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pomp-and-circumstance · 4 years ago

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Episode 112.

Be still my heart. (AKA shit got real but first we’re going to talk about feelings.)

Jester checks in with Yasha about the death of Mollymauk and the revival of his body, which, in true Jester fashion, turns into her asking Yasha about Beau and her feelings. This was really interesting for me to watch because Jester witnessed Yasha tell everyone in the previous episode that the mirror “would be useful,” but once she insinuates they share a bed, without any kind of sexual vibe, Yasha turns into a flustered, stammering mess. Who better to gently lead Yasha through this than Jester herself, who immediately gets that there’s something deeper going on here than an interest in a one night thing. Her teasing playfulness turns into a beautiful kindness, and she gets to see, for the first time, the woman who fell in love once a long time ago.

There’s a lot of this that feels key for me here, and I haven’t had a lot of coffee this morning, but Imma try and get my thoughts in order anyway.

Only two people in the Nein know the deep heartache Yasha suffers from losing Zuala: Caduceus and Jester. Jester watched the painful guilt slowly reveal itself from “you’re chosen a mate, but I fell in love with someone else” to “I don’t know where she’s buried, but I have so many flowers to bring her.” She’s watched Yasha suffer over and over again, but here she bears witness to something truly unique - Yasha overwhelmed with the butterflies in the stomach one gets when they really care. On top of all that, Yasha doesn’t know what to do, because of course she doesn’t know what to do. The only other relationship she had in her life had to be in secret. It’s kind of a wonder she’s admitting any of this to Jester in the first place, but that she’s doing so says a lot, and Jester doesn’t miss a moment of that.

Enthusiastic Cheerleader Laura Bailey engages in some kind hearted teasing that basically oozes with it’s okay, Yasha, this is supposed to be fun energy. The two of them are suddenly teenagers at a sleepover talking about a crush and the best way to leave a note in their locker. “You don’t get nervous easily. If you’re getting flustered, that says something. Maybe I should leave.”

“No no! I don’t feel like I’m ready!”

“Okay! I’ll stay in the room!” (God bless you Jester, and your kindness.)

“... shit, I don’t know what to do!”

Watching Yasha discover that it’s okay to be vocal about these kinds of things is such an adventure. She’s so concerned with overstepping a boundary with Beau, but is too nervous to take a chance and see what that boundary even is, or if it even exists. (”I feel like I shouldn’t know this because it’s not from her, you know?... I just, she-she-she-she-she makes me so nervous.” This same woman tore the wings off Obann’s back.) Watching Jester try to hold back her excitement for her friends is like watching a hyperactive puppy run in the park for the first time. It’s such a complete disaster of a conversation that is so relatable and almost awkward to watch until Yasha opens up and becomes just that much more vulnerable.

“She makes me sweaty and, like, warm and fuzzy at the same time, and then I see her do things and them I’m just like, I want to--I want to kiss her so bad. And then that makes me feel kinda bad.”

I had to stop and think about this for a second because the first thing that came to mind was, of course, some kind of Dope Monk Shit Beau had done in the past that would make Yasha think this, but if she’s so adamant that her role is to protect, I don’t feel like she’d let something like that distract her in the heat of battle. (I may be proven wrong later, who knows, I’m mostly saying I don’t think she’d grab Beau in the middle of the BBEG fight and kiss her or anything.) What I immediately thought of after, though, was the previous episode when Beau was trying to line things out to the Nein about her theories regarding the Nine Eyes. There’s a moment where Beau is being praised, and Yasha with a bit of awe in her voice goes, “That’s a breakthrough.” It’s so simple and so easily missed in the moment. (I believe Beau immediately turns it around on her and says she deserves credit for a point she made, which Yasha immediately deflects and says she didn’t come up with nearly the amount of theories Beau did.) I think Yasha is holding far more than awe in that moment. I think that’s a peek into a moment she wishes she could have kissed her, shown some kind of affection, something, to show how proud she is of Beau.

So, at the end, when she says “that makes me feel kinda bad,” I don’t think she’s talking about a leftover something with Zuala - though maybe she is, and that’s valid, she’s always going to love Zuala and moving on with grief is painful and hard, even if you’ve told yourself it’s okay to - I think she genuinely doesn’t know what to do, and open affection with someone isn’t something she’s used to doing, but on top of that, I also wonder if it means she doesn’t want to be quiet with Beau, in the sense that she doesn’t want to hide how she feels. She doesn’t want another romance with secrecy, she wants to be able to love loudly, and she might have permission, so to speak, to do that, but that doesn’t mean she knows what to do with it.

Going back to Laura for a second - watching her in this conversation is so interesting because I think she caught Ashley totally unprepared for a conversation like this, which is why parts of it are so awkward and why they’re giggling throughout a portion of it. (I don’t think she did it maliciously, I think she’s being Jester and Jester would be this forthright and Ashley was just like “well shit, here we go!”) Jester is trying to be a wingman in the way only Jester can be, and when it’s clear Yasha’s anxiety comes from nerves, she drops this beautiful nugget that’s got a lot of Jester but a lot of Laura, too:

“Yasha, you can’t feel guilty for how you feel. If she makes you feel happy, that’s a wonderful thing. That’s so rare.”

Laura’s face gets me every time. She’s digging into a deep place here, and she’s doing it gently. Someone made you happy once before, Yasha. You know what this feels like. You have a chance to have it again.

“It is so rare.”

And with three sentences, the entire dynamic of the conversation changes.

Yasha suddenly takes charge of this thing and starts making suggestions to Jester, telling her she feels like she’s been given a lot of confidence, “maybe stay in the room so it doesn’t seem obvious, I’ll sleep on the floor tonight and I’ll figure it out.” Sure doesn’t sound like someone who doesn’t know what to do to me. (I mean, it does, but you know what I'm saying.) Then, after being so nervous about knowing something she felt like she should have heard from Beau, Jester assures her “that’s not the vibe I got” and she runs with it. “It’s not? Ok ok.” She’s suddenly got some confidence in this tangle of nerves, but at least she’s going to make an attempt to do something about it.

(Marisha has a face here that kills me, btw, after Jester says Yasha should talk to Beau, and Yasha says yeah, it’s best to talk to the source:

“The source is waiting, babe, I got time.”)

Speaking of Marisha, her facial journey during this poem workshop is an experience best had on your own time. Screenshots can’t do it justice. I’m going to take one image and make it my phone’s background without any context, ‘cause “eyes so blue and hair so shorn on the sides” makes her lose her shit.

(Bonus Taliesin, who can’t even.)

What I didn’t realize, though, is how quickly Beau comes back into the room after this talk between Beau and Jester, which means Ashley has only moments to really push Yasha Nydoorin of Seven Charisma, and like the badass she is, she’s got it totally under control from the first flustered “Hello!”

Because understanding your feelings and coming to terms with them about someone else is one thing. Excecution, however... is something else entirely. And while playing a suave personality that can charm the socks off anyone is fun, going to that place where you stammer and talk too much and nothing makes sense is so much more endearing. It makes the little moments where you get things “right,” so to speak, so much more. And so much more to launch off of, as Yasha immediately caves back into that place when she realizes she reached out and touched the glitter on Beau’s face, oh shit, I don’t know what to do, umm, I’m tired I guess.

(Bonus Laura, who is so proud of Yasha for being bold and basically needs a Beauyasha membership card that reads 0001/2 at this point.)

But keep in mind, this flustered nonsense isn’t just from Yasha, it’s also from Beau, who, while a little tipsy, has zero liquid courage in this moment and is just as much a stammering mess as Yasha herself is. Even more noteable is when Yasha makes a joke about “schnuggling”... Beau is almost ready to take Yasha up on that offer. “I mean, I--” is Marisha’s exact quote before Yasha backpedals and says she’s kidding. (Yet another tiny example of Marisha letting Ashley take the lead, whether it was intentional or not.) Confident Beau who oozed with sexual prowess becoming an actual disaster under the flirtatious radar of Yasha is my favorite thing in the world. That was probably the longest space of time between waking and sleeping for either of them, and Jester got to bare witness to all of their growth in its beautiful, awkward, “oh god, just schnuggle already” glory.

Taliesin is the real MVP here, who said what I’ve been thinking every time I’ve watched highlights of this part, but didn’t know it actually happened until now, “I assume they all take a point of exhaustion because none of them sleep. Just lie there.”

Even Travis, Honorary Beauyasha Membership Card holder number 0001/2, is in on it.

I adore everything about this scene. We all need a little dash of disaster lesbians in our lives. It’s gonna be okay, you two. I promise.

#beauyasha #critical role #critical role spoilers #s2ep112 #yasha nydoorin #beauregard lionett #jester lavorre #ashley johnson #marisha ray #laura bailey #taliesin jaffe #i for one welcome our lesbian disaster overlords #new love is so scary #but so exciting #and I respect these guys so much for playing it as honestly as they can #every interaction has so much purpose from 100+ episodes of buildup and not a moment of it is wasted

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loquaciousquark · 4 years ago

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Talks Machina Highlights - Critical Role C2E113 (Oct. 27, 2020)

Good evening and good night, lovely people of the world! We’re on the internet and ready to go. Tonight’s guests are Travis Willingham and Sam Riegel. This will be calm, controlled, and sane, I can feel it. Brian points out it’s been seven months since either of them were on Talks. Oof. (Sam asks if it’s been going the whole time without him. Bigger oof.) Travis keeps sneaking bites out of an acai bowl or something and tries to look sneaky about it, and I laugh every time because he’s just...so big. He’s such a big person.

(Brian is wearing a lobstrosity shirt. He and Travis talk about Dark Tower for a bit; then Sam tries to get into the conversation: “Is that the thing from It?” Brian: “Is what the thing from It?” Sam: “Is that lobster the clown from It? I’m not very literate. Is that a Langolier? Is that a Shawshank?”)

Announcements: none! Maybe they just forgot. We’ve been talking about Sam’s spooky skeleton decorations for like five minutes. Brian suggests taking them to Travis’s house. Travis: “That’s the fastest way to get to the smell of burning plastic.” Brian: “Speaking of your girlfriend...”

On Avantika: Fjord wouldn’t call it a relationship as much as a casual sexual interaction. Not official! Super not official!!

The first sea voyage wasn’t great for Fjord, but he tried to be thoughtful about preparing for this one before they left: praying, kneeling at the bow of the ship, etc. He’s a little disappointed the Wildmother didn’t even throw him a “yo, fam” heads up.

They weren’t sure how to resolve the conflict at first, since Avantika went for Fjord rather than the crystal. No one expected it to get exposed in that way. Travis thought the necklace was a pocket dimension and was alarmed to learn it wasn’t. Travis wants it destroyed along with the third gateway, so until they are he won’t rest easy.

Everyone enjoyed watching them all fail on the battlefield again. (Sam: “You used [Counterspell] so effectively!”) Travis thought he’d said Thunder Step, which would imply Avantika was running, rather than Thunder Wave. Sam says it’s fine since none of them have that spell and he wouldn’t know it anyway.

It’s very difficult for Veth to find reasons to stay with the M9. She loves the adventures and making a difference, but she also wants to come home and have weekends and have a husband and life. “She’s a career girl!” He’s very excited about the possibilities of Caleb’s transportation effectively creating an easy commute for her. He also, as a player, doesn’t want to be the person who’s always leaving the party. “My characters wanna roam!”

Travis was fully tilted that Avantika might have gotten away right before the break. He doesn’t think he could have focused on Vess DeRogna’s task knowing Avantika had gotten away; he was seriously working out how Fjord would leave the party to go make a last stand at the third gate if she’d escaped.

Sam looooves how Matt plays Yeza, but it honestly makes him feel a little worse at how encouraging he is for Veth to chase her dreams. “He’s always like - go shine! Go blossom!” He wants to have the conversation about Yeza feeling a little ignored. It’s fun to share the tales of adventures with Luc & Yeza.

Travis says there’s no way it’s Molly--it’s all Lucien. They don’t know if it was a resurrection, if he’s undead, possessed, etc. Everyone--everyone--rags on Taliesin’s accent work. Brian surreptitiously claims Ashly was brought on to relieve him of the burden of the accent. Poor Ashly, ha!

Initially, Travis landed on the Oath of the Ancients, but it had more nature & pacifism in it than he felt fit Fjord very well. Many of them also had a focus on good & lawfulness, which also didn’t feel quite right; he also wasn’t that vengeful for some of the others. He & Matt got together and discussed options. Matt asked what Travis liked about Fjord; Fjord’s love for the ocean was a huge part of it, since Travis himself also loves the ocean & scuba diving, and so Matt created a custom oath for him. Travis does not plan to post its details, but he thinks Matt will at some point.

Cosplay of the Week! a lovely Scanlan by Air Bubbles Cosplay! Sam tells us the “canon” Scanlan cosplay was actually borrowed hodgepodge, and the boots were falling off all day.

It was really cool to see how Yeza & Luc have made a home in Nicodranas. Felderwin was okay, but kind of your basic D&D fishing village, and she likes the Nicodranas is much better. She’s confident & comfortable knowing her family is safe and sound.

Why is Fjord so interested in finding Sabian? To him, post-orphanage, his time with Vandren was the best of his life & the most love he’d ever received, because he mattered & had worth. It was taken by someone he’d known basically his whole life, so Fjord is not going to let that go. “That fuckin’ bill needs to be paid, my friend.”

Sam acknowledges that he should NOT have looked at his phone in re: the Vilya reveal, but it was pretty surprising! He can’t believe none of them recognized it! Travis points out the M9 had never met, heard of, or known anything about Vilya, so it’s not that surprising. Brian points out Matt has also done a really good job keeping the two campaigns separate, so any references were tasteful. Sam marvels that it was so well done: it was tasteful, had emotional and story impact... “That Matt. He’s getting better!”

Liam texted Sam back something like “oh SHIT.”

Knowing Veth had a chance to help someone else return to her child made Veth feel almost karmically forgiven for being away from her kid, but it also made Veth a little guilty--”this lady wants to desperately return home, shouldn’t I want to go home too?” Caleb’s teleportation spell couldn’t have come a better time.

Sam wants Caleb & Astrid to get back together (well, he says “hump each other”), and Dani’s eyebrows climb off her forehead. Veth/Nott really thinks Caleb needs to have a roll in ze hay, and feels like after meeting her that there is a kindness or vulnerability to her that could be worthwhile. Travis thinks she feels like someone tethered, that it feels like she has a bomb or something in her chest that’ll explode if she tries to leave. Sam thinks Eadwulf is super cool. None of these names are spelled like I think.

Travis found the dinner super frustrating, because he felt Caleb was trying to walk a diplomatic line and he just wanted to backhand Trent.

Fjord is still coming to terms with his feelings for Jester, and the feelings are definitely real, but there’s a lot of timing that he’s considering and he also wants to figure out what the relationship is like outside of constant tension and battle. Fjord is also having trouble figuring out how to exercise the ability to display affection as well since he’s never received them, and is feeling out how to give and receive them. “It’s fine now, because he’s feeling it, but once you say it out loud, or once you come to a point where you make it known to the other side, then what happens? It might be ruined. It might be broken. Or it might not be!” The moment with the porcelain unicorn was too good not to try. Travis also sighs that he’s not a romance D&D guy, “but now I am! Fuckin’ Laura Bailey!” He’s definitely feeling it out and will see how it unfolds in the game.

If Jester hadn’t let go of the Traveler, Fjord would have either attacked the Traveler or the Moonweaver and tried to kick them both off.

Sam doesn’t think the Traveler’s realized yet what a dick he is. Brian thinks it may not happen in this campaign, but agrees the full weight of what he deserves hasn’t been felt yet. Travis: “Yeah, he came to the edge, but it didn’t cost him anything.” Brian: “Yeah, he’s a real edgelord.”

Fanart of the Week! a beautiful portrait of Molly in the snow by @claygryphon on twitter.

Veth acknowledges that they work for shady people with shady pasts, so Vess DeRogna isn’t her first rodeo, but this time it’s personal. It’s Jaws 2: Electric Boogaloo. Sam can’t commit to actual actions, since Vess is like level 20 or something, but “I will get some kinda revenge. Be it petty or significant, I will get revenge.”

How are they feeling about being in Eiselcross? They’ve only just landed, so not sure yet. The cold is intimidating. They’re excited to explore a new island that’s part of Wildemount, especially with the river of lava running through it. “It’s icy with lava? Sounds like a Dairy Queen.”

There’s still a ton of unknowns regarding the Tombtakers, Vess, the nature of their job, and who’s here on whose orders. They’re excited to see how it’s all going to play out. Travis laughs that he doesn’t take notes, he’s just here to fight things. It just washes over him when Matt starts talking about names and places. “It’ll reveal itself in time. [...] I don’t write those notes down. I don’t even know how to spell it off the bat.” I have never identified more with Travis. Sam actually does pay attention and take notes and was really impressed by Marisha’s dive.

Veth became interested in branding her own spellcraft as soon as she saw Caleb doing it. “That’s what the influencer agents are gonna be looking at. It would be nice to leave the world better than we found it, but also with some branded spells.”

What were Fjord’s thoughts on dropping so much money on the ring & the Ioun stone? It wasn’t about money for Fjord, it was about a cool thing to acquire. It’s why he saves money in his campaign. Caleb needs “as much of a flak jacket as he can get.” He also REJECTS the idea of buyer’s remorse on the ring and touts the effectiveness it’ll have on the lava river.

Travis talks about his old coins - a 340AD coin he bought at a ren faire and a 120BC coin that was a gift from a friend.

Sam marvels at the love and thought that Caleb put into the tower. Sam points out they forgot to go to the top two floors altogether. Travis: “Did the mansion get as much careful planning from Scanlan as the tower did from Caleb?” Sam: Absolutely not. But they were still thinking small in C1, figuring out how things went, and they didn’t have as much detail in their heads yet.

And that’s all the time we have for tonight! We end on everyone whispering way too close into their mics and tapping fingernails on mason jars. A fitting end to this crazy episode, I think.

Is it Thursday yet?

#talks machina #talks machina spoilers #critical role #critical role spoilers #long post for ts

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c-is-for-circinate · 4 years ago

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Okay, I’m gonna talk about my Jester Theory and every shipper in the fandom on every side is gonna hate it but whatever, I think it holds up and I find it both in-character and very intriguing.

Theory: Jester is on some level aware of the fact that half her party is or has been seriously crushing on her, whether or not she’s choosing to admit it to herself. Jester has been actively throwing up road blocks to all possible suitors, again, whether or not she’s choosing to admit it to herself. She has absolutely not said any of this out loud, because those would be hard conversations that would hurt her friends and she loves her friends and oh god she could never, and maybe if they just get over their crushes on their own she won’t ever have to!

Jester has a passive wisdom of 15. This may not be enough to 100% discern crushes directly towards her specifically, but it absolutely is enough to notice when people she knows are feeling conflicted or awkward in response to certain things. Jester also hates confrontation with her friends or ever admitting to bad feelings of her own that might make them feel bad.

Jester has been president and head shipper of the Beau/Yasha shippers association since about the instant Yasha returned to their side from Obann. There’s absolutely an element of ‘I want my friends to be happy!’ in it, and ‘I love the magic of romance!’, but man she is intense about it. It makes an interesting contrast to the Jester who was so determined to keep being Beau’s roommate that they ended up sharing a bedroom even when the M9 found themselves in possession of an entire mansion, who ended up sad and worried about Beau being angry with her when Beau suggested separate rooms after the Obann fight to begin with.

We don’t even see the level of ‘my friends are getting together and not paying as much attention to me any more’ slight jealousy that I might expect from Jester. She’s just aggressively shipping it. And there could be many reasons for that, but it also fits very consistently with a Jester who’s delighted that her friends could be together and happy and not putting her in the awkward position of having to formulate a rejection ever again.

And then there’s Caleb. One thing I’ve noticed over several past episodes (though not last night) is a tendency for Jester to create really awkward situations for Caleb in light of his crush. I’m thinking about ‘here, come lay down on my bed right where I would’ve laid when I was a kid--so you can see the mural I painted, obviously, not for any other reason, why would you even think that?’ These are things that could be flirty, if Jester and Caleb were actively flirting, but definitely don’t feel flirty. They feel like Laura Bailey fucking with Liam O’Brien. Which means that, by extension, they feel a little like Jester fucking with Caleb in a very slightly passive-aggressive sort of way.

These little flirtations don’t make Caleb happy. Mostly they make him uncomfortable, and Jester has to have noticed that, because that’s the kind of thing Jester notices in other people and either deliberately avoids or deliberately leans into! So maybe Jester’s just poking Caleb’s buttons for fun, which is totally in-character for her, but even when she pokes at people’s buttons like that there’s usually a reason. It doesn’t feel like a ‘I want you to like me back enough to actually say it’, to me. It feels like, ‘I want you to stop being weird around me and I am going to keep poking at you until you get over whatever it is and stop.’

Jester may or may not realize that it’s Caleb’s crush feelings making him feel uncomfortable, but if she has, the whole thing feels to me a little like a deliberate friendzoning. If Caleb just stops being weird, then everything’s fine! They can be friends! Maybe he can date Astrid again and be happy and stop being weird to her!

Moving on to Fjord, we get kind of a contrast, because Fjord’s the one person Jester is maybe flirting back with a little. Fjord hasn’t actually admitted to anyone else that he does have feelings for Jester--in fact, there was a whole conversation with Beau on Rumblecusp about how honestly, he’s barely sure of who he even is, let alone how he’s going to feel next week or what he wants in the long term. He does, however, keep doing things that read as tremendously flirty. The whole thing with the unicorn screamed ‘Travis Willingham is deeply in love with his wife’.

They danced, and it was cute! She kissed him on the cheek! And also, when they first started dancing (deliberately shoved together and out onto the floor by Caleb), the first thing Jester did was drop a stinkbomb on the dance floor. And also, it is occurring to me right now, when Jester does things like kiss Fjord on the cheek, he doesn’t flinch. He smiles at her, and it’s okay, and he doesn’t make it weird, and he also doesn’t push.

On the other hand, in the past we’ve seen Fjord get weird and awkward in possibly-flirty situations with Jester, and she calls him on it right out loud. Jester’s original crush on Fjord is full canon, although it’s not entirely confirmed what it’s turned into since. She might be open to advances, but she’s going to ask for clarification and she’s going to make him say it out loud. If he actively flirts, she is going to kiss him on the cheek and make him deal with it rather than pretending it never happened and letting him off the hook.

And: she’s not initiating any more, not really. Not the way she used to during the first couple of arcs of the campaign. If he actually wants her he’s going to have to say it out loud.

All in all, it makes me think about Jester as, perhaps, someone who doesn’t want to rock the boat. She’d rather avoid any complicated situations of unrequited feelings with people who may or may not be willing to admit those feelings to anyone at all. It is to her benefit if Caleb and Beau get over their crushes because then she doesn’t have to deal with them wanting things.

And right, it’s not that they’re asking for things! It’s not that they’ve ever asked for things, and maybe not that they ever even would. But Jester has some feelings about people wanting things from her, because Jester wants everybody she loves to be happy, and she’ll put on a happy face and cry in private about it, and so this is a really awkward position for her. She’ll never force a conversation about it, but she can spread the awkward and uncomfortable around until maybe the wanting goes away too (Caleb), or she can leap at an opportunity to redirect the attention and then hey, look, everyone is happy problem solved.

I’m really curious to see how things proceed with Fjord, especially with Avantika suddenly showing up now to throw god knows what kind of wrench in the works. Is he going to keep flirting? Is he going to stop again? How is Jester going to respond if he does?

But I do think that it’s interesting to think about Jester and her choices in this situation, and also how much of this is an actual choice and how much is just instinctual avoidance. She has lots of reasons to push Beau and Yasha together, she doesn’t have to think about why she’s so happy to see them paying attention to each other or why she’s so very not jealous of that attention. She loves pushing peoples’ buttons, she doesn’t have to think about why Caleb has developed the particular buttons he has.

I don’t know what the answer is! I don’t know if Laura Bailey entirely knows what the answer is, or if I’m on the wrong track completely. I am sure various shippers will have a counter-argument to these thoughts!

But until further canon confirmation or dismissal, these are the theories I’m going with: Jester trying to steer Beau and Caleb away without ever, ever talking about it, and accepting the Fjord situation for now because he’s not being weird and awkward about it so at least that’s okay.

#cr spoilers #critical role #are you kidding no I'm not putting this in ship tags what do you take me for #is this entirely coherent?#eh probably not #but I haven't posted morning-after-ep character meta in MONTHS #so it's nice to get back to

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princessamericachavez · 4 years ago

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Little Fjorester things from ep 115

I KNOW THEY WERE LITTLE BUT LET ME ENJOY THE CRUMBS WE GET BECAUSE THEY ARE STILL ADORABLE LIKE PLS:

Jester giving Fjord her sketchbook?

Like, that’s basically her diary and the way she worship(ed) the traveler and there’s probably so many personal things in there

AND YOU’RE TELLING ME IT’S IN HIS POSSESSION RIGHT NOW?

He said he shoved it into his pocket after Daggen’s awful sketch but like

will Travis remember he has it?? (probably not)

Did he see anything as he passed the pages to find a blank page? (yes pls lemme dream)

JUST LOOK AT THEM

It’s like she’s giving him a little piece of herself and he’s so happy to accept it, I’m-

“What if they turn into turtles or something?? Fjord, that would be your nightmare!”

LMFAO THE BANTER I CAN’T DJAFÑAJD

“Some creatures hunt for sport here.”

Jester: “The animals?”

Fjord (softly): “I don’t think he’s talking about animals.”

LOOK AT HIS FACE HE’S SO SOOOOOOFT

Jester: “Oh... the monsters. Right.”

“What if it starts like just a physical thing but then slowly over the week’s that you’re guiding them you start to realize, like, ‘oh my gos, I think I might t have feelings for them but I can’t let them know because there’s an unwritten code’ and it gets awkward and then the long glances”

[...] “And then you have to pretend, you have to pretend for the rest of your life that it didn’t mean anything!”

YEAH

YOU KNOW WHAT

YOU KNOW WHAT LAURA BAILEY

YOU DIDN’T HAVE TO COME FOR ME (and your hubby) LIKE THAT

okay okay okay moving on

listen

THE SCRY

like the way he starts all casual and curious fjord because that’s how he usually is and trying to be all coy about it but then Matt Mercer blesses us by specifying it’s only a couple feet away from Jester

And you can see the moment it CLICKS’s for Fjord that this orb is scrying on Jester

AND DAMN FJORD JUST FREEZES LIKE THIS FOR A SOLID FIVE SECONDS

AND JUST GIVES A LITTLE ‘HMM’ AND THE SMALLEST NOD

AS HE REALIZES

DLKFJAÑDKLFJA

FJORD GOING INTO PROTECTIVE MODE YESSSSSS

And That’s when he actually walks straight to the thing, still pretending not to see it

and he steps next to it and does this sharp breath as he turns to look at Jester

Right before he drops that bomb

“It seems like we’re not the only ones watching. If you try to hurt my friends I will hunt you down to the ends of the earth. Keep. Your. Distance.”

I’M SO SAD THAT LUCIEN PROBABLY DIDN’T HEAR THAT

LISTEN

MATT

PLS JUST BEND THE RULES FOR ME

GIVE IT TO ME PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE

still *breaths in and out* okay it’s fine because he still said that, still meant it, so it’s fineeee

AND THE WAY HE TELLS HER

Trying to soften the blow, clearly, because he doesn’t want to make her anxious

“But, Jester, it was located where you were. Perhaps it’s the Gentleman or perhaps it’s...”

“I don’t think he can do it.”

And then Veth suggests Lucien knows Jester now because of the scrying spell and he’s immediately like “Does Lucien know her now, though, because of the scrying spell?”

“Fjord, if that happens again, just wake me up. I can dispel it.”

IDK THEIR QUIET LOOKS

LOOK AT THEM

And then Fjord and Caduceus bring up the possibility that Lucien could properly see Jester and not just a ‘scrying ball’

And she’s clearly distressed by it

So Jester does what Jester does and jokes about how she might have looked like inside the ball

And Fjord plays along, sort of, saying her mouth was open when she slept which is definitely an attempt to cheer her up

“You were sleeping with your mouth open, if it’s any consolation.”

And it works because it’s funny and just LOOK AT THEM

HE’S SO PROUD THAT HE MADE HER SMILE AT LEAST A LITTLE

every time

im just

The way they always focus on each other during group chaos

like how she’s so offended that fjord suggests yasha use her sword to dispel the necromantic stone

“I can dispel it! I have dispel!”

“Oh, right!”

LMFAO LOOK AT THIS DUMMIES

(also some side delicious Beauyasha with Beau yelling “i am not having yasha walk up and hit it with her sword!)

okay and then, of course, Jester wants to pull a prank pointing people towards the Emerald

and first when Caleb tries to disuade her because “that’s murder” she snaps back “well they should be smarter than that” (lol meaning Caleb)

but then Fjord says “it’s a bit much” and says he would’ve gone for it if he’d seen her sign and her immediate response is so much softer like-

And then by the end, after they both try to convince her...

they share this super long glance and he quietly says “leave it?” and she finally gives in

BECAUSE SHE TRUSTS HIS JUDGEMENT THE MOST OK???

SHE DOES

AND HE’S USUALLY DOWN FOR SHENANIGANS EXCEPT IF SOMEONE COULD GET HURT

AND HE KNOWS SHE DOESN’T WANT PEOPLE TO GET HURT

BECAUSE, LIKE HE SAID IN RUMBLECUSP, HE KNOWS SHE CARES

OK OK OK OK

look listen this is ooc but also not so hear me out

so they went to break before the yeti attack right?

and jester and fjord were both inside of the net

and then Yasha helps Jester out of it

but Travis is still super stressed and looking at his spells

AND I’M PRETTY SURE HE WAS PLANING ON HOW TO GET THEM BOTH OUT WITH A SPELL OR SOMETHING

(they probably planned it on the break???)

because Laura turns to Travis and she’s like “did you hear that? I just got free of the net” and his whole body language relaxes like “oh, good... wait how”

anyway

YES HE WAS GOING TO GET HER OUT YOU CAN’T CHANGE MY MIND

and then and then and then

before they realized Fjord had advantage to get out of the net

they were planning for him to shoot eldritch blast

and then jester was going to hold the net up for him

LISTEN

i choose to imagine this conversation happened during battle ok?

you can’t stop me

and speaking about fjorester being protective of each other

Lucien messages Jester

and a) travis just drops the thing he’s looking at which is hilarious, b) fjord does not look happy when jester tells them, but not in an angry way but in a *hundred yards stare i’m gonna kill that fucker* kinda thing

Fjord, after noticing another scrying orb: Oh, yes... they seem to be locked on you again.

Jester: *fails to dispel it*

Jester: Is it gone?

Fjord, looking at it: Yes.

Fjord: You got it.

Jester: Really? Oh my gosh! I’m so good at this!

LOOK AT THAT SMILE OKAY HE IS SO IN LOVE I CAN’T

OKAY FIRST OF ALL

THIS IS ONLY THE SECOND LIE FJORD HAS EVER TOLD JESTER AND THAT FUCKS ME UP OKAY?

BUT ALSO

he’s just trying to ease her mind

she’s clearly upset what with lucien being able to see her, scrying on her and now messaging her... she’s annoyed and pissed and —scared—

so Fjord, going back to his protective mode, lies to ease her mind

if there’s nothing they can do about the scrying right now, at least he can make her feel like she got back at the fucker who dispelled her before

okay that’s all

tune in next week (maybe) for more yelling

who’s excited for tonight?

#fjorester #fjord stone #jester lavorre #critical role #sofia's nonsense #man i haven't done one of this in a while but here you goooooo

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andrewmoocow · 4 years ago

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Steven Universe Alternate Future chapter 9: Little Graduation (originally posted on March 15, 2021)

AN: It's good to be back in business! Steven Universe: Alternate Future has returned at last, and with it, the plot begins to thicken. If I were to compare all four parts to RWBY, the previous one is Volume 1 (goofy fun times with some fighting), this one will be Volume 2 (a fine mix of both), Part 3 is Volume 3 (everything goes to hell), and finally Part 4 is a mix of Volumes 4 & 5 (dealing with the aftermath of Part 3, but things will get much better at the end.) Anyways, can Steven keep a lid on his negative emotions? How long before he learns what Black Rutile has planned for him? And will he be both physical and mentally strong enough to fight one last evil Gem? Tune in and find out!

Synopsis: As Steven prepares a party for Little Homeschool's first graduating class, his fears of growing apart from his friends slowly become reality.

Cast:

Zach Callison as Steven

Matthew Moy as Lars

Kate Micucci as Sadie

Indya Moore as Shep

Brian Posehn as Sour Cream

Lamar Abrams as Buck

Reagan Gomez Preston as Jenny

Erica Luttrell as Padparadscha Sapphire

Kathleen Fisher as Fluorite

Enuka Okuma as Rhodonite

Ashly Burch as Rutile Twins

Deedee Magno Hall as Morganite's Pearl

Charlyne Yi as Morganite's Ruby

Laura Bailey as Titanite

Michaela Dietz as Blue Lace Agate

Jinkx Monsoon as Emerald

"Teens by day, hey! We're all right." Steven began singing along to Sade Killer and the Suspects' hit song as he drove away from home one relaxing day in Beach City. "Teens by day, but every night we're Sadie Killer and the Suspects! Whoa, Sadie Killer and the Suspects!"

Steven continued singing as he drove through Beach City until he made a stop at Lars's interstellar pastry shop Spacetries. Today was a special day, and Lars was going to be an essential part of it.

"Hey, Blue Lace." Steven greeted the Agate as he entered the shop.

"Hey, Steven." Blue Lace replied with a wave. "If you're looking for Lars, he's right over there." She added before getting back to rolling some dough.

"Hey Steven, here to pick up the cake?" Lars asked while looking over the order Steven placed.

"Yeah," Steven answered. "but I also wanted to check up on you. How are things?"

"Oh, y'know, same old same old." The pink man replied just as the door opened behind the pair. "Wait, is that-"

"Hey Steven, hi Lars!" Sadie Miller cheerfully greeted the duo. When Steven and Lars turned around, they saw that Sadie had changed a lot since they last saw her. Sadie's hair was now fully blonde again and in a ponytail. She wore a pink headband, had a white shirt with a blue one tied around her waist, and black pants. "Long time no see, you two."

"Sadie!" Steven cheered at the sight of his old friend. "Oh my gosh, I can't remember the last time we were together in a pastry establishment!"

"Yo Sadie, I got your moon cakes." Lars said, presenting a box with a moon symbol on the sides to his former co-worker and handing it to her.

"Thanks, Lars." Sadie responded gratefully as she took the box of moon cakes.

"So, how are things going with you and Shep?" Lars followed up.

"What?" Steven asked, completely confused about who the pair were talking about. "Who's Shep?"

"Shep's my new partner." Sadie said to Steven. "They're real cool & chill, and I can't believe we've been dating for two months now!"

"That's cool, I guess." Lars said awkwardly. "Tell them I said hi for me."

"Will do, Lars." Sadie replied as she left the store. "See you again someday."

"Shep, someday?" Steven continued asking, still unaware of what was going on. "Is there something I'm missing?"

"As Sadie said, Shep's her new partner." Lars reiterated for his ex-girlfriend. "They met while the Suspects were touring, and love was just in the air for them from there. I met them myself, and I find it nice Sadie fell for someone who isn't a real piece of work like I was back in the day."

"Yeah, you were kind of a jerk back then." Steven chuckled nostalgically. "Which reminds me, why did Sadie say "see you again someday"?"

"Oh, that." Lars said, nervously rubbing his neck. "Really wish I told you earlier, but I'm gonna be going back to space once the Off-Colors graduate tonight."

"Wait, you're leaving Earth so soon?!" Steven gasped at the shocking news. "But what about the shop?!"

"Don't worry, Steven, I'll cover for him!" Blue Lace called from her counter.

"Thanks, Blue Lace! I always could count on you." Lars said to his employee before returning to Steven. "I'm just ready to move on, cause that's just life. You get what I'm saying, right? I mean, now that Little Homeschool is all finished, what do you wanna do now?"

"I, uh…" Steven began stumbling over his words at the thought of thinking about what to do next now that he's saved the universe from the Diamonds' tyranny and resolving most of his issues with his family.

"Hey, graduation cake's ready!" Lars declared, derailing Steven's train of thought. "See you tonight, Steven, okay?"

"Okay." Steven replied.

"When me and my partners first discovered fusion, it was the most wonderful experience any of us had shared, and couldn't bear to be torn apart from then on." One of Fluorite's components, a large green Gem named Titanite, said to an audience of fellow Gems and humans later that night at the big graduation ceremony. Behind her stood her lovers, Lavender Jade, Iolite, Rubellite, Indicolite & Verdelite, along with the Ruby & Pearl that make up Rhodonite, the Rutile twins, and Padparadscha Sapphire. "Even when we declared pariahs for our love, we refused to let it get us down. Now, centuries later, we're finally free to express ourselves without fear of persecution, and we couldn't be happier. Thank you, Steven, for everything."

The audience began cheering as Titanite bowed and returned to her partners to give them all a big hug, which resulted in them all forming Fluorite once again. "Oh my." She said slowly. "It really has been so long since we've been apart."

As Fluorite took her place alongside the other Off-Colors, Ruby and Pearl were next. "As Titanite said, fusion was the most wonderful time we spent together." The Pearl stated. "In fact, Fluorite was the first cross-Gem fusion just like us that we encountered, and our little Off-Color family grew from there."

"The Morganite we formerly served refused to let us fuse because she feared it would endanger her status until she finally had us replaced." The Ruby added. "When we got the news, we fled as soon as it was broken to us while Shattering Robonoids chased us down. But thankfully, we were able to survive, and now, here we are."

The audience cheered again as the pair of Gems kissed on stage, once again merging into Rhodonite before she took her place alongside the Off-Colors. Next to make a speech were the Rutile twins.

"My sister here and I popped out as one Gem due to some incident with the Injectors that created us." The left Rutile explained. "We weren't even supposed to live, but we did anyways because all the other Rutiles ran from us."

"We were nearly shattered right then and there, but Fluorite found a way to help us escape, and there we stayed." The right Rutile added. "At least, until Steven and Lars came into our lives, on the run as well. We helped them out, and they helped us in return. And we couldn't be more grateful."

As the Rutiles left the mic, Padparadscha Sapphire became the last Off-Color to give a speech. However, hers was a lot shorter. "I'm going to give a grand speech at the graduation ceremony tonight!" she declared brightly. "Oh, what fun!"

The crowd began laughing before Steven took the mic for himself and led Padparadscha away. "Thank you, Paddy, that was very moving." He joked, prompting more laughter. "We're all so proud to see our graduates grow and stay together as everyone goes their separate ways while moving onto bigger and better things. Well, besides me, of course. I'll be staying right here in Beach City, teaching the next generation of Little Homeschool graduates. Okay, now move those tassels!"

The Off-Colors each moved the tassels on their caps.

"Now, let's give a hearty con-grad-ulations to our first alumnae of Little Homeschool!" Steven exclaimed, prompting everyone to cheer.

Soon after, the Off-Colors left the stage while a party celebrating the ceremony commenced. Steven wandered around the beach, looking around at Gems and humans interacting before seeing Sadie interacting with someone he never saw before. They were dark-skinned and wearing a backwards cap, a crop top, nose ring, purple joggers, blue and white high-tops, four colorful bracelets, and a dark green backpack.

"Oh, hey Steven, I never got the chance to introduce you to my new partner." Sadie called for Steven. "I'd like you to meet Shep."

"It's nice to meet you, Steven." Shep greeted Steven.

"So, is it true that you and Sadie have been dating for almost two months?" Steven asked Shep.

"Yeah, that's true." Shep replied. "We met during one of Sadie's concerts a while back, and after exchanging numbers, things just fell into place."

"You know, some people say you don't really get to know them until you get stranded on an island with them." Steven chuckled, though Shep didn't get his joke.

"Uh, do people really say that?" Shep wondered. "Whatever. Sadie and I are going to get cake; then we'll perform at 7."

"That's right." Sadie laughed before the two of them left for some graduation cake. "See you then Steven."

"Wait a sec; I thought you were performing with the Suspects?" Steven halted Sadie for a bit.

"Actually, Shep and I are planning to do a song together." The ex-donut girl said, gesturing to her non-binary partner.

"Uh, cool. Can't wait to get it." Steven replied nervously.

"Cool." Shep smiled as they left with Sadie. "Catch you later."

Steven noticed Lars was also going to get some cake and tried to block his path. "I wouldn't go over there if I were you."

"Is something the matter Steven?" Lars asked his younger friend. "I mean, the cake was just what you ordered."

"No, it's about Sadie and Shep." Steven revealed while gazing at the couple.

"Oh, nice." Lars grinned. "I'll stop by and say hey."

"But, aren't you okay?!" Steven tried to call for the pink man.

"Aren't you?" Lars repeated Steven's question, causing the half-Gem boy to put on a fake grin.

"Why wouldn't I be?" Steven replied before he spotted Jenny Pizza sitting on the stage, having herself a drink. "'sup, Jenny?"

"Hey Steven!" the Pizza girl greeted Steven. "Looks like everyone's enjoying the graduation so far."

"Yep, everyone but me." Steven said sorrowfully. "I guess it looks like everyone's got something new going on."

"Yeah, it's not a bad thing, though," Jenny replied before she began pointing at both of her fellow Cool Kids. "Sour Cream has regular gigs as a DJ in Empire City." She explained while Sour Cream laid on Fluorite's massive head, and Buck conversed with Rhodonite at the refreshments. "And Buck's got into medical school, so he's gonna be saving lives in like, 20 years. Meanwhile, I've been going all out on my new phone jackets."

"What's that?" Steven asked before Jenny pulled out her phone, which was wearing a miniature coat to demonstrate.

"It's my new online business," Jenny explained. "We, and I'm using the royal we here, make the finest jackets suited for your mobile device."

"Aw, it's got little pockets!" Steven cooed in amazement at the jacket's features before he made another discovery. "And it's got its own little phone too! How are you going to find time to make and sell these?"

"Well, I'm gonna have a lot of time now that the Suspects are breaking up." Jenny casually revealed to Steven's alarm.

"Seriously, what?!" Steven yelled in shock.

"I suppose Sadie didn't tell you." Jenny guessed, just as Sadie and Shep returned from eating cake.

"Hey Steven, you ready for us?" Sadie asked.

"Oh, yeah, sure!" Steven suddenly remembered and walked over to the microphone. "So, is everyone having a good time tonight?" he asked the audience, and they cheered in response. "Who here's a Sadie Killer and the Suspects fan?! Cause tonight's performance only has one member."

"Oh boy." Lars muttered.

"So, please welcome to the stage," Steven continued, but then stopped to ask the two musicians. "Uh, what's your band called again?"

"We haven't thought of a name yet." Sadie admitted.

"Uh-huh, well, could've asked me." Steven giggled nervously before he began to walk offstage. "I'm really good at naming bands."

As Steven left, Sadie turned the microphone to her. "This is a little something Shep and I have been working on lately." She announced. "We hope you all like it."

"We will accept any criticism afterward." Shep stated when Sadie pointed the microphone to them before playing their recorder, cuing Sadie to sing.

"When I was younger and I hated fun," Sadie sang. "I was always looking back on what I should've done. I used to live my life in fear, of all the bad performances that led me here. But, I'm looking forward, I'm looking forward. I'm looking forward now."

While the song continued, Lars turned away from his ex on stage and proceeded to walk away.

"Lars?" Steven said to the donut boy turned space hero.

"Oh, hey Steven." Lars calmly greeted his friend, who began to run after him.

"Lars, wait up!" Steven called. "Hey Lars, where are you going?"

"I'm just gonna bounce, only wanted to spend time with the old gang before the Off-Colors and I go off-world," Lars answered. "Big parties really ain't my thing."

"But, you're leaving Earth tomorrow!" Steven cried as his body began taking on a faded pink hue. "When can I ever see you again?"

"You can see me whenever." Lars tried to assure Steven. "I've got the same powers as that lion of yours, so you can just pop out of my hair whenever you want."

"W-w-w-wait, please don't go!" Steven begged the space captain.

"It's been real Steven." Lars said farewell, or so he thought.

"Lars," Steven muttered before he fully turned pink. "STOP!"

Suddenly, Lars found himself bumping into a pink wall that slowly grew into a massive dome that trapped everyone at the ceremony.

"Steven, what's happening?!" Lars yelled as he pounded on the wall of the dome.

"I have no idea either!" Steven exclaimed in response.

"Really, you got no idea where this dome came from?!" Sour Cream yelled.

"Let's hope it doesn't end up like in that book!" Buck replied.

"I think this dome was created by someone having some powerful emotions, and I think we all know who it is." Steven declared before pointing to who he thought it was. "Lars!"

"Wait, what?!" everyone else gasped in shock.

"I don't think that's right!" Lars said defensively.

"No, I'm sure I'm right!" Steven lied to get out of opening up about his own feelings. "We won't get out of here until you work things out with Sadie! I'm pretty sure you guys haven't even talked since you got back, Lars!"

"We actually did, a few times." Sadie revealed solemnly. "Look, Steven, we did try to reconnect, but things just didn't work out between us. Plus, there's also the fact that despite how much we changed, we just weren't right for each other."

"Sadie knows I miss her, and I'm just too happy that she found someone to love herself." Lars added, prompting a touched reaction from Shep.

"And I know Lars is happier being with the Off-Colors in space." Sadie said.

"But when did this happen?!" Steven cried in disbelief. "I wasn't there for any of that!"

"That's because it was private!" Sadie answered.

"Yeah, I mean, you can't just stick yourself into other people's lives like the universe revolves around you and things only happen with you around." Lars pointed out. "Trust me; I know what that's like. Mostly the universe revolving around you part."

The crowd inside the dome was silent for a tiny bit, except for Jenny letting out a cough.

"But, I thought you were leaving because you were jealous of Shep." Steven broke the silence.

"I'm leaving because traveling through space is tons of fun." Lars declared. "Adventure is out there, as they say, and there's still tons of adventures for me and the Off-Colors to go on. Heck, we can even teach other planets what you taught us!"

"Okay, so there's nothing to work out then." Steven realized, but then he noticed something. "Hey, is it getting claustrophobic in here, or is it just me?"

The dome began to shrink more and more, despite everyone's best efforts to push it back.

"Steven, you want to get rid of this dome already?!" Rhodonite panicked while helping the Cool Kids try to keep the dome from shrinking.

"I'm trying, okay?!" Steven yelled anxiously. "Just gotta concentrate real hard!"

"Hey, Steven?" Shep stepped forward to comfort Steven.

"Not now, Shep, still concentrating!" Steven tried to ignore Shep.

"Please, listen to me." Shep urged the boy.

"Look, if I don't get rid of this dome quick, all my friends will die!" Steven screamed, now on the verge of tears.

"Wouldn't be the first time." Lars quipped in the possible face of death.

"Okay, but your magic's connected to your feelings, correct?" Shep theorized as they looked around them. "This is just a hunch, but it seems you made this dome because you're sad your friends are leaving, and want them to stay with you."

"I don't see what you're talking about." Steven replied.

"No, listen, you'd be surprised at how observant I can be." Shep assured Steven. "I think maybe you're figuring yourself out, and you want some friends to help you."

"Okay, you're right!" Steven confessed. "I've always been trying to help my friends, but now it seems like they don't need me anymore! I don't know who I am without them!"

"Aw, Steven, you're great. But you still need to let us go and live our own lives." Sadie convinced him while the dome began to squeeze them all together.

"I know, but I don't want to hold any of you back." Steven let out his current feelings as he felt himself get crushed between the dome and Fluorite's body. "I just can't help it if my big ol' heart still loves you all."

"Awww, Steven!" Jenny squealed in delight.

"We'll all still be friends." Sadie assured her little friend.

"Even if some of us are lightyears away." Lars added hopefully.

"You guys." Steven giggled before he returned to his normal color, and the dome finally disappeared.

"Hm, that wasn't the worst party we've been to." Jenny stated before she began to leave.

"Yeah, see ya Steven." Sour Cream added, beginning to walk away as well.

"At least there was no toxic air involved." Buck concurred.

"It was nice seeing you again." Sadie said, hugging Steven.

"Yeah, it was nice seeing all of you again too," Steven replied, now happier than he was earlier. "You two make a good couple."

"Hey, thanks." Shep replied gratefully. "You want a CD of our song?"

"How about a tape?" Steven suggested to them.

"Got your back." Shep said, handing Steven a tape of the song they just played. "Okay, take it easy."

As the couple left, Steven was now left alone with Lars. "Uh, Lars?"

"Gotta make this quick, Steven." Lars answered. "Me and the Off-Colors gotta," He stuck his tongue out and made a raspberry sound.

"First off, I'm sorry for what happened," Steven said meekly. "And second, do you think I can be a bit too controlling?"

"This coming from the guy who took over my body because you wanted me to be a nicer person." Lars chuckled. "But it's still cute you didn't want me to leave."

"I don't want you to leave!" Steven exclaimed.

"Hey, buck up Steven." Lars comforted the half-Gem. "As I said earlier, you can visit me anytime."

"It's just, for a second, we were all together on Earth again." Steven sighed heavily. "Maybe I just don't like graduations. Maybe I should leave Little Homeschool."

"Hey, come here." Lars then brought Steven in for a hug while the Off-Colors stood by watching. "Are you going to let go anytime soon?"

"Just a couple more minutes." Steven replied.

The next day, the Crystal Gems had begun welcoming new students to Little Homeschool. But Steven, having now quit teaching at the school, was still a little gloomy from last night.

While Sadie and Shep's song played in Steven's car, he drove out into the woods and then laid down on the roof, gazing up at the night sky. Just what was next for him?

"Lars of the Stars is back in business, baby!" Lars cheered as he once again made himself comfortable in the captain's seat of the Sun Incinerator. "So, what should we do now gang? Something good? Something bad? A bit of both?"

"You lead the way, captain." Rhodonite turned back to her human captain with a smile.

"Y'know what, let's just fly around and see what happens!" Lars declared after giving it some thought and ordered the Incinerator to blast off into the starry yonder.

Close by, another spaceship loomed behind the Sun Incinerator, and its captain had the Off-Colors by the tail.

"Finally." Emerald declared to herself as she spied on her prized ship flying around. "After so much waiting, I have you in my sights."

Emerald then pulled up a holographic screen that presented her with Black Rutile, and she eagerly awaited further commands from her cape-wearing master.

So opens the curtain on Part 2. Will we see Lars and the Off-Colors again, and will Emerald finally get her precious Sun Incinerator back? But enough about them for now, wait until later this part while we start dealing with more Earth-based matters, like plants for example! See you then!

#steven universe #steven universe future #fanfiction #steven universe alternate future #steven quartz universe #lars barriga #sadie miller #shep #fluorite #rhodonite #rutile twins #padparadscha sapphire

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just-dreaming-marvel · 5 years ago

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ONE HUNDRED THIRTY SEVEN - HAPPILY EVER AFTER (1)

LEGACY: A Tony Stark Daughter Story

FULL STORY MASTERLIST

ENDING ONE MASTERLIST

< previous

Word Count: 2,730ish

Summary: A happily ever after just might be in the cards for the Team after all.

~~~

And oh was Peggy right. Luckily, in the Afterlife, aging isn’t a thing.

It was about thirty years before I noticed a light turn on in the house next door. I was walking along the beach, thinking about my family and what they might be doing, when I noticed a light turn on. Curious, I slowly made my way over to the house. Climbing onto the back porch, I could hear voices talking inside.

“It’s been so long,” Maria’s voice rang out in a joyful cry.

“I know,” a male voice said.

The voice caused me to freeze. I hadn’t heard that voice in a long time. Far too long. Tears beginning streaming down my face as I tried to will myself to move but couldn’t. The world around me became muted, I couldn’t focus on anything. That lead to me not being able to hear the door open or my name being called repeatedly. Everything finally came into focus when a hand rested on my cheek and a met warm brown eyes.

“Bailey, sweetheart,” Tony called. “Can you hear me?”

“Dad?” I whimpered.

“It’s me, sweetheart.” Tears formed in his eyes as he smiled. “It’s me.”

“Dad.” My knees gave way but Tony quickly caught me and gently guided us to the ground. He pulled me into his chest, holding me tightly. “You’re here.”

“I’m here, honey. I’m right here.”

“I’ve missed you so much. It’s been too long.”

“Way too long.” He held a kiss to my forehead. “And I’ve missed you more.”

After calming me down, Tony then told me about the last thirty years that I had missed out on. Morgan grew into a wonderful woman. She married and had three children, naming one of them after me. The Avengers were still going, now with Peter in charge. The original Avengers had all retired and, if they had children, their children were running the program.

“That’s all so amazing,” I stated once Tony was finished. It hadn’t gone unnoticed by me that he hadn’t mentioned Steve. “I— I missed so much.”

Tony’s hand rested against my cheek. “I wish you had been there, B, for everything. I really do. We all were constantly missing you. Especially your Old Man and, well, your other Old Man.”

I chuckled. “How’s Steve?”

“Him and Morgan are attached at the hip. Have been ever since you died. Morgan’s husband even felt the need to ask him for her hand after asking me.” I laughed. “We were both terrifying the first time he came to pick her up. We thought he was going to shit his pants and never come back. She even had us both walk her down the aisle. Mo’s kids call him Uncle Steve. They all adore each other. I built him a house near by, but he basically lives with us.”

“Did— Did he ever—“

“He never married.” Tony looked me right in the eyes. “Told everyone he was waiting for the right partner… He told Morgan and her kids stories about you, all the time. Steve never stopped loving you.”

“And I’ve never stopped loving him.”

Pepper joined us a little more than three years later. After that, they seemed to come pretty fast. Rhodey was next. Then Happy and Aunt May. Clint and his wife, Laura, were the next to join us. Natasha came after Sam. Bucky and Steve took longer, due to the serums. Bucky showed up first, with no guesses to when Steve was going to show. He told us it could be days or it could be years. It turned out to be a few months after.

I was out on the beach, a flowy yellow dress on, blowing in the wind with my feet in the water.

The sun was beginning to set. Pepper found Steve first, calling everyone to gather at my house before notifying me. Steve could see me by the water, staring out at it. He wanted to rush to me, grab me and never let me go again. But at the same time, he was scared. Scared that after all these years, my feelings towards him might have changed. Everyone watched Steve, wanting to see our reunion, and were confused as to why he was hesitating. Well, everyone was confused except Bucky and Tony. The two glanced at each other, Bucky urging Tony to go up and talk to the man. Tony walked up, setting a hand on Steve’s shoulder.

“You’re luckily she doesn’t have her powers anymore,” Tony teased, “or else she’d be able to sense you from here.”

“What if she doesn’t feel the same anymore?” Steve quietly asked. “What if I waited all that time for nothing?”

“You are out of your mind, Cap. You’re forgetting, she’s waited too. She’s waited just as long as you have and with less of the family with her. She loves you. And as her father, I wouldn’t say that unless I knew it was true. I also wouldn’t give you this.” Tony dug into his pocket and pulled out a ring.

“It’s gorgeous, Tony,” Steve said as he carefully took the ring and inspected it.

“I made it for you to give to her.”

“Are you—“ Steve quickly made eye contact with Tony. “Are you giving me your blessing?”

“Yes. Now,” Tony pushed Steve out the door, “go down there and ask her before I change my mind.”

“Tony,” Steve called before the man could close the door. Tony looked at Steve. “Thank you.”

Tony simply nodded as he shut the door. Steve turned around and looked at me. He had waited for this moment for so long, he realized that he was being stupid for waiting any longer. Steve took a deep breath and began making his way towards me. I could hear footsteps behind me but I didn’t bother turning around, thinking it was Tony.

“I think the sunset’s more beautiful today than it’s ever been since I’ve been here,” I said. “It’s just… I can’t even find the words to explain it.”

“I feel the same way,” Steve’s voice came from behind. I quietly gasped, not daring to turn around. “Except about you.” Steve walked around me, standing in the water in front of me. “I don’t think that you’ve ever looked more beautiful.”

“Steve,” I breathed. I slowly set a hand on his cheek, checking to see if he was my imagination playing tricks on me. “Steve.”

Steve chuckled at my reaction, gripping onto my hand that was resting on his cheek. “Hey, B.”

“You’re here.” I jumped onto him, wrapping my arms around his neck and my legs around his waist.

He quickly held onto me, trying to keep balance so that we wouldn’t fall back into the water and buried his head into my neck. “I’m here. You’re here… We’re together… Finally... it’s been too long...”

“I missed you so much.”

“I’ve missed you too, sweetheart.”

We pulled back enough to connect our lips in a long awaited kiss. It had been far too long in both of our opinions, but it was worth the wait. When we finally broke apart, I unwrapped my legs and Steve helped me get steady on the ground.

“I love you so much, Steve,” I whispered, tears of happiness forming in my eyes. “So, so much.”

“Well Bailey,” Steve pulled out the ring Tony had gifted him and got down on one knee, in the water. “I love you 3000 and I’ve waited far too long to began our life together. So, I dare ask you again, will you marry me?”

“Yes,” I nodded hurriedly, “A thousand times yes.”

I held my hand out and allowed Steve to slip the ring onto my finger. Before he could stand up, I jumped onto him, throwing us into the water. We laughed as we kissed. We heard cheering coming from the house. Looking over, I noticed that everyone was watching out on the porch and they seemed to be heading our way. I giggled as Steve pushed us up to kneel in the water. Once everyone reached us, we got up to receive the congratulations.

After we celebrated, with everyone and just Steve and I, we decided to get married as soon as possible. Pepper, Maria, Natasha, and Peggy, had the wedding planned and set within a week of Steve arriving (with Steve, Tony, and I’s input of course). Steve got to introduce me to his parents, and they were also involved with the planning. The night before the big day, the women slept over at my place while the men slept over at Tony and Pepper’s. The ceremony was set up on the beach outside my back door. The women were pampering me, doing my nails, hair, and make up. The nerves were beginning to take over my excitement and, unknowingly to me, I began to tremble. Pepper was the first one to take notice.

“B,” she quickly turned me to face her, “look at me.” I quickly met her eyes. “It’s okay. You’re just getting married today.”

“Yeah, Bailey,” Nat chuckled. “You’re just getting married.”

Pepper took my shaking hands and held them in hers on her lap. “Tell me what’s going through your head.”

“I just… is this really happening? Am I really getting married? And to Steve?”

“You are, B.”

“Did he… he really waited for me? Lived out his life alone until he could be with me?”

“He really did,” Peggy said. “He loves you a great deal.”

“And I him.” I closed my eyes and took a shaking breath. “Okay.” I opened my eyes back up and looked at everyone in the room. “Let’s get me ready. I promised Steve I wouldn’t be late.”

In the next house over, Tony and Bucky were trying their best to get Steve to calm down.

“What if she has second thoughts?” Steve questioned, rambling as he spiraled. “What if she regrets waiting for me? I don’t think I can take that.”

“Steve,” Bucky slapped his friend in the back, “she waited for you, just like you did for her. That girl is head over heals for you.”

“But what if she realizes that—“

“Stop right there, Rogers,” Tony interrupted. “Barnes is right. And I wouldn’t tell you that unless I knew it was true. I also wouldn’t be willing to walk her down the aisle unless I knew that she loved you and that you loved her.” Tony walked up and set his hands on Steve’s arms. “Now, you need to calm down, so that when I get her, I can promise her that you’re at the end of the aisle.”

After I was all dolled up and the dress was on, the women left me alone to my thoughts. I was still a bit nervous as I stood there looking at myself in the mirror, but I knew it wouldn’t last long and the excitement was quickly replacing my nerves. I jumped slightly as a knock sounded at the door. I looked in the mirror to see Tony poke his head through, eyes shut.

“Is the bride ready for her father to see her now?” He teased. “I don’t want to jinks anything.”

“Of course,” I giggled as I turned around.

He entered the room quickly, shutting the door with his back before opening his eyes. “Bailey,” he gasped, “you’re— you’re gorgeous.”

Tony hurried across the room and grabbed my hands. “You… I’m so proud of you. Though Rogers and I have our differences, I know he’s the right man for you. He loves you so much… But of course, not as much as I do.” His eyes slowly filled with tears as he spoke. He dropped one of my hands, resting his free hand on my cheek. “I love you so much.”

“I love you too Daddy.”

“Come here.” Tony quickly pulled me into him, holding me tight. He held a kiss to my temple. “I couldn’t have picked anyone better,” he whispered. “You’ve got that man whipped.”

I heard him sniffling. “Are you crying?” I tried to pull back to look at his face, but he just held me tighter. “It’s okay.” I rubbed his back, trying to comfort him. “I’ll just be living next door, like I have since you got here… I’m not actually going anywhere.” We stayed like that until we heard the music start. Tony gave me one last kiss on the cheek. Tears rimmed his eyes as we studied each others faces.

“Come on,” Tony moved so that he was at my side and slid one of his arms through mine. “We best be going. Here,” he grabbed my bouquet, “let’s go before Steve thinks that I drove you away in a getaway car.”

Tony guided me out of the room and out onto the porch. I could see our friends, our family seated on either side of the aisle. Happy was under the arch, as he was officiating the ceremony, and so was Steve. I wanted Steve stand up straighter and smile wider as Tony and I stepped into his view. Tony patted my arm as we made our way down the stairs and towards everyone. As we got closer to Steve, I noticed a tear escape his eyes. I smiled at him, trying to stop myself from crying. Tony and Steve shook hands before Tony gave me a kiss on the cheek and handed my hand over to Steve.

“You look beautiful,” Steve whispered as he gently took my hand.

The ceremony was simple, and personal. Steve and I wrote our own vows. When we shared our first kiss as husband and wife, everyone jumped up and cheered. Steve quickly picked me up and spun me around as we kissed. We broke apart, smiling the biggest smiles we could at each other. We then ran down the aisle and onto the porch, laughing the whole way. When we stopped, Steve quickly pulled me in for another kiss.

“Wow,” I said quietly as we parted.

Steve chuckled. “So Mrs. Rogers, what should we do first?”

“I think that we should move up the reception so that we can get the honeymoon started, Mr. Rogers.”

“I couldn’t agree more,” Steve smiled as he went in for another kiss.

Everyone was easily convinced to move up the reception except Tony, though Pepper quickly fixed that. As soon as the dance floor and the food was out, the party started. There were toasts not long after the party started. Bucky and Tony tried not to cry through their toasts. Afterwards, Steve and I had our first dance. As “It’s Been a Long, Long Time” played, Steve held me as close as he could, quietly whispering the song for just us two to hear.

“Never thought that you would be, standing here so closer to me. There’s so much I feel that I should say. But words can wait, until some other day... Kiss me once, then kiss me twice. Then kiss me once again. It’s been a long, long time.”

“Haven’t felt like this, my dear,” I cut him off, “since can’t remember when. It’s been a long, long time.” Steve and I looked lovingly at each other.

“You’ll never know how many dreams I’ve dreamed about you.”

“Or just how empty they all seemed without you.”

“So kiss me once.”

“Then kiss me twice.”

“Then kiss me once again.”

“It’s been a long, long time,” we sang quietly together.

Soon, Steve and I’s song ended and Tony was quickly asking Steve he he could cut it. Tony held me close as well. I could tell his was trying to put on a brave face, but fathers just tend to have a hard time at their daughters weddings.

“You don’t have to be strong for me, dad,” I smiled up at him. “You’ll allowed to cry.”

“I cried at Morgan’s wedding too… Especially as I watched her dance with Steve… It made me long for you to be there. And it made me realize that Steve is truly a great man, and that he really loves you… You picked good sweetie. No matter who much crap I gave you for years about him. You did good.”

“Well, I had help.” I reached up at kissed his cheek. “Thank you, Dad, for saving me. For raising me with love, no matter how many fights we had or how much crap happened to us. I wouldn’t be who I am without you.”

A tear ran down Tony’s cheek as he placed a kiss to my forehead. When the song ended, the music changed to something you could really dance to. As we celebrated, I studied everyone. We all were so happy, so excited. The weight of the world... the universe... was on no one’s shoulders. We were all free. We were all finally at rest.

THE END

AFTER HAPPILY EVER AFTER

Thanks so much for reading! I hope you continue reading through endings 2 and 3 (which can be found on the main story masterlist, as they come out). Ending 2 will begin coming out tomorrow! Please feel free to ask any questions you have about the endings. Thanks again for all the support! It means the world!

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tigerkirby215 · 4 years ago

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5e Illaoi, the Kraken Priestess build (League of Legends)

(Artwork by Riot Games)

I’ll take “Champions Everyone Hates” for $300, Larry!

Jokes aside Illaoi was a beyond obvious build with all the Unearthed Arcana subclasses being shown off. With Tasha’s Cauldron on the horizon and recent news that Illaoi is actually getting another skin it only makes sense to make a build for her.

But this is also an opportunity to make something interesting. In particular I see a lot of people online saying that the only viable melee Warlock is Hexblade, and while the Hexblade subclass certainly makes creating a melee Warlock easier it isn’t the only path you can choose. So to prove that you can play other Warlocks with a big ball to slam people with here’s a more melee focused Warlock build!

GOALS

Sheeyutu Nagakabouros - So Illaoi needs tentacles. What? Lurker in the Deep Warlock? I have no idea what you’re talking about.

Broken bones teach better lessons - Illaoi is a buff lady and I want her to crush my head between her thighs... What? Uhhh STRENGTH BUILD TIME!

Many gods ask for worship; they are weak gods - Probably the only hard part about this build is going to be ripping people’s souls out of their body... Good thing I’m honestly probably not going to do that and simply reflavor some stuff.

RACE

League of Legends has its gods and monsters, but the majority of the characters are human. Variant Humans get to start with a little bit more than the average human, but let’s get the normal things out of the way first: increase your Strength and Charisma by 1 to break bones more easily and to find more people who want you to break their bones. You also get a proficiency in a skill of your choice such as Athletics to lug a giant Kraken god head statue around all day, and a language of your choice like Deep Speech to speak to your god through your statue.

But most importantly you get a free Feat, and unfortunately this is a case of me being forced to stick feats into this build for the sake of aesthetic. Illaoi doesn’t wear armor in-game but I could make the argument that her massive arm pauldrons and general outfit could be seen as Medium armor. So even though you could get Heavy Armor “proficiency” thanks to the Eldritch Armor Invocation from the Class Feature Variants UA I’m instead going to suggest taking the Moderately Armored Feat for Medium Armor proficiency and +1 to your Strength score. Feel free to take something like Great Weapon Master instead if you’re okay with actually wearing Heavy Armor at the cost of an invocation.

ABILITY SCORES

15; STRENGTH - Eat your heart out The Last of Us 2 haters. (BTW screw everyone who’s been harassing Laura Bailey on Twitter. I know this is old news but still.)

14; DEXTERITY - Something something Medium Armor, even if Heavy Armor is an option.

13; CHARISMA - Ultimately this is a requirement for the class we’ll have to be playing, but I’m sure there’s a reason this tentacle-lover keeps showing up to ruin my soloqueue games.

12; CONSTITUTION - Illaoi is a tank in-game and while I’d love this to be higher unfortunately we need other things more.

10; WISDOM - Illaoi has knowledge of the old gods which I’d personally consider to be more Wisdom based than Intelligence.

8; INTELLIGENCE - Signing yourself off to be the priestess of some deep sea Cthulhu monster isn’t something you do when you have a high GPA.

BACKGROUND

Fun fact: you can be a priest and not be a Cleric! The Acolyte background lets you grant your service to a god, even if that god isn’t commonly accepted. You gain some Religion proficiency as well as general Insight, as well as two languages of your choice like Abyssal and Primordial to speak to all the ancient beings of Bilgewater.

Your feature Shelter of the Faithful will be a... little odd for your DM to implement. There are few temples to Nagakabouros, but if you can find followers of the Bearded Lady they will provide shelter for you and your allies, and also support you (and you alone) as their Priestess. But regardless you will still be able to find your people in your hometown, and will be able to perform sermons for your god. Even if those sermons involve cracking skulls.

(Artwork by Riot Games)

THE BUILD

LEVEL 1 - WARLOCK 1

Did you enjoy seeing the word “Fighter” a lot in my Garen build? Well you’d better be ready to see a whole lot of “Warlock” in this one. As a Warlock you get two proficiencies from the Warlock skill list so learn about the History of Nagakabouros and also take Intimidation proficiency because I’m pretty fucking intimidated when an Illaoi comes into my lane if you know what I’m saying.

But unlike most classes Warlocks get to choose their subclass at level 1 and low-and-behold we’ll be going with the Lurker in the Deep Unearthed Arcana Patron which will soon be appearing in Tasha’s Cauldron of Everything. One may ask why I didn’t wait for that book to come out to which I reply “I need to make content.” Regardless you get Scion of the Deep at level 1 to communicate telepathically with (almost) any creature that has an innate swimming speed that’s within 120 feet of you. The creature can understand you regardless of your shared languages and can respond telepathically. Look all I’m saying is that you’ve gotta be able to talk with Nami somehow.

But of course what you’re really here for is Grasp of the Deep. As a bonus action you create a tentacle at a point you can see within 60 feet of you. The tentacle lasts for 1 minute or until you make another tentacle. When you create the tentacle, you can make a melee spell attack against a creature within 10 feet of it. On a hit, the target takes 1d8 cold or lightning damage (your choice when it takes the damage) and its speed is reduced by 10 feet until the start of your next turn. You can also move the tentacle up to 30 feet as a bonus action on your turn and repeat the attack with said bonus action. You can summon the tentacle a number of times equal to your Charisma modifier and regain all expended uses when you finish a long rest.

Yes I did just copy-paste the description of the ability because it’s a lot of words to say something very simple: make tentacle in 60 feet, slam people with bonus action, move it up to 30 feet per round.

But unlike in League you get more than just tentacles at level 1! You also have access to Pact Magic! You can learn two cantrips from the Warlock list: Lightning Lure lets you pull your opponent’s not-quite-soul closer towards you, and Eldritch Blast is an Eldritch Blast that lets you Eldritch Blast; I’m not going to pretend you don’t know what this cantrip is.

You also get two spells from the Warlock list and now it’s time to just take any spell that has the name “Hadar” in it. Arms of Hadar lets you strike everyone near you with tentacles; isn’t it fun to get your ultimate at level 1? For some sort-of Soul Stealing action I’m actually going to recommend Witch Bolt: after hitting an enemy with the spell you can keep hitting them from a distance and they can’t do anything about it! Truthfully though there are a lot of really great spells for this build at first level and I’m sad I can’t list them all, so if you don’t like my spell picks try out:

Hellish Rebuke (Thornmail)

Hex

Protection from Evil and Good

Thunderwave (Subclass-specific spell, otherwise known as “better Arms of Hadar that aren’t tentacles so they’re actually worse)

Yeah level 1 is always overloaded.

LEVEL 2 - WARLOCK 2

Second level Warlocks get access to Eldritch Invocations to improve their abilities, and you know what we still need? A proper ability to rip out people’s souls. Shame we won’t get that, but Grasp of Hadar will pull them closer and Lance of Lethargy will slow them for trying to escape their Test of Spirit. These invocations do stack (IE there’s no rule saying you can’t apply both at once) so you can theoretically pull someone 10 feet closer to you and make them 10 feet slower, resulting in 20 total feet of distance you’re gaining on them.

You can also learn another spell at this level and while there are plenty of good ones I’m going to suggest some Thornmail, or rather Armor of Agathys. The spell doesn’t require Concentration, gives you some bulk, and makes enemies think twice about hitting you. And it scales well too!

LEVEL 3 - WARLOCK 3

So how about we get something big to bonk our enemies with? Hello Pact of the Blade! In short you make a weapon in your hands to fight with, and I’d argue that a Maul is probably the closest to a big two-handed bludgeoning weapon.

I should mention that technically you need the Improved Pact Weapon invocation to be able to cast spells while you have a weapon in two hands, but you can get around this by using a component pouch instead of a focus. (And Illaoi seems the type to cast with squid organs.)

Oh and you can learn second level spells now! Spells like Earthbind to make sure your foes don’t take to the sky to escape the wrath of the ocean.

LEVEL 4 - WARLOCK 4

4th level Warlocks get an Ability Score Improvement so it’s time to invest in your main stat: Strength! What was that? Charisma? No no silly Warlocks use Strength obviously, so put +2 into that.

You also learn another spell at this level, and another cantrip! For your cantrip Mage Hand will let you summon a little tentacle for you to grab smaller things at a distance. As for leveled spells Ray of Enfeeblement will let you pack Exhaust for your foes, reducing their attack damage. It’s a bit of a dirty trick but Nagakabouros doesn’t fight fair.

(Artwork by ERDJIE on DeviantArt)

LEVEL 5 - WARLOCK 5

5th level Warlocks get another Invocation so guess what we’re taking? Yup: Eldritch Smite, pretty much a given whenever I make a Pact of the Blade build. This will let you slam your foes so hard that they fall over! I’m also going to suggest you replace Lance of Lethargy with Thirsting Blade, as by this point Grasp of Hadar is already pulling them close enough thanks to two Eldritch Blasts per turn.

You can also learn another spell at this level and remember when I said we’d take any spell with the name “Hadar” in the title? Hunger of Hadar lets you make an area pitch black and summon a bunch of tentacles in that area. Basically Hadar is this world’s Nagakabouros. "Bearded Lady, Nagakabouros, names don't matter! Action does."

LEVEL 6 - WARLOCK 6

At 6th level your tentacles finally have some lifesteal! And by lifesteal I mean defensive properties. Guardian Grasp lets you use your reaction to make a tentacle shield an ally from a hit, reduce the damage they would’ve taken from an attack by half. The tentacle can shield any ally within 10 feet of it, and it disappears after defending them. Note that this works for spells too, so if someone’s having their soul ripped out of them you can use your abilities to pull it right back in!

Additionally your servitude to the Bearded Lady grants you a Fathomless Soul for the ability to breathe underwater, a swimming speed, and resistance to Cold damage.

And finally you can learn another spell like the Unearthed Arcana spell Spirit Shroud. This spell will let you slow enemies that are near you and also do extra damage.

LEVEL 7 - WARLOCK 7

7th level Warlocks get another Invocation but there’s nothing that particularly interests me. May as well get Devil’s Sight in case you’re playing against a Nocturne.

You can also learn another spell at this level and hey look more tentacles! Evard’s Black Tentacles is a subclass-specific spell that makes tentacles that can hold people down!

LEVEL 8 - WARLOCK 8

8th level Warlocks get another Ability Score Improvement: increase your Strength by 1 and your Constitution by 1, as those are your two main stats as a Warlock. Definitely.

You can also add another spell to your list, and while there are plenty of great choices I’d opt to rid yourself of the unworthy with Banishment.

(Artwork by Diazex on DeviantArt)

LEVEL 9 - WARLOCK 9

9th level Warlocks get access to another Eldritch Invocation, but again none of these are that particularly interesting so I suppose you could grab Otherworldly Leap for the Jump spell at will?

But you get access to another spell and if you need guidance from Nagakabouros then Commune with Nature will let you gather information to aid you to spread your faith.

Now (or ideally sometime before) would also probably be a good time to replace a lot of your old spells, so depending on your DM here’s some spells you should probably swap out, and what they should be swapped to:

Arms of Hadar (RIP tentacles) with Vampiric Touch (3rd level) for some lifesteal. (Enervation at the 5th level is also a decent alternative that works at range.)

Witch Bolt with Dimension Door (4th level) for a Teleport back to lane.

Earthbind with Synaptic Static (5th level) for a Leap of Faith against your foes. (By that I mean it’s my build and I like this spell.)

Ray of Enfeeblement with Cone of Cold (5th level) for another powerful AoE spell in a teamfight.

LEVEL 10 - WARLOCK 10

At 10th level Lurker in the Deep Warlocks can feed their god’s Devouring Maw. As an action you can create a 10 foot radius sphere centered on a point you can see within 60 feet. Each creature in that area must succeed on a Strength saving throw or be restrained. And then: teeth... this feels like Pyke’s thing. Regardless any creature that starts its turn in the area takes 3d6 cold / lightning damage (your choice.)

Restrained creature can try to get out on their action, and at the start of your turn if anyone is in the area you gain temporary hit points equal to your Warlock level. You can use this ability once per short or long rest, so essentially consider it like an extra spell that’s exclusive to you and your faith.

Speaking of extra spells you don’t get another spell known but your tentacles do more damage now: 2d8 to be exact. You also get another cantrip: Minor Illusion will let you summon more small ghost tentacles, except these ones don’t do anything except for fool the enemy into thinking they’ll have a fun laning phase.

LEVEL 11 - WARLOCK 11

11th level Warlocks get their 6th level Mystic Arcanum, which is a spell you can only use once per Long Rest. Basically it’s a regular spell slot, unlike your Warlock slots which come back on a short rest. Unfortunately there really aren’t a lot of Mystic Arcanum options, and the ones at level 6 aren’t spectacular. Circle of Death is probably the best even if the lore is a little iffy.

You can also add another Pact Magic spell to your list: many say that a Dream is a window into one’s soul, so messing with people’s dreams only makes sense for you to test their souls. Oh and you get a third spell slot for your Pact Magic! Yay!

LEVEL 12 - WARLOCK 12

12th level Warlocks get an Ability Score Improvement but I’m going to instead suggest the Resilient feat for Constitution, increasing your CON to a 14 and giving you proficiency in CON saves. Constitution is one of your main stats as a Warlock after all!

You also get another Eldritch Invocation and now it’s finally time for an invocation we will keep! Lifedrinker will let you add your Charisma modifier as damage to your weapon attacks. I know it’s such a weird thing for Warlocks to have since they rarely use Charisma, but it’s still useful!

(Artwork by sharrm on DeviantArt)

LEVEL 13 - WARLOCK 13

At level 13 you get your 7th level Mystic Arcanum. To test weak souls Power Word Pain will see how much they can take before they reach their limit. If a target is at 100 HP or less they are affected by crippling pain. Their speed can be no higher than 10 feet, they have disadvantage on attack rolls, ability checks, and saving throws (other than CON saves), and if the target tries to cast a spell, it must first succeed on a Constitution saving throw, or the casting fails and the spell is wasted.

A target suffering this pain can make a Constitution saving throw at the end of each of its turns. On a successful save, the pain ends. While this may seem weak this doesn’t require your concentration, and can set up for all your allies to break the nonbelievers.

You can also add another Pact Magic spell to your list like Elemental Bane. Here’s the trick: pick a damage type of your tentacles that your allies are also doing. This will make both them and your tentacles stronger!

LEVEL 14 - WARLOCK 14

14th level Lurker in the Deep Warlocks get their final ability, Unleash the Depths. As an action, you choose a point within 30 feet of you to summon a manifestation of Nagakabouros. You then have one of two options:

Transport. You and up to five willing creatures of your choice that you can see within 30 feet of the manifestation point are grasped by spectral tentacles and teleported to a point of your choice within 100 miles that you have visited within the past 24 hours.

Fury. You can direct a barrage of spectral tentacles to strike up to five creatures you can see within 30 feet of the manifestation point. Each target must make a Dexterity saving throw against your spell save DC. On a failed save, the creature takes 6d10 cold or lightning damage (your choice) and is knocked prone. On a successful save, it takes half as much damage and is not knocked prone. The tentacles then vanish.

You can only do this once per Long Rest, so you can essentially consider it another Mystic Arcanum of sorts.

LEVEL 15 - WARLOCK 15

15th level Warlocks get their 8th level Mystic Arcanum and to truly test one’s faith try Feeblemind. You choose a target to damage and force them to make an Intelligence save: if they fail their Intelligence and Charisma become 1 and they become unable to do most things that require thinking. (Detailed in the spell.) This spell lasts for thirty days unless healed by a specific spell, afterwards they can try to repeat the save.

But more importantly you get some more Invocations and sweet Bearded Lady we can finally get some good ones! Grab Witch Sight to know the truth behind one’s soul.

And you get one more Pact Magic spell like Sickening Radiance to exhaust the spirit... because it causes Exhaustion... the D&D status not the LoL Summoner Spell.

LEVEL 16 - WARLOCK 16

16th level means an Ability Score Improvement so it’s finally time to stop beating around the bush: get more Charisma so Lifedrinker is better. There really isn’t much other use for it.

(Artwork by Riot Games)

LEVEL 17 - WARLOCK 17

At 17th level you get your 9th level Mystic Arcanum; the strongest spell you can cast! When a soul is too weak to fight it must die: Power Word Kill will instantly kill a target with 100 health or less.

In addition you learn more Pact Magic: by this point your foes should truly Fear you (and the fact that I’m not allowed to take any spell that creates undead.) Yes most enemies by this point can resist fears, but on the bright side you finally have four spell slots for your other spells! (Or Smites.)

LEVEL 18 - WARLOCK 18

18th level Warlocks get their final Eldritch Invocation: Visions of Distant Realms will let you use the vision of the Bearded Lady to see across all of Runeterra... or at least as far as Arcane Eye lets you.

LEVEL 19 - WARLOCK 19

19th level Warlocks get our final Ability Score Improvement and yeah: Charisma for Lifedrinker... among other things.

And you get your final Pact Magic spell: take Hold Monster as the final option to keep an enemy down as you beat them into shape.

LEVEL 20 - WARLOCK 20

20th level Warlocks are Eldritch Masters. You can spend 1 minute praying to regain all your expended Pact Magic slots. Once you regain spell slots with this feature, you must finish a long rest before you can do so again.

...I mean yeah you could just spend an hour to Short Rest, but being able to get 4 more 5th level spell slots in just a minute could be useful! ...Maybe...

FINAL BUILD

PROS

They need wisdom; they don't need teeth - Even though you only have two attacks as a “casting” class you do plenty of damage thanks to Lifedrinker and your tentacles. (Assuming you’re using a Maul) you’re doing 4d6 + 10 bludgeoning, an extra 8 necrotic, and an extra 2d8 of Lightning or Cold damage with your Bonus Action. If you take the averages of those numbers you’re going to be doing about 44 damage per turn! Not to mention Eldritch Smites to truly break their spirits!

Blessed is motion - Your AC shouldn’t be terrible with Medium Armor, but the real strength is in Guardian Grasp. Being able to reduce the damage of an attack by half is universally useful. Above-average HP (thanks to a good CON mod) definitely helps too.

I am a teacher; Bilgewater will learn - Despite your weak mental stats you have a good amount of utility with proficiency in a number of skills and spells to gather information like Arcane Eye, Commune With Nature, and Dream. Not to mention Witch Sight which will see through any illusions or shapeshifting. This means you’re a fighter who can see through invisibility!

CONS

If I hate something, I destroy it - Illaoi is a big lady, and while her physical abilities may be strong her mental capabilities are a little lacking. Your Wisdom saves are fine enough thanks to Proficiency but your Intelligence and Dexterity saves are rather subpar, and as mentioned earlier your Ability Checks aren’t going to be great thanks to your low mental.

My god is not love; it is a kick in the pants - All the memeing I did in this build aside the focus on Strength over Charisma was probably not the brightest, especially considering that the hit chance of your tentacles is based on your Charisma. See if you can get Point Buy for this build instead to max out Strength and Charisma: Medium Armor was taken more for cosmetic than anything, and Heavy Armor would probably be a better choice. And of course feel free to take Charisma ASIs early if you think you need them.

Something sleeps inside us, and seldom awakens - Truthfully while 9th level spells an extra invocations are nice this build would’ve probably benefited a lot more from some Fighter or Paladin levels to get a Fighting Style and subclass features. I built this build Warlock-exclusive partially for flavor and partially to show that melee Warlocks are possible outside of Hexblade, but 5 levels into Fighter or Paladin would get you Extra Attack (so you wouldn’t need Thirsting Blade) along with other class features. And starting as Fighter or Paladin would let you take armor proficiency too, so you wouldn’t need a feat for it! (You could grab something like Great Weapon Master instead!)

But here you have it: a level 20 Warlock build, a melee Warlock that isn’t Hexblade, a devout character with no Cleric levels, a Tasha’s build before Tasha’s comes out, and a powerful melee fighter with good use of their Bonus Action and plenty of utility through spellcasting. As long as you live life to its fullest and grab every combat by the reigns then Nagakabouros shall be pleased. Test the nonbelievers and strike at the heart of corruption! For it is her way... to get camped all game by the jungler... and still get double kills.

(Artwork by epimeral on DeviantArt)

#dnd #dnd build #dnd guide #dnd warlock #it's literally just warlock #yup no fighter #League of Legends #League of Legends Illaoi #DnD 5e #Nagakabouros #tentacles #Tumblr ToS

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nerexchan666 · 4 years ago

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Why Tlou2 isn’t a good game

First I want to start with rants and opinions of gameplay channels (I had to type all these down while listening. They’re not in any way manipulated,if u want, u can watch the videos urself)

pewdiepie:

''everything was a mess''

''the game had a lot of potential to be good''

''would i play it again? no i wouldn’t.''

''they tried something different and i don’t think it really worked.''

''it didn’t fit the last of us''

''half the game was abby...its fucking crazy''

''give it a rating? uhhh...probably like a 6 out of 10. I’m not really passionate about this shit''

tyler1:

''joel's not stupid''

''okay i understand Ellie not killing Abby cuz she was in such a shitty spot,but why would the devs even do that?''

''no body gets a moment except for Abby''

''this entire game was such a waste of fucking time, don’t even make the third one.''

''this shit was so sad to play''

''there was no progress made anywhere,you’re just running back and forth''

''why did we play as abby for so long''

''why was i forced to beat the shit out of Ellie as Abby''

''this whole game is a fucking message''

''sex scenes were out of place,you just added it to add it''

''you should be ashamed of yourselves,devs''

''i don’t like how stupid the characters were, you develop characters and in the end they do something the opposite''

''(the part in aquarium when they forgot the map) you’re telling me TOMMY,okay i understand ellie might forget cuz it was her first time killing a pregnant woman, she MIGHT forget,lets give it a benefit of the doubt,Tommy is not a dumbass, never in the million years would he forget it (the map) and it was right by her feet''

''they’re not stupid''

''joel is almost 60 years old,he survived for 40+ or 30+ years,and he's that dumb? oh get the fuck out of here''

''same way when earlier in the game,when joel and tommy,again they were apparently biggest fucking idiots in the game, followed two random people into a trap, and joel dies. bullshit''

''you’re gonna throw all that away and have joel be a fucking r*t*rd?''

''and then tommy,who is his equal? absolutely not.''

''a second game in the series, from how good the first one was,to this game right here,this might be actually the worst game i ever played.''

''1 out of 10, simply because it ran''

''they literally shit all over ellie for no reason''

''(while playing as abby) literally fucked up my mood''

sodapoppin:

''the beginning of the game was god tier,because we had joel and ellie and other characters''

''and then we play as the fridge. Nothing in those 12 hours had anything to do with ellie or joel''

''it was just a bunch of i don’t give a fuck about whos and side quests''

''i really don’t give a fuck i’m sorry''

''they started with a 10 out of 10 game and converted to 2 out of 10''

''ellie and fridge have a fight,hype as fuck,NO ONE DIES,tommy who is a badass,,,THEY SHOT HIM IN THE HEAD''

''playing as fridge i cared so little,i literally tried to speedrun it''

''the ending was good,but i would’ve changed it a lot. Made it more about ellie''

theradbrad:

''i didn’t like when she was holding dina down,ellie told her she was pregnant and she said good,if lev wasn’t there..

i feel like,,,i don’t want a good ending for abby at all''

''i still feel no attachment to abby like i do with ellie''

''I feel like they were trying to make you feel bad for her (like manipulation)''

''we didn’t know Joel was going to die hours into the game in such a way that’s so unlike him''

''i felt like they wanted to make abby's portions of the game more memorable, by making them better. Doesn't mean the character's better''

''they put a lot of the most exciting parts of the game,the haven being burned down,the horse ride out of there,that alone was more exciting

than anything in ellie's portion''

''i personally didn’t like abby's character,i like some stuff she did besides killing joel''

''and i didn’t like any of her friends. I didn't care when owen died,i hated when pregnant girl had to die''

''i cared for jesse,he was probably the most underrated character in the entire game''

''i don’t like what happened to any character. One character i didn't feel bad for was abby's dad,like joel killing her dad.. good. And ellie should've at least appreciated that and i think she slowly realized towards the end of the game: Joel did this for me''

''but after everything is over,she let her (abby) live. We all wanted her to die,but i had a feeling something like that wasn't going to be the case''

''but i think she beat her down good''

''did i like it? i did like some events of the game,i didn’t like some characters,i didn't like abby, i liked her story,i didn't like the fact that she killed joel,like i didn't like her from the jump,but over time i like that she helped lev''

''how joel died was so uncharacteristic. He didn't trust anyone in the first game,he wouldn't even give out his name,he was driving over people with a truck''

''the game wanted me to feel bad for abby but i don't care about her. I cared more about what happened to lev''

''the game wasn't bad''

now, here are some videos that are worth watching:

youtube

also,AngryJoe has a good video about the last of us 2, check that out as well. My point is, people blatantly defending this game are in denial. ‘’You are manipulated to like joel!!!!’’ no. What they gave showed us about Joel in the first game served as a backstory as to why is Joel the way he is. He doesn’t trust anyone, isn’t attached to anyone simply because if they die and he cared about them,it would once again destroy him. The only person he trusted the most was Tess (and tommy),yet we see Tess sacrifice herself and we clearly see how upset Joel is over her death. It’s basic storytelling.The giraffe part of the game served as a small break from the dark stuff that keeps happening. It was a small moment of joy and peace for both Ellie and Joel (The giraffe symbolizes grace, peace, individuality, protection, communication). I’d say they’re manipulating us to like Abby,a very disliked character because of her actions. They’re showing her in a better light than Ellie (example below):

‘‘But that’s just some gaming channels, only the minority dislike the game!!!’‘ Nope.

these are just some comments out of thousands and thousands of other that voice their displeasure (last one was about the vaccine and how killing Ellie is pointless).

The sales have dropped by 80%, many MANY people are selling their copies on various sites,because they realized the leaks were true and the story is a complete mess. (It’s mostly japanese players that are selling their copies, so u could say they’re least satisfied).

Is the game bad? yes, in some ways. Is it complete trash? no. The graphics are out of this world, voice acting is absolutely amazing.

This is not an attack to people who enjoyed this game, this serves as an example and explanation as to why people dislike this game.

It’s definitely not a 10/10 game. It has a lot of flaws. It’s more like 5/10 or weak 6/10. I personally didn’t enjoy 90% of the game. I was p stoked when it got announced. After i found out about the leaks (which was just joel’s death, nothing else) i still gave this game and the devs a benefit of the doubt.

p.s. review bombing this game with positive scores doesn’t make u any better than those who review bombed it with negative scores. And don’t attack actors because of this game, especially Laura Bailey (Abby’s actor).

(if i made any mistakes, my bad, i’m not a native english speaker)

#the last of us #the last of us 2 #joel miller #ellie williams #dina #tlou part 2 #abby anderson #video games #gaming #the last of us part two #tlou2 #tlou part ii

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nochiquinn · 4 years ago

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campaign 2 episode 103: [sasha nein voice] compelling

samuel WHAT is your HAIR

did you bleach it and forget to leave enough time to recolor it?

he bleached it and missed his sideburns

allura bailey

no let's, let's get into it

everyone trying to ask about keyleth without metagaming

where's the pigeon, we need the pigeon

"the VO community is very important to us" sam

sam's FLASK

"it's forbidden" "let's fuckin go"

man I want the traveler to meet vilya

"you look like someone whose boyfriend I strangled once"

"if someone says 'don't go to the butthole' that's the first place you go" "weLL"

the butthole is where the sun don't shine

the balleater got balleaten

f in the chat

"caleb agrees with me! he said I was smart!"

The Vibe

every time they say "heaven falls" I get "Heaven's Drive" by l'arc en ciel stuck in my head

"I'll take [beau] and yasha" the eyebrows

"he'll be pissed"

"owl go with you" "you are fired"

laura hiding from her 1 behind her hair

oh no owls can't tell time

jesfish

rip sprinkle you know I was half-joking about vilya being in an abusive relationship with vocodo but the more I hear...

"buttholes and shit. episode title."

ARTAGAN

dammit that's cute

artagan is a DICK but he loves jester and that makes it hard for me to hate him completely

-6 modifier

"should I jump in?" beaufish

so what do y'all think marisha's new character is gonna be

chat: You can take Keyleth out of the campaign but you can't take the Keyleth out of Marisha

it's the Buttcrack

every time liam speaks up at the end of an RP scene I know he's gonna make it sad but SIR

this is the first time caduceus has seen molly's face and I'm crying about it

yesssSSS

marisha's crying

I'm also crying

"can you move this memory over here so I can fall asleep to it?" this is a hate crime

oh god. oh no.

artagan only stops jester from forgetting HIM. everything else is fair game

oh thank god

mattholomew mercer

no irl shoulder grab ;-;

campaign 2 was so short

feathers!!!

grog?

staff? druid staff? extremely waterlogged druid staff?

"oh my god it's the chair"

secret tunnelllll

I don't like when matt says "okay" like he was waiting for something

evolution speedrun

big ol nuts

"kill him"

sitting on your friend who is ENTIRELY too high and trying to fight God behind the Denny's

excited to see tal's new character

#crtitical role #crititag #spoilers #liveblog #reaction post

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medea10 · 5 years ago

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My Review of Bludgeoning Angel Dokuro-Chan

A random guy being struck in the head with a spiked-bat and having his entire skull swiped away in a bloody mess. You’d think I would have picked this up in 2007 when I picked up a punch of other absurd animes like Super Milk Chan. But time does make fools out of all of us. And because the randomizer is being a dick to me currently, I’m now stuck with this ridiculous mess. A student who disappears and no one noticed a thing. The class rep randomly turns into a monkey. Another boy randomly turns into a Shiba Inu. The male protagonist gets half of his skull sliced off and is magically better five seconds later (and the last one happens numerous times throughout the series).

That my friends, is the magic of Dokuro-Chan! Dokuro Mitsukai is an angel sent to the past to take care of a problem that will shape the very future. She was sent to kill a high school boy named Sakura Kusakabe. And before I continue the synopsis, I think this is the first time I’ve ever heard of a boy with the name “Sakura”. Amazing! Anyways, the reason why Sakura has a hit by angels in the future is because in the future, Sakura will come up with a way to stop females from developing at the age of 12 and these women stay like that forever. So imagine if a 67 year old girl looks like a 10 year old! Wow, that’s…oh so illegal! That is just raising the Lolita-fetish by 3000%! Well, Dokuro has taken a liking to Sakura and thinks she can find a way around this without killing him. However, other angels like Sabato Mihashigo and Dokuro’s sister Zakuro think he needs to be destroyed. And every episode we watch as this boy gets whacked eight ways from Sunday! Yeah, this anime is balls-to-the-wall out there, filled with poop jokes, panty-shots, crude humor, and absurdity on Pop Team Epic levels. BETWEEN THE SUB AND THE DUB: So back in the day, this anime was carried by Media Blasters and given an English dub. Now Media Blasters is still around! It’s just that a lot of their older animes have died off and it’s up to other companies to give it a good home. So now Discotek licensed it. The dub has many recognizable voices who thankfully went on to do better things like Wendee Lee, Mela Lee, Laura Bailey, and Johnny Yong Bosch. But again, you have to start somewhere in this business!

And I do find it funny that voice actress Mela Lee makes a call back to this particular anime. When Lee was in Durarara, she said the signature line Dokuro says and hearing her in this makes me giggle. Here’s what you might recognize these folks from. JAPANESE CAST: *Dokuro is played by Saeko Chiba (known for Nagihiko on Shugo Chara, Nina on Code Geass, Miu on NANA, Azmaria on Chrono Crusade, Ruby on Rosario to Vampire, and Neko Musume on xxxHOLiC Kei) *Sakura is played by Reiko Takagi (known for Tadase on Shugo Chara, Holly on Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure: Part 2, Su on Love Hina, and Young Bon on Blue Exorcist) ENGLISH CAST: *Dokuro is played by Wendee Lee (known for Faye on Cowboy Bebop, Konata on Lucky Star, Kirigakure on Blue Exorcist, Yoruichi on Bleach, Yui on Fushigi Yugi, Moegi on Naruto, and Haruhi Suzumiya) *Sakura is played by Johnny Yong Bosch (known for Ichigo on Bleach, Lelouch on Code Geass, Makoto on Free!, Izaya on Durarara, Artemis on Sailor Moon redub, Koizumi on Haruhi Suzumiya, and Yukio on Blue Exorcist) SHIPPING: So it’s obvious that Sakura has eyes for Shizuki, a random girl in his class. But she’ll never express her feelings. At the end of several episodes, she has this face of disappointment given towards Sakura. Probably because the mood is always broken by one Dokuro-chan!

Dokuro seems to like Sakura as she hasn’t tried to kill him and made it stick. Every time she would destroy his body, she would always repair it. Any other angel with the mission of killing Sakura would have laid waste to this kid by the end of episode one. But Dokuro doesn’t want to do so as she likes Sakura. Hell, she defied orders from her superiors, including her younger sister to be with this guy. However, she wouldn’t hesitate killing him for accidentally copping a feel! GUILTY PLEASURE: Pipiru piru piru pipiru pi

…I like the OP theme… I’m officially going to Hell for saying that. ENDING: Well this series is only 4 episodes (or eight 13-minute episodes). Each episode is filled with angel-laced crack and several times an episode we watch as Sakura is disembodied by a spiked-bat. You know, usual shit for an anime like this! So the final episode has Dokuro wanting to start her own club at the school. And hearing Wendee Lee as Dokuro, I am immediately having vivid nightmares of the S.O.S. brigade when she’s talking about joining a club. Much to my dismay, it’s so much worse…for Sakura! Well all that fun and frivolity comes to a sudden stop when the school is visited by Dokuro’s baby sister, Zaruko.

WHO IS NINE YEARS OLD?! DA FUCK, JAPAN?! Because Dokuro broke protocol by not doing away with Sakura like her original mission indicated, she was to immediately go back with her sister and receive a penalty for her crimes. Meanwhile, everything on earth will go back to normal and no one will remember any of this mess. But Dokuro doesn’t want to leave because she loves living with Sakura. Now Sakura has a decision to make. He can either have Dokuro leave and never come back or continue having a loli angel live in his closet and decapitate him every other day. Sakura chooses the latter. But Zaruko ends up taking her away…only for Dokuro to escape. She ends up returning back to Sakura’s room and when he came back thinking things were going to go back to boring life as normal, he’s decapitated. Aw, so abnormality wins in the end!

SEASON TWO: Why is Dokuro’s hair teal-colored now? Oh who the fuck cares? It’s only two episodes! It’s just more random shenanigans. Only now, you’ve got both Dokuro and Zakuro living with Sakura. What else do I have to say, the final two episodes were just more of the same with Sakura being impaled every couple of minutes or so, Sakura striking out with Shizuki, and getting in all sorts of trouble caused by Dokuro. We even get a meaningless cameo from Sabato’s mother who tries to take her daughter back to their time but gives up by the end of the episode. And then mentions something about Dokuro being related to…oh who the fuck cares?! Finally we end up with a bizarre Valentine’s episode. And the series really doesn’t end on any kind of note. It’s just the final episode with no real conclusion and ended like any other regular episode. It’s been 12 years since this anime ever saw the light of day and let’s keep it that way. What the hell did I just watch?

Seriously, this show is just balls-to-the-wall insane. And this is the same person who found some sort of sense and sanity in watching something like Excel Saga. This is like if Super Milk Chan and Puni Puni Poemi had sex and this show was the product of that mess. And then you just fill it with the most absurd things in the world like people being decapitated, panty shots, side-boobs, nip-slips, poop jokes, diarrhea jokes, crude jokes, random cameos from Kim Jong Il and George W. Bush, and random students turning into real life animals (including a baboon, giraffe, and shiba inu). It was all quite insane. Only, AND ONLY IF you are feeling extra curious that I would recommend stumbling upon and watch this. If you’re not a fan of blood, I wouldn’t recommend it. I know the blood-shed that’s used is mostly supposed to be funny (I guess?), but there’s a lot of it. The animation is nothing too special. The comedy is kinda hit-and-miss with me. Then again, there are only 6 episodes and if you’re bored, go ahead and watch this. Okay, now that this nightmare is over, what’s the next anime I’m watching in this category? Nozomi Entertainment/Discotek/Shit made before Fall 1986, and go!

Marmalade Boy! Oh good, I’m always in the mood for a cute shoujo anime. Medea, it’s also surprise incest! Wait, WHAT?! DAMMIT 2019!

#anime review #bludgeoning angel dokuro-chan #bokusatsu tenshi dokuro chan #dokuro mitsukai #sakura kusakabe #zakuro mitsukai

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queenrandomblogs · 5 years ago

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Who would've thought?

[Warning: Some swear words ahead]

━━━━━━━ ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:**:･ﾟ✧:･ﾟ✧ ━━━━━━━

Soulmates. People who were destined to be together. Some say it's a myth. Some say otherwise. But one thing stays the same. Every person on this planet has the chance to meet their soulmate. It was obvious from the initials seemingly tattooed to their wrist since their birth.

It was every little children's dream to meet their soulmate and get together with them. After all, they were meant to be, were they no?

"Are you listening?" The words snapped a brunette out of her thoughts as she looked up to see the gazes of her friends. She finally registered what they asked and smiled sheepishly. It was obvious she hadn't been listening. Her friends merely rolled their eyes at this, already used to her zoning out every so often. "Come on, Mackenna. Stop zoning out," One of her friends, Sapphire spoke as she she gently shoved Mackenna as a joke. A laugh escaped Mackenna's lips as she shook her head. "As if you can say anything Sapphire. You zone out every class!" Her retort caused laughter to erupt between all of them as they knew just how true Mackenna's words were.

After they calmed down, Kaylee, one of Mackenna's first friends, decided to ask the question that was burning on all of Mackenna's friends' mind. "What were you think about?" The girl in question said nothing as she merely grabbed her left wrist and began to rub the initials that were seemingly tattooed on it. Her actions were an answer in it of itself. A somber silence took place between the six friends as they all remembered one memory.

While Soulmates were really common in their world, there was still a possibility that you won't meet your own soulmate. Besides, even if you do find out who they were, it's not an absolute possibility that you'll get together. That was the ugly truth that the the friends came to a realization back when they were but freshmen and Kaylee... Well, let's just say, she found her soulmate yet her soulmate continued to be together with another girl and Kaylee was forced to only be friends with the guy she was supposed to end up with. Cruel, ain't it?

Marlene, one of their friends and a junior by one year, decided to break the somber atmosphere. "We should get going. Mathematics is our next class." Laura and Kaleb — both in Marlene's year and Kaleb being the only boy between the six of them — nodded mutely in agreement. Sapphire cleared her throat and nodded. "Yeah, you should go. Ma'am Jennifer isn't the kindest to late students." The three juniors nodded before going to the direction their Mathematics class was held in, leaving the three seniors all alone as two of them wondered how to handle this situation.

"Kay—" "We should go." Kaylee didn't give Sapphire or Mackenna a chance to speak as she cut them off and began to walk to their next class. Sapphire and Mackenna shared a glance and the former gave the latter a small, encouraging smile knowing how the latter felt guilty for basically bringing the subject up. Even if it had been years since then, it was still a sore subject for Kaylee. After all, her soulmate did basically left her for a girl he wasn't supposedly destined with. It was...tragic. A sigh escaped Mackenna's lips before the two then followed Kaylee to their next class. It shouldn't have been this way. Kaylee was supposed to get together with her soulmate. That had been their plans since...since the moment they found out about soulmates but of course, fate wasn't on their side.

"Okay. Class dismissed." The words erupted cheers from the class as they all began to pack their stuff. That class was their last class of the day and quite frankly, all of them were ready to go back home and take a rest for forever. Among the class were Mackenna, Kaylee, and Sapphire. They were three of the few people who decided to stay behind and do whatever. Mackenna was packing her bags when a movement from her side caught her eyes. She glanced up only to see their class heartthrob, Miles Johnson Bailey.

M. J. B.

The same initials tattooed on her wrist. Yet, somehow Mackenna had a feeling he wasn't her soulmate. She didn't know why or what but she just knew for a fact that they weren't meant to be. No matter how many times they unknowingly "flirted" with one another. They weren't actually flirting, they were just talking. That's all. But her friends didn't believe her and continued to tease her with Miles. As if they could ever be "the one" for each other.

Miles felt someone staring at him before looking back to meet Mackenna's eyes. Her cheeks flushed at being caught but Miles wasn't judging. In fact, he sent her a warm smile before turning around and leaving. "If that wasn't a sign that you two are meant to be, I don't know what is." Mackenna blinked at that and turned to see Kaylee and Sapphire smirking at her. "How many times do I have to tell you?" Her response ended with a small laugh despite her seriousness. "Miles and I aren't each other's soul mates!" Mackenna exclaimed as she ended her response only to roll her eyes as she saw both her friends unconvinced. "Yeah right," spoke Kaylee as she adjusted her hold on her bag. "Tell us, Mackie. What's the initials tattooed on your wrist?" Mackenna didn't even get the chance to answer as Sapphire did that for her. "M. J. B. Which also happens to be Miles' initials, mind you."

Mackenna rolled her eyes at her two friends before shouldering her bag. "Just because he has the same initials tattooed on my wrist, doesn't automatically mean he's my soulmate." A scoff escaped Kaylee's and Sapphire's lips. "I'm serious. Besides, he probably doesn't have my initials tattooed on his wrist," Mackenna defended as the three of them began to walk outside the class.

"You act as if you don't have a crush on him." Fuck. As much as Mackenna loves her two friends, she wished they weren't as sharp as they were. How the hell did they know she had a crush on Miles? Was it that obvious? Oh god. What if the rest of the school finds out? No! That would be bad. Real bad. Especially considering their school's record of having a lot of drama. You must be wondering why she's panicking. It's just a crush. But it isn't. No matter how much she denies it, Mackenna is hopelessly in love with Miles. The only reason she denies it is because she has this imagination that if she denied it then maybe they could get together? It's silly, she knows. But she's young and in love. And because of that, even when it was obviously silly, she still believed in it. Because she's in love with him. So hopelessly in love, it hurts. If everyone found out... That wouldn't be good. "Don't worry. The only one who knows are the two of us. You hid it pretty well," Sapphire comforted the panicked brunette only to fall on deaf ears as Mackenna stopped at the sight before her.

She felt as if she couldn't breathe. It was like the walls were closing in on her. Like her world just suddenly stopped spinning. She wanted to puke and cry then puke again. Her throat already felt dry as she continued to stare at the sight that met her eyes, not knowing how her usually lively brown eyes went blank which concerned her two friends. "Mackie?" The said brunette snapped out of it as she heard the call of her nickname. "Yeah?" She mentally cursed as she realized the blank and almost broken tone she spoke in. "Are you...alright?" A sharp glare was sent in Kaylee's direction as Sapphire began to ask if Mackenna even looked alright to Kaylee by the use of her really expressive eyes. It was like she was screaming at Kaylee through her eyes.

Mackenna on the other hand stayed silent as she let one lone tear fall from her eyes before reaching out and wiping it. "Yeah, I'm fine." She wasn't. God, she wasn't. Why was she even trying to hide it? It was obvious she wasn't. But she knew the answer to that. Mackenna had so much pride that she refused to let anyone see her weakness even when it was so painfully obvious.

"You sure?"

"Definitely."

No, definitely not.

"You don't look so good..."

"What are you talking about, Saph? I'm just as fine as I should be."

Why? Why do I hide?

"If you say so..."

Her friends were obviously not believing her as she didn't even turn to look at them but knew better than to ask. They knew that no matter how much she's hurting, Mackenna would still continue to hide it. No matter what.

"Look guy, I'm fine."

I'm really not.

"There was just something in my eye."

I saw something I probably shouldn't have...

"It's nothing too serious though."

It makes me want to sob and curse everything.

"You don't have to worry about me."

But I won't tell you...

"I'll be just fine."

Because...

"I always will be..."

I'm afraid you won't care...

I always have been...

With that, Mackenna turned around and smiled at her friends before patting their shoulders and going the other way. The long route to the exit of the school. Despite Mackenna's words, Kaylee and Sapphire were both still worried about her. They've never seen her that sad before... The two looked at each other before turning to try and locate what Mackenna saw only for Kaylee to growl and for Sapphire to gasp.

There, in the middle of the hallway, stood Miles and Leah...in lip lock.

"Mackie. If you're hearing this, please call back. Kaylee and I have been worried about you. Please, Mackie..."

Mackenna listened to Sapphire's voice mail but did no move to call back like what her friend wanted her to do. After Sapphire and Kaylee saw what happened, they tried to catch up with Mackenna but the said girl ran her way outside of school, tears in her eyes and rain pouring as if to mourn with her. They hadn't heard from her since. You see, that school day not only had been their last school day of the week but also their last school day before spring break which meant that Mackenna didn't have to go back to school for a few weeks which was fine by her. More weeks to spend mourning about some stupid crush. But she knew it wasn't a stupid crush. She loved Miles from afar. If only she'd confessed before that... If only...

But Mackenna didn't want to ponder more on if onlys, mostly because it'll end up with her crying, as she continued to stare blankly at the ceiling of her bedroom. Her family was worried about her. Sure, they've seen her sad and heartbroken before. This wasn't her first crush after all. But they hadn't seen her so... so heart broken. And it's safe to say that they were lost on what to do. It wasn't helping that Mackenna refused to tell them the reason of her heartbreak. Like always, the brunette was too stubborn to admit that she was hurting. Damn her stubbornness...

"Sweetie," Her mom called from the other side of her door. "Open up, I have your dinner." Ah, yes. Dinner. Ever since she was heart broken, she never came down for food or anything which lead to her mother giving her the food herself. A sigh escaped Mackenna's lips. "I'm coming." She flinched when she heard her voice crack from the lack of use before slowly standing up. She then walked to the door and opened it to stare blankly at her mother who desperately tried to be positive. "Hey there." Whatever response her mother hoped to receive from her daughter didn't come true as Mackenna continued to stare at her mother before grabbing the plate of food and the glass of water. Her mother didn't argue as she watched Mackenna place the plate and glass somewhere before returning to her with the plate and glass her mother gave her for lunch a few hours ago. Mackenna took notice of how her mother tried not to frown as she noticed a portion of the food not eaten. Clearly, Mackenna hadn't been eating well.

Her mother opened her mouth to say something but was cut off when Mackenna closed the door. The brunette heard her mother sigh before turning around and sitting down, her back on the door. She knew how worried her parents and siblings were. But she couldn't help it. The image of Miles kissing someone else was still on her mind and didn't seem to be leaving any time soon which made her mood even worse. A laugh erupted somewhere outside making her perk up in curiosity. She slowly stood up and walked to the window of her room. Mackenna looked below and to the road of her neighborhood only to see kids playing. Oh. A sigh escaped her lips and she was about to go back to her sanctuary when she noticed a boy pedaling across her neighborhood with a bike. Curious yet inspired, Mackenna grabbed her flannel before walking downstairs. "Mackie? Where are you going dear? It's nearly 7!" Mackenna didn't respond to her mothers worries as she walked outside the house and to the garage. "I'm going biking! I won't be long!" Was all she said to her family before she, too, began pedaling across her neighborhood like the boy she saw before.

Mackenna closed her eyes as she felt the wind brush her face and a sigh of contentment escaped her lips. This was definitely refreshing. Her eyes snapped open and light seemed to appear again as she continued to bike. After days of being isolated in her room, fresh air was what she needed. A smile graced her lips as she began to close her eyes once more.

"Watch out!"

The warning had her snap her eyes open and quickly stop her bike. But she wasn't fast enough as she came in contact with another bike. The two bikes and it's riders fell on the ground as no one was fast enough to react to the sudden gravity. "Agh!" Mackenna laid on the road as she desperately tried to process what the absolute fuck happened. She then sat up slowly, groaning in pain as she does so before looking around and widening her eyes at the sight of the groaning boy beside her. "Are you alright?" She asked the boy as she helped him sit up. "I will be," The boy spoke softly which was cute. Wait, hold your horses. Cute? Mackenna get a grip on yourself! "Why were you biking with your eyes closed anyway?" The boy's question had her flush in embarrassment before crossing her arms in defiance.

"If you saw me biking with my eyes closed then why did you hit me still?" She shot back in defiance, too annoyed to understand what she just said. "Well excuse me for not having expected at girl biking with her eyes closed to appear from the turn i was about to take!" The boy retorted not in the mood to be pushed around by some girl. Mackenna realized what she just said and flinched. "Sorry."

The boy blinked at Mackenna's immediate change of attitude. He expected her to have shot back another argument but apparently he was wrong when she apologized. He took noticed of the flush on her cheeks and the sincerity in her beautiful eyes and couldn't help but note how cute she was. Okay... What the fuck did he just think? Hold you horses man. This girl was definitely beautiful. A beautiful girl like her definitely has a boyfriend... Wait, why the hell was he sad about that? She was just a stranger! A beautiful stranger... Okay, it was official. He hit his head too hard on the ground.

"It's alright," He spoke which shocked both Mackenna and him. The two didn't expect him to let it slide. In fact, both of them were expecting him to continue arguing with her. But something about her made him change his mind... "What's your name?"

"Why would I tell you?" Her response had him roll his eyes before glaring at her. "When I get into an accident, I'd rather like it if I know the name of who caused me to be in an accident."

Mackenna huffed and decided that there was no harm to it. After all, she wasn't in a mood to argue right now. "Fine then. I'm Mackenna, Mackenna Clara Sullivan." She reached her hand out to him for a handshake and took notice of the curiosity and excitement in his eyes. "How about you?"

"Matthew Jonas Black at your service." He reached out and shook her outstretched left hand with his right one as he smiled, which she mirrored.

M. J. B.

Wait, M. J. B.? Could it be...? Her eyes flickered down to his wrist only to see a familiar set of three letters.

M. C. S.

A bright smile graced her lips as her heart soared. She had found her soulmate. What a turn of events. Unlike Miles, Mackenna had a feeling that Matthew was her soulmate and he seemed to agree as he grinned. "Nice to meet you, Soulmate."

A laugh escaped her lips as she nodded back at him. "You too, Soulmate."

At that moment, things seemed to be all well. Somehow, meeting Matthew made her forget the heartbreak called Miles Johnson Bailey and that made her happy beyond belief. Even if they were both still sore from the fall or if her friends and family were probably worried out of their minds for Mackenna, being with Matthew just felt right.

'So this is what it feels like to be with your Soulmate Huh?' Mackenna mused to herself as she sat there, on the cement road, grinning widely at the boy named Matthew Jonas Black.

Yes, everything was all it should be.

"You know, when I thought of my soulmate, I didn't expect her to be crazy enough to bike with closed eyes."

...And they were back arguing again but this time, a small smile were both on their faces as they realized just who they are in each others lives.

They were soulmates.

Who would've thought that it would take one crazy stunt from Mackenna for the two of them to meet?

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cardinaldaughter · 6 years ago

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I love every member of the Mighty Nein; there’s not a single character I dislike, though admittedly I do have my favorites. But today I was thinking about how, for me, my realization of *how much* I loved each character individually came at such specific moments.

Jester: I loved Jester the first moment I saw her. But the first time I saw her was in a gif set on tumblr where she was talking about Tusk Love. I had no idea who Jester was, no idea who Laura Bailey was (though I was already deeply in love with Serana in Skyrim- I just didn’t know she was the voice actress). I saw several gif sets of Jester, and each one was hilarious. She’s the reason I watch this show. She’s what got me interested, and though I have since grown attached to other characters, I think deep down Jester will always have a special place in my heart as the catalyst for everything.

Beau: I liked Beau from the beginning. She was abrasive, cocky, self-righteous, and I liked that about her. And then I learned about Keyleth/Marisha hate and decided to like Beau on principle. Then Bowlgate happened and even though neither her or Caleb handled it great, I just... really appreciated how Marisha played her character so much. That was when Beau became my bae.

Nott: Listen, the moment Sam Riegel opened his mouth and that screechy-ass voice came out, I knew Nott was going to be a fucking treat. Then she said her name, and I was like “oh yeah. This little goblin girl is gonna fuck with me so great.” And then Nott described her relationship to Caleb- “I am the parent”- and I realized there was a well of yet-to-be-discovered-depth to this character and I was hooked.

Caleb: I actually was ambivalent to Caleb for a while. I didn’t dislike him but I didn’t get him. And then Yasha, Fjord, and Jester were captured. And Molly died. And Caleb was thrust into the forefront, and he struggled and had a panic attack after talking to Ophelia and he turned invisible in Lorenzo’s lair and was a mess of anxiety and adrenaline and rage, and his one-liner of “you should not have killed my cat.” Like. I AM Caleb, just without the story-specific-trauma and magic. That cat loving ball of anxiety who loves his friends but still feels so alone? Pot meet kettle. Fuck.

Fjord: When Uk’atoa took his powers, and he ran outside, panicked, alone, and feeling so small, this past episode, I just... wanted to hug my half-orc boy so bad I couldn’t stand it. The look on his face when that little bird illusion appeared in his hand? Oh boy. My emotions. I’ve always liked Fjord, but I never really connected with him. But seeing him at such a low point, seeing him revert back to his old accent and not being able to open up to anyone, knowing how that isolation feels-? Fjord, buddy. Come ‘ere. Let me love you.

Yasha: I have a hard time with Yasha because Ashley has been so absent. Her backstory really made me appreciate her, but the moment I would consider the one where she really got to me was when she shaved Caleb and they bonded. This big hulking woman, doing such a delicate task with a fucking broadsword? Her being so shy and timid with Caleb? Just. You precious angel. I love you.

Molly: “I’m going to sit over here and silently have a nervous breakdown over everything that happened.” I loved Molly from the moment Taliesin opened his mouth and mispronounced his own damn name. But knowing Molly could actually be bothered, be upset, be affected by things? That was where I really latched onto him. There was some depth to him that he’d expertly been keeping hidden, and I was so eager to see how what he would do when forced to face a world that demanded things from him that he didn’t want to give.

Caducues: Again, the moment Tal opened his mouth I was in love, but with many reservations. I struggled with Caduceus because I missed Molly. They are their own characters, distinctly so, but I wanted Molly back. I still want Molly back, in some ways. But I was eager to see what Taliesin was going to do with his new character, though I was admittedly not too thrilled with the idea of a firbolg. (I have since repented for that sin.) The moment that Caduceus really became a member of the M9 for me though, the moment I realized I was okay with him being there, was when he was almost left behind when the gang accidentally stole a pirate ship. I was so worried for Caducues, so worried about his safety, his health, his mental well-being. I realized I didn’t want to lose him, and was so relieved when he got on the boat. I was so glad he was okay, and it dawned on me that by desperately wanting him to stay, I had finally accepted him as a part of the group.

Not really sure why I said all this, other than just trying to fight off a bout of anxiety and thinking of the Mighty Nein is keeping my brain occupied. Also the formatting on mobile is wonky and stupid.

#critical role

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loquaciousquark · 6 years ago

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Talks Machina Highlights - Critical Role C2E42 (November 20, 2018)

Dani was actually goofing around quite a bit here, but this still makes me think of some glorious 90s band, so I’m keeping it.

Anyway! The inimitable @eponymous-rose has done more than her share of recaps lately, so here I am picking up where I’ve been slacking off. Tonight’s guests are Marisha Ray and Laura Bailey (with special guest appearance from Ronin! Awwww), so I can hardly wait. We’re discussing Episode 42: A Hole in the Plan.

Tonight’s announcements: Brian is bursting with an announcement he’s not allowed to reveal for another six months. His favorite guess: something about him stealing all the money from the company and moving to an island, but that’s actually his long game, not the short one.

Throughout November, they’re raising money for Operation Supply Drop, Travis’s favorite charity, which supports both active and retired military.

No episode of Critical Role this week due to Thanksgiving. There will also be no episode of Talks Machina next Tuesday; instead, they’ll be airing Sam’s Fireside Chat! This was a reward from the Critter donations to the Pablove Foundation.

Critical Role hoodies are back in the store; the print is very similar to the original with a bit more embellishment on the text on the back.

“Honey Heist 3: Tova’s Honies” airs this Friday at 7pm Pacific! Marisha: “It was bear-nanas.” Laura: “Oh, no.”

CR Stats: Jester has cast Blessing of the Trickster 31 times; 15 of those times were on Nott. Jester technically won her bar brawl with Sorris! She dealt 16 points of damage to his 15. Beau continues to have the most natural 20s with 49. She also has the most natural 1s, womp womp. Marisha: “Well, I roll a lot, you know?” Brian: “Well, your husband is also a tyrant and not to be messed with.” Marisha says she thinks Gil’s die is cursed and everyone gasps. How dare.

Does Brian feel the pressure of following Dani, who was such an excellent host last week? No; when he went through the potential list of fill-ins, the only one that made sense was Dani.

Marisha sees Darktow as a super-abusive socialist society, which does not sit well with Beau. It’s a silk trap.

Jester’s conversation with Caleb was triggered by Fjord’s kiss, especially with her wondering if it really meant anything to either of them. Laura thinks of her high school crushes and how hard you crushed & how devastated you were at every perceived slight; Jester only has the view of romance through her mother, which means physical affection is very different from emotional affection in her mind. On Brian’s asking, Laura’s high school crush was Han Solo. When Laura’s sister was 12, she paid her $15 to paint Han and Leia in a dip kiss, which she still has framed in her current house. I’m dying, this is adorable.

Beau doesn’t exactly trust that Fjord is going to do the right thing, but him sleeping with Avantika doesn’t trigger her red flags in terms of “looking out for each other, keeping each other in check.” She’s looking more for them bullying someone when they don’t need to, being violent when it’s not necessary. “Pursuing power to endless depths and fucking hot pirates, that’s fine with Beau. She just doesn’t want to kill children.” Brian marvels at how this fits into Jester & Caleb’s conversation about killing people from the most recent episode.

Jester can tell Caleb is tortured, and more than anything she wants people not to be sad around her. She just wants desperately for him to be happy.

Marisha has thought a ton about what Beau would have said if Jester had come to her first about the kiss, especially since it was Jester’s first kiss (Marisha assumes, and Jester answers in an adorably non-committal not-not-a-negative). Beau would have been game for it. She doesn’t know if Beau would have given good advice, but she would have tried her best.

Brian spills that Mary’s character’s CHA in their home game is 6. They discuss Nott’s score of 5 and enjoy themselves mightily at both of their expenses.

GIF of the Week! By @ropadoper, it’s Liam casting Reduce and then the Wall of Fire at the end of the episode, both of which involve Marisha falling out of her chair to the floor in reaction so that only her forehead is visible. Everyone is being so cute this episode I can hardly stand it.

As a reminder, an international shipping facility has been created in the UK. Laura asides to tell Travis the keys are in the diaper bag. Literally everyone is in the studio tonight except Sam, EVEN ASHLEY.

Jester thinks the Traveler always gives very good advice, but his suggestion to trick Fjord was the first time ever she felt a little hesitation to follow his advice. Brian: “Is that because he’s never been wrong or because she’s never been allowed to disagree?” Laura says it’s always been amazing advice so far, much more a best-friend relationship, but this was the first time she didn’t want to take his suggestion wholesale because she wasn’t sure it’s how she wanted to get Fjord to like her. Marisha really likes the dynamic of finding out your childhood best friend is a god.

Beau finds herself still being careful with her walls--Marisha imagines Beau was put in a lot of, like, pageant dresses as a kid--so when Jester commented on her hair and then laughed, she felt a little of that “wait, what, do you actually care? Do I look like shit?” Laura says she laughed, not Jester, because it was the most random thing to compliment Beau on.

Beau’s haircut came into being because it was cool & because Marisha wishes she were brave enough to try an undercut.

Brian’s convinced Fjord’s got gills. Dani: “What do you think Fjord is?” Brian: “Obviously a water man. Water genasi. What are water genasi?”

Beau wasn’t surprised Allison rejected her; she’s used to it. Ack. She was looking for an ally against Avantika, Big Brother style. “Instead she just shat in an alleyway with Nott.”

Laura’s not perturbed the Traveler hasn’t mentioned Fjord’s god; he doesn’t really talk about/care about other gods or patrons. Brian suggests he’s actually the Dongfather in disguise. This show’s collective mental age is smaller than Pike, haha.

Beau felt like such an interloper when Sam asked her to help with Fluffernutter, like the best friend trying to be in on a joke without really knowing what’s going on. Marisha also takes a moment to praise Laura for her Jester over the last few episodes; she’s digging into the metaphorical popcorn every time Jester & Nott start going off. (Me too, bud.) Jester’s description of the insect carrying a piece of bread is one of her favorite D&D moments ever. Both Marisha & Laura are agog at how many little plans they’ve tried have gone disastrous and then circled back around to being mostly okay again.

Beau was a little hurt when she wasn’t asked to help break into the captain’s quarters, since that’s her specialty, but it was eased by being able to help with her knowledge anyway. However, she knew since she didn’t have any magic, she had no escape plan aside from jumping off the boat. She laughs that that’s what they ended up doing anyway.

Jester views sex as a transaction, which is why she’s not particularly bothered by Fjord sleeping with Avantika.

Fanart of the Week: @jdillustrates, with a lovely portrait of Caduceus.

Jester’s warring between the logical part of her brain (he was saving her life) and the romantic part of her brain (did he want to kiss me, though?).

There are reasons Beau learned Deep Speech--not as complicated as most people think--that will be revealed eventually. “Nerdy reasons, not because she was kidnapped and turned into a cultist.”

Fjord/Avantika does make her jealous, but it’s also serving a purpose. Laura compares it to telling the high school crush to go hang out with a best friend, only to have them start dating.

Marisha doesn’t feel like Beau’s plans were overly shot down this episode--it’s something she hadn’t even noticed until this question. Marisha feels like it’s so much of a group effort with everyone trying to get to the right plan that it’s hard to pick out who contributed what part of which plan.

Brief interlude to examine a portrait of Brian that looks like George Michael.

In re: the Molly disguise: Beau felt like there was just a wall of regret walking towards her, because it was the friend she let die and the one-night stand. Beau never felt it was actually Molly, though. Jester picked Molly because when Nott said “Keg,” she instantly associated it with “someone who is really cool--who’s also super cool?” Everyone commiserates over how into the night’s shenanigans Molly would have been.

Beau was frustrated while being detained, but she also knew it was going to happen, so it wasn’t a huge issue. She felt like that was where the challenge began for her--anything to get the guard away from what was going on.

Another brief interlude where everyone experiments with how to make power vaginas with their hands. “This is the car salesman power vagina.” I feel like wherever the rails are for this show, they’re so far gone they might as well be little stars in the sky.

Laura thinks Jester’s reaction to Caleb’s backstory would be much different than Caleb imagines it. Both Laura & Marisha talk about how Caleb’s convinced the moment people realize, they’re gone; there’s also the complication that Beau’s “comforting” is not actually that comforting. “She’d say, ‘you know, they won’t care,’” (which Marisha points out, Caleb would respond--how could someone not care about this?) when what she means is, “They love you and won’t abandon you over this.”

Laura and Marisha are both pumped about Caleb’s Wall of Fire--the walk to the dock was like “getting called to the principal’s office, except the principal is going to kill you.” Laura’s immediate reaction was regret she’d tossed the gems, but she loved his decision since she was panicking IRL & her heart was legit pounding. They also both get super enthusiastic bashing Nott’s plan to dump the haversack in an alley. “It’s bright pink! Someone would have definitely seen it!”

Marisha really misses Professor Thaddeus, but is convinced she’ll never see him again. Dani: “He’s your Nymeria, your Arya.” Marisha, tearfully: “He’s gonna come with his flock of owls and gouge out everyone’s eyes but ours.”

Laura’s convinced Sprinkle is magic, since he definitely should be dead twice over.

Quebec is for Lovers: After Dark edition

Neither Laura nor Marisha are cooking this year. Laura & Travis have no Thanksgiving plans at all this year. My gosh, if they were here my parents would be stuffing them full of turkey yesterday, even though they have no idea who they are.

Brian teases Max over messing with Trinket & carrying him back and forth in his car. Dani wants one TM where Brian isn’t mean to Max. Max, offscreen: “I’m FINE. I’m GOOD.” Marisha laughs that Max was okay with Brian’s teasing but shooting daggers at the TDs laughing.

Brian gives Dani an A for amazing and adorable, but not asshole.

Dani ships Percy/Vex, Keyleth/Vax, and Fjord/Jester. Close after is Kima/Allura & Caleb/Jester. She would be surprised if it happened, but wouldn’t object. Marisha asks, as a shipper, what does Dani look for in a quality ship. Dani likes clear feelings with clear reciprocation, canon connections; she doesn’t ship a ton of subtexty stuff.

Laura has been relistening to Vex’s playlists & crying. Both she & Marisha really miss Vex & Keyleth. Liam texted Laura the other day a fanvid of Vex & Vax that made her cry.

Marisha gets emotional seeing fanart of older Keyleth because it means that she’s living on & being happy. Noelle also came up & thanked Marisha for giving Tova a purpose after the latest Honey Heist, and everyone talks about how many hours they’ve spent creating and living in these people.

Marisha can’t listen to Tokyo Sunrise by LP anymore because it instantly makes her cry.

Beau is not a mindflayer. Everyone’s convinced, Marisha.

If Laura had Jester’s paint set, she’d draw home improvements. She’d draw a door for her bathroom into Ronin’s nursery. Marisha would draw more producers--”Not to undermine the ones I have! We’re so overworked!”

Brian looks to Max for the time left, only to have missed Dani literally just giving him the signal.

Brian starts to say he’ll see us next week, but Dani tells him not to confuse us since there’s no TM next week. Brian: “We’ll see you next week this Thursday Critical Role on youtube.com, Logan Paul guest starring, along with Paul Rudd, Rudney Dangerfield...”

Max, as the sound fades: “Okay, please...”

And that’s it for tonight. See you next time, everyone!

#critical role #critical role spoilers #talks machina #talks machina spoilers #long post for ts

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princessamericachavez · 6 years ago

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The Fjorester Talk

ARE YOU GUYS READY FOR ME TO OVERANALYZE THE MOST BEAUTIFUL CONVERSATION IN THIS CAMPAIGN BECAUSE I SO AM LET’S DO THIS

Okay, first of all, I would like to thank Matthew Mercer for my life. He really went and gave me the exact scene setting I’d been daydreaming off ever since we talked about Fjorester/Tangled parallels.

Look at Travis’s face during that description. This is the face of a man who knows his moment to show his shipper colors has come

Honestly, Jester’s fascination with the beautiful jellyfish really hit me because she was just talking to Caduceus about how big the world is beyond his confinement and she too is experimenting all this for the first time and my heart can’t take it. She was so unusually quiet and contemplative at that moment.

And then Travis had to go and say “Yeah, they are beautiful” while looking at Jester like THAT. (Marisha knows what he’s doing. HE KNOWS WHAT HE’S DOING)

I can’t believe they really gave me this exact scene and then proceeded to keep killing me with feels as if this moment alone wasn’t enough.

SOMETIMES THINGS THAT ARE THE MOST BEAUTIFUL ARE THE THINGS THAT CAN HURT YOU THE WORST

this is gonna come back and haunt me at some angsty point in the future isn’t it????????????

Jester asking if Fjord is worried about the orb thing and being afraid that the captain will hurt him.

Like okay this is a consistent thing the one person who seems to be most worried over Fjord somehow being put in danger by his story and the one who’s always encouraging him to find answers and make sure he’s okay is always Jester. She’s so worried about him.

But Fjord is calm and confident and he has complete faith in what they can accomplish together.

“I feel like we take care of ourselves pretty well” totally felt like a throwback to when Jester was defining her relationship with Fjord to Nott back at the beginning and said “He watches out for me. I watch out for him. You know, we’re a good team.”

“I promise I’ll heal you if you start to hurt, okay?”

EXCUSE ME HOW DARE YOU TWO DO THIS TO ME? THOSE LITTLE SMILES. REMEMBER WHEN FJORD ASKED JESTER TO TELL HIM IF HE STARTED CHIPPING AT HIS TUSKS AND AFTER THEY AGREED THEY MADE THIS EXACT SAME FACES????

And then there’s that pause, and they could’ve totally stopped the conversation there but then Laura Bailey had to come for my heart with that soft way in which Jester finally asks: “Do you ever get sad?”

And I want to talk about that phrase.

Like. The sentence, the delivery, Laura’s face... it said so much about Jester.

I mean, Jester should know that everyone gets sad sometimes, but in her head Fjord is this strong and steady and fearless person who she puts her absolute trust on... so maybe he doesn’t get sad. Jester tries so hard to pretend that she’s never sad, maybe because she doesn’t know that others go through it too, that it’s completely okay to not feel happy and cheerful all the time.

The way she asks it is so desperate for confirmation like she’s scared like she really needs something to hold on to. There’s some heartbreaking yearning in her voice like she doesn’t want to feel alone anymore.

And when she further explains what she means “Sad that sometimes things don’t work out the way you were hoping?” you can see Fjord pause and process and realize that she’s talking about herself.

And Fjord who feels this enormous pressure to be a good leader, to present himself to the world in a certain way, who is so frustrated for the events that transpired a day ago... and who’s never lied to her, just nods and says “yes, sometimes”

“Are you sad, Jester?”

He says it so carefully, so softly, while looking at her as if he just discovered something. Because, to Fjord, Jester is unbreakable. Nothing gets her down, none of the horrors they’ve gone through or the fights or the pain.

When Fjord FINALLY asks this, he’s looking at Jester and maybe for the first time realizing how much she’s been carrying in her chest.

And, of course, because this is Jester we’re talking about, she tries to brush it off saying it passes quickly, she literally smiles through the tears as she says it.

I feel personally victimized by Laura Bailey

And then Fjord does this wonderful thing that I think is always part of healthy friendships and relationships: he doesn’t push to know what the problem is, instead he offers. It’s a give-and-take and he opens up before to be on equal ground.

I really think when he talked about the things he had that he doesn’t anymore Fjord was talking about losing his crew and Vandrin, who was clearly very important to him. We’ve rarely seen Fjord talk about this but survivor’s guilt clearly weights on him so much, it’s nice that he can open up a little bit more about it with her.

“What makes you sad, Jester?”

And, oh boy, when she talks about missing her mom and being sad that they had to leave so quickly... like dude, that whole clusterfuck started with Fjord falling into the water while pursuing his personal business... and if you don’t think he feels responsible for that shit you’re WRONG

“I... am sorry that we had to leave in the way we did.”

But “sorry” is not enough. We’ve seen that Fjord absolutely can’t handle Jester being upset and his default mode is “what can I do to fix this?” After the Gentleman reveal it was dealing with Algar to make her feel better about her mom’s safety. This time, you can see him formulating a plan: If Jester can go to Nicodranas, what if we can get her mom out of there?

“She thought about it one time, with my dad. She was planning to leave with him.”

I LOVE THAT FJORD ASKS WHAT JESTER WANTS FOR HER MOTHER BECAUSE HE ALWAYS DEFERS TO HER JUDGEMENT WHEN IT COMES TO HER HOME AND HER FAMILY AND RESPECTS HER WISHES AND THAT’S SO IMPORTANT TO ME

“I would like for her to be happy. I would like for him to love her.”

I’m gonna make a whole separate post about how Marion and the Gentleman’s relationship parallels Fjord and Jester

“I would like for her to not have to work anymore”

That’s like super interesting because, so far, she’s presented herself as someone who not only accepts but embraces her mother’s life as a normal one, a cool thing... but here for the first time we see hints of her perhaps not being entirely into it, maybe seeing the risks and the unsavory people she has to work for sometimes (like Algar or Lord Sharpe)

“That’s very noble of you” “I’m very noble” heartwarming words of affirmation.

“Well, how ‘bout...” SOMETHING ABOUT THE WAY FJORD SAYS THIS, COMPLETELY CHANGING THE MOOD BETWEEN THEM FROM A SAD CONVERSATION TO PARTNERS IN CRIME MAKING A PLAN JUST GETS TO ME

And of course, Fjord talks about the treasure islands and all these things that in D&D language means “we’ll collect a lot of loot” but what’s more important is that he cheers her up.

Jester spends 90% of her time trying to make people happy or make them laugh and brighten up and to see someone else do it for her when she most needs it kills me.

HE GETS HER TO SMILE.

Seriously, look at Matt’s face. Same, Matt. Same.

And of course, Fjord brings up again the “we take care of each other” because THAT’S THEIR THING. THAT’S WHAT THEY DO. THAT’S WHAT THEY ARE DOING RIGHT NOW.

And then Jester comes up with the crazy version of the plan to bribe the Gentleman into going back with her mother... but Fjord, bless him, is the romantic one this time, sure Marion can woo him herself.

And the way he says it.

He’s goofy, making faces and ‘sound effects’ and it’s so on-brand with Jester’s humor and what she needs right now.

“And she’s just...”