Bayverse/ 2003 crossover

“Sooooooooo,” Mikey drawled, glancing back and forth between Leonardo and Sean. “This is awkward.” Both were glaring at the other, arms crossed over their chests, and Mikey swore he saw Leo flex enough to make his biceps bulge. Sean, to his credit, seemed unmoved.

Splinter sighed deeply. Clearly there wasn’t going to be any conversation tonight. “I’m going to bed,” he announced.

“Yeah, me too,” Mikey agreed. “Raph’ll probably have her out all night anyway.” Two pairs of blue eyes turned on him with blazing intensity, and he shrugged. “He’ll bring her back home safely,” he assured Sean before turning to his older brother. “Be nicer next time, Leo. She’s a nice girl, and I’m not gonna let you scare her off.” He turned towards his bed then stopped to toss in, “Besides, she likes me.”

Leo rolled his eyes, turning back to Sean. The human hadn’t moved. “I’m curious,” Leo began, and Sean arched an eyebrow. “Raph said he’d watched Annabelle for a week before he grabbed her. If you really are her brother why didn’t he see you, too?”

A slow, satisfied smile slid over Sean’s face. “You really think we didn’t know we were being watched?”

Leo’s brow furrowed. “What do you mean?”

Sean took a step forward. “I mean,” he said coolly, “I knew how to get past all of your booby traps. Belle knew something was coming. We’ve been doing this for awhile. We’ve been trained by others. We’ve been hunted, and we’ve been stalked. We know when we’re being watched, and your brother was not subtle.”

Leo’s frown deepened as he tried to connect the dots Sean was laying out for him. “The star,” he said softly. “Raph’s ninja star.” Sean nodded, and Leo thought he saw a flicker of approval in the man’s eyes.

Leo had forgotten all about that night, but now the memories can flooding back. They’d heard the laughter from the rooftops above, and the delicious smell of mozzarella, tomato sauce, and garlic lured them closer. He saw her first; hair in a high ponytail, dress swirling around her ankles, and her laughter tinkling like music. He had stared, and Raph had noticed. It didn’t help he’d just lectured Raph for an hour on staying in the shadows, accepting their life apart from the humans, blah blah blah. His hot-headed brother swung down into the alley behind the restaurant, and caused enough commotion for her to investigate.

“Raph!” Leo hissed in his brother’s direction, but the red clad turtle ignored him. He was watching the brunette peer around the corner of the building.

“Leave it, Belle,” Sean cautioned, shifting his tray of dirty dishes to the closest outside table. “Loretta left us dinner. Let’s finish up out here and close up. I’m starved.” She’d waved him off, taking a cautious step towards the darkness and away from the light. “Belle!” Another step. “Annabelle, c’mon!”

“Hello?” She’d called out. Raph smirked up at Leo before expertly tossing a ninja star out of the shadows. It landed where he’d intended – inches from her feet. Leo didn’t know what Raph was expecting, but curiosity wasn’t it. She narrowed her eyes, crouching down to pluck the star from the spot it was currently embedded. She fingered the weapon carefully, examining it slowly, before her eyes flickered up to the darkness.

…and precisely to where Raph was currently crouched on top of a dumpster.

“Leo?” She whispered. Another step forward. “Leo?” She said a bit louder this time. Raph hissed in a breath, and shot Leo a withering glare. She opened her mouth to say more, but another star flew out in her direction, this one much more aggressively. She cried out, jumping back as it stabbed the street where she’d been previously standing.

“Time to go,” Sean had told her, grabbing her arm and jerking her towards the restaurant’s back door.

“Wait,” she’d cried, thrusting an arm out towards the shadows.

“Nope.”

“Wait!” Sean wrapped an arm around her waist, scooping her up, and slamming the door behind them. Leo had performed a similar exit with his own brother, but his was less… thoughtful.

Leo rubbed his brow as the memory faded into angry accusations and name calling from his brother, and he looked up to see Sean watching him. “She knew.”

“She hoped,” he said. “She’s been trying to get back to them for a very long time.”

“I’ve been thinking about that,” Donnie said, piping in. “And if you’re up for it I would love to pick your brain about a few of my theories on time and inter-dimensional travel.” He paused. “And I definitely want to know how you got past all my defenses.”

Sean blinked, his eyes shifting from Leo to Donnie. “That was you?” Donatello nodded. Sean’s face split into a huge grin. “Those were amazing! I was really impressed by the engineering.”

Donnie grinned, rubbing the back of his neck bashfully. “I mean, it’s no time machine.”

“Hey, don’t do that, man,” Sean said, walking over to him and patting him on the shell like they were old friends. “Those were some really ingenious works of art out there. The only reason I knew how to avoid them was….” Leo tuned them out as the two men went into a lengthy spiel full of technical terms and jargon no one in their family could comprehend. Donnie didn’t have many people who could understand him on an intellectual level, and it was clear he was loving every moment of this conversation.

Sean’s demeanor had shifted, as well. The blonde visibly perked up as Donatello spoke, his eyes brightened, and soon he was grinning like a kid on Christmas morning. It was obvious he understood everything Donnie was saying, and even more so, he was delighted by this unexpected meeting of the minds. Leo admittedly didn’t understand Sean’s reply, but it was hard to continue hating the man who was currently engaging in brainy geek speak with his genius brother. Leo watched as Donnie waved Sean over to his work station to continue the conversation with visual aids, the two men forgetting about the turtle in blue.

Leo cast his eyes to the exit Annabelle and Raphael had used not too long ago. It wasn’t too late; he could still follow them, and keep a watchful eye from a safe distance. But no. Leo was many things, but desperate wasn’t one of them. He was logical, and logic told him Raph would keep her safe, and bring her home to them. Logic also told him Mikey was right – he’d been acting like a jerk. To her, to Raph, to everyone. Yesterday he had no idea who this woman was, and now suddenly he was acting like a possessive boyfriend because some other turtle had passed on his own emotions and memories? To what end? What was the point of these turtles calling out to him and his brothers? Leo frowned, and tried to think about it logically.

Safety. They wanted to keep her safe. Endearing her to others would certainly do just that.

Home. They wanted her back, and she didn’t seem able to get back to them on her own. Donnie was a genius. Perhaps they were counting on his genius to be a staple in other dimensions, as well. If anyone could get her back to them it would be Donnie.

Leo thought those were excellent reasons on their own, but there was something else tickling the back of his brain. He’d felt the same earlier this evening, and it was gnawing at him. There was something else...something so close he could taste it.

Leo was many things, and proactive was one of them. The itching grew stronger as his resolution grew. He wasn’t going to wait on this other Leonardo to come to him this time. This time he was going to reach out and mind-dominate this turtle until he had all the answers he wanted.

……………….

“He really mentioned my singing?” Annabelle asked as Raph led the way deeper into the sewers. “I wouldn’t have expected that from him.”

“Here we are.” Raph stopped in front of her, and shifted out of the way so she could see their final destination. The sewer tunnel opened up in a dome-like shape with golden orbs clustered together in the middle of the ceiling. The masonry surrounding the globes was far more sophisticated than anything Annabelle had seen on their walk so far with depictions of curling vines, detailed feathers, and stone busts that looked more angelic than gargoyle.

“What… what is this place?” She asked, stepping further into the room, and turning around slowly to take in her surroundings.

“Honestly, we’re not a hundred percent sure. Donnie has some theories about bootleggers.” He paused. “Or vampires,” he said, shrugging. Annabelle shot him a glance, and realized yes, the vampire comment was serious. Then again, if there were mutant ninja turtles and time travelers in these sewers were vampires really that hard to swallow?

“Vampires, huh?” She spun again, slower this time. “Maybe the sewers have a Phantom instead?” She shot him a smirk over her shoulder.

“Freakin’ love that show,” Raph muttered, moving to the far left wall. He leaned back, crossed his arms over his broad chest, and tilted his head back a touch. “Think this will do for an impromptu concert?”

Annabelle cocked her head to the side. “You were serious?” He arched a brow, and she shrugged. “M’kay. I don’t really get it, but why not?” She pursed her lips for a moment, and then nodded as if she’d made a decision. “Just in case there is a Phantom… .” She shot him a grin, closed her eyes, and began to sing.

“Think of me, think of me fondly when we've said goodbye. Remember me, once in a while, please promise me you'll try. When you find that once again you long to take your heart back and be free, if you ever find a moment spare a thought for me.

“We never said our love was evergreen or as unchanging as the sea, but if you can still remember stop and think of me. Think of all the things we've shared and seen. Don't think about the way things might have been.

“Think of me, think of me waking silent and resigned. Imagine me trying too hard to put you from my mind. Recall those days, look back on all those times, think of the things we'll never do. There will never be a day when I won't think of you.”

Raph had been right – this was the perfect place to sing. The acoustics were phenomenal, and any nerves Annabelle might’ve had in the beginning disappeared as she marveled in the way her voice carried.

“I think you should do it.”

“Do what?”

“Sing professionally. I know you’d make a great doctor, but it’s obvious this is what you’re passionate about.”

Leo’s words of encouragement floated to the forefront of her mind as she finished the song. How many times had she caught him silently listening to her play the piano late at night when she couldn’t sleep or singing to herself to calm her anxiety? He’d made her feel so safe, so secure, and so confident with just a nod of his head or a simple smile. It seemed inevitable she would develop feelings for him, even if she didn’t quite know how to define them. Her chest hurt and her throat ached. Why had she chosen that song? The emotional baggage it dredged up was painful to relive.

Raphael’s slow clap jolted her from her thoughts. “Holy shit.” Her eyes flashed open to see Raph staring at her. “He wasn’t kidding. You really do have a set of pipes on you.” An almost feral smile split over his face as he began to walk towards her. “Do you have any idea what this means?”

“Ummmm.” Her nerves skyrocketed as the behemoth in red strode towards her. “No?”

“It means,” he declared once he stood in front of her, “that I am finally gonna beat Donnie and Leo at karaoke night!”

…………..

Master Splinter stressed meditation. It helped calm the warrior spirit, cleared the mind, and provided clarity and reflection. In hindsight, Leo wished his father had done more mental exercises instead of physical ones. Finding the right Leonardo and combing through his memories were proving to be harder than he anticipated.

Pizza, pizza, pizza, Shredder, robot Foot ninjas… wait… no. Wrong Leo.

Rain forests, stone statues brought to life… whoa! Big monster. Wrong Leo.

Leonardo sighed in frustration. Just how many alternate versions of himself were there? He could probably ask Donnie, but he didn’t want the explanation that would definitely follow. He closed his eyes again, took a deep breath, and tried a different approach.

Annabelle. Annabelle. Dark eyes, darker hair, pale skin. Feisty, sassy, thoughtful. Scared, angry, traumatized. Hopeful, gentle, caring. He focused on her image, cleared his mind of all other thoughts, and pushed.

[queengiuliettafirstlady]

Taste of Home

Taste of Home

Fandom: Ikemen Vampire

Pairing: Leonardo Da Vinci x Le Comte de Saint-Germaine

Tag: Established relationship Cooking Kisses Spicy lines Fluff

Word Count  991

Author’s Note: The song is La donna è mobile from Rigoletto written by Giuseppe Verdi.

A little something to celebrate Italy with Leonardo and his lover, in a ordinary day with a normal amount of dishes prepared from our italian chef, much to the delight of the residents, with some sweet and spicy adding, I very much hope will be of your taste like this little dish I prepared myself take a seat and enjoy the feast. 🥰

Tag list

Tag list

@kissmetwicekissmedeadly @aquagirl1978 

@william-rex @writingwhimsey

@fang-and-feather @moonstruckmelancholic

@wistfulwanderingone @rjthirsty @lichtluv

@ike-garden2024 @jollibeeshappiness @starzyquee              

@maeko-kun @rkmaru

You can find me on AO3 as QueenJuliet 😊

Thank you for everyone who will like, reblog, or comment please be gentle with me english is not my first language so please do not leave rude comments I apologise for eventual errors I hope you will like it 😊

It was a summer day at the mansion, the whole nation simmered with perfumes and sounds he never heard of more pleasant, except the ones of his native country, an heavy sigh escaped from his lips at the thought as he shifted around the table, filled to the brim with his skillful hands creations.

La donna è mobile

Qual piuma al vento,

Muta d'accento - e di pensiero.

Sempre un amabile,

Leggiadro viso,

In pianto o in riso, è menzognero.

The fragrant perfume of white bread still warm from the oven placed in a plate next to the baci di dama, the unmistakable aroma of gianduia melted well with the bitter scent of coffee of the tiramisu, the yellow color of the polenta stalked in contrast with the red cover of the lasagna placed next to it, on a side of the candid tablecloth stretched a feast of pasta of any kind and pizza with various filling, enough to satisfy every taste, everything rigorously handmade following the recipes he known by heart. Amidst its chaos stood the improvised cook who do not even remotely cared about any intruder immersed in the task of stirring the red tomato sauce in the pot, carefully blowing air on it before savouring its taste rolling on his tongue as he hummed in delight, his fingers from time to time threw some ingredients in one of the pan like a magician practising his magic in broad daylight, bathing everything in sight in its warm hues.

È sempre misero

Chi a lei s'affida,

Chi le confida - mal cauto il core!

Pur mai non sentesi

Felice appieno

Chi su quel seno - non liba amore!

He let out a chuckle, laughing at the irony of singing about the love for a woman, his parents words ringed still clear in his ear. 

-Do not show us your face unless you have took a wife.-

-Ah if only they knew.

“What are you preparing today ?”

The arms of his husband wrapped around his torso, like the sun brushing away all his dark thoughts, smiling at the soft kiss he left on his neck

“Geez there are people watching us ya know ?” his low chuckle reverberated in his chest, a tone of defiance in his voice he loved so much hearing sing for him in the bed

“Who ?”

“Someone will surely come out of this frat house you create.”

a soft giggle escaped his lips as he pulled away, he leaned against the counter to face him as he spoke.

“I see you have given Sebastian the day off.”

“He deserved it that poor guy acting all up as he is our maid and butler at once.”

He dipped the spoon in the tomato sauce pot once more, bringing the point to his lips, it tasted like home, like the country he could not come back to if not as outsider or traveller, the one he still felt to belong, both italian and french at once even though he far preferred to call himself citizen of the world, inhabitant of the earth, belonging anywhere and nowhere at once, but when the light goes down and he had to find a shelter he knew exactly where to go, the same place he would have kept coming back to over and over again, the one and only he would have chosen in every universe in every timeline even after thousand years he would have still come back home to him, the only man who intrigued him, he felt to know everything and nothing of every time they talked, a mystery he would have gladly spend all eternity discovering, each side of him a precious treasure he collected in his heart.

Before he could do anything he moved to block him against the counter, a cat like smirk on his lips as he stared in his husband’s golden eyes sensual and alluring, leaning over to press a soft kiss on his nose, his gesture made him smile at his boldness, he never was good at masking his own desire, at least not like le Comte taught from a young age to conceal every emotion and so he took action cupping his face in his hands melting his own lips on his, lacing his own hands on his husband’s hips to steady him.

Their kiss was sweet and deep, intoxicating and exhilarating pervading each and every one of his sense leaving him speechless and astounded, butterflies swirling inside his heart, fluttering with all the love he felt for his husband, the sweetest of flavour invading his tongue spreading on his palate, it was the most delicious meal he had ever had in all his life and it was only the first course he though smiling to himself, for the even sweeter dessert that waited for them both in bed, late at night when all the others were asleep and the clock struck midnight signing the start of the time for lover.

Reluctantly they pulled away panting for air, lost in each other's gaze so much to not notice their butler peeking from the doorframe, sliding noiselessly away once he witnessed that forbidden view.

He kissed his forehead tenderly, revelling in the astoundment glimmering in his golden eyes 

“I love you so my ferret.” a smile so bright like the sun itself brightened his gorgeous features

“I love my cat too.” he smiled softly to him, feeling his lips leave a little kiss on his nose making him chuckle, he really did puzzled him one minute he was bold and the other shy, but he knew that despite all their bicker and banter their love was genuine, hidden deep in their hearts only for one another.

Their love confessed countless time with each moan and groan escaping their lips, with every kiss sealing their soul together and that night would have been not exception, basking in the soft alluring gleaming in his eyes at his heartfelt words murmured tenderly on his skin as they laid on their sides looking at one another with only the aster as guardian of their love, because it did not matter how much times they kissed or made love or how many refined dishes they tasted, he always had and always would have been his favourite flavour of them all, because to him his husband tasted like home.

[tilbageidanmark]

MOVIES I WATCHED THIS WEEK #207:

In a week full of many wonderful movies, India Donaldson's minimalist debut feature GOOD ONE was my most precious experience. I've seen all her previous shorts before, and I sensed this will be a 'good one'. And indeed it was. I hope she'll continue to tell super-realistic character studies like this for the rest of her career.

A middle-aged father, his perceptive 17-yo daughter, and another mess of a divorced buddy of his are going on a camping trip in the Catskills. That's the whole simple plot, but it's told with the maturity and eye-for-details of somebody who had intimately known all three. Not much is said, everything is subtle, quiet, and understated. The girl, Sam, got it all together, and the actress who plays her with such raw intelligence is a revelation. One of my best films of the year. 10/10. [*Female Director*]

🍿

2 INDIAN CLASSICS:

🍿 "Forgive me, my son"...

In HOTEL SALVATION (2016), a 77 year old man dreams that his time on earth came to an end, and he's about to die. He decides to go to the holy city of Varnasi, and his son is forced to set aside his office job, in order to accompany him on his last trip. It's a serene, spiritual story, with none of the big events shown on screen - they are all subtle, because they are peacefully inevitable. The director was 25 when he made his debut with this. 💯 score on Rotten Tomatoes.

🍿 DEVDAS (2002) is pure hokum. A classic big-budget Bollywood song-and-dance excess, larger than life soap opera, with 3 mega-stars at their peak: SRK, Aishwarya Rai and Madhuri Dixit. A silly romance defeated by society prejudices, but played in the foreground of elaborate and opulent sets. The music numbers (for example Dola Re Dola, Maar Dala, Silsila Ye Chahat Ka, Sheeshe Sa Sheesha Takraye) were spectacular, the budget for glycerine tears must have been huge, but the super-melodramatic plot was ridiculous.

🍿

For a while now I had planned to re-visit the work of 94-year-old documentarian Frederick Wiseman, but his usual grim subjects deterred me. His latest 4-hour (!) saga MENUS PLAISIRS - LES TROISGROS is a good refresher why this is my type of story telling: Captured footage that observes and don't propagate, and most importantly, no voice-over, no narration, no interviews, and NO FUCKING MUSIC in the background to drown everything you see.

The fact that it's a happy topic, light as a bird song, is a huge help. Like Ken Burns' recent documentary about Leonardo, this is Wiseman’s first outside of the USA. Both of them must have felt they ought to look elsewhere to Europe for shreds of sanity and coherence today.

It's an inside look into the French Troisgros restaurant "empire" in the Loire valley and "how it works". From their spacious kitchens, tomato and cheese suppliers, smokehouse, philosophy, beekeepers, vine cellars, taste making, goats, desserts and the three Michelin stars that they’ve earned for over 50 years. it's an absolute delight from start to finish - the anti-Netflix food-porn destination.

(When I was a chef, I collected about 400 cookbooks, and my two most valuable tomes were (Salvador Dalí: Les Diners De Gala, and) the big book by The Troisgrois Brothers...)

Another one with 💯 score on Rotten Tomatoes.

🍿

3 BY CZECH ANIMATOR MICHAELA PAVLÁTOVÁ:

🍿 Her ŘEČI, ŘEČI, ŘEČI ("Words, words, words") was nominated for an Oscar in 1991. A terrific wordless film about communication, very much in 'Yellow Submarine' style. In a busy cafe, speech bubbles float from people's mouths into others ears in a humorous musical patterns. 9/10.

🍿 Apparently, much of her work focuses on sex. REPETE (1995) open with the act, and then musically returns to it in many different repetitive forms. Uniquely erotic.

🍿 TRAM (2012) is perfect. A full bodied conductress drive her all-male passengers, and with every rhythmic vibration of the trolley, her fantasies gets hornier and she lets herself go. 10/10. (Full Film Above). [*Female Director*]

🍿

Another gen from ol' Czechoslovakia, THE DEATH OF STALINISM IN BOHEMIA, my 4th by mad surrealist Jan Švankmajer. A piece of modernistic agitprop about his country's history from 1948 to 1989. His most political satire, and as usual, full of bloody cut organs made out of exploding clay played to nonstop disgusting slurping, guttural sounds.

🍿

5 BY CROATIAN DAINA ONIUNAS-PUSIĆ:

🍿 In anticipation of her new, heralded A24 debut feature, 'Tuesday', I watched all her earlier shorts:

THE BEAST (2016), is a very odd look at familial abuse. A 75yo woman is angrily taking care of her invalid 100yo mother. Their relationship is uniquely cruel and unpredictable. That is before a mystical bat flies in and settles under the old woman's bed. Super weird!

🍿 WE FIGHT, BUT YOU'RE FABULOUS (2020) was made entirely of stock footage. A terrific pandemic story told only in voice over: A mother and her gay son keep bitching and complaining to each other.

🍿 RHONNA AND DONNA (2015) had an outrageous premise: One teenage sister plays Juliet in their Shakespeare school play, and her conjoined-twin doesn't want to... The mother, in this one, was just drinking wine while doing her yoga.

🍿 PRESS YOUR LIPS TOGETHER, (2011), her early film school work was also about a mother. This mother got bad news about her 13yo daughter. Slight and juvenile.

🍿 So finally, TUESDAY, another tortured saga of unusual mother and daughter relationship. First of all, it's chilly and ambitious, probably like the nightmare baby of Lynch's 'Eraserhead' [which I haven't seen yet] and 'Everything everywhere all at once'. For a young filmmaker making her debut, it's a bold 'Must see'. Mother Julia Louis-Dreyfus can't cope with the upcoming demise of Tuesday, her terminally-ill teenage daughter. A metaphorical Angel of Death, in the shape of mystical black macaw, visits her to help with her pain before he takes her away - and that in the middle of a zombie outbreak. Like 'Alice in Wonderland', their sizes changes, so they all grow and shrink all the time. Etc.

But it was too horror-like for me, and I couldn't connect. 3/10. [*Female Director*]

🍿

"Judicial errors don't exist."

'Somebody is killing the supreme court judges of Palermo, Sicily' in the 1976 ILLUSTRIOUS CORPSES. Tough guy police inspector Lino Ventura is sent from Rome to solve a series of high-profile assassinations, and uncovers collusions, political conspiracies, and corruption at the highest order of society. For me, it mostly evoked one of my favorite kinks, the leisurely sights and sounds of mid-70's Italy, as depicted on film: Dark piazzas, the half-empty alleyways, the paranoia of the communist movement...

(On a recommendation by my friend HootsMaguire.)

🍿

A WOMAN INTERVIEWED IN ONE CONTINUED SHOT X 2:

🍿 I never heard of the 1993 French masterpiece EMILIE MULLER, but as soon as I finished watching it, I had to watch it again, and then a third time! A young woman arrives for her first ever audition where she's asked to show the contents of her handbag. 10/10. It reminded me very much of another of my French favorites On S'Embrasse?

🍿 In BETTY TELLS A STORY (1972) a woman remembers how she once bought an expensive dress that she couldn't effort and never got to wear, and then tells the same story again, but this time focusing on her feelings about the events she described. 8/10. A seminal feminist work. It was later selected for the National Film Registry. [*Female Director*]

🍿

2 ABOUT PAINFUL MUSLIM TRAUMAS:

🍿 BROTHERHOOD is a very powerful Tunisian short that was nominated for the 2020 Oscars. A simple goatherd family in some remote area experiences painful upheavals when the older son return from Syria with a Burka-clad young wife. 9/10.

The young director, Meryam Joobeur, expanded this story into her latest 'Who do I belong to'. [*Female Director*]

🍿 LISTEN (2014) is a terrifying story of spousal abuse. In a small interrogation room at a Copenhagen police station, a burka-covered woman is begging for help . Her husband had beaten her severely and is now threatens to kill her. Her desperate appeal is repeated again and again but is completely misunderstood, since she only speaks Arabic. 9/10, if you can manage to watch it.

It was made in Danish and Arabic by two directors; One Zambian-Welsh, and the other Finnish-Iranian...

🍿

For the biggest Beatles fan that I was 60 years ago, and the Beatles completist that I've became since, the new Disney documentary BEATLES ‘64 doesn't offer much new. A few unseen clips on-stage and off, David Lynch goes off about the power of music, an editing decision to connect JFK idealism and death to the joy that The Beatles "brought back" on their first US tour. One thing that is painfully obvious from all that old footage: The media blitz that fueled their rise at that time was "SO" shallow, the interviews so inane, the TV and radios just unintelligent.

I hope that they improved since. /s

🍿

DIRECTED BY DANNY DEVITO X2:

🍿 Danny DeVito produced a bunch of movies (Erin Brockovich, Get Shorty, Gattaca), but he also directed 15 movies (including Hoffa, The war of the roses, Matilda, Throw momma from the train). The last one he finished, CURMUDGEONS, became the first ever Vimeo Stuff Pick in 2016. A wonderful surprise about a grumpy 80yo man in an assisted living facility. I had to see it twice in a row! Highly recommended! 8/10.

🍿 NEST OF VIPERS (2011) is another comedic gem with a twist, about old rich Tracey Walters on his death bed.

🍿

HOW THE GRINCH STOLE CHRISTMAS (the original 1966 television special). My first watch, and because this photo of Boris Karloff made me curious. Directed by Chuck Jones, and very close to Dr. Seuss original book. A radiant, unironically-gorgeous canvas. Another with 💯 score on Rotten Tomatoes.

🍿

MY FIRST 2 WITH FRENCH CLAUDE MILLER:

🍿 JULIET IN PARIS (1967) - A young student engages with a series of inexplicable and bizarre acts, including a mutilation of a kitten and drinking its blood. Godard-lite. 2/10.

🍿 In connection with the 100th anniversary of the Lumiere Brothers' first motion picture, 40 directors were each given the opportunity to shoot a 52 second film using the original hand-cranked Cinématographe camera. LUMIÈRE ET COMPAGNIE (1995) was the resulting gimmicky anthology, a curios, self-referential homage. The best usages of the limited format were 1. The recreation of the original 'Arrival of a Train at La Ciotat Station'. 2. A couple with Down Syndrome kiss. 3. Zhang Yimou's scene at the Great Wall of China. 4. A couple embrace to music, by Claude Lelouch. 5. An egg being fried by Abbas Kiarostami. 6. Spike Lee trying to get his baby daughter to say 'Daddy'. YMMV.

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THE MOST DANGEROUS GAME (1932) is HUNTING HUMANS! Sadistic count 'Zaroff' explains his perverted lust for killing humans as a prelude to having sex with their women. Very unusual and very much pre-code! With the same set-up and crew of the people who made King Kong a year later. 💯 score on Rotten Tomatoes. But only 2/10 from me.

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AGAIN?!?!? - "Again!!"- IAIN RANNOCH X 2:

🍿 "Does that cover cakes?"...

Everything I repeated 8-10 times already about my favorite 'Black Mirror' episode, HATED IN THE NATION, (last time in January), still stands. It's one of the best dystopian police procedural I know about people being held responsible for their actions. And the only sequel I ever want is the one where DSI Karin Parke and her sidekick Blue Coulson team up again to solve futuristic high-tech mysteries. And that ominous soundtrack note, man! 10/10.

(I re-watched it mostly for the details of the "Hashtag Seeding" twist, which I want to use myself in my next move...)

🍿 'Black Mirror' was built as a loosely-connected universe, where details from one episode are often referred to in another. F.ex. Blue Coulson is the one who cracked Iain Rannoch's 'Souvenir file', which was the reason for her resigning from forensic. And Iain Rannoch was the child murderer in S2E2 WHITE BEAR episode. This one I saw only once before, for a good reason, and I regret seeing again. It's a sadistic torture-porn, a nasty horror story about a woman who's being punished for an unspeakable act. Mean, distressful nightmare of the very type I don't care for. 1/10. Re-watch for both ♻️.

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A BUNCH OF SHORTS:

🍿 THEN COMES THE BODY tells of a Nigerian young man who taught himself how to dance ballet from watching YouTube tutorials and of the ballet school he started in the open-sewer slums of Lagos. It's the Instagram opposite of the Frederick Wiseman's Troisgros pure documentary style from above, but the subject matter is too powerful, so that the manipulation in this one is soon forgotten. You "will" cry! 7/10.

🍿 MILTON (1992) was the original sketch, part of Mike Judge's early, crude drawings which 7 years later he transformed into 'Office Space'. Every line in this short was used in the live-action version. 8/10.

🍿 COLOUR BOX (1935), a lovely abstract British experimental film, which the Nazi labeled 'degenerate'. Excellent Cuban music score.

🍿 WHO ARE YOU? (2019) by Chilean Julio Pot is a great little animation about a novelist with a writer block. Made in a delightful 'New Yorker' Cartoon style in black with red accents, but unfortunately it was dubbed into English, by voice actors that didn't match the story.

🍿 LIFT (2001) was a semi-pointless British documentary. The director installed himself in a narrow elevator of a typical tower block, and for a long period of time tried to engage in conversation with the ordinary folks who use it. A good concept, but it never got beyond random small talk.

🍿 HI-FI (2000), an early, wordless Sean Baker mood piece. 4 teens ride a sedan through New York at night, looking to score some hard drugs. M'eh.

🍿 MADAME TUTLI-PUTLI (2007), a weird Canadian Oscar-nominated stop motion puppetry nightmare. A creepy-looking 1920's flapper girl on a metaphysical night train is running away from something into unexplainable dreams.

🍿 Jack Stauber's 2020 OPAL, an even weirder, more unsettling mishmash of horrifying trops, done in an ugly, off-putting aesthetics. Low-rent Eraserhead.

🍿 FOUR WOMEN (1975), my first by Julie Dash. A choreographed modern dance interpenetrating the Nina Simon song. [*Female Director*]

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THROW-BACK TO THE ADORA ART PROJECT:  

Adora loves to cook.

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(ALL MY FILM REVIEWS - HERE).

[pumpkinpie59]

Irma: Oh April, I think it would be so romantic to kiss a guy and find he has a certain taste to his lips <3

Lotus, overhearing: Leonardo tastes like coconut flakes and tomato sauce …

Irma and April: O_o