#last nights episode was so good

[perigilpin]

[shima-draws]

I'm rewatching GF since the whole world seems to be into it right now (thank you Alex and the Book of Bill) and AGHHH I FORGOR about the body swap episode when the twins find the secret room and Stan picks up Ford's glasses and later we see him sitting on the couch looking at them wistfully...

Shut up shut UP that's NOT okay

[the-goopy-gaymer]

If Bullfrog has a million fans, then I am one of them. If Bullfrog has ten fans, then I am one of them. If Bullfrog has only one fan then that is me. If Bullfrog has no fans, then that means I am no longer on earth. If the world is against Bullfrog, then I am against the world.

[pickled-flowers]

Fat bear week anyone?

[ghostorbz]

ALIENS R REAL!!

[mischiefbuckley]

no one could ever make me hate Bobby like you have this man so excited to participate and compete over a haunted house at the fire station for kids and he’s all dressed up as a vampire doing the voice and narrating for the children as “Cap Dracula” as they enter the 118’s version of their own spooky haunted house with Hen, Chimney, Eddie and Buck also participating because Bobby is competitive and wants to be better than all the other firehouses and it gets ruined by Bobby’s pseudo son of all people yk ordering an actual dead body as decor and then he’s convinced he has a curse like again this show is something else I swear lmao

[hazelcallahan]

i'm scared of ending up alone. what about you?

[radiocity]

The L Word | S2E01

[buck-up-buck]

Canon Events that have happened over the three episodes that have me going INSANE (like, these actually happened and are not Fanon.)

Buck asked Tommy for a tour of Harbour, not because he wanted to consider learning to fly, or leave the 118, but soley because he wanted to hang out with Tommy.

Buck used Christopher for information on Tommy.

Buck pretended to suddenly be into Basketball so that he could go to the game, just because he knew Eddie and Tommy would be there.

MADDIE MOCKED BUCK ABOUT OPENLY HAVING A CRUSH ON EDDIE.

Buck body slammed Eddie while playing Basketball (honestly, I still cannot get over the fact that he YEETED THIS BOII).

Tommy got Buck's address from Eddie and chose to come around to apologise to Buck even though, TECHNICALLY, Buck was the one acting like a spoilt brat all episode.

BUCK WAS KISSED BY A MAN. SPECIFICALLY, BUCK WAS KISSED BY TOMMY. And then proceeded to be swept off his feet by this man and was left starstruck in his apartment, after Tommy openly communicated that he had to go to work and wasn't just kissing and bailing.

"I'm an Ally."... Need I say no more.

Buck acted like a totally fucking idiot on his first date with Tommy, and proceeded to have Tommy cut the date short because of how unready he seemed. WHICH BY THE WAY, TOMMY AGAIN COMMUNICATED SO BEAUTIFULLY WITH BUCK AND PROCEEDED TO STILL CALL THIS MAN ADORABLE. HE CALLED HIM ADORABLE FOR CRYING OUT LOUD.

Buck accidently outed himself to Maddie because he was doing a ramble ramble about his lil buck'ed up date.

Buck told Eddie he was on a date with Tommy, and Eddie proceeded to be the bestie of besties to Buck and told him, they all loved him anyways. HE USED THE WORDS. Bucks face in that scene will forever make my lil gay heart WEEP.

Buck told Eddie he couldn't stop thinking about the hot pilot that kissed him. CRYING.

Buck proceeded to grow the fuck up and apologised to Tommy, face to face, out in a public space, knowing full well that Tommy could have dropped his ass there and then, but still wanted to show him how sorry he was, and that he was, in fact, ready.

BUCK INVITED TOMMY TO BE HIS DATE TO THE MADNEY WEDDING DESPITE ONLY technically GOING ON TWO DATES. AND THEN TOMMY. SAID. YES. HE SAID YES. YES.

Buck also then invited Tommy to Chim's bachelor party, HELD HIS ARMS OPEN ACROSS THE ROOM READY FOR A HUG, told Tommy off for his outfit, showing off true Clipboard Buck form, AND THEN TOUCHED HIS PECK.

Eddie, the bestie of besties, got all sappya and jokey when he saw Tommy and Buck together.

Buck got all pouty when Tommy had to go to work, BUT TOLD HIM TO BE SAFE. HE SAID BE SAFE DAMNIT.

Buck got all goofy and smiley when he saw that Tommy had arrived at the hospital, MEANING, that he was most likely texting Tommy all day updating him on everything that was going on, even if Tommy couldn't respond while attending to the fire.

BUCK. CALLED. TOMMY. A. BEAST. HE SAID THIS CANONICALLY. ARE YOU JOKING. HE FULLY ATTACKED MY MAN, WHILE HE WAS COVERED IN SOOT AND SHIT, SNOGGED HIS FACE OFF IN A HOSPITAL WAITING ROOM, AND CALLED HIM A BEAST. I AM DECEASED.

Buck, the idiot that he is, proceeded to out himself, to his entire family, by coming back into the room, most likely 15 to 20 minutes after leaving, covered in soot because he had been uncontrollably making out with his hot pilot boyfriend.

Eddie, the bestie of besties, GOT SO FUCKING SMUG WHEN HE SAW BUCK AND TOMMY WALK BACK IN THAT ROOM. HE PULLED THE SAME FACE I PULL WHEN MY FRIENDS HAVE COME BACK FROM MAKING OUT WITH PEOPLE AND I AM HERE FOR IT. EDDIE YOU BESTIE SLAY SLAY SLAY.

Hen, the queen that she is, has most likely spoken to Karen about her suspicons of Buck's sexuality, and procceed to say ABOUT DAMN TIME. SHE KNEW THIS WHOLE TIME. HER GAYDAR IS ON FIRE. I LOVE HER.

Again, all of these events happened IN ACTUAL EPISODES, not in a fanfiction. I am FERAL over this. Bi!Buck is the best thing to ever happen to me.

Thank you for coming to my ted talk and if you don't ship BuckTommy, leave.

[dilfmas]

i feel like people forget that characters don’t always just like. fall in love instantly. like they can have genuine feelings and not be IN LOVE yet. like there are layers. no, neither kant or bison are IN LOVE with each other yet. that doesn’t make the feelings they do have any less real? it doesn’t make it less painful for kant to realize he’s actively falling for someone he also has to betray or for bison to know how suspicious kant is and also be actively falling for him. same goes for style and fadel, like no i don’t think either of them are IN LOVE yet… it doesn’t mean they’re not still interested? it doesn’t mean their feelings aren’t genuine, that they aren’t enjoying each others company? there IS a middle ground believe it or not. you have to fall in order to be in love - these characters are still in the falling stage

[msnihilist]

[thelolarahaii]

It's not...the aftermath that's special. It's about the process to get them there.

LUKE JAMES as EDMUND GAINES in "Them: The Scare"

[mulders-too-large-shirt]

s3 episode 12 thoughts

ha! a post at a different time than usual! you didn’t see this coming, did you? well i like to keep you guessing

do you hate bugs? if so, this may not be the episode for you!

(based on the poll i have running, i’m going to try putting a “read more” thingy on this post. please let me know if this enhances your experience. what a cruel thing to only think of 3 seasons in…)

disclaimer on the formatting of this blog aside, let us jump in, straight from the moments right before i clicked the play button.

okay, so last episode will be a hard act to follow, given that it was my new favorite episode. BUT i think i’ve seen that this episode is a fan favorite?? i think?? so we shall see…

trying to go in with no expectations at all. not even one. just let the story take me where it goes.

but i thought i did see something about this episode referring to a mulder ex?? not sure i can deal with that again at this point in my life. not after phoebe. still haunted by that arthur conan doyle thing.

it's bug time in massachusetts. learn some bug facts with this kindly looking fellow. 

i love academics who are really into things like bugs. i love when they love funny creatures. WAIT HE STEPPED ON IT!! that was cruel??? maybe he is not a kindly fellow after all…

okay, i THOUGHT this dude was teaching a class on science, but he’s an exterminator... LMAOOOOOO they got me with that gag

so he’s putting down a new pesticide to kill the cockroaches. always risky business, those pesticides.

he sprayed the bug with the stuff and then stomped on it and it seems like he started choking?? is he messing with some dangerous poison here??? pesticides scare me…. 

the bugs are pouring out of surfaces and onto him and it is making my skin craaaaawl!!!

oh, a cricket now graces our screen! a pleasant creature. on mulder’s windshield? he went up to massachusetts for the weekend! but not for family reasons. for alien reasons.

scully is cleaning her gun and talking to him on the phone while he looks up at the sky. it’s quite charming <3

“look scully, i know it’s not your inclination, but did you ever look up into the night sky and feel certain that not only was something up there, but it was looking down on you at the exact same moment, and was just as curious about you as you are about it?” <- ohhhh he’s waxing poetic. ohhh what does the massachusetts bring out in this man?

scully is going on about how she thinks the real fascinating truth is that life exists here on this planet at all, and uses the word “anti-darwinian”… and he asks what she is wearing??? she laughs at this 

(i actually really liked her little monologue here and would copy it down, but i want to see what happens next)

he references planet of the apes and they both understand it, which means they have both seen a movie that i have not. sad!

a bright light shines on him and he says he has to go, so he hangs up. way to freak her out!

it’s a cop. he asks what mulder is doing. “just sitting, thinking” LMAOOOO they hate to see a man who ponders

the cop asks for his ID after implying he is on drugs, and then is gagged when he pulls out his FBI badge. and then all of a sudden he’s a “sir”... okay. only getting respect AFTER the occupation reveal. not the most morally outstanding thing...

the cop asks why he has his windshield wipers on and he’s like oh, just knocking a bug off, and the officer reaches for his gun??? and asks if the bugs he is referring to were cockroaches. he’s like… maybe? or maybe a beetle?? “i’m not really good with bugs” LMAOOO

then the cop leaves when he says there is a roach attack. oh?

scully is trying to just enjoy a meal and some tv when he calls and says that she needs to get up here because “it appears that cockroaches are mortally attacking people”, to which she replies “i’m not going to ask you if you just said what i think you just said, because i know it’s what you just said”, which would also be my response to this information!

(she has flowers on her glass of water. it’s quite pretty)

anyway. bodies with roaches. (nicki voice) ROACHESSSS!

oh, they’re very scientific up there in this town, all the people who were victims/witnesses were expert scientists... hmm. any roach scientists?

the guy whose house was being exterminated says he sees cockroaches when he closes his eyes, and he can’t sleep!! that is very concerning.

scully says it might be an allergic reaction to roaches that killed this dude, and this seems to please mulder as an answer, or at least bide him enough time to let her stay the night at her place. and when the cop asks who was on the phone, he says “my drug dealer” <- hahahaha get his ass

in this next scene, i at first thought people were doing some science, but it seems these are teenagers that are doing drugs. and whatever it is has a cockroach crawling in it?

OHHHH OHHHH NO. A COCKROACH JUST CRAWLED INTO AN OPEN WOUND ON THIS KID'S HAND. OHHHH IS THIS GONNA BE A BODY HORROR EPISODE??? BLECKKK this was not what i was expecting after many jokes!! 

he’s scratching and scratching and i literally cannot look. i heard him yell “get them out of me” but i am already light headed and we shall leave it at this.

cut to scully cam. her dog is getting a bath!!! with anti-flea shampoo….. does the creature have bugs or is she just being very cautious? not sure if more bugs would be an auspicious sign. good to see the dog again, i’ve missed him. what a cute little fellow. he whines. 

of course her phone rings when she is covered in soap!!

mulder says she better get up there. the kid is dead. and there were very much drugs at the scene, but mystery drugs.

she says that sometimes people who are high can imagine bugs in their skin- it’s called ekbom’s syndrome. again, love when she knows this stuff. and he says that she is probably right, and she doesn’t really have to come up. “sorry to bother you”, he says, and she says “it’s no bother” into the phone with a smile. 

but the dog!!! he has run away!!! still covered in soap!! naughty little fellow.

back a the scene of the crime. a roach has been caught. mulder somehow squished it. but the exoskeleton was made of metal?? OH! his hand is bleeding!!!

GET HIS HANDS CLEAN NOW!!!

is this some sort of future cockroach that has developed advanced resistance to eradication efforts?? like the darwinian stuff scully was talking about earlier???

he is still bleeding. at the doctor. and the doctor wants to know what the hell is going on. mulder doesn’t know. and the sheriff asks the same thing!!! many are wondering.

doctor goes to the bathroom and a roach approaches. NO NO NO I SEE WHERE THIS IS GOING AND I HATE IT NOOOO. 

“i see the correlation, but just because i work for the federal government doesn’t mean i’m an expert on cockroaches” mulder!!!! what a way to speak of your coworkers! hahaha

oh!! someone has been doing experiments in the town!! this dude says killer bees were an accident, and maybe these cockroaches are something similar- is that true about the bees??? need to fact check. OH MY GOSH IT IS??? what the hell. what a scary world we live in.

so the doctor is dead. he was covered in cockroaches when he was found dead, but now they are gone? except for one on the sink. that one falls down the drain.

back to scully cam. she’s reading truman capote’s breakfast at tiffany’s!!! she picks up the phone with “who died now?” LMAOOO

she says it was probably a brain aneurysm that killed the doctor, and it looks like it was. cutscene to him jumping into the secret area.

scully at home, looking up cockroaches on a… laptop? with her glasses on <3 and eating ice cream right out of the carton. honestly queen shit!!! her hypothesis: new cockroach species…?

“mulder, you’re not thinking about trespassing onto government property again, are you?” she asks, while he is at the door LMAOOOO 

“i know that you’ve done it in the past” <- yeah, he is a repeat offender. her tone here was so funny, too. trying to gently talk him out of it.

“it’s too late, i’m already inside” HAHAHA

(deep resigned scully sigh) “well, what’s going on? what do you see?” this exchange says so much about them <3 if he's gonna get his ass in trouble, he at least better describe to her in great detail what is going on

he is giving her a full walk through of this place, which looks like a normal house except the moving walls. until the roaches burst through.

and someone turns a light on! he says he has to go. see, that is exactly when i would want someone to be on the phone with me, when a mysterious entrance is made.

so we see dr. berenbaum. i guess she was at home alone, but damn, they are really trying to show off her chest.

“what’s a woman like you doing in a place like this?” he asks. gag (and not in the slay kinda way, in the "please stop mulder, you're making me cringe" kinda way)

OHHH scully is still staring at the phone… is she contemplating or did he forget to hang up?? does she have to listen to all of this? another case of her being god's strongest soldier if she has to hear this.

and in the next scene, dr. berenbaum has buttoned her flannel. it is differently buttoned in the next cut.

WAIT. she’s talking about UFOs. she thinks they are really insect swarms. this seems like a trap to lure mulder into some trouble, by getting him distracted...

she’s saying something about loving insects. so now we get a REAL academic who loves bugs!

LMAOOOO the phone rings and he answers it only to say “not now”, ohhh he wants her bad. he says that he finds insects to be very interesting. LMAOOOOOO an absolute LIAR!! just after she said she loves bugs for being honest. mulder is not immune to lying to women to make them like him. a cardinal sin! just be yourself, man!

at a motel room, a cockroach is approaching another guy’s feet. and he’s scratching at himself and i see where it’s going and i’m NOT LOOKING. i can’t bear it. 

mulder waking up. in. a bed? did they hookup??? oh i don't need to imagine that.

no, seems he is by himself, in the motel. which is good. i don't need that kind of energy in my life. 

he opens his eyes and immediately calls scully. who was sleeping with the phone on her pillow to be there if he called again. AWWWW. she is so thoughtful.

she does not seem to be enjoying that the scientist is a woman, and also that her name is bambi, which like. okay, i get that. bambi is kinda wild as a name, lmaooo. she cannot believe it. no offense to any bambis reading this, you are deeply valued. he's babbling about bambi and bugs and her parents were both naturalists, and dude, shut upppp

“scully, can i confess something to you?” he asks

(scully is visibly cringing, with pain in her voice) “yeah sure, okay!” <- LMAOOOO she was prepared for the worst!!! but ready to try and be supportive no matter what!! that is friendship! this moment was sosososososo cute. she was bracing herself for the worst but still trying to be kind. she did NOT wanna hear about his antics with this bambi!! and i do not blame her!!!

he says “i hate insects”, and she tries to comfort him saying lots of people are afraid of them!!! because that is a good friend who sleeps next to the phone waiting for your call, even after you mysteriously hang up on her!!!

! MULDER LORE REVEAL ! he was terrified of a praying mantis as a child. they look like aliens. he was repulsed by the mysteries of the natural world. we can unpack that at another time.

he says that it “wasn’t a girly scream” that he let out as a child, and she asks if he was sure LMAOOOOO 

she’s so funny i SWEAR. they need to call more late at night/very early in the morning just to make fun of each other but also do their very best to support each other.

but! a loud screaming in the distance. he hangs up the phone again and she rolls her eyes. 

discovery: that the dude seen in the hotel earlier was covered in cockroaches. also, he is dead.

mulder at the scene with his JEANS ON, NO SHIRT, BELT UNBUCKLED????

wait. we need to unpack this. was he SLEEPING in jeans??????? holy fuck... we need to lock this man UP, that is CRAZY!

anyway, the cockroaches that were just on that guy's body are gone. so they just disappeared somehow. not as crazy as a man sleeping in jeans, but it is up there.

she’s getting her stuff to come up there now. and i like that we get to see into her place, her little kitty on the desk, her two giant bookshelves. maybe i tried to pause and read what was on there, any maybe i had no luck!

also, now she’s on the phone with him explaining the mysterious death, and he’s clothed. he must have saw the dead body and realized he had time to change.

mulder seems to think that this dude had a heart attack. and all of scully’s theories have seemed correct. but that doesn’t explain the metal exoskeletons, which he had NOT mentioned before, and leaves her gagged.

“mulder, i’m coming up there” “whatever”, he says, as he sneaks onto the ground, to catch a roach!!! petulant child of a man.

cut to bambi, analyzing the cockroaches. with mulder pressed veeeeery close to her face. and the cockroach is… hung? but they are actually robots??? so this robot cockroach has that as a design. interesting. 

turns out, a guy who makes bug robots lives in town. so mulder is off to visit. and we see a little one walk by!!! about the size of a roomba or small dog. mulder seems enchanted by it, following it in. it's a very cute little guy. i politely request 10 of them.

dr. ivanov is the fellow behind all this. they’re trying to make AI robots by making them bugs. interesting strategy. if only AI was used to make cute little dog-sized robot bugs in our age...

the robots are following mulder about. dr. ivanov says the bug robot likes him!!! aww

the goal of this research is that they want to send the bugs to space!!!! to explore alien civilizations! and that if aliens visit our planet, they will also be robots. if you think otherwise, you have been brainwashed by sci-fi. scalding hot takes coming from dr. ivanov here.

interesting to see two separate takes on what aliens/UFOs actually are in this episode from someone other than mulder.

these roomba or small dog sized bug robots are soooo cute, not at all like those real looking cockroaches.

ugh! i just realized they probably had to get a TON of roaches on set to film all this. and they were probably crawling about…. euGhHhh

he asks dr. ivanov to identify the bug legs. and dr. ivanov looks terrified. he says it is beyond his comprehension...??

and then a cockroach walks across the screen? it looks like it’s walking right on the camera. i had to replay to see if it was supposed to be walking along their faces, but no, it’s completely flat, right on you, the viewer’s screen, which i’m sure made a lot of people jump!!!

the grocery store is being looted for all things, even chocolate and pantyhose. someone crashes a car, and someone else slams into scully, who looks IMMENSELY displeased.

scully just wants a damn map, but one person is saying that roaches are eating people whole, then another person says they’re spreading ebola. the misinformation panic can produce!

she starts yelling in the convenience store, and people mostly calm down. queen of controlling the situation. until someone knocks over some candy that sort of kind of looks like roaches if you squint and the stampede resumes. 

LMAO SHE TAKES ONE OF THE CANDIES. 

dr. ivanov and mulder are drinking whisky??? okay, boys night i guess. he finds a real looking roach on the way out. and starts talking to it.

he brings it to bambi and she confirms it’s a real cockroach.

scully calls, saying this town is insane. and that she has a lead! the alternative fuel researcher brought various animal dungs in, which could have started an infestation. and she says “maybe you can confirm this with your dr. bambi” and there is a sort of venom in there that has me giggling. get his ass queen.

oh, and now he’s going on about aliens. she says he’s been in this town too long. 

HE BRINGS BAMBI TO THE INVESTIGATION??? he says to wait until it’s safe and he’s worried about the human element. DOES HE MEAN SCULLY?? or the researcher...

so poor bambi is just gonna sit in the car i'm crying

it’s the guy who was saying he was seeing cockroaches in his sleep!! and who found the first body, of the exterminator!!! he’s in there spraying stuff on a cockroach and it doesn’t do anything.

sure enough, cockroaches in his dung samples. mulder goes to touch it when this DUDE SHOOTS AT HIM?? his name is dr. eckerle. he says they’re following him. and that the bugs drive him crazy. 

scully rolls up and says “let me guess- bambi” and bambi says “fox told me to wait out here” FOX?? hearing his real name is always such a jumpscare. she loads her gun and says this is no place for an entomologist. OKAYYYY steal his girl!!!

back in the lab, dr. eckerle has mulder at gunpoint. he’s reciting bug facts to distract him.

mulder tries to explain that dr. eckerle hasn’t gone crazy, but then he brings the gun back up to his chest and asks mulder if he’s a cockroach, so. jury’s out on that one. 

scully in da research facility. she can’t find him. so she rings his phone. and dr. eckerle takes this as a sign that he is a cockroach!! he fires his gun in the facility full of methane gas and they have to run run run!! they make it outside and tell bambi to get down just in time.

agents are covered in exploded dung. deeply unfortunate.

and there had been 4 other fires that night!!! and a whole lot of automobile accidents, assaults, other such panic induced things. but no cockroach problems. 

the episode ends with another planet of the apes quote and bambi hitting it off with dr. ivanov.

scully observes all this and says “smart is sexy” LMAOOOOOOOO 

AND THAT THEIR CHILDREN MIGHT SAVE THE PLANET THE NEXT TIME DUNG EATING OUTER SPACE COCKROACH ROBOTS REACH THE PLANET. she is sooooo out of pocket!!!!!! but it was deserved.

he doesn’t seem to know what to say to this so he tells her she smells. and she seems taken aback LMAOOO

episode wrap up time. mulder edition. “the development of our cerebral cortex has been the greatest achievement of the evolutionary processes. big deal.” <- okay i’ve said lmao a lot, but that one got a real, genuine laugh out of me. ugh his dumb ass… love him so bad. 

he is typing and typing and we see his fish in the background. also he is eating something. that i really hope has no cockroaches.

he’s going on about the vastness of technology but then has to slap the computer to get it to work LMAOOOO

he’s calling humanity mindless and primitive and BAM cockroach looking thing on whatever it was he was eating. he gets around to smack it. and then he lands a great smack, with an FBI file. i paused in case it had any clues to various mysteries and the file number is “667386”, but i don’t think that’s actually relevant at all

we hear a cockroach chirp as the end credits roll

WELL! that was an interesting episode. it’s interesting how even an episode centering on mysterious cockroach deaths can be made funny. they leaned into the campy elements, which i enjoyed.

things on my mind, in no particular order: scully cleaning her gun while calling mulder, mulder talking in poems while watching the stars, how they quoted planet of the apes at the beginning and then when two other did it it was in an implied romance (hey listen, you can’t stereotype the bond between two academics sharing a niche interest into such basic categories as “romance” or “friendship”, but i call it as the narrative presents itself), doggy bath time, the intimacy of long distance phone calls in pajamas, scully sleeping with the phone on her pillow, scully reading breakfast at tiffany's, this man sleeping in jeans.

it’s always weird watching them flirt with people that aren’t each other. and i know the writers do that on PURPOSE but it’s so weird!! the thing you did to be purposefully weird is working!!! so i was wrong about my initial assumption i had seen based on posts crossing my dash, she was NOT a former romantic partner, but a current love interest that did not seem to really feel the same. she just loves bugs, man. can you blame a woman? is there any greater love than between a woman and her research?

but seeing scully lowkey kinda jealous was also making me laugh. i’m not a believer in the whole “men and women can’t be friends thing”, so i choose to interpret that she wasn’t thinking along those lines at first, but the way she clocked him as down bad for her that fast was soooo funny. the minute that first name came out it was game over. 

(i mean, maybe it could be interpreted less as jealously and more as friendly antagonism, but that wasn’t the vibe i was getting. she wanted the tea. and then cocked her gun in front of said bambi and implied she and her new scientist friend were sexy due to their smarts at the end. always watch your back because scully can and will flex in front of ur girl)

it was nice to have a silly one!!! a good old fashioned silly one. although the body horror really did jumpscare me because i was enjoying the silly and then WOAH. cockroach in the arm. i also just shivered thinking about bugs again. nasty nasty! i’m sorry bambi they are just crawly!!! i appreciate their value to science but i just watched that little critter crawl in an open wound so have some space for my discomfort!

i wonder if in the writer’s room, they allotted how many silly episodes are per season. or arc. i see people referring to “arcs” in my reblogs by specific names; you’ll have to fill me in on that measurement of episodes. because it sounds intriguing. but yeah, sometimes you need a lighter one, and it’s nice to get that. 

need a scully fancam to femininomenon….

[thetardisisnotourdivision]

Ok I find it incredibly amusing that people are still reblogging my "Susan Foreman is The One Who Waits" post because it's officially redundant, but I'm calling it now that I was right about Mrs Flood.

Like the “slightly bumbling autistic person who is sometimes accidentally sinister and knows stuff she shouldn't” is… that's the whole plot of An Unearthly Child. That's the exact reason why all this started in the first place - because Susan being like that weirded Ian and Barbara out so much that they followed her home and got kidnapped. Also, Susan was telepathic, so she could have sensed Sutekh's presence.

I'm also still convinced that she's Ruby's mother.

Interested to see where they go with this!

[boxwinebaddie]

uncle neen!!! welcome back omg i was so sad to see u disappear </3 hyh !!! i had a question i asked last time but i was wondering since ur rewriting ur fics, are u planning on posting them on tumblr? or on ao3? pls be kind to urself too<33

good MORNING, lovie!!!!~ <3 c':

( or whatever time it is, where you are at the moment! )

i'm very excited to announce that you are my very FIRST new ask message on my brand new blog!

( teri is my first follower; ly ter. <33 o//3//o )

***long overdue UN ramble-bramble under the cut. xx

i /do/ miss my six hundred bajillion ask memes and am mourning the loss of all my online creations and great joys as a deranged southpark fanfiction author and the legacy i built with my tiny, gay weird hands

( i will go into it another time, but i had a very, very frightening bipolar episode surrounding my blog and my role on here as a writer, friend and mentor to you all, deleted all my things in a horrible panic, was able to recover them...but in the -- what i hope is the *very last* -- after shock of my episode...i got very scared, very sad and deleted both my dearly treasured and beloved, beautifully cult followed by many of you and other ghosts of sp style fanatics past ao3 account**

**( with peppermint on it at 13k likes which...oh my god, please be gentle with me, that was a very, very hard blow and rough realization for me and i am sorry to everyone who loved that fanfiction and wanted to go back and read it for posperity and personal comfort...i miss her too; rest in peace, pep, my first born. my sweet girl. </3 )

...and most tragically of all, i deleted my tumblr blog, with over one hundred pages of carefully curated content surrounding my sp aus, your lovely, insightful and thoughtful questions and inquiries, also typed with your tiny, weird gay hands answered, in turn, with mine, torched the ev. of those memories in the final blast and lost my window into your world through that medium...

...which is literally heartbreaking to me, because more than even my silly fanfictions or my blog, what i loved to do, was talk to all of you and read your wonderful messages each day and remind myself of why i should be here and continue to do what i do. </333 :'''c

BUT! my darlings, as ravenstan would say, 'it's always darkest before crimson dawn', for the very first time in several weeks ( which, i fear, and i was, full of fear and horrible self loathing/dread every waking and nightmarish moment ), last night, i cried for a very, very, very, long time, held myself together in the broken places -- told myself and the girl i was that i loved her and i was going to take care of us and be brave -- and broke the fever ( a little off key like jersey kyle, but very lovely nonetheless; love you tone deaf king. x my sboyf. )

today, i woke up this morning and slept...PEACEFULLY and woke up PERFECTLY HAPPY AND RESTED...

AND SMILED. QUITE. WIDE!!!!~ :D

and that is a baby step, but it is a step in the right direction and also almost wanted to make me weep like a baby again because i literally have not felt happy or like i do not hate myself for like, i shit you not, over like 15-20 days...it was frightening and fucking horrible! SLAY!

nevertheless ( or the most, finally ) i am excited to welcome in a new era/year of change on my blog and within myself; which is an era of peppermint flavored 'hope i'm healing' in a delicious rem(ember) font.

unfortunately, because i nuked my ao3 account, i do not currently one atm, but am in the process of recovering it.

( i'm not condoning any kind of rude/uncivilized behavior bc people are allowed to do anything they want -- but i'd really like to get my user back and would appreciate it a lot if no one used it to create another ao3 account just because it would be confusing for my readers and disheartening to me to not be boxwinebaddie anymore. )

until then, i will be writing/drafting rem(ember) in my messy google docs, am storyboarding everything to the best of my ability ( which is not perfect, but nothing is -- except stan and kyle to each other -- but god loves a trier, which is why he hates me: i prefer hell where it's drier -- that way my girlfail guylinea will not run. xx )

KALE SEITAN! ;)

posting little snippets of it on here for all of you, probably put it here on my tumblr and post it up to ao3 if i can regain my account/one in general ( i am a little worried that because of how long it's been, the loss of all my followers and, what i assume, is a decreased public or tiktok generated interest in sp, it will do poorly; rip </3 )

-- but the point is...that i want to start doing stuff for myself now. and not because i think i should or create unnecessary stress/sadness surrounding my strength or weakness as a writer or person ( or like, beat the living shit out of myself every single day anymore )...

...so i am writing it slowly, carefully, synthesizing all the info i gathered from over a year of answering your questions ( which helped me develop my sp au styles and their worlds into the lovely, seemingly breathing paper machslayed things they are now ), am going to write the fanfiction i always/wanted/ to write ( i’ve always wanted to rewrite RM, but was so busy and overwhelmed with my blog/my irl stuff that i couldn't )

and i'm calling it...

<3

p.s. ( i love you ): i am going to give my grandmother a copy of the first chapter of peppermint for christmas because i wanted to do something special/sentimental for her and secretly push the gay middle school style agenda ( she is actually very woke and thought my uncle might be gay for a while when he was younger, haha xx ), but i want to give them different names, so that on the off chance it gets passed off to my mom, my dad or manages to travel by world of mouth ( my grandma has a tendency to gab, but i love her a lot ) that it can't specifically be traced back to my dead ao3 or my blog.

so if any one has any ideas for silly interesting names i could give my sons, names for other characters or south park in gen. hit me up! <33

thank you for your interest in my work -- and in me, in general. i love you all dearly, i hope you heal ( i know you will ) and smile, pendejos because got a lot coming up on that crimson dawn and a lot of crazy shit coming down on that *jersey i won't say i'm in luh megara vc*

~SCHARLET sLUt~

cheers! mazel! ;) xx

-uncle nina, in her healing era <3

[lilacerull0]

i would call my dad to apologise, but knowing him it would just hurt him unnecessarily to be reminded of that because he's not really good with bluntness which is what caused this whole thing and the other issue is that i know i will impulsively act like this many times in the future, so i guess the best thing i can do is continue to be as kind to him as i can be