#kick big polluters out

[agentfascinateur]

The Summit of Sarcasm...

It is wholly inappropriate for Adnoc staff to be doing PR for Cop28,” said Pascoe Sabido, a researcher from Corporate Observatory Europe who co-coordinates the Kick Big Polluters Out coalition. He says the findings clearly demonstrate the close links between the oil company and the summit team. Earlier this year, CCR and the Guardian revealed that several members of Adnoc staff had taken up important roles at the summit, including as climate negotiators. Some had even been seconded from ongoing roles with the oil company. In June, the Guardian reported that Adnoc and Cop28 shared an IT system and that Adnoc staff were able to read emails sent to and from the Cop28 team.

[sunderwight]

Modern AU where Shen Yuan accidentally sugar-daddies everyone.

So for the purposes of this, Shen Yuan's family is basically $10 Bananas levels of cluelessly rich. Shen Yuan has almost never had to look at the prices of anything he wants. He and his siblings all get an allowance from the family's main account, which increases when they reach adulthood, and in the interest of fairness his parents made it all the same size. So Shen Yuan gets the same amount of money for his daily living expenses as his older brothers with their penthouse apartments and vacation homes and private jets, at least from the family account (since he doesn't work, he doesn't actually make as much as them in total because they earn more on top of their allowances).

And the thing is, Shen Yuan genuinely just lives a lot more humbly. He likes people but what would he do with a vacation house? Anything really nice would probably require him to fly to get out there, and he gets sick as hell on planes. Living in the central city is also not great for him, because the air pollution is so bad. Having a whole house to himself would also be ridiculous. So he has a reasonable apartment, in a reasonable area, and he splurges every so often on purchases that make him happy and take-out food that he likes, and of course he pays a cleaning service to come in twice a week. Most people assume he's comfortably middle class and has some tech job he does from home, but he's been getting a lot more than he's been spending in his monthly allowances for years now, and the figures are big.

Enter into this environment author Airplane and his trash novels. Novels, multiple, because in this AU there's no PIDW, and instead after some alternate PIDW prototype got popular in the harem genre, Airplane decided to churn out a series of copy-paste shorter stories rather than recycling the same subplots in one massively long epic.

Shen Yuan of course discovers Airplane's writing and becomes as obsessed with it as ever, except this time he notices that if there are delays between new stories, they seem to clear up faster whenever he throws some cash at the problem. And also that the drops in Airplane's writing quality coincide with times when Shen Yuan was having health issues and not keeping up with his VIP purchases. So, he works out that Airplane's probably doing the writing for the money, and that when Peerless Cucumber isn't paying the most for it, Airplane starts listening to the other buffoons in the comment section more to try and entice them to pay his bills instead.

Peerless Cucumber leaves a comment on one of Airplane's latest stories that kicks off the two of them actually chatting, and Shen Yuan eventually gets to the point of offering to fund all Airplane's writing, in exchange for Airplane not doing his crap sellout stuff to appeal to other readers anymore. Airplane thinks he's joking or maybe mocking him. Shen Yuan asks how much it would cost. Airplane fires off a ridiculous number. Shen Yuan doesn't even blink and wires him the first payment. Then he gets annoyed because Airplane leaves him on read for a while, but that's because Airplane is staring at his account balance in shock.

Of course, it's Airplane who starts referring to Peerless Cucumber as his sugar daddy. Shen Yuan is just like "based on your sex scenes I don't think anyone would pay you for that" and Airplane's all "but you WOULD pay for my sex scenes ^_~" and Shen Yuan's like "technically I am actually paying you not to write that shit" and so on. Usual banter. The quality of Airplane's writing improves dramatically, a lot of his readership drops off but he does get new readers and gradually builds up an even bigger fanbase than before, and so on, it all goes pretty well. He eventually writes a few things that take off to the point of getting physical publications and international translations. Technically Airplane no longer needs Shen Yuan to pay all of his bills by that point but he's not going to tell Shen Yuan that! The contract's still good as long as he keeps writing!

Then one of Airplane's online acquaintances runs into some financial trouble and asks for help.

Liu Mingyan used to beta read for Airplane back when he wrote fanfiction (she was like thirteen, Airplane was unaware because internet and hey free beta), and it seems her family has hit a rough patch. She wants tips on how to go pro, but Airplane explains that it was extremely difficult and he mostly lucked out by finding a single wealthy backer. Mingyan wonders if the same guy would be interested in her writing, Airplane sadly thinks not because Mingyan exclusively writes kinky danmei erotica and Peerless Cucumber seems pretty firmly in the closet still and also generally prefers plotty and world-building heavy stuff.

But like, Airplane has definitely gotten a vibe off of Cucumber-bro, and Mingyan's gorgeous older brother does video streams of himself doing cool martial arts and swordsmanship stuff. So he asks her permission and when she gives it, he recommends Liu Qingge's videos to Shen Yuan, being sure to mention that the guy in question can't really afford to keep up with his hobbies and oh what a shame it would be if he had to stop making art like that.

Haha, Airplane, you're not subtle.

Even so, Shen Yuan watches the videos and immediately agrees that Liu Qingge is beauty in motion, and that it would be criminal to deprive the world of more videos of his sword. Swordsmanship! That is the, the art of, martial arts! Definitely. He clicks the donate button, reasoning out that he'll just send a donation about the size of his usual monthly payments to Airplane and call it his good deed for the day.

Liu Qingge is very confused by this new follower from nowhere who suddenly dumped a little over a month's rent into his account. One thing leads to another, with Mingyan and Airplane conspiring to try and get Shen Yuan as a permanent patron, and then Liu Qingge being let in on it. Except that Airplane keeps referring to Shen Yuan as his sugar daddy, and well... it's not like Liu Qingge doesn't ever get 'those' kinds of comments on his videos. At first he's embarrassed, then offended, then mortified that his own younger sister is apparently setting him up to make premium private videos for what he assumes is some old pervert who is going to want him to do untoward things.

However, their options are pretty bleak at the moment, and Liu Qingge worries that if he doesn't do this then Mingyan might. She even mentions something to the effect of having planned to offer herself, and only didn't because she wasn't this "sugar daddy" guy's type!

Teeth clenched, Liu Qingge asks Airplane stiltedly for advice on how to... appeal, to this wealthy benefactor.

In the end though it's not nearly as bad as Liu Qingge feared. He winds up doing more videos in costumes and cosplay, which ought to have been an untenable expense, but Peerless Cucumber always ends up covering the cost of whatever he invests in plus extra. Sometimes he sends Liu Qingge stuff with a request to wear it, but so far it's just been like, badass warrior-themed or historical costumes. Nothing overtly pervy. He does some LARPing, he makes enough to start doing horseback archery again, convinces some of his good-looking peers from various clubs to spar with him, and ultimately the most risque videos he ends up doing are the ones where he demonstrates how to put on certain kinds of gear. He still locks those ones behind paid subscribers only, mostly because he feels like he's doing something illicit now, even if he used to show more skin on his older videos any time he took his shirt off.

Peerless Cucumber doesn't leave creepy comments, either. In fact he seems genuinely nice and supportive, it's hard not to like him, and so even once his situation levels out Liu Qingge decides there's not really much need to stop making videos for him. (He maybe even gets a little giddy thrill over... well, sometimes he finds it all a bit... just when he thinks about Peerless Cucumber watching him demonstrate his physical prowess and finding that alone worth... ANYWAY--)

So that goes on for a while, before Yue Qi enters the scene.

Yue Qi is the childhood friend of one of Shen Yuan's older brothers (Shen bros!) and Shen Jiu owes him a big favor for something that he won't talk about. At least he won't talk to Shen Yuan about it. But Yue Qi is also not the type to ask for help, and Shen Jiu is very bad at offering it, so when Shen Jiu gets word that Yue Qi is having some difficulties making ends meet, he tells Shen Yuan to act as the middle man. Go offer Qi-ge money, he knows you're nice he'll just accept it, and then Shen Jiu will pay the actual bill.

Well it turns out that Yue Qi doesn't just accept it, of course he sees right through it, and gently but firmly tells Shen Yuan that he's not interested in burdening Shen Jiu further than he already has. Etc, etc, stoic stiff upper lips and no proper communication all around. Shen Yuan panics because it's not working and he's also genuinely worried about Yue Qi by now, so he tries to figure out how to make it compelling and basically blurts that, well, see, the thing is that sometimes he pays men to entertain him. You know. To like. Do things, for him. So. He could also pay Yue Qi? To do something for him?

Yue Qi gets the wrong idea entirely, and at first is like, oh, no, A'Yuan, you shouldn't be paying people for that! These things should just happen organically! But Shen Yuan is very adamant that he believes in compensating people for what they do for him, it's not like he can't afford to, and it gets awkward but Yue Qi is like well he does have health problems. It's perhaps difficult for him to meet people. So then he starts worrying about Shen Yuan and all these strange men he's apparently paying for "entertainment". Does his brother know about this?

No of course Shen Jiu doesn't know! He'd hate it, and Shen Yuan doesn't want to hear about how he's doing everything wrong with his life again!

Then Shen Yuan mentions that his prior house cleaning service up and quit on him (they didn't), and if Yue Qi would like to earn fair compensation he could just come over sometimes to help instead, and Shen Yuan would pay him just to tidy up and hang out for a few hours! Which Yue Qi thinks is a fantastic idea, actually, even if Shen Yuan is only doing this because of his brother, this will give Yue Qi a chance to keep an eye on him and his so-called entertainers. Even if he sort of... ends up also being one?

Shen Yuan keeps everything above board, though his apartment always seems perfectly clean and he overpays way too much (Shen Jiu is still footing this bill after all), and Yue Qi starts to think maybe he actually is being paid for intimacy. Of a sort that they're maybe still working up to? Shen Yuan usually has a very thin face after all. He's kind of got two minds about this prospect. On the one hand, he's got his situationship with Shen Jiu, so dating his brother would be absurd. But on the other hand, it's not actually dating, and he does like Shen Yuan, and maybe if they can be good company for each other then Yue Qi won't feel so depressed and Shen Yuan won't need to hire strange men so often.

Meanwhile it's come to Shen Yuan's attention, perhaps through an offhand comment he read online somewhere, that people who are struggling financially often also struggle to "treat themselves". Because even when they have enough money to be comfortable there's often the looming specter of deprivation, and etc, so he figures he should start buying some of his dependents more treats and things. Since they might not buy them for themselves? And also he's enjoying doing this but shhh no he isn't, it's a huge hassle, he's only doing it out of basic moral decency, etc.

So like, Airplane starts getting little things that he'd put on some public wish lists, clearly sent by Peerless Cucumber. And he tells Mingyan to make a list for Liu Qingge too, and sure enough, Liu Qingge (bewildered, slightly flustered) tries to figure out what he's supposed to do with an album from a band he likes and some high-end leather polish. Ultimately settles on playing the music and wearing his nicest leather in his next video. Yue Qi starts arriving at Shen Yuan's place to be plied with his favorite coffees and to have scented candles awkwardly foisted onto him (Shen Yuan does not know what Yue Qi likes in gifts) (he buys these presents himself they're not out of Shen Jiu's pocket).

So finally Shen Yuan's parents start to notice that he's been spending a lot more than usual, and start to worry that he's either been taken in by a scam artist or is secretly dating a gold digger or has developed a drug addiction or something. But asking things directly like normal people is basically illegal in the Shen family, so they decide to hire a private investigator.

Enter Luo Binghe, a young man of humble background who is struggling to make ends meet after the untimely death of his adoptive mother, and is using his P.I. job and his online cooking videos to help pay his way through school (scholarship student). Usually his cases are more like, cyberstalking someone to find out if they're cheating on their spouse, or helping someone planning a lawsuit accumulate evidence on their corrupt employer, or other things like that. When he gets the Shen Yuan case, the idea that the Shen family's son is paying for "company" is well within his list of probable answers.

Though this one is a little... peculiar?

Mostly because Binghe can't find evidence of Shen Yuan actually getting what he would, presumably, be paying for. At first Luo Binghe just goes through the online paper trails, using the info that the Shen parents give him to figure out that Shen Yuan is paying Airplane and Swordmaster Liu (*cough*) what seem to be exorbitant prices just for trashy fiction and cosplay videos. He assumes this is a cover, that someone's actually delivering drugs or going over for "private meetings" or at least actually sending dirty videos as well, but even when he pays for Liu Qingge's VIP access it's just tutorials and such. Neither of these guys are even on any of the sites that are more lenient towards hosting explicit content. Luo Binghe's aware that kinks aren't always obviously sexual, but people don't usually pay through the nose for the kind of content they can easily find for free all over the place, either.

He digs a little more but keeps coming up empty on evidence to clarify which of the many vices the Shen family's son is actually indulging in. Which is a problem because that's the information they're paying him to find out. Plus his curiosity kind of piques as he reads Shen Yuan's seemingly quite invested comments on Airplane's writing and Liu Qingge's videos, looking to see if there's any kind of clandestine code or pattern. But near as he can tell, whatever else Shen Yuan might be getting out of these arrangements, he does genuinely like the stories and videos too? Well. Sometimes. Sometimes he's actually scathingly vitriolic towards Airplane's writing.

Luo Binghe decides that surveilling Shen Yuan himself is probably the way to go. That gets more complicated in court cases, but since the Shen parents just wants to know what's going on and aren't planning on prosecuting their son for anything, it doesn't matter as much if Luo Binghe gets information in sneaky or underhanded ways.

So, Binghe uses the account he created to access Liu Qingge's videos to chat with Shen Yuan a few times, and then recommends his own cooking channel. Shen Yuan doesn't seem too interested in cooking, so Luo Binghe makes sure to include a video that has an image of himself in his recommendation, and then films a few new videos of himself cooking with his shirtsleeves rolled up to three quarters and a few more buttons than usual unbuttoned, adopting a more flirty persona than he typically does for his shows. He takes his cues from some of Liu Qingge's more popular videos for how to be enticing bait.

It takes a few videos, but eventually Shen Yuan comments. Luo Binghe latches onto the chance to start talking to him, playing up a persona of a vulnerable young man with little means who is trying hard to make it through school, etc, and sure enough Shen Yuan seems interested. Well, most predatory people like vulnerable targets, don't they?

However... Shen Yuan just sends him a chunk of money.

Luo Binghe is confused.

Isn't he supposed to ask for something or create some kind of expectation of repayment first? But, maybe this is his approach to handling new targets. Maybe he's just trying to lull Binghe into a false sense of complacency, before he starts indicating what he wants from all of this. Luo Binghe makes sure to move the money Shen Yuan sends him into a separate account, so that if the Shen parents get angry about it then he can return it as a gesture of good faith.

But Shen Yuan just keeps sending supportive comments and donations. Eventually he leaves a comment that alludes to how badly he'd like to taste Binghe's cooking, and Binghe is like finally, but when he implies that they could perhaps meet in person and Luo Binghe could thank him for his support by making him something, Shen Yuan backs off.

Things eventually progress to the point where Luo Binghe, who is a totally normal person treating this like a totally normal job still thank you very much, is basically camping out in the bushes in front of Shen Yuan's apartment building. At some point he conscripts the aid of his weird cousin (finding his birth family was how he got into this business initially), and then almost immediately regrets it because Shen Yuan helps get Zhuzhi Lang a job doing landscaping for his building.

Why would he want Zhuzhi Lang close but not Binghe? Binghe is much handsomer! He'd make an excellent target for seduction! >:(

Anyway eventually Yue Qi catches Luo Binghe lurking around like a creeper and is like, finally, I have caught one of these suspicious men, whilst Binghe is like oh so he does have a lover, well this guy sucks and is clearly not good enough for him, and they both try and chase one another off and Shen Yuan comes home to a heated passive-aggressive-politeness war being waged in front of his apartment. Eventually he realizes the misunderstanding and calls everyone together (zoom conference? in-person meet-up?) to clarify that he is not paying any of them for "special favors", that was just Airplane being deranged about his sense of humor, and then he has no idea what to do when the prevailing response seems to be disappointment.

[dandelionsresilience]

Good News - July 22-28

Like these weekly compilations? Tip me at $kaybarr1735 or check out my new(ly repurposed) Patreon!

1. Four new cheetah cubs born in Saudi Arabia after 40 years of extinction

“[T]he discovery of mummified cheetahs in caves […] which ranged in age from 4,000 to as recent as 120 years, proved that the animals […] once called [Saudi Arabia] home. The realisation kick-started the country’s Cheetah Conservation Program to bring back the cats to their historic Arabian range. […] Dr Mohammed Qurban, CEO of the NCW, said: […] “This motivates us to continue our efforts to restore and reintroduce cheetahs, guided by an integrated strategy designed in accordance with best international practices.””

2. In sub-Saharan Africa, ‘forgotten’ foods could boost climate resilience, nutrition

“[A study published in PNAS] examined “forgotten” crops that may help make sub-Saharan food systems more resilient, and more nutritious, as climate change makes it harder to grow [current staple crops.] [… The study identified 138 indigenous] food crops that were “relatively underresearched, underutilized, or underpromoted in an African context,” but which have the nutrient content and growing stability to support healthy diets and local economies in the region. […] In Eswatini, van Zonneveld and the World Vegetable Center are working with schools to introduce hardy, underutilized vegetables to their gardens, which have typically only grown beans and maize.”

3. Here's how $4 billion in government money is being spent to reduce climate pollution

“[New Orleans was awarded] nearly $50 million to help pay for installing solar on low to middle income homes [… and] plans to green up underserved areas with trees and build out its lackluster bike lane system to provide an alternative to cars. […] In Utah, $75 million will fund several measures from expanding electric vehicles to reducing methane emissions from oil and gas production. [… A] coalition of states led by North Carolina will look to store carbon in lands used for agriculture as well as natural places like wetlands, with more than $400 million. [… This funding is] “providing investments in communities, new jobs, cost savings for everyday Americans, improved air quality, … better health outcomes.””

4. From doom scrolling to hope scrolling: this week’s big Democratic vibe shift

“[Democrats] have been on an emotional rollercoaster for the past few weeks: from grim determination as Biden fought to hang on to his push for a second term, to outright exuberance after he stepped aside and Harris launched her campaign. […] In less than a week, the Harris campaign raised record-breaking sums and signed up more than 100,000 new volunteers[….] This honeymoon phase will end, said Democratic strategist Guy Cecil, warning the election will be a close race, despite this newfound exuberance in his party. [… But v]oters are saying they are excited to vote for Harris and not just against Trump. That’s new.”

5. Biodegradable luminescent polymers show promise for reducing electronic waste

“[A team of scientists discovered that a certain] chemical enables the recycling of [luminescent polymers] while maintaining high light-emitting functions. […] At the end of life, this new polymer can be degraded under either mild acidic conditions (near the pH of stomach acid) or relatively low heat treatment (> 410 F). The resulting materials can be isolated and remade into new materials for future applications. […] The researchers predict this new polymer can be applied to existing technologies, such as displays and medical imaging, and enable new applications […] such as cell phones and computer screens with continued testing.”

6. World’s Biggest Dam Removal Project to Open 420 Miles of Salmon Habitat this Fall

“Reconnecting the river will help salmon and steelhead populations survive a warming climate and [natural disasters….] In the long term, dam removal will significantly improve water quality in the Klamath. “Algae problems in the reservoirs behind the dams were so bad that the water was dangerous for contact […] and not drinkable,” says Fluvial Geomorphologist Brian Cluer. [… The project] will begin to reverse decades of habitat degradation, allow threatened salmon species to be resilient in the face of climate change, and restore tribal connections to their traditional food source.”

7. Biden-Harris Administration Awards $45.1 Million to Expand Mental Health and Substance Use Services Across the Lifespan

““Be it fostering wellness in young people, caring for the unhoused, facilitating treatment and more, this funding directly supports the needs of our neighbors,” said HHS Secretary Xavier Becerra. [The funding also supports] recovery and reentry services to adults in the criminal justice system who have a substance use disorder[… and clinics which] serve anyone who asks for help for mental health or substance use, regardless of their ability to pay.”

8. The World’s Rarest Crow Will Soon Fly Free on Maui

“[… In] the latest attempt to establish a wild crow population, biologists will investigate if this species can thrive on Maui, an island where it may have never lived before. Translocations outside of a species’ known historical range are rare in conservation work, but for a bird on the brink of extinction, it’s a necessary experiment: Scientists believe the crows will be safer from predators in a new locale—a main reason that past reintroduction attempts failed. […] As the release date approaches, the crows have already undergone extensive preparation for life in the wild. […] “We try to give them the respect that you would give if you were caring for someone’s elder.””

9. An optimist’s guide to the EV battery mining challenge

““Battery minerals have a tremendous benefit over oil, and that’s that you can reuse them.” [… T]he report’s authors found there’s evidence to suggest that [improvements in technology] and recycling have already helped limit demand for battery minerals in spite of this rapid growth — and that further improvements can reduce it even more. [… They] envision a scenario in which new mining for battery materials can basically stop by 2050, as battery recycling meets demand. In this fully realized circular battery economy, the world must extract a total of 125 million tons of battery minerals — a sum that, while hefty, is actually 17 times smaller than the oil currently harvested every year to fuel road transport.”

10. Peekaboo! A baby tree kangaroo debuts at the Bronx Zoo

“The tiny Matschie’s tree kangaroo […] was the third of its kind born at the Bronx Zoo since 2008. [… A] Bronx Zoo spokesperson said that the kangaroo's birth was significant for the network of zoos that aims to preserve genetic diversity among endangered animals. "It's a small population and because of that births are not very common," said Jessica Moody, curator of primates and small mammals at the Bronx Zoo[, …] adding that baby tree kangaroos are “possibly one of the cutest animals to have ever lived. They look like stuffed animals, it's amazing.””

July 15-21 news here | (all credit for images and written material can be found at the source linked; I don’t claim credit for anything but curating.)

[andypantsx3]

SOMETHING IN THE WATER | 5 | SHOUTO x READER

SUMMARY: As a future marine biologist, you’ve scored big on your final internship: a summer in the tropics, researching the waters off the coast of a lush, sunny island. But what you thought would be all beach days and piña coladas turns out to be the revelation of a lifetime when you haul in a handsome merprince, and discover not everything in these waters is quite as it seems. TAGS/WARNINGS: mermaid au, interspecies relationships, mating rituals/courting behavior, (sort of) case fic, aged up characters, eventual smut, fem pronouns/afab reader LENGTH: 3.5k of est. 21k, 5th of 8 chapters

It was pollution. No doubt about it.

Under the lens of one of Kamui’s microscopes, the evidence was incontrovertible. The piece of white coral Shouto had brought you sported distinct traces of industrial processing chemicals that had almost certainly contributed to its bleaching, the concentration high enough that it had also probably choked the life out of the nearby environment.

It was high enough, in fact, that you were absolutely floored your team hadn’t come across even a hint of anything similar before. Based on the levels, you should have been finding at least smaller traces close to the area it came from, but nothing you’d found so far had even hinted at anything like this.

Which begged the question, just where in the hell had Shouto gotten it from?

When you legged it back down to the beach, however, both the merman and your sandwich were missing. The only evidence of his presence were the slices of mozzarella that had clearly been picked out of the sandwich, laid out cleanly on the wrapper you’d left behind.

You’d sighed and cleaned your trash up, then slogged back to your room for a shower and a few hours of sleep, stowing the coral away safely to show to your team in the morning.

When you awoke, however, you realized you would have no way of explaining to them where you’d obtained it, and no way to point them any closer to the source of the issue. You resolved to find Shouto as soon as possible to figure out what was going on, hopefully before the scheduled tour of Sunfish.

You rocketed through your morning tasks, and hurriedly volunteered to take over trap checking duty, disappearing out the door before Yu could so much as get out a reply.

You boated north to the reef where you’d first met Shouto, and jumped into the water before you’d even gotten your snorkeling gear on properly, certain the merman would somehow find you. You’d nearly finished checking the trap, kicking off the seafloor to rise back to the surface when a hand seized your elbow, guiding you back up.

Shouto’s handsome face was staring back at you when you yanked off your goggles, his distinctive hair slicked back with ocean water, the scar around his eye a deep pink in the sunlight. Sunlight glittered off the droplets on his skin, making him look even more ethereal than he usually did, and your breath momentarily seized in your chest.

“Hi Shouto,” you said, your face going hot when it came out weirdly breathy. Embarrassing.

A tiny little smile pulled at the corner of his mouth, and his fingers flexed on your elbow. “Hello,” he said in his deep, even tone.

Even that simple greeting somehow made you flush. You quickly marshaled yourself, trying to remember you had come here with an agenda, not to float here stupidly in the water, staring at him.

“Shouto—that coral you gave me yesterday? One of them has the signs of the pollution I was looking for!”

Shouto blinked, a droplet of water sliding down the side of his straight, handsome nose. Your eyes seemed weirdly glued to it as it reached the edge of his mouth.

“Then you liked it? It had…microbes?” he asked.

You nodded distractedly. “Sort of. Signs of microbial unhealth and chemically-induced bleaching. And I did like it. I think you might have actually solved the whole case for me!”

Shouto’s mouth pulled into a fuller, happier smile, just enough to bare the tops of those sharp teeth. You blinked, momentarily stunned, looking back up into his eyes to find him watching you intently.

“You liked it. My gift,” he said, something strangely smug in his tone. A little thrill raced through you, a frission of pleasure, at having put that expression on his face, that tone in his voice. Your ears went hot, and you pointedly did not think about why his pleasure made you so pleased as well.

“Yeah, I loved it,” you nodded, startled when Shouto’s fingers slid from your elbow to your wrist, lifting it up to his face.

But then in the next instant his expression shifted, his brows furrowing and the edges of his smile dipping. Instantly, you mourned the loss of it.

“But…you are not wearing it,” he said. “Either of them.”

Your eyelashes fluttered themselves in another disconcerted blink. Had…that been a requirement? Had he said that to you, yesterday?

You didn’t think you’d had much conversation between him handing over the bits of coral and you rushing off to the lab with them, but maybe that had been his expectation of what you would do with them. Maybe that was a common merperson thing, and you were too ignorant to think of it.

In fact, you hadn’t even taken the time to ask him why he’d given the coral bits to you, too focused on getting them under Kamui’s microscope like a huge disrespectful idiot.

You flushed, suddenly feeling incredibly rude. Was this a merperson custom you had just flagrantly ignored?

“Am I—? Is that something your people, um, do?” you asked. “Wear coral?”

Shouto nodded, those mismatched eyes still glued to your bare wrist. His fingers carefully shifted to encircle it, like he was replacing the expected bits of coral with his own hold on you. Your face burned and you paddled a little bit harder in the water, expelling nervous energy.

“I am so sorry, I didn’t know. Of course I will wear them, I just need to find some kind of string—” A sudden thought seized you. “Except—-well, Shouto, I need that white coral to prove pollution. I need to show it to my team, and be able to explain where I got it from. They might need to send it off as evidence.”

Shouto’s fingers tightened on you, though you noted he was still mindful of his claws. A hissing noise exploded out of him, and that scraping feeling burned at the back of your throat again, the bioelectric signal of his distaste clear enough.

“It is yours, not theirs,” he hissed, his handsome face suddenly all twisted up.

You could quite literally feel how distressed he was, and your heart throbbed with the realization that you were the cause.

You immediately backtracked, horrified. You shifted in the merman’s grip, twisting your hand to grab his wrist too, and put your other hand to his shoulder, holding him firmly.

“I’m sorry—Shouto, yes of course it’s mine. Of course I won’t give it to them,” you said, trying to angle your face to look into his eyes. “I didn’t realize—of course I will keep it with me.”

To your surprise, Shouto calmed immediately. The snarl faded from his mouth, his lips resuming their normal soft, sweet shape, and his other hand came to rest at your waist, pulling you a fraction closer to him.

“You promise,” he asked, though it was phrased more like a statement than a question.

You had to fight back a shocked laugh at how easily he’d been rerouted, and how unbelievably fleeting and childish that little tantrum had been. A prince of his people and here he was, getting fussy with you!

There was nothing for your exasperated snort, your helpless smile. “Yes, yes, I promise. But you have to help me collect another piece of white coral from where you got it originally. I promise it’s important.”

Shouto’s hands tightened on you, and you found yourself being dragged closer, so that he was holding you up in the water, only inches from the hard planes of his chest. His tail brushed against the inside of your thigh, the scales rasping lightly over the skin there. You went still, a little thrill racing up your spine at his sudden, more immediate proximity.

“You want me to take you there,” he said, his voice suddenly a little deeper.

You blinked. “I—yes? Is that…okay?”

Shouto’s eyes narrowed in on you, and you shifted nervously in his hold as his pupils went a little more slitted, a little more inhumanly focused. “It is an area of some significance to my people, though it is now difficult to get to. Your kind has begun to touch it.”

Your interest piqued. Humans had begun to touch it, alright. Judging by the chemical processing agents left behind on the piece of coral Shouto had given you, you could guess exactly which humans had touched it, too.

“Is it Sunfish?” you couldn’t help but ask, perking up in his hold.

Shouto inclined his head, a movement that brought his mouth almost dangerously close to yours. Your breath choked off in your lungs.

“Yes,” Shouto replied. “The…microbes you are interested in, then…? They are to do with Sunfish?”

You nodded excitedly, eagerly sucking in another breath. “Yes, yes! God, I’m so stupid, I should have told you earlier—anything to do with where Sunfish is operating is of interest to me. We’ve been testing the—um, the microbes to put it simply—around the area but if Sunfish has somewhere we haven’t been yet, that’s what I’m looking to know.”

Shouto looked thoughtful, and a claw trailed absently down the skin of your arm. You jumped, startled.

“Then I will take you,” he said, eyes cutting back to yours. “On one condition.”

You felt your eyebrows raise. Well that was unexpected of him. Who knew mermen knew how to bargain?

“Name your price,” you told him.

Shouto’s mouth quirked then, a hint of a sharp incisor showing, but the rest of his expression was strangely sincere. “I want dinner and a movie,” he said, a claw trailing sweetly, absently down the skin of your arm again. “Like you said humans do.”

You could feel your eyebrows escaping towards your hairline, your mouth going slack. “You want to watch a movie and have dinner,” you repeated, floored.

Shouto inclined his head, the damp strands of red and white mingling with the movement. “You said I would like a movie.”

Damn. You had said that, hadn’t you? But you couldn’t think how in the hell you were going to get Shouto to a movie. It wasn’t like there was a movie theater on this island, and besides that it wasn’t like you could just piggyback a real life merman into one.

You supposed if pressed, you could preload something on the shitty island wifi and then bring your laptop down to the beach and watch things that way. But what if someone spotted the light and came looking? Shouto could disappear quick enough, you had no doubt, but how to explain the laptop?

And then it occurred to you: the inn had a maintenance shed, just off the main office. A sudden image came to you of wheeling Shouto uphill in a wheelbarrow, getting him into the tub in your room, and setting up a few pillows for yourself, and some kind of dinner spread on the floor.

It was unconventional. But then—so was the idea of dinner and a movie with a merman at all.

You stuck out your hand, making a mental note to swing by the maintenance shed on your way back in tonight. “It’s a deal.”

Shouto stared at your fingers, seeming not to know what to do with the gesture, until you took one of his hands in your own, pumping it up and down. He held on for too long after that, those crimson-tipped fingers closing in over your own, warm and wet and strong.

“Then I will take you now, if you like,” Shouto said. “If you are ready.”

You nodded, paddling your feet a little uselessly in his hold, in eager anticipation. Confirmation of Sunfish’s activity, and the chance to see a place meaningful to Shouto and his people. It was a dream come true for any marine biologist.

Shouto let you go, following you slowly as you paddled back to the boat, swimming leisurely, looping circles around you. He helped boost you back into the boat, and then hauled himself up after you on the strength of his arms alone. The back of your neck went very warm, as you watched his muscle coil and flex as he pulled himself in, then looked at you imploringly.

“I will point the way and you will take us,” he said, slithering across the floor of the boat to slide in next to you behind the wheel. He peered at all the meters and dials interestedly, pressing a crimson claw to one.

You had to laugh at the ridiculousness of a merman sitting behind the wheel of a boat, and another wild idea occurred to you.

“Wanna learn how to drive?” you asked.

Shouto’s eyes slid over to you, turquoise and grey pinning you to your seat. “To operate the boat?”

You nodded. Another hot flush crept across your cheeks as a slow smile spread over Shouto’s mouth, those mismatched eyes glittering.

“Yes,” he said. “I should like that very much.”

You gestured him over to your seat, rising out of it as Shouto slid all that heavy muscle your way, the scales of his tail bright and fiery in the sun. He was warm and smelled like salt up close, and you tried not to take note of the way his bicep flexed as he moved to grip the wheel in taloned fingers.

You gave him a brief run through of all the meters and gauges, the fuel level meter, speedometer, the ammeter and engine hours. He seemed disinterested in all but the speed—a typical man, even if only his upper half looked it.

Then you showed him the throttle and how to turn the key to start and what degrees of movement of the wheel at a higher speed wouldn’t send both of you flying out of the boat. And then you sank down next to him, gripping the seat for safety as he started the boat, looking thrilled.

He guided the boat off the reef more carefully than you would have expected, but he grew bolder as you made it out into deeper waters, applying a ton of throttle instantly and sending you falling backwards in your seat. You zoomed across the gentle waves, horrifyingly fast, but unexpectedly smoothly for someone who had just learned. Shouto seemed intimately familiar with the island’s layout, navigating smoothly through some of the shallow channels that gave you an almost-regular heart attack, gliding easily across the waves and not seeming to catch a single one the wrong way.

A thrilled laugh bit out of you, getting lost in the wind as you sped across the sea. Shouto’s mouth pulled into a wider smile, looking pleased with himself, those sharp teeth white in the sun. You found yourself smiling, at the ludicrousness of being driven around by a merprince, and at how much Shouto looked like he was enjoying himself.

In almost no time Shouto was steering you into a shallow cove on the eastern side of the island a couple hundred meters away from where you’d laid out an observation station. As you slowed to a stop you helped anchor the boat, feeling your brows furrowing back down in confusion, the smile slipping off your face.

If there was any level of pollution in this cove then you would have known about it from the nearby observation station. You weren’t sure if Shouto had the right spot.

But as you turned back to him he pointed a claw towards the jut of the land, aiming with certainty. “There used to be a cave through which we could access the lagoon,” he said. “But it is blocked off to us now.”

You stared at him, befuddled. “Blocked off? By what?”

Shouto’s mouth thinned into an irritated line. “By some human invention—I do not know what it is.”

Your eyebrows raised. “Then—how did you get the coral out of this, uh, lagoon if you can’t access it?”

Shouto’s eyes dipped, following your words as your mouth shaped them, looking strangely intent. Your ears went hot.

“I climbed,” he said simply.

You whipped around to stare back at the strip of land rising into the jungle. You could just make out a clearing in the trees where you thought a lagoon might lay. And it was no small distance. Your jaw dropped, imagining Shouto having to drag himself over meters and meters of land to get there.

Your stomach fluttered, the white coral suddenly taking on a new significance if Shouto had gone to such trouble for it. It had to be more than just an area of interest to his people—-it more likely had to be extremely significant if this was the length merpeople had to go for this coral. No wonder he hadn’t liked the idea of you testing it, of you surrendering it and mailing it out and away, if he’d had to pull himself over land like that to get it.

And with this realization, a new, wildly disconcerting thought crept over you, an insane flight of fancy.

Was it possible that Shouto had given you… not just a friendly gift, but something even more meaningful than you had initially realized? If this was a site of cultural significance, and he’d suffered to get the coral for you—did it mean something a little bit more intimate than an exchange between new friends?

Your gaze darted back over to Shouto, sitting pertly in his seat. He struck such a handsome profile, all sleek muscle and delicately carved features, his face carefully-noted and almost supernaturally angelic. His coloring, too, was magnificent, the rose of his scar, the deep scarlet of his scales and his claws. And he was so sweet, and funny, and so very interesting. He was unlike anything—anyone—you had ever seen, and the thought of him fetching you a gift of special significance made an even more blistering wave of heat flare up in your belly.

You rose from your seat, determined to see this lagoon for yourself.

“Alright, you wait here,” you told Shouto, “I’m going to go check it out.”

He nodded, watching you closely as you went to the bag of supplies, fishing out a camera, the log book, your shoes, and a couple pieces of sampling equipment. You stuffed them all in a dry bag, rolling the top down tight and buckling securely.

“You will be careful,” Shouto intone in his deep voice, more an order than a question.

You smiled up at him, nodding your head. “Yes. I’ll be back in just a couple of minutes.”

He looked satisfied with that, and helped lower you down into the water to swim for land. He slithered off the edge beside you, sinking smoothly into the water like a dropped stone, and swam along underneath you, following you all the way until you clambered onto the sand. You hurriedly dug around in your bag for your shoes, stuffing your feet into them still sandy and damp as Shouto looked on.

Once properly outfitted, you followed the beach as it trailed off into scrub and bushes, and then into towering palms, making your way into the jungle. The sun shone brightly through the leaves, painting everything around you in shades of sunlit green, the air under the canopy thicker than on the beach. Your feet slid over the damp sand in your sneakers, a sensation you did not particularly enjoy, but you walked briskly, your curiosity leading you onwards.

In only a few minutes, the trees once again gave way to a small strip of sand, and you spilled out onto the beach of the lagoon.

It was instantly clear to you exactly what Shouto had meant. A large metallic wall dammed off one side of the lagoon, most probably blocking off the underwater channel Shouto had told you about. It had been bolted into the jutting coral and rock around it, sealing off any water flow. Around it, the ancient coral walls of the lagoon were bone white wherever the water lapped at them, disturbingly bleached of color, and you thought the scrub and the trees that had built up over the surface overtime looked a little bit unhealthy too.

Shouto had most definitely gotten his coral from here.

As you looked around your certainty grew, until you spotted the most damning evidence. Only a scant few meters away from where you had come out of the forest, there was a pipe dug into the earth, sitting about a meter above the water level of the lagoon. It was still shiny, clearly new, and it was also dribbling the occasional bit of liquid into the lagoon, as if someone were piping certain substances out and away from the rest of their facilities.

Your heart rate doubled at the sight, and you knew even as you unloaded your equipment to take samples that you had found exactly what you had been looking for.

There was no doubt in your mind that this pipe led back to Sunfish. And Shouto had indeed just solved this entire case.

[flamingbluepanda]

"Hey."

Ian groaned, eyes closed. He was so, so comfortable. Maybe if he just ignored him...

Why had Ian been so dead set on marrying this bastard again?

"Hey, Ian."

Poke.

Motherfucker.

"Hey. Ian. Red. Firecrotch. Sugartits."

Poke poke poke poke-

"What?" Ian groaned, raising one heavy arm to swat at him. He had been dead asleep when Mickey had shaken him awake.

"C'mon," mickey said, "You have to see this."

Ian sighed, forcing his eyes open. He would've ignored him, really, but Mickey sounded so earnest, and they were three days into their ridiculously long awaited honeymoon to Mexico, so Ian was feeling particularly sappy.

When they'd gotten off parole, finally, three long years after leaving prison, Mickey had been the one to suggest they visit the little village he'd settled in. It was close enough to a big city for mickey to work, back when he lived here, but out of the way enough to hide from the feds and any cartel members that were looking for him. The little old lady who had rented mickey his apartment here was still kicking, by some miracle, and had spent the last three days gleefully whacking Mickey with a shoe every time he was in reach, yelling at him in Spanish.

("She actually really likes him," her son, Luca, who was apparently mickeys singular friend from his time here, had told Ian. "They only ever got along by yelling at eachother, but Mami thinks he's hilarious and was really worried when he disappeared off the face of the earth.")

Still, the last few days had been paradise -- the beach, meeting the members of the community who surprisingly thought mickey was amazing, the food -- and Ian was feeling sappy.

He heaved himself out of bed, sleepily letting Mickey lead him out of the small motel room and down to the beach.

"Okay," mickey whispered, "look up."

Ian did - and his breath caught in his throat.

There were so many stars.

"Were far enough from the city that the light pollution isn't so bad," Mickey explained, "I cried like a baby the first time I saw it."

Yeah, Ian thought he might cry too.

They spread out a blanket and sit there for a long while, just staring. It was gorgeous -- Ian almost thought he could see the milky way.

"It's beautiful," Ian said, "worth getting out of bed for."

"It always is," Mickey said, so tenderly that Ian didn't need to look to know his husband was looking at him, not the sky.

[101maverick]

Prompt request: Secretly Atlantean gothamite saving Dick Grayson Robin from drowning in the bay. She recognizes his voice as her classmate crush.

They would ideally be 13-14 ish

A/n: okok this is soooo original i’m in loooveee. I did some research to find out where exactly the Gotham bay is in terms of city area and I hope i got it right :)) Also let’s ignore the fact this took me a whole month to finish, okay? Very sorry about the wait, life has been kicking my butt recently😅

Fishy Business

The water in Gotham was shit.

The pollution typical of every big American city was one thing, but whatever the heck Gotham had was ten times worse. Like, Chernobyl level bad.

Whatever filth was thrown in the waters of the Gotham Harbour on the daily definitely saw a lot of local chemical creations, the ones the city’s rogues were so fond of coming up with to terrorise the population.

Needless to say you would not be swimming in open waters any time soon.

You missed the ocean. You missed being in your element.

The fact you weren’t stupid enough to dare a swim in chemically spiked water didn’t negate the fact the Gotham Harbour was the only body of water you had available though, if not only to look at wistfully while mourning what you had before having to come to this forsaken city.

And that’s what you were doing when it happened. You had been stood up by your classmate and crush, Dick Grayson, for your chemistry study session. Neptune only knows how much that boy sucks at the subject, and the fact he skipped out on your study session made your insides flare up in indignation. Coming to the nearest body of water and reminiscing was the best way you knew of for letting go of ugly feelings.

Just letting your hair be lightly whipped around by the wind, staring wistfully into the last blazing scorches of the dying sun, standing on one of the docks and pretending the overwhelming smell of fish came from the dredges of the seaside market you used to camp out near as a kid.

Then, of course, it happened.

A loud crash startled you out of your musings, and you turned around just in time to see a figure splashing in the water a ways away.

Who the hell goes for an evening swim here? You thought to yourself as you made your way closer to the perturbed water, keeping to the elongated shadows born of the fish crates scattered around.

Once you were close enough to distinguish more of the figure, your eyes widened considerably.

The body flailing around in the murky water of the docks was none other than Robin, infamous sidekick to Gotham’s resident bat-themed vigilante.

Gotham’s resident vigilante that was very clear about his stance on super-powered beings in his territory.

You considered your options. If Batman knew his sidekick was saved by someone with very obviously atlantean powers he no doubt would clock you as somebody who wanted to mess with him, who was probably even spying on him due to the conveniency of the coincidence.

You did not want to find out what Batman did to people who not only disregarder his rules by merely existing in the wrong place, let alone what he did to people he thought were meddling in his business.

Plus, surely Robin could swim, right? He would have no problem getting out of the water by himself, so there was no need for your water-manipulation abilities anyway.

Despite your self-reassurances and the fact you should have been hightailing it out of there as fast as possible, uncertainty kept your feet rooted to the rotten wooden panels.

And so you kept watching, growing increasingly worried as Robin failed to keep his head outside of the water for more than a few seconds at a time.

You made it approximately thirteen seconds before saying ‘fuck it’ and stepping in, emerging from the shadows you had found refuge in just enough time get a good stance, planting your feet and raising your arms while letting your abilities reacquaint themselves with the water near you.

It was a fast affair, getting your powers to grasp at the water Robin was perturbing and pulling, violently yanking both the liquid and the boy out of the Harbor and onto the dock.

The vigilante gasped, gripping the material under him while hacking coughs wracked through his chest as he expelled the water from his human lungs.

You remained hovering above him, watching him, immensely glad the visible part of his face was regaining its normal colour instead of the red-purple it had previously been.

You had always looked upon Batman and Robin as pretty unapproachable, two beacons of justice and penance for Gotham’s criminals, who struck fear into even the most hardened thugs this rotten city had to offer.

But- but Robin was light to Batman’s darkness, and he always had a smile on his face in the grainy pictures that sometimes appeared in the newspaper, and if you focused your inhuman hearing on your surroundings late enough at night you could hear laughter mixing with the swoosh of the wind and the rustling of heavy fabric and the rhythmical zapping of a rope through the air.

And plus, Robin looked so human in this moment, so defenceless while he coughed his lungs out, that you just couldn’t reconcile the boy in front of you with the pillar of rambunctious justice fixed in your mind. And above all else, you couldn’t leave a human, one with so many enemies at that, alone while there was still the risk of him not being completely out of danger.

So you stayed.

You stayed, sat on an empty crate beside him, and kept vigilant with your enhanced senses to avoid any unwanted attention. As he calmed down he seemed to slowly gain awareness of his surroundings.

After what seemed like an eternity, he got his arms under him and slowly lifted himself up into a sitting position. That’s when he took notice of you, still watching him intently.

His eyes weren’t visible through the white-out lenses of his mask, but the way his forehead creased and his mouth opened a little more around his still heavy breaths made you able to accurately guess his surprise. “You- you just…what was-“

You interrupted him before he could keep voicing his question. “Look, just don’t tell the Bat about me and we’re good, okay? I really don’t need the trouble, plus you owe me one.”

Robin just kept looking at you, chest rising and falling with each deep breath, tiny shivers coursing through his soaking-wet form.

After a few beats that felt like eons, he nodded. “Yeah, yeah, don’t worry.” He half-gasped out, voice breathy with exertion. “Won’t tell a soul.”

His voice… it was achingly familiar.

You studied the unmasked portions of his face more closely, more attentively, your superhuman eyesight undisturbed by the darkness.

You were able to make out sun-kissed skin, soaked inky locks you fantasised about running your fingers through every day during chemistry, a defined jaw, high cheekbones and lips that pulled into semi-rare but blinding smiles. Lips you dreamed about kissing at night, while you lay on your bed thinking of your life.

You were sitting face-to-face with Dick Grayson. Robin.

You nodded, looking right into those white lenses. “Good.” At that, you looked around the empty area of the docks, spying the area sounds of fighting were coming from. “Well, I, uh, better go.”

You turned to him. “Try not to drown again, thanks.” And with that you stood.

Before walking away you turned around one last time, unable to stop yourself. “And, by the way, you stood me up for our chemistry study session. We’ll catch it up tomorrow.”

Before he could reply, you ran away from the docks and into Gotham Proper.

Gosh, you really were an idiot, weren’t you?

——————————

A/n: If you like my work, please consider reblogging and checking out my other works through the master list in my pinned post<3

[bitchesgetriches]

On poverty:

Starting from nothing

How To Start at Rock Bottom: Welfare Programs and the Social Safety Net

How to Save for Retirement When You Make Less Than $30,000 a Year

Ask the Bitches: “Is It Too Late to Get My Financial Shit Together?“

Understanding why people are poor

It’s More Expensive to Be Poor Than to Be Rich

Why Are Poor People Poor and Rich People Rich?

On Financial Discipline, Generational Poverty, and Marshmallows

Bitchtastic Book Review: Hand to Mouth by Linda Tirado

Is Gentrification Just Artisanal, Small-Batch Displacement of the Poor?

Coronavirus Reveals America’s Pre-existing Conditions, Part 1: Healthcare, Housing, and Labor Rights

Developing compassion for poor people

The Latte Factor, Poor Shaming, and Economic Compassion

Ask the Bitches: “How Do I Stop Myself from Judging Homeless People?“

The Subjectivity of Wealth, Or: Don’t Tell Me What’s Expensive

A Little Princess: Intersectional Feminist Masterpiece?

If You Can’t Afford to Tip 20%, You Can’t Afford to Dine Out

Correcting income inequality

1 Easy Way All Allies Can Help Close the Gender and Racial Pay Gap

One Reason Women Make Less Money? They’re Afraid of Being Raped and Killed.

Raising the Minimum Wage Would Make All Our Lives Better

Are Unions Good or Bad?

On intersectional social issues:

Reproductive rights

On Pulling Weeds and Fighting Back: How (and Why) to Protect Abortion Rights

How To Get an Abortion

Blood Money: Menstrual Products for Surviving Your Period While Poor

You Don’t Have to Have Kids

Gender equality

1 Easy Way All Allies Can Help Close the Gender and Racial Pay Gap

The Pink Tax, Or: How I Learned to Love Smelling Like “Bearglove”

Our Single Best Piece of Advice for Women (and Men) on International Women’s Day

Bitchtastic Book Review: The Feminist Financial Handbook by Brynne Conroy

Sexual Harassment: How to Identify and Fight It in the Workplace

Queer issues

Queer Finance 101: Ten Ways That Sexual and Gender Identity Affect Finances

Leaving Home before 18: A Practical Guide for Cast-Offs, Runaways, and Everybody in Between

Racial justice

The Financial Advantages of Being White

Woke at Work: How to Inject Your Values into Your Boring, Lame-Ass Job

The New Jim Crow, by Michelle Alexander: A Bitchtastic Book Review

Something Is Wrong in Personal Finance. Here’s How To Make It More Inclusive.

The Biggest Threat to Black Wealth Is White Terrorism

Coronavirus Reveals America’s Pre-existing Conditions, Part 2: Racial and Gender Inequality

10 Rad Black Money Experts to Follow Right the Hell Now

Youth issues

What We Talk About When We Talk About Student Loans

The Ugly Truth About Unpaid Internships

Ask the Bitches: “I Just Turned 18 and My Parents Are Kicking Me Out. How Do I Brace Myself?”

Identifying and combatting abuse

When Money is the Weapon: Understanding Intimate Partner Financial Abuse

Are You Working on the Next Fyre Festival?: Identifying a Toxic Workplace

Ask the Bitches: “How Do I Say ‘No’ When a Loved One Asks for Money… Again?”

Ask the Bitches: I Was Guilted Into Caring for a Sick, Abusive Parent. Now What?

On mental health:

Understanding mental health issues

How Mental Health Affects Your Finances

Stop Recommending Therapy Like It’s a Magic Bean That’ll Grow Me a Beanstalk to Neurotypicaltown

Bitchtastic Book Review: Kurt Vonnegut’s Galapagos and Your Big Brain

Ask the Bitches: “How Do I Protect My Own Mental Health While Still Helping Others?”

Coping with mental health issues

{ MASTERPOST } Everything You Need to Know about Self-Care

My 25 Secrets to Successfully Working from Home with ADHD

Our Master List of 100% Free Mental Health Self-Care Tactics

On saving the planet:

Changing the system

Don’t Boo, Vote: If You Don’t Vote, No One Can Hear You Scream

Ethical Consumption: How to Pollute the Planet and Exploit Labor Slightly Less

The Anti-Consumerist Gift Guide: I Have No Gift to Bring, Pa Rum Pa Pum Pum

Season 1, Episode 4: “Capitalism Is Working for Me. So How Could I Hate It?”

Coronavirus Reveals America’s Pre-existing Conditions, Part 1: Healthcare, Housing, and Labor Rights

Coronavirus Reveals America’s Pre-existing Conditions, Part 2: Racial and Gender Inequality

Shopping smarter

You Deserve Cheap Toilet Paper, You Beautiful Fucking Moon Goddess

You Are above Bottled Water, You Elegant Land Mermaid

Fast Fashion: Why It’s Fucking up the World and How To Avoid It

You Deserve Cheap, Fake Jewelry… Just Like Coco Chanel

6 Proven Tactics for Avoiding Emotional Impulse Spending

[utopians]

PSYCHO NYMPH EXILE // A SACRED AND TERRIBLE AIR

transcripts in alt text and under the cut

[image 1: black text on white background reading, "They evacuate people through the night cities, trying to outstrip perceived horizons of disintegration. These relocation attempts break down as matter ceases to perform. Fuel is water and water is air. Walls are soft. Push a truck until the wheels slough off. Sit on the couch and watch people with a little more energy take your food."]

[image 2: black text on a sepia background reading, "Then, when the stars bend under the destruction falling from above, many can no longer take the phrase “the end of the world” entirely seriously. The panic has cooled. In the strange indifference of the evacuation, whole families stay behind in Vaasa. There they play board games, in their houses, in their spacious apartments. They love vitamin-rich food, and when the pale is only a few days away, it’s always signalled by the same beautiful event. Fruits go mouldy. It grows vigorously on them. Children listen to oranges crackling on the table. Spores sprout from the pulp, apples are hairy with it. If you try to touch them, they crack open. No one knows why it’s like that. But few can muster the energy to be afraid of that time, and that's why I say it's beautiful."]

[image 3: black text on a white background reading, "Vellus and Isidol loot a mansion, kicking through walls like sand. The owner is looking for them with a flashlight, listening for the vibration of their hearts transmitted through the hollow surfaces, hunting for ghosts. They run, bending the taffy bars of the fence.

They scored a jacket and some dehydrated fruit. They curl up together in a funicular stranded on a rusty rail, cozy metal box with ashen windows, seat cushions for pillows.]

[image 4: black text on a sepia background reading, "Nothing seems to stop future ecologically-oriented projects there either. In the very last months, when the pale is creeping across the ocean towards Vaasa, lobby groups against light pollution see their grand dream come true. Industrial and commercial buildings turn off artificial lighting at the end of the working day, and street lamps are shielded with special filters. As the first and last big city in the history of the world, Vaasa completely eliminates light pollution. This isn’t just a measure against bomb raids – it also saves birds who might otherwise get lost in the city's maze of lights, and harbour seals whose mating rhythms are disrupted when the day is too long. You may laugh at this, but in the evening, when the big world in the distance swells into a bloody maelstrom, families come out into the street in Vaasa and are insignificant together. Only distant explosions disturb the deep peace of the winter night, its flawless starry sky. Everyone watches, heads tilted back."]

[image 5: black text on a white background reading, "The sun shines like a sick moon.

Holding hands, feeling her thin and brittle wrist. Rubbing her palm nervously, like you always did, leaves flakes now, ashen thumbprints.

Vellus and Isidol are becoming part of the dust storm."]

[image 6: black text on a sepia background that reads, "Like everyone else, she can't do anything in this extended stay, where one’s sense of the present slowly drifts away. But whereas the others dissolve into their memories, she simply disappears. It’s as if her life had never happened. The past is not awaiting her return. She just wanders around the rooms, adjusts her grandmother's lace doily and bedspreads, arranges the curtains on the rails. And thus, tastefully, she refuses to indulge in those ecstasies which visit the human spirit when the world is disintegrating. Nothing leaves her hands, and nothing returns.

When Katla finally sinks into the pale, Ann-Margret Lund turns, without the slightest pleasure, into a protein mass."]

[tparker48]

Request from Anonymous

Evening had arrived as the streets of the neighborhood began to quiet down. Cars pulled into their driveways, people from inside heading into their homes. In a car resting inside a garage, would be a man named Hogan. He yawned as he got out of the car, tossing his safety cap to his workshop tool table near the front of his car. He dragged his feet toward the main door, and the cold breath of the air washed over him. The corners of his construction gear bulged into his arm pits, the sound of tears seething from his shoulders. He lowered his bag toward the wall, and his body became lighter, like a boulder had just been lifted from his back.

“One down, now I just gotta get these..” He sucked in his gut, grabbing the zipper of his uniform as his stomach bounced across his waistline. Sawdust splashing into the air, casting its particles into the sunlight as they danced from the laundry room window. He took to his pants, and let out a satisfied grunt as he kicked his boots off. “That’s better.”

He kicked the leathery shoes next to the washer machine, tossing his clothes into the opening as he walked bare into the living room. He grabbed his headset from the living room table and put them on. He crashed to his stomach on the floor, his console turning on along the shelf. After hours of work, what better way to unwind than through quality gaming.

He crashed to his stomach on the floor, his console turning on along the shelf. "Let's see what the boys are up to on deathwatch."

He flipped through the screen to his game, turning on his microphone as he searched through the lobby.

—--------

An hour had gone by since Hogan started to relax, enjoying the peace of enjoying the peace of with his online friends. The screen flashed with chaos as effects danced around the frame, Hogan’s call outs booming through the acoustic’s of the living room. But  another chaos brewed in the shadows, as a small pair of eyes peeked from the folds of a crumpled towel. Inside, would be Peppe, staring at his hubby’s backside.

“He’s finally home.” he said, a low giggle escaping from him. “Took longer than expected, but at least it gave me time to prepare.”

He dug into his pocket and fetched a tiny piece of gum, unwrapping its plastic blanket as it overtook his chest. He folded into a cubed shaped ball, and chewed at its end until the entire thing fit into his mouth. He savored the fruity flavor filling his mouth as he slinked out from beneath the towel, the smell of gas fumes polluting the air as the giant soles raked through the fibers of the carpet. 

He crept faster, the path narrowing as it centered toward Hogan. A mountain of hairy muscle rose before him, the elastic fabric over the mounds spreading atop like a blanket of snow.  After many times of venturing to his ass, he got tired of the view. It reminded him of being on an island, guarded by a musky volcano as it swayed overhead. He’d think he’d feel bad pranking his hubby all the time, but damn did it feel good to watch him squirm. And with an opportunity like this, it was too good to pass up.

He approached the crease between Hogan’s legs, the lining of crack rocketing over the bubbled ridge. He stepped upon the bulk of his crotch, sweat oozing from its surface like a leaking sponge. Must’ve been working hard out there on the construction, he thought, even after an hour of cooling still his backside was wet.

“Typical, Hogan. Big guy’s certainly not making it easy.” he rolled his eyes, gripping into the white fabrice along the left leg.

He clung to the bushed of hair, pushing into the thick borders sealing the mounds inside. His foot creased into a loose fold, warmth from beneath the fabric against as the smell of fresh sweat poured into his nose. He puffed his nose to ease its stinging sensation, continuing his climb aboard the mounds.

Sausage fingers reached from the other mound, piercing the lining of his crack Peppe dragged to the center. “Damn sweat’s going in the wrong places.” Hogan said, sliding his now glistening palm from the crack.

"Easy horsie, can't have your rider bucking off with the reins." Peppe whispered.  

He climbed to the top of Hogan’s ass and caught a glimpse of the horizon. A slope met before him as it climbed to a meaty neck above, the Tv screen flashing behind Hogan’s frenzied hair. He cherished the view for a moment before digging through his pocket, pulling a bulky string from inside. He opened his mouth and stuck the end of the string against the sticky mass, molding it with his tongue to ensure it was secure.

 Phase one of his great prank was complete, now it was time for the main event.

He approached the top of the elastic fabric, peeling a corer for himself as he tucked his feet inside. He shimmied himself between the mounds, watching the warm flesh rise as they spilled over his chest. Hogan’s fingers returned, stamping just a foot from Peppe as it stirred in place. 

“That works.” He said, shimmying the rest of his body as he slipped beneath the surface.

 The damp fingers wagged above as he dove into the mounds, flesh molding his body as they swallowed the light. Strands of hair snagged at his limbs, the scent of dry cement reaping his nostrils as sweat dashed into his clothes. After all was said and done, he had to remind Hoga to take a shower. Any more scents added to his musk and he’d be a walking gas station. The hairs thickened as they spread into him like a brush, revealing a red puckered star as it winked with sweat. It blew kisses as Peppe wisped past its folds, cushioning at the bottom as his foot sank between two soft boulders. 

“Target acquired,” He spat the gum from his mouth. “and just enough hair to strap on.”

He placed the wad against the ridge of the hair taint, cherry picking bunched hair as he molded them into the gum like clay. Hogan’s  legs shuffled, scooping Peppe close as he planted against the warm testicles.  

"What’s this guy teabagging for? Our team won that fair and square! Let me get a crack at him, I'll give him some nuts he can teabag!"

“As competitive as ever” Peppe mumbled, peeling from the damp skin. He spun a portion of the string to anchor Hogan’s hairs. They sprawled out like a row of vines, their sweat soaked surface brushing against him as if it were a paint brush. Before long, the task was complete, hairs wrapping around the gum as if they were holding it up. “Like a bouquet of smelly vines.” he patted at the top of the gum.

He crawled toward the bottom of Hogan's balls, the dampened fabric appearing as it stretched behind him. Peppe followed its path until it curved upward, taking to the thick hairs covering the mounds as he crawled back the way he came.  They slid through his fingers, his body cast back down as he tumbled into the mustache covering his anus. Its bristles tickled his nose as he swatted them away, grabbing a handful in a bunch as he climbed up its length. 

“Yeah that’s right, take all these nuts!”Hogan roared, his own thighs moving as the sac below squished into the fabric. 

Peppe fought its sway, gripping harder at the strands of hair as he reached  toward the slanted lighting of the crack. He slithering his palm back into the cool world of the living room, shimmying the rest of him through the caked mounds before Pulling the rest of the rope out of his pocket.

“Alright..that’s my workout for today.” Peppe wheezed.

 He climbed back to the top of Hogan’s waist, and looked to his head. Still he faced the Tv screen, even after traveling through his underwear. Just what he was expecting, and now it was time to retrieve the fruits of his labor. Wrapped the end of the rope around his wrist, the line straightening as it darted beneath the fabric like an anchor.

“Oh ho, prepare for a sting of your life Hogan.”

"Well done guys, we managed to pass that squad without setting them off. Too bad we can’t say the same for you..”the mute icon appeared on the side of the screen,Hogan batting an eye backwards. “..Peppe.” 

He froze at his words. “Huh?!”

 the string tightened as he yanked him beneath the underwear, like a fish caught on a hook as he burrowed through the mound of flesh. The dimmed space greeted him once more, his face dragged along the hairs resting in the bubbled valley. From what took minutes turned to mere seconds as he was dragged beneath the bulk of the testicles, fingers fiddling at the string as if it were a spider retracting its web. His back clung to the wad of gum at the taint, the fingers taking to his side as they jammed him beneath the muscular boulders. He gritted beneath its weight, the clammy skin spooning his ears as they acted as restraints on his head.

The ground shifted as  fingers pulled the waistband apart, Hogan’s face peering inside. "What do we have here, a munchkin taking a dip in my underwear."

Peppe shuffled a fold from his mouth. "What gave me away?"

"Come now, as many times as you explored my body, don't you think I would know if something complex was in the way?" He dwindled a finger through his pubes decorating the round spheres between his legs, swirling a patch of Peppe’s into the mix. "Hair pulling. Tsk, you gotta do better than that, dumpling."

"What can I say? It's a classic."

"Uh huh, charming. You know you're getting  punished for this right? I missed a lot of shots because of your meddling. Naught, naughty." He squeezed his legs together, Peppe’s lips smacking as they puckered like a fish. "Unfortunately we’re still in a game, so consider this a taste of what’s to come."

His smile disappeared as the waistband clamped at his waist, a gust of musk washing into Peppe before the thighs shifted, and  Hogan’s weight pushed at his back. "Hubby! Come on, you can’t be made at this face. You can’t do this to your dump-" a solid surface cushioned his chin, the bulk of the giant testicles plonking atop his head. “pling..”

A soft chuckle vibrated the walls. "Oh no, you’re not getting off that easy, hun. No matter how adorable that face is."

Taking the slow route huh? Just like him to toy with him slowly. Peppe rolled his eyes forward,wiggling his head to relieve pressure from his chin. Sloshing muffled from the orbs cupping his face, like giant silos filled to the brim with water. Its body heat grew hotter as its muscle flexed, the shaft knocking out of place as it drooled into the white fabric. He was getting off at my capture, and he called him the naughty one.

But even caught, he wasn’t going to give up just yet. He shifted his gaze into one of the orbs, inhaling the dried sweat coating the skin as he leaned his fingers to his jacket. He pulled the bottom of the fabric from his pants, shedding from its layer as he pressed it into the clammed ceiling. He gazed into the maw of the musky cave, the loose skin sagging as if were going to collapse. 

 There wasn’t enough room to pull the string, but he wasn’t without options as he looked to the flexing muscle.  He laid upon his back, taking a handful of the soft skin as he pulled himself upward. The humidity between was rough feet, his skin skidding against Hogan’s as it peeled off like a sticker. The skin only grew firm as he reached the stem of Hogan’s cock, its barreled underbelly cushioning his chin. After moments of climbing, he sighed as the ever growing pressure slipped from his feet, the bag of sac collecting as the length of the shaft rested upon him.

He planted his feet upon the balls, and Hogan shifted. "What are you doing down there?"

"Putting my plan into motion. I'm gonna make you submit to your dumpling!" Peppe declared.

"Sure. And just how are you going to do that."

A smile crept along Peppe’s face, a foot peeling from one of the testicles. "Creativity." He spread his toes across the bulging testicle, and wiggled them into the tender muscle. He added his other foot, and pressed it to the other as he marched over them. 

A groan rumbled through the air, a thigh thrusting and a clunk came from outside. “Mmm..kneading my balls huh? Bold, I’ll give you that, but it's gonna take more than a few foot rubs to get me to cave.”

"That's for sure. This is just the appetizer." He cradled his limbs to the corner of the member, holding it against his body as if it were a body pillow. He worked himself beneath its underbelly to the top of the shroomed head. Its flesh radiated with warmth greater than the balls below, a salty stream spilling upon his shoulder as it guzzled from the slit. He ringed his fingers between its lips, the stream widening as it spilled at his neck. "You know the thing about being small? You can reach just about anywhere?"

He wiggled a palm over the slit, and jammed it inside. Its creamy fluid lubricated his arm, driving it to his shoulder as the lips clamped onto his shoulder like a sleeve. He plunged his other hand inside, and began to twist them through  the soggy folds as it trailed through the tight opening of the shaft.

Hogan’s body bucked, a sharp moan piercing the air as the sounds of buttons clacked from above "Oh..ff.."

Peppe's eyes became starry eyed. "Gotcha now."

He wormed more of his body toward the front of the underwear’s pouch, clinging his feet to the puffed edges as they peeled the hood away. The muffled grunts turned to purrs, Hogan’s entire waist beginning to thrash as if it were in a trap.

"Still thinking about surrendering?" Peppe giggled with excitement, grinding his elbows to circle the rest of his arms between the tight tube.

A digital voice announced that the game paused, the sound of a controller toppling to the side. "Give me 2 minutes,boys." Hogan's voice boomed, the space shifting as. Gravity tossed Peppe atop the bulging cock.

The inner tube tightened his arms like a vice, its girth nudging between his legs. The fabric yanked off and light blurred his vision, forcing Peppe to wince as his eyes raced to adjust. His gaze eventually relaxed, As Hogan’s met his, peering from the mountainous torso  high above.

"Now you done it, dumpling. You managed to make me cave?”

"I did? I mean yeah, I did! Take that, Hubby.” He declared, but looked up to a smile peering across his face. “You uh..you aren’t mad are you?”

“Me? Not all. In fact, I'm ecstatic.”

“You..are?”

“Yeah..” He replied. A palm raised beneath him, clasping at the center of the shaft. It pumped at a steady pace, getting stronger as it gripped at Peppe’s arms. “I get to do punishment early.”

Oh shit. Peppe tugged at his arms to get them free, shimmying his shoulders to lighten the pressure, but a suction locked them down, the cock’s throat pulsing as they tucked his arms together. Fingers curled around his back, hoisting his lower half into the center as it tilted toward the cock slit. He wrestled between the thick fingers, a thumb pressing his head into the lips as they  gummed the sides of his cheek.

The thumb trailed over his neck to the rest of his body, plunging Peppe deeper into the urethra. He was caught in the pull of the suction inside, guiding him through the tight crawlway of the tube as seed lathered into his side like lotion. The tender walls manhandled his body, thrashing him about in its attempts to gobble him up. The lips slipped higher, funneling to the tips of his toes as he sunk deeper. The cool air left from his feet, and the shaft became alive as its walls tenderized his body.

Outside, a lump traversed through the cock's underbelly bulging, sliding down at snail's pace as it flattened against Hogan’s twisting palm. He gritted his teeth, pumping harder to knock the protruding bulge from its spot as he massaged its soft ridges as it parted the walls inside. It bobbed over the base of his shaft, a finger tilting it for Hogan to see for himself. With a simple clench, the bulge launched and it plunged past the surface of his crotch, its form wisping through his inside as it curled down to the meaty low hangers throbbing below.

The World was dimmer in this region of Hogan’s body, the waves of muscle squeezing him like toothpaste through the tubes. He couldn’t move his body, his blood rushing to his head as he tried to face upward. He doubted it’d help with the surrounding fluid, gunks of slated goo lathered his face, sending his senses ablaze as his head began to swirl. The wall hugged closer as an opening arrived, his head smothered as  more salty fumes spewed into him like a ventilated shaft. 

He found himself in a round chamber, white goo secreting from the walls as they collected into a large body at the bottom of the fleshy dome. 

"Your balls?” He shouted, the sphincter encircling his neck. “Who shoves their love life into their balls?"

“Consider it a special treatment just for you. I was going to just shove you into one of my boots, but then you went and got me hard.”

Lumps caved from the walls, and the chamber became slanted. The white goo rose like a roaring tide, submerging Peppe’s head beneath its surface. It shrouded like a fog, the pink walls near him blurring with white smudges.

“Quite the load isn’t it dumpling? All thanks to you.” 

the tight tube squeezed at his body, rocketing him into the milky mess as he flailed to the surface. He inhaled the tainted air, splashing to keep himself afloat. "Okay, foul play! You’re playing dirty, how am I supposed to have fun in here?"

“Sorry, hun, that’s not my problem. You’ll just have to sit in timeout like a good boy.”

 The chamber flipped once more, spiraling Peppe  from wall to wall as if it were a tube mixer. He felt nauseous as he dunked and emerged from its gooey surface, his efforts to cease derailed as his palmed slid from the soft wall. It was only when the pool flipped to the ceiling did the swirls cease, and it crashed atop of him.

Hogan’s laugh vibrated the walls, crusts forming into the seed as it rocked in place.. "Ready to call it quits?" 

"You..can't possibly think..I'd give up after that." Peppe panted, his head spinning amongst the seed.

"Yeah I thought not, you’re too stubborn for that. Ah well, perhaps a little marinating will teach you to behave yourself." The chamber swayed as steps rang through the walls, the fluid jumping as it crashed upon a solid surface. "I'm back boys, what I miss?"

Peppe groaned as Hogan faced his attention elsewhere, his head bobbing against the milky waves as he tilted to the ceiling. He looked to the shriveled star in the ceiling, seed squeezing from its folds like a wet rag. That was his way out of this filled chamber, but it was too out of reach to grasp. He pawed at the doughy walls for leverage, hoisting upon the soft lumps to escape the milky pond. But their surface melted upon contact, spilling him into the seed once more.

“This is getting me nowhere, how’s a guy supposed to move when everything around you is muscle?” He tried again to reach for a fold, its surface slipping into the fluid as it glossed the wall beneath.

A moan erupted from above, the walls caving as waves splashed him in its epicenter. He resurfaced, looking to the walls as they battered the fluid along his borders. “He felt that?” He puzzled, swimming to the wall behind him. 

He smeared a layer of gunk from the lumpy surface, cupping his palm to split its flow to the rest of the seed. When clear pink muscle appeared, he pressed his fingertips into the soft wall, twisting it as it sunk breath its surface.

The walls shook again, and Hogan’s moans returned. When it finally settled, a smile crept upon his face. To think Hubby’s sweet spot would be right at the source of it all.  He swam closer to the wall, tapping his foot at the submerged flesh. When soft ground touched his toes, he shifted his legs into a running motion, his feet pattering against the muscular wall.

A sharp moan echoed the walls, Waves splashing in the seed. "What are you doing now?" Hogan's voice muffled.

"Improvising." he turned himself toward the wall of flesh, grabbing a handful as seed lubricated his hands. The chamber unraveled, globs of gunk slamming against the opposite wall as it crashed at the ceiling before it pattered onto his shoulders.

Hogan’s grunts turned to whimpers as the folds compressed and expanded,it battered its contents. "Stop being.. a brat." he strained, the walls beginning to pulse..

The seed’s current grew stronger, sweeping Peppe from the walls as he swirled around the rim.The walls compressed, and the ceiling closed in as the sphincter spasmed in place.

"Almost there, just one more push.." he assured himself, clinging to the corner of the folds to continue his efforts.

 The once spacious chamber shrunk to the size of a quarter, a mere gap separating Peppe from the chamber’s quivering lips. He massaged its folds to the best of his ability, the substance overtaking his arms as they splashed about his wrist. The walls squeeze closer as the fluid reached his chin, forcing him to tuck his nose close to the salty folds. 

"Here goes nothing." he managed to muster, taking a breath as he kissed into the center of the sphincter.

He sunk beneath the seed’s surface, suspended in the middle of the sac as the walls surrounding him became restless. Hogan’s grunt's grew louder, distorted as they became strained. Hard thumps shook the chamber, and the star above winked before it opened its entrance like a floodgate. A suction dragged at his body, pulling him against the widening entrance. Its lips barely passed his shoulder, the current flowing through his armpit as he held his breath.

A watery slosh echoed the chamber, before Hogan’s roar overwhelmed it.

---------------------------------------------------

Hogan’s body tensed, the controller in his hand slipping to the pocket of the couch. He stared weakly at his seed soaked palm, its grip still stroking his shaft as his hips bucked. "Can’t.. Hold it in..I.." he choked on his words, his head launching back into the cushion of his sofa. 

His hips locked, and seed erupted from his cock. Its warm fluid flowed like lava from an active volcano, a creamy stream filling his shorts as another drenched the corners of the chamber. He huffed as he regained control of his body, looking down to his member. its meaty length throbbed against his inner thigh, satisfied as it returned to its flaccid state.

In his weak stare, he looked to his bulging sac, the swollen orbs drooping over the side of the couch. "You kinky bastard.." he huffed softly, staring at the right nut that rocked slowly.

Inside, the pond had all but drained from inside the chamber, reduced to a hollow husk as fluid dressed the walls in webs. Stuck against the ceiling, Peppe remained, smothered by a wad of gunk as it dripped to the bottom of the chamber.

"I told ya..I wasn't finished." He smiled weakly, peeled from the ceiling as if he were a sticker. The chamber softened his fall, as it rocked slowly.. "How'd your game go?"

Hogan looked toward the screen, bits of his fluid dripping from the corners of the frame. Banter boomed from the microphone, gamertags from both his team and the opposite team flashing,

"Eh, they’ll.” he said. "Really wanted to get that streak. Was gonna get it too, until a twerp decided to get frisky.

"oo bummer." Peppe said. “Guess it goes to show you can’t shove something in your balls and not expect consequences.”

A flick shook the testicle. "Don't be so high and mighty, Dumpling. You're still in punishment time. But since you saved me the trouble of unloading in there, it’s only fair you do your part in making it.”

“You want me to make the pool all over again, didn’t you just climax?” Peppe asked, picking up a soft huff from the walls. “Wait a second, you’re not trying to get me to build up all that just for you to enjoy it personally?”

“I..I have no idea what you’re talking about. It’s simply a fitting punishment for a brat like you.” he said. “Just be sure to rub them deep. So..so I’ll know if you’re doing your task.”

Peppe places his hands at his hips. “Uh huh, sure.” he traveled through the mush  of seed toward the wall, reaching at a palm as he scratched at its surface. The chamber jostled in place, heavy thumps returning as they shook the walls.

“Oo..just a little to the right..”

“Do you want me to pleasure you with both my hands, Hogan?”

“Yeah..Er! I mean no-”

“Hah, gotcha. You’re totally into this!”

“Why you little-..this is supposed to be punishment. You’re not supposed to be enjoying this!”

“It’s not like I’m going anywhere. If I’m gonna be put to work, I might as well have fun with it, right? Oo! Now that I think about it, this space is just enough to bounce around it.”

“Dumpling, I forbid you to even try- Mm! No stop-mm..eassy in there!”

[seat-safety-switch]

Something about the way that Big Business likes to operate in this country rubs me the wrong way. They stride into little, upstanding communities and push them around to get a slightly better deal on extracting our precious, non-renewable natural resources. Only pollution and human misery is left behind. For a brief, shining moment, I was the solution to this corruption. And then I kind of let things go to my head.

Running for office is easier than you'd think. All you need to do is get signatures of a hundred people. An afternoon at the mall, asking folks to save the endangered Pacific African Grey Rhino, will just about do you. Of course, there's also the filing fee, but I managed to distract the lady working the counter at City Hall and transfer the cheque from another mayoral application to mine when she wasn't looking.

Quite why I fell out of favour with The Mayor is between him and I. We go way back, and it would not reflect well on my upbringing to reveal our private feud in public. Not like it stopped him, though, as he blabbed to every talk-radio host, morning-news talking head, and local newspaper about how awful I was. They just laughed, thinking that nobody could be that bad, and surely it was some kind of desperate lie, another sign that he had lost touch with the common man. Such embellishment did get my name in the public ear, and I won in a landslide after promising to double speed limits (that's all it takes.)

From day one, I went about kicking all the huge-capitalism greedheads out of my city, mostly because I got tired of them driving their Porsches slowly on my newly speed-unlimited corners. Big lawsuits were launched, rich folks ejected into the nearest river. I was on the news every day in my stained coveralls and greasy sweater, adding further credibility to my regular-dude motif. If you were some kind of crank weirdo who liked to tell other people at the bar what the government should do, then I was your representative. And crank it I did. Wait, that came out wrong.

After about a week of this, I think the big business monsters got together. They went to their little gangster restaurant and they decided the best way to get rid of me would be to catch me up in a bribery scandal. Didn't work: I took the bribe and bragged about it to the news. That bribe? 2005 Dodge Neon, with an un-torn drivers' seat and only about 180,000 km on the odometer. Mint. They did their homework. The problem was that I now had a fancy new car, which I had effectively stolen from rich people, but I didn't want to look rich, so I didn't drive it to work.

The problem is that I slowly became paranoid. As with my forebear, I lost touch with the common man. I began to fear that they were going to steal my Neon – my retirement fund – while I was at City Hall, doing stupid mayor stuff. Soon, I lost focus on my work, and I slipped in the polls. There was only one thing left to do: stop coming to work for a few weeks and don't answer the phone. Works every time!

[engie-ivy]

Hi! I really like your writing, could you possibly write a fanfic where Remus is a confident gorgeous bastard and Sirius is a flustered mess?

(Hi @arcades-n-academia! You might not even remember this request, with how long it took me to answer. I guess it took some time for a good idea to come to me, and then to find time to actually write it? I would say I hope it's worth the wait, but with how long the wait was that might be pushing it😅 Anyway, without further ado, I present to you:

Confident Gorgeous Remus Lupin and Flustered Mess Sirius Black!)

Being handsome, smart and successful, Remus has his choice of men. So he's allowed to have standards, right? And he has a type, namely confident and intelligent men who know what they are doing. Unfortunately, Sirius Black, easy on the eyes as he might be, is none of those things.

Or so Remus thought.

A New Side

Remus is feeling quite chipper. He's walking down the street carrying two boxes with cake from his favourite bakery, on his way to the office where he worked for the past year.

Remus is a renowned environmental scientist, but he took a break from that line of work to join an environmental law firm. He had wanted to learn more about the legal side of protecting the environment. What arguments are the big corporations using to deny accountability for the pollution they are causing? What data can these environmental lawyers use to prove these corporations are responsible? What evidence of the consequences for the environment is sufficiently compelling to a judge?

In return for learning the ropes of environmental law, Remus has been serving as an expert witness in their cases, and has consulted on scientific matters.

All in all, it has been a good year. Remus had a great time at the company, they made him feel at home and he truly learned a lot. But while he's going to miss the people, hard-working and dedicated to making the world a better place, he's excited to go back to his true passion: scientific research. He's got plenty of ideas, and he's excited to re-join his research team and get started.

Last Friday was officially his last day at the law firm, and since he's still got one week off before he'll take up his old job again, he's dropping by the office today to bring some cake and thank them for the past year.

As Remus pushes open the door, the first person he's greeted by is, unfortunately, Gilderoy Lockhart.

Alright, maybe when he says 'hard-working and dedicated to making the world a better place', that doesn't include everyone.

Lockhart doesn't particularly care about making the world better, he cares more about creating an image of himself as someone who is making the world better. He wants that aesthetic of a handsome, noble lawyer fighting for the good cause. Without doing the actual work, that is. Lockhart is known for doing nothing while taking credit for everything.

They would've kicked him out, if he didn't have a talent for charming people. Especially middle-aged women appear to be quite fond of him. Middle-aged women with too much money looking for a good cause to support. So since Lockhart is so proficient in bringing in donations, they continue to tolerate him.

"Lupin," Lockhart smiles. "Well, isn't today your lucky day."

'Because after today I never have to see you again?' Remus wants to say, but he holds it back. No, he went an entire year without clashing with Lockhart, he's not going to ruin it now. So he forces a smile. "And why is that, Lockhart?"

"Because today is the day you're getting the chance to go on a date with me," Lockhart smirks.

Remus blinks. "Sorry?"

"Yes, you heard that right," Lockhart says, still smirking. "You get to go on a date with me."

"That's… flattering, I suppose, but I'm sorry," Remus shakes his head. "I'm not interested."

Lockhart is silent for a moment, then he lifts his chin and tightens his jaw. "See for yourself then, Lupin. Your loss."

"Remus, you gotta help us out."

Fabian and Gideon have stopped him in the hallway.

"We keep arguing about it," Fabian says.

"So we need you to decide," Gideon adds.

"We usually don't go for the same guy, so this is new to us," Fabian sighs.

"We can't agree upon which one of us gets to ask you out, so we decided to leave it up to you," Gideon shrugs.

"So you need to tell us, Remus," Fabian urges.

"Which one of us would you rather go out with?" They both ask at the same time.

Remus looks from one brother to the other. "I like you both, as good friends."

Fabian cringes and Gideon dramatically places a hand over his heart. "Autch."

"Oh, come on," Remus says. "You can't expect me to choose one of you to date! That's just asking for trouble. Believe me, this is for the best."

"Alright, we normally don't go there, but since it's you, we are willing to make an exception," Fabian says.

"So what about dating both of us at the same time?" Gideon asks.

"Bye, Fabian! Bye, Gideon!" Remus starts to walk away. "Nice catching up with you!"

"You don't know what you'll be missing out on!" Fabian, or maybe Gideon, calls after him.

Benjy keeps nervously fiddling with his tea bag. "So… ehm, I mean, like, we won't see each other at work anymore, and I just thought… I hoped… I wanted to ask… If you don't mind, of course, maybe we could see each other outside of work? You know. Like dinner. If you like to have dinner. With me."

Remus stops from where he had been going through the cabinets of the office kitchen looking for cake forks to look at Benjy. "Oh, Benj… That sounds lovely, really. But truthfully, I'm not looking for anything right now, so it's probably best not to, as I don't want to give you the wrong idea."

It's not exactly true. Remus is quite open to someone storming into his life and sweeping him off of his feet, but Benjy isn't the 'storming in and sweeping you off of your feet'-type. He's the 'carefully shuffling in and awkwardly stammering if he may perhaps attempt to sweep you off of your feet'-type. Not that he isn't a great guy. Remus is sure that there's someone out there who's going to look at Benjy and see him worrying his lip and nervously wringing his hands, and think it's just the cutest thing ever.

But that someone isn't Remus. He needs a man who has a bit more fire in him.

After avoiding an awkward situation with Caradoc Dearborn, by pretending to think the flowers Dearborn gives him are only to thank him for his work in the past year, and Dearborn luckily takes the hint and plays along, Remus runs into Kingsley. At first, Remus is relieved that it's just his work buddy Kingsley, but when Kinsley leans against the wall beside him and gives him that smile, he knows enough.

"No, Kingsley," he says firmly. "No. We are friends. We work well as friends. We are not going to change that."

Kingsley lets his head fall against the wall and lets out a dramatic sigh. "You are a cruel, cruel man, Remus Lupin," he says, but he's smiling as he pushes himself off of the wall. "Well, it was worth a try, but I know a lost cause when I see one."

Remus lets out a relieved sigh as he closes the door to the break room behind him. Mary from Communications, Marlene the Office Manager and Lily from HR look up from their coffee.

"Oh my god!" Mary jumps to her feet and runs up to him. "Cake!" She exclaims, snatching the boxes from his hands.

"Happy to see you too, Mary," Remus says, rolling his eyes.

Mary sits down and flips open one of the boxes. "White chocolate pistachio! You're my hero."

Remus drops down on a chair with a sigh. "Has Mary brought her 'special' brownies to the office again?"

Mary glares at him, swallowing down a mouth full of frosting. "That happened once and it was an accident!" She says. "I took the wrong batch with me."

"I'm not complaining," Marlene smirks. "Best day I've ever had at the office."

"What makes you think the whole office is on drugs?" Lily asks Remus. "Again," she adds, almost as an afterthought.

"Just on the way here," Remus says. "Like, six co-workers asked me out!"

Marlene laughs. "Of course they did!"

Lily leans forward, resting her head on her hands. "Come on, Remus. You must know what's going on."

Remus blinks at her. "I promise you that I really do not."

"This company has a strict No Dating-Policy for its employees," Lily says. "But as of today, you," she points her finger at Remus. "Are no longer an employee."

"Which means…" Remus begins.

"Which means that all those thirsty men who have been lusting after you for the past year can finally shoot their shot!" Mary finishes.

Remus looks at Lily, but she just points at Mary and nods.

"It's true, Rem," Marlene says. "I almost had to ask the janitor to mob the floor in the meeting room after each of your presentations, with how much those guys were drooling!"

"And who can blame them?" Mary says, before Remus can protest. "You, standing there, with that casually tousled hair going on, wearing that button-up with the top buttons undone and your sleeves rolled up to your elbows, talking about critical deposition values, just oozing that whole 'Sexy Professor'-vibe…"

"There's nothing sexy about critical deposition values!" Remus protests, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Say critical deposition values one more time," Mary says, throwing her head back and letting out a fake moan.

Remus flicks a pistachio at her head. "You're a menace."

Mary sticks out her tongue and takes another bite of cake.

Remus shakes his head. "Good god, if that is the case, in retrospect, I'm very thankful for that No Dating-Policy. At least now I only have to endure this awkwardness for one day."

"Two days," Lily corrects. "You have to come to the office party this Friday!"

Remus raises his eyebrows. "Party? Are we celebrating?"

A huge grin appears on Lily's face. "Indeed we are! We won the case against Exxon!" She cheers.

Remus stares at her. "The case against… No way!"

"Way!"

Remus laughs out loud. "Oh my god! That's amazing! I can hardly believe it! I thought that case was mostly symbolic? That we didn't have a chance at actually winning?"

"So did I!" Lily exclaims.

"So did everyone!" Mary exclaims.

Marlene shakes her head with a huge grin on her face. "But don't tell Sirius he can't do something!"

"Wait," Remus says. "Back up. Sirius? As in Sirius Black?"

"No, Remus. One of the many other Siriuses that work here," Lily deadpans. "Yes, Sirius Black! Why does that surprise you?"

"No reason, just…" Remus shrugs awkwardly. "Well, he isn't exactly the sharpest tool in the shed, is he?"

All three girls stare at him like he has grown two heads.

"Remus," Lily eventually manages to say. "I don't know what kind of tools you have in your shed, but in most sheds, they don't come much sharper than Sirius Black. He graduated top of his year from Harvard Law, he takes on the most challenging cases from all our lawyers, and still manages to win more cases than any of the other lawyers, our biggest clients almost always request for him by name to represent them, and he receives about five offers per week from corporate offices willing to pay him at least five times what we can afford." She shakes her head. "We're lucky he's so dedicated to the cause, otherwise we would never have been able to keep him.

Remus blinks. "Really? Okay. Wow. That's… not what I expected."

The first time Remus saw Black, their conversation went something like this:

"Hi! I'm your new colleague, Remus Lupin. Nice to meet you!"

"Uh, yeah."

"So… what kind of work do you do?"

"I… ehm, I work for an environmental law firm."

"...Yes. I know. We're colleagues. I mean what sort of work do you do within the firm?"

"Oh, yes, I work in environmental law. I do law work. For… the environment."

"Right."

After that conversation, Remus had concluded that, despite what his first name might suggest, Sirius Black wasn't exactly a bright light. Their following conversations had only confirmed his suspicions.

"Hey Black. That's quite a stack of papers you're carrying. Big case?"

"Oh, no, just a normal briefcase fits fine."

"Oh, Black, can I get your opinion on the presentation I gave at the meeting this morning? What did you think of the slides?"

"I loved them! They were nice!"

"Yeah, thanks, but were they clear enough?"

"Oh, yes! I could see them very well. With the blue background and white letters. Very clear."

"No, I mean… You know what, nevermind."

Remus had assumed that Black, not being the sharpest mind, must be some sort of an assistant to the lawyers, searching files, copying documents, writing minutes, that sort of work.

Remus also thought, and he's rather ashamed to admit this, that maybe they employed Black because of his father, the infamous cut-throat corporate lawyer Orion Black. Maybe they thought that Orion Black would go a bit more easy on them when meeting them across the courtroom if his son worked for them. Though if that was the case, it was to no avail. If anything, Orion Black seems even more determined to take their firm down any chance he gets.

Remus even thought, and yes, he's even more ashamed to admit this, that the only reason they kept Black around could be because the man is so easy on the eyes.

"So, what made you think Sirius is a dummy?" Mary asks cheerfully.

"I've been trying to get to know him, but it's hard to learn more about someone when they can't hold a bloody conversation," Remus says defensively. "I swear, every time I try to talk to him, the guy can barely string a sentence together!"

The girls are silent for a moment. Then they all burst out laughing.

"Oh my god," Marlene says, wiping tears from her eyes. "I can't believe it. Sirius Black, with his infamous sharp tongue, who always has a retort for everything and can make even the most ruthless corporate lawyer tremble with fear, finally at a loss for words, because of a cute guy!" She laughs again. "I'm never going to let him hear the end of this, I swear!"

"As any good friend should," Mary says approvingly.

Remus looks puzzled.

"Come on, Remus," Lily grins. "With your experience from today, I think it's pretty clear why Sirius’ brain turns to mush around you!"

"So," Remus says slowly. "Black is actually both very intelligent and very into me?"

"He sure is."

Remus sits back on his chair and takes a sip of his coffee. "Interesting."

Remus is hiding in a corner. Not how he usually acts at parties, but he's got a very good reason. Two very good reasons actually.

First, it's so that he won't continuously get hit on, with people making flirtatious comments, bringing him drinks or making not-so-subtle suggestions of what they could do after the party now that they're no longer co-workers.

Second, it's so he can observe Sirius Black without Sirius Black knowing he's observing him.

Because Remus is intrigued.

Sure, he did find Black attractive. No one who sees him can deny that he's a good-looking man. But Remus never considered him as someone he'd potentially want to date.

Remus likes intelligent men. Maybe that's pretentious, but it's just how it is. He's attracted to men whom he can have stimulating conversations with, who challenge him and keep him on his toes, who he can share ideas with. Black seemed to be none of those things, so Remus had never looked at him like that.

Tonight, though, Remus is looking.

Black is, of course, the star of the evening. The whole party is to celebrate his achievement, after all. He looks stunning in his dress shirt and his long hair tied up. Everybody wants to talk to the man of the moment, and Black is making rounds, going from group to group, smiling brightly and making easy conversation with everyone. He looks confident and at ease, oozing charisma and competence.

Remus hadn't felt any particular way about the fidgety Sirius Black stumbling over his words, but this Sirius Black… This is a Sirius Black he would like to see more of. There's just something incredibly sexy about a confident man who knows what he's doing, and knows he's doing it well.

Black is currently chatting to the Bones-siblings– Amelia and Edgar are from the prestigious Bones family, known for their philanthropy and welfare work, and both are highly educated and strongly dedicated–, and Peter Petttigrew and Emmeline Vance. Vance is a tall, blond woman, who works for a pharmaceutical company and with whom they once had to negotiate a settlement with. Peter was quite infatuated with her, and keeps inviting her to these types of events, hoping to get with her, though everyone can see Vance has no real interest in him besides his connections.

Remus doesn't know whether Vance likes to play devil's advocate, or whether she's really defending her beliefs, but she's always taking opposing stances and arguing with everyone from the firm. Remus supposes she thinks having a different opinion makes her special and interesting, by showing she's not like the rest of them naive ideologists, but Remus disagrees. Sometimes, having a different opinion just makes you wrong.

Vance brushes her long, blond hair back. "You drive a motorcycle, right?" She asks Black. "Which means you need fuel. You can attack Exxon, but at the same time, you're one of the consumers creating the demand they're providing." She crosses her arms over her chest, looking quite smug.

Black arches an eyebrow. "I try to make the world a better place, whilst not being perfect myself, yes."

"Well, doesn't that make you…"

"A hypocrite?" Black finishes.

Vance shrugs.

"No one can do everything right. If trying to do good while you know you will sometimes get it wrong makes you a hypocrite, then not even trying to do any good only because you know you can't do everything makes you a cynic." Black crosses his arms over his chest and looks Vance in the eyes. "And then I'd rather be a hypocrite than a cynic."

"And you think bringing a company to the verge of bankruptcy with such an erratic fine is 'doing good'?" Vance asks. "If you take speeding, for instance, people don't speed because they know what fine they'll have to pay when they do. The fine Exxon has been given, however, is unprecedented. Therefore, Exxon couldn't have taken it into account when deciding upon their actions. Therefore, it is unfair." She looks quite pleased with herself.

Black does not look impressed with her argumentation, though. "We fine Exxon because we want them to not pour a gallon of crude oil over a baby seal," he says. "Not because we want to enable them to conduct a detailed cost-benefit-analysis on the strategy of pouring a gallon of crude oil over a baby seal! If they don't like that the consequences are unpredictable, good. It's a punishment, they're supposed to not like it."

"But you can't let such a vital company face the threat of bankruptcy!" Vance persists, clearly trying to get under Black's skin.

Black shrugs. "You're the one who started drawing parallels with criminal law. Alright, but then let's be consistent. What's the highest price someone can pay for the worst crime? It's their actual life. Now, Exxon has destroyed ecosystems, destroyed the lives of hundreds of people, and killed countless wildlife. It doesn't get much worse than that, so what would be the corporate equivalent of having to pay with your life? Bankruptcy indeed, if you follow your own logic."

"But do you really think Exxon is going to pay up?" Edgar Bones asks carefully. "I mean, Exxon has got an whole army of the best lawyers at their disposal. They can keep appealing the verdict to a higher and higher court, and keep stalling the process. The plaintiffs will be broke and forced to give up any further legal proceedings before they ever see a dime."

"If Exxon wants to drag this process out for years," Black replies instantly. "Then I will be breathing down their neck every single day for as long as it lasts and make sure they won't get a moment of rest from this case until they pay up! If we let them get away with this, simply because they have more means, it'll send a message to all companies like them that they can do whatever they want and no one will hold them accountable."

"But they won't be able to afford your services anymore."

"I don't want any money, not until the plaintiffs have been paid what they are due," Black says passionately, balling his fists.

"I suppose it's good exposure for your brand," Vance contemplates. "Being the activist lawyer engaged in a legal battle with Exxon."

Black gives her a hard look. "Some things aren't about money, or exposure. Some things just matter."

Remus stares at Black. That unwavering conviction, that fierce determination… It does something to him. Seeing that burning passion in his eyes, it makes something stir in Remus' stomach.

Remus chugs the rest of his his wine and places the empty glass on a passing waitress' tray, before making his way over to the group.

"Professor Lupin!" Vance says, batting her eyelashes at him. "Always good to see you."

"Hi Remus," Edgar Bones says warmly, giving Remus a quick once-over. "Glad you decided to come tonight."

"Yes, hi," Remus says, without taking his eyes off of Black, whose mouth is opening and closing like a fish without any words coming out. "Could I steal the man of the moment for a bit?" He asks, winking at Black. "To congratulate him on his big win."

Vance looks from Remus to Black and back. "Figures," she mumbles, before brushing her blond hair back and stalking off.

"Oh, I was hoping…" Edgar Bones begins.

"Of course, Remus," Amelia Bones interrupts, grabbing her brother's arm and dragging him away. "Come on, Ed. Let them have a moment."

"I hope I wasn't interrupting anything important?" Remus asks sweetly, smiling at Black.

Black's face flushes. "No! No, nothing important! Just talking about… how you should be a hypocrite, and how you can calculate the benefits of pouring oil on a baby seal, and how my clients will go bankrupt paying me…"

Remus arches an eyebrow.

Black cringes at himself, and covers his eyes with his hand, groaning. "Oh god, I swear… I swear, I'm actually smart!" He says. "I have more than two brain cells! I swear I do! The rest just somehow… switches off when it comes to you."

Remus throws his head back and lets out a genuine laugh. "Well, I guess it's good then that I'm not some corporate lawyer on the other side of the courtroom," he teases.

"It wouldn't have mattered then," Black mutters, crossing his arms over his chest.

Remus frowns. "How so?"

"I like how dedicated you are to your research," Black explains. "It's not just a job to you, you actually care. The way you talk about an exciting new research idea," a spark appears in Black's eyes as he talks. "With that contagious excitement, and always so hopeful, no matter how bad the world can be, that we can make it better. There's a fire and a passion to you." Black seems to realize he's been rambling, and he shrugs awkwardly. "I hardly would've been impressed to the point of my brain shutting down if you had been using that fire and passion to defend some bank's right to invest their client's money in cutting down the rainforest."

Remus stares at him.

He was not expecting this. His face feels warm, and- God, is he blushing? He can't remember the last time he blushed!

He thought Sirius liked him because he's handsome and successful. Many people do. But Sirius has seen him, and likes him for the kind of person he is. Remus feels something stir again, but this time not in his stomach, but higher, in the chest-area.

He gives Sirius a warm smile. "Thank you," he says sincerely, and then he laughs. "What can I say? Some things just matter."

Sirius just looks at him for a moment, before snapping out of it. "Oh, it's nothing." He wants to make a dismissive gesture with his hand, but he has forgotten he's holding a glass of red wine, and ends up throwing it all over his shirt. "Shite!" He curses, wiping his hands over his shirt, only making it worse. "Dammit, dammit! God, I'm such a bloody pillock!"

Remus looks on with a fond smile. Yes, it's going to take a lot of effort to bring out that confident, competent Sirius Black around him, but Remus has the feeling that it's going to be worth it.

[omegasmileyface]

YIPPEE I FINISHED MY FIRST SONG!!! its not perfect but it is in fact a song!!! :DDDDDD

this is my art for @ecto-implosion 2023! thats a Danny Phantom reverse big bang, which means it was an event where artists would work on an art piece, a fanfiction author would partner up with them and make a fic based off of it, and then everyone would release everything in a short time period— this song is intended to be listenable even if you don't know anything about the show, but it is a fansong from the perspective of Penelope Spectra singing to/about Vlad Masters :3

my partner was @nanaarchy, who made THIS KICK-ASS COMPANION FIC PLEASE READ IT THERES SO MUCH ATTENTION TO DETAIL OH MY GOD!!

and thank you @krzysztofpikes for being a HUUUUUUUGE help with the software and the chords and the mixing and overall just helping me do this thing that i had no idea how to do whatsoever

if you'd like to download the song, you can do that here (srry i didnt upload it to spotify or bandcamp or anything lol), and here's the youtube upload! also, the lyrics are below the cut!

Do you feel that desperation hiding underneath your skin? Do you feel the way that loneliness burns? Do you recognize your actions always stemmed from within? Have you figured out to live and to learn? Do you still fear the sight of needles and the beeping of machines? Still assume people pawns by default? Do you smell that sweet ambrosia hiding underneath your skin? Well, the good thing is it's all your fault The first part of healing is admitting that you're sick and I can almost taste it in the way you move your lips You haven't thought of therapy since when you were a kid That changes now! While I'm here, congratulations on the magazines and house every girl in town lined up but one And what a beautiful blue bedroom, such a shame it's untouched I would bet you'd raise the perfect son Everything somebody could want unless that somebody was you Here you are, still haunted after dawn I bet even if I put him right in front of you, you couldn't rid the world of that pollution show your old friend absolution I'm sure you've noticed by now trauma gave you your start You wouldn't be here if you'd never gotten torn apart Go tell your enemies you're thankful that your heart was eaten by the Green-Eyed Monster! The first part of healing is admitting that you're sick and I can almost taste it in the way you move your lips You haven't thought of therapy since when you were a kid Let me just go ahead and change that now... The first part of grieving is admitting that you're dead so move yourself on over, wrap my teeth around your neck You hadn't thought of therapy 'til I got in your head That's my world now! All these lectures about power... and when were you going to use it? Hmm. That's what I thought.

[robertreich]

Republicans Don’t Own Patriotism

Republicans claim they love America.

But they sure don’t seem to like the American people.

They consistently oppose reforms that a majority of Americans believe would make their lives better, like raising the minimum wage, paid family leave, and student debt relief.

And these supposedly America-loving Republicans also seem to hate American cities, which is where 80% of Americans live.

So they must love rural America, right?

Ehhh…not so much.

Republicans have historically tried to block Medicaid expansion and cut its funding, which rural Americans have especially benefited from. They’ve sought to slash funding for rural infrastructure and development. They’ve sided with big ag over independent farmers. And they’re continually trying to cut food stamps, which rural Americans depend on — even more than those in cities.

So maybe it’s the land itself they love.

Except that while in office, Donald Trump rolled back more than a hundred environmental regulations, making it easier to pollute America’s air, water, and land.

And he opened about two million acres of federally protected (and culturally significant) land to oil drilling.

Rather than conserving our land, they seem more interested in conserving Big Oil profits.

And sadly, Republicans are increasingly rejecting America’s core principles. They’re attacking freedom of speech with book bans. They’re attacking freedom of assembly with laws restricting protests. And they’re rejecting the separation of church and state.

Republicans are even shunning democracy itself, denying election results, passing laws that make it harder to vote, and kicking out legitimately elected lawmakers they disagree with.

It’s time to stop letting Republicans claim the mantle of patriotism without actually being patriots.

Patriotism means loving freedom: the freedom to make your own health care choices, the freedom to choose who and how you love, freedom of speech, freedom of assembly, freedom to unionize.

Patriotism also means wanting Americans to be free from the fear of gun violence and free from crushing student debt.

Above all, patriotism involves strengthening our democracy. True patriots don’t put loyalty to their political party above their love of America. True patriots don’t support an attempted coup.

Now is the time for the rest of us to reclaim patriotism and affirm its true meaning.

[emilybeemartin]

Inktober Days 22-24

Day 22: "Scratchy"

Saguaro, cholla, prickly pear, pincushion, hedgehog, barrel cactus—how magical are these amazing plants? Iconic, unique, perfectly tuned to their environment. The pleats on a saguaro help it bulge and shrink to accommodate water availability, and the inhospitable trunks provide shelter for desert birds. 

Saguaro NP produces some of my favorite educational videos in the system, thanks in part to Feature Fridays with Ranger Freddy Gutiérrez Fernández-Ramírez. Just to add to the scritchy-scratchy theme of this prompt, some of the more unusual videos featuring Ranger Freddy show how to remove jumping cholla barbs from your skin and clothes. Rangers in Saguaro carry hair combs in their first aid kits—and it’s not to fix flat-hat hair!

Day 23: "Celestial"

In recent decades, park managers have come to recognize natural soundscapes and pristine night skies as tangible resources, just like clean air, land, and water. As I was entering the NPS field, a big effort was kicking off to designate certain units as Dark Sky parks, and Big Bend is the king of them all. It has the lowest levels of light pollution of any park in the lower 48 and is famous across the NPS for its breathtaking starscapes.

Protecting natural darkness opens up amazing new opportunities for visitors and rangers. I love assisting with night sky programs, because I remember how I felt when I first traveled away from the greater I-85 corridor and saw my first pristine night sky. It’s a primordial type of magic to see stars unveiled from urban lights and humid haze. And the good news is, unlike other endangered resources, dark skies are salvageable. When towns and cities take steps to reduce their light and air pollution, there’s no slow, agonizing recovery—the stars come right back. They’re just up there, waiting to peek at us again.

Day 24: "Shallow"

I have to confess—I used to look down on Congaree, despite it being the only national park in my home state of South Carolina. I thought of it as muggy, buggy, and a bit boring. But when I was researching wetland habitat for A Field Guide to Mermaids, I was stunned to realize just how special this landscape is. Our country used to be covered in immense floodplain forests along river corridors, but the natural flood cycles that made these lowlands so fertile also meant the land was prized for agriculture. Rivers were straightened, forests were cut down, and the rich soil was planted with crops. Because of this, Congaree protects the largest swathe of bottomland floodplain forest left in the United States.

And it’s a gorgeous park, as well. There’s something evocative and eerie about walking the elevated boardwalks over tea-colored water. Spooky cypress knees reach up through the water like outstretched arms, and several massive national and state champion trees loom up out of the thick forest.

This park may not have the accolades some of the grander, more storied parks have, but I’m proud that it’s my home state’s park and glad that it protects one of the last intact forests of its kind.

------

Another big thank you to the folks who have preordered Thirty-One Days of National Parks: The Artbook! The Big Bend page features a little guide to starhopping from the Big Dipper out to other stars!

[zeroeightzeroone]

the highs and lows - han jisung

genre: hurt/comfort, platonic soulmates

characters: bestfriend!hanjisung and fem!reader

warnings: recreational use of cannabis

wc ~1.8k | moodboard

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ ｡ ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:

leaning your head against the balcony doors, you bring your knees up to your chest as a deep breath expels from your lips. beside you, jisung–your best friend–is seated with his legs splayed out in front of him, the both of you gazing off into the distance. everything around looks tiny due to jisung living on a higher floor. you hear the boy inhale deeply before holding his breath for a moment, his whole body relaxing as his lips part and release the smoke. lazily, his head rolls towards you as he hands over the blunt hanging between his two fingers.

this time, you're the one placing the end between your lips to take a drag, holding the smoke in your lungs. whilst you're preoccupied, jisung takes his opportunity to speak.

"so, what's wrong?"

your lips part, puffing the smoke out into the air. without looking in his direction, you hand the blunt over.

"nothing," you cough, "why would something be wrong?"

he takes another hit before speaking, "c'mon. it's me you're talking to you."

you turn to look at him, starting to feel the high kick in slowly. when his equally as hooded eyes lock with yours, you click your tongue, diverting your eyes back to the blunt; silently telling jisung to hand it over.

"you say you're coming over, out of nowhere at nearly one in the morning. no context. now here you are, it's—" he checks his phone, "almost two in the morning and we're getting high."

you exhale, "yes and? i can't spontaneously come to see my best friend and get high?"

"haha," he deadpans.

jisung rolls his eyes, facing forward with a gentle grin as he takes another hit of the blunt between his fingers. you listen to him huff, watching the puff of smoke dissipate in the air and eventually disappearing into the atmosphere.

"but y'know, if there is something wrong. i'm all ears. ready when you are."

from the corner of his eyes, jisung sees you nod slowly instead of verbally acknowledging his words. the air between you two falls quiet but it's a comfortable silence, you feel at ease. sure, the weed helps with the latter but jisung's your best friend, the person you feel the most comfortable and relaxed around. if you were asked to name someone you trust more than the dark-haired boy sitting next to you, you probably wouldn't be able to form an answer.

your eyes move from the sea of buildings and to the sky where you gaze up at the moon and stars. your heavy, hooded eyes lingering on the handful of stars you're able to see shining above through the light pollution of the city. no words are exchanged between you and jisung, just the blunt. every couple of minutes you're taking turns hitting the spliff, feeling your body relax as the euphoria takes over. despite the weight you held in your heart earlier, you're starting to feel weightless.

"i'm fully convinced that i'm going to end up alone."

the boy beside you blinks slowly, processing your words before asking, "why's that?"

taking another drag before passing it over, you shrug as you let your arms hang over your knees.

"i mean… my first relationship lasted like–what? almost four years and he was toxic as hell. here i am, years later and i'm still going through the trauma."

jisung hums in response.

"then the second one," you pause to chuckle at yourself foolishly, "god… i thought he was gonna be the last."

you purse your lips together with a sigh.

"i thought he was my soulmate–as stupid and cheesy as that sounds. i put so much of myself into both of those relationships and they just… failed."

you exhale a big smoke cloud.

"isn't that stupid? thinking he was my soulmate or some shit. just 'cos every year he–somehow–crawled back into my life. now two years have passed since we broke up, two years where he hasn't popped up again."

jisung takes another hit, listening to everything you're saying and allowing you to let it all out.

"then all our friends are in relationships, most of them starting off dating apps and now they've been together for years," you say with a slightly aggravated tone, "i've tried those apps too and nothing! here i am, alone."

you click your tongue again as you gather your thoughts.

"what if that's my fate? to be alone? what if my past relationships have fucked me up so bad that i never find love again? what if there's no one out there for me?"

this time when you puff out the smoke, your breath comes out shaky.

"don't think like that," jisung finally says.

"it's hard not to, after everything."

"i get that," the smoke leaves his lips as he speaks, "but i believe that there's a person out there for you, maybe you've already met them or you have yet to cross paths."

you throw your head back in exaggeration, hands clasped together as you plead, "please universe. make whoever this is–the one who's meant for me–known."

jisung shakes his head with a lazy chuckle, passing you the joint when you unclasp your hands.

"if only it was that easy."

pursing your lips together in a sad pout, you respond with a nod before placing the mouthpiece between your lips and breathing in.

"you might not believe it right now. but one day, that person will make themselves known. the amount of love and devotion you gave your exes, your person will give it back to you–tenfold."

you hum, "that'd be nice."

"when they come around, they'll hold onto you so tight and do everything in their power not to lose you," a lazy smirk adorns your lips at the thought, "knowing you, you'll ask them–where have you been all my life?–but at the same time, you'll look back on your life thus far and feel happy that you've made it this far."

"if only i could fast forward to that point."

"you and me both," jisung blinks slowly, eyes heavy and slightly bloodshot, "hey. don't let those losers convince you that you won't find someone. they're not worth a two a.m. existential crisis."

you sigh, "i know. but they're still losers i dated, and spent a substantial amount of time with. ugh."

"mistakes. you live and you learn, one day i'll be the right choice."

"y'know," you cough lightly, "even though i'm saying all this about being alone, i don't think im ready to jump into another relationship… i'm scared."

your best friend bops his head up and down slowly, "scared?"

jisung decides it's time to put the blunt out when the hit he takes burns a bit more than usual.

"scared of getting hurt," you watch as he puts out the joint, blowing on it to make sure it's completely extinguished, "especially like– getting hurt over someone who wasn't worth all that time and effort? y'know?"

"i mean… i think that you've been through enough shit to know when to get the hell out," jisung tells you as he turns his whole body to face yours, no longer worrying about blowing smoke in your face, "and i think being scared could be a good thing?"

you narrow your eyes at him, "how so?"

"it means you'll be careful. you'll be careful with who you choose to put that time and effort into. you'll use your experience to weed out the assholes that don't deserve you."

"do i really have that wisdom?"

he shrugs, "a slippery slope there."

you feign offence, smacking jisung with the back of your hand prompting an exaggerated expression of pain from him. despite the subject of conversation being a bit heavy, your whole body feels weightless as you burst into a fit of giggles that rubs off onto jisung. moments later, you're both gripping your aching stomachs, trying your hardest to come down from your laughing fit with any semblance of sober control you can grasp.

jisung comes to before you're able to, sighing in exhaustion before speaking, "i'm always gonna be here, y'know?"

you flash jisung a lopsided, toothy smile, "i know."

"so even if you can't see it, i will. i'll be the one to tell your stubborn ass that whoever you're seeing–ain't shit."

jisung reaches over, taking your hand in his and gently caressing the skin with the pad of his thumb; a comforting gesture he's done since the beginning of your friendship. you feel your body relax, slouching as you lean your head on the door.

"i saw somewhere that you can have multiple soulmates."

your ears perk up at the sudden information, and the newfound curiosity on your face prompts jisung to continue.

"yeah. it's not just a romantic soulmate. a platonic one too."

you nod, your lips parted in awe.

"they say it's like your souls are bound together, you just get each other. you meet them and it's like you've known each other your entire lives."

he continues, there's a sparkle in his glossy, bloodshot eyes.

"i'd like to think that, that feeling of connection already there comes from knowing each other from past lives. y'know what that means?"

you narrow your eyes at him playfully, "what? that you're my platonic soulmate?"

jisung flashes you a thumbs-up with his free hand.

"yes and, that no matter how fucking annoyed we get with each other. it's just inescapable, our souls are bound together to be each other's annoying ass best friends in each life."

he places his free hand on his heart as if he's making a pledge.

"for i, han jisung, am your kindred soul in a best friend," he announces, "you'll never be alone. not on my watch."

"and for i, y/n y/l/n, as your kindred soul in a best friend," you place your own freehand on your heart, "promise to annoy the absolute shit out of you in this life, and the next."

he leans over and flicks your forehead, inflicting a little yelp from you.

"and i'll be there in each life, knocking some sense into your stubborn ass. who better to help you weed out losers that don't deserve you than your best-fated friend forever?"

you gag exaggeratedly at his new self-assigned best friend tag, "who better than a loser himself."

he goes to flick your forehead again but you squeal and try to evade the incoming attack. jisung retreats his attack, looking at you with a playful glare.

"but, i wouldn't have it any other way."

"what do you say now?"

your eyebrows knit together in confusion, "what? thank you?"

"and?"

he uses his free hand to gesture for you to continue, which does absolutely nothing for your confusion. with a defeated sigh, he shakes his head before filling the blanks in for you.

"and i love you."

you dart your head back, giving your best friend a side-eye. your whole body cringing with disgust, you clear your throat, "thank you. i… love you too?… i guess?"

jisung rolls his eyes at you and purses his lips together in a pronounced pout.

"i'm kidding, i'm kidding. i love you too, my best-fated friend forever."

main masterlist

[incrediblyshyghost]

FNAF: fairy AU fanfic of @ayyy-imma-ninja fairy Eclipse 

Sick oc, death of a hawk, mention of blood and cuts, some cursing, fairy Eclipse is NOT my character, hurt fairy. Eclipse had used this older farmhouse to keep out of the rain a few days ago, it seemed to be while kept and redone but no one seemed to be living here, the temptation to burn it down was squished when he found a way in and fell on a weird rectangle plastic box with buttons this made the bigger magic box turned on showing all different animals with facts about them he found himself sitting on the soft couch watching the magic box till the storm had passed and he didn't want to leave after that. But a few days ago, 5 humans came and ruined his fun cleaning up the place and seemed to be moving boxes in, they left soon after so he left looking for food for a while coming back only to find there are new humans there again. Eclipse noticed watching from an oak tree grumbling about not being able to watch the magic box. 

Are you sure you want to be alone? Her mother asked as they finished setting up the old house for her to stay for a while.

Yeah, I need time for myself to think alone about this and it’s not like it’s forever, and I have the sheriff's number on speed dial if anything happens, and the air here is better than the city-smoked fill poison that has been polluting my lungs lately. 

I know I know I just love you ok and you better call me every day! She shouts, hugging her daughter tight enough for her to feel her bones creak. 

Ok. Love you too Mom she said patting her mother back trying to keep a brave face as she stood in the driveway watching the red car pull away down the rocky drive. 

The loving moment made Eclipse's stomach turn but he was intrigued by the car humans had come a long way with their toys. Watching the big red machine kick up dust. Only for his eyes to catch the human that was left behind, she had freckles like someone he knew but her deep green eyes were different... He waked as the girl waved till the car was out of sight and took a shaky deep breath. How odd for some reason, Eclipse found himself following the girl as she walked into the forest. It seemed the more she walked the shakier she got tell she got to the small creek she fell to her knees, her arms wrapped around her side hugging herself tightly as she bowed her head, short brown hair getting pulled in the slight current the creek had, and screamed she screamed so loud like a wounded animal a dyeing animal something he had never heard come out of a human as she sat in the rocky, grass filled edge of the creek tears running down her nose making ripples in the water. Till her voice seems to go out her back shakes as she sodded alone in the forest. 

Eclipse was struggling to just leave her, that scream reminded him of his own. He had followed her to give her a scare, maybe get her to leave the house so he could watch the magic box! but now he didn't know what to do, his wing fluttered as he decided to just leave, but a shriek of a hawk and the sound of its wings right behind him changed his plains before he could even turn sharp claw wrapped around his chest and wings, squeezing him as he feels his wings rips by the sharp talons as the beast wings shoosh around him, he growled his claws swiping at the hawks talons his fire burning the bird he heard the birds shriek of pain ringing in his ears and a felt himself falling with it then nothing… 

The girl looks up from her pity party of one hearing the hawk shriek and thrash in on the ground she gets up slowly walks over gasping holding a hand over her mouth sees the hawk with what looks like burn marks on its chest one side of its face and wing look bend in the wrong direction from its fall,  she had heard about the fire that happened two weeks ago but this looks like it had just happened the bird still smoking. A few leaves on fire around it and just looking at the poor thing there was no way it was going to live, but then she saw something lying on the ground by the dying hawk she picked it up away from the trashing bird's talons and it looked like a fairy? This was a joke, she had asked for a sign not whatever this was! But as she looked at the little odd creature that was bleeding in her hand as the hawk went quiet and still she couldn't just put the little thing down and head home, so she curled her fingers around the warm creature and headed back to the old farmhouse as she dried her tears. 

Rushing into the house and putting the fairy on the marble countertop under the kitchen light she could see the claw mark on the poor thing's middle and rips on its big wings that she had gently made sure she didn't fold when she put him down, and there was blood on the back of its head, she just stared for a moment taking him in, the body was half dark brown like the bark of a tree, the other side orange, almost like a Halloween themed doll, its mouth hung open showing off its sharp teeth it had claws to match raggedy and torn cloak shirt thing over its top half and dark red and orange striped pants that looked ashed covered and slightly burned. All and all the poor thing looked like a bloody mess she moved to her medicine cabinets pulling everything she could get her hand on out and putting it around the unconscious fairy thing. 

Cleaning the wounds was easy with some Q-tips with warm water on them to clean off the blood and gently trying to see if there was anything like dirt inside the wounds was hard to see but her sewing kit magnifying glass came in handy there. Once that was done she put some Neosporin on the wounds. Then whispered cussed out the gauze as she struggled to cut it small enough to tie around the fairy but she managed to wrap the gauze around the fairy's belly and leg from the hawk's apparent attack, it was a little worrying at how limp the poor thing was but it was still breathing. After that she looked at its wings. The edges looked tattered but that could just be how they were there, however, the three cuts from the talons were clean lines through the wings. Digging around her medicines she found new skin liquid bandages and it was worth a shot the stuff was pretty much glue so she gently applied the new skin on the wing being careful to hold the two pieces together and not glue into the table and holding it for a few minutes till it dry and do it again to the other cut on his wings he only ever made a light hissing sound which made her jump out of her skin but he didn't wake. Once all his wounds were taken care of she made him a little bed out of a soft blanket and put the smallest ice pack out of her fridge she could find under it for the head wound. She left him on the table away from anything flammable besides the blanket he was on, since she doubted the bird just burst into flame the odd creature had to be the cause... 

“What a good start to this week instead of unpacking and thinking about what little option you had left you bringing a weird creature into the house that you are pretty sure somehow set a bird on fire smart move” she mumbled to herself opening the windows hoping the thing would wake up and flee out the window, cleaning up the medicine putting it all back in the cabinet, she hoped it was something her mind's made up in her panic of the bad news, but as she glanced over and yep the Halloween themed fairy still there. She sat in the dining room, a spot where she could glance up and see the bundle of blankets and the tips of the fairy's wings. She pulled out her notebook mindlessly sketching and doodling as the time slowly moved forward unable to unpack worried shed wake the thing. The clock ticking seemed to tease her about how long she had left here, so she put on some music to drown out the ticking and temptation to toss the clock outside in the yard. 

She was lost in her sketchbook and music not noticing the movement in the kitchen as the fairy woke up feeling something cool on the back of his head. It felt nice dulling the ache he could feel there. He felt weak, S-sunny? He called softly before he snapped back to reality with a gasp sitting up quickly only to hiss holding his aching side his head throbbing at the sudden movement where was he? He thought his eyes scanning what he could see, a familiar kitchen hearing quiet music and his hand he felt cloth not skin looking down he found a soft white cloth wrapped there and on his leg, his wing ached, and looking at them he saw cuts and some kind of shiny clear something on the cuts holding the torn wing parts together. What happened? He thinks back remembering the girl and then… a bird? Did he really lose to a stupid bird? He growled Looking over he saw the girl, it seemed she calmed down and was doing something with a book away from him he saw the open windows he slowly got up with a hiss holding his head feeling like his brain got scrambled he fluttered his wings and hissing at the ache it caused no flying yet he stumbles over to the edge of the counter and shouted at the human to come over here. 

She almost jumps out of her skin and hears bells suddenly over her music she looks around before spotting the fairy thing standing with its hands over its mouth like it was shouting at her but she only hears bells, she gets up slowly, umm i i can't hear what you're saying you sound like windchimes she said coming over to the table slowly. Then she hears a voice that sounds male and growly “Hey kidnapper can I get some food!” 

She chuckles out of all the things to say, well seems you are doing better she says walking past the island into the kitchen opening the fridge pulling out some strawberries and a piece of cooked chicken pulling off a small piece and getting a medicine cup filling it with water putting it all on a small saucer before putting it on the island for the fairy. Hopefully, you're okay with spice the chicken has some heat to it, she said watching the fairy confidently walk over the saucer and sit down to eat, watching her as she watched him. You look like you have been through hell, fairy? She said the last word as though it was a question he looked up at her nodding 

Got a name? Or are you just going to eat my food after I bandage you up and leave without introducing yourself? She asked 

“You first crybaby he growled” with his mouth full, 

“Crybaby?... Where are you watching me?” She asked but he didn't answer her the petals on his head twitched a little which was odd she sighed not getting an answer from him she shook her head no. “I remember reading somewhere that it's a bad idea to give your name to a fairy first and I help you instead of letting that dying hawk kill you. I think it's the least you could do is tell me your name.”

“Eclipse” he growled glaring at her “Zoe” she all but purred happy to get a name for the odd little fairy. 

Oh what happened to the “bad idea giving your name to a fairy?” eclipse chuckled standing up and dusting himself off after he finished his food. 

“Well I know yours so I think it equals out right?” Zoe asked with a shrug 

“I don't know, is it? I could have lied about my name” Eclipse chuckles with his Cheshire grin 

“So could I.” Zoe said, almost bopping Eclipse's pointed nose but yanking her hand back when he tried to bite “Sorry, it's just your... Cute” 

“Am not!” eclipse shouts little flames circle his balled fist as he huffs glaring at her, her eyes widen but not in fear like Eclipse thought they would but in amazement as she seems to looking him over again. 

“So you are the reason the hawk was bbq?” she asked her hand coming closer but a sharp glare and a show of teeth got her to stop moving closer “sorry sorry,” she said leaning back so you are a fire fairy? 

Eclipse or black sun fairy take your pick of a name eclipse huffed crossing his arms and glaring up at her 

“You don't like humans do you?” Zoe asked 

“What do you think?” he growled his wing fluttered and he hid a wince 

“You're the one that called me over” she shrugged “If it makes you feel better I won't be here long, so don't start liking me little firecracker.” she giggled, patting the side of his face gently with a finger pulling back quickly before he could snap at her. She backs away from the table as he shouts about how he will kill her as he stoops his foot. Little sparks of fire flicker from his hands him “So angry that's not how you talk to people eclipse.”  she said leaving the island and going back to her sketchbook on the dining table letting him throw a tantrum on the marble table where he couldn't light anything but the blanket on fire, and it seems as soon as she thought that she smells fire and see the blanket has a small flickering flame on its corner and the fairy grinning at her as she rushes over smoothing the small start of a fire with the rest of the blanket really? Really? You had to burn the blanket, not a ‘Please can you come back? No straight to arson with you? She asked, she didn't shout or freak out, just made sure the fire wasn't going to start again before looking at the fairy standing by the blanket looking confused. 

“I didn't think about that” he huffed crossing his arms 

“Course, so you got me to come over. What do you want, little fairy?” Zoe asked as she stood there, Eclipse huffed and grumbled kicking at the smooth marble table with his bare feet before looking up at her. Can you take me to the magic box that talks about wildlife? Eclipse asked 

She stares at him for a moment thinking magic box magic box…., you mean a TV? She asked holding her hand out for Eclipse to jump onto, he stared at her seeming to be shocked that she would trust him not the burn her after he just lit the blanket of fire, he slowly climbed on and sat on her palm and she carefully took him over to the living room rested her hand on the coffee table for him to get off turned on the TV and found the Animal channel, “I would let you on the couch but I don't trust you not to burn it know that you have set that poor blanket on fire.” 

“What? But I did that because you wouldn't come! I won't burn the couch” eclipse huffed 

“No, you have not earned enough trust to be allowed on the coucaaaieh” she yelped as he bit her finger she as gently as she could dumped the fairy out of her hand and pulled her hand up but Eclipse stubbornly held on like a dog with a rope toy ok let gooooo! Zoe said her other hand coming up gently running her finger down his back making him let go and she quickly pulled her hands back away from the fairy leaving him stuck on the coffee table for the moment since his wing still hurt too much to fly. How do you think biting would change my mind? She asked shocked that he bit her not that it really hurt but he had bitten down hard enough to draw blood.

“Just die!” eclipse growled turning away from her to watch the TV but she noticed that his red cheek seemed to be an even darker color. Maybe he's embarrassed? There was a documentary about snow leopards, and the soothing voice of the narrator filled the awkward silence. 

“Working on it, I still need to find a pretty urn first.” she huffed taking the paperwork that was beside the fairy before he could get any ideas. Did the petals around his head just move? She watched him slowly turn around 

What? He asked looking back at her, what? She asked with a shrug her eyes scanning over the paperwork in her hands  holding her index finger out to not get blood on the paper too lazy to go get a bandaid right now eclipse growled looking back at the TV 

“Awww does the little fairy care about me?” she giggles knowing she was pushing his buttons she watched little flames flicker and die in his hand as he breathed deeply 

“No, I don't like humans, remember? What are those papers for?” eclipse asked seeing some big words that he had no idea the meaning of on that paper as she flipped through the bundle 

“This is either the nail in the coffin or a miracle, I just don't know if I want to fight anymore. I am tired of this long battle…” she said which just confused Eclipse more 

“What do you mean?” 

“I’ll spill my secrets as soon as you do.” at this eclipse turns back to the TV “nevermind”  and they calmly watch the documentary about snow leopards in silence telling zoe leans closer to the table her finger gently rubbing the back of eclipse head your head ok? It seems like you hit in when you fell, you want an ice pack she asked as he froze up for a few seconds before he swiped his claws at her finger. Making her pull her hand away as he got up, moving away from her and telling her not to touch, she took it as progress since he didn't try to bite her this time, and she didn't feel a bump on his head so that was a good sign. As the TV switch to a show about sea turtles she noticed Eclipse's head bopping she giggled slowly getting up and walking back into the kitchen getting the slightly burned blanket and coming back without saying anything she just gently warping the blanket around him before laying back down on the couch looking at the tv like she didnt do anything as eclipse looked over at her before snuggling into the blanket. she watches him out of the corner of her eyes as he slowly nods off, she notices that his wings disappeared, must be a fairy magic thing she thought. Once she is sure he is asleep she sighs seeing how he is lying, and gently moves him to lay more comfortably lowering the volume on the tv she yawns and stretches heading to her bed leaving the fairy on the coffee table trusting him and the fire alarms to not let the house burn down.

Wake up to the birds chirp and not the blaring scream of the fire alarms was a good sign as Zoe got up and ready for the day almost hoping to walk into the living room and find it empty and the fairy just be a dream, but as she walks down the hallway she hears him mumbling in his sleep, as she got closer she saw him curl up a look of pain on his face as he mumbled she went to the kitchen not stupid enough to try and wake him by touching him, coming back with a wooden spoon in hand hearing him mumbled “moon, sunny” before she gently started talking to him and gently poked him with the wooden spoon and was glad it wasn't her fingers as he jumps up with some fire swirls around him as he growled his claw digging into the wooded handle as he started at her with red eyes if looks could kill ‘sorry i you seemed like you were having a nightmare’ she watched his huffed his eyes slowly changing color back to orange “a bad nightmare want to talk about it?” 

“No” 

“Cool breakfast?” she asked bringing her hand closer to him, surprised then both when he climbed on. her thumb gently rubbing his back as she walked she smiled feeling him lean closer for a moment almost relaxed then tensed up and leaned away with a growl she didn't acknowledge that anything that happened but stopped not wanting to push her luck. Just gently put him down and started cooking. Only to see Eclipse on his tip toes trying to see what she was doing. If you promise not to bite me or set me on fire you can sit on my shoulder while I cook eclipse. She said not turning to face him

…. 

She almost thought he was going to walk away or try and fly down to the floor but then she heard the smallest sound of him saying ok. She was amazed by how warm he was as he sat on her shoulder, legs crossed, one hand holding her shoulder, the other a piece of her short hair, “you smell like a campfire.” she said as she finished cooking

“Is that a bad thing?” Eclipse asked she could hear the smile in his voice as she put him down and made their plate omelets seem like a good breakfast she thought as she gave Eclipse his share on a small saucer

“No, but the ashes and soot that you are tracking around is a problem so you need new clothes and a bath or should I start calling you a soot fairy? This earned a loud groaning complete with his tongue sticking out and head tilting back making Zoe giggle which in turn made Eclipse mad as he shouted about what was so funny. His claws failed to scratch the smooth marble island

She giggled oh nothing just eat before your omelet gets cold she said with a smile the paperwork from last night sitting in an envelope signed and ready to be mailed she was giving this last change a shot because the sign she asked for seemed to appear right when she needed him even if he was a feral little thing…

(Bonus/the stupid idea that popped into my head that made my dyslexic brain spiral down into making a whole character and background story of how Eclipses met her. This is after eclipse and Zoe have been ‘friends’ for a little while and something happens that makes his brothers and the gardener meet Zoe because of course eclipse knows where his older brothers are and has been keeping track of them. I hope I got eclipse personality right and you had fun reading and it's not a bunch of gibberish lol) 

Around the table is tarped up, and there is a garden hose running from one of the windows to the table. The Gardner shakingly holding the hose watching eclipses, Zoe sitting at the table looking relaxed with one of those metal flat cookie baking sheets in one hand and an oven glove with fingers on just in case a fight broke out, to hopefully lessen the burns and bite marks if she had to grab eclipse off one of his brothers, though moon had doubts this humans could move fast enough to stop any of them. They had decided to try and talk this all out with the human's help. Inside so no one could fly off or just attack and run as the house was close up and all of the fairies were standing at the table. Sunny had been the one to come up with the water hose idea worried about the house getting damaged. Eclipse moves away from Zoe about to start talking, already moving his arms around a little as he walks closer to the Moon, Sun, and Lunar. The Gardner panics squeezing the handle of the hose only to get sprayed in the face as Zoe had blocked the water with the baking sheet making the water go everywhere but the table her hand moves blocking Eclipse's path as she looks over at the Gardner that had fallen out of their chair in their panic and smacks then on the head with the pan “you want an early grave dumbass?” 

“Language! It's not nice to hit people!” Sunny shouts from behind the moon 

“It's not nice to try and spray people with water either, it was like they were trying to piss off Eclipse right off the bat.” Zoe huffed, rolling her eyes she barely tapped them. They were fine. 

“Language!” 

“Oh dammit, this is going to be harder than I thought.” Zoe huffed rubbing her head already feeling like she going to get a headache as the gardner picked themself up of the floor know wet and thoroughly embarrassed 

“Language!” 

“...dammit a bad word?” Zoe asked confused. angry sunny noises, eclipse cackling and the Gardner is stumbling through an apology.