#later teachers that my siblings had just had kids do projects and research stuff

[vamptastic]

i also just don't understand the neurochemical theory for ADHD i guess. i mean, as far as i can tell, stimulants have genuinely helped me a lot, especially with sensory overload and being able to activate focus at will more often. but they haven't changed the core part of me that just goes too fast, if that makes sense. when i was a kid, most of the adults around me were convinced that (and it sounds fucking stupid, sorry, i promise i am not making this up) i was like... so smart that i had excess neurons that fired so much it caused literally every symptom of ADHD you can imagine. sensory overload was because i had like, heightened senses and took in too much data, talking fast and on a train of thought was because i just thought faster than other people, stuff like that. it's definitely a lot better than being told i'm stupid and defective (though i got a fair bit of that too, depending on the adult), but pretty obviously pseudoscientific and also the reason i didn't get diagnosed till age 16 despite the extremely obvious flags i was throwing up. regardless, that explanation that my brain was simply structured differently, that i basically took in too much data too fast, always spoke to me a lot more than the idea that it's caused by my dopamine receptors only. i just don't generally link most of my symptoms to my emotions or adrenaline levels most of the time. certainly it plays a part, but the way i talk, the sensory stuff, and the way i learn and process new information seems to be largely unexplainable with dopamine levels.

[that-darn-clown]

okay, sad ask now.

Henry and William's childhoods!! (plus how they met each other)

Henry:

grew up in a Very rural town in Utah (not Hurricane). like we're talking most people are farmers and there probably isn't more than 100-200 people living here. considering the time period (late 30's-early 40's), makes sense.

this poor guy's bio dad sucked. like he was horrible.

has an older sister named Jen :] (< canonical to the books, i'm sure)

he had only a few stuffed animals growing up: Teddy (bear, obviously), Theodore (rabbit), Dawn (chicken; technically a rooster but Henry didn't give a fuck), and Cooper (fox; fell apart often because it was the oldest of all the toys).

those lil guys would become his inspiration to make the OG Freddy's Gang.

he shipped Teddy and Theodore together, despite growing up heavily religious. he'd just check around to make sure no one was watching them and then he'd go "hehe now Kiss :3"

well. time for a bit of Projection. so like. Henry's Transmasc. now uh while doing some research because i remembered that there are some things that can cause facial hair (or "abnormal hair growth," as some sites call it where women grow hair on places where they either aren't supposed grow much/noticeable hair or any hair at all) in women. did some research, might have PCOS but with more...milder symptoms? idk because some of the symptoms/signs aren't things that i deal with personally. but the hair and the acne stuff matches up and we'll leave it there for now. but anyway, so there's that: Henry starting growing some facial hair (coincidentally a few months before realizing that. he May not be a girl, actually), and because he thought it was cool and because well he's already kind of a social outcast anyway so why not am i right? he decided to keep it.

dad got thrown in jail for fighting and almost killing someone in a bar fight, and his mom remarried. stepdad was much better :]

got his interest in mechanics and robotics from old sci-fi movies and having to fix stuff like his bike and some of the electricity and wiring in the house (mostly 'cause it Sucked).

time for college came around, and well...his stepdad knew some people who were willing to help with his transition as much as they could in like the 50's-60's. got his boy some top surgery, what technically would count as a "fake ID" (Henry and his stepdad would call it an "updated ID," though. which in a way they aren't wrong about), and then sent him off to college!

he 100% gives off the vibes of going down the "weird "girl" who later discovered they weren't a girl at all" to "goofy but Very autistic father" pipeline. i accept no criticism on this, he just Does.

yes he is a furry. Fredbear is in fact his fursona.

William:

hoo fucking BOY did this guy's parents SUCK.

like if you ever wonder why Rewrite!William's Like That as an adult, you've just got to look at his childhood.

his parents were distant and neglectful At Best, and physically + verbally abusive At Worst.

unfortunately for him, something that certainly didn't help matters was that He Was Autistic As Hell. sensory issues, couldn't understand social cues to save his life (still can't, tbh), and just in general was...odd.

some would've called him "eccentric," maybe. had an odd interest in rabbits, in drawing. he was always rather quiet, staring in an almost unnerving way at the walls or just on someone by accident. but mention anything he enjoyed, and he'd talk your ear off.

despite all of this, he was well-loved by teachers. charming lil guy, y'know? not exactly popular with most of the other kids, though...but effectively a Teacher's Pet, pretty much. not that he minded much, either; "If they can tell me something I haven't already heard from my parents, maybe I'll start listening." (< something that concerned the Fuck out of his art teacher once, fun fact!)

used to cry a lot as a kid; got him bullied often :(

parents were rich, and he had a lot of siblings (three sisters and two brothers; loved each other but acted rather distant :().

after a lot of begging from Will, on his 6th birthday, his parents got him a pet rabbit (mostly because they wanted him to shut the fuck up about it) that he named "O'Hare" (familiar sounding name, ain't it?).

and God, did that kid love that rabbit. took the best care of him he could. played with him with whatever spare time he had. he adored O'Hare.

of course...William never had the best luck as a child. when he was eight years old, a couple of friends of one of his older brothers had come over to hang out. they had found William drawing while talking to O'Hare, decided to mess around a bit, and...well, they were a bit too rough with the rabbit, we'll put it that way.

despite his brother getting rightfully pissed at those two for y'know. Killing His Brother's Pet Rabbit, even if it was technically an accident, and trying to comfort his brother, William is inconsolable.

of course, not that his parents understand that this isn't something William's just going to get over in a few days; they're just pissed off and annoyed that their son won't stop crying (to give an example, something his father said, "It's just a stupid rabbit, William! Now stop your whining and bitching!").

of course, William never really got over it that quickly. he practically closed himself off, escaping into doing art to ignore his grief and give himself something to distract himself. and he starts drawing his dead bunny as a new character: this time, as an actual hare. and anthropomorphic. look, William had been watching old Disney cartoons and Looney Tunes, also as a way of comforting himself. and maybe he got inspired a bit...maybe a way to immortalize his old rabbit. heck, who knows, maybe he could become an animator and rival Walt himself!

or, maybe, as he starts drawing and thinking more and more...a way to become his old rabbit? (< aka William is a furry. and a therian. maybe even ockin? well uh....if it works as a coping mechanism, then it works, i guess?)

at least...until his family discovered his sketchbook. and decided that the Best Course Of Action is to send their clearly grieving son to a BOARDING SCHOOL. when he was NINE.

and we ain't talking about a "teachers are kinda strict and you're expected to keep your grades up" boarding school. we're talking a "you will get your ass beat for something as small as accidentally dropping your PENCIL" boarding school.

because their other option is probably taking him to a psychiatrist and having to deal with the public humiliation that having an openly mentally ill family member at that time would cause (which gee guys, I WONDER WHOSE FAULT THAT IS?? I WONDER WHY YOUR SON HAS ISSUES??).

so they send him off, and uh. that goes as well as you'd expect: the letters are practically constant, talking about William's ever-worsening behavior problems. at first, he just clammed up and kept to himself, and anytime it came to corporal punishment, they mention that he hardly ever flinches. then...it got worse. he'd have breakdowns, usually at bedtime, and it would wake other students up. he'd get violent with bullies, not even caring for the consequences. he was always closed off, only ever happy during an art class. even stranger, despite the behavior problems...his grades never suffered. they don't understand it.

eventually, when he's fifteen, they send him home. they decided "yep. we're not dealing with him on the Teenager Hormones. he's Y'all's problem again." (< ignore that this is taking place in England)

his behavior problems? never get any better while he's still at home: his emotions are volatile now. he's sad? everyone in the damn house is gonna hear it from his bedroom. he's angry? hope no one was attached to that glass cup he was holding, because it's broken now.

the family just decides to move over to America (i'd say maybe either Virginia or NY. don't ask why, those are the vibes i'm getting), because i think they're starting to realize They Fucked Up Somewhere and decided maybe a change of scenery would help William. It Really Didn't, But They Tried.

when he turns 18, they just buy him a car, give him a bunch of money, and send him off into the world; "Go to college. Or don't. We don't really care what you do at this point, we just don't want you here."

he just scoffs and decides that he'll go away. far away for college, somewhere where his family isn't breathing down his neck and he can just be himself, and just try things out. see what sticks.

not really like he wants to stay here, anyway.

(this man is also Not cis. probably some flavor of nonbinary. or even some form of rabbit/hare xenogender, purely 'cause it would fit. he'd like it/its pronouns and neopronouns, i'd think)

and now, fucking finally:

College:

they both only really found out that they'd been assigned as roommates when Henry finally arrived at the room. it was. an awkward first couple of hours.

they found out that they had pretty similar schedules, and a lot of the same classes, and. Well, Ain't That Convenient!

William goes back to being his old eccentric self, a rather dramatic man. he and Henry both took a drama class, but for different reasons (William because he could just be himself and Henry so that he could come out of his shell a bit).

they both found out about each other's fursonas and expected the other to go "ew cringe" but. they both found it pretty cool! (it definitely made Will happy, considering he'd been called a weirdo for that his entire life)

then pretty shortly after that they looked at the fact that they both had some. creative ideas with those fursonas and other characters, and while William originally went with the "let's make an animated cartoon show! :D" (which, keep in mind, was his original childhood plan), Henry thought about the fact that they were both in some mechanics/robotics classes and went "actually, I have a better idea-" and that's how the idea for Freddy's/Fredbear's was originally born :]

Henry came out as trans to William and his (at the time) girlfriend, Claire, because he had decided to keep his flannel unbuttoned and Claire saw his top surgery scars. after a couple of minutes of nearly choking on water (because Henry literally decided to start his explanation with "Oh, these are from where I got my breasts cut off-" and it caught Will so off guard), William basically went "HOLY SHIT, THAT'S SO COOL????"

also, final fun fact: these two Have explored each other's bodies before. in college. it's how Henry discovered he was pan and how Will discovered he was bi. just a fun fact for you :]

and there we go!! finally done :] gotta go eat now see ya later bestie enjoy these

AAAHH being like "aw my poor bois :[" and then stumbling upon They Have Explored Each Other's Bodies is maybe the best experience of my life lmaooo. I really like them being early furries. The internet comes out and they join a furry chat room and are like "holy shit chat are you seeing this" (if they had just stayed normal and not. Ya know. Done murder by then)

But yeah ough. My sillies...

[zoekravitz88]

The interview for The Style: Sitting opposite Zoë Kravitz is like looking directly into the sun. On set in Paris, the 29-year-old model-actress-singer is in full promo mode, rattling through all the beautiful products she likes to use on her beautiful face: YSL Beauté Couture Brow on her eyebrows, YSL highlighter over her cheekbones, YSL Touche Eclat around her eyes, though nothing on the cluster of freckles over her nose, which look as if they have been hand-painted by tiny elves. Was there ever going to be another genetic outcome for the only child of Lisa Bonet and Lenny Kravitz, one of the most absurdly good-looking couples of the late 1980s? For a few bright, shining years, they rolled around town dressed up like a pair of fabulous vagabond art teachers: Lenny with his soul patch and polonecks, Lisa in her top hats and micro-sunglasses. In 1987, when they eloped to Las Vegas on Lisa’s 20th birthday, Lenny was still a struggling musician known professionally as Romeo Blue (then later, unofficially, as “Lenny the Loin”), but Lisa was one of the most famous women on the planet, thanks to her role as Denise Huxtable in The Cosby Show. “I guess my mom taught me how to use make-up,” Kravitz says in her surfer-bro drawl. “She wears very light make-up — she would teach me stuff.” She doesn’t flinch when asked about her parents for possibly the thousandth time in her career. In fact, in person she is pretty much exactly what you’d expect if you put Lisa Bonet and Lenny Kravitz in a blender: half bohemian Californian wood nymph, half sassy showman. Kravitz has been acting since her late teens, nailing the box-office hits (X-Men, the Divergent series, Mad Max, Fantastic Beasts), picking some good indies (the critically acclaimed Dope), and most recently starring in the A-list foie gras that was Big Little Lies on HBO. And ever since accompanying her dad on the odd front row as a teenager, it’s the fashion world that has been obsessed with her. She has been signed up for ad campaigns for Coach, Calvin Klein, Alexander Wang and Tiffany, and now she is an ambassador for YSL Beauté. She gets the rigmarole of it all (conversation veers between make-up tips and the benefits of a Trump news diet), but she is engaged and articulate. Minus the occasional slip into LA therapy speak (a lot of talk later about “energy” and “community”). To be fair, she grew up in the patchouli-scented enclave of Venice Beach, before moving to Miami to live with Lenny at the age of 11. Her parents split up when she was two. “It was kind of hard having to go, you know, months without seeing one parent. I actually think it would have been great to be in a situation where you can see someone at the weekend,” she shrugs. “But the grass is always greener, I guess.” Ah yes, the Lenny the Loin years. For a time, there was a revolving door of A-list girlfriends — Vanessa Paradis, Natalie Imbruglia and Kylie Minogue, and brief engagements to Nicole Kidman and Adriana Lima. But there’s no squirming or glibness about it from Kravitz. She is cheerfully self-aware of her parents’ colourful pasts. When a TV host asked what it was like to be reunited with almost-stepmom Kidman on Big Little Lies (“She was always so, so nice to me — I hadn’t seen her since I was 13”), she whooped with delight at the presenter’s suggestion that her father was the perfect rebound after a marriage to Tom Cruise. She has even had a laugh about #penisgate — that moment in an otherwise uneventful (probably?) summer in 2015 when Lenny ruptured his tight-tight leather trousers on stage in Stockholm and momentarily broke the internet. Kravitz uploaded a screenshot to Instagram of a conversation with rocker Steven Tyler’s daughter, Chelsea, and a withering monkey-covering-its-face emoji. Father and daughter are clearly very close: she joined Lenny on tour for a year when she was 13, which sounds like a unique experience for a teenage girl, I say. “It was definitely an experience. I was the only kid [on tour], so, um, being surrounded by nothing but adults as a kid is always kind of a bizarre thing.” In Miami, she attended a top private school, where she was one of the only black girls in her class. She rattles off the memory: “It was pretty hard for me just because, you know, I wasn’t comfortable in my own skin, and I hadn’t found like-minded people, so I felt like a freak.” Meanwhile, the house had drop-in guests including Stevie Wonder, Mick Jagger, Tyler and her godmother, the actress Marisa Tomei. Kravitz and I meet in January, a few weeks after the Golden Globes, when the first wave of Time’s Up activism has kicked into gear. She signed her name on the official petition and wore black in solidarity (strapless Saint Laurent). The elephant in the room is that the projects she will be promoting this autumn both have some pretty clanging #MeToo moments, as both Johnny Depp, her co-star in Fantastic Beasts: The Crimes of Grindelwald, and James Franco, who stars in the indie sci-fi thriller Kin, have faced criticism. How does all this sit with her? Does she feel the need to research people before she says yes to things now? “Of course, but that has always been the case. Now it’s different because we have more information. Like, I didn’t know about A, B and C before, and now I do.” She stops to think. “But I do believe in second chances, depending on who it is — obviously someone like Harvey, no, never again — but you know, there are people who make mistakes and, not that it’s excusable, I don’t want to feel like there’s a separation between men and women.” She sighs. “I don’t know, man, like, I hope that no one is wrongly accused, but a rich white man in America being wrongly accused, welcome to the club. You know how many black and Latino people are wrongly accused and put in jail all the f****** time? So,” she gives a bitter laugh, “that’s life.” Speaking of proper, non-famous life: she has spoken candidly before about her teenage struggles with anorexia and bulimia that lasted well into her twenties. Where is she at now? “I went to therapists, I took all kinds of stuff, but what really made me stop was just being tired of being sick and having this secret, and all of that. It’s exhausting, that need for control or going to throw up, and I felt it in my body.” What does recovery look like for her now? “I definitely still have moments of, ‘Oh my God, I look fat, I gained 4lb.’ I do that to myself and it’s so stressful…” She trails off. “The struggle continues for me. It’s not like I’m completely cured and never think about my weight at all. It’s just about perspective, it’s, like, I want to be happy. Being thin doesn’t make me happy, being hungry doesn’t make me happy, compulsively checking my weight doesn’t make me happy.” So, what does make her happy? “My friends, my family, food makes me happy, that’s the thing, I love cooking so much,” she laughs. “I’m not an organised cook. I have no idea what I’m doing and it’s a mess. My dad was saying the other day, ‘You don’t know what you’re doing, but you put love into the food, and you can tell.’ ” Her parents seem to have nailed the Gwyneth-and-Chris model of post-divorce equanimity: Lenny still describes his ex-wife as his “best friend”. Lisa has been with Game of Thrones actor Jason Momoa since 2007, with whom she has two children. They’re all one big, blended family, appearing on red carpets together and sharing family selfies on Instagram — Lisa and Lenny attended the Met Ball together in 2015. Zoe and Momoa even have matching tattoos, and she named her band, Lolawolf, after her two half-siblings. She now lives with her boyfriend of 18 months, the actor Karl Glusman, who was in Tom Ford’s Nocturnal Animals. Is it the first time she has moved in with a boyfriend? “It’s not. It’s the second time,” she giggles. “It didn’t work out the first time, so…” (That would be with Penn Badgley from Gossip Girl.) “But it’s great.” The couple live in Brooklyn, of course, and hang out with a group of fellow Very Cool Indie Types — Alia Shawkat of Arrested Development/Search Party fame and Ilana Glazer of Broad City are two of Kravitz’s best friends. Filming on Big Little Lies will continue through summer, then she is “leaving things open” after the show. She reclines on the sofa on set and gets going on another good speech: “The whole idea of celebrity is bizarre, but I think what it can do is remind people they’re not alone in the world. You know, being alive is scary, so I just want to be a reflection of another being out there, figuring it out too.” Zoë Kravitz is the make-up face of YSL Beauté

[sfpcschool]

Interview with Computing and Stories Summit presenters

SFPC is hosting the first Computing and Stories Summit on June 1st, 2017. Here's an interview with the organizers and presenters: Amy Wibowo, Jie Qi, Jenna Register, Natalie Freed, Linda Liukas and Taeyoon Choi.

Tell us a little about yourself, how did your interest in computing begin?

Jenna: Little was it known to me that I have been a computer programmer since a very young age. I fell in love with problems like the Towers of Hanoi, Mastermind, and logic puzzles. I found my way into “hacking” my computer games to cheat in some outrageous ways. I even read an entire book on recursion and math… without ever knowing what Computer Science was. When I was required to take my first CS course in college as part of my Brain and Cognitive Sciences degree, I fell in love. I switched everything that I was doing just so I could code. Just so I could finally feel understood by myself. For me, programming is the source of my spirituality. I understand myself through my code!

Taeyoon: As a kid, I was fascinated by computers. I think the first computer I encountered was Macintosh Plus. It had a chatbot that I could interact with. The conversation itself was limited but I liked the idea that I could engage with a computer intimately. I was really into the Internet community as a youth, connecting people over distance. I learned to use digital production tools (mostly photo and video editing) in an art school. I often felt limited by the commercial production tools, I felt like my expression was constrained in the filters and features of the tools. In the mid 2000s, I learned about hackers and new media artists working with software and hardware in playful ways. During my residency at Eyebeam in 2008, I met many friends (Zach Lieberman who I continue to work with on SFPC, the openFrameworks community, Hannah Perner-Wilson, Dan Torop, Geraldine Juárez and more) and their practice demonstrated that I can take liberty to use computers and electronics for creative expression.

Shift Register by Taeyoon Choi, photo courtesy of the artist

Linda: My dad brought home a computer in early 90s and told us there’s nothing we can do with the computer that can’t be reversed. As a result, me and my siblings had a very curious and fearless attitude towards computers and computing - and probably also managed to remove the operating system and dad’s important work files a few times.. I never thought my career would be in technology, but now in hindsight working with education & computing connect all the dots for me.

Natalie: When I was a kid my dad brought home a couple of old Macintoshes for us to play with. My siblings and I spent hours upon hours drawing in Kid Pix. I still love that program, and its great origin story! I also used my computer to make maps and write short stories. I had no clue what computer programming was until my dad, a programmer himself, encouraged me to take a C++ class in high school. I was very unhappy in that class - it was mostly boys and as a shy kid who liked to blend in, I felt out of place. I also wasn’t super interested in the class project of making a computer game. Fortunately I gave programming another shot in college and fell in love, ending up majoring in computer science. It’s magical that you can create things with words and with the logic of language! And the kinds of abstraction you can play with make my brain really happy. Now I teach programming, and also use it as a creative tool to explore concepts and to build tools for making other things.

Stab Bound Books, by Natalie Freed. Photo courtesy of the artist

Amy: As a kid, I loved drawing in MS paint, creating 3D worlds in Corel 3D, making games in Visual Basic, and making Sailor Moon fan websites in HTML in Notepad. I loved making stuff outside of the computer as well (painting, cross stitch, embroidery), so computers and programming to me seemed like just another way to express my creativity.

Jie: I took my first programming course in high school (AP computer science) and did so poorly I ended up dropping the course halfway and thought that programming is *definitely* not for me (other people in the course seemed to glide through and were winning state competitions!). However, in college, I did an internship with Ayah Bdeir and got into electronics and another internship with Leah Buechley and discovered that code could be combined with arts and crafts to bring artworks to life. That’s when I finally “got it” and fell in love with the magical things I could make with programming and electronics.

Picture from Jie Qi’s project “Electronic Popables”, photo courtesy of Jie Qi

What are the creative challenges you are currently encountering in your practice?

Taeyoon: I find it important to connect my work with the history of art, and technology often gets in the way. I find it a challenge to make art that’s timeless as well as current and relevant. There’s often lots of excitement about what is ‘new’ in technology. For example, recently there’s a lot of excitement about A.I. and VR. A few years ago, there was a lot of excitement about 3D printing. And some time ago, there was a lot of excitement about interactivity. But there’s a sense of futility in these short-lived excitement. When I see people wearing VR headsets, I often think of Kasier Panorama. Kaiser panorama is a mechanical contraption where you look into the viewfinder to see a moving diorama, a miniature of Paris or Berlin. It was popular around the turn of the 19th century, lost popularity over the years and then came back to popularity for a brief period right before silent film became mainstream. In a sense, the ‘new’ technologies tend to repeat the excitement and exhaustion, like Kasier Panorama. For me, technology is both the medium and subject of my art.

Jenna: In order to be creative in my research field, I need to have the hard skills. I can dream up Turing Complete systems for monkeys to use, or functional programming languages that model the human mind… but I need to be able to successfully (and mathematically) write my models. Additionally, I am finding it harder and harder to communicate the work that I do to outside ears. I love sharing the basics of my work, but when it comes to explaining my current interests in a concise way, it requires A LOT of creativity to explain the abstraction.

Data Structures: STACKS, video by Jenna Register

Linda: I think kids are the most efficient learners of all times and it requires a lot of honesty to write and illustrate for them. I don’t want to make things cartoonish or use narratives that they will feel dishonest later in life. At the same time I think it’s important to shield a bit of the complexities to make subjects approachable.

Natalie: I’ve always admired and enjoyed spending time around artists, but didn’t think of myself as one. I’ve recently been realizing that for some of my projects, it would be incredibly useful to learn more about how artists evaluate their own work and think about their process. It feels like there are lenses through which to look at making that are not in my current toolkit. This is actually an exciting realization because I like that feeling of disorientation when you’re learning about something really new to you. One example is that I’m used to a prototyping process that is *relatively* linear and predictable, not one that involves throwing out 90% of what I try! And as a teacher and maker I value process a lot, but I’m not used to thinking that it’s allowed to be integral to the final piece.

Video of “Telescrapbook”, by Jie Qi and Natalie Freed

Jie: The most challenging for me is simply finding the time to explore far far outside of my domain. Lately I’ve been working a lot on toolkits and teaching and explaining-- which is fun and satisfying. But I’m also excited to explore and push my own technical and creative boundaries as well, and miss this different kind of joy. So perhaps giving myself permission and time to really play is my biggest creative challenge right now.

Amy: It's a fun and exciting creative challenge to explain concepts like machine learning, compilers, and operating systems in a way that middle schoolers will find interesting and accessible, in a way that's not condescending or dumbed down. Also, how to build a company that does social good and is ethical, in a monetarily sustainable way.

Why is it important to make computer science and engineering a more welcoming and diverse field?

Taeyoon: The mainstream culture of computer science and engineering is exclusionary. There’s a stereotypes of (typically white men) leaders in the field. In fact, it’s not true. Traditionally, women and queer engineers have pioneered many important aspects of computing and technology. Also, the real workforce and academics who are developing computing, are not homogenous. I think a lot about ways of revealing the complexities of the cultural bias around technology. If we can create counter-narrative to the mainstream image (of white or male – artists / engineers / entrepreneurs) , we can help shape a culture around technology that’s less biased and unfair, ultimately more inclusive for people who are not represented as leaders in the field.

Jenna: I recently returned from a conference where there were 300 women out of 8000 attendees. That is 3.75% female (unsure about Trans individuals). The conference was for GPUs, so very close to hardware (less women the closer to the hardware you get!). But it was a shocking experience. But besides an obvious inequality like this, here is my answer: Problem Solving is Empowering. I find that learning to think logically, and gaining the independent thinking that comes along with programming is empowering. And I want to help those who feel disempowered to find their strengths through STEM.

Excerpt from “How Do Calculators Even” by Amy Wibowo

Linda: I’m writing the book series thinking of what would have made me excited about computing as a kid. A lot of the materials out there today lack this empathy - and that’s why it’s important to have more diversity in the educational field, also going forward.

Natalie: Based on my own experience, my students’ experiences, and my research, I am convinced that many people who would really enjoy computer science miss out on the chance to learn about it. They might get initially turned off by an unwelcoming experience, only get exposure to a narrow application of it that doesn’t match their interests, or leave because of a toxic learning or work environment. I’ve found so much joy and empowerment in this field, and I deeply believe others should have that opportunity as well. Also, technological change has an enormous impact on society. We need all kinds of people deciding what direction that takes.

Art and Algorithms exercise from Linda Liukas’ “Hello Ruby”, photo courtesy of the artist

Jie: Computer science and engineering are such powerful levers to impact and (hopefully!) improve the world. However, change is rarely about just the technology but rather needs a whole community around it to make sure that the technology itself makes sense and is accessible. Unless we bring more diverse perspectives into the field, people who feel welcome and empathize with problems and see solutions that actually work for *their* community -- ones that the current tech community does not sense-- we cannot see the full extent of how much positive change we can create.

Who are your role model? Tell us about people you look up and feel constantly inspired by?

Linda: I love Sophia Coppola, Tove Jansson and Björk, artists with a strong inner world that they’ve projected consistently, but creatively throughout the years.

Taeyoon: I look up to people who take their work seriously and take on a very long term projects. Recently, I invited Barbara London, who was a curator at MoMA for decades, bringing new media art, video art and sound art, into the museum. Her persistence was admirable. I also think about artists and activists who embed themselves in communities and institutions. There are many, I can’t think of one person right now.

Barbara London, photo courtesy of the Grolsch ArtBoom Festival

Jie: There are so many. But for the most part, I really admire who are both amazing through what they do and maintain a kindness, humility and generosity that invites everyone in. To name a few, Ayah Bdeir (founder and CEO of littleBits) is my entrepreneur role model-- for growing something from bits in a shoebox to an entire movement, fueled by her unique faith and energy. Leah Buechley and Edith Ackermann are my research role models and taught me how to contribute academic research without getting caught up in the machinery. Andrew “bunnie” Huang who has taught me so much about navigating freedom. Finally Sally Rosenthal who has a magical knack for making things happen with firmness, warmth and empathy.

Natalie: So many it’s hard to begin, but Edith Ackermann comes strongly to mind. She was incredibly rigorous about studying play without ever losing her own sense of humor, play, and mischief. She could see the “soul” of your project and would tell you about it, bluntly but somehow in the most warm and inspiring way imaginable. Also, my mom read us Claude Ponti books growing up and his surreal, detailed worlds full of imagined creatures have stuck with me.

“Imagination” from Linda Liukas’ “Hello Ruby”

Jenna: Quite frankly (nobody make fun of me!): All of you! I am so thrilled to get to meet you all. I have not yet come across others who want to inspire through art, technology, fun, and childlike wonder. I couldn’t be happier.

Amy: Simone Giertz is my hero for bringing a sense of fun and play to technology, and for emphasizing that it's ok to build things that are useless. Also, just like Jenna said, all of you! I’m honored to be with so many people whose work I admire!

Data Structures: Hash Tables, video by Jenna Register

What was the last project (art, comic, technology or whatever) you saw that blew your mind?

Taeyoon: I went to the Frieze Art Fair in NYC and saw some great things. I really liked slow moving sculptures by Robert Breer and Andreas Angelidakis’s video art ‘Domesticated Mountain’. I also read a story by a South Korean novelist Han Kang, which I thought was very moving. I’ve been reading Beasts of Burden by Sunaura Taylor, which is an incredible book about disability and animal rights.

Jie: There’s a short story by Nathaniel Hawthorne called “The Artist of the Beautiful” about a young watchmaker that makes magical machines in his workshop. The (very emotional) creative process really resonated with me.

Natalie: At the last Autodesk Pier 9 showcase, I ran across Neil Mendoza’s “Fish Hammer Actuation Device.” A camera over a fish tank tracked a goldfish’s movements, which were then transmitted to a hammer moving on a circular track. When the goldfish stayed in the same place for long enough, the hammer would come down and, depending on its position, might smash a tiny piece of furniture placed in its path. I was so delighted by this piece. Something about how completely oblivious the fish was to the destruction it was causing!

Linda: I’m reading Robert Irwin’s Seeing is Forgetting the Name of the Thing One Sees and it's helped me understand and navigate a good part of this year.

“Hello Ruby” Skidit Festarit, photo by Otso Kaijaluoto

Jenna: My very best friend is working on a comic to help herself and others overcome their PTSD. The comic is a superhero world, where your “inner demons” manifest in the outside world. We illustrate people as superheroes fighting off demons like Insecurity, Depression, etc. We hope to make illustrations for people who are working through healing, to remind Survivors that they are, in fact, Warriors.

Amy: When the SFMOMA reopened recently, I was blown away by a wall mural designed by Sol Lewitt. As a conceptual artist, he didn’t paint the mural but instead, contributed instructions for how to paint it, which were written in a way that reminded me of Logo Turtle programming. Algorithms as art!

Electrocutie Hardware Kit by Amy Wibowo

* We are thankful to our sponsors including SFPC, Hello Ruby, The Frank-Ratchye STUDIO for Creative Inquiry, Paul Ford and Processing Foundation. We are actively looking for sponsors. Please contact taeyoon@sfpc.io if you are interested in supporting this event. 

[gupdoo3]

Alright so I’m FINALLY doing a write-up about my second major group of OCs

some background: once upon a time my friend @voteplant2040/@popelickva was doing a livestream of him trying to figure out a TF2 Newgrounds dating sim and someone in the chat (I believe it was @milesdafoo) said something to the effect of “I’d have more fun playing a dating sim where you dated a golf ball and a golf club”. I looked at that, said “challenge accepted”, and hashed out a few characters. I don’t know if I’ll ever turn this into an actual game because that’s hard work, but at the very least I’m proud of myself for having come up with somewhat interesting characters based on such a weird prompt. (Note: Technically Miles came up with two of these characters. Well, it was originally one character, but then it became two characters who share a hive mind because of weird sci-fi bullcrap. But I’m not telling which ones they are.)

Disclaimer: these characters haven’t been bouncing around in my head for a very long time, so they’re not as developed as I’d like, but here they are nonetheless.

(note: all Japanese names are in surname given name order)

Hajikano Masumi (gender and pronouns decided by the player, 17, japanese) is the (canonically autistic) protagonist with a vested interest in science and not a lot of social graces who occasionally forgets things like “eating”, “sleeping”, and “showering”. During the game they have the option to become an intern at the research wing of Iwadate Industries. They used to be really engaged in anime, manga, and visual novels, but that phase is mostly passed. Their way of calming down is to play golf, which is how they meet...

The Baishō siblings are the two love interest of this hypothetical game. They  serve as a deconstruction of the Stereotypical Anime Personification Of Inanimate Objects Who Are Also Your Love Interests, because, dude, what do you do with two humans who have spontaneously popped into existence, have no knowledge of the outside world, and don’t legally exist? And isn’t the concept of being an object and then suddenly becoming a sentient being a bit horrifying? (And as such, even if they act like they have it all together, they’re both scared of the new world they find themselves in and saddened because they don’t see themselves as truly human.)

(note: I’m not trying to do any faux-deep navel-gazing “i read an intro to psychology/philosophy textbook” type stuff, i just don’t want my hypothetical video game to be the same cliche drivel as everything else that stars personified anything.)

They came to life one day while Masumi was playing golf and later enrolled at his school under false names.

Baishō Kyō (gender and pronouns decided by the player, 17, japanese) is an innocent, naïve, wide-eyed idealist. They’re the golf ball. Kyo is short, stout, and albino, and those last two things make them a bit self concious about their appearance (once they learns that most people consider those things flaws).

Baishō Michi (gender and pronouns decided by the player, 17, japanese) is quiet, aloof, and calculating. They’re the golf club. No-one knows what they’re thinking.

Maruo Ryuta (male, 17, japanese) is Masumi’s hot-blooded, somewhat ditzy, nerdy best friend. Despite his nerdiness he’s definitely not the brains of the bunch; his flavor of nerdiness is more along the lines of visual novels (and the occasional English-language adventure game). 100% probability of giving too many fucks about any minor inconvenience. Has always wanted the chance to shout “OBJECTION!”

Monty and Molly Forrester (male/female respectively, 12, canadian) are two of Masumi’s next door neighbors. Their mom works as an engineer at Iwadate Industries as part of the Exercise project (essentially it’s an endeavor to make a robot who can play sports) and their dad is Masumi’s science teacher. Monty is a weird nerd kid (who eventually ends up bonding with Ryuta over their shared love of Monkey Island) and Molly is an outgoing girly girl. (I know which other twins these two might remind you of please don’t bother pointing it out)

Isoarashi Lydia (female, 11, canadian-born japanese) is Molly’s precocious best friend. She’s extremely stoic and laconic-- until you get her talking about Sherlock Holmes. Since she’s a little bit weird (and a whole year younger than her classmates), she had trouble making friends when her family moved to japan until she met Molly. The two initially bonded over being Canadian, but they quickly started partaking in each other’s interests. She’s a lesbian with a crush on Molly, and later on the two share a bit of a puppy love.

Dr. Scott Calvin (male, late 20s, british) is a computer scientist who works at Iwadate Industries on the Exercise project (but I’m not sure if computer science is what his phd is in?). He’s one of the youngest researchers on the team and certainly the youngest one with a PhD (he’s pretty much directly out of grad school; though he’s been working at Iwadate in some capacity since before he got his PhD). Although he’s not intended to be an example of “young wunderkid immediately beats all the seasoned adults at their own game” he’s certainly proven himself worthy of his position depsite his age. He’s pretty much always frustrated/disgruntled in some capacity, though his is a more subdued frustration than Ryuta’s (or, to quote John Mulaney “Adult life is already so goddamn weird, this might as well happen”). Will talk for hours about computers. He’s named after both Tom Scott and Marty McFly’s alter-ego “Calvin Klein”.

Dr. Bulan “Becky” Buanaputri (female, 30, indonesian) is Masmui’s step-aunt (ie his mom’s stepsister) and a kinesiologist who works on the Exercise project (her job partially consists of analyzing movement data from human test subjects but her exact duties are very hush-hush). Born in Indonesia, but her family moved to America when she was a kid. Went by Becky as a kid to avoid jokes about how much Bulan sounds like Mulan, and the name stuck. She’s very cheerful and loves cats. Never seen without a bag of microwave popcorn that she’s eating from, and she also has a bit of a sweet tooth.

Fritz Möller (male, late 20s, german-swiss) actually started out as an Ace Attorney OC in a fanfic which I started writing but don’t know if I’ll ever return to. Fritz is a meteorologist who works at the research wing of Iwadate in some capacity, and he trains dogs in his spare time. He’s involved with the mysterious Sector 22 project. Drunk a lot (obviously not part of his AA characterization). Usually not drunk at work. He’s best friends with Scott-- they were dormmates together and shared an apartment for a while. He now lives in a house with his grandmother (in light of her husband’s passing), right next door to Masumi.

Toshiyuki Harvard (male, late 20s, japanese-british) and “Hatch” (male, 30s, german-american) are two childhood friends of Fritz. Toshiyuki is introverted, stoic, and no-nonsense, while Hatch is generally more upbeat, and a bit of a klutz. These characters don’t get as much screentime as most of the others so I haven’t fleshed them out very much LOL

Agari Shirō (male, 60s, japanese) is Masumi and Ryuta’s homeroom/P.E. teacher. He looks like he could probably bench-press you, but is actually a jolly, amicable man. Is gay.

Exercise (???) is a robot being developed by Iwadate Industries but he might be gaining sentience DUN DUN DUUUUUUN

[airoasis]

Security, Positive Behavior Support, and Intrinsic Motivation-- Ryan Boren

The video itself is only two and a half minutes, but the way they efficiently pack in so much of what is wrong in schooling today is remarkable. To put it bluntly, it was a bunch of behaviorist garbage. It makes the argument that students are animals that need to be conditioned to do what is expected of them through punishments and rewards. This is music to many educators’ ears, because they all know from their teacher training that the foremost priority in school is classroom management. And when classroom management is taken care of, then they can focus on what really matters-test scores.

The punishments and rewards continue to compound on themselves. Chris gets to go to the pep rally later in the day where he can let loose and have fun. Chris is a good boy, and gets to do good boy things. Jill, however, is a bad girl, so she must go to detention instead of going to the pep rally. Perhaps making Jill sit in a room by herself while everyone else is having fun will teach her to ‘act right.’

Hero K12 reaffirms everything that is perceived to be right with Chris, and everything that is perceived to be wrong with Jill. However, what if Jill had a good excuse for being late? Like she needed to take care of a sibling in the morning because of a family emergency? Or what if she works a part-time job in the evening and is not getting enough sleep? It does not matter in the world of Hero K12, though, because only zeroes fail to show up on time.

But when we assume that data points to behavior, and that points to the means to control behavior, we become authorized to create methods, approaches, and technologies that fulfill that promise. I offer as exhibit A this promotional video for Hero K12 a student monitoring system that gathers data from student behavior in on-ground learning environments (aka, the augmented reality LMS).

I’ve shared this video out on Twitter (with a nod to Audrey Watters, who originally shared it here), and the overall response was one of horror. My network was concerned about this level of monitoring, about the reduction of students to data, about the fact that Jill’s home or family situation, her access to transportation, nor any other factor outside of her name and grade level are considered by the Hero K12 human management system. For myself, I am most concerned about the inability of students to fully understand and to resist or change the system. While I have no doubts students are capable of breaking the system, or making it work for them, Hero K12 represents a determinant, one which students must adapt to, one which requires a surrender of their agency. They become their data, and while they may find ways to feed certain data into the system, they have no power to resist their own reduction to numbers, patterns, and statistics.

The LMS threatens the same reduction of human complexity to simple data. I say “simple” because even when data is nuanced and complex, it fails to be an accurate representation of a human being. This is not to say data cannot indicate certain behaviors, nor that it is useless, only that it has limitations. But it is not those limitations that are advertised, not those limitations that we’re trained to observe; instead, we are encouraged to see data as descriptive, not just indicative. And when that happens, a surfeit of data erects a barrier between students, teachers, and administrators. But most importantly, and least spoken about, data as a determinant erects a barrier between a student and themselves.

ABOUT FIVE YEARS AGO, a cluster of new technologies began to migrate through the nation’s schools like a gaggle of fall geese. Schools have long devised policies and procedures to manage and shape students’ behavior. Sticker charts. Detentions. Referrals. Rewards. Educators routinely point to classroom management as one of the most important skills of being a great teacher, and new teachers in particular are likely to say this is one of their most significant challenges. These novel apps, bearing names like ClassDojo and Hero K12, promised to help by collecting students’ behavioral data and encouraging teachers to project the stats onto their classroom’s interactive whiteboard in order to keep students “on task.” It is, they claim, all part of a push to create a “positive classroom culture.”

Skinner’s theories have fallen out of favor in some education circles. Noam Chomsky, for one, wrote of Skinner’s behaviorism that “The tendencies in our society that lead toward submission to authoritarian rule may prepare individuals for a doctrine that can be interpreted as justifying it.”

But of course, that has always been the underpinning of behaviorism—an emphasis on positive reinforcement techniques in order to more effectively encourage “correct behavior.” “Correct behavior,” that is, as defined by school administrators and software makers. What does it mean to give these companies—their engineers, their designers—this power to determine “correct behavior”? How might corporate culture, particularly Silicon Valley culture, clash with schools’ culture and values? These behavior management apps are, in many ways, a culmination of Skinner’s vision for “teaching machines”—“continuous automatic reinforcement.” But it’s reinforcement that’s combined now with a level surveillance and control of students’ activities, in and out of the classroom, that Skinner could hardly have imagined.

Deficit ideology, surveillance capitalism, mindset marketing, and behaviorism are an unholy alliance. My school district has adopted all of them. When we buy into this stuff, we gaslight and harm kids and reward the forces trying to destroy public education. Behaviorists are misbehaving, and the deficit model capitalism of ed-tech is funding and spreading that misbehavior.

“We are breeding a new generation of kids who are well trained to be reward and recognition torpedoes,” Berkowitz writes.

But a substantial body of social science research going back decades has concluded that giving rewards for certain types of behavior is not only futile but harmful. In his book Drive: The Surprising Truth About What Motivates Us, Daniel Pink identifies seven drawbacks to extrinsic rewards: they cripple intrinsic motivation, limit performance, squash creativity, stifle good conduct, promote cheating, can become habit-forming, and spur a short-term mindset. Giving prizes for routine and mindless tasks can be moderately effective, Pink writes. But offering rewards for those tasks that are “inherently interesting, creative, or noble…is a very dangerous game.” When it comes to promoting good behavior, extrinsic rewards are “the worst ineffective character education practice used by educators,” Berkowitz writes.

Many contemporary writers on psychology — specifically the psychologies of work, business, and economics — have written about the value of intrinsic motivation. First observed by researchers in the 1950s, and built upon in the 1970s, intrinsic motivation is often contrasted with extrinsic motivation. The latter is akin to “the carrot and the stick,” while intrinsic motivation originates from internal drives to be good at things and to enjoy them — drives that seemingly have very little to do with carrots and sticks.

People who write about business psychology agree that, in our current economy, fostering intrinsic motivation in workers creates the best outcomes for businesses. Some businesses (and business gurus) call that sort of motivation “happiness.” Others focus on “culture” to foster motivation. But what keeps coming up again and again across all of the business psych books and articles I’ve read (none of which I endorse as products, by the way) are three main concepts that work together as a coherent motivational entity: agency, mastery, and legacy.

Typically, you have to have agency in order to acquire mastery. And you have to have mastery in order to leave a legacy.

Ph.D.s leave academe in search of opportunities for — you guessed it — agency. Then mastery. And then, hopefully, legacy.

The author of Drive: The Surprising Truth About What Motivates Us, Pink has studied findings in psychology and economics, as well as practices in the business world, and identifies three factors as particularly conducive to performance and personal satisfaction:

autonomy, which he defines as “our desire to be self-directed, to direct our own lives”;

mastery, or “our urge to get better at stuff”; and

purpose, the drive to contribute to making something better.

How can we maximize learning? By respecting individuals, by letting their innate curiosity and intense drive to explore and master things do its job. As Sir Ken Robinson and James Marcus Bach have both argued, human development is incompatible with industrial, assembly-line thinking. A far more accurate and helpful metaphor comes from traditional agriculture, where success follows from supporting natural growth processes without attempting to control them.

We’ve built most of our learning environments with sticks and carrots.

We’ve negated the power of choice and the power of letting folks craft an education that is grounded in their aspirations, their vision for themselves.

How do we build learning environments that embrace intrinsic motivation? Autonomy, mastery, and purpose.

Jonathan Mooney offers a great example of intrinsic motivation in this talk. This will take you directly to the relevant spot.