#lasts forever and I want to cry and die about it
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in hindsight I know the majority of my anxiety around friendship (and in general) pertains to the fact that my longest friendship is falling apart and idk what to do about it
#whimsy whispers#and so do all my friendships but like it’s gotten worse and now it’s like haha none of my friendships are real and will last and nothing#lasts forever and I want to cry and die about it#idk I always thought that we’d be best friends forever and typing that I realize show stupid and idk childish I sound#there’s jsut a strain and idk when it started getting worse or what to do because like we’ve talked about it before but nothing got better#and then I’m just ruining my other relationships by being so insecure and anxious and constantly getting on peoples cases about it#eventually I’m going to be completely alone and idk how to cope with that and it’ll be no one’s fault but my own#idk what to even do to fix anything I don’t know if I can make anything better#idk my best friend was the most important person in the world to me and was my favourite person#and I know they could never say the same about me and that’s fine but now I can’t say that about them either#I don’t really have a favourite or most loved person anymore#like it hurts too much to love people so much and then feel like you’re not as important to them and that’s how I’ve felt for a while#I’m so tired of feeling like this and failing at friendship I keep losing all my friends and like it hurts and is bad
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(╥﹏╥)
#We've had our yearly secret santa gifts exchange at my dorm and I've been gifted the first volume of Beast 😭😭😭😭😭#I'm crying forever. This december marks three years since I've watched the first b/sd episode#and yet this is the first time I actually own a b/sd manga volume. Like I own it and I can read it whenever I want!!! How cool is that!!!!!#Like there's so many Akutagawa images in it!!!! It's insane!!!!!!!! AND IT'S BEAST AT THAT#I'm deeply moved because I never spoke about it to virtually anyone here (at my dorm)?#Like I suppose a bunch of people vaguely know I like anime but only a couple of close friends know I like. Like-like reading manga lol.#And the person who gifted it DEFINITELY didn't know I like anime in general much less b/sd specifically much less Beast in particular!!!!!#I'm 100% sure (they just arrived this year and we hadn't even had that much occasions to talk to each other).#Which means they went through the trouble of gathering intel from my close friends about what I like and actually follow through‚#seek for the specific manga in a comic store etc... It's such a nice gesture I'm so heartwarmed.#And of course I'm glad for every gift I've received in the last years (genuinely)‚ but the fact that this was the most *specific* to what–#I like. It makes it so special! They were so kind.#There must be one (1) person in this whole 60 people dorm who knows I like Beast–#(that would be the girl who introduced b/sd to me in the first place) and the fact that they asked them for it...#I feel both very grateful and lucky lol#When I unwrapped it!!! Like I thought it was just a random book which would have been nice but like!!!!!#When I actually saw through the thin paper the cover!!!! The scream I screamed in my head#Anyways!!!! I own a b/sd manga now!!!!! I've only got time to go through the first chapter so far but it's suchhhh an experience.#It's like reading it for the first time again 😭😭😭 Half because the translation is so much different than the English one lol.#And I basically know the English version by heart. Half because I never saw this kind of high quality!!!!! It's!!!!! Insane!!!!! Like!!!!!!#I'm crying 😭😭😭 The drawings are so sharp and crisp (in the good way). The lines are so clean there's no disturbance at all#I literally never saw anything so good in my life I'm crying a little. I'm so so glad they blessed me with Beast specifically#The takebon edition is pretty cheap (it's just planet manga so there's no color illustrations or dust cover or anything unfortunatelly.#But to make up for it the volumes are significantly cheaper then let's say J-Pop)#There's also some unique typesetting choices? The text from the book-like boxes is in lowercase which is interesting!#Initially I thought I wouldn't have liked the translation (opening it randomly there was Akutagawa saying “crepa!” (“die!”) to Dazai in ch1#Which was kinda jarring since it's very low register and everyone knows Akutagawa has very complex speech patterns.)#But actually reading it I'm really enjoying the translation so far!!!!#There's so many choices that made me grasp details I actually missed all the times I've read the English translation.#That is to say! Very excited to read it!!!! Will probably make a review / translation commentary if I can find the time!!!!!
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almost january which means it's almost st sebastian's feast day which means it's almost light yagami's death day which means it's almost february which means it's almost valentine's day which means im six months behind on all of my projects
#ough i have so much to do and then also real life stuff that makes me want to curl up and die but i really gotta get my applications sent#out n stuff so i know what the fuck im going to be doing with my life before the not knowing kills me#but anyway i have a few things planned that i'd like to get done soon but the biggest one is prolly gonna be valentines day bc like#the cards i did last year took me TEN MILLION YEARS to do and i'd like to make them nicer this year and also i have more mutuals#but i think it'll be fun i think i;ll just have to start much much earlier this time around tho#ive found ive become rlly taken w valentines day since getting on tumblr i like doing valentines things i mean i used to do those irl too#but i like drawing themed cards 4 ppl on here and then getting to send them all it's fun#and i have other projects n i wanna participate in some events (much less than last year tho im thinking One piece per event so i dont#fuck myself over again) and i should rlly get started on kinktober things. might seem early but writing takes me foreverrrrr#and i'd like to have at least one fic done for it that i feel completely happy with#whatever i just have much to do fandom-wise. and also much to do not fandom wise but if i think about it i'll start crying so im thinking#about fandom things#also btw if anyone knows of any new dn events being set up lmk so i can add them to my calendar i think i have all the big ones and their#potential/planned dates set up but i like to know everything forever
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if life is categorized by Before Loss and After Loss then I exist in the before but with a countdown to the after. and the countdown is always always present and debilitating. the loss will be debilitating too but i cant help myself. i will always suffer twice.
#i cant let go of it. i cant even enjoy good moments without thinking about how they'll just be memories one day#how they're already memories since moments pass so fast#everything is I'll Miss This and i already miss it and i cant believe once you're gone you're gone forever#and ill never ever see you again. and your shell is in the ground but where did the rest of you go?#should i look at your body one last time? on one hand itll be the last time i see you.#on the other hand it will be the last time i see you.#and the memory of you will die with me too. as if neither ever existed#it impacts me so much too bc i dont feel close to anybody really...and i dont make friends easily#so whats going to happen when the people who have always been there arent there anymore?#im going to be alone for so much of my life.#i will record your voice so im ready for when i cant hear it from the source while also knowing it wont be enough and one day#ill be wishing it lasted longer. it could be 12 hours long and ill want more.#how do you surpass this? it hasn't even happened. when it happens i don't know what ill do. considering my whole life has been#the timer. the countdown. hours and hours of anticipatory grief#and then ill be next. me. some of all thats left of you. it cant be true.#sorry. this gets worse every single year and its been going insane lately#id surprisingly been managing it well for months somehow ! it wouldnt cross my mind...and now its there again#like it accumulated and its all coming out right now. ive been crying for hrs tonight and last night#one day his things will just be things. things ive made and given him will be in my hands again.#talkys#i want to go hug my dad but then ill just cry over how one day i wont be able to....! how do i store it? how do i save it?#how do i preserve it forever....even as i take my own last breath....#i cant believe im the only one of me. and my dad is the only one of him.#i wouldnt want to be reborn as anyone else. i cant believe one day i wont get to draw or eat or be comfy in bed anymore.#i cant take it !! im so scared. ill be scared until the end. and you wont be there to hold my hand. im going to be alone.#and none of those years of grief and joy and memories will matter.#i wonder if it would help to tell him about this. i need something to hold onto for when it happens. anything. but i also know it'll make i#hurt more; obviously. just another piece of him that'll be gone one day
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:(
#i literally feel VIOLENTLY ill at the fact the hospital handled my mum’s passing so badly that her funeral is exactly ONE MONTH after it#i’ll forever be furious and angry and hurt and traumatised by the way they handled it#like A MONTH#it should not be happening this long after#and it’s her birthday on sunday so maybe i’m just feeling ten times worse because of that#but it’s not fair#it’s never gonna be fair#why the FUCK did she get taken from me like this#and then having to be the only one who knew about her funeral plans bc she only told me#and then everybody including my dad tells me how strong i am#IM NOT STRONG!!?!!?!??!?#i’m a girl who needs her mama. i’m just a girl who is so lost and confused and needs her mama#i literally want 2 die#tw death#i turned my tv off and immediately started crying bc i felt like the worst person in the world#did i not love her enough#should i have been better to get#*her#idk i just want her to know i adored her#and i need to hear her voice and get a hug#one of the last things she said to me was ‘i love you more’ well i love you most so how about that#tw grief#i am never getting over losing her#please . feel free to let me rant i just feel like i can’t talk to my dad or family bc like idk .#i always talked to my mum about my emotions and well! that can’t happen anymore lmfao 😭#i just need a place to vent the HELL out of my feelings bc i am not going back to therapy
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i would like to stop experiencing the full spectrum of human emotions every day please. putting this out into the universe
#had suchhh a good workday. had hot pot with my roommate where we talked about our quarter life crises#and then came home and had a 3 hour screaming match with both of my parents where i said i was cutting them out of my life#it turns out. my dad still does not understand what the word bi means even tho his fucking wife is bi#he was like 'so you marry someone and six months later you see someone else you like and u go marry them instead?'#like genuinely. truly trying to understand#and that shocked me enough to stop crying#do not reblog please#like in hindsight it is SO funny#and that was the point where i was like. wait is this not malice#this is homophobia but i don't think it's malice#anyways we're all Ok now#we've agreed that i'm going to do what i want#and even if they're unhappy they're still gonna have a relationship with me#and they'll figure out how to adjust#my brother periodically came into the room and also screamed at my parents#i feel bad for them a lil bit. like they're not bad people#after he left my mom told me that a week and a half ago#my brother came into her room and told her that when she died he would bury her in a grave instead#of the traditional last rites (cremation rituals etc etc)#if she wouldn't accept me#and my mom said she was on a bunch of meds cause she's sick so she was so out of it it didn't even register what he was going on about#and then today after that convo she was like WAIT A MIN WHAT THE FUCK DID THIS BOY SAY TO ME#funniest 16 year old u could have on your side#truly he kept coming into the room every 5 min and going HEY HAVE YOU BOTH CONSIDERED NOT BEING HOMOPHOBIC. HAVE YOU.#HEY CAN U TELL YOUR DAUGHTER YOU STILL LOVE HER MAYBE??? THINK??? USE YOUR BRAIN???#this is why i would die for this kid#he's the best#he's such an idiot most of the time but when he's not being an idiot he's my favorite person on earth#don't tell him that tho anyone please#he'll hold it against me forever and ever as siblings do
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...
#theres this feeling i get sometimes. i find it very hard to articulate. its part despair and part awe. dispair at how beautiful the world is#all those intricate little process coming together to organize the chaos. i dont kno y i feel it so deeply or y it hurts so much#because its just. no matters what horrible things r going on in the world. ur body is this miraculous collection of chemicals and reactions#mobile containers of water with a history that spirals back billions of years. and you can hear and see and experience and reflect#and when you die the world goes on spinning without you. if we as humans destroyed this planet past the part of our ability to inhabit it#it wouldnt even matter. there would be continued life past humanity. cosmically we r tiny and insignificant and we dont matter#but were beautiful and wonderful and infinity complex and knowing that leaves me in agony. because i want to kno everything right now but#mind is too small and i walk around with the disorientation of someone whos just been hit in thr face ans i cant focus enough to read#cant make the words make sense and i cant justify the time it would take to try. so i sit on my deck. in the sun. crying as i think about#how the light hit the grass in my front yard the last time i was home. how the cliffs in the backyard are ringed with red lines of iron#separated out as the water leached through the sandstone. how every avaliable surface is stained green as organisms reach upward toward#the sun. and its beautiful and i dont kno y im crying. maybe its bc i cant just throw everything aside and chase that feeling. im not#allowed to feel it. im not allowed to talk abt it in the way i want. bc im afraid no one cares as much as me in the same way. bc when i#talk abt what i study its obscure and academic and so far from what most ppl think abt that they get intimidated and dont try to understand#so i just try not to talk abt it. or maybe im just afraid. bc i have my 1st TA meeting tomorrow and i meet with my new advisor friday#and im worried and im afraid i wont b able to do this in a way that doesnt make me feel like im dying. bc i like to b busy and i like having#a strict schedule but if u throw me that knife im going to stab myself with it bc i dont kno how wield it as a tool without hurting myself#sure ill get the job done. but at what cost? whatever. ill try to b better this time. try to hold tight to the wonder. but that feels like#reaching out into forever. knowing ill never make contact. not knowing what im reaching for.#the closest approximation to the feeling i can find is that scene in the terror. where go0dsir is asking if god is there. any god. and it#doesnt matter bc he can see god in the landscape. in an environment that's so harsh and barren that its killing him slowly in the worst of#ways and its beautiful. its still beautiful to him. there is wonder here. and im wasting my time laying in a dark room crying bc i put#myself into a container so constrictive that the surface snaps and i come spilling out as an angry liquid. smearing away into nothing#unrelated
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anyone else ever get in those silly goofy moods where u just hate urself sooo much that u instantly feel physically almost violently ill just thinking abt urself and also even tho u worked a 12hr shift w no breaks or water running off of the 2 cups of coffee u had for breakfast 20 hours ago, the thought of eating instantly sends bouts of nausea coursing thru ur soul while churning in ur stomach bc ur brain hates u so much that its convinced ur body that u don’t deserve sustenance or anything else that’s life sustaining or promotes ur physical well being because u subconsciously convinced urself that ur such a shit excuse for a human being that u neither deserve nor have any right to anything regarding maslow’s hierarchy of needs bc u r such an awful thing u deserve to be neglected n treated like the nonliving object ur own brain sees ur living body as or am i just mentally ill lol
#laying in bed everytime i think abt myself i feel literally nauseated n like it’s so weird#this feeling comes in waves intermittently just even .01 sec of ‘hm i’m hungry’ FFFFFNOPE HRRGRHFFF VOMITTY#i want to curl up in a ball and die forever i don’t care about me i don’t want to take care of me anymore i’m not even good at it#whyyyyyyyy did i stop taking my meddsssssss i guarantee y’all this is why i’m being such a crybaby on the dash lmaoooo#i have a headache i’m def dehydrated from crying n sniveling n barely drinking any water today while sweating like a mf at work#imma go to bed 🛌 if i don’t wake up i will be soooo pleasantly surprised y’all have no idea FINGERS CROSSED🤞#real talk tho can someone tell me why my body is literally reacting this way for like no real reason#like am i truly that disgusted with myself i make myself nauseous just thinking abt me#ok yeah the answer is yes lol BUT LIKE WHY THATS SUCH A DRAMATIC BODILY RESPONSE TO MY BRAINS DUMBASS THOUGHTS???#ik the body and mind have a super powerful link n the brain influences the body like crazy but like#why this why does my brain literally want me to berate and degrade myself and isolate me and make me cry alone n starve me that’s so mean#i’m not starving btw i’m literally always eating just these past 2 days i’ve been such a fuckup my body won’t let me do anything#i had a chocolate poptart for dinner last night (thurs) n threw myself to bed#i hope i don’t end up hurting myself that would be so lame#i literally don’t have time for that like i am Not doing wound care duty off the clock for my damn self lol#also don’t want to take care of myself so i wouldn’t bandage myself up properly sooo yeah i’m not gonna do anything actually#cleaning ur wounds r super important ok yall ur literally playing god if u don’t do good aftercare snfjfbdj#i can’t believe i’m in this nasty ugly depressive episode i hate this so much i don’t have time for this i hate this cycle#i hate being bipolar 2 n my moods n meds have been so fkcdd up lately that i don’t even have the rlly fun hypomanic episodes anymore#i’ve just been constantly having mixed episodes im unbearable to be around im so sorry for everyone that’s ever spoken to me im insufferable#ok that’s enough im done being dramatic lmao#im gonna give myself a bolus PRN dose of clonnie then i’m going tf to bed#ramblings#shut up cianna
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one of the things that will forever hunt me and make me feel bad about myself its the fact that I know the whole fcking backstory of the "I dont fit in and I dont wanna fit it, Im weird, Imma weirdo, have you ever seen me without this stupid hat on?" scene
I feel so bad, like I cant believe it, like people dont have to know I watched it when it came out but I know it and I feel sorry for my soul
it really gets me down
(sorry for the multiple missspelled words in the tags, Its late and I didnt doble check and Im tired and I dont think I cant re write all of that)
#like Ive been watching fcking tiktok compilations on youtube which is sad enough but everytime that clip comes out I feel such sorrow#I want to die#I mean cry#I want to cry#I feel so bad for myself#I cant believe I liked that#riverdale#jughead jones#being a riverdale fan back in the day its my biggest darkest secrets#it will haunt me forever#if someone ever gives me the chance to erase something from my brain I will not hesitate Ill beg them to delete any detail of riverdale#thats coming from someone who stopped watching after episode 3 of season 3 maybe#like you know that scene from stranger things where theyre burning the upside down tunnels thats what I want them to do in my brain w river#“i wish I could wake up with amnesia and forget about the stupid little things” but its riverdale#its not a break up its just deep deep regret and hours and years of my life I'll never get back and will haunt me forever#like that episode of Sonny with a chance where they go to public school#thats how riverdale memories make me feel#one of the scenes that will haunt me forever its Betty seeing her mom and sister about to burn her niece and nephew for a ritual#and thats bc I decided that was my last straw and ran away as fast as I could from that show and now I'll never know what happens afterward#trapped depressed ansious thats how that Sonny w a chance ep & Riverdale make me feel#also strime cringe#like Cherryl pigblood Josie stalker ???? WHY DID NOBODY EVER TALKED ABOUT THAT EPISODE AGAIN???? WHATS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE??#THAT LET ME DEEPLY DISTURBED STRIMLY SCARED#AND THE GUY NEVER HEARD BACK FROM JOSIE BC CHERRYL TOLD HER HE DID THAT? AND SHE KEEP BEING FRIENDS W CHERRYL#The fact that they used to air this episodes at the same time that in the US but in my country it was between 12 & 1 am#I HAD TO GO TO BED AFTER THAT!
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happy life, happy wife | hugh jackman
an: “you attract what you fear” GUYS IM SO SCARED OF A 55 YEAR OLD AUSTRALIAN 😭 definitely thinking about making marvel actress!reader x hugh an actual series… i have ideas
marvel actress!reader
Deadpool & Wolverine Press tour - Hot Ones
Hugh felt like he was going to die. Each wing was getting hotter and hotter, but immediately when he heard his wife’s name he forgot all about the spice.
“Hugh, your wife is part of the Avengers, how does it feel having your wife be part of such a huge franchise? Have you two talked about a potential team up with the X-men and the Avengers?” Sean asked.
“My wife . . . Oh god, I think I’m crying-”
“I can’t tell if you’re legitimately dying or completely in love with your wife.” Ryan told Hugh.
“Wait . . I am completely in love with my wife and I would legitimately die for her.” Hugh gasped as he rearranged Ryan’s words.
“Is that in the contract she made you sign when you married her? ‘I vow to die for you’. My contract said I had to give all my money to my kids and wife.” Ryan said.
“No, she’s amazing, um, if I start talking about her I think I might go on for hours,” he laughed. “Our kids do want to see their parents fighting the bad guys together. We would love to team up, maybe it could happen.” Hugh smiled.
“The entire movie would be them making out and her beating the shit out of you. I’d pay to see that.” Ryan added.
•••
Comic Con 2024
Like RDJ, your last Marvel movie had been Avengers: Endgame. After being in ten mcu films, it was time to say goodbye to your character.
But that was in 2019.
At this years comic con, you were back. The cast of Deadpool & Wolverine had taken the stage and showed their appreciation for the fans. After their panel, it was time to announce Marvel’s upcoming projects. Kevin Feige announced the Fantastic Four, Thunderbolts, Captain America 4, and finally the new Avengers movies, which everyone was extremely excited about.
After showing the title card for the upcoming Avengers film, Kevin turned to the audience.
“Something people have been asking, as of late, is who the heck is going to direct these two movies?” The audience clapped.
From the side of the stage, you were nervous. What if the fans didn’t like the idea of you directing the next two Avengers films? Your worrying caused Hugh to come to your rescue.
“Hey, they loved you as an Avenger, they will love you even more.” Hugh kissed your forehead. “If anyone says anything about this decision, they have me to deal with.”
You laughed at his words. “I really love you so much.”
“Love you too, bub.” Hugh was about to kiss you when Ryan cut in.
“I really love us too. I convinced half of the people here that we’re a throuple.” He said in the most serious tone ever.
Kevin announced you as the director. Your doubt of the fans not liking the announcement was proven wrong when you walked the stairs to the stage and stood next to Kevin. They cheered when they saw you were back.
As you said a few words, thanking Marvel, Kevin and the fans, you were being recorded by Hugh, who was being recorded by Ryan.
“That’s my wife!” Hugh cheered from backstage, holding his phone in his hand.
“She’s Marvel Jesus now, holy shit!”
•••
WIRED autocomplete interview
“Is Hugh Jackman married?”
“Yes, to me, Y/n, probably to half the population,” Ryan answered. “He’s Australia’s biggest slut.”
“All the times, I proposed.” Hugh laughed. “But yes, I am married and I love my wife very much. She’s stuck with me forever.” He lifted his hand to show off the wedding band.
“Funny, because she texted me right now. Her and Blake are in the courthouse getting married. So Deadpool three was actually made so our wives could divorce us and marry each other.”
#hugh jackman#hugh jackman x reader#hugh jackman imagine#wolverine#marvel actress!reader#wolverine x reader#wolverine fanfiction#hugh jackman fanfic#hugh jackman one shot
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wrong guy, lando norris
summary: fans think yn is dating max, but they've got the wrong guy [bsf!reader]
been a min since i posted! honestly, these just take me way too long and i usually end up abandoning them because i start hating them halfway through from overthinking lol. hope you enjoy this one though (: xx
y/n.y/l 📍 Ibiza, Spain
Liked by riabish, carlossainz55 and 159.870 others
y/n.y/l we only argued 3 times, cried 2, and got lost 1 (personal record)
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user9 right so who argued? who cried? and most importantly whO IS THE SHADOW?
user14 can we talk about how u're LITERALLY glowing in that first pic? u look so happy, girl!!
user20 the vibes on this dump… rich people's holidays just hit different.
iamrebeccad ✓ Beautiful girl 😍
y/n.y/l 🫶🏼 miss youu!!
user4 “cried 2 times” is actually impressive ♥︎ by author
user55 lando and max just casually being brothers in the fourth pic 😩❤️
user81 that shot is just *chef’s kiss*!!!! Glad we can always count on this queen for hq content
user63 Okay so I’ve been staring at this shadow pic for like 10 minutes, and I can’t figure it out…
user33 my money’s on max bc that hug pic of them earlier too… feels very coupley.
user63 idk friends to lovers agenda thriving tho
user3 Max and Lando with the face masks are killing me 😂 ♥︎ by author
user6 max or lando? place your bets now. i’m team max but i’ll die on this hill if i'm wrong
user2 which you are, because it’s definitely Lando
user8 guys they’ve literally known each other since forever and go on these friends holidays all the time lmao this is just FRIENDSHIP GOALS. stop romanticising everything!!!
user24 then explain the head kiss?
user8 friendly head kisses???
user24 friendly kisses?? in this economy? be serious. that’s couple behaviour
user12 smells like a third wheel in here…
y/n.y/l sorry, that's just me. i am the third wheel🙋🏼♀️
user13 she really said 'stop shipping me with my best friends' lol
user44 max and lando with the face masks in the water might be my new favourite photo of all time
user16 ngl that's not bad statistics for a week long trip ♥︎ by author
user11 If it’s Max, I’ll cry. If it’s Lando, I’ll cry harder. If it’s neither, I don’t know what I’ll do.
user18 i’ve been following these three for years and i’m still trying to figure out if that last slide is supposed to be romantic or not….? HELP I AM SO CONFUSED
user22 what book is that? i need recommendations!!
y/n.y/l just for the summer!!! LOVED it x
user10 i can’t believe she was so chill about posting thAT LAST PIC!??!! miss y/l!!! SPILL NOW
maxfewtrell ✓ Why are you saying 'we'? Pretty sure you were the one who did all of those
landonorris ✓ classic move, shifting the blame
y/n.y/l @/landonorris @/maxfewtrell the getting lost part was definitely a team effort
user1 I need to go on a trip with friends like this ♥︎ by author
user5 being that close to lando AND max and surviving the friendship without catching feelings was too good to be true let's be honest
pietra.pilao 😍😍
y/n.y/l 💞💞
user7 so when’s the next ‘friends holiday'? asking for a friend (me)
15 August 2024
maxfewtrell ✓
Liked by landonorris, y/n.y/l and 98.982 others
maxfewtrell The real girlfriend reveal, for the record 🫡
👤 pietra.pilao
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user1 WAIT WHAT
user6 so it really wasn’t Y/n??
pietra.pilao ❤️❤️ ♥︎ by author
user4 omg she's the girl who commented on yn's holiday dump!!!
user3 We owe Max and his gf an apology 😭 She’s stunning, btw
user2 omg u two are so cuteeeeeeee! happy for u max :)
user5 your gf is so pretty 😭😭😭
y/n.y/l P!!!! 💕💕
y/n.y/l you two make a better couple than you and I ever would anyway 😂 ♥︎ by author
user9 WHY DIDN’T YOU SAY THIS EARLIER?! we’ve been spiralling for WEEKS
user12 actually he's been saying it from the beginning. we just didn't want to listen 😂😂
user8 max: “here’s my gf. leave me out of y/n’s business”
user12 OK but pietra is STUNNING!! Max, you’ve been hiding her for how long?!
user7 the way he had to clarify this because of us is actually hilarious. sorry, Max.
user11 OMG I feel so dumb now we really had y/n in a whole relationship she wasn’t even in 😭
29 August 2024
y/n.y/l
Liked by oscarpiastri, sophiaaemelia and 289.034 others
y/n.y/l outtakes from ai·bee·thuh
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user1 AAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!?? MYSTERY SOLVED IG
user12 I THINK THIS MIGHT BE THE GREATEST THING TO HAPPEN TO MY FEED THIS YEAR I AM NOT EVEN JOKING
maxfewtrell ✓ So Lando gets the cute video and I get the passed out in the car pic? Playing favourites, I see. Noted.
user8 Max calling out Y/n for favoritism is peak sibling energy
user33 i can't believe we were full on shipping them not even a week ago omg
maxfewtrell ✓ Also, can everyone stop tagging me in that shadow pic now? Like, I’m good, it’s definitely not me 😅 ♥︎ by author
user11 pietra honestly deserves a medal for surviving this holiday with these three omg
user17 GUYS I WAS ALREADY PRETTY SHOCKED AT LANDO'S VIDEO BLOWING A KISS I HAD NO IDEA WHAT I HAD COMING
pietra.pilao Special week 🤍 ♥︎ by author
user81 the lift photo with the McDonald’s bag is so relatable. even on a fancy holiday, you gotta have your nuggets ♥︎ by author
user25 turns out Max wasn't lying when he said y/n wasn’t his headache... lando’s the lucky one 😂
user10 and y/n and pietra? they do ✨besties ✨ better than anyone ♥︎ by author
user19 can we get a ‘whoops, my bad’ from the ppl who saw them in Ibiza and STILL missed the fact that Pietra was there?
user2 they literally had a front row seat to the full gossip and still didn’t catch on !!!!! like hELLO? u had one job
user14 THE SOFT LAUNCH TURNED INTO A HARD LAUNCH REAL QUICK I AM SHOOK
alexandrasaintmleux ✓ Ahhh loveeee 🩷🩷 ♥︎ by author
user26 both boys punching above their weight fr. i said what i said.
francisca.cgomes ✓ ❤️❤️😍 ♥︎ by author
user16 The way Max is sleeping in that last pic has me wheezing ♥︎ by author
user3 lando is literally holding y/n like he’s never letting her go boy is WHIPPED
user29 WE'RE GOING TO SEE "LANDO NORRIS' PARTNER" UNDER YN'S NAME NOW WHEN SHE WATCHES FROM THE GARAGE what a time to be alive
user7 not the way y/n is casually posting a McDonald’s bag in a robe and THEN dropping the most beautiful couple pic with lando
user5 waIT SO THE BOY KISSING HER HEAD IN THE SHADOW PIC WAS LANDO??? WE WERE ALL WRONG. I NEED TO LIE DOWN.
maxfewtrell you know, it truly baffles me how this was barely even considered
y/n.y/l no one believed in me enough to be able to pull f1 race winner lando norris. humbling.
user20 YN I - 😭😭😭😭💀💀
user38 it was a couple’s holiday the whole time 😭😭 I need a moment to recover
user9 this fandom’s clownery knows no bounds istg.........
user21 not me crying over the hard launch of the year when I was just admiring Max’s sleeping face 5 seconds ago
user24 Ibiza really gave us everything: friendship goals, couple goals, and max in a food coma
user18 IT WAS LANDO KISSING HER HEAD. I feel so betrayed by my own theories and also pretty disappointed in myself i couldn't tell it was his shadow
landonorris ✓ I see you saved the best for last 🖤
y/n.y/l ☺️☺️
y/n.y/l omg guys i wasn’t being dry i just don’t know what else to say with all you watching 😭😭
1 September 2024
#social media au#f1 imagine#f1 smau#f1 x reader#lando norris smau#lando norris x reader#lando norris x y/n#bsf!reader#lando norris imagine#lando norris x you
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⠀ ( drabble ) finally forever ̨ ! ୨୧ 一 박성훈 ՞
⸃ ⸰ ⌁ sunghoon tying himself to you for once and for all ヾ
yandere!sunghoon・ reader g ・ yandere cw ・ mentions of murder, unprotected sex, breeding kink, crying kink wc ・ 0.8k | click to library
request. yandere sunghoon smut PLEASE, your yan work has got me salivating. It can be any scenario you would like (punishment, stokeholm syndrome i hope u get what I mean) love your work !! take care. 🫶
「 ୨୧ authors note 」 hope this is what you wanted 🫶🏽🩷
you no longer walked on eggshells when sunghoon was around like you did when you first started whatever it is you had — you no longer fought with him about leaving ; in fact you hated when he'd leave or when he said he'd take you out. . . all you wanted was to have him to yourself.
sunghoon didn't see that at first; he thought you were just trying to fuck with him , waiting for him to let his guard down just to leave , so he tried everything to get to you — chaining you up to your bed , leaving you without food; that didn't work , he'd come home to you sitting on the bed , waiting for him.
he even tried bringing another girl home; no he had no intentions of sleeping with her , she was purely there just to see if you squirmed; and when you didn't , instead you cried , he killed her , there was no use for her and of course he couldn't let her go , you being tied to the bed kinda threw her off and he didn't want her to call the cops — even then you didn't do anything , not a flinch or anything.
he didn't even console you as you cried thinking he was tired of you — he still didn't fully believe it , he believed this was all an act , that was until you wrapped your arms around him , begging for him to never leave him , that you needed him; that you wouldn't be able to go on without him… that's when he knew he had you.
“you'd die without me?” he said , you sniffled, nodding your head. “stop all that whining , i killed her you saw it.” he said. “i was never gonna sleep with her.” your eyes were red, tears streaming down your face — it was fucking turning him on. “pl-please don't do that again.” you said. “you've acted like a bitch this entire time , why should i listen to you.”
“you know how much trouble you put me through? how many people died because of you?” he grabbed both your hands. “things won't change that easily because you suddenly love me , you still need to be punished.” he dragged you back to the room , throwing you the bed. “you want me to believe that you really won't leave?” he said , cuffing both hands , binding you back to the bed. “then shut the fuck up and let me do what i want to you.”
you laid there; no resistance as he pulled your pants down , leaving you in the underwear he bought. “you love me now?” pulling his pants down , freeing his cock from his underwear , it was your first time ever seeing his dick. “y-yeah.” you stuttered , pulling your panties to the side. “look at this wet cunt , no matter if this shit is just an act , this pussy is definitely singing a different tune.”
“i-i do love you.” you cried out. “i-i swear.” he let out a tsk sound. “then show me.” was the last thing he said before stuffing you completely full of his cock. “oh yeah fuck!” he groaned , wasting no time in thrusting into you. “so warm , fuck i waited so long for this.” he gripped your waist , holding your waist in his hands , as he began to pound into you. “hoonie fuck!”
he never heard that nickname came out your mouth , but it only encouraged him to fuck you deeper , and with much more force. “shit , should just use this little pussy until you can't take it anymore.” he hissed. “forget if you cum or not.” he slapped your cunt. “sunghoon.” you screamed pulling at the restraints. “use you as my cum dump.”
you began to tear up again , he was being really mean. “keep crying , show me how sorry you are.” you sobbed out and apology after apology , not even sure what you were apologizing for. “im sorry , im so sorry.” you said in between sobs. “please let me cum , i need to cum , please i love you so much.” he heard enough , plus he was on the brink of cumming himself. “cum , cum now.”
he gave your clit a few slaps as you came , creaming his cock , tightening around him. “fuck I'm gonna fill you up , keep you pregnant with my kids so you'll have no choice to stay.” he didn't really like the idea of child , but if was to get reassurance that you'd stayed with him then so be it. “fuck im gonna cum inside you.”
“please hoonie , please fill me with your cum.” you begged , he gave you a few more thrust, stilling his hips as his cock pumped a load of his cum into you. “fuck , you're mine.” he groaned. “this is my fucking pussy.” his hand coming up to your throat. “you're mine , and a few kids will solidify that.”
“gonna fuck a few brats inside you so you'll be stuck with me forever.”
©LUVYENI
#enhypen x reader#enhypen imagines#enhypen scenarios#enhypen x female reader#enhypen hard thoughts#enhypen hard hours#enhypen smut#enhypen yandere#yandere enhypen#sunghoon imagines#sunghoon scenarios#sunghoon smut#sunghoon x female reader#sunghoon fanfic#park sunghoon smut#park sunghoon hard hours#park sunghoon x reader#park sunghoon hard thoughts
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HE SAW FOREVER SO HE SMASHED IT UP
katsuki bakugou x reader
the times bakugou broke your heart
heavily inspired by mbobhft
1) the denial
“are we breaking up?”
“…yeah.”
“oh.”
his reasons made sense. he had a job, a goal, a burning drive to prove himself as the best. he was burnt out, his fingers worked to the bones. he couldn’t give you not just what you wanted, but what you needed. and that killed him more than it did you.
it made sense. the gears turned. the writing was on paper. like almost everything he did, it worked out. of course it worked out for katsuki bakugou- he’s the best.
it wasn’t all that set in stone for you, however.
he could have given you a million more reasons before the tears spilled. “i’m an asshole.” true. “i don’t treat you right.” fair. “you deserve so much fuckin’ better, [y/n.]” yeah, he was right.
but you always liked to challenge the acceptable.
at first, it didn’t hit you as hard as you thought it would. you walked through your room, too numb to pay mind to the tears that rolled down your cheeks, and silently packed up his sweaters into a box. the necklace he gave you, the ‘k’ pendant, came off your neck like a butterfly lands on a branch, knowing that its death is inevitable and doing nothing to stop it.
at night, you cried, and cried, and cried. you called him about 27 times. he never answered. he texted you to make sure you were okay, but your tear-blurred eyes kept you from seeing the keyboard clearly. you left him on seen and prayed that he was worried, prayed that his heart would explode at your lack of an answer, prayed to god that he would come over just to check on. suffice to say your prayers were left unanswered.
you thought he’d call. but he didn’t. but your soul remained devoted, eyes glued to your phone screen and hands shaking. he has to call. he has to tell you goodnight. he has to tell you that you’re an idiot. he has to tell you he loves you. he’s going too, idiot.
right?
2) the anger
if he wanted you dead, why didn’t he just say?
your heart burned for anger. for salvation. for revenge. you knew katsuki bakugou knew anger well, but he had no idea the way your soul flared like a whole new depth of hell.
you laid in bed, awake, eyes excruciatingly drive from crying your tear ducts may as well have been burnt off. memories of him haunted your brain while your fists tightened.
you regretted giving him your heart. your love. your late nights and early mornings. your fights, your passions, your 2ams and your smiles. you hated the way you let him draw the laughter out of you, how he showed parts of himself to you he had never shown anyone.
and those little things that made up your love, he was going to use on someone else. you knew it.
he was going to cook them his special fried rice his mom taught him how to do. he was going to teach them how to punch because he doesn’t want them to get hurt- something he did for you. he was going kiss them how he kissed you, love them in a way that should have only been you.
but he shouldn’t. in fact, he should look back at what you had, and regret every. single. thing. he did to let is end. he should regret everything he didn’t do to keep you. he should burn alive from guilt. scream. cry. fight for his life while his body is doused in gasoline. attempt miserably to tear the fire off his skin while it burned him to a crisp. he should die screaming.
he should deserved it, after all. because he heard your screams, and put his headphones on.
3) the bargaining
please. you wailed. who do i have to talk to? what do i have to do to get him back!?
you suddenly thought of so many scenarios in your head, scenarios fuelled by false hope. things you’d do to kiss him one last time, to hold him, to love him and be loved by him. you’d dry the ocean water. you’d turn stones into gold. you’d bring him to heaven and back. you’d get out of bed. you’d compromise more. you wouldn’t forget to kiss him. you’d love him. you’d love him so much harder. please.
suddenly everything seemed possible. if someone answered your calls, if someone made a deal with you, you’d offer up everything. you were sure you’d place everything on the line for him. you want it all back- his yelling, his snark, his nicknames, his attitude, his everything- no, your everything. you’d pluck out your own eyes for his red ones, or your heart for his heroic soul that loved you brighter than anyone else. being loved by katsuki bakugou was something you wouldn’t trade for anything- turns out you couldn’t trade it either.
4) the depression
everything smelled like him. your sheets blossomed into his sweet, burnt scent, the one that he’d leave behind whenever he slept over simply because he left you. all your jackets felt like his chiseled arms, wrapped around you as if you’d be gone in a moments notice. his voice was everywhere. the songs on the radio, the words you read on your phone, and the memories that played like your favourite movie soundtrack.
you wondered if he knew you couldn’t get out of bed. sometimes you imagined him calling your ass lazy, and then dragging you out of bed with a kiss to your forehead and a breakfast he cooked for you. maybe then you’d rip off the sheets and face the day. but right now, your bed was the only place you could mourn.
it was cruel, in a sense. letting you fall in love with him only to leave. letting you fall in love with his stupid smug smirk, his laugh, his teasing, his anger, his unreasonable handsomeness, his millions of pet peeves and trigger words, his clinginess, his distance, his days and nights, ups and downs, his hate and love all tied into one. he made you love him, knowing you would never get to love another katsuki bakugou.
5) the acceptance
acceptance was bakugou realizing how badly he fucked up.
part 2 soon!
#bnha kirishima#bnha shinsou#bsd chuuya#bnha todoroki#boku no hero acedamia#boku no academia#my hero academy fanfiction#mha manga spoilers#mha todoroki#mha roleplay#mha bakugou#mha x reader#bnha bakugo katsuki#bakugou katsuki#bakugou x reader#bnha bakugou#katsuki bakugo mha#katsuki bakugo x reader#bnha manga spoilers#mha dabi#boku no hero academia#bnha x y/n#bnha x reader#mha x gender neutral reader#my hero x reader#my hero academia#my hero acadamy#mha fanart#mha deku#mha oc
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Thinking about drinking again want to be home alone forever that’s called moving out idiot get a job lol thanks brain anyways where’s the vodka
#I will drink soon I know I will but not 2nite#sleepy tired tonight but that’s good I need to be tired to sleep cause my brain has been evil with all the trauma flashbacks recently#I got like three hours of sleep last night and I’m exhausted rn but can’t sleep#I just feel like shit and I hate my incredibly accurate and vivid memory rn#great for writing horrible for living my life#me and Sylvia Plath like this fr 🤞#I need to die or sleep already I am miserable and only getting worse but I am also applying to jobs and becoming more of an actual person#while actively descending into madness#haha yeah anyways swag swag swag I think I might be going into a bit of a depressive episode and trying so desperately to get out of it#before it’s really started but it feels like the world is crushing me and there’s nothing I can do#I need to get back on my meds fuck that will fix me why are my chemicals so fucked up forever ugh#I will be mentally I’ll all of my life I just need to deal with it but god the violent thoughts are never ending and I need to tear#someone apart viciously or write poetry about a wolf#that will fix me#okay bye#going to go try to write or sleep or cry maybe#fuuuuuuuck I wanted to post this but now I’m on post limit cause my stupid reblogging ass fuck me I hate myself okay bye ugh I’ll schedule#this for midnight#I wrote this at nine thirty btw
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Gojo Satoru
TW: implied noncon, desperate starved reader, God!Gojo
gn reader
based on this by @hawnks
He's worshipped, but worship alone doesn’t make those who pray by his shrine his belongings.
Even pets run away when they don't like the food.
He could take lives, which suppose some of his fellow gods might view as ownership, but right when he ran out of places to wash the blood off his hands, he’d sooner found it to be an empty pastime bearing no merit.
After all, taking lives doesn't mean they belong to you—it just means they’re dead.
He'd come to realize that the power to take is a far cry from the prospect of actually owning something—something he can truly call his. He could level a forest and everything in it, crush mountains to deserts, drink the entire ocean dry—but it wouldn’t make any of it his.
It leaves him feeling stingy when yet another measly human comes before him—on your knees with your forehead bowed in the dirt, skinny hands shaking while laid flat out before you, cracked lips crying his name.
With his chin propped in his palm, he yawns while listening to you, and with jaded eyes, he nearly dismisses you altogether. But there’d been a question he’d been mulling over lately—one that had found its way to the tip of his tongue.
“What do I get in return?”
You’re only asking for very little—one of the humbler humans who still bother praying to him. You might see it as greedy of him to ask you for something in return—a poor soul with nothing but your sorry name. But what you don’t understand is that you and he are the exact same.
Dirt poor.
In many ways, he has it a lot worse. You could die. He could not. Infinity would pan on forever and drag him with it as if with a ball and chain—and he’d remain destitute and alone for the entirety of it all.
Which is why…
“You can have me, I guess…”
It sounded so sweet—like a vow.
You say it with such defeat, as though you’ve already accepted his rejection—as though you’re about to offer yourself to the forest next—as though you're worth nothing more than returning to soil again.
You don’t notice the new light in his eyes that threatens to swallow you whole, nor do you hear the growl in his gut like a beast awoken from a deep slumber—starved to death if he only could. His tongue swells with sweetness, it nearly runs over and spills down his chin.
Your offer hangs still in the air, poised and waiting for him to grab it, brighter than a star. It nearly frightens him—how much he wants it—how desperately he yearns for it. His fingertips buzz with thrill as he reaches out. He’s never held something like it before—soft and warm and flickering with something fleeting and precious. It almost feels wrong for him to hold it in his blood-soaked hands. Eyes all but blacked out as he looks down at it.
“Mine, you say?”
You feel it, too, but it’s not close to the same sense of elevation—how he reaches into your chest and scribbles his name on your soul. Each letter is heavier than the last and leaves you curling in on yourself in agony, screaming before you fall silent.
Panting once you look up, you clutch your chest, only to see his sneer gone, replaced by something worse—something haunting.
The regret is palpable. You pick yourself up and take to running away—but by then, it’s too late. You don’t make it more than two steps before something has you tugged right back—this time into his embrace.
“I accept your generous sacrifice, little human.”
His words weigh awfully heavy while you shudder in his lap. His skin is like marble—shimmery and cold as his hands wrap around you, holding you tightly as he puts his lips to your neck.
"I'll take precious care of you..."
You feared he’d bite, but the kisses that commence feel no less like a collar being fastened snug around your throat. As well as his promise—like being sentenced to spend eternity right there, hand-fed under that awful smile on his face.
♡ GOJO SATORU masterlist ♡ JUJUTSU KAISEN masterlist
#yandere jjk#yandere jujutsu kaisen#jujutsu kaisen smut#jujustu kaisen#jujutsu gojo#jujutsu kaisen#gojo smut#satoru gojo smut#gojo satoru smut#gojou satoru x reader#satoru gojo#gojo satoru#gojo x reader#gojo saturo#jjk gojo#yandere gojo x reader#yandere gojo satoru#yandere gojo#yandere satoru gojo#jjk smut#jujustu kaisen headcanons#gojo headcanons
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I just saw a Twitter post saying that Caitlyn realized Jinx had escaped somehow, and that's why she smiled at looking at hexgate design. Jinx knew that for the cycle to break, she had to walk away and Vi would never let this happen so it was easier for her to "die".
There isn't any funeral or so to Jinx in Zhaun, this implies that there wasn't a body, because if it had, we would see a scene of Vi or Ekko going to visit her final resting place.
We see the same airship/balloon that we saw in season 1. And I remember she said she wanted to travel in one of those. So either she talked to Sevika and Sevika helped her out and got her the airship, or it was Caitlyn.
It would mean so much if it was Caitlyn tho, because of her conversation with Vi about not letting go of Jinx even after she saved her life, and the conversation she had with Jinx. Plus the knowledge that both Caitlyn and Jinx had that Vi would never let Jinx go if she knew she was alive, and because of the implications surrounding Jinx crimes...they wouldn't have peace. Jinx would need to go to jail, Vi would let her and would fight against Caitlyn, Vi would break Jinx out, and shit would go on forever.
So just as Vi and Caitlyn made that plan in act2, Caitlyn and Jinx could have made this one.
Or is just as simple as Jinx survived, getting away in the last moment. As we see some pink light moving at shimmer speed at the time of the explosion, Warwick was crying and the flashback with Vander could mean that he manages to get back just to let her go and save her one last time. Then she stole some airship and walked away. Caitlyn realized but let it go and that's it.
The problem with this version is that this is something Caitlyn would def tell Vi. So, what if the reason Vi was so chill was that she knew Jinx had escaped but she understood that Jinx needed to walk away so that's why she won't go after her?
Idk. Anyway. Jinx is prob alive
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