#kell maresh i would do anything for you

[antaripirate]

maxim maresh core

[purplebass]

Kell the sea warrior: Kay the privateer

I was thinking about Kay Maresh, Kell's privateer identity that he took on after a few years of physical training on the Grey Barron. I wanted to see if the name was another spelling of the name Kai, and it turns out that it is. Depending on the roots, this name means "sea/ocean" or "shell" or even "warrior" and "to rejoice". All these meanings fit Kell's new identity on the ship, out to sea. And the name was chosen deliberately to represent all of his nuances as a character in this new journey. When he's Kay, he conceals his face with a mask, has a new costume and spelled blades, and he is a warrior who uses his body to fight and he also learnt how to be swift and quiet when he moves. Like a ninja or a thief.

Something switches in Kell when he decides to become Kay. He finds hope and confidence in himself for the first time in years after his magic was broken. He understands that if he puts his mind to it and if he believes in himself, he can be anything he wants to be. We see that he still longs for his magic even as Kay, and how he wavers because he is a human being and therefore he's not perfect. Kay was a way to cope with loss and build strength, both physical and mental. Kay was the light at the end of the tunnel. After his magic is fixed, it feels like Kay has served his purpose because Kell the magician his whole again. But Kell decides to still "perform" Kay's identity when he's in private with Lila, because she loves this part of him as well. And Kay is part of Kell by now, another side of himself he didn't know before he got on Lila's ship. After all, the reason Kell took on the Kay identity on the ship was because and thanks to her. Lila couldn't watch him self-sabotage anymore, and she gave him a pep talk which can be summed up in: do you want to keep sinking or do you want to learn how to swim? She knew Kell could very well swim, if only he let someone help him see how there is still much to his life than his magic. His magic didn't define him. And he decided to trust Lila for once.

Kay first appears after a few years of trying to swim and try to keep himself afloat. Lila was the main prompter of Kell's journey to freedom, to Kay himself, so it was only right that he would first show Kay to her. She was his final boss.

Beating her at something she excelled at was a big confidence booster for him, but getting her seal of approval with his new disguise? Lila being proud of him for both? That didn't just boost his confidence, but also his ego, and made his heart lighter. This man is so head over heels for her and I can't imagine how he was excited like a little kid when she was so happy that he had decided to trust himself and his abilities and to envision a new path for himself amid his hopelessness.

Lila was so proud of Kell and also turned on by Kay, because it was the first time in years she had also seen that Kell was finally getting better compared to when they first started their journey together.

The circle opened when he shows Kay to her for the first time and closes after his magic his fixed, after Kay has served his purpose in the story. Both of these moments lead to an intimate situation where Lila wants to see what Kay can do. I think that the intimate response is her way to practically show Kell how much she loves and appreciates him and how happy she is for him. It's her way to say I love you, because she prefers to show rather than tell. We see how Kay also works like this, in fact he leads her to the bed, surprising her. So Kay is Kell's daring side.

The reason why Lila doesn't want to let go of Kay even after Kell is back is because Kay is another side to him. A side to him he only shows privately to her, and that she knows deeply because it's a mix of his hopes and fears as well as his courage to dare and risk. He doesn't need to let Kay go. Kay is a side of him and she loves all the parts of him.

[tleeaves]

❤️💛💚💙🌙💉📺 🧟‍♀️ 🍓 🍊 🍐

Hi, lovely!! Thank you for sending in the ask!

❤️ how tall are you?

I am juuust scraping five foot one (5'1"). No use telling me any short jokes, I've heard them all already throughout my entire life so far. I was born on the tiny side and that never really changed.

💛 what is your favourite feature on yourself?

Hm, I'd have to say my hair. I really like all the ways it can sit/behave depending on when I washed it, if I let it dry naturally, what length it's at and so on. Also, I love how soft and fluffy it can feel. I have a bad habit of touching my hair actually, from like brushing/combing it back with my hands to twirling it around my fingers (not in a flirty way, just in a "wow I love the texture" way). Growing up, a lot of people were fascinated with my hair because of how thick it was too, and that kind of rubbed off on me maybe?

💚 where are you from?

Originally, a farm in Australia. Currently, in coastal suburbia, still Australia!

💙 do you have any siblings?

Yes! Three. They're all younger than me.

🌙 your zodiac (Sun, Moon, Rising)

Capricorn Sun, Leo Moon, and also Capricorn Rising (I think, I'm not totally knowledgeable about astrology)

💉 do you have tattoos and/or piercings

No tattoos (yet, I fully plan on getting some) and just single ear piercings. I'm not a huge fan of ear piercings (on myself) if I'm honest? Plenty of my friends and family get way more. The only other ones I've been considering are a nose stud and naval piercing.

📺 last show you watched

I think it was The Umbrella Academy? Season 4, incomplete, mostly cause I've seen some spoilers floating around and now I'm scared to finish it and be further disappointed by how it ends. Oh wait, I have been watching Jojo's Bizarre Adventures but I can't remember out of the two which was more recent. Still like early on in the first season of that, but I'm enjoying it.

🧟‍♀️ scariest thing that's happened to you

Hmm. Jokingly? Life. Or public speaking and confessing to crushes. Realistically? The lamest but most honest answer I can think of to say without going into my troubled childhood is self-injecting medication (prescribed and with instructions, don't worry, it wasn't anything that wasn't supposed to happen). I still get weird echoes of the pain in my thighs at the injection sites even though it's been almost a year since I went unmedicated. I used to majorly dread injection days, to the point where I made myself feel sicker than ever. I've now developed a phobia around needles which sucks since I still need regular blood testing. Even if I think about it now, I start feeling horribly sick and dissociate. Or, you know, learning to drive tended to kick my body into fight/flight/freeze. I fucking hate driving. Can we return to horseback as the main mode of travel? Or trains??

🍓 favourite food

How do I answer this?? I love food! Maybe chocolate? Waffles? Chocolate on waffles? Cold spanakopita? Pizza? Makaronopita/pastitsio? Aaaaaa all of the above. That's the best you're gonna get out of me.

🍊 favourite season?

Autumn!! Used to be summer because I really love the thunderstorms, but it's gotten waaay too hot where I now live for me to actually enjoy the season.

🍐 if you could make one character real, who would it be

Tough question, I love sooo many characters (I have long lists). Maybe Kell Maresh from the Shades of Magic series. I'd marry that guy. From Tokyo Debunker which you know me from? Either Sho or Tohma. Maybe Haru. Of the three though, I'd probably pick Sho.

[ravencromwell]

For the character ask game, Athos Dane: 7, 10, and 20.

7. A quote of them you remember: "No one suffers as beautifully as you." And before everyone starts laughing at my terrible cliche—it is terribly cliched, I would pair it with "My plaything is dead". The no one suffers as beautifully as you comes just after Athos's interlude with Beloc where Beloc tried, and did real damn good for a teenager, to be defiant, but eventually answered Athos's questions about his name etc. without yet having the Soul Seal on. Contrast this to Athos's "Sing for me, Holland" in ACOL, which Holland refuses to do.

Yes, Beloc is undoubtedly fun, but fundamentally, he knows how this game is going to go. The fact that Holland still has defiance, after seven years, seems to just fucking enthrall Athos. He makes Holland fill the blood goblets partially just to fuck with Kell, but also for that flicker of rage and humiliation Kell notices as being so out of character. Fundamentally, he doesn't know when Holland will give him the last scrap of power, and that's what keeps him coming back.

But any love or fascination or what have you is utterly gone once Holland is no longer a spectacle: my plaything, he says, in his own pov while talking to his sister. He feels "annoyance at his servant's incompetence" The one time he mentions Holland by name, it's to tell Kell how he and Holland are fundamentally flawed when compared to Athos.

Everything this man did for seven fucking years around Holland was either about furthering his goals or getting some kind of reaction, be it in his choice of conversation topics or experiment subjects.

Holland has a line that is so fucking sad to me in that context in ACOL where he says he never screamed if he could help it, out of the quixotic hope if Athos didn't get a reaction, he'd just kill him already. There's something so fucking tragic I don't have words for the fact that Holland's refusal to stop being a person, at least in small ways, and even the ways he tried to provoke Athos, were so much of what made him interesting enough to never let fade into the background as a particularly useful pair of hands. Because as we see with essentially sending Beloc out as canon fodder, and again with the dismissive "my plaything" comment after Holland's dead, once there's no longer potential for interesting power dynamics, he's bored moving on. 

10. Describe the character in one sentence.: "Intelligence has never tempered my desire. It merely ensures I take what I wish without consequence."—Athos Dane, to his hypothetical biographer, poor bastard.

20. A weird headcanon:

He may have learned to read on the coast primarily to sniff out magic, but when he arrives at the castle, he finds he quite enjoys books outside of magic. Vortalis was a military histories fan, which Athos "journey of the battle" absolutely fucking devours for the play by play.

Astrid likes the White London version of Caesar: careful, methodical, only moving when the field was to his advantage.

Athos, though, it's the underdogs. The White London Hannibal bringing his elephants in what everyone called folly; the Lord Caradoc/Caratacus resisting a much larger force. Just _immensely his jam.

And once he got started, he wanted more of anything Holland thought might rouse his interest. I don't think the Danes had any _reason to go to Grey London, but I suspect that by God, if the Mareshes Antari could go, they sent Holland there on the semiregular (I will play with the toys, too!) One of the things Grey had neither Red nor White did was a thriving fiction culture. And if you're one Holland Vosijk, who wants to be able to bring back some escapism for yourself, you'd better be prepared to bring back gifts.

Which leads me to: Athos Dane, sometime Shakespeare fan and more often critic.

1. Huge, huge fucking fan of Iago. Iago knows how to properly manipulate some people. (Except of course, as is the problem with so many people, he got squeamish in the end. If he had killed the messengers from Venice when they found him in the alley, he would never have needed to kill his wife and certainly never have been tortured and executed. But Iago pre–Othello Act Five: _spectacular.

2. Huge Richard III fan—likes all the histories, honestly. But that "winter of our discontent" monologue: gets him _every time. Richard, now there's a man who knows how to embrace being hated. (Though that he cares at all about fool's opinion of him just demonstrates he lacked an Astrid. Without that one person for unconditional affection and non-judgment, he could only embrace it so far.

3. Hamlet completely cracks him up in an awful way. Or rather, the ways in which Holland and Hamlet's desire for revenge mirror one another. "You thought you were Hamlet, coming down that hall and did not understand we were not his foolish uncle!"

4. The rest of it: Romeo and Juliet, the comedies, most of the other tragedies, just _trash. Characters too weak to dominate the way they should or unrealistic ("blood never denies blood what they want" he says of the Capulets etc. smiling beatifically at Astrid.

5. Astrid has the copy of Titus Andronicus. Major Queen Tamora fangirl "We shall serve the Arnesians their royals in pie," Athos says, when Astrid sighs over missing their opportunity with Holland.

Athos is very theatrical, has a multitude of ideas for how to stage the Shakespeare sets with magic when they take Arnes, and is very keen to read other plays.

[zmeydeva-arch]

plots please!! please feel free to pick any from my list but off the top of my head you can spin: kell, freydís, kaghan, or adam!

▐ ⊹ ⁺ a little plotting meme ) ACCEPTING!

¹· zoya & kell: starring directly at your grishaverse for him rn i feel like there are 2 routes to take here considering i have a mess of canon verses for zoya within her universe. BUT i think having kell as a little palace instructor given his unique skillset could be an INTERESTING concept or better yet and he could be the zuko to zoya's aang and help her get a better grasp on her corporalki abilities post dragon shenanigans. ROUTE 2 would be more of a ketterdam-flavored situation. not sure how kamerov as an alter ego plays into this verse but if he is doing secret maybe evil illegal stuff for maresh family on the down low i think sapphire is a good person to have in his corner/ NOT THAT SHE WOULD BE SO WILLING!! she has to get something out of it but it compels me somehow

CONVERSELY i decide to flip the script and make zoya a black london antari because why not and i can finally get the corruption arc i always dreamed of out of her. this verse literally is vibes alone right now and i haven't thought about it until this very second but i would be willing to develop it more if it is something that interests you

²· zoya & freydís: you are gonna need to hold my hand i am so scared right now. i know literally nothing about god of war but what i gather is we are heavy on the norse mythology here (again, something else i only have surface level knowledge on ) BUT if there is some sort of way for pantheons to mingle here i have been toying with a slavic myth verse for zoya on the down low. she is champion of veles who is sent to hunt the god perun in somewhat of a rehashing of their timeless war against one another. so oops as a dragon she swallows an aspect of the storm god and gains some of his divinity and memory in the process. so this is kinda similar to having uhh memories that are not their own and having to deal with it they can relate 🤍

of course i am always down for a way to work a character into the grishaverse. obviously the concept of past lives and sainthood is a known convention already. i don't want to presume anything about freydís' status in universe but perhaps skaði was a saint of old once. they could possibly follow a similar path to zoya in terms of reawakening grisha magic prior to the establishment of orders/ when it became corrupted and cut off from its source.

we can also figure out a regular fantasy verse here i have so many Thots i am sure we will stumble on SOMETHING

³· zoya & kaghan: my little web-winged faeries my cinnamon apples. i feel like kaghan could possibly make her worse in this universe and i am 100% here for it. we threaded them a bit but i would be down to develop this concept further in terms of him coming to her aid post her father's death. i also remember me saying i thought it would be interesting if they had been childhood friends in this verse ( so very far back considering how old they both are lol ) but falling out of touch once juris decides to form his own court and essentially go rogue. the ethereal court is very much new amongst the long-standing higher courts which means this war with the spring court will either completely destroy is status and credibility or solidify it as a universal power amongst the high fae. it means a potential powerful ally for kaghan and also i know they would have mad banter am i wrong?

i was gonna suggest i make an ac.otar verse for her but do you really want that? be real with me. you would have to theysplain the universe to me and i'm pretty sure you are so divergent it wouldn't even make sense to bother with it. anyway i just want more kaghan trying to instruct her and give her council in a very volatile time. not sure what the broader implications of allying with the night court would be from a diplomatic standpoint so i would like to hear your take on that! is there gossip? is there oo'ing and ah'ing from the audience or is everyone hardcore judging her right now.

⁴· zoya & adam: witchypoos!! witchypoos!! i honestly can't see zoya working very well in a trc verse but when i figure it out i will let you know. although, so far i am enjoying them in an urban fantasy setting. we don't get to see adam interact with other witches after persephone's death so i think him and zoya forming more of a study group around magic seems NEAT. she could get into harvard i believe in her so consider a la ninth house ( you haven't read it i know but here me out ) they have their own little occult secret society where they probably tamper with dark forces they shouldn't.

they have a writing seminar 5pm but also a seance set for 7pm sometimes you just gotta bring your lavender scented candles with you to class! but for real i like the idea of them being hedge witches while they go to this prestigious university. it is formal education by day informal education by night. how very dark academia of them!

[battyaboutbooksreviews]

🦇 The Fragile Threads of Power Book Review 🦇

❓ #QOTD If you could control any element (earth, water, air, fire, bone), which would you choose? 🦇 Once, there were four worlds, nestled like pages in a book, each pulsing with fantastical power, and connected by a single city: London. Until the magic grew too fast, and forced the worlds to seal the doors between them in a desperate gamble to protect their own. The few magicians who could still open the doors grew more rare as time passed and now, only three Antari are known in recent memory―Kell Maresh of Red London, Delilah Bard of Grey London, and Holland Vosijk, of White London. Only Tes, a girl with an unusual magical ability, can bring them together―or unravel it all.

💜 Victoria Schwab's world-building is vivid, layered (okay, slight pun intended there), and exact. Her character development is near flawless, each voice distinct yet familiar. From page one, you'll fall into this story, these worlds, and lose yourself until the very end. There are many threads at play here, each one intertwined to create a vast storytelling tapestry, characters united even before they realize it. Saying anything more wouldn't do this story (calling it a book when it contains so much, gives SO much to fans of this world) wouldn't do it justice.

💙 Look. Usually, I love a high fantasy story I can get lost in. We're not getting a fresh world we've never explored, though; stepping back into the world of A Darker Shade of Magic felt like stepping through the looking glass or wardrobe, flying through Neverland or traversing the Hundred Acre Wood. There's a comforting familiarity to it. So when I say this book was too long (648 pages), I mean some chapters are superfluous. We're given the point of view of a character who is killed off, only to see him delivery a package to a primary character. It was unnecessary (especially considering a magical device that would have granted us a view at his main scene, which was all we needed). I loved being able to learn so much more about these characters, to gain insights into their minds and hearts in ways we couldn't have before, but...yeah. It was too much. It's almost like (I'm gonna be so nerdy here for a second) watching Critical Roll live before they decide which scenes make it to the animated series--you're given every, little, thing.

🦇 Recommended for high fantasy fans and fans of Avatar the Last Airbender/Legend of Korra. Any fan of VE Schwab will fall into this familiar world immediately.

✨ The Vibes ✨ 🪡 Fantasy Fiction 🪡 Historical Fiction 🪡 Magic 🪡 The Shades of Magic Universe 🪡 Queer Ship 🪡 Multiple POVs

💬 Quotes ❝ Some people cannot see the need for change until it’s done. ❞ ❝ A head gets lost, but a heart knows home. ❞ ❝ As if people were just anchors, dead weight designed to hold you fast, drag you down. Caring could drown you, if you let it. But it could also help you float. ❞ ❝ He had a smile that could charm a shadow into the light. She had a glare that could send it back. ❞ ❝ Never doubt your importance or your power. ❞

[mistwraiths]

3 stars

I thought long and hard about how to rate this book and I think I've settled on 3 stars, maybe 3.25 for a number of reasons. Overall, I do think this is a good book and I enjoyed my time with it. I'm eager to read more and I think Cassandra Clare did a good job of departing from the Shadowhunter world and diving into adult fantasy.

First, I'll address something that has been mentioned in reviews and from people. The similarities between this book and V.E. Schwab's A Darker Shade of Magic series. Are there similarities? I think the answer is both yes and no. Some things are harder to justify or ignore and some while similar-ish have enough differences to argue. An orphan named Kell is taken to serve as the prince's bodyguard. While the concept is familiar, the exact same with the same name makes it... odd. A main character girl is named Lin, and she has magic. There is differences, yes, but the name is fairly close enough to Lila. There's a race of people called Ashkar who are called Askari. In ADSOM, the name for certain magicians is Antari. Again, differences yes but similar names. Does CC or Schwab own A names, no! But there's a character who has a lot of page time in running things named Mayesh, when the royals in Castellane last name is Maresh. Castellane colors are predominantly red, and gold. Red London. There's an explicit they use "Gray hells" which is an odd usage, and Gray is another color featured IN ADSOM. It's enough that while I was reading, it felt in my mind that did no one reading this before in passes and edits think, hmm maybe we should change some names? I might not have blinked twice if they had changed Kel's name. Maybe not even thought of ADSOM. I could be thinking too much into it and it could be totally coincidental, but it was enough to make me feel slightly leery about it. It ISN'T exactly like the other book, there's many differences and of course, it is its own story. But I personally felt like I had to deduct a star.

My second biggest problem here is that this book takes about 200 pages to stop beating you over the head with all the world information and all these character names. I think a personae dramatis would really be beneficial, especially since most of the side characters especially in the nobility feel interchangeable. Even after 200 pages, there's still info dumps and such, and things still take time. It's a much better read by far after 200 pages, because things are moving.

But nothing truly ever happens in this book except for the end. Kind of. This book mostly felt like a huge set up. Which isn't the WORST thing but you can make it feel more entertaining or well paced. I think 200-300 pages could have been cut out and it would have felt like a faster paced book.

Lin was by far the most interesting character and my favorite. I really loved her and enjoyed learning everything about her work, her struggles, her people, etc.

The majority of the book follows Kel and honestly, he's a bit of a bore. He's a nice character but I don't love him and find him a little bland. Conor is far more interesting but we do not get any POV from him. I'm also interested in Antonella and Joss, but we don't get much from either and no POVs.

I know this book was marketed as a forbidden romance but there's almost no romance in this book. You can see where there's hints of it but there's nothing of what I consider romance or even Cassandra's typical pining and tension. There's light tension if anything. I am rooting for Lin and Conor. I don't care much about Kel and Antonella, I'd rather him and Merren.

I was SO SAD about Luisa and Vienne.

I'm looking forward to see what happens next. I'm hoping there isn't any CC standard love triangles in this series. Some of the subject matter is a more mature so I do think she was successful in switching to adult fantasy but in places it does sometimes feel like it's YA or it doesn't dig really deeper into some things I'd like it to.

[lumau]

This is a silly little idea my brain spat out at random when thinking about the Maresh brothers' soul bond.

Rating: T

Relationships: Alucard Emery/Rhy Maresh; Delilah Bard/Kell Maresh

Kell / Alucard remote bickering; post-ACOL; Fluff & Humour

***

Rhy clutched at his chest and winced.

He fumbled to quickly undo the buttons of his tunic, underneath revealing four long, clearly visible streaks down his torso.

"Sanct!" he cursed and rubbed at the scratches. "Are you okay? What happened?" Alucard inquired, concern in his voice.

"Lila happened," said Rhy, pouting, "Unless my brother is currently fighting a full grown tiger, which I dare to doubt."

"Bard? Oh!" Understanding dawned on Alucard's face, and a mischievous grin played around his lips. "I was not aware that your brother has a rather wild..."

"Please! Can we not discuss Kell's sexual preferences?" The king winced again, as further scratches appeared on his collarbone. "It's annoying enough that I'll have to endure them remotely."

Alucard gave him a sympathetic smile and patted his leg. "Fine. I'll save my sass to wind your brother up the next time I get the chance. There's no way I'm not going to use this against him."

Rhy shook his head and got up from the sofa.

"Anything I might be able to do to help?" Alucard watched him pacing the room.

Rhy turned back to him, looking troubled. "Luc, I don't feel as if my body is my own right now, so..."

"Hey, for once I did not mean it in a suggestive way," Alucard got up and took the king's hands, "That was a genuine question."

Rhy sighed. "Any distraction to make this less awkward would be appreciated."

"How about a good bottle of wine and a game of cards on the balcony?" smiled Alucard. "And the winner gets to decide on how we’ll take vengeance for your discomfort."

*

Kell rubbed his eyes and stretched, as he scrambled out of bed. It had been a week, but he still hadn't fully gotten used to the feeling of the slightly rocking planks under his feet in the morning. Especially after another damn short night it still gave him a moment of queasiness. The Spire had dropped anchor in the evening, but it seemed he had slept in, as the ship was already moving again. He had just taken his shirt off and started to splash some cold water in his face from the bowl, when a clearly well rested Lila poked her head in the door. "Look who's finally up!" she greeted him, and he grumbled, but pulled her in for a kiss. Lila traced down the scratches that showed bright red on Kell's pale chest today with an approving look. "Not much sleep, hm?"

"Again!" groaned Kell, "I have no clue how they make it through their days or how long they plan to keep this up."

"Come on," Lila sniggered, sitting down on the mussed bed. "Are you not happy for your brother that he's having a good time?"

"I would appreciate his good time more if it wasn't for Emery sharing it with him," said Kell and turned back to the water bowl. "I can't help but feel that he is using our bond to annoy me."

Just in that moment Lila burst out laughing.

Kell shot around to eye her suspiciously. "What's so funny about that?"

She clapped her hands over her mouth, still laughing uncontrollably.

"Hey, what is it?" His frown grew deeper.

Lila snorted, struggling to regain her composure. "Kell," she gasped, "Turn around."

"What?"

"Just do it!"

He obliged, turning away from her, and Lila exploded in another wave of laughter.

"Sanct, what is so hilarious?" Kell threw his hands up in exasperation.

Lila walked over to him. "Piece of advice," she winked and kissed his shoulder, before turning to leave the cabin again. "Might be better if you didn't show yourself shirtless to anyone else for a bit."

Kell froze for a moment, then realization hit him. He rushed to the small mirror that hung in one corner and hastily craned his neck to find an angle that showed him his back. Long, red streaks ran down all along his spine from his neck to just above the waistband, forming three large letters.

A

S

S

Lila was halfway up to the deck, as she heard a muffled scream behind her.

"Bastard! I'll wring his fucking neck!"

She chuckled to herself, and leapt up the rest of the stairs, a spring in her step.

[astrangergivingthestrangewelcome]

Reasons to Love Kell Maresh (a long rambling list of traits and situations)

- So let’s start out with shallow here 

- FASHION Baby! red hair with bangs to cover his black eyes, plus a Regency era coat that he can change to fit every occasion? No matter what London he’s in he’s serving looks

- This is important to me, his smile. He gets made fun of all the books for not smiling, but that’s because he doesn’t get the chance to be happy & carefree most of the books and he doesn’t have the ability to put on a happy face when he’s not (not that that’s a bad trait to have, it’s just not his personality). Schwabb does write him smiling a few times when Lila and Rhy are actually... ya know, not stressing him out and instead making him feel good, and it’s all the more special because you as the reader know the smile is genuine. 

- his fucking humility jesus christ let’s rehash his situation. He is. the MOST powerful magician in his world, and he’s been told this from a young age. On top of that he’s raised as a member of the royal family. It would be understandable if this made him one haughty motherfucker but no. He doesn’t think he’s better than anyone + he actively revels being in places like Grey London where he can be anonymous

- speaking of humility, if Kell were a different person, his upbringing would be his villain backstory. I mean come on he had a LOT of Loki potential, told he was part of the royal family but not really treated like a son by the King and Queen. Always knowing that Rhy was the real royal, and the one who really had their parent’s love. That sounds like the perfect recipe for attempted coup but no. While Kell is somewhat messed up by the king and queen’s treatment of him, he doesn’t begrudge Rhy anything

- So let’s talk about Rhy

- Things I Love About Kell’s Love for Rhy (a long rambling list within a long rambling list)

+ That Rhy’s  heartbreak broke Kell’s heart so much he hates Alucard more than I think Rhy EVER did.

+ No matter what Rhy does on his binge drinking nights, Kell has his back and falls asleep in a chair beside his bed just in case. You all remember that night? I sure do

+ Even though Kell definitely resents the fact post soul-bond his life is no longer his own, he doesn’t pin his resentment on Rhy. He resents the situation, but never his brother. 

+ even after all the emotional bullshit he got put through in Book 2 by well, everyone Very Much including Rhy, his impulse to run away from his responsibility only lasts for a night and melts with Rhy’s apology. His loyalty to his brother is that strong.

+ asdfkjasl do you all remember the book 2 cliffhanger and how he BROKE HIS OWN hands with how desperately he was trying to get out of the collar so the soul bond wouldn’t be broken and Rhy wouldn’t die. 

+ also you all remember how after that at the beginning of Book 3 he was running around literally bleeding himself dry trying to save as many people as possible until he was about to drop from exhaustion and had to get a few hours of sleep? He doesn’t even go to his own bed, he can only justify the rest to himself if he sleeps slumped over Rhy’s bedside. Also he was probably so worried by almost losing Rhy that he was only able to be calm enough to sleep in the same room as his (breathing) brother.

+ At the end of the series when he leaves to travel, it’s made clear that if Rhy were a more selfish person he could have gotten Kell to stay. Even his big attempt to do something purely to please himself is contingent on the people he loves not needing him too much

+ maybe it would be healthier if Kell could be more selfish but, I just, I think that his loyalty and devotion to those he loves is so noble and I honor him for it. 

- Okay so moving on from Rhy and Kell

-  He’s just so... naturally kind. It’s easy to be kind when you’re happy, which makes it all the more meaningful that Kell is kind no matter how unhappy or stressed out he is.

- Things I Love About Kell’s Natural Kindness ( a slighting less rambling list)

+ he’s kind to King George. Not just “oh this man is mentally ill so I should be gentle with him” he actively makes time to tell the king stories about Red London and give him coins because it makes the king happy. 

+ even though he thinks Ned Tuttle is a tad laughable, he recognizes his earnestness and after their first meeting, he doesn’t belittle him or look down on him.

+ the whole reason he got duped into taking the black stone into Red London because he was trying to be kind to the white London lady

+ The first time he went back for Lila she was just some girl. Some girl that had actively made his life harder by pickpocketing him and then tying him to a bed actually. But he still wasn’t going to let Holland kill her in cold blood (cue Thor meme)

+ oh my god the bit of Kell’s backstory that’s revealed in the ACOL extended edition. When 5 year old Kell (oh my god can you imagine how CUTE 5 year old Kell was I need a fanart of it) learns A Hasari the first thing he does is go over to that old sick dog and try to make him feel better. My heart. 

- Anyways moving on. 

- He gets Holland. At least more than everyone else. He’s the only one who realizes how damaged he is and that he deserves kindness and at the minimum to be left alone. It’s completely understandable why Holland puts up his walls and doesn’t let anyone in, but if he’d only let Kell befriend him, it would have done him good.

- That night with Lila... that boy has. Moves. and frankly was anyone surprised by this. 

- His romance with Lila is sweet... I’m gonna level with you though it’s not really my favorite aspect of the series. I like it alright but it’s not what I focused on while reading so if somebody reading this LOVED it, please gush in a reblog

- He started trips to White London when he was 13 or so!! That was way to young to be going on diplomatic missions to a place as scary as that with absolutely no protection but his own skill as an Antari, but as far as we know he allowed himself to be put through it. It makes me mad at the King and Queen everytime I think about it really, but I admire that he took the responsibility and allowed himself to be put in that position of vulnerability without balking. He’s so brave

- Just, again For the people in the back. He’s so fucking brave. The series is full of moments where Kell has to face an opponent he’s terrified of. Walking into the Dane’s throne room. Making the decision he was going to trap himself in Black London. Facing Osaron. Everything. Kell spends so much of this series scared, and yet every single time. he rises to the occasion, he faces his fear head on and does the thing anyway. 

- yeah... I’m about done

- please if you feel I missed something, feel free to hijack this post

[spritewrites]

like children

Fandom: Shades of Magic (by V.E. Schwab)

Characters: Kell Maresh & Rhy Maresh

Word Count: 2055

“Go away. I’m working on a strategy.”

It was late afternoon when Kell said it, but he still hadn’t changed out of his bedclothes. As a matter of fact, he couldn’t quite remember when the last time he’d changed his clothes was. His blue eye was red with exhaustion, and his reddish hair was sticking up at odd angles - he’d been running his fingers through it. Thirty-six hours awake isn’t ideal for anybody, magic or not.

“For what?”

Rhy was laying on his bed, idly picking at the bedcovers. He had the cool, measured tone that Kell recognized, the one that made the frustration rise in his throat. It was the tone Rhy always adopted when Kell stayed up too long. The one he used when he was trying to convince him of something, something he didn’t think he’d like. Such as calming down. Or eating. Or sleeping.

“For the games.”

Rhy barked out a laugh. “The Essen Tasch? Saints, Kell, why? I entered you to be a stress reliever, not so you could run yourself into the ground!”

A fist clenched around the edge of his parchment, wrinkling the corner. It took a moment for Kell to realize that it was his. He cleared his throat, smoothing the paper back out as best he could. Rhy didn’t need to worry about him, on top of all his responsibilities with the competition.

“If I’m going to compete,” he replied, “I’d prefer not to be humiliated in my own city.”

The stray piece of thread that Rhy had been tugging at came loose. “You’re the most powerful magician in Arnes, probably in the whole world. None of the other champions can compete with an Antari. Your win is… inevitable.”

“You flatter me.”

Rhy laughed at that. “Trust me, brother, I don’t intend to do anything of the kind.”

Kell groaned, trying to steady his voice before Rhy can realize exactly how exhausted he was. It couldn’t work, he knew. The only reason Rhy was here was because he could feel that bone-aching tiredness in their bond.

“Still. I should be doing research. Practicing. Alone.” His voice dropped slightly, almost imperceptibly. “I’ve never worked with only one element before.”

Rhy’s eyes were lit with amusement, and something else. Something sadder. “Well. You’ll have to… hold back, then. So, there’s not much need to study. You can rest.” A hint of mischief grew in his smile. “Besides, you’ll need all your strength if you go up against Alucard Emery.”

Kell felt his cheeks grow hot, his mild scowl deepening into a frown. His classic look, and he knew even before Rhy opened his mouth that his brother would tease him for it, but for all his secrets, he could never hide his feelings from him. Besides, anything he felt, Rhy would feel too. Inevitability again.

“Ah, come, is my favorite brother feeling a little self-destructive?” Rhy teased, leaning up on his elbows. His black hair shone in the light, painting the perfect picture of an innocent angel. Kell nearly snorted. Anything but.

“If you’re only going to distract me, then I don’t recommend sticking around. There’s the door.” A gust of wind ruffled Rhy’s robes on its path to fling the chamber door open. Kell turned back to his papers, ignoring the grumbling he could hear from the prince’s direction.

The leash he was tethered to here at the castle felt shorter than ever, and Rhy’s relentless presence was a symptom of that tether. He could remember a time, not so very long ago, when his frequent travels as the crown’s Antari had kept his time with Rhy short. Perhaps too short. His thoughts would drift often to his carefree brother, envious both of his position and his weightlessness as he waltzed through Red London society, blind to the true depth of the responsibilities that Kell held. During those times, he had often wished to be able to be closer to Rhy, like they had been as children, siphoning off some of his easy charm and wit. Now, he thought ruefully, he wished dearly that his brother would go away.

Kell was snapped from his thoughts by a hard pinch at the back of his neck. He cursed, spinning to fume at his brother. “I thought I told you to get out and stop bothering me!”

Rhy hadn’t moved – he was lazing on his back, hands tucked behind his head and wearing a grin that spoke only of mischief. Saints, Kell was familiar with that grin. Stupid bond.

“You did. But you seemed unfocused. I figured I’d draw your attention back to your… work.”

“You’re a menace.”

“I knew what I was doing,” Rhy replied easily. He rolled onto his stomach, clutching a satin-edged pillow to his chest and kicking his bare feet. “Truthfully, I wanted to spend some time with my favorite brother. Since, of course, you’re not busy. Not busy doing anything healthy, anyway.”

Kell rolled his eyes. “You’re acting like a child.”

One of Rhy’s eyebrows quirked up with almost a mind of its own. His curly head dropped into something like a bow, and he adopted his most regal voice, the one he reserved for the high court.

“Forgive me, Master Kell, for my insolence. Please, continue your work. I shan’t disturb you again.”

This time Kell did snort, a gruff, low sound that hurt his throat. He didn’t think that was supposed to hurt. Come to think of it, a lot of him was hurting right now. Rhy probably felt it too. Maybe sleep would be welcome.

He’d scarcely had the thought when he felt something large and soft hit the back of his neck. He reeled to see his brother casually staring up at the ceiling, feigning innocence, and one of his pillows on the floor. Kell narrowed his eyes, but Rhy refused to look at him. He was actually humming. Ass.

“I know what you’re doing.”

“Hm?” Rhy replied, sliding his gaze over to Kell’s furious glare.

“You’re going to try to wear me out, so I have to sleep.”

“Oh, am I?”

Rhy sounded amused. Kell fought the urge to set the bed on fire, just to see his brother jump. He settled on rolling his eyes.

“It’s not going to work.”

“It isn’t?”

“I’m impervious to your efforts to distract me.”

“Ah, you are?”

“I am as immovable as a Veskan warrior.”

“I see.”

“So. There’s really no need to try. And you can just leave me be.”

Rhy grinned, eerie and catlike, a grin that made the hair on the back of Kell’s neck stand on end. Sanct.

“Where’s the fun in that?”

The shriek that Kell let out as his brother launched at him would have been quite embarrassing, had it not been disguised by the screech of chair legs against the stone floor when they both toppled over. Instantly, Kell’s wrists were in Rhy’s grasp, and he grunted and squirmed as best he could, but the crown prince was heavier than he looked.

“Get off,” he wheezed, heating up his palms and trying to grab at where Rhy’s hands held him firm – not enough to burn, just enough to make him let go – but he couldn’t quite reach. His heels scrabbled against the wooden floor, and distantly he could hear Rhy chuckling. Kell felt his face grow hot with rage and embarrassment at being so easily overtaken. The absolute bastard.

In a desperate effort, Kell filled his lungs and blew out a huge gust of magical wind, lifting his brother off of him, but also scattering his papers in a tornado around the room. No matter. He’d gather them back up when he wasn’t fighting for his life.

“No fair using magic!”

Kell knew how to wrestle with Rhy. He’d had practice. In recent years he’d sometimes been called upon to act as his sparring partner during Rhy’s combat lessons, but he’d been rolling over the grooved stone of the halls of this palace with his brother since before he could remember.

Unfortunately, Rhy had had the same practice. He managed to get an arm around Kell’s knees, but Kell still had the upper hand, most of his wriggling body still free, and he couldn’t quite pin his legs down for the kicking. Kell tugged at Rhy’s elbow, trying to dislodge the vice-like grip, but suddenly found himself with a face full of the same pillow that had hit his back before.

Kell yelped, twisting to try to escape over the bed, grasping desperately at his slipping sheets in an effort to climb away. Unfortunately, Rhy was Rhy, and when it came to these fights, when it came to Kell, Rhy was merciless. He’d scarcely made it over the edge of the mattress when he felt his younger brother at his back, grabbing at his waist and laughing breathlessly with the sheer energy of the fight.

Kell was laughing too, sort of, trying to fight it, so it was coming out more as huffs through gritted teeth. Rhy looked absolutely delighted at this development, much to Kell’s chagrin. Part of the game, at least as it was originally played, was Kell trying to maintain his mask of dignity. Laughing wasn’t part of it. Not ideally, anyway. His body sometimes had other ideas. Especially when Rhy was looking up at him like that, so adoringly, so carefree. The giddiness of it all was hard to fight.

And Rhy knew it.

The prince managed to sneak a hand under his brother’s shirt and dig into his sides, exactly where he knew Kell was horribly ticklish. Any other time, Kell would have shrugged him off easily and scolded him for his ridiculous, childish behavior. But his utter exhaustion made his nerves sing, and, to his horror, he broke into hoarse, helpless giggles. Rhy’s smile widened, and at first that made Kell struggle harder – Smug bastard, he thought – flipping onto his back to shove at the prince’s ruthless fingers, the ones that knew exactly where to prod to get the best reactions.

But then he saw that look on Rhy’s face. It was everything that he always wanted to see – joy, mischief, humor, love. Everything he was always looking for when he gazed into those honey-brown eyes. He couldn’t deny Rhy that, not now. So, despite his natural instincts, Kell stopped fighting, falling back against the sheets and resigning himself to full-out laughter just as evil hands crawled their way up to his ribs.

“Do you yield?” teased Rhy, fighting back laughter of his own as he tried to tune out the mirrored (albeit faint) echoes of sensation on his own body.

Kell tried to speak, he really did, but it’s awful hard to get out a coherent sentence when your not-so-little brother is tickling you to pieces. Finally, he managed a nod, and Rhy mercifully rolled off of him to collapse onto the foot of the bed, a huge grin on his face.

“F-fuck you,” Kell choked, clutching his stomach and gasping for air.

Rhy chuckled. “Feeling tired yet?”

Kell swatted weakly at him, still leaking giggles. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

The creases around Rhy’s eyes softened a little. “You don’t laugh like that anymore.”

For a moment, Kell simply felt his breath enter and leave his lungs, listening to the wind whistle outside the window. He could lay here forever like this. Then he took Rhy’s hand.

“No. No, I don’t.”

For a while, the two brothers lay beside one another, catching their breath and staring up into the dark fabric that covered the ceiling. If you unfocused your eyes enough, Kell thought, you could almost imagine yourself soaring into that inky blackness, dodging between the stars.

“Hey, Kell?”

A sigh through his nose. “Yeah?”

“…Never mind.” Rhy’s voice was small. Kell held his breath. For a second, he was certain that if he turned to look at his brother, he would see him exactly as he’d been that night after he’d rescued him from the Shadows. He squeezed his hand.

“Rhy?”

“Mm?”

“Thank you.” For cheering me up. For knowing me well enough to know that I need cheering up. For the Essen Tasch. For being my brother.

“You’re welcome.”

They stayed like that for a long time, long after Kell fell asleep.

[purplebass]

Silver Lining // Kell and Lila

Like I said earlier, I needed writing therapy. Tonight, my choice were Kell and Lila (again). I don’t know, these days I really feel them. I’m inspired to write FF about them. And I hope you enjoy it! x

Couple: Kelila, Kell Maresh and Lila Bard Rating: M Spoilers = No (this can be read without having finished the series)

A ship stood dark against the night sky. Aboard, just two passengers.

She suggested they took the vessel to dine on the sea. She said she missed being above water, having decided to settle down on land for the time being. She knew they couldn’t be away for too long. She was sure the time she would tell herself that she had to take a break would come. She never thought it would be this early, this unexpectedly.

Lila kissed him on the dock. Kell grazed her back with his hand, and she did the same to his neck. She loved burying her hands in his hair when their lips were too busy to speak, to breathe. She also adored when he did the same and tangled his calloused hand through her dark strands, then let his hand descend on her neck, on her chest.

Kell told her he loved her a couple of times. He used words, and not only gestures to demonstrate it. But she didn’t need to hear anything. If his affection only depended on the way they brushed each other’s lips ever so intensely, she didn’t need any confirmation that he had yielded himself to her completely, without losing himself. He was still Kell, but he also loved her so openly, so fiercely.

This feeling scared her, but she was also grateful for it. She had never been treasured like that before, and this was the reason why she hadn’t been shocked when she found out. But first, she had to acknowledge something else.

Lila dragged him to the cabin. She was sweating despite the season, but she hoped he wouldn’t notice. She glanced at him with eyes full of hopes and expectations and saw the same spark in his. He still hadn’t had enough of her, and she could see the hunger in his gaze, but also respect. He would never force her to do anything she didn’t want to do, and the same worked for her. She tried to shrug this sensation prickling the back of her head off her mind until they were below deck.

They resumed their kissing, which turned into disrobing each other of some of their clothing, which then evolved into exploring each other. They both took part in that, but for some reason, he had been the one who paid more attention to her body, to her need to be cherished. If her old self would see her now, she would laugh. Of all the things Lila envisioned in her future, she’d never thought –

“I’m a few weeks late,” she said out of the blue, unable to stop herself, as Kell had just laid his full lips on her stomach. It sounded better in her head, but now that it was finally out, she could heave a deep sigh of relief. “I’ve seen a doctor the other day, and he confirmed it.”

Kell had stilled below her, on his knees. On another occasion, this would have been very pleasing to see. After spending a lot of months with him, she had realized that she was always eager to know what he would do with his mouth. She had wondered what his lips would conjure in this moment. If they would even utter a word. Perhaps he would dive into the sea and swim back to the palace.

He lifted his chin to look at her. His hands still lain at the sides of her hips, and he still hadn’t removed them from there. He probably ignored that she was secretly thankful. She was still Lila Bard, but in that moment, she needed all the support she could get.

“What does this mean, Lila?”

“That I’m a mess,” she replied without thinking. “A mess with child,” she added nervously, rolling her eyes at the ceiling. She could feel the tears pricking the back of her eyes, but she wouldn’t cry. No, she wouldn’t –

She felt the absence of Kell’s hands when they left her hips. She was already missing them, but he wasn’t ready to let her go yet. He placed one of her face, tenderly brushing his knuckles over her cheek. Lila closed her eyes, wishing for the tears to stop. But it was useless.

“My lovely Lila,” Kell murmured gently. “Why are you crying?”

“I don’t know,” she told him, but in her heart, she knew that the real answer was: ‘Because I told you my secret and I’m afraid that you won’t like it. That you would leave me’.

She wiped her eyes with the back of her hand. This was so out of character for her, but there were several things she had done that far that she would have never thought she’d do a few years back. She shouldn’t be surprised.

“You know that I love you,” he told her again, in that same charming voice. The voice of a person who adored you, who would give their life for you. She could recognize it after a few times she’d heard it before. And she was certain that he meant it with every fiber of his being.

“Yes,” she murmured.

“Then you realize that I love every part of you,” he continued, his hand still firm and warm on the side of her neck. The other, roaming on her bare stomach. “And that I will love every part of you the same way that I love you. Wait, maybe even more.”

A frown crossed Lila’s face. “Even more?”

“Are you jealous?”

“I…” she bit her lip, “no”.

Kell grinned, and then he hugged her body to his chest.

“Thank you,” she said, her voice low. She knew he had heard her, but he didn’t reply. So, she tried to be as honest as possible, and as truthful. “I love you,” she added in an even hushed tone. It was the first time she had willed herself to actually say the words, but she had always tried to mean them through actions.

“I know,” he replied simply, and kissed her head, and held her tighter than he had done in the past. And Lila knew that she wouldn’t trade all of that for all the gold in the world.

[bookswithelli]

a darker shade of magic: review

synopsis:

Kell is one of the last Antari—magicians with a rare, coveted ability to travel between parallel Londons; Red, Grey, White, and, once upon a time, Black.

Kell was raised in Arnes—Red London—and officially serves the Maresh Empire as an ambassador, traveling between the frequent bloody regime changes in White London and the court of George III in the dullest of Londons, the one without any magic left to see.

Unofficially, Kell is a smuggler, servicing people willing to pay for even the smallest glimpses of a world they'll never see. It's a defiant hobby with dangerous consequences, which Kell is now seeing firsthand.

After an exchange goes awry, Kell escapes to Grey London and runs into Delilah Bard, a cut-purse with lofty aspirations. She first robs him, then saves him from a deadly enemy, and finally forces Kell to spirit her to another world for a proper adventure.

Now perilous magic is afoot, and treachery lurks at every turn. To save all of the worlds, they'll first need to stay alive.

review under the cut!

stars: ★★★★☆

First of all, although I rated this book 4 stars, there were some issues with it (mainly involving representation and characterization). I rated it 4 stars because I enjoyed reading it despite its issues, but I recognize that the mediocre representation may turn others away from this book.

characters & representation

Before I begin this section of the review, I would like to say that I am not visually impaired and therefore do not have any authority on that subject. My comments on the treatment of Lila's missing eye are merely based on my own observations and what I have heard from visually impaired people on the topic.

Lila:

A cross-dressing thief and aspiring pirate with a penchant for knives, Lila Bard brings to mind the likes of Inej Ghafa from Leigh Bardugo's Six of Crows and Elizabeth Swann from Pirates of the Caribbean. There were times when I really liked Lila; she can be sassy and morally questionable which is always interesting to see when well done. However, her character had a few issues that I wanted to address.

“Delilah Bard looked like a king. No...she looked like a conqueror.” pg. 289

When will fantasy authors stop romanticising conquerors and colonization?! This may be a smaller issue since aside from White London (which is villainized) there is no mention of it in the overarching plot, but this line just really bothered me. It makes me think that V.E. Schwab is a fan of adult and YA fantasy authors like Sarah J. Maas and others who write their main characters to be colonizers and romanticize it in the process. I don’t think this line was necessary at all, and I wish the second sentence had been removed or modified to something a little less problematic (e.g. she looked like a pirate/captain/etc.)

"How did you lose it...your eye?" -Master Tieren, pg. 327

It is revealed near the end of the book that Lila has been missing an eye for as long as she can remember, and she wears a glass eye as a replacement. This is all well and good, but the consequences of her impaired vision are never explored. The only reason the reader knows that Lila is missing an eye is because the author tells them. The narrative never discusses how Lila's lack of an eye affects her day to day life, and it's only brought into the story when it is needed for the plot.

It’s also worth mentioning that Lila is the only female character with a large role in this book, and no matter how “feminist” her character is, there’s not a lot of women in this book that are portrayed positively and with depth.

Rhy:

I actually really liked Rhy and I loved his relationship with Kell. I love sibling love in books and we so rarely get positive sibling relationships, so this was nice to see! It’s also really important to have queer people of color in books. However, I don’t think Rhy’s character is good bi/pan representation (I will refer to him as bi in this review for the sake of brevity, but it’s worth mentioning that neither term is mentioned so Rhy could canonically identify as either).

“He would flirt with a nicely upholstered chair, and he never takes anything seriously.” -Kell, pg. 254

As a queer girl who has identified as bisexual in the past and may in the future, this is bad bi rep 101. Schwab is perpetuating the stereotype of the “promiscuous bi”, or one who flirts and/or sleeps with everyone and everything. This is not a bad characteristic in itself, but it is harmful bi rep because that is the way every bi character is portrayed in media. It reinforces the idea that bisexual people in real life are all like this, and it also reinforces biphobes’ points of view when they say that bisexual people are more likely to cheat because they sleep with more people. This is pretty much the most common stereotype of a bisexual person, so while I doubt that Schwab intended to be harmful in her portrayal of Rhy, it shows that she did not do much research on LGBT+ rep when writing her characters. I do know that some bi people were not bothered by this; however, I believe that writers should stay away from stereotypes, especially when writing characters that are marginalized. Even though promiscuity is not an inherently bad trait, it is harmful when applied to bisexual people because it reinforces real peoples’ beliefs and affects real life bisexuals. This is especially important here because Rhy is the only narrative-confirmed LGBT+ character in the first book. It's not the worst representation I've seen, since Rhy does have a personality outside his flirtatiousness and promiscuity (in fact, it's confirmed that this is a coping mechanism for him) but it's certainly not the best, and I'm just tired of seeing bisexual people represented this way in fiction.

Kell:

I know a lot of people who didn’t like Kell very much, and that is understandable. However, I found him really compelling. It’s refreshing to see a male lead in this genre who’s not jacked and a brooding asshole whose only redeeming quality is his dick size. He’s definitely moody, but not to the point where he becomes an abusive alpha male type guy (yes, I am aware that this is a very low bar). I genuinely enjoyed his character because he’s flawed. He’s stubborn and moody but he’s incredibly caring and he genuinely wants to help people. He feels alienated from his family so he rebels and gets himself in trouble. His character is written well because he’s not perfect by any means, but he’s still likeable and you still root for him.

Holland:

Holland is what every YA love interest wishes they were. Honestly. He’s given no excuses for his actions, and yet he is still sympathetic. You understand that he is under the control of Astrid and Athos, but you also understand that all he has done for years is carry out their orders, and that changes a person. His story is heartbreaking, but that doesn’t change what he has done. He knows it, Kell knows it, Lila knows it, the reader knows it. Honestly, if he were in a YA fantasy romance, I bet Holland would be the love interest; his female “mate” would change him for the better, and he would never face the consequences of his actions. That makes his arc in this story all the more enjoyable. Holland is one of my favorite characters of all time, and not because he’s a perfect “book boyfriend” or whatever, but because his story and character are genuinely interesting and executed well.

worldbuilding

I loved the worldbuilding in this book. There was a bit of an info-dump in the beginning, but I’m willing to look past that because the world was so engaging and interesting that I forgot about the dense first chapter once I got past it. Each London has a distinct feel, and they are all almost tangible. The descriptions of each made me feel like I was in the Londons along with Kell and Lila. It seems like the system would be complicated, but Lila sums it up well:

“There’s Dull London, Kell London, Creepy London, and Dead London.” -pg. 198

After the initial info-dump, Schwab weaves information about the magic system seamlessly through the book, leaving enough mystery for the reader to wonder at what might happen in the next books, but never leaving out so much that the reader is confused. I really appreciated the rules that existed around magic. It’s draining, and Antari magic requires blood, which means there is a limit to how much you can perform at once. Magic is seen to affect the world beyond the characters and their main conflict, which I was very happy about as well. There are too many fantasy novels where the magic system has no rules and only exists to further the plot, but in this world you can see it everywhere. The politics of Red London and White London are affected by magic, even where it is not necessarily relevant to the plot. You can see small amounts of magic being performed in the streets of Red London: spells to protect from thieves, etc. Magic is normal for the people in Red London, and it is treated as such in the text.

pacing & plot

This book flew along. I’ve read it multiple times now, and every time, I can’t stop until I finish. And then I want to move along to the next book immediately. It manages to keep up a great pace and still build up to an exciting climax. Schwab’s lyrical writing is not flowery, but it draws the reader in and carries them along the story effortlessly. It’s very engaging and accessible language, which makes it a good stepping stone into adult fantasy (especially if you’re coming from YA).

Overall, I really enjoyed this book. The representation that it gets praised so highly for is disappointing, but aside from that I enjoyed most of the characters and the writing was beautiful. The plot and world were engaging and made me want to read the second book immediately (even though I’m on my 3rd or 4th reread). I would recommend this book for fans of YA fantasy who want to get into adult fantasy - this book is categorized as adult, but I found it a lot easier to read than other adult fantasies. For me, this book is a reminder that you can recognize the flaws in a book and still enjoy it, so remember to stay critical, even of your favorite books :)

[buckities]

i read books this year, so i’m doing a 2020 reading stats survey. just because.

Number Of Books You Read: 44 Number of Re-Reads: 1 Genre You Read The Most From: Fantasy

1. Best Book You Read In 2020? This is the biggest cheat answer of all, but I don’t care. Carry On by Rainbow Rowell, Vicious by V.E. Schwab, and everything that I’ve read so far of the Realm of the Elderlings series by Robin Hobb, from Assassin’s Apprentice to Fool’s Fate. That’s as much as I can narrow it down.

2. Book You Were Excited About & Thought You Were Going To Love More But Didn’t? Vengeful, by V.E. Schwab. I thought I’d love it. I did enjoy it, and Victor Vale is one of my favorite characters ever, but I didn’t get all that I wanted from it.

3. Most surprising (in a good way or bad way) book you read?   Surprising in a good way: The Kingdom of Copper, by S.A. Chakraborty. I did not enjoy City of Brass as much as I could have, and I absolutely loved this sequel from the very first page. I devoured every word of it.

4. Book You “Pushed” The Most People To Read (And They Did)? My peeps don’t really read books, so I’m just pushing with no hopes of ever getting anyone to read anything, but I pushed a lot for The Dresden Files series by Jim Butcher.

5. Best series you started in 2020? Best Sequel? Best Series Ender of 2020? Best series I started: The Realm of the Elderlings. Best Sequel: Royal Assassin, by Robin Hobb. Best Series Ender: A Conjuring of Light by V.E. Schwab.

6. Favorite new author you discovered in 2020? Robin Hobb.

7. Best book from a genre you don’t typically read/was out of your comfort zone? I guess I don’t typically read non-fantasy, so I’ll go with All The Light We Cannot See by Anthony Doerr, although you could argue (and you should argue) that it has fantasy elements.

8. Most action-packed/thrilling/unputdownable book of the year? Changes, by Jim Butcher. I could not find a chapter to just stop and take a breather.

9. Book You Read In 2020 That You Would Be MOST Likely To Re-Read Next Year? Vicious.

10. Favorite cover of a book you read in 2020? Vicious. And A Darker Shade of Magic. V.E. Schwab’s book covers are works of art, basically.

11. Most memorable character of 2020? “I remember all of them.” Bucky Barnes, Captain America: Civil War, c. 2016. No, seriously. But for this, I’ll go with The Fool from the Realm of the Elderlings series. He’s memorable alright.

12. Most beautifully written book read in 2020? The Liveship Traders trilogy, by Robin Hobb. All of it. I said what I said.

13. Most Thought-Provoking/ Life-Changing Book of 2020? I’ll go with Vicious for this one. Picking up books again was basically an experiment, and I didn’t know if it would work out for me. Vicious is the first one I read and I remember opening the book and going, very warily, “Hello, potential new friend.” And then I was mesmerized.

14. Book you can’t believe you waited UNTIL 2020 to finally read?  Dune by Frank Herbert.

15. Favorite Passage/Quote From A Book You Read In 2020? There’s so many deep meaningful passages that I’ve picked out, but as soon as I spotted this one, I deemed it my favorite quote of the year. I guess it makes sense only in context, but it still gets the prize: “You don't get to decide whether you're going or not, because I'm the captain and I already decided that. You're a ship, not a flowerpot.” YOU’RE A SHIP, NOT A FLOWERPOT. I love this line, shush. It’s in Mad Ship, by Robin Hobb.

16.Shortest & Longest Book You Read In 2020? Longest: Ship of Destiny by Robin Hobb, 903 pages. Shortest: Cemetery Boys by Aiden Thomas and Wayward Son by Rainbow Rowell technically seem to have the same number of pages, 352.

17. Book That Shocked You The Most Ship of Destiny.

18. OTP OF THE YEAR (you will go down with this ship!) Simon Snow and Baz Pitch from Rainbow Rowell’s Simon Snow series. I WILL GO DOWN WITH THIS SHIP!

19. Favorite Non-Romantic Relationship Of The Year My first response ended in, “But IS IT absolutely non-romantic, though?” So I’ll go with an answer that’s definitely non-romantic. Kell and Rhy Maresh from the Shades of Magic series. Honorary mention for Victor Vale and Eli Ever from the Villains series, because, damn, do they have an intriguing dynamic!

20. Favorite Book You Read in 2020 From An Author You’ve Read Previously Inadvertently Emma by Jane Austen, because all other authors were new to me. But that’s fine, I love Emma.

21. Best Book You Read In 2020 That You Read Based SOLELY On A Recommendation From Somebody Else/Peer Pressure/Bookstagram, Etc.: Carry On by Rainbow Rowell. Solely on the recommendation of an overexcited Booktuber.

22. Newest fictional crush from a book you read in 2020? Brashen Trell from the Liveship Traders trilogy. This man. THIS MAN. I HAVE SUCH A HUGE CRUSH ON THIS MAN.

23. Best 2020 debut you read? Cemetery Boys.

24. Best Worldbuilding/Most Vivid Setting You Read This Year? Well, the world of the Realm of the Elderlings series, shocking, I know. But honorary mention for The Daevabad Trilogy world, because wow.

25. Book That Put A Smile On Your Face/Was The Most FUN To Read? Carry On, hands down.

26. Book That Made You Cry Or Nearly Cry in 2020? I nearly cried or got teary-eyed for A BUNCH of books. I properly cried while reading All The Light We Cannot See, and I cried on my book hangover after A Conjuring of Light.

27. Hidden Gem Of The Year? I’ll go with Dead Beat from The Dresden Files. It redefined deeply how I feel for the series.

28. Book That Crushed Your Soul? Fool’s Fate, Robin Hobb. At some point I described it as, “It shattered my heart to pieces, then mended it, then poked at the cracks that are still there.”

29. Most Unique Book You Read In 2020? Vicious. The protagonists are both villains. It’s delightful.

30. Book That Made You The Most Mad (doesn’t necessarily mean you didn’t like it)? Beach Read, by Emily Henry. I partly blame the marketing though.

[ashintheairlikesnow]

Can you give us a little sneak peek for Endurance? I've missed your baby novel

My baby! I really do need to force myself to completely cut off all other writing projects long enough to finish it, I’m only like ten chapters from the end damn it. Okay, here is a hint of something coming:

The hand on his shoulder was heavy, but then, it had always been heavy. Heavier still when cold fingers slid up and over the front of his throat, trailed across, curved until Athos Dane’s palm was a block of ice over his neck. The slightest press and Beloc tilted his head back, chin up, until the back of his head rested against the king’s shoulder.

King of Makt and Arnes, too, in this moment, conqueror now of two worlds. 

“You have been a disloyal subject from the start, Beloc,” Athos murmured, lips just moving against his ear. 

Beloc set his jaw and stared straight ahead, tried to make himself look like Holland did - hollowed-out and empty of feeling, of pain, of anything but moving forward because the curse carved into his chest commanded it.

“Will you chase your death with further disloyalty?” Athos’s voice might as well have been a purr. He had won, he and his terrifying sister. They held two Londons in their hands, the true king of this strange colorful country locked in a tower with Kell.

Beloc stared straight ahead. Let Athos’s other arm snake around his waist. Swallowed against the continued push of Athos Dane’s hand. 

“I tried to chase my death,” He whispered. “You would not let me have it, my king.”

“No.” Athos paused, thinking. “I did not let my Holland have his death, either. Why would I grant you yours, when you are half the man he is?”

“You have never complained about how much of a man I am before.” Beloc was careful to speak in a whisper, still.

He didn’t want the girl hidden behind the door - the girl that Athos must not find, must not suspect, must not have the slightest reason to search for - to hear him speak his shame aloud.

“I know it was you who set them free while my sister was gone.” The arm tightened around his waist and so did Athos’s hand, slowly, inexorably pressing the air from his throat. Beloc closed his eyes, took the deepest breath he could, ready to hold for as long as possible. “I would like to know, Beloc, where my sister’s new toy pirate has run away to. You will speak truth.”

He could not force love. He could not order Beloc’s mind. But he could make him speak.

“Where is the pirate toy?”

Blood dripping from mouth and eyes, blazing with fury, bound for the prince in the tower. 

“Last I saw him,” Beloc said, “He was cursing Astrid’s name.”

It was true enough. And then the hand suddenly tightened and the air was forced from him all at once, Beloc only regretted lacking the air to laugh at Athos’s anger.

He wasn’t asking the right questions, not at all.

He should have asked for Beloc to tell him where was the girl with flaxen hair and seven swords and the most beautiful bloodlust Beloc had ever seen.

He should have asked Beloc where Holland was.

He should have wondered what exactly Holland Vosijk would do to save Kell Maresh. He should have known the answer would be anything.

[dregstrash]

Hihihi could we please get 44 or 46 for Kell x Lila (do they have a ship name??) thanks so much my goddess of fanfics!

Wow! What high praise!! Thank you so much for the ask! And for bringing back the loves of my life Kell and Lila. I think their ship name is Kelila. But I mean Kell x Lila works too. Hope you enjoy this!  You can send me an ask using This List!

“If you die, I’m going to kill you” 

It wasn’t often Lila was forced to sit on the sidelines. If anything, she was the one who destroyed the sidelines, but this time it couldn’t be helped. She may have been master of the seas, but no matter how hard she tried, she couldn’t order Kell around.

“I don’t have to worry about you doing anything stupid in London, do I?” She said lazily as she leaned against the door of their room. Kell huffed a laugh as he packed the last of his things in the small satchel on his shoulder.

Even after all these years, he still bore the tiredness that lingered in his face ever since they defeated Osaron. His movements weren’t as graceful or fluid anymore, but there was less tension in his shoulders. They were more relaxed and free, and Lila felt a thrill shoot up through her when she realized it was due to her that the somber Antari had learned to breathe easier.

“I’m not sure what you think I could possible do,” Kell said looking around the room, “I’m just going back for Rhy’s birthday, not heading into battle.”

“For one thing, there are still mercenaries after our precious king’s head.” Lila replied, “Then there’s the other kingdom’s leaders that aren’t too happy with Rhy’s negotiating skills. And let’s not forget the fact Alucard is still living in the palace.”

Kell stopped scanning the room and met Lila’s gaze. His two tone eyes striking her very core. She wouldn’t get used to that, she’d never get used to the power that seeped out of his solid black eye or the twinkling blue from his other. He smirked and then started to saunter towards her.

“I find it rather comical you’re warning me of doing something stupid. Which one of us entered Essen Tach untrained and underprepared?” 

Kell stopped right in front of her, his body close enough that she could reach up and grab him. Whether she wanted to embrace him or tie him to the ship was still undecided. 

He reached up and brushed her hair out of her face, his fingers lightly tracing her jaw.

Lila snorted in annoyance, and flicked his hand away. 

“Of course, that old crone had to call in her favor now.” Lila sighed ignoring the grin Kell shot her. “Was it too much to hope that the hag would have died or maybe forgotten completely?”

Kell shrugged and leaned further into her space, “From the stories I’ve heard, she very well might outlive both of us.”

Lila groaned and dropped her head onto his chest, “Great. So while you get to drink and party, I’m heading to my possible death.”

Kell’s body suddenly stiffened at her words, and he pushed Lila back by the shoulders so she could see the sudden seriousness that had killed the light in his eyes.

“Don’t you dare, Bard. If you die, I’m going to kill you.”

A flicker of power danced in his eyes, and she felt the room grow two degrees hotter. Lila couldn’t help but smirk. 

“You couldn’t kill me, Maresh. Not even if I was dead.” She taunted. She raised her chin up in a challenge, and Kell took the signal.

He grabbed her face with both hands and brought his mouth down into a fierce kiss. His well-earned calluses rubbed roughly against her cheeks, and Lila was suddenly struck with the urge to feel them everywhere. 

She turned them around so he was against the wooden planks of their door, and wrapped her arms around his neck, angling her head to deepen the kiss. 

He moved his arms and wrapped them around her waist, one of his hands moving to her back and under her shirt. She shivered at the touch, and now, more than anything, she wished that she could go with him to London. 

Out of sheer need for air, Lila started to draw back, pulling Kell’s bottom lip with her teeth before she took in breath. 

He was breathing hard in front of her, and when she met his gaze once more, his blue eye was blown wide open with desire.

“Just think about this, Lila,” Kell whispered to her, bringing his forehead down to hers, “I've done the impossible to bring my brother back. What do you think I’d do to bring you back?”

Lila felt a surge of emotion sweep through her, and she never really was one for words. So instead of saying anything, she just brought her mouth back to his. 

[addictedforbooksquad]

P I C K (S)  O F  T H E  M O N T H: M A R C H

Shades of Magic series by V. E. Schwab

Make Me Bad by R. S. Grey

Mistborn Trilogy by Brandon Sanderson

Devil in Winter by Lisa Kleypas

The Winner’s Trilogy by Marie Rutkoski

Text series by Teagan Hunter

Shades of Magic series by V.E. Schwab

Genres: Fantasy, Young Adult, Magic

Synopsis:

Kell is one of the last Antari—magicians with a rare, coveted ability to travel between parallel Londons; Red, Grey, White, and, once upon a time, Black. Kell was raised in Arnes—Red London—and officially serves the Maresh Empire as an ambassador, traveling between the frequent bloody regime changes in White London and the court of George III in the dullest of Londons, the one without any magic left to see. Unofficially, Kell is a smuggler, servicing people willing to pay for even the smallest glimpses of a world they'll never see. It's a defiant hobby with dangerous consequences, which Kell is now seeing firsthand. After an exchange goes awry, Kell escapes to Grey London and runs into Delilah Bard, a cut-purse with lofty aspirations. She first robs him, then saves him from a deadly enemy, and finally forces Kell to spirit her to another world for a proper adventure. Now perilous magic is afoot, and treachery lurks at every turn. To save all of the worlds, they'll first need to stay alive.

Why we love it:

thief turned pirate badass heroine

great premise with a storyline that felt very different

fabulous world-building with an interesting magic system

if you love London like us, there are four of them instead of one xD

full of morally gray characters!!!!!

don’t get attached to anyone

Trigger warnings: mind control, (mentions of) homophobia, character death

Make Me Bad by R.S. Grey

Genres: Romance, Contemporary, New Adult

Synopsis:

I was issued a warning: stay away from Ben Rosenberg. As Clifton Cove’s resident “king”, he thinks he’s entitled to anyone and anything. The trouble is, I’ve spent my whole life following the rules and playing it safe. I know what it feels like to be the good girl. I’m the police chief’s daughter and a librarian—for adorable children, no less. An all-nighter with a fictional hunk is about as exciting as my life gets until one day, fate decides to take pity on me and shove me straight into the path of Mr. Off-Limits himself. Just as I suspected, every inch of him promises to be my demise. Up close, he’s tall, menacing—a lawyer who looks like he’ll bite. A well-behaved girl would do as she’s told and avoid him at all costs, but I’m overdue for a little rebellion. So, I ignore the warning and throw caution to the wind. But Ben doesn’t just nudge me out of my comfort zone—he thrusts me into a dark corner and presses his hard body against mine, covering my mouth with his hand to ensure we don’t get caught sneaking around. In that moment, I finally understand why everyone thinks he’s going to ruin me. To him, this is all a game. He wants to tempt me with his dares and taunt me with his words. I should play along. After all, I asked him to make me bad. I just never thought he’d take his job quite so seriously...

Why we love it:

honestly the cutest thing ever

entertaining characters

friends to lovers done well

pretty angst-free (in a good way)

reading this book just makes you feel good

Trigger warnings: assault (one scene)

Mistborn Trilogy by Brandon Sanderson

Genres: Fantasy, High Fantasy, Adult

Synopsis:

In a world where ash falls from the sky, and mist dominates the night, an evil cloaks the land and stifles all life. The future of the empire rests on the shoulders of a troublemaker and his young apprentice. Together, can they fill the world with color once more? In Brandon Sanderson's intriguing tale of love, loss, despair and hope, a new kind of magic enters the stage — Allomancy, a magic of the metals.

Why we love it:

amazing world-building

unique and interesting magic system

lots of unexpected twists

the story follows different characters and their POVs

amazing, quality writing

Trigger warnings: violence, sexual assault (mentioned/suggested)

Devil in Winter by Lisa Kleypas

Genres: Romance, Historical Romance, Regency

Synopsis:

A Devil's Bargain Easily the shyest Wallflower, Evangeline Jenner stands to become the wealthiest, once her inheritance comes due. Because she must first escape the clutches of her unscrupulous relatives, Evie has approached the rake Viscount St. Vincent with a most outrageous proposition: marriage! Sebastian's reputation is so dangerous that thirty seconds alone with him will ruin any maiden's good name. Still, this bewitching chit appeared, unchaperoned, on his doorstep to offer her hand. Certainly an aristocrat with a fine eye for beauty could do far worse. But Evie's proposal comes with a condition: no lovemaking after their wedding night. She will never become just another of the dashing libertine's callously discarded broken hearts—which means Sebastian will simply have to work harder at his seductions... or perhaps surrender his own heart for the very first time in the name of true love.

Why we love it:

our favourite book from the Wallflower series

Sebastian with his fallen angel looks has amazing growth in this book and he isn’t quite the villain he led us to believe

Evie, our shy timid Wallflower really comes into her own in this book when she decides to take her future into her own hands with an offer that Sebastian can’t refuse

wickedly sexy dialogues

their chemistry is off the charts !!!

LK is the reigning Queen of historical romance

Trigger warnings: (mentions of) domestic violence

The Winner’s Trilogy by Marie Rutkoski

Genres: Fantasy, Young Adult, Romance

Synopsis:

Winning what you want may cost you everything you love... As a general’s daughter in a vast empire that revels in war and enslaves those it conquers, seventeen-year-old Kestrel has two choices: she can join the military or get married. But Kestrel has other intentions. One day, she is startled to find a kindred spirit in a young slave up for auction. Arin’s eyes seem to defy everything and everyone. Following her instinct, Kestrel buys him—with unexpected consequences. It’s not long before she has to hide her growing love for Arin. But he, too, has a secret, and Kestrel quickly learns that the price she paid for a fellow human is much higher than she ever could have imagined. Set in a richly imagined new world, The Winner’s Curse by Marie Rutkoski is a story of deadly games where everything is at stake, and the gamble is whether you will keep your head or lose your heart.

Why we love it:

angsty AF

awesome world-building

best character development

enemies to lovers trope YASSS

one of the best but underrated YA series

heroine who is written as both badass and feminine

Trigger warnings: slavery, violence, racism, attempted sexual assault

Text series by Teagan Hunter

Genres: Romance, Contemporary, New Adult

Synopsis:

A wrong number is supposed to be just that—a wrong number. Delete. Done. Do not continue to text. Do not flirt. A wrong number shouldn’t be the first person on your mind in the morning, or the last at night…and you’re definitely not supposed to talk them into buying a baby goat. Because that would be weird. When Zach Hastings and I get into a wrong-number mix-up, we don’t follow the rules. We keep texting and flirting, because he’s wicked funny and perfectly nerdy and a wonderful distraction. I’m not looking for love, and Zach definitely had the wrong number. But maybe… Maybe he’s the right guy.

Why we love it:

a series of four books but can be read as standalones

cute, funny and sexy aka the best romance combo

original formatting - lots of dialogue in text messages (which can be annoying to some but we found it refreshing)

roommates, second chance romance, forbidden romance - a mix of our fave tropes all in one series

Trigger warnings: n/a