#kakashi bios

[lesbiankoby]

anyway something something it’s sort of funny to me that kakashi’s lackadaisical attitude is such an effective cover to a personality that is still uh. hm. regimented? fastidious? late to everything because he spends hours at his Scheduled Gravesite Visits in the morning and is very neat and particular and will nag you about nutrition and so on

[picsofbearsasyamato]

IM LIKE WHO ELSE IS COVERING THIS STORY LIKE

Dude even got the yam hair

He even does the scary intimidation trick

Anyways kakashi had hoki after the war

[yeeters-muse-archive]

Kakashi Hatake

Weight: 523 (237.2kgs)

Bio: With no longer being the Hokage of Konoha, the village hidden in the leaves, let’s just say he saw no point in being an active ninja in an era of peace and let himself go while still being a teacher for Naruto’s son, Boruto, and any others who were interested in learning the way of ninja.

Art made by littlefillip234 on DA

Image here

⚠️ Warning ⚠️ : This is for @nexus-of-heavies a muse blog that requires viewers to be of the US legal age for marriage or higher. If you wish to reblog this bio for one of my muses due to the artwork, please take this into account.

[tossawary]

This is a very niche fic idea that I have no solid intention of actually writing, but... "Naruto" has more than a few self-insert fics and some of them are transmigrations into canon characters. Some of them are about OCs who do not want to be a ninja and are desperately trying to get out of it. There's usually some deliciously frustrating tragedy and horror about the brutal and inescapable military system of Konoha.

So, I thought that it would be kind of interesting to do an OC-insert into Sasuke, probably ultimately more comedic than angsty, as the OC tries to fail out of having to become a ninja, but then has to struggle against the fact that a civilian Sasuke would probably be expected to start a new Uchiha clan ASAP. (They probably have to concede to at least becoming a genin for the benefits of legal adulthood of some kind at 12 years old, even if it means being a part of the damn military.)

But even if the OC would personally love to be a parent someday, they cannot condone participating in what's essentially a breeding program for a new generation of Sharingan-wielding super-soldiers. Children who are probably going to be chewed up and spat out by Konoha someday too.

I think it would be neat to have a character treat the Sharingan like a genetic disorder that they don't want a child to suffer. I think it would have been interesting if canon Sasuke had also wrestled with the idea of letting the Sharingan die out. Fuck it, he'll adopt if he wants to be a dad someday. I also think it would be funny to have an OC-insert whose goal is to get a secret vasectomy (body autonomy!) without the leadership of Konoha finding out.

Sasuke, as soon as Sakura becomes a medical nin: "I need you to do me a huge secret favor and NOT be weird about it."

Sakura, also still currently a teenager: "You're asking me to CASTRATE YOU, AT HOME, IN SECRET, HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO NOT BE WEIRD ABOUT THIS?!"

(And there's the whole fucking issue of the "Naruto" universe having cloning, so, no, a vasectomy isn't a solid guarantee of getting out of this. But it might buy Sasuke a few years to figure out how to avoid the mad science route too if anyone tries to force marriage on him at any point.)

Even throwing aside the issue of children, even in an AU where the OC-Insert is cool with having bio children, I think it would be really funny to have a Transmigrator Sasuke announcing outright in the first Team 7 meeting that his dream is to retire super early and become a shinobi tradwife to a super strong ninja.

Kakashi: "...What?"

Sasuke, possibly talking out of his ass to troll his team and because he's already spitefully exhausted: "I said what I said. I'm the only Uchiha left to pass on my clan's techniques, so my dream is to be a stay-at-home ninja, supported by a super strong spouse who can protect my family."

I think this would break Naruto and Sakura's brains. ("Marry Hokage Naruto" is not the worst plan that a transmigrator could come up with, probably.) I think that this would be a super funny start to a Team 7 OT3 in which Naruto and Sakura become rivals for the position of Sasuke's shinobi sugar daddy/mommy. (Naruto doesn't consciously realize that he's competing for Sasuke's hand in marriage at first, but he gets it after a few years or so.)

Kakashi is... So Tired. Obito, are you seeing this shit??? What the fuck.

I know some OC-insert / SI-insert into Sasuke fics exist, I just think the funniest plot direction for a transmigrator in this situation would be to completely bail on both the "take revenge on Itachi" and "rebuild the Uchiha clan" dreams in the least macho ways available.

Also, what WOULD Itachi think of Sasuke abruptly deciding to give up on revenge and to become a house husband instead?

[kiyoshi-02]

Got some time to finish this! Happier with this type of rendering as opposed to my previous stuff but still wanna improve in some areas!

Unfortunately toomblrr did not like the full version so this is as much as I can show (maybe we'll see if this post survives)

And here I spent so much time on Kakashi's booty, damn shame lol

I do have it on my Twitter @kiyooo_02 tho for those who care to see ;)) link to my account is in my bio!

[actuallysaiyan]

Kinktober 2024 Masterlist

WELCOME! It's the fourth year of Kinktober and I have a brand new batch of spooks and kinks coming to you!

First, a few things to remember!

I will not be writing any part 2 to any of these. I'm sorry but I just can't promise anything.

If you want to be part of the tag list, answer the form here! Be sure to have your age in your bio or pinned post! I'd prefer is minors DNI! If you don't have an age in your bio or pinned post, you will not be tagged.

LIST:

Breath Play with Daki(Demon Slayer)

Water jets/bath with Hiromi(Jujutsu Kaisen)

Overstimulation with Himeno(Chainsaw Man)

Fear play with Sanemi(Demon Slayer)

Aphrodisiac With Guy(Naruto)

Impact play/villain with Vergil(Devil May Cry)

Praise with Toshinori(My Hero Academia)

Lingerie with Kisuke(Bleach)

Deity with Kenpachi(Bleach)

Breeding with Toji(Jujutsu Kaisen)

Spit kink with Inosuke(Demon Slayer)

Student teacher with Jiraiya(Naruto)

Virginity with Kyojuro(Demon Slayer)

Size kink with Ira(Kill La Kill)

Yandere with Gyutaro(Demon Slayer)

Spanking with Dante(Devil May Cry)

Oral/69 with Tengen(Demon Slayer)

Intoxication with Epsilon(Pluto)

Dirty talk with Hizashi(My Hero Academia)

Cock ring/milking table with Zack(Final Fantasy 7)

Voyeurism/pictophilia with Shikamaru(Naruto)

Werewolves/knotting with Haibara(Jujutsu Kaisen)

Bondage with Gohan(Dragon Ball)

Vampire/infections/blood with Vegeta(Dragon Ball)

Office sex with Gojo(Jujutsu Kaisen)

Free use/CNC with Sasuke(Naruto)

Sex toys/vibrators with Aki(Chainsaw Man)

Camgirl/escort with Geto(Jujutsu Kaisen)

Squirting/cumplay with Kintaro(Golden Boy)

Double penetration with Kakashi and Obito(Naruto)

Age gap with Nanami(Jujutsu Kaisen)

As far as it goes, this is the official list for now. It may be subject to changes, as it already has. But I think this could be the actual official list! If any changes occur, I'll be sure to notify everyone!!!

[oh-no-its-bird]

"Kaguya is Kakashi's bio mom au" but it plays into the fact that she's a moon rabbit.

But like. Play into it play into it.

The unholy mix of a rabbit goddess and man from a wolf clan

Give him a killer kick that pairs with a bite strong enough to break steel

Some sort of dietary restrictions either leaning into the rabbit to the extreme or the wolf

The mask stays on bc the fangs mixed with the big rabbit teeth genes to become really big boi teeth + a nose so sensitive it can hurt without seals to help

All sorts of different body tells he had to train himself out of, like one where he starts to tap his foot when nervous

Etc. Etc.

[kankuroplease]

Will we be getting Sakumo’s pups lore? Like their names, bios & other lil headcanons of them? ☺️

Or will they be small background characters that’ll appear from time to time?

Either way! Thanks for blessing us with the Happy AU where Sakumo’s wife & children help heal him ❤️‍🩹

It brings me so much joy knowing that Sakumo is alive & happy with a family even if it’s an alternative universe 🥹

Sakumo truly deserves a happily ever after in some universe 😭🖤🖤 I have a little something I shared with some friends (thanks for the names, Nisi!!)

More under the cut because it’s kinda long but not too long ✨

Daichi Hatake

The middle brother is a total cinnamon roll that would give you the shirt of his back if you asked him to.

As a child he was super carefree and a bit unorganized, but seeing the gap between him and Kakashi’s abilities made him buckle down and focus.

As an adult, he is quite accomplished. He is still behind Kakashi’s skill level by a little bit, but he’s no longer bothered by it. He’s very proud of his brother’s achievements

He also prefers to chill with Bull when Kakashi permits it

Hides how picky of an eater he is quite well but he will eat whatever veggie when Kakashi catches him/puts his discreetly tucked away veggies back on his plate

He tends to hang out with the other jonin a lot because he prefers company to solitude

do to having witnessed his parents crying in each others arms after his father’s attempted suicide with Kakashi, he really only shows his vulnerable/sad side to Kakashi. The what if of that situation haunts him when ever he thinks about failing a mission himself and made him worried their father would leave them at some point

Oda Hatake

Oda has always been described as an old soul. He has always been mature for his age with the exception of stealing treats off of his brothers and using “but I’m the youngest” to get out of trouble

It wasn’t easy to be the younger of the three and Sakumo’s son, but he managed. Choosing to aim for a “desk job” Torture and Interrogation Force

He likes to read and will take Kakashi’s books without asking (including Icha Icha). Substituting the books with ones he’d recommend

He’s friendly enough, but genuinely doesn’t trust the “good” in others, so he has some walls to get through to earn his trust

Likes thunder storms and will sit outside in them to “breathe in the static”

Has a fancy pigeon pet with nubs instead feet that he spoils rotten. He uses her to send his parents messages in braille

Can’t take a compliment. Especially not one about his eyes 💀

Somehow manages to arrive even later than Kakashi to family dinners

Is more willing to question Kakashi versus following him blindly (no offense Daichi)

[maladaptive-ninja-returns]

New World (9)

Itachi Uchiha x Reader Fluff

Summary: The world War has met its end and Itachi has returned to his village. He questions whether he should set down his roots here when he meets a stranger. Or rather, a stranger is forced upon him by fate.

Warnings: mention of gruesome act of horror

Word Count: I downloaded Hinge to start talking to people and hopefully eventually end up going on a date. Still on the talking stage. Baby steps.

MASTERLIST in bio, darlings. Tags are open (check bio)

The forest behind the temple is silent. There is nothing but the crackling of sticks in the bonfire lit in the barren space in this forest that echoes in the night- the only well-lit corner in the entire village where the chief and other familiar faces are gathered. No one speaks. No one dares to. Everyone feels the heaviness of the thoughts in the air. Izo sits in one corner by the stairs leading up to the temple, brooding while sharpening his blades. Fukaboshi has made himself busy by drawing intricate lines and writing incantations with chalk; all within a four-meter radius of the bonfire. The temple chief who married the Konoha couple is there too, humming something as he sits facing the fire, lost in some meditative trance. The Chief sits at the foot of the stairs, looking at his watch periodically before looking around for someone. "They are messing with us," Izo mumbles, never pausing his hands that are busy with his blade. The chief does not acknowledge it with an answer. Izo glances towards the old man once, mocking a laugh and resuming with his weapon. "Did we make you wait too long?" Kakashi's soft yet rooted voice greets the Bamboo villagers from the darkness.

"No! No-" the chief hastily gets up to welcome the man, directing him to the bonfire- "not at all! We were preparing the grounds for the...um...you know." The chief turns around and sees Kakashi standing at the edge of the forest, having not moved an inch "Sato-osa," Kakashi addresses the Chief politely, "before my people enter these holy grounds, I need reassurance from you that this setting is in no way going to put them in harm's way." Kakashi takes a step forward, enough to put half his face in the light. He pulls his headband from over his eyes, bringing it to his forehead and resuming crossing his arms over his chest. "Because if my people are harmed in any form, I might have to make amends for it somehow." The chill in the air is unmistakable as a glow emanates in Kakashi's eye, his figure still shrouded in darkness. Fukaboshi side-eyes Kakashi, while Izo handles his blade in defence formation. The priest has stopped humming but has not opened his eyes. "The assassins from my villages have been sent to the northern border to patrol. Mothers and children are already asleep. The only form of defence I have is on these grounds. Do what you will with that information." The only sound that proceeds the Chief's declaration is the crackling of the fire and a sneaky breeze flowing at the edge of the hill. Kakashi tilts his head towards his back- but barely by a centimetre. Soon, shadows are taking figures behind him.

.

Naruto is the first to enter the clearing- with his hands behind his head. Then follows Nami. Behind her, you step into the light, your heartbeat having a terrifying but steadfast drumbeat. And even though you cannot hear him, you know he is behind you, silent but solid and standing his ground; watching your back. "So, how will we proceed?" Nami asks what everyone wants to know, never leaving your side. "We-" Chief stressing a little too much on the word- "will all be sitting around the bonfire like a group of disciplined little children while the...Empath does what she does best." He bows slightly in your direction, making you uncomfortable. Your gaze immediately falls on Kakashi as an indication for help. Kakashi- who is unsurprisingly calm-raises his palm a little as a sign of staying still. The Chief sits down outside the circle, giving no further instructions. Everyone stares at each other blankly- save for the Konoha leader. "He wants us to sit down," Kakashi declares with a sigh, pinching the bridge of his nose and taking his place to your left. Nami sits down opposite Kakashi, to your right. Naruto shrugs and takes his place right next to the chief- horrifying the other elders but earning a snicker from Nami and you. Watching his politically carefree but personally concerned demeanour puts you at ease. You are wondering what to do with your self- wanting to turn around and sit as well- only to come face to face with Itachi. The former assassin takes his time to sit down and you start humming the Konoha lullaby to stop any stray thoughts from entering your mind. A moment later you realise you have stepped inside the circle to maintain a respectable distance between you two. "Thirty-two years ago-" the Chief seemingly has started narrating some sensitive lore. Fukaboshi and Izo have already sat around the circle. "- there was a terrible snowstorm in the winter months, and our hunters had to go out to search for food as the rations were running low and our village had never seen such drastic weather before." "During one such hunt, one of our men mistook the gleaming eye of a little tiger cub for an elk on the hills and shot an arrow through it. It was only when the little one cried for help men realised they had killed a defenceless child. You see, Kakashi-san, we do not hurt younglings for we believe their spirits protect our lands. But ever since that day, a curse looms over our village; the curse of taking an innocent life. The men in our villages have been disappearing without a trace. The children cry endlessly on moonless nights, nearly starving themselves to sickness. And once a fortnight, we hear a low yowl through the forests that give the villagers undigestable nightmares." Nami is watching you closely, watching how your emotions change with every word. Within no time your hand is reaching for your chest, making her wonder if the tightness is towards the life taken or the lives cursed. She also does not miss how Itachi is sitting there with his eyes closed and crows are circling the temple grounds with a similar red glow in their eyes like the Uchiha. "Our high priest has made us aware of a strong feral presence lingering in the woods. We have tried hundreds of methods to get rid of the spirit but the danger still crawls through our village; growing stronger by the day. But we have failed every time. We had lost hope of ever recovering from this calamity." The chief pauses for an effect. "That was till we found out about the existence of an empath in the Konoha village. Which reminds me-" he tilts a bit in Kakshi's direction- "be weary of the underground faction of the rock village. They are selling your sensitive information for a price." Kakashi slowly nods. "So-" Chief smacks his thighs and straightens his back- "we hope you would help bring peace to our humble village, Y/N-san. We are begging you now to help the children of my village breathe in peace for the rest of their lives."

Wow. No pressure, you wonder, taking in a lungful of air. "I don't...I've never-" you do not know how to proceed, being at a loss for words and looking at your people for help. Y/N... A familiar voice echoes inside you, making you jump a little. Breathe. Itachi's voice is soft, reverberating inside you. How is he doing that? You whip your head in his direction. He still has his eyes closed, back straight, arms crossed over his chest. You do what you are told. Forget this village. Forget the children. Erase their suffering from your imagination. You breathe in the cold air and let go of those thoughts, leaving your mind blank. Think of that creature. The one who was attacked. The one who died in these mountains. You close your eyes and let your mind wander in the mountains, through the forest, riding the gentle breeze sweeping the stillness in between the trees. You do not know if these scenes are being made up in your head or if this is truly the forest taking shape inside your mind, but there is a glow at the end of all the darkness, calling for you. You want to slow down and be cautious in approaching that strange light, but your subconscious does not seem to halt, crashing headfirst into the infinite blaze. On the temple grounds, the audience sitting in the circle sees your normally slouched trembling figure come to a stop. Your usual shuddering breath goes still. Your eyes open with irises burning a slow smoking shade of gold. The bamboo villagers are the first to let out voices of surprise and horror. Nami's first instinct is to get up, but Kakashi raises his arm to stop her from making any moves. Naruto sits there awestruck. "Awesome!" he lets out a small whisper with starry eyes. The temple priest gets up and walks over to come face-to-face with you. He gets down on his knees and bows as low as possible. "Oh, great spirit of the forest! Listen to our plea!" He shouts at the top of his lungs, flailing his arms as a grand gesture. "Free us from our misery. Tell us what you want and leave us be!" Your figure seems to tower over the priest, looking down on him with null emotions before raising your head to look right towards the path leading down the forest.

"Misery," you announce with an amplitude so low that the audience has to lean in to listen to you. Your eyes seem to stare into the infinity of the forest with a wave of sadness washing over your face. "You do not know misery." A strong gust of wind blows from the forest into the clearing, bringing a low morbid growl that echoes around the bonfire. Everyone- save for Itachi and Kakashi- is looking around for the source of that voice. Nothing can be seen. But a heavy presence can be felt coming out of the forest. The forest wind threatens the bonfire to the verge of being blown out. "You do not know misery like he did," you continue, a single tear falling from your eyes while your right hand raises itself to point at a void. A void that- to the horror of the bamboo residents- turns into a twister that is a dark cloud, growing stronger by the minute. The priest quickly leaves his grandeur and crawls away from the angry cloud that seems to scream at him. The chief is slowly standing up in confusion- the years abruptly showing on his face amongst those wrinkles, for he had seen too much in his lifetime but never something this otherworldly. For the first time, Kakashi moves. He turns his head to Izo, observing the local man show signs of horror for the first time since they met. Izo is seen nearly falling back on the ground but his arms support him, his eyes stuck on the darkness. And just as Kakashi calculates, the darkness is reaching for him. In this chaos, Nami nearly forgets about you. But when her attention comes back to you, she can see you reaching for that darkness. "Y/N-" "You tried to save her," you shout at the dark whirlwind, the tears not stopping. "You tried to save her!" Kakashi gets up, readying himself to jump in and save you from harm. Naruto copies him, trusting his mentor's instincts. You take a step towards the twisting darkness. Kakashi dashes towards you. So does Naruto. Itachi's figure blocks them. And you have already stepped inside it. And just as you do, the dark cloud bursts open, sending a shockwave through the temple grounds, forcing everyone to fall at least five feet back. The Konoha ninjas have been shielded by Itachi's copies, saving them from being thrown away.

.

Stillness comes back. And slowly Itachi's copies morph into crows and fly away. One by one gazes fall upon you and then on the eight-foot-tall spirit of a tiger glowing a blazing hue of gold, all the while touching its head with yours. "You tried to save her but they killed you too," you whisper between sobs. You stroke the spirit's chin. His purr reverberates throughout the clearing, his head wanting to melt into your touch. "You were such a brave boy! Yes, you were!!" You softly coo at the being, smiling in between the sniffles. "Tried to save who?" The chief's voice shivers. Suddenly the tall leader of the village feels frail and small in front of the ethereal being. His eyes are still trying to adjust to the sight but his body seems to have already given up on comprehending this reality. You wipe away your tears but never remove your hand from the tiger's face. Turning towards the chief, you force him to follow your gaze behind you. And out emerges another spirit. A human spirit. A young woman with the softest features and innocent eyes. "Mitsuri!" Fukaboshi gasps, taking a step back. It does not take him long to tear up. "He was killed when he was trying to save her," you state, stroking the tiger's neck before pointing towards the stairs of the temple, "from them." The priest and Izo freeze, the shock replaced by rage at your audacity to point your finger at them. "HOW DARE-"  "Should I show them?" your mere whisper shuts Izo off. Your grit-spilling stare does not waver. Your eyes still glow. Your anger is purposefully spilling over the bring with those hot tears. "Should I show them what you did to her?" The priest dashes for the stairs. Izo's anger shatters and out comes the panic. He too starts to retreat for the steps to the temple building. Unfortunately for both of them, they freeze and fall to the ground, their eyes looking at the infinite void in multiple spectrums of terror. "Do what you want with them," Itachi's voice comes from the top of the stairs, "our work here is done." No words are exchanged. The impact of the night is heavy. But Nami and Naruto are only concerned for your safety. You look at the spirit for one last time before letting go of his touch. The glow in your eyes vanishes. As does the spirits. So does the adrenaline rush in your body. Your legs go weak, collapsing the first chance they get. But you do not fall. Itachi is already picking you up in his arms, securing you close to his chest. Naruto, Kakashi and Nami watch as Itachi takes your limp figure and vanishes into the darkness. "He is coming back to pick us up, right?" Naruto asks Kakashi with a genuine curiosity. Nami opens her mouth to say something but stops to exhale and flexes the frustration in her jaw instead. "Just so you know, Kakashi-senpai, had it been any other day, I would have eaten his head off for-" "I know-" Kakashi does not let her complete her thoughts, sighing and looking up with tired eyes- "I know."

𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟 𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟 𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟

Itachi has come back to the room. Ignoring the mess he made in the room earlier that night, he carefully transfers you to the bed from his arms. You shiver as your body takes in the coldness of the bed. The man brings up the duvet, carefully tucking you in. He then touches your cheek with the back of his hand, checking if the night was too much for your system. Your body feels a bit cold. He does not move. Why? The answer is incorrigibly clear. Trusting his gut, he lays down next to you, over the duvet to hear your snores turn loud all the while wondering how this cowering ball of sunshine was ready to mentally torture two men twice her size.

He is in awe. And his lips are not able to prevent a smile.

[notsorryiml8]

Haven’t posted about my Kakashi-obsessed friend in some time. She just finished Kakashi Retsuden and…

“this Nanara kid is a spoiled brat, but I get it!”

“Kakashi done put that boy on a tree…wind style!”

“Aww so heartwarming when pre-sensei Minato catches baby him after pop’s funeral”

“I miss the Sharingan and apparently so does he”

“I love that he goes to Iruka for advice!”

“Love that they compare him to a wolf!! Never made a connection to his hair being wolf-colored. I do get the fanon wolf-clan thing. White Fang, wolf hair…”

“They done did my boy dirty. I want to see that fire style water mist in action with the big fire bird!! Not fair”

“Okay, so Kakashi is canon-wise (this book is canon right??) considered the hottest guy in the whole frickin’ world?! Does he know this?? Do you good-looking people know you’re good-looking??? I’ve never had that “problem” so I don’t get it.

But seriously, all the women in this rinkadink town all the way around the world, thousands of miles outside of K-town, are thirsting for this guy. Paraphrasing but Village dude even said, “bruh, with the way all these women are all over you, I thought you had to be a spy.” ☠️

“He’s so humble, but after a while it gets old - it’s not fun to have to constantly reassure someone of their awesomeness. Trust. It’s exhausting. Dude you’re awesome, own it!”

“ I get it tho, unless it’s an auto bio that I wrote, I am not reading a book about myself. And that boy keeps throwing that book in his face. I’d burn it. You know, kid gives him the book, fire style:let it burn! oh wow I don’t know what happened, guess we can’t read about the sixth Hokage anymore, real shame”

“I love that by the end Kakashi just takes it all in when interacting with his biggest fanboy has the biggest smile and even internally calls the kid a fanboy!”

“They love their liquor! For real, tho, as soon as he gets back he literally goes to a drinking party with the K-12? Dude, go home, go to sleep. For all the people who swear the man does not drink and is this really pure saint of a perfect ninja dude on some pedestal please read. He’s the one that built the bars.”

“The baby ninjas (Boruto, Sarada, and Mitsuki) are sooo cute. They love Uncle Kakashi so much! Might just finish Boruto now. I know he’s not in the manga and is only in fillers, but still…”

“He is so loved by everyone!! K-12 was so happy when he walked in, everybody just wants him around, the ninja babies literally scream when they see him and run up to him. He has fanboys around the world, the women everywhere (literally, around the world) all want him. Land of waves welcomed him with fanfare and cheering crowds. It really is a future he never saw for himself. Squee!”

“He really changed the world. Modernized things. Set up trade. Used money instead of might. Introduced technology. Maintained peace. The only one of the five great nations who didn’t believe in instantly killing enemies after the war (restrain don’t kill). He’s so unappreciated/underappreciated by Naruto fans, but is truly appreciated in the Naruto world. The first five Hokage set up the foundation, he implemented the change, Naruto maintained it (kinda sorta, but also took it for granted).”

[rayshippouuchiha]

So I'm the newly converted kakanaru fan and I've been down an AO3 rabbit hole and reading all your Naruto AUs. You're such an amazing writer and thank you for making me read Kakashi fics again. When I was in the fandom a gazillion years ago, I'd given up reading any slash fics featuring him because they were mostly Kakashi/Iruka and while that's cute and all, most are also majorly OOC and go with the team mom/team dad characterization which I have major issues with ...1/

...Naruto basically raised himself and Kakashi especially did not have any kind of parental role in his life. Heck, before rasenshuriken the only thing he really taught Naruto was walking on water. Anyway Kakashi was a shit teacher but ended up being a supportive friend/advisor later and I think their angsty backstory is partly why they would work so well as a pairing. Your fics are giving me life...2/

...Besides your kakanaru stuff, I've been going through the AUs and I love all of them, especially Team Uzumaki and the shika/naru ones. I've been cracking up going through the CREAM verse tags because I can't believe people actually gave you grief about Madara's fictional taxes :D (Also, I tried to donate to your ko-fi but the link in your bio isn't working for me) 3/3

~~~

It's always a pleasure to be a part of helping to convert someone over to a new ship!! Naruto is such a fertile ground for various AUs so it's always a pleasure when people love my stuff.

And yeah the controversy with the taxes thing was wild as all fuck.

And if you still want to donate, which I am deeply thankful for, here's the link again.

[puzzleemerald]

Because Amaterasu and Sesshōmaru don't have much further art at the moment, I decided to share another couple who are most dear to my heart. YCH by the lovely Antodonatella on Instagram & DeviantArt.

Please don't reblog!

Keep in mind I will be talking about the FanFiction version of Ayumu in this post! The version of Ayumu I roleplay is her own separate deal! When her bio is done and put up on my Master Post, I won't only RP Ayumu interacting with exclusively Neji writers, lol.

Neji Hyūga is already a very recognizable character, being one of my very first crushes when I started really getting into anime as a thirteen to fourteen-year-old. In fact, he's the reason I later bought and read the manga... all hundred-heccin'-something volumes of it. Much like Sesshōmaru, it was his long hair, elegance, intellect, and stoic demeanor that won me over at first. It also amused me to watch him just be cool; he always felt like the definitive head of his team. Even if Lee wasn't to be sneezed at as a fighter, I saw more leadership qualities in Neji that Lee lacked. I also felt that he had the most interesting plight among the Konoha thirteen as someone from a branch in his clan where he was basically expected to serve and protect the head family deemed "above" him on the social-political totem pole the Hyūga were built on. Despite his innate talent rivaling the daughters of the clan's head at the time, he'd always be considered lesser because of his birth. In ways, he felt like more of an underdog to me than Naruto did—though that also has a lot to do with Naruto's characterization as the "optimistic headstrong protagonist" Kishimoto had going. (I kinda wish Kishi had leaned more into Naruto having some resentment towards the Leaf, but that's a post for another day)

So what'd teenage me do? Tailor an OC to be another half for him because GDI this man deserves happiness, not getting skewered like a redshirt on an overgrown splinter. If they had to have someone, ANYONE, sacrifice themself for Hinata... tbh, I wish it'd been someone on her team like Kiba or Shino, so we didn't have to basically do the thing he was "born to do" according to Clan tradition asfdhjrhyud—

Deep breaths. I'm calm. Suppress the fangirl rage.

So, as a result, I created Ayumu! Who was, by every definition, a Mary Sue at first!! (It was bad... oh god, was it bad...) But after I ditched her for a few years when I lost interest in Naruto, I returned to her when I turned seventeen and completely rehauled her. Leading to the designs she has now.

This is Ayumu's Part 1/Naruto Design. The Settei was done by a friend of mine on IG called Sento.OC, whom I commissioned.

Then, we have Ayumu's Part 2/Shippuden Design, also by Sento.

When designing an OC for Neji, I wanted to go more complimentary than contrary. It just didn't feel like it'd make sense for Neji to ever be romantically interested in someone with bombastic energy like Naruto or Lee—mans doesn't have the patience to live with that on a daily basis, LOL! So I thought, "Hey, Neji's a pretty traditional guy; why not give him a traditional woman?" and Ayumu ended up as a very grounded, calm, and analytical person. A bit more on the conservative side, similar to Neji. All the while having occasional bursts of warm, thoughtful moments where she lights up but doesn't explode. She's very, for lack of a better term off the top of my head, "normal" compared to Naruto's big personality, Sasuke's broodiness, Shikamaru's laziness, or Temari's ferocity. It's why I imagine her getting along very well with people like Tenten or Kakashi, too, who tend to be the metaphorical straight man to the more comedic characters around them. Characters like Gai and Lee and Naruto can only be funny, after all, if they're offset by some typically.

Ayumu is also a close-range fire-style specialist with a Kekkei Genkai related to it, so her style compliments Neji's pretty well imo. They can be in a shoulder-to-shoulder or back-to-back situation and cover one another while knowing the other is nearby and safely under their wing. Both characters have some insecurity and neglect issues but for very different reasons. However, this means they relate to one another over their feelings and traumas, and neither really feels a need to "fix" the other. It's what makes them last, in my opinion. They just quietly comfort each other (also slap whoever tries to put the other down, lol), and that's it. ...They did kinda try to scratch each other's eyes out at first, but that'll be its own post! Once they get over their big hurdle and understand each other, they end up just being a pair of supportive friends to lovers 90% of the time. The other 10% is them getting fucked with by the plot around them because Neji barely gets any screen time in Shippudennnnnnn! ;-;

[orochiposting]

Naomi Senju ๋࣭ ⭑⚝ | Bio and Facts 

art by the incredible @ its.sunjyo on instagram <3

Name: Naomi Senju 直美 千手 Nickname(s): Nao, Nao-Nao, Mi-Mi, Little Mouse, Princess Naomi Age: 26-27 (Part 1), 30-31 (Part 2), 33 (The Last), 52 (Boruto) Date of Birth: July 13th | 07/13 Status: Alive Current Affiliation: Konohagakure Parents: Tsunade Senju and Jiraiya: The Toad Sage Height: 5’2 or 157.5 cm (Part 1), 5’4 or 162.5 cm (Part 2 & Onward). Weight: 120 lbs or 54 kg Rank: Jonin / Medical Nin MBTI: INTP Gender & Pronouns: Ciswoman & She/Her Sexuality: Bisexual Romantic Interest: Orochimaru (mostly enemies to lovers)

Short Facts

Child Prodigy 

Daughter of Lady Tsunade and Jiraiya

Attained one of Orochimaru’s curse marks around the same time as her teammate Anko. (one of the early forms, before Jugo)

Capable of Water and Earth Release. Eventually learning how to perform Wood Style Release due to a mixture of reasons such as; Her Senju heritage, her natural chakra nature being water and her being capable of earth release, her chakra control and ability to mix the natures at will, and the Hashirama cells from Orochimaru’s initial curse mark form. 

Created her own version of her father's hair needle jizo technique.

Assigned to keep an eye on Orochimaru during Boruto, alongside Yamato. 

In her free time whenever she isn't surveilling Orochimaru, Naomi works at and with children from the ninja academy as a tutor. 

She views Mitsuki as a son

Fun Facts

She is ambidextrous (both right-handed and left-handed, technically.)

Naomi roughly translates to “straight and beautiful.” The kanji for Nao means “blunt, honest, and/or frank.” And Mi which means “Beauty.” 

A heavy drinker and regular smoker

She's read every one of her father's 'romance' novels

Close/Best friends with Kakashi, previously close & even protective of/with Obito during their childhood

Like her mother, she's often called a 'princess' due to her clan and heritage relating to the Hokages throughout the village's history.

Her favorite color is lilac

She's an 'oddly skilled cook' according to anyone who's eaten food prepared by her.

Despite taking after both of her parents in a multitude of ways, she refuses to ever begin or try gambling due to how it affected her relationship with her mother when she was young.

Likes

Reading

Romance or Action/Adventure Novels

Rain

Drinking

Training

Red Spider Lillies

Mice / Small Rodents

Smoking

Snakes

Cooking Meals (for herself or others)

Picnics 

Long Hair (both on her or those she finds attractive)

Routine/Repetition

Competition 

Caffeinated Drinks (Especially Tea)

Studying (Jutsu’s, Science and History) 

Particularly Fond of Biology 

Teaching / Educating 

Dislikes

High Pitched Voices

Hot Weather

Eggplant (the actual vegetable) 

Having Her Picture Taken

Crowded Rooms

Mushrooms

Winged or Flying Insects / Bugs

Sweating

Lightning 

Riddles

Her Hair Being Touched 

Losing to Those She Considers Weaker than She is

Gambling Without a Strategy (So Most Gambling)

Sour Sweets or Foods

Laundry

Personality Traits 

Positive – Persuasive, Analytical, Convincing, Intuitive, Efficient, Caring, Blunt, Honest, Often on High Alert, Observational, Compassionate, Passionate, Intelligent, Calculated, Ambitious, Tactical, Usually Unselfish, Creative, Studious, Witty, Unconventional, Aloof, Merciful, Understanding, Hardworking, Innovative, Resourceful, Resilient

Negative – Abrasive, Emotional, Bipolar, Stubborn, Morbid, Obsessive, Indecisive, Undisciplined, Somewhat Disorganized, Addictive, Impulsive, Jealous, Paranoid, Resentful, Self-Destructive, Temperamental, Snarky, Restless, Sarcastic, Perverted

Life Motto – “If you’re not obsessed with your life, change it.”

Nindo: “What is meant to be will always find a way.” referring to how she truly believes if something is meant to be, it’ll happen no matter what.

Clan Info

Clan Name: Senju Specialty: The Senju clan is known as "the clan with a thousand skills" (千の手を持つ一族, "sen no te o motsu ichizoku") because they can master ninjutsu, taijutsu, genjutsu, and other techniques to give themselves a variety of skills for fighting. The Senju clan's name, "Senju" (千手), directly means "a thousand skills" or "a thousand hands." Kekkei Genkai: Wood Release  Ninja Information Birth Village: The Hidden Leaf / Konohagakure  Current Village: The Hidden Leaf / Konohagakure Academy Graduation Age / Genin Age: 6 Chūnin Promotion Age: 10 Rank: Jonin Previous Teammates: Anko Mitarashi & Tokuma Hyuga Previous Sensei(s): Orochimaru Natural Chakra Nature: Water (although capable of Earth, Wind, and Wood.) Weapon(s): Initially, simple kunai and a regular katana– but following Orochimaru being sealed by Itachi, Oro drops the Sword of Kusanagi/The Grass-Mowing Sword and while Pakkun is searching for Sasuke it is found. When returned to the village, Pakkun gives the sword to Kakashi– who gives it to Naomi to keep.  Talents/Skill(s): Master of Most Medical Ninjutsu/Completed Tsunade’s Medical Ninjutsu training. If marked with an (O) she learned it from Orochimaru. If marked with a (T) she learned it from her mother, Tsunade. If marked with a (J) she learned it from her father, Jiraiya.  Jutsu(s): Teleportation Technique, Substitution Technique, Hidden Shadow Snake Hands(O), Mist Servant Technique, Sly Mind Affect Technique, Water Release Hiding in Water Technique, Water Release Water Gun, Water Release Wild Water Wave, Water Release Water Dragon Jutsu, Wind Release Gale Palm(O), Water Severing Wave, Wind Release Great Breakthrough(O), Vacuum Sword, Earth Release Hiding Like a Mole Technique(O), Earth Release Shadow Clone, Earth Release Swamp of the Underworld(J), Bruising Sky Leg (T), Wild Lion’s Mane Technique, Needle Jizo Technique(J), Hair Needle Senbon(J), “Gallant Needle Hedgehog Technique” (self-made, named after her father + hair manipulation sub-jutsu), Reserve Seal-The Hundred Healings Mark(T)

(incomplete) Backstory  (will be updated...)

Naomi Senju is the only daughter of Lady Tsunade and The Toad Sage Jiraiya— a result of a one-night stand between the two legendary sannins who shared a complex relationship. She was raised by her mother, unaware of who her father was until she was 4 years old due to her mother’s wariness on Jiraiya’s stance on fatherhood or his ability to commit to such a life. But he adored his daughter once finding out about her, despite still being gone most of the time to ‘research’ for his novels or on actual missions. When he would visit the village, he’d spend days with both his daughter and Tsunade. Bonding with both of them and even training Naomi little by little— and she was a little prodigy. Her chakra control and output being her strong suit even when just enrolling in the academy– which she did early at just age 4.

As Naomi aged, her mother’s gambling addiction grew ‘worse’ and she too was often gone— Leaving a young Naomi to become self-sufficient early on. She studied on her own, and with the sensei’s from the academy more often than she’d do anything else. However, her years in the ninja academy were vital for her— making a select few friendships that would last a lifetime with her fellow classmates. The young Senju struggled with making friends, though mostly due to how hot-headed she came off at that age. Not tolerating bullying around her, and not hesitating to fight others that tried to push her too far. She would have gotten in trouble if it wasn’t for how the adults seemed to favor her, be it for her young talent or sannin parentage. 

The competitive prodigy she was, once Naomi heard wind of her friend Kakashi taking the graduation exam early, she couldn’t bear falling behind. Frustrated, the young girl stormed off in a fury without thinking— not paying attention to if anyone was watching her or where she was going. She found herself lost in the forest outside of the village before several large, ferocious animals approached her. Snarling and sniffing at her before relaxing, rubbing against her extended hand for them to smell. It was confusing and odd, both for Naomi and Orochimaru who watched from a distance. The scene before the sannin taught him not to move any closer, expecting the animals to be sensitive to who could get to whatever they were guarding. But for some reason, Naomi was allowed— in fact, one of the oversized hounds began to lead her further into the woods. It was in this forest she’d find the Senju Clan’s hideout for the first time, reading a small inscription that guided her on entry before making her way inside. Curiously and anxiously looking around before spotting scroll after scroll, and book after book. She stayed in the hidden temple for hours, reading and attempting to replicate what she’d learned. When she finally left the building, Naomi knew she had learned something that would for sure convince the academy to allow her to graduate early too. 

When she returned to the village, being guided out of the thick of the forest by the oversized puppies(in her eyes), Naomi went straight to her sensei and insisted he’d watch her perform a jutsu for graduation. Once given permission, she led the teachers outdoors and began to form hand signs in quick succession before a beam of wood protruded from the palm of her hand. Extending towards a tree only 3 yards away from the young girl, before falling onto the ground. With an annoyed huff, she stomped and released the jutsu- allowing the wood to fall from her hand before she crossed her arms over her chest in a pout as she complained she didn’t do it correctly. Despite this little tantrum for not being ‘perfect,’ both the teachers and Orochimaru in the distance were astonished to see the young girl performing wood-style release even if unpolished. She was instantly granted the right to graduate alongside Kakashi. Although neither of them would be placed on teams of 3 until later, they instead did small solo assignments within the village until the rest of their class graduated. 

It was due to her unexpected ability to hone wood-style jutsu that Orochimaru would take an initial interest in her- her potential rather, especially considering the experiments he was actively working on at the time in secret. He’d start to come by more often, offering her guidance in her training until she would eventually be placed on a team of 3 alongside her friend Anko under the sannin’s tutelage. Like Anko, Orochimaru would bring Naomi to his laboratory and teach her. Both the young girls looked up to him, and Naomi even felt pride at how well she retained information or would actually assist in his work- even if she didn’t understand what was going on with it, or any of the real details. Years would pass of Naomi growing close to her sensei, attached to both him and the lab itself– almost seeing it as a safe place to do and say as she pleases. And yet, it was one fateful day when Orochimaru would bring Naomi to his lab that would change her life, and how she’d view those ‘happy’ memories of training with him for years to come. The day he would place the curse mark on her before doing the same to Anko days later, the original version of it— with Hashirama cells, curious to see how she’d react compared to the Senju children like Tenzo he was experimenting on. It was painful, confusing, and horrifying for the young girl— but she survived, and that was a positive. Soon after both she and Anko return to the village, the third coincidentally finds out about Orochimaru’s experiments on the different children and humans. Leading the girl’s sensei to abandon both them and the village altogether. 

Following Orochimaru’s disappearance, Naomi struggled to manage her curse mark while still training for the chunin exams– Seeing as when Orochimaru was still both her and Anko’s sensei he recommended the team for promotion. All three of his previous students would pass the exams and become chunin. 

For 4 years, Naomi went on missions with other chunin or assisted Jonin on any assignments she could get in between her solo training– trying to make up for the loss of a teacher on her own. Although, she finally got some solid one-on-one training with her father, Jiraiya, in this period of ‘peace.’ He’d finally teach her about his hair manipulation technique or more specifically the Needle Jizō technique. 

When the nine tails attacked, Naomi was 14. Despite all she’d seen and gone through up to this point, the destruction left on her home by the nine-tails was unlike anything she’d ever seen before. The horrors she saw from the attack caused her to put her studies and training into overdrive as if she wasn’t already overworking herself. In just two years after the nine-tails attack, Naomi had successfully passed the exam and additional requirements to be promoted to Jonin at age 16.  (I will make posts with art of her I get commissioned over time to describe and talk about her life during the series !! and potentially write more about her as a whole.)

[shinobinvku]

Hello friends, just wanted to give you all a heads up. I've made some adjustments to my carrd, particularly to Kakashi's bio. He now has a verses page.

From now on, my Kakashi's default verse will be a more canon-divergent one. Long story short: It's set in a alternative timeline where he stayed in ANBU, acting as a pseudo-guardian to Naruto and Sasuke. I'd be more than happy to share details with anyone on Discord, otherwise I'll save it for RP.

If you want to interact with a more canon-compliant version of Kakashi where he's a teacher, you'll have to request for it. I'll likely be doing this for all my canon muses, making them more canon-divergent.

Thanks in advance!

[tranzfalgar]

Who was the parental figure at the weddings at the end of naruto shippuden?(plus other what ifs)

so, we know naruto asked iruka to be his father/parental figure in his wedding, but what about everyone else?

just made a couple of hcs of who they would be, and i add some hcs to it too!! (i am american so i might accidently include things sorry for that)

Canonically Wed Characters

Naruto

His father in the wedding was Iruka

Iruka cried like a bitch at the ceremony, and then got drunk later on off sake and cried some more LMAO

Hinata

Her father in the wedding was Hiashi

Her mother in the wedding was Kurenai

Bonus: Mirai was the flower girl @ her and Naruto's wedding

Ino

Her father in the wedding was Choza

(Since her, Shikamaru and Choji all grew up together, I thought he would do this for the kids, as well as his two friends)

Her own biological mother was alive at the time of her wedding

Sai

His father in the wedding was Yamato

Yamato father figure to Sai real bc I said so

Sasuke

His father in the wedding was Kakashi

The only reason he had a father figure at his wedding is because Sakura wanted him to

Kakashi is the closest thing to a father he has (if you say 'but Orochimaru' I am gonna tear u apart with my teeth let me have this)

Sakura

Her father, Kizashi and her mother, Mebuki, were both at her wedding

Ino was her maid of honor <333

Shikamaru

His mother, Yoshino Nara, was alive at the time of his wedding

Choza offered to give a toast from himself, Shikaku and Inoichi

Temari

She had no father or mother at the wedding

It was her and her brothers :)

Choji

His father was there, and his mother as well I believe :D

If only...

Lee & Tenten (separate weddings just the same father figure)

GAI SENSEI WOULD GLADLY FILL THE ROLE

I will cry simply at the idea of this shit, if someone finds a story that has this aspect, please hand it over, I will cry

Kakashi has quite the time at both of these weddings simply bc Gai won't stop crying

Yamato

HEAR ME OUT- Tsunade. I have a little HC that her and Yamato are kinda like brother and sister or cousins bc wood style thing.

She sees he has no other family, so she deems him a Senju due to his wood release.

I really like this hc I needed to include it somehow

In a different timeline (just hear me out okay?)

(this is a parental figure besides their own bio parents btw)

Neji

Hiashi. Just think with me for a second. *cries so hard i crumble to the floor*

He would say smth like "you're father would be proud of you," and Neji LOSES HIS FUCKIGN SHIT

Kakashi

Just. Listen. for a second. Minato, Kushina, or Maito Dai. Just. *bites a rock*

Iruka

Hiruzen. Just consider <3

Naruto

Listen I don't like the guy either, but Jiraiya as his father at his wedding would have killed me /pos

"Minato, Kushina, your son is a good man, I'm sure you two are proud."

😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Tsunade

If she did get married after her grandfather passed, I think Tobirama would have filled his place if he was alive

if u read this far, thank u!! also, please feel free to add more to this idea or alter mine !!

[lemony-snickers]

@butter--peanut ficti-gram for you!

to: @butter--peanut from: @wind-becomes-lightning message: Hello my love, I mean my rival, I am currently working through the first pages of the book you are writing and am in total awe of your work!! I want to send you this little sweet thing so you can relax a little for a minute with a good fic before you dive into rewrites again! I am very happy that I met you and that we have met in person so many times and hopefully many many more times until you leave forever! (;(). Sending you many hugs!! <3 characters/pairing: kakashi hatake/obito uchiha word count: 3,646 prompt: the smell of coffee

Obito Uchiha has always hated the smell of coffee.  Freshly roasted at a fancy kissaten or poured from a grody two-day-old carafe into a travel mug, he thinks it always smells like burnt piss.  No amount of sugar or milk or cream or flavoring could ever make it palatable, and Obito will never understand how anyone, under any circumstances, could ever find themselves so desperate for an infusion of caffeine they would resort to drinking it.

Admittedly, coffee might be a useful beverage to keep on deck in the event of poisoning, to make a person throw up.  Maybe.  He’d have to be really poisoned to consider it, and Obito sees no other reasonable purpose for the existence of such a foul liquid.

Normally, Obito is fairly adept at avoiding coffee in all its forms, but there is one occasion upon which he has little to no control over whether he’s subjected to it and that is whenever Kakashi Hatake texts him to say he’s on his way over.

It’s still relatively new, all the Kakashi stuff.  When Obito ran across his old classmate on a dating app, he’d only partially been serious when he swiped to match with him.  Mostly, Obito was curious.  He smirked when he saw Kakashi’s profile—pathetically sparse and with a picture that didn’t even show his entire face—because it was very clear Kakashi was looking specifically for hook-ups while Obito had spent hours agonizing over which photos to upload, how many of his own scars to show, and how to make an appropriately-but-not-too-seriously self-deprecating joke about them in his bio.

Online dating is a terribly complicated thing, it turns out, when half your body is marred by the mistakes of your past.

Obito had not expected to match with Kakashi in the slightest.  At best, he thought he might receive a message something along the lines of, “Fuck you, loser,” before he was blocked.

Instead, Kakashi invited him out for a drink and Obito—perhaps foolishly or at least with a dash of foolhardy optimism—said yes.

The alcohol helped soothe the awkward sting of their reunion.  They spent hours at the bar, ordering round after round, allowing the fuzziness of the booze to seep into their blood, their bones.  Cloud over all the terrible parts of their shared history they did not wish to relitigate or relive in any detail.  Their conversation remained light, easy.

Perfunctory shit only.

“How have you been?”

“Good, you?”

“All right.  What do you do for work now?”

“A little bit of everything, really. Whatever brings in enough to cover my rent.”

Kakashi cracked a grin at that and Obito turned his attention toward his beer to hide that he liked it.  There had always been something terribly magnetic about Kakashi.  Even as a kid, when they first entered school together, Obito always found himself drawn to him, desperately trying to escape his orbit with very little success.

It would take several years of distance and a decent amount of therapy for Obito to recognize the feelings of his adolescent self for what they were.  That all the jealousy and anger had been part and parcel to something else, something soft and unknowable, then.  Something he hadn’t been yet able to acknowledge or put voice to.

Obito didn’t realize he was interested in men for a long time after Kakashi was no longer part of his life.  Now, though?  It was painfully clear Obito measured every man he’d ever dated by the metric of his old schoolmate, and not one of them had ever passed muster.

So when Kakashi invited himself to Obito’s apartment after they split their bar tab, he acquiesced.  When he shoved Obito against the wall in the entryway and bruised a kiss against his mouth, Obito’s knees buckled.  When a hand shoved its way down the front of his jeans, Obito whined.

It was so easy to succumb to decades of longing.  To open the half-crushed box where he’d packed it all away and dust it off, return it to a shelf in the sunlight where he could stare at it.  Covet it.

Ignore everything else in the box except this one thing.

And now when Kakashi calls—err, texts, he never calls—Obito unlocks his front door and waits patiently for him to stride in and repeat it all again.

It’s rather infuriating if he gives himself any time to think it over.  That he allows Kakashi to wander in and out of his life like a wraith without expectation or explanation.  He comes and goes as he pleases and part of Obito hates himself for allowing it to continue.

The rest of him, though, sees it as a reward for all his patience.  For all the progress he has made since they last saw each other, broken and bruised and grieving.

Obito’s therapist tells him there might be too much history between them for any of this to work on a functional level.  But then, Obito has never really been all that functional.  At least now he has someone in his life who will touch him, make him feel good without also making him feel self-conscious of his body.

It’s complicated.  At least, that’s what he tells himself (and his therapist), so he doesn’t have to unpack the rest of the box.

But Obito knows deep down none of this is sustainable.  While he’s willing to take what he can, he’s also not a moron.  He’s willing to take what he can get and be satisfied with it; always has been.

What makes things infuriatingly more tenuous, though, is that Kakashi always smells like coffee.

Obito knows that’s probably a sign, but he refuses to read it.

It doesn’t matter what time of day or night he appears at Obito’s door, all hungry eyes and demanding touches, there is always this persistent burnt scent that lingers under everything else.  It’s pervasive.  Poisons the very air of Obito’s apartment as Kakashi swoops in without a word.

It clings to Kakashi’s clothes, his skin, his hair.  It’s on his tongue when it pushes its way into Obito’s mouth, staining itself onto his teeth.

Coffee.  Every time.  Everywhere.

And during the course of their liaisons, the scent transfers itself to Obito, sliding against his scalp and burrowing into the thick folds of his scarred skin.

The burnt piss smell lingers in his nostrils long after Kakashi departs, trailing in his wake like a vile stream, and Obito spends an inordinate amount of time in the bath afterward trying to scrub away the putrid scent and replace it with fruity-smelling body wash or the lavender oil his therapist tells him is good for promoting relaxation.

He doesn’t think he agrees, but it smells nice, so what the hell?

His therapist might also have something to say about Obito’s obsessive need to clean himself every time Kakashi leaves his apartment, but he doesn’t like to think about that much.  Each time, he convinces himself it is the smell and not their fraught and complicated history which demands another cycle of shampoo.  He dips his head beneath the surface of the water until his vision stings and blurs so he won’t imagine what his therapist’s frown looked like when he said as much during their last session.

Obito is a big boy who can make his own decisions, thank you very much.  He just wishes his potentially poor life choices didn’t come with a side of putrescent coffee bean stench.

After a brief On my way text message, Kakashi arrives this time with a soggy-looking bag of takeout and plops it on Obito’s kitchen counter.

“For me?” he asks teasingly, “You shouldn’t have.”

Kakashi rolls his eyes.  “It’s mine and you can’t have any,” he says, shoving his hands into his pockets.  Obito rakes his eye over Kakashi’s frame, taking in the lean, wiry muscle of it.  His posture is terrible, he looks like a shepherd’s hook the way his spine curves too much at the top.  As always, Obito’s gaze eventually finds the scar over Kakashi’s eye, traces it carefully.

Whenever he tries to touch it while their kissing or fucking, Kakashi pulls him away, tangles their fingers together or tugs his wrist down to the mattress and restrains his hand there, like it can’t be trusted not to wander.

He doesn’t like to acknowledge his scars any more than Obito likes to acknowledge his own, and Obito wonders if that is part of why they remain within one another’s terrible, destructive orbit.  Because neither of them needs to explain their scars to the other—they were together when they were earned.

Kakashi, for the first time since this all started months ago, looks unsure.  He stands in the liminal space between the kitchen and the living room, rocking slightly back and forth on the balls of his feet.  His energy is nervous.  Sizzling.  Like a crack of lightning splitting the night sky in half.

“Something on your mind?” Obito asks, trying not to let the panic he feels fluttering in his chest make its way into his voice.  It’s like there’s a hummingbird trapped in the cage of his ribs, frantic to escape.

Kakashi shakes his head.  “How, uh… how was your day?” he asks, and a grimace follows immediately, slicing its way across his face like the dull side of a kitchen knife.

Obito can’t help it, he tries not to laugh, but it takes only half a heartbeat for the raucous noise to skitter out of his chest, setting the hummingbird free as he guffaws.  Watching Kakashi try to be normal, try to treat their interaction as if it is casual and regular, is the funniest shit Obito has ever seen.

Kakashi rolls his eyes and takes two quick, purposeful steps forward.  It’s then the coffee scent slams full force into Obito, snaking its way up his nose and into his throat.  He gags a little and Kakashi halts his advance, pausing just as his knee would have brushed against Obito’s own where he sits on his ratty old couch.

“Something smell bad?” Kakashi asks, glancing over his shoulder at the takeout he deposited on the counter.

“Yeah,” Obito says, pinching his nose closed for dramatic effect, “you.”

Still, after all the years of knowing him, of provoking him—and then missing him—Obito experiences the same swift thrill whenever he catches Kakashi off guard.  And watching the confusion blossom over his features, first in the subtle downturn of his mouth at the edges and then in the wrinkles of his nose and crease of his brow, is a glorious, wonderful thing.

“Me?  I smell bad?”

Obito rises slowly from his seat, the good side of his face pitched up in a grin.  “You smell fucking terrible all the time.”

There’s that gorgeous, adorable confusion again.  Deepening.  Pulling Kakashi’s lip toward the infuriatingly beautiful mark on his chin, carving a ravine between his eyebrows.

Obito wishes he could take a photo, blow it up, and hang it on his wall.  He knows he’s probably picking a fight—knows it’s probably long overdue—but this moment is worth the risk of blowing up the very small good thing he’s managed to unpack from his past.

Of course, Kakashi does not handle discomfort well.  Obito doesn’t need a therapist to tell him that.  Kakashi is a man who thrives on control, and Obito’s revelation has clearly thrown him.  It doesn’t take long for lovely confusion to break apart, resettle itself against Kakashi’s features as something vicious.

“Fuck you, I didn’t come here to be insulted,” he says.

Obito’s grin widens.  “But you did come here to fuck me, though.”  He chuckles, and Kakashi spins on his heels.  Before he can snatch up his takeout and head back out into the hall, Obito grabs the bag first and holds it out of his reach.

An impressive feat, if Obito does say so himself, considering they’re close in height but Kakashi definitely has longer arms.  He’s always been built like a swimmer, lanky with a broad chest and narrow hips.

“Stop being such an asshole,” Kakashi says, grabbing for the bag and missing as Obito passes it to his other hand behind his back.

“Don’t be such a fragile little flower,” Obito chides, “take a little criticism for once in your life.”

Kakashi’s face hardens and he stops trying to reach for his food, which Obito knows probably means he’s gone too far, pushed some invisible button too hard.  Rather than acknowledge that; rather than walk himself back or apologize, he simply opens the bag of food in his hands, maintaining uncomfortably intense eye contact with Kakashi as he reaches in, grabs the first food-shaped thing he finds, and brings it to his mouth.

He gags when it hits his tongue, spits it half-chewed right back into the bag without any concern for the rest of its contents.

When he glares at Kakashi, nose wrinkling, pulling his facial scars in a way that tugs uncomfortably at the unmarred flesh of his face, Obito expects to see the same sharp and acerbic glare from a moment ago.

Instead, what he finds is mirth—light dancing in Kakashi’s dark eyes as his mouth splits into a smile, revealing his perfect teeth.  Obito knows his left canine is false, but it’s hard to tell since the rest of his smile is just as dazzlingly white.  And as Kakashi tilts his head back, the apple of his throat jumping wildly in time with his laughter, he wheezes out a high-pitched, “Serves you right!” and then keeps on laughing.

Obito supposes it does, to some extent.  But how was he supposed to know Kakashi Hatake, well-established hater of all things even remotely dessert-like, would be carrying coffee cake in his to-go bag?  Obito keeps sticking out his tongue, like exposure to the air will somehow cleanse the taste from his mouth.  He must look like a frog; a big dumb amphibian who snapped its tongue out only to realize it caught a stink bug.

He tosses the bag back onto the counter, content to have it as far from his person as possible.  “I thought you hated sweets.”

“I do,” Kakashi says, finally regaining some semblance of stoicism.  “It’s for my neighbor.”

Obito frowns.  “Since when have you been that social?”

Kakashi shrugs, but says nothing.  Typical.

They stand there, awkward and unmoving, for several long seconds.  Obito can feel sweat prickling at his nape, his temples.  He has no clue what he’s supposed to say, now.

Do you still get to fuck someone after you’ve told them they reek and then spit half-masticated baked goods back into their extremely kind bag of neighborly good will?

Probably not, which is disappointing.

Is he supposed to open the box, splay the contents across his floors so they can examine all the missing pieces?  Try to fit them back together?

Obito decides that isn’t something he’s ready to do.  That whatever exists between them, now, is still too new, too fragile, to bear the weight.  One day, maybe, it will be strong enough.  But not now.

Mercifully, Kakashi clears his throat, which clears the air enough for him to ask, “Why haven’t’ you ever said anything?”

“About what?” Obito asks, realizing a moment too late that he’s fucking dumb.

Kakashi knows, too, and infuses as much incredulity into his clarification as possible, each syllable dripping with a sickly-sweet undertone of are you fucking kidding.  “You said I smell, Obito.  All the time.  Why didn’t you tell me before?”

There’s no truly easy answer.  Because of course, Obito thinks Kakashi smells like burnt piss, but he doesn’t actually.  What he smells like is coffee, which is a perfectly reasonable thing to smell like, probably.

Assuming Kakashi drinks the stuff because if he doesn’t, then what the fuck?

“I hate the smell of coffee,” Obito says finally, after Kakashi reaches out and flicks him on the forehead for taking too long to answer.  He rubs at the spot where he’s sure the gesture has left a red smudge on his skin.  “You always smell like fucking coffee.”

Obito isn’t sure what he expects Kakashi’s response to be.  More incredulity, maybe.  Irritation.  Hands thrown up in the air and then a purposeful march out of his apartment.  An annoying dissertation on why coffee is wonderful and Obito is wrong.

Instead, Kakashi grins like a very smug cat, takes a step forward and presses his forehead to Obito’s, arms crossed over his chest like the smug, self-assured bastard he has (almost) always been.

Obito bristles, mostly because the move is unfamiliar.  For all Kakashi enjoys making people uncomfortable, he typically uses his words to do so.  The proximity of him, the coffee smell and the warmth of his skin and the faint tickle of his breath as he leans close to Obito’s ear are things typically reserved for the duration of their sex and that’s all.

Kakashi doesn’t like being close to people.  Obito understands why, respects the boundary for the most part.  He nearly topples backward trying to maintain any semblance of space between their bodies.

Then Kakashi rasps almost alluringly against his ear, “I own a fucking coffee shop, you dumbass.”

It occurs to Obito in that moment he has never bothered to ask where Kakashi works.  Their first meeting at that bar replays in his mind and he recalls Kakashi asking him what he did for a living, but Obito had gotten distracted by his momentary embarrassment and never returned the favor.

He groans loudly, leaning his forehead against Kakashi’s shoulder, which jostles as he chuckles at Obito’s expense.  Obito snorts, a short, half-hearted attempt at that self-deprecating humor he has so perfected over the years.  “Figures I’d fall for someone who smells like my least favorite thing.”

He pulls away, flustered and embarrassed.  The heat of his face is probably enough to warm that coffee cake like it’s fresh from the oven.  Obito wonders suddenly if the cake came from Kakashi’s shop.  Wonders where the shop is and what it’s like inside.

If they serve anything other than fucking coffee.

Kakashi’s fingers are rough against Obito’s jaw as he pulls him in for their first kiss of the day, but the kiss itself is gentle.  He doesn’t open his mouth, isn’t as greedy or demanding as usual.  And Obito relishes the temporary softening, the tender moment offered to him.  He clings to Kakashi’s shirt and tries to breathe as little as possible so the coffee stench won’t invade his nostrils.

Though, he must admit, at the moment, he cares a hell of a lot less than usual.  Because Kakashi’s kisses are delicate and coaxing, one hand skimming over Obito’s scars with a carefulness that makes his chest ache.

A carefulness he has never experienced before, not with anyone, and especially not with the man he knows deems himself responsible for their existence.

Obito pulls away first, finally in such desperate need of a full breath he can’t hold out any longer.  He doesn’t pull far, though, just enough to let his lungs expand without restriction.  And when his eyes meet Kakashi’s, the light in them is still there, less twinkling and steadier.

A porch light welcoming him home, peeling away the shadows to reveal safety and comfort.

“Let’s take a bath,” Kakashi says quietly, grinning.

Obito has the decency to laugh.  It’s a convenient enough sound, anyway, one which hopefully drowns out the erratic thudding his chest.  The hammer beat of a heart only now realizing Kakashi didn’t run away when Obito said he was falling, didn’t put up the cool partition Obito is so used to running up against every time he tries to open up, to be opened.

To drag the box out and bring its contents back into the light.

The tub is not large enough for two grown men.  Not really.  But they Tetris their limbs into the basin as well as they can, tangling together like brambles—perhaps just as prickly—and laughing at their own foolishness in unison.

“It’s smells like a department store in here.”

Obito splashes the scented water at Kakashi, who squints and spits.  “I need all the eucalyptus and lavender I can get my hands on to wash out your coffee shop’s stench.”

Kakashi leans back against the tub with a serene smile and closes his eyes.  “You should come visit sometime,” he offers and Obito knows it’s no small thing to be invited into Kakashi’s life even such a minor way.  He looks up to wink at Obito through the steam of the bathwater.  “Maybe not on roasting day, though.”

“You couldn’t pay me.”

His therapist will probably still tell Obito this is an unhealthy attachment at their next session.  But Obito thinks today is a step in the right direction, at least.  A limping movement toward the honesty that comes so hard to them both.

Maybe they can figure the rest out together, peel back all the layers and scars until they are raw and open to each other.  Until they can repair all the marks of their shared past, their fractured future.  Maybe.  Someday.

Obito likes the idea that his past and his future might yet be able to exist together.  That one day there won’t be any dusty boxes he has to carry around, regrets and secrets stuffed between tabs of moldy cardboard.  He likes the idea that maybe he and Kakashi can unpack together.  Build a bonfire afterward and burn away all the shit they no longer need to hold onto.

The smoke would smell better than coffee, at least.  And as long as Kakashi agrees to take a bath when he comes over, Obito thinks they just might be able to make this work.