#leave more space for merthur ;)

[merlin-slut]

all the different arthurian legend related books ive read

so these are just books ive read that are either based in on the original stories or reincarnation related!! i have no ranking system so this is just based on vibes and is mostly in the order of when i read them, with the most recent at the top (except for the mary stewart series but im just very passionate about it lmao)

The Arthurian Saga by Mary Stewart: SO GOOD i loved it so much it was amazing HIGHLY recommend!!! it was more historically based and is so so so so so well done!! i read this about a year ago and im already thinking of rereading it!! the first book, the crystal cave, focuses on merlin growing up and learning about his visions! it covers up until arthur being conceived. it was SO GOOD and i desperately want to watch the cursed looking tv show based off of it!!

The Once and Future King by T.H. White (this included the Book of Merlyn): there was something about this i didnt quite vibe with. like i mean it was pretty good until the book of merlyn so maybe just skip that and leave it incomplete lmao definitely had more of the whimsical vibe attached to the legends, as its what the disney the sword in the stone is based off of. so, i would say it was only so-so for me

The Other Merlin by Robyn Schneider: okay so i was tricked into reading this by tiktok because i saw the author saying it was waaaaaaaaaay more gay than it was and very merthur inspired and please dont read it if you think thats the case. it does have some interesting concepts about sexism in magic (though not entirely in the way you think) and focuses on the merlin you're thinking of's children. it was alright on its own, as long as you separate it out from bbc Merlin. the advertising of the book skewed my perception about what it would be. so yeah, its not the best but its still a fun story!

Camelot Rising series by Kiersten White: ooooooooo these ones were fun!! its told from Guinevere's point of view but it isn't actually Guinevere!! she's a changeling who was sent to Camelot to marry Arthur and was told she would be his protector from something working to destroy what he was building! it was interesting and so fun to be in guinevere's mind while she tried to figure out who she is and what is trying to destroy camelot!! so fun!!

The Dragon's Call by Simon Forward: honestly no notes! so fun! its a retelling of episode 1 with some added details!!!! excellenttttttttttt

Gwen and Art Aren't in Love by Lex Croucher: ooooooo this one was fun too!! and is actually queer as advertised!!! so gwen and art HATE each other until they discover that they're both gay and decide on an alliance to help each other out and protect themselves!! so yes!!! actually gay!!!!! however i do think so bits were a bit slow and so it def couldve been paced a lot better but overall, wasnt bad!

Potions and Poison by Jacqueline Rayner: again another book thats a retelling of the show!!! it covered s1 e3 and 4! and is part of the younger readers collection so it def was written for young audience but it had some full illustrations and was still fun to read!!!

Once & Future by Amy Rose Capetta and Cory McCarthy: sooooooo I read book 1 but have not read the sequel! its set in space, in the future, and Ari is the 42nd reincarnation of King Arthur. so yeah, its a little different lmao. this one is also fun with ari discovering who she is, both as a reincarnation of king arthur, and with her queer identity! she meets a teen merlin, who, like in white's the once and future king, is aging in reverse, so it creates some fun dynamics! I read this one over a year ago so the details are a little fuzzy but i remember liking it, although some bits were slightly confusing i think??? i remember them trying to take down an evil government and ari being an illegal immigrant! so maybe i should reread this and then read book two?????

Avalon High by Meg Cabot: so yeah this is what that dcom is based off of but the book is pretty different!! i feel like the book is more stereotypical in the way arthurian legend retellings go, especially compared to the movie! still it was a fun and very fast read!! very like YA style book though, but its meg cabot so its to be expected and very much a 2005 book!

i think this is all of them???????? but im going to list what's on my tbr and if yall have an recs PLEASE send them my way!!!

the rest of the bbc merlin episode retellings

le morte d'arthur by thomas malory

bliss and blunder by victoria gosling

sir gawain and the green knight (are there any specific version recs???)

the fall of arthur by j.r.r. tolkien

[gd-dollopole]

Hey GD!

I just wanted to say thanks for reblogging my post the other day about my first merthur fic - it really means a lot coming from someone who posted a huge fic in the community. I couldn't believe it when I saw you were the same author and still reblogged my little oneshot link.

By the way, I've saved your fic and I'm starting chapter 2 but it's awesome so far!!

Hey, Zaramel!

First thing first, you’re welcome!!! That’s what fandom and community mean to me: supporting each other/helping each other out.

I’m always a sucker for a one shot fic with nightmares and hurt/comfort, so that was a wonderful little read, great way to start your path in the BBC Merlin/Merthur fandom.

Second thing, I’ve been in a very awful and difficult mind space as of lately, but it’s small things like this that keep me going, that make me believe in me and in what I write.

Thank you so much, from the bottom of my heart, for leaving me a message and letting me know, for taking the time to read my fanfiction, and for loving it too.

Sometimes, I do believe I’m a good writer, others, I wonder if I really am, when I’m not capable of putting into words how grateful I am for your message!

That’s why I write.

Never in one million years I would have thought to receive recognition for my work, or for someone to even read just one sentence of what I write, so imagine my stupor when people began leaving comments and kudos under a fic that I still have no idea people can like!!! I simply write because I love it and because of people/other writers like you :)! I hope you’ll never stop writing and that you’ll be passionate about what you do for all the years to come.

In case anyone would like to give a read to zaramel23 fic, check out their post here (give it some love) and their work here:

“Open Eyes Can See My Love” by ZaraMelMercury, on Ao3!

(give it even more love).

Have a great day🤍!

[merlinrarepairfest]

Rules & Requirements

How Does This Work?

The Merlin Rare Pair Fest is a fandom event hoping to celebrate the various rarer pairings in the BBC Merlin fandom. We will count anything that is not Merlin/Arthur (romantic) or Merlin & Arthur (platonic) as a rare pair/rare gen relationship. We are aware that there are some ships that have a considerable number of fanworks on AO3. Many of those come from being secondary pairings in otherwise Merthur-centric fics, though, so we decided against filtering this out. 

That said, Poly-ships that include both of them are welcome. 

This is no moral statement on Merthur as a ship or dynamic, and we will kindly ask people to refrain from ship-bashing of any kind. 

During the prompting period, anyone will be able to leave up to ten prompts (you do not need to create for the fest to do so). The form shared once prompting opens will ask you for a ship/gen relationship, and a prompt - this can be as loose or as specific as you’d like it to be. (For example, you can simply prompt “Morgana/Gwen, Soulmates” or “Elyan/Gwaine, during a standard patrol they get captured by enemies and need to work together to get out again. During this, they’ll finally have to face that pining that they have both been building a forest with over the last few months.”)  

Once prompting closes, we will compile a prompt list for people to go through.

When claiming opens, creators can claim a prompt to create for. This works on a first come/first serve basis, and each prompt can be claimed once for fic, and once for art (any medium). 

You can claim one prompt only. If you finish before the deadline, you’re welcome to claim another one, though!

As this is not an exchange, there will be no likes/dislikes section on the prompting form, and it is left up to creators how closely (or not) they will stick to a prompt. 

That said, prompters will have the option to leave their username when prompting, and creators are welcome to gift the finished work to their prompter, provided they did stick relatively closely to the original prompt! 

You’re also welcome to self-prompt - you will not need to leave that prompt, then aim to claim it! There will be space on the claiming/sign-up form to indicate this. That said, you do still need to sign up. 

As artists, gif-makers, and otherwise non-traditional art mediums tend to fall to the wayside during fests of this format, a Rare Pair Week will be held on tumblr aimed specifically at you before posting starts! You can find more info on that here. 

Rules & Requirements:

You may create for any rating or genre; there are no content restrictions, as long as you adhere to AO3’s rules and tagging requirements.

When claiming rolls around, please make sure to sign up with an email address that you check regularly!

It should go without saying, but plagiarism will result in your ban from this and any future fests run by us. We consider both AI Art and Stories to fall into this category.

If you are under the age of 18, you will not be allowed to create explicit content for this fest.

There will be a Discord Channel for this Fest in the Merlin Fic Book Club (15+). You can join here, we’d love to have you! 

This fest operates firmly under the premises of ‘don’t like; don’t read,’ ‘ship and let ship’ and ‘your kink is not my kink but that’s okay’ (if you’re unfamiliar with these concepts, see this post). We will not tolerate any shaming, harassment, or attempts to police content, and if you are found to participate in such behaviour, you will be banned from the fest permanently.

Requirements:

Stories must be at least 500 words. There is no maximum wordcount.

Each Story must be complete and entirely your own. You cannot submit a WIP, but if you want to continue your story in the future, you are of course welcome to do so. For the fest there needs to be a proper ending, though.

Stories have to be posted in full, whether they are multi-chaptered or not, on your posting date.

You’re welcome to collaborate! Just let us know your co-author when you sign up.

We advise you to get a Beta. If you don’t know where to find one, you can ask us and we will try to set you up with someone!

We welcome any art mediums apart from stories! While there will be a Rare Pair Week held to encourage artistic creations as stated here, any artists are more than welcome to take part in the claiming process and subsequent posting period! 

Art can be any form or medium, and as long as you consider it a complete work, we’re not going to tell you that it isn’t.

All fics must be posted to the AO3 Collection. The collection will be moderated, and the works released by us during the posting period. If you don’t know how to do this, feel free to ask us.

You are welcome to cross-post with other fests like the Merlin Bingo, Merlin Tavern Tales, the Mini Challenges of MFBC etc.

If you have any further questions, please don’t hesitate to reach out to us through asks on this blog, through the channel in the linked Discord Server, or through email at bbcmerlinrarepairfest@gmail.com

[zelzebee]

I have too many ideas banging around in here

Current WIPs:

— *currently unnamed*, Twilight college AU/ rewrite: this story has been forming in my head for like two years, and it’s my goal to finally release it at some point this year, idonno. I’m having a hard time actually writing the chapters even though the story is re-plotted in it’s entirety in my head.

— A Constellation of Lovers, ATLA Sokka/ Zuko fic: this is the cutest, most sickening little love story between my OTP forever, Zuko and Sokka. It’s mainly about how love is difficult to maintain and takes work, and also leans heavily on ideas of relationship anarchy—their friendships are as important as any other relationship. I’ve done quite a bit a work on this one and hit a block about seven months ago so I put it down for a while. But I think I may be ready to work on it some more soon.

— *book one in unnamed fantasy romance series about shifters: this is my main current work; it’s a lesbian/ queer romance with found family, enemies to lovers vibes and a sh*t ton of fantasy worldbuilding. There’s mystery, there’s wholesome character building, there’s smut. This story just simply will not stop taking up all the space in my brain.

— for a brief time we are all alive, sci-fi fantasy about re-incarnation: I don’t have a lot to say about this one except that it’s weird, it’s a very slow going work, and I’m not sure it will ever be seen by someone else’s eyes

—(camelot doesn’t have a) Queen, short Merthur fic for a friend: about ten months ago my friend went on the search for the perfect Merlin/ Arthur fixit fic, and upon not finding it, described it to me in great detail; so I wrote down the bones and just need to fill it out some. This is one of those fun fics where every chapter title is a song title and the whole fic goes along with an album. I’ll leave you to guess who the music artist is for this one.

—Intressori, a story about a magic college in space, a magic space college: this story (series of stories really) was inspired by a deep hatred for a certain series about a magical place of learning. This story is dedicated first and foremost to my trans siblings everywhere, because we deserve loving representation and safe spaces to escape to in stories. ANYWAYS—seven young magic practicioners are accepted to Intressori College where they will compete with each other, laugh with each other, fall for each other, and forge bonds that will stretch the dimensions of time and space.

[iamafictionfreak]

Hello, hello!!!

So… it’s been a while. I know I promised/offered/hoped for more of this. And... even though it’s been months, I've finally managed to write the next part.

Not to be deceiving, but part 2 is literally episode 2 only. I'm going the way of Loaded march and posting oneshot's with a rough length of about 20, 000 words? Give or take 5000.

Ever read Footloose’s Loaded March? The Merthur fic to end all Merthur fics?

For those here who aren’t Merthur veterans – we hold weekend group therapy sessions, and depression Thursdays – Loaded March is a series of stories (16 in all) amounting to 1,261,720 words, which is mind boggling to me, and each story is never more than either a oneshot or a handful of chapters until you reach the end.

So, I’m doing that here. Highest form of flattery there is.

So, yep. Part 2 is written and it's around 20000 words - Once it's edited I'll upload, very hopeful for a release by New year. Each episode will be the equivalent of a mini arc but it'll likely be a while before part 3 etc.

As with the above post, I’m aiming, if I actually manage to get there, to cover the rest of season 1 and leave it in a good place. It’s basically a retelling of the show, except with Arthur knowing Merlin’s secret, which changes everything. The juicy part is how this is investigated, developed and how it may or may not alter events as these two idiots progress.

Forewarning: don’t expect a light and fluffy time. Yes, I’m hoping it will be humorous. It’ll likely be dark at times, angsty. Painful. But the light is the key, and the relationship between Arthur and Merlin, the core. It’s, hopefully (pleasepleaseplease) full of adventure and truth and fun!

Unfortunately, Arthur, as you’ve seen, won’t immediately be buddy buddy with the personification of ‘evil’ that his father has raised him to want to destroy. We have a trained killer with a nobility made of steel and a heart as fragile as a bird’s. We have a soft and squishy peasant boy beholding the world's heart of gold, a primal gaze who is an unforeseen powerhouse with unlimited potential to grow into the most formidable man on the planet.

In the show, we see Merlin change over time, moving from servant to devotee of Arthur but kept very much isolated and shadowed. It leads to a very bittersweet end and a deeply fearful Merlin who should never have had to be. With said man knowing the truth, how does that change this growth. I’m not a fan of unearned progression so please don’t expect these two to become the best of friends in the space of 2 chapters.

In the show they fit all the definitions yet fit exactly none of them. They’re friends, except they’re not because their social status gets in the way. They’re devoted comrades, except they’re not because how can they be when such huge secrets stand between them. They’re each other’s protector, except neither really knew it nor understood what it meant. Arthur became Merlin’s purpose, and no one ever knew that heartbreakingly beautiful truth, so he couldn’t serve said purpose to his fullest potential. Arthur was never able to know what it was like to have someone like that by his side because even when he married Gwen, there was a piece if himself that he kept concealed. Watch season 5 and you’ll see what I mean and it’s because of that, that Gwen feels so alone at times.

The show held such potential. And luckily fan works aren’t limited by money or stereotypes or backwards thinking or, oddly enough, a yearning to thrown in a boatload of realism in the last half hour of a supremely unrealistic show.

This fic will not be halted or forced or rushed into romance of any kind. I have an issue with unearned progression. Natural chemistry leads to places yes, but people don't usually just fall in love and go with the flow.

The possibilities are delicious, won’t lie. If Arthur and Merlin had been allowed to ‘touch that’ in the show, the depth of it - the many layers it would have added - would have taken it in a very different direction, one that didn’t fit BBC goals at the time. Imagine all the S1/2 episodes with a bi Arthur. How that alone changes everything about it. Likewise, rewatch the episodes and imagine that it circles certain forbidden feelings and suddenly it’s so much more. I also won’t destroy existing love angles for the sake of something that I want more. No, it needs to feel natural. We’ll see what happens.

If you have questions, throw them at me, whether I answer them is another thing entirely.

I hope you’re all okay at the very least. It’s been a tough few years.

P.S I was going to wait until the third part was written as well, but the year has been hard; I've been sick, I've gotten a new far more stressful job and I've begun it question whether we really do exist within a 'matrix', so it feels right to post a sequel at christmas when merlin did everything to kill us once upon a time.

*not my gif*

In a Land of Christmas, and a Time of Fanfiction, There was an Irritated Woman in Dire Need of a Re-Write:

(gifs not mine - they're from @genyakosstyk)

So… I did it! I did exactly what I said I’d do here. I wrote the start of what could become a long-winded piece of diatribe focusing on how much Merlin the tv series could have healed us instead of hurt us.

I can’t tell if I’m overly ambitious, a little desperate (about anything and everything honestly) or just so done with 2023 and the crap-tastic news it generates. That and, I have this on repeat in my mental-space, which is more of a shed than a palace:

(gif from @punqueen13 )

So that's fun.

It’s forgivable to escape horror or fear or fatigue or guilt and grief by diving into fantasy. And is there anything more fantastical than merlin? Merlin and all the promise it brings. Is there any wonder why fics are still being churned out for a series that ended 11 years ago?

So here it is.

Part 1 of one. I’ve written a short, five chapter thing. It isn’t a prologue, it’s an intermission between episode 1 and 2 of season 1. The chapters are short for a reason, but I wanted to give a mix of both Arthur and Merlin povs so do let me know if they’re extremely out of character – I can handle a little ooc, especially given the nature of fanfic but if I can’t hear their voices in my head or see them as I read, I feel like I’ve failed.

I think I did ok?

The premise is simple:

Arthur sees Merlin, a peasant he had a brief altercation with, use magic to save his life. He should tell his father about. He should arrest Merlin.

He doesn’t. His honour being at risk, he allows Merlin to work for him on the proviso that he doesn’t use magic. Ever.

Except Arthur has questions he’s never been given the answers to. And Merlin is – odd. He’s nothing like what Arthur’s been told a sorcerer is and he makes it all too easy for Arthur to drop his guard around him.

Which- well, it must be magic, right?

His father, his attendants and tutors, have taught him about the manipulations of witchcraft and sorcery and how they can twist a man into feeling empathy for the wicked.

The problem is that Merlin isn’t exactly what he’d call wicked. Arthur trusts his own instincts and they’re telling him very different things to what the king decreed. He vows to watch over his new manservant. The moment he commits treason, he’ll run a sword through him.

And in the meantime, maybe – just maybe – he’ll find out for himself if a man who turns to evil, can’t turn back.

I’LL POST EACH CHAPTER WITHIN THE NEXT TWO WEEK SEASONAL PERIOD.

But.

There will then be a wait for part 2 – if anyone truly wants it, that is. And if not, hey. I had fun writing this.

Other bits and bobs and odds and sods:

Will there be romance?

Eventually! But I do wonder with who you mean? And this is first and foremost an experiment about how Merlin and Arthur could have been if what when how and why. If Arthur had Merlin's full trust and if Merlin was allowed past the walls Arthur had erected to keep even Gwen out, what could they have become?

Is it funny?

I HAVE NO IDEA. I truly hope so though, at east a little. There's some seriousness ahead to get through first though, Arthur isn't just going to jump into trust.

Will there be a lot of differences from season 1?

I aiming for exactly that.

How much trouble is Merlin in? More than season 1?

Ahem, have you seen the below man?

Merlin's in ALL the trouble. He just doesn't know yet that trouble is his home-spice.

[hall-of-merlin2]

Magic, Monsters and Merthur - 1x03 - (Merthur)

I see what the people want, I give the people what they want.

Loads, loads, and holy fuck how much character content can there be in one episode???!!!

A lot.

A whole frickin lot.

<_><_><_>

“Dad? her’es your sandwich.”

“Mmm, what’s in it?”

“It’s smoked pigeon, but I’d say there’s more smoke than pigeon.”

***

“And I’ve done you some watercress soup tonight.”

“Don’t tell me... With more water in it than cress?”

03:02

This is just… This is so frickin’ adorable. They’re both cuties, and I will declare now that “cutie” is the highest praise a character can get.

A new list is born, except we’re not comparing Cuties, we’re just all getting mushy over them.

<_><_><_>

03:45

AWH!

This is such obvious flirting! Even more obvious than Arthur and Merlin, I daresay, but then it went nowhere because someone suddenly realized that Gwen needed to end up with Arthur. I wish whoever it was that they didn’t.

(JUST LOOK AT THEIR SMILES THEY’RE SO FRICKING ADORABLE)

<_><_><_>

04:10

Okay, so I’m not the biggest Morgwen shipper, but…

Come on! This really is sweet!

(And can you blame Morgana for falling for Gwen? Just look at that Cutie’s smile!)

<_><_><_>

04:40

And on the flipside we have Arthur “I’ll come all the way out to this tower that’s directly opposite everything else just to give you a message by myself and not let another servant or guard do it for me” Pendragon.

Both Pendragons really are completely gone for their servants.

<_><_><_>

04:48

I like Gaius’ face though.

He looks like he’s one second away from shaking his head and looking at Merlin in that look that’s just so exasperated at Merlin taking everyone’s hearts on his first week.

<_><_><_>

05:02

Gaius: Has a point.

Merlin: :O

Merlin: >:(

<_><_><_>

05:08

YA’LL WANNA TALK ABOUT SOMEONE ICONIC-

<_><_><_>

“But not all magic is bad. I know it isn’t!”

“It’s neither good nor bad. It’s how you use it.”

07:50

The first version of the “Evil lies in the hearts of men” line.

So, once again, YA’LL WANNA TALK ABOUT SOMEONE ICONIC-

<_><_><_>

08:40

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-

-aaaaaaaaa, nah. It’s just Arthur getting back at Merlin for “Being late”.

What a different episode THAT would have been…

<_><_><_>

09:38

Arthur uses a snappy tone.

(Almost an accusation.)

But Gaius is having none of it.

And Arthur immediately SITS THE FUCK DOWN.

God, imagine how Arthur would have turned out if Gaius wasn’t there to “occasionally” remind Arthur that he will not be taking his shit and he can get off that pedestal now.

YA’LL WANNA TALK ABOUT SOMEONE ICONIC-

Okay okay I’m gonna stop.

Gaius has earned the Cutie award.

Welcome to the big leagues!

<_><_><_>

Are you mad? Merlin, your life’s destined for more important things.

But what if I don’t practice, then how will I get to be this… Great Warlock?!

There will come a time when your skills will be recognized.

*Frustrated noises* When?! How long do I have to wait?!

Patience is a virtue, Merlin.

Oh sitting by and doing nothing, that’s a virtue?

*Raises ladle* Your time. Will come.

I point this out a few episodes later, but this is the real difference between Gaius and Kilgharrah.

Both of their goals are to get Merlin to fulfill “his destiny”. Kilgharrah may know more of what his “destiny” actually is, but Gaius has no clue. He truly has no reason to believe that Merlin is “one side of a coin” or that Arthur is important in his “destiny”, he just sees how powerful Merlin is.

He also sees just how eager Merlin is to use his magic. How he understands the more complex concepts of magic and knows how to use it, and has quite the moral compass, that Merlin is actually prepared for “his destiny” or “doing good”, but he also sees what a hothead Merlin is, how quickly he jumps from one thought to another, how little he thinks at all once he gets something into his head. Gaius knows that whatever Merlin’s “destiny” is, he could probably handle it with what he’s already taught him, but he also knows that this thing is not “it”. And realizing that Merlin still has to wait, knowing how disinterested he actually is in that, he tries to get Merlin to power through this time. He tries to instill this “hope” into him, that he will be great, that he will be free, that he will be fine and that he just has to endure, and not kill everybody along the way.

The intent is good. And I think Merlin realizes this later, but at this stage, Merlin is still not used to sitting still. I don’t think he ever is, he’s just become more clever about it.

Also… Please enjoy yet another perfectly timed screencap.

He look happy.

<_><_><_>

What’s different about this victim?

Uh… She’s a woman!

…

Sometimes I do wonder if your magical talents were given to the right person.

12:10

Gaius is so fuckin done XD

Ahhh okay. Gaius gets the Snarky Cutie award. This will be competed for, let’s see who holds it the longest.

<_><_><_>

So what’s the thing they do share?

Uh… Water.

*Encouraging pen pointing*

Water. You think the disease is spread through water!

Merlin. You’re a prodigy.

12:45

Yeah… Gaius is keeping this award for a long time.

<_><_><_>

17:19

Oh… Oh my poor Merlin… My poor boy is reminded that he has no father to hug :(

Is that one of the reasons he acted so impulsively? Besides the obvious one, that he loves Gwen – but did Merlin cure Gwen’s father because he didn’t want Gwen to live without one, like he has?

Oh… Oh…

Oh my sweet precious sunshine, my heart just shattered.

MERLIN RECEIVES THE SELFLESS CUTIE AWARD. I DON’T THINK ANYONE WILL TAKE IT OFF HIM.

<_><_><_>

18:55

EPISODE 3 MAGIC REVEAL – THE DUO OF MERLIN AND GWEN, FUCKING SHIT UP SINCE MERLIN DECIDED TO COME TO CAMELOT.

WE DESERVED THIS.

“I’m psychic.”

*laughing* “No you’re not.”

“It’s true!”

“Alright, what am I thinking?”

“That I’m not psychic.”

*laughter* “You’re strange...

“I don’t mean that in a nasty way!

“You’re just... Funny.

“I like that.”

MY FUCKIN HEART.

THEY ARE BOTH SO ADORABLE!!!

THIS IS SO BLATANTLY OBVIOUS!

CUTIES OF THE HIGHEST CALIBER. THE ADORABLE CUTIES. THE MOST ADORABLE CUTIES TO EVER EXIST.

OH REALLY.

*loud screeching in the distance*

*sound of glass shattering*

NO THAT WAS MY HEART WHY DID YOU TAKE IT!

I MEAN CONGRATS YOU NOW HAVE IT! ARE YOU HAPPY?

I AM!

CUTIES!

<_><_><_>

“It’s too late. They think Gwen’s a sorceress, they think she caused the disease.”

“But she didn’t!”

22:25

By any means fucking necessary.

<_><_><_>

“I have seen the way the girl works. Her fingers are worn, her nails are broken.

“If she was a sorceress, why would she do this?!

“Why would she kneel on a cold stone floor morning after morning, when she could make these things happen with the snap of her fingers?

“Like an idle king.”

“You have no right!…”

“But you have the right to cast a judgment-!”

“I have a responsibility to take care of this kingdom!”

…

“I take no pleasure in this.” (AS FUCKING IF)

“But you are sentencing the wrong person!”

“She’s right, Father. You hear the word ‘magic’ and you no longer listen.”

“You saw it for yourself, she used enchantments.”

“Yes!… Maybe. But to save her dying father! That doesn’t make her guilty of creating a plague.

“One’s the act of kindness, of love, the other of evil – I don’t believe evil’s in this girl’s heart.”

“I have witnessed what witchcraft can do. I’ve suffered at its hand. I cannot take that chance.

If there is the slightest doubt about this girl she must die or the whole kingdom may perish.”

“I understand that…”

“One day you may become king… Then you will understand – such decisions must be made. There are dark forces that threaten this kingdom.”

“I know witchcraft is an evil, Father, so is injustice!”

24:25

God, Morgana and Arthur uniting against Uther for Gwen and Uther just ignoring what they’re saying and repeating the same “mAgIC iS eViL hUr DuR” bullshit.

Uther should have died sooner.

Like… this episode.

Morgana should have just snapped.

<_><_><_>

27:25

Gwen the martyr.

I can already imagine it. People at the execution whispering among themselves “She’s a witch?” “No way! She’s so kind!” “Rumors say she’s not.” “She’s not! It’s just the King again.” “But if she’s innocent, why?” “He’ll burn a frog if he thought it would help.” “That’s dumb. She doesn’t deserve to die!” “No, she does not.”

I can imagine everyone looking away, quietly letting their anger build up, but unable or not courageous enough to save her. I can imagine the people whispering to themselves when the guards are out of earshot, about how “The king is out of control”, “Her death stopped nothing!” and more. How that anger they thought they buried flares up. How it seeps through the cracks they left. How it makes them draw a knife, and plunge it into a guard’s neck. How if they felt guilty, everyone who called them a hero say that was one of Them who stood by and watched it. How that anger forms a community, how it brings people together. How the first time the chopping block is being assembled after Gwen’s death, people start talking. Who’s dying, for what reason…

How can they stop it?

A direct assault? A stealthy escape? An infiltration into the guard ranks? Maybe torches? Make bombs?

Anyone here know magic?

Oh, you do! That’s great.

Let’s kill the king.

As amazing as this sounds, Gwen would have had to die. One of the Adorable Cutie Award holders.

I will not condone that.

<_><_><_>

28:40

Do you think Arthur’s so convinced Merlin can’t have done it because of what happened with Valiant, Merlin exposing a sorcerer, therefore his own kin if this were true? Or because, as Morgana said about Gwen

“Why would she kneel on a cold stone floor morning after morning, when she could make these things happen with the snap of her fingers?”

Or because Arthur likes him just a little bit?

I think we all know what we want to believe.

<_><_><_>

“He’s in love.”

“...What?”

“With Gwen!”

“I am- not!”

“Yes you are.”

“No way-”

29:03

Oh boys…

<_><_><_>

“...Arthur’s not going to find it. He thinks he is… so sharp. But even when I told him I was a wizard – he still couldn’t see it.”

30:14

I don’t think Arthur noticing or not has anything to do with his intelligence, Merlin, just whether or not he’d like to see you burn :)

Also, Gaius.

“Sometimes it’s pretty hard to spot.”

“Maybe I should go around wearing a pointy hat.”

“I don’t think you’d find one big enough.”

That Award crown is staying firmly planted on his head.

<_><_><_>

32:16

Nope.

<_><_><_>

“We need to destroy [the afanc], then the plague will stop and Uther... may see sense.”

“And that’s why you need Arthur.”

“He’s our best chance.”

“But he won’t want to disobey the king.”

“Leave that to me.”

36:07

Morgana receives the Scheming Cutie Award! My girl knows what buttons to push to get men to listen to her and I think that’s very sexy of her.

<_><_><_>

36:35

Okay, both of these Cuties receive the True Sibling Cutie Awards. I don’t think there is anyone who can take their crown from them, unless…

The True part only means how accurately sibling dynamics are portrayed. Which opens up place for at least some competition!

Hahah! No one gets to have their Award forever.

(But everyone has permanent Cutie status.)

<_><_><_>

37:33

!!!

TRUST!!!

!!!

Merlin said what sounded like something made up, like he always does, but Arthur still goes in because he believes him!

(Yes yes Morgana’s influence may be there, like ‘Oh so you’re chickening out?’, but I THINK ONLY IN MERTHUR.

And I do that because it’s very scarce in this particular ep.)

<_><_><_>

38:01

I love this and all, but I can already think of a better way for Morgana to tell Arthur to stop being sexist.

Just pull out a fuckin sword.

Like… literally. Just from her dress. A knife maybe, but one that doesn’t look like it’s for a kid, a serious dagger that she could stab you with 50 times before you collapse from blood loss.

That’s a… Compliment to her swiftness, not… Not a comment on the dullness of the knife.

Morgana with a sword please!!!

<_><_><_>

43:19

Ah, the cop-out. The writers have committed a robbery.

(I do have to say that it is a masterful manipulation of our feelings. The first and then second episode was all about Merlin dealing with having magic and where to use it, trying to figure out his purpose and whatnot, and very strict repeats of “Do not let anyone else know, you will die”. There’s a reason Uther’s introduction is him killing an innocent sorcerer, and why Morgana is so angry at him about it. It’s establishing that Merlin revealing his magic to someone is a big deal, and it kind of is, so when we get cop-outs like these, we are dissatisfied, because Merlin revealing his magic is a positive thing, and we didn’t get this positive thing, so we are sad. And because this was hinted at, and we were already thinking of how it would look like, and we still do with the fics and stuff, we start to crave Merlin revealing his magic to those people that it was hinted at. To finally get that positive thing – that positive emotion.

This is probably more relevant when Lancelot comes by, since him being so casual about Merlin’s magic is yet more manipulation – it was only a possibility that Merlin revealing his magic is a positive, now it’s confirmed, and Lancelot becomes one of our favorite characters because of this positive thing attributed to him.

I can’t say it’s evil manipulation though, since first impressions do matter and every writer has this dilemma of how to introduce a character to associate some sort of emotion you want to invoke in people when they see them. Introductions are important, and we love or hate characters based on them, at least until learning more about them and then strengthening/changing our opinions of them. That’s why consistency is important, cause if it’s too far from the first impression, it feels odd and takes you out of the story and once you’re out of the story you start looking for more things to take you out and then you just start to hate that thing, and if someone has changed/strengthened their opinion because of one interaction, and then after that interaction the character doesn’t act like how that someone now perceives them, it also breaks the immersion and makes you question whether the writer knows what they’re doing.

I don’t… I don’t know why I’m writing this. I guess… writing theory? Stuff I noticed while writing/analyzing stuff so I could write better? Uh… Anyway.)

THE CHAOS OF THE TRIO OF GWEN MERLIN AND MORGANA WOULD HAVE BEEN GOLDEN. IT WOULD HAVE BEEN ENOUGH TO DESTROY CAMELOT, OR UPROOT THE MONARCHY AND ESTABLISH A DEMOCRACY!

…

It would have been FUN.

(And I’m not gonna get into how the ‘fun’ factor of a show/movie/book contributes to its re-readability and overall positive opinion more than the ‘angst’ or ‘drama’ or ‘depressive’ factors do. That’s… Meh. It’s also something I noticed while writing/analyzing stuff so I could write better. I could get into it, but I just want to finish this episode and go to sleep.)

<_><_><_>

“I hope you didn’t come to her attention.”

“Doubt it.

*Glare*

“Well no one else seems to appreciate my skills! I just want someone to see me for who I am.”

43:52

Case in point…

It really hammers home this idea in the first few episodes. And it makes it incredibly easy to understand Merlin’s motivations in the later episodes.

He just wants to be himself.

<_><_><_>

The Cutie Awards!

(First Holders of an Award Receive an Extra 2 Points Towards Their Score)

(Also everyone can have every single award at a time, it depends on what they do in the episode. At the end of a season, the one who has the most points in one award will be the winner of that award. If everyone gets to be an Adorable Cutie in one ep, it’ll even out the odds ;))

Gaius – The Snarky Cutie (3)

Guinevere – The Adorable Cutie (3)

Tom – The Adorable Cutie (3)

Arthur – The True Sibling Cutie (3)

Morgana – The Scheming Cutie (3), The True Sibling Cutie (3)

Merlin – The Selfless Cutie(3), The Adorable Cutie(3)

<_><_><_>

The episode starts with Nimueh summoning her little afanc beast in an egg with a ton of her own marks on it just so everyone knows who did it. Not very smart. It ends with Gaius reiterating the same “you’re an idiot” thing to Merlin, when the real idiot is in fact Morgana, who didn’t hear that Merlin nearly shouted a whole spell in a compact cave with echo. Camelot is the home of the once and future dumbasses.

<_><_><_>

The Magic

The Monsters

[mumble-muse]

✨Non-Merthur Merlin Server AO3 Takeover!✨

We asked our amazing members to publish a drabble or short fanwork with one simple rule: it couldn't be Merthur.

And they did such an amazing job 😭

(please check full tags for warnings)

a kind of grief by @sirwilliamofdeira

Elyan & Gwaine

"the extra shadow brightens everything" Elyan and Gwaine in the cell s04ep13, dealing with the stress of imprisonment the best they can

bound in purple by @mumble-muse

Gwen/Merlin

Merlin and Gwen share a moment.

Different Kind of Knight by @lemissingmask

Arthur/Lancelot

Arthur gets an unexpected passenger on his drive home

Guilt is a form of hurt by @gremlinbehaviour

Lancelot & Merlin, Gwen & Lancelot, Arthur/Gwen

Lancelot saves Gwen from an assassin, but in doing so hurts her and her unborn baby as well as being injured himself. As Merlin sews him up, he tries to assuage his guilt with little success

Height differences by @gremlinbehaviour

Gwen & Percival

After the castle is reclaimed from Morgana and her immortal army, Percival needs help finding his way around. Unfortunately, some of the routes that work for Gwen aren't as useful for the tall new knight

kiss (noun): an exercise in avoidance by @gwen-cheers-me-up

Lancelot/Merlin

but maybe it's an exercise in hope?

Lancelot vs Lancelot by @gremlinbehaviour

Merlin, Gwaine, Lancelot

Living on in a torn apart world by @donttouchtheneednoggle

Gwen & Percival

Percival comforts Gwen after a nightmare and they talk about Elyan

No man he'd rather have beside him in a battle by @erdariel

Elyan & Leon

Arthur knights Elyan. Leon is proud.

on frogs and friends by @sirwilliamofdeira

Elena & Leon

Leon and Elena talk before her wedding. Set just after Grunhilda leaves Elena in s03e06, but before Merlin and Gaius get there!

Post-concussion cuddles by @gremlinbehaviour

Gwen/Lancelot

Sequel to Uncaged in Your Arms. Gwen and Lancelot are safely back in Camelot, but both injured, they're instructed to rest. This is improved greatly by doing so together.

Stairs by @gremlinbehaviour

Elyan & Gwaine

The Big Three of BBC Merlin by @mergwencelot

Gwen/Lancelot/Merlin

The Inn above the Tavern by @gremlinbehaviour

Gwaine & Gwen & Lancelot

When Gwaine runs into Lancelot and Guinevere outside of Camelot, it's not under the best of circumstances, but he's happy to see them again nonetheless and to be of service.

we left the book of love signed in blood on every page by @lit-in-thy-heart

Gwaine/Lancelot/Merlin, Gwaine/Merlin

After Lancelot walked through the veil, his partners are left to piece what remains of their lives back together. But they have both come to realise that perhaps the best way to do that is alone.

Will you stay? by @erdariel

Leon & Merlin

Merlin never came back to Camelot after Arthur's death, but at Gwen's funeral decades later, Leon sees him again.

(full collection link here)

Thank you everyone for participating! 💐💐💐

✨About the Non-Merthur Merlin Server: we're a positive space for all Merlin fans to discuss the show with a focus on rarepairs, lesser-discussed dynamics, and characters who need a bit more love! Everyone is welcome to join us on the server, just click here for the join link. ✨

[panharmonium]

you know what?

no.  absolutely not.

i already did part 1 of this post here.  i’m back again with part 2, because unfortunately the awfulness factor doesn’t stop with arthur, and as much as i adore hunith generally, this entire sequence is a MESS.

and yes, i am aware that pretty much nobody else thinks so.  every time i see this scene referenced in fandom, it is always framed as a fun, cutesy, sing-songy moment of “oooo, hunith ships merthur!”  literally every time.  

which, you know, like i always say about everything fandom-related - that’s fine.  everybody is going to enjoy things differently; you do you, and keep on having fun!  but here on my own blog, in my own space, i am gonna do me, and in this case ‘me’ involves yelling about how much i can’t stand that particular read, and how angry the end of 1.10 makes me.

disclaimer, to help folks curate their own fandom experiences: i am going to be Very Cranky for the rest of this post.  if you love this particular scene in the way i just mentioned, you will probably want to scroll on by, because this piece of meta most likely won’t be your jam.  as always, these are my personal thoughts and nobody is obligated to share them, so please do not hesitate to simply skip this post if we are on different wavelengths - instead, keep enjoying fandom in whatever way is most fun for you!

fair warning now given, off i go on a long, frustrated tirade.

i already wrote about the first half of this scene, where arthur decides that the appropriate thing to do at this particular moment is to give merlin a scolding about the evils of sorcery, despite the fact that the only reason arthur is even alive to deliver this lecture in the first place is because merlin’s ‘sorcerer’ best friend just DIED saving arthur’s life.  but sure, you know what, let’s use said best friend’s funeral to chastise merlin about how “dangerous” sorcerers are.  let’s just make that completely dickheaded decision.  

and, moving on to the second half of this scene - here’s the thing.  hunith overhears this entire conversation.  she overhears arthur telling merlin off about sorcery, in front of the burning corpse of merlin’s best friend, who is, as far as arthur knows, the ‘sorcerer’ who died saving arthur’s life.  

and yet, for some inexplicable reason, hunith still cannot get off the arthur pendragon train for two damn seconds.  

she has known arthur for less than a week.  by contrast, she has known will for his entire life.  but the instant arthur walks away, hunith sidles up next to merlin and says, “you’d better be going” - like.  okay, my god, can you try to hustle him away from his best friend’s in-progress funeral any faster?????  how about we maybe give him a second?  the pyre hasn’t even burnt down yet, and merlin hasn’t had a single second to himself since this sequence started.  he’s had to stand there and listen to arthur insult the dude who everyone is supposed to be memorializing, and then hunith - who overheard the entire thing - zips right over and tries to chivvy merlin on his way.  you’d better be going.

HELLO?!  the pyre is still roaring.  how about, instead of hassling merlin and hustling him offstage, everybody just sits down and waits for a minute.  how about they all just leave merlin alone for three everloving seconds.  

honestly, just - every time i think about this scene i get angrier.

i love hunith, and i know she’s well-intentioned.  but everything she gives merlin in this scene is the exact opposite of what he needs.  he doesn’t need to be hurried off the village green like there’s some reason he can’t stay there for the entirety of his friend’s funeral.  he doesn’t need to be pushed into going back to camelot when he is clearly struggling with the idea of leaving ealdor again.  and he absolutely does not need to be told how much someone else “needs” him right now, when he himself is the one who is having a fucking crisis and who needs someone to take care of him.

i cannot emphasize that last point enough.  it is just - beyond upsetting to me that hunith literally watches arthur shitting on merlin’s dead best friend (and, by proxy, merlin himself, since merlin is the actual sorcerer) and she still somehow thinks the right thing to do is walk over and start telling merlin how great arthur is and how arthur “needs” him and how merlin “belongs at arthur’s side.”  

i can’t stand that.  it makes me so angry.  it’s not right.  it’s not fair.  it’s damaging.  it’s the same shitty messaging that destroys merlin’s life in later seasons, this idea that he exists for someone else’s sake, the complete disregard for what he himself might want at any given moment, for what he himself might need, for the reservations he might have about this plan that other people have formulated for his life.

he is UNCOMFORTABLE when she says these things to him!  he doesn’t look at her; he shifts his gaze to arthur and the camelot squad with this grim, unconvinced expression on his face, and then he averts his eyes from her.

everything hunith tells merlin in this scene is the exact opposite of what he needs to hear.  he does not need someone to tell him how badly his services are “needed” by a man who hates the person merlin truly is, not when the only friend who ever accepted merlin’s true self has just been killed.  he does not need to be told that arthur, who is alive solely because will is dead and who only seconds ago expressed exactly zero gratitude for that sacrifice, is the person to whom merlin owes his undying loyalty.  he does not need to be shuffled off to camelot as quickly as possible, as if it would be better for him to just rush forward and forget what happened here, as if what happened here didn’t matter.  

because what happened here did matter, whether hunith and arthur find it convenient to acknowledge or not.  i have to lay this out again, because what happened to merlin in ealdor is so much more important than anybody ever seems to realize - and i do understand that, i really do (because yes, it was just one episode for us) - but we have to look at it from merlin’s perspective, not the audience’s.

will wasn’t ‘one episode’ for merlin.  

i can’t say this enough times.  i cannot say this loudly enough.

merlin, at the beginning of this show, has only ever had ONE FRIEND.

most of us can’t even imagine something like that.  

but try.  TRY.  

merlin has only ever had one friend.  he’s only ever had one friend to love him.  he only had one friend for the first two decades of his life.  he’s only been in camelot for a couple of months; he’s only known these camelot people for a couple of months, and they don’t know his real self anyhow.  and now his ONLY FRIEND, the person he’s known all his life, the only friend he ever had who knew him for who he truly was, was just violently cut down before his very eyes, whilst saving a guy who can legally have merlin murdered for just existing.  and even though merlin and will spend the entirety of 1.10 having a painful, complicated argument, will still uses his last moments on earth to tell the biggest fucking whopper of his life, in order to shield merlin from harm, taking all of the danger and infamy and condemnation upon himself.  he dies with a lie on his lips.  he dies with merlin’s hand in his hair.  

and all the while, merlin knows that this would not have happened if he had just been willing to use his magic in the first place, instead of letting his fear of discovery prompt him into allowing his neighbors to offer themselves up for the slaughter in his place.

the avalanching double-whammy of grief and guilt that merlin is suddenly slammed with at the end of this episode is almost incomprehensible in scale.

i’ve talked about this before, but again, i think it’s something we don’t generally remember: losing will is the first time merlin has ever experienced personal bereavement.  and he doesn’t get to start out with a warm-up; he goes straight to the big leagues.  this is not some trifling thing.  this is a total implosion of merlin’s world as he knows it.  

when we think about the mark this episode leaves on merlin’s life, i don’t think most of us consider the magnitude of this event deeply enough.  losing will in this way is not some one-off thing that merlin just...gets over.  this is the most earth-shattering thing that has ever happened to him, at this point in time.  it is still one of the worst things that has ever happened to him, period, even years later.  the guilt never goes away.  

and the thing that’s unique about this particular trauma is that merlin has to manage it alone.  there are other tragedies in his life where we witness him receiving support/comfort from others - freya, lancelot, balinor (though of course there are aspects to these miseries that merlin has to keep secret from other people, as well) - but with will, merlin has to do everything on his own.  he can’t get one single moment of peace at will’s funeral.  his own mother, the only person who knows what really happened, can’t help him without making everything about arthur.  and merlin can’t tell anyone else what happened, not the truth of it, because doing so would squander the gift he’s been given - will’s lie is still protecting him, years later, from arthur and morgana both.  

merlin, at the end of 1.10, is forced to navigate this grief completely alone, in the silent secrecy of his own heart.  arthur is actively making it worse.  hunith is out here singing arthur’s praises.  and will is just like - he’s suddenly not part of the conversation anymore.  he doesn’t even register on anyone’s radar.

it truly is...incredible, for me, to watch hunith overhear arthur being legitimately terrible to both merlin and the guy who just died saving merlin AND arthur’s lives, and then to see her come over and start talking about how merlin belongs at arthur’s side, how much merlin needs to be there for him, how they’re two sides of the same coin.  meanwhile, the guy who literally just lied his life away to protect merlin’s secret and who NEVER made merlin feel like he had to hide who he was and who never had any problem with magic in the first place and never made merlin feel unsafe and never treated merlin like he was less of a human being just for existing -

- he’s just burning to ash there, and hunith doesn’t even acknowledge that, despite the fact that merlin is so visibly, intently, single-mindedly focused on that funeral pyre, and so clearly in distress and in pain and NEEDING somebody.  all she can talk about is merlin’s responsibility to arthur.  

the dissonance here is baffling.  hunith has known will forever.  she met arthur less than a week ago.  she barely knows him, and what she does know is that he thinks magic-users are dangerous/evil.  she saw him being a dick to her kid.  she knows her son is having the worst day of his life.  and she still doesn’t offer a single comforting word in reference to the person who just died protecting merlin’s secret, instead choosing to wax poetic about a man whose bigotry is what merlin needed protecting from in the first place.

that...is a hot mess.  the merlin-hunith-will dynamic is one of the few things in this show that reflects less-than-stellarly on hunith’s character, however much i love her.  and even though it all stems from an overwhelming desire to keep her son safe, it doesn’t make her choices any less damaging.  she sends merlin away specifically because she finds out that will knows about his secret.  she spends 1.10 analyzing and encouraging and dissecting merlin’s relationship with arthur, when merlin’s relationship with will is the one that desperately needs attention.  she’s proven wrong about will’s trustworthiness in the most stunning, powerful way possible, and then she never even acknowledges him, instead choosing to laud the dude who literally forces merlin to live in fear of execution.

she’s merlin’s mother.  she’s the only person in his life who knows anything about what will actually meant to him.  she is his only possible resource as he tries to weather a kind of devastation that defies description.  

and she, like arthur, just barrels right on ahead and makes everything about someone else.

the cinematography choices in this scene matter.  whenever arthur or hunith tries to talk to merlin, the camera is placed on the opposite side of the fire from them, meaning the flames are always in the foreground of the frame.  they are something we are required to see and look past before we can get to anything else in the scene.  and in terms of directorial/acting decisions - merlin doesn’t take his eyes off the pyre until the end of his conversation with hunith.  not once while talking to arthur does he look away from it.

the funeral pyre is always in the foreground of the shot, because it’s in the forefront of merlin’s mind.  that is where his focus is right now.  that is what is taking up all of his attention.  that is what is edging into the frame, eating up our entire field of view.  that is what he needs help with.

but he doesn’t get any such support.  the entire sequence ends up revolving around arthur.  will’s entire funeral is about arthur fucking pendragon.  arthur inserts himself so he can talk to merlin about how evil magic is, and then hunith inserts herself so she can talk to merlin about how great arthur is.  nobody ever stops to think that maybe merlin doesn’t want to talk to anybody right this second.  merlin’s entire ‘farewell’ to the only true friend he ever had in his life is completely swallowed up by the prince of camelot, and if that isn’t a metaphor for the rest of merlin’s life, then i don’t know what is.  

i know nobody needs to hear this, because very few people are invested in this kid at the same level of embarrassing detail as me, but here it is, anyway.  

yes, will is prickly.  he’s hard to get on with.  he’s angry.  he’s bitter and snappy and uncharitable, sometimes.

but you know what?  he has every reason to be like that.  

this kid has nobody.  his own best friend’s mother - who has known him all his life - doesn’t trust him and doesn’t respect him.  she is too afraid for her own son’s safety to give will any credit.  she sends merlin away to camelot, the most violently anti-magic place in the world, because apparently, will knowing about merlin’s secret would be even more dangerous than uther pendragon’s genocidal reign.

think about how that would feel.  to hear something like that about yourself.  to be somebody who is already so goddamn alone in the world, and to have your only friend vanish without so much as a ‘see you later,’ and then to be made to feel, however indirectly, like this is somehow your fault, like you’re the liability, like you’re the untrustworthy element here.  as if you, somehow, are more dangerous than a king who literally pays to have sorcerers trafficked to him in cages.

will has every right to be upset, all the time.  he has every reason to be angry, and bitter, and hurt, all the time.  to be thought so poorly of - to be held in such low esteem - when he hasn’t done anything wrong, when he hasn’t ever done anything to earn that kind of mistrust - and to have that same misplaced suspicion used to justify separating him from the only person in the world who gives a damn about him - if it were me, i would be constantly on the verge of screaming, all the time.

will has always been on merlin’s side, and he has never done anything to endanger him, and in the end he gives up everything to make sure merlin can stay safe and hidden and unhunted.  he shouldn’t have needed to prove his goodness, his constancy, his worth; not when he’s already kept merlin’s secret for who knows how many years, but even after he does do so, it doesn’t even matter.  arthur acknowledges him only to disparage sorcery.  hunith passes him over completely in favor of praising arthur, with no acknowledgment of the misjudgment she made.

i have said before that merlin tends to befriend people who have nobody, people who’ve been left behind by the rest of the world, people who’ve been made to feel that they aren’t worthy of love.  and will, merlin’s oldest friend, was the first of those many characters, and it is so heartbreaking to me that in this instance, the same kind of disinterested and careless attitude towards his worth that dogged him all his life is perpetuated and affirmed after his death.  ‘people are used to ignoring him,’ merlin tells arthur, and merlin is right - even when will is dead and burning, arthur only sees sorcery.  hunith, who we would expect to be more sympathetic, only sees arthur.

merlin is the only one who knows better.  merlin has always known better, and he loves will so much, but he is the only one, apparently, and honestly, after will dies?  nobody else even tries to understand.

to sum up:

hunith and arthur, for all that i love them, are both way out of line at the end of this episode.  

the legacy of this experience, for merlin, is that he spends the rest of his life processing this particular trauma alone.  and that is why i always, always have to keep will and ealdor in the back of my mind when i write for merlin in any capacity - because this event isn’t some simple stumbling block for him; it changes him forever.  it teaches him what he can and can’t expect from the people around him, and it solidifies how irrelevant his own needs are when viewed in comparison with arthur’s, even to people who barely even KNOW arthur; people who are supposed to put merlin first over everything.  it teaches merlin to bury his sorrow, and to wrestle with personal suffering in secret, because if things aren’t ultimately about arthur, then they aren’t important enough to be granted any significant amount of time for merlin to deal with.  merlin’s own grief, even at his best friend’s funeral, takes too long to resolve.  arthur walks away from the pyre, and it’s time for merlin to leave, too.  you’d better be going.

bottom line: i don’t care if other people think this whole ‘ooo, everybody wants merlin to be with arthur’ thing is wonderful or beautiful or dreamily romantic.  it isn’t.  it’s ugly, and it’s cruel, and it stripped merlin of his present identity and his future potential, one stolen moment at a time.

[katieskeep]

Starting from this very Sunday I have decided to make a weekly list (10 fics at the time) of my favourite Merthur fanfictions. My original idea was creating a masterpost (a sort of TOP 100 list) but after browsing through my 3000+ bookmarks -collected since 2008- I've slowly come to realise that I would have definetely forgotten some really good ones and I have no intention of doing that. I'll always be immensely grateful to all the writers of the Merlin/Merthur fandom for creating a safe space for all fans and for sharing with us some of the most memorable stories I've ever read. You've made me dream, you've made me weep and particularly during lockdown you've made me forget all the ugly and kept me sane... so thank you ♥

• WEEK #1

All fanfictions have been chosen in random order from my Diigo account. They vary from modern setting to historical, from canon to reincarnation... but I'd say 80% of them will be set in modern times as it's my favourite era for them. Hope you enjoy this first batch and that YOU may discover some new favourites :3

01. A FORTUNATE FALL by raspberry-pop Summary: Single father Arthur Pendragon, at the end of his rope, finds a miracle in the form of a young cashier boy at the local convenience store. As for Merlin, he's not quite sure about what to make of his new job as an au pair for the wealthiest man in town; but he does know that his employer has more than a few skeletons in his closet.

02. WHAT CHILD IS THIS by lamardeuse Summary: A modern AU with Merlin, Arthur, mayhem, a baby and a jingly elf hat.

03. TO THE SYNTAX OF THINGS by suntipped Summary: He can’t mean what Merlin thinks he means—right? It’s just Merlin’s imagination running away with him, too many nerves this morning, a lack of sleep, the disorientation of being in such an unfamiliar place, or something, that’s it. Merlin edges slightly, subtly back toward the door, but the boy sees his movement and grins even wider like it’s some secret joke, laughs, “Oh, relax,” and strolls forward to easily follow his steps, lingering even closer than before. “I’m not some deranged lunatic,” the boy says, but the very lascivious gleam in his eye ruins it by definitely, definitely claiming otherwise.

04. FAME AND FORTUNE by Bounding-Heart Summary: AU set in Los Angeles, California during the 1990's. Arthur is a movie star. Merlin is a waiter. The word "prat" is used.

05. AN OCEAN OF BLUE by Inane_Rational Summary: His father's empire was falling. There's one last thing he needs to retrieve before leaving the country.

06. CELLMATE by lcacbc Summary: Merlin is dead. No, really. He has just called the most powerful man in prison a prat. A prat he just happens to be cellmates with.

07. OVERBOARD by Shiny Starlight Summary: When single father Merlin Emerson discovers that the man who denied him thousands of dollars that was his due has gotten amnesia, he seizes his chance for revenge by pretending to be his husband. The joke is on him though when he realises that Arthur Pennington is possibly even more wonderful that he ever could have imagined...

08. THE GOOD TIMES ARE KILLING ME by minor hue Summary: In which the boys pretend to still be together for Christmas (and there is more than one kind of charade).

09. SEW RIGHT by Candymacaron Summary: Arthur, an all American boy fresh out of the Midwest, is thrust head-first into college life in San Francisco. He'd expected moving in with his girlfriend to be a change, but what Arthur hadn't counted on was the Merlin, the handsome fashion design student he'd be sharing their apartment with (and just how strongly he would feel about him).

10. SMALL WEIRD WORLD by Emjayelle Summary: Merlin is thirteen and in love when he kisses Arthur for the first time. His skin is always too tight, there’s constantly the taste of chlorine in his mouth, and a lot of things—too many things—are left unsaid. It’s very complicated and very confusing, not helped at all by the fact that Arthur doesn't seem to know what he wants either. Early teenage awakenings, unrequited love, pining, coming of age, and feelings. Lots of feelings.

[merlinbingo]

First up, I just want to say wow! Not sure what I was expecting when I started this, but you guys have just been amazing.

Over the course of January, we’ve had 126 sign-ups! Of those, 21 people have already created a whopping 43 fills, and one of you has even got a bingo!

All fills created in January (GMT) have been reblogged, and all badges earned in January have been sent out. If you think we’ve missed you, please reach out!

We’ve got a lot of fills to round up, so they’re all hidden below the cut and sorted by ship and then by rating.

Take a look, take heed of the tags/warnings/ratings (including those where the creator has decided to use the 'Not rated' and 'Choose not to use archive warnings' options - these works could contain anything at all, so please practice self-care when deciding whether or not to click on that link!) and make sure you leave these wonderful creators some love!

Gen/No ship

In a Year, in a Season, in a Moment. by BardsBeBardin924 Rating: General audiences Ao3 warnings: No archive warnings apply Summary: A short series of short poems. Four characters, four seasons. Explorations of love and pain. Just the human things.

The Danger Of Frog Catching by Simoneleona & blueclaw7 Rating: General audiences Ao3 warnings: No archive warnings apply Summary: When Elyan heard of the frog catching adventures of his friend, he immediately wanted to do so himself. It is nothing new that Gwen is busy when Elyan wants to do something.

cat!Merlin by unmarkedinlife Rating: General audiences Ao3 warnings: No archive warnings apply Summary: Court Sorcerer Merlin is still cute transformed into a cat.

No Sword in Our Lake by BardsBeBardin924 Rating: Teen Ao3 warnings: Major character death Summary: A fragmented Camelot reels in the immediate aftermath of the battle at Camlann. Queens, Knights, and Sorcerers come together to fight through their grief to do the one thing they know: live, and live, and live some more, for those who are no longer able.

Running by donttouchtheneednoggle Rating: Teen Ao3 warnings: Major character death Summary:

Burning by donttouchtheneednoggle Rating: Teen Ao3 warnings: Major character death Summary:

Immortal by donttouchtheneednoggle Rating: Teen Ao3 warnings: Major character death Summary:

Merlin/Freya

Freylin Avalon AU by camelotsheart Rating: General audiences Ao3 warnings: No archive warnings apply Summary: Freya and Arthur have a conversation about Merlin in Avalon.

Merlin/Gwaine

Drowning by donttouchtheneednoggle Rating: Teen Ao3 warnings: Major character death Summary:

Arthur/Gwaine

Jealousy, Turning Saints Into The Sea by fxndom-hoe Rating: Teen Ao3 warnings: No archive warnings apply Summary: Gwaine is flirtatious by nature. Arthur gets jealous easily. What a fun mix.

Arthur/Lancelot

Servant by donttouchtheneednoggle Rating: Teen Ao3 warnings: Major character death Summary:

Arthur/Mithian

Brief Encounters by Fluffypotatey Rating: General audiences Ao3 warnings: No archive warnings apply Summary: Two different times, Mithian can remember meeting Arthur. Now she is to marry him. She wonders if he even remembers her.

Merlin/Arthur

Take my hand, wreck my plans by heartsocold Rating: General audiences Ao3 warnings: No archive warnings apply Summary: Arthur doesn't know how to be affectionate but for Merlin he'll try.

But first, skin care. by heartsocold Rating: General audiences Ao3 warnings: No archive warnings apply Summary: Merlin and Arthur are bloggers who are introduced to the world of skin care.

Hopelessly devoted (to you) by Stardustwrites17 Rating: General audiences Ao3 warnings: Choose not to use archive warnings Summary: When Arthur and Merlin visit Queen Elena's castle, their stay gets prolonged by un unexpected storm.

when the truth comes out by heartsocold Rating: General audiences Ao3 warnings: Graphic depictions of violence Summary: When a vengeful sorcerer kidnaps Arthur, Merlin will do anything to keep him safe. Even if that means revealing his magic.

I Miss Your Smile by QueenoftheBritons Rating: General audiences Ao3 warnings: No archive warnings apply Summary: Once magic is made legal and Merlin is appointed Court Sorcerer, he thinks things should change rather quickly. Unfortunately, even now people will fool and take advantage.

Humans Are Annoying, Their Mating Practices Even More So by tehfanglyfish Rating: Teen Ao3 warnings: No archive warnings apply Summary: After waiting for Merlin and Arthur to confess their obvious love for one another, Kilgharrah gets annoyed and takes matters into his own hands. Or rather paws. Or feet. Or whatever.

Secrets of a Lifetime by huniths-muse Rating: Teen Ao3 warnings: No archive warnings apply Summary: Arthur notices that his son has a very distinctive birthmark. Turns out, Merlin has one too.

standing in a timeless dream by Emma, or ItsAWonderfulLife on ao3 Rating: Teen Ao3 warnings: No archive warnings apply Summary: For the “space” prompt - Merthur domesticity sharing the same living space and getting ready for bed.

standing in a timeless time by Emma, or ItsAWonderfulLife on ao3 Rating: Teen Ao3 warnings: No archive warnings apply Summary: Domesticity and occupying each other's space getting ready for bed.

he'll know me crazy, soothe me daily, better yet, he wouldn't care by Emma, or ItsAWonderfulLife Rating: Teen Ao3 warnings: No archive warnings apply Summary: Arthur and Merlin have kids and they're single parents and barely functioning humans.

Battered and Wrecked, I Come to You First by queerofthedagger Rating: Teen Ao3 warnings: No archive warnings apply Summary: Life has a habit of throwing challenges at anyone. Some are almost mundane, like surviving finals or breaking your wrist in a bike crash. Others are much harder, like standing up to your father and making your own path. All of them, though, are easier to bear if you have someone who sticks with you through hell or highwater.

I'd give you all the years of my life by Emma, or ItsAWonderfulLife on AO3 Rating: Teen Ao3 warnings: No archive warnings apply Summary: Hanahaki prompt - Merthur journey to find some magical people who may be able to cure Arthur's 'condition'. They're idiots as usual.

The Issue of Knighthood by evaelisaa Rating: Teen Ao3 warnings: Choose not to use archive warnings Summary: Arthur offers Merlin knighthood (he has his reasons), but Merlin declines (he also has his reasons).

I'm already gone (chapter title is 'wish we had more time') by Emma, or ItsAWonderfulLife on AO3 Rating: Teen Ao3 warnings: Major character death Summary: Chapter summary: Merlin reminisces, and makes a wish. Story summary: I watched Wonder Woman 1984 and decided to make it Merthur so y'all can suffer with me.

Chapter title: 'anything you want' by Emma, or ItsAWonderfulLife on AO3 Rating: Teen Ao3 warnings: Major character death Summary: Chapter 2 of fic 'I'm already gone' - Merlin makes tea and toast and is just grumpy on main with his cat mug, Ralph. Someone might be coming back at the end of this chapter. Merlin Bingo Square #C5 - Slice of Life.

Uneasy lies the head that wears the crown by emma.freeman313 Rating: Teen Ao3 warnings: No archive warnings apply Summary: Ostracise: to exclude, by general consent, from society, friendship, conversation, privileges, etc.

Heavy is the heart that loves the crown by emma.freeman313 Rating: Teen Ao3 warnings: No archive warnings apply Summary: Duty of care: a moral or legal obligation to ensure the safety or well-being of others. Servitude: the state of being a slave or completely subject to someone more powerful. Devotion: love, loyalty, or enthusiasm for a person or activity. Love: indefinable.

to ash and dust by TheDragon Rating: Teen Ao3 warnings: No archive warnings apply Summary: They used to be different, the dreams; they've changed over the years. The person condemning him to death used to be nothing more than an expressionless, vacant face attached to a man's body; yet when he moved to Camelot it became Uther: his face red with rage and veins throbbing at his temple and the side of his neck.

fireworks by Emma, ItsAWonderfulLife Rating: Teen Ao3 warnings: Major character death Summary: Arthur gets acquainted with the new world. Something continues to be wrong with Merlin's magic. The plague spreads to other continents. Basically just Arthur being a space nerd.

the beauty in what is by ItsAWonderfulLife (Emma) Rating: Teen Ao3 warnings: Major character death Summary: Arthur's POV for this one folks. The Winter Solstice comes to Avalon, and to Glastonbury. Merlin thinks he's good at keeping secrets but Arthur has another informant.

truth by ItsAWonderfulLife (Emma) Rating: Teen Ao3 warnings: Major character death Summary: The big sad chapter. Arthur has to go back, because they have to save the world. The death is very much temporary though I promise I require happy endings always.

in the winter night sky, ships are sailing by ItsAWonderfulLife Rating: Teen Ao3 warnings: No archive warnings apply Summary: Merlin and Arthur are happy with their relationship. They're madly in love, and have no need for sex. The rest of the world doesn't really seem to understand, but that's okay.

don't tell me what to do by ItsAWonderfulLife Rating: Teen Ao3 warnings: No archive warnings apply Summary: Arthur's last name is PenDRAGON.

Kisses and Kingdoms - Royal Merlin by Emma, emma.freeman313 on Spotify Rating: Mature Ao3 warnings: No archive warnings apply Summary: The playlist tells the tale of Merlin being born as a druid prince and his parents celebrating (Daughter), for he symbolises a new hope for magic users everywhere. He spends his youth carefree and wild in the druidic realm and amongst nature (Pierre), but eventually leaves for Camelot (From Eden) to negotiate peace treaties with the new king once Uther passes, where he meets King Arthur and is instantly enamoured (ocean eyes). He is delighted to discover Arthur is lovely and wants peace as much as he does, and they work together, but he falls in love with him, and, believing Arthur to be in love with Gwen, grows extremely sad (I couldn't be more in love) and flees to the woods. Arthur rides after him, catching up to him to inform him he's an idiot, Gwen's married to Morgana, and that he's hopelessly in love with Merlin (Can't help falling in love). Merlin is overwhelmed with emotion and proposes to Arthur (Marry Me), binding them with druidic love runes for marriage. They rule over a prosperous and thriving combined Camelot/foresty kingdom of love and acceptance at such a young age, still intimidated by the responsibilities they face and still dealing with some TraumaTM on Arthur's part but grateful to have each other (Young God).

Falsely Accused by johnlock-and-merthur-4ever Rating: Mature Ao3 warnings: Graphic depictions of violence Summary: Arthur is out on a hunt when Aredian arrives. Aredian accuses Merlin of being a sorcerer and things go downhill. (Or uphill depending on who you are)

some of us love you Achilles, it's not much but there's proof by ItsAWonderfulLife Rating: Mature Ao3 warnings: Choose not to use archive warnings Summary: Merlin Bingo #G5 'Illnesses' - After a fight with Merlin, Arthur flees to the only place in the city he can breathe. Morgana helps him talk about his feelings. MASSIVE TW FOR MENTION OF SUICIDE AND DEPRESSION. Nobody dies. Happy ending. Sad fic.

Go for It (Nobody moves, nobody gets hurt) by nuttersinc / Leandra (ao3) Rating: Explicit Ao3 warnings: Underage Summary: Merlin is definitely not in love with his soon-to-be stepbrother Arthur. In fact, they have trouble being civil to each other. Their animosity doesn’t keep Merlin from misappropriating Arthur’s shirt for a guilt-tripped wank though.

Reflecting Ecstasy by MerthurAllure Rating: Explicit Ao3 warnings: No archive warnings apply Summary: Arthur fingers Merlin in front of a mirror so he can watch

You Give Me Fever by slantedknitting Rating: Explicit Ao3 warnings: No archive warnings apply Summary: Arthur is a history teacher who just wants to live his life in peace. Morgana is the frontwoman of a successful band, and she bursts back into Arthur’s life after a two-year estrangement. As Arthur wades cautiously back into his sister’s life, he meets the band’s new drummer, Merlin. Merlin is charming and clever and, per Morgana’s decree, off limits to Arthur. Now Arthur has to decide if he wants to appease his sister or go after what (who) he really wants.

protective merlin by bananichu Rating: Not rated Ao3 warnings: No archive warnings apply Summary: its a drawing

the violet sheds (Ch. 2) by unmarkedinlife Rating: Not rated Ao3 warnings: No archive warnings apply Summary: After Arthur discovers Agravaine's treachery, he follows Merlin and Gwaine to Chemary. The revelations that follow will change everything.

[merthurglompfest]

Merthur Glompfest 2020 Masterlist

Thank you to everyone who participated in Merthur Glompfest 2020! It’s been a bit of a ride, with all of us having to deal with extremely unexpected circumstances compared to when the fest launched, but we hope that everyone is safe and well, and that all our Glompee’s enjoy their gifts!  Please check out the masterlist below for all our fantastic entries and we look forward to seeing you all next year!

fifty_fifty & schweet_heart

Gift for mega_mathi | Better with You | by Leandra [ Explicit | 15344 ] Summary:  Arthur is having a terrible day full of bad news, misfortune and a mouthy and irritating manservant. Strangely enough, it’s a rather surprising altercation with said irritating manservant that turns the day around and soon, Arthur is convinced that having Merlin in his bed is the remedy to cure all his horrible days… Gift for broken_fannibal | Breaking Points | by elirwen [ Teen & Up | 2595 ] Summary: His magic bound, their captors ruthless in their torture, Merlin needs to find a way to get both Arthur and himself to freedom. Gift for KimliPan | Broken Days, A Guide and How To Manual | by arsenicandsunshine [ Teen & Up | 20652 ] Summary: In which if Merlin has to see the cracked gray of his bedroom ceiling one more time, he’s gonna scream. Or punch someone. Maybe the wall. Definitely Arthur, who can’t seem to find the words to say what he wants to, but after the morning Merlin’s had, whatever it was can’t possible help. Gift for silklace | The Coming of the Golden Age | by fifty_fifty [ Explicit | 49526 ] Summary:  With King Uther dead, the moment Merlin has been waiting for is finally here: Arthur is king. But his and Arthur's relationship isn't the only thing that's heating up, and with the threat of war on one side and social unrest on the other, some big changes are in store for Camelot – whether they like it or not. Gift for nekoii | The confident king and his nervous mage. | by digthewriter [ Gen | Art ] Summary: Arthur and Merlin on their wedding day. Gift for mega_mathi | A convenient marriage | by Lyss2011 [ Teen & Up | 13786 ] Summary: Love, Merlin thought, caressing the word and signature with his thumb. Arthur was courting someone whom he loved. And who he loved was Mithian. What else could the M stand for? In which Merlin and Arthur have a marriage of convenience, Merlin falls in love with Arthur, and Arthur courts someone who couldn't possibly be Merlin. Gift for actuallyitscaptain | A Crown of Smoke | by CandiceWright [ Explicit | 5421 ] Summary: The execution of a sorceress leaves Camelot on edge and triggers a magical threat that Merlin can only fight by revealing himself. Then Arthur is presented with a choice: to follow his father's footsteps or to let Merlin live, all while battling his feelings for the servant. In the end, it wasn't much of a choice, was it? Gift for jasminum_draconis | Daughters and Fathers and Sons, oh my! | by archaeologist_d [ Mature | 3608 ] Summary:  Morgana was just trying to help keep Arthur and Merlin’s liaison a secret. Little did she know that there was more than one secret in the castle. Gift for afreezingnote | Deadly Games | by keeperofstories [ Teen & Up | 31281 ] Summary: Merlin, Arthur, and the knights of the Round Table get caught in a trap. The trap wasn't meant for them but they have to suffer through the consequences anyway. Secrets are revealed and relationships are threatened. Gift for Cupidity11 | The Diamond Sea | by Excaliburstark [ Gen | 11123 ] Summary: Merlin comes to court, driven by curiosity and desire after he saved a golden haired man during a storm. A Mer!Prince Merlin and Royal Arthur au Gift for Aranei | Don't Let it Be Forgot, That Once There Was a Spot, for One Brief Shining Moment, That Was Known As Camelot | by Emrys MK (mk_malfoy) [ Teen & Up | 8617 ] Summary: An emotionally constipated Prince Arthur thinks he’s being clever in his endeavour to push his new manservant, Merlin, away, but his plan has a major flaw and unexpected consequences. How far will he go to get what he’s lost back? Gift for Merlioske | down the rabbit hole | by TheDragon [ Mature | 4899 ] Summary:  In which Arthur discovers Merlin is sleeping with Gwaine and promptly flies into a jealous rage. Gift for actuallyitscaptain | The Eternal Silence of These Infinite Spaces | by aoigensou [ Teen & Up | 26069 ] Summary: After a spat with Arthur, Merlin retreats for some quiet in the Darkling Woods. What happens there takes away his voice, and forces Merlin to figure out how to exist in a world where communication doesn't come easily. Gift for blueskysunnyday | Feint | by Camelittle [ Explicit | 14440 ] Summary: Three insufferable brothers visit Camelot, making life intolerable for Arthur. Luckily, he has a cunning plan for escaping into the forest with Merlin. A totally solid, sound and foolproof plan, which he certainly is not making up as he goes along. Gift for Jayfire | The Hat is Never Wrong | by MapleBreeze [ Gen | 2504 ] Summary:  When Arthur gets sorted into Hufflepuff upon arriving to Hogwarts, he is shocked and devastated, fearing his father's reaction. But the hat is never wrong and Arthur becomes determined to show just how great Hufflepuff can be.   Gift for KimliPan | Heart of the Woods | by Nympha_Alba [ Gen | 4801 ] Summary:  When one of Merlin's spells misfires, Arthur is left without a memory of who he is and why he's there. Thinking Arthur will have no recollection of any of this when his memory returns, Merlin makes the risky decision to show him how beautiful magic can be. Gift for actuallyitscaptain | Hold On To Your Heart (Hold It High Above Flood Waters) | by tehfanglyfish [ Teen & Up | 10437 ] Summary: After accidentally causing Uther's death, Morgana entered self-imposed exile. The loneliness took a heavy toll until the Great Dragon swooped into her life to recruit her for babysitting duty. Now Morgana spends her days caring for Aithusa, while using her magic to spy on Camelot. As she discovers the secrets that Arthur and Merlin have been keeping from each other, what choice does she have but to give them a much-needed shove? Gift for KasumiAFKGod |  It's the Distance We Don't Need | by tabbytabbytabby [ Teen & Up | 6245 ] Summary:  Merlin can't stand Arthur, and he's more than sure Arthur feels the same way. It's been that way for as long as Merlin can remember. There's no reason for that to change. He's fine with the way things are. It's not as if he likes him or anything. No, the person he likes is Al, one of his best friends that he talks to about everything. The only problem is they met online and despite knowing they go to the same school, Merlin has no idea who Al really is. Things grow more complicated when Merlin and Arthur are forced to work together on a project and Merlin starts to realize that maybe Arthur isn't as bad as he thought. Gift for Merlioske AND pukajen | Light the way Home | by actuallyitscaptain [ Gen | 1097 ] Summary: Freya lives, and Merlin runs off with her, sure that his feelings for Arthur will never be reciprocated. Arthur is stuck at the castle trying not to panic because Merlin LEFT HIM! To top it off, his connection with his soulmate is flaring up. Since soulmates are worse than magic in his father's eyes, he and Gaius are left trying to dodge bullets. Gift for Aranei | Lucky Charm | by Aeris444 [ Gen | 1087 ] Summary: The Knights think Merlin bring them luck. But who will be lucky in the end? Gift for Merlioske | Meddling and Other Sins. | by Michaelssw0rd [ Teen & Up | 5541 ] Summary: Gwaine is just about Done™ watching Arthur and Merlin dance around each other. It's been going on for too long. Any more of it will give Gwaine brain disease-- if he hasn't already contracted one from the two idiots. So really, doing something to get those two together is almost as much for his own sanity, as it is for them. Gift for SeverusBarbosa | Merlin, Morgana, and the Merry Men | by Elizabeth [ Mature | 13645 ] Summary: Merlin and Gwaine return from the Crusades to find Prince Agravaine and the Sheriff of Nottingham terrorizing the local peasants. Arthur and Gwen never wanted to be a part of a corrupt ruling class, but it's the card fate has dealt them. Merlin, though, isn't one to sit back and let it happen, so he and Morgana make a plan: steal from the rich and give to the poor. Together with their merry men, they're the stuff of legends.But being Robin Hood becomes more complicated when one falls for Arthur and the other falls for Gwen. Gift for Kais767 | Not so Silent a Night | by archaeologist_d [ Explicit | 7134 ] Summary: Merlin and Arthur are returning from their final quest for the year when a blizzard blocks the road back to Camelot. The closest village just happens to be Ealdor. But with Arthur an insensitive prat, and Merlin resenting having to be a servant in his own home and at Christmas time no less, things get a little heated. Gift for deathcomeswithakiss | only honest when it rains | by somethingaboutwriting [ Teen & Up | 11081 ] Summary: Merlin is sneaking off to see a girl. Arthur's handling it very well. That is, apart from these weird flowers he keeps coughing up. Gift for Krysania | The Portrait | by arthurandhisswordbros [ Teen & Up | 20917 ] Summary: Arthur must have his portrait made. It is customary that the man servant is depicted as well with his master. Arthur makes the most of the occasion by secretly ordering the painter to produce a small portrait of Merlin smiling. He keeps it preciously in a locket around his neck. Merlin is going crazy with curiosity. Gift for Jayfire | Of Clotpoles and Idiots | by sdewan6 [ Teen & Up | 1592 ] Summary: “You know, Merlin,” Arthur says, once it’s done, “For such an idiot, you’re not that bad.”Merlin beams back at him, unconsciously reaching to tug at his neckerchief. “For such a prat,” he replies, “you don’t always completely suck.” Four times Arthur called Merlin an idiot and the one time Merlin called him a clotpole. Gift for El_tuco | Operation: Picnic Basket | by DevonShea [ Gen | 3562 ] Summary:  Arthur wants to get Gwen and Lancelot together. He needs Merlin's help, of course. Could it lead to something more? Gift for nekoii | Rain Over Me with the Colours of Love | by sdewan6 [ Teen & Up | 2494 ] Summary: Arthur tries to return his focus back to the speech, but Merlin is the only thing on his mind, for some reason. Not that he likes him or anything, obviously. Nothing about his idiotic smile or his dumb gorgeous blue eyes or stupid neckerchief that suits him so much makes Arthur want to kiss him. Absolutely not. He’s the prince! He’s not going to fall in love with his manservant. Except he already kind of has. In which Arthur really loves Merlin and Merlin really loves Arthur Gift for BlazingPenicls | Tripping in the Flowers | by actuallyitscaptain [ Gen | 1378 ] Summary:  Arthur tries (and mostly succeeds) at being romantic. Really, what more can you expect from two idiots in love? Gift for broken_fannibal | Trying to Hide | by fictionalinfinity [ Gen | 1761 ] Summary: When Merlin fails to show up to work, Arthur is furious, but that all changed when he finds Merlin in tears. Gift for afreezingnote | Whatever You Want to Be | by Impala_Chick [ Teen & Up | 5329 ] Summary: Arthur, and those that were hiding out with him in the caves, are captured by scouts and dragged back to Camelot. Morgana sets Arthur's public execution into motion to solidify her rule. But her plans are thwarted when Merlin reveals his magic. After the dust settles, Arthur can't deny that his feelings about magic, and about Merlin, have changed. Gift for deathcomeswithakiss |  You've Got Your Reasons | by FervidAsAFlame (with art by CandiceWright) [ Teen & Up | 11678 & art ] Summary:  Arthur is the perfect flatmate — he pays his rent on time, works so much that he’s not even home half the time, and is totally okay with Merlin’s magic. Best of all, Merlin is pretty sure that Arthur has a crush on him — that is, until he stumbles across a list of things that Arthur hates about him. Merlin is upset of course, but he pushes aside his feelings to focus on being a better roommate so that Arthur will renew their lease for another year. Most of the things on the list aren’t that hard to correct … so how come Arthur seems to get more and more annoyed as Merlin improves his behaviour?

[brainrotallthewaydown1312]

I'll start with the ones I have already accrued this year, it's already may so strap in. im organizing by fandom but other than that it's in no order. also I'm including ships as blorbos and the characters on their own, it's my list and i do what i want

Leverage

the single best crime show ever made. please watch it. my children. and no, i am not leaving anyone out

OT3 (Parker x Hardison x Eliot) (i will go down with this ship forever and it is canon in my heart. and according to John Rogers. and the actors. and my eyeballs)

Parker (chaos gremlin. also autism)

Hardison (my lil dude also chaos bisexual with adhd)

Eliot (my lil grump)

Sophie (the ot3 needed a parent and she does not disappoint)

Our Mr. Wilson (lil guy)

Breanna (funky nerd. i love her. and her ace space sticker makes me so happy)

Sterling (garbage man derogatory. i hate this insurance cop turned actual international cop with a passion. him being written so well will haunt me to my grave)

Chaos (funky lil weirdo. also can't go wrong with Wil Wheaton)

Merlin

the cavernous rot has been growing in my brain since I was 7 years old. and it has not stopped growing in the 15 years since. the day these blorbos go dormant is the day i die.

Merthur (obviously I'm not stupid i have eyes. i knew these fucks were gay before i knew i was gay. and before i knew what gay was)

Merlin (love the "baby gorl to tired grump" arc. also he is the peak of twink-for-title-character)

Arthur (pathetic damp kitten. i want to feed him decency through a little dropper. and maybe slap him round the head a bit. because he is dumb and also stupid)

Gwen (best character in this series. not favorite because i don't pick those but objectively best person and best written character)

Gwaine (obligatory bisexual with ADHD)

Lancelot (sad boy hours and also the only man with a braincell in the whole show. if you want this show to hurt more, watch it with the reading that Lance is in love with Merlin)

The Knights™ (they are like little puppies)

Morgana (tragically)

Aithusa (deserved better)

Gaius (i may have stolen my personality from him as a child. the world will never know)

Six of Crows

specifically the books and season 2 of the Netflix adaptation. nothing against it, but i never got into the rest of the grishaverse. just these goofs

Kaz Brekker (my child (derogatory) i picked up this series because i heard about him and i was right to do so. grumpy lil storm cloud with his dramatic ass crow cane. i want that cane so bad)

Inej (i relate to her growth and love her badassery)

Kanej (Kaz x Inej) (only straights in this series i support. grump for grump supremacy. they both need someone to put them in their place and this works perfectly. also the Angst™ hits different with these two)

Jesper (obligatory bisexual with adhd. dramatic bitch i love him)

Wylan (my child (affectionate) small kitten that deserves the world and got nothing. nothing and Jesper)

Wesper (Wylan x Jesper) (because obviously. also the fanfic of them that was the adaptation was adorable if entirely separate. if you only look at the show their romcom ass storyline is the perfect foil for whatever kanej have going on. they watered my crops for months.)

Kesper (Kaz and Jesper) (not my main ship for either of them and they aren't necessarily romantic or sexual but there is something queer here. i don't know what, but something. found family. queerplatonic. exes turned besties. something)

Nina (i love her so much. also give her a girlfriend yesterday. i honestly don't care which girlfriend, just any girlfriend)

Ted Lasso

This is my newest set of children but i love them so much. this show has knocked me off my feet

Roy Kent (grump of the year. i am stealing several of his lines both as vocal stims and as personal catchphrases)

Jamie Tartt (it's the growth for me. and he is baby girl. also obligatory chaos bisexual with adhd)

Keeley Jones (the smartest one on the show i swear to God. i will die on that hill. they all need therapy and Keeley is the closest a lot of them get for a long time. until Sharon)

RoyJamieKeeley (i will go down with this ship in my clown makeup after that korrasami ass ending) (also the ship names in this fandom are absolute shit. where's the creativity? the flavor?)

Ted (obviously but i do love him so much. he reminds me a lot of the friend that got me into this show)

Beard (i haven't related to a character so much in a long time. he's quiet and he's in the background but he's still important and he's always on top of everything because he's an observer. but he's a mess himself. i wish we had gotten more of him)

Nate (joker arc and all)

Rebecca (girlboss)

Higgens (i love how everyone is so intense in one way or another and higgens is just a dude™)

Sam Obisanya (i just got him but if anything happens to him i will kill everyone)

Dani Rojas (i love this goofy ADHD little fucker. i love how bouncy and small he is and i love how he says his own name like a little pokemon)

Trent Crimm (sarcastic, bitter, gay, old man trying to be better? that's several of my boxes. and his hair is perfect)

tedependant (Ted x trent, also know as the singular acceptable ship name in this whole fandom. it's like the straights beat us to all of them except this one) (I'm not even to the point where there is a lot to go on, but this ship is adorable. they are a perfect sunshine/raincloud couple especially with Trent's season 3 arc which i have been told about before getting to)

Phoebe (she gets RoyJamie together by asking a kid question or saying something innocent that clicks it into place for them, fight me)

Puppet History

i did not expect to get so hype about this series when i got into it but here we are

the professor (need i say more)

Descendants

my friend has a recurring hyperfixation with these movies and the fandom and i got dragged into it this time around. and honestly, no regrets. Kenny Ortega can do no wrong

Uma (i love her)

Harry Hook (obligatory chaos bisexual with adhd. "i never learned to count because I'm number one" ass bitch)

Ben (begrudgingly because he is a little flat, but harry can fix that)

Benry (Ben x Harry) (see above)

Malvie (Evie x Mal. Mal is my least favorite character that i actually like but this ship. it just makes sense)

Umal (Uma x Mal. also just makes sense)

Jay (best himbo boy)

Carlos (my lil guy)

Dude (i am stealing him from Carlos)

Gil (Himbo²)

Gay (gil x jay, they have the single best ship name in the series. top 10 ship names of all time in my book. also they have so much chemistry in like two minutes of screentime together and for what? studios need to allow Kenny Ortega to let booboo Stewart kiss a man)

Doug (Doug is transfem and helps Evie realize she is a lesbian. fight me on this. i will win)

Hades (hear me out: is he a bad dad? yes. is he kinda shitty? yes. but that deadbeat dad duet kicked ass and if you engage with the other stuff like the wedding short, he has growth. and he's played by Cheyenne Jackson. and his lair is a vibe)

IT Crowd

after watching this as a kid and not thinking about this show for a little under a decade, the hyperfixation slapped me hard in the face literally the night before it was taken off of Netflix. i will die mad about it

Roy (fuckin dork. "have you tried turning it off and on again" has lived rent free in my mind even when the rest of the show wasn't. that and "0118-999-88199-9119-725...3" also, fight me, obligatory chaos bisexual with adhd)

Moss (one of the first examples of a heavily autistic coded character i remember relating to as a child. i love him)

Roy x Moss (i refuse to acknowledge their ship name because it uses Roy's last name. that was mentioned literally once and Ross is right there) (this ao3 tag is how i survived the month of march. and part of April. there are less than 300 in the tag and like 80 of them are one person in the last two years. thank you to that person)

Richmond (the best character. wish there was more of them)

Douglas (Matt Berry strikes again. like 15 years ago but still)

New Girl

one of my red flag sitcoms. when this pops up in my Netflix history it is always because i am depressed. but it is actually a good show and they moved it to Hulu, so it's fine probably

Nick Miller (the similarities i have with this man are upsetting. for everyone else. I'm fine. probably)

Schmidt (baby girl. derogatory)

Winston (my best lil weirdo)

Jess (i may be Nick, but i have a friend that is Jess. to defend my case, it is the same friend who got me into both descendants and Ted lasso in the span of one month. the only difference between us and the characters is that we have no romantic chemistry and are both aro)

Cece (obligatory chaos bisexual with adhd. but she is the rare femme variety. and also somehow the braincell of the group. i love her

Schmece (hell of a ship name for a hell of a ship)

Dracula Daily

i read the book as a kid, so last year i thought I'd get the memes if i just followed the tag but i got lost so fast. so this year i made the mistake of actually following dracula daily and re: dracula and now i can't get it out of my head

Johnathan Harker (baby girl)

Mina (boss ass bitch)

(i am slightly behind due to my other hyperfixations, but i know more of these guys will join the list as the year goes on)

Renfield

i watched this with my friends because of dracula, and i love it so much. i know this movie is fairly recent but it needs more fics immediately. go watch it. it about two pathetic men breaking up and one of them having his bisexual awakening with Awkwafina, the girlboss. and Ben Schwartz and Nicolas cage are there

Renfield (say it with me: it's about the growth)

Rebecca Quincy (girlboss)

Nicolas Cage (Dracula)

Tedward "Teddy" Lobo (yes that is his canonical name. he is played by Ben Schwartz and i love this goofy little fuck. i also hate him. it is a Blorbo specific love-hate thing)

The Therapist from the support group (have i forgotten his name? yes. does that matter? no. he has taken up a small corner of my brain and he is just a funky lil dude)

More to come as i inevitably continue to juggle several hyperfixations at a time, gaining them quicker than i lose them. wish me luck

i have decided to start keeping an ongoing list of Official Blorbos™️ of 2023 because i am collecting them left and right and there is so much coming out this summer.

Criteria:

a blorbo here is defined as a character who has wormed their way into one of the fandom cavities in my brain and are living there rent free for two weeks or longer weather or not i have actively engaged with their canon that day. this is can on their own as a character i'r as part of a ship that has started spreading brain spores

of 2023 means that the blorbage has to be active. i have many Blorbos already, all of whom i love. but this list is for blorbos who's dens are free of cobwebs and whose fields are watered since the start of the year

there probably will be multiple Blorbos per media, they are all my children and i will not pick favorites. and if i say favorite, ignore me i am excited

[a-small-batch-of-dragons]

Rise

Merlin prompt for you, you mystical purple dragon! I am absolutely obsessed w/your vulnerable Arthur fic 'Collapse': Arthur has been going through a particularly bad spell of symptoms with his heart when there's word of enemy mercenaries camping in Camelot's forests. He wants to go with the knights to fight them off, and Merlin pleads with him not to.

Thanks nonny for the prompt!

Read on Ao3 Part 1: Collapse

Pairings: Merthur can be platonic or romantic you decide

Warnings: none

Word Count: 3479

The first time Arthur collapses in the middle of the training ground Merlin’s heart leaps into his throat. He barely hears the roar of the other knights over the rush of blood in his ears as he scans the field, looking for something, anything, and rushing to Arthur’s side.

In other words: Arthur has a heart defect that none of them knew about. He and the rest of Camelot have to learn how to deal with it. 

That’s the last big blowout they have for a while. Arthur gets up after a few moments, stretching a little awkwardly and wrapping his arms around Merlin’s waist when he overbalances. Merlin coaxes him gently into his chair and fetches another quill, settling it in his hand and seeping the remnants away.

“No,” Arthur says when Merlin goes to throw them out, “keep them.”

Merlin pauses, his hand already outstretch to throw it away. “Are you sure?”

“I want to keep them.”

“…alright. Where should I—“ Arthur holds his hand out— “okay.”

Merlin doesn’t ask any more questions, just gets back to his chores. Pick up the laundry basket, tuck the sheets into the corner of the bed that always seem to come untucked first. Pull back the curtains, tie them tight. Check Arthur’s armor for repairs, not that there’s been as much need for that lately. Tuck the sheet in at the corner again. Dip outside to carry the basket to the laundresses. Come back with lunch. Sit Arthur down and have him eat.

“Sit with me,” Arthur says softly, catching hold of Merlin’s sleeve.

“I have to go get the—“

“Please?”

“You’re shamelessly taking advantage of the fact that I can’t say no to you when you say ‘please,’ aren’t you?”

“Oh, absolutely.”

Merlin sighs as he sits, watching as Arthur immediately digs into his own food with a gusto he hasn’t seen since…well.

“What,” Arthur asks, his mouth half-full, when he glances up and catches Merlin smiling at him, “is there something on my face?”

“…I haven’t seen you happy like that in a while.” He reaches out to pat Arthur’s collar back into place. “It makes me happy.”

Before, Arthur would scoff and turn back to his food, or if he were extremely happy, he’s toss something playfully at Merlin and say if he did his job better, he’d see Arthur like this more of the time.

Instead, Arthur just smiles softly and the food turns bittersweet in his mouth. After a moment, he picks up a goblet of pear juice and slides it over to Merlin.

“Here, you should eat too.”

“I’m not that—“ the protest dies on his tongue as Arthur gives him a look— “well don’t hog all the sausages.”

“Oh, going back to stealing my sausages, are we?”

“It’s not stealing if they’re going to a more worthy cause.”

“Putting aside the fact that you are skinny enough to be blown over by a draft of wind—“

“Oi!”

“—that’s not how stealing works.”

“How would you know?”

“The hours I just spent drafting laws and reading the resolutions say that’s how I know.”

“Prat.”

“Idiot.”

“Pass the apples?”

“Green or red?”

“Red.”

“Good. Green’s my favorite.”

“I know.”

It’s not easy but it’s getting better.

The knights, even though they still train as hard as they ever did, have altered their own routines in a way even Merlin disbelieves sometimes. Here’s the thing; Merlin knows the Knights of the Round Table. He knows they would die for their king in an instant and their loyalty rivals even that of Merlin’s sometimes.

He just didn’t realize they were as willing to live for Arthur as they were to die for him.

Out of all of them, Gwaine’s change is the most significant. He barges into Arthur’s chambers with a disrespect that almost shoulders Merlin’s insubordination out of the way. Gwaine waltzes in, plants a tankard of mead on the table, and props his dirty boots not he polished wood like it isn’t Merlin’s job to clean it.

“No, no,” Merlin sighs when Gwaine tracks mud all the way in, “please, ruin eight hours of work in two seconds, be my guest.”

“Thanks, Merlin,” Gwaine says with a wink.

“What is it this time, you forget something?”

“Oh no, I’ve just got some questions for the man that thinks it’s a good idea to not give the men a day off for the rest of the week.”

“You’ve just had two days off,” Arthur says with a sigh, rubbing his forehead, “and I’m also fairly certain you were groaning about having too much time off two days ago.”

Gwaine shrugs. “Well, I’ve reconsidered.”

Merlin rolls his eyes as Arthur starts bickering with Gwaine. Of course, he knows why Gwaine’s doing this.

Gwaine and Arthur have never seen eye to eye on a lot, but that sure as hell doesn’t mean the two men aren’t fiercely loyal to each other. Arthur is the first noble in a long time to earn Gwaine’s respect, and Gwaine is the first man who has absolutely refused to be anything but honest with Arthur. It’s refreshing for the both of them,

“If you can explain why you’ve been going through shirts like Percival goes through sleeves—“

“You try squeezing that man into chainmail without a bucket of lard!”

“Where did you even get a bucket of lard?”

“Wait,” Merlin interrupts, staring hard at Gwaine, “is this why the kitchen’s food has been—“

“I’ve got no idea what you’re talking about.”

“Did you seriously—“

“You’ve got no proof.”

“You just said—“

“I said no such thing.”

“Will you even—“

“Let you finish?” Gwaine grins broadly and takes a huge bite of an apple. “Absolutely not.”

“You’re a menace,” Arthur sighs, chucking another apple into Gwaine’s open hand, “and the kitchens should ban you from the halls.”

“Oh, you know he and Percival will just be in the vent with a hook on the end of a string.”

“Wait, that was you?”

Percival isn’t as brash as Gwaine, nor is he as openly talkative as the rest of the knights. Instead, he starts picking up shifts as Arthur’s guards outside his door. Merlin gets a chance to see him more often as he’s no longer training with the knights, and Percival is always close by if Arthur needs to talk to one of his knights directly. Originally, there was some push back from one of the stewards who said that it was, er, ‘unbecoming’ of a knight to ‘demote’ himself to guard duty.

That didn’t last long.

Come on, it’s Percival. The man’s a horse-and-a-half by himself.

Arthur won’t say it out loud, but Merlin can see by the way his shoulders relax when they hear Percival outside that he’s happier when Percival is close. It’s hard not to feel safe around Percival, really, it is. Not only is the man easily twice the size of most would-be attackers, but he’s steadfast in a way that few men are. He’s never shy about offering his own insights when he feels they’re overlooking something important, but he chooses his words carefully. Most men of Arthur’s will say what they mean, Percival means what he says. There’s a difference there—not a big one, but a difference.

“Sire,” Percival says as Arthur calls him in, “Merlin.”

“Hello, Percival.”

“Ah! Percival! Just in time.” Arthur stands up from his desk. “How is the report coming?”

“Very well.” Percival sits down, all creaking chainmail and armor, on the chair nearest the door. “I’ll have it into you by next week.”

“Have you spoken to the other guards?”

“I have. You were correct.”

Arthur nods, looking down at the desk and furrowing his brow. “The new regimen should be about ready to go by then…of course you will look it over before it is implemented.”

“Of course, sire.”

“Well,” Arthur says, clapping his hands, “you must at least join us for a drink.”

“I am still on—“

“There is no one better to keep me safe while I am having a drink,” Arthur interrupts softly as he starts to pour, “than Merlin and one of my most trusted knights.”

And if Percival starts to go a bit red from the drink a little faster than normal, well, no one’s about to say anything.

Lancelot offers counsel as often as he can. Merlin’s never one to turn away one of the knights at the door, nor is Arthur one to ignore the trusted word of his inner circle. Lancelot is by far the most…unchanged by the adaptation. He still addresses Arthur with the same tone as he did before, as though they’re all pretending that Arthur is taking an extended leave of absence. It’s nice, the stability of normality that keeps them all a little saner.

“And what of the people,” Arthur asks when Lancelot finishes giving an overview of the patrols that week, “do they seem…discontent? Upset?”

“On the contrary, Sire.” Lancelot shifts in his seat. “Ever since you have taken power and drawn back the guards, the people are happier. They walk about the streets with less fear, they trust the guards’ presence more in their space.”

“Good. And the provisions?”

“Those who could not sustain themselves before have an easier time cultivating a crop. With the assurance that the citadel will not leave them to die, they have time to ensure their own success.”

Arthur nods. “And we have had no issues with people taking offense to the offers of help?”

“None whatsoever.” Lancelot bows his head. “If I may, sire, this is the most prosperous I have seen this kingdom in all the years I have been here.”

“We are our people’s servants as much as they are ours,” Arthur says with a decisive nod, “we fail our duty if we do not support them.”

“Wiser words never spoken.”

Merlin’s doing his own little internal victory dance in the corner. The thought of Uther’s rage-filled face seeing his son meticulously undo everything he’s strived so hard to accomplish is enough to make him grin out of pure spite. And a good helping of pride.

“What’re you grinning about over there,” Arthur says suddenly, “you win a wager?”

“As a matter of fact—“

“No, no,” Arthur says quickly, “don’t tell me. I’m not getting swooped up in Gwaine’s mess again.”

Lancelot rolls his eyes. “I’m still finding hay in my chain mail.”

“Me too.” Arthur shoots a glance at Merlin. “You’d think it’d be better cleaned.”

Merlin raises an eyebrow. “If you think you could do better, then by all means.”

Lancelot hides his snort in his goblet.

When Arthur is allowed to go outside—with Merlin by his right, of course, and at least one of the guards a few paces behind just to run for Gaius if need be—he typically goes down to visit Gwen and Elyan in their father’s forge. Since the…change, Elyan asked permission to take a more active role in the blacksmithing aspect of their family. Morgana, as was to be expected, allowed Gwen to work at the forge with a smile and a favor: Morgana’s armor, sat unused since Uther forbade her training, was to be repaired and ready for her to use.

There were no objections, not that any would’ve lasted long.

Elyan meets them at the door of the forge, smiling and wiping sweat off his brow. “Good to see you two, glad you could make it.”

“Always happy to come see you,” Arthur says, clapping him on the shoulder, “by all means, show us what you have today.”

“Just small improvements, Gwen’s got the big things.” Elyan takes them through to the storage area, where the heat from the forge doesn’t threaten to sear their eyebrows off. Merlin’s learned his lesson. “Adjusted breastplates for the archers, different gauntlets for Percival, and a leather tunic designed to increase insulation for the colder months.”

“And you say you haven’t done anything.”

“Oh, just you wait until Gwen’s done.”

Sure enough, Gwen emerges a moment later, tired and sweaty from her time near the open fire, but a triumphant grin on her face. She waves when she sees Arthur and Merlin. “It’s done!”

Merlin’s eyes widen. “Morgana’s armor?”

“Well, it’s got to wait a little bit until she can actually try it,” Gwen huffs, setting her tools aside, “but yes. That should be the last big step.”

Merlin rushes forward to seize her in a hug. Elyan just chuckles. “That’s our Gwen.”

Arthur nods. “That’s our Gwen.”

“Alright, alright,” Gwen mumbles, “enough. You’re all worse than Morgana.”

“Oh, no, she’s going to do much more than we are.”

“I know, I know.” Gwen’s hands fidget a little. “…I know.”

“Alright,” Elyan says quickly, what else did you need to see?”

“Right.”

Then there’s Leon.

Merlin can’t really do much but watch those two, when they walk through the halls together, when they sit at Arthur’s desk and talk, when they stride in council meetings with Leon at Arthur’s left. They’ve known each other since, well, since Arthur was a boy.

There are secrets between them, secrets Merlin would never dare ask of them, that pulls them together in a way that no one else could ever hope to understand. And that paints everything they do now in a fine shade of gray.

Merlin can see the way Leon looks at Arthur. It’s the way he’s seen Gaius look at him sometimes when he thinks Merlin isn’t paying attention, or the way he remembers his mother looking at him. He can see the way Arthur looks at Leon, the way Merlin looks at Gaius or Gwen.

He sees the clever way Leon is always right next to Arthur whenever any of the lords come to visit, ready with a hand hidden beneath the cloak or a quick word when Arthur needs a moment.

Leon is the only person aside from Morgana that Merlin trusts enough to leave in Arthur’s chambers, alone.

Speaking of which, there’s probably a reason Uther never let Arthur, Leon, and Morgana be alone in the same room, other than his arrogance and dismissal of Morgana as a woman.

Between Morgana’s sharp wit and diplomatic skill, Arthur’s stubbornness and determination, and Leon’s knowledge of exactly how to make the court do what they want, it’s only a matter of time before cruel laws are being overturned and the people are happier than they’ve ever been under Uther.

Camelot prospers under Arthur’s rule, not because of his proficiency with a blade, but his duty to his people.

That doesn’t mean it’s not without struggles.

When the first patrol goes out around the border, Arthur’s heading for the armor cabinet before Merlin can stop him. He opens it and starts pulling on his tunic, only to look around and realize Merlin’s not there.

“Well? Help me get it on.”

“You’re not going, Arthur,” Merlin says softly.

“What? Of course I am, it’s the border trip.”

“I know what it is,” Merlin says, walking a little closer, “and you’re not going.”

“Give me one reason why you think I shouldn’t go!”

As a response, Merlin simply nods toward Arthur’s hand on the cabinet door. Sure enough, as soon as Arthur looks, they can both see it’s starting to shake.

Arthur swallows heavily.

“…it’s just a ride,” he mutters after a moment, “it’s not a fight.”

“You don’t know it won’t turn into one.”

“The border patrol is safe.”

“Patrols are never safe.”

“I have to go,” Arthur explodes, looking at Merlin with such ferocity that Merlin almost takes a step back, “it’s my duty, I have to—to—“

Merlin winces and rushes forward. He catches Arthur as Arthur starts to slump, politely ignoring the muffled curse when Arthur remembers that he can’t shout anymore.

“I have to,” Arthur mumbles brokenly, “I have to go…I have to go…”

“Shh, shh,” Merlin hushes, “come on, breathe.”

“I’m fine.” Arthur waves him off before Merlin can tell him that he is not, in fact, fine. “I just—I—it’s—“

He slumps.

“Arthur?” Merlin quickly switches his grip, cupping Arthur’s face in his hand. “Arthur, can you hear me?”

“I can hear you.”

Merlin breathes a sigh of relief. “Alright. Then tell me what’s wrong.”

“Aside from the fact that I can’t even bloody shout anymore?”

“Aside from that.”

Arthur closes his eyes, letting Merlin lean him back against the cabinet. After a moment, he opens them again.

“For as long as I can remember,” he mumbles, “I’ve—there’s…there has always been one thing I can do to protect my kingdom.”

Merlin listens, crouching down in front of him.

“If I can…if I can just be there,” Arthur continues, his brow furrowing, “if I can be there, if…if I can see what happens, if I can—if I can be another pair of eyes, ears, hands…then that’s enough.”

Outside a horse brays.

“If I was just a someone who saw, who could—who could try and make sure things got better because I was there, then—then that was enough.”

Arthur swallows and his eyes glisten.

“And here, I can be here. I can still stand up for those who cannot stand for themselves, I can support my knights when I can’t fight alongside them.” He glances toward the window. “But out there…when they leave…I can’t be there.”

“They can take care of themselves,” Merlin reminds gently.

“I know they can, I’ve never doubted that for a second.” Arthur looks down. “But I don’t know if…”

“If what, Arthur?”

“If I could stand not letting them be seen.”

Oh.

Oh.

Merlin swallows heavily. Arthur…courageous, noble, silly Arthur.

“You see them in how you listen,” Merlin says instead, “in how you trust their judgment and seek their counsel. You see them in how you let them barge into your quarters and how you make sure they aren’t afraid to tell you when you’re wrong.”

He takes a breath and leans closer, watching Arthur’s eyes follow him.

“You see them in the way you still take Gwaine out for a drink,” he whispers, “you see them in the way you take Percival’s side in arguments, in how you never let Lancelot believe he’s any less than deserving, in the way Elyan gets to run his family’s forge with his sister by his side.”

Arthur tilts his head.

“And you see them in how Leon has never loved Uther the way he loves you.”

Arthur surges forward and bundles Merlin clumsily into his chest.

“You see them,” Merlin promises breathlessly as he clutches Arthur back, “and they see you, I promise, I promise.”

They stay there, curled up on the floor, until Percival knocks and immediately goes to fetch the others. Gwaine storms right over and scoops Merlin up in his arms, laughing when Percival immediately has to come over and grab Arthur too because they won’t let go of each other. Elyan sets a fire going as Lancelot tugs down a series of blankets and pillows from…somewhere, Merlin’s not quite sure. Leon has a word with the guards outside as they settle in front of the fire.

“Are you alright, sire,” Lancelot says softly, “do we need to get Gaius?”

“Merlin?”

“No,” Arthur mumbles as Gwaine checks in on Merlin, “no, we’re—we’re fine.”

“What happened?”

Merlin gives Arthur a nod. Arthur sighs, buries his head in Merlin’s shoulder, and explains, mumbling most of it into Merlin’s tunic.

“You’re an idiot,” Gwaine murmurs as he finishes, ruffling Arthur’s hair, “if you think that’s what makes us follow you.”

“You’re all here for Merlin, I know.”

“As true as that may be,” Gwaine says, ruffling Merlin’s hair too, “if we were just here for Merlin we’d’ve dragged him off ages ago.”

“You could try.”

“The point Gwaine is trying to make,” Elyan says, shoving Gwaine’s shoulder, “is that we’re here for you too.”

“And that means we won’t think any less of you. For any reason.”

Percival nods at Lancelot’s words, laying a hand on Arthur’s shoulder. “Your world is my world.”

Arthur glances around, not believing the words he hears from his knights, only for his gaze to land on Leon. Leon kneels down behind Merlin and pats Merlin’s shoulder. With one last squeeze, Merlin moves away.

Leon opens his arms. “I’ve seen you grow,” he says, “through Uther, through Agravine, and through yourself.”

Arthur stares up at him, wide-eyed.

“I’ve seen you fall, Arthur,” Leon whispers, “but I’ve also seen you rise.”

It takes only a little nudge from Percival before Arthur’s hugging Leon as fiercely as he can.

“Alright,” Gwaine claps, “now, have I told you lot the story of the great tavern fight in Mercia?”

“Several times.”

“Just yesterday.”

“You told me three hours ago.”

“Ah, but I have yet to tell you of the other great battle of Mercia. You see, the lass had just brought me this incredible wedge of cheese…”

When the stories have run out and their cups have run dry, and Elyan and Leon have made the beds in front of the fireplace as comfortable as they can—including dragging Arthur’s truly ridiculously big mattress onto the ground too—the knights bed down, around their king.

Camelot has never been safer.

[shut-up-merlin]

Hold your horses, the 100 fans!

How are we supposed to get ANY closure if there’s only one episode left!?

Judging by the state of this fandom, I’m one of a few people who is actually excited about most of what happened this season. This show has always been unpredictable and that is something we have definitely seen this season.

Spoilers and hypotheses:

We have so much to do and so little time to do it. Last episode gave us a bunch of cliffhangers and they aren’t the only loose ends that need tying up. 

Bellamy isn’t dead. I refuse to believe he is. We haven’t seen a funeral, a pyre or a corpse floating in space. He. Is. Not. Dead. But if he isn’t. I mean... since he isn’t, how on earth Sanctum/Bardo are they going to fix this mess? 

Then, on the subject of Bellamy. Bellarke Endgame, hello? Damn it. DAMN. IT. I’m sure I’ll get over it though. I’m a Merthur shipper. I will survive another ship that doesn’t leave the shore. 

That being said, is anyone getting an endgame here? Emori is dying really really badly hurt, but she’ll be fine. She has to. Where did Miller even go? We might have Hope and Jason, but that’s hardly something I ship, I mean... They’re cute and all but I’ll have some Octavia x Levitt any day of the week. 

If Emori dies, their tag is going to be In Memoriam and that’s the hill I’ll die on. Say it with me; In. Memoriam. Thanks.

Echo? Niyhla? Just.. gone? Also, we never buried Gabriel. That’s just sad. 

Sheidheda was badass last episode. He had his moment. I doubt he’ll just lie low now, but that was actually pretty fun. “Attention sheep, I’m here to kill your shepherd.” I died. But he can stay quiet now so we can focus on

MADI. MADI KOM LOUWODA KLIRON KRU. What. The. Hell. She is the bravest soul, and now she’s literally just that. No control over her body. Damn it. Do you think they’ll put her on a mind drive and put her in Clarke’s body when Clarke leaves hers to take the final test? She did shine though, this episode, especially when she channeled her inner Clarke and told Cadogan to go float himself. That was so good. You know Clarke taught her that. It’s not something Grounders ever said. So she’s using the worst insult Clarke has taught her. And I love her even more for it. Were those her last words? Shit, I think they were. 

Speaking of last words, I feel like there are so many characters who still haven’t quite wrapped up. There’s what’shername from Elegius IV (you know, the blonde who almost killed Raven over the lover Raven might have melted...), Indra, Gaia, ... AND 

RAVEN. REYES. Who is currently taking The Gang™ back to Sanctum so she can heal Emori. She will, by the way. Emori is going to live and give birth to a beautiful Memori-baby. We can’t do this to John. Or me. But mostly John.

And then. Then there is T H E   L A S T   W A R . And the whole debate on whether or not it’ll be Octavia. Or Clarke. Or shithead Cadogan who takes the test. And what the test will even be. I am so confused. So worried. 

And so extremely excited. 

The 100 has been a show I’ve followed since the very beginning in 2014 and I’ll be sad to see it end. I am grateful to the creators who made it what it was. No matter how much hate they’re getting right now, and whether or not that is deserved is not even the question here, so please don’t start a fight in the comments!, there is no denying they have created something amazing, which is the reason everyone is so emotional about what is happening right now. 

If they hadn’t portrayed great characters, you wouldn’t have been upset over any of them dying. And that’s the hill I’ll die on, just as long as they leave my poor babies alone. 

[supercalvin]

Hey! First I want to tell you how much I adore the things you write! You’re honestly so talented and I love your Merthur fics sooo much!! And now for the prompt thing, it’s kind of basic but if you could write something about merthur running away to live in a farm (On canon era)? Thank you! Stay safe

I had a bigger idea for this that I might expand into a longer fic one day. But who knows if that will ever happen. So here is this instead!

Prompts + Ficlets

Edit: now with a PART TWO

***

Merlin woke in a cold sweat, gasping as if he had been drowning. This was the third dream in as many days. First, he had dreamt of Gaius, sitting by a fire in a small house on the outskirts of the lower town. Merlin hadn’t thought much of it. Then next night he had dreamt of Lancelot, seeing him in Camelot’s red and gold, with Gwen by his side. The dream had made him sad, but nothing too worrisome. Tonight, Merlin had dreamt of Morgana. She was sitting on Camelot’s throne, Camelot’s knights at her feet, and Excalibur in her hand.

Gaius scolded Merlin for not telling him about the dreams sooner. Merlin defended himself, saying he hadn’t thought they were visions of the future. He wasn’t a Seer after all. Perhaps they were visions of a possible future.

“But Lancelot…” Merlin said, his voice trailing off and his heart sinking. “It must have been Gwen’s dream…”

Gaius shook his head, “I will try to find some explanation today. Now off you go before Arthur comes looking for you.”

Merlin thought about mentioning the dreams to Arthur. It had been a year since Merlin had told Arthur of his magic. Although Arthur had come to understand Merlin’s decisions, Merlin feared these visions would be too similar to Morgana’s nightmares for Arthur to trust them.

That night, Merlin went to sleep and almost as soon as he closed his eyes, he was opening them again. Except this time he wasn’t in his room, but in an open field. He blinked at the bright sky above him. Where was he? He wandered down the rows of wheat until he came across a small cottage. Merlin squinted and he could see a small village down the lane.

“There you are. Where have you been?”

Merlin turned around and was surprised to see Arthur. This far out in the country he had thought he might see Gwaine or Percival. He looked around, trying to see who Arthur was talking to, but no one else was around.

“What are you looking at? Close your mouth, you look like a startled stoat. Come on,” Arthur wrapped an arm around Merlin’s shoulders and tugged him along.

In his three previous dreams, no one had ever acknowledged him. He could walk around and speak, but it was like he wasn’t there at all. Merlin stumbled along, trying to piece together what was different. All his other visions were of places he had been before, but this place was completely unfamiliar. It must have been something of Arthur’s memories.

Arthur led Merlin to the cottage, but instead of going inside, Merlin was dragged around the side to where there were even rows of vegetables and herbs. Clucking and pecking between the plants was about a dozen chickens. Merlin blinked at the scene before him. It reminded him of Ealdor.

Arthur’s hand slipped to Merlin’s neck and playfully ran over Merlin’s hair.

“Look!” He said with the sort of smile Merlin so rarely saw. It wasn’t like the polite smile Arthur used with his counselors, or the comforting smile he used with while holding court, or even the roguish smile he used with his knights. It was a barely-there tilt of his lips with his eyes almost closed with mirth.

Merlin was so distracted that he didn’t see what Arthur was pointing at.

Arthur rolled his eyes and turned Merlin’s head to the back of the cottage, towards a lavender bush. Only one or two of the flower bundles had popped open to reveal the light purple blooms, but Merlin could tell it would be in full bloom in a few days.

“Lavender?” Merlin asked, looking at the plant. It had obviously been well kept, trimmed and watered.

Arthur stared at him as if he had grown two heads. “Aren’t you happy?”

“Uh,” Merlin gave a wary smile, “It’s very nice…?”

“Nice? You’ve been yammering about your stupid bush for weeks, waiting for it to bloom so you can dry it and use it in poultices, and now that it is, it’s just nice?”

Merlin opened his mouth, about to say that this couldn’t possibly be a vision. Merlin must have eaten something off before falling asleep. This couldn’t be Arthur’s vision for the future.

“This is my lavender bush?”

“Yes, of course it is. Did you think I dug up yours and put in a new one?”

Merlin looked down at Arthur, just now taking in the fact that Arthur wasn’t in chainmail. He wasn’t in his usual well-crafted clothes either. He was in a loose-fitting white shirt that was unlaced at the chest, exposing tanned skin. His boots were scuffed and his hands were dirty, as if he had just been working in the garden behind the house.

“I was feeding the girls when I saw the new blooms. I’ve been trying to find you for ages. Were you off in the woods practicing your magic?”

There was too much in that sentence to digest. All Merlin said in response was, “The girls?”

Arthur gestured to the chickens, as if that was the sane thing to do.

“Are you alright? You seem... off.” Arthur asked, before shaking his head, “No matter. Let’s go inside and we can have some of that rabbit stew you promised me.”

Arthur walked into the cottage, which must have been Merlin’s. Merlin looked at the lavender bush and the small cottage. Did Arthur… Did Arthur want Merlin to leave Camelot? Was his dream for Merlin to practice his magic where Arthur didn’t have to see it?

Merlin stepped into the cottage cautiously. The first room was a large space with a large pot hanging over a fire. There were shelves of food with a table that was cluttered with bottles and dried herbs. There was another smaller table off to the side which was obviously meant for eating. So far, it looked like a nice home. Merlin wouldn’t mind living in, if the dreaded feeling that Arthur wanted him gone wasn’t overwhelming him.

While Arthur went to look at the stew, Merlin quickly took at glance at the only other room. There was a bed, larger than Merlin had ever had. In the corner was a wardrobe and what made Merlin pause was the chest in the corner. It looked identical to the chest that sat in Arthur’s chambers. Then his eye caught on the table next to the bed. Excalibur was leaning against the bedside table.

“Merlin?”

Merlin turned on his heel to see Arthur leaning in the doorway.

“Looking for something?” He was smiling, his brows raising, almost as if to imply…

Merlin blinked at Arthur, his mind connecting the clues but not wanting to allow himself to believe it.

“The food will get cold if you dawdle any longer,” Arthur said, but he didn’t seem in a rush. No, in fact he seemed happy to take his time.

Happy. That was the feeling Arthur seemed to be radiating. Not the pride of Morgana’s vision, the love of Gwen’s, or the peace of Gaius’. He was so inexplicably happy, and Merlin had never seen him like this before. So at ease in his own skin.

Merlin opened his mouth, his throat closing with emotion.

“What is it, love?”

Merlin closed his eyes at the endearment that rolled off Arthur’s tongue so easily. So natural that Merlin’ heart ached at the sound. Merlin could feel himself shake. He tried to calm himself, knowing that too much emotion would likely wake him. He couldn’t risk that, not when he was so close to understanding.

“Merlin,” Arthur stepped up in front of Merlin so that they were eye to eye. “Is something wrong? You seem upset.”

Merlin opened his mouth, but no words came out.

Arthur’s dream was to be a farmer. A dirty farmer on the edge of some kingdom, with his knight’s armor piled in the corner, as if a forgotten past. Arthur’s impossible dream was to be here, in some unnamed village, with rabbit stew, and chickens, and…Merlin.

Merlin tried to keep an even expression, but he could feel his lips tremble, and Arthur began to blur as Merlin’s eyes watered.

A king could never be truly happy. It was a fact that both Merlin and Arthur had come to understand a long time ago. Merlin knew that Arthur would have to make choices that would weigh on him. Arthur had already lost so much through this war, and it was only the first step to a united Albion. They both had a weight on their shoulders that they could never escape.

Arthur reached out, his hand resting on Merlin’s neck, his fingers skimming into his hair. “Do you want to lie down?” Arthur asked, his voice so sweet that Merlin felt like he was about to choke on his own tears. “I’ll take the stew off the fire and we can lie down for a bit.”

Arthur turned to leave, but Merlin could not let him. He grabbed Arthur’s tunic, his fingers clenched in the thin white fabric, holding him in place.

“Don’t go,” Merlin whispered, ashamed at how desperate he sounded.

“Oh, love. What happened?” Then Merlin was being wrapped in Arthur’s arms. He could barely feel those strong arms wrap around him, his face being pressed to Arthur’s neck, before his eyes opened and he felt his own small bed underneath him.

He choked out and raised his hand to his face to find that he had started crying in his sleep.

“Merlin?” Gaius rushed into the room and when he saw Merlin, he sighed. He sat on the edge of the bed, “Oh, my boy.” Merlin let Gaius wrap an arm around him, feeling ashamed at his tears. Only the night before he had dreamt of Morgana taking the throne and that hadn’t thrown him into a fit. But a single lavender bush and an uninhibited smile from Arthur, and he was trying to keep himself from falling apart entirely.

“It’ll be alright, it was only a dream.”

If only Gaius knew that Merlin wished it wasn’t.

***

PART TWO

Prompts + Ficlets

[coinofstone]

5x08 The Hollow Queen

What's Gwen doing out patrolling with the knights (jk I realize they're likely escorting her but it's still funny to think of her randomly deciding to join patrol when age wants to go for a walk or something)

I don't quite understand the correlation between the moon phase and frog catching but then I've never seen a wild frog in my life either. I did get kinda snooty when he said that tho cuz I'm like "she asked where you're going, not where you've been" 🤦‍♀️

Part of me wants to snark that this feels like it's about to be their first time actually boning, but the way Gwen casually calls for a hot bath... does she mean... after? Or....???

Stop he's like an angry barman 😂😍

Out of all the things I hate in S5, the way Gaius' chamber is lit is probably top 3, behind only the disrespect with which Gwen's character was treated all season and the fact that Arthur dies without restoring magic to Camelot, thus robbing us of the opportunity to watch King Arthur and Court Sorcerer Merlin handle various hilarious situations for at least a full thirteen episode season.

Yea this show is all medieval fantasy and whatever but Arthur, the grown ass man, not being able to find some very basic daily item that's right under his nose while standing helplessly in front of 'the clothing chair' and looking for someone to help him is tooooooo goddamn accurate.

There's no valid reason for this gif I just kept rewinding it so much I figured I might as well just gif it so I could watch it on a loop

Actually I guess I could use this moment to point out that since Arthur and Guinevere are married, we don't get the domestic morning scenes with Merlin walking Arthur up and helping him get dressed - presumably because they want to imply that Arthur's chambers is now *their* chambers, even though literally nothing has been done to it to suggest it's a shared space - beyond of course the one time we see Gwen's dresses hanging in Arthur's wardrobe and the extra changing screen. But there's no vanity, no second wardrobe ... it's really a very silly thing they're doing and I'm not entirely certain if it was intentional or overlooked or what. Sharing a bed chamber wasn't a common thing as far as I know, and even still a Queen needs a chamber of her own, even if the show wants to portray them as co-sleeping in Arthur's bed. It's just weird and inconsistent and I don't like it. Arthur's inability to dress himself, however - THAT I believe.

(Gif is from a S4 deleted scene)

Of course Morgana would tempt Merlin away from Camelot with tales of a Druid child in distress.

Gwen in that red queen outfit tho 😍

So, a couple things here. First off, this kid Daegal being like, "why are you being nice to me" to Merlin 😭 Second, Morgana leaving that kid alive is super ooc.

Merlin's little eyeroll when the kid tells him he thinks Morgana and Gwen intend to kill Arthur 😂

I love bamf Merlin

I don't particularly understand like... what Gwen is expecting to happen as Merlin is serving them dinner and Arthur brings up Merlin's girl. Like... she knows it's bullshit. At the end of the day despite everything that's happened, Morgana and therefore Gwen still don't know about Merlin's magic - they want him dead because a) Morgana knows he's thwarted her plans before and b) they know he knows or suspects Gwen - but how does she expect to play this off? 'Oh I assumed you were out shirking your responsibilities so I made up a girl to cover for you? Like??? What???

Commentary by Bradley and Alice

Wow they don't even record the commentary in order

Oh they actively cut the more 'suggestive' romantic scenes - like Arthur throwing Gwen onto the bed. That's like ... a lot more sensitive than I would've expected.

Omg Alice 😂 "what is it, Arwen? It's Arwen isn't it? Arthur/Gwen? Oh are you not with the speil? Merthur?"

Bradley: "I stay away from the spiel."

Alice: "oh come ON, Bradley get with the..."

Bradley: "I stay away from all that. For my own good."

Alice: "oh yea it probably is, actually."

Stop the name of the actor who plays Daegal is Alfie

I went to go follow Alice on Twitter and I spent an hour scrolling bullshit

They're saying Merlin wasn't cancelled, the BBC had asked for more but they said no because they'd planned to end it there

But they're also saying that S5 was great so I know they're lying on here

Bradley saying he wants to do theater but I don't think he's actually done any?

Omg Alice asking if he's seen Richard III and saying she went with Colin Katie and Rupert to see it but realizing they didn't invite Bradley and the awkward apology 😂😂😂😂

Alice said whose your favorite knight you can't offend then more than you have already 😂

Tomiwa was the smartest knight 😂

They're completely ignoring the episode and Alice is essentially interviewing Bradley with questions off Twitter

They had an awards thing at the wrap party? Oh it was awards made by Bradley it must've been for a joke

Alice just described the perilous lands episode as 'questy knighty' and suddenly I understand why I like her so much