bipolarmango

[bipolarmango]

Don't know who needs to hear this but after abuse it's normal to find fictional characters or celebrities attractive and not real people. It makes sense because they’re safe. They exist in a world where they can’t hurt or manipulate you, so it’s easier to appreciate them without fear of consequences. Real people, on the other hand, carry unpredictability and potential risk, which your mind might be avoiding.

[bipolarmango]

glad to figure stuff out at the fresh age of 34

[bipolarmango]

Stuff my therapist says that's hurtful but true

If, as a child, you had to constantly earn approval or fend off criticism, you may unconsciously seek partners who trigger similar patterns, perhaps in hopes of finally “winning” validation or being “enough” in a way you couldn’t achieve with early caregivers.

[bipolarmango]

I hoped to wake up into a better world this morning but instead woke up to relive a nightmare we've all seen already

[bipolarmango]

yeah, sorry i exhibited symptoms of the disorder i told you i have. it will happen again because i have that disorder and will continue having it. hope this helps!! 🫶🫶🫶

[bipolarmango]

The ADHD mood where you want to play guitar but also finish an assigment for uni but also go jogging but also watch YouTube videos but also make a fancy meal but also clean your wardrobe but also write a personal project you've got going on so you do nothing but stare at the wall for hours

[bipolarmango]

new game plan called shield yourself at all times and never let anyone in . this will have no repercussions

[bipolarmango]

It's great when the same people who turned their back on you after your struggle with mental health and your suicide attempt that landed you into a hospital for months because, and I quote, "your behavior doesn't align with my beliefs" yet they all post all around their social media when another person dies after a mental health battle, claiming they wish they could've done something.

We truly only appreciate people once they're gone, don't we?

[bipolarmango]

Friendly reminder

“Doing your best” does not mean working yourself to the point of a mental breakdown.

[bipolarmango]

Reblog if its ok to spam you with boops

[bipolarmango]

I love jogging but every night it's a struggle when I should go for a jog after a fucking 11-12h of commuting and working. I really want to go but I'm so physically and mentally exhausted I can't. I love reading books but I can't. can barely watch Netflix until collapsing to bed. So no, I won't be having a side hustle when I cannot jog or read or do anything else I love just because I have time to watch Netflix for a few hours.

“If you have time to watch Netflix you have time for a side hustle” my side hustle is relaxing so that my body and brain can heal from by this nose-to-the-grindstone bullshit. I refuse to feel guilty for being a human with the need to relax sometimes. my side hustle is no.

[bipolarmango]

I'm always praying the hyperfixation would be something cool and socially acceptable and it never is

What I mean when I do not control the hyperfixation.

[bipolarmango]

My friend gave such a good answer in her ADHD screening that it changed the way of how I think of these questions and the answers we give. She was asked if she, as a child, often stood up and moved around the classroom without a permission. She looked the psychiatrist dead in the eye and said, "I was a girl in the 90s and 00s, what do you think? I wanted to but I was afraid of the punishment."

generally speaking when it comes to mental and physical health, if you're asked "do you struggle with this" and your answer is "no, Because I Have A System," then your answer is actually yes

[bipolarmango]

Me, on a daily basis: what if I have faked all my symptoms and accidentally misled people and my diagnoses are all wrong and there's nothing wrong with me but being a lazy, stupid, horrible person

My entire medical team who has been watching me from the age of 16:

[bipolarmango]

I'm not even joking, if my partner was a celebrity I would unironically wear their merch in public

[bipolarmango]

Other people: [happily living a normal life, going to work, doing chores, enjoying little things]

Me with my ADHD: I WAS DESTINED TO DO SOMETHING BIGGER THAN THIS, THIS IS NOT ENOUGH, IT'S NEVER ENOUGH AND I'M A FAILURE

[bipolarmango]

People act like they support trauma and abuse survivors but talk shit about the survivors when they

have a (toxic) bond with their abuser and come across as still supporting them

abuse substances

have unhealthy relationships or act in a toxic way towards people

seem like a party animal

come across as cold or calculated

Trauma survivors are not always perfect victims. We are fucked up. Sometimes we don't even know we're fucked up because we don't know we've been abused and hurt.