#kino hard hours

[1o1percentmilk]

also watched sorry to bother you today and i liked that a lot it was really funny. i will give you $100,000,000 😁

[eonars]

bro im ngl im playing the fuck out of hellblade 2

[otomehonyaku]

Diabolik Lovers Lost Eden Stellaworth Tokuten Short Stories スペシャル特典小冊子 ☽ Kou ver.

This short story booklet was part of the Stellaworth set for Lost Eden! Keep reading below the cut for Kou's version.

S ☽ [Ayato’s version by @kyouxa] [Laito’s version by @kyouxa] [Shuu’s version] [Reiji’s version] [Kanato’s version] [Subaru’s version]

M ☽ [Ruki’s version] [Yuma's version] [Kou’s version] [Azusa’s version]

TK ☽ [Carla’s version] [Shin’s version] [Kino’s version]

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

As always, special thanks to @karleksmumskladdkaka for providing the scans ♡⸜(˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝ Please do not reuse or post my translations elsewhere or translate my work into other languages without my permission.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Many hours must have passed since I started reading the documents–large piles of papers containing difficult strings of characters.

The nights were particularly long in the Demon World, and it wasn’t uncommon to waste an entire human day if you didn’t consciously check your watch every once in a while. When I noticed that my vision was starting to become blurry, I finally decided to lay down on the sofa.

“Ah… I’m no good at this after all.”

I sighed heavily. The strength drained from my arms as I did, sending the papers scattering to the floor.

I had wanted to take a look at the papers Karl Heinz had bequeathed to Eden’s medical school. My hopes were high when I started, but I hadn’t been prepared for such a large volume of papers with such complicated contents. My spirits had fallen right away.

What was Karl Heinz thinking when he ended his life? I thought I would be able to understand him better if I did some research, but…

“Ugh… I’m done. Time for a break!”

I stood up, out of my mind, and quickly headed for the door.

Come to think of it, I hadn’t seen her for a while. She had been so kind to give me space, but I wanted to see her face right away. I wanted to be spoiled by her.

My feelings came bubbling to the surface one after the other. With great force, I yanked open the door, and there was–

“...Huh? Kitten!?”

“I-I’m sorry for bothering you.”

For some reason, my lovely girlfriend was standing right there in front of the door. Was this a coincidence? No, fate? I hesitated to ask her about it since I could not quite make sense of it myself, but she beat me to it.

“Um… I thought you might need a break, so I brought you tea,” she ventured, holding a tray in her hands with a tea set on it.

“Really? Thank you! Come in, come in!” I was elated at her thoughtfulness. She had gone through all that trouble to bring me tea! I took the tray from her with one hand and motioned for her to sit with my free hand. 

I loved seeing her so flustered, face red all the way to her ears, when we sat down on the sofa together. 

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

“Mm… It’s delicious!” I praised her while I drank all of it. The tea she prepared was the best-tasting tea in the world. 

I stared at the bottom of the empty cup for a moment, lost in thought. How had she already warmed my heart so much when I had been sighing non-stop only minutes ago? 

“Kou… are you okay?” Worried about my sudden silence, she eyed me with slightly glassy eyes. 

“Huh? I’m fine, but…”

“I’m glad. I was wondering if you weren’t pushing yourself too hard… I was worried about you.”

Oh, how she always saw through me right away. I grimaced internally, but at the same time, I was glad that she did.

She’s adorable. I like her. I love her. My heart overflowed with my feelings for her. Still, confessing all of this to her was quite embarrassing, so I beat around the bush.

“Ah, you’re right, I think I might be tired after all. So…”

Smiling mischievously, I enthusiastically lowered my head onto her soft thighs.

“Will you let me lay on your lap like this, Kitten?” I winked at her mischievously as I asked her. 

She giggled at first, but when she saw me pout, she apologised and gently stroked my hair. It felt like time stood still when her cheeks reddened. 

I was ridiculously happy, I thought, and then the two pictures on my desk caught my eye.

The first picture was of me, my brothers, and Karl Heinz. The second one depicted us four brothers and her. 

Both pictures featured us all smiling. Even if we were not connected by blood, and even if we didn’t know every little thing about one another…we lived a surprisingly mundane, happy life together. That’s all I ever wanted in a family.

When I turned to face her, I pulled her in close and kissed her on the lips.

“Hey… Let’s be together as a family forever, okay?”

[centrally-unplanned]

I played Needy Streamer Overload, which was a lot of fun, with an asterisk. NSO is a Lifesim Management game for a batshit up-and-coming streamer, where you as her 'boyfriend' allocate her time between streaming, resting, and content inspiration/development to hit 1 million followers. The writing is very on point for actual streams culture;the topics and comments and all that are very true-to-life, while its zany edgecore presentation is hilarious. And the UI is full kino:

Vibes - and also, spoilers, not just a cutesy aesthetic, as the player is not in fact a real person so the digital viewport is ludonarratively cohesive, +1 point.

However, it also pissed me off for specific me reasons!

So, these games tend to go into two buckets. One is the engine builder - managing the lifesim is both involved and The Point of the game. You work hard to optimize and achieve the goal. The second is narrative device - the lifesim elements are more about narrative choice than challenge, and either can't be failed or are trivially cleared. You approach playing those 2 game types differently.

NSO presents itself like the former - its mechanics are pretty involved. Managing Followers, Stress, Affection, & Mental Darkness, all on a clock, while unlocking ~10 different streaming content topic progression trees, its a lot to track. Not saying its crazy hard or anything, but its what you spend your time doing. You will be asking yourself questions like "yes I could have sex with her for the third time this week to lower stress and boost affection so I can burn that affect buildup on the Sexy Stream lvl 2 to sync my highest topic bonus with my streaming streak bonus before I need to end it for a rest cycle, but I can only play that card so many times, is day 13 too early?". That is fun, and where your focus lies. On my first playthrough I tried to hit the 1 million target, barely succeeded, but burned out Ame's stats so much I got a short, pretty-much-failed ending.

So on my second playthrough I tinkered around and stumbled on a soft infinity engine, where I could push Ame's stress to the limit in the opening days to get her follower count to the point where she would unlock "follower milestone celebration" streams that I could bank, that did not increase stress but would count towards a streaming-every-day streak bonus, and never take a rest day to get that bonus insanely high. I got several million followers with low stress, low darkness, I thought I did a good job.

And I got a short, pretty-much-failed ending.

Turns out this game has 30 endings, and the lions share of the long, involved ones are from you completely fucking up. You will get a way more interesting ending if you make Ame-chan overdose on LSD and she trips her way into breaking though the illusion of the internet. You want to raise her darkness high as hell for half of them. You can found a cult, you can induce all sorts of violence against her or others, whatever you want. But the game didn't tell me!!

It instead presented me with a solid optimization puzzle, which I spent like 10 hours doing. I shouldn't have bothered! It doesn't really tell this partially for surprise, but if we are being honest its because they expect you to google it, and they expect you to watch streamers unlock 25 of them after you do 5. Which is how modern games are made, but personally I don't love relying on that. I do think games are at their best when they self-teach a player the right way to engage with it.

But I respect that some people would see the discarded scraps of a tryhard faildaughter that is Ame-chan and immediately push her into doing conspiracy theory streams while smoking weed. I am just not someone you can plunk an engine in front of and expect me not to try to tinker with it. This is 50% on me.

[cathy-pso2]

Rant

I feel like the internet has normalized being a hater too much. There are so many shows and movies in the past decade where people will make longwinded rants on YouTube saying "X is garbage and here is why" or "The absolute state of <Franchise>" or "Y is the the worst <franchise> movie" and then I go watch the thing and it looks either fine or the flaws in it are so milk toast that I honestly don't get where the hate comes from.

My page is PSO2 themed so you'd think i'm strictly referring to that but I'm not even doing that right now. I'm mostly speaking about stuff like Avatar, Star Wars, Pokemon and Marvel right now. I've seen so many videos on YT claiming The Legend of Korra is terrible and absolutely ruins The Last Airbender. The show is alright? Like yeah, the first two seasons have more bad than good but anyone saying Season 3 and 4 aren't Kino are lying to themselves imo.

With Star Wars people hated on the Prequel Trilogy for a whole decade. To the point where when Disney bought the franchise you could actively tell they were trying to distance themselves from that trilogy. But the people who grew up on prequels started sharing appreciation for it online and now we're arguably getting more prequel fanservice than Original Trilogy. And even the stuff that takes place after the Original Trilogy is slowly building the groundworks for the Sequel Trilogy to make more sense. And I don't doubt for a second in a few years that trilogy will have the same effect of late appreciation.

I was convinced people hated the recent pokemon games with a passion but I actually got Pokemon Scarlet for Christmas last year so I decided to finally play it last month and... The game is fun? Probably most fun I've had since Black 2 White 2? Yeah the graphics are shit but I never cared too much about that anyway. I still play games like Gothic 1 and 2 which were made almost 25 years ago and look like the polygons were made with playdoh because I enjoy the gameplay so much that I can look past the aging visuals. And yeah, I don't get the hate for PSO2 either. I play it daily for multiple hours. The game offers insane sandboxes for self expression so it baffles me seeing videos like "PSO2 is a disaster" when its the most fun I've had with a MMO since the initial "MMO magic" ran out.

With Marvel I get its hard to stay invested right now because the only decent plot thread we've had needed to be retconned but a lot of these "terrible" movies and shows are either inoffensively bad or just plain mediocre. How is that enough to make people go on a multi-video tirade on YouTube or a 5 hour long rant?

I genuinely don't get it. Why do people enjoy being miserable like that on the internet? I legitimately can't trust anyone's negative opinion online anymore.

[seeingteacupsindragons]

Hi, I wanted to ask, if you know where I can get the Paper Versions of the JR Books in the Original Japanese, considering I live in Europe and getting Japanese Books here is kind of difficult

Plus, I really hope, that it will go uphill for you soon, while I feel you, in Terms of Things being seriously hard for me right now too, I firmly believe and hold onto Hope that it will get easier and we will be better for it (sorry if this is too sappy, but I genuinely hope you'll be okay :D)

Well, I am not European, so my answers might be somewhat limited. For instance, have a Kinokuniya USA maybe half an hour from me. So I can pick up Japanese paper books there. If you have a similarly large Japanese immigrant population center near you, they might have something similar.

But you're probably going to have to go online and order them and pay a whole bunch in shipping.

You can get them from CDJapan, you can get them from Amazon Japan, you might be able to get them from Kino or similar bookstores online if you feel like fighting with them about your shipping address because they can be pills about it sometimes. YESASIA has them.

What is most convenient for you will vary based on a lot of details I don't know, but those are probably good places to start.

And I know @jenatwork is a European Jeweler Richard fan (for as much as the UK still wants to be counted as European, anyway), so they might have a better idea, although I don't think they tend to pick up the Japanese versions.

Or you could just fly to Japan and buy them in person! Why not, that's not an incredible markup for some books or anything!

I got the first several off Amazon Japan back in 2020, and the others from CDJapan and one friend picked up volume 11 for me while she was in Japan.

I don't really recommend Amazon, though. Try CDJapan.

[aeoki]

New Start GO! - Prologue

Location: Inside Train Characters: Hajime, Tomoya, Mitsuru & Nazuna Season: Winter Writer: Seitarou Kino & Akira

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ< The middle of February. On the commuter train. >

Nazuna: Urghhh…! I–I can’t move…!

Hajime: A–Are you okay, Nii-chan? Hold onto me if you feel like you’ll get separat–

Whaa!?

Nazuna: You say that but look at you, Hajime-chin – the crowd has dragged you all the way over there~!

Oh, now that I think about it, where have Mitsuru-chin and Tomo-chin gone? I don’t see them anywhere…

Mitsuru: I’m here, y’know~! I can’t move my body but I’ve been training every day so I’m fine!

Tomoya: I’m over here. I’m surrounded by people taller than me so you probably can’t see me, though.

How many people can fit in here anyway? I honestly underestimated the rush hour.

This isn’t something anyone should experience five days a week.

Nazuna: Yeah. But there are actually a lot of people who have to experience this during the weekdays~

Anyway, I’m glad you two are all right. Not that I could’ve imagined this is how horrifying commuter trains would be!

Office workers sure have it rough. I never would’ve thought there’d come a day where I’d be in their shoes.

Hajime: That’s precisely why it’ll be a good experience for us. I’m looking forward to seeing how our first day of work will be like.

Nazuna: Yeah. We’ve gotta make sure we meet their expectations since we were chosen for the project.

(In any case… There are five stations left until the company office – Let’s do our best!)

(...Ahaha. That sounds a bit weird.)

(I balance life as an idol and a university student, but to think I’d get to experience being an office worker too. It really is a strange opportunity ♪)

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ< A few days earlier. >

Nazuna: …”New Start Go!”?

Tomoya: Hmm. So it’s a special segment part of a variety TV show where they’ll watch us working in an office, right?

Hajime: We’ll be working at a company that sells menswear. We can promote their suits at the same time, so it’s like hitting two birds with one stone for the company…

I see, so that’s why we’ll be getting work experience there. I understand now, Anzu-san.

Tomoya: But work experience, huh. Are we up for this…?

Mitsuru: It just means we’ll be wearing suits and working, right? That sure sounds fun, y’know!

Tomoya: Well, the people watching us will definitely see it that way, but we’ll just be useless in the office. I have a feeling we’ll just get in their way.

I’m happy you offered this opportunity to us, Anzu-san, but I’m sorry. I don’t think we should make a decision right away.

So can you tell us a bit more about it?

Why did this sort of work offer come to us in the first place? What sort of work are they wanting from us…? I’d like to hear the specifics before accepting.

Hajime: Is it because we held out on our own against “Eden” during “Boogie Time”, so everyone suddenly has their attention on us…?

It’s true we’re used to variety shows, so maybe that’s why we were seen as equals with “Eden” there.

Nazuna: And a higher-up from a TV station noticed that we have potential and decided they wanted to see more, huh.

It’s great they acknowledged our variety skills, but this job will be pretty tough.

Mitsuru: I’m fine whenever and with whatever as long as it’s fun!

Tomoya: Don’t say yes so easily. I don’t think working in a company office is an easy thing to do, you know?

Mitsuru: Hmm~ But I’m not gonna be there to play~

Tomoya: Well, I guess you could say things like being an idol or acting also count as social experience… but working at an office will be a lot of work. My dad looks like he’s having a hard time every day.

It’s a different kind of difficulty from being idols – it’s a contest of who’s more talented there. They have a lot of rules you have to follow, so wouldn’t that be the worst kind of environment for you, Mitsuru?

Mitsuru: Hmm~ You think so? Sounds pretty strict!

So does that mean we should say no? Whaddya guys think?

Hajime: It’s a difficult choice… I think Tomoya-kun has a point, but I also think there will be things we can learn from the experience.

It would be nice to have some time to decide, but what do you say?

This work offer suddenly appeared out of the blue for us, so I think it would be best for the company if we have time to discuss before making a decision.

Tomoya: I agree. It’s not something we can easily say yes to and we’re happy they think highly of us “Ra*bits”.

Nazuna: Yeah. Sorry, Anzu, it seems our opinions are split, so can we have some time to think things over?

Right. Sorry we can’t give you an answer right away.

Tomoya: Anzu-san, would it be okay if we gave you our answer two or three days from now? We’ll do some research on the company until then.

Okay. We’ll also read through the proposal carefully if you have it. Sorry for all the trouble!

Nazuna: …You’ve got to get going, so you’ll send it by email? Sorry, you’re so busy, but you came all the way here to talk to us in person,.

Yeah. We’ll make a responsible decision. If we decide to accept, then we’ll be in your care, Anzu.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤNext Chapter →

[ogradyfilm]

Andor: The Terrible Mundanity of Evil

[The following essay contains MAJOR SPOILERS; YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!]

How does a totalitarian regime solidify its reign? Through fear and intimidation? Although the Star Wars saga’s nefarious Empire is no stranger to flashy shock and awe tactics (as evidenced by their propensity for planet-obliterating super weapons like the Death Star), Andor—the franchise’s most recent Disney+ series—reexamines this brute force strategy. Tyranny, writer Tony Gilroy argues, is at its most insidious when it subtly permeates all aspects of everyday life, desensitizing the populace to its presence; the machinery of subjugation becomes normal, mundane, inevitable. Indeed, the inherent inefficiency of the bloated, underfunded bureaucracy—the false promises, the inconsequential concessions, the tangled web of red tape—becomes so utterly boring that it’s almost a comfort.

The show’s prison arc—which finds our protagonist incarcerated (without trial) on a remote penal island—explores this theme in miniature. The facility’s security staff is surprisingly minimal; instead of being locked behind iron bars and beaten with truncheons, inmates are forced to perform monotonous menial labor on an assembly line—twelve-hour shifts every day until their sentences expire. The work is as competitive as it is repetitive: the most productive teams are granted insubstantial “rewards” (food that tastes marginally better than their usual flavorless nutrient paste), while those that “neglect their duties” are severely punished (remote electroshock torture). Additionally, certain trusties—such as Andy Serkis’ Kino Loy—wield a modicum of authority, acting as overseers and enforcing the guards’ stringent quotas. These methods serve to dehumanize and isolate the victims, reducing them to individual cogs in a much vaster mechanism: by exhausting them with tedious tasks, making them resent one another, and convincing them that they pose no significant threat, their jailers ensure that they become too resigned to the abusive treatment to deviate from the routine, much less rebel.

Fortunately, the Imperials fail to account for one crucial factor: compassion. Despite his stern exterior, Kino legitimately cares about the men under his supervision, encouraging them to endure their fatigue and despair because he genuinely believes that silent, submissive obedience will guarantee their survival. Thus, when he discovers that their toil is for naught—that the calendar counting down to their scheduled release date is a total fabrication, and they will merely be transferred from factory to factory for the remainder of their natural lifespans—he immediately joins Cassian’s uprising, using the skills that he’s acquired as a foreman to inspire cooperation and unity among his former subordinates:

There is one way out. Right now, the building is ours. You need to run, climb, kill! You need to help each other. You see someone who is confused, someone who is lost, you get them moving and you keep them moving until we put this place behind us. There are 5,000 of us. If we can fight half as hard as we've been working, we will be home in no time. One way out! One way out! One way out!

Once they finally breach the exterior doors, however, Kino reveals that he can go no further: the final stretch of their escape requires them to paddle across turbulent waters, and he never learned to swim. He knew from the beginning that he wouldn’t be able to reach freedom, participating in the revolt solely for the benefit of his comrades—a sacrifice that perfectly mirrors the iconic monologue delivered by Rebel spymaster Luthen Rael during the episode's conclusion:

I burn my decency for someone else's future. I burn my life to make a sunrise that I know I'll never see. And the ego that started this fight will never have a mirror or an audience or the light of gratitude.

When confronted with such altruism, despotism wilts and decays—as all systems of oppression should.

[demoiselettes]

IM BACK FROM THE MITSURI FICS

But this time its not mitsuri

This time goes to the ever so adorable Kamado siblings. Specifically Tanjiro and Nezuko. And yes this is also platonic

Tanjiro is just sitting in Nesuko’s room at the end of the bed. It’s night time so Nezuko is just vibing on the bed with him. But Tanjiro doesn’t feel comfy, more like really awkward due to an adrenaline rush that hasn’t calmed down since he started his official missions from the corps. Because of that he has a hard time falling asleep tonight. A knock from the door comes and in comes reader. She is a older slayer and near the rank of a hashria but cant become Hashria due to there only strictly being nine Hashria (yes that is canon). Even though the meeting was just yesterday, word has already spread out to the entire corps. Tanjiro tenses up ready to defend Nezuko, but reader puts her hands up in a early surrender to calm him down. Reader stands next to the bed and starts giving Nezuko head pats. Reader then starts saying how happy she is for Tanjiro which is odd for him. Normally everyone is mad at him for Nezuko. Reader then says how happy she is Tanjiro is give Nezuko a second chance, some people need a second chance sometimes but don’t get it, even though thats the only thing they need to be better. But Tanjiro is working hard to give Nezuko that second chance she needs from a fate she never deserved. Reader then apologies say this might make him uncomfortable but she is proud of him. But that all he needs. The godddanm reassurance he needed since his family died when he was 13. At the end of the day being a big brother and carrying the burden of pain is one of the hardest jobs in the world. Reader goes in for a hug and Tanjiro clings on for dear life. Nezuko joins in the comfort hug. this hug feels like one a big sister would give, even though he never had one. reader spends the rest of the night comforting the poor child and stays with them until morning comes. She is now an honorary Kamado, reader enjoys taking the siblings out to new places to eat or buy new things for them like good luck charms trying to give them a peaceful life and demon slayer can have

An unusual one

Pairing: Platonic! Tanjiro + Nezuko x reader

Category: fluff

Warning(s)/note(s): fem! Reader, reader is Kinoe ranked

A/n: i was so sad when i read ‘but this time it’s not mitsuri’ then i saw Tanjiro and Nezuko and i was like heck yeah >:D ALSO I FEEL LIKE WE ALL WANNA EITHER DATE OR BE FRIENDS WITH THE KNY CHARACTERS

The barest moonlight filtered trough the curtains.

Nezuko didn’t seem to notice the jitters her brother was suffering from. Sprawled on the twin sized bed, she kept herself busy with positioning her legs to remain upright in the air and swinging them back and forth on the mattress, one feet at a time.

It was an amusing sight for Tanjiro, but tonight he was restless. Many thoughts rushed through his brain. The adrenaline from his mission on Mount Natagumo and the not-so -lovely meeting he’d had with the hashiras proved stubborn and didn’t subside. In his bed, he’d kept shifting his legs, wringing his hands and tossing and turning, but tiny insects kept crawling up his body. So he’d tip-toed out of the room he shared with both Zenitsu and Inosuke in the butterfly estate and snuck into Nezuko’s room. At this hour, she should have been asleep (she slept a lot for a demon), but he’d been greeted with the sight of her wrapped up in bedsheets. Watching her, Tanjiro felt somewhat relived that Nezuko remained carefree and oblivious to what happened. He knew, deep down, that she must be understanding the situation to a certain level but the information simply didn’t fully process. No doubt for the best. Tanjiro didn’t mind being the one carrying the burden and the deaths that trailed behind him.

Knuckles racked against the door, almost startling Tanjiro. Guessing it was probably Aoi who came to check on Nezuko, or perhaps even Shinobu, he rushed to invite them in, already bracing for a scolding. But when the door opened, it was neither Shinobu nor Aoi who stepped in. Tanjiro didn’t even know who you were. But the sword that hung by your belt alerted him enough to hop out of bed and stand in front of his sister. The rush of energy finally kicked it and he was already planning to headbutt you.

But your shoulders tensed and you put your palms up to face level on either side of your head in an attempt to surrender. That was not the reaction he’d been expecting and definitely not the one he’d gotten with the other hashiras. The air smelled of fresh bluebells. Surprisingly, Nezuko remained calm. Her pink eyes trailed over you, but there was a far-away look in them as though you weren’t really present and she was looking directly at the door behind you.

“Ah, good day, Kamado-san! Or, uh, good night..” you seemed to fumble with your words. Your hands were still in the air. “I’m truly sorry for startling you at this hour. I’ve been tied up all day so i couldn’t come visit.”

Tanjiro almost gawked at you. You had none of the intimidating and somewhat eccentric presence the hashiras gave off, you looked..normal. For the most part. He doesn’t remember you being at the meeting. His shoulders slumped in slight relief and he bowed to you, mustering a smile.

“It’s no problem! I couldn’t sleep anyway.. ah, would you like to have seat?” He gestured to the empty stool that sat by the twin sized bed. You clasped your hands and shook your head.

“I’m good. I don’t intend to stay for long. I wanted to simply take a gander at your sister. I take it her name is Nezuko?”

“Y..yes.” Tanjiro was having trouble forming the words. Though he was weary, the smile on your face reminded him of his mother’s. You made no attempt at attacking them and the scent of bluebells assaulted his nostrils.

“It’s the first time i’ve come across such a phenomenon.. have you really not eaten any demons, my dear?” You tilted your head quizzically at the girl. She didn’t answer, only stared at you.

“Ah- sorry, sometimes it’s difficult for her to formulate words! Specially through that muzzle..”

“Oh, that’s right.”

“E-erm..” Tanjiro hesitated. “Is it alright if i ask for your name?”

You turned to him, bewildered. “I haven’t introduced myself yet? I’m [Last Name] [First Name]!” You bowed. “Kinoe ranked Demon Slayer.”

Tanjiro’s head spun. Kinoe rank? That meant you were right below the rank of hashira. He tensed again. Why did you want to see Nezuko?

“Rest assured, i’m not here to kill your sister. I wouldn’t, as The Master has given her his approval to live. I just.. wanted to have a look at the situation with my own eyes..” your voice faded near the end, like you were only speaking to yourself.

He blushed, embarrassed that his thoughts were so evident. “Thank you, [Last]-san.”

You nodded, then you took a tentative step forward. Tanjiro’s eyes never failed to follow, but he remained calm while you approached Nezuko and placed a palm over her head. She closed her eyes in bliss and leaned into your touch. The scene felt so..gentle, so unlike everything that he’s faced for the past couple of years. He smiled without even realizing that he’d let his guard down.

“She’s no demon,” you cooed. “She’s such a cutie.”

He grinned. “I’m happy you accept her. In all honesty..i was expecting you to attack..” his hand went to rub his nape.

You smiled wryly. “I know. You are not very subtle with your body language.” The laugh that followed was enough to make Tanjiro want to bury himself in the ground of sheer embarrassment. “The hashiras gave you a hard time, eh? I’ve heard they’re ruthless.”

“I understand they were doing their job,” Tanjiro admitted miserably. “But i still can’t help somehow feeling upset at how they treated Nezuko. The wind pillar—“

“—is an idiot.” You finished. “But it’s hard for him to trust demons.” You frowned before acknowledging his gaze upon you. “I’m glad Nezuko-chan gets to live.”

Tanjiro swallowed the emotions that threatened to flood. He nodded solemnly and, clenching his fists, added: “Demons are tragic creatures. They.. they deserve a second chance. I know eating humans is unforgivable but..”

You smiled. “I see now why Kocho-sama entrusted her dream to you. You’re a special one, Kamado Tanjiro.”

He gulped and felt himself shrink under your gaze. His cheeks burned. When was the last time he’d been complimented? And you were so kind..

“This might seem out of the blue, but i’m proud of you for standing up for your sister. You’re still a mizunoto, but you’ve got more spirits that i’d have thought.” You forged on. “I barely know you and yet i look forward to fighting alongside you.”

Something resembling warmth bloomed inside Tanjiro’s chest. He felt like he’d eaten a steaming bowl of Udon with grated yam but along the fuzziness came the ball that lodged itself in his throat whenever he’d fight back tears. He was fighting back tears. He felt ashamed, for he was about to cry after you’d just told him he was strong. That was unbecoming of a Slayer. But before he could even blink, droplets were tracing their paths down his cheeks, leaving dark patches on the white uniform and soon, he began to shake and sob violently. He felt arms wrap around him gently, lightly, like he was a glass sculpture and he shook harder. His fingers went to clutch at your uniform and he allowed himself to be given head pats by you. He didn’t need to look up at you to know you were smiling.

He can’t tell what he’s crying for. It seemed that every negative experience, trivial or big, that he’d encountered poured out in his tears. He’s been alone for so long with his struggles. He was still only a kid.

You made no effort to speak comfort into him. Simply holding him, caressing his hair and letting him cry, was proving to be more effective. The silence spoke volumes. A smaller pair of arms came to hold onto you and you looked down, startled, at the shrunken version of Nezuko who had her kimono and haori trailing on the floor behind her. Just like that, you knew they’d taken you in as one of their own.

You remained by their side for the entire night, and somewhere throughout, sleep greeted you in its numbing embrace with Tanjiro and Nezuko still tucked in your arms.

[mizugucci]

hiii everyone im finally posting this after ignoring all my tags for two weeks lmao. i love these kind of games though its fun to look back, so thank you for tagging me:

@floweruna / @hongberries @gnanii @yangsminho and @honeydewtual

rules: link your favorite and/or most popular post from each month this year <3 (it’s totally fine to skip months!) and tag some CCs you love!

im sure most people have already done it, but ill tag some people just to say hi @taegyunie @ambivartence @awek-s @flops @strhwaberries @hwichanis

i added way too much commentary, so this will go under a readmore lmao. also i included ALL gifs including from my gg and fandom sideblogs, not just bgs.

january

favorite: obviously my favorite was my magazine/gif thing i made for kenta's birthday (6th year in a row, this year will be 7) unfortunately it doesnt load very well lol

most popular: these txt gifs (sugar rush ride) and taehyun+stickers

february

favorite: i cant deny i still think about this set of sebin during snuper's rain of mind era... the sparkles will always have a chokehold on me. ps check out my pixy wings set

most popular: this joshua set (for whatever reason lol)

march

favorite: i have several but im rly happy at how the wjsn + butterflies set turned out, its so nice. also my two harry june sets have a soft spot in my heart

most popular: this set of svt aju nice, its not a surprise that when i post svt it gets way more notes lol. i do like it a lot though

april

favorite: by FAR my fav (excluding macarena) is my loona as witches gifset. its one ofmy best im not gonna lie but also.... yuma sunshine...

most popular: actually i had a couple that were fairly popular but uh another joshua gifset has the most but ALSO this blitzers macarena post is nearing 200 notes??? i would consider that a fave too. and apparently tumblr loves big yuto/little yuto the same i do

may

favorite: i outdid myself in my dkz 9 to 5 set here. like idk how it ended up looking good but i love it sm.

most popular: ANOTHER joshua set??? im not even joshua biased. hes just so pretty LOL this is boring ill mention the 2nd most popular too. which is also another boring svt set. NEXT is big yuto/little yuto again <3

june

favorite: i made a gifset pretending fly me to the moon had a m/v and it flopped SO HARD i forget that i actually made it. also not to sneak this one but bitsaeon is SOOOO beautiful

most popular: campus crush junseo was my most popular this month, AS IT SHOULD BE. everyone should love that teddy bear

july

favorite: mmm two horror-adjacent gifsets!!! a set for dreamcatcher's chase me and an au that set kino (ptg) as a horror protag. lol it was so niche but i enjoyed it

most popular: omg i didnt think it would be but junghwan in the move m/v... as it SHOULD BE (again) i was let down a lot by trsr this year but this song kept me interested

august

favorite: mmm probably changsun in heartbeat. i LOVE that song and also it brought me back to 2017. nostalgia is.. very strong lol

most popular: im ignoring yet another joshua set. sorry josh but lets let others have a spot lmao. actually after that, a gifset of jaechan in his pre-release solo has the most notes. thats crazy!

september

favorite: my fav is OBVIOUSLY the set of snuper + sparkles. supposedly i was going to turn it into a series of boys+sparkles but we'll see.

most popular: its kind of funny, it seems like there arent a lot of ptg stans on tumblr but they always crawl out of the woodwork to rb my ptg stuff. i love u guys. and i miss yanan.

october

favorite: another installment in my women+horror series was my fav for this month. girlies gotta love vampires

most popular: i am SO glad. if it is any of my sets to be popular, i would never be disappointed if its omega x. they deserve the WORLD and ill personally give it to them. btw my pics with jaehan and taedong turned out soo well but i look AWFUL with sebin lmaooo

november

favorite: ahhh definitely anthonny in magic hour jacket behind. hes an ICON and i really liked him in bp

most popular: ohhh this was a surprise, i guess bc i only did 4 gifsets in november, but this seowon in wonderland m/v has the most notes. totally valid, hes beautiful

december

favorite: baby... yuma... sunshine loml obviously is my fav. hes sooo cute in that beret. and his smile. oh im gonna cry hes so cute LOOK AT MY SON!!!!!

most popular: i guess kpop has less of a reach on tumblr now because my one and only fandom post has the most notes lol. anyway if you havent seen a journey to love, you really should

a few thoughts:

well, its not a surprise that my most popular were seventeen and txt but it was interesting to see the variety of groups that i did gif besides them

peak time really had (has) a chokehold on me lmaoooo so many sets spawned from that show.

i also giffed more than i thought i had, so that was very neat to discover. although it was funny i posted 4 gifsets in the entirety of november

i talked so much and i apologize but thank you to anyone who even scrolled down this far, thanks for bearing with me!!

[i-write-hurt-not-comfort]

so yesterday after me and a few others finished watching my vampire boyfriend, we got talking about ships and laito and stuff on call. and we had a particularly interesting conversation about laito and his loneliness. i feel like i need to write it down somewhere. 

// typical-laito themes, mentions of suicide and drugs under the cut. this is a long ass post. 

so in my head when i start pairing up everyone in DL, it goes as follows: 

kino gets with yuri, obviously. shin and carla have each other - whether you make that incest or just as brothers keeping each other company, isolated as founders. then you get shu and yuma, reiji and ruki, kou and subaru and i do like azusa and kanato; they are official rivals too. 

that leaves ayato and laito but goddamn, ayayui is my STRONG bias, so i’m gonna take ayato and put him with yui. 

who does that leave? laito. 

laito as a character is SO fuckin lonely. someone said yesterday that he was like a side character in his own routes and yknow what, it’s so painfully true. laito’s routes are so isolated from everyone else. yeah he rivals with kou in more blood but not in the same way as subaru rivals with kou. 

sure, ayato TRIES really hard to get through to laito, in both drama CDs and the games, ESPECIALLY lost eden. but laito generally turns it away. he isolates himself so hard, to the point where he is straight up suicidal and prepared to die so that he doesn’t have to carry the burden of having the powers of the man he hated the most in the whole word. 

until laito fully understands himself, his feelings and his trauma, i don’t think he will ever be able to love somebody. in fact when i look at all of the guys, i genuinely think laito is the only one who i don’t think will ever manage to have a healthy relationship. he might do “his best” but frankly i don’t think his best attempt at loving and trusting yui is enough and she would deserve so much better. 

laito’s existence is a pit - there’s that one quote that diane says in bojack horseman where she says “i’m a pit that good things fall into” or something like that. and damn, yeah, that reminds me of laito. i think back to lost eden when he says “i want you to let me hate you” 

this chronic emptiness is precisely why laito’s routes never feel like laito’s routes. his childhood was stolen and i don’t think he’ll ever get his sense of self back. hell i don’t think he ever developed one. this is one of the major reasons i think he has BPD. 

and this, all this, is why laito as a drug addict makes So Much Goddamn Sense. if he found something which made him feel good, confident and just a little bit more whole, he’d throw himself into it headfirst. and if he dies, he dies. but addiction is lonely. in the long term, it’d make him so much worse. 

laito loses himself very easily in more blood, dark fate and lost eden when bad things set him off. frankly i don’t think he has much of a chance after everything and we definitely see that. 

in fact in his lost eden vampire ending when he resets his existence or something and lives his life with yui without his memories of his mother, it’s pretty interesting that this is the only time he’s ever truly been happy. all the time he’s living in the shadow of what cordelia did to him, i don’t think he has much of a chance at a happy ending. 

thank u for coming to my tedtalk. i could talk about laito for hours. 

[emblemxeno]

Xenoblade Chronicles: Future Connected Thoughts

-Future Connected is 100% done! All quests, all ponspectors, full collectopedia, all Quiet Moments, and full map! For a 10~ hour epilogue, it certainly had its charms.

-Story and characters were extremely good and heartfelt. Melia getting to be unabashedly happy and powerful in her leadership position is a treat to see. Kino and Nene were feel good team mates that brought smiles to my face, and their inclusion led to Riki being developed without even being there! Best dadapon even more so. Shulk's story was over in the main game, so seeing him in a supportive role was not a shock, and he's so damn sweet. And again, Tyrea's story role in this-as well as Teelan being brought in as a full supportive character-was a welcome inclusion, something that I felt was a great bow tied on to XC1's world.

-Side characters were good, for the most part. Surprisingly poignant and nuanced dialogue from named NPCs, as well as welcome funny moments here and there. I enjoyed Maxis and the Companions, as well as their friction with Gran Dell. Were the game to be longer, I'd call it underdeveloped, but since it's as short as it is, it's just fine.

Gael'gar though... kind of weak tbh. He created tension in the story that, IMO, wasn't necessary or impactful. Mixed blood High Entia hating pure bloods as a reversal of the main game's take is an interesting concept, but something that can't meaningfully take hold in a short adventure, especially since the blood heritage thing is woven tightly into the main game's narrative with the Telethia's origins. Gael'gar blowing up the lab was ultimately for naught in my eyes, as yeah it sets back Teelan and Tyrea's research, but reasonably that probably wasn't gonna be solved before the Fog King issue anyway. He lacks threat and charisma either, so he's not even entertaining or engaging, he's kind of just a negative.

-WE MEASURE! FIND TREASURE! PONSPECTORS TIL WE DIE!

I loved those little fuckers, even if some of the quests involving them were annoying. Shout out to the chuuni ponspector, your quest may have been hell, but I loved your dialogue. They were great in the gameplay sense too, adding some meat to the system. Speaking of which...

-I didn't care much for the combat at all. I have an overall really positive opinion on XC1's combat, where even though spikes are an awful design decision and the game is centralized around topple locking, the variety of arts, skill trees and links, and various armors and gems led to a great deal of customization and fun. Future Connected is a short romp, so it makes sense for it to be stripped, but stripping XC1's combat makes one realize that it's not quite that fun in its bare form. Things become a bit more routine or predictable, and I think the devs knew that, so they made enemies a bit more annoying and tanky (I think even one NPC commented that the region's monsters are stronger on the shoulder than they normally would be). Until I got access to the Ponspector Attack, I felt at the mercy of things just playing out with no major impact; like I was a level 60 hero going through the prologue again. It wasn't hard to eventually adjust, but still. Meh.

-Specific point about battling. Getting rid of Enchant makes sense, since no Mechon. However, why not also get rid of Shield and enemy Talent Arts since there's no visions? Shield's main purpose was to stop talent arts before they happen, but with no visions you never know when they're happening ever. At that point, Shield is kind of worthless the first time round, and it becomes trial and error depending on the enemy if you keep dying to it. Most often, the only Monado Art you needed was Armor, since that's more reliable and multipurpose. Just strange.

-What else... music was top notch, I looooooved the Fog Beast theme. Visuals were great, and huge fucking props to breathing life into the Bionis' Shoulder, since that was major cut content in the original Wii release. Repurposing it for an epilogue mini-adventure was a smart move. Exploring the continent itself was fun, so they did a great job. I loved each location, and I oddly enough enjoyed the high concept names for each landmark and the like. Very fantastical.

-Having played XC3, anything and everything about the Fog King and the Rift, like these:

They're such brain candy moments for literature nerds like me, oooh, I love it. The XC3 art book revealed that Alrest had a similar event to Future Connected, just not seen before XC3's events. I imagine, that since FC was a rift above Alcamoth that spouted out a Guldo, then there was most likely a rift in the center landscape of the new Alrest, where Morytha used to be. I like to think Alrest's version of the Fog King would be a Telethia that got caught in the rift.

-Last but certainly not least, JENNA COLEMAN! Getting her back for both Future Connected and XC3 was amazing, and she kills it as Melia. So mature, heartfelt, compassionate, an A+ performance.

-Overall, I had fun! Would I play it again? Ehhh, maybe someday, but whenever I play XC1 again, I'm not likely to revisit FC along with it every time. Still, loved the scenes and what it brought to the overall Xenoblade story.

Taking another break before moving on. Continuing on, I'm gonna play Torna next, then main game XC2. I couldn't be more excited to play those again tbh.

[tarabyte3]

I Want You to Show Me Weak

Fandom: Andor

Pairing: Kino Loy/F!Reader

Chapter 5/27 (4k words)

->start at chapter 1<-

<- Chapter 4 | Chapter 5 | Chapter 6 ->

Summary: You're pretty sure Kino Loy hates you. He screams at you, grabs you, and shoves you against the wall, and it's becoming a problem because, well...it shouldn't fluster you as much as it does.

Warnings: Explicit rating, Smut, Prison, Prison sex, minor non-graphic injuries, Dom/Sub, sexual tension, dirty talk, praise, hair-pulling, light choking, unprotected sex, oral, angst

A/N: You can all have some light smut. As a treat. Work title is from "Poison" by Vaults. Chapter title is from "Bedroom Hymns" by Florence + The Machine . Previous chapter links up above.

AO3 Link

Chapter 5 - Sweating out confessions, the undone and the divine

"Look at those smug assholes at table 3. They're a rack up and they think they're so great, even though there's still two hours left." Taybus throws a large socket wrench down a little too hard and it clatters on the table. Threl straightens up and glares at him.

"I know you're not trying to break shit when there's only two hours left," he scolds.

"If they gave us better tools then we wouldn't have to worry about breaking anything." Taybus pouts as he checks his work.

"They aren't gonna give us better shit, boy." Jevid grunts as he passes Sorrek the hanging drill. "So stop whining about it."

"I'm bored. This shift is taking forever!" He picks the wrench back up to tighten the part he half-assed the first time.

"Are you? We hadn't noticed!" Alis doesn't look up from locking the joint in place opposite you. "What are you in such a hurry for anyway? Got a hot date? Dinner plans? Wanna see how much your mustache has grown since we been in here?"

You can't help but finally crack a smile and you look up to see Alis grin and wink at you.

"I have to take a shit and I already used my second break. If I go back, Kino will kick my ass."

Your face immediately falls at hearing Kino's name, and you hover closer to the table. Alis sighs. He opens his mouth to say something else, but there's the sound of a fist on the table.

"Taybus," Sorrek's voice is stern and angry, "I know things have been tense around here, but this isn't helping."

"They're up one more," Jevid cuts in.

"If you want first place that god-damned badly, then focus on work. That's what will help. What you are doing right now serves no one. So stop it. Now." You look up just in time to see Sorrek give Taybus a thin lipped, angry stare down. Taybus breaks the eye contact first and looks at his feet, dejected. You can't really blame him. It's Sorrek's full disappointed dad voice. Even you feel a little guilty because it's your fault things are so tense in the first place.

"What's gotten into you anyway?" Threl shakes his head.

"His sparring partner isn't up for his shenanigans and he's worried, but doesn't have the emotional capacity to handle it." Alis slaps the top of the part to let Jevid know he's done, and then looks between you and Taybus daring either of you to tell him he's wrong.

"I'm fine," you grumble.

"I am not worried! What's it to me if she's sulking because she got yelled at?"

"Clear!"

You take a step back and glare at Taybus. "Yep, that's me, the giant baby at the table that has never gotten yelled at before. It hurt my delicate womanly feelings."

"Then what the fuck did he do back there? Spank you?" Taybus rolls his eyes, but you feel a wave of hot anger.

"Shut the fuck up, Taybus! Right now." Your usual light tone is missing and everyone, not just Taybus, seems taken aback.

"Hey, sorry, I didn't mean it! I was just trying to make you laugh." He sounds genuine and you know things must be bad if he's actually apologizing. You suddenly feel like an asshole because of course he doesn't know.

"No, I'm sorry." You sigh and look around the table as the next piece clicks into place. "I know I've been miserable to be around. I'm really trying, here. Just...give me time."

Kino walks by at that exact moment, and glances up from his data pad to look over the table. You're the last thing his focus lands on. When his eyes meet yours, there's a flash of something in them. Sadness? Concern? You can't tell, as usual, and you're tired of trying to figure it out. You quickly look away.

"Good work," Kino pats Threl on the shoulder and moves on to the next table.

"Wow, he didn't even yell at us." Any trace of Taybus's humility from being snapped at by the rest of you is already gone. "Being in second place is kind of awesome."

You just grumble, "Give me a lot of time, apparently." The only one that hears you is Alis.

"Want me to shit on his bed for you?" He whispers.

And you can't help it, you howl with laughter. For the first time in too long. It feels nice.

Your table gets second place by less than a rack. You're all a little disappointed you were so close to first, but it's still second place. The mood has been bleak for a while now so you'll happily take the small win. Maybe tomorrow you can actually get first, now that you have a taste for it. Maybe tomorrow you'll start to feel better.

It's that evening, on the heels of your second place victory, that Kino visits you. You're lying in your cell, facing the wall once again, so you don't know he's there at first. Or how long he stands there just watching you. You hope it isn't long so he didn't see the way you hug yourself as you curl your knees to your chest, or hear your little sniffles and world-weary sighs.

"Are you busy?" His voice comes from the doorway of your cell. Your stomach knots and rolls with dread at the sound. It's the first time he's spoken to you since…since The Hallway. With a deep, calming breath, you school your expression into an impassive stare and get up from your cot to stand in the middle of the small room.

"No. I'm not busy," you deadpan. You briefly meet his eyes, but you keep your focus on his shoulder instead. It feels safer that way. He looks the same as he always does, that halfway point between irritable and indifferent, so you're not expecting an apology. Why bother to give yourself that hope?

You expect him to talk to you from the main floor while leaning against your bench. That's what most people do when they chat during freetime. Instead he takes a step directly into your cell. Right before his foot touches the floor, you call out "wait!" and tense with panic, anticipating a shock that never comes, even as he stands before you.

You slowly unclench as you attempt to convince your body it's safe. Then you turn to him, wide eyed in surprise. "How?"

"Manager privilege." He moves to stand in front of you, and he's too close. Not as close as he gets when he's mad, but close enough that you can see every line on his face and darker hair in his beard. The strong angles of his jaw and speckled blue of his eyes. And god, how did you ever look into those eyes and not immediately feel like you're being plunged into water, swept into a wave, and dashed upon rocks? Because this has to be what drowning feels like.

"Oh." You blink at him, trying not to get distracted admiring his worn face, even though you've already failed at it. "I...didn't know you had that as a perk."

He shrugs and says gruffly, "Never wanted to use it before."

You're disgusted by the small thrill in your chest, both at his words and his presence.

"I'm going to guess you would like to talk, then." You want to sound flippant, but can't keep the ache and curiosity out of your voice. You also wrack your brain trying to think of anything you could have done during your shift that could be construed as worthy of a conversation, and nothing comes to mind. You've been very careful.

"You did well today." He takes a step closer. Now he's so impossibly close. You could lift your hand and touch his chest to feel the steady rhythm of his heart if you wanted to. And with dismay you know that you do want to. "In fact, you've been doing well for a while now."

You blink at him again. "What?"

"I thought you deserved to know that I've noticed." He leans in and lowers his voice to that gravelly half whisper. "And it made me realize that I've been so focused on punishment, I haven't given any consideration to how I might reward you."

You jump back like you've been slapped and your legs bang against the raised platform of your bed. Reward? Is he mocking you? Whatever this is, it's cruel and you've officially had enough. You don't deserve this.

"What is this?" Your voice is stern and outraged, and he looks taken aback by your tone and your reaction. "I know you hate me, but I guess I don't understand what the angle is here. To hurt me? To break me?" At that the creases on his forehead deepen in confusion. "If so, mission accomplished."

"I don't hate you." He frowns.

You give a bitter laugh. "Yes you do. You yell at me all the time." You lift your chin in challenge, daring him to refute it. You want to say more, to throw the rest of it in his face, but you don't trust yourself to not start sobbing or screaming or to push him out of your cell.

"I have to keep order on the floor. If I don't, they fry all of us as punishment. I yell at anyone that's disruptive. You just happen to have been particularly disruptive lately," he says, as if that should be obvious. As if he doesn't understand why he has to say it out loud.

You lean back, trying to create space between you to process that. And he's right. You have seen him yell at other people before. It's different with you, though. You know it is. "But you don't…grab anyone else like you've grabbed me."

His eyes flicker to your lips when you mention grabbing you and you watch a brief glimmer of heat appear on his face. If you hadn't been watching him so closely, you would have missed it.

"I suppose I don't, do I?"

What?

Wait.

What?!

Your heart pounds alarmingly against your ribcage, then, because that small action brings you a moment of absolute clarity:

"They aren't allowed to bother you." Every thing he's said to you. "Says me." Every piece you've been missing. "I know what she needs." Every double meaning of conversations you weren't privy to. "Are you going to behave?" Every damn shred of context. His nose brushing against yours as he holds you against the wall. It all slots into place in your mind, like stepping back from a puzzle to view a full picture. You see. Finally. He doesn't hate you.

Kino Loy wants to fuck you.

You have to sit down.

It's only after you sit that you realize you said that out loud. He's standing in front of you, waiting patiently.

"I didn't say you could sit."

And, oh God. You've just realized what this is. What you've been doing this whole time.

"Fuck," you swear under your breath. You know at that moment you have a choice to make. You can stay sitting and walk away. You can end this and heal and move on with time. You can try to resume what little semblance of a life you had in here. Or you can stand up.

You also know this isn't even a choice for you. There was only ever one outcome when it came to him.

You stand back up so you're face to face with him. He smiles at you, and it is triumphant and ruthless. He's been waiting for this.

Then he lessens the gap between you, but doesn't close it. His mouth hovers near yours, and though it's something he's done before, it is an entirely new and intoxicating sensation now that you realize what it fucking meant. That he enjoys it just as much as you do. That he's into it. A shiver travels down your spine from your neck to your tailbone, and overflows deliciously to your core.

"Stop me if at any point I'm wrong," he growls. "The first time I grabbed you, you liked it." You take a quivering breath, but don't say anything. "When I pushed you against the window you liked it even more." Your tongue darts out to unconsciously lick your lips as you remember just how close he had gotten and how you thought he might kiss you. His own lip curls into a gratified smile at your continued silence. "But when I grabbed your face and humiliated you in private? You liked that best of all."

You swallow hard because despite how much it hurt you emotionally, physically you fucking loved it. "You know I did."

"I wanted to hear you say it." His mouth ghosts against yours, a phantom of a kiss.

"Were you pushing me to see how far you could take it before I would break?"

"Not break," his voice rumbles, "surrender."

You shiver at the word. At the implication of the word. "If I didn't figure it out and continued to sulk, what then? What was next?"

"Do you really want to know, or do you want me to save it?" He tucks a strand of hair behind your ear, and you have to fight to remain upright and focused.

"Would it be my reward for behaving?" You're panting now and your entire body feels like an overstimulated, exposed nerve.

He gives you a smug, hungry gaze. "I told you I realized you don't respond to yelling."

You whimper and desperately want to press against him, to bring your bodies flush together, to touch him, but you stay where you are. You behave. "Save it."

"Does that mean you want this?" He lets the very tip of his nose brush your cheek.

"Yes," you gasp.

"Say it."

"I want this, Kino." You quickly bite your lip to stifle a moan. "Fuck, have I wanted this."

"I thought you may have. Now do me a favor and be very quiet for me." He shifts on his feet to further block the view from the other cells.

You give him a dazed look and manage to get out "what?" before his hand is running through your hair and he's massaging your scalp. It feels remarkable because it's touch, but more specifically it's his touch. You lean into his fingers like a lothcat, seeking more, and he rewards you with a slow drag of his nails. Some of the tension you had been holding on to for weeks at this point starts to melt away.

Just when you're ready to smile lazily up at him, his hand tightens around a large fistful of your hair. Then he wrenches your head back, exposing your neck to him. You start to cry out, but the sound dies almost immediately when you remember what he said to you.

"Very good," he purrs in your ear before moving to breathe against your now vulnerable throat. "You don't want to draw attention to this, do you?"

"No," you whimper.

"I don't think your table would appreciate it, would they? What would they think of you if they saw you whining and eager for this?" He lightly drags his scruffy cheek along your sensitive skin.

You feel a surge of arousal in response, which causes you to redden in shame. They can never know about this. About him, yes, but never this. This is yours. He tilts his head until his lips graze your neck as he talks.

"If they knew how wet you are right now, just from my hand in your hair?" He squeezes his fist to emphasize his point and you gasp. "Because you are, aren't you?"

"Yes," you choke out.

"Are you going to touch yourself later and think about me?" You swallow down the groan that nearly escapes your mouth. The tip of his nose traces your jawline and you feel your knees go weak, but he holds you steady. His hand is an anchor while you stand there in your cell, the backs of your knees against your bed.

"I will," you arch against him, breathless. "I do." He pauses, fighting to maintain control of himself after your admission. Feeling bold you add, "Do you want to know what I think about?"

There is a twitch of his lips against your throat, then he slowly resumes the near touch of his exploration. "Tell me," he sounds more unbalanced than before.

"I think about you fucking me in that hallway with your hand still on my jaw and my throat." He grunts and rests his forehead against your cheek for a moment.

"Fuck," he pants. "You don't make this easy for me, do you?"

"No," you whisper back, "I intend to make it very hard."

He wrenches on your hair again and you're expecting it, but the sting still causes a swell of pleasure between your legs.

"I'm going to have to come up with something to keep your mouth occupied, aren't I?" You gasp and lick your lips. "I take it you like that idea."

"Yes," you moan as quietly as you can.

"Are you going to think about it later with your hands down the front of your pants?" He runs his rough, fuzzy cheek against your neck again, but harder this time so that it burns.

"Yes, Kino." You're so lost in sensation that your words are almost inaudible.

"Do you think about anyone else when you touch yourself?"

"No," you hiss, "only you." You vow it with such ferocity that you almost don't recognize your own voice.

He hums in approval and rewards you with firm, open mouthed kisses below your ear. They trail down your neck and his tongue laps hungrily at your skin. Just when you've adjusted to the feeling enough to stop squirming, he nips at your throat and your eyes close in rapture. In that moment, everything you know and everything you are is bliss.

"You did so well," he praises. His fingers immediately relax in your hair, and he's tenderly massaging your scalp and hovering before you once more. Your muscles are weak, there's a dampness between your legs, and you crave more.

You also know he's not going to give it to you. You're going to have to work for every touch. For now, reward is caress. It's a kiss. Soon it will be stroking and touching until he finally fucks you. Punishment is humiliation and none of that. And god, do you want him to reward you.

"Thank you." You turn your head so you can nuzzle your face against his arm.

"You understand now?"

"I do," you sigh.

"And you still want this?"

"I want this," you insist.

"If at any point you don't, you tell me. Because you are not powerless here. I want your surrender and your devotion, but only if you give them to me. Do you understand?"

"I understand, Kino." The word devotion sets your mind and nerves alight, makes you ache and tingle. You look into his eyes so he knows you mean it. They're so wide and blue and beautiful. It's almost as if you can see the sky again. He fills you with such warmth that you want to bask in front of him like he's the sun.

He softens and his other hand delicately cups your jaw, which is so different from the last time his hand was on your jaw. You're nearly overwhelmed by all of the affection he's giving you after feeling nothing but misery for too long. "I'm sorry you didn't before. That was my fault. I really thought you did because the way you came undone in my hands…" he takes a shaky breath, "but I should have made sure. That will never happen again."

Then he kisses you—truly kisses you. Lightly at first, adjusting to the touch of your lips and how you slot together, which sets your mind reeling and draws another whine from your throat. And that would have been enough because Kino is kissing you and you're allowed to finally wrap your arms around him. To touch him. To feel his hands gripping your waist and running a long your hips. It would have been everything, but when you moan against him, he deepens it, tasting you and letting his tongue slide against yours.

It isn't reward or punishment. It's just him, and it's an apology. One you know you deserve. You want to lose yourself in it, to never stop kissing him and letting your hands roam over his back and shoulders, but too soon he pulls away. When he looks at you, his lips are red and kiss swollen against the grey of his beard. You can't help but groan at the sight. To wonder what he looks like further wrecked.

"Do you…?" You trail off, suddenly shy. Which is silly, you think, considering what just transpired between you. But there's still a part of you that hasn't accepted he doesn't hate you. That needs to absorb this.

"Do I what?" There's an amused look on his face.

He doesn't hate you, you tell yourself. He knows. He knows and he wants you.

"Do you touch yourself and think about me?" You whisper.

"Every night." He growls and presses your foreheads together.

"When?" You sigh into the touch. "How long?"

"The first time I grabbed you and just held you there. I had intended to yell at you, but god, you were trembling and writhing, and making this little noise in your throat. Every thought I had then was gone. I just stared at you, thinking about what other sounds I could coax out of you."

"Oh," you gasp because he could have fooled you. Did, in fact. He was so stoic. "I didn't realize what it did to me at the time. Was I that obvious?" You cringe thinking about how it must have looked to everyone else.

"It was to me." His voice is a husky rasp.

"Good." You can feel another surge of arousal between your legs.

"Unfortunately, I should go now. It's getting late and it will be a hot floor soon. Everyone at your table will be returning to their cells any minute." He sounds regretful, at least.

"Okay." You sag a little in disappointment and look down at the floor because you just got this and you don't want to let it go yet.

"Hey." He places a finger under your chin so that you are forced to look him in the eye. "Continue to behave. I'm always watching." He gives you a hungry smile. "And I can come back tomorrow."

You nod, your disappointment fading away at the promise of more. "You know I will."

Before he leaves your cell, he pauses and looks at you over his shoulder. "You really thought I hated you?"

"Yes." You say without hesitation.

"What did you think was happening then?"

"That you knew how I reacted and how I felt, and you were humiliating me out of cruelty. To get me to listen." He flinches and you know it hurts him to hear, but you aren't trying to cause him pain. It's simply a truth that had hurt you to go through. You don't want anything left unsaid.

He looks at you with an expression of profound conviction, one so open and sincere that you could never doubt it for a moment. "Never cruelty."

It's breathtaking, and you wonder why he scowls at all. You give him a nod because now you believe him. Now you know the truth. Satisfied, he exits your cell.

Later that night, you do exactly as promised. You slip your hand into the waistband of your pants when everyone else is asleep, wondering if he's down the hall doing the same. You think about his hand clamped around your jaw and twisted in your hair. Think about him pressing you into the wall, his lips on yours, the feel of his tongue. What would have happened if no one else had been looking? Would he have taken you against the window? Pushed you to your knees? You think about supplicating yourself before him and showing him just how devoted you can be.

NEXT CHAPTER->

[toujokaname]

Get Along / Episode 2

Author: Kino Seitaro with Akira

Characters: Tatsumi, Hokuto, Arashi, Kanata, Hiyori

"...What a disappointment."

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Location: Old Seisoukan Building

Season: Winter

Time: That night.

Tatsumi: Now that we have decided on the bathing schedule and the division of household chores, let's finally decide on the beds for each of us.

Since there are two bunk beds, only one person will have to use a futon on the floor―

If it's alright with you, I'll sleep on the futon, so please decide where you all want to sleep.

Hokuto: No. I'll take the floor.

When I stayed overnight at school, I often slept on the floor.

Also, I've been wondering since the SS preliminaries in Hokkaido, but your leg isn't completely healed, is it?

Tatsumi: My apologies. Your concern is greatly appreciated.

If it's about that old injury, there's nothing to worry about. But since you're generously offering me a bed, I shall take the bottom bunk.

Kanata: Then, I will take the "top bunk"~♪ If I don't feel the steam of the "humidifier", I will "dry up".

"Ohisama"-san will also take a "top bunk", right?

Hiyori: Of course! As the leader, I want to be in a position where I can watch over everyone ♪

Arashi: Fufu. Then I'll take the other bottom bunk.

Now that all the assignments have been decided smoothly, let's enjoy our life living together from today ♪

Time: Two hours later.

Tatsumi: Excuse me, Kanata-san. Could you please leave the bath soon?

I'm the last one, so I don't mind having to do it later, but it's going to be bedtime if you don't finish taking your bath shortly.

Kanata: Wah, is it already this "late"?

I am sorry, for taking a long "bath"...♪

Puka, puka... splaaash...♪

Tatsumi: Um. Kanata-san, are you perhaps playing in the bath again...?

Kanata: Fufufu. It's not like that~ Just a little bit more...♪

Arashi: .........

(Hmm... I can't fall asleep like I usually do. Maybe it's the different pillows and bedding.)

(Or is it because of this feeling... that some noise is disturbing my sleep? It sounds strangely familiar...)

Hokuto: (Whisper) "Please... Listen to my wish! This is our last critical moment...!"

Arashi: Mm...?

Hokuto: "Do something... It's the last thing I'll ask for, for the rest of my life!"

Arashi: Hold on, Hokuto-chan. Are you reading the script from under the covers?

I can hear your voice all the way over here. It's late, so let's go to sleep early and get ready for tomorrow.

Hokuto: So you were awake, Narukami.

I know it's better to go to bed early, but... The practice period is short, and the main task this time is to read out loud. So I ought to devote my efforts to that.

Arashi: I understand how you feel, but it's hard to sleep when someone's mumbling in the middle of the room, isn't it?

Your voice is so clear that it makes me feel like someone's chanting Buddhist prayers in the middle of the night.

Hokuto: I see. I'm reluctant to do so, but if you can hear me even from under the covers, I don't have a choice. I'll go outside to practice.

Arashi: Uugh. Cold, cold, cold... Hokuto-chan, could you please shut the door?

Sigh. Now all my sleepiness is gone. Hopefully this won't happen again...

Hiyori: Myy. Though winter mornings are a little chilly, they are also refreshing!

I usually wake up alone, so it's a new experience to be woken up by someone else, isn't it?

Tatsumi: Haha. I haven't woken up a roommate since sharing a dorm with Aira-san. Perhaps due to my hesitation, I had a surprisingly difficult time.

But. If you don't mind, please leave the task of waking you up for the rest of the week to me. That much will be a piece of cake.

As a senior, I had to straighten up, too. When I was in this old building, I remember that I made it a habit to go to bed early and wake up early.

I have a radio recording with Arashi-san today, and I'd like to take the opportunity to talk about our Shuffle Project with her ♪

Arashi: Yaaawnnn...

Tatsumi: Oh my. Arashi-san, that was quite the big yawn.

Everyone else is awake, but perhaps you're not so good in the mornings? Fufu, it's a new side of you that I wouldn't have known about without this training camp.

Arashi: It's so not like that. I just couldn't get to sleep until late last night.

Ah, jeez~ It's the worst way to wake up. At least I can cover it up with makeup.

Today I have a guest appearance on Kazehaya-senpai's radio show, so I'll go to the bathroom, wash my face, and cheer up...

Kanata: Arashi~ Can you please get out of the way?

Today is an incredibly "dry" "day". If I dry up, I will die...

Arashi: I'm sorry, but I just started my skincare routine...!

Can't you wait just a bit longer? Your lessons don't start until the afternoon, so let me have priority.

Kanata: Ehh~...?

Hokuto: Shinkai-senpai. I'm sorry, but may I use the bathroom next? I have school today, so I must get ready soon.

Kanata: Uuu~... Understood. "Tardiness" is strictly forbidden, after all.

Siigh... I miss the water...

I know. There's a "shower" next door, right? I will use the "shower"...♪

Hokuto: Wha-?! Turn off that shower right now, Shinkai-senpai! You're spraying water all over here!

Ghh, now I won't make it to school on time...!

Kanata: Ah. I'm sorry, it seems I made a "mistake".

Tatsumi: (...Hmm. It looks like we're not at all in sync. I suppose it's difficult for temporary units to create a sense of harmony.)

(I had actually prepared sandwiches for everyone to have for breakfast. But from the looks of things, it seems it'd be best to wait and see how things go for a while.)

Hiyori: ...What a disappointment.

―And this Shuffle Unit was supposed to be my last job.

Tatsumi: Oh? Hiyori-san, did you say something?

Hiyori: Nope. Just talking to myself! No need for you to know!

More importantly, shouldn't the remaining members have breakfast together? After all, running on an empty stomach would ruin the atmosphere!

Tatsumi: Ah, yes. Shall we do that, Hiyori-san? Since I was just preparing breakfast―

Tatsumi: .........

(I thought I heard Hiyori-san say "last job" just now. Did I mishear him...?)

(But, I'm certain I heard it...)

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[e-the-village-cryptid]

episode 10 man. I don't even have words rn. One way out. I burn myself to make a sunrise that I know I'll never see. I loved Kino's development but oh god what happens to him now. They really did that together huh. I don't even care what time it is, I'll finish andor tonight. And then I'll rewatch it a billion times.

EPISODE 10

SO GOOD. SO SO SO SO GOOD

THE MONOLOGUES IN THIS EPISODE. KINO. LUTHEN. ASDLKASDFKL. THEY ALL DID THAT TOGETHER. YES. AND KINO DID THAT DESPITE KNOWING HE WOULD NEVER GET OUT

I'm so excited you've gotten to this point!!!! They did that. They did that. Ahhh it's hard to say more stuff because I wanna say spoilers but please tell me when you finish and we can talk about the whole show!!!! Episode 12 is the single best hour of television I have ever seen in my life I am SO excited for you to experience it for the first time

[sabraeal]

Oh god, how could I forget? *slams hands on table* OBI AND SHIRAYUKI COME OUT TO EACH OTHER, WFB EDITION

[Read on AO3]

There's a surreality that clings to the corners of her night, a certain strangeness that fuzzes the edges like one of Kiki's filters. If Shirayuki's truthful with herself-- which she tries to be-- the whole weekend has been like this, like her body has been wrapped in bubble-wrap, a buffer between her and Tanbarun to keep it from hurting her again. And then for one moment, cheap beer had sloshed against her finger and she thought, I can handle this, it won't beat me, I won't flinch thinking of home forever.

Hard to believe that was only a few hours ago, when now the only thing keeping her upright is the door at her back. That once again, Raj has muted her world. Not on purpose, not like last time; oh no, it's his honesty that wounds, and she can't hate him for it, but she can't forgive either, and he--

Ah, well, maybe Obi has a point. Some things, he's said, his sharp smile strained from holding it so wide, belong right where they're buried.

Her legs don't tremble as she stands, but the ground's so unsteady beneath her feet it makes no difference. Her world pitches with every step across the vintage hardwood, a struggle to stay upright until her world tips at it edges, landing her flat on the mattress. A nice one, firmer and more supportive than the one back in her dorm, even if she had spent thirty dollars layering enough toppers on it to make as nice as a hotel. It would be easy to slip into sleep now, to let this day be drowned out by dreams with a better narrative structure than real life.

But she can't. Not when her mind is racing still, running through Raj's confession like a hamster on a wheel, churning it over and over until she's unmoored. Her body may physically remain in this room, but she no longer sees the crown molding around the ceiling or french doors to the balcony-- instead she witnesses a night three months behind her, every detail blown to life-size.

Hey, Red. His eyes were glazed, she remembers that. From drinking, she'd thought; just a brother three sheets to the wind, press-ganged into one last delivery that kept him from the keg. Raj said he wanted you to have this.

The man doesn't even blink at his lie, just holds out the cup the way anyone would; two lives destroyed with as much ease as hands touch. Doesn't bother to stay either, the way a real villain would, ready to gloat over his dastardly plans. No, evil occurs without even a flinch, unremarkable in its ordinariness. That she believed it all is a simple mistake, one that anyone could have fallen for--

But Obi hadn't. He took one look at that man and called him a shark, laughed at how no one had seen it when blood chummed in his wake. And if he could, then why, why hadn't she?

If she'd only known, then it wouldn't have been Raj in Kino's exposé, and it wouldn't have been Shenezard lawyers that sat across the table from her, explaining to her in terrifying detail the penalties for slander and libel. No, they would be sitting beside her, coaching her through her testimony, making sure that she knew just where to twist the knife. Anything to make sure the campus-- and their investors-- knew that they were washing their hands of this criminal, the frat severing ties with the brother whose actions threatened their charter. It wouldn't have been easy, but she could have stayed, and she--

She never would have met Zen. Or Kiki, or Mitsuhide. Not even Obi, unless there was a dean as dedicated to meddling with Shenezards as much as Wisterias. Shirayuki would still be in her grief single, struggling to get out of bed as her single friend rode her trauma to a post-graduate position.

Her thoughts race, one what-if chasing another, a glut of almosts poised to flood her with second guesses, castigating her for not thinking so clearly, so perfectly in the moment--

It’s-- it’s too much.

This is hardly the first time she’s flirted with a panic attack, but to have one here, pressed in by the walls of the house where it all happened--

Shirayuki gets up. Fresh air. That’s what she needs. A change of scenery. A possibility of escape. Sure, she’s on the second floor, but that’s never stopped her before. Her legs won’t tremble, but her hands do as they reach out for her cardigan, the wool snagging on her nails before she manages to wrangle it around her shoulders.

The night is bracing when she steps into it, not windy, but cold, the air carrying more winter than she expects. They’d left snow behind in Clarines, but Tanbarun’s only been brisk, cushioned by the Sound to the south. Sea effect, that’s what it’s called.

“So.” She jumps, and oh, there’s Obi right there, lounging on his own balcony, blanket framing his grin. “Did catharsis live up to the hype or whatever?”

“Oh.” Had it really only been this morning when she stood in the library, preaching to him about narrative closure? When she’d called this whole thing the return of the hero? “I don’t think-- I mean, I wasn’t--”

“Hold up, Doc.” His blanket slumps to his shoulders, hands flying up between them. “You don’t need to tell me shit. Just...you’re feeling better, right?”

“I...” am about to have a panic attack, she nearly says, but even as she lines up the words to be dismissed-- he doesn’t need to be worrying about her, not over something like this-- she finds they’re not longer true. “...I am. Or at least I will be. Just...need a few minutes I think.”

He shrugs. “Take ‘em. I’m not going anywhere.”

For once, she believes it. “I’m sorry. I should have told you about...all this. What happened here before--”

“Hey, hey.” The blanket unfurls as he stands, caught only by a quick clasp of his hand. “This whole thing was your secret to keep. You didn’t owe me anything.”

“But you walked into all this blind.” She sighs, breath misting into the night. “If I’d told you...”

“I’d be here anyway. Would I like to have known?” He scrapes out a laugh, jostling her elbow on the rail. “Yeah, sure. But it wouldn’t have changed anything? Nah.”

“R-really?” She blinks, the cold stinging her eyes. “But why...?”

“Because you asked, didn’t you?” There’s a sharpness to his smile, but that edge is pointed inward, pressing just hard enough draw blood. “I don’t know if you’ve noticed, Doc, but people don’t tend to expect a lot from me. No one but...”

You. He doesn’t say it, but it rings in the air between them, warming it more than any breeze.

“If you want to let me in on the backstory next time, I won’t stop you though.” His eyes glitter gold in the moonlight, like lights in a distant window. “Beats wondering why you jumped every time you heard a door slam in this place.”

“O-oh!” It hadn’t even crossed her mind that anyone would notice, let alone-- “S-sorry. To make you worry. What did you think--?”

“Doc, I’m gonna be real.” His chin slants down, eyes fixing on her from their corners. “I tried real hard not to think anything at all.”

Shirayuki blinks. “Even though...?”

His shoulders don’t so much shrug as fence him in, pickets right up by his ears. “I’ve seen some stuff. I just had to hope that none of it happened to you.”

He can’t want her to pry, but Obi talks about himself so little, and his past even less; she can’t help but murmur, “Stuff?”

His breath plumes over the rail, spinning and spiraling, each second of his sigh eddying into the next. “Let’s just put it this way: if it’s been me in your shoes tonight, I would have had to think a lot harder before I did the right thing. Would have gotten there eventually, but...”

This time he does shrug, too innocent for his implication. “Kino may not exactly be nice, but that doesn’t mean she deserves to be--”

“No one deserves that.” There’s not much Obi’s serious about, but he is for this, no hint of humor clinging to his mouth or hiding behind his eyes. “Preaching to the choir. But some people need a taste of their own medicine, and I’m not above letting them take a sip.”

“Obi.”

“So to speak, of course.” One hand lazily lifts from the rail, matching the hook of his smirk. “I’m not as good a person as you, Doc.”

“I don’t know about that,” she huffs, folding her cardigan tighter over her chest. “You just don’t know her like I do. When we were in high school...”

We were friends. That’s what she wants to say, at least, but it sits sour on her tongue, aging as well as milk. They’d been on the same team, sure, but when it’d come to those sleepovers, all the seniors gossiping behind their hands--

Obi’s smile softens. “Taking off some real vintage rose-colored glasses?”

“Ah, no.” She shakes her head. “More like...seeing past an old crush.”

“Oh.” It’s strange to be so close to a smile like his as it collapses, like watching one of Oma’s souffles deflate from Opa taking them out too soon . “Huh. I...hm.”

It takes a moment for her head to catch up with her mouth, to realize what she’s said, and-- “Ah, I mean...you knew that right? That I...?”

“Haah, well--” he scrubs sheepishly at his scruff, the bristle of his hair sticking up every which way-- “Kino did day something like that, but I wasn’t sure if I...er...should take that with a grain of salt...”

“She knew?” Her voice splits to shrill before she can catch its frantic fray. “I mean, I just-- that doesn’t matter. I thought you would already know, since Kiki...?”

“Yes.” His nod is almost formally stiff, the kind waiters have at the restaurants Zen takes them to. “I did. But thinking Princess is hot is just good taste. I wasn’t sure if you-- if that was a thing, or if you were--?”

“It is.” She can’t see herself, but she feels her cheeks burning, impulse plowing her forward as her courage starts to wear thin. “I am. I mean, I like both. Guys and girls. Always have.”

“Oh.” Stream streams from his lips, his fingers clutches just as pale around the rail. “You just came right out and said it, huh? That’s...good. Ah, I mean...it’s cool?”

His shoulder make a stiff horizon above his back, spine so straight it makes her own ache.

“Is that going to be okay?” It’s strange how soft she speaks, how tentative the tiptoes around her real question. “It’s not going to change anything for you?”

His head snaps up, eyes wild as they meet hers. “What? No-- what? Of course not. It’s just-- fuck, I’m really making a mess out this, huh?-- I’m not just to talking about it. This.”

Obi makes some gesture between them, a waggle of fingers that’s both confident and a call for help, and she-- she blinks. “I wasn’t trying to hide it, if that’s what you were thinking. I just...it never seemed special or anything until other people found out in high school, so I don’t really think about saying anything. If it makes you uncomfortable--”

“No, it’s not--” he gasps, frustrated more flushed than she’s ever seen him-- “I-- Me too.”

Shirayuki stares. “You like girls?”

“No!” His eyes widen. “No, wait, yeah. Obviously. Girls are hot. It’s just-- guys are good too. I mean, hot. For me. Personally.” His fingers pinch at his shoulder. “Ugh, this sounded better in my head.”

“Oh.” Her mouth pulls wide, so much it aches, but in the best way. “You mean you’re bisexual?”

“No! Wait.” His knuckles blanch bone-white where they grip the railing between them. “I mean yes. Bisexual, yeah.”

“Yes?”

“Can you just--” he puts his back to her, waving weakly over his shoulder-- “give me a minute?”

“I...” Shirayuki’s not quite sure what’s going on, but it’s-- it’s good. She knows that much. The sort of good that makes her feel as big as Mitsuhide, like she could wrap them around the world twice over and give it a squeeze. “Yes. Sure?”

“It’s just...” The tension slumps out of his shoulders, leaving a quivering mound of Obi leaning against the balustrade. “I don’t think I’ve ever said that out loud. No where anyone could hear, at least.” He huffs, mist disappearing before it can waft above his shoulders. “It’s weird.”

“But you said it.” She should give him his privacy, let him be unperceived, and yet-- yet she just grins at his back. There’s a warmth in her chest, one her smile can’t control, only hold at bay. “And you said it to me.”

“Don’t read into that!” he yelps, clambering to face her. “It’s not like I meant to-- that you-- ugh, it just never seemed...”

“Welcome?” she offers, threading her hands between his on the rail.

He sighs, too close for steam. “Relevant. But here we are, I guess.”

“Yeah.” She can’t suppress her giggle. “Here we are. Two bi--”

“Cut it out,” he groans, but he can’t hide his laugh beneath it, no matter how much he tries. “It’s fine, I guess. At least now I know I never really had a chance with you.”

She blinks up at him. “What?”

“Well you know...” His grin is far too sly for comfort. “Since you have a thing for blonds.”

“Huh?” Her jaw drops, distorting the sound. “I-- I don’t! I’ve never had any physical preferences whatsoever.”

“Oh, so you don’t know about it.” His grin spreads wider, like a cookie that should have spent more time in the fridge before she let it run wild at 350. “Princess? Chief? This Kino chick? You’re telling me they don’t all have one thing in common?”

It’s with a terrible certainty that she remembers: Pavo’s blond too. A detail she’ll take to her grave now. “Looks don’t matter to me.”

“That’s not what the data says, Doc.” Obi lets loose a whistle that puts every hair up on end. “Bossman better keep you away from the Big Cheese, huh? Who knows what you’ll do.”

She snatches her hands back from the rail. “Keep my hands to myself, clearly.”

“Sure, sure.” He leans back, hips settling against his own balustrade, near where she hunches on hers. The stars are bright above them, the way they only get when it’s cold, like little chips of diamond in velvet. “Bet you’re wishing he was here, huh?”

“Izana?”

“Nah, nah. Funny that’s where your head went though.” His shoulder nudges hers, and she allows herself a glower, as a treat. “I meant Zen. Boyfriends are probably better for this whole trauma thing, instead of...whatever I’m suppose to be.”

She leans back, watching him. “That wasn’t what I was thinking.”

“That’s because you’re too nice,” he tells her, grin not sitting quite right on his lips. “I bet he misses you, you know? We’ve only been here a few days, but it feels like forever. I think I might even miss him snapping at me.”

Shirayuki blinks, the last puzzle piece slipping into place. Guys are good too, for me, Obi had said, just moments ago, and now here he is, conjuring Zen between them. It’s sweet, really. “He’s probably missing us just as much.”

Obi rolls his head across his shoulders to hand-deliver his glare. “Doc, this is where you’re supposed to say you miss him.”

“Oh?” She wasn’t aware there was a script for sharing crushes. “Am I? I didn’t know.”

“Yeah, while you gaze all wistfully up at the stars.” He juts a hand in their direction. “It’s a whole thing with star-crossed lovers.”

Her brow furrows. “We’re not lovers. And if we were, I certainly wouldn’t want to be star-crossed.”

“Well, you’re close enough on both counts. Anyway.” He levers himself up from the rail. “I should get to bed. You too, Doc. All good little scientists need their eight hours.”

“It’s seven to eight, depending on the length of your sleep cycle.” She looks back to meet his amused expression. “But, er, thanks. I will. Goodnight, Obi.”

He hesitates, one hand wrapped around the jamb. “Night, Doc.”

And just like that, he’s gone; just her and a hundred thousand flaming light glinting over her head. Shirayuki takes in a deep breath, letting the chill prickle at her lungs.

“We can do this,” she murmurs, fingers cold when she curls them into her palms. “I mean, what else could go wrong?”