#kigi ajimi

[8bitcat]

Graduation

@lets-play-pripara i’ve had this brewing in my head since you changed hikari’s hairstyle

---

It was a big change. Of course it would be.

Hikari sat there, staring at herself in the mirror, silver hair flowing down behind her. On her vanity sat all kinds of things. It was rather messy, really. She didn’t have time to clean it up. All kinds of makeup she was promoting, ridiculous gimmicky products, and just assorted trash.

But all the junk on the surface before her formed a sort of clean halo around two tacky-looking ribbons. Covered in polka dots, refusing to go with any outfit. It was just like her, in a way. Bold. Always doing her own thing, and giving 110% with it. 

She’d had these for ages now. Absolutely forever. How old was she when she first got them? Young. Really young. God, those days were hell. But that didn’t matter now. As far as she was concerned, the Hikari of the now was who she was. And that’s who she had always been.

Oh, but if she could convince herself of that.

In a way, the ribbons were something that pulled her through life. A rope she clung to as she was dragged through the muck and the mire, hoping, believing, praying that something would be on the other side. And she didn’t know. That was the scariest part.

But here she was. A Divine Idol. She and NightLight were plastered on magazines, billboard ads, every single day was booked with TV appearances and lives galore. It was like being a real world idol all over again. 

She wondered what defined being a “real world idol”. She didn’t change much upon entering PriPara. Sure, she’d made a few alterations. Tried some things. She was particularly a big fan of the new beauty mark on her cheek. But her ribbons...

That’s right. Her ribbons. The whole reason she was sitting here. The ribbons made her who she was. Tacky as they were, they were hers. They what made her feel like...Hikari. They were always there for her-

Right?

No, not anymore. Well, that wasn’t completely true. She loved the ribbons for all they had given her. And of course, she made them look good. She made everything look good! But...now they only served to remind her of a past. A past of yelling and screaming and hurting and crying and...ugh.

Hikari got up from the vanity. She was spending too much time thinking about this. She had things to do. She spun on her heel back to face the vanity-and twitched at the dotted fabric. Maybe today she’d wear her hair down. Always good to have a change of pace now and then, right?

She stuffed the ribbons into her pocket, and hurried out the door.

---

“You’re just like a pile of sand. Slip through my grasp, I just can’t-”

“My face is burning up, so let’s start turning up-”

“It’s like my body is not in my control.”

Hikari finished the performance with a pose, coord still glowing. She had done a small solo performance to tease NightLight’s new album “Morning/Noon/Night”, and after that would be a short Q&A, and then she could have an hour to herself before the next gig.

Everything went smoothly, as always. She had this type of stuff down to a science at this point. Blah blah blah, I love my fans, blah blah blah, inspired by whosie whatsit, a new kind of blah blah blah feel.

“So, Hikari, would you mind telling us why you wore your hair down today?”

Hikari froze. She wasn’t expecting that. And it was a perfectly innocent question. Her braided pigtails were unique to her. That was her Look. It was reasonable to ask. But it felt so...acidic. She looked at the Meganee before her. Her face was plastered with the same cheerful, warm smile. Why did it look so menacing.

Hikari choked.

“U-Uhm, w-well, y-you, uh, y-you know.” She coughed lightly, already sweating. Was it hot in here? “I-I’m t-trying t-t-t-t-t-to, uhm, f-fi-er...I-I th-thought mayb-be I-I’d try someth-th-thing n-new?” Calm down, Hikari. Don’t freak out. Not yet. Meganee’s face went from her stock “happy” to her stock “mild concern”.

“Hmmm? Are you feeling well, Hikari?” The audience chatter seemed to dissolve into concerned murmurs, which did nothing to serve her nerves. Oh God. Oh God. Keep it cool, Hikari. Just relax. Breathe normally. That’s not normally. THAT’S NOT NORMALLY. 

“U-Uhm, y-yes, I-I’m fine. I-I’m s-sorry, I-I d-didn’t g-get much s-s-s-s-sleep l-last ni-ight.” She continued to stumble, forcing a smile and a small laugh. Well, it wasn’t a COMPLETE lie. But that seemed to throw Meganee off the scent trail. Or at least she made Hikari THINK she’d been thrown off. But her face returned to the calm smile it always was, and that’s all that mattered.

“Oh! I’m sorry to hear that. But you’ll be able to get plenty of sleep after the show, because we are out of time! Join us next week when we have the hottest unit on the block, Wonder Cafe, come in to tell us what the difference between ‘furry’ and ‘kemono’ is!” Hikari sighed with relief as Meganee began the ending spiel. The audience erupted into applause when the ‘applause’ sign appeared, Hikari waved and bowed, and then returned backstage.

She practically collapsed in her chair, as Meganee came around to powder her face. Her Idol Watch buzzed, and she looked down to see what was up. It was the group chat.

midnightluna: hey? are you okay? i just saw you on the show, and you seemed a little off. everything alright?

Hikari smiled, appreciative of her friend. She began to type, when another speech bubble appeared.

superduperfunsunsunshine: yeh yeh, hikari-chwaaaan! :3 :D :O r u okaaaaaay? we wan 2 make sherbert that ur totes fine!!! <3 <3 <3

Hikari raised a silver eyebrow. She never quite got the hang of understanding how Hinode texted. But it was cute.

apollo13: Yeah guys, I’m fine. Thanks. I really appreciate it.

midnightluna: ok, if you say so. just make sure you take it easy if you don’t feel well. remember the time hinode ate an entire wedding cake before joining the pripara triathalon?

apollo13: She threw up on my shoes. My Brilliant Prince Limited Edition 2015 4th Collection PR Boots.

superduperfunsunsunshine: u guis r meen!!!!! >:C

Hikari laughed, closing the watch and putting it back in her pocket. Her fingers brushed something. Oh right. The ribbons. Ugh, they were chasing her. She stared at herself in the vanity mirror that was nothing like the one at home (mostly due to a distinct lack of clutter). Well, if she was going to put them in, now was the time. 

She sighed, figuring “trying a new look” could wait for another day. She raised the ribbon up, taking a strand of her hair and-

Mud.

The flashback bolted through her mind. The day she got the ribbons. They day she got pushed in the mud. Something that clung to her for better and for worse. Was she tearing up. Damn it. Damn it, damn it, damn it. She stuffed the ribbons back in her pocket and wiped her tears before anyone could see.

She had to get out. And that’s exactly what she did, ghosting her way through the crowds of Meganees and other idols and out into PriPara Town prior.

She had to get out.

---

Well, that would never work. Hikari poked her head out from the bushes. A bunch of idols were doing a photoshoot RIGHT in front of the gate. All she wanted was to run home, turn off all the lights, and hide under the blankets and maybe cry for an hour. She stormed off in frustration, still taking the stealthy route. But now she was ANGRY and stealthy.

She found herself in a small garden. Which, in PriPara, was not anything new. PriPara was 90% plant life at this point. It was empty, thank God. At least here, maybe she could get some time alone with her thoughts. Which was actually probably definitely a bad idea but hey everyone has their coping mechanisms shut up.

It was pretty peaceful here, actually. The sound of trickling water from a babbling brook just out of sight. Little flowers blooming here and there. It was nice, serene even. Hikari found herself walking over to a small apple tree in the corner. Her foot gently bumped against the tree, an apple wobbling precariously. And with a gentle ‘snap’, it fell from its branch, right onto the head of the gardener who had been tending to the small area.

“UGYAH!” She shrieked in pain as the apple came down on her head, appearing from seemingly nowhere. Hikari did the rational thing, which was, of course, to scream as well. Which only made the pink-haired gardener shriek even louder. Which in return, scared Hikari even more, and this just devolved into a full minute of exchanging screams.

“Uuuu...uuu...that super duper mega hurt, da vinci...” Fingers reached up, to rub the bump that formed under the pink head of hair. 

“I-I’m so sorry! I-I really didn’t mean to-” Hikari started, leaning down to check if the person was okay. Something felt oddly familiar, but the moment they turned around, Hikari saw it. “UGYO-!?”

“Hmmm?” Ajimi Kigi turned around to face Hikari, and her eyes immediately lit up. “Mama mia, that’s a spicy meatball! Hikarin, Hikarin, the super-duper mega ultra kirakirariiiiin! A modern day Monet, the apple of my eye! It’s been so long, da vinci~!” She immediately leapt into all out yelling mode, bouncing left and right and to and fro around Hikari, who was really not in the mood for any of this.

“K-Kigi-san, hello.” Hikari blushed, a bit overwhelmed by all this. Ajimi got real up close and personal very quickly, and Hikari forced her hands to her sides to keep from pushing her away.

“Hello, da vinci? This is much more than hello! This is hurrah, hail, howdy, and hallelujah! Sweet Andy Warhol, you’re positively Popping with radiance!” Kigi sang. “It seems like just yesterday, you were all muddied up like a broken Baroque!” Hikari flinched.

“Uhm-”

“Hmm, Hikyarin? Why aren’t you wearing your ribbons, da vinci?” Hikari clenched a fist. “Were they not Post-Modernist enough? Did they get all Yves Klein’d? Don’t worry, Kigi always has ribbons galore! I’ve got everything you could ever need from Acrylic to Zoetrope! And of course, how could I forget-”

“Maybe I just didn’t want them, okay!?”

Time seemed to stop for a moment. Then two moments. The air turned icy cold, as Hikari seethed with freezing rage. She reached into her pocket, and raised the ribbons up into the air.

“Maybe I don’t need your dumb ribbons anymore! I don’t! They’re ugly and tacky and they don’t go with anything! They’re such a problem! Nobody likes them!”

Ajimi said nothing, but Hikari had plenty to say. 

“Oh, so what? The helped me through a tough time!? But now I can’t even look at them without thinking back to everything I had to go through with them! I hate those stupid ribbons! They’re nothing but a symbol of everything I don’t want to be! They’re not me anymore! I don’t need them! I don’t want them! I don’t ever want to see those stupid God damn ribbons ever again because I’m Hikari Amanogawa! Not whatever anyone used to think I was, and not whatever I will be! Nothing else matters but the me that is now!”

Hikari took in one big breath, and screamed to the sky, throwing the ribbons to the ground.

“I’M HIKARI AMANOGAWA!!”

And time started to move again. Mostly with the massive amounts of birds Hikari just scared with that scream. Everything was silent for a moment. Even the water seemed to cease it’s trickle. A realization began to wash over her, and she turned around to face Ajimi.

“O-Oh my God, I’m so sorry-”

She started, but Ajimi raised a finger to her lips. She reached out, running her fingers through Hikari’s long, flowing silver hair. And she smiled.

“Hikari Amanogawa, huh? That’s very Hikari, da vinci.” She laughed. Ajimi strolled past her, picking up the ribbons, dusting the mud off of them. She laughed again.

“You know, it’s performance art, da vinci. When I first met you, you were crying in a mud puddle and didn’t know what to do with yourself. You were...Baroque, as it were. Or maybe rather Gutai.” She paused thoughtfully. “I gave you these ribbons because I thought you needed them...and I guess you did.” Ajimi turned to face Hikari.

“But you don’t need them any more, Hikarinrin. You’ve blossomed and matured into the beautiful young woman you were always meant to be.” Ajimi walked up and placed the ribbons back in Hikari’s hands. “You’re not tied up by these ribbons anymore, Hikari.”

“Even after everything that’s happened, is happening, and will happen. You’re still you.”

Ajimi walked past her, heading for the entrance to the garden. Hikari turned around, and opened her mouth to speak. But Ajimi had already bounced off to some other place. She stared down at the ribbons in her hands.

“I’m still me, huh?”

���I’ll always be me.”

“...”

“I’m Hikari Amanogawa.”

---

“Fuwaaaah! Oh man, what a daaaay.” Luna sighed, collapsing onto the couch in her Pripartment. Hinode smiled, seemingly still a bundle of energy.

“Oh, I thought today was fun!” She smiled, sitting down on the nearest chair.

“Fun, sure. Exhausting, also.” Luna flipped open the Idol Watch, staring at it. “Hmmm, Hikari hasn’t responded to any of our shenanigans in the group chat.”

“Hmmm?” Immediately, Hinode grew worried, as she tended to do. “I hope she’s okay...”

“Hikari’s a strong girl. She’ll be fine. Remember when she placed higher than me at the PriPara Song Festival and I pushed her out of a two-story window?”

“But she wasn’t okay. She broke like two ribs.”

“Two ribs she survived breaking.” Luna tried to make it sound like it was less terrible than it was. In reality, Luna had apologized a minimum of 400 times, brought her as many flowers as her allergies would allow, and was at her bedside 24/7. Even though it was just two broken ribs. “...Maybe I should give her a call, though.”

“No need.” A familiar voice came from the doorway. “Did somebody order fried chicken?”

“I didn’t order but I’d like some.” Luna announced, not looking up from the couch.

“...And a completely new hairstyle!” Hikari walked in, doing a dramatic pose. Hinode’s jaw dropped. Luna didn’t move.

“What. What does it look like.” She said flatly, checking for the newest King of DanPri news. Hinode said nothing, letting the teacup she had picked up shatter on the ground.

“...” Hikari walked out of the room, and then walked back in, posing once more. “And a completely new hairstyle!”

Luna finally rolled over, turning to see the new Hikari. And Luna’s jaw dropped as well. 

Hikari’s hair was shorter, but not short. Her characteristic braids were now two small pigtails that sat on her shoulders. It framed her face very nicely, and both made her cuter and gave her a bit more of a mature look. She just looked so much more...like herself.

“Well?” Hikari tapped her foot. She had strolled in here all confident. She did not come here for shocked and baffled gazes. Unless they were baffled in a positive way. Luna sat up a bit, and smiled.

“It’s very...Hikari.”

“Is that a good thing?” Hikari raised an eyebrow. Luna simply laughed.

“Oh, leave her alone.” Hinode scolded Luna, and turned back to Hikari. “But she’s right. It does look very Hikari. It looks like you.”

Hikari stopped for a moment, lowering the bag of fried chicken in her hand. She started tearing up, almost immediately.

“R-really?”

“W-wha-!? Hikari, why are you crying!?” Luna and Hinode immediately rushed to her side, but Hikari couldn’t hide a smile.

“I-I just...” She sniffled. “I-I’m Hikari Amanogawa...”

Neither of them knew what that meant, but they just went in for the hug anyways. Hikari reciprocated, squeezing them tight.

“I love you guys...”

“We love you too, Hikari.”

[xmikan05]

[mirai-e-jump]