#katya and the space barbie

[petrovna-zamo]

Love the new pod setup

[barbielore]

For the Barbie Role Models line (an extension of what was previously called the Sheroes line), every year Mattel releases a number of dolls in the likeness of various women who they consider deserving of praise and recognition, and to be held up as inspirational to young girls.

Most of these dolls are released as one of a kind releases that are given as gifts to the women they represent, though some have been released as more widespread collectors items as well.

For 2023, Mattel specifically honoured women in STEM, creating Barbies in the likeness of seven prominent women in STEM fields.

Three of these women were the Wojcicki sisters - Susan, the longterm CEO of YouTube, Anne, the co-founder and CEO of 23andMe, and Janet, Professor of Paediatrics and Epidemiology at University of California San Francisco.

Rounding out the list were Mexican science show host and electrical engineer, Katya Echazarreta, UK space scientist and space educator, Dr. Maggie Aderin-Pocock, German marine researcher and microbiologist Dr. Antje Boetius, and Chinese cofounder of ETU Education, Yinuo Li.

[braveclementine]

Dates and Depression

Warnings: 18+readersonly, mentions of smut/sex, angst

Copyright: I do not own any Marvel characters or locations. However, I do own my OCs, which consist of Penny Fury, Elizabeth Nelson, Elijah Chan, Katya Venice, Violetta Moscow, Lan Le, Josh, Trang Tien, Ahni Jallow, Mai Ito, and Ghaida Kashual as well as other OCs that will come up throughout the story.

Penny's date with Steve, Bucky, and Sam was not the only date that she ended up going on in the short time between the spy being found and Christmas. 

Steve, Bucky, and Sam took her to a gorgeous café restaurant. They stayed for almost two hours, before going through a strip mall that was putting up early Christmas decorations. Then they came home and went to bed together in hot, steamy sex. 

Natasha had been next to ask her on a date, but a few days before the actual date, she went into labor. It was a difficult one and Penny and Vision were very worried about her. They were also the only ones who were allowed to stay by her side. 

Natasha's body was not meant to be having children and it was only doing so because of magic. They ended up giving her a c-section, which meant a long time for recovery so they pushed the date backwards. 

Natasha and Visions' little girl was absolutely adorable. She had Natasha's flaming red hair, but had Visions eyes. Well, his human form eyes at the very least. She was named Anastasia Yelena Romanoff. 

Then Rhodey, who made good on his promise on giving her a wonderful date. They went to the movies which was doing old reruns and they watched The Wizard of Oz in the theaters. It was packed full of people who wanted to see the movie in the theaters for the first time. Since it was a cheap movie, they simply sold tickets and people sat in the aisles or on the stairs, anywhere there was space. 

The chairs were comfy though and Rhodey sat down, before pulling her in his lap and they cuddled the entire time. It was a movie experience that Penny had never been in before. People singing along to songs and cheering and yelling. 

Rhodey took her a restaurant afterwards where they just got dessert to split and share, cuddled up together on one side of the booth. Rhodey was even cheesy enough to feed her off of his spoon, but she loved it. Especially when she got to tease him, licking his finger as she did so and he turned red under his dark cheeks. 

When they got home, they went up to his room and spent the night together with almost no sleep, but a lot of satisfaction regardless. 

Loki took her up to Asgard for his one-on-one date. They strolled through the open markets while the normal citizens looked at Loki in awe and Penny in curiosity. Loki watched Penny and whatever she squealed over as beautiful or cute, he would either buy or sometimes haggle for. 

Penny would have scolded him for haggling, but realized that he haggled in normal things from Midgard, like Tony's tools, or Midgardian books. 

Loki explained as they walked, eating some sort of Asgardian dessert made of fruit and icing in a cone. "The people of Asgard long for things from Midgard. Odin may have lifted his rule of being in relationships with soulmates from Midgard and other realms, but there are still things that Midgardians have made that aren't allowed on Asgard." 

"Won't they get in trouble then?" Penny asked anxiously, looking over at two little girls that Loki had given barbie dolls to. They looked so happy to have them as well, running off with them into their house. 

"No." Loki said. "Odin is aware that we are visiting the markets. He will know that the Midgardian things came from us. Heimdall will also make sure that none of them suffer or are punished." 

With that comfort, Penny was able to relax more and even haggled some of her own possessions, which was actually quite fun. 

They did go back up to the castle for dinner, where she was able to see Fandral, Hogun, Volstagg, and Sif again and the six of them ate together and talked. 

"Heimdall is miserable." Fandral complained. "He needs a good fuck." 

Hogun chuckled but Sif rolled her eyes. 

"Yes, well, let him be a dumbass." Loki replied dryly. 

Fandral gasped in mock shock. "My word. The prince has used foul language!" 

Penny started to giggle while Loki glared daggers at Fandral. 

"Fair lady, come away from the uncouth man." Fandral declared and Penny giggled harder. Sif even cracked a smile while both Volstagg and Hogun laughed loudly. 

"I hope you don't value your hands Fandral." Loki said in a bored tone. "You're very close to losing them." 

Despite the bantering, that was the date where Penny ended up in Fandrals' room on Asgard in an orgy with the rest of them, Loki orchestrating most of what everyone did. It was definitely a turn on, watching all of these mighty warriors listen and follow Lokis' orders. Especially when it was for giving her pleasure. 

She had a variety of other dates with Tony and Stephen, then Violetta, then Clint and Bruce did a double date with her and Natasha, the four of them together as a square date. Pietro did one and then Wanda and Vision together. 

Elijah took her on a date after he was sure that Elizabeth was stable on her feet. The ice superhero had taken to being very secluded afterwards. Penny didn't blame her in the slightest, nor did she blame Elijah for putting all of his focus on her. 

She also became a little surprised when repeat people came back for dates and soon she was going on dates three or four times a week. 

She realized soon that a lot of their time had been sex and worrying about the spies and keeping each other safe. Now that the spy and the enemy was dead, there was time for relaxation and there was time for things like this. Going out without an entire crowd. Private dates, small things. Really getting to know each other. 

She definitely felt much more prepared as they started going into the Christmas season and they had to start looking for presents for each other. They went to the same mall that they had gone the first round. 

Penny found her presents much quicker this year, including presents for Bucky and Steve through what she had learned about them during the dates. 

They slowly started to regroup after an hour or two. She saw that Violetta and Katya were in line for Auntie Annes. Natasha and Wanda were just coming out of Dillards', a baby carrier in Natasha's hands with the cover pulled down so her baby was protected from sight. She refused to let the child out of her sight, no matter what. 

Penny herself had Chamber with her, mostly because it was his first Christmas and she wanted to show the mall around to him, even if he wouldn't remember it in years to come. 

She found Elizabeth in another shop, with a few presents, but definitely not enough for everyone. She looked overwhelmed and Penny immediately felt guilty for leaving her by herself. 

"Hey, you doing okay?" 

"Yeah. I wrote a list, I just don't know what stores hold which items." Elizabeth said, fingers fumbling as she pulled out a neatly written down list. She had crossed off for people she had the presents for. Penny also couldn't help but notice that Steve and Bucky's spaces were empty. 

"What do you get Steve and Bucky?" Elizabeth asked desperately. 

Penny found the irony humorous. Last year she was standing here asking Elizabeth what to get Steve and Bucky. Now the circumstances had been flipped. 

"Well, you usually get them something from their time period. Like last year you got them records- which are like song discs. You could probably ask Viden if there's anything in particular they're hoping for though." Penny offered. 

"Mm, maybe." Elizabeth said hesitantly and they moved on through the stores. 

Clint and Bucky took Penny out on another date for the Christmas holiday. It was bitterly cold, but Bucky was warm and they were inside most of the time anyways. 

It was turning to be one of the best years of her life. 

🏧🚪 𝐏ｏV ς𝓱άＮ𝕘𝕖 💥 🔥

Elizabeth's depression had hit an all time low. She had been feeling off ever since Steve had left her room and she knew that she still had the babies. The problem was, there was a little baby that was teetering on the edge of death. 

She had secretly seen a doctor about it with Katya, because Katya was the one that could keep all of her secrets from anyone, including Elijah. The doctor said she needed to eat plenty of food, keep her fluids up, and not do any strenuous activity, including sex, until cleared by her. 

Well, the last part was easy. She hadn't even seen anyone in the past four days besides Katya. She was keeping solely to her room except early mornings when no one was awake, to cook breakfast, or when F.R.I.D.A.Y. gave her the all clear and she would go and see her kids. 

She wasn't sure why she had sunk so low into depression. It was a state of feeling like she was constantly on the edge of crying or feeling nothing at all. Days passed easily, mostly because she just slept through all of them. 

She felt isolated from the others. She wasn't sure if she blamed it on Penny or the spy. But it felt like ever since the spy and her mother had been killed, that the others sort've stopped rallying around her. They had put all of their attention towards Penny and she suddenly felt like. . . like. . . like she had been loved on just because she needed protection. Now that the threat was gone, they didn't need to protect her anymore. 

Even Elijah hadn't been around. He had taken Penny out on three dates so far though. Elizabeth wondered when the last time he took her on a date was. 

But then again, she had always figured ever since she learned about this sort've thing, that it was just sex. The love was one sided. Go figure. 

At the same time, she had also purposely stayed away from them to stop herself from giving in to sex, so really, the isolation was her fault. But the isolation was still giving her anxiety and making her doubt. Even if the doubts were because she was keeping them away and not necessarily because they wanted to stay away. But she also felt that they were staying away, because they hadn't tried to see why she'd locked them out, and it was a whole complex cycle of psychological feelings and emotions. 

She did start having morning sickness, which was super fun. It also worried her and she went to another meeting with the doctor. The baby was a little more stable, but not by much and Elizabeth's blood pressure needed to come down, but she didn't have a way of not stressing. 

She tried reading, which would sometimes work. Sometimes she could lose herself in a good book. Until she would hit the romance part and everything just sort've seemed to crumble again. 

She started to research other things. Specifically about Cryo. If it would freeze the babies growing as well so that they could find a safe way to save her baby without her risking its' life. But there wasn't sufficient information on it to begin with. 

She didn't know what she was going to do. 

🍿👆 ᵖᗝ𝓥 Č𝒽卂𝓝ģＥ 🖕🍩

Penny laughed with the others at the stupidity of the movie. Well, except Katya who seemed to be in a bad mood. She had a notebook in her lap and was making marks in it, looking frustrated. Clint had picked up on her mood and was trying to look at the book, but every time he looked over, she snapped it closed. 

"Mr. Stark, Director Fury is here." F.R.I.D.A.Y. announced. 

"Uh huh." Tony said uncaringly, his head in Pennys' lap. Penny was stroking his hair while relaxing against Pietro. 

It was only two minutes later when her father came striding into the Community room, "Where's Elizabeth?" 

"Hi Dad, nice to see you too." Penny joked, earning laughs from the others around her- except Katya. 

Fury rolled his eye. "Elizabeth hasn't answered my text and I sent it four hours ago. I just-" 

Katya started to laugh. Except it was more bitter than that. "God, Fury, I love you." 

Everyone looked at her. 

"Four hours and you come check on her. Meanwhile, the last time anyone here has seen her was five days ago." Katya continued to smirk, standing up and grabbing the notebook she's been writing in. "Considering that, you might actually be able to get to see her." 

Fury raised an eyebrow and looked at the rest of them, who looked rather frozen in their seats all of a sudden. 

"Really?" Fury asked. "You're telling me that she's gone through a third traumatic experience and they still haven't learned from the first two in thinking she doesn't need any help?" 

"She doesn't need help." Katya replied scathingly. "In fact, she just thinks she was right about the whole thing, in thinking she was just this damsel in distress and now that the threats gone, she's not needed anymore." 

"That's not-" Bucky started but Katya turned on him. 

"You haven't even seen her in nine days James so just don't." 

 "Hey." Clint said, sounding hurt. "I saw her today and yesterday and the day before. I've been checking on her every day but recently she's always been asleep so I haven't gotten to talk to her." 

"How have you even been seeing her?" Katya grilled. "She coded F.R.I.D.A.Y. so only those with a certain password can even get in." 

"The vents." Clint said softly. 

"F.R.I.D.A.Y.-" Tony started but Katya bit into him next. 

"No." Katya snapped. "You don't get to override Elizabeth's command on F.R.I.D.A.Y. now. You can't just force yourself into her life after being out of it for sixteen days Anthony. None of you do. Except maybe Clint at this point." She turned back to Fury. "I'll go up with you. You'll need me for the password." 

Her and Fury left. Elijah was the next to leave, just jumping out the window and taking to the skies. Trang slipped out of the room next, slamming the door behind her to go to the lab. Violetta and Ghaida left next and Penny noticed Loki was suddenly gone as well. 

"Can you feel her?" Steve asked Wanda. 

"Yes." Wanda said softly. "She's. . . sort've just numb. She's stressed about something as well." 

"I'm going down to the gym." Bucky grunted, heading for the elevators. Natasha and Steve got up and joined him. 

And the rest of them just sat there in guilty silence as the movie continued to play on the screen.

[third-thepeacock]

Hello PEOPLEE

Because its a festive date I want to talk about one of my favorite AUs that I have just ended

I think I'm done with the AU planning and it's ready for the public!

Thanks to @primulatea and @shayden64 as they really helped me in the au

So now I show to you

PLAYROOM

AN EDDSWORLD AU

They all live in a single room full of wonders every kid would love, living as toys of every kind, from a piece of paper to the most fancy doll

Where is the kid? Who plays with them? Why are they alive? No one seems to know or care…

The Toys:

The Room:

They all live in a room made specially for kids. ABCs posters, planes and birds hanging from the ceiling, a bright lamp shining all over the room, a giant closet, a fancy desk,bright but calming wallpapers, colorful floor with a city carpet, a big fluffy bed, and a sofa bed with drawers below to look at the window, and so much more every kid wants!

If you look outside the window, natural provider of light, and indicator for night and day, you can observe a giant field of cotton and sunflowers, but is not the only thing visible, the sky and clouds, birds and bugs are visible too!

Some things have been modified for the toys accessibility because they are toy sized, but the furniture isn't. They have extra lego stairs, a big train track and car track for all over the room so they can travel fast, you name it

The room is divided depending on who or what is in there , so nothing is out of limits to no one. Some exampples, cotton valley or the creative plains

This toys are the one within the room, living at their fullest with every day.

Edd:

Jack in the box

Can get in n out of the box

Lives in the box

Troubadour

Ringo:

Calico critter cat

Edd's royal cat

Ell:

Rag Doll,1700 clothing style 

Tequila:

Long cat pillow

Ell’s mischievous cat

Matt:

Ken doll,prince version.

Matilda:

Barbie doll, princess version

Tord:

Anime figure

Has his own army but its more to protect the room

Tori:

Anime figure

Yeah works in the army too

Tom:

Porcelain doll in a sailor outfit

Has Tomme all around

Tomee is a tiny teddy bear

Tamara:

One girl band toy

Can put the instruments on and off

Eduardo:

Toreador

Kind of toxic.

Elena:

Monster High Doll (Lizard type of monster)

Mark:

Disco/Superstar Doll

Bright colors in a lot of ways

80s Style of clothing

Marcy:

Lalaloopsy

80’s style of clothing, sometimes more of a pastel vibe

Jon:

Playmobile small prince

He isn't a prince, he just has a crown. 

Joanna:

Polly Pocket Doll

Lives in her own small house and travels in it because going out normally could get her totally lost

Todd:

Nesting doll

Toni:

Precious Memories doll

Peace giver in the land

Paul:

Plastic soldier

Works for Tord

Grumpy man

Paula:

Bubbles blower

She uses the bubble wand as a cigarette and blows out bubbles instead of smoke

Works for Tord

Patryck:

Wind up toy

Works for Tord 

Likes coffee, its like extra winding up

Patricia:

Ballet Girl/Spinning top

Works for Tord

She can kick yo ass while twirling

Laurel:

Astronaut figure

Has a lot of tales about space almost no one believes

Lauren:

Parachute toy

Fearless of everything

His leg has been replaced by sticks many times.

Hellucard:

Wooden skeleton figure.

Hellen:

Race Car racer

Hot Wheels cars and remote control cars

Has all of her cars decorated

Bing:

Lego

 Likes making movies with his abilities

Beth:

Robot toy

She knows how to upgrade herself

Larry

Action figure

Gives Bing Ideas

Laura:

Pirate

She only steals things Beth tell her to

Don't ask her to say “yo ho ho” or “arrr”

Kim n Katya:

CareBears

They are physically attached, one hand to another

This is no inconvenience for them

They love each other dearly

Ken:

Sun inspired doll

Only comes out at day

Loves Kate but can almost never see him

Kate:

Moon inspired doll

Only comes out at night

Loves Ken but can almost never see him

Superguy:

Superhero figure

Fun dead kid:

Candy dispenser

The candy is suitable for humans somehow

Can't talk because of it

No one knows where he gets the candy

Zanta Claws

Old santa toy

It was destroyed mysteriously and it stays like that

Scribble Tom

Paper doll

Drawing in crayon, every movement looks like a frame in crayon

Realistic Matt

Plushie

Has a cartoony body and a realistic head

NFT(Not funny Tom)

Funko Pop

It is still in the box

…What else do you want, its nft

Torm

Face changing toy

Has a face for Tom, one for Tord and one for Torm

Can manage to use a yoyo but they keep fighting frequently so its hard to

Tomatoredd

Mix n’ Match toy

Every part changes everyday

That means there's days where they are mixed perfectly or 99% percent someone and 1% other

And for now thats it! I actually love this AU, I had it since forever but now I can actually show it. Maybe someone did this already? I dont know, but I really like my au(or my version of it unless). I will make designs soon! I just wanted to show the list first

Note:There are genderbends, and the non-official names are just my headcannons of names. You can refer to thm however you want. How to know what ellsworld character is each one? The direct genderbend is below the eddsworld character, Ell below Edd, Matilda below Matt, etc. I know this should be up the list but eh

There is no ships because , well, they are toys. No, my point is not that they dont need to be shipped, is, everyone plays differently with their toys, so why not with this ones? Everyone can ship whatever they want(.....Just. Don't include the fun dead kid or something. That not. Im going with whatever that isnt problematic). Will there be "official" ships? Maybe. But its up to the viewer to ship in their way.They are toys, not books, they have nothing assigned except for whatever one wants

A part I love too its that because there are hundreds of types of toys, and they can obviously be more than one of each type of toy, theres a lot of space for more toys! New characters, Ew OCs, old characters to bring again, so many things! It's a whole new world to expand, and I really love it

So yeah...I love this AU. Thank you to the people who helped me, Tea and SHayden

[recovery-within-the-iris]

Hello! Welcome to my blog!

This is a reblog side blog where I reblog a bunch of stuff I like based on fandoms/etc. It's just to gather stuff and give reblogs to some of my fave artists.

🍉 Get your daily click for Palestine!🍉

To note: I am critical of every media I'm interested in. So yes, I know this and that has a racist writer or that this and that has a bad scene in it. Im aware and I'm not defensive of the badness in the media and/or creator. If I deem it bad enough, I do not momentarily contribute to it. I am a conscious consumer and you should be too.

Underneath is a list of all the stuff ill probably reblog about one day or another!

Things ill be reblogging!

(Stuff with a 👑 are my current hyperfixations)

Undertale aus/utmv/sans aus 👑

Skyrim👑

Markiplier

Game grumps👑

My hero academia

Fnaf 👑

Steven universe

Sonic

Vocaloid

Monster high

Dnd/dungeons and dragons 👑

Soul eater

Saw

Beetlejuice

My little pony

Bratz

Love nikki

Creepypasta

Unus annus

Scp

Among us

Danganronpa

Transformers

Animal crossing

Pokemon

Encanto/beauty and the beast/mulan/a few other disney stuff (no im not a Disney adult)

Tf2

Mario bros

Atla

Minecraft

Life is strange

Good mythical morning👑

Dragon ball z

Unhhhh/trixie mattel/ katya

Overwatch

Sims 4

Panty and stocking

Another

Spirited away

Ponyo

Positivity/affirmations

When marine was there

Pirates of the Caribbean( istandwithamberheard)

The conjuring

Insidious

Annabelle

Little nightmares

Until dawn

Man of medan

House of ashes

Choo choo charles

Zombieland saga

A centaurs life

In space with markiplier

Fandoms i like but dont feel NEARLY informed enough to say im into them BUT youll still see their content here

Scooby doo

It

Halloween

Friday the 13th

The boy

The ring

Ever after high

Chucky

Hellraiser

Scream

A nightmare on elm street

The texas chainsaw massacre

Cult of the lamb

The devil in me

The quarry

Subway surfers

Yugioh

Bendy and the ink machine

Raft

The forest

Pixie hollow

Barbie

South park(im incredibly critical)

Winx club

Welcome home

I do not always approve of every artist I reblog from. If I did, I'd get no utmv art because of the sheer amount of proshippers in that community 🤢

[artificialqueens]

Katya and The Space Barbie (Trixya)- Squeaky

Number one reason not to buy a sex doll from a sketchy, space shop— she might come to life.

(AN: really short, smutty one shot)

The galaxy is infinite, and Katya’s horny.

Those two thoughts aren’t related, but they occur to her at the same time. The spaceship is lightly vibrating because Katya’s running low on fuel; the vibrations aren’t helping her growing state of arousal. In fact, it’s getting harder and harder to think. The safety straps around her waist and chest are tight, and the reminder of how she’s strapped down makes her squirm against the hard leather.

Katya’s sure she took a left turn at the milky way before hitting accelerate. Or…did she? The directions blur together, and her navigation system took a hit. How am I going to make it back to Mother Ship now? Ask?!

“Uh, this is Captain Zamo from Sputnik reporting in to Headquarters. I’m operating a craft without navigation. Do you copy? Over?”

“Yes, I copy. Are you lost, Captain Obvious? Over.”

Katya internally groans at the sarcastic drawl of Alaska’s voice. Great, if she wanted a tongue lashing, she’d have dialed up her mother. Now, she needs to ask for Alaska Thunder’s help. God, there had never been any other girl at Ru’s Space Academy who gave her shit like Alaska.

“I’m not lost, ‘Lasky, just not…spatially coordinated. Over.”

“That’s the definition of lost. Over.”

“I’m lost when I say I’m lost, which I’m not. Lost that is. And aren’t we all existentially lost in the scale of this never ending universe splattered with stars and sperm? Over.”

Silence.

Katya sighs and presses the voice command: “I’m lost.”

“I’ll see what I can do, Captain. Hmmm….says here you’re approaching Planet Booberella. I’m sure you’ve been there before? Over.”

“Never,” Katya lies and then flushes as she realizes she forgot to say ‘over.’

Wow, way to be obvious, Katya.

“Well, I’m sure there’s a, uh, first time for everything. Pull over for fuel and directions. Over.”

She types in the coordinates for Planet Booberella. It’s infamous for well…boobs and bombs. The women and men there are just as likely to blow you for a copper piece as they are to blow you to pieces for the wrong word.

Katya hesitates before pressing the intercom: “Bets on if I’ll get fucked or sold into space slavery? Over.”

“Bet you’ll meet an alien girl and fuck her over so bad she’ll sell herself. Conversation- OVER.”

Katya bites her lip.

Is Alaska still mad about that whole date thing? Probably. They’d ditched the food and went straight back to her Cube for ‘dessert.’ Katya remembers how she’d pushed Alaska onto her knees. God, Alaska looked so pretty, still in her spandex uniform, with her face buried between Katya’s thighs. They’d fucked on the bed and couch and table. Alaska had come apart so easily under her fingertips. While Katya hasn’t been back to her Cube in months, she bet that Alaska’s ripped up uniform is still there.

“Thanks for the help, Coordinator Thunder. Any chance for another dinner when I get back? I can’t cook, but I could microwave us some popcorn…think about it? Watch the Cult Classic Contact? Over.”

Silence.

Well, losing friends and herself in space is kind of Katya’s specialty. Sputnik’s sput-sputtering down, and Katya’s not going to bother legally landing. She zooms down to one of the Black Market Pods to get herself situated in Tittington. Fuck, why is this whole planet a bad sex pun? It’s the biggest joke in the cosmos.

Katya jumps out, breasts bouncing in her shiny suit. It’s skin tight. Just the way that she likes it. All five of the mechanic’s eyes trail down to her chest as she slides him her platinum card.

“Oi, I’d be careful going out with ‘em bullets on yer chest,” he drawls.

“You want one less eye, huh?” Katya asks as she runs her hand down her thigh to grab her lazor gun and then presses it to his throat.

The mechanic puts his webbed hands up: “Peace, peace. I’ll be done refueling and patching up in an hour. Looks like the engine’s on its last leg.”

“Do a good job, and I’ll give you a tip,” she promises, and Katya regrets her words as soon as she turns. She can feel all five eyes against the curve of her ass. Katya leaves in a huff. Doesn’t anyone in this galaxy have a heart?

“Hearts! Hearts for sale! Buy three and get a kidney for free!” An old lady, porous skin covered in green ooze, wheezes up at Katya.

She flinches. Ugh, it’s like Miss. Fame used to say back at the Academy- ask and the universe will give.

Katya amuses herself by stopping by a hologram store and flipping through the intergalactic net. She gained six new followers on her travel blog. Then Katya goes next to the local, seedy sex shop.

It’s full of gadgets and gizmos that have been scattered all over and somehow filtered down here. The shopkeeper, a cute drag queen named Violet, winks at her when she enters. They’d met and fucked the first time she’d got here, and Katya had never been held down so tightly or fucked so thoroughly as she had with Violet. Katya leans against the counter-

“So what you got in stock, V?”

“Oh, possessed butt plugs, ancient dildos, and…I shouldn’t be showing you this but…” Violet bounces to the back and comes back with what looks like a Barbie Doll box. Katya’s spent enough years in her childhood watching reruns to recognize it. But what’s it doing in a place like this?

“I’ve heard of a lot of fetishes, doll…but never any involving barbie dolls?”

Katya takes the package in her hands. This doll has big blonde hair up in a pigtail and a Judy Jetson hooker-like costume. What is even supposed to be? A flight attendant? Katya turns the box over and reads ’Here To Satisfy Your Wildest Fantasy- it’s Trixie! Your favorite sex Barbie proves that life in plastic IS really fantastic.’

“It’s small for travel convenience,“ Violet explains. “But press the button in the back, and it blows up. She’s got interchangeable parts for maximum pleasure- since Barbies don’t have any. I just got it in stock, so I don’t know what the reviews are.”

“So I’m like…your test rat?”

“Mm, more like a sexual experiment,” Violet says with a wink.

Katya is horny, but she’s never tried out a sex doll before. From what’s heard of online, they usually come with a remote control, but the Trixie doll doesn’t have any. 

Violet puts her hands on Katya’s: “What do you say? Buy it now, leave me a sweet review on Yelp, and I’ll give you 50% discount, Kat.”

Katya does like the novelty of getting a souvenir from Booberella. Maybe Alaska will get a laugh out of it too…if she ever speaks to her again.

“You know what? I’ll take it." 

Katya pulls out a couple gold coins from her back pocket. She’s glad Booberella is part of the galactic union. It makes buying sex toys all the more convenient. Violet bites down to check that they’re not fools gold and then sends her off with a wink.

Katya’s pleased to see that five-eyed-creep has taken good care of her Sputnik. He leers at her and then the doll pressed up to her chest. God, I’m horny but not blind. 

She salutes the planet with a middle finger as she zooms off. 

Then she’s back on course for the Mother Ship. Katya sets the ships destination and leaves it for auto pilot. She’s still tightly strapped into her seat as she swivels her chair around to inspect the doll she bought. Katya gently runs her hands across the plastic casing. 

"Hello, there, Trixie,” she whispers. “Now, let’s see how you look outta the box.”

Katya tries to be neat, but she ends up tearing it open. Looks like a Barbie that she saw in the kiddie holograms. She never had one when she was little, so Katya takes a moment to run her hands through her soft, blonde hair. Skin’s tight and plastic. Katya flips up the white skirt, but it’s smooth- neither cunt nor cock to be seen. 

She undoes the velcro of the back of doll’s dress to find a switch. It’s OFF right now. Does she really want to do this? Maybe just to say that she tried it.

Katya slowly undoes her seat belt, sucks in her breathe, and presses ON. 

There’s a mechanical 'whirring,’ and the doll gets so hot in her hands Katya drops it.

Fuck!

There’s a bright white flash, smoke, and Katya’s bent over, coughing. 

“Thank god someone got me out of that box,” comes a voice from the mist. 

“W-who are you?”

“The voice of god- who the fuck do you think it is? I��m the sex doll you just bought and turned on. Though gods know why considering my line’s been recalled,” a humanoid figure parts the white. “Name’s Trixie. Mattel. Trixie Mattel.”

“Uh, Katya. Zamo. Captain of Sputnik and- what do you mean recalled?”

If Katya was low key aroused before, now her nipples are pressed against the tight latex of her uniform. Trixie’s got thighs like woah!, flirty eyes, and lips that should be illegal. There’s something eerily android-like about her movements, but the thought only turns Katya on more. 

“Mhm, seller musta ripped you off.”

Fuck Violet.

“W-what do you mean? Are you broken?”

“Rude,” Trixie simpers as she stands between Katya’s spread legs. “I mean that’s why they say- our line is prone to uh…malfunctioning?”

“In what way?” she gasps as Trixie drapes herself on her lap. Katya runs a hand up her smooth thighs, admiring how shiny they are. When Trixie giggles, her silicone breasts bounce. They may be fake, but Katya really wants to slide her hands up and squeeze them. But even with Trixya leaning forward against her chest, Katya feels strangely shy. That’s new. 

“We’re self conscious. Can pass the Turning Test. Hate to be turned off and put away….and,” Trixie dramatically pauses as she leans in. “Known to have something as horrible as feelings.”

“Are you telling me a planet called Booberella accidentally created sentient life before anyone else in the galaxy?”

“That’s exactly what I’m saying.”

“But,” Katya gulps as Trixie cups her face in her cold hands. “H-how’d you know all this? I just took you out of the box?”

Trixie’s lips are pressed up to Katya’s lips as she whispers, “This isn’t my first game of make believe.”

Of course Katya ends up with a sentient fucking sex toy. Trixie smirks at her horrified expression as she straddles her lap. Those thick thighs have a rubbery texture, and Katya’s not sure what to expect when Trixie impishly raises up her skirt. There’s…nothing?

“Tell me which you prefer,” Trixie demands. “I’m trying to follow the steps I was programmed with- one, assess owner. Two, satisfy needs. 

"Both? Either? Uh….”

Trixie rolls her eyes: “Problem with assessing is when people don’t know what they want. Let’s start slow and then I’ll give you what you need, baby.”

Baby? The words make Katya flush and squeeze her legs together as Trixie pulls her in for a kiss. Her lips are glossy and soft. She tastes like cherry lip gloss. It doesn’t feel much different from kissing Alaska. 

Trixie unzips her uniform, so Katya’s heavy breasts are revealed. Then her wet tongue is lapping at them. Katya squeaks and clenches at the sudden pleasure. Everything’s gone from 0 to 100 real quick. Trixie’s pink tongue slowly circles her nipples, and Katya flushes as she runs her hand through Trixie’s soft hair. 

“A-ah, Trixie, fe-feels-”

“Good?” Trixie finishes for her, pulling back so a strand of saliva still connects her to Katya. “I’m state of the fucking art. Just filled with crippling, existential dread.”

Katya gasps- “Me too!”

Trixie tilts her head, confused, as she leans back. Her eyes are filled with a curiosity that doesn’t seem natural to the rest of her. Katya didn’t know what she expected, but it’s not this. This is straight out of a TV show. Straight out of a science fiction novel. Straight out of a poorly set up porno. 

“So you don’t mind the idea that I’m filled with anxiety and neurosis and could disobey you? Put you over my knee and spank you just because I wanted?”

Katya bites her bottom lip and gasps, “S-sounds kinky to me.”

Trixie smirks: “You’re a fun one, huh?”

Then she sinks down onto her knees, and Katya hasn’t had anyone since Alaska. So the sudden tickle of Trixie’s fingertips against her still covered thighs makes her gasp. Katya’s wriggles out of her uniform, flushing under Trixie’s eyes. She’s not wearing any underwear.

“Such a good little captain, aren’t you?” Trixie demurs as she presses a fleeting kiss right above Katya’s wet desire. She’s been on space Odyssey for a month, so she’s not as neatly shaved as she’d like to be. But Trixie doesn’t seem to mind. Why would she?

“Oh, so how do I, uh-”

“Open your legs,” Trixie orders with a snap of her fingers. 

Fuck. Katya’s eyes flutter at the direct command, and it sends a sudden shiver up her spine. She loves to be told what to do like that. She’s always commanding her ship, so it’s nice to have someone else take the control away from her. Katya never thought a recalled barbie doll would be the one to do it for her. 

Then Trixie’s burying her blonde head between Katya’s thighs. Her tongue’s lapping at Katya’s wet folds. She whimpers. Katya runs her hands through Trixie’s hair again, and, wow, this feels real. It is real, isn’t it?

“I-I’ve ne-never met someone like you,” Katya gasps.

“You’re not really the type who usually buys a sex toy.”

“I’m glad I did,” Katya admits, flushing at the vulnerability, as Trixie looks up at her through her long lashes. The wetness of Trixie’s tongue has her leaking all over her Captain’s chair. Her toes curl in her space boots, waiting for more. 

“Your better than the last one,” Trixie says, and her eyes are softer than before. She leans up to press a kiss against Katya’s lips. She squirms in her seat, and Katya needs something more. 

“Trixie,” Katya gasps, unsure what’s she even asking for.

“Shhh, I got'chu, baby,” Trixie whispers. 

There’s a soft whirring and when Trixie lifts up her skirt again, there’s a toy strap there. Katya wants to try out all her functions, but she bites her lip at the sight of the phallic toy. Trixie roughly pushes her around, so Katya’s turned and pressed up to her chair. She holds the safety straps, arching her back in anticipation. 

Then Trixie’s pushing inside of her, and Katya mewls in pleasure. She’s been on edge, humming with low arousal all day. Finally, Trixie’s got a hand wrapped in her hair and is moving into her just like she needs. 

“There you go, Captain Zamo,” Trixie whispers in her ear as she fucks her, speeding up her pace. 

“A-ah,” Katya moans.

It’s the position in her chair, and the way Trixie’s pulling her hair as she fucks her that pushes Katya over the edge. With a whimper, Katya squeezes her thighs together. The liquid spills down her shaking thighs.

Oh, god, she loves how helpless she is. 

Trixie pulls out of her and whispers: “Again, Captain?”

“F-fuck yeah.”

Katya’s horny, and the universe is so wonderful. This is exactly what she wanted. 

[homobiwan]

check please fic recs time

Ever read fics that are dreamy, gentle, and sweet but also slowly twist a knife between your ribs the more you read? Yeah.

Precarity by @lilacborrower

T-rated, nurseydex, 5.4k, complete

Nursey, a professional ballet dancer, meets technician Dex for the first time at a motion-capture shoot for the animated movie Barbie in the 12 Dancing Princesses. Working together is essential for a smooth production and a high-quality film. Everyone on set needs to do their job perfectly.

Naturally, Nursey promptly trips over several very important cables.

Feat. miscommunications, personal growth, criticism of capitalism, and a mental breakdown that’s almost poetic to read.

Screaming at the sky by @bittysthesis

M-rated, pimms, 21.7k, WIP

Kent Parson and Jack Zimmermann from start to finish.

Juniors era.

Full disclosure, I was a beta reader for this fic, but I think that just makes me even more qualified to tell you how good it is. This fic portrays Jack and Parse’s relationship during Juniors perfectly, including the soft moments that make you want a happy ending and all the messy mistakes and loose strings that remind you what’s coming.

white flower oil by @stanthefrogs

T-rated, Chowder/Caitlin, 8.1k, complete

Caitlin falls sick and Chris worries.

Feat. anxiety, loneliness, the odd space of life called college, and the realization that you are not only known but also cherished.

a life of our own by @parseisflat

T-rated, Katya/Georgia, 5.2k, complete

George shaves her head to escape the suffocation of having long hair. Katya follows suit.

written for the prompt: 2 butches shaving each others heads <3 getting cold heads in the winter is worth it for the tenderness of ur partner buzzing ur hair over the bathroom sink :)

Feat. gender realizations, the inherent intimacy of touching another person’s hair, and finding yourself through your reflection in other people’s eyes.

Forever and ever with(out) you by @tingo-tango

T-rated, nurseydex, 2.3k, complete

Nursey couldn’t put his finger on it, but looking at Dex now after all these years (years spent longing for something he couldn’t have), Nursey still sees the man he fell in love with.

Feat. growing up and moving on, despite yearning for the past.

Isn’t It Just So Pretty by @omg-whiskey

M-rated, whiskent, 18.6k, complete

Kent Parson and Gender.

You know how after you come out, you start thinking back and you come up with a bunch of moments that at the time should have made things obvious? These are Kent Parson's

This fic made my stomach hurt. In a good way but also in a Wow I Am Trans way.

In Another Life by @alocalband

M-rated, nurseydex, 21.1k, complete

Dex goes to bed his first night in the basement and wakes up in a slightly altered version of reality for the day.

A few nights later, it happens again. And again. And again...

Which is fine. Really. He will handle this insanity the same way he’s handled every other weirdness Samwell has thrown at him since he got here.

He’s just not sure how to deal with the implications of how often he wakes up in worlds where Nursey is in bed beside him.

Feat. learning to love vs. realizing you always did.

[glubbity]

just got reminded of that trixya fic where trixie is a space barbie and katya is a pilot

[krista-gallacher]

Who are You Object and location research

NIGEL SPREADBURY

Nigel  spreadbury. Is a professional photographer who does location photography. Specializes on site. Photographs of buildings. Trucks and cars. He can also do videos. Through his time, Nigel has worked with engineers, architectures and companies for still use half an hour of his time too. Check out the place, see where the best shots and lighting is. He says it's quite a challenge sometimes with UK weather. To get the correct shop, but will juggle with dates to get it

As you can see with this black and white photo over stairwell is quite creative in their lighting is brilliant. The tones of the lighting really help show the depth and the stairs and how high up it goes. It also creates interesting symmetrical shapes within the portal. The way it goes up but gets so even smaller as It goes up. Quite confusing for the eye but Brilliant.

And in this one of the House dining room slash kitchen. It has some brilliant lighting that comes through the Conservatory windows and reflects off on the floor. I think this gives it a place to draw your eye to the middle of the room and helps look around the page with it. The colors of the hose match well together. Nice muted tones that look quite relaxing.

Still life photography

Katya Havok

is  a contemporary pop art photographer. Are still life images contain lots of bright colors and? Imaginative scenes. She focuses a lot on minimalism and surrealism to create her photos. her images give off a very summary feel to them as they are all really bright pinks, yellows and greens and purples. These are all colors that quite often are put into summer. there's hardly any Blacks within any of our images. They're all very pop art. She aldo tends to use summer related objects.

This image above focuses a lot on the cooler colors within her portfolio. There are some yellows and pinks Majority of the colors in this photo are Blues and greens. I think these works well together as it gives it a refreshing look towards the photo. The leaves suddenly full tour our lakes. Tropical palm leaves. And it's got three sets of sunglasses within it. It's a very. Hott but cold photo.

And then this other photo, it gives off a really summer vibe to it. Hinted by the Pink Pool Floaty with the Barbie doll in a swimsuit on it. The bright pink really catches your eyes and is the first thing it drawn too. This Photo is really minimalistic as it has only a few. Mean elements to it and a lot of negative space around the floaty. Blues are nice toned down. Relaxing color, in contrast to the bright neon pink float. Overall, I really like this image.

[shesthesapphicqueen]

7. Trixie Mattel, All Stars 3

💄💄💄

Oh honey. Hoooneeeey. HOOOOOONEEEEEYYYYYY.

So honestly, on Season 7 I did not like Trixie. I wasn’t a fan of her makeup, I didn’t think she was that funny, and I thought she was severely overrated by the fans. It was after season 7, specifically with her and Katya’s show UNHhhh that she began to grow on me. This is when I first saw her going full out with her insane makeup, which I preferred over the toned down version she presented on Season 7. UNHhhh is also where I really got to see her dry, dark sense of humor showcased, which again, I hadn’t seen on the show, and thoroughly enjoyed.

The more I’ve seen Trixie on the show, on All Stars, in interviews, etc. the more I realized how similar our personalities are. She’s reserved and blunt with a dark sense of humor and issues with personal space, but a loud mouthed maniac around her friends? She is me, and I am her. Plus as a Sapphic Queen™️ myself, I believe I am morally obligated to stan Trixie—I don’t make up the rules. All in all, I absolutely LOVE Trixie now, and wish this Barbie Girl all the success in the world!

[hellomehlo]

Get To Know Me Tag!

It me - time for me to answer some questions!

1. what is your full name?: Emily (that’s all I’m gon’ share :D) 2. what are your nicknames?: Em 3. birthday?: november 2nd 4. what is your favorite book series?: A Court of Thorns and Roses series 5. do you believe in aliens or ghosts?: ghosts kinda sorta maybe? 6. who is your favorite author?: Sarah J Maas for ever and ever 7. what is your favorite radio station?: i don’t listen to the radio ha 8. what is your favorite flavor of anything?: Mint - spearmint, peppermint anything is yummmm 9. what word would you often use to describe something great or wonderful?: noice 10. what is your current favorite song?: the entire les miserables 10th anniversary dreamcast soundtrack 11. what is your favorite word?: yeet 12. what was the last song you listened to?: Prologue from Les Mis 10th Anniversary dreamcast soundtrack 13. what tv show would you recommend for everyone to watch?: Brooklyn Nine Nine and Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt 14. what is your favorite movie to watch when you’re feeling down?: Barbie movies (don’t judge me pls) 15. do you play video games?: yes 16. what is your biggest fear?: losing someone I love 17. what is your best quality, in your opinion?: uh, I’m optimistic? 18. what is your worst quality, in your opinion?: Perfectionism. 19. do you like cats or dogs better?: Don’t make me pick (but dogs probs) 20. what’s your favorite season?: summer 21. are you in a relationship?: nope. 22. what is something you miss from your childhood?: Being little enough to sit on my dad’s shoulders 23. who is your best friend?: One girl from my dance class - we’re both huuuuge theatre nerds 24. what is your eye color?: blue 25. what is your hair color?: reddish brown 26. who is someone you love? My ma 27. who is someone you trust?: see 26 28. who is someone you think about often?: see 26 29. are you currently excited about/for something?: I get to move interstate for university in a few weeks and I’m v excited 30. what is your biggest obsession?: Musical Theatre 31. what was your favorite tv show as a child?: Hi-5 32. who of the opposite gender can you tell anything to, if anyone?: My dad, I guess 33. are you superstitious?: A bit 34. do you have any unusual phobias?: what counts as unusual tho, idk probably not. Spiders are a pretty normal phobia? 35. do you prefer to be in front of the camera or behind it?: in front of the camera 36. what is your favorite hobby?: singin’ 37. what was the last book you read?: Clockwork Angel by Cassandra Clare 38. what was the last movie you watched?: Moonraker - James Bond 39. what musical instruments do you play, if any?: Piano, Violin, Guitar and Voice 40. what is your favorite animal?: Llamas (duh) 41. what are your top 5 tumblr blogs that you follow?: @gerbits @allieice @darlingimmafangirl @lemonywaffles​ @suddenlycowplants 42. what superpower do you wish you had?: The ability to manipulate rainbows 43. when and where do you feel most at peace?: On a holiday I went on recently to Indonesia, watching the sun set on a beach 44. what makes you smile?: The Trixie and Katya Show 45. what sports do you play, if any?: I dance :) 46. what is your favorite drink?: fruit smoothies 47. when was the last time you wrote a hand-written letter or note to somebody?: this morning - had to remind my brother to check his phone ‘cause I went out while he was still asleep 48. are you afraid of heights?: I’m not afraid of being up high, but I’m afraid of falling 49. what is your biggest pet peeve?: PEOPLE THAT USE INCORRECT GRAMMAR 50. have you ever been to a concert?: yes 51. are you vegan/vegetarian?: I’m like...a selective vegetarian. 52. when you were little, what did you want to be when you grew up?: A pop star, just like Hannah Montana 53. what fictional world would you like to live in?: Either Prythian from ACoTaR, or the Overwatch universe.  54. what is something you worry about?: EVERYTHING 55. are you scared of the dark?: yes 56. do you like to sing?: I do indeedy 57. have you ever skipped school?: Never by choice - but doctors and dentists love scheduling appointments in the middle of the school day grr grr 58. what is your favorite place on the planet?: in a theatre 59. where would you like to live?: Melbourne, or LA (I know it sounds cliche, but like kinda) 60. do you have any pets?: I used to have a fat goldfish but he died, aged 11 years old ;-; 61. are you more of an early bird or night owl?: night owl 62. do you like sunrises or sunsets better?: sunset 63. do you know how to drive?: Well I can legally and physically drive a car, but uh - I’ve been too busy in life to take my test, so I guess I’ll be on my Learner’s forever -_- 64. do you prefer earbuds or headphones?: depends on my mood 65. have you ever had braces?: yeaaaah, back in middle school 66. what is your favorite genre of music?: MUSICAL THEATRE 67. who is your hero?: my mum 68. do you read comic books?: no 69. what makes you the most angry?: PEOPLE USING BAD GRAMMAR 70. do you prefer to read on an electronic device or a real book?: real book 71. what is your favorite subject in school?: music, or the school musical 72. do you have any siblings?: yeh, one younger brother 73. what was the last thing you bought?: Online: a phone case that says ‘oh honey’ on the back (Trixie Mattel where u @ gurlllll) IRL: Oats 74. how tall are you?: 5′7 75. can you cook?: not to save my life, but I need to learn before i move away fml 76. what are three things that you love?: musical theatre, RuPaul’s Drag Race and Overwatch 77. what are three things that you hate?: stress, homophobia, the fact that they cancelled Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt after 4 seasons ;-; 78. do you have more female friends or male friends?: female 79. what is your sexual orientation?: straight/heterosexual 80. where do you currently live?: Australiaaaaaa 81. who was the last person you texted?: My group of theatre nerd friends 82. when was the last night you cried?: like a week ago when I went to a production of Les Mis starring heaps of my friends and I was so proud I cried 83. who is your favorite youtuber?: vixella/heyimbee 84. do you like to take selfies?: yeah! 85. what is your favorite app?: snapchat, youtube or netflix, can’t pick. 86. what is your relationship with your parent(s) like?: my mom is the best, and so is my dad! 87. what is your favorite foreign accent?: American, but that’s cause I have to use one for just about every musical I’m in 88. what is a place that you’ve never been to, but want to visit?: HARRY POTTER WORLD IN LA 89. what is your favorite number?: 8 90. can you juggle?: kinda, but not well enough to brag 91. are you religious?: idk at this point, kinda but not fully idk 92. do you find outer space or the deep ocean to be more interesting?: ocean - space scares me 93. do you consider yourself to be a daredevil?: fuck no 94. are you allergic to anything?: dust 95. can you curl your tongue?: mhm! 96. can you wiggle your ears?: no 97. how often do you admit that you were wrong about something?: I should more often than I do 98. do you prefer the forest or beach?: beach 99. what is your favorite piece of advice that anyone has ever given you?: You do you, girl. 100. are you a good liar?: I think I am, but my friends disagree 101. what is your hogwarts house?: Ravenclaw 102. do you talk to yourself?: yep 103. are you an introvert or extrovert?: ambivert 104. do you keep a journal/diary?: i’ve had one since I was 7, but I only write in it like once every 2 years 105. do you believe in second chances?: depends 106. if you found a wallet full of money on the ground, what would you do?:  turn it in 107. do you believe people are capable of change?: yes 108. are you ticklish?: absolutely, but don’t do it 109. have you ever been on a plane?: yeah 110. do you have any piercings?: my ears are pierced 111. what fictional character do you wish was real?: RHYSAND FROM ACOTAR, GIMME GIMME 112. do you have any tattoos?: no, and don’t plan on getting any 113. what is the best decision that you’ve made in your life so far?: moving dance schools 114. do you believe in karma?: yes 115. do you wear glasses/contacts?: no 116. do you want children?: haven’t decided, probably tho 117. who is the smartest person you know?: my teachers 118. what is your most embarrassing memory?: tripping up the stairs onto a stage on my way to receive an award 119. have you ever pulled an all-nighter?: no 120. what color are most of your clothes?: navy blue, burgundy, black 121. do you like adventures?: sometimes 122. have you ever been on tv?: i’ve appeared on the news in advertisments for musicals I’m in, but I’ve never been interviewed ;-; 123. how old are you?: 18 124. what is your favorite quote?: “fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Fool me three times...you’re a fucking idiot, change off widowmaker, I don’t wanna be sniped anymore.” - Muselk 125. do you prefer sweet or savory foods?: savoury

[moonduskt]

BOOK TWO: Trixie and Katya’s Guide to Modern Womanhood

“Trixie and Katya’s Guide to Modern Womanhood”

Author: Trixie Mattel and Katya Zamolodchikova

Year: 2020

Publisher: Penguin Randomhouse

Note: Possible spoilers, for those who’s uncomfortable with them please read the novel first, okay? Thank you.

I have an endearing little problem in life. Amusing enough to make me chuckle and save it on my phone’s memory, yet also more than enough to annoy me to no end. 

My juniors at uni like to call me a Boomer these days, or  an old lady, whichever is best used in the moment; they cackle and giggle and tease me fondly. All of that because I consciously seldom myself from the madness of social media. That way, whenever they’re talking about something viral and the most important news of the day, or latest meme and high-charted funny song, I never, ever, understand any of them in full context. That is how they start with their old woman jokes. 

So I, in my early twenty years of age, need to find a way to prove to them that I am not the old hag they accuse me of. A modern woman with impeccable taste, a futuristic and visionary one if possible. Hence, the moment I have a hold of Trixie Mattel and Katya Zamolodchikova’s “Trixie and Katya’s Guide to Modern Womanhood”, I read it as soon as possible like it is my only Bible to the future.

(No, I’m just half joking. I read the book because I love Trixie Mattel and Katya Zamolodchikova, too, from the north pole to the south pole and back to the north pole again.)

As the title suggests, “Trixie and Katya’s Guide to Modern Womanhood” is a guidebook, or a life-advice book, for the women (but not limited to men) to be the baddest modern woman out there, ready to tackle the society’s expectation successfully. Written in various methods, the book is divided into three important parts: beauty and style, homemaking, and relationships.

As you may guess, through the ‘Beauty and Style’ part, Trixie and Katya told us how to be dazzlingly beautiful from the physical realm until the inner self-love we all need in order to achieve it successfully. From the basics such as hair, makeup, heels, personal style, and  personal hygiene, to the side-quests we need to be aware of like alcohol, drugs, and most importantly self love. Presented in an advice columns, a questionnaire, bullet points, and even a short essay of their own experience meticulously, we would be the shining, shimmering, and splendid pretty women (and men) ready to face the world by the time we turned the page for the second part of the book.

It turns out that being beautiful inside and outside simply isn’t enough to be a modern woman according to these two biological women. We need to be knowledgeable in our home affairs too, especially money concerned matters, because it is very expensive to survive in this world as a woman. Another important thing we need to be masterful of is our kingdom of digital platforms. How to put out the correct persona on the internet and manage it carefully to avoid any unwarranted problems because of the internet’s unforgiving harsh judgement, and most importantly how to take a rest from the madness of it for some time, the world that never sleeps.

I feel like I resonated through this chapter so much. I used to be a very active user of social media platforms, especially twitter. In my younger days, I was this utterly stupid, embarrassing clown who should’ve been banned from the community for existing alone. Then I realized how foolish I was, and some other reasons slipped in the middle of it that made me stop using any social media platforms other than WhatsApp and YouTube. It takes time to build the courage to take care of social media again, and I need to always stay alert in case I make the same mistakes as the past, too.

From the words of famous Barbie dolls collector Trixie Mattel, decorating your own home is an important thing to do, too, since it shows who you really are. Your own home is one part of you that other people don’t get to judge, a part of personality that should be barricaded from the harsh opinion of the outside world. Related to this theme was the decluttering part of having your own home. Sometimes we get too little too attached to the things we don’t actually need anymore.

Relationship is another condiment element of our life that we couldn’t not talk about, but don’t worry, because Trixie and Katya lightly guided us through the art of meeting new people and how to properly hooking up. After those cheery cherry on top advice, these women also gave us the ultimate how-to’s on breakups and friendship. I will write it in here because I think these two were the most important advice pieces from the third part: 

One, Trixie said that the thing you need to do when you just broke up with someone is to not let yourself succumbing into the sadness to much, you have to be rational about the break-up too because parting ways with your ex is not the end of the world and there is still a lot of possibilities of love out there; 

Two, in friendship, it is actually good not to be possessive of your friend. Just because you don’t spend your every waking time, every minute, every second of your life talking with them that it means bad. No, sometimes it’s healthy because both you and your friend do have your own life and need the space and time to breathe. It’s okay to stay away for awhile, and it’s okay to catch up.

About this book, I thank God in Heaven that there’s nothing I don’t like in this book. To be honest, I promise myself I will close this book as soon as I feel like I am being scolded for the poor choices I make my whole life. It is an important thing to note, because I have a personal vendetta against any kind of motivational or life advice’s materials, even if it is given in the form of magical words on a best-selling book or the alluring vocals in a heart-wrenching song. No particular reason for my hatred towards motivational bullshits, it’s just in my nature to reject any hopes that certain people are trying to inject into society.

“Trixie and Katya’s Guide to Modern Womanhood” is an easy to read book, sometimes with self-deprecating jokes, humorous advice, or flippant statements that never fails to make me grinning from ear to ear. A lot of the advice given inside isn’t even that serious, I think, but when it is actually serious, it never makes me feel offended or anything. If there is any reaction extracted from me, is that I am seriously thinking and considering the point given by Trixie and/or Katya. Instead of telling me what to do with steps too demanding and expecting instant perfect results, like the other life-advice and motivational books out there, this book is giving me options with rational reasons behind it. This book urged me in a joking way, yet sternly, to do better. This books told me that it’s okay to fucked things up because human do fucking shits up most of the time, as long as we try to do better and actively trying to make amends about our messy past.

Isn’t that what life-advice books are supposed to be doing?

For some people claiming that they don’t really like to read books and are amateur writers, sure Trixie and Katya write a very excellent piece of book. It’s suspicious enough to make me think that they’re just bluffing about it. This book feels like it was written by veteran writers who write as their main job, and not a couple of drag queens who are busy touring and appearing on various YouTube channels with every other side jobs and business they currently own.

What an effortless read, this book is. It’s not that serious like more heavy-weight non-fictional or super engaging like the fictional one, I can sit it out for few hours and when I get back to it, “Trixie and Katya’s Guide to Modern Womanhood” will welcome me with open arms to read it again like I never leave in the first place. Trixie and Katya choose to write it with such simple words for simple sentences, and my illiterate ass is so grateful for that. Yet behind the unassuming sentences and the never-ending jokes, hids all the brilliant tricks to make those paragraphs magnificent and elegant while the clown make-up is still on. The power only Trixie and Katya has, all of you (and me) should take note of it. 

Last thing about their writing style, I need you to know that Trixie and Katya knocked me on the head and told me to read my dictionary more, since there were some words that I never knew existed in English. I have to say that I bought a very thick notebook since late June, intended to write all of the unfamiliar English words I come across inside the books I read, yet I haven’t done anything with it until now. This book is the proof that I need to do better. In a way, this book motivates me to be better just like Trixie and Katya. 

(Whether I proceed with that motivational sentiment is another topic to talk about another time.) 

What I also like from this book is that as much as it is a life-advice book, it is also a life-style magazine in very thick pages, perhaps a super super special edition one. “Trixie and Katya’s Guide to Modern Womanhood” is very cute in interior design, despite the fierce red of the cover. Splashes of pinks and pastel blues, cute big quotation and tips column, and the photos! Lord in Heaven, the photos! I can’t stop looking at every picture for more than two minutes, happily observing every silly pose Trixie and Katya made, and little trinkets and wigs and the costumes they’re wearing on those shoots. I feel like I’m having a special photobook of the K-Pop artist that I like. 

(No, I never bought a K-Pop album before, nor a K-Pop photobook, so I’m just talking out of my ass.) 

I’m so happy that I have the chance to read this book until the last page, and I also feel grateful because this book is kind and takes care of me well. For someone who doesn’t like reading motivational or life-advice books like me, I can guarantee you that you will love and cherish this book so much, whether you like Trixie and Katya or not. They won’t judge your every inch of life, nor they will kick your asses for being you. I’m hoping that Trixie and Katya will write another book next time. Cheers to these two biological women!

[barbielore]

Hey this is really random but did you know that today (the day this post will be coming out of my queue, in Australia time - January 14) is World Logic Day?

According to the director-general of UNESCO, Audrey Azoulay:

In the twenty-first century—indeed, now more than ever—the discipline of logic is a particularly timely one, utterly vital to our societies and economies. Computer science and information and communications technology, for example, are rooted in logical and algorithmic reasoning.

So I thought this might be a fun day to talk about a few STEM Barbies - or specifically, STEM Barbies that would link in thematically with World Logic Day.

For example, Mattel released a Barbie Role Models doll for Katya Echazarreta, an electrical engineer who at age 27 was the first Mexican-born woman to go into space.

She is now 28 and was also the co-host of the Netflix YouTube series "Netflix IRL".

As a part of the line-up for the 2018 Career of the Year, Barbie was also a Robotics Engineer.

Barbie has also been a Computer Engineer, though given the way Mattel bungled the storyline that went along with this, perhaps the less said the better.

[nowat-ladybugbutch-blog]

“Katya… little bit to the right, just move your- yeah, okay, that works,” The bright lights flashed again on the model’s face, highlighting her cheekbones, shoulders, collarbones, boobs. Or maybe Trixie had just been staring too long. Her boss walked past her briskly and a gush of cold air hit her face quickly, snapping her out of the daze she kept falling into during the shoot. The model, Katya Zamolodchikova, was in a bright red robe in the makeup chair, getting the bobby pins taken out of her curled hair and the extensive makeup wiped off her cheeks as she typed quickly into her iPhone. Her nails made clicking noises that Trixie could hear across the room. Her lingerie was still on, the tight purple bustier still fastened in the back and her garters still clipped to the black thigh highs that Trixie couldn’t stop staring at. Her muscles were visible through the sheer stockings and showed when she moved, flexing.

“Hey, Barbie, don’t you have to get back home to Ken? Why’re you still here?” One of the makeup artists called out to her, mocking her. Trixie huffed and walked back into her own personal room she had in the building, a small ‘office’ space with an armchair and a desk and sat in the arm chair with her legs tucked under her, looking through the pictures from the shoot, trying to figure out which ones would look best in a magazine setup her boss had been planning. She finally settled on one where Katya’s hair was teased and stuck out wildly, blonde and brown waves all over, and her icy eyes staring straight ahead. The purple bustier was accentuating her waist in the photo from the way she was sitting, making it look smaller than she really was. The lighting reflected on her cheekbones nicely, showing off the perfect natural contour Katya had. She barely even required makeup. Trixie didn’t realize she was biting her lip till she opened her mouth to take a drink from a water bottle next to her. She couldn’t stop thinking about red and purple and blonde and curls. The copper taste wasn’t leaving her mouth.

[trixemattel]

I assume you read fan fiction, is there anyway you could recommend some trixya stories for me? Smut is okay. I love your blog btw

thank you! here are a mix of stories uh mostly smut though:

happy birthday, katya basically where its katyas birthday and her and trixie fuck.

katya and the space barbie okay super weird title and concept but like just read it. you got a little shalaska too. and lots of smut.

little light basically that story trixie said in unhhh about getting her ass slapped in the bowling alley but katya is the one that slapped her ass

little plastic castle trixie is a bakery owner and katya is a regular and its super fluffy but also smut at the end

perestroika one of my favorites! in 2009 trixie goes to boston with her friends and stays with katya and it takes place over multiple years.

rose soap college au in the 70′s where katya asks to go down on trixie in a supply closet. lots of smut but also fluff. 

running basically katyas super horny while filming unhhhh and then they fuck.

wingwomen highschool au where trixie and alaska are cheerleaders and interested sharon and katya. 

[dragkiddo-blog]

Katya and the Space Barbie by squeakyshroom

Number one reason not to buy a sex doll from a sketchy, space shop— she might come to life.

Katya finds this out the hard way.