#leaves behind the company
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movie that's written and produced exactly like one of those wholesome hallmark christmas movies (right down to the jaunty yet sentimental variation on a christmas hymn soundtrack) where a big shot city slicker has to go to a small town to close a deal after her predecessor ran away with a widowed yet jacked christmas tree salesman, only for it to descend into an outright cultist folk horror film in the second act
#idky but those movies fill me with dread in a way actual horror films sometimes can't#idk if i see a woman leave her whole life behind to save christmas. that's like midsommar to me. midwintar.#anyway twist the company are in on it. they're feeding these women to the christmastown entity and it's turning them into stepfordwife husks
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11:43 pm
#v60 spoilers#lethal company spoilers#lethal company#lethal company maneater#messy thing to get my feelings out about a specific dilemma i had (leaving a maneater behind when we had to go)#my art
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Sight of a Star - Blue-ish Star Ryōshū and Don Quixote
#HERES HOW BLUE-ISH STAR BELIEVERS CAN STILL WIN I PROMISE#Rendering sucks but I do like how these look very much. I hate drawing armour. big fan of dramatic shadows however.#but! as for justifications:#B-iS is an abno regarding what one so desperately wants but cannot have - possibly connecting to Blue Star and the paradise-like place-#people wish to reach by throwing themselves into it. though what is offered by B-iS is a much less refined yet as tantalising#given the text of 'The irresistible allure is almost tearing you apart' and the less refined bit being implied by both design#[jagged edges of the actual blue shape and legs like dolls - both unlike BS' much rounder and more naturalistic design]#in short it's the manifestation of impossible dreams - for Don this is her quest for a just knighthood in the City of all places#and for Ryōshū [though idk her source] it is her final work of art - the Hell Screen#when approached one's body is 'pushed away' as if a manifestation of how it is unachievable. at least it is for them#'To be truly blue the one with the true blue must be left alone in one’s blueness.'#is what I interpret as: 'to truly dream the dreamer must be left to one's fantasies'#dreams by nature do not intersect well with reality. all their flaws will be shown and they will crack under the pressure of the real world#it is why the dream pushes them away. to preserve itself. also probably has something to do with how DQ also has void dream#and this abno gives pride boosts in its event. and I personally see pride as a sort of 'self assurance' or 'self above others' so to speak#as to chase ones dreams one must think themselves the exception. as the one that can persevere over the City#plus the HP damage and the various juxtapositions in the 'forward' option may be in reference to how dreams and reality don't mix.#harming those who chase them. though all the same the 'backwards' option shows that simply tossing them aside shall hurt in its own way#to think oneself 'impure' enough to give up on chasing it is all the same resignation on your uniqueness#as for the gift: the name is possibly to do with how lower stars seem easier to reach. and the effect of damage at minus SP....#going insane dream chasing?#but to take ones leave allows for it to be left behind without any further effects. you did not look at your dreams. acknowledge them at al#but are you better off like that? not dreaming? forgetting that brilliantly unfinished star?#but anyways I hope you liked my rambles. also this abno and everything related to Blue Star is so tastefully C flavoured that I love them#and fun fact! when I was first generally mapping sinners to unfightable/EGOless abnos I entirely forgot Ryōshū somehow. which led to this.#they don't have weapons they just kick real hard and it works well enough#limbus company#ryōshū lcb#don quixote lcb#🎠🚬
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magnus and fisher origin story makes me fucking sob
#'can we address the elephant in the room griffin? i'm not leaving that fish behind.' scream#'i grab it.' 'it doesn't understand being grabbed it's fighting you a little-' 'i start humming' SCREAM#'it delighted in your company magnus. and it still does.' SCREAM SCREAM SCREAM!!!!!!#stuff#taz#taz balance#so fucked up and twisted
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limutuals another poll
part of a new series of limbus polls i think reblogs with your answers and such would be appreciated :>
#kay posting#limbus company#pollblr#poll#tumblr polls#I think i would be gloom#not bc oh boohoo i am so sad but bc i think it fits#other gloom base egops are ishmael and rodya and honglu#all very mecore#based off their storys from what we've seen it also fits me as a person#ill admit that at first i was one of the canto 2 didnt matter losers before tkt but now that we(i) know more#she is quite me fr#(i didnt plan all of this before making the poll but thinking about it all it fits in quite nicely)#like like#with all that we saw in tkt it starts to fit in more that her ego is gloom despite how cheery she gives off ykyk?#with sonya and being left behind and all that#and now ishmael#based off of how she was for most of canto 5 youd think shed be wrath but#i think that it being gloom is an important distinction esp with the end of her canto#cause like it isnt just wrath and anger towards ahab as it seems but more gloom towards the whole situation and at the end of the canto#we see her be the bigger person and see past the wrath and revenge leaving the gloom ykyk?#maybe i am just pulling all of this way out of my ass#and yeah i gave this like no thought but ne ways#and honglu is me fr bc he is silly and whimsical#anyways anyways i would be gloom#kay goes blah blah blah
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Ride 749: The last Straight Road*
(NdT.: same pun Kinaka always makes with his name and the word for straight road)
Pag 1
1: I....
3: Imaizumi-san!!
4: Go- good work!!
Good work!!
You were taking a long time for this lap
Pag 2
1: Yes, teh, I got a fl-fl-flat- my bike!!
Yessir!!
2: It's the tire!!
4: Only tires can get a flat
Ah- damn, yes, that's right
Right!!
6: I thought something like this might have happened, so I brought these
Replacement tubes, tire levers, and a pump. Use them
Pag 3
2: This is unusual!! I never thought Imaizumi-san was the attentive type – is it just for us!?
Yeah!! I thought first and second years were just not important to him....
3: You don't want to use the,?
We'll use them, thank you so much!!
4: You saved us, teh....!!
That's true
6: Ah, uhm... but..... Imaizumi-san
Earlier you said that
7: Sugimoto-san won't come”, what did you mean?
Pag 4
1: He retired
Pag 5
1: He's still displayed on the board, but
3: There's still time until midnight
If Sugimoto-kun....
4: Please leave the possibility open in case Sugimoto-kun wants to come back!!
5: Onoda insisted
6: Re... tired.....
Sugi..... moto-san....
Pag 6
1: He used up all his stamina and mental strength in his fight against Danchiku, and he was defeated
2: You didn't notice because you've been on the course the whole time
4: Ah... actually, when it got dark, Sugimoto-san and Danchiku-san passed us various times... teh
Huh!? That? So at that time-!?
5: You have no time to talk about unimportant things
As soon as you're done with the repairs, run, first years
6: Soon
Pag 7
1: Waa, ye-yes, teh, thank you for the tools
Yeah, there's still 40km
2: If we join our strengths....
Don't cooperate
5: Teh!?
7: From now on, you can't allow yourselves to run like friends
8: Huh....
Our “buddies” stickers.....!?
You have to fight
Pag 8
1: And win the last spot to be an Inter High member!!
Pag 9
1: Fa.... ight....
2: Against.... Kinaka-kun
3: Against.... Rokudai
4: 35km left!!
Gooo!! Kinakaa, Rokudaii!!
Do your best...!!
5: I feel like they'll be able to run the 1000km!!
Amazing!
Ah, but there was no distance between them just now?
Pag 10
1: Fight....
2: The spot as a regular in the two-times national champion, Sohoku....
3: I can't take it by just being friendly....!!
4: And also
5: There's Sugimoto-san's wish!!
Pag 11
1: Wa- wait, please, Imaizumi-san
But.... if in this training camp the condition to become the sixth regular was to finish the 1000km first....
2: Then why did Sugimoto-san and Danchiku-san race!?
4: I came here to give you a message from Sugimoto
5: I think, I think it's necessary, you know
Sohoku is a team that connect and support each other
6: Just like during our first year, you, Naruko, and Onoda, connected your wishes and aimed for the goal
7: And last year Kaburagi ran with Aoyagi-san and carried the team until the mountains on the third day
8: So I think we need it
9: Our third year Inter High members
Pag 12
1: Definitely need a “first year”!!
3: Even if he knew he was making his own situation worse, he thought about the best shape for the team would be
4: He accepted it, and fought
Pag 13
1: For the fifth place
3: Among the first years, those two are left, I look forward to see what they do!!
That's too much food
4: Danchiku probably understood it, too
That's why he fought with all his strength
6: Now you two have to run with the weight of those expectations on your back!!
7: Fight, against your opponent and against yourself!! Use all your strength
Pag 14
1: And pull to yourself that last jersey!!
2: Straaa-
Pag 15
1: Straight roaaad!!
2: - traight!!
3: …. ngh
Ugh.....
4: Kinaka-kun.....
5: Don't cry, Rokudai!!
Pag 16
1: What are you doing, oi!! I'll leave you behind like this!! I'll tear you off!!
If you give up, then it's lucky for me!!
2: My goal has always been the Inter High jersey!!
To get back at those senpai who made fun of me!!
3: To show it to the Onii-san who taught me how to ride bikes!!
So, for that....
6: So I'm telling you not to cry!!
Pag 17
1: But, Kinaka-kun....
It's that your “Straitgh road”, wasn't fast at all....!!
4: You knee? It's your knee, right?
Since when? Since a while ago?
5: Since when we were at about 800km
Pag 18
1: It's a race, Rokudai
2: You should have told me, teh
I didn't notice, teh!!
3: I'm such an incapable former manager, teh....
4: Since when I lost to you in the first years' race
6: I've been thinking that I would definitely not lose the next time we race
7: Even though the truth is that I don't really care about that anymore
So, once again...
Pag 19
1: It's a race, Rokudai!!
3: Let's do it, Rokudai!!
I can't, teh
4: Race me, pedal!!
I don't want to, teh....
5: Fight me!!
I won't pedal, teh
Pag 20
1: Because, if I fight you now, Kinaka-kun, I'll end up winning, teh
Pag 22
1: With that kindness of yours, support our senpai during the Inter High
#yowamushi pedal#yowamushi pedal translations#yowapeda#yowapeda manga#yowamushi pedal manga#yowamushi pedal spoilers#ride 749#the tags arent enough for the essay i want and need to write about this chapter#most painful chapter but also one of the best chapter of the whole manga imho#IVE BEEN CRYING SINCE YESTRDAY WTF WATANABE HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO MY BABIES#YOU NEED TO PAY FOR MY THERAPY NOW#kinaka and roku's relationship is probably the most wholesome in the whole manga i love them so much#and this chap HURT SO BAD OH MY GOD#kinakaaaaa you're so strong for this ;A; the way he didnt want to tell roku about his knee bc he knew that roku would break#the way he even tried to provoke him to push him to race!! and he says he didnt want to lose against him again! but!!#He actually doesnt care about that anymore!!! hes just doing this for rokudai!!!#And rokuuuu!!! baby boy ;A; hes the purest boy ever!!! He didnt want to win like this against kinaka he didnt want to leave him behind ;A;#leave me alone im gonna cry forever ;A; (no actually dont leave me alone keep me company in my suffering plz)#page 21 is forever ingraved in my soul#even tho imaizumi told them not to cooperate in the end they did support each other until the last moment ;A;#(on a lighter not im happy that we finally have a reason for the race btwn sugimoto and danchiku - they both knew the team needed a first#year* so only one of them could be on the team)
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idk how to explain it but i wish sparkling was from a different source or from something that i actually like, because unfortunately i will always be associated with cookie run and i don't like it
#dulce posting#it sounds weird to say but like i really wish i wasn't jsut associated with cookie run#it's fine. the art and story can be interesting. the characters are nice. i mean obviously i fell in love w sparkling for a reason#but i don't. Like it ??#it's not a game series I'm passionate about i don't care to look into the lore and stories and find out more. i don't like associating-#-with the fanbase that much. i wouldn't recommend it to people ever. i don't like the company bc they don't care and just want to get money#it's not even that fun. i just feel an obligation to come back to it because of spark#and its not as simple as just dropping the game and not associating. i love spark and i would never leave him behind. he's my soulmate#i can deal with it or whatever I just wish it was different
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Finally starting to put paint down on this. I did the undersketch over a year ago and it's just been sitting on the easel until now. 😅
-Bonus pics of my painting area(kitchen) that i took a while ago-
#dragon age#thedas#dragon age inquisition#fen'harel#oil paint#art studio#i have to move and leave this space behind next year and im so sad about it#my little Sera kitty always keeps me company#pretty haunted art
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#my art#project moon#limbus company#lcb dongbaek#woke up feeling very sad about dongbaek (<- understatement)#ueueueueueuuu :((#excited for the next event but also i feel like im leaving her behind....#i miss her. i miss dongbaek so much#fanart
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Rereading the dialog that is said during suppressions. Abel specifically says 'Loved Ones' as he speaks about those in the upper layer's demise and their struggle and urging to stop as continuing on is futile. Abram says 'colleagues'. 'Coworkers'. He does refer to them as 'Friends' once as well. But every other dialog is about Carmen or generalizing and saying 'everyone' rather than specifics. It just feels odd a bit to where he uses less strong terms when referring to relations with people and then afterwards only refers to Carmen by name rather than those still existing beside him. Even when it was stated by a facet of A and others (I can only remember Hokma off the top of my head. It may be only him which would make sense) refer to A having seen them as specifically 'Loved Ones'. Which is a far stronger showing and expression of emotion to those around you.
It makes me think of how he, Abram, expressed his desires, the desire to die [see: 'sink'/'sleep' for he explicitly refers to death consistently as slumber and when bringing the dead back 'waking them up'] and stop, in that moment. He constantly brings up, in general terms, self punishment and Carmen. Guilt that is carried with Carmen. Memories of her death, her passing. Of how she left without a smile. Of how she can no longer bask in the warmth of the sun she loved to do so frequently. Yet only of Carmen in name. Never anyone else or specifics of people, generalizations when referring to others and referring to them all inside a group, as a collective. Them and then Carmen. Focused on only that. On the fact he cannot move forward. Urging to just shut the eyes and to simply Sink. To Sleep. To die. It reminds me of when one goes ahead and becomes so interlaced with suffering and grief and despair that one simply stews inside of it, spiraling down further into that single train of thought. Holding onto the image of a dead and deceased one. It feels as if, in a more crude way of saying it as I cannot formulate a different way currrently at the moment, searching of 'justification' and a fitting reason to commit suicide. [I say Justification as what I really mean to say a 'fitting reason', that reason and end seeming to Be the Only way to continue, or lack of continue, at that point to him.] Rather than saying the names or specifics of those around him, of his loved ones still inside those metal boxes, he becomes enveloped in grief and only on Carmen. Abram's mistake which he fixates the most upon. Holds deep guilt for. Blames himself for. Saying he drove her to her death. That he is leaving her behind [I didnt save the exact quote but it was generally that]. When those inside the facility are people he also so clearly values and wished to bring back as well he, at this moment, primarily focuses on Carmen. Even when he does address the others it's in a more brief manner, having two pieces of dialog on the Sephirot specifically and it only relating to his Faults relating to them than the people themself when he speaks of Carmen in a more in depth manner. Perhaps it's still the wish clinging of to not hold trust in anyone. But it feels reminiscent to when a person tries to push themself and gain 'courage' to commit suicide. Of focusing only on the guilt and regret and the mourning of one already gone, who was so near and dear whom he did all of this for in the first place his desire only stemming from her and not the project itself, especially one who also killed herself, to go ahead and die as well. Perhaps it's not even an active thing he does in his mind. It's just become so overbearing that he has now gotten stuck in that never ending loop. Using far more stronger language of the woman dead and gone who he wishes to rejoin than of those currently alive and near to him, making them feel far more distant than they actually are mentally – at least in relations and connections wise. Depression does tend to tear down what one feels towards their loved ones and how they process and view relationships causing for people to exhibit such a thing by feeling distant in a room or alone with a loved one nearby as commonly known – and physically. I'm not saying that's 'totally what it is' or the sort. More of that reading it over again just reminded me of such a thing. Nothing revolutionary but more ramblings to process it all after it ended
#lobcorp spoilers#lobotomy corp spoilers#abram lobcorp#abel lobcorp#lobotomy corporation#lobcorp#[LCorp]#All the tags needed I think. I cant really do much else but do small words today or anything else more mentally straining than idle thought#Ill likely be better tomorrow. If not then the tomorrow after. If not then that day afterwards#that makes it sound daunting.... itll be ever so slightly marginally better after i have ice cream i think. there. more easy#back to lobcorp though... i always was struck with how abram speaks and describes things#yes the obvious far more gentle and softer language when describing death when everything else doesnt shy away from calling it what it is#but also the disconnect with how he says things and the reality of it in a sense...? more of contradictions at least#hard to describe rifht now. him saying carmen left leaving nothing behind when her nervous system is still There#of the abnormalities that have snippets of her even in A's perspective being bloodbath and the snow queen#of how the facility was built underground due to the grief A felt. the company that mourns her#shes everywhere yet nowhere at once. yet she left so mant things behind. from memories and hope to scars#'faded' 'forgotten' shes here. shes here.#stepping into the bathtub to they wouldnt feel any guilt and the abram saying it was His Fault [cant find exact quote i paraphrased it]#sorry for not providing exact quotes as well im not motivated to do much... at all.. cant find it in me besides general loose thoughts#[Musings]
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And they both drown...
Sources: Persuasion - Jane Austen, Eurydice - HD, Umbrella Academy)
#succession#shiv roy#tom wombsgans#tomshiv#succession spoilers#Hiiii#never done one of these before#sorry if its shit#the quotes are a bit random but i like them#i wish i knew more gut wrenching female rage poems#i wish i could have included a dido reference#omg the parallels of duty versus love and agency in suicide#and how shiv is pushed on by the ghost of her father#leaving behind tom who was on a path to power#but she has upstaged and undermined him#UGH#and the company is rome of course#web weaving
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being able to feel a very loving emotional connection to stuffed animals is all fun and games until you start to feel like real person guilt about having to leave them somewhere bc you can't bring three stuffed animals with you to a place because that's insane to do
#well it's okay my valentine's animals will keep each other company they will be okay to sit on my bed and hang out together#bc matt doll is my film watching buddy and it would be sadder and more upsetting to leave him behind. he is incorporated into the routine#also im more emotionally attached to him. though i am often more okay to leave him behind for stuff bc in my heart#i feel that he can take care of himself just fine. he's smart and capable he will be ok.#pretend that my feelings about that arent insane btw. pretend thats a normal feeling and assessment for a toy#static.soundz
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had an amazing interview yesterday.... was told I'd know by Monday.... but it's alleged they DRUG TEST and I just bought 6 packs of weed edibles 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
#AND!!!!! AND!!!!!! IVE GOT THE HOUSE TO MYSELF FOR A SOLID WEEK!!!!!!!#i guess ill know monday if i can get high that night or tuesday but like.... i want to have one now lmao#like.... the paper i signed was more worried about being drunk on the jo#and OBVIOUSLY i wouldnt show up to my folder customer service job high off my ass..... but that thc can stay in your system for awhilw#i had one last nigbt tk celebrate the interview so idk if im even in the clear to begin with#and like.... i told them my start date would ve the 20th & im out of town vefore that so the goal is like.... they go to achedule#and we have to schedule it way out so i have time to like.....not worry & get my pee clean#like.... it wouldnt matter so much if my parents werent LEAVING this E N T I R E week... like.... this is MY vacatioj too!!!!!#and i just bought it after a horrid week 😭😭😭😭😭 worked my ass of it for it in order to relax this week#like#i know i shouldnt be dependent on it and im really trying not to ve#but the anti-anxiety relaxing of it all helps so much#and im reeeeeally not the biggest fan of drinking....i pee too much 😭😭😭😭😭 ironically 😭😭😭😭😭😭#like.... at this point.... its like..... do i care about getting this job more than i care about letting my brain and body relax this week#i always put myself first & listen to my heart & soul to dictate what to do#but my mind just keeps thinking about getting that failed drug test back and going back to the job hunt#but im still IN the job hi t#*hunt#AND HERES THE THING!!!! walking around that damn office.... seeing what people were wearing.....#its professional but i know damn well theres people in there smoking weed#like.... 25 of the 50 employees i saw showed up in casual loungepants these people are not prestigious#and like.... the paper i signed.... they didnt even edit to include the company name????#it kept saying “the Company will not like you to drink on the clock and assumes you will not get behind company vechiles drunk either”#like.... tooooootally understandable i just wanna eat some edibles before im an official employee of your folder business my loves#let me have a 50mg and zone out for the night while im finally free from all these losers..... PLEASE#anyways......personal problems that my brain needs to expel so it doesnt tumble all around for the next few houes#WHILE I DOORDASH 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 fuck me#like..... i got this interview through indeed ill just keep going till i cant if it fails
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Unity CEO when he realizes he needs to find a new game company to exploit like a golddigger on her 3rd husband
#unity#unity engine#unity software controversy#memes#lets not forget this CEO is the same one behind the decline of Sims franchise via Sims 4 and had to leave EA for it#so he really is about to be on his 3rd company if we dont get him for it this time#cause the dude is clearly committing fraud or at least insider trading#patrick bateman#patrick bateman business card
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thinking about the whole "do you want a deal with the devil/what am i gonna do with a soul anyways"-conversation between tom and greg in all the bells say and like. screaming over how quickly the abuse seeps in and corrupts everyone in this fucking family.
so it works like this: tom takes shit from logan and shiv, so he learns how to take it out on his employees and on greg. the little midwestern boy becomes cruel. but greg is still the unspoiled outsider, who hasn't learned how to hurt others yet. so to tom has to be both cruel and kind to greg. cruel because passing on the abuse is how you survive in this family, and kind, because no matter how much tom closes off his heart, he is still hungering for a smidgen of kindness - and he sees so much of himself in greg, that by being kind to him, he is staving off that hunger in himself just a little. and maybe even using it to convince himself that he's still a good person.
so tom offers to look out for greg, and brings him with him on the gojo deal. they're gonna go to the bottom of the top together! they're gonna get their slice of the pie, together. who has ever looked out for you in this fucking family? the answer is no one, doesn't matter if you're asking greg or tom.
how tragic then, that by showing him this misunderstood kindness, tom is killing greg. he is looping him into the cycle of abuse, and dooming greg to become tom, someone capable of cruelty. how tragic, that the only way greg is able to conceive of this new rise in status, this jump up the ladder, is through the roles of the abusive dynamics.
"can i have...?"
"your own greg? you can have 20"
it's funny, because greg is fucking stupid, but heartbreaking, because his first thought when met with the possibility of a rise in power, is to ask "do i get my own person to abuse?" even through tom's attempts at kindness, it's already too late. tom has already taught greg that the ones who are in power are cruel to the ones who are not, and if you are without power, you take that cruelty, and you hold it, and you wait until the day you have power, so you can pass it on.
even if tom didn't cut greg in on the deal, greg had already taken that lesson to heart. but by bringing greg with him, tom is metaphorically killing the last pathetic smidgens of greg's innocence, and dooming him to become the abuser.
#i know we want to see them leave the company and thrive together#but i fear the worst#i dont think greg will end up becoming someone tom hates - i think he will end up becoming someone tom FEARS#i see no scenario where tom and greg walk away together#but i see the possibility of tom leaving everything behind on his own#after realizing that he has turned his only real friend into someone capable of hurting him#i think that could make tom walk away#because more than any other character tom still clings to the idea of real human connection#and i think that he might realize that as long as he participates in the cycle of abuse that is completely unobtainable#because becoming close to someone means looping them into the cycle#and yeah i think if he realizes that he MIGHT walk away#or he will give up on love. and just become logan.#tomgreg#succession
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