#legitimately this is actually very good and serious but also *thinks back to the plot of the first book*

[chaotictempleknight]

Some advice for writers

I would like to offer some advice to my fellow writers. Caution: this post is a bit on the longer side.

If you have any type of series on the internet, please have a master post for that series, or at least some form of organization. No, I am not going to go endlessly scrolling through your blog or website to find the first chapter/page.

Please have links to chapters if you are writing a digital novel/novella. It makes it easier for the reader to get through the story. This is assuming you're not using a website dedicated to literature.

Tag your work with what genre it is. I see a lot of stories and chapters on the internet that don't do that or only tag one genre. I would like to know what genre your story is as I have preferences for what I read.

When writing a synopsis or a pitch, please establish the stakes. Tell me what the conflict is and why I should read. What are the consequences if the protagonist fails? Also don't describe what your story is. I'll find that out as I read.

Plan your story out before you write it. You are not that 1 in a million who's going to be able to write a story as you go along. PLAN OUT YOUR STORY BEFORE YOU START IT. Here's my advice: Establish your plot and ending, write the plot, write your characters, then write an outline for the story. Make sure you're happy with it, iron out any last minute details, then write a rough draft.

Have multiple drafts and don't post the first thing that comes out of your head. Don't worry if you mess up during the rough drafts, you can fix it later. How many drafts you have is up to you, just don't get carried away with them as you'll never finish the story.

The protagonist must succeed. It doesn't matter what they succeed in, they must succeed in something. There's no two ways about it. The protagonist can be anyone, be it a hero or villain. protagonist versus antagonist is not good versus evil, it's a clash of egos and ideals. It doesn't matter who they come from.

Write an evil villain and a strong hero. Let your villain be evil and let your hero be heroic. This is storytelling 101, but so many stories these days try to make everyone morally gray and indistinguishable from each other. You can have sympathetic villains and questionable heroes, just make it clear where the lines between good and evil are drawn.

Stop trying to be relatable and POST SOMETHING. I don't care about how many WIPs you haven't finished or about how your cat keeps interrupting you. Post your story. If you're more concerned about being relatable than actually writing, you're not a writer.

If you're expecting overnight success, you are in for a very rude awakening. No, you will not have overnight success. AND NO, you are not that 1 in a million. It takes time, effort, and dedication for your work to get noticed. I should know: have you heard of ULTRAMagic Alternate? I didn't think so.

If you are writing to make money and become famous, get out. I'm serious, leave. If you just want to make money, go get a regular job. You are legitimately getting in the way of actual writers who actually have a story to tell.

Having beta readers is ideal for improving your story. Find people interested in the genres you're writing and see what they think. You can always go back and fix the story if there is something wrong with it.

This one is for readers: If an author asks you to be a beta reader, they are NOT asking you to edit their story (although you can if you want to). You don't have to be an author, the writer is looking for your perspective as an average Joe off the street. Tell them what you think of the work, even if you have no knowledge of writing.

DO NOT USE AI IMAGES. The instant I see an AI image attached to your post I'm immediately scrolling past it. Either learn how to draw or hire a real artist.

DO NOT USE AI WRITING. I will ignore your entire existence if I catch you copy and pasting stuff from an AI chat bot. I'm okay with asking a chat bot for assistance as long as what is written on the page came from your head and human hands, however. Also newsflash, if AI becomes truly sentient, you are stealing ideas and work from another individual. Let that sink in.

[crossgartered]

LMAO WE KNOW, BREQ

[daisynik7]

[M4F] Husband Catches You Listening to Audio P*rn, Teaches You a Lesson [Soft Mdom] [Established Relationship] [Mild Degradation] [Praise] [Overstimulation] [Multiple Orgasms] [Creampie]

Pairing: husband!Nanami x f!reader

Word Count: ~2.6k

cw: established relationship, p*rn no plot, smut – PIV sex (cowgirl), sex toys, mutual masturbation, fingering, cunnilingus, sex without a condom, creampie, overstimulation, soft dom!Nanami, breeding kink, mild degradation (use of slut and whore), praise, overstimulation, multiple orgasms, pet names (honey, sweetie, sweetheart, princess, baby)

Summary: Nanami comes home early from his business trip and catches you doing something naughty in your bedroom. Author’s Note: Inspired by all the audio porn VAs that I listen to! Special shoutout to @mrsackermannx for raving about AugustInTheWinter with me. If you have not listened to him yet, PLEASE check him out, he’s incredible. Also, I’m clearly very delulu for Nanami currently, considering this is the third piece I’ve written for him within a week, but hey, this is my outlet! So I hope you enjoy! MDNI divider created by @/cafekitsune. Likes, reblogs, and/or comments are always appreciated, thank you for reading!

Your skin is sweltering against the sheets, sweat damp on your forehead and neck. Thighs are apart, vibrator buzzing on your clit, sleek with lube and arousal. You’re home alone; Nanami doesn’t return until tomorrow morning. Still, the thought of the audio porn playing on speaker makes you shy, so you have both earbuds in, listening to the sultry tones of your favorite voice actor moaning expletives directly into your ear. Such a good girl, oh fuck. You feel so good, sweetheart. Take that cock for me. You are so fucking tight, holy shit. The added sound effects of thwapping and wet squelches in the background immerse you into a state of erotic bliss, gushing for the second time tonight from the sensation of the toy pulsing on your throbbing bud.

“What do we have here?”

You jolt up when you hear your husband’s voice from the doorway, startled to see him standing there, leaning against the frame with a serious look on his face. His spectacles are on, covering his eyes, which you can tell are boring into you in this lewd position. 

Popping your headphones off, you hide the vibrator under the pillow, as if he hasn’t already caught you red-handed. Closing your legs, you bat your eyelashes, feigning an innocent expression. “Honey! What are you doing here?” More heat rushes into your cheeks, scorching hot from your recent orgasm and current embarrassment.  

He steps forward, sitting at the far edge of the bed, avoiding your gaze by staring at the floor, acting disappointed. “I managed to catch an earlier flight. Wanted to surprise you.” Dramatic, he turns to face you, eyes narrowed through his tinted lenses. “It appears that I am the one being surprised.” 

Biting your lip to hold back your laughter, you crawl towards him, naked from the waist down, your panties discarded on the floor near his feet. He’s not actually upset; having been together long enough and in tune with each other’s emotions, you can tell that he isn’t seriously mad at you. This is a role he indulges in occasionally: stoic, strict husband with a mean streak when things don’t go his way. And you know exactly where this will lead to, so naturally, you play along. “I’m sorry, sweetie. I didn’t think you would be coming home tonight. I just thought I’d have a little bit of fun.” You massage his shoulders, nuzzling your face to his nape, giving him a loud smooch. 

He shifts around in the bed, confronting you. “What were you listening to?” There’s legitimate curiosity in his voice, and now genuine guilt builds in your chest upon his question. 

You swallow hard, anxious to admit the truth, too ashamed to lie to him. “Um, I was listening to porn. Audio porn.”

He raises a brow at you, confused. Then, he says, “Let me hear it.”

Reluctantly, you reach for your phone on the nightstand, resuming from where you paused. Wet slaps blare through the speaker, then a man’s voice, moaning, “Ah fuck, let me hear you. Let me hear you moan on my cock. Let me hear you take this cock. Yeah, like that baby, take it just like that.” 

You bury your head in your hands, absolutely mortified as the pornographic dialogue continues. The audio comes to a halt when Nanami stops it, silently tapping at the screen. You’re still hiding in disgrace, squeezing your legs together tightly to conceal the evidence of your supposed sin. The tension is palpable, with neither of you speaking or making any sudden movements. You’re dying to know what he’s thinking, simultaneously terrified of his judgement. 

He clears his throat; you peek through your fingers to catch him loosening his tie around his collar, removing the glasses from his face. He’s blushing, brows tight with contemplation. “Did you come to this?” he asks, almost breathless. 

You lower your hands, fisting them into the sheets beneath you, nodding. Anticipating. 

“Show me,” he demands, eyes at your lap. Too eagerly do you spread your legs, displaying your sopping cunt to him, staring at his lips part slightly, a barely audible growl resounding within his throat. Your uneasiness gradually slips into arousal, aching to be touched, even punished, by your formidable husband. He bows, licking his mouth, inspecting you like prey he’s about to devour. Flicking his eyes to yours, he mutters, “You’re a dirty slut for listening to this filth. Have you no shame?” He kneels before you, unbuttoning his dress shirt, exposing the white tee underneath. Chiseled chest and abs carved into the fabric like fucking marble. 

Losing composure, you blurt out, “No shame, absolutely none. I’m fucking filthy.” Your pussy aches, toes clenched, thrilled. 

“I can’t stand you listening to another man’s voice while you get off. It makes me sick thinking about it. Makes my blood fucking boil.” His tone is menacing in way that titillates every inch of your skin, has you shuddering from the low growl at the end of each sentence. 

“Are you going to punish me?” you goad, saliva collecting on your tongue, heavy with lust.

“I can think of something better.” Reaching for your phone, he navigates through it, finding your voice recorder app. He taps on the big red button, setting it beside you. “From now on, you only come to my voice. Got it?”

You swallow hard, almost chocking on your spit when you respond, “Yes. Yes, baby.”

He grins, a wicked gleam in his eyes as he cups your cheek tenderly. “Good girl.” His thumb traces the outline of your parted lips, your mouth inviting him in. But he doesn’t, leaning back on his wrists, observing you with the obvious bulge protruding from his slacks. “Get that vibrator. Show me how you do it.”

Obeying, you search for it under the pillow, retrieving it to rub the tip up and down your folds, finger on the trigger. “There you go,” he encourages, a cocky smirk on his face, slowly unbuckling the belt around his waist, sliding it from the loops and tossing it aside. “Tease it a little before you turn it on. Make sure it’s exactly where you want it.” 

You tap the toy on your swollen bud, already sensitive from your earlier climax. You meet his gaze, waiting for a signal. He slides out of his pants and briefs, revealing his erection sprung against his belly. Before he does anything else, he grabs your phone and sets it on the bed between you. Palming his length, he grins. “Go ahead.” 

What a fucking menace he can be.

Pushing the button, the vibrator immediately pulsates on you, causing you to twitch from the intense sensation. He watches, fingers wrapped around his shaft, stroking himself, thumb grazing the slit. “Look at you. My gorgeous girl,” he purrs. “My perfect angel with the prettiest pussy. Can’t wait to stretch you open with this cock. Bury myself deep inside you. Fill you up with my cum.”

“Fuck, Kento,” you whimper, pressing the fluttering tip firmer, sweat beginning to bead on your forehead. You’ve always loved his hands; how pristine they are with his knuckles tight on his skin. Large, strong, then rough on the pads of his fingers from hard work and constant use. They’re even prettier in a fist surrounding his cock, wrist jerking hastily, precum glistening at the tip. Your entire focus is on him touching himself while he watches you do the same, the toy’s low hum enhanced when it’s snugly nestled to your clit. 

“You like it when I talk nasty to you, huh?” he huffs, readjusting himself nearer to you. He’s so close, you can practically feel the tip of his cock at your quivering pussy. “Is it better than listening to your ridiculous pornography?”

“Yes, yes, yes,” you whine, jutting your hips out, attempting to close the gap. 

“Unlike them, I can actually touch you,” he muses, his tip teasing your entrance. “I can do whatever I want, whatever you want. They don’t get to fuck this sweet cunt like I get to. They don’t get to taste you the way I do.” 

Suddenly, he grabs the vibrator from your grasp, shutting it off and setting it back under the pillow. He shifts down the bed, positioning his head between your thighs, diving in tongue first onto your puffy clit. Pleasure resonates from your core throughout your limbs, legs shaky and mind hazy as he slobbers all over you, covering your bud in his frothy spit. It’s sloppy, salacious, straight up nasty. After only a few strokes of his tongue, it’s already enough to send you into your third orgasm of the night, more powerful than the first two combined when you were alone. 

You’d be a fool to expect him to let up after coming once with him; still, it shocks you when he doesn’t stop. He latches to you harder, suckling on your sensitive clit until it’s plump between his glossy lips and you’re crying out, “Too much!” overstimulated and spasming above him. Sometimes, when he’s in one of these moods, he forgets his own virility, always so keen on making you orgasm multiple times in one go. Tonight, he forgets that you had already been prepping yourself since earlier. With a gentle kiss, he relents, indulging in his work by running his tongue along your gushing pussy, drinking up your cum. He reaches for his cock, stiff between his stomach and the bedsheets under him. On his knees, he returns to his spot from earlier, stroking his cock with the tip just barely in your entrance. 

You’re absolutely spent, but you yearn for him inside you, desperate to be filled with his load. “Come in me, baby,” you beg, gripping his wrist to pull him closer. “Fuck me.” 

He lets out a disapproving tsk, shaking his head. “Not yet, princess. You have to be patient. We’re just getting started,” he smirks, stroking himself faster. “Are you just so fucking needy for my cum?” You nod erratically, tempted to thrust yourself onto him. 

“Then beg for it,” he orders, sliding his cock the slightest bit further inside you. “Convince me that you deserve it.”

Understanding what he wants, you retrieve your little toy again, rubbing small circles with it on your bud, smearing whatever is left of your orgasm around it. “Please, Kento. Please. I need it. I need it.”

The sight of you like this has him dangling on the very edge, so close to climax. “Turn it on,” he demands. You do, the buzz electrifying all the nerves in your body yet again. You chant his name over and over until he shoots insides you, spurts of opaque cum flooding your pussy. “Yes, yes. Good girl. Take that fucking cum. Take all of it. Fuck.” His voice is hushed, breathy and trembling from the high. 

You stop the vibrator, tossing it to the floor carelessly. Nanami crawls next to you, cradling you in his arms. With a kiss to your forehead, he whispers, “Are you okay?” 

You smile, turning to face him, nuzzling his chest. “Of course.”

He caresses your face, trailing down your body to rest his hand at your waist. He glances at your phone beside you. “We’re still recording, you know.”

You giggle. “And…?”

He kisses you softly, tongue flitting past your lips, guiding you flat on your back, spreading your legs apart. “I’m not done with you yet.” His hand glides to your loins, toying with your swollen clit before teasing your entrance, brimming with his creampie. “Can you still take it, sweetheart?”

You nod, breath hitching, cuddling closer to him. Smiling sweetly at you, he eases a finger in, cum overflowing your pussy and trickling out from your slit. He slides in another easily, stretching you open, a whine escaping you. His mouth is hot on your ear. “You love this, don’t you? Me finger fucking my cum deeper inside you. Taking it like an obedient whore.” He picks up the pace, your cunt clenching his digits. “I’m going to get you pregnant tonight. Breed you, make you mine. You want that, sweetie?” His fingers writhe inside you, hitting that sweet spot repeatedly until you’re tight around him, ready for another orgasm. At this point, you’ve stopped keeping count, lost in a sex-fueled craze instigated by your husband. 

“Yes, Kento. Give it to me. I want it. I want it so bad.” You notice he’s hard again, his erection stiffening against your leg. Reaching for him, you rub your hand on his length, feeling it twitch from your touch.

“Fuck,” he groans, pulling out from you. He sits up, back to the headboard, beckoning. “Get on my lap. Hurry,” he urges, hoisting you towards him. You straddle him, guiding his cock to your entrance. “Sink down on it. There we go,” he instructs, eyes wide, desperation etched in his tone. He needs this just as much as you do, and it drives you wild. You follow his command, lowering yourself onto him, his dick sliding in smoothly, bottoming out. “That’s my good girl. Fuck. You’re so good to me. So fucking good to me.”

You start riding him the way he likes, your ass slapping loudly on his thighs. He’s moaning endlessly, throwing in the occasional fuck and pet name as he grips your hips, bouncing you on his cock. You wrap your arms around his neck to keep steady, holding him tightly. “Want your cum,” you manage to utter, enraptured in the scorching pleasure he surrounds you in. 

He's fucking up into you, feet planted at the end of the bed. The mattress creaks with every thrust of his cock. In a huffy breath, he says, “Milk it out of me, honey. Milk me fucking dry. You can do it sweetheart; I know you can.” The praise encourages you to ride him faster, rougher, your bodies in tandem, springing on the bed, moaning into each other’s mouth with a passionate kiss. 

Soon, he pulsates inside you, stuffing you even fuller with his cum. You climax once more, gripping his cock with your fluttering pussy. He cradles you in a cozy embrace, catching his breath, nuzzling his nose to your chest. You giggle, running you fingers through his hair, smooching the top of his head. “You okay?” you ask, wiping the perspiration from his forehead.

He nods, exhaling deeply. “Just let me hold you. Need to calm down.”

You laugh, amused by his current state of post-coital euphoria. Fetching the phone teetering precariously at the edge of the bed now, you tap on the red button to stop the recording. Seeing this, he mentions, “You know I don’t actually mind you listening to that kind of stuff, right?” 

You smile, noticing the guilt in his voice, massaging his back. “I know, honey. I know you don’t.”

He squeezes you, taking a deep breath. “Okay, good. Just want to make that clear.”

You cup his cheek, thumb caressing the stress lines along his face, gradually relaxing to your touch. “If it makes you feel any better, I’d much rather listen to this than some stranger on the Internet.”

Chuckling, he replies. “Maybe it makes me feel a little bit better.” He snuggles closer to you, hugging you tight, reluctant to let you go. Eventually, the two of you slip beneath the covers, getting comfortable with Nanami spooning you from behind.  

You glance at the screen, showing the several minute long recording and the play button adjacent to it, ready to be tapped. “So,” you start, craning your neck to smirk at him. “Should we give it a listen?”

He returns your grin, shifting beside you, cock growing hard between your ass cheeks. “Absolutely.”

[retro-stars]

What. What if Voltron legendary defender and Rottmnt crossover?

Listen, I have a vision: A younger Lance ran into Leo April-style and he as the reason why Leo originally started learning Spanish

He makes good friends with the turtles and co, acting as something of a fun cousin since he's not in New York consistently and absolutely refuses any Donnie upgrades to his tech when he goes off to the Garrison about a month before the season one plot gets rolling since he wants to be an awesome pilot the fair way or something like that

They talk constantly over message and call, giving updates back and forth. They even manage some in person meet-ups for a while once Leo got the hang of consistent long-distance teleportation before Lance ended up in space

Hunk knows them fairly well (the consequences of being a childhood friend of one Lance McClain, you end up knowing a lot of random people through the weirdest circumstances), but they've only met really online or over the phone with the exception of April He's taken to exchanging recipes with Mikey and talking engineering and biochem with Donnie and giving Leo advice. His default talking buddy is Raph through and through though

Pidge didn't get a chance to meet them but she does hear of them, so they're unaware of the whole mutant thing and also that the fellow rogue hacker she sometimes finds digging through the Garrison databases and the super-smart-and-obnoxious-about-it Donnie she reminds Lance of are in fact the same person. Donnie doesn't tell Lance that he's pretty sure Pidge is in fact one teenaged Katie Holt tricking the entirety of the US military and government because he thinks it's funny and wants to see how long it takes Lance to notice the literal fucking soap opera going on around him. Lance has some suspicions as to how legitimate Pidge's identity is anyway since Donnie is horrid at hiding how he's a little too curious about her, though he never gets a confirmation up until Pidge actually tells the team

AS FOR THE ACTUAL PLOT:

The Garrison Trio's disappearance happens literally like. right before the events of the movie. The timing of those two things just generally ended up really unfortunate, 'cause Lance got into the fighter pilot course and started dealing with some serious issues with his self-esteem and peers as well as the additional stress of the bigger workload right as the team dynamics with turtles started getting really bad

And when he disappeared they didn't get a chance to act on their suspicions due to the whole Kraang situation and after that it was mostly rebuilding and recovery and just hoping and praying Lance returned at some point because all of them were too scared of asking Casey jr. about his future for fear of the answer

Meanwhile Lance is dramatizing his reactions to the whole space thing despite it honestly not being that much of a shift to his worldview after the whole "oh yeah there's magic and a whole bunch of different races living underneath New York that all share the common trait that they lowkey hate/fear humans" thing The whole Galra Keith thing comes out and Lance is just chilling and waiting to ask if he can get tested for anything off with his DNA too since he's not entirely sure how mystic energy works and if it can rub off on someone or like. unlock some secret abilities or something so at this point it's better safe than sorry

When they come back to Earth the first words out of Lance's mouth are just the dawning horror of "I'm gonna die, aren't I?" because he knows that Donnie has been digging around the Garrison classified files since he applied to the academy and there is no way he hasn't broken in and seen the video/warning they sent to Earth already and he is most definitely going to be absolutely pissed Lance didn't at least try and send them a message letting them know he was alive at the very least

The team is just staring in confusion as Lance's face slowly goes through the five stages of grief before settling on the expression of a man facing his execution. Except for Hunk. Hunk took a second but as soon as he got it he was full belly laughing as Lance's expense (or at least until Lance reminds him that they're gonna kill him too since he didn't contact them either. Then he's just scared.)

[mermaidsirennikita]

ARC REVIEW: A Fate Inked in Blood by Danielle L. Jensen

4.5/5. Releases 2/27/24.

Heat Index: 6.5/10.

Vibes: vIKINGS!!!!, slutty guy/serious girl, "oops I'm married to your dad", and legitimately intense battle and magic stuff that actually works and puts people in those heartrending situations where it's all "STAY ALIVE!!!!! I WILL FIND YOU!!!!!!!!!" as it should in a FANTASY ROMANCE

Married to a man she hates and hiding the fact that she's the child of a minor goddess (children of gods are a Thing in this world) Freya lives a life of drudgery. Until, that is, her secret is revealed to all and Jarl Snorri declares that she's a prophesied shieldmaiden, meant to clinch him the kingdom he's always wanted. As such, she must marry him--kind of an issue, as she is very, very attracted to Snorri's son Bjorn. Another issue: Bjorn has been bound to Freya as her protector. On top of everything, Freya's goddess-given abilities are obscure but dangerous, leading her to wonder if her fate is less that of a protector than that of a monster...

OOOOH WE'VE GOT SOMETHING HERE. I've read Danielle L. Jensen before, way back in the day with her Malediction books--but those were YA (albeit, pretty hot YA) and I really don't read YA anymore. However, I do like Viking Shit, and I especially liked the idea of a romance between a Viking lady and her husband's SON, which was something I always wanted to happen on Vikings. So I picked it up.

And dude. It sucked me right in. I am, as I will get into more below, kind of a hard sell on fantasy romance--when it works, I am HOOKED but when it doesn't I am quickly turned off. This is the former. I was so drawn to Freya, a heroine who does have Chosen One aspects, but is also very human and just trying to make it work, one battle at a time. (Also? She's not instantly gREAT at fighting, how refreshing.) And I absolutely fell head over heels dumb girl for our hero Bjorn, who I expected to be a stoic silent warrior type. NO. He's so much better. He's like, an amazing warrior--but is also so funny and super slutty and just a BRO. I love him. Protect him.

The fantasy plot is compelling and doesn't get so in love with itself that it's impossible to follow. It's really good! I'm excited by this! Can't wait for the next! (What a relief, God.)

Quick Takes:

Here's my issue with fantasy romance (or romantasy, though I'll point out that this series is billed as "fantasy romance" on Netgalley, and that is so HOT to me): often, though the name implies that it's a subgenre of romance with a heavy fantasy bent... It's basically fantasy (well-done or not) with a romance subplot tucked in. The character work is shoddy, the tension is nil, and you can tell that the author is just trying to horn in on the romance audience. Not so, here. 

First off, I think Jensen was really smart to create a fantasy world that is very "Vikings But Fantasy". It's not poorly drawn. You can tell that she's really into the Norse vibe, and I will say that I am biased because as someone who has somehow been watching the Vikings franchise since its inception (pray for me) I'm fairly familiar with it on that level. But the way she weaves the fantasy elements, most distinctly the idea of these empowered children of gods (who are basically made when their mortal parents HAVE THREESOMES WITH GODS??? Amazing. Just imagine having these superpowers and knowing that it's because your parents took some dude home from the bar one night and he turned out to be Thor.) into the story is really natural.

Secondly... There is a really compelling plot, yes. I am really into the duality of Freya, don't get me wrong. I really like the royal intrigue. All the WIFE DRAMA. It's My Brand. But the real heart of this story, very openly and honestly and presented without any self-consciousness, is Freya and Bjorn. And I think Jensen just lays it all out there the moment she introduces the brilliant plot device of "Bjorn's Dad, Who Freya Is Technically Married To, Wants Bjorn To Follow Freya Around And Make Sure She Doesn't Get Into Danger". Oh, so he's supposed to protect her as she hurtles into adventure and fights Viking zombies and shit? HOW CONVENIENT. Throughout the story, their immediate physical attraction melts into this emotional slow burn... and I am also a hard sell on a slow burn, so thank you for doing it right, Danielle. The book is single POV (Freya's, though I wouldn't mind Bjorn's in a future installment) but you can just tell that Bjorn is so mad that he's this into a woman who is technically his stepmother. Like, he can have anyone! But he wants HER. But he can't have her! 

Picture me gobbling this up like a raccoon in a trash can.

--Speaking of! If you're all "ew, I hate that Freya is married to his dad"--no spoilers, but this is dealt with in a way that I think both avoids the ick that some readers (to be clear: not me, I am very resistant to ick) may feel over that setup, and avoids a copout. 

At the same time... First off, Bjorn doesn't fully know that the ick has been avoided, and to be frank, I don't think Bjorn really cares about a little ick. But he does have like, you know, the "WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME" vibe for a while, and it is delicious. All very illicitaffairs.mp3.

--I also really loved that there is no mistake about Freya being a GROWN WOMAN. I strongly, strongly object to shelving this as New Adult, because regardless of her age, Freya (and honestly Bjorn as well) has been through a lot. She's literally married when we open this novel. She gets a second husband. She is not a virgin; her marriage was not chaste; it sucked. (To be clear: you don't get a lot of insight into Freya's first marriage beyond "it sucked" because it's dealt with pretty quickly. You don't see any sexual assault on the page in this book, and I don't know that Freya would see it that way? It's alluded to as "lie back and think of England" bad, gross sex, which I think suggests assault, but there is not any explicit violence, sexual or otherwise, depicted in either of her marriages.) She is JADED. She has never had a man like, take care of her.

And then she gets linked up with local dude who's snarking at her horrible husband about how he must not go down on her enough, and she's all "WHAT'S THAT MEAN :/". I really, really enjoy a pairing that involves a tough woman who's never been properly taken care of and a man who's like "I am DESPERATE to take care of you". Freya deserves!

--Another good choice: often, in fantasy romance (or at least in fantasy romance of yore; I feel like there has been a recent push to correct this, at least somewhat) the heroine is hypercompetent. She's smart, she's a good fighter, she's a femme fatale, she's the seventeen-year-old master assassin...

Freya is... a person. She does want to fight, and she is--not surprisingly, as she does come from a culture in which women do fight--not incapable of holding her own. Somewhat. But as soon as she's up against a master warrior like Bjorn, she's kind of not great, Bob, and even with the benefit of her goddess-given abilities, she still has a lot to learn. It's giving "Book One Aang", and I'm good with that. I'm actually much happier with her giving Book One Aang as a twenty-something woman because like? Give us hope, Freya.

She also doesn't have all the answers. Frankly, Freya doesn't have 80% of the answers, and she shouldn't, because she's new to this. She's new to the magic stuff (though she knew she had it, which I did like--she's not an Alina Starkov-level "WHAAAT" about it) and she's new to the court intrigue, and frankly she's new to Hot Dudes. Speaking of, she does spend a decent amount of brain time going "STOP! STOP, SELF! DO NOT LOOK! DO NOT TOUCH!" Which, frankly, I loved. I feel like that's the kind of behavior people are going to be annoying about because people are dying, but like. This woman just spent years surrounded by Village 2's and suddenly she's being swung around and guarded by a very flirtatious Royal 12. Give her a break. I would be much worse. 

And she doesn't know what the hell she's doing with this man. She knows the mechanics, but she doesn't know the FINESSE. Speaking of...

The Sex:

The reason why I'm between a 6 and a 7 on this (and that's not quality, that's literally just how hot the book is re: sex acts) is that the story is a slow burn. Everything sexy happens in the back half, and you don't get to the full shebang until pretty late in the game. It's ABOUT THE YEARNING.

However, I think this was a good choice, and when we do get those scenes they are super hot (and explicit, though not like Sierra Simone explicit to be clear) and passionate and you definitely get the sense that it's this giant deal for these two. I was quite touched. I was like "awww" but also "oh" which is where I want to be when a story builds to two people hooking up for that long.

And Jensen fully takes advantage of the "Vikings" component and does have some "under the sleeping furs with 76 people sleeping in the near vicinity but we just need to get this done" action here. Which. Brava.

I'll be honest--I was worried about this, as I feel like I've been let down by a great fantasy romance in the past. I, much like several people in this novel, have been burned before. Not so here. I'm fully on board. I loved where we left off, and I cannot wait to see where those two crazy kids go next. Hopefully, like. To Vikings divorce court. So she can end that marriage to his dad.

Thanks to Netgalley and Del Rey for providing me with a copy of this book. All thoughts and opinions are my own.

Preorder:

Amazon

B&N

Bookshop.org

[dateamonster]

longass monster high liveblog: season 2 edition lets gooooooo

rule school

very first thought of the new season: i want a doll of clawdeens wereruler armor so bad. also im excited for more worldbuilding lore stuff, and more varied werecreature designs! part of me gets a little irked sometimes that there seems to be disproportionate attention payed to werecreatures and the inner workings of their society over other monster species, but i cannot deny, i love a funny lil furry.

especially this side character bear dude who keeps showing up

rly feels like there should be a clause in were-society for what to do if ur wereruler is a fuckin kid. she should not have to be doing all this.

when she finally gets that armor off its gonna be like rock lee with the weights

i love these cunty old werewolf ladies ngl

damn speedreader clawdeen

that painting of foxford is soo cute clawdeen i loove u

toralei!! toralei HUG!!!!!!!! hug AND a pun!!! shes sososososo cute

oh and shes maaaad that she showed affection where other people can see lol the Dynamic.. it is unfolding before my very eyes..

oh damn the fox guy is a sneaky motherfucker? who could have foreseen this....... granted the whale plushie is unexpected

new witch in town

draculauras gay lil witch friend <333

lol is humans using monster slang a microaggression? much to think about.

im really interested in this developing plotline about draculaura being pressured to be like the model of Good Witchcraft. it works well with her established character and arc of like trying to live up to her fathers reputation and status in the monster world. poor girl never seems to be able to just fucking relax.

skelita! i love that shes trying out witchcraft, and the art-based magic is a fun angle too! i can totally see where this is going tho. drac is super serious about magic because theres all this pressure on her while skelita is just trying it out in a casual way so theyre at odds. its an interesting dilemma because i can def see both sides.

im really happy the writing seems like empathetic to both positions here. skelita deserves to try magic her way on her own terms, but its also totally understandable draculaura would feel protective over witchcraft when any misuse of it is ultimately going to reflect on her since she was the one working to legitimize it. respectability is a double edged sword fr!

play it again clawd

aw clawd is such a sweetiepie mamas boy. i def feel a little bad for him. imagine if ur little sister became the queen of ur entire society and ur just like. hangin out there.

oh were doing a groundhog day? im not a big timeloop plot person but ill try not to be too biased

this is also how me and my roommate act when theres a fly in the house

aw im rly glad they acknowledge that selena had like a whole life in beheme that she had to leave behind when she came home.. idk if theyre planning to actually do anything more substantial with that but yea when you think about its kinda fucked up! they probably had friends and stuff! clawd was *born* there! i get why theyd choose to stay here with their family and all even if they could easily go back, but like, its gotta be sad at times!

ok not bad as a timeloop ep goes. still not my fav but like clawds so cute and its so nice seeing him do stuff with his family <3

thats all for tonight i think! see u next time!!

[wibble-wobbegong]

The end of the year is near! Give a shoutout to your favorite blogs and tag them to spread positivity before the year ends! (from: a secret anon)

FUCK YEAH!!!!

okay my favorite theory/analysis blogs

@aemiron-main - actually i hate him. im lying. all he does is cause me unimaginable pain and suffering. no but genuinely a genius theorist and has eyes like a hawk!! he does a fantastic job at thoroughly combing the show and finding the littlest details that don’t make sense in order to build a bigger picture and i eat it up every time! love him even though i think he’s goading me to kill myself whenever he reblogs one of my posts and the tags start with “wibble what if i told you”

@bugsbenefit - my absolute favorite blog to read about narrative analysis from!!! they do an amazing job explaining oddities from a narrative position as well as identifying ways certain theories are either supported by or don’t work with the way the narrative needs to flow in S5. she’s also super skilled at keeping my attention throughout a post with the way she writes

@bylerschmyler - love this guy because they’re not afraid to point out the flaws of something and create counter arguments but they also aren’t doing that stuff to discredit a theory but rather challenge its strength!! like they won’t press on if the original theory can go against the counter points they make. PLUS they create incredible theories of their own!!! the mike is the 4th victim stuff is really good

@finalgirlbyers - idc if they consider themself an analysis blog or not because I do. they regularly have fantastic takes and explain things in a quick and easy to understand way. she genuinely has a great grasp on the show but she’s also very open minded which is always so nice to see!! like if you’re looking for short, sweet, banger posts that hit the nail on the head i am pointing at their blog

@heroesbyler - ok. stav is the only person whose analysis i have legitimately cried over. the approach she takes to covering the very serious and dark topics of stranger things is something i really appreciate because she doesn’t curve the pure horror of some of the stuff going on. if you really wanna feel just how horrific the gay horror show is i’d recommend reading some of stav’s analysis because she NAILS it and does not mask just how fucked up it can get.

@laozuspo - james always has some incredibly niche but great insight to the show!! theory wise, i’m always amazed by how intricate his research for a theory will get so when you read his posts it’s just evidence on top of evidence and it’s always really engaging and VERY interesting. radiationgate had me hooked for days because there was just SO much to explore regarding that topic and there were so many little details that just make so much sense!!!

@mlchaelwheeler - MY SISTER IN MICHAEL DEFENSE!!! one of the original mike defenders and someone who i trust to accurately talk about mike’s character, which is saying a lot because i’m Me. ALSO she kick started so many great conversations!! iirc, she was the one who made the original theory about henry having been the one who kidnapped will, not the demogorgon way back in like. June. she’s been on it longer than any of us

favorite authors :)

@andiwriteordie - ok SO i have to tell you guys that this shit??? my life hasn’t been the same since i first read this. i know it’s an older one but it’s in my top three fics of all time i legitimately adore it!! pure jet fuel for that last week before V2 dropped and honestly part of me still really wants that final scene to happen in S5 ngl. like it kills me every time i read it but it’s just so GOOD

@astrobei - oh suni, how i her love writing. always a GREAT time when you’re reading an astrobei fic, and i think my favorite is still this one!! it’s just got such a fun vibe and the characterization is immaculate and the plot is really intriguing! it’s one of those fics where you can’t stop reading even though it’s like half the length of an entire novel. sometimes sleep is worth the sacrifice and this fic is one of them

@blueeandyellowmakesgreen - top ten reasons to kill myself; this ficlet. jade i absolutely love you but this??? fuck you for making me go through that not once but TWICE. i felt that shit in my SOUL and it HURT. it hurt SO BAD. writing so good it makes you immobile for 6.5 hours because you can’t stop replaying the image in your head 🖕🖕 (<3)

@/byeler - ok not actually @-ing this person because we’ve never interacted and i’m not about to make a fool of myself by being a little fanboy loser BUT. absolutely incredible writing. reading this had me so fucking sucked in dude, like i was reading and reading and i couldn’t believe time had passed at all. pure romance can be hard for me to steam roll through sometimes but i genuinely forgot that I was a Person while reading that

@elekinetic - ummmmmm hello??? script writer of all time? you’re not just reading it, you’re not just watching it, you’re being transported inside the show with the way she writes. every single character is on point and she maintains the atmosphere of the show itself BEAUTIFULLY!!! my favorite script thus far is probably the one where eddie gets shot, though it doesn’t seem like it’s up anymore. the ending has me gasping out loud because i saw it happening in real time in front of my eyes

@smoosnoom - MOON!!!! OHHHHH MY GOD i can’t even recommend one specific thing because every fic is just soooooo giggles twirls my hair. i am the number one smoosnoom fanboy. i fucking eat that shit up!!! like, whenever it’s time to read a smoosnoom fic I don’t just open the fic i KNOW i’m not moving till i’m done so i get some snacks and get really comfy and then i dive in and don’t move till i’m finished. every fic absolutely slays i cannot recommend every single fic enough

favorite editors!!!

@strangersynth - do i really have to say anything?? it’s time. like no shit he’s one of the best editors around and i think everyone knows that at this point. THE editor!! absolutely obsessed with every video. i really like the way she takes clips that aren’t really character clips but just stuff you wouldn’t even really think of or remember to build the tone of the video and it always comes together so well!!! like it’s the small details that he nails and that make the videos so incredibly delicious

@/thatgaymood - ok they just made a lot of funny edits + they’re really good at adjusting audio/visuals to make the character say and do shit that definitely didn’t happen but it’s really really well done so it’s just. I don’t know how to explain it. i was gonna find one of the more popular audios but i was scrolling their blog and found this and it made me kick my feet a little cause like. idk watch it and you’ll understand

favorite artists

@blueeandyellowmakesgreen - and she’s back! art that is so scrumptious and delicious and like. It’s like spaghetti kinda ! anyway here’s my favorite piece from jade and i will never shut up about it ever because everything about it is just sooooooo chomping biting chewing slurping devouring

@bujomoss - Hsbebbdbva bc d bujomoss is fucking!!!!! i love the way they draw mike like i love it so bad it’s not even funny. everything they make is so so good and my current favorite is this piece they did but it changes like twice a day bc bujo never does anything that isn’t one of the best things I’ve ever seen with my own two eyeballs

@gmaybe666 - BARKING BITING OH MY GOD. ok just so everybody is aware i am the biggest gmaybe fan around. legitimately i am such a fan i could gush about every single piece they do for days on end. it’s just SO good and it’s an art style i cannot get enough of. i have to scroll through their art regularly or i’ll start combusting it’s like air to me!! if i could link every drawing i simply Would but for now go give this piece some love please please please

@new-ronantics - OHHHHH MY DEAREST EEVIE!!! <33 art that is just so pleasing to look at. like it’s like biting into the most satisfying meal you’ve ever had!! amazing texture but not in the art way like if i bit into it i think it would have the texture of something i cannot even imagine but i know it would be the greatest of all time. incredibly bitable art i wish it were real food so bad. top ten bitable images

@nnilkyway - BITES HIM. ummmm ok so im definitely totally 100% normal about his art! yeah no it’s not like i turn into a wild rabid beast whenever a new nnilkyway piece is finished no definitely not bc i’m just So Normal about it. this means a normal amount to me because i am So-

@/taeiris go to her fucking blog. not elaborating. fucking do it before I Find You.

and the non-st blog boys 💪

@ed89 - edward my funny silly guy 👊😼 it’s been a minute but he’s hilarious and his time in the st fandom will never be forgotten. also if he sees this hi ed guess who hit his first bong two days ago :)

@ronaldreaganoffical - me and ronald reagan have a bromance i don’t expect any of you to understand. they’re from way before i even joined the st fandom when i was hardly even a blog, so actually they’re one of my most treasured mutuals even though we’re no longer in the same fandoms. love you bro <3

[waitingforeddyneddy]

I have been reading your asks for the last half hour and I am thoroughly confused by your page. I'm not sure how far I would need to go back for most of it to make sense, but I digress. I wanted to address the claim that Fellow Travelers is an 'anti-communist propaganda' show. I'm curious as to how much you actually know about the red scare and McCarthyism, both historically and how those events are currently perceived.

You would be hard pressed to find a serious scholar who wouldn't refer to that moment in time as a cautionary tale—a blip in history that America would be doomed to repeat. Indeed, the show (the one episode I have to go on so far, and the synopsis of the book) doesn't paint McCarthyism in a positive light at all. McCarthyism being, for all intents and purposes, weaponized anti-communist propaganda. In the show, Tim is a professed anti-communist. This is true. He is also a young man living in 1950's America, who was, like all Americans, heavily scarred by WWII. To say that men like Tim weren't the norm in that era, and thus an irrelevant character for this period piece, would be ludicrous. You simply cannot make a true to life period piece about the 1950s without a general anti-communist sentiment. It's not propaganda. It's just the truth of the time. I might be wrong, but my hunch is that you are against (what you perceive as) anti-communist propaganda because you have a modern day idea of what communism is. I would argue that modern ideas of communism are VERY different from what communism actually produced in the 30s and 40s—a genocide of any and everyone that wasn't Anglo-Saxon, able bodied, opposite-sex attracted, and Christian. The character Tim would have had every cause to fear that type of rule, being a gay man. If the show accurately portrays that, it's warranted.

That is a lot to unpack. But I think if you are going to accuse this series of being 'anti-communist propaganda' then you need to provide receipts. And your earlier claim that (I'm paraphrasing) "Jewish people had a part in it's production, and the author used to be a Republican," is not good enough. You sound anti-sematic and ignorant to the general changes that happened in the Republican party that caused Thomas Mallon to leave it. You also need to explain why anti-communist propaganda is a bad thing.

Anti communist propaganda is bad thing for me cause I am a commie, I don’t have to explain myself to you on this and I’m going to ignore what you said to about what communism did in the 30’s and 40’s

If you have been reading my asks for so long than you have certainly read that the plot of the book/show is not even that relevant as of why people should boycott it in my opininion

Antizionism and antisemitism are two different things so don’t accuse me of being antisemitic. Israel is not a legitimate state and is currently committing genocide.

All I said is that people should not contribute economically to the success of a show made and acted by people who said “there is no Palestine”or something like that. All I said is that fans of the actors should consider 🏴‍☠️ and many of them are fortunately

[evilisk]

Animated Things I Watched In 2022, Part 2

I (try to) describe the animated shows I watched in a sentence, but this time for stuff I watched in late 2022

= = =

Inside Job Season 2 (2022)

This season did not go in the direction I thought it was heading, I expected Reagan’s relationship to go in a completely different direction due to the obvious contrast between Reagan’s own parents. What we got was much more bittersweet...

Favorite Episode: “Brettwork”

Hilda Season 1 and 2 (2018 - 2020)

Dunno what else to say than “it’s good” and “watch if you haven’t already”

Favorite Episode: “The Deerfox”

Extra Note: I may have teared up (just a little) because of the above episode

Harley Quinn Season 3 (2022)

Same comment for this show, except I also have to say “thank god this series has survived the purge over at Warner-Discovery”

Favorite Episode: “There’s No Ivy In Team”

The Owl House Season 2 (2022)

Same comment for this show AGAIN, except I have to say “of course Disney execs are coming into ruin a good thing yet again”

Favorite Episode: “King’s Tide”

X-Men (1992-1997)

The artstyle has aged like milk and I wouldn’t call the show “good for its time” when Gargoyles and Batman: The Animated Series are from the same period... but I admit, the show has some high highs, even if it also has some very low lows, and generally isn’t consistent as the those other two shows

Favorite Episode: “Beauty & the Beast”

Extra Note: If voice actor for Fabian Cortez wasn’t so awful, I probably would have put the “Sanctuary” 2-parter as my favorite one in the series.

Niko and the Sword of Light Season 1 (2017)

This show is perfectly fine, it has a good voice cast and a classic setup, I just wasn’t the target audience for this show

Favorite Episode: “From the Sea of Suffering to the Faraway Shore”

Ultimate Spider-Man Season 1 (2012)

Maybe it gets better in the later seasons, but the first season is pretty rough.

The skits, which I didn’t mind, get annoying when they start undermining the serious episodes. You can also tell the writers didn’t want to give Spider-Man a team at all, because they barely explore Spider-Man’s teammates and it feels like they're always sidelined when the main plot is actually happening.

Favorite Episode: “Freaky” Least Favorite Episode: “Awesome”

Extra Note: Awesome is such a bad episode. Mr. “Great Responsibility” flunks on his science fair project and decides to steal technology from SHIELD to pass off as his project, EVEN THOUGH his principle is literally works for SHIELD and would probably notice stolen SHIELD tech if he saw it

Dead End: Paranormal Park Season 1 and 2 (2022)

It’s hard to call this show a “must watch” when I think all the legitimately good episodes are in the back-half of Season 2 and it’s not clear if there’ll even be a Season 3. I recommend checking out the first few episodes for yourself and seeing if the story and characters vibe with you

Favorite Episode: “My Super Sweet 1600″

Dogs in Space Season 1 and 2 (2021 - 2022)

It’s hard to describe what I don’t like about this show... it’s like this. The cast is very fun and funny in low stakes episodes. But when there are actual stakes, the cast (especially the main character, who is literally named “Garbage”) becomes very frustrating to watch. And the problem is that the writers keep trying to do story heavy episodes instead of sticking to their lane (sorry if this sounds mean but I really preferred the self-contained stuff over the main plot).

I don’t want to completely disregard this show: it’s mostly unknown and it’s not actively terrible. I actually had a lot of fun with Season 1 but I wouldn’t bother with Season 2 since it writes off the best character (Kira) and has a very unsatisfying conclusion.

Favorite Episode: “Paws & Rewind”

I really wish the writing for this show was as good as its animation

[kinetic-elaboration]

May 14: The Expanse 1x10 (!!!)

I didn’t stop watching The Expanse because of anything to do with The Expanse, more because of the struggling to be a human thing. But here I am, back, finishing off S1.

First of all, this show needs a previously on. Even when I was watching one episode a week pretty consistently, I still felt like I needed a neat little summary going in. Take a couple weeks off and I’ve given up on anything other than Cool Vibes and Look, Action!!

I do still really like Eros station and just the set design in general. The bit in the arcade-space reminded me of the fsociety headquarters in Mr. Robot, possibly because I found my old notes on it recently and I kind of want to rewatch it, I think. But I also loved the whole ‘coins falling on a dead body after a death-match’ shot—very metal. I thought the episode did a good job of having finale-worthy character moments, like Holden choosing not to save Kenzo (do I entirely remember who Kenzo is? No. I mean I remember who he is but not when he was last seen. But that’s okay because I get, like, the meta of what they’re trying to do, I read the moment in its context, sort of like knowing what part of speech a word in a foreign language is, but not what it means). Or Naomi and the little girl—portentous.

I sort of wanted there to be more explanation, both since this was the season finale and because I thought the end of the last episode set up a possible Exposition-Heavy next installment, but it did lean heavier on the action sequences/movement-based plot and less on actually giving context to anything or providing answers. So I have mixed feelings about that. Like I do think tantalizing clues, like whatever they were doing with Julie’s body, or whatever the blue human shape attacking Kenzo was at the end, are appropriate for a finale ep, but I needed some MORE. Is Julie still ‘alive’ somehow? Is the blue light indicative of this substance being more than just a weapon? That’s what I’d like, honestly. The explanation Holden and Miller outline in this episode—it’s just a really big, really bad weapon, and Bad Guys are using Eros as a testing ground for it, hoping to pit all three major players against each other over their suspicions of it—is certainly, like, a plot. A plot I’ve heard before. But understandable, digestible, solid. Classic, one might say.

But what if… something else. What if it’s not just a weapon? What if its ability to brutally kill is just the first thing it does? What if it can also reform or reconstitute? What if it’s absorbing rather than killing? What if the resultant bodies have some sort of unique use or value? That would certainly take the show’s themes of The Machine literally chewing up and spitting out the bodies of the underclass for the benefit of the upper class to a new level. I thought there were some indications of this—not this specifically but an unknown additional level—in the finale. Whatever they were doing with Julie’s body, and the line about saving us all. That Holden and Miller’s explanation, despite its plausibility, is left hanging as not quite complete or not quite accounting for all the facts. The human figure in the blue light at the end. That we have so little exposition and so much of an air of mystery around the whole episode, as if we’d really learned almost nothing here, despite all the action.

I’m not saying I’m necessarily getting my hopes up for any of this because it’s so purely speculative and I could easily see the show moving off in some totally different direction.

A few other random thoughts: the Julie-hallucination turning into Amos made me legitimately laugh. Like this episode is not funny and the show is pretty overall serious but I laughed for real. The funniest character for it to actually be. Also, love guard dog Amos making a return. I think Holden and Naomi are bros. Alex has grown on me a lot. I like when he takes out the country twang voice. Usually the Roci looks like a bullet but today it sort of looked like some kind of bug, while it was still attached to the dock.

[irresistiibles]

was that bright vachirawit? oh no no, that was just emery anden, a canon character from the green bone saga. they are twenty years old, use he/him, and are not aware that they are not actually from washington dc. too bad they can’t stray from this city for long.

how long has your character been here

two months but he thinks it's been for around 13 years.

what is your character’s job

he's a student on the premed track.

where has your character been pulled from in their fandom

either at the end of book 1 or early book 2 right after chapter three i can settle when he becomes aware and age him up a year if i have to.

has any magic affected your character

the memories got yoinked real good

more info:

goes by anden or andy!

okay, basically, the green bone saga is about warring clans (plagiarizing ollies intro just for this line). the no peak clan is run by the kaul family, who took anden in when he was very young after his mother died in like a real gruesome way that i am not going to type out because i'll make myself ill. luckily the kaul took him in and he was raised basically as their family, feeling really close and grateful to the family.

what's important to know is she died because jade, which in the series can give certain people enhanced abilities, can also have negative affects when used in excess. it's really a person to person sort of thing

but it greatly traumatized anden, who is sensitive to jade for a number of factors

he was great with it, but in his first time using it outside of school went on to kill three people, and to his real horror, almost enjoyed doing so. he had some fun with it, and immediately realized how great jade was before pulling himself back

he wound up humiliating himself and his family at his graduation day by refuses jade and has been struggling since but like my guy truly just doesn't trust himself with it and is a really good kid! he would do anything for his family beyond lose himself to jade, and given what he witnessed with his mom he would hope his family wouldn't want him to lose himself to jade! and he knows that he will if he uses it regularly, so he's kinda been stuck

now what does anden believe his life was? he thinks he was born in thailand, but after an accident killed his family when he was very young he wound up living with a distant family friend in america and spent most of his life with them

and though he never fully felt like he perfectly fit in it was a good life

he's in college now and has been living on his own for the first time ever which has been a semi difficult adjustment but he's making it through

he has a hard time doing things in moderation. he smokes and drinks a little but won't do anything harder than that and he can definitely have a temper but he works hard to reign it in. if he gets to the point of starting a fight though it's going to be a real serious fight.

not the sort of person you'd assume can throw a punch but you'd be incorrect

but he's a nice kid! he's a hard worker who's polite and means well. he's kinda of awkward and has a natural tendency to keep to himself even if he wants friends. will be stubborn and even aggressive if it's something that he cares about or he's pushed a little too long.

he's also very afraid of himself and wants to be helpful in a way that probably isn't entirely helpful and should probably see a therapist or just scream really loud just one time that also might help him

potential plots:

a roommate or apartment neighbors. it's definitely in one of the cheaper areas of the city, but not completely run down.

fellow students, study buddies in particular. he is a very hard worker but isn't naturally gifted in his classes by any means

a gym buddy/casual sparring partner. for your quiet polite premed student anden is kinda stacked and though he doesn't remember being in any legitimate fights he does think he grew up doing martial arts and has an interest in that.

just general friends please

past casual dates for other masc muses.

he volunteers at a hospital over the weekends so anyone he could know from that. maybe a doctor that's sort of a mentor for him or fellow volunteers or anyone who works in the hospital

a bad influence. anden definitely has some rage and bad traits he works pretty hard not to lean into, so you know what he needs someone to just kinda bring out the worst in him

the family he grew up with. he wasn't officially adopted but these would still be people he sees as either siblings or parental figures.

someone to just get him to go out more rather than just hole up and study. make sure he like goes out to a bar and lives out his twenties a bit please

someone for him to but heads with. maybe the person isn't even aware they're annoying andy since it takes him a while to be vocal about that sort of thing but he should get to snap a little.

[albatris]

plot just took a weird and unexpected turn but im into it im vibin

[velvet-jellyfish]

Why are medieval movies always serious war dramas? I just want a medieval rom com. No listen - it could be so good:

The film opens with the wedding - William de something or other is a young nobleman who expected to spend the rest of his life in a monastery illuminating books when his older brother suddenly dies, leaving him with a title and a huge estate to run. He needs a wife and heir to legitimize his claim, and Eleanor is the young daughter of the lord in the neighboring estate. She is eager to get out of her fathers house and become a wife, and the marriage will be a strategic alliance between the two families. Everything is perfect.

However, it instantly becomes clear that the newlyweds can’t stand each other. He thinks she is a shallow teenager, she thinks he’s a pretentious asshole. As soon as they are alone on their wedding night, they make a plan. Instead of consummating their marriage, they will write to the pope with some excuse (that I need to actually research) and request an annulment. The letter will take several months to reach the Vatican and back, and in the mean time they decide to keep it a secret and play the role of a happy couple.

Shenanigans ensue. Running an estate is hard, and both of them are terrible at it. Eleanor starts off on the wrong foot with the seneschal and the servants, the money isn’t adding up, and William has to deal with his serfs coming to him with increasingly hilarious and convoluted complaints. He snores, she hogs the blankets. The members of the household spy and gossip, the animals are underfoot, and someone is always playing the bagpipes at the worst time. The newlyweds bicker and argue and can’t wait for the letter to arrive so they can finally drop the charade and part ways.

After a while though, Eleanor starts getting the hang of being a lady. It turns out she has a brilliant head for math and logistics, and when she figures out that William’s seneschal has been cheating him and fixes the budget to get them through the winter, he starts to trust and rely on her to run the estate. It turns out that William’s abrasivness was hiding a pious and sensitive interior, and once he realised she won’t judge him for it he teaches Eleanor to appreciate art and philosophy (and also how to sword fight because this is my movie and I want a hot fencing lesson scene). Eleanor helps William come to terms with his bisexuality, he learns to respect her struggle as a woman in a patriarchal society (using language that make sense for the period). They realize that unfortunately they also find each other very attractive.

(Someone needs to come up with an actual plot, I’m not good at that.)

The letter from the pope finally arrives granting the annulment, but they take one look at it, toss it in the fire, and go consummate the marriage.

The costumes will all be accurate to the 14th century and thus used to comedic effect whenever possible. The church, the feudal system, and other institutions of Medieval society will be treated as flawed yet nuanced parts of everyday life, people will be reasonably religious for the time period, and there will be lots of dirty jokes (and a hot fencing lesson scene).

Hollywood give me money!!!

[astaroth1357]

Brothers React to a Demigod MC 

So, I've gotten some interest to do a Brothers follow-up to a previous request of mine (Undateables React to a Cute, Badass MC), however, I've thus far refused to write one. Honestly, this HC actually plays on a trope I personally dislike and had it not been a request I would have never done it to start with. I just can't see any reasonable way a non-magic human can beat a bunch of demons, I just can't, and that hinders my imagination quite a bit. …But someone who’s not so human? That I can get behind. Fair warning, I grew up with the Percy Jackson series so that’s going to paint quite a bit of how I see modern demigods. Ready for things to get super-ultra fanfic-y for a bit?

Intro:

The day to kidnap bring the exchange students to the Devildom has finally come and the demons have all gathered in the Council Room to open their portal to the human world. Really, things started without a hitch - the portal opened with and their future student dropped down out of it and landed on the floor… before they suddenly leapt up, pulled out a weapon, and lunged at them!

… This isn’t your normal human, it is?

Lucifer

Oh Devil, this couldn’t have been any farther than what they wanted… They were looking for a human and they managed to pull out a halfling! A divine halfling no less!! Why wasn’t this in their file?!

Look, Lucifer might not be on good terms with his father, but even he knows he had it better than any children of the pagan gods… The levels of petty vindictiveness that run through that bunch are literally the stuff of legends...

After he and Barbatos were able to restrain the MC before they hurt themselves or anyone else, Diavolo explained everything to them and gave them a pardon for attacking the Demon Prince on sight… After they identified themselves and their parentage, Lucifer knew they were in for some shit…

He and Diavolo had to iron out an apology letter to their godly parent for days just to keep from saying anything that could accidentally cause a second Troy or worse... It was a mess...

But on the bright side, the “human” came pre-prepared for fighting monsters and demons, which honestly took a bit of a load off his shoulders. That’s less responsibility for Mammon - and in his experience, the less responsibility Mammon has, the better things usually turn out.

… Though their ability to actually hold their own in a fight did make things complicated sometimes - like whenever he was their perceived opponent... 

He wasn’t expecting to have to manage a being that was actually capable of meeting him toe-to-toe on the battlefield and it did hinder his intimidation factor to some degree…It was hard to be threatening to someone who’s likely faced worse than you could ever offer.

In the end it probably worked out for the best, as a live exchange student is better for Diavolo than a dead one - but man did it get on his nerves until they made their pact together… Be scared of him, dammit!

Mammon

The first time he tried to threaten the human, they straight up pulled out a weapon and looked like they were ready to whip his ass!! Didn’t they know he wasn’t being serious?? 😫

He really didn’t know why he had to be on babysitting duty, anymore... This huma-er demigod could handle themselves just fine!

When he first ditched them with Levi, he later found out they managed to cleanly toss his brother over their head and make a break for it all by themselves! And Levi’s no pushover either!!

Later, he saw them getting ambushed on their way back from school and they soundly knocked out about five demons before he even caught up to them… and he’s, like, fast and stuff… 

Their strength is kind of unreal at times, but he could tell they were still far from a mindless killing machine. They were more or less a normal person, they had wants and dreams like anybody else, but they just happened to be a long stronger than the average mortals around them. 🤷‍♀️

After he eventually got to know them and a bit about how their life worked, he felt a little bad for them... Who wants to be hunted down just for being born?

After learning about their struggles, Mammon ended up resolving to help keep them safe (even if a part of him knew they didn’t need him that much).

I mean, if the whole world’s against you, then you can use all the help you can get... right?

Leviathan 

Levi found out exactly one thing about them within the first two minutes of meeting them… their reflexes were killer.

After Mammon ditched them on Day One, he tried to drag the human to his room to tell them his genius plan but they broke out of his grip and threw him flat on his back like was just second nature! 

He was stuck on the ground for a full minute, trying to process what just happened, while they ran off into the House all alone…

Did he just get tossed around… by a human?? Was he really that pathetic!?!

Finding out later that they were actually half-god certainly helped out his self-esteem because, man, if he had lost so easily to a human of all things... He might have just never left his room again…

Levi pretty much kept his distance from them until they finally made a pact together and then he discovered that the MC wasn’t so scary after all. If he’s being honest, being in the same house as a demigod was actually kind of cool...! 

Like, it was almost exactly the plot of the show: “Wait, I Thought I Was the Son of a Pagan God So What Am I Doing in a Christian Hell??” but their MC seemed to know a lot more about fighting than the protagonist of that show ever did…

Plus, because he never had to worry about their safety, he had even more excuse to never leave his room. Win-win!

Satan

A demigod, eh…? He had done plenty of research into human world mythologies in his spare time, frankly he thought the old gods had died out - but it seems they were still up and kicking… and making babies for whatever reason? Horny bastards...

Satan's original interest in the MC was purely academic. It’s not everyday that you get to meet someone of such a unique heritage and he fully intended to learn if all the legends about their greatness were true… and well...

He could say that the MC was certainly different than how he pictured humans being. He’d never met very many before, but from what he could gather they were a weak race that really got by on wit and persistence… However, nothing about the MC was weak.

Their aptitude for combat was surprisingly sharp, both in skill and reflexes. He had once blown up at them in anger and not only did they dodge his swipes but they got in a good few hits themselves with a nearby lamp… He never once thought a mortal could give him a black-eye but, somehow, they pulled it off. 🤷‍♀️

Combine their physical skill with what magical gifts were granted to them by their godly-half and they were a force to be reckoned with… Even Solomon seemed to hesitate and think more about his actions around them (which is saying something for a sorcerer of his strength).

It’d be fair to say a part of him grew to respect the MC long before they ever made their pact and that respect only grew afterwards. If he had to be bound to any master, human or otherwise, he’d rather it be one that he could right about consider an equal not only as a friend, but in strength as well.

Asmodeus 

A demigod…? Oooo, he hadn’t come across one of those since he bedded Aeneas all those centuries ago… Such a gorgeous man, got all his looks from his mother~! 🤭

Asmo was probably the most interested in their godly heritage, but it felt like he was treating them like a zoo exhibit for a while… Something pretty and new to look at, but not exactly someone he wanted to know personally...

He openly and readily admitted that watching their little demigod in action got him hot and bothered (or well, more hot and bothered than usual ) but it didn’t take him to see they weren’t interested at the time…

He decided that he just had to have a pact with them after they saved him from Henry 1.0! It was before he noticed the giant snake and he was lurching back to strike, but the human swept in to knock him out of the way. They probably could have made mince meat of the creature themselves if Levi weren’t begging for them to spare his former pet...

Post-pact Asmo treated them with a lot more respect… but also still fanboyed over their fighting skills hardcore. 

Like, their body had to be fit to keep up with all those monsters, right?? What was their training routine? Could he watch?? Oh please say he can watch!! He just can’t get enough of that fighter’s physique…! 😍

Beelzebub 

So… the human isn’t a human but only part human? And the other part is a god? Does that make them any sturdier than normal humans…? Call him curious…

Beel was probably one of the few brothers who was legitimately weary of the MC from the beginning… He can get a certain feel for a person pretty quickly and something about them just felt…frankly, kind of dangerous.

But they also intrigued him a little… Beel’s used to being one of the strongest demons in any room he walks into (not a boast, just a fact) so for him to get that feel from a mortal was pretty impressive. A part of him just wanted to test them… you know?

So. He did. He asked them to help him train his martial arts one day and even with his awareness, he was not expecting the results that he got.

The MC was strong. Very strong. They were not only able to keep up with him and dodge his blows, but they were able to predict his moves and counterattack in kind. They didn’t even need to tell him that they had actually been fighting for their life for years, he could tell. They had a skill you don’t get from practice matches...

After that point, the two would go to each other to train and keep their skills sharp… but also just to spar for fun. Their fighting styles made a pretty good match and they bonded pretty damn quick because of it. 

If anime tells us anything, when you find a good fight buddy, you stick with them. Even if one’s part god and the other is a demon. 🤷‍♀️ 

Belphegor 

A demigod is still human enough to hate, sorry MC. Not that he knew about their godly heritage at first…

Really, he should have been a little more suspicious of how easily they seemed to take to life in the Devildom... Weren’t demons supposed to scare humans? Why did they seem so comfortable down here...?

His confirmation only came when he tried to enact the final part of “Use the MC to Escape the Attic!” plan and take their life to seal the deal… but oh boy, was he outclassed real quick… 

The MC had already socked him in the jaw by the time he got his full demon form out and then they threw him across the room by the tail… the TAIL!! And it hurt like a bitch, too!! Even during the full blown fight that followed, he could tell they were holding back and it pissed him off something fierce...!

Why was the MC so strong?!? Humans weren’t supposed to be strong!!!

His brothers heard all the commotion and the Lilith confrontation ended up happening up in the attic between a somewhat beat-up Belphie and a barely-scratched MC. Had Beel not come to his defense on instinct, it might have turned out worse for him in all honesty… Something about that human just wasn’t right…

He only found out about their god-half after everything settled down and he promised not to try killing them again (not that anyone thought he could...) and that put some things into perspective. So the Lastborn Ruler of Hell isn’t as strong as one mortal demigod…? Ouch. Okay, fine then... Whatever...

He does think it’s too bad he missed them beating the crap out of the rest of his brothers, though (minus Beel)... That would have been fun to see. 😔

So I tried to keep this one God-parent neutral, but I’ve upgraded this to its own series! Check it out if you’re interested! 😊

Demigod MC Series: Intro, Aphrodite, Hermes

[notajinn]

Update to movies I've seen for the first time as of Jan 2024:

First Blood (Rambo): I was already aware of the the first Rambo movie being very different from the big action movies the later ones would become, but I was expecting something closer to Rocky with very little action. It is very much an action movie, but in the view of a defender. Honestly kinda had "Home Alone as an adult" vibes with Rambo just trying to violently (but not murderously) keep himself safe. This along with Rocky 1 and 2 have also solidified Sylvester Stallone as one of my favourite Hollywood actors. And I don't usually remember actor names, so that's saying something. The fact that the majority of Rambo's dialogue is in that breakdown at the end really hits.

Mission Impossible: I would have loved this movie as a teen. The heist to break into the CIA was still legitimately cool even though I've seen it referenced in other movies already.

Austin Powers International Man of Mystery: I had seen the second Austin Powers movie back in the day, and thought it was decent, but I really enjoyed this one! A few too many penis jokes, but otherwise a funny movie and a good parody.

Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Black Pearl: This is one of those movies that I feel everyone in the world had seen except me. I had vague knowledge of it from Kingdom Hearts though. Outside of being too long, it's a really solid movie. The main characters are interesting, and the plot is good enough.

Muppet's Christmas Carole: Not only had I not seen this movie before, but I'd never seen any movie about the Christmas Carole story. Obviously I knew the general idea of the villain being scared straight by three ghosts, but not the details. I'm surprised by how well the serious scenes were done given the light tone of most of the Muppets parts.

Akira: Another movie I felt everyone had seen but me. I don't know what I thought this movie would be about, but it certainly wasn't psychic children in the slums and government corruption. The visuals obviously didn't hit as strong as they probably would have if I watched it in it's prime, but it's still a good-looking movie. Also it's interesting that nearly every character in the movie is a jerk, but just to different degrees.

Everything Everywhere All at Once: Now this was a visually powerful movie I'm actually seeing in it's prime, unlike Akira. It's funny and hopeful and it's stuck with me ever since I saw it. The morale of fighting hatred with kindness is not new, but something about the execution of it here just hits different and genuinely changed how I deal with people a little.

There were also a few movies I re-watched that I had seen as kids but not as an adult. Namely Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (the 90s one) which is way more serious than I remember, and also has an extremely out of character Donatello. And Beetlejuice, which is still visually fun but also more crude than my kid brain realized at the time.

I think my main takeaway from watching these old movies is that most of them hold up, but my tastes have changed. Specifically I'm way less interested in "action movies" unless they have good characters or story. But the spectacle of the action isn't a draw for me anymore, which is why I didn't like Terminator 2 or Mission Impossible more than "they're okay" but loved Terminator 1.

I'll try to use that info to help me decide on the future movies I watch.

In my continuing journey to watch famous Hollywood movies that were popular when I was growing up but ignored in favour of Bollywood, I watched Office Space. All I knew about it was the printer destruction scene, and the virus.

This is the most average movie I’ve ever seen. There are good parts (the printer, the interview with the consultants), but most of the movie is just okay enough to keep watching with mild interest.

Strangely I’ve never heard anyone mention the main plot point of the movie, which is “how would you approach life if you were always relaxed” which is a pretty fun concept for an office-centered movie.

Ultimately however I chose to watch this yesterday instead of Rocky, and I think I would have enjoyed Rocky more.

I’ll find out next week. Probably. I haven’t been “on schedule” watching these every week.

Actually since Tumblr has enough space, the movies I’ve watched so far in this endeavour to catch up are:

- Alien

- Terminator 1 and 2

- Die Hard

- The Iron Giant

- The Incredibles (okay this one was in the 2000s but I was still a kid)

- Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring (I read the book trilogy, just never watched the movies)

Movies I’m still planning to watch, in no particular order:

- Rocky

- Aliens

- Spirited Away

- The other two Lord of the Rings movies

- Some more recent movies like The Green Knight, Wolf of Wall Street, and Everything Everywhere All at Once

[the-teddy-bear-butch]

hey!

liked the top 3 list, wondered if you wanted to share from any of these?

31

36

46

71

<3

Hiya! Thank you so much for the asks dude!!! You chose some really fun ones to ramble about <33

Link to the asks

31: Top 3 things to draw/doodle

Oooooh, I doodle a lot, but I fall back on a few things

My own characters, especially the main characters from my novel (check them out at @the-supernova-sapphics )

Werewolves! I like to mess around with ears and face shapes and fur to make them match their human form, it’s very fun. And I just have a very intense werewolf special interest

As much as I talk about HATING drawing hands, they are okay sometimes. I doodle hands a lot to try to get a feel for them and it’s fun to try different gestures

36: Top 3 books from your childhood

I am a horse girl. I grew up on Black Beauty by Anna Sewell. I had a series of classic books condensed for children, and then I read the actual book at least a dozen times growing up

In the same vein, I also had a condensed kid’s version of Call of the Wild by Jack London. Loved that one a lot <33 I have yet to read the original, but I intend to do so

Bit of a strange one, but Kalahari by Jessica Khoury was a favorite in middle school. I hadn’t read anything like it before and I haven’t really since. Interesting concept, minor twist on a zombie virus almost? and I loved it

46: Top 3 fan fictions you’ve read

OH BOY

Okay so my favorite fanfic is probably Bloodletting by @agentgenevra . I have talked about it a LOT over here and I will sing it’s praises forever. Let me do it yet again. First of all, vampire Nancy. Vampire Robin. That is enough to get you hooked. But! This fic has one of the BEST AU plot lines I have ever read. The way each character and their individual motivations and personalities connect into this big web of a plot is FASCINATING. And! Tension! Tension! Tension! Eve is a genius and I fucking adore this fic.

Second place would most likely go to Dancing in the Moonlight by summersociety. I want this fic injected directly into my bloodstream. It’s somehow serious and unapologetically goofy at the same time. Again with tension! Monster hunter Nancy is a badass! Werewolf Robin is complicated! AROO BROKE MY HEART. Martha is also a queen.

Finally, I think I’m going to have to go with Raise Dead by @eskawrites . Go in with the warning that this is the only fic that LEGITIMATELY, not as an exaggeration, made me cry. The feelings are very raw and very intense, this fic will break you heart and then mend it. Chapter 3 especially ruined me. Angst galore dude. And very poetic writing, I love it.

71: Top 3 songs of this month

Only three? Damn I gotta really narrow down the favorites list

Everywhere, Everything by Noah Kahan is one of the best romantic songs I’ve ever heard, it’s kind of giving Hozier imagery but a little more upbeat and also this man’s voice does things to me

Late Bloomer by Semler, I’m writing a fic based on this one and it’s just very soft and good and I love the lyricism, plus the guitar!!!

Real genre skip here, but I swear Punk Tactics by Joey Valence and Brae is laced with something, that song is addictive and my funky neurodivergent brain loves it

Honorable mentions are Everlong by Foo Fighters, The View Between Villages by Noah Kahan, and Maple Syrup by The Backseat Lovers