#late diagnosed autism

[thatadhdmood]

an eloquent take down of the "people are self diagnosing autism to be trendy and for attention" take that morons have been echoing on tiktok

[video description is the reblogs, its very long]

[snakeautistic]

I’m really scared that I’m becoming an unlikable person as I unmask. I’m more blunt, I talk more, I advocate for myself more and I’m perceived as argumentative when I’m just trying to offer my thoughts/ explain myself. I make sure not to actively be an asshole, so it’s really more just my tone and the social norms that shouldn’t really matter.

I see people give me looks of annoyance when I speak. The exasperation when I finally work up the courage to actually ask a question.

It’s really freeing to not have to think so hard about my every breath or word in social settings but I still really want people to like me. I guess I need to accept that not everyone will, that’s just how it is, but it makes things hard because then those people will treat you shitty.

And then I wonder… is it just my fault? Maybe I should go back to masking. Maybe it’s not worth it to ‘be myself’ or whatever if it will bring ridicule. Even though there’s that crushing, continuous weight that comes from having to conceal parts of myself, maybe I need to just deal with that so I can get along with others.

But I’m also not sure that I COULD go back now.

[imaginarylungfish]

y'all just ever catch yourself masking alone at home? like hey there brain, no need, babe

[themaskedlady]

[galacticscrotum]

Fellow autistics who mask, I’d like to share my experience with you to see if it’s relatable.

I’ve masked so hard my whole life. I got new headphones 2 days ago and started wearing them in public, as well as bringing my tangle fidget toy and letting myself stim with it and sort of move to the music in my headphones. I’ve gotten some strange looks from people, but because I’m not so stressed out and overwhelmed by all the sounds around me, it’s easier to let it go. Some people did seem to interact with me as though I am a child, which is annoying. But it also feels sort of nice in the way that people return my smiles more and speak kindly to me. It seems like it’s easier for people to regard me as innocent which feels nice because when I’m not “visibly” autistic (headphones and stimming), any social deficits I have appear as a stain on my character. Now that I don’t hide it, people make the connection that me acting weird is because I’m autistic.

It’s weird that people aren’t kind to autistic people who mask. They can feel that we’re not being authentic and they think we’re being fake so we can manipulate people. I don’t like being seen as a child because I have very high intellect and people tend to assume I’m intellectually challenged, but it’s nice that it’s not assumed I have bad intentions when I’m “weird.” I liked that as a child I was presumed innocent at all times, and that I’m treated similarly when I do not mask.

For anyone late-diagnosed and/or self-diagnosed, did you notice a difference in how people treat you when you unmask? Do you get treated more childishly? Are people kinder to you? What’s it like for you to unmask? What’s your experience?

[zebulontheplanet]

hi! may i ask what the difference is between late diagnosed autistic people and ones who were diagnosed earlier? i was diagnosed when i was five and im just curious as to what the difference is between the groups since i've seen you talk about late diagnosed people in general

Hey anon! Sorry for the late response. I’ve been taking a small break from asks. Anyways!

All in all, Late diagnosed folks and Early diagnosed folks have things in common, the big one being that they’re both autistic.

Experiences are different, however I want people to realize that even late diagnosed folks have a different experience from other late diagnosed folks. You can be any support needs and be late diagnosed. I know late diagnosed folks who are low, medium, and high support needs. I know early diagnosed folks who are low, medium, and high support needs.

Is it more common for high support needs folks to be diagnosed early? Yes! But that isn’t a universal experience. There are multiple reasons someone might be late diagnosed.

From being someone who lives in a country that doesn’t know much about autism, to neglect, to lack of funds and insurance for a diagnosis, to being not white or able bodied, to so many things!

The experiences of late and early diagnosed folks are different, but being early diagnosed doesn’t automatically mean that someone got the support they needed. Tons of early diagnosed folks are early diagnosed, slapped with the autism diagnosis, and sent on their way without any support towards their families. This could be for multiple reasons, and I won’t get into that now.

The main group that dominates social media is late diagnosed, usually white, very low support needs people. Yes, any autism awareness is good! But sometimes, too much of awareness of one thing makes it so the awareness and understanding of something is overshadowed and overlooked. This is why a lot of higher support needs, early diagnosed folks have been screaming out for their experiences to be more centered. However, that doesn’t mean that low support needs, late diagnosed folk don’t have a place within the community. They absolutely do! A very important place.

In all, the divide within the community is huge, and while divide in the community is ok, it shouldn’t be so big in my opinion. We need to be on each others side, and that’s hard right now due to the huge divide. However, the divide is happening within the house. And that’s a BIG problem. Although, more people have to realize that late diagnosed and early diagnosed folk have a lot more in common than they realize.

I hope this explains some and if you have any specific questions then let me know! Have a lovely day anon!

[fantasy-harvest-rune]

Btw, when you get diagnosed with autism, the parent who most strongly tries to deny that you could be autistic is the one you got it from. Hope this helps.

[littleautiebird]

As a late diagnosed autistic,

I miss that feeling of when I first discovered my autism. I won’t forget those days when I finally felt seen, more than ever. And the multiple hours spent deep diving into my new special interest in autism as well. That was an exciting time for me, a time of finally finding myself.

[tucsonhorseunmasking]

When I was a kid I would throw*horrible* tantrums. I now recognize that they were probably meltdowns, at least most of them, from overstimulation and demand avoidance symptoms.

My dad worked full time and my mom was a stay at home mom. I have always adored my dad and when I was a kid I eagerly waited for him to get home every day. But some days when I had tantrums he would leave the house again almost immediately. And my mom would say "look what you did, you drove your dad away"

I think about that sometimes and I suspect that fucked me up a lot more than I realized

[silenceinternalmonologue]

want to learn more asl and/or aac methods bc talking out loud exhausts me so much sometimes like rn i feel like i need to sleep for 3 hours after calling on the phone with friend but also it's not like i ever lose the *ability* to speak even if i become slower, less articulate, more exhausted etc so i don't think i'll ever be able to convince people (including myself) that it's an accommodation i need erghhhh has anyone else dealt with this?

[clearingmyheadspace]

365 Days

Photo by Alexas Fotos on Pexels.com It’s been almost 365 days since I last spoke to my older sister, and about 4 months longer since I last spoke to my younger sister. I am sure that they’ve viewed this no-contact period as a “tantrum” or similar “immature” behavior because I didn’t like what they said to me or about me. At least that’s what I believe based on my past experiences with them.

[snakeautistic]

Having undiagnosed autistic parents is a double edged sword, because on one hand they understand your experience intimately even if they can’t explain it, set up your life in a structured way with lots of margins, and assure you that you are not broken or defective for who you are because they’re the same way, but at the same time they also expect you to just ‘suck it up’ and push forward in a hostile neurotypical world because they had to do it too, and dismiss your concerns with ‘that’s just how our family is.’

[imaginarylungfish]

i sometimes like to think of my autism like a superpower and i just have a kyrptonites, like Too Much Noise or Too Much Change or Too Much Social Interaction. Like, sorry. I gotta go recharge this power of mine. So silly

[themaskedlady]

[faulchan]

Got diagnosed at the age if 18 as autistic! Not even a bit surprised, but really relieved

[bipolarmango]

My doctor and therapist: now with this autism + ADHD diagnosis you need to learn to unmask because masking all the time will make you burn out again and feel like shit

Other people: well it's just interesting how after getting the diagnosis you suddenly start behaving like that I mean I'm not saying you're faking it's just funny how you suddenly cannot be normal like you were before