#kos meta

[pencildragons]

thinking about how gideon understands wake's conversation with john so she must have been speaking her oppressor's language to her oppressor. thinking about how wake's full name is italicised, a literary convention indicative of foreign words. thinking about whether wake even knows the meaning of her name at all or if it is just about keeping it alive at this point. thinking about if she knows any of the destroyed languages of the planet that her ancestors escaped ten thousand years ago before they were erased entirely. thinking about wake and how two thirds of her name is derived from anglo/western culture just so the devastating impact on indigenous people of the erasure of their traditional knowledge and culture could be contextualised in a way muir's (predominantly) white, anglo/western audience could understand. thinking about wake and how she was angry enough at the imperial systems of power she spent her whole life fighting against to exist as a ghost for twenty years after the fact of her death. thinking about how all augustine offers her efforts twenty years after the fact of her death is belittlement of her people and a toast. thinking about [a giant shephard's crook emerges from the wings and yanks me sidestage]

[skania]

Oshi no Ko Chapter 154 Thoughts - Or the many many parallels between Ai/Kamiki and Akane/Aqua

In my post about last chapter, I listed a number of parallels showing that the way Kamiki felt about Ai is very reminiscent of the way Aqua felt about Akane.

I also said:

if Aka pulls that, then that would confirm that all of these parallels are very much intentional.

And what did Aka pull this chapter?

To top it off, now it isn't only Kamiki's feelings that parallel Aqua's. Ai's feelings are very much like Akane's, to the point that she nearly quotes her word for word at times 😭

I'll start chronologically because the amount of parallels is just insane. To keep this short, I won't bring up the Kamiki/Aqua parallels since I already went over those here. I'll just focus on Ai!

Ai didn't want to break up with Kamiki, but she did it because she feared that she and her children would be burdens to him, who was almost on the verge of breaking due to the weight of life.

Does that ring any bells?

Akane didn't want to break up with Aqua, but she was willing to do so because she feared that she and their fake relationship were burdening him by worsening the weight of his guilt.

Ai wanted to stay with Kamiki forever, just like Akane with Aqua.

Ai wanted to carry Kamiki's burden and walk into the future with him, just like Akane with Aqua.

Ai didn't know what loving someone felt like, but Kamiki was the first time she felt she wanted to love someone that way. Akane didn't know what loving someone that way felt like, either. Aqua was her first.

Most importantly:

Ai wanted to save Kamiki, just like Akane wants to save Aqua. While it was translated as "help" in English, in Japanese Ai uses the exact same verb as Akane when she says that she wants to "save" Aqua.

Even their expressions when thinking about their wish are similar 😭

And the thing is that — technically, logically — none of this can be a coincidence, because this is a fictional story and Aka is nearly using copy-pasting to stablish these parallels. But since this is Aka we're talking about, whether this will lead anywhere or turn out to be just bait remains to be seen lol

I feel like Ai isn't only paralleling Akane this chapter though, it's also possible to establish parallels between her and Aqua. Namely, Aqua also broke up with Akane to protect her, Aqua didn't understand what love was and he showed that he wanted to love Akane despite it.

Plus, when Aqua broke up with Akane to protect her, he did so in a way that would deliberately paint him in a bad light — just like Ai with Kamiki.

I'd also like to point out that in this chapter, Ai's feelings are described as, well, "Ai" 愛. In Japan, "Ai" 愛 is the strongest form of love, which can be either platonic or romantic. This is very relevant, because by making Ai's feelings for Kamiki so strikingly similar to Akane's for Aqua, Aka has essentially confirmed strongly implied that the kind of love Akane feels for Aqua is "Ai" 愛, too.

And Ai's "Ai" 愛 was romantic.

For those who aren't familiar with the concept of "Ai" in Japan, I feel like this post explains it very well:

愛 (Ai): sacrificial, unconditional, love for the other person's sake (often parallels the Greek agape, but can extend into philos as sawa mentions) 恋 (Koi): selfish, conditional, love for one's own sake (often parallels the Greek eros) While both can be used for romantic love, you cannot simply swap out one for the other. The contrast between the two shows up clearly in the したい forms of 愛する and 恋をする: 愛(Ai)したい I want to love [someone in a deep, unconditional way] 恋(Koi)がしたい I want to [fall in] love [with someone and experience the "high" of being in love]

If you ask me, the contrast between those two types of love perfectly exemplifies the difference with the way Akane's and Kana's feelings are being written. Coincidentally, Kana herself described her feelings as 恋 (Koi) in Chapter 150 lol

So considering all of this, I'm having the hardest time not seeing Kamiki and Ai as a sort of "failed" Aqua and Akane. Kamiki and Ai were too broken, and neither could handle their relationship in a healthy way despite their best intentions and how much they loved each other. Kamiki was too dependant on her, Ai broke up with him in the clumsiest way possible and Kamiki lashed out in a selfish, tragic way.

I'd argue that despite their mishaps, Aqua and Akane have already shown that they're healthier than Kamiki and Ai were. Even when he was at his lowest, Aqua was self-aware and did his best to not depend on Akane too much. When he faltered, Akane reminded him that it's important that they remain independent so they can have a healthy relationship.

Which takes me to something I think is very important:

Ai thought that Kamiki would be fine without her, but she was wrong. If she had been right, then maybe she would be alive today and she and Kamiki would've gotten back together later down the line.

I'm sure that Akane, too, thinks that Aqua will be fine without her. Aqua most definitely thinks the same thing about Akane.

And for them to be able to have a healthy relationship, it's important for them to be right. They need to be able to be fine without the other, and as of now, it seems like Aqua is finally making progress in that regard.

But what about being happier? Akane was at her happiest when she was with Aqua, and according to Aqua himself, it was the same for him. If we forget all the recent fiascos for a second and entertain the thought of Akane and Aqua once again, I feel like this should be the biggest factor into whether or not they get back together.

After all, if they get back together it shouldn't be because Aqua can't function without Akane. It should be because he wants to be with her (and she with him). So if Aka were to be a good writer allow them to find their way back to each other, this time spent apart could be crucial to let them restart on a healthy base.

But I digress! 😂 Instead of getting ahead of myself, I just want to enjoy the fact that these parallels are right there for everyone to see. At least no matter what happens, we now pretty much have confirmation that the way Aka wrote Aqua and Akane was both, romantic and the strongest form of love.

As for the plot, the fact that Ai's wish was this clear kind of opens an entire can of worms questions-wise. Moreover, I feel like if telling Kamiki that Ai loved him was Aqua's revenge plan all along, things like these would make very little sense in retrospective:

So for the sake of logic, I'm inclined to believe that Aqua, who didn't know what love was and who held a grudge against Kamiki, may have wanted to believe that Ai truly couldn't love Kamiki. He may have desperately wanted to believe that Ai was saying the truth, because otherwise taking revenge against Kamiki would mean going against Ai's wishes.

I feel like Aqua originally misinterpreting Ai's words is supported by the fact that even during the movie recording, Aqua was shown to not understand Ai.

So, what changed his mind? What made him finally realize that Ruby's portrayal was right and that Ai truly did love Kamiki?

Plus, Aqua has had that DVD for years now, which means that nothing was stopping him from realizing that Akane herself was echoing Ai's feelings for Kamiki throughout their relationship.

But I better stop myself right here, because if I start theorizing about this there will be no end to it. The possibilities are endless, so I'd rather just wait and let Aka either pleasantly surprise like he did this chapter me or continue to disappoint me as he is prone to do 😂

edit;

I just realized there are even more parallels when you get down to it. I mentioned before in my Chapter 97 post that during the phone-call that ultimately leads to their break-up, Aqua and Akane are like two ships in the night. They both want the same thing (to stay together), but in her haste to help him, Akane makes a choice that leads to their separation.

The same thing happens with Ai and Kamiki. They both want the same thing (to stay together), but in her haste to not burden him, Ai chooses to walk away from him.

Ai doesn't understand her own love and is thus unable to understand the extent of Kamiki's. She makes the mistake of thinking that the best way to save Kamiki is to not impose more burdens on him, when all he wanted was to stay with her. I'd argue something very similar happened with Akane. She made the mistake of thinking that the best way to help Aqua was to carry out his revenge for him, when all Aqua wanted from her was to remain by her side.

[penguinkyun]

theres been a running theme of Ai and hands in particular. Hands reaching out to her, hands enclosing her like a caught rabbit, hands trying desperately to grab onto and hold the final remnants of her (and of Ai too, never managing to reach out and fully grasp onto the other person, no matter how hard she tried)

hands forever reaching out to her, but they never could because there was always some sort of barrier between them, whether it was jealousy, idolisation or just plain refusal to understand her. when its other people talking about her, Ai is drawn in the spotlight, far away from her peers and alone with her face never turned to the viewer

and the only time the hands connect, is when her words are finally heard and she is understood. but Ai is dead and its much too late for it to mean anything but despair and grief. the hands are still separated by time.

[madfanatic]

Kirby and their friends asking for candies in a nice and a lovely halloween day 🎃

You can buy a full quality version of this ilustration! (and also a a PDF version to print it as a poster) right here on my Ko-Fi!!!

[phantomchick]

The ending of Oshi no Ko vs The beginning (chapter 166 vs 10)

So as you can see, there's clear evidence of intentional parallels happening here. This is the aftermath of Ai's death that mirrors the aftermath of Aqua's. Aka already claimed to have the ending planned well in advance months ago so it's not a big surprise that even the ending panels of the first (not counting the prologue) and last chapters match.

And yet Oshi no Ko still falls flat despite fulfilling its promise of a revenge-tragedy.

I think the biggest problem it has is the way the last chapter tells us instead of shows us as chapter 10 did.

Yes chapter 10 also used narrative text boxes a lot, but I argue that the effect then was much more immersive.

With them being used with precision to move us through a time skip with only the most necessary information about the fall out for the characters, even the distance had the effect of doing characterisation work with Aqua describing in a narrative text box how the policemen hid the scene from Ruby but Aqua felt his mother's body going cold beneath him as they arrived - this use of the text boxes casual tone over child Aqua sitting in his dead mother's lap gave a sense of disassociation and shock to the scene.

Even the textboxes turning black to mirror Aqua's dark emotions concerning his revenge as the star in his eye turned black showed how much attention was being paid to their use.

Ruby.

Ruby felt much more real in chapter 10, her rant about the internet's callous response to Ai's murder felt real and emotionally charged. In comparison, for all she's the main subject of the last chapter, she feels like a 2d cut out of herself, barely in there for all we see her struggling through Akane's observant gaze.

She expresses her motivation to be an idol despite hardship by acknowledging that Aqua's right about idolwork being difficult and cruel but reminding him that despite the darkside of the entertainment industry, their mother 'shone' very brightly. The talk about how Ruby shines more the darker things get and how this is a good thing because it reaches out to people trapped in darkness of their own (just like her when she was a terminally ill cancer patient) is clearly meant to echo this idea.

Frankly it fails.

Ruby feels hollow.

To the point where we barely get any insight into Ruby's real feelings at all or any emotional connection with her in comparison, by 166 it's genuinely unclear whether or not she's lying even to the portrait of her dead family when she's 'alone' on her way out the door.

We don't see a conversation between her and her adoptive mother about Aqua, we don't see her talking to Akane at all. We see her grief and her success from a deified distance, just like the fans do. And it alienates us from the character.

Lies are love and she has two stars in her eyes. Just like her mother did.

I think this more than anything condemns the idol industry, she has to keep lying even to herself about her job being fun because otherwise what was all that pain and suffering and loss for?

Aqua died in a murder-suicide (shout out to Taiki for experiencing a loved one doing this twice, poor guy) to give his little sister success in a job that she has to get up at 5.30 for, devote her entire youth to and will have to quit in less than a decade. It has to matter, that she provides escapism for people who are suffering like she did, but it doesn't change the grim reality of her exploitation.

I think the lack of dialogue in the final chapter and the loss of voice for Ruby in the last few arcs mirrors the loss of agency she experiences as she becomes the ultimate idol, everyone's star.

But that doesn't change the fact that from a reader perspective it's just bad writing. Aka failed to carry his audience with him to the finish line and his messages about the idol industry were blurred by the rushed plot after the movie arc began.

If it weren't for Mengo's art hard carrying the clumsily executed story, I can honestly say that I don't think many would have read this manga all the way to the end.

[chaos0pikachu]

Is BL Being Overly Influenced by Modern Western Romance Tropes?

Short answer: No. anyways, in the following essay I will explain that James Cameron is a weeb...

(okay fine~~ lets actually do this)

TLDR: discussing what media globalization is, how fandom can distill it down to only American/European cinema, showcasing how a lot of current BL is influenced by countries within it's own proximity and NOT "the west" but each other, also James Cameron is still a weeb

I had seen a post that basically proposited that BL was being influenced by modern western romance tropes and had used things like omegaverse and mafia settings as an example. I found this, in a word, fucking annoying (oh, two words I guess) because it's micro-xenophobic to me.

It positions western - and really what we mean by this is American/European countries, we're not talking about South American countries are we? - cinema as the central breadbasket of all cinema in and of itself. Inherently, all following cinema must be in some way, shape, or form, influenced by American/European standards, and as such America/European countries are directly responsible for cinema everywhere else, and these places - namely non-white countries - do not influence each other, nor have their own histories in regards to storytelling or cinema and do not, in turn, also influence American/European film making either.

Now like, do I think all of that~~ is intentionally malicious thinking on behalf of folks in fandom? No, so chill out.

I do, however, think a lot of it is birthed from simple ignorance and growing up in an environment where ~The West~ is propagated to be central, individual, and exceptional as opposed to the monolith of "Asia" - by which we mean China, Korea, Japan don't we? How often in discussions of Asian countries is Iran, India, or Saudi Arabia brought up even tho they are all Asian countries? - or the monolith that is South America - in which some folks might believe regions like the Caribbean and/or Central America belong to, but nope there both North America.

Anyway, what we're talking about here is the concept of "media globalization":

"The production, distribution, and consumption of media products on a global scale, facilitating the exchange and diffusion of ideas cross-culturally." (source)

"The media industry is, in many ways, perfect for globalization, or the spread of global trade without regard for traditional political borders. [...] the low marginal costs of media mean that reaching a wider market creates much larger profit margins for media companies. [...] Media is largely a cultural product, and the transfer of such a product is likely to have an influence on the recipient’s culture." (source)

Typically when I see fandom discussing what falls under MG the topic is usually focused on how "the west" is influencing Thai/Korean/Chinese/Japanese media.

Enter, Pit Babe.

Surely Pit Babe was influenced by Supernatural right? Omegaverse is huge in the west - love it, hate it, meh it - it originated in the west - specifically via Supernatural after all.

Nah.

Omegaverse has been popular in Japan and China for almost a decade, if not longer. The earliest omegaverse manga I can think of is Pendulum: Juujin Omegaverse by Hana Hasumi which was released in 2015, almost a decade ago.

(what if you added furries into omegaverse? WHAT IF?? - Japan)

There's countless popular omegaverse manga too, and the dynamics only moderately resemble the ones we're familiar with in the west. Juujin is part omegaverse and part furry/beastmen - the alphas are all beastmen the omegas are humans - while something like Ookami-kun Is Not Scary only slightly resembles omegaverse dynamics as a hybrid series - beastmen are really popular in Japan in part b/c of historical mythology (you see the combination of romantic Beastmen and Japanese culture & folklore in Mamoru Hosoda's work The Boy and the Beast and Wolf Children).

Megumi & Tsugumi (2018) is so popular they're an official English edition published by VIZ's imprint SuBlime and that's a straight up omegaverse story.

(look at the omega symbol on the cover loud and proud baby)

So if Pit Babe was influenced by anything, it certainly wasn't "the west" it was Japan, Korea and China. Because those countries have a thriving omegaverse sub-genre going and have had such for 10 plus years now. Supernatural is popular in Japan, yes, and that may be where Japan and Japanese fans originally found omegaverse as a fictional sub-genre.

HOWEVER

Japanese fans took the sub-genre, bent it, played with it, and evolved it into their own thing. As such, other countries in their proximity, like Thailand, China, and Korea who read BL and GL manga, found it and were like "hey, we wanna play too!"

(is that an omegaverse yuri novel I spy?? yes, yes it is)

When I watched the Red Peafowl trailer, it had more in common with Kinnporsche, History: Trapped, along with films and shows like: Jet Li's The Enforcer, and Fist of Legend, Donnie Yen's Flash Point, Raging Fire, and Kung Fu Jungle, Han Dong-wook's The Worst of Evil, Kim Jin-Min's My Name, Lee Chung-hyeon's The Ballerina, Baik's Believer & Believer 2, Yoshie Kaoruhara's KeixYaku, popular Don Lee films The Gangster, the Cop and the Devil and Unstoppable alongside BL manga like Honto Yajuu and Bi No Isu (probably one of the most well known yazuka manga to date).

Like, we're seeing a rise in mafia based BLs and people think that's because of "western influence" and not the absolute insane success of kinnporsche??? Especially in countries like China, Korea, Taiwan, Philippines and other Asian countries???

Mafia films and gang shows aren't even that popular here in America/Europe; don't get me wrong, they still get made and exist, but the last full length film was The Irishman which did not make it's budget back, and while Power is still on-going it's not a smash hit either. The heyday of Breaking Bad, The Sopranos, The Wire, Goodfellas, and Scarface are long gone. And if you've watched any those shows or films they have very little in common with Kei x Yaku, Kinnporsche, or Red Peafowl in tone, or style.

(who knew martin just wanted to make his al pacino/robert de niro fanfic come to life all these years?)

Another example, The Sign, which is clearly taking inspiration from Chinese costume dramas: Ashes of Love, Fairy and Devil, White Snake (and it's many adaptions), Guardian, & Ying Yang Master Dream of Eternity. Alongside Hong Kong and Korean cop and romance shows like Tale of the Nine-Tailed, Hotel Del Luna, Director Who Buys Me Dinner, First Love, Again, and previously mentioned cop dramas.

Like, I know y'all don't think Twins is influenced by, what, American sports classic Angels in the Outfield?? Gridiron Gang?? Rocky?? Nah that shit is inspired by the popularity of sports manga like Haikyuu!!, Slam Dunk, Prince of Tennis (which even has a Chinese drama adaption), and the like. And also probably History 2, & Not Me but I'm like 87% sure Twins is just Haikyuu fanfic.

So like, does this mean that there's NO history in which American and European cinema influenced these countries? What, no, obviously that's not true, American/European totally have had media influence on countries like Korea, Japan, etc.

Astro Boy by Osamu Tezuka considered "the father of manga" was inspired by Walt Disney's work on Bambi. Another more recent and prominent example is director Yeon Sang-ho and his film Train to Busan.

"And it was Snyder’s movie [Dawn of the Dead, 2004], not the 1978 original, that filmmaker Yeon Sang-ho recalled as his first encounter with the undead. “That was when I started my interest in zombies,” Yeon said, in an email interview through a translator from South Korea. Even today, he added, “it’s the most memorable and intense zombie movie I’ve ever seen.”" (source)

HOWEVER, the global influence doesn't stop there. It's not a one-way street. Yeon Sang-Ho was inspired by Zack Synder's Dawn of the Dead, a remake of George Romero's own work, but Yeon Sang-Ho's work has inspired countless Korean film makers to make their own zombie media; following Train to Busan there's been: Kingdom (2019 - current), All of Us Are Dead (2022), Zombie Detective (2020), Zombieverse (2023), Alive (2020), Rampant (2018).

And hey, wouldn't you know it now we're starting to see more zombie media coming out of places like Japan (Zom 100 the manga, movie, and anime) and High School of the Dead.

Do you know what Domundi's series Zombivor (2023, pilot trailer only) reminds me of? It's NOT The Walking Dead (which is the only relevant zombie media America has created in the last decade) it's Korea's All of Us Are Dead (2022). Comparing the trailers, the settings, the tone, it's clear where Zombivor is pulling inspiration from: Korean zombie cinema. NOT American zombie cinema.

In fact a lot of Domundi's shows - Cutie Pie, Middleman's Love, Naughty Babe, Bed Friend - are all very clearly inspired by Korean filmmaking, specifically that of romantic kdramas from the 2016 - 2020 era. Not always in story, but rather in technique.

This is media globalization. It's not simply ~The West~ influencing non-American/European countries but countries who are often more close in terms of: proximity, culture, and trade are going to have more influence on each other.

It is far more likely that Aoftion (Naughty Babe, Cutie Pie, Zombivor) was influenced by watching Train to Busan, All of Us Are Dead, and other Korean zombie shows and films than a single episode of Walking Dead.

My point isn't that this goes one way only, but rather it is very literally a global thing. This includes American and European film makers being influenced by non-American and European cinema.

Martin Scorsese, Steven Spielberg, Darren Aronofsky, Christopher Nolan, the Wachowski sisters, George Lucas and James Cameron have all been influenced by Japanese film making, especially the works of Akira Kurosawa, Satoshi Kon, and Mamoru Oshii.

John Wick's entire gun-fu sub-genre is heavily influenced by classic Hong Kong action films, specifically John Woo films. Legend of Korra, The Boondocks, Voltron, Young Justice, My Adventures with Superman are all obviously inspired by Japanese anime but animated by a Korean animation studio (Studio Mir). Beyond that, the rise in adult animated dramas like Castlevania, Critical Role Vox Machina, and Invincible to name a few are very clearly taking inspiration from anime in terms of style. The weebs that were watching Adult Swim's Inuyasha, Bleach, and Dragon Ball Z have grown up and are now working in Hollywood.

Okay so like, what's the point of all this? What's the issue? Since American/European cinema does influence et all cinema does any of this really matter?

YES.

I take contention with this line of thinking because it centers "the west" and our supposed individual importance way to much. Declaring definitively that "BL is being influenced by western tropes" and then including tropes, narratives, and film making styles that aren't inherently western and actually have major roots in the cinema of various Asian countries, removes the existence of individual history these countries have which are rich, varied, and nuanced. It removes the "global" part of globalization by declaring "the globe" is really just America and Europe.

It distills these countries down to static places that only exist when American/European audiences discover them.

BL doesn't exist in a vacuum you can trace the development of Korean BL to the development of Korean het dramas almost to a T. You can also trace their development to the queer history of each country and how Thailand interacts culturally with China, Japan, Korea, etc and vice versa. It also ignores the history of these countries influencing American cinema as well. Don't mistake "the globe" for only your sphere of experience.

Anyway James Cameron is a damn weeb y'all have a good night.

Check out other posts in the series:

Film Making? In My BL? - The Sign ep01 Edition | Aspect Ratio in Love for Love's Sake | Cinematography in My BL - Our Skyy2 vs kinnporsche, 2gether vs semantic error, 1000 Stars vs The Sign | How The Sign Uses CGI | Is BL Being Overly Influenced by Modern Western Romance Tropes?

[like these posts? drop me a couple pennies on ko-fi]

[aihoshiino]

I've been thinking a lot lately about the idea of "Dark/Evil/Black Hoshigan/etc" Ai lately - not for any real particular reason, just because as a fixation of the fandom, I've always been weirdly fascinated by people's eagerness to leap to it as an assumption of her character despite it being in such obvious conflict with the text. I think a lot of this comes from, as I've said before, people seeing Ai herself and other characters describe her as a 'liar' and instantly concluding that her entire front-facing personality is an entirely fabricated act with no footholds in sincerity or authenticity. And it's baffling to me because Ai really isn't that complicated or dramatic as a 'liar' character - she's just doing her best to be liked by other people because she's so desperate to connect with them and she hates herself so much that the only way she can imagine doing so is editing every singe potentially objectionable part of her personality out of her worksona lol.

And the thing is, I don't even necessarily hate the idea of exploring BH/Dark Ai! I've done it myself before in RP and other stuff and I think it's a suuuuuper fascinating concept. It's just that the way I see it done in fanworks and fan theories is always kind of… shallow? It's Disney Twist Villain tier - it's not about building on and exploring the character that exists in the text, it just replaces her with an entirely different one and goes "isn't it crazy that she was there all along". And that's just not as fun to me!

The thing about dark/manipulative/'evil' Ai is that it's unavoidably, inherently OOC because she doesn't really have a malicious bone in her body. If it's already out of character behaviour, why not lean into it and make the OOCness part of the premise? Why not really examine just how fucking miserable Ai would need to be to finally give up all hope and go down this path?

One of the most important things about Ai is that because she just naturally struggles with empathy as a result of her neurodivergence and because she has so consistently been mistreated her whole life, her kindness and her warmth and compassion are to a degree things she actively chooses to put out into the world. Because she wants to love other people. She wants to sincerely form connections with them and be with them. So, in a situation where she comes to believe that her end goal of loving and being being loved as a real human is impossible, it's not really that hard for me to imagine her deciding like. well okay. If people don't want a human being, why should she try?

Becoming an idol is all people want from her. That's what makes people happy. So if that's how it is, the best thing for everyone is for her to ruthlessly dedicate herself to it no matter how many things she has to break in the process.

They asked for something that "wasn't human", after all. So that's exactly what they'll get.

[siriuslyobsessedwithfiction]

I cannot take that message from Shadow and Bone trilogy "All power corrupts and absolute power corrupts absolutely" seriously for three reasons:

It's used to demean and shame having any kind of power, no matter how well it's used. And it's directed to an oppressed minority. Basically, the message is that it's better to sit around and do nothing rather than take matters into your own hands and fight back for liberation of your people, even if it risks your own corruption.

The author later somewhat realizes her mistake and goes back on her words. But her favoritism is clear and while one character is shamed and punished for reaching for "too much power", the other is rewarded for it.

Everytime I read that quote, I remember this absolute gem of a scene from Roger Zelazny's The Chronicles of Amber novel series. The proof that adult/high fantasy does it better than YA (not always though):

Flora pursed her lips and let go of us: "Now you see what absolute monarchy is. This is how power corrupts, debauches a man."

"I was debauched and corrupted long before I had power" - Random responded cooly. "You can leave us now, sister."

[lifeismarvelous]

Woe, major special interests be upon ye

[rascheln]

The thing I find both hilarious and infuriating about Oshi no Ko is actually the adults and how they know Aqua is scheming and using and manipulating the girls and all they do is essentially just stand by and watch and simply tell him "you know that's wrong" without actually doing anything about it at best or helping him at worst.

Miyako seems to have made it pretty clear that while she thinks of Ruby as her daughter, the same can't be said for Aqua. She acts like his legal guardian first and foremost, but apart from telling him off for manipulating the girls, she doesn't do any actual parenting. Maybe that's because she thinks Aqua needs to make his own mistakes or that she can't control him anyways, but it still makes her an onlooker to his actions. (Though to be fair, due to her lack of involvement with him she also misses a lot of the shit he pulls and probably thinks he's still relatively harmless. It also doesn't help that he acts much more like an adult and has done his best to hide his trauma, which makes him sort of invisible as a 'problem child.')

Mem-cho in a way tries to subtly get involved when she realizes both Akane and Kana have feelings for Aqua and that he's using both of them. Her conflict is over the feelings of her friends, though, and so she tries to slightly counteract Aqua by helping both girls... But that means she spreads herself too thin. She can't have it both ways, for one girl to be happy the other is going to be miserable and she doesn't have enough of a close relationship and access to Aqua to influence him in a meaningful way.

At the same time, she hides a lot of this drama from both Kana and Akane. She can't tell either of them what she knows about the other, least of all what she's observed about Aqua, without hurting their feelings. She's an outside observer who doesn't have the courage to speak up.

And then there's the director, with the most insight into Aqua's mental state, who could overlook Aqua trying to keep Ruby from becoming an idol because he knows how much that scares Aqua. He knows probably most of the background shit Aqua has been pulling and the connections he's made over time and instead of recognizing Aqua's plans as self destructive, he enables him.

Maybe he does this because just like Miyako he doesn't think he could stop Aqua. Or because he wants revenge, too. But ultimately I find him helping Aqua the most egregious, because what Aqua is doing is reckless, is destroying his still existing personal relationships and is leading him directly towards someone who is clearly very dangerous.

(There's also something to be said about Akane withholding her insights into Ai's murder/Aqua's father multiple times to "protect" Aqua, which technically would have been the right choice in order to keep him from spiraling further but was an incredibly naive thing to do since it was impossible to keep those secrets for long. So it just had the opposite effect of delaying a much worse emotional reaction and heightening Aqua's desperation to get his revenge and making it clear to Akane that while he never trusted her anyways, he now especially doesn't have any reason to confide in her.)

[skania]

Let's talk about Aqua "using" Akane

So Aqua makes a very big deal about "using" Akane, but... did he actually use her at all?

I mean, he makes it quite clear that he is only keeping her close because she's useful, right?

So, what is Akane useful for, exactly?

Aqua's entire premise is that Akane understands Ai better than he does. He can't lose Akane because she may help him figure out Ai and find out who his dad is.

But we never, ever see Aqua asking Akane questions about Ai. At the contrary, most of his time with Akane is spent either on Aqua and Akane helping each other, or on Aqua talking to Akane about himself rather than about Ai.

(Spoilers for the entire manga below the cut!)

Let's take the TB arc for example, since this is the arc where Aqua and Akane interact again. What do we see?

First, Aqua helps Akane voice her concerns about the script:

Then he helps solve the disconnect between the ones in charge of the script and the original author, thus doing Akane and everyone involved a big service:

Then he helps Akane win against Kana, going as far as to agree to do emotional acting in order to accomplish it:

And then he helps Akane draw Kana out into the spotlight:

In other words: Aqua spends the entire arc working as a team with Akane. He makes no effort to use her at all.

What's more, all the occasions he had to get Akane's insight about Ai? He uses them to give Akane insight about himself instead.

Which is ironic, because we eventually find out that he even went as far as planting a GPS on her sometime after Love Now, in the off-chance Akane came in contact with the culprit. He obviously was pretty serious about making the most of Akane's deduction skills...

... but how was Akane supposed to deduce anything when Aqua never gave her any info? After all, Aqua only shares that information with Akane after he thinks his revenge is over and he has no use for her anymore.

Which means that, up to the point where Aqua temporarily drops his revenge plans, we don't actually see him using Akane at all.

Despite this, we still see Aqua going on and on about how he has "used" Akane.

So, let's take a closer look at all the ways he has "used" Akane, shall we?

• "About my father" is the simplest one, since that's what Aqua wanted to use Akane for in the first place. Except that, as we saw, things don't go quite as planned and he literally doesn't do anything to have Akane find his dad.

So yes, Aqua did intend to use Akane to find his dad, but he doesn't actually put her to use. In fact, Akane finds him all on her own by pure chance much, much later.

• "The corpse" is a very interesting one, because by Aqua's own admission, he trusted Akane's capabilities enough to think she may be able to find his corpse, and fed her information to help her achieve this.

This is indeed true, except for two things. One, when Aqua starts looking for the corpse, he actually tells Akane to stay behind. She's the one that chooses to follow after him. Aqua makes it sound like Akane finding his corpse was his goal from the get-go, but his actions are at odd with his words.

Secondly, Aqua stops looking for the corpse the moment Akane suggests it may be buried, but he still takes her to Goro's house either way.

Nothing he tells her about Goro is relevant to the search of his corpse. It's completely irrelevant, in fact. But Aqua still opens up to her, sharing everything about Goro, from his upbringing to his goals to his feelings.

Once again, his words say one thing, but his actions tell a different story. Akane is the first person Aqua has opened up to about Goro, and he does so without any ulterior motive.

Which leads me to the way Aqua has "used" Akane:

• "And many other things."

This is what Aqua means by "many other things". Ever since that day, Akane has been giving Aqua emotional support and he has come to treasure it, so much so that it "saves him little by little".

I'd even say he has come to rely on it, as his monologue later shows.

Now, you may say, but isn't receiving and giving emotional support a normal part of every relationship?

And you'd be completely right! But Aqua isn't a normal guy.

Aqua is guilt-ridden to the point he is in pain whenever he enjoys anything. Since the guilt he feels colors basically everything he sees, it permeates his relationship with Akane as well.

Instead of seeing all the good he has done for her, he just sees all the ways he ties her down.

Instead of seeing how much of himself he has shared with her, he focuses on what he has kept from her.

He is such a guilt-ridden, self-deprecating person that he even apologizes when Akane finds his corpse. As if getting murdered and not being found for 20+ years was his fault!

Akane puts it best: Aqua is always trying to carry the burden on his own, always acting like every wrong is his fault.

It's no surprise then that Aqua feels guilty over allowing himself to cherish Akane's support. It's also no surprise that he tries to paint it negatively as him "using" her, because Aqua has been trying to convince himself that his relationship with Akane is a lie.

If he repeats it enough, if he makes his every action about using Akane, then it will be easier for him to let go of her — even when that becomes the last thing he wants to do.

This all comes to a head in Chapter 98, where we see Aqua cutting ties with Akane to keep her safe. This was the perfect time to use Akane, for real this time — but "using" Akane has become a lie that he can't keep up any longer.

Akane has become too important to him. So important in fact, that leaving her side marks the moment he makes a wrong turn and gives himself into the darkness of his revenge.

TL;DR Aqua did want to use Akane, but he never gets around to it. He comes to rely on her emotional support and feels so guilty for it that he sees that as "using" her. Ironically, by the time Akane becomes the perfect "tool" for him to use in his quest for revenge, she matters too much to him and he lets her go to keep her safe. In fact, Akane only makes herself "useful" to him by pure chance! lol

[hamliet]

Oshi no Ko's Angel of Light: Kamiki Hikaru

So, I wrote a review of Oshi no Ko previously, just not on this blog. I talked there about the meaning of Hoshino Ai as a name (it's literally hoshi no eye, Ai spelled in katakana to reinforce that it's a loanword, meaning starry eye, and of course, eye/ai is a homonym for love) and how Oshi no Ko uses wordplay and puns to introduce its themes.

Naturally, I wanted to talk about the other parent, whose name is just as significant.

Kamiki Hikaru is literally "god of light/shining god." Well, okay, sort of. It's technically "kami of light," and kami doesn't translate super well into English. It's often referred to as a god in Shintoism, but it's not quite the western perception of a god. Spirit is another popular translation.

Of course, this references the supernatural themes of the story, as well as Hikaru's role. See, "angel of light" is what the Christian Bible calls Lucifer, the Christian devil. Pretty fitting for Hikaru's role in the story as the main villain.

But wait! There's more! Lucifer itself, as a name, refers to the planet Venus, known as the morning star. Which, of course, is the "star" we see in the story associated with Ai.

(Yes, the story is very much using distinctly Christian allusions alongside Shinto ones.)

Hikaru, like Lucifer, is known to, well, want everything for himself. That doesn't mean he wants all the worship of the world like Lucifer literally did according to mythology. No, instead it's far more insidious but no less disturbing: he sees himself as entitled to dictate how the world runs. He decides whose life is worth living, and makes others pay for mistakes of people they don't even know. He's playing God, in other words--exactly what Lucifer did to fall from heaven in Christian mythology (it's not actually super biblical hence why I'm using "mythology").

Lucifer is also called "Satan" obviously, which literally means "accuser" in Hebrew. That's kind of the perfect summary for what Hikaru sees himself as: he's visiting his hatred of an abuser he has every right to hate on everyone and everything that remotely reminds him of her.

The thing is, as said above, Hikaru does have the right to hate Airi, just like Aqua has the right to hate him. But following the path of revenge is Not The Way.

So, is Hikaru Satan?

No. He's a person.

The Path To Hikaru

Hikaru is not all that different from the other characters we know and love--Ai, Ruby, Kana, Akane, and especially Aqua. Fitting since they're all idols of sorts (yes, Akasaka is constantly using religious references to add social commentary to the idea of an "idol" as a false god/object of worship). They're also all actors.

Hikaru is what Aqua risks becoming. No, seriously. Hikaru was traumatized as a child via rape that led to the creation of a life.

As a result he's pretty anti-life as a whole, and especially anti-woman. He's constantly seeking revenge on women, hence his murder-happy spree. The problem is that he's not seeing these women as individuals: he sees everyone and everything as a representation of Airi, the person who assaulted him.

Also, society as a whole's attitude towards male victims of sexual assault, especially male victims of attractive women, means that Hikaru would not be seen as a victim. One of OnK's major themes is how messed up society is and how it dehumanizes people via fitting them into roles, and this is a perfect example of the harm that can come from it. Hikaru would be seen as a boy, and all boys clearly want sex. A famous actress slept with him? Lucky him! Even though this never came out publicly, Hikaru absolutely knew this was the case and it certainly plays a role in his grudge against the world.

Even though Airi is dead (probably as a result of him provoking her husband by revealing that he wasn't the father), he still isn't satisfied. No, Airi is still everywhere. Killing the perpetrator, making them pay, did not erase his trauma.

If Aqua kills Hikaru, his trauma will likewise not be erased. Not his trauma as Gorou, not his trauma as Aqua. Hikaru's death will fix absolutely nothing in his life besides stopping more murders, but there are ways to do that that, y'know, don't involve killing. If Aqua kills Hikaru, he will lose the best part of Gorou (valuing life) and the best part of Aqua (the future Ai wanted for him, a future with Kana and Ruby).

Aqua, You are Your Father

Aqua, you are your father. It's almost like the entire series has been trying to give you this message and you keep ignoring it. (By the way, because I know I'm going to get asks about this, I am NOT saying Aqua and Hikaru are moral equivalents. Not at all. I'm just saying that Aqua is walking a path that will end with him being just like Hikaru if he doesn't get shoved off said path.)

From being the violent stalker who attacks someone who has never felt loved in his first acting job after Ai's death to scenes like this:

The story is asking Aqua to take a good long look at himself, and he's trying desperately to avoid doing this. Why? Because he's also playing God, same as his father, same as Satan in Christianity. He thinks he is responsible for everything; a natural, childish attitude that people grow out of as they age.

Of course, Aqua is not nearly as toxic in this as Hikaru--he's not attacking innocent people--but the root of this is still a belief that he somehow controls what happens, when he doesn't. He doesn't at all.

Aqua, too, is just a person.

But Aqua struggles to understand what it means to be a person, to be Hoshino Aquamarine.

He struggles to see other people as people, too. This ranges from sabotaging Ruby's auditions to how he treats Akane to his protecting Kana without considering what she wants. It's been brought up multiple times in the story so far:

Aqua also fundamentally does not see Ai as a human being, either. Unlike Ruby, who calls Ai "Mama," Aqua only ever calls her "Ai," her persona. Aqua and Ai are foils to Kana and her own mother, in that Kana's mom lived through Kana only to abandon her, and Aqua is living through his mom... but ignoring what she would actually want.

(Ruby isn't flawless or perfectly healthy, and the story certainly doesn't frame them as good twin bad twin, but Ruby's overall worldview is absolutely more in line with what the story wants to endorse.) That's why we have lines like this, where Ruby reveals that she has a healthier view of their mother than Aqua does. She knows Ai was flawed.

This is extra notable because he has 0 problems calling Hikaru his father. It's almost like Aqua is drowning in self-hatred, in feeling unloved, in the idea that he brings bad luck just by existing.

He'll call out Ruby for her negative traits, but Aqua thinks he deserves them. Aqua dehumanizes himself, the same way he dehumanizes Ai, and he has to see both his mother and himself people before he can step off this path.

Essentially, what he tells Ruby here is exactly what he needs to realize, but he has not done so.

The root of Aqua's God complex is that he cannot move past his trauma. It's actually psychologically realistic that a child who experienced such an event would be stuck in a childish mindset wherein they feel guilt for not being able to save their mother.

But it's not just Ai that Aqua couldn't save. It's Sarina, too. She is the one who introduced him to Ai, after all. He didn't move on from her death in his past life, either, which can probably be traced back to his own tragic birth circumstances--the idea that he only brings death, because his mother died giving birth to him. Gorou even states that he became a doctor to help people like his mother, but the point is also that he wanted to bring life, not death.

Except, he isn't God. Neither Gorou nor Aqua are. He can't save Sarina, and that isn't his fault. But Sarina ends up okay as Ruby, not through his own intervention. Aqua couldn't save Ai, but that's not his fault.

The point I'm making here is that Aqua needs to heal the hurting child within him. The story has also brought up the theme of children suffering at the hands of the entertainment industry numerous times:

His path towards healing would involve taking a long look not just at the hurting child in himself, but the hurting child in Hikaru, too. Which is not the same as excusing. After all, we already saw what happened with Aqua thought his dad was dead: despite the supposed justice and his proclamations about being free, he was still every inch the trapped, terrified, traumatized child afraid to live. Killing Hikaru won't be any different.

Becoming Human

So, is there hope for Aqua?

Yeah. A ton of it.

Despite the tragedy of Ai's story, every other arc has ended optimistically. The story's optimism, also, is fundamentally rooted in humanity. Every character, even the ones who seem like exploitative jerks like the producers who edited Akane to look bad and the self-centered mangakas, end up having their thoughts and motives explored, and we see where they are coming from. Not only that, but they have the best of intentions.

Frankly, this is true to life as well. Precious few people see themselves as the villain. Almost everyone thinks they're doing the right thing. It's very human.

The end of the reality dating show arc is kind of what I expect in the end here. There, all contestants came together and pooled their unique individual talents to exonerate Akane. I would expect Ruby, Miyako, Kana, and Akane (who herself has finally realized that she can step into her own personhood instead of trying to be Ai/whatever Aqua needs and vowed to stop him) to come together to save Aqua from himself.

Aqua is incredibly loved, and he doesn't seem to understand this. Love is what enabled Ai to die smiling. A lack of love, feeling undeserving of love, is what torments Sarina/Ruby, Aqua, Kana, and more. The bastardization of love is what torments Hikaru.

Love allows someone to be themselves, truly, to individuate. This is what Aqua needs to learn:

He also doesn't need to earn the love of those around him, nor the love of Ai. She loved him just because he was her son, and all she wanted was for him to be happy and to live.

Imo, it's pretty unlikely Akasaka plans to end the series with Aqua becoming Hikaru 2.0. My guess is that Hikaru will be stopped because of Aqua, and he'll even likely die, but not at Aqua's hand. I suspect Akane, Ruby, and especially Kana (the one person Aqua has consistently placed above Ai) will help save Aqua from himself.

[aspoonofsugar]

Akane + Kana = Blue (Shadow) + Red (Light)

Here come 2 great girls and 2 great characters! Akane Kurokawa and Kana Arima are Aqua's 2 love interests, but more than that they are key for the story and themes of Oshi No Ko.

SHADOW AND LIGHT

Akane and Kana are linked to 2 opposite ideas:

Akane is a person who accepts others' shadows

Kana is a person who gives others hope and light

Akane is the most perceptive character in the manga. She is incredibly sensitive to the people around her and able to guess their secrets from little details. For example, she infers Ai's personal life by looking at some records. Not only that, but people feel they can trust Akane and share with her intimate information. This is true for both Aqua and Ruby:

Both siblings tell Akane a part of their previous selves' story. Akane doesn't ask for it, but listens to them. She is so accepting, she is even ready to compromise her morality for others:

She looks straight at people's darkness and doesn't flinch. She welcomes the shadow.

Kana is strongly associated with light:

The acting who makes her famous as a child is her ability to shine on the stage. Not only that, but she chooses white as her idol color and sings about becoming a full moon. She brings light into the night and helps others shine. So, she fittingly becomes a beacon of hope for both twins:

Aqua is drawn to Kana's cheerful and strong personality and wants to see more of it. Ruby wants to help Kana, even when she is going through her DarkRuby phase. For a moment, her friendship with Kana brings back Ruby's inner light.

So, Akane is so empathic she accepts people's flaws, while Kana is so cheerful she brings joy to people. Still, their juxtaposition doesn't stop at what they represent for others.

BLUE AND RED

Akane and Kana have opposite color schemes. Akane is blue and Kana is red. Blue and red are complementary colors and they are generally associated with different ideas:

blue is mind, shyness and introversion

red is heart, impulsiveness and extroversion

These personality traits fit Akane and Kana and their acting methods:

Akane studies alone and immers herself into the script. She looks inside:

Her acting is understanding the characters.

Kana reacts to the people around her and matches their performance. She looks outside:

Her acting is interpersonal relationships.

Akane is introspective and focuses on the characters (blue). Kana instead is reactive and focuses on the actors (red). That said, the 2 actresses' color juxtaposition hides an additional meaning:

Ai is purple, which is the combination of blue and red. Similarly, Akane and Kana (just like the twins) are 2 sides of Ai. Still, who is Ai?

I have never been loved by anyone Nor have I loved anyone else

Ai is a person who has never loved nor has ever been loved.

TO LOVE AND TO BE LOVED

To love and to be loved are the 2 sides of Ai (love). Akane and Kana too explore these 2 concepts.

Akane is surrounded by people who love her. Her parents genuinelly want her to be happy and they support her career and relationships. The same goes for her manager. Still, when Akane gets cyber-bullied, she struggles to call for help. Not only that, but later on she states she is not sure she loves Aqua:

In short, Akane has trouble understanding relationships and approaches them in the most complicated way possible. She admires Kana and wants for her to shine again. Instead of conveying her feelings properly, though, she starts a rivalry. She wishes to help Aqua and to build a relationship with him. Still, she both lies and silently accepts Aqua's lies.

Kana is instead very upfront with her feelings, but she ignores people's darkest sides, which makes her easy to manipulate. After all, Kana often gives in to others' requests, even if it is not what she wants. This tendency stems from trauma:

As a small child, Kana is abandoned by the adults around her because she stops being an asset. Both her mother and manager ditch her and nobody gives her work anymore. As a result, Kana becomes a push-over in the hope of being accepted.

So, both Akane and Kana have self-issues which prevent them from developing healthy relationships. Akane doesn't know how to love, while Kana fears to be unloved. These 2 complexes make so that Ai gets sometimes reborn in the 2 girls:

Akane is actress Ai, the genius performer, who lies to both others and herself

Kana is idol Ai, the girl, who shines brightly in her genuine search for love

Akane and Kana's similarity with Ai is why Aqua feels drawn to both in different ways. He projects his mother on his 2 love interests. However, Akane and Kana are not Ai, but their own people. So, their arcs break this dychotomy between them and show that they are 2 girls growing up. Not only that, but they are deep down very alike.

AKANE = BLUE + RED

Akane is associated with blue (blue hair and eyes), but her name means red. Why is there this contradiction? A possible answer is that Akane is strongly disconnected from herself. Or to better say, Akane has no idea of who she is. This is precisely why she struggles so much throughout her introductory arc.

True Love is a reality show, where the participants have to play themselves and flirt with others. For example, Yuki uses her true feelings as an inspiration for her performance. However, Akane can't do the same because she is confused by romance and lacks a personality of her own. This is why she is a genius actress. She forgets herself and becomes someone else. It is Akane's modus operandi and she eventually uses it also in True Love. And who does she become?

She plays Aqua's ideal girl. Not only that, but she keeps on this role throughout time, as she becomes more involved in Aqua's revenge plot:

Akane knows Aqua is not in love with her. Still, she decides it is fine to be used, as long as she is aware of it. Later on, she realizes Aqua has feelings for Kana, but accepts them in exchange of his honesty. Akane believes that with time her bond with Aqua will become the real thing. However, she is wrong, as a lie stays a lie:

In the end, neither Aqua nor Akane are honest with each other. Aqua violates Akane's privacy and Akane keeps silent about Aqua's father. She decides to solve things by herself, just like she did with the cyber-bullying. Akane is full of people who love her, but she refuses to depend on them. She tries to deal with everything alone and puts her life in danger:

She is very much like Aqua in this, which is why the moment they come clear they break-up. Akane and Aqua genuinely care for each other. However, they can't have a proper relationship because they choose to lie and to self-sacrifice.

Akane gives up her whole sense of self to properly play the part of Ai. Still, she isn't Ai and her break-up with Aqua is the perfect chance to realize it. Right now, she is determined to save Aqua by herself. She still believes she can be Aqua's perfect girl, one way or another. However, she is wrong. She can't and shouldn't save Aqua alone. She should open up to others and ask for help. In this way, she can finally break character and show her genuine self. She can embrace her inner red.

KANA = LIGHT + SHADOW

Kana is linked to light, but she is currently stuck in shadows both in her career and in her personal relationships. This is made clear since her introductory arc.

Sweet Today is a low budget production whose real goal isn't to tell a good story, but rather to advertise models. Kana is chosen because of her good personality and fame. She sees this as an opportunity and a sign of appreciation. However, the producer's words reveal she is being taken advantage of. Nobody cares about her second chance in the enterteinment world, but they only use her because she is convenient. Not only that, but Kana is forced to match the other cast members' level of acting. The result is that she hides her real self.

Luckily, Aqua is there for Kana and eventually she is able to shine a little:

This is a recurring dynamic between Kana and Aqua. Kana tries to hide her real talent for the sake of harmony on the stage. However, Aqua takes care of things, so that Kana can shine:

In short, Aqua is a healing presence in Kana's life. She feels invisible and unwanted to the point she is ready to do anything for some care and appreciation. However, Aqua gives her selfless support:

Still, Kana herself is unaware of Aqua's shadows:

She has known him for a long time, but knows nothing of his revenge plan, his past as Gorou and his manipulative streak. It is telling that when Aqua masks as Piyo Kana is unable to see through the mask. She can't because she doesn't know who the real Aqua is.

Here it comes a contradiction in Kana's arc. Among all the characters, she is the one mostly linked to truth:

She is so honest she makes her feelings for Aqua clear five minutes after meeting him. She even ends up confessing her crush on a stranger out of loyalty towards Aqua and her own emotions. Not to mention that it is to protect her that Aqua reveals the truth about Ai. And yet, she is kept in the dark of others' machinations. She is oblivious to her friends' struggles and seems not to notice their strange behaviours.

So, her arc should really be about overcoming this flaw. If Kana wants to shine, she needs to experience shadows. If she wants to have healthy bonds with others, she needs to discover and accept their darkness. She is slowly going through this process.

As a child, she shines, but is self-centered. When she grows up, she painfully realizes she has to value others more and becomes much more selfless. However, at the beginning of the series, she is being consumed by this approach and is helped by others to re-discover her selfish self a little bit more. She realizes she is beautiful when she steals everyone's attention and that her brutal honesty can help people grow.

Right now, she needs to reconcile her caring personality with her personal need to shine. Her trust in people with the knowledge even her loved ones can make mistakes. In short, she must find a way to shine, while helping others to shine too:

She doesn't have to sacrifice herself to be accepted, but at the same time Kana herself is at her happiest when all the actors play together to the utmost of their abilities. She must be the sun who selflessly makes others shine.

AKANE AND KANA'S ENDINGS

So, what will be the conclusion of Akane and Kana's stories? So far, it is too soon to say, but some hypothesis can be made.

First thing first, let's address the elephant in the room. I think Akane, Kana and Aqua's love triangle will resolve in Kana's favor. Imo the story has been very clear about it.

Aqua's reaction to Akane and Kana is opposite:

He involves himself with Akane to pursue his revenge and he is drawn to her because she resembles Ai

He stays away from Kana because of his revenge and his fear Kana is gonna end up targeted like Ai

In short, Aqua projects on both girls with different results. He projects on Akane his wishes and on Kana his fears. So, it makes sense that by the end he lets go of Ai's ideal (he says goodbye to Akane) and overcomes his fears (he acts on his feelings for Kana).

Of course, recently, there has been a shift in this dynamic. Aqua has in fact broken his bond with Akane to protect her, while he has started a manipulative relationship with Kana. Still, this inversion is due to the story entering its climax. It is in fact necessary to challenge all the characters.

Structurally, Akane and Kana do not have the same focus. Akane's storyline serves Aqua and Kana beautifully. She supports their arcs, while developing herself. Kana instead is the tritragonist of the manga. A lot of focus is given to her feelings and career each arc. Moreover, these plotlines have nothing to do with the main conflict, which means Kana is basically having her own story. Still, obviously Kana's story and the main plot are meant to become one in the climax. So, she is meant to have a big role in Aqua's arc.

Finally, a conclusion where Aqua and Kana are together fits both girls' individual arcs.

Akane should stop imitating others and discover who she is. For her to succeed she should go back to what she originally desired:

Akane's true desire is a genuine connection. She starts acting not because she thinks it is cool, but because she wants to become friends with Kana. However, Akane's strategy to grow closer to others is to change herself and become an ideal:

She wants to win Kana's friendship by becoming like her. And yet, this backfires as Kana is already struggling with people discarding her to favor other children. Surely, a girl who imitates her is not the kind of friend Kana wants by that point. Interestingly, Akane is mature enough to figure this out and doesn't really resent Kana for it. To the contrary, she deep down wants Kana to go back to shine, but her attempts to inspire Kana do not work. So, what can Akane do to grow close to Kana and help her shine?

Maybe Akane simply has to tell Kana the truth about Aqua. She could let go of her stubborness and open up to another person. After all, the only way to forge bonds is to show who you are and hope the other will accept you.

Such a resolution on Akane's part would help Kana. Kana's problem is that she ignores everyone's shadows. She can't hope to help her loved ones if she has no idea of who they are. Kana's test will be to accept Aqua's darkest part and to keep on loving him.

She will 100% succeed. Kana is great at pursuing what she loves, even when it's not perfect. She is the character who has been a part of the enterteinment world the longest. She has been broken and let down many times. However, she still loves acting and the people she meets in her job. She may not be a genius anymore, but she is a strong, dependable and flexible actress. She likes the enterteinment world despite its flaws and will keep on loving the twins and Akane.

This is why Kana is the brightest star:

She has more passion and attachment to life than everyone else.

[mars-graveyard]

it is complete. i took two photos because my shadow was getting in the way a bit fhgdsf.

artists because they deserve credit:

'family ended with adam and eve' piece - @narcissisticnugget

ai chibi - oshi no ko official art

matthias and nina piece - @kolarpem

ai at the beach - also official art afaik

arte pollo and lady conchita piece (<3) - @ozeca

arte and pollo/hänsel and gretel piece - @thepixelblender

dull domestic/ill-natured maid piece - caprice-farci-deactivated201505 (that's where i found it anyway)

EAT prologue piece - @manquesit0

arte doodle covering seth up - @tiny-evillious

meta chibi - ichika

arte styling - @ozeca again :>

gluttony crew sketch - ichika. coloured by lady conchita i think but i'm honestly not sure on that one ;-;

[chaos0pikachu]

Cinematography?? In MY BL??? Not as likely as you think.

TLDR: it's a joke!!! but also legit sometimes I see "cinematography in bl" and it's just some basic pictures with mid-tone lighting and blue t-shirts. Let's talk film terms like: aperture, panning, tilting, and movement in film so we can see what goes into cinematography (with sources!). Also if I name a show you like as "boring cinematography" don't send me hate mail I'll laugh

(examples used: Our Skyy2 vs kinnporsche, 2gether vs semantic error, 1000 Stars vs The Sign)

If I name a show you like in this post as "bad cinematography" be chill about it, like, I ain't saying you can't like it, I'm just talking about techniques here not personal likability or overall show quality. I like badly filmed shit too say hello to my collection of Friday the 13th Blue Rays we're just here to talk techniques and like, educational stuff okay?

So the straight (heh) textbook definition of "cinematography" is: the art of making motion pictures. Which, frankly, tells you nothing. Like it's not wrong~~ but it's not informative either. Cinematography covers a lot of what we, the audience, visually see on screen:

"Cinematography is the art of photography and visual storytelling in a motion picture or television show. Cinematography comprises all on-screen visual elements, including lighting, framing, composition, camera motion, camera angles, film selection, lens choices, depth of field, zoom, focus, color, exposure, and filtration." (source)

So let's talk movement in film.

So when I talk about movement, what do I mean? I mean the way the camera, the characters, and the environment moves within a frame.

This video on Akira Kurosawa's usage of movement in a scene is brilliant:

Something as simple as having rain or fire in the background of a shot can enhance the emotions of a scene vastly. it gives the scene depth - literal depth, not narrative depth - that would otherwise be missing.

The way the camera moves and transitions leading the viewers eye back and forth makes what you're watching more engaging. You aren't consuming these scenes, you are engaging with them. They are apart of the story itself, giving the environment life and texture so the characters within them matter more.

And, look, I get busting out Thee Akira Kurosawa might be unfair, but if we're gonna talk cinematography we can't not talk the importance of movement on film.

To understand good cinematography you have to understand what makes it good and as such what makes bad or mediocre cinematography.

In connection with movement we gotta talk about camera techniques like panning and tilting:

"Camera movements are a fundamental part of video production. They can be a powerful storytelling device, heightening tension, evoking emotions, and bringing the viewer into the action. Without saying a word, camera movements can transform a scene’s entire narrative, and direct audiences’ attention where you want it." (source)

So we have movement of environment, of characters, and we also have movement of the camera itself.

Ok so like, where does the BL come in Pikachu??

I'm getting to that, I'm going to start with a more general example: Our Skyy 2 (Bad Buddy meets 1000 Stars edition) vs Kinnporsche.

Starting at 5:17 we have Pran stranded or whatever, and this shot is like, it's fine. It's boring as hell, but fine. Why is it boring as hell? Well it's flat, it lacks movement, it lacks depth.

When the driver drove off the camera could have panned to follow his movement and then panned back to Pran at a different angle to showcase his isolation. Honestly since the scene starts with a mid close up of Pran, I would have had the camera behind Pran as the driver drove away, and had the camera pan around Pran 360 so we get shots of his environment, and him, while also emphasizing holy shit he's like, fucking stuck in the wilderness. 

In general, there's a big lack of movement in the scene. The camera remains almost entirely static, there's no attempt at zooming in or out, following Pran's movement, or showcasing his environment in any meaningful way. Even when Pran begins walking towards the camera the angle of the framing is still centered, rather than tilted downward or upwards to give us more dimension (non-BL comparison, the Book of Eli starring Denzel Washington does the "walking towards the camera" shots really well).

We get a cut of a medium close up of Pran, with a deeper focus so his environment is blurred out.

I understand the thought process of this shot, we want the audience to focus on Pran, but if the point of the scene is to emphasize he's alone, confused, maybe even a bit anxious at his new circumstances it could've been done better. Take a wider shot from this angle, open up the lens to allow for that background environment to come through and show him isolated. Maybe do a pan above him or tilt the camera up going from his feet up as he nervously ruffles his hair. There's options here.

This just adds more walking to the scene, which we already had. It doesn't enhance or emphasize anything about Pran's emotions as a character.

Anyway the camera continues to follow him and then we get another cut. And it's from the same angle as before, only this time we see a truck coming. The camera remains static, it completely stops moving, and we just wait for the truck to drive into the frame.

This whole sequence of events ends at 5:57 and while not a long sequence I find it frustrating because it's boring. The only way the audience knows that Pran is anxious is via Nanon’s acting, there’s nothing in the filmmaking that enhances or contributes to that feeling.

He’s alone, until he’s not, and that’s all the scene tells us. It leaves the scene lacking any tension as well, because we’re not getting a sense of isolation - how large is this space? How alone is Pran right now? What is the entirety of the environment? 

Contrast this with a similar scene in kinnporsche ep06 where Kinn and Porsche are alone in the mountains. I don't have a video of this specific scene so I have to link the trailer, starting at 1:48 to 1:52, but see how we start mid-close up of Kinn and Porsche, then pan out from above them? This is a better showcasing of just how vast the environment around Kinn and Porsche are.

They're still center frame throughout all of this, the depth of the scene is in mid-focus so nothing is blurred out and you can see the sharpness of the environment.

It also places the audience in the same space as Kinn, who is looking up at the sky while the audience looks down at him. It makes the audience a more active participant in the shot, emphasizes the state of the characters, gives the audience a sense of space & environment, and relies a sense of emotion.

The additional fast zoom out also adds to the scene by adding movement and making it more dynamic.

(my man pran looking like this 🧍)

Both these scenes are pretty short, but they're relaying similar information and one is way more dynamic and effective than the other. Both Pran and Kinn/Porsche are alone in the wildness, but in the latter there's a lack of space, a lack of movement, and a lack dimension. This is mainly a framing issue, so let's talk more about camera movement (panning, & tilting).

Here's a scene from 2gether vs a scene from Semantic Error.

(saw someone say 2gether had a high production value and chepie where??)

This entire scene with Sarawat and Tine is flatly shot. There is nothing in their background so no outward movement is happening, the lighting is even as are the colors, everything is at the same depth, and there's little to no motion in the camera.

The scene with Sarawat pushing Tine into frame. Why doesn't the camera follow Tine's motion of movement so the scene has more momentum? It just stops and the char falls out of frame before walking back into it. Then we get a series of cuts back and forth of close ups on Sarawat and Tine's faces. Back and forth, back and forth.

The editing leaves a ton to be deserved because if the back and forth did a quick pan back and forth with each beat we could build up tension, give the scene some texture, heighten the intensity of the argument. If we're going for something softer we could place them in on better set, or make the characters move themselves - have Sarawat walk away from the argument up those stairs, have the camera follow his movement as Tine chases him continuing the argument - or play with the lighting a bit, pan the camera down or tilt it something!

When Tine kisses Sarawat why doesn't the camera move with him in a more notable way? Why did we have a cut to a close up? And then we're back in a mid close up and more cuts and this editor is killing me!

This scene is 4mins long and the only engaging bit of filmmaking here is when the camera follows Tine when he steps closer to Sarawat putting the latter in the frame at 3:15, the entire scene is 4 minutes long.

I want to compare this scene to this scene in Semantic Error which is also all dialogue and also obviously filmed on a shoestring budget.

So right away the camera work here is smart, it starts off in an establishing shot, evenly lit, of Sang Woo and Jae Young both in the frame. Then we get a mid close up of JY looking down, then a tight close up of JY looking up.

The change in camera angle emphasizes his surprise at seeing SW here as he looks up at SW. The lighting has also changed, it's much brighter now. The camera also begins to move, where it was static before it begins to tilt and shift.

We get a cut to SW, the first one of this scene. JY is seeing SW in a new light for the first time, and as such so is the audience. By starting the scene off in an outward shot with both chars in the frame, they are placed on the same level and the audience doesn't see their expressions up close. So when we're hit with JY's close up of surprise and then SW's close up of his wet hair it holds way more impact. It enhances the feelings of JY's character for the audience.

The lighting behind SW has also changed, it's much brighter, and warmer compared to the cooler tones of light behind JY. The camera also slows, and continues to to tilt and shift. JY's world has literally been shifted on his axis.

We get another cut, this time medium on SW and notice, the camera stops moving for that moment and the light around him dims. It's not as saturated. We're moved out of JY's pov here and back into "regular" framing.

SW tries to make JY leave, we get a close up cut of the cut on JY's arm - hey editing used to display important and new information! - then the camera cuts to SW getting medicine and here's a small but important thing, when he tosses at JY the camera follows his movement. And instead of cutting away, when JY gets up thinking SW is hurt, the camera follows JY's movement back towards SW.

It would have been easy to make a cut there back and forth - like in the 2gether scene did over and over - but following the movement of the characters makes the scene way more interesting visually to watch.

Changing the angles of the camera from a lower angle (where JY is looking up) to a downward angle (where SW is looking down) makes the scene more interesting visually as well and enhances the storybeat of JY looking up at SW in a new light memorized. This contributes to the story as well, as it's JY who catches feelings for SW first so their are literally, on uneven ground until they're not later in the story. The camera is panning, tilting, moving with the characters even given the limited space. The lighting adds to the effectiveness, as do the minimal cuts.

On a technical level, the scene in Semantic Error is just better filmed. In my own opinion, the scene is far more engaging b/c the filmmaking is better, where in 2gether the reliance is almost completely on the actors to sell the scene with little help. And I'm not saying nothing about Bright and Win cause their stans wildin'.

Next, I wanna talk about aperture.

I saw a post that used this word and I didn't understand the context in which they were using it because aperture isn't a style of filmmaking its a camera setting or lens adjustment - it's the rate at which the camera opens and closes letting in light and focus.

"Aperture is the opening of the lens through which light passes. When you hit the shutter release button to take the picture, the camera aperture opens to the predetermined width, letting a specific amount of light through. A large aperture lets more light in, and vice versa. Aperture is calibrated in f/stops, written in numbers like 1.4, 2, 2.8, 4, 5.6, 8, 11 and 16. The larger the number, the narrower the aperture." (source) <- really recommend this article if you want to learn about aperture in film.

A great non-BL example of aperture used for style is One Piece Live Action where cinematographers Nicole Hirsch Whitaker, and Michael Wood love using deep focus aperture in a lot of scenes.

But let's compare The Sign vs 1000 Stars.

So when the scene starts, we're in mid-focus/aperture, everything is of similar sharpness and depth. Nothing is especially blurred out we're getting the full spectrum of Phaya and Tharn's environment.

When the camera switches to close ups of Phaya and Tharn however, we get a deep focus aperture. That's why everything behind them is so blurred out. In a close up of Phaya, even Tharn's face is blurred. The director wants the audience to focus specifically on these characters individually, so we can understand the weight of their dialogue. But when the camera wants us to see the characters as a unit, it cuts, pulls back out of that deep focus and everything is back in mid-focus again.

Here's another thing, it's subtle but it's important.

This scene also combines what we already discussed about movement. At :08 of the scene, in that first mid-shot the camera is actually zooming in closer on Phaya and Tharn. Not dramatically, subtly, but it is there. This is important, because at 3:23 we get another mid-shot of them, pulled out of that deep focus, and the camera begins to zoom out.

The camera also follows the movement of Phaya grabbing Tharn's hands, then pans back up to Phaya's face once again before panning higher into the frame and panning back to their faces and zooming in.

When we move back out of that deep focus, into a mid-shot the camera continues to zoom out on the two characters as they kiss.

I saw someone say that this scene wasn't "filmed like BL kisses" and, eh? Like it isn't filmed in that static style of filmmaking which has dominated BL filmmaking probably due to budgetary reasons. But

The Sign follows a similar filmmaking style as Kinnporsche and Domundi shows do. But also just like, basic filmmaking techniques you'd see in shows of the non-CW/soap variety.

The thing fans are seeing here is film technique (probably partially due to a larger budget). Movement, lens adjustment, panning and titling, lighting and color are all playing a role in this specific scene.

Cinematography baby.

(sidenote the VFX of The Sign is dope as fuck too)

Okay so let's talk Our Skyy 1000 Stars

So this opening scene follows a similar structure to the scene in The Sign: mid focus shot of the two chars, into separate deep focus close ups. It's also a dialogue heavy scene like the one with Phaya and Tharn.

So why does their scene work better on a technical level than this one in Our Skyy 2?

The scene in The Sign combines techniques of aperture, movement, lighting, color and framing to give everything more impact.

In this scene with Phupha and Tian we get a similar editing style as the scene in 2gether: lots of back and forth cuts, very tight close ups, static camera movement. Where as the camera zooms in and out during mid-shots, the camera doesn't move in Our Skyy 2. It remains motionless even though a zoom in as the two characters lay in bed would add a lot to the scene itself.

In the close ups the camera continues to remain static, only changing angles when there's a cut. At 1:22 Phupha moves his arm to wrap around Tian, the camera could have taken a closer shot at his arm, and then followed his movement as he wraps it around Tian. Like how the camera followed Phaya's movement when he holds Tharn's hand.

Instead it's just a flat shot, we see his arm wrap around in a mid-focus above shot. The camera does move to follow Tian a couple times - at 1:50 for example. But overall, the scene is stiff - who sleeps like this frfr - in framing, in movement, in depth.

I want to say that I don't think this scene is bad - like I do the 2gether scene or the earlier scene with Pran - I think it's just, okay~~

And no, for none of these examples did I pick "the worst" shots or whatever. I'm not out to get any specific show, but tried to find comparable scenes and compare and contrast the filmmaking techniques used in both and how effectively they were used.

I want to leave off with this.

There's a lot that goes into cinematography, yes this singular shot of Furiosa is amazing, but what makes the scene amazing?

Pay attention to how the camera moves (panning and tilting), when the camera moves (zooms in and out), the movement of the scene (the hair and sand moving), the lighting (Furiosa from behind is in darkness, her side profile more lit), the depth of the scene itself changing (as she walks away from the group the focus/aperture gets deeper on her, then when she walks out of the frame it grows larger to focus on the characters left behind).

All these little things make up what is "cinematography". The more you learn about the techniques used the more you can notice about film and what makes a scene powerful.

As BL gets more budget we're seeing shows expand their filmmaking catalogue more and more. Which is exciting! If fandom is gonna talk cinematography I think it's helpful to have the vocab to do so, and it's cool to watch a scene and be like "oh I see what they're doing here and why and how".

I mentioned other things that go into cinematography like framing, lighting, color, and there's also editing (which is separate). Idk if I'll make a post about those things cause I'm lazy and this shit takes forever to research and write but who knows~~

Check out other posts in the series:

Film Making? In My BL? - The Sign ep01 Edition | Aspect Ratio in Love for Love's Sake | Cinematography in My BL - Our Skyy2 vs kinnporsche, 2gether vs semantic error, 1000 Stars vs The Sign | How The Sign Uses CGI | Is BL Being Overly Influenced by Modern Western Romance Tropes?

[like these posts? drop me a couple pennies on ko-fi]

[aihoshiino]

Oshi no Ko 145: A Story Without 「アイ」

The question of how exactly Aqua and Ruby were reborn is something that floats around vaguely in the early stages of the Oshi no Ko, teased as a mystery that will exist in the background as opposed to one actively pursued for resolution. My theory is that this element of the story was likely more prominent in the version of Oshi no Ko that was originally conceptualized (i.e, the one that did not involve Ai's death) but the abrupt change to the story's dramatic tone and intensity pushed it into the background. As it stands, Aqua's wishy-washy statement that he'll figure it out once he's done enjoying Baby Mode about matches the weight this is given is the narrative, at least to begin with.

Even with the turn in tone and focus the manga takes, we do ultimately circle back to addressing and answering this question via the presence of Crow Girl/Tsukuyomi who seems to be the one responsible for facilitating their reincarnation in some way or another. Admittedly, this reveal in 145 comes a bit abruptly and the implied motivations it ascribes to Tsukuyomi don't… really line up with the things she says and does prior to the Movie Arc. But what really left me a little cold with this reveal is that it does not involve Ai whatsoever. Her name and even her image are not even once mentioned, not even in passing by GRSR.

This made me feel pretty uncomfortable for a variety of reasons I'll get into later but it wasn't until I started going through the manga to look more into how the reincarnation had been discussed before that I realized just why this felt so jarring - it simply wasn't consistent with what came beforehand. While the current explanation excludes Ai entirely, prior discussion of GRSR's reincarnation centers her to an equal and opposite degree.

Both Gorou and Sarina are thinking of Ai as they die, with both of them also (even if only symbolically) hearing her voice in their final moments. Gorou hears her singing as his ringtone plays and Ruby says Ai was "singing in [her] head" up to the very end. Ai's face is implicitly the first thing either of them see after being reborn and Aqua even speculates, as his first guess as to the nature of their rebirth, that it was this strength of feeling all focused on specifically Ai that caused it to happen.

Not only that, but Ai is even centered in the "fake" story of their rebirth that the twins sell Miyako to get her on board.

Perception of this bit in the fandom seems to vary from "it's just a joke" to "Jokes Are The Deepest Lore" and beyond. I myself don't put a massive amount of weight on it. However, in discussions where this is taken even semi-seriously as foreshadowing then it is flatly disingenuous to cherrypick the AQRB crumbs while not giving the same weight to the (imo, equally loaded) implication that Gorou and Sarina were reborn as Ai's children because she herself was favoured by the gods.

As the murder mystery elements of the story take prominence, this question is left unanswered but resurfaces towards the end of the Private arc with the arrival of Tsukuyomi. Here, too, we see Ai being centered as a key figure in Gorou and Sarina's reincarnation - the chapter is even named 'Mother and Mother', in reference to both of Aqua's mothers for each of his lives.

Most tellingly of all to me, however, is Tsukuyomi's appearance at the end of the chapter. Literally her first speaking line is commenting on how kind the gods must be to bring the Hoshinos together - describing them as (paraphrased) two motherless children and a childless mother and ascribing a great deal of weight to their togetherness.

Even if you disagree that the manga is centering Ai in this context, it is undeniable that the togetherness of the Hoshinos as a trio and specifically as a mother and children is what Tsukuyomi is highlighting as being meaningful here.

We even see a repeat of this in chapter 118 and her first on-screen conversation with Aqua.

I've seen people take this to mean, in the context of future chapter hindsight, that she is claiming the 'meaning' of his rebirth is his connection to Ruby. But if you go back and follow the thread that leads to this mic drop... it's a conversation that's about Ai. And specifically, Aqua is told to consider what it means that his soul was reborn in that body (emphasis mine): i.e, what does it mean that he was reborn specifically as Ai Hoshino's son?

With all this laid out, I really don't think it's a stretch to say that Ai, both as an idol and a person, is treated as a more or less equal part of the GRSR -> AQRB reincarnation as the two people being reborn. Which, like… she should be! She's their mother. But when we do finally get around to concretely answering this question..

Zip. Zilch. Nada. It had nothing to do with her. The closest we get to an acknowledgement that she even exists full stop is her goofy ass bunny mascot's face on (presumably) Sarina's snowman.

As I've said before, the basic beats of this as an answer to 'why reincarnation' are not inherently bad or unworkable. An animal repaying human kindness in some supernatural way is a tale as old as tales and given the ways in which Oshi no Ko plays around with mythological and folkloric ideas, making the reincarnation the result of a Tsuru no Ongaeshi-esque repayment of selfless kindness suits it quite well. The issue here is not one of an inherently broken idea, but flawed execution.

If this is the final word on the hows and whys of Gorou and Sarina's reincarnation - and I feel more or less settled that it is - then Ai has been entirely excluded from the birth of her own children. The sheer amount of weight placed on her role, specifically, as Aqua and Ruby's mother has vanished because after all the build up of why? the answer seems to be just that she happened to be pregnant.

I don't think I need to overexplain why it feels gross for Ai to be reduced to a convenient walking uterus in this regard. This was the element of this answer that made me so uncomfortable when from the get go: Ai's arc is so overwhelmingly about her being denied the right to agency over her own body and sexuality and her giving birth to Aqua and Ruby is, in part, a reclamation of it. It wasn't just an act of love performed for her children but also one for herself - she risked everything in order to give herself the family she had longed for her entire life.

If this incongruity was intentional, I think I would be interested in it as an element of Ai's tragedy - the idea that even the birth of her own children was hijacked by forces beyond her control and warped into something that existed to serve her fans. But I really don't get the sense that this was considered at all and honestly… that's kind of equally sad.

I was wordvomiting a much less articulate version of all the above in the Oshi no Brainrot Discord server and @penguinkyun said a few things that I think really nailed the heart of the issue here:

"theres barely anything of ai here when shes such a central character […] removing ai's own emotional stake in the matter and rounding it up to "crow girl felt bad for gorou and sarina because they helped her that one time and then reincarnated them" just…doesnt hold the same impact."

This is, I think, key to what made this reveal fall so flat for me and highlights this chapter's place in a much broader trend of Ai's place in the twins' lives being downplayed and favour of amping up the intensity of the GRSR relationship. To once again quote Lace because I think she sums it up quite neatly:

"[...] akasaka is absolutely ramping up the soap operaness of grsr with ai as collateral."

And that just kind of bums me out. :(