#kind of a weird assortment LMAO

[ao-ninja]

i got tagged by @lunar-gltch and @werewolfcandy !!!

rules: shuffle your "on repeat" playlist and post the first ten songs, then tag ten people

1) Heaven Help Us - My Chemical Romance

2) Comme Des Garçons - Rina Sawayama

3) Cake By The Ocean - DNCE

4) I Walk the Line - Johnny Cash

5) Take Me Home, Country Roads - John Denver

6) STARSTUD - Matt Watson

7) Cupid - FIFTY FIFTY

8) Zenryoku Zenkai! Zenkaiger - Takeshi Tsuruno

9) Break the Chain - Tourbillion

10) It’s a Sin - Eddy Arnold

and i’m not gonna tag anyone bc everyone i would tag has already been tagged LMAO but if anyone wants to do it you can say i tagged u <3

[unproduciblesmackdown]

omgg lol [guy who won't stop going "more like scapeGOATED" voice] now hold! on!! lmao [same guy just saw encanto voice] Hold on!!!

[world0fmadness]

⋆ ˚｡⋆ ✩ ˚ MIKU X MERCEDES

george russell x anonymous vocaloid creator! reader

featuring: miku luck and miku love

faceclaim: assorted but mainly hatsune miku

୨୧ i’m aware that hatsune miku has been around around for quite a while and a bunch of other stuff but for like, the 4th time, this is fanfic, i am bending the lore because i can! so in this, you’re just a girl who created miku <3 kind of a crack fic but also not! i know someone probably wouldn’t be able to stay anonymous posting pictures of themselves blurred but just go with it

mercedes and hatsunemiku: looks like we have a new partner! welcome to the family miku 🦋

oldf1lvr: MIKU GIRL WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?!

lewishamilton ✔️: lovely meeting you miku!

❤️ liked by mikumangement, georgerussell and hatsunemiku

> georgerussell ✔️: i reckon you have to stop posting thirst traps now, can’t have my miku seeing those can we?

❤️ liked mikumanagement

> mikumylove: “my miku”… i can’t 😭

> iluvf1: he’s not the step father, he’s the father that STEPPED UP!

mikuworldomination: i fear f1 fans are simply not prepared for the power of miku…

❤️ liked by mikumanagement and georgerussell

georgerussell ✔️: i reckon great things are gonna come from this! welcome miku ❤️

> f1forlife: george, be for real 😭

> georgerussells: george #1 miku fan, let’s go

> oldf1lvr: his girlfriend literally created her, of course he loves her

lewishamilton1: have i shifted into some weird alternative reality? what the fuck is this? i need to go back to sleep

mikumylove: MIKU FT LEWIS HAMILTON WHEN?

❤️ likes by mikumanagement, hatsunemiku and lewishamilton

f1forever: WHAT THE FUCK IS THE SECOND PICTURE LMAO

> lovemyf1dilf: you’re laughing… toto wolff has met hatsune miku and you’re laughing?

landonorris ✔️: should’ve been mclaren 💔 still love you miku

> georgerussell ✔️: sorry mate! miku doesn’t really like orange 😬

❤️ liked by mikumanagement and hatsunemiku

> landonorris ✔️: 😔

> iluvf1: lando norris hatsune miku fan confirmed

mikumanagement: did you guys hear that miku is partnering with mercedes? pretty cool news, if i do say so myself 💕 🌸 🍬

mikuontop: girl… y’know what, it doesn’t matter, i respect the dedication

georgerussell ✔️: VERY cool lovie… quite possibly the coolest thing to happen in the history of f1 ❤️ you look gorgeous as always

❤️ liked by mikumanagement and hatsunemiku

> mikumanagement : my face is blurred ^_^

❤️ liked by georgerussell

> georgerussell ✔️: even blurred, you’re still gorgeous ❤️

mikumylove: how she’s managed to stay anonymous while dating a f1 driver is beyond me…

> mymiku: how she’s managed to stay anonymous while miku is a huge as she is you mean? sorry but george is nothing compared to how huge miku is 🫣

oldf1lvr: how the fuck could she afford this?

> mikuworldomintation: girl do you know how huge miku is? this is more beneficial for mercedes than her 😭

georgerussells: new pictures of george and his… girlfriend? posted today by mikumanagement… i don’t even know anymore…

f1forlife: george, m and miku have baffled the fan page 😭

> georgerussells: m?

> f1forlife: it’s what miku’s manger ( creator ) goes by due to the whole anonymous thing <3

mikuworldomination: no, foolish f1 fan, miku isn’t his girlfriend, his girlfriend is miku’s manager ( creator )

> georgerussells: man i don’t know, i don’t understand any of this 😭

> mikuworldomination: miku is more like their child and it seems george supports this because he called her “my miku” in the first ever miku x mercedes announcement post 🥹

❤️ liked by mikumanagement

oldf1lvr: the last one is killing me, they’re on some romantic dinner date and miku is just there too

> iluvf1: wherever they go, miku comes too 😭

> oldf1lvr: #getmikuaboyfriendorgirlfriend

> georgerussell ✔️: absolutely not

> mikumanagement ✔️: no, too young >:(

> iluvf1: oh my god, she literally is their child

streamiku: the way m treats miku like she’s a real person will always be so fucking funny to me… she edits a png of her into practically EVERY photo she takes

> hatonhatsune: i think it’s cute 😭

mikumanagement and hatsunemiku: congratulations on the p1 win in austria georgie! maybe miku luck is real… hm… wishing lewis lots of luck in siverstone 💖

iluvf1: do you ever plan to go to a race? wigh miku, of course

> mikumanagement: i have been and i was there in austria :D

❤️ liked by georgerussell

> iluvf1: sorry WHAT?

> mikumylove: pleaseee, imagine speaking to some random girl in the paddock and turns out it’s the woman behind hatsune miku and not knowing…

imthinkingmiku: so there’s a chance a camera has captured her before and we just don’t know… that’s so… IRRITATING 😭

georgerussell ✔️: thank you lovie and miku ❤️ couldn’t have done it without you

❤️ liked by mikumanagement and hatsunemiku

> mikuworldomination: obsessed with how we all know it’s yn who runs both accounts and she likes comments on both to keep up the impression that miku is her own person

> oldf1lvr: she loves those pixels so much 💔

lewishamilton ✔️: thanks for the good luck wishes m and m! i’m sure with you two cheering me on, i’ll do decent

❤️ liked by mikumanagement, georgerussell and hatsunemiku

> lewishammy: m and m… he’s given them a nickname 😭

> mikuworldomintation: he’s a miku luck believer, let’s go lewis

⋆ ˚｡⋆ ୨୧ ˚ NEW ADDED BONUS ˚ ୨୧ ⋆｡˚ ⋆

is miku luck real? toto sure thinks so! guess we’ll see on the 7th lol

[kiyo-cant-write]

Heyya saw you're open, so I would like to request my favorite character. Seeing how I saw you write the guy.

I've been seeing a lot of RSA!Silver. So it's about Silver and MC/Yuu still not in relationships. Then some shenanigans happen. Where there's RSA version Silver shows up(temporary). I'm sure he's still the same. But, RSA!Silver is more up front showing affection to Yuu but Silver is not. It ends up confusing Yuu's feelings and makes Silver try his best to show his affection too. It's making RSA!Silver and Silver fighting over Yuu. Hopefully no problem.

RSA!Silver (Magic) VS NRC!Silver (Canon) ✧･ﾟ

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Thank you for requesting! You're actually my first request on this blog! Congrats on that, anon! I love Silver so I hope I did this prompt justice! Enjoy! I tried my best for this ^^ !!

This is headcanons and a mini scenario. I don't take fic requests at the moment, and this is the length they max out at. Sorry if it's considered short!

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TW/CW: None

Notes: established crushes, Silver/Reader not yet together, gender neutral reader, they/them pronouns for the reader, there are two Silvers lmao, reader is Yuu/Ramshackle Prefect

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✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:

Silver

Silver doesn't realize what is happening at first, to be honest.

He barely realizes he has feelings for [Name] yet and it's so off his radar that there could be another him.

He never could have imagined this.

He doesn't notice RSA!Silver until his [Name], who is already down bad for Silver, points out the situation, making it so obvious he can't ignore it.

It's almost sad that Silver doesn't realize [Name] likes him.

Though, [Name] doesn't point out Silver #2 so much as spend time with him only for Silver Prime to find them together.

Now he's confused. Why does that guy look like him?

Who the heck is this guy?

Is there magic at work here? (Yes, probably).

Silver is quick to jump into action, thinking he is "protecting" his crush from dangerous magic, he doesn't intend to make them mad. He doesn't understand why he jumps into action so quickly. [Name] is not his master, Malleus-sama is!

[Name] doesn't like that two Silvers are fighting, however. (Keep in mind that they are sword fighting, it's not exactly SAFE)

RSA!Silver is soft and sweet, always smiling and wanting to talk to [Name] or spend time with them. He's done nothing wrong!

[Name] finds it a bit jarring that RSA!Silver is so... radiant.

He is many words that [Name] thought only applied to Pomefiore.

Silver, after being told not to fight, sits down at the table with them.

He is trying his very best not to nod off.

He doesn't realize why this makes him annoyed.

[Name] is living both a fantasy and a nightmare, terrified about what might have caused this but enjoying two Silvers.

The peace doesn't last, however, because now there's tension.

Ultimately the radiant Silver disappears without a trace and [Name] opts to not tell a teacher if only to avoid more work for themselves since they already handle most school issues.

Silver uses the aftermath to make the most boyish confession.

"[Name], I don't think I liked you spending time with... shiny me..."

Also, yes, that is what Silver 2: The Silvering gets called, any assortment of weird nicknames.

Silver was not bothered by it, initially. He was calmed down after he was assured the other Silver was not dangerous (and after being told that sword fighting on campus was against the rules)...

But now? Now it was beginning to annoy him. A sharper feeling than when he wanted to scold Sebek for some kind of misbehavior toward the NRC student body, he felt a slight urge to throttle this man who looked like himself.

It was startling, actually, Silver never expected to see such a radiant version of himself, a young man with his same silver hair and unique eye color who was smiling brightly and happily chatting with [Name].

He wasn't sure how to feel about it. How does one respond?

"[Name].." he said, calling out to them.

There was no response.

He knew it was from the distance but something about it felt personal to him and it made his skin crawl. Why was [Name] paying so much attention to this other person? This person looked like him. He heard them comment about that very thing. So why did they choose this over the real thing? It was.... confusing.

He wanted to ask his father about it but the older fae was in a meeting in Malleus' place, likely off somewhere with Headmaster Crowley and the other housewardens.

"[Name]," Silver said again, a bit more volume added to his statement as he walked closer to the table where they sat, "I was looking for you."

"Silver!" [Name] said as they whipped around to look at him.

He didn't know who the professors had told about the incident where this other Silver showed up, but he was certain that [Name] knew it was not him... while it was still technically him, he supposed.

"Hello."

He greeted them in a deadpan tone as he sat down at the table with them, a serious expression gracing his features. The expression was opposite the glittering one the other Silver wore.

"It's so funny to see you two next to each other," [Name] laughed.

"Is it?" Silver questioned, raising a brow.

"I think it's funny too," the other Silver said, "But I am glad I got to meet you, [Name]. You're as lovely as any princess."

"Oh?" [Name] responded, face flushing at the compliment, "Thank you..."

Silver felt annoyance bubble in him, a vein about to pop on his forehead as he thought about it longer. Why was this version of him acting this way? He wanted to be the one to speak to [Name] during this free period. He did not need this.... this imposter here.

"!!!!"

His own thoughts startled him. Was he really so angry?

"Silver, what's wrong?" [Name] asked him.

"Nothing to worry about," he assured them.

"Are you certain you're alright? Do you need help?" the other Silver asked, a worried expression showing he was genuinely concerned.

"I am... fine," Silver told his other self.

[Name] returned to their conversation with the other Silver who was returning their comments with flowery words and compliments, the kind of language that Silver himself was often incapable of. It made something inside of him twist.

"You're the most beautiful person I have ever met, [Name]," the other Silver told them, "If you would let me, I would ask you to—"

A hand covered the other Silver's mouth. It was the true Silver.

"That is enough out of you," Silver said through slightly gritted teeth.

"Mnnfgph?" the other Silver managed.

"[Name], if you would excuse us, I think I am going to see if Professor Crewel has any updates about this situation."

It was said formally as if he was speaking to Master Malleus.

"Silver—" [Name] began, but Silver was already dragging the other Silver away, "I guess he has things to do..."

Silver and [Name] need to talk but that will happen later, we suppose.

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✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:

Thank you for reading! Likes and reblogs are appreciated! Do NOT repost my writing/headcanons as your own >:c Check the top of my blog for the inbox status and read the rules before requesting. This is not a twst-only blog! ^^

[bbagelbitch]

Assorted Nekoma headcanons: (just for funzies)

(they've been sitting in my archives for YEARS)

First years:

Lev actually managed to get a girlfriend at one point about halfway through first year, she asked him out because she thought he was cute, broke up with him a week and a half later after realizing he’s a dumbass and a bit of a weirdo

Shibuyama is one of those people who you’d think he’s just listening to Taylor swift or something but he unplugs his earbuds and its like- little darkie or some screamo heavy metal LMAO

Shibuyama has a helicopter mom which feeds his anxiety to the point that he carries pepper spray with him sometimes

Tamahiko has a pet tarantula

Inuoka is the kind of person who’d wear shorts when its snowing out

Inuoka and lev will both unironically do Fortnite dances during practice

Shibayama totally has a bunch of allergies and is a picky eater

Inuoka and lev are basically just human garbage disposals (will eat ANYTHING)

Lev can’t swim

Biblically accurate lev Haiba (gets the worlds WORST sunburns every time he goes outside)

Lev has low blood pressure and will randomly faint when standing up too fast (Kenma has the same problem but refuses to admit it)

Inuoka is one of those people who types in all caps the majority of the time. Every literature and language teacher he’s ever had has told him off for using way too many exclamation points. (He can’t help it he’s just a happy little dude)

Lev texts constant updates about what he’s doing t the team group chat to the point where he’s been kicked off of it more times than he can count. (Usually for talking about taking a shit) (see Charles Boyle from B-99 for reference)

Second years:

Fukunaga and Kenma rarely have actual text conversations but they’re constantly sending memes back and forth to each other

Tora actually has fairly curly hair and it was a borderline afro when he was in elementary school (he’s part latino in my mind argue with the wall)

Kenma listens to almost exclusively video game soundtracks (skyward sword is his favourite)

Tora totally listens to girypop rap (he is 100% a Flo milli Stan sorry)

Tora has asked kai for advice on how to talk to girls SEVERAL times and the information that you should just talk to them like they’re normal people blows his mind every time (how does kai do it? Is he a witch? A demon?

Fukunaga owns at least 3 cats and they all have weird names (inspired by my friend who’s cat’s name is Fax Machine)

Kenma is the world’s driest texter (canon actually)

Also fukunaga uses :3 constantly

Fukunaga and kenma constantly bully Tora about his obsession with looksmaxing and say shit like “he can’t talk he’s too busy mewing” LMFAO (you either drip or you drown taketora)

Tora knows how to braid hair cause he’d help akane with her hair when they were younger

All of the second years used to bite people when they were kids

Third years:

The third years have done group costumes for halloween since their first year

Kai is basically the team’s dedicated tutor (Kuroo is too snarky and yaku is too impatient)

Kuroo listens to western (English) music cause he thinks it makes him seem cool and he developed a superiority complex about it. “Oh you haven’t heard of Radiohead?”

Also kuroo and yaks have pretty similar music taste (a lot of modern rock) but the key difference is Kuroo likes arctic monkeys and yaku likes the strokes (they argue about which band is better constantly (yaku is right, its the strokes))(cause they always have to be arguing about something smh)

Kai also totally has a longtime girlfriend in high school bro is possibly the only person on the team who’s done ANYTHING with a girl (probably one of the only people on the whole damn SHOW)

Kai defo knows martial arts I would not want to face him in a fight

Kuroo still uses emoticons instead of emojis :3 ;D and whenever he does, yaku makes fun of him and tells him to “get with the times”

Yaku 100% repeats what Kuroo says in a mocking tone whenever the opportunity arises

Kai is the type of person to say “personality” when asked if he prefers tits or ass

Miscellaneous:

Nekoma is the most neurodivergent team in the whole show bruh like come on 

(autistic: Lev, Kenma, fukunaga.)(kenma totally also has ARFID)

(ADHD: Inuoka, Yamamoto, (both textbook cases of ADHD in guys) Kuroo, fukunaga) (Fukunaga my AuDHD king)

(OCD: Tamahiko, shibuyama (I just get vibes ok leave me alone) 

(Yaku isn’t neurodivergent he just has anger issues lmao) 

Kai is the only sane one on the entire team

Kuroo is also 100% one of those kids who got diagnosed with adhd really young so he appears mostly normal thanks to being medicated from the age of like- 6

Every single person on the team is oblivious as to when someone is flirting with them (kai is the exception)(girls pull out the wow your hands are so big and you’re so tall all the time and NOBODY reads into it)

Kai exclusively smells like a mix of vanilla and sandalwood and on the other side of that spectrum, Yamamoto reeks of axe body spray and b.o. No matter how many times Kenma tells him that axe actually drives girls away, Tora never listens.

Akane becomes manager of the boys volleyball team once she reaches high school (the first years will be third years by then)

The team all protective as HELL over akane (canon tbh)

[majimasleftasscheek]

Hihi! Do you have any minedai headcanons? (Idk how to write aAAAAA)

hmmm I had to give this a good think cuz I normally don't obsess about them too much (compared to a certain other pair lmao) but here's what I got 👀

*note! gonna be a mix of silly and more realistic ideas. my interpretation of minedai is pretty unserious

Daigo

genuinely enjoys mine's company, as uptight and neurotic it may be. because daigo was given the chairman position, a lot of people don't respect him other than mine so it's nice to hang out with someone who, despite being overly respectful, is kind to him. he feels a lot at ease with mine, able to be more himself n all that. it's not much but it means a lot to daigo

that said, he totally goes out in his casual clothes when able and is still very goth coded. Mine makes intense but silent notes about every little thing in those outfits and thinks it's very cute when there's little details like tiny skulls n things

likes to do go out spontaneously when he can and takes mine along. mine thinks something like that is way too dangerous for a chairman to be doing but daigo confides that he's not worried if mine is with him (with an ulterior motive to loosen the giant stick up mine's ass to get him to live a little). cue mine choking on his heart

I like the idea of daigo being oblivious to mine's obsessive behavior to an extent. he becomes so used to mine's quirks that he writes it off as oh he's just like that lol. but he's not wholly dumb to it. he'll be lowkey flirty and that's when mine's questions daigo's actions like "why is daigo smiling at me? is he sick? I should call an ambulance..."

genuinely has zero idea what type of things mine likes. tho daigo grew up in a bougie type of life and mine currently lives it, he can assume things like fine arts and fancy shit tho personally he removed himself from that sort of thing as he got older (to avoid being anything even close to his dad lol). comparatively, daigo lives more modestly so gift giving is up to guessing but mine accepts literally anything from him and frankly refuses to give him hints as not to place expectations accidentally

likes to spar with mine and was surprised to see that daigo was decently capable of protecting himself and finds his informal style of fighting very charming. he's seen daigo fight before, but it's a bit of a different intensity when it's just to two of them trying their hardest to impress

has a network of friends/allies like kiryu, kashiwagi, etc that mine keeps a closer than needed eye on. daigo does get frustrated that he has to explain he trusts these people wholly and it's often a point of contention between them

very much likes slow days when they can just chill with each other, however that may be. cuddling is prime even if mine gets mad hot and sweaty so daigo keeps a full body towel handy. it's not unusual for daigo to go out of his way to prod mine for reactions as it's the highlight of his day

Mine

definitely has a shrine dedicated to daigo. for funnies: has weird shit like used napkins, articles of hair, etc just funky stuff someone wildin' would keep. realistically I think he'd be a lil more modest - having photos and baubles, typical normie shrine shit

absolutely has a folder on his phone/computer of "selfies" with him and daigo. most of them are just regular photos you'd find in like newspapers, half of them are blurry as hell, and there's a few he's taken himself but poorly done because he did it under a table or something. and of course there's many photos of just daigo, doing all assortment of things from working hard to hardly working

he's caught by daigo occasionally but mine attributes his behavior to "trying to find better phone signal" as he aims it coincidentally at daigo's spikey heeled boots. even when they're together together, he still does this on the sly

insists on paying for everything whenever they're out but with enough convincing, he'll back down and internally melts when daigo tells him he's just happy to have his company. has a habit tho of "making up" for what he didn't pay for such as ordering lunches n things before daigo can refuse

obvs very violently protective of daigo tho avoids being so in front of him as much as possible. it's very common for someone who's spoken ill of daigo to get their ass beat or thrown into the Tokyo Bay some days later. has a network of people dedicated solely to routing out daigo haters

is often confided to by daigo about the stresses of running the clan and it takes a lot out of mine for him to not be cold and calculating with an answer. has had to learn sometimes people just want someone to listen

at first, mine thought such confiding was some limp dick shit but over time realized that daigo never wanted anything out of such confessions which is unexpected. to have someone be so trusting and vulnerable with him is incredibly valuable

would have "sounds of daigo talking about stuff" recorded and sleeps to it every night. be assured clips of daigo sneezing are in there too

if he was in dead souls, he would be going turbo murder throughout the city just to dent the population of zombies that could even potentially get a whiff of daigo's darkness allure™ cologne. if infected, I imagine he'd have the will to remain loyal cuz the power of simp compels him

[hopelesswrites]

Book Club

Part 2 Part 3

Its short, I haven't written in far too long, I'm testing the waters, part 2 if even one person asks lmao

Joseph Quinn x Fem!Reader

-Your book club bestie persistently tries to set you up with her son, but you don't bet on meeting him on a night out.

Before reading: I felt a little weird about including Joes mum, I didn't want to involve her too much and felt id be best just treating her as another made up character, I have no idea what her name is, I think I've read Mary before? I could be wrong I don't care, I don't want to associate this character with the real woman.

-

You swiftly wrapped a pair of custard creams in a napkin and stuffed it in your coat pocket as the rest of the women bid their goodbyes for another four weeks. Linda, the woman that hosted this meeting had an impressive spread of biscuits with your tea today and you thought it courteous enough to take a few leftovers out of her hand. Also, the train home was long, and you knew you’d get hungry.

“Personally, I thought she was stingy with the snacks today” A quiet voice spoke beside you.

You turned to see Mary, your favourite of the group of ladies you had found yourself joining for book club. She had that look on her face you knew too well, that “we are definitely going to talk about this later” look.

Truthfully, you and Mary had formed quite a bond over the past few months, she was like a mother away from home, you gossiped about the other ladies, about the books you were reading, you confided in her when life got a bit tough, and she consistently tried to set you up with her son. You cherished the relationship you had with her and will forever thank this silly book club for introducing the two of you.

“And that book, what a snooze” She nudged you. You will admit, the book Linda picked for this meeting was pretty bad. “I didn’t even finish it” You answered, earning a chuckle from the older woman.

“Dinner tomorrow night? I can give you my copy of the book I picked for the next meeting.” Mary suggested, linking your arms as you both walked out onto the street.

“Oh, I wish I could, I have a coworker’s birthday to go to, how does Sunday work?”

Mary huffed, “Joseph rejected my dinner invitation too, Sunday is perfect though, I’ll do a roast.”

You rolled your eyes at the mention of Marys son, she was always trying to get you both together to meet. Personally, an awkward dinner with Mary and her son sounded like a dreadful way to meet a potential love match, and the idea of dating your best friend/mother figure’s son had you feeling ill.

“I look forward to it then” You replied, bidding Mary a goodbye now at her car and watching as she drove away before making your way towards the station.

When you first moved to London only 6 months ago you realised very quickly, you had no fucking friends. It was so scary being somewhere so big and so unfamiliar that you knew you needed kind safe people to guide you through the city. Stumbling upon a Facebook group had you joining this book club where you easily became the youngest in the group, but the ladies absolutely adored you, Mary in particular. Months later, you are now well established in the city and well read.

-

The pub was crowded, and the smell of too strong cologne had gone straight to your head, creating a dull ache. Still, you kept drinking, hoping the number you make your feet, your head will also calm down. The booth you occupied was crammed with an assortment of too drunk coworkers and too sober coworkers, staying much later than they really needed to be polite.

“Another drink birthday girl?” You yelled over the crowd. Your coworker, Stacy, nodded her head eagerly. Squeezing out of the booth you made your way towards the bar, which was no surprise just as busy. Your head a little fuzzy remained sore and you could only think the antidote would be another glass of wine. Squished up against the bar you ordered and waited patiently for the bartender to pour your two glasses. Suddenly an elbow to the ribs had you groaning in pain, just your luck, you thought.

“I am so sorry, oh my god, are you okay?” A mans voice spoke from behind you, you turned around to see a group of men all staring back at you, the one closest with the biggest most concerned eyes you had ever seen.

“I’m such an asshole I’m so sorry” He repeated his apology.

Your eyes were blurry, but you could still recognise that face, one you had seen on a certain woman’s phone multiple times.

“Joe?”

The man in front of you looked shocked and the men around him chuckled.

“Another fan, mate?” One teased him.

“Sorry, oh wow, that was so creepy” You rushed trying to save yourself. “I know your mum.”

The shock in the room didn’t dissipate.

“Fuck that sounds worse, I’m in her book club, I’m so sorry this is so awkward”.

You felt a heat crawl up to the tips of your ears and your stomach churned. This was worse than sitting with your coworkers, you should have never said anything.

“Oh yes!” Joe suddenly lit up, “Mums told me heaps about you”.

That didn’t make it any better, given the way you know Mary had spoken about you to Joe.

You chuckled, “Yeah you too” Joe laughed back, the tension now so thick you felt like you couldn’t breathe. This seemed more horrible than Mary uncomfortably introducing you both herself.

“You’re coming to dinner tomorrow then?” Joe asked, snapping you back into reality.

“Dinner?” You asked, heart sinking and head racing, screaming out a chorus of ‘no, no, no, no’.

“Yeah, mums roast, she said you’ll be coming, something about the next book”.

You suddenly realised you were still at the bar and quickly snatched your drinks from the counter, smiling back at Joe.

“Of course, wouldn’t miss it.”

[widowswineapologist]

a/n: random assortment of hcs for the primis boys! slightly suggestive at times so proceed with caution. i left it kind of ambiguous as to whether this was canon au or modern au so have fun imagining whatever :33

primis richtofen:

♡ - he's the type to spend hours initially researching a very vague question he has and then it spirals into him researching something completely unrelated to said question. don't ask him how he got from reading about greek mythology to how bed bugs mate, he doesn't know.

♡ - (also don't ask him how bed bugs mate.)

♡ - for some strange reason, for as long as he could remember, he just gets the most random and inconvenient of nosebleeds. it has happened so often that he's grown to just be mildly annoyed by it at best and he usually has tissues on hand just in case. for him, this is entirely normal, but one time he got a nosebleed while he was talking to you and you freaked out and he had to reassure you he wasn't dying.

♡ - richtofen always wants to be the smartest guy in the room, but he kind of goes feral whenever you correct him. intelligence is already an extremely attractive trait to him, and passion compliments it greatly. the slight humiliation he feels for being wrong is quickly forgotten when he sees that fire in your eyes as you lecture him.

♡ - if you're not able to read or speak german, he is... not exactly going to teach you. what he is going to do, however, is randomly hand you a slip of paper with what seems to be utter gibberish scribbled on it, and he'll simply ask you to say the word with a completely serious expression. and then he is going to cackle like a witch when you say it wrong. he enjoys the little things.

primis dempsey:

♡ - he's really bothered by how much he can't remember about himself, so as a substitute, he tries to remember everything he can about you. it's incredibly sweet and thoughtful sometimes, but occasionally it creeps you out that he can recall some extremely niche and easily forgettable detail you revealed about yourself in passing several months ago.

♡ - throughout his life, he's had a habit of just... randomly falling off his bed in the middle of the night. he has no idea why it happens, he's just grown accustomed to waking up on the floor with his blankets trying their best to keep him tethered to the mattress. it truly is a sight to behold.

♡ - what dempsey lacks in book smarts, he makes up for in street smarts. he knows a bunch of strange life hacks, random bits of information about generally niche topics, weird remedies for certain illnesses, the works. (if any of you have seen breaking bad, he's kinda got jesse vibes in that regard LMAO)

♡ - he doesn't do it anymore, but during the earlier stages of your relationship, he really liked pushing your buttons. once, in the midst of an argument, you slapped him, and after the initial shock wore off, you frantically tried to apologize, only to be met with the marine giving you a lazy smirk. he wore the red handprint on his face like a badge of honor.

♡ - (you've asked him multiple times if he's a masochist or something and he never gives you a straight answer.)

primis nikolai:

♡ - that one guy that just always has random resources on him for virtually no discernable reason. you need batteries? he's already reaching into his pockets. you need a toothpick? it's your lucky day, he's got a pack of them right here. hell, you need matches? he's fishing an entire box out of his bag.

♡ - nikolai has a strange habit of taking in stray animals. he literally can't help it, he sees a cute, fuzzy little creature in need and he's dropping everything to assist the little guy. it's a little sweet watching him take care of animals like puppies or kittens, but he brought home a bear cub once and that's when it became a problem. you do kind of miss mishka though.

♡ - his upper body strength is INSANE. it's not news to anyone, not even you, but it was a little shocking when nikolai asked you to sit on his back while he was doing push-ups. and he did a good amount of them!! if he noticed your shocked expression when he was done, he didn't mention it, but he does subtly flex in front of you every once in a while. what? he's just proud of his physique.

♡ - it might just be because of where he grew up, but he's always checking if you're cold or not, especially during the night. the second you say yes, he's dropping everything to find you a better coat, or blanket, or he even gives you his gloves. he doesn't want you to be cold :( you're always welcome to leech off his body heat too.

primis takeo:

♡ - the proud owner of a very impressive and vast collection of bladed weapons. he prefers swords by a long shot, but even he can't turn away from a well-forged knife. it would probably be concerning if it was literally anyone else, but it's takeo so it's cool.

♡ - a relationship with takeo is an extremely slow burn, but once you've finally crossed that threshold, takeo is in it for life. he takes the term "ride or die" very seriously, and he's willing to do nearly anything for you. takeo would even kill for you if asked. anything to make you happy. anything to keep blood off your hands.

♡ - takeo is very graceful and collected in all aspects of life, except for the first few minutes after he wakes up. his brain tends to lag behind during those moments and sleep still has a tight hold on him, so it results in him looking completely and utterly bewildered as he takes in his surroundings. sometimes he mutters incomprehensible things in japanese during this, and it's hard to keep yourself from laughing. he's kind of embarrassed by it once he fully wakes up.

♡ - he will NEVER admit it, but he has entertained the thought of being a house husband before. what he found even more embarrassing, however, was that he realized he would be very good at it. he's a good cook, he's a god at keeping things neat and tidy, and he would enjoy having time to himself for a while. takeo will never bring this up, but if you do, he's down for it.

[lordturkish-robomallcop]

Gimme 11, 7, 26, 27 and 28 (Drawing not required). For Ana and/or Marcel, but also for anyone whom you'd feel have interesting answers for these!

Taking that and and running with it straight under the fold!

11 for Marcel, Anatol and Roman because he's bundled in with the Ana package: Marcel was my first WoD pc, so he's largely a port of my main DnD guy (Dillup the Diviner) who also got blended with Midnight Gospel dissociative ennui and Mackgyver goofiness. Anatol... less fun and goofy, this one. Ana/Roman were originally built to be kinda a parable tackling my thoughts/feelings regarding to "trans widow/er" narratives and spiraled out from there. I haven't posted their full origin story outside of the snippets in Limits, but a lot dwelling in that uncomfortable zone of folks reaching for things they do not have language for, so they reach into the phantoms they construct of loved ones as mooring points and then freaking out when those points prove to be imagined/changed. Also just a general exploration of "toughing through" a relationship that perhaps has reached its sell-by date. Roman is married to an image of Ana that never was/will never be but has convinced himself that is a natural state that must be returned to. Ana is married to an image of Roman (the man who was disowned by his family to be with Ana, who despite being a bit of a patriarchal terror in his own right was one of the few folks who begrudgingly gave him space/grace outside of his own father) that Anatol has convinced himself is someone he needs to rebuild/is the touchstone he needs. This is also mirrored with Mihal/Kliment, except Mihal in a shocking twist is probably the only motherfucker in this generational pain cycle to recognize, in that one moment, that he was chasing a construction and just... letting go, letting that fixation die. Understanding it was making him and the person he claimed to do everything for worse. That he was unconsciously doing what his own sire did to him, and ooooh no if there's anything he hates more than being passe it's being reminded he's very similar to the Old Dragons. Also the fixation was immediately resurrected when Ana entered the picture, because pobody's nerfect but lil ruffly bugboi tried.

Wow I've already done a massive ramble anyhoot there's a healthy dose of Artemy Burrakh from Pathologic 2 in Ana as well bc I had Pathologic brainrot when I was first drafting him, lmao. He also got his last name Stamatin from that game.

7 for All Assortment of Lads: Marcel is a Divination Wizard, as was his Dillup Double! And like Dillup he'd def find a way to become a Hag. Ana would def be a Warlock of some stripe, likely a Great Old One patron. He'd be a human and be grumbly about it. Eliza is pretty straightforwardly a halfling Rogue. Roman starts as the lvl 1 Runescape farmer and ends up as a pretty bomb ass Ranger. Mihal would be the patron Ana's praying to, lol. 26 for All Assortment of Lads: Ana compulsively categorizes people he meets as different types of flora so this is the perfect question!! Ana- Venus fly trap Roman- Strawberry Blossum Mihal- Eidlewiess Kliment- Red Rose Eliza- Blue Hydrangea Marcel- Ivy/Kudzu 27 for Ana and Macel: Marcel is a Cuckoo Shrike bc he barrels in out of nowhere and completely wrecks other people's houses for his own ends. Like, look at this stupid son of a bitch, I hate him:

Ana is def some kind of weird lizard or stickbug. Part of me wants to say "do dragons count bc he's genuinely the type of kid who'd buy one of those Dragonology books growing up and also his grandfather was an Obertus Monk so Big Lizard Stanning is just a family tradition" but also another part of me feels like that's a cop out tzim answer lol.

28- Ana and Marcel: Marcel rolls with the skaters/burnouts smoking by the dumpsters after school before doing some light shoplifting at the Casey's down the street. Ana rolls with the theater kids to Perkins at 1am as the designated Butch Carabiner Haver of the department. Roman is the single jock at the end of the queer theater table struggling as the "Sure I Am An #Ally bc my S/O is queer but don't get it twisted I'm straight ha-ha" boyfriend. Maybe someday I will dig out the wacom tablet that I know to be existing in a desk drawer somewhere to do my own OC doodles but today is not that day lol.

[klm-zoflorr]

WAIIIT oh my gor dude you ship timelias ? Me as well . Please tell me your headcanons for those two .

Well okay i am not OBSESSED with them, but i do think they have their appeal. Hereeeee we go!

-Tim is definitely a very "jokes" kind of flirt. Elias doesn't look like he is. But oh boy can he match that energy. I think he might be able to fluster tim SERIOUSLY if he plays his cards right and doesn't reveal himself too soon

-I don't see them really dating seriously? Or at least they never get married. Yes you can sleep at my house yes I'll defend you with my life don't you dare put yourself as taken on facebook though

-And I think that's more a Tim thing than an Elias thing. I mean, Jonah is from the 19th century, weddings are kind of the epitome of a "relationship" to him. I think he's wanted to marry his past lovers very badly on occasion but never could. Wants to make up for it now.

-Tim definitely has the potential to bring Elias back to the light side of the force (assuming he was even there lmao) or at least make him somewhat more decent, but Elias 100% has the potential to make Tim into a rich kid. He'd take him to fancy restaurants and have a driver drive them around and before he knows it Tim is addicted to it. Same for clothing, Elias' eccentric style tends to stain everyone he touches. Anyways what i'm getting at is I do think Tim grew up rather well off but if he ever spends too much time with Elias I'm afraid he starts to look down on people who don't assort their socks with their outfit

-and don't get me wrong, he still wears patterned shirts and flip flops to work. He just. He accessorizes.

-i need to draw an outfit swap of them

-i do think they're roughly the same size. This leads to very funny shenanigans where Tim steals Elias' beautiful soft night robe and facetimes all of his colleagues with it. Elias tries to marry him so they can dramatically divorce like he's used to. Tim refuses. It starts a fight.

-Oh, the fights. I do think they fight often, over absolutely insignificant things. That's how they show love. By screaming at each other. Elias got Tim into dramatically shattering fine china* and turns out he's rather good at it

-polyam 4 polyam rights. The two of them have like 18 other people in their poly circle

-Tim is definitely weirded out by the idea of dating someone 200 years older than him at first. He does get used to it, but he NEVER stops cracking jokes about it

-Trying to embarrass Elias is kind of his hobby. But Elias has an excellent poker face and is also kind of a shameless whore, so it doesn't work often

-Who kisses the other first? Definitely Tim. I donnt think Elias would be intimidated or oblivious, but I think he's patient in regards to that and it's funnier for him to let his love interest make the first move (assuming they're the kind of person who has the self esteem to do that, and Tim definitely does)

-Simon Fairchild is Peter Lukas' sugar daddy, who's Elias' sugar daddy, who's Tim sugar daddy. Such a big family you have Mr Fairchild you can be proud of yourself

*well, they're cheap plates from ikea but you know, sounds the same when you throw em at the wall

[intertexts]

anyway for my senior design capstone i want to design a small moq small max run merch company that's intended to work w/ independent artists/games/podcasts on both graphic design and production w/ the intent of providing really cool shit for indie shows etc. that otherwise would b relegated to redbubble and teepublic merch stores. like i'm figuring out how to design & manufacture custom knitwear 2 make cool ass sweaters. gonna do a bunch of screenprinting posters + wearables. some tapestry blankets. hopefully a shitload of embroidered work. tons of different kinds of stickers and maybe machine embroidered patch sets & maybe even like... custom bags & water bottles & weird assorted objects if i can swing that. i think it'll be fun. saying this out loud also so i can start work on it about a year in advance of when that show's gonna be LMAO

[crookedlyinnernightmare]

assorted thoughts on ghosts in saiki k:

It’s a little weird that they retain their skills from when they were alive.

Particularly ghosts whose skills are built with muscle memory (eg. sports players, artists). How do you have muscle memory with no muscles?? Also, because ghosts don’t remember anything from their past life, they’re basically acting out of instinct or habit. If you asked a ghost to explain why they do something the way they do, they wouldn’t be able to tell you. that information is gone.

Truly evil spirits could maybe exist?

I mean, in the first place not all spirits are ~paragons of virtue~. there are some worse ones. like this:

ghosts act the same way in death as they did in life, but with all their regrets and desires scrubbed away due to the amnesia. so if most ghosts are nice, we have to assume they knew basic morals, etiquette, and respect for others as a living person. However, if a person who doesn’t understand basic respect produces a ghost, wouldn’t that ghost would continue to be morally unsound? it’s not like god gives everyone a crash-course in ethics when they die, (unless...? lmao jk) so even after scrubbing away their memories they probably wouldn’t act well.

it might be possible to pass-off a ghost as a living person?

...Not saying it’s possible for every ghost, or that it would be easy, but it could happen! Because ghosts are able to touch objects they used a lot in life or have a strong attachment to, a ghost could, presumably, wear their old clothes if they have access to them (hope your loved ones don’t donate them or throw them away ig...). Possibly, they could also use makeup. Gloves over the hands, a hat to hide the invisible hair and scalp, sunglasses to hide supposedly empty eyesockets, a mask to cover their mouth, etc. and you’ve got what looks like an actual living person. a weird person perhaps, but still.

(...huh that actually sounds kind of like makoto’s disguise...) 

also, living people can’t hear ghosts speak but if you can hunt down an old pencil (like Nendo Sr.’s) then they could write. Or maybe they could rely on their phone and text? idk, idk. i just think it’d be fun!

[user-needs-new-hyperfixation]

NSFW headcanons for sherliam?

Some of these show up repeatedly in my fics, but I'll try to think of a couple new ones off the cuff to keep it interesting lol.

Sherlock is just a teensy bit masochistic. Like very mildly, bordering on vanilla. He likes having his hair pulled or being bitten.

Which is convenient, because William is a habitual biter and hair-puller

Sherlock really loves giving blowjobs. I think this headcanon probably came from the old stereotype (?) about smokers and oral fixations, and now I have to fight with him every time I want him to do literally anything else in my spicier fics.

My headcanons for their levels of previous experience vary day to day, but at the moment I think neither had partnered sex before each other, but Sherlock has always been a "jerk off once a day" kinda guy (the endorphins are just another kind of high) and William was some kinda Xie-Lian-esque monk who just recited his own weird little theatre kid mantras to himself whenever he got hard and practically willed himself into semi-impotence because damn it, he had important things to do and boners were a waste of time. (Then Sherlock came along and absolutely destroyed this carefully developed system.)

They definitely do endearingly cringe little power play games, all "Mwahaha! I've captured you now, Sherlock Holmes. How will you convince the Lord of Crime to let you go?" and so forth. Liam has to let the theatre kid out somewhere. They're both very horny about it.

Liam likes delayed gratification. Likes to spend days building up the tension, teasing with little kisses and looks and brushing touches. Letting the want build. Sherlock "hates" this right up until he gets to enjoy the explosive results, at which point he's determined never to complain about the process again (right up until the next time, when he immediately starts complaining about the process again.)

The first time Sherlock saw Liam dressed down for a case -- open collar, sleeves rolled up, etc etc -- he popped a boner.

The same thing happened to Liam the first time he saw Sherlock dressed up.

Not really NSFW, but they really really like kissing. Like so much so that they sometimes get distracted halfway through the build-up to sex and just keep kissing instead.

Though their romance is blindingly obvious to everyone around them, they're actually quite private about their sex life. They'll smile indulgently through a bit of good-natured teasing, but neither of them are inclined to share any details even with their closest friends.

Neither of them are very loud during sex. They're talkers, but not much for making noise. William does swear in bed, which Sherlock is delighted by.

They discover in conversation much much later that the first time they each gave in to fantasy and got off thinking about each other was the same night (it was definitely the night after The Two Detectives lmao)

Billy is to some degree the exception to them not talking much about their sex life, if only because they spent too much of their honeymoon phase sharing tents and train compartments and inn rooms with him because the bosses had no reason to write off extra space. They got used to telling him pretty bluntly to scram for an hour or two (and compensated him with fruit baskets and having his pick of which tasks he wanted on assorted missions).

[vonlipvig]

assorted suzerain IRL casting picks because why not, really.

this one's honestly pretty good and it literally came to me randomly yesterday while i was rewatching rope, but james stewart as romus would be a pretty good match!

pabel as matthew macfadyen makes me go a little insane because every since i was drawing pabel once and i look at it and go 'holy shit i drew matthew macfadyen' i can't unsee it. WHICH IS WEIRD because matthew is so Tom-coded to me now that it's slightly repelling lmao. but yeah, gay butler matthew macfadyen is kind of a need now.

ok we're in 'trust the process' territory now, but how can you NOT trust the process? i know florence pugh is too young rn to play lucita, but come back in 10 years and tell me i'm wrong. that's literally her and i can't be convinced otherwise.

i'm not gonna pretend i knew much of cailee spaeny but i watched civil war the other day and long story short i didn't like it (alex garland i'm in your walls), but i did spend most of the movie's runtime going 'oh this girl would make such a good vina!', and honestly i'm right! give homegirl some contacts and she's good to go (and she's the right age this time, yay!)

january jones, c'mon! imagine her with contacts and reddish hair, she'd be so good! OKAY OKAY yeah MAYBE i watched a lot of mad men but she would be such a good monica. in my head it makes sense, ok?

i don't actually think this is a perfect fit, but i'm gonna mention it anyway cause i'll be honest, the moment i saw brie larson in that costume i was like OH MY BEST FRIEND NIA. so that's fun.

[statiicstag]

assorted headcanons no one asked for !

alastor was born june 6, 1906 & died jan 6, 1938

(tw—abuse) he had a loving mother but an awful father who resorted to physical and verbal violence when angry which was most of the time. his father was his first kill once he became an adult & inspired the rest of his murders (i subscribe to the idea he has a very dexter-esque moral code, so he'll only kill those he thinks "deserves" it. abusers, rapists, etc.) revenge is a BIG thing for him

he carries that strange moral code into hell. most overlords are bad people, according to him. he doesn't think this makes him a hero tho nor does he want anyone to think of him that way

his hair had soft curls when alive, he still has them in Hell & keeps his hair straight with magic. if his hair gets wet or damp they'll be visible

i do not subscribe to the idea that a man this vain would have hygiene issues LMAO? he smells surprisingly really nice if you're (un)lucky enough to come close ✨️ like cedar kind of

he's nice to children. does NOT want to be a father and wouldn't be a good one (this can change verse depending) but he is a surprisingly good caretaker. i also don't really agree that he'd hit one due to his own abusive past

he's 7'1". a good foot taller than he was when he was living

he does have a tail, he just keeps it hidden. it wags when he's content/happy

(nsfw) the tail is an erogenous zone

(nsfw) while we're here, alastor is a switch. he thinks seduction is a lazy way of manipulation so he doesn't partake—the only way you're bedding alastor is if he has deep emotional feelings for you. good luck

touch averse, touch starved—he only wants affection if he initiates it (typically)

on the subject of feelings he's a nightmare in a relationship. this is a man who equates love to posession and ownership. he can be very obsessive over his partner, as well as protective—and also fucking weird lmao he'll bring you dead things as an act of affection. he'll headbutt you to mark you w/ his scent. he's a freak but expect no less

he doesn't really want a relationship nor does he feel like he needs one. gotta pique his interest for him to keep you around (and even then. good luck he runs from emotions)

he does like his ears pet but only if you're really close otherwise prepare to be missing a hand

he doesn't need sleep and therefore really doesn't unless otherwise convinced. it doesn't effect him either way

yes he bleats like a deer but only when really happy !

he is kind fuzzy/fluffy all over his body & littered in scars (a good ref for that here!)

his shadow is kind of a different being in itself—it often betrays his true emotions. it can also take on a more corporeal form if it wants

he doesn't strike me as the type to own a bunch of random souls willy nilly—he'll make deals but you have to really prove you can be of use for him to want your soul.

[ckret2]

Ok I know this is all casual but now Im like, half the population be lines? Do lines, that are female in Flatlands logic, have a shape theyre still attached to genderwise? Can flatlanders tell that a line is like triangle- and it not be attached to marriage or class. Is it weird for Bill when Ford is like ‘Hexagon’ bc being a shape is a gender but also historically kind of also your class and social identity. Sorry I do find alien social construction really fun

Line is its own gender. If you're a line with some recessive genetic code for a triangle that you got from your dad, you're not a Triangle Lite, you're a line. If a line identifies with a different shape, they're probably trans.

I feel like the question "do lines (who are female) feel an affinity for any shapes?" comes from a place of "all the other shapes are Fun Alien Genders and I'm disappointed that only males get fun alien genders, I want females to participate in alien genders too"—but like, "line" IS a fun alien gender. When I say "their genders are shapes," I'm including lines. Their species isn't 50% Female/50% Assorted Shapes, it's 100% Assorted Shapes.

Flatland made a male/female dichotomy because Flatland WANTED to make a point about Victorian-era sexism, and I'm sort of stuck with those associations as a legacy of starting with Flatland as the base for worldbuilding—but like, I'm EXTREMELY not interested in a sexual dichotomy lmao. If I were actually writing a fic set in Bill's home dimension, I'd probably go a LOT further to homebrew the genders so that it's harder for people to say "lines, which are exactly the same as females." Make lines the same percentage of the population as other genders, for instance, rather than 50%. Or invent a new method of reproduction.

But since I'm writing fic set on Earth and Bill's dimension is only present in flashbacks, digging too deep into worldbuilding that plays no role in the story would be a superfluous distraction—it'd risk dragging readers' attention away from the details that matter for something that'll have no impact on the story because Bill's species is extinct. 🤷 So as it is I kinda have to go "nobody on his planet was male or female, trust me" and move on.

I don't think I've mentioned this recently, but "your shape is your class" is one of the bits of Flatland I've chucked straight out the window, for the same "Flatland did this as commentary on Victorian society, and I'm not writing about Victorian society" reason I've chucked other things out the window. It is an important facet of identity that can impact nearly every part of a shape's life—because that's what gender roles are like—but there's no rigid hierarchical ladder, no formal list of acceptable trades for each shape, no system of generational social climbing via having children with one more side. There's a possibility that it USED to be like that, over a century before Bill lived, in his world's "Victorian" times; but like, he grew up in "modern" times, he had fresh new social problems to deal with.

(And if "families aspire to produce one more side per generation until they start failing to have kids or getting weird mutations" did go on in his world, it wasn't a natural thing that happened each generation; it was society as a whole getting so good at selectively breeding for increased sides that they probably got, like, hella inbred nobility. Perfect circles woulda been like the Habsburg dynasty for sheer terrifying levels of inbreeding. By Bill's times people would've realized that's genetically ridiculous and any families still trying to arrange marriages for increased sides would be seen as creepy and out-of-touch.)

So being a hexagon is just being a hexagon. It's not assigning yourself a gender of baron.