#kashimo the loser

[sailorsenshishitposter]

Hajime Kashimo x Reader

Hajime Kashimo:

You love getting into fights, you have a never give up attitude and your favorite Disney character is Lightning McQueen.

First Date:

It was the weekend and it was once again time to go through your list of errands for the day. Step one. You were now making your way towards the farmers market. The crops had flourished this year and you could get a good deal on groceries. You kept walking until you heard something in the distance. Yelling? It was usually calm here. You took a closer look. There were two men fighting. You then realized one of them was the nice man who you would always get your lemons from.

'Oh no'. You groaned. You knew he would never act this way so it must have been the other guy that instigated it. You walked up and tried to calmly diffuse the situation. "What seems to be the issue here?" The shop keeper pointed his finger towards the other. "This boy is a thief! He keeps stealing my precious lemons!"

"Is that true?" The boy scoffed. "So what? It's not like he put his name on them. They could belong to anybody!" The seller tried to lunge at him. "Why- why you little!" You then pushed him away. "Come on old man, he's not worth it." For some reason the boy seemed to think your words were directed at him. "Hmpf. That's how losers think!"

"Okay, that's enough!" You suddenly pulled him by the arm and dragged him away. "I'm guessing you're not from around here, huh? My names ############. What's yours?" He was quiet, deciding on whether on not he should answer. ".... I'm Hajime Kashimo. You better remember it because I'm the strongest there ever is!" You sighed. "So you chose to pick a fight with an old farmer because...?"

Kashimo face palmed. "Urk. Someone like you wouldn't understand!" He then noticed his next victim and ran towards them. This time it was the local gambling addict. "Hey you! You better be prepared for the fight of your life!" You pulled out a chair and some popcorn. This was going to be entertaining.

It was now six hours later. Kashimo was exhausted, being held away by a palm while he kept trying to get closer. The other hadn't even broken a sweat. "There's no shame in giving up you know." Kashimo laughed. "Ha! Fat chance! Just you wait, I'll end you!" The other boy sighed. "Whatever, I don't have time for this. I'm going to see Kirara. Later."

Kashimo was gasping for air. "Did you see that, ############? He got so scared that he ran away! Talk about being a coward!" You cringed. "Right... Well anyway, there's this guy named Sukuna. Turns out he's been looking for you so I'll leave the two of you alone. See you later." Kashimo gulped. "Well if it isn't the lemon stealing whore. You know it's not nice to take things that don't belong to you right?"

"..."

"Anyway I think it's fair to take your life as compensation. You humans eat fruit while I devour your kind." Kashimo blinked. "Wait wha-" Before he could react, Kashimo was hit by fuga. Now he was nothing but a pile of ashes. "Crap. I left the oven on too long. This happens every time! Sukuna's tummy mouth began to frown.

[svedupelle]

jjk is hilarious bc the whole theme of isolation and power is all about extremely normal and unwell people who have 100% brought this on themselves. "boo hoo nobody undwrstands me" gojo u dont have friends cause ur an asshole. like shoko's the only one who stands u

[twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat]

if u could give one single jjk side character an abundance of fan content who would it be and why is it miguel

[hxhhasmysoul]

idk what is with this fandom... the same people who hate sukuna and are oh so sad about gojou, also buy into what sukuna said to yuuji in this chapter... i guess maybe sukuna displayed gojou's level of comeback so they latched onto it. what can yuuji possibly do? how can sukuna be even defeated if gojou failed and kashimo failed.

since the beginning yuuji's shown superhuman physical abilities. plus amazing tactical sense and superhuman speed at which he learned things, especially all things jujutsu. but his most impressive and consistent ability has been his super reinforced soul capable of caging sukuna. and that soul did its job without him knowing how to influence it. now he's been given guidance. he also practiced by ingesting more cursed objects containing souls. he also showed that he can possibly soul swap.

also since the beginning sukuna has shown incredible superiority and detachment towards everyone. except for yuuji. he was ready to mock praise and tease everyone to get more entertaining fights out of them... except for yuuji. yuuji he bullies, diminishes him, tries to break yuuji's spirit. that smells like worry, maybe fear, definitely an attempt at psychological warfare. yuuji irks him, unsettles him.

jujutsu fights are about strength and cursed energy output etc, and so on, but they are also about compatibility as mentioned by gojou and nanami and mahito. also they are about planning and strategy. about understanding jujutsu and the soul, so yourself, your strengths and weaknesses. but also being able to understand your opponent as much as possible, their motivations, their behaviour, their techniques. this is why kenjaku and sukuna bested gojou because they both kept the fight on their own terms. kenjaku by not picking a physical fight at all and making it all about intrigue and cunning, sukuna by exactly tailoring his strategy to his opponent. this is also why gojou lost because even though he knew about the compatibility he didn't think that mattered in his case because he was him, he was gojou satoru, the strongest.

yuuji can win where those two lonely losers failed because:

a) he always performs best when he's fighting alongside others and he's not going in alone. being oriented towards others is the core of his character and it has always been like that. he's bested opponents stronger than him while learning and adjusting during the fight and the presence of others only spurns that on.

b) he's clearly going in with a plan, considering who he's going in with. and he mentioned before that he had a plan how to save megumi. he's been preparing for this. unlike some who decided to wing it...

c) he has a unique understanding of sukuna. and there's also been some hints that there's more to his connection to sukuna, some heian backstory. it's also possible that gojou was right and some of sukuna's technique rubbed off on yuuji, likely sukuna's true technique whatever that is. or at least yuuji has some understanding of it that he could use against sukuna.

d) there's something about yuuji that even sukuna senses and doesn't like. and one thing we can safely say about sukuna at this point, he's got expertise when it comes to these things.

e) yuuji was made specifically by kenjaku to imprison sukuna, and kenjaku is another expert in their field.

f) sukuna has ruined yuuji's life, has made yuuji question himself constantly, has given yuuji so much trauma and guilt, has taken so many people from yuuji. including megumi who yuuji might still hope to save. yuuji is uniquely biased against sukuna and uniquely motivated. gojou and kashimo had no emotional investment in sukuna apart from "senpai notice me i want to be one of the cool kids like you" and "senpai notice me i want to ride the belly mouth" respectively. yuuji has so fucking much more emotional investment. for him it's super personal on so many fucking levels.

this is why yuuji stands a chance against sukuna. this is why his win will never be an ass pull or main character magic. he's been meticulously built up as a character throughout the manga. if someone pays attention to the story, none of what i've written here is shocking to them.

[runabout-river]

Thoughts on JJK chapter 236 (spoilers)

😭

This chapter starts with a gut punch. A time displaced reality where Gojo suddenly sees his dead friend again and realizes, together with the readers, that he lost. Is this a figment of Gojo's imagination or a gathering of souls before they depart to the afterlife?

The souls have some heartfelt conversations with each other and Gojo talks about how strong Sukuna was (my analysis from two weeks ago is null and void at this point but my point that Sukuna isn't finished and that Gojo still needs to be taken off the picture has come true at least.)

We get a panel of Lotus flowers, and apparently they represent resilience and rebirth but more on that later. Gojo also talks about a father. His own or is this about Toji that Shoko will deal with now?

Nanami references a conversation he had with Mei Mei about choosing a path in your life. Going North for starting anew or going South for staying who you are. These directions have meaning in Buddhism but I don't know too much about it.

Nanami chose south and went back to being a sorcerer and the title of this chapter is also about going south. But what about Gojo? Does the north/South decision apply to him as well?

I wonder if the start of the anime season 2 influenced Gege into drawing this scene like this. And of course, Toji photo bombed the panels again. Overall, this scene has such a serene energy to it. Even in death, people can find peace, unfortunately I can see the death count reaching Demon Slayer heights like this. But also...

Is he dead? Completely and utterly dead? As we learn, Mahoraga is dead but Sukuna used its adaptation as a manual to find a way to circumvent Infinity and he succeeded. Sukuna straight up cut the entire space around Gojo making Infinity useless. Still, Gojo's head is still attached to his torso and in a later panel we see him smile.

Sukuna is actually happy right now, completely at odds with everyone else except Kashimo. Did Gojo show him what true love is? Will that love follow him to the future or will it be something fleeting? Will Sukuna yearn for this fight later on?

What will happen now and is Gojo truly dead. Some thoughts.

- "Go South" is a solitary chapter as it has no number in it, meaning next chapter will start the Kashimo fight as its own mini-arc

- There are actually multiple ways in which Gojo can still survive, most prominent being that his head is still attached to his (separated) torso AND Shoko's absence in this chapter. The Lotus flowers also strengthen a rebirth/survival theory.

Gojo himself had told Toji that he should've cut his head off to kill him properly and that principle still applies here and we see Gojo smiling in his last panel

Basically everyone from Hidden Inventory got to shine this chapter at the airport but Shoko, the only living person from that time, was conspicuously absent in the later panels. We see Yuji, Yuta and Maki but not her

Up until now, we could make a good guess on how Gojo's fight went by looking at Shoko's reactions. That she's missing here is telling in that a shocked face e.g. would've cemented Gojo's death

Shoko can use RCT on others and Gojo can use it on himself. In addition, as long as Gojo is conscious he can make a binding vow to help his healing, even if in this case it's about re-ataching his torso with his abdomen

Take note that Gojo lost this fight. He is the loser and he accepted that in the airport. He has no regrets regarding this BUT I will not believe that he won't have regrets in leaving his students behind with a sorcerer who even he couldn't defeat.

My hope is that Gojo will sacrifice his 6-Eyes in a Vow to save his life. This might be the decision he has to make on going North or South: going North to Nirvana or going South on the path of a Boddhisatva. The title says South.

How I see the next set of chapters going: The Kashimo/Sukuna will start and it will take centre stage but somewhere in the background Shoko will get to Gojo and try to save his life.

After overcoming the initial shock and going through a short grieving process over this fictional character that means so much to me, I've come to partially accept his death actually. I still hope for his survival and I'm sure that at least on the editorial side of JJK nobody would be completely on board with Gojo getting killed. Gojo is more of a face of JJK then Yuji in some ways. This character is important to the manga on a meta level and him getting killed before the end of the manga seems unlikely.

That the break happened last week on not after this one could be a sign that no one in Jump wants the "Gojo is dead" scene to fester too much before it's revealed that he will be saved, too.

[11queensupreme11]

who r the yanderes from tsunami most jealous of amongst each other??

Oh that's easy

From most to least:

Kashimo: is the most jealous and the most deadliest when jealous. If he was any crueler, he'd probably lock Mizuhime up in the house so no man could go near her. But he's not the type to restrict her freedom THAT badly, so he lets her out, but just no, he's more than happy to kill anyone he deems a 'threat'

Yuta: his jealousy stems from insecurity and possessiveness. Sure he's more confident now, but sometimes he can't help but recede back to his older self; insecure and scared of Mizuhime being taken away from him. But then the delusion comes in and he thinks "this guy's a threat, he's clearly trying to steal her from me!" and he won't hesitate to get rid of him

Gojo: he actually gets more jealous than Yuta, but the reason he's ranked below him is cuz his jealousy is just a tad less dangerous. Whenever he gets jealous, his cocky ass immediately goes "wait a sec! I'm sooo much better than this guy! I'm richer, hotter, have better tits and abs, I'm a total catch and he's just a loser! hahaha, what am I getting jealous for?" 💀

Megumi: okay, this guy at least tries to be somewhat reasonable. He knows that jealousy isn't good and that he has a slight problem with it, but rather than outright killing the guy he'll just try to... ruin him a lil (just like what he's about to do with Yuta). He's gonna try and find so much dirt on him and show it to Hime and Yuji like "you guys need to stay away from him, he's clearly a bad guy". Murder's only a last resort unless the guy's an actual danger

Choso: oh, poor guy. his jealousy stems from insecurity so when he gets jealous, he gets SAD 🙁 he'll immediately think that HE'S the problem and stress out the whole time about what he did wrong, how he needs to change himself, etc. His jealousy is dangerous but moreso for himself.

Yuji: has a healthy amount of jealousy and deals with it like a normal person. Most of the time, he can easily brush it off! If the jealousy gets too much for him to brush it off, he'll talk about it to Megumi and Mizuhime (though the latter would be a better option because Megumi would just encourage him to 'get rid of the threat')

Sukuna: he's last because he's soooo secure. Jealousy is a sign of weakness and insecurity to him. To him, feeling jealousy is like admitting that you feel inferior to the other guy, and Sukuna never feels inferior. He knows he's the best and he knows Mizuhime would never want anyone other than him. The only time he ever felt jealous was a thousand years ago, and he certainly learned his lesson from that.

[lordofshitposting]

Someone uploaded Kashimo's iconic "If I can't get through Hakari's jackpot for the next 4 minutes and 11 seconds, then I will win. But that's how losers think! Fine then!! Turn up the volume!! Because this, is a funeral for the living!!" x Tuca Donka on Spotify man what

[declanisms]

kashimo don’t lose to this loser ass ugly bitch please you’re too pretty we can’t lose you too

[missingn000]

Such a great chapter!✨️

Kenjaku is such a sore loser, like he acts so high and mighty but his plans got foiled by the wettest saddest guy in history. So embarassing for him. I can't imagine living for however long he lived and just staying in the same flop era with same flop goals. So cringe of him...😔

I am placing bets on Yuki vs Choso because I want those two to interact and because I think it would be funny if he betrays Kenjaku the second that fight ends. That man deserved more L's than the world is willing to give him (and the world is already willing to give him a lot of L's).

I love Mahito's dynamic with Hajime!✨️Like two stray cats that should only be adopted together. That car chase was iconic! It's honestly great to see Hajime slowly start to realize that there are things beyond strength. I can't believe Mahito hit a pedestrian...😔 Like, imagine the last thing you see being a green lambo with no driver and a person with cyan hair screaming in the other seat. I would never recover (neither will the random pedestrian).

“Haven’t you ever gone the opposite way on an escalator? Isn't it a fun challenge?”

This fool. “Fuck you! You know I’m scared of escalators!”

“That sounds like a you problem!”

“Of course it is, it’s my fear! That’s a me problem by definition!”

This made me laugh so hard, poor Hajime... being afraid of escalators...

I can't believe they gossiped about Nanami in a treehouse. Like, it's definetly something both of them would do, but I can't imagine Nanami's reaction if he ever finds out about this.

“Well, look what just happened with Sukuna and Suguru-kun,” Mahito says calmly, gesturing vaguely in the direction of the Nanami residence. “Kenjaku’s been scheming for over a thousand years, yet his meticulous goals were thrown off-course by the most depressed man in the universe! Isn’t that so totally hilarious?” 

I love Mahito!✨️ He is so real for this one. Truer words have never been spoken.

“Whatever his plans are, nothing’s gonna go according to them. I wanna be there to watch that” Me too bestie, me too.

I did not expect the emotional conversation but I am so here for it. Sukuna's whole backstory is so in our face, but also not? It feels like watching one of those 1000 pieces puzzles. I know that they all form a cohesive picture, one that he loves to hint at all the time (he really needs some friends to talk to), but I also find it quite difficult to form that picture. Maybe I will make a list of all of the dramatic prejecting his issues on others he does to find it easier.

Mahito cried about Kashimo! I an way too emotionally invested in that interaction, but it was so cute!✨️

Sukuna's high emotional intelligence combined with 0 social skills is so fun to witness. Like, unlike Kenjaku's mysterious ass he is here infodumping about his trauma for free all the tine. King of never shutting up and never keeping things private.

"Water is best as ice" I see you, Sukuna, I see you—

Gojo really did not sign up for getting emotionally damaged by some theatre kid with 1000+ years worth of trauma.

Surprisingly, Sukuna seems genuinely offended. “I am not,” he shoots back. “Anyone who thinks gender correlates to strength deserves to be eaten alive by the gender they think is the weakest.” Progressive king!✨️

Gojo and Suguru are so cute this chapter.💖 Suguru really got a lot of character development (even if he had to lose an arm for it) and I am so happy for him!✨️

Tsumiki is getting a character arc! 🎉

Her argument with Megumi was sad, but also somewhat necessary for her? Like, it's good that she finally expressed her feelings, she needs to do that from time to time, even if yelling at Megumi wasn't realky the best way (even if Megumi was acting a bit like a jerk). At the same time, poor Megumi. He is really going through it right now. Also poor Gojo, it's clear that Sukuna's words affected him.

I'll write more, but I really need to go to sleep. Happy 2 years of writing TPG! 🎊 This fic is honestly one of the best I have ever read!💖

ooh i'm so happy you liked the chapter!! both scenes were really fun to write.

omg you're so right, kenjaku really is a sore loser. deserved. i fucking snorted at "his plans got foiled by the wettest saddest guy in history." so true, getou really fucked everything up for him through depression and character development. GOOD FOR HIM. "same flop era with the same flop goals" i dfghjkl. as for your theory on yuki vs choso...hm...interesting...

you described pfpk SO well, "two stray cats that should only be adopted together." real and accurate. they're so attached, they're like cats who constantly fight but meow like crazy if they're separated (my sister's cat is visiting for the summer, and that's how he is with my cat....) rip the pedestrian, and anyone who saw a car driving itself

i love mahito too! i wanted to give him interesting motives for going along with kjk's plans, since we never really found out in canon. i don't think he bought into the whole curses replacing humans thing, so why did he stay? i think him wanting to watch and study humanity as kenjaku tries to dismantle it fits with his personality.

their emotional convo was fun to write, especially their allusions to sukuna. that's exactly what i'm going for: all the puzzle pieces for sukuna's backstory are there, but missing a few key pieces for it all to make sense. slowly, we'll put things together, but not before making things way more confusing first

SUKUNAAAA MY OVERSHARING BELOVED we stan one zero social skills king. he's so vague but so expressive, and it's so funny and paradoxical of him. he never shuts up, but what he says never has substance.

"Gojo really did not sign up for getting emotionally damaged by some theatre kid with 1000+ years worth of trauma" PLEASE YOU'RE REALLY POPPING OFF WITH THIS MESSAGE gojo did get hit hard by sukuna's scarily accurate depictions of what it's like to be The Strongest. gojo is unsettled by sukuna, but the opposite is also true, which will only worsen as sukuna and gojo learn more about each other.

yeahhh tsumiki!! she deserves a character arc of her own, dammit. i'm so excited to write it! her argument with megumi was so gutting, but she needed to get her feelings out in the open so they can both begin to process and heal. but uh, not before some trauma first.

thank you so much for your kind words and for all your support!!! <333

[dattebayousuratonkachi]

JJK spoilers//

KASHIMO out!!!!! He’s such a loser to think he could take on Sukuna 🤭🤭

[sailorsenshishitposter]

Kinji Hakari x Reader

⚠️Spoilers for chapter 238 kind of?

Kinji Hakari:

Your favorite movie is fight club, you love femboys or you just have a strong passion for dancing.

First Date:

You were out of money as usual and had heard rumors of an underground fighting ring. "It may not be legal but bills need to be payed. Besides, taxation is basically theft anyway so it evens out." You made your way towards the Gachinko venue, taking note of the other contestants. "This will be easy!"

You were now standing against your first opponent, a large, muscular man. "Hmpf. What are you supposed to be?" he sneered. You grinned. "My pronouns are they/them/causing mayhem!" You then struck him in the face, feeling his nose crunch under your knuckles. You only lasted a few more rounds, the rest of the guests being too scared to fight you.

As you were counting your earnings, a boy hung his arm around your shoulder. "Can you take my temperature?" You stumbled back awkwardly and tried to put some distance between the two of you. "...Why?..." The boy got right in your face. "Because you're giving me a massive fever babe!"

"..."

He took your silence as a okay to continue. "My name's Hakari and I think we can help each other out. I'll help you get some cash in exchange for hanging out with me and my crew for a day." You were already suspicious. "Crew?"

"Yeah, I have a harem of femboys. We wouldn't be dating though as I'm already together with Kirara and would need to ask them if they would be alright with being in a polyamorus relationship." The nerve of this guy to assume that you were already about to leap at the idea of going out with him! "I'm pretty good at gambling and I can get you some sweet cash from those earnings of yours. What do you say?" You shook his hand without hesitation. "All right, but you better not fail or your ass is grass and I'm going to mow it!"

Hakari introduced you to the gang and then took you to the local casino. "Stay here, I just need to make a quick stop!" It was now ten minutes later. "How good are you at baby sitting #######?" You noticed something behind him. "What the fuck is that?!" Standing there was an elderly man with teal hair. Damn, Hatsune Miku got old. "This is the old man. I can't leave him by himself and he needs an occasional walk every now and then."

Did he take some poor stray dog/old man to play house with? "This isn't what we agreed upon!" Hakari put his hands up in self defense. "I know, I know. Don't worry, I'll get you your money, you just have to make sure he doesn't sneak off. He's got a habit of getting into fights with people."

"Ugh, fine!" You eventually made it to the casino. You were worried that you would need ID but luckily the old man was able to "chaperone" the two of you. "Here's what we'll do. We split the money in half and then meet again in two hours." You then went your separate ways. You weren't really sure where to start so you went to one of the pinball machines. "Seems easy enough"

You were starting to get the hang of it when your ball hit a snag. "Huh?" You managed to open up a slot of some kind. "Three in a row. Well, here goes nothing!" You hit three times and were surprised that you didn't see bells or fruit. You had a match but you had never seen this before. Suddenly the words "FINAL EGGMAN" popped up and you then got a game over, losing everything that you had.

You kicked the machine. "Screw this game, I give up!" The old man then pipped up. "That's how losers think!" Whatever! You were off to find Hakari. By the time you found him you knew you regretted your decision. The boy was shirtless and yelling something about a "pure love train". You didn't see what all the fuss was about. After all, it's just pachinko.Wait, why was there music now? Shit. He was getting turnt up. "Hakari, stop!" But it was too late, for the next four minutes and eleven seconds, he was immortal. No one could stop him now. He ran out of the building and then used his femboy radar.

"I see one! The only problem is the giant meat head." Hakari then grabbed you and the old man. He threw a bag your way. "Here's the money. Now distract that guy over there for me while I go put on some smooth moves!" Ew. You were definitely never dealing with this guy again. "C'mon old man, let's get this over with."

Hakari had run up towards the stranger. "I'M BURNING UP FOR YOU BABY!" They grimaced. "I don't know who you think you are but let me help you cool off!" They raised a hand and an icicle pierced through Hakari's brain stem. "That takes care of that. Wait a minute. Where is my lord!?"

The two of you were going up to distract the random guy as Hakari had tasked you with but you weren't really sure on a plan on how to stall him. Then the old man began clutching his chest. "Hey! You're not having a heart attack are you!?" What came out of his lips wasn't something you had expected to hear. "He's so beautiful!"

"Huh?"

"Move out of my way, I need to see him!" The old man began to run off and honestly you couldn't really care. You were just glad that you could finally go home now. The old man was now in front of his target. "How can you connect with others?" The man raised a brow. "How can you love those beneath you... While knowing nothing of weakness?" Just before he could respond, the old man fell over.

"It seems he died of a heart attack." He looked down at his stomach which was frowning. "I should see if Uraume can get some use from this corpse and fashion me some waffles for breakfast."

[0ynes]

RIP BOZO

Why would anyone stan this loser Kashimo or think he was going to do anything?!

[m1ckeyb3rry]

bored and don’t feel like writing so here’s a list of which bllk boys i think characters from my various fics would end up with and why 👍 (inspired by one of my mutuals mentioning a crossover between bllk and one of my aot fics hehe). this is such a silly unserious post pls don’t take it to heart HAHA

pomegranate ink:

y/n would probably go for yukimiya!! considering her relationship with yuta, she prefers a guy who is talented and can hold his own, but is also gentle and soft for the most part. out of everyone in bllk i think yuki fits the bill best so i would say him.

tullia would end up with isagi!! she mentions that her type is someone kind, patient, and calm, with a sense of humor and skill at their chosen profession. if we ignore isagi’s on-field shenanigans he mostly hits every point!! i was between him and nagi for her but idk how kind and patient nagi is exactly JDSKDJJZ i think pomegranate ink tullia would stress him out so we’re going to go w isagi here

elakshi pulls up in the fic for a chapter or two, leaves, gets with a clan heir, and then flees the country with said clan heir during the final battle. truly there is no one more suitable for her than loki!! they can make random guest appearances together #couplegoals

hurricanes / hummingbirds:

it’s super hard to imagine past y/n with anyone besides kashimo, but i think if there’s any bllk boy who can match her and kashimo’s 𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓴, it’s kaiser!! he’s got a traumatic backstory (like kashimo), thinks hurting other people is the same as loving them (like kashimo), is one of the most talented in his generation (like kashimo), doesn’t understand emotions well (like kashimo), and is a surprisingly poetic asshole (like kashimo). so i guess kaiser it is!!

present y/n doesn’t explicitly like anyone, but out of all of the guys she interacts with (besides kashimo), nanami is the closest to being her love interest (he would’ve been if she didn’t have the hummingbird’s blessing), so if we’re looking at a bllk man for her, the only choice is everyone’s favorite emotionally repressed blond king, noel noa!! not my type personally, but to each their own. he would teach her how to do her eyeliner better than even naoya zenin, which fixes something deep within her that has been broken since she realized the worst man she knows has cunty makeup. how sweet!!

a song for the drowned/in chase of a mourning dove:

principessa y/n is a bit basic i am afraid…one thing abt her she WILL go for the dark haired blue eyed sassy emo combo every time!! rin itoshi is the obvious option (as long as he guards her well and is willing to risk his life to be with her, ofc). he’d be a little more irreverent than megumi, but considering principessa y/n loved megumi’s rude ass moments she probably would enjoy that.

lady tullia would like isagi at first (much like how she liked yuta) but she would eventually end up with hiori (how she would’ve ended up with inumaki). hiori has that sweetness but also a bit of a sharp tongue, and he seems like he’d be politically savvy, so i can see this working out well

asftd/icoamd elakshi is lesbian so she’s not getting w any of these losers 🔥 ig anri is the only choice by process of elimination 😭

ship in the harbor:

well. okay so this y/n is a very special girl 💖 iykyk…i think she would probably go for karasu (NOT biased)!! he has a vibe of competency and stability that she would really appreciate, and he’s the perfect blend of friedrich and hadrian in that he’s an asshole and would have no qualms abt calling her out when needed/responding to her sarcasm with his own, but he’s also very mature and good at reading people, so he wouldn’t push her too far or anything. i think he, a supportive man without any traces of ptsd or codependency, would be a breath of fresh air for her and exactly what she needs after everything she’s been through

not romantically, but i can see friedrich and colt liking chigiri!! and honestly they (esp friedrich) would find bachira funny so he’d be part of the crew too. definitely a lethal combo overall!!

endure:

endure y/n is childhood-best-friend-sexual so being realistic she’d just marry whichever one she knew since she was a kid HAHAH. jokes aside she did have a crush on reiner so i think in a non life or death situation she would like kunigami!! he would make her feel very safe and protected, and he’d probably enjoy taking care of her, so they’d have a good relationship

tullia ral only ever dated/liked jean, so if she were to be paired w a bllk boy, it would be reo — a good leader who’s more talented than believes, has self confidence issues that he hides w cockiness, and is handsome/a people person. much like jean!! except reo would’ve been able to buy that candy for her from trost and he wouldn’t even have had to dress up like a clown to do it so this is actually an upgrade on her part

[satoruhour]

I like losers and kashimo will be one of the

-🩵

he kinda is 💀💀 LMAOOO

come say hi <3

[akecrow]

Can kashimo get his lame ass groupie ass outta here like I’m trying to mourn not see his loser ass get handed to him

[tempenensis]

Fucking chad thing to say

"Turn up the music and get ready for you living funeral"

Hajime even knows how to bypass hakari's 4 minutes of immunity but he didn't give a fuck and didn't want to take a loser's way of winning.

Hakari and Kashimo is fighting to see who is the bigger chad between them lol