#kill pixie

[raauw]

Mark Whalen - Kill pixie https://www.escapeintolife.com/painting/mark-whalen-kill-pixie/

[dangeroustaintedflawed]

[spineless-lobster]

Hypnos laughing is responsible for 90% of my serotonin intake btw

[blacktooth444]

[dragonnarrative-writes]

Transferrable Skills Part 4

Transferrable Skills Masterlist

CW: POV depiction of anxiety and dissociation, How It's Made, reader character wearing a wig (positive, protective style), Soap (nosy), mention of sex toys, Simon Riley Is Honesty Just A Big Guy (TM),

Simon and Price are gone for less than a minute before you feel awkward. You’re almost done with the water, so you look around for the TV remote. It’s Gaz, absurdly pretty for some kind of international British SWAT team, who hands it to you with a half smile before wandering off, you assume to the bathroom.

That leaves you clicking through the TV while Soap does something on his phone. All of the local channels are in German, you know, so you look for something to stream. You chance a sidelong glance at Soap, but he’s already looking at you. He grins when you make eye contact.

“So yer LT’s girl, then?”

Fuck, that’s not a question you know how to answer. “Um.”

“Leave it, Soap,” Gaz says, returning from the bathroom. He smiles at you as he pockets his phone. “You don’t have to tell us anything you’re not comfortable with. Lieutenant Riley’s a private person, we understand.”

“That’s… it’s okay.” You tap into the PictureTime channel, since it’s not one you usually have access to. As you browse through the educational options - ooh, How It’s Built! - you say, “I think we’re both… a bit surprised to see each other here.”

“I can’t imagine,” Gaz says, sitting down at the other end of the couch. “Oh, I’ve not seen this one on puzzles and cheesecake.”

You tap into it, because you like puzzles, cheesecake, candles, and paintbrushes. Just in time to finish your water bottle. The armchair is a bit narrow and awkward, so you wiggle the cushion from behind your back so you can plop it, and yourself, onto the ground. You shuffle your legs to start your warm up as the theme song plays.

“How'd'ye come to answerin’ LT like yer military?” Soap asks. “’Acknowledge’, ‘acknowledged’, all o’ that?”

“Oh,” you answer, without thinking about it. “That’s just our protocol, to make sure I understand his directions.”

“’E’s givin’ you enough directions to need protocols?” He gives you a considering once-over. “Interestin’. Impressive that it held up in an emergency. That takes practice.”

Shit. “Yeah, I guess so.”

“’S he your, what’er they called? Dominant partner, then?”

God, Simon, why didn’t you take this one with you? “I’m… not at liberty to say?”

“Leave her alone, Soap,” Gaz says, exasperated. He tosses a throw pillow at Soap’s head. “She’s in shock, Simon’s trying to keep her calm and comfortable.”

“Ghostie adopts a civilian an’ ah’m supposed to have nae questions?” Soap grins at you. “She’s got a signal if she dinnae want to talk. Four fingers, right?”

“Bother Ghost about it, later,” Gaz says. He turns to you. “Do you know what you want to eat? There’s a few places open.”

Soap doesn’t pester you, after that. The three of you settle on Mediterranean food, and then they summarily leave you alone. Gaz seems content to watch the show, though Soap watches you do your floor stretches curiously.

You could probably have moved to another stretch a while ago, but you’re still in your work slacks and blouse. You think longingly of the yoga pants you laid out on your bed before leaving for meetings. And then you cringe to think of Simon coming in to sweep through the room and pack up all of your things. You hadn’t packed a lot, but you’d unpacked into the space to make yourself comfortable.

You realize that your sex toy is charging in the bedside table and cringe. You hope he doesn’t notice it. It’s good quality, but you can always buy another one.

And then you start to worry about your phone. You’d left your personal in the room because of the time zone change slowing down all of your personal messages. You’d lost your work phone and computer today with… everything that happened. Were people trying to get a hold of you? Had news of the incident made it to the US? Would Simon see your embarrassing phone background?

You resist the urge to get up and pace. Instead, you settle into butterflying your legs.

“You need more water?” Gaz’s voice startles you, but you nod and he passes a bottle to you on the floor. “Cap says that they’re done with the official stuff, he’s grabbing food while Ghost grabs your things. Probably less than an hour before they get back.”

Your anxiety shouts that that isn’t enough time. But since you can’t definitively answer the question For what?, you take a breath and let it out slowly. “Okay.”

Maybe it’s because your heart is beating a little faster, muscles a bit warmer, but you have trouble settling Into the show. Your mind races. You have to remind yourself to relax, then have to clamber to your feet and shuffle off to the bathroom because you relaxed your pelvic floor a little too much.

Your eyes in the mirror are a little too wide. The wig - every time you wear a good one, you almost forget you’re wearing it - is holding up admirably, at least. It feathers around your face, a bit squished where you slept on it. But with the smudged eyeliner and mascara you can kind of pretend you’re in an action movie.

Thank goodness agent Ghost rescued me and the other hostages, you think to yourself, pouting your lips dramatically as you wash your hands.

The last time you washed your hands there was a dead body on the floor.

“Nope,” you say aloud, practically flinging yourself into the bedroom. “Nope. Nope.”

You pace in a tight circle, kicking the door closed when you catch Gaz and Soap looking at you with concerned eyes. Two circuits later, the room is too small, so you open the door again and shuffle out to sit in the armchair again, one leg pulled up for you to wrap your arms around.

Throwing your mind into action shots of specialty machinery, you try to force yourself to settle. Your whole body feels like it will shake apart if you pay too much attention to it, so you don’t pay it any attention at all. The episode ends and rolls into the next one, so you learn about bird cages and automated pharmacy drones. You hear Gaz say something soft, and Soap answers, the burr of his voice just as quiet, mixing pleasantly with the murmur of the narrator.

You must lose time, again, because the next thing you know, Simon is crouching in front of you again. Big hands smooth over your arms, and he shushes you as you jump.

“Got y’r stuff,” he says. “Where’s your head at?”

You open your mouth, close it. Hold up four fingers.

“Mm, day’s catchin’ up, again. Go into the bedroom, get changed. No zippers or clasps. Buttons okay. Acknowledge.”

“Bedroom, change clothes,” you confirm, heaving a big sigh. “Comfy. Acknowledged.”

He helps you stand, and you can’t help but tip forward to put your face into his chest. He smells a little. Like stale sweat and gunpowder. His arms stop yours when they come up for an automatic hug.

“Go change,” he whispers into the top of your head, “An’ I’ll get rid of the rest of ‘em, eh?”

The haze around you pops. That’s the only way to describe it. One minute, everything is distantly fuzzy, and the next thing you know you can feel the circulation of the air in the room and his heartbeat against your forehead. The TV is quieter, and you can hear Price and Gaz and Soap talking between themselves.

“Acknowledged,” you say into his sternum. “Gotta go change.”

He has to gently guide you around his bulk. But eventually you shuffle back into the bedroom. Your suitcase is waiting for you in the far corner, and it doesn’t take you long to dig out your lounge wear. Soft, thin pants with cartoon dogs on them and an oversized tee you got from a fundraiser. And then you take both off because that’s not sexy.

Why didn’t I pack nicer stuff? Can I play off these lacy panties as sleep wear? He saw it all and packed it, he probably clocked those as the only sexy thing I have. You shake your head at yourself. He said to wear something comfortable. He knows what you have. This is fine.

Your friend’s son’s basketball mascot grins up at you. You decide to compromise and switch the shirt for a black cami you usually wear under a nice blouse.

When you peek out of the room, Simon’s in the middle of the couch, and he’s blocked one end by dragging the table closer to where he’s sitting. His jeans have been traded for black sweats, but you can’t tell if his black shirt is new or not. Somehow, he looks bigger, but in a nice way. Softer. If a brick shit-house could look soft. A brick book nook.

“’Ey, pretty girl,” he says, leaning enough to put an arm across the back of the couch. “Come sit, we’re gonna eat and then we’re gonna talk.”

When you get close, you realize that there’s not enough room for both of you to sit unless you’re half on top of him.

You want to throw yourself entirely into his lap. But you can smell the food now, and you’re so hungry. So you perch as much of your ass on the couch as you can and swing your legs over one of his. You meet his eyes just as his arm comes down across your thighs. His hand cups the outside of your leg in a way that makes you remember what he said.

He’s not letting you go, now.

[s33th1ngg]

Hello!

(porn blogs get the fuck out)

Movies I like: The Phantom of The Opera, A Clockwork Orange, American Psycho, Fight Club, Psycho, Buffalo 66, Alice in Wonderland, The Babysitter, Ginger Snaps, Jennifer's Body, Coraline, Cabaret, 5 Broken Cameras, Good Will Hunting, Lolita, The Virgin Suicides, X trilogy, Heathers, Priscilla, Promising Young Woman, Last Night in Soho, The Love Witch, The Bikeriders, Ready or Not, IT, Nightcrawler, Les Misérables, Silver Linings Playbook, Gone Girl, My Skinny Sister, Speak, Mysterious Skin, The Perks of Being a Wallflower, Thirteen, Black Swan, 500 Days of Summer, The Substance, Eternal Sunshine of The Spotless Mind, Zero Day, Prozac Nation, Girl Interrupted, Gia, But I'm a Cheerleader, Matilda, Tesis, Addams Family, Possession, Christiane F, The Silence of The Lambs, Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children, Donnie Darko, Wallace and Gromit, Chicago, The Fly, I Tonya, Barbie, Thelma and Louise, Bound, Death Becomes Her, Paris is Burning, Peanuts, Elvira, Les Yeux Sans Visage, The Crow

Shows I like: Killing Eve, The End of The Fucking World, Fleabag, Breaking Bad, Better Call Saul, Skins, Shameless, Family Guy, American Dad, Bojack Horseman, Arcane, Dexter, You, GLOW, Orange Is the New Black, Russian Doll, The Queen's Gambit, American Horror Story, Scream Queens, Baby Reindeer, She-Ra and the Princesses of Power, Ever After High, My Mad Fat Diary

Artists/Bands/Soundtracks I like: Lana Del Rey, Boy Fantasy, Deftones, Slipknot, Picture Me Broken, Flyleaf, Kittie, Lady Gaga, Nirvana, Hole, Melissa Auf der Maur, Dazey and the Scouts, Unloved, Bikini Kill, Christian Death, Oasis, Billy Idol, Guns n Roses, The Phantom Of The Opera, Love Never Dies, Cabaret, Psycho, Lolita, Totono, Saya no Uta, Killing Eve, Heathers

Youtube channels I like: Jordan Theresa, Not Even Emily, Shanspear, Nikki Carreon, Kennie JD, Cinema Therapy, Kat Blaque, Nick Crowley, Eleanor Neale, Lindsay Ellis, Final Girl Digital, ContraPoints, Matt Bernstein

Stuff on my list: Palo Alto, Metropolis, Carrie, I believe in unicorns, White Oleander

You can send me stuff you like + opinions, always happy to see ^_^

I sleep

[the-sweetest-g1rl-in-town]

If no one asks me out for the next valentines again I'll go crazy and consider becoming a nun 😽😽😽KILL ME

[livefastnbebeautiful]

[vanillandcinnamon]

[dimitovva]

Kill Bill (2003)

[regretfulgirls]

how i feel in makeup

[desireavenue]

Life shifts up and down…

[daisydenim1967]

♱ in the land of gods and monsters i was an angel ♱

[rottingrrrl]

(Made by me on shuffles)

[s33th1ngg]

[toalltheangels]

I love like a dog