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gubler-me-up · 4 years ago

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Perfectionism

Request: HELLOO, I’ve had an idea for literally months in my head but I wouldn’t be able to write it as good as you 🥺 Would you mind doing a Spencer reaction to his crush having bad body dysmorphia that they’ve been hiding from the team (they’re working for bau) but at a case or smn someone they’re interviewing comments negatively on their body and they break down once they think they’re alone? But Spence sees and reaches out and it’s really wholesome and soft? I’m a sucker for angsty fluff I’m sorry 😔

A/N: Thanks for the prompt anon, much appreciated! I hope this does justice to your well thought-out idea. I hope it satisfies all your angsty fluff needs! Side note, to everyone of my followers/readers I hope you know you’re beautiful and finding love/happiness within yourself takes time, but trust the process, loves ❤️ Enjoy!

Category: Angsty fluff

Content warning: Swearing, mention of violence, self degradation

Word count: 2.3k

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You stood in front of the mirror inside the police department’s washroom. You finished applying another thick layer of foundation on your face. You knew applying this much makeup to your face wasn’t good. Your dermatologist even recommended against it and advised you to let your skin breathe for a while to prevent over clogging your pores. He didn’t understand the problem of doing that though.

Without the concealer masking the dark circles under your eyes, you’d probably look dead. Maybe even worse. Without the foundation, your acne and healing acne scars would definitely bring unwanted attention to your face. It was certain to happen.

You had to wear them all the time, especially at work. You thought of how JJ probably never had to go through this. Her face was free of any sort of marks or blemishes. She always looked alive with her bright blue eyes with no heavy bags insight. No wonder Spencer had a crush on her a few years back.

Your thoughts were interrupted by the vibrations of your phone on the bathroom counter. You looked down to see Spencer’s name pop up informing you it was time to interview the suspect. A sigh left your mouth as you started packing up your products into your travel beauty kit.

As you walked out of the door, you noticed Spencer at the end of the poorly lit hall leading back out to the main lobby. When he noticed you were walking down the hall towards him, he smiled and waved. Sometimes you thought he was the cutest genius in the world.

“Hey, didn’t know you were waiting for me,” you said.

He shrugged. “Thought it would be nice for us to walk to the interview room together.”

You raised an eyebrow. “Oh?”

He nodded as you both started walking towards the interview room. You couldn’t help noticing he kept on looking at you. Especially your face. What if he saw your acne scars? Or even the acne itself? What if he was just noticing how strange your face looked?

You stopped walking. “Why do you keep staring at me?”

He stopped walking as well as he gave you a questionable look. “What?”

“Is there a reason you keep looking at my face?” You asked.

He shook his head. “No, no reason, I just-”

“You just what?” You said before he even finished his sentence.

Spencer was taken back by your tone. Your words made it seem as if he was attacking you. You could tell from his confused facial expression. Before he could get a chance to pull his words together, you started walking again.

“Forget it. Let’s just focus on this interview.”

Spencer watched as you walked by him. He trailed behind you, trying his best not to say anything else. You knew you shouldn’t have snapped at him the way you did, but you couldn’t bear the possibility of him pointing out a flaw. You just knew he could see everything you tried so hard to hide.

As you two reached the interview room door you felt Spencer gently grab your arm. You turned to him to see how concerned he looked. Before you said anything he made sure to get the first few words out.

“Y/N, I’m sorry if I made you feel uncomfortable back there. Whatever’s troubling you I’m here to help you get through it,” he assured you.

You smiled. “Thanks. I appreciate you, Spence. For now, let’s put what happened behind us for now and go interview this guy.”

Reid smiled as he gently squeezed your arm before letting you go. It felt nice having him reassure you, but he didn’t even know what he was reassuring you about. Maybe he didn’t notice your facial imperfections at all. Maybe he was genuinely admiring your face.

You opened up the interview room to see a dark-haired, middle-aged, white man sitting across the table. He was well put together with a buttoned-up blue shirt, black tie and his hair was slicked back. Physically he matched the profile perfectly. He looked as if he exuded arrogance as your profile detected the unsure would be like. He tried to keep a cool and emotionless demeanour, but by his furrowed eyebrows and wrinkling forehead, he was becoming impatient.

“Hello, I’m agent Y/N Y/L/N and this is Dr. Spencer Reid. Adam Boyer, correct?” You said as you and Spencer took your seats.

“Glad you can read documents, agent,” he scoffed.

“I wouldn’t get so smart-mouthed yet, Boyer. According to some sketchy transactions between you, John McNeil and Robert Morrison it seems as if you have a lot to hide for someone so vocal,” you said.

He squinted his eyes at you. “What does this even have to do with anything?”

“I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but those two men are dead. You were the last person to contact both of them the day they died. A transaction of over half a million dollars goes missing and you get mad and-“

“I don’t know what you’re trying to imply, agent, but I didn’t murder my colleagues over money. My company makes more than that in a day, so spare me of your pathetic accusations.”

Before you could reply, Spencer jumped in to level out the tension between you and Boyer. He opened a file on the desk and pointed to a bank statement.

“It says here on your financial records your company is $1.5 million dollars in debt. We discovered Robert Morrison and John McNeil both gave you back their shares of the company to equate $500,000, which is legally a breach in the company’s contract for workers, including yourself, to share, distribute or give away company shares without a reasonable cause. According to the list of reasonable cause you failed to mention bankruptcy or were too arrogant at the time to force something like that happening to you,” Spencer said.

With everything he said, you could tell Boyer’s cool exterior was wearing off. He looked glossier in the face, started fidgeting with his tie and refused to look directly at Spencer. He decided to direct his attention to you instead.

“Well, isn’t that a huge mistake on my part, ain’t it?” He asked directly to you.

“Huge mistake or huge flaw in your plan of getting away with murdering your colleagues? I think it’s the second one, Boyer,” you said.

He leaned back in his chair without breaking any eye contact with you. He folded his hand in front of his chest. You had to admit he made your feel a bit uncomfortable.

“What else do you think?” He asked.

“I think you murdered your colleagues when they found out you had taken back their share of the company to pay back your debts. They would have ratted you out, got you fired from your own company or even worse, the whole company would have shut down and you’d have nothing left.”

“Nothing left,” Boyer said seemingly to himself.

“Yes, absolutely nothing. Your wife divorced you, took full custody of your two boys and now you spend your days throwing your money-approximately $1.5 million dollars-on trying to buy love from escorts,” you said.

It was as if something had woken up inside of him as he almost pounced across the table. Both you and Spencer got out of your seats with Spencer using his arm to block the front of you. It was as if it was a natural instinct for him to protect you before bracing himself.

“Sit down,” Spencer demanded.

“At least I have escorts willing to ride my dick. You couldn’t even pay a male stripper to look at that face of yours. Where’s the pretty agent who was in here before? If I’m going to be accused of a crime, I’d rather be accused by someone half decent looking. Get my fucking lawyer on the phone,” he proceeded to yell.

Though you shouldn’t have felt as bad as you did by the words he said, you did. The blunt force in his voice was vicious. The way he looked at you in disgust. His disgust was too real. He was bold enough to look at you the way everyone wanted to, but was too cautious to do it in front of your face.

“I’ll get your lawyer on the phone, you psycho,” you whispered before turning around to leave.

“Don’t forget to bring the real eye candy in as well, sweetheart,” he said.

You didn’t bother looking back at him or even Spencer. You felt your eyes get heavy with tears and knew it would be terrible to show weakness to such a vile suspect. You rushed out of the room before Spencer could stop you or even follow you close behind.

You rushed towards the washroom as your tears were at the brim of your eyes. As you reached the door, you paused. What if someone was in there? What if Emily or JJ saw you crying? You retracted your steps and decided to go to the family washroom instead.

You didn’t even wait until the door was fully closed before letting out your tears. You heavily wept to yourself as you replayed everything he had said to you. Spencer probably stood there agreeing with everything he said, word for word. Your face being hideous, JJ’s beauty surpassing the little you had, no one wanting you. You backed up against the wall to avoid the mirror, to avoid the disgusting reflection in the mirror.

The only reason you looked up was that you heard the washroom door open. You saw Spencer peak in. When he saw the tears running down your face, he didn’t hesitate to go over to you with concern written all over his face.

“Y/N, what’s wrong? I hope he didn’t get to you,” he said as he reached out his hands.

You assumed he was going to try to wipe the tears from your face, so you pushed away his hands. You couldn’t stand the thought of him touching your face if he thought it was hideous. You didn’t even want him looking at you directly. You looked down to avoid your face being in the presence of his.

He attempted to lift your head up by placing his hand on your chin. You flinched at his touch and moved your head out of his grasp. New tears started to spill from your eyes as you looked at him with despair.

“Can you stop, Spencer?” You wept.

He looked at you confused. “Stop what?”

“Looking at me. I know my face is ugly, okay? Everyone knows and it’s just degrading for you to pretend not to notice,” you snapped at him.

“Y/N, what are you talking about? There’s nothing wrong with your face.”

“Spencer, I know you see it. My acne and acne scars. It doesn’t help that my face is always shiny and my cheeks are chubby. You don’t have to pretend to be blind to it for the sake of my feelings.”

“You thought I was looking at you earlier because you think I think you’re ugly? Y/N that couldn’t be further from the truth.”

You rolled your eyes. “Then why were you looking at me? Be honest.”

“Because I think you’re gorgeous.”

“Ugh, Spencer, you don-”

He grabbed both your hands in his big ones, grasping them tightly. You looked down at your hands in his and then looked up into his eyes. He looked longingly at you. You could see the genuine look of love in his face.

“Y/N, I know what you’re going through. Body dysmorphia’s not an easy thing to fight off by yourself, but I want to assure you every day that I think you’re the most beautiful person I know; both inside and out.”

You let out a deep breath as you felt round three of tears coming to your eyes. Honestly, you couldn’t think of a moment you felt genuinely pretty. His words could move mountains.

“But if Adam Boyer could-”

“Please don’t let a psychopath make you feel unsure of yourself. He only belittled you because he lost control of the situation and decided to target you. His idea of a perfect girl is someone he can dominate, which makes him disgusting not you.”

He let go of your right hand as he wiped away a tear making its way down your face. You grasped his left hand hard as he touched your face. It still made you feel uncomfortable, but you were happy Spencer cared deeply for you.

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have touched your face if you’re not comfortable with that yet. I know it takes time to breakdown this idea of what perfect is especially with so many beauty standards being pushed by society, but I’ll be here to help you realize you’re the most beautiful you. I wouldn’t want you to be any other way,” he said.

You smiled at his words as you wiped away the few stray tears running down your face. You had to admit you liked it better when he did it. You leaned your head back, took a deep breath, let it out and then looked at Spencer.

“Thank you for being you. I wouldn’t want you to be any other way as well,” you said.

He smiled. “I’ll always be here for you, Y/N. If you want me to be that is.”

“I do. I really do.”

“Maybe after we’re done with this case we can do something together to help you remember the beautiful person you are.”

“I’d love that.”

You both walked towards the washroom door. Spencer made sure not to let go of your hand until you two left the washroom. You felt as if he wanted you to grasp onto the positive energy he had for you. You felt uplifted in a way. This must be the benefit of the Spencer Reid effect.

—–

MASTERLIST

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the-necessary-unnecessary · 4 years ago

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Mapi Leon's coming out story: the impact of words.

Being the first professional Spanish women’s footballer playing in Spain to publicly come out she caused waves amongst the media and general public (Laura del Rio had previously given interviews about her sexuality but that only when she had moved to the US to play). I have translated the article in which she came out on this day two years ago below because google translate won’t do it justice, but I also wanted to give a bit of backstory about the impact that her coming out had. Now Mapi isn’t just any Spanish player, although obviously not that well-known, she made headlines for being the first female Spanish player to have a transfer fee attached to her when she moved from Atletico to Barça. The fact that she had a higher profile than most other players makes her coming out so publicly even more of a big deal, because her larger platform meant she had more to lose but also meant she understood the power of her words in influencing her audience. Although people just living their lives on social media and casually mentioning their same-sex partners in interviews without a coming out moment is very important, her doing an interview for the national press openly talking about coming out as well as discussing her footballing career is essential too.

Six months after coming out she did another interview talking about the reception that she got on social media after coming out. She said that ‘she didn’t stop receiving messages: “Thank You”, “I saw you and you gave me strength”, “I’m not alone”. Women and Men from all over Spain recognised her gesture and saw themselves reflected in it. “I read them all, but I wasn’t able to reply. I didn’t think that it would turn into something so important for so many people.”’ Her coming out resulted in her being invited to be part of the opening events of Madrid Pride 2018. “When I came out publicly, I became aware of the significance of the action, and that it was much bigger than a single moment or my private life.” She also recognised how different parts of Spain reacted dissimilarly to her coming out and being a public figurehead: “In Barcelona they said ‘well okay great,’ but maybe in less urban areas like Zaragoza [where she is originally from] it wasn’t all like that”, even if bigger cities are more accepting there are places that needed to hear her words more.

Not only was it an influential moment in many supporters’ lives, she also had an impact within the women’s football community itself. She said that as a result of her coming out she saw “more photos, more nods towards players being in relationships with women on social media… as if now one’s sexuality matters even less [in women’s football]. Before you shied away a bit, at the end of the day we’re footballers, not just people, we represent a club, a country, a supporters base… and maybe that was why there was a bit of shyness online. Now I see that everything is done more naturally, without shouting about it on rooftops, but indirectly doing just that.” Even though she didn’t know how much of an impact her words would have at the time, her coming out story helped so many people and continues to be a beacon in Spanish LGBTQ+ visibility – which isn’t always as holistic as it’s sometimes portrayed to be on here.

I have left the translated version of her initial coming out news article below the cut.

Woso Pride Month 2020 [Day 23/30]

FC Barcelona’s defender is left-footed like Messi, she’s just one the Copa de la Reina and in August she will be called up to the national team. She thinks that it is important to “stand up for everyone’s rights”

“I was never very into dolls. I preferred to play ball with my brother and his friends.” And did you beat them? “Well, if I had been bad at it the boys would have kicked me out.” Maria Pilar León is tenacious and tough, perhaps that’s why she’s a centre-back. This blonde 23 year old woman kicks a ball with her left foot like Messi, has a tattoo sleeve on her arm that reminds one of Sergio Ramos’ and they compare her with Piqué due to the ease she has with playing the ball out of the penalty box… although at first sight she looks more like Shakira. Like them, she steps onto the pitch with the fierceness of a warrior. Only a few weeks ago she won the Copa de la Reina with Barça, a goal in the last 10 seconds of the final gave them the victory over Atletico de Madrid. There’s another trait that makes her similar to those footballing icons: she openly and naturally lives with her sexuality, for she also likes women. “And there’s no issue with that. This is who I am and there’s nothing wrong about it”.

Mapi, like they call her on the pitch, doesn’t want life to catch her offside. In a sporting environment with notoriety of being sexist and chauvinist, she wants to score a goal against homophobia. “When you’re a public figure, you have some sort of responsibility. I think that it’s important to stand up for everyone’s rights, there is no need to hide. We often hear pretty disgusting things in football stadiums, not only homophobic slurs but also racist ones, and I believe that we – as the people in sport – need to send a clear message about tolerance and against hatred.” Fair play was about this.

Here we can return to the first paragraph. Mapi is tenacious and tough, she’s also brave and not only on the pitch. You need a lot of courage to talk publicly about something that male footballers are silent about. “I can understand their silence given how chauvinistic football can be. There are a lot of closed-minded people who would insult them, although that kind of insults tell you more about who says them… There’s a lot of pressure in a match, you have to be extremely concentrated and to stand up to that kind of thing is tough. So, in that sense, I understand why they don’t come out. But, on the other hand, it’s something so natural that it escapes me for as to why they don’t do it, I think if they were open the mentality would change bit by bit. In this sense, we have to move forward and progress.”

Chants such as “Michel, Guti (or whoever else), faggot” are common place in stadiums, but Mapi rests assure that she has never suffered from any homophobia on the pitch. “It’s true that there are players whose parents think that this is an illness, but I’ve been lucky in this respect. My parents told me that they would love whoever I loved. And never have I been insulted by anyone nor nothing like that. Maybe it’s because football is, above everything, chauvinistic and sexist. So the bottom line is that a lot of people aren’t thrilled that we women play. I guess those that come and see our matches a more in favour of equality. They are more open minded. They like seeing us play, they enjoy it.

And it’s true, every year more and more people enjoy women’s football. In other countries, like the US, the sport is clearly booming. 1,500 universities have their own teams and there are stars, like Alex Morgan, who take photos alongside Messi. In Spain the situation is a lot more modest, although it is beginning to change. Mapi, for example, has almost 45,000 followers on Instagram. A lot more than well-known actors like Bárbara Lennie or Emma Suárez. “Yes, one could say that I have fans. There are three girls who always come and see me play. It’s pretty cool when you see them with your shirt on. Thanks to her speed and her tactical intelligence she is one of the leading figures in the Liga [now Primera] Iberdrola. In fact, she was the first female Spanish player to be a paid transfer in women’s football. Barça paid 50,000 euros for her transfer from Atletico de Madrid. A big milestone for women’s sport, and something that felt impossible to this woman who collected Ronaldinho stickers when she was younger.

“I wouldn’t be able to explain to you what I felt when they signed me, I felt complete joy. It meant that I hadn’t be mistaken in choosing football as a career. To be honest I wasn’t a great student, I scraped through. In the 4th year of ESO [Year 11/Grade 10] one of my teachers always said: ‘be careful because next time you might not pass…’ He basically told me that I wasted too much time by playing sports and I should stop playing football. Now I think about him a lot. He didn’t see me having a future, but I stuck with my passion and it ended up being the right decision.”

Mapi has played since she was a young girl, but her career started when she was 17, when Real Club Deportivo Español made her an offer. She was forced to leave her parents, Javier the mechanic and Pilar, a caregiver, in Zaragoza and jump into this adventure head first. “They were sad that I left home, but they always supported me.” The next season she received an offer from Atletico de Madrid. With them she won the league. And from there came the famous signing with Barcelona. Now, having finished the season, the centre-back will meet up with the national team to train for two matches in preparation for the 2019 World Cup in France. They have already qualified and are ready to bring the cup home. “Hopefully the men will also win in Russia”.

QUESTION.- Don’t you fear your club’s or the Federation’s reaction after talking about you being homosexual? You are the first professional player in the league to talk about it publicly…

ANSWER.- I don’t think it will be a problem. My personal life is my own and shouldn’t bother anyone else. I hope that they will support it because football needs to start opening itself up. If there are now people who are openly homosexual even in government, how could there not be homosexual people on football pitches?

Q.- And in the changing rooms? Could that not be weird? Prejudices still exist…

A.- I once talked to a [male] friend about this. He got quite caught up about it, but it’s stupid. Your teammates are like family, like sisters. With the tension you have about a match you aren’t focusing on whether they’re looking at you or that kind of thing. There’s a lot of familiarity between us.

In some ways, Mapi has cracked a glass roof, but the financial figures that women’s football deal with, compared to the ones the men deal with, are still ridiculous. A mediocre player in La Liga can win around a million euros per season, whilst most female players earn around a thousand euros per month. There are agencies, such as Carlos Rodríguez’s UPro, who manages Mapi, that try to improve the situation, but the gap here remains an abyss. “There’s always a lot of talk about the difference in salaries between women’s and men’s football. I understand that they earn a lot of money because they generate that kind of money and I’m not against that. Although it’s also true that the figures are exorbitant, everything has got exponentially higher… In the end, we do the same that they do. We dedicate the same amount of time to the game but few follow us, it may be the case that people like us but what’s missing is more promotion.

Q.- For example Doña Letizia didn’t go to the Copa de la Reina final [this means the Queen’s Cup. Leticia is the Queen of Spain and the men’s tournament called Copa del Rey after the King is always attended by him]

A.- I don’t know why she didn’t attend it. Maybe she wasn’t made aware of it, but if the King goes to the guy’s cup final she should come to ours as it carriers her name. It would really help up as it would attract a lot of attention in the press. Hopefully she’ll go next year [Spoiler: she did!]

Q.- Your male counterparts are currently playing in the World Cup hosted in Russia, a country that has a legislation which contains a crackdown on LGBT rights. What do you think about a competition like this one being played in a country like that?

A.- It’s a mistake. In some way it seems like they’re backing the homophobic legislation. In Chechnya there have been concentration camps for homosexuals and that’s something that Putin tolerates. We shouldn’t look away when presented face to face with such issues. This isn’t only about LGBT rights; these are human rights. That’s not the message of tolerance and respect that sport, and specifically football, should affiliate itself with.

Mapi is very certain about this. The match against homophobia in football can be won. She has scored the first goal. Now what’s left to do is for a lot of other athletes to join the team.

#its long but so so worth the read #talks about many things not just her coming out #the interviewer is clearly a bit clueless at points but eh mapi makes it worth it #mapi leon #mapi león #espwnt #fcb femeni #fc barcelona femeni #spain wnt #primera iberdrola #my translation #og #lgbt #lgbtq+#woso pride month 2020

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dangermousie · 5 years ago

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2019 END OF YEAR KDrama Post

Wow, I haven’t made one in years. This is going to involve only dramas that came out in 2019 because I watched a hell of a lot dramas made prior to that and trying to figure out which ones will give me a headache.

DRAMAS WATCHED (In order of liking from most to least as opposed to pure quality; I am including if I’ve seen at least two eps AND feel it was enough to make up my mind; yes I realize that’s inaccurate, but that’s my list)

Extraordinary You - A philosophy and religion course AND a love story, and perfect at both.

My Country - a brutal, passionate, intense masterpiece of a sageuk. This is how they should be.

Crash Landing On You - the two eps that have aired brought my joy in watching kdramas back to me so vividly. This is everything.

Encounter - the perfect noona romance of the year for me. It seems to have little plot (powerful older woman, idealistic younger man) but the characters made me love them with an unhealthy amount of attachment and the mood is just perfect.

Haechi - smart traditional sageuk with a heart. This one will make you love it but also respect it in the morning :)

Queen: Love and War - Period, romance, mystery, helpless king and feisty heroine. It’s everything I love in one package.

Chocolate - if, like me, you like slow old-school melo with genuine grown-ups, this one is for you. Ha Ji Won and Yoon Kye Sang are both incandescent in this.

One Spring Night - a rare slice of life that worked for me so so much. I rooted for the main OTP like crazy (I did skip all the sister stuff though because boring to me.) It’s just a breath of fresh air.

The Tale of Nokdu - a rare funny youth sageuk that worked for me (except, ironically, for when they tried to be politics-heavy and serious about it.) Wonderful OTP, funny situations and just generally a delight.

Memories of the Alhambra - I can hear people screaming that I put this so high, but this is a faves ranking, not objective one, and I loved the unusual premise (it ultimately fell apart but it tried), and Hyun Bin’s performance was out of this world and the aaaaagnst and I enjoyed waiting for it each week until almost the end. That ending though!!!!!

Psychopath Diary - this is black comedy at its best and hysterical and smart and somehow got me invested in the hapless protagonist.

Hotel del Luna - clever and funny and smart. Hong Sisters largely back to form. I found the sageuk parts more engaging than modern ones, but what else is new.

Search WWW - some parts of it worked for me more than others, but it had solid writing and cool characters and some interesting OTP(s).

Love is Beautiful Life is Wonderful - has the weekend drama slowness but it lovely and fun.

When the Camellia Blooms - it was well made and the OTP was great and the acting top notch, I just don’t tend to go gaga for slice of life dramas, especially ones involving market ladies, much.

Flower Crew Joseon Marriage Agency - competently done, pretty period piece about nothing. It was enjoyable and forgettable at once.

Catch the Ghost - I put it as high as I did because the OTP really did have lovely chemistry but the story was a complete mess, the police work made no sense and the heroine’s character was like nails on a chalkboard for me.

Joseon Survival - I got about four episodes in and liked it a lot but then Kang Ji Hwan turned out to be a convicted rapist, they replaced the lead and I didn’t go back. I kind of want to because I liked what I saw and I am madly curious as to whether they changed the main character or just said he had a different face now, no explanation.

The Last Empress - pure inconsistent trash but so entertaining!

Vagabond - I made it eight episodes in before I realized that I would have as much fun staring at traffic. It’s a competently done actioner but without more, actioners never work for me, so this was a viewer/drama mismatch.

Arthdal Chronicles - incoherent, visually odd and boring, this is arguably the worst drama this year but I am giving it higher place because the cast really tries (even if it tends to fail because it has nothing to work with) and because it attempted something different even if it failed spectacularly. SO BAD.

Melting Me Softly - yes, my brain was fully melted by this soulless, charmless waste of Ji Chang Wook and my limited free time.

VIP - Any drama that makes the main mystery and thrust of the story who the husband cheated on his wife with is BORING. Seriously, this is not exactly Hercule Poirot. They wasted their cast - I have NO idea why Lee Sang Yoon agreed to be in this as a one note character and Jang Nara is playing a second scorned wife in a row but without even the entertainment value of her previous outing.

Abyss - aptly named. The best thing I can say about it is it didn’t offend me but oh boy was it dull.

Absolute Boyfriend - I loved the manga but it’s time to accept this can never be adapted well. They wasted the cast and that ending was just an insult on top of a trash heap.

The Lies Within - you cast that cast and deliberately have no romance. You are dead to me.

Woman of 9.9 Billion - competently made, but it’s everything I dislike - dour unpleasant bored people behaving as if they are in a particularly dreary art-house French movie but without any nuance or interest the latter came provide.

Love with Flaws - shrill, dumb, neither acted nor written by anyone trying at all.

Rookie Historian Goo Hae Ryung - objectively, it’s not the worst drama on the list, but it’s everything I hate in one package - willfully ahistorical but not cleverly so, male lead incapable of acting, the characters so one-dimensional they disappear, this purports to be a period drama but about as period as a space ship. God, I loathed this.

FAVORITE DRAMA

Extraordinary You - smart (so mind-bendingly smart) and moving and totally unpredictable and with so many things to say about free will and religion and self and nature of memory and narrative, this had an insane impossible premise and yet somehow managed to do it full justice and stick the landing.

WORST DRAMA

People with Flaws - this is different from least favorite because even if I loathed e.g., Rookie Historian or Woman of 9.9 Billion, I recognized some positive features; it’s just certain things really rubbed me the wrong way due to personal preferences. But this shrill hot mess of a drama is really everything that’s wrong with dramaworld.

FAVORITE MALE CHARACTER

Prince Yeoning, Haechi - fiercely smart, strong, tormented by the duality of his birth (royal father, servant mother) but not letting this distract him from his purpose, loyal to the bone, and with integrity nothing can shake but where you can feel that it’s not easy and that it costs him.

FAVORITE FEMALE CHARACTER

Eun Dan Oh, Extraordinary You - a go-getter who remakes the world (literally); smart, cheerful, strong, beautifully human. She feels so real and yet is larger than anything around her.

NEEDS TO BE MURDERED

Yi Seung Gye, My Country - a sociopath destroying lives in his quest for power and control, even the destruction of his own family barely gives him anything but momentary pause. He is the reason for the tragedy of MC.

FAVORITE SHIP

Eun Dan Oh x Haru, Extraordinary You - their love is literally universe and god-defying. They have loved each other as different people in three separate worlds (and counting), and have defied loss of memory and even loss of self as well as death, the end of worlds, and their god and the narrative and literally anything and everything, to be together.

Runner Up: Soo Hyun x Jin Hyuk, Encounter: tender and decent and his bringing her back to vivid life and the way they love and support and compliment each other.

Probably gonna be on list if doesn’t go haywire: Crash Landing on You: she is a SK heiress, he’s a NK officer, they have mad chemistry and so much potential.

NOTP:

Tae Mi x Morgan, Search WWW - love the actors, love the chemistry, love the characters in terms of the way they are written, but they are absolutely wrong for each other and there is no future of any sort but misery ahead. None of their issues are resolved but are swept under the rug. It’s a cautionary tale, not a romance. I did a long rant before so not repeating.

BEST SECONDARY OTP

Scarlett x Ji Hwan, Search WWW - they stole the shippiness in the drama for me. Cooky and adorable and noona romance done right.

FAVORITE SCENE

Haru’s final disappearance, Extraordinary You - the lights start to go out, the world literally dissolving, Eun Oh and Haru clinging to each other, with his telling her she was his beginning and the end. His name, the one she gave him, is the last thing he hears. In a drama full of amazing scenes the very gist of which was defying the very creator and universe and meaning of existence, this was the one that stayed with me the most.

BIGGEST CRUSH

Seo Hwi, My Country - I have a thing for deeply honorable, deeply tortured period badasses with long hair and a death wish (see Choi Young in Faith etc.)

BEST SCENE STEALER CHARACTER

Yi Bang Won, My Country - he started out as an antihero and ended up as arguably a tragic villain (or maybe still an anti-hero) but oh boy, was he magnetic and fascinating and sucking out all the oxygen whenever he was in the scene.

NEEDS A SEQUEL

Memories of the Alhambra - WTF ending was that?! All that misery and no real resolution?! Dammit!

TROPE THAT NEEDS TO DIE

Youth Sageuk - I hate most of them! They are anachronistic and dumb and honestly, what is the point of having fully modern people in period clothes? Just make a modern show and call it a day.

BIGGEST DISAPPOINTMENT

Melting Me Softly - Ji Chang Wook’s first project back from the military was an unfunny, unmoving, pointless mess with not an ounce of genuine enjoyment despite the excellent pedigree of everyone involved in front and behind the camera.

Arthdal Chronicles - the makers made excellent Queen Seon Duk, Tree with Deep Roots and Six Flying Dragons. The cast was uniformly A grade. The result was an open-ended, boring, incoherent mess that looks like a bad sort of a drug trip and made about as much sense.

BIGGEST GOOD SURPRISE

Extraordinary You - I had zero interest in yet another high school drama with no actors I recognized. By the end, EY was an emotional brainy twister of a marvel that became my favorite drama of all time. I’ve been watching dramas for over 13 years so that’s saying something.

2019 DRAMAS I HAVEN’T SEEN THAT I MOST WANT TO WATCH

The Crowned Clown - I love sageuks and cast and it looks so smart and emotional

Angel’s Last Mission: Love - my next contemporary - I watched a little and loved what I saw

Fates and Furies - I saw a few eps and classic melo is so up my alley.

Clean with a Passion for Now - I like the cast and it’s a year of falling for hot weird bosses apparently.

Graceful Family - I love makjang and Im Soo Jung.

The Secret Life of My Secretary - downmarket Beauty Inside and I loved BI.

Love Affairs in the Afternoon - artsy adultery FTW

Item - I don’t like crime stuff but I am here for Joo Ji Hoon.

My Strange Hero - seems a little cooky but I am fond of Yoo Seung Ho.

MOST ANTICIPATED IN 2020

King: the Eternal Monarch - Lee Min Ho and Woo Do Hwan and parallel worlds and written by Kim Eun Suk. Yes Please.

I should probably make one for cdramas too though that one would be rather shorter.

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whitecatindisguise · 5 years ago

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He Will Pay

So, we’re finally there. It’s the final chapter of the story. You can treat it as a sort of epilogue. Thank you for bearing with me the whole time. And keep out, I might start posting something else soon (hopefully).

---------

Chapter 7

The double door to the throne room opened and people inside quietened. The prisoner was led down the aisle, towards the centre of the room. His hands and legs were in shackles, the chains rattling with every movement. He was flanked by two guards, each of them holding one of his shoulder.

The crowd whispered and murmured as he walked, their eyes showing anger, hate and a sense of justice. The prisoner didn’t look up but he was well aware of the stares. He smirked, not paying mind to the atmosphere in the room.

The group finally reached the centre of the room. Behind them, in the benches, sat the townspeople and nobles. In front of them, on three thrones, sat the royal family. The Captain of the Guard and the Royal Advisor both stood to their right and left respectively.

Nigel cleared his throat, before unrolling the scroll he held under his shoulder and stepping forward.

“Hubert of Saporia!” He started and the room felt silent.

“Andrew, if you don’t mind.” The prisoner interrupted. The Advisor glared at him but continued without losing a beat.

“Hubert of Saporia” He repeated, putting a stress on the name. “You stand today in front of the Royal Court, to answer for the crimes committed against the Kingdom of Corona and its citizens! Before I read out the charges, do you have anything to say?”

“Where’s the kid?” The male asked, looking around. “Figured he’d be here.”

Eugene took a few deep breaths to steady himself. He didn’t want to lash out on the man, it wouldn’t serve any good. From the corner of his eye he noticed Rapunzel tensing on her throne, her knuckles white from gripping the armrests. She, too, was fighting herself to just stand up and slap the male.

“The Royal Engineer already gave his testimony and his presence is no longer required.” Nigel replied with a steady voice.

“Shame. Wanted to see him again.” Andrew shrugged his shoulders and Eugene thought for a moment Rapunzel will blow up right there. Queen Ariana reached out her hand and gently put it on her daughter’s calming her down. The princess took a deep breath and smiled gratefully at her mother.

“If you have nothing else to say, I will proceed with stating the charges.” Nigel interrupted before the prisoner could say anything more. “Hubert of Saporia” He said, ignoring the male correcting his name again. “You are charged with threatening to overthrow the rulers of Corona, planning and staging coup d'état, planning to destroy the kingdom and its citizens, attacking and brainwashing the rulers of Corona, attacking the princess. Of most recent ones, you are charged with escaping the dungeons, kidnapping the Royal Engineer, holding against his will, threatening with death, torturing and causing multiple injuries.” The people started to whisper again, their voices agitated. “These are all the charges. How do you pledge?”

“Not guilty.” Andrew replied instantly, the ever-present smirk on his face. Townsfolk and nobles gathered in the room started shouting, calling him a liar and a threat to the kingdom.

Some people started throwing tomatoes and eggs at the male, their anger and hatred visible in their actions.

“Quiet!” Nigel’s voice echoed in the room, bouncing from the walls. People shut up at once, sitting back down. They were still angry, but no one was shouting or throwing anything anymore. “Hubert of Saporia, are you sure this is how you pledge?”

“You heard me, old man.” Came the reply and angry voices aroused again. Nigel shouted for them to quiet down, but it didn’t work the second time.

“Silence!” An authoritative voice boomed in the throne room, successfully shutting up the angered mob. King Frederic was standing up, his eyes glaring at the people before moving to the prisoner. “Hubert of Saporia, based on the testimony of witnesses and multiple proofs, including plans signed with your name, I thereby find you guilty of all the charges and sentence to the life-sentence in the Royal Mines.”

At hearing that, people started to argue again, but the King continued nevertheless.

“Tomorrow morning you will be placed on the Prison Barge and taken to the mines. Is that clear?” King Frederic looked down at the prisoner expectantly.

“Clear as a bell. Although it must have hurt your pride to not get rid of me on the spot, Your Highness.” The male smirked in response. “I always knew you didn’t have to guts.”

“Actually, your sentence was requested by the Royal Engineer, who you kidnapped, held against his will and tortured.” Nigel explained, a smirk on his face. “How does it feel to know, the one you wronged let you live?”

“He’s an idiot. That’s all to it.” Andrew hissed through clenched teeth. How dare they say it in front of everyone. He’d be a laughing stock if any other prisoner was to know he’d got away only because the kid he failed to kill decided against it.

“Or he wanted to show you he’s not like you.” A female voice said and he saw the princess standing up. “That whatever he’d done in the past, he never was and never will be like you.”

Andrew growled in response but didn’t say anything. How dare they?!

“Although the Royal Engineer didn’t want your death, let me add something, before we end.” The King said, his eyes stern. “If you in any way attempt or are found attempting to escape, you will receive a death sentence. Court dismissed.”

With that words the guards grabbed Andrew and led him away, back to the dungeons, where he was to await the morning.

~~~~~~

The sun was barely up but the port was already busy. A group moved towards one of the docks.

“Are you sure you want to do this?” Quirin looked down at his son, worry in his eyes. “You haven’t recovered yet.”

“I know, dad. But I have to... no, I need to do this” Varian shook his head as they made their way towards the Prison Barge. “I need to see him. To... make sure...”

“That he’s truly leaving?” Adira asked. The boy nodded slowly.

“It would be better if you’d just let me-” Hector started but Adira struck the back of his head.

“We’ve already discussed it, brother. If our nephew doesn’t wish for it, we won’t do it.” She stated in a voice you don’t argue with.

“I appreciate the gesture, uncle. But I am not like him.” Varian looked up at him from where he was sitting on a wheelchair.

The Royal Medic, seeing they boy was unwavering in his decision to see the barge off, ordered him to at least use the wheelchair, since he was in no condition to walk all the way himself.

“Gah, you are too soft. It’s your fault, Quirin!” Hector argued but smiled fondly, ruffling his nephew’s hair.

“Varian!” A female voice called out and they saw Rapunzel waving her hand at them. She waited until they came closer, her short brown hair moving with the soft breeze. “What are you doing here? I thought the Royal Medic said you’re not to leave the bed for at least one more week.”

“Try and hold him in one place for a week.” Quirin laughed. “And I’m not counting the lab.”

Rapunzel chuckled in response and looked at Varian. Her smile wavered and turned into a troubled frown.

“We were really worried about you. Everyone was doing their best.” She said and the boy looked down at the words. He felt bad with how people worried about him, even though this time it wasn’t entirely his fault. “I can’t even begin to think, what would happen if Eugene didn’t get to you when he did. I couldn’t lose you, Varian.”

“Thank you, Pri-Rapunzel.” The alchemist mumbled, his head staring at Ruddiger sleeping comfortably on his laps. Since he was brought back, the raccoon didn’t leave his side even for a moment. He petted his back absent-mindedly, the animal letting out a quiet purr.

Suddenly, a prison wagon appeared on the horizon, Max and Eugene leading it, two other guards, who Varian recognised as Pete and Stan, riding behind. They stopped near the group and Eugene gave a surprised frown at the alchemist.

“Get out!” Stan ordered, opening the door to the wagon and letting the prisoner step outside. He was still wearing shackles on his arms and legs, but the smirk didn’t disappear.

“Hey, I’m coming. Gee, talk about patience.” Andrew strolled slowly from inside the wagon and looked around. His eyes stopped on the group and he seemed to stare straight at Varian.

The boy cringed and shivered under the gaze, turning his head downward. Ruddiger woke up at the slight movement and noticed the Saporian, hissing in his direction from his master’s laps. Hector and Adira stepped in front of him protectively, while Quirin laid a comforting hand on his son’s shoulder.

“Heeeey, kid. How’s your shoulder?” The male called out, not paying attention to the guards telling him to shut up. “Still a little bit too bony?”

Varian trembled at the comment, the memory of the acid eating his skin still fresh. Eugene moved to push Andrew towards the barge, but someone was faster.

Hector reached the male in few large steps, his blade opening and reaching for the throat. The guards shouted in alarm, but Eugene motioned for them to stay down, wondering, what the man was doing.

“Not another word, scum. If it wasn’t for my nephew, you’d be already dead and your ashes flying somewhere with even the smallest breeze.” Hector hissed, his blade pushing against the male’s throat.

The green eyes were wide open. Although he tried to hide it, he was terrified. He still remembered how the dark-haired man and his beasts attacked him back in the hideout. He attempted to fake his emotions, but he knew the man wasn’t kidding.

“Now listen closely, scum.” Hector’s blade pushed even more, but not enough to create a cut. “You will turn around and quietly step onto that boat. Then, you will obediently get yourself locked in the cell and sit still until you reach the mines. You will stay there until you die, because if ever hear you escaped, I will hunt you down and kill you myself. Do you understand?”

Andrew nodded fiercely, not daring to test the man’s patience. He still managed to steal a glance at Varian’s form, now looking directly at the two men. A growl and a sharp slap was the only warning he got, before the man retreated his blade and grabbed his shirt, lifting him up from the ground in one swift motion.

“And you will not look at nor speak to my nephew! EVER!” Hector growled before letting go of the Saporian’s shirt and letting him fall to the ground.

The guards quickly pushed him up and turned towards the barge, leading him on the board. He didn’t dare to look back, afraid of the man’s wrath. He grit his teeth in annoyance, that someone dared to make him feel terrified.

Hector huffed and rejoined the group, hiding his blade back. He met their surprised and unhappy gazes and shrugged.

“Someone had to teach him the lesson.” He stated, not in the slightest feeling guilty.

“Although I don’t approve the method, I appreciate the gesture.” Quirin nodded with a small smile. “You scared him half to death.”

“He almost wet himself.” Hector grinned in response and they heard Varian chuckle at that.

“Probably the first time someone scared him like that.” The boy added between the chuckles.

“First time for everything. And he deserved it.” Adira nodded in approval. “I am glad you’re feeling better.”

“Not yet...” Varian mumbled and everyone’s faces saddened. It was true, traumas like that didn’t disappear that easily. “But I will be.” He added, a small smile appearing on his face.

“In time.” His father agreed as he grabbed the handles of the wheelchair and turned back towards the castle. “Now, it’s high time we get back. You’ve still didn’t recover and we only got one-hour leave for you.”

Varian groaned at the thought and slumped in the chair. Ruddiger chirruped, as if trying to cheer up the boy. Rapunzel smiled, as she and Eugene watched the group walk back to the castle. The man put his arm around her and she leaned into the embrace.

“He will be fine.” She said and he hummed in agreement.

“He’s a tough little brat. I tell you, he’d be up and running before we even know it.” The man added as he turned his head to look at the ship disappearing behind the horizon. “And thanks to that crazy feral uncle of his, we have one problem less to worry about.”

“Hey, his name is Hector!” Rapunzel nudged his side playfully and he laughed. Yes, everything’s going to be fine.

--------

Aaaaaand, that’s it, folks. We’ve reached the end of He Will Pay. I thank you all for sticking with me. Your comments and reacts really kept me going.

I also want to say, I’ve published the story on both fanfiction.net and Ao3. You can find it there, whenever you feel like coming back and not want to search the whole tumblr to find it xD.

#varian #tts #andrew #fluff #overprotective uncle Hector #he will pay #brotherhood fluff

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yenslilac · 5 years ago

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Femininity in Game of Thrones - Sansa, Margaery and Daenerys (feat. Arya)

In Game of Thrones Sansa, Margaery and Daenerys represent a different ideas of femininity, and they operate within these ideas, how the stereotypes of their roles influence their behaviour and storyline, and how they affect each other.

[A Note: I talk a lot about the ‘ideal’ woman, or stereotypical feminine/masculine traits a lot. These don’t reflect my view, instead I tried to write this with Westerosi values in mind. Many of these points you might disagree with, that’s because they are valued by a fictional medieval society.]

Sansa represents the idea of Traditional Femininity - the ‘ideal’ woman, who is generally passive, beautiful and sweet, with an affinity for domestic duties.

Sansa likes sewing and dancing, and plays the high harp, and dreams of gallant knights. Both Arya and Catelyn Stark recognise she is very much suited to the life of a noble lady.

“Sansa was a lady at three, always so courteous and eager to please. She loved nothing so well as tales of knightly valor.”

- Catelyn VII, A Clash of Kings

The qualities of Traditional Femininity are not always negative, but it cannot be ignored that it is this example that many women have been forced into or compared against in-world and in our own reality, and I’ll discuss this effect on Arya and Brienne later.

But Sansa is praised by many for her lady-like qualities, and because of this for a lot of her life she has lived in a privileged and sheltered life. This makes it difficult for her during her time in King’s Landing as she finds it difficult to understand and adapt to her life as a hostage, because she was taught to obey her lord, who was Joffrey.

Her passiveness shows within her storyline, as she never actively pursues a goal like Margaery or Daenerys. She is promised to Joffrey by her parents, her role in Joffrey’s death was unknown to her, and her escape from King’s Landing was in the hands of Dontos Hollard and Lord Baelish. She has two brief moments with Joffrey - one which she pleads for her father’s life, but this falls under ‘woman begs for a life to be saved’ and she relies on her sweet gentleness to sway Joffrey. The second is when she is brought to see the heads of her father and other members of the Stark household in King’s Landing.

“Maybe my brother will give me your head.”

- Sansa VI, A Game of Thrones

Sansa shows that her passive gentle nature could evolve into a way that uses to advance herself. A way to use her power and influence to sway decisions and gain power by leaning into these qualities that she possesses and that people expect of her. An example of this could be Lady Macbeth, or on a more positive note, Margaery, who is up next. We actually see this again in more deliberate way, in the Vale. After Lysa’s death Sansa cries and absolves Petyr Baelish and herself of any guilt or responsibility. However, in Season 8, this is tried several more times, but ends up making her look catty and bitchy, because they did not lean into her strengths. In the end she is made Queen with the permission of brother, and we see no election creating her as Queen. As was at the start of the story, she returns to a passive role and lets others lift her up to new positions of power.

Margaery represents what could be considered the Femme Fatale - she has control and ambition, particularly regarding her own body. She is willing to push the boundaries of acceptable society, but she is also aware of the expectations of women, and leans into them, just as Sansa began to do. She plays innocent and passive while also manipulating the likes of Joffrey and Tommen with her body language.

Margaery learnt from the likes of her grandmother the power thet women have without being physically aggressive. This is important for Margaery as a noble lady, because she has to conform to society's expectations in order to succeed. She plays innocent and passive, conforming to the ideals of society.

[If you’re really interested in how she manages to manipulate people I would really recommend watching this video from Charisma On Command, which explains how she is able to get Joffrey on her side as well as other characters.]

But Margaery is also willing to push against the restraints of this persona, baiting Cersei when she knows her own power will soon outstrip the others. She wears less modest clothing as opposed to the more reserved clothing of Cersei (highlighting her youth and beauty) and meets with the poor and orphans.

Like I mentioned before, Margaery uses her position and persuasion to influence decisions. She gets both Joffrey and Tommen alone and builds their trust of her, acting innocent and gentle for Joffery, making him feel dominant and powerful, and playful for Tommen, who, a younger boy was a little in awe of a beautiful woman. She submits to the High Sparrow, avoiding the Walk of Shame, and allowing her back into the Red Keep.

But this also leads to her downfall. Her constant pushing against Cersei and manipulation leads to Cersei correctly viewing her as an active threat. Cue the Sept of Baelor explosion. But does this mean that Margaery's ambition, manipulation and pushing against society's rules are a bad thing? Not at all. These actions allowed Margaery to pursue her goals on her own terms. It was Cersei's actions that put her in a position where she was stuck - and even then I have seen many criticisms of the whole Sept of Baelor, so this can maybe be put down to D&D wanting a quick way to kill her off.

Daenerys represents the Masculine Femininity - a combination of typical masculine and feminine traits. Daenerys dresses in typically feminine clothes - long dresses with intricate embroidery, and she has long braided hair. She does not make her more masculine, and falls into the bracket with Margaery and Sansa, as they are all very feminine characters. The difference between them and Daenerys, is that Dany has many more traits typically attributed to men - she is willing to take an aggressive approach herself, usually involving her dragons. She is also much more direct in her threats -

“We will lay waste to armies, and burn cities to the ground. Turn us away and we will burn you first.”

This is unlike the other two feminine women, Margaery and Sansa, who are not so aggressive, but this does not make this a bad thing. Daenerys benefits from her drive and ambition, and her direct attitude allows her to be taken more seriously when dealing with the slave masters in Essos.

Daenerys does not uphold a persona, and lays out her cards on the table. People see her genuinely, and her compassion and sense of justice gains her friends as well as enemies. This clash of stereotypical male and female traits e.g. compassion vs. strict justice, gentleness vs. aggressiveness, creates her character, and often draws criticism from other characters. Like Sansa was considered foolish, Margaery provocative, Daenerys is persuaded to be more gentle and forgiving, which she ignores. She is told be less gentle and compassionate, when wanting to free the slaves of Yunkai, but ignores that as well. Just like Sansa and Margaery ,who began to learn to take other’s expectations as an advantage, Daenerys embraces both sides of her nature, understanding when to be merciful and when to be stern - Like a mother!

Considering that characters like Jon Snow are never criticised on screen for executing Janos Slynt, or Tyrion Lannister using wildfire on Stannis’ army, the fact that Daenerys faces negativity whenever she suggests aggressive action, such as executing one of her advisors after he killed an imprisoned Son of the Harpy, or flying to the Red Keep to confront Cersei (in Season 7, she never actually says she will burn it down), it could be concluded that Daenerys as a woman, is being unfairly leashed, while her male counterparts dole out dubious acts of justice without someone in the back saying “maybe instead, you could be nice to them!”

Arya is probably one of the most central non-feminine characters in Game of Thrones. She rejects the traditional ideals of the gender - Arya rejects the expectations placed upon her as a woman, and the restraints that come with it.

Arya in the show is a cold blooded killer, especially in the later seasons. She calmly slices a man’s throat, and bakes his sons into a pie. Arya in the books however is compassionate, protective, and is much more inclined to typically feminine things than in the show. In the show, Arya does show love and kindness, but to a lesser degree than in the books (which I think is a damn shame).

Arya and Daenerys are characters who receive a lot of hatred and criticism. It could be called coincidence, but both the characters fall into categories OUTSIDE the ‘ideal woman’. Sansa and Margaery are compassionate and gentle and are (or believed to be) passive. Daenerys and Arya are also compassionate (depending on the media for Arya) and protective, but unlike Sansa and Margaery, they do not appear as passive to onlookers. They are direct and often aggressive in their approach to things, but also practice restraint and impulsivity in situations.

Arya is most definitely disliked for the fact that she, a woman, dresses and carries out actions unlike what she is supposed to do. Sansa fed Ramsey to the dogs, and rightfully so, because he raped and abused her. Arya kills Meryn Trant and Walder Frey in brutal ways, but I have seen a lot of hate towards her that is generally not directed at Sansa. Perhaps it could pinned to the fact that Sansa herself did not directly kill Ramsey, and walked away as he died. Arya killed them herself, and watched as they died.

Both women clearly took pleasure in the killing, so I think it would not be wrong that many people see Sansa’s action as triumphant, her smile a small crack in her ladylike demeanor, and then turn around and condemn Arya for doing the same, because she is less ladylike and more masculine. Sansa does not engage in the dirty work, Arya does. Sansa is a gentle lady exacting justice upon a cruel man, but looks away from the gore. Arya is a psychopath who gladly takes a hand in brutal murder.

These situations are essentially the same, yet Arya is shamed and insulted by the audience for it. It is similar to Daenerys. Every harsh action - the execution of Mirri Maz Duur, Doreah and Xaro Xhoan Daxos, the slave masters, the Tarlys. All of them are analyzed and judged and she is hated for it. She is physically powerful (I say this because of her dragons) and ambitious, and like Arya, often has a hand in the execution of her enemies.

Daenerys does not take pleasure in most of these scenarios, mainly because unlike Arya, the executions are usually not revenge motivated. Yet again, she is villified, almost for the opposite reason to Arya. She dresses feminine yet acts in ways often interpreted as masculine. Many might argue that this is not the sole reason for the hatred directed towards, and I agree, but I definitely think that it plays a strong part, especially as other male characters, and Sansa do not have essays painting them as villains and specifically using the executions they carry out.

I also want to address the claim that many Sansa stans have, which is the reason I felt prompted to make this in the first place. Many of Sansa’s fans feel that she is hated because she is feminine, unlike other characters, which I felt is wrong, and I think I’ve provided enough evidence for that. It cannot be denied that the specific type of femininity that Sansa exhibits has been used against women in her own universe and ours. If you are not modest, you’re a slut, women should be quiet and gentle, they should be homemakers. These ideas are old but they still are quite common in many aspects of society today, which is also why I made this post, because it seems that this could one of the reasons that Arya and Dany are disliked so much. I also wanted to show that Margaery, while different, definitely fits into Sansa’s femininity, and I see hardly any hate posts about her.

So, to conclude, Sansa, the Traditional Femininity earned her praise and allowed her to rise up the ranks, but also left her passive and naive, when she was younger, because of the shelter her privilege gave her (the privilege I refer to is the respect and admiration of her friends and older women in her life, something Arya did not have due to her lack of talent/interest in feminine duties). Margaery used Traditional Femininity as a cover which allowed her to orchestrate her own ambition and desires, while subtly manipulating those around her. Daenerys used strength to intimidate her enemies and generosity to gain her friends, but these qualities drew a lot of criticism to her character. Arya is similar - she faces criticism for not being ‘a real woman’ (which I have seen people say). None of these characters are at fault for how they are written and the consequences that result from their characterisation, but it is us, as an audience, to recognise these differences between characters especially in regard to how we view women, and how they influence our view of the characters.

#sansa stark #margaery tyrell #daenerys targaryen #arya stark

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velvet-tread · 5 years ago

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In which Star Wars was uplifting af for a hot second and we all hoped they wouldn’t fuck it up

TROS got a lot wrong (howls into the Rey nobody/Rose Tico void forever) but boy did they get one thing right and that was the rise of Ben Solo on Kef Bir.

And maybe I’m misinterpreting this Important Man Work with my delicate lady eyes, but for me it was about a bit more than the symbolism of Kylo Ren’s “death”, which has been much picked over already and confirmed by the production team. The tl;dr is that the whole sequence felt like it ran far deeper than a simple death-rebirth cycle, and there’s a certain rhythm to how this sequence goes down that is just pure poetry. So, I have to have do a breakdown.

Caveat: Some of my read on it may be way off what was actually intended because I fully believe this movie was written by a team of barely-sentient walruses with fanboy party hats on and we should probably lower our expectations with regards to emotional intelligence but here goes anyway.

The location is a ruined Death Star in the middle of a churning sea. A RUINED DEATH STAR. IN A CHURNING SEA.

What better metaphor is there for Kylo Ren? All of the conflict, all of the rage and all of his chaotic energy in the Force which led him down this path, embodied in roiling water. Everything he aspired to, the power and glory of Darth Vader, rotting and fragile and corrupted by the very same turmoil that corrupted Ben Solo.

Safety info: walruses shouldn’t be allowed trowels at all, let alone permitted to use them to lay it on so damn heavy.

So in the middle of this mad-dramatique metaphor Kylo Ren is chasing Rey. She lures him to the very, very edge of this Death Star, this old, crumbling dream of his, to fight him to the death. SWEET LORD THEY ARE SO STRONG AND EVENLY MATCHED IN THE FORCE AND MY KINK LIVES.

And then: Leia calls.

His mother, her mother, the mother of every Star Wars fan that ever lived. She calls. And Kylo Ren brbs out of battle headspace, Leia dies with the effort of it and Rey spears him with his own lightsabre just as they both feel Leia’s light putter out.

Silence.

This is where I get very emo even for me. I can’t remember if the score was cut – it probably wasn’t – but it may as well have been because I just heard white noise. WHAT. A. MOMENT.

Obviously this changes everything but not in the way I – or these two characters – had been prepared for. Because what really sticks is that Kylo getting skewered isn’t the Important Development here. It’s utterly incidental. The most important development in this whole edge of the world scenario is that Leia is dead.

(Sidebar: I know that Chris Terrio has said that some of what followed was intended as Leia mindfuckery, but seeing as a) I hate that, and b) they chose to insert her “death” at the point where she reached out to Ben, I’m ignoring that extra-textual info hashtag walrus).

We get a couple of shocked seconds as Kylo Ren and Rey process. Kylo doesn’t even seem to notice that he has a gaping hole in his torso. Rey looks numb. Neither of them seem aware that the other is present. But then she looks at him and oh- not only is he physically broken, visibly made of the same flesh and bone that she is, but that horror she feels is reflected right back at her.

It’s a moment of parallel, silent grief and shared, binding humanity, and that is what I think leads her to heal him. Suddenly, she can no longer see a monster. She sees only a human being, pitiful, lost and wrecked, someone who meant something to Leia and she to him, and because’s she’s Rey, her compassion and empathy and all her inherent kindness kick in.

And look, this is where I diverge from some of the more critical views on Bendemption and its real-world meaning. Because I don’t think this particular redemption story is really about the rendemptee. This isn’t a story that centres male pain (although there is plenty of it in the ancilliary material and I Do Not Forget Ben Solo’s pain) and it isn’t a story that makes the case for redemption on a man’s inherent “goodness”. In fact Kylo/Ben, his character and rap sheet, don’t really matter in this moment.

What matters is Rey, and the choices she makes when she’s looking into the darkness herself. Her mentor is dead. She’s just won a battle and has sentenced her enemy to death. It would be very easy for her to grab that little slice of darkness she’s been so tempted by this whole time. Salve the wound of her grief with the feeling of power over another. Satiate her loneliness with anger. But she doesn’t. She chooses kindness. She chooses love.

And like, I don’t mean romantic love, shipper though I be. I mean the love that Rey has within her, separate from her idea of justice and completely unrelated to forgiveness or “deserving”.

This love that Rey has for Leia, for the Resistance, for Han, for her vanquished drama queen enemy Kylo Ren, for hot mess Ben Solo, for everyone, is so fucking powerful and redemptive in its own right it needs an executive assistant and its own en suite bathroom. It’s on her face as she weeps uncontrollably as she heals him (and damn, Daisy Ridley absolutely smashed this whole scene), and it’s reflected in his face which is – thank you Adam Driver for this – utterly incredulous that she would give him another chance at life when he knows damn well he isn’t owed one.

That is when she deals the sucker punch. She doesn’t offer him forgiveness. She tells him what he could have had if he hadn’t made his choices. “Ben’s hand” is the hand of someone who chooses the light, commits to it and sacrifices for it. Which means: power and glory isn’t worth her soul, and it shouldn’t be worth his either. That his inner conflict means nothing on its own. That the mere existence of goodness within him would never have been enough for her. Then she leaves.

*screams into a pillow for all eternity*

According to George Lucas, Star Wars has always been about love. And it’s shrouded in this cloak of unconditional human love – and I am not a fan of unconditional love in a relationship context but HOLY FUCK this is the love that counts here – that Ben Solo finds the strength to compartmentalise Kylo Ren and confront the worst thing he’s ever done: the death of his father. And the forgiveness Memory!Han implicitly offers (and it ABSOLUTELY tracks that Han Solo, who canonically cherished his son even after he was murdered by him, would offer him forgiveness, fight me) is what gives him the strength to turn away from the Dark Side, let his anger go and let the churning sea claim his cracked, volatile crossguard.

Leia’s sacrifice, Rey’s compassion and Han’s forgiveness, all powered by love, rebuilt a whole-ass PERSON and that shit is hopeful af. I thought – wow this is GENUINELY UPLIFTING AND MOVING, I hope they don’t fuck it up.

*looks at the camera like I’m in the Office*

Anyway, Ben Solo lives. Peace out.

#ben solo #rey #kylo ren #reylo #star wars #tros #tros spoilers #star wars meta #rach writes #this feels good it's been a long time #tros meta

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fortune-fool02 · 5 years ago

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Love Thy Enemy

Kakyoin Noriaki x enemy female reader

Warnings: angst, bit of blood, fluff

This was just an idea that popped into my head. Please enjoy.

It was not her intention to lie to them. It was not her intention to watch them walk blindly into this little mission, battling fellow followers of Lord Dio. But it was not [Name]’s fault that they weren’t smart enough to notice the tiny little details that could save their skin.

As one of Lord Dio’s best servants, [Name] was given the mission of, not to kill the group of crusaders, but to learn everything she could about them; ranging from family and friends to their darkest secrets that they tried so hard to bury deep within themselves and pretend it did not exist.

That was [Name]’s job. Gather what information she could about them and send word to Lord Dio of their progress and -if possible without causing suspicion- lead them astray. There was something about [Name] that gave that sense of security, all she had to do was bat her eyelashes with that sweet little smile and people found it difficult to not trust her. The picture of innocent and sweet, concealing the serpent that laid in wait for the perfect opportunity to strike.

That was the irony of her own Stand, The Fool. Though, they were oblivious to the fact she had a Stand in the first place.

However, somewhere in this little adventure, something changed. [Name] would be sitting by the campfire, thinking about their next steps when Kakyoin would approach her, asking if he could sit beside her. She shrugged and he sat beside her. It didn’t take long before the two would be lost in small talk, discussing different topics and finding common interests such as an author they both read and drawing.

This didn’t faze [Name]. It was just harmless conversation between a fool and a lair, nothing more and nothing less. Though, if she was honest with herself, she did find Kakyoin’s company more interesting than the others.

***

Things began to spiral from her grasp as time ticked onwards. Despite what she did, she found herself growing to enjoy Kakyoin’s -as well as the other’s- company. The playful, childish banter they would all share, the carefree attitudes they had.

It brought back moments of her life that she had long tried to forget. Especially when she learned of their families. Mr Joestar’s daughter -Jotaro’s mother- was battling for her life because of Dio. Normally, this would have no affect on [Name] but when she saw the traces of concern that would flicker across Jotaro’s eyes whenever someone mentioned it, and how Mr Joestar would physically slump, it made something twist inside of her.

One night, whilst the others were sleeping, [Name] climbed from her sleeping bag and wandered off somewhere to think. How... How could she actually do any of this? The reason why she agreed to join Lord Dio was because she wanted to hunt down the man who put her mother into a coma -and who was still fighting for her life- and now, here she was, watching another family suffer the same fate. Except this time, [Name] was the bastard’s helper.

Could she really force another to suffer the same thing she was? But, if she didn’t then Dio would force one of his flesh buds into her head and then she would never see her mother again. She was stuck between a rock and a hard place, dammit.

***

When the group had reached Enyaba’s hotel, the [Hair colour] female sent the old woman a cold glare. The old woman only smiled sweetly at her though she could almost sense the coldness behind it. Enyaba was fully aware of [Name]’s role in all this.

“So, what have you learnt about our little brats?” Enyaba asked when she and [Name] were alone. The [Hair colour] female turned her gaze to the unlit fireplace, “I’ve learnt more than enough.” she answered, refusing to look at the old hag.

“Wonderful. I’m sure Lord Dio will be pleased with you.” It was pathetic. [Name] knew that she was not a good person for siding with Dio but she didn’t think she could bare knowing that others were suffering more than deserved. What wrong had the Joestars done to Dio to deserve their entire bloodline to be crushed?

With a shake of her head, [Name] turned on her heel and walked out the room. Not moments later down the hall, she stopped. Kakyoin. She could hear Kakyoin’s voice from the room she was in moments ago. Crap.

***

“Excuse me, miss.” Kakyoin spoke as he pushed the door open, looking around the room. Enyaba looked over at him, the sweet facade falling back on as she smiled at him.

“Yes young man, what’s the matter?” Kakyoin looked around, his brow lightly furrowed.

“I’m looking for my friend, [Name]. I could have sworn I heard her in here.” he said, Enyaba waved her bandaged hand a little.

“Oh, that sweet girl? She just left.” she replied, “Why? Is something wrong?” He shook his head a little. Ever since they arrived here, he hasn’t been able to talk to [Name] as she was always off somewhere. It was strange but he wanted to ensure she was alright. The last thing he would want is for her to be hurt.

“No, I just want to know if she’s alright. She hasn’t been quite herself since we got here and I’m just worried.” There was a sprinkle of concern in his words that Enyaba noticed easily, as well as the slight furrow in his brow. The boy was worried about [Name]. An idea clicked in the old woman’s head,

“You sound as if you care about her.” Kakyoin looked at her, his emerald eyes clouded with surprise at that. He sighed softly, a sigh of defeat. Oh, how cute. The boy cared about [Name] and he had no idea of her true intentions. “You know, I think she went that way.” Enyaba said, pointing towards the door [Name] walked out moments ago. The second Kakyoin turned his back, her scissors emerged from her sleeve.

As she rose her scissors high, ready to drive them through Kakyoin’s flesh, the doors flew open; a force shoving Kakyoin out of the way of the scissors and sending Enyaba back. [Name] stood there, her body shielding Kakyoin as she glared at Enyaba.

“What the hell is wrong with you, [Name]?” the old hag shouted, her eyes wild with anger as she pointed her scissors at the [Hair colour] female. She looked between [Name] and Kakyoin, everything clicking into place. “You’ve gone soft, haven’t you? You had one job to do and you couldn’t even do that. Lord Dio will be very disappointed in you!”

With a yell, [Name]’s Stand materialised from the shadows beside Enyaba, taking the old woman off guard at the monstrous figure suddenly charging at her, giving her little time to react as the Stand threw her through the doors. [Name] didn’t stay to check Kakyoin, instead, she went after Enyaba. With a Stand like Justice, she had to be quick.

As [Name]’s Fool charged, a handful of Enyaba’s puppet corpses lunged at her. The Fool turned, abandoning its attack on the hag and moved to the corpses, giving Enyaba the chance to strike.

“[Name] watch out!” Kakyoin called to the [Hair colour] female. [Name] turned sharply, grabbing Enyaba’s hand and landing a sharp kick in her ribs before ripping the scissors from her hand and throwing them somewhere. As Justice formed behind her, Enyaba’s face strained, the colour fading from her skin as she heaved as if struggling to breath.

[Name] looked over to see Star Platinum inhaling Justice, clearing the air of the twisted fog and rendering Enyaba defenceless. Once the old hag collapsed, [Name] turned to Jotaro and was greeted with a punch from his Stand, sending her flying into the staircase. Blood trickled from her head as her vision swam slightly from the impact.

“This entire time, you were an enemy, [Name].” she heard Kakyoin say as his figure approached her along with Jotaro’s. She knew this would happen eventually. “Guess that makes us the fools.” [Name] shifted to get, at least, a little more comfortable, causing Jotaro to take a step forward, expecting an attack that didn’t come.

“I didn’t do it because I wanted to, Kakyoin.” she said, earning a scoff from Jotaro but she ignored it and continued. “You know what Dio is like, you yourself have been in his command.” the red haired male shot her a look that made her cringe on the inside.

“Because he had a flesh bud in my head.” [Name] nodded,

“Exactly. I did all this because I didn’t want to have that in my head.” she confessed, seeing no point in hiding anything any longer. If she was lucky, Jotaro would kill her before Dio could. She would rather die by his hands rather than Dio’s. “I wanted to go back to my mother, and he told me that if I followed his orders then I could see her again. If I didn’t, he would kill her and force a flesh bud into my head.” she lowered her head.

Kakyoin crouched down beside her, his eyes spinning with sorrow, “But why did you attack Enyaba? If she was working for Dio.” [Name] rose her gaze to meet his.

“Because I didn’t want to see you hurt, Kakyoin.” she admitted, suddenly feeling small and pathetic like a child. “I care about you and I didn’t want to see you get hurt because of this.” Whatever confessions she admitted to now would be pointless, they would only see it as a pathetic attempt to slip past judgement.

Confusion flooded her body when she felt Kakyoin’s arms wrap around her body, holding her close. “W-What’re you doing?” she asked. Kakyoin only held her closer before speaking.

“I believe you.” her [Eye colour] eyes widened, shock flooding them. How... How could he believe her after finding out she has done nothing but lie and deceive them? “[Name], I can look into someone’s eyes and know if they’re lying to me.” he said, leaning back slightly to look at her.

“When I look in your eyes, I can see the hurt and pain you have been through. I knew you weren’t all that you claimed to be and that was why we brought you along in the first place.” How ironic. The fool was fooled; who’s the idiot now then?

Despite what she did, Kakyoin didn’t hate her. If anything, he sympathised her. Tears pricked her eyes before she could stop them and Kakyoin pulled her into an embrace again.

“Don’t worry [Name]. We will save Jotaro’s mother as well as yours. I promise you.”

#kakyoin #kakyoin noriaki #jojo bizarre adventure #kakyoin x reader #kakyoin noriaki x reader #jojo bizzare adventure x reader #jojo #jojo x reader #stardust crusaders #stardust crusaders x reader #kakyoin stardust crusaders #fluff #female reader #reader insert

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simonsaidthat · 5 years ago

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“It Gets Better Later...” JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure Part 2 (also... Part 2)

Splitting up my written thoughts on JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure into Parts, I’ve finished reading the manga and I’m listing each part from “least looking forward to sitting through the Anime version of to most excited for”. Which doubles as a “Worst to Best” list.

I’ve already listed Part 1: Phantom Blood as the worst entry (it’s not... that bad?) but we’re moving up to the next part that’s not AS bad as Part 1.

Part 2: Battle Tendency

(I have seen the opening, and the opening rocks).

As stated previously, I think the worst Part of Phantom Blood is Will A. Zeppeli, Hamon/Ripple, and basically the entire second half of Part 1. The strongest element of Phantom Blood was Dio trying steal the Joestar inheritance in the first half. The second half is about Johnathan learning random magic bullshit that wasn’t in the first half to find and defeat Dio who was now off-screen.

Part 2 is at least all in on the magic bullshit, so it can instead focus on applying it to its ridiculously escalating series of battles.

And I didn’t really go into greater detail about this, but Johnathan Joestar wasn’t particularly interesting either. He was just kind of a boring ‘good boy’ and any extended screen time made sitting through Part 1 harder and harder.

Joseph Joestar on the other hand was anything but boring. The strongest elements of Battle Tendency were the heroes Joseph, Caeser Zeppeli, and Lisa Lisa. Their dynamic is so good, that I’m frankly disappointed in every other JoJo Part that doesn’t have as strong a group pairing as these three.

After reading 8 different JoJo’s, Joseph might be my favorite Joestar protagonist.

...but Part 2 is still my second least favorite JoJo part.

Look, I’m reading JoJo because everyone keeps recommending the series (and the series they’re most fond of appear to be post Hamon/Ripple stuff), so Part 2 can’t help but be a roadblock in that way, but I attest that it’s not the lack of Stands that makes Part 2 a hard sit through. After all, the inclusion of Hamon/Ripple is what ruined Part 1 for me, and simply removing it would have made Phantom Blood easily in my top 3.

It’s not the Hamon/Ripple that makes Battle Tendency worse, nor is it the lack of Stands. Instead I’d say it’s because in execution, Part 2 is the total opposite of Part 1.

Part 1 had a great antagonist but a boring protagonist; Part 2 has amazing heroes, and boring villains (and one, sympathetic, cybernetic nazi to sour things further).

And I don’t like the Pillar Men.

Hirohiko Araki’s artwork is still a little rough during the early JoJo’s, that I wasn’t sure how large the Pillar Men were. I thought that maybe they were literal giants (which would have been interesting) but it may have just been a perspective thing...

Anyway, the first thing they do is walk through people and cause them to melt through contact. They seemed kind of boringly invincible beings which, to be fair, does lead to the one thing I like about the Pillar Men, is how susceptible they are to Joseph’s bluffs. This helps to elevate how unpredictable Joseph is (hence being my favorite Joestar) but it really hurts my impression of the Pillar Men in the process.

Other JoJo villains share a certain amount of “hubris” as a defining weakness for them, but the Pillar Men in particular come off as being incredibly short-sighted/dumb. They easily have the capacity to kill the heroes by contact and choose instead to give them a months time to “get stronger”.

Seriously? These are the LAST of the Hamon/Ripple Fighters, trained in the art of your only weakness (aside from sunlight which is only a mild inconvenience to them), and your willing to let them go because an idiot blow-hard “lesser being” claims that he can get stronger than you IF YOU LET HIM!!!

...this is probably why other JoJo villains either actively run away from the heroes or only get involved when there’s absolutely no other option and it’s the final battle.

I don’t know, maybe the anime adaption of Part 2 does the Pillar Men more justice (or maybe it’s been long enough for me to get a new perspective on them) but it’s agonizing knowing in advance that these “Super Vampires” are just one arc/part/block in the way of having Stand villains.

Granted, not all Stand Villains are created equal, and even though I’d be more excited to see the Anime Adaption of the next entry on the list... even the Pillar Men might be better than “that guy”.

Part Six: Stone Ocean

(Here comes the first curve ball)

Let me say this about reading through Hirohiko Araki’s writing: every JoJo parts individual arcs, encounters, “battles”, however you’d describe magic people showing off their weirdo powers to defeat the heroes and the strange stipulations on overcoming those said weird powers;

Everything escalates to higher, grander, tenser encounters, that every Part becomes more lethal than the previous entry. Sure you can probably point to one particular Stand from parts 3-5 and say “nothing beats this”, and I would counter with “Rainbow Snails” and those in the know will hopefully know what I’m talking about.

(That or every subsequent JoJo part finds new ways to trigger some new phobia I didn’t know I had.)

Basically if you think that I would suggest that Stone Ocean, which currently does not have an anime, starring the first female JoJo, is somehow not worth making an anime adaption of, than you’d be wrong. I’d love to find out what the soundtrack of Stone Ocean is gonna sound like for one thing, and Stone Ocean has my absolute favorite supporting character!

...but this one was a disappointment.

There was a point while reading JoJo where I had basically given up on remembering any character names (probably started with Part 3), and instead focused on the general flow of the story beats; “what’s the objective right now, who’s in the way, and who has which stand in the party.” This does occasionally mean I glaze over the details of the Stand fights (which are the highlights), and by the end of reading each Part, I can only really remember what happened in the Story.

And the Story of Part 6 is not as good as its own Stand Battles. (Minor Spoilers from here on out!)

I remember being psyched for Part 6. Female JoJo (who was also Jotaro’s kid), Shawshank Redemption/Green Mile/Prison setting, Dio’s possible return, and some kind of “Universe Ending Climax” that I heard might put all other JoJo endings to shame. But, as it turns out, some of those very elements that I was initially excited for were either absent or turned out to be a detriment to Jolyne Kujo’s story.

(Turns out setting your location in a boxed prison in Florida Marshland is only fun at first. Which is probably why the set is abandoned for the last third of Stone Ocean.)

While reading Part 4, I remember thinking with Jotaro’s inclusion that “I hope Jotaro doesn’t steal the spotlight away from Josuke”. By the time I reached Part 6, I realized that it wasn’t strictly Jotaro that was a problem, but rather the reverence for Part 3′s Jotaro Kujo and DIO.

The STORY of Part 6 seems to be a love letter to Part 3, which actively ruins Part 6.

What was the point of introducing DIO’s additional offspring? As far as I can tell they add nothing to the main villains schemes, nor do they seem to behave in any meaningful way like DIO. Giving them the Joestar Birthmark is only there to convey to the audience that they’re a big deal, and they’re barely in it. And they’re only revealed/show up during the last quarter of the story!

They’re the “Knights of Ren” of the Joestar Universe. Their name/origin makes them sound like a big deal, and they’re not.

If I had to guess, I would suggest that the only reason we’re introduced to “DIO’s kids” is because we needed a group of bad guys with Stands to fight the heroes, but we did not want to explain/worry over how this group of bad guys got Stands in the first place.

The worry over minutia of canon was a poison slowly killing JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure; starting with Part 4′s “we need another JoJo, let’s say Joseph cheated on his wife to have an illegitimate son so we don’t skip forward too far into the future”, and “how did the cast of Part 3 get Stands? Let’s say a Magic Arrow did it, now there’s a Magic Arrow that gives people Stands in Part 4”, the virus of continuity returns in Part 5 and finally takes roost in Part 6.

All because we might’ve taken Part 3 a little too seriously.

Again, DIO’s kids are barely a plot device of Part 6, but I think it’s perfectly emblematic of the problems with Part 6.

Strangely when it came to characters that I liked/disliked, I was able to divide my feelings by gender lines: I really like the Female main cast of characters and I didn’t care about any of the Male main cast of characters. The closest Male character that I liked was “Weather Report” when he was just a stoic support guy, but then he gets his memory back, briefly gets a worse personality, and is thrown aside shortly after.

And then you’ve got the main villain, Enrico Pucci.

One of the joys of reading through each Part was figuring out limitations of each stand user, and the eventual identity/stand of the final boss that must somehow be a greater threat than everything else that came before. If we know the identity of the Villain (Part 3) there’s a dramatic build up to the reveal of their Stand. If we know about their Stand first (Part 5) then we can slowly unravel the identity/appearance of the Villain.

Or you can do what Stone Ocean does and give us both close to the start of the series.

And visually speaking, hinging the plot of Stone Ocean on collecting Memory CD-Rom’s and sending them to the right people is just not exciting. And using this power to steal Jotaro’s Stand Power (this is early enough in the series to be an inciting incident and only a minor spoiler) and NOT USE IT or give it to a henchmen is a wasted opportunity!

I honestly think we missed out on an opportunity to switch Stands among the Party, but I guess that sequence would’ve been too similar to one that played out in another Part.

I hope an anime adaption “changes the CD-ROMS” to be more alien-like. They can still be round-disks/CD-like/vinyl disks, but, I don’t know, have screaming faces of the damned fade in and out of the reflections (faces do occasionally show up, but their usually static portraits to convey to the audience whom the CD belongs to). Make them more horrific/alien to look at.

Voice acting and music may help change things; for a North American Dub I hope Pucci gets the same voice actor as Netflix Castlevania’s Isaac, Adetokumboh M'Cormack. It’s... a very similar role, which would be fun, but I think his voice would provide a lot more charisma for Pucci.

youtube

(Apparently Pucci in Part 6 isn’t black, he’s just ambigiously brown and born into a pale white family. I had forgotten about his family, but I’d still like the Castlevania Actor to play him for the previously stated charisma and the casting gag of a loyal servant mourning the loss of his vampire lord).

The soundtrack to this arc has got to be tight if it hopes to elevate itself from the impression I got through reading it.

Also maybe have a filler arc for more Foo Fighters (F.F.) content. (She’s likely the “Tsuyu Asui” of the JoJo Universe, and if she’s not now, she will be once she’s in an anime).

#jojo's bizarre adventure #battle tendency #stone ocean #Joseph Joestar #Jolyne Kujo #enrico pucci

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megashadowdragon · 5 years ago

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I’m not a big fan of character hate period, and it’s idiotic that it occurs because of romance-related reasons (The ‘Die/Demonized for Our Ship’ trope is only one of them). Even in Twilight, I can give you a whole host of reasons why Bella is a bad character that have absolutely nothing (or very little) to do with her relationship with Edward and/or Jacob (or if they do, it’s related to how she treats other people while she is in a relationship with said guys). Ships and romance are not legitimate reasons to hate a character. If that romance is an ABUSIVE one, then obviously you can dislike/hate the abusive party. That’s not in question. But if you hate a character simply because they made some stupid relationship choices and/or 'get in the way’ of your ship, that’s stupid, and I don’t agree with it.

A better example is what happened in Young Justice with Miss Martian/Superboy and L'gann. L'gann is outright demonized by the fandom because he dared to date M'gann after she and Superboy broke up and he has a corny catchphrase. It also happens in the Teen Titans with Beast Boy and the Robin/Raven shippers (though to be fair, Starfire gets a LOT of hate over that ship as well). Also in regards to Snape, probably a better example is the demonization of James Potter from the Snape/Lily shippers (which is a whole other basket of apples considering Snape’s canon characterization).

And sorry, I wasn’t clear on the Hans/Anna/Kristoff thing. I meant that Hans gets VERY DESERVED flak for being…well, Hans, but also that Kristoff for whatever reason gets completely demonized by the Hans/Anna shippers. And then they BOTH get demonized by the Elsa/Anna shippers. Yeah. The main reason I think that was unreasonable is that there are plenty of reasons to hate Hans outside of the 'he gets in the way of Kristoff/Anna!’ Like the reason he’s a homicidal psychopath that wants to kill both sisters and get the crown and manipulates Anna into thinking she loves him. That’s a much better reason to dislike him than simply, 'I don’t like him because it means Anna can’t be with Kristoff!’ You see my point yet? Hating and demonizing a character because they 'get in the way’ of your preferred ship or made some idiotic relationship choices is dumb. People and characters are more than their romantic relationships.

I’d like you to take a look at the ’Die for our Ship’ and the ’Ron the Death Eater’ tropes and then get back to me. It’s what happened to Mako in-fandom. It’s not that uncommon, and happens just as often with male characters as it does with female characters.

On the rest of your post:

And Mako’s dismissal of Asami’s feelings was treated as wrong by the narrative. Asami called him out on it and said something to the effect of, 'you are in the wrong here and this is not okay, and blaming Bolin for telling me something you didn’t isn’t okay either.’ And Mako recognizes that his actions were wrong and that he went about the entire triangle issue the wrong way. Reiterating again, it was a jerk move, but Mako recognized that his actions were wrong and has been trying to atone for them. See: the tail end of Book 2 and literally the entirety of Book 3. It’s not like Mako was just given a free pass.

Do I deny that the love triangle could have been handled better? Of course not! Of course it could have been handled better. But whether it was due to mediocre writing or an 'art imitates life’ situation (because teenage romance is often a very messy and complicated thing IRL), the fact remains that hating and demonizing Mako because of his mishandling of the love triangle is like hating and demonizing Asami because she 'gets in the way’ of Makorra. Neither are okay. All of the characters have flaws and deal with situations less than perfectly because surprise surprise…they’re not perfect people. They make mistakes. Sometimes huge mistakes. And they ALL try to correct and atone for those mistakes. It’s something called character development. They’re all interesting and complex characters. Including Mako. You don’t seem to acknowledge that Mako has had quite a bit of character development since S1.

He needs to take responsibility for kissing Korra in front of Bolin? Korra kissed HIM! While on a date with Bolin! Please explain how Korra kissing Mako is somehow Mako’s fault. He may have reciprocated initially, but he was not the instigator. Korra does not get a free pass in this discussion. She is just as guilty as Mako for mishandling their relationship and the love triangle, both in Book 1 and in Book 2. Book 3 has been a refreshing change because it’s let them both have some character development independent of each other.

To be completely fair, from Mako’s perspective, what other reason could Korra have to accuse Hiroshi Sato of being an Equalist? Korra had shown jealousy and aggression towards Asami before that point and had actively attempted to mess up their relationship. Tenzin and Lin’s investigation brought up absolutely nothing that would indicate that Hiroshi was guilty. Korra’s only proof was an overheard conversation. And Mako DID take responsibility for it He sought Korra out afterwards and apologized for thinking that her reasons for accusing Hiroshi were related to his relationship with Asami. How long ago was it that you watched Book 1?

Book 1 and Book 2 had a six-month gap in between them. It’s implied that Mako and Asami worked out all of their issues (concerning the events of Book 1) in that time, as they are shown to be working together and being quite friendly in the first half of Book 2 (when he and Korra are still together). Korra and Asami had also worked out whatever lingering issues they had as they had become good friends (which was only furthered in Book 3). And they even explicitly talk about the Mako/Korra kiss while Mako and Asami were still dating. Where were you during that whole car conversation? The second half of Book 2 placed the blame solely on the shoulders of Mako within the narrative. Mako talks to Korra about his and Asami’s kiss right before they break up. He owns up to the mistakes he made, and Korra owns up to the mistakes she made. And then they break up.

And you’re being ridiculous about Mako’s other attributes. I’ve already discussed the Mako/Korra kiss. Him dating Asami has nothing to do with his ability to lead the Fire Ferrets. His relationship with Korra has nothing to do with his ability to raise and take of Bolin in the difficult circumstances they grew up in. His job as a cop has nothing to do with Korra until Korra’s actions intruded on his duty as a police officer. Some of Mako’s attributes that may be shown in relation to his romantic feelings for Korra and/or Asami, but have functionally nothing to do with either one. He’s incredibly protective of those he loves. This shown towards Korra and Asami, but also towards Bolin, Lin, and anyone else he happens to like. He loves Bolin to death and is very protective of him. His aloofness towards Bolin in Book 2 directly led to him trying to be closer and more attentive to him in Book 3. He’s a bit of a control freak and is pretty level-headed. He’s Korra’s foil narratively, which means that he attempts to ignore and avoid his problems instead of facing them head-on like Korra tends to do. Mako literally ACKNOWLEDGES that he is a hypocrite during the 'Harmonic Convergence’ episode when he and Bolin talk about how he is unable to take his own relationship advice.

What’s terribly ironic is that Bryke has stated a couple of times that Mako was intended to be 'a lighter, softer Zuko’ (while Korra was meant to be Aang’s antithesis). And we all know how much everyone loves Zuko.

Mako’s other attributes tying into his relationship issues don’t negate the fact that he has other attributes, nor do they negate that he had stories and character development separate from his romantic relationships with Korra and Asami. His role as the leader of the Fire Ferrets in Book 1, his life as a cop and trying to figure out what Varrick was up to in Book 2, his family subplot in Book 3…Mako had a life outside of his romantic relationships. Trying to pretend otherwise is blatantly ignoring the narrative.

#lok #mako #legend of korra #makorra

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exodusmc · 5 years ago

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A dream 04

Genre: Royal au

Words: 1853

Paring: Poor Jongdae! x princess reader!

Warning!: -

a/n: It’s a little more angsty but not real angst. :)

Pt 1 Pt 2 Pt 3 Pt 4 Pt 5

You stared at the girl which reflected in the mirror. She had a smile which would have made you cry if anyone else was in her place...but it was you who you were looking at, draped in a blue floral gown and hair in a updo to show of the massive jewelry dangling from your ears, shimmering on your neck. It was time to meet Park, someone you didn't even know the first name of. Your mother smiled sadly at you at the doorway, she too decorate in lavishness.

“I’m sorry darling…”she whispered out, the gloom which had lingered around her since she told you her secret had made her look older, broker. Your father would force her to meet her love again but in a setting which was only meant to bring agony.

“It’s okay...Mother everything is fine”Yoonji stood by your mother, her armor no longer acting as it. She too wore something blue and an expression of dullness.

“You’re a strong good girl, you’re my strong good girl.”your mother kissed your head, her fingers tracing slowly over your bare shoulder.”You’ll get through this on top”

Jongdae pushed his glasses higher on his face, nerves making him see suspicious people everywhere. He walked with Minseok, there clothing fancy but not royal. The night hung over his head, a mist crawling in over the city. It was raw and unwelcoming like the feeling of a storm, a feeling Jongdae had felt since the first time he laid eyes on Minseok's second letter.

“I’m sure everything will go smoothly..Don't worry”the older smiled but Jongdae didn't trust it, everything was wrong and his own greed made him go along with it. He wanted to see her again and this was his only chance but to which prize?

“Good evening”Baekhyun moved nervously on Jongdae's side, Minseok giving their invention to the guard while he had that authority smile on his lips.

Sierra wore a yellow gown, her skin shining against the fabric but under it all were knives and pants for an easier escape. The group made their way through the gold clad corridors, surrounded by people of class. Jongdae didn't fit in even with his suit, the way he moved wasn't graceful enough, not like Sierra or Minseok.

“You all know the plan right?” Minseok smiled politely while he spoke in a hush tone, his sharp eyes piercing through the two boys. Baekhyun nodded but he felt like throwing up, if something went wrong, it would probably be his fault but Jongdae smiled at him. Warmth spread through Baekhyun, calming him slightly, but guilt came with it.

“Yes..”

“Let’s go then..”

You had dreaded this moment for a long time, standing behind the arched doors which led to the grand hall, where everyone would be. You could already feel every gaze, every mumble of words. The king was speaking on the other side, his voice smug and superior. It was like you were a possession to him not his daughter.

“And I give you the next heir to the throne, Princess Y/n!” applause erupted through the mass as the doors opened for you to walk through. You smiled at them, not seeing faces but blank spaces were eyes should be. The all glimmered in glitz, they all seemed so far away.

You descended down the stairs, hand in your fathers, who grinned wide. You knew what would come after this, a dance with the king and then a dance with Park. Music tuned up through the large room, its mellow song aching in your heart. Your father didn't really look at you, he seemed to send glances to the side more than a few times. Violins made you float around the room until the rugged hand of the king changed for a smooth strong one. Black hair styled backwards made his ears stand out, eyes warm and shining in his smile. He was beautiful.

“Good evening princess. It’s nice to finally meet you..”prince Park held you like a feather, his jaw sharp as he grinned like a boy.

“You too prince..”you felt out of breath as he danced along with you, his face seeming unreal. It was so easy to move with him, a grace which made everything into a dance of swans. Maybe you could love him, with his gentleness and charming smile but still, you saw a cat grin and sides of lips curled up. You saw that boy even when you gazed at Park. The music slowed down to a stop, Park bowing to you as you did the same, lifting your skirt lightly. Everyone around you joined in the next dance, taking their attention and eyes of you. Prince Park smiled again, his hand stretching for you to take.

“May I have this dance?”you chuckled at him, feeling happy for the first time since you had been told about the bal.

“Yes” he swept your over the floor, eyes lingering on you with so much softness.

“My name is Chanyeol....And I guess I’m almost bethorded to you?” he tilted his head, laughing out as your cheeks burnt red.

“My name is Y/n and I guess it’s true..”you felt heavy saying those words but hid it under a smile, letting Chanyeol run his thumb over your back hand. He saw in your eyes how you covered hurt with gentleness.

Jongade clenched his hand, watching as you and Chanyeol moved across the floor. You two looked like a fairytale couple and he was the poor boy who had nothing but a dream. He shouldn't feel like this, he knows it will only hurt in the end, so he turned from the scene, disappearing to the shadows.

Baekhyun’s mouth hung open as he watched you dance. He didn't believe all the rumors about your looks but now did he realize they gave you no justice. You had this aura around you, something gentil, something strong, and Baekhyun felt regret form in the pit of his stomach.

“You can do this Baek..It isn't hard” Sierra dragged him out on the floor as everyone join into the twirling. She guided him along the floor, trying to find the perfect moment for him to take the princess in a whirl.”Do as you were told and everything will be fine..”

“I can't..” he mumbled, hand releasing from her stone grip.

“You can and you will do it. You own it to Minseok” Baekhyun lowered his gaze, defeat shining in his eyes. Sierra didn't fall for it, only pushing the boy towards you. Baekhyun caught your hand, spinning you away with him, away from Chanyeol. You looked surprised but still had a nice smile on your lips as you let him lead you through the dance.

“I haven't seen you before..” you smiled wider as the boy stumbled through the stepps, looking like a puppy. Baekhyun blushed when he almost fell over his own feet. “It’s nice to meet you”

“Y-you too” he had trouble looking at you, guilt and embarrassment eating him. You were so soft and he had to get you to follow him..but how?

Jongdae slipped around a corner, almost dropping dead as Minseok tapped on his shoulder. His blood turned to ice as he nodded at the older male, leading him to your room and the prize. They moved swiftly, looking like they belonged in the corridors, away from the celebrations.

“Are we close?”Minseok whispered, his eyes shining like a cat and Jongdae could only mumble a yes as he fought an inner war, if he should do this or run for his life.”Good..”

Jongdae ran across the castle, heart pounding and threatening to stop any second. His life flashed before his eyes. Every smile, every tear burnt in him. He could feel and end coming, it made his mind numb. Minseok kept running by his side, glancing down at the wrist watch he wore, counting time. Everything had to go according to plan or else four heads would be lost.

You smiled at the flustered boy, his hands almost holding your. He seemed scared, never looking you in the eyes, even when you tried to get him to.

“What’s your name?”he tripped, falling so he was a second away from crashing into you. Something which earned him irritated looks and words of disgust. You disliked it, the way they watched him, how the boy hung his head lower. You grabbed a hold of his hand harder, dancing with him like no tomorrow.

“It’s okay..Don't mind them, there are just jealous of you”you smiled wide at the boy when his head snapped up at you, eyes large and cheeks pink.”They have no humor and I would chose to spend a day with you over them any time”His lips twitched slightly, almost smiling, and it made you happy, warm in your heart.

“Baekhyun..”the boy mumbled, his eyes shining as you watched him with confusion. His movements had become more confident, head held high.”My name..It’s Baekhyun”

“Oh..It’s a pleasure to meet you Baekhyun..I’m Y/n”

“Take her!” Minseok screamed and Sierra moved like lightning as Jongdae just stared at your wide eyes. Everything happened so fast, your body falling into Sierras grasp, Baekhyun lowering his gaze and Minseok helping to get you out the window, his pocket not filled by jewelry like Jongdae thought they would be.

“Baekhyun! What happened?!”he managed to get a gripp of the boy, the other two already gone but with you. “What did you do?!”

“I’m sorry Jongdae...I really am”and the boy too jumped out the window, leaving Jongdae with realization and guilt.

Screams echoed through the castle, roars from guards to act and Jongdae threw himself out the window just as your door was flung open. It was all planned, Minseok never wanted the jewels, he wanted you. Jongdae lost grip, falling down until he hit a part of the castle which stuck out. He groaned but couldn't stay still, the sound of arrows being fired and burying their head in the stone mere inches from him forcing him to move. Everything hurt but he had to climb down or he would be killed. Jongdae bit his lip, anger bloomed in him but he felt how tears poked at his eyes, the guilt eating him. Another slip and Jongdae fell the last steps to the ground, his body aching. Arms grabbed him and he was about to fight when he heard Baekhyun whisper in distress, the named practically dragging Jongdae from the side and into the shadows where a carriage waited. Everything spinned and Jongade realized that he hit his head falling down. Baekhyun pushed him up and the horses ran the minute both boys landed on the wood. Jongdae managed to catch a glimpse of you, fury growing in his weaking body.

“You promised…”he hissed at Minseok, who merely glanced back from the front.

“I know…”

“Liar”Jongdae snarled quietly before succumbing to the darkness.

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shoujosoulsearching · 6 years ago

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Mars, AKA The Shoujo Manga with Too Much Emotional Baggage for One Woman to Carry

SPOILER WARNING!!!

The Roman god of war, Mars, was said to love violence and conflict--he was known as the embodiment of bloodthirst. Unlike his Greek counterpart Ares, however, who was considered to be more destructive in nature, Mars was seen as more of a protector, a bringer of peace.

With a title like Mars, one has to wonder what side of the Roman god is going to be showcased in the story: the bloodthirsty divine or the righteous guardian? For a shoujo manga, you’d expect it to go the latter, but upon reading Fuyumi Souryo’s fifteen-volume teenage melodrama, the answer to that question turns out to be much more complicated than you think.

The actual story itself has nothing to do with the literal god named Mars--he’s only explicitly shown in the first volume as a statue, which our playboy prince charming, Rei Kashino, approaches and kisses on the mouth. Kira Aso, our introverted and artistic leading lady, is infatuated with this sight and asks Rei to become a model for her to sketch during her free time. From that moment onwards, their relationship blossoms, and they both bring out things in each other that would have never been brought to the surface if they had never met.

While it has its fair amount of stereotypes what sets Mars apart from its contenders is the way the main couple is portrayed. Rei and Kira are individually appealing characters, and their qualities are only enhanced as they grow closer throughout the story.

Our leading man Rei is the first character that truly jumps off the page from the get-go. A motorcycle-riding playboy who couldn’t care less about school, Rei’s a boy with deep-rooted issues and a devil-may care attitude. He has an unmeasurable sense of justice, and while he has a sense of morality, he won’t always uphold it when the situation tests him. If he gets a bad feeling from someone, he will immediately turn to hostility--but only when the event pertains to something he wants, or something he cares about. He understands what the “right” thing to do is, but he doesn’t care. As long as he isn’t stopped by Kira or someone else’s plea, he will fix the problem in a way that satisfies him.

This type of violent behavior would usually be associated with a sociopath, but upon further inspection that turns out to not be the case. Most of Rei’s questionable actions come from a post-conventional reasoning, and it’s apparent that whenever he acts out it’s because he’s either been deeply hurt by something in the past or he’s afraid to lose what he cherishes in the present. I’m not at all justifying his actions, but the point is that Rei has never been a true monster, and whatever monstrous aspects he had to him were eventually blurred away by Kira (who was the first person to ever love him that wasn’t incredibly toxic.)

The main difference between a sociopath like Masao Kirishima and someone like Rei, is that Rei is just a teenager who’s been hurt one too many times and only knows how to self medicate using violence. He had never been policed for his actions in a proper way. As we learn in the last volume, his memories were altered during his time in the psychiatric ward to lessen his trauma. Once you look beyond his blunt and aggressive exterior, Rei is the most genuine character in the entire series. He’s just a teenage boy that’s been through too much hardship that he never deserved, and was never emotionally mature enough to handle all of it. He’s rightfully angry at the world--until he meets Kira.

It took time for our heroine to shine like her male counterpart did, but a few volumes in, Kira becomes a show-stopping character. Originally an immovable introvert only interested in painting and nothing else, Kira grows into her own loving, hopeful person. One of the things I appreciated the most about Mars was it’s portrayal of mental illness--nothing is never outwardly said, but it’s obvious that Kira had been going through not only anxiety but a deep, dark depression she can’t bring herself back from. The way Kira thought about death, the way she always put others needs before her own, etc, made her real and relatable to me on a personal level. I’ve had those same issues my entire life, and seeing Kira slowly and surely come into her own throughout each volume wasn’t just satisfying, was inspiring.

The most tantalizing reveal about Kira and why she acts the way she does is when we learn that she was raped by her stepfather in middle school. Not only did she start isolating herself after the incident, she began to live in her head, where a more sinister, damaged and unhinged Kira would imagine killing herself and those around her. This is an extremely serious subject to dive into--and Mars doesn’t cover up the darkness behind it. It’s not romanticized, it’s ugly and depressing, and the worst part is that we never get the feeling that Kira will ever fully recover from it. Yes, she learns to become intimate with Rei because she trusts him--but it’s implied that in the deepest, darkest parts of her soul, that horrible memory will continue to live on.

The first thing that struck me, and my favorite aspect of the entire series, was how genuine the relationship between Rei and Kira felt--several times in the story there’d be a break where they would just talk, and not talk as in they’d tell each other things that would move the plot forward, or with a clear purpose in mind--they have actual conversations. They talk about each other’s hobbies, about their existential crises, things that actual teenagers talk to each other about. With every heart-to-heart comes another glimpse into who these two are as people, and it becomes apparent that they cherish and remember every word they say to each other. It’s clear that these two characters grow because of each other, and turn one another into the best versions of themselves. They’re honest and authentic with each other in ways only adolescents can be. As two teenagers who’ve never had anyone to be their shoulder to cry on, their relationship just feels right, and their marriage at the end of the series is one of the most wholesome and satisfying things I’ve read in a shoujo manga.

Up until now I’ve sung praises to Mars for the two main characters and their dynamic, but unfortunately, besides a few exceptions, the rest of the characters in the series are either uninteresting, unlikable or just straight up garbage human beings. To keep it short, just seeing Shiori, Kurosawa or Harumi on every panel would get me peeved. Masao Kirishima was the last straw for me, however; once I got deep enough into his arc I ended up putting down the series for a few days, because I couldn’t stand his presence (not to mention the ONLY canonically LGBT character just HAD to be an evil psychopath who wanted to kill people for pleasure…..REALLY……) but I’ll throw in a head-canon saying that these characters only exist for me to appreciate the main couple more (which it did) so I could look over it.

By far Mars’ biggest problem is it’s tone. Soap operas can be fun, don’t get me wrong, and there are plenty of times where Mars gets it right--but also plenty of times where it becomes overbearing. The series was probably best to read week by week when it was being released in Bessatsu Friend magazine; it’s not hard to imagine Souryo stuffing in enough melodrama in each chapter before it’s release in order to keep reader’s interest. Marathon-reading it is very much a different experience. And it doesn’t help that It’s clear that this is a product of its time. A lot of popular shoujo manga in the 90s tended to stretch the drama, i.e. the insane level of bullying, the evil side characters insisting on keeping the main couple apart, etc.

Using an example from Mars, Rei reveals he used to have a brother, who is actually dead, and when Kira asks how he died, before Rei can answer, a man jumps off a building and the police are called. Rei has a panic attack after seeing this, and it’s implied that his brother died from suicide. Then, we go back to the high school where it’s revealed that a character named Kurosawa also attempted suicide, and is currently getting treatment. Then Rei and Kira go out on a date. ALL IN ONE CHAPTER. If you got exhausted reading that, try reading that page-to-page in one sitting. It was entertaining, sure, but it took me out of the immersion every now and again.

I can shit on these aspects as much as I want, but without them, Mars wouldn’t be Mars. It’s apart of its charm, in an odd way, and it only enhances everything the series does right. At times, it’s as if Mars is drowning you in it’s depressing conflict and weighing you down with it’s emotional baggage, enjoying every second of your agony--but in the end it always comes back around, making wrongs rights and surprising you with its tenderness. That’s why I think this manga has the perfect title. I doubt Fuyumi Souryo intended for this, but in its own roundabout way, I believe Mars is an allegory for the Roman god, and a good one that you definitely shouldn’t miss out on.

And I’m giving this one a STAR rating.

(Check out my other manga analyses here, and my standards here.)

(Follow me on twitter @/choerrychrist)

#shoujo #shoujo manga #shoujo caps #mangacaps #screencaps #shoujo screencap #shoujo notes #shoujo anime #mars #mars manga #90s anime #anime #star rating #rei #kira #my review

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hollyhomburg · 7 years ago

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Don't Care if it Hurts:pt.2

(Dog hybrid! + Gaurd dog!Jimin x Reader) (ft.olderBrother! + Mafia boss!Namjoon)

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6

Summary: After a rival gang makes an attempt on your life, Your older brother, the infamous leader of Seoul’s largest gang; Kim Namjoon gets you a guard hybrid; Park Jimin, The reigning champion of Seoul’s underground hybrid fighting ring.

Pairing: Jimin x Reader

Warnings/tags: Past abuse, Blood, Mafia!reader, Mafia!Namjoon, Older brother!Namjoon, DogHybrid!Jimin, fighting, slow burn, general angst, hurt/comfort, fluff, eventual smut.

Wordcount: 6.1k

A/N: I probably could have split this into two parts but I didn't want to leave you hanging after the Jimin/Jungkook fight scene. This part was particularly hard to write because I knew where I wanted to be by part 3 but not how to get there. I know it's not as good as part one but ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Song to play during this chapter: House of cards~

Jimin and his new master arrive at the compound inside of the hour. On the front gate (guarded by 3 guards- probably armed) hung a golden sign; Serendipity Gardens. Jimin felt his eyes widen as they pulled through the gate and into a wide circle, a fountain spitting water in the center.

The place was emptier than a graveyard. There where no children playing in the park. Not a person was walking in the gardens and not a soul on any of the balconies of the two upscale apartment complexes or the smaller but no less grand private residences.

The car pulled left and into an underground parking garage. Other sleek cars were parked here. Namjoon didn’t wait for the driver to open his door when they stopped, and Jimin scuttled after him careful not to fall behind.

In the space that should have been parking, rooms had been erected- some with clear dividers and others out of plain brick. A safe was tucked into the wall as people walked this way and that; some carting crates off to storerooms.

Everywhere there were cameras. Every door had a key card and every person was armed in some way. Revolvers where Tucked into waistbands, or in holsters on their sides, and machine guns where slung casually over shoulders as a man cleaned dirt out from under his fingernails with a switchblade.

People nodded or cast his master greetings some even bowing. Jimin cast his gaze to his master scanning him for any budges- it didn’t look like he was armed- but Jimin was beginning to think that his new master wasn’t the kind of man who ever gave secrets away for free.

He stopped for no one- even as they made their way down a set of stairs almost running into a group of people who were attempting to carry a large box up the flight of stares.

“Take the fucking ramp it will be easier you idiots.” Monster growled. The youths almost dropped the box. Yes, boss, they muttered shaking in their boots. they all Scattered the second they both had passed.

The training room on the third floor stank with the smell of sweat and blood just like his old one, Jimin’s sensitive nose stung. Blue mats where tossed on the floor while a makeshift platform with a circle made a ring in the center, while exercise equipment was pushed against a wall.

Around 20 people were clustered around the ring- watching a fight that Jimin could tell would be over in seconds. Most of them turned to bow to his master. Some of their eyes landed on Jimin- and flashed up quickly to his ears, which twitched anxiously whenever he caught someone staring. Hybrids where a common thing- most people had either met one or seen one, but most people had never seen a hybrid that looked like Jimin. Eventually, their gazes returned to the fighting ring and the two battling it out in the center.

The mint haired man hit the floor with a final thud and did not get up. he groaned “Kook it’s a fucking Sunday- can’t you just go easy on me one time.“

His opponent, Kook; a boy that was both buffer and younger than Jimin smirked. “Ain’t no rest for the wicked Yoongi.” Jimin watched curiously as Kook held out a hand to Yoongi- why would he help his opponent up- it was something Jimin had never seen done.

Yoongi snorted, “Whoever said that obviously hadn’t met me Jungkook.” Yoongi slapped his offered hand away.

“I’m just going to sleep here- wake me up if the boss shows up.” his master cleared his throat. Jimin had never seen someone get up fast as Yoongi; who snapped to attention. Namjoon merely leveled him with a slight smirk. “You know the rules Yoongi- everyone trains.”

“You know I’m more deadly at long distances boss.” Namjoon jumped onto the platform, and Jimin followed carefully, he felt the eyes of the assembled gangsters slowly shifting to him- the newcomer, their master's shadow. Jimin’s black ears twitched, and his tail swished back and forth. he could sense eyes on them- and on the blood that still stained his knuckles. But no one asked his master who he was.

Namjoon jerked his head, and Yoongi made to get off the platform, Jungkook, however, stayed put. Namjoon’s eyes flicker to Jimin and before he could ask- Jimin entered the ring with a sick feeling curling in his stomach.

“Who’s this?” Jungkook asks, his eyes flicker to Jimin’s tail and ears.

“Y/n’s new guard dog- but I want to see if he’s a good fit before I give her too him.” Jimin bristled. Was the fight from last night not enough to convince him that he could fight? He was good- and though he could tell by the way Jungkook moved that he knew how to handle himself, Jimin was better. He could tell by just looking at the way he placed his feet. His master’s eyes flickered to Jimin.

“You know what to do.” He said, and Jimin turned.

Jimin had Jungkook pinned in under a minute- though the young man was obviously skilled- he had never gone up against a hybrid before. People usually underestimated his strength, but his speed was Jungkook’s downfall. Jimin could smell Jungkook’s fury underneath his fingers. Jimin raised a fist- intent on knocking him out and ending the fight.

“Stop,” Namjoon commanded, every inch of Jimin’s body froze, and surprisingly Jungkook stopped too. “Stand and face me.” He commanded Jimin did as he asked.

Shock colored every face around the ring as Jimin turned to face his new master, dread filling up his stomach. His master appraised him with a new eye, slightly amused- but mostly pleased. “Do you know why I just had you do that?” Namjoon asks Jimin.

Jimin could feel every pair of eyes on him and while he’d never been uncomfortable with someone’s eyes on him before- this somehow felt more intimate.

“Because you needed to know if I would hurt a human.” As a hybrid- Jimin’s DNA was programmed to be obedient- to be pliant and not harm his human master- or any human master. The instinctual aversion was something that had been trained out of him by his previous masters again and again until it didn't matter what species his opponent was.

“Smart and strong- what other surprises do you have?” Namjoon says, not looking for an answer. His master turned and left the ring. Jimin scrambled to follow. Behind him, he heard the others rumble- the quiet hum of conversation. “Who’s that?” Yoongi asked Jungkook. Jimin could feel the man’s eyes on him as he trailed away. “Trouble, I think.”

“It isn’t ethical, Namjoon, Hybrids are practically people.” Jimin heard a female voice say from up above him on the landing. Thought human ears would have had to strain to hear his didn’t.

Namjoon had left him waiting in the entryway of your house- the largest and oldest private house in the compound. A set of marble stairs lead to the upstairs and a glittering chandelier at least twice as tall as Jimin hung from the ceiling. Everywhere color was a binary, black floors and a white staircase, white walls with black molding.

“Only half- I don’t see what the problem is.” Came a third voice- not his master, but defiantly male. Jimin could smell that other female scent here, along with many other masculine scents; the most dominant one being his master.

“The problem is that my sister is a god damn social justice warrior.”

“Don’t you mean dog damn?” came that mirthful male voice.

“It’s this or America y/n,” his master said- Namjoon, that was his name, Kim Namjoon. Jimin sucked on his bottom lip. Jimin could hear silence permeate the room and then a breath being inhaled.

“Fine- but you’re dead wrong if you think for a second I’m going to let any of you treat him like a servant.”

“We own him y/n,” Namjoon sighed. Jimin’s ears twitched.

“But we shouldn’t.”

Jimin wasn’t sure that they knew that he could hear them. He heard some shuffling and then a wolfish-looking blond head poked his head over the side of the banister- the male was languidly athletic as he stepped down the stairs.

“So you’re the mutt; Jimin” he said as he ascended, but with a smile. Jimin shriveled his nose at the man, “I’m Hoseok.” He said his shoes scuffed against the black floors.

“I’m pure breed.” He said quietly.

Hoseok grinned, his eyes sparkling, “so I’ve heard.”

Namjoon ascended the staircase next, glancing once back at the top of the stairs to make sure you joined him. They’re you were- the woman from the photograph. Clad in nothing but a white silk pajama set looking absolutely at ease being in that same room of at least 2 killers.

Your scent hit him like a bulldozer- the same smell of blood that was still on his master. He looked from you to Namjoon quickly- not understanding- had he hurt you? Or had someone else? You lifted your gaze hesitantly to meet his. Jimin tried to ignore the way your eyes tracked the way he moved. You watched him not with the air of someone who was threatened by him but with curiosity.

“Y/n, this is Jimin, the hybrid I’ve bought for you to use as a guard,” Namjoon said.

“He really beat kooky? Damn, I didn’t realize that teenager had lost his touch.” Hoseok said, and Jimin wondered if his face was stretched into a permanent smile. A smile that was starting to look more foxlike the more Jimin looked at it.

“He’s practically the same age you where when you joined Hoseok, and besides- you of all people should know not to judge a book by his cover.” Hoseok grinned ruefully at your comment.

He had thought you where beautiful the one photograph but meeting you in person nearly knocked Jimin off of his feet. Every inch of your beauty was almost physically painful to him. Your hair fell around your delicate face as sharp and intelligent eyes wavered slightly as you pushed off the edge the desk and walked towards him.

A bandage was fixed tightly around your upper arm. You held it stiffly- and he guessed that it must be causing you pain. His gaze snapped to it, an action that was not missed by you, you touched it gently.

“This is from an assassin yesterday.” You say in lew of an introduction.

“Why are they trying to kill you?”

You jerked your head in the direction of his master. “Because of that asshole.” Jimin blanched at your words. But Namjoon just rolled his eyes.

“When will you stop being a pain in my ass?”

“When you stop being a prick.” You snapped back. If there was one thing you and your brother excelled at it was arguing. Namjoon turned to Jimin, and he was surprised to see a flush of annoyance- something so human on his cheeks.

“If you ever talk to me that way I swear-”

“-Joon- don’t threaten him, he’s done nothing to deserve it.” Namjoon let out a breath, a slight blush came to Jimin’s cheeks, and he had never had someone defend him before.

“Yet.” Hoseok laughs.

“Will you both stop acting like psychopaths for one second.”

“Sorry love,” Hoseok says, his expression lost its dangerous mirth as he turned to Namjoon. “Can’t change what you are.”

“I’ve never protected anyone before.” Jimin blurted out, All eyes where on Jimin, and he turned quickly to his master. “But I’m good at following orders- this transition will go better if you tell me what to do.” Jimin was ready to get hit for speaking out of turn but his master just looked at him thoughtfully.

“As if he doesn’t do that enough for us all already.” You said under your breath. Hoseok snickered.

“I want you to follow her 24/7, anytime she leaves this compound I want to know, I want to know where you plan on going, how long you’ll be gone- everything. You are not to let her leave this compound on her own and if you can- I expect to watch her in the compound; especially if she leaves this house. Essentially- you are to be my sister’s shadow.”

“I don’t need a babysitter.”

“Yes you do,” both Hoseok and Namjoon said simultaneously. Namjoon rubbed the back of his neck, smiling at his friend’s protectiveness of his little sister.

Jimin stood awkwardly- he didn’t know where to put his hands and he felt uncomfortable being the same room as people who he had just met- and had obviously known each other for a very long time. What was more peculiar was the Envy- harsh and bitter that stung his tongue- he had never been close like this to others. Never had something like this.

Namjoon gestured at Hoseok, and the blond said, “right.” And lead everyone into the wide kitchen. Everything was in shades of silver and snow; the marble countertops glittered without a speck of dust or dirt on them. Hoseok pulled out a bad that sat on the counter, producing an already open box which he handed to Namjoon.

Namjoon pulled out a small bracelet and a cord. “Do you know how to use a smartphone?” Jimin nodded, “this is like that but smaller. Y/n’s and mine numbers are programmed into it in case you need to contact either of us at any time.” Namjoon rounded the table and Jimin held out his wrist for it to be fastened. The watch was a small comfortable weight. He tapped at it experimentally.

3 circles where displayed, with your initial and an M- that stood for either master or monster Jimin didn’t know. There was also 2 other buttons- a capital P and a lower case p.

“You also have panic numbers installed, the lowercase p will put you in contact with someone in the gang, in the event that neither y/n or I are available to take your call.”

Jimin nodded, “what’s the uppercase one for?”

“Essentially, it’s a panic beacon- it won't make a sound or an actual call- but it sends the gang your location and keeps broadcasting it until you end the call, in the event that you or y/n are put into a dangerous situation where you cant get away-“

“it lets us know to come in with guns blazing,” Hoseok said, plopping down onto one of the chairs.

“Great now that we’re done with that- do we still need to talk about…” Hoseok’s voice trailed off his eyes flickering too you and then Jimin.

“Y/n, why don’t you show Jimin the house,” Namjoon said smoothly, eyes narrowing at Hoseok. You rolled your eyes pushing off of the couch.

“Fine keep secrets why don’t you,” you said. Getting up without complaining- Jimin cast a single glance back at his master before following you out of the room.

The walk to his bedroom was both uncomfortable and awkward. The nervousness that clawed at your belly made the words come out in a hurried rush. “The ground floor is the dining room kitchen and rec-room, the second floor is Namjoon’s study and the master suite. Your room is with mine on the Top floor of the gym and upper deck- so it will be a hike every day but Ehh- it’s got a nice view.”

He peered around the corner into the home gym- flat screen TV’s hung in front of a treadmill and a row of expensive exercise equipment that was scattered around glass doors. The deck was vacant except for a simple table and a covered square that must have been a hot tub. You almost felt like he was scanning for potential threats. His ears twitched with every unexpected noise. The Dec had a nice view of your backyard- a garden and a pool enclosed by a 10-foot high wall, but from your floor, you could see over it and into the other parts of the compound.

Inside of the compound, they’re where several private residences with most of them belonging to the members of Namjoon’s inner circle and the largest most lavish one belonging to you and your brother. Most of the rest of the gang- (which numbered in the hundreds at this point) lived either permanently or partially in the two other apartment buildings on the compounds premises. From the outside, serendipity gardens looked like just a luxury estate- but most of the gang activity was focused in apartment building 3 and in its underground parking garage.

“Thank you for defending me from master Namjoon miss y/n,” Jimin said. You smiled at him.

“My brother needs someone to check his ego constantly- and please call me y/n.” he nodded, his eyes meeting yours for a split second as you made your way through the work out room and onto the deck. The early spring air was chilly. But you didn’t seem to mind- your bare feet padding out to the edge without complaint though Jimin could see the Goosebumps rise on your arms. “It’s almost noon, Are you hungry?” you asked Jimin. leaning against the railing.

“No miss y/n,” he said quickly, just as his stomach rumbled loudly. His soft looking ears where pinned to his skull, and you smiled at him- at the light flush covering his cheeks as he looked at the floor embarrassed. You wondered how someone so cute looking could be so deadly, but if he had beaten Jungkook- your brothers best fighter- he must have been.

“Namjoon and Hoseok won't be done in the kitchen for a bit- but I can call for the cooks when they get done, but it might take them a while.” You pushed off from the edge of the Deck. “We could always go out to eat” his ears perked up at that- remembers his master's words and what had happened the last time you had left the compound. “And go shopping for you then too- I’m guessing that those are your only clothes, kill two birds with one stone.” You turned your head, looking at Jimin’s concerned and conflicted expression as he watched you.

“What’s wrong?”

“Master Namjoon said it’s dangerous for you to leave the compound.” You nodded. “And that doesn’t scare you? That it could happen again?”

“Nope,” you said, not meeting his gaze as you stared down to your garden and the blue pool below, and over the wide walls into the compound around you. Seokjin’s residence was right next to yours, but his car wasn’t in his driveway- so he was probably out somewhere doing Namjoon’s dirty work.

Jimin shook his head at you, he knew he wasn’t supposed to question you and your choices, but even he was terrified to get back into the ring some nights, even though fighting was his life- his old life he reminded himself. “I’ve never been to a restaurant before…”

“Then its settled, lunch then shopping- let me get my-“

“Why are you doing this for me?” he asked, and you froze for a second. He didn’t understand why you wanted to leave the compound for him- why you were putting your self in danger just so he could have clothes? He knew he didn’t deserve it. Jimin had spoken without being asked earlier with Namjoon and now again with you. He was practically asking to be hit- speaking out of turn with his master and then interrupting you. But your hand only hovered on the edge of the railing.

“Is there a reason for me not to be?”

“I’m a hybrid! I’m supposed to be taking care of you not the other way around, I’m supposed to be your-“ he remembered the words he had overheard. “Servant.”

“To be honest I’d much rather have a friend.” You said softly not meeting Jimin’s gaze and keeping your eyes on the garden below.

Jesus this was difficult- you could tell Jimin had been through things probably worse than you had. And honestly- your brother couldn’t really expect this transition from fighting to protecting to be easy.

You wished you could tell him that you had no intention of treating him like his last masters had- you wanted him to trust you. Deep down you felt horrible because for the briefest moment when Namjoon had told you he had bought Jimin for you-you had gotten excited because finally, you could have a friend- a companion.

But it was wrong to want something like that- and you hated the hybrid system. Genetically they were so close to people, they looked like them and acted like them, but next to you they had little to no rights. The law viewed them as simple animals.

You had a hard time relating to others not in the mafia world because of your pass (not everyone’s grown up in violence and splendor like you have). Some people thought you were cold and withdrawn. After high school- you had stopped trying to make people understand you, and if you were being honest- you stopped trying to make friends.

You would never tell your brother- but honestly- you were lonely. Your brother was around seldom when you were. And if he was at the compound- he was likely partaking in some illicit activity that he would rather you not Witness for. Your only reprieve was college classes or shopping- the only way you could justify leaving the compound when you risked being hurt every time you left.

You made the effort to eat together at least once a week and saw each other occasionally in the morning. But most of the time you left before he woke up and you were already asleep by the time he got home.

You didn’t know how you could miss someone so much- when you lived under the same roof as them.

Everyone who knew that you where the monsters little sister was terrified of you. They called you the little devil; a satirical nickname, given your innocent and non-threatening appearance. But even the name was enough- You had bumped one of your professors in high school and they had practically pressed their forehead to the floor asking for forgiveness. Even the low-level members of the gang knew not to look at you- let alone flirt with you, or else risk their leader's wrath.

The boys where a different story- they knew you, and where barely afraid of Namjoon. they regarded you as their little sister as well. Though Taehyung and occasionally Hoseok pushed Namjoon’s buttons by being shameless flirts.

“Miss Kim, I-” Jimin swallowed the lump in his throat. He had never met someone who had been lonely like him- not truly. Not another hybrid. Jimin had no one. And here you were- all the freedom all of the money that he had never had and you still felt lonely. With your confession- however intimate- made him feel like he could ask you for something; Something big, something he felt you would instantly refuse.

“Is it alright if I take a shower before we go?” You seemed thankful for the sudden change of topic nodding animatedly.

“Of course! You can use the bathroom in my room- since I’m pretty sure the one in the guest room doesn’t have shampoo yet” you smiled again. “That Is if you don’t mind smelling like strawberries.” You giggled when you turned to lead him into your room, Jimin let his mouth stretched into a small smile.

Your bedroom was a white and silver affair- with a king-sized bed and silver blue settee in front. A pair of doors led to a balcony and 2 others to a bathroom and walk-in closet. You gave Jimin a towel, which he eyed warily when you left him in your bathroom. He struggled with the faucets not understanding why there where two.

He turned the blue one and then hesitantly turned the red one. To his delight the water started to warm- he grinned and turned the heat all the way up and the cold one all the way down. Standing in the stream of scaling water until he physically couldn’t anymore.

In your room you busied yourself finding Jimin a pair of clothes and getting dressed for the day in your usual casual attire. You fiddled with a hat as Jimin lingered in the bathroom. He rubbed soap into his tail and cleaned himself better than he had in ages.

He hadn’t known showers could be warm- he felt knots in his shoulders that had been years in the making slowly unravel. He was slowly starting to realize, with the advent of the towel, soap, and hot water, what he had been missing out on.

And the thought- at how badly he had been treated made him feel like he wanted to cry. All of this felt like a dream- too good to be true. Maybe it would end- maybe Namjoon would regret his purchase and demand that Jay give him his money back.

The thought made him shake, and he resolved to do whatever you said, to make sure you returned to the compound with not even a scratch if it meant he never had to go back to that hellhole again.

He wrapped himself in a white fluffy towel when he finished and opened the door. You weren’t in your room, but a small door to the left was open and he could hear you moving around as he shuffled into the room. “I finished.”

“Great,” you say rummaging through a box. Your walk-in closet that was larger than Jimin’s old kennel. “I’m just trying to find a hat to cover your…” you trailed off when you looked up. It wasn’t the fact that your hybrid was god damned gorgeous- abs stretching for days and deep v that pointed invitingly southwards it was the expanse of his side- bruised so badly that it was nearly black.

“Who hurt you?” you said quietly, dropping the black hat that was in your hands. You stretched your hands out to touch his side and a small growl left his throat.

You flinched back and Jimin instantly felt ashamed for startling you. He wasn’t a wild animal or a threat to you. he wanted to prove that he was worth your brother's investment and he was already fucking things up.

“It just hurts when you touch it.” you looked at his hands and took in all of him. The scars running across his shoulders and chests and you feel rage. Rage that would rival your brothers- rage that someone would hurt a hybrid- a person who was so obviously sweet and unsure.

“I’m sorry for growing at you.” Jimin shrank back. Worried that you were going to hit him. He could smell the anger on you and thought someone your size probably couldn’t do much damage to him he still hung his head. But the touch of your hand was hesitant and gentle as a feather when you brushed not his side- but his split knuckles.

“We’re going to want to bandage those before we go- those cuts look nasty- how did you get them?” you asked softly. Jimin flexed his hand.

“From the fight last night.”

“With kooky?” Jimin shook his head, you reached forward intent on gathering his hands in yours the same way that you had done for Namjoon a hundred times, only too have him flinch back.

“I’m sorry.” You quickly turned to pick up the clothes you picked out for him- a pair of sweats that were large on you and a baggy white shirt that you had stolen from Hoseok.

His eyes snagged on your wrist where your sweater had ridden up. There was a watch on your arm- just like his, just like the one that Namjoon had given him. “I’m sorry,” you said again, you mentally berated yourself- twice now- you had touched him or moved to touch him in a way that was obviously making him uncomfortable.

“Why do you have a collar?” he asked, gesturing to your watch- though yours looked somehow older than his and more elegant, delicate rose gold with a light pink band. You looked down at it surprised.

“This isn’t a collar- it's just like yours, Namjoon gave it to me after someone tried to kidnap me last year. have you had to wear a collar before?” it was something to you that seemed barbaric. Jimin shook his head.

You let him change in your closet before slipping out into your room, His wet hair and ears soaked the top of the shirt turning it translucent. You gestured on your settee before you pulled out a first aid kit.

“Can I bandage your fingers?” you remember to ask, and he nods, sitting next to you and thrusting out his hands.

Your fingers wiped at his mostly clean knuckles with an antiseptic that stung his nose harshly. He asked you what it was used for. You explained to him the proper way to bandage things as you finished his left hand and moved to his right.

He had never had someone behave so tenderly for him. He watched you as you worked. Wondering how someone had been raised in a life like this and still ended up kind.

He was nothing, dirt on your shoes- yet here you were taking the time to take care of him- and you had just met him today. Your compassion did awful things to his chest. Making his heart skip beats and his breath catch in his throat while you prattled onto him about Seokjin the medic of the gang- and the story of him attending medical school.

Water from his hair dripped onto the bandages. You clucked your tongue. “You’re going to freeze if we leave like that. Is it ok if I dry your hair?” he made a non-committal noise in the back of his throat.

The gentle rub of your hands against his skull made him lean his head forward. the delicate grating of the towel against his hair and the back of his neck sent delightful shivers down his back. He held back a noise in his throat as you went to dry his ears. He lurched forward when you stopped and you giggled lightly, smiling a slight blush coloring his cheeks.

“Someone’s needy,” Jimin repeated the noncommittal noise, he had never felt so relaxed before, he could sleep now if not for the hunger knowing at his belly, but he wanted you- no needed you to touch him more. He sat up straight.

“I’m sorry, I don’t know what came over me.” You giggle gently- going to put the towel and his other close in the hamper.

“You act like you’ve never been pet before.”

“pet?” he askes, he understood just not how you were using it. you turned shocked and more than a little angry as you realized that maybe he had never been pet before.

Then as quickly as it had come it was gone, and he was left wondering again what your anger meant. “Its nothing lets just go.”

Several thousand dollars, a meal at a fancy restaurant downtown, and a coffee later, you and Jimin stumble into your house. You can tell Namjoon isn’t home but even still you can see Jimin visibly tense. He still doesn't trust your brother- but you think that he’ll start to warm up to him once he spends more time with the man.

You set the bags of clothing that Jimin had let you carry down on the floor. You stifle a yawn and look at the clock. “its so late!” you exclaim.

“Do you want to go to bed?” Jimin asks you softly, trying hard to take the sexual connotation out of the sentence. He had slowly warmed up to you more today although the hybrid became considerably more withdrawn the more people that were around.

It had been hard at first- to convince him that he could use your (or more specifically your brothers) money to buy whatever he wanted no matter the cost. But about midway through the day he had started to enjoy himself- only after you convinced him to buy a pair of timberlands and running shoes of course.

��Yeah,” you said as you kicked off your shoes and hung your jacket. “My first class tomorrow is pretty early so we should both probably get some sleep.” you helped him carry his bags upstairs. Chatting with him vaguely about your classes tomorrow (a psychology class and a humanities lecture).

The cleaners had done a nice job of getting the spare bedroom ready for him. The sheets the head housekeeper had chosen were silken and black- the same as where in your brother's room. You set his bags on the floor by his empty closet.

“Night,” you say as you hover by the door awkwardly, watching him unpack the clothes he had gotten. He grabbed a pair of soft cotton pants and a white t-shirt and followed you into your room.

You where already in the bathroom, the image of Jimin in your mirror behind you made you flinch, “Jesus Jimin you scared me, did you want a glass of water?” He shook his head, biting his lip, “what did you need?”

For you to touch him again he thought but didn’t say. “Master said I’m supposed to watch you at all times...”

“I don’t think he meant sleeping in the same room as me Jimin,” you say understanding what he meant immediately. You rinse your toothbrush out and don't dare meet his eyes in the bathroom mirror.

“I think you’d be safer if I did.” Those wide windows in your room scared him- it would be easy for someone to climb up to your balcony and get you. If he was across the hall it might be too late for him to save you.

“Jimin I-“

“I want to be good at this job, I want to make master proud of me and I don’t want you to get hurt.”

“But I can’t expect you to sleep-“

“I can sleep on the settee.”

“You don’t have to.”

He patted the silver blue settee at the end of your bed. “This is far comfortable than any place I’ve ever slept.” And it was true- he was used to concrete floors, not the plush memory foam couch; he used straw for pillows and extra clothes for blankets on the colder nights of the year.

“At least let me get you a pillow and a blanket from the other room.”

You handed him the black comforter and pillow and Jimin busied himself in combing through his tail with his fingers while you finished getting ready for bed. You flicked the light switch off plunging the room into darkness. You pulled back the covers and slide into your bed before plugging in your phone and taking off your watch.

Jimin lay with his back against the settee, the black comforter pulled over half his body. Jimin could hear everything- the slight rustle of your feet as they found a comfortable spot on the bed.

“I’m sorry if this is awkward for you- I know you didn’t want a guard dog.”

“It’s fine.” You say softly- and even though you’re feet away Jimin can tell you’re only a few seconds away from falling asleep. “You can be my friend and my guard dog at the same time.” You laughed, and now that its dark and you cant see him Jimin lets the smile stretch his face fully.

Jimin listened until your breathing leveled off completely until he turned towards you, he could see the steady rise and fall of your chest beneath the covers and your head pillowed on your hand. your heartbeat was a comfortable rhythm that his thoughts synced with, the sound a more quiet and relaxing lullaby then he’d ever heard in the kennels.

He didn’t know how to do this; he didn’t know how to protect someone. His body wasn’t made for shielding- only for being beaten back and back and hurting others. And strangely he felt sick with worry about it.

He knew how to act for his old master- how to fight. But he had never done anything like this before. You were somehow not his master; but also his masters' little sister; he didn’t know how much of your orders he should follow and to what extent.

What was more perplexing was the fact that you hadn’t given him any orders or beaten him yet- you had wiped his cuts and dried his hair, all of this felt like a dream that he both wanted to wake up from and a dream that he wanted to never end. He could believe things would stay so good for long.

Maybe he didn’t know how to be a protector. But as he looked at you, looking innocent and small and so breakable- and he decided it didn’t matter.

Master’s orders or not, he would fucking learn.

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captaindoubled · 7 years ago

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Long ass post but I’m in mobile so forgive me: Hella Black Panther spoilers below

It’s been long enough I think so Black Panther Hot Take (tm) that i haven’t seen yet (direct me to someone’s posts/article if they are on the same track) :

It was about terrorism. Or, more the making of terrorists. Sure they had criminals and thieves with Klaue (or however Becky Sue white way they spelled it) but Erik was basically Wakanda’s first terrorist.

The language they used to describe his father was very much in line with they way folks describe terrorists, being “radicalized”. It’s always used in news to mean “when they they turned crazy” when it’s always been “when the straw finally broke and they demand change by any means, even violent ones”

Black Panther didn’t treat terrorist as faceless bad guys to pop off like in other movies and something they “””tried””” to do a bit in the other marvel movies to an extent but failed. Erik was a terrorist with a face. Erik was family. He was rightfully part of that community, Wakandan royalty really (the only way he could be closer to new King T’Challa was to be his brother but that woulda been corny) and through isolation and loss funneled his hurt into anger into violence. Sure he hated Wakanda for what it did (or didn’t do) to help black people around the world but he deep down hated what it did to him. He was left an orphan without guidance. Many terrorist learn what they do from “””legitimate””” state militaries, and so did Erik. Old Tolkien White even seemed slightly proud when he announced that Erik was “one of there” as far as a military person and the skills they trained into him. Being in the military only radicalized him more, like many other terrorist.

People were hot brink mad over “Killmonger was right” because Nakia was right and they felt it ignored her and i get that buuuut, I’ll throw in that Nakia would have never been listened to, even with T’Challa head over foot for her, without Erik. He was Wakanda’s mistake. Their near fatal flaw. It took one person, first his dad, then him, to break Wakanda down to the ground. Poor oppressed people around the world are sad to look at sure, but by Wakanda isolationist principles, they are not their problem and so they only have to worry about their own country (America first anyone??) They were fine with the rest of the world thinking it was a dirty dust bowl because it kept them safe. But all it took was for one person to know about Wakanda, it’s wealth and it’s ability to help the rest of the black people they just let, suffer by hands of the rest of the world and people within Africa.

Nakia was radicalized in her own way because she just did not live in Wakanda the same way people just give their shit away and live on nothing and devote their entire life, body and soul to helping. They are helping people but Nakia was putting herself in unbelievable danger to fight the entire world alone and that’s not good for her. But because she lived in Wakanda, her actions were on aid because she had the means.

Erik had nothin, was shooting hoops in a milk crate and the higher he climbed, the harder it was for anyone bring him back down.

All it took for T’Chaka to decide that Erik wasn’t worthy was for him to be born outside of Wakanda. Isolation is a major contributor to people becoming terrorist. And yes, even white boy terrorist as awful as their are, people pray on their isolation. First generation, second gen, American born immigrants deal with the isolation of their family original homes as well as isolation and oppression from their communities and turn to people that promise that the people that hurt them will pay.

I saw a post a day or so back criticizing the idea that Erik was a product of toxic masculinity and I’d have to agree and disagree with them. When you see just looking at Erik as a dude, sure, that’s not all enough to say the reason he’s the way he is was just toxic masculinity, but when you look at him as a terrorist then yes! He’s absolutely the product of toxic masculinity.

Just breaking it down in girl/boy binary, girls tend to talk through their problems (which can leads to rumination [[which is probably the word lots of folks are looking for when they critique “”tumblr’s”” anti recovery culture]] which is bad and prevents recovery but gives them a chance to vent out some stress) or they internalize which leads them to just hurt themselves (Nakia putting her self in straight danger on the regular to help people [[The fact that T’Challa made her the head of the Wakanda outreach center basically in my opinion will save her life because she’d end up dead at a young age in the way she was going]])

While dudes external, which everyone knows, but also they internalize as well, which starts the whole thing in the first place. Toxic masculinity says don’t reach out for help, or talk to anyone and internet conversations that are basically anonymous give them a place to vent without feeling judged and that’s where a lot of radicalization happens now a days. Erik didn’t talk to nor really trust anyone with his plans and even at the end, he was still in so much pain that and anger and fear to do better or that it could be better, he decided to die instead.

But my biggest biggest support for the idea that it was about terrorism was M’Kabi. He was, as the movie progressed, being radicalized into being a terrorist. All he needed was for someone, anyone, to give him some justice for what was done to him (again framed around the criminal Klawfoot and what he did to Wakanda but really, what he did to my family). M’Kabi wasn’t so far gone because he had people that loved him, and he still loved Wakanda and so he was able to stand down, and even with the people not liking his character I found him just as sympathetic as Erik or another other character because he was hurting, and redirected his energy into someone he thought would change things. (Why we have trump tbh. So many Bernie voters when he lost the primary switched to Trump because they wanted changed, stupid but I understand).

Hell, even if Civil War hadn’t intended it, they got half right the plot line that set up for Black Panther with him and the dude that set in motion the movie ( like I said earlier with MCU tried but failed). He understood WHY he did it, they framed his conversation in a weird way, but I think that showed before he was going to be able to understand Erik in Black Panther because that’s old dude was another terrorist, Erik this time was just very close to home and family.

Before the NSA or FBI come knocking st my door, I’m writing this last part as a analysis of Black Panther in comparison to the US, leave me be please:

The US and other “first world counties” are just going to have more terrorist, either home grown ones are from abroad because they have the means to fix the root cause of problems, but choose not to. And that’s way creates terrorist. Like, even if they brought Erik to Wakanda, what if Nakia never came back to Wakanda and had a child outside of the country, what would happen to her child? What about another Wakandan? The problem was Wakanda’s isolation, not who the person was. The problem was the have the means as ability to help all of Africa for one, but chose not to for their own protection. People that either need help in the way of resources, mental health care, or just respect and assurance that they have the right to exist and not have these ideal capitalist life styles shoved in their face and are failures when they can’t change it. (America creates a shit ton of white cishet male terrorist, they know it, they just redirect their anger to brown and black and lgbt folk and disabled folk and Jewish or Muslim folk in hopes their guns won’t turn back in them. They tell white cishet men that they see infallibly right and all they have to do is achieve this goal post in life to also be the masters of the universe but even they are subjected to goal post moving or literally no ball to get into the goal and they are told as men that it’s because they are failures and not a strategic plan to make more white terrorist to terrorize “other” into submission and do their dirty work of policing “others” for them without legal consequences. Basically how white people got doped as sharecroppers to not side with free blacks against the people who were oppressing them both! That’s why white terrorist groups don’t go anyway, and even with gun violence they should 2nd amendment, because they are a low key state sponsored milita)

Like, again, I get why people were pissed at “Killmonger was right” 1) because Nakia existed and 2) they just probably weren’t in on the joke lol 3) it feels weird to sympathize with a terrorist. But that was the point. And B Jordan acted his ass off to make Erik an unironiclly sympathetic villain. His last line when he died still brings me to tears because that’s such a unique African Slave Trade Dysphoria pain that other people don’t understand. (Which I will rant on that at the bottom because Im pissed at someone’s comment on it)

It is not enough for me to stand before you tonight and condemn riots. It would be morally irresponsible for me to do that without, at the same time, condemning the contingent, intolerable conditions that exist in our society. These conditions are the things that cause individuals to feel that they have no other alternative than to engage in violent rebellions to get attention. And I must say tonight that a riot is the language of the unheard.

MLk, Jr quote on riots that in sure most folk know but I wanted it here in relation to Erik. He did what he knew and you cans abhor the violence but also you have to condemn the conditions that made him Killmonger.

Cause, like I understood Erik’s reasons, his actions were wrong and innocent people suffered. So he’s wrong in that way. But just like in movies and real life, you can sympathize and understand what brought people to those actions. It doesn’t make you wrong or weak or a bad person to want to change what caused a criminal to be a criminal. If anything, the vilifying and pathologizing of criminals prevents real reforms in society that could have prevented their crime. And we are all guilty as fuck of that. (And no, I’m not saying you have to be nice and forgiving and never be angry at criminals because they still did the crime [[most of the time, bias in the law make this hard to deal with sometimes]] but immediately distancing them from “normal people” makes it so the reason they are they way they are never get fixed. We all are the attack dogs against state reform and prision reform because we throw away criminals instead of fixing the world that made them because “I loved a hard life and I turned out fine, what’s their excuse”, different biology for one and modeling of how to deal with stress from family or peers but another rant for another day). But thats why I brought up white Boy terrorist, probably too much for anyone’s liking; there is an underlying reason to their actions and it isn’t just, toxic masculinity or them being entitled or mental illness or whatever other buzz word, but a country that mass produced them and trains them like dogs and sends them off on anyone they think is in their way of their goal. Republicans are always trying to do that by building a divide between Black Americans and Latinx (American or Immigrants) as a way to sick Black people on Latinx if that’s easy to swallow. They do the same with Asian Americans against Black and Latinx people. Give a crumb and say that person is why you don’t have a full cake, the cake they are fucking eating!

That’s how we get respectably politics because it keeps black people from uniting against the folks that are the ones disrespecting them and making black fight fight for scraps of respect. Or African shitting in AfAms or other way around or throw in some Afro Carribaians into the mix and you’ve got three groups pointing fingers at each other while someone robs them all blind

Like Erik may not be dealing with some of those intra group politics going on since his beef was with Wakanda and not the US but he learned how to hate like that, and learned how to external and divide and conquer from the best in the business at that, living in the US. So it’s still relevant on the creation of terrorist.

At the end, T’Challa made a speech that all nations should make, to commit to helping, really helping, because for him, one Killmonger was enough. He would have loved to welcome him into the family as a cousin and not an enemy.

So Dee’s Hot Fresh Take (Tm): Black Panther was about terrorism and what creates terrorist and I think that umbrella covers shit like toxic masculinity and isolationism and Trans Atlantic dysphoira and racial injustice and the like. Don’t gotta agree, all my sources are in my head because I’m on an adderall fuled typing fest on my phone but it’s solid enough. I like this interpretation anyway lol.

———————————

Side rant in Erik’s words, a Household name activist took offense to it (won’t say who they are because I’m not that messy) but suffice it to say, they said something along the lines of celebrating the slaves that made it snd made change and their resilience. Which, you know, dope, but it doesn’t work for Erik nor his story. And I think it takes away a big part of the strength of slaves who ended their lives or the lives of their children rather than suffer they way they did. There is a reason that many black people cant swim, we all know that! It’s because slave owners beat the fear of water into them and the tradition just kept up, more switching to prevent black peoples from enjoying the bounties of nature (and as more research on nature and mental health, a way of preventing black folk healing) but it was to stop slaves from trying to escape AND dying as a form of resistance. When hoteps say the Bible was used to oppression black people and it being the white man’s religion they are only like, part right, like 3% on the mark, because using the Bible, suicide was something punishable in the after life as well and so that prevented a lot of suicides. Abortions fucking crippled plantations sometimes because when the trading stopped, they needed more slaves but women were just not having children as a form of resistance. Death and life has always been a part of resistance and it’s so disengenous to ignore all the slaves that died for the freedom of others, or their faith said that the water would take them back home Igbo Landing Story). People in extreme conditions like they have to always be prepared to die because there lives are always on the line either way. If there Death is meaningful or a mother has to abort every child they have, consentual or not, it’s part of the resistance. And the trauma of it all. We still feel echos of the past in the present but we are so far removed from that very specific pain sometimes that it’s easy to focus on the ones that lived, the heroes, because it gives us hope that it will get better, or we can mobilize for folks that had their life stolen from them because they had more life to live but we sweep the ones that took their own life as if it was the cowards way when we never walked in their shows. And for the writers of black Panther to acknowledge them in the creation of a character like Erik makes me cry. I know when I was younger u tried to separate myself from slavery because it was painful and I heard the Igbo Landing in elementary school and it hurt me so badly I was the only person in my class just uncontrollably balling but I’m older and I respect those people, myth or real, so much. Tbh! In reference to what Erik said, and why slaves drowned themselves to go home, Erik wanted to be burred at sea to return home, to the dead land area, with his dad in their little apartment because Wakanda was nice but he’d never see it as home.

#black panther spoilers #bp spoilers #suicide mention

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t0mat0-pot4to · 7 years ago

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#JayDickWeek2017 Day 1: De-Aging

This is the first time I'm publishing in Tumblr in English so don't be too harsh on my writing.

It's kinda messed up and hard to follow near the end but yeah~

And also, pieces were missing so in your mind fill it up.

Don't mind the time. I really have a messed up schedule and all the international times. And so on and on.

Jason is a kid.

It's weird.

"Thanks Dick...Really..." Zatanna gave him a little smirk, before letting him in. She noticed, quite quickly, someone following him close behind. Once the door was closed from the outside, she turned and stared at them. "I thought practices were between us only."

The guy, who was taller than Dick by a few inches, just remained near Dick. They whispered something to each other before facing her, ready to explain.

"Zatanna, we both know how the magic rules goes around here. And... Well, I pretty much broke the first rule..."

"Just get to the point Grayson," pleaded the host. A faint feeling forced her to keep track of the new-comer, whom looked familiar in a weird way.

"Yeah...I'm sorry. Zatanna, this is...Jason..."

By the introduction, the new guy took the hood and sunglasses used as a disguise. He clearly didn't look at her, he couldn't. Not with with his new reputation. But he was thoughtful to her reaction anyways.

A single gasp. Then quiet. Both men knew where this was leading. It had happened a few times back with other members of the Young Justice and once with the Teen Titans. They expectations were high to get them surprise.

"He is the Red Hood, isn't he? Why is he here? Does Batman know about this? Dick! Why on Earth did you think bringing a serial killer to my house was a good idea?! Do you know what he has done?" Fear mixed with anger, and a touch of confusion was the recipe of her reaction. Before she even knew it, she was on a defensive pose. Dim clouds of purple glitter covered her fists.

Instantly, Dick's body reacted to stand in front of Jason as a shield of some sort. He knew his friend was more than capable to get to Jason, but he had to pretend he could protect his brother for some peace of mind.

Nobody moved in three minutes. Just standing there like a photo. Zatanna didn't even bother looking at Dick, who was to blame if anything happened in the next long hours, but had eyes fixed on Jason's.

The Red Hood.

The killer.

"Zatanna, please listen to me. I am more than aware of Jason's previous actions...on Gotham and outside but you also have to know that..."

Somehow, those words struck Jason like lightning. He knew better than anyone what he did on the streets. He knew why Zatanna was scared and angry. Yet the never noticed how calm Dick was about it, like he didn't even knew the truth. But then...they have fought about it. Every single time they saw each other, they fought. Dick screaming that he should stop, that he could still be good and Jason just giving nothing less than careless words. It had always been that way ever since the Red Hood was born.

"...Just this one time, please. You won't even noticed he is here..." The oldest of the three still tried to convince his friend. Not moving an inche away from Jason. And again, Jason had just noticed how protective his older brother was of him no matter what. "I know he doesn't have any weapons on him right now. I promise that. And...I swear on my life that if anything happens today, I'll take all the blame..."

Things seem to lighten up. Not at the speed of light but improvement was being made. It was a hard time on Zatanna. Surely, she didn't really truly know who Jason Todd was. However first impression meant everything in the world of superheroes. A single mistake could ruin a hero.

"How can I be sure of that?" Her words came out like a silent cry, almost a whine. Of course she hesitated at every single word Dick had said, it was understandable from her.

"You trusted me with your life. Today is no difference." Dick slowly left Jason to approach her. Hands lifted in the air as a sign of safety. A soft grin ran across his face as her hands lowered to her side, eyes now locked in his. "See? It's okay now. You can trust me. He won't hurt you."

"I'll trust you for now. But if he does anything stupid, I won't hold back."

Dick's grin widened quite a lot. He was back to his usual self. Then his attention was drawn back to the other male guest, Jason. With a normal speed he was back in front of him, now facing him.

Jason grunted as the image of his brother appeared in front of him. He really had an ego and was to clearly too proud to let in lower. The recent memory of this morning's chat was fresh on his mind, now regretting the proposal.

"Lil' wing," his voice as soft as usual called, "are you okay? I'm sorry this happened...Guess I should've call her ahead and all that..." He was a bit embarrassed at the scene he has just played, a sign of this were the pale red in his cheeks. His right hand settled behind his head as his eyes looked down.

"Do you ever shut up?" Jason's answer came out aggressive. But this time he wasn't looking at Dick directly. He couldn't do it, even if he tried. Thoughts messed his head around and soon he could no longer think straight.

"You wish I would, don't you?" Joked less worried. At least things weren't awkward as he planned, good news for everybody. Without waiting for an answer, he dragged Jason to follow Zatanna to a special-secret room.

Jason was just staring at the way Zatanna smiled in concentration and how Dick tried his best not to move when something was going his way. It amazed him how real everything was.

As a kid, he used to spend a lot of time in the streets. So often he encountered magicians, even if their tricks were cheap, he loved them. It was one of the few things that kept him busy during the day and out of trouble.

Watching the practice reminded him of himself as a kid. He felt the same way. The exact same feeling of happiness and peace inside of him. The more he thought about it, the less he believed it was all real. But somehow Dick's cries and Zatanna's chuckles kept him with both feet on ground.

Soon he found himself closer to the practice and smirking. He forgot his new life for once since it all started. For once he was not scared nor worried. It was all okay as long as the show kept going.

On the other hand, Dick couldn't stop thinking about Jason. All though his body looked forwards for some attacks, his mind was going on and on about how Jason was smiling again. He noticed Jay's eyes fixed on every inche of him at some point, but didn't gave it much thought.

"Guess the old Jason is still there." Thought Dick.

Dick remembers vividly how, back when he just started the Nightwing thing and Jason was Robin, Jason had told him about loving magicians so much. That they made him happy but taught him that he could change reality at will, and wasn't anywhere near wrong.

That boy, who he holds dearly in his heart, was beginning to show himself without even noticing. Maybe bringing him along was, after all, not a bad idea. Even if Jason hasn't said anything at all, he was showing enough emotions and for Dick, that's enough.

"How 'bout a break now? I seriously need a quick break." Zatanna said as she relaxed all her muscle. It's been no less than three hours, and she could feel the pain in her muscles already. She looked over at Dick, who just nodded in respond. "Okay, I'll be back in thirty. Help yourself with anything you please." Then she disappeared through the door.

Dick quickly took seat in front of Jason, whom tried concentrating on the room instead of the older of them two.

"Sooooo...You do like it?" He asked after failing to wait for him to look at him.

"What can I say?" Came out as a whisper. A really quiet one. And Dick was nothing less than surprise, even if he was faking it.

"You liked it. I saw you smirking and all. Even sat closer to watch." Teased the older with a playful smile.

A delicate blush was painted in Jason's face.

"What the f* is wrong with me?!"

"So you just won't talk to me, huh? Guess I was expecting too much."

"Just talk Jason...Say something for the love of whoever!"

"You know? If Bruce ever finds out about this, I'm probably gonna be send of to Bludhaven or somewhere out of Gotham. I'm not sure anymore about the old man, but he's a good guy."

"Why the hell is he tellin' me this? Wait...Does he think he's gonna get in trouble with B?"

"Bruce is having a harsh time with Damian. The little kid is really getting in his nerves to a whole new level. However, he's is good kid...beneath all that cruel, indifference towards other people, is a scared kid." Dick's voice decrease in tone as he talked, with his small grin as usual. "I'm really trying my best...but sometimes I feel I'm not good enough. Nothing will erase those years with the League of Assasins...And I'm scared that I won't do enough..."

And before Jason had a chance to even open his mouth to respond, the host entered the room. Those few seconds he stopped looking at Dick, made him missed such a drastic change in his expression. When he glanced again, he saw a big smile but knew better than anyone that he was faking it. No-ones goes from talking about a troubled-kid who kills to a happy guy who's life is perfect.

He knew better than no-one how many times this had happened.

And it scared him too.

"Am I interrupting? I can come back later if you want me."

"Oh, no. It's okay. Just trying to get some talk out of Jay." He stood up and stretched. They were going to continue with practice until 4:30 was on the clock, just when everyone knew practice was finish.

Zatanna just nodded and shrugged. She didn't have any siblings so she didn't really knew about the topic.

"So, ready to continue?"

"Sure thing, lady."

The next two hours went okay. Jason couldn't stopped wondering about Dick and it really was pissing him off. Did he do it on purpose? Was he thinking about this through practice? Why did he tell me that? Was he indirectly talking about me? Whatever reason Dick had, it was making Jason paranoid.

...

A spell away from Zatanna.

...

Passed Dick.

...

A direct hit to Jason.

A heavy cloud of purple glitter covered him full body. It spread throughout the room, which wasn't good. The two who didn't get hit, covered their mouths and closed their eyes instinctively. Not a sound was heard until the cloud had completely vanished. As their instincts kicked in again, they rushed to Jason just to find a small child in his place. His clothes were too many sizes bigger. They figure out, without words, the impact must have had knocked him out.

"Zatanna...What...What is happened to Jason?" Fear dripped out of his words. He trembled and couldn't even think of hiding it. Knees were weak. His whole body was sweaty. Words struggled to come out his throat.

Zatanna was quiet.

She was frozen.

A big part of her felt guilty. Felt bad. What has she just done? How was she going to fix it? Was there a way to fix it? But a small side of her was so... happy. Jason couldn't kill anyone, if he doesn't remember who he is. Even if he did, he'd be too weak to go hand-on-hand with anyone.

"Zatanna." Called Dick again. Now with a broken voice.

"I'm...I...This wasn't...I didn't mean..." Guilt was the main reason she feared. Not on what she did but what Dick's actual reaction will be. She didn't know what happened at all. It was too fast.

They both had to take a break. Really. They needed it.

A few minutes of silence, sitting quite far from each other. Zatanna going through the list of spell she was practicing. Dick holding that kid with Jason's hoodie. He wasn't even sure if it is Jason. The first time they meet was when Jay was around 12 and this kid looked 4 at least.

But...

Looking at the bright side, Dick felt quite calm with him in his arms. The slow breathing and tiny body was just too much for him. He had to hold back the tears from his eyes. This little kid was too cute to handle. He did have characteristics that reminded him of Jason.

"Hey, Dick? I think I found out what happened," Zatanna mentioned dropping books on the floor then walked over to the oldest with one. She opened a book in front of him and showed him the spell. It has weird drawing and un-readable writing, if it was actual writing. "It's a de-aging spell, as you could tell by the result. It was an accident. I misunderstood two spells and mixed them and that happened. I might take a bit of time to find a cure...I'm really sorry..."

Sigh. "It wasn't your fault. It wasn't anyone's fault. Just try and look for something that will reverse this... I'll see what I'll do with him..."

"I think it's only fair that I take full responsibility. You know how everyone is going to react..."

"No. I know you mean good but it'll slow your work." Dick gave her a grin to calm her off, before locking his eyes into Jason's body. He wasn't truly sure what was going to happened but the sooner Zatanna starts working, the sooner everything will be back to normal. "He's a kid. I deal with them in a daily basis. It's not gonna be so different at what I already do."

She just stood there silently. Not sure what to say.

"I think it's the perfect moment for me to spend some queality time with him, since I've missed him so much this passed few years." And he meant it. Meant every word. Maybe he wanted to spend time with Jason so bad that everybody else had just disappeared all of the sudden. "Listen to me Zatanna, I really want this to work. And this is the only way it will."

"Dick...I don't want to do this but...if it makes you happy, then we'll do as you say." She said, with a little smirk.

Now Dick was walking with a kid in his arms. It was late as he decided to wait until dark, when he could go from roof to roof without anyone catching him. Although Zatanna had a house near the Wayne manor, he had to be careful in every corner of the streets. No-one could catch him, at least not without his Nightwing suit. His eyes caught dim lights that rushed below him. He feared.

"May I know what you are trying to do?" A soft voice made Dick stop, frantically turning to find the owner of the voice. Someone landed in front of him, and showed himself.

"Tim, what are you doing out so early?" He asked, covering the kid the best he could. However, he knew Tim had seen his actions. He just wondered if his little brother knew who it was.

"I asked first. You tell me, then I'll tell you. That's the fairest exchange I can offer." His hands reached his hips, waiting for an answer.

"Fine. I just came back from Zatanna's house. You know, I help her to practice with her spells and whatever she needs."

"B send me early today as he had to go to a Justice League meeting. Riddler was going to hit Gotham's museum." Explained Red Robin before pointing at whatever his older brother was holding. "What is it?"

"Who is it...Come home and I'll explain. Any chance you could reach B?"

"Always."

After Dick explained everything to the whole Bat-fam, with a straight face before having to take a step back to chuckle under his breath. Nobody said anything for a few seconds, they just looked at each other in confusion. Half of them opened their mouths to talk but closed it later when the words wouldn't come out. The other half still had to put two and two together.

"I know what you might be thinking...No, actually no. Together or not, I'll make this work." Dick's voice echoed in the bat-cave, bouncing at everybody's ears. Jason was still sleeping in Dick's arms, breathing slow and eyes closed tight. "I know he is...I know what he does in his Red Hood suit but now...Now he's a kid and I promise you he doesn't know this. Zatanna is trying her hardest to solve this, and my part is to give him a good time...Just...I'm not asking for everybody's help...I just want all of you to not give him a hard time...That's all I'm asking you...Please."

Still no words from anyone. Dick was starting to panic and his eyes gave him away. They were looking at everyone, not still for a second. And somehow that made things worst for the others. It was hard and nobody knew what to do.

"Are...Hum...Are you sure he doesn't anything about being a grown up?" Tim finally asked, taking a step toward from the back of the room. Although all eyes were fixed in the youngest, he knew that their thought were on him.

"He shouldn't know. Even if he does know, there's nothing he can do until Zatanna finds a cure or something."

"Why don't, I mean, why don't we leave him as a child? You know, if he doesn't know anything then he wouldn't be the Red Hood." Stephanie brought up, even if her own words sounded unsure.

"That's just wrong." His answer was cold and his expression changed.

"I didn't...I didn't really mean it...I'm sorry Dick..." She quickly apologized. Somehow Dick's response just was too much, in a weird way.

"So, B, it's up to you know. Can Jason stay in here or do I have to go somewhere were he can be safe?"

"He is your responsibility now, until Zatanna finds a way to reverse all of this mess." Replied Bruce, taking his Batman mask off to see Dick. Slow steps then a hand in Dick's right shoulder. "Don't worry. He's still family after all." Those words were soft and only the receiver could hear them. Those words were from Bruce, not the Bat, which only calmed him down.

"Thank you Bruce." Whispered back, after offering a small smile. He was tired but he had no reasons to be, he just was. Bruce seem to picked this up easily, since he didn't demand to him to change to his suit.

"Listen up all. I'll be going back to the meeting. I want Kate and Babs covering East side. Damian and Luke will go West. Steph and Duke will go North. Tim and Cass will cover South and the heart of Gotham." Ordered the Bat putting his mask back on, voice deeper now. "Dick will stay as back-up if anything happens, but I trust everyone to do just fine. If by any mean things start getting out of hand, do not hesitate to call me. Understood?"

Everyone replied with nods and ‘yes’.

Dick opted for a bedroom near his or B's for Jason, since he hasn't woken up yet. But because none were available, Alfred just recommended to share his bedroom since the bed it's big enough for both of them and that will be a sure way to keep him in sight. He absolutely didn't think of that and thanked Alfred.

After getting some clothes from Damian, due to the fact that his clothes will never fit him at that age. They were a few sizes bigger but nothing compared to Jason's hood. Jason was dressed and sleeping in bed. Then e changed his clothes for sweatpants and a skin-tight shirt. Comfy and simple. Now, to work.

As hard as it might sound, he managed to convince Alfred to let him stay watching the others for a few hours before bed. Nevertheless, his eyes were watching the screen with a mind around Jason. Ever since this morning he couldn't stop thinking about him. Not only because of the spell but in general.

How much he's changed. How much he missed him. It was a weird feeling. Of course it was. Growing up, at least a few years, had an impact on him...on both. Sure, Jason wasn't the perfect role model back then either but...Compared to now days, Dick can truly say they've grown up.

"Master Grayson, I'd like to point out you've staring at a message for more than 20 minutes. Should I be concerned?" Alfred's voice bought Dick back in his feet. Perfect timing like always. Just there when you needed him, or advise.

"Yes...I mean no. No. I'm just so over-worked with the Jason thing and some other cases from Bludhaven."

"May I recommend you something master Grayson?"

"Sure. I can't say no to advises when I need them."

"Go to bed. Now you're tired, so is your brain. Rest and tomorrow you'll see the image better."

Everything happened so fast. But now things seemed to go as slow as it could just to annoy him and the worst part is that it was working. Again, he had no real reason to be annoyed but he was. And he hates it.

"Hey, Jason?"

"Get the hell out of my house."

"Just listen, ok? Today, I've got practice with a magician. Want to come?"

"Why on Earth, on my right mind, on my common sense will I go with you?"

"C'mon. I promise you'll enjoy it."

"Sure pretty boy."

"Do it for the good old times."

"It wasn't good for me. Dick, hear yourself talk for a second. B doesn't even know you are here. You're asking me to go somewhere with you for the 'good old times' crab. But have you forgotten what really happened in the old times?"

"No, I haven't. Not a single day of my life. B's parent died. My parents did too, then yours. Tim's...I get the point but what I mean is when being a Robin gave you magic."

"Don't use that on me."

"Just..For the old Jason Todd and Dick Grayson, ok?"

"Whatever..."

And now he was that one regrets taking him. If only he had knew but there was no way he could know. Still he blame himself although he told Zatanna that it was nobody's fault.

Eyes caught on empty-nothingness dark. He had heard the others coming back and quietly getting to their rooms, he grew up there. He knew every single sound, even Bruce's. One thing he was glad for was that no-one checked on him as he knew he wouldn't be able to provide a convincing answer.

Midnight and his eyes were as open as today's morning. Thoughts, thoughts and more thoughts. One lead to another, then two more, then four, then twenty. All around the one little person sleeping in front of him.

Despite the fact that it was way over bed-time, he stood up and walked to the training room. Not the only below in the Bat-cave. Admitting defeat to his mind, his body did nothing more than train as a way to feel tired. He became so numb about everything when he trained that completely forgot to go to bed that night. Basically just working out like mad with short breaks.

"Dick?" Tim's voice alerted Dick's senses. "What are you doing in the gym? It's like five in the morning right now."

"Is it? Sorry, I didn't know what time it was. You know how I get when I work out." A bad excuse, even he was aware of it, that Tim would never take.

"You've been acting weird ever since yersterday. Something's off?"

"Perfectly fine. I just didn't feel like sleeping so I got myself busy with something." Standing tall, not showing any signs of exhaustion compared to the younger brother. "Why are you up so early anyways?"

"Just woke up and couldn't go to sleep again. I was passing by then I saw the door opened and I had a feeling it was you. Since Kate didn't stay, neither did Babs. Steph is too noise. Cass wouldn't come here if she was to wake up early. Duke is usually up right after Alfred is. Luke doesn't wake up 'til breakfast. And Damian will be on the cave."

"Well, they don't call you a detective for nothing, huh?" Dick joked before stretching his legs and lower body. "Wanna join me? I promise I'll be quiet."

"Then I should be scared." Tim chuckled like Dick did. He entered the gym, closing the door behind him. As much as he hated it, he choose something near Dick. It was always safe near him, in all senses and he didn't have a clue on why this is. "Wanna tell me some juice story?"

"Wow, I thought you wanted quiet."

"Did I?"

"Ever since you joined the Young Justice and Damian joined the Teen Titans, I've been pretty lonely." The oldest started, focusing his eyes in his own workout. "And Jason's been with the Outlaw thing with Bizarro and Artemis."

"Huh? I thought it was Arsenal and Kori. Wait, no. Nevermind. I don't even know who is in who's team anymore." Tim held his head with his left hand, trying to remember the last files of the lastest team from the Watchtower and Bat-computer. When nothing popped in his mind, he gave up. It was his normal morning schedule but without coffee yet.

"All of you make me proud." Mumbled Dick without looking up. His muscles started to ache but time taught him that he could take more than this in worst conditions. "Teams. Leaders or not, you have teams. And that's all I care about right now, so go make your big bro' proud."

"I can't do it without coffee..." The younger one struggled to stand up, which was obviously faking. Dick glazed over his shoulder to see his brother trying to stand up, with a little laugh he stood up and helped him get up on his feet. "Thank you my knight in spandex...Wait, now that was awkward."

"Let's get you your coffee then we'll come back later." With his right arm he pulled Tim to his chest by his neck. They both laughed as some memory was remembered, both two different memory. "It's Saturday, wanna come with me to the mall to get some clothes for Jason? I could use an extra hand."

"Sure...It's just...You are gonna...WE are gonna be on the news, know that?"

"Hum...Like I care at this point.

(Jason is only 4 years old and his first languaje isn't English so~ <Yep, it's pretty basic English>)

It was probably around seven-thirty that Jason finally woke up.

He was a confused little boy in a giant bed. Clothes bigger than him. Nothing around him looked familiar but they just woke his curiosity up. As fast as he could, he got up and started checking all the drawers and closest. Going on and on around a stranger's stuff, with a careless carisma. Although the was careful not to take anything out...just in case.

"Well, morning. You've been sleeping a long time." Jason's eyes caught someone big and built up. Not a scary person but he didn't trust a stranger. It was strange because, well, he looked familiar. Their eyes meet and it was tricky somehow. The mix of excitement and confusion was equally divided between them two. No a word. No a motion. Just staring into each other's eyes trying to figure out what to do next.

"Who you?" His shy question drew Dick's attention quickly, but he didn't move. A few second more of silence before an answer came out.

"I'm your friend," responded softly. Suddenly he found himself shaking slightly like he never experience nervousness. Like it was a new feeling. Absolutely nothing stayed in his mind long enough to give it much thought, only few broken phrases and loose words.

On the other hand, Jason was just curious. This man, standing feets away from him, was just an interesting person. Not only because he was older but the fact that he claimed himself as his friend played a big role. Three steps closer, their gazes still holding together.

"I am hungry," demanded the youngest holding his tummy. "I wan' foo'."

A chuckle filled the room and without noticing Jason was high above the ground, held in the stranger's arms. He couldn't help but hold himself to the shirt. He also notice he was moving from his initial place, maybe a few inches but nothing big.

"My name is Richard, but you can call me big brother." Wanted to say Dick but restrained himself from doing it. Perhaps it wasn't the right moment...Perhaps he didn't want to be seen that way to Jason.

"What your name?"

"My name is Richard, and you're Jason."

"Hum...Jason?"

Nobody complained, really. Considering the fact that neither actually had full time to take care of him, they let it passed. But whenever Dick needs them, they don't hesitate to lend him a hand.

"Tem?" Asked the little boy walking towards his caretaker with a drawing in his hands. Tim left enough space in the solo sofa for the little one to climb up.

"What's up Jay?" His book rested in his lap as he offered full attention to the new-comer. It didn't take him long to see what was the matter.

"I draw thi'." He held the paper above his head in a weird angle but tilted enough to let Tim see it. After that he lowered in his lap, glancing at it proudly. Then he started pointing at the drawings. "Thi' is you! And thi' is Damien." He named first. The oldest noticed something particular about the drawing.

"Why are we dressing like that?" Curiosity took over as they were all dressing in their suits.

"Wayson show me photos!"

"Oh! Silly me." A laugh scaped his lips. "Do you have a pencil?"

"For what?"

"To write our names in the paper."

"Oh! Yes!"

"Bab!" Called the young one as he rushed to the kitchen.

"I'm here Jay. What happened?" She questioned closing the fridge after putting some stuff on the bench. When Jason was next to her, she crouched down running her right hand on his cheek.

"Alfew say to go shopping for thi'." Carefully, like it was glass, he handed a piece of paper to her. He didn't know what were those things but figure out that were food since he had heard them talk about it before.

"Oh, sure. Wanna come?" She asked folding the paper and putting it inside his jean pocket. The enthusiasm in his face gave himself away. "Ok. I'll get my purse. You go tell Alfred. No running." He nodded in response before walking away, but started running when he thought she couldn't see or hear him.

"Kath," sobbed the little one as she rushed to him. When she was close enough, he pointed to his knees with a few scratches and blood.

"Oh dear, what happened?" She interrogated as she picked him up to take him inside the manor. Inaudible sobs still coming from Jay kept him from telling her. "See baby, if you don't tell me, I can't do anything to avoid that happening again. Do you understand me?"

"I was on the tree and I fall." Confessed hugging her by the neck. "It hurt."

"Worry not! I'll take care of you baby."

"Damean?"

"What is wrong?"

"I found hurt bird. Me want to help bird."

Damian went for everything they will need while Jason cleared a table to work in. Once the older one was back, the younger sat patiently. Due to his lack of understanding of the animal world, Damian did everything to help the bird.

"Where did you found it?" Asked Damian while patching the creature.

"Outside under tree. You think he fall from tree?"

"I think a lot of things but that sound accurate."

"Stef, Stef." It was late night and Dick wasn't home from a mission so Steph offered to look after the toddler. "I wan' cookie!" He demanded in a non-scary way, more like a plea.

"It's almost midnight Jay-Jay." She picked him up as she headed to the kitchen for some water. Although she was an active person, Jason had more energy in him for some reason. "Why are you still up?"

"Wayson not hea'. Me waiting for him."

"Aww, that's so sweet of you but I promised Richard that you'll be in bed before midnight." Carefully she settle the younger one on top of the table so she could grab a glass for water. Always double-checking he wasn't grabbing anything or moving.

"But me hungry."

"Jay-Jay, you know I'm not allowed to give you treats after dinner." She glanced at the cookie jar on the other side of the table. "But if you don't tell anyone, I could give you one."

"I pomised."

"Luk, is Wayson home?"

"No. Richard is in a meeting with Bruce." He just stood there, fixing his tie in front of the mirror with a toddler leaning in the door.

"Can I go too?" Jason requested, hopefull. In some way he wasn't looking to get out of the mansion. Sure, it was cool and big and had a lot of things but he felt like he belonged in the streets...And he wasn't seeking for answer...yet.

"Gotta ask Alfred first, ok?" His hands rested in his hips as he turned to him the little kid. Maybe it wasn't that bad after all, nobody seemed to complained so why not take care of Jason for once.

"I go ask him!"

"Caz? *Alfew say you hea'." Before entering the room, he waited for an answer. Which was a simple 'Come in'. "Can you read book for me? Everybody is busy." He was hugging a book, which was almost the size of his chest.

"Hum, sure thing Jason." She settled her own book down, and lowered the classical music playing on her phone. Jason swiftly sat next to her giving her his book. "Where did you got this from?" She asked curiously as she recalled seen this somewhere on the manor.

"Wayson say the book is mine." He replied with confusion in his voice. He doesn't remember this book from anywhere, and he can't even read at this level. Something seemed odd but suddenly increased when Cass started reading. Even the text sounded familiar. The book cover too.

"You okay Jason?" She asked leaning the book on her lap after she noticed him not listening at all. The thought of smacking Dick in the head for giving Jason one of his old possessions rushed to her mind.

"Thi' book mine?" He asked, looking at the pages filled with words in amazement. He hasn't connected two and two together and hopefully he wouldn't do it now, at least that's what Cass wished.

"How about you read with me?" She rested the book between them, catching Jason's attention. She started pointing at the first words then read them, a mumble tried following her. "Slowly Jason. I don't understand you."

"Sowwy."

"Duk, I like thi' park very much." Chanted Jason while swinging back and forth. The other kid's laugh was as loud as his, so there wasn't any competition between who's the loudest.

"Yeah, it's nice." Duke planted himself next to the swings, to looked after a Jason. Anyone who had taken Jason out had to run to chase him down and he didn't really wish to do that. "Did anyone take you here before me?"

"Dunno. I remember me hea' but dunno who take me." The thought of having been here already was present every passing second. Maybe it was just his imagination but it felt real. Even he felt like someone was pushing him in those visions. Familiar laughter. The sun bright and hot. But then it all faded away whenever he was about to see that person behind him.

"Oh...Hum...Forget it chump. Let's go to the slides, shall we?" He always messed things up but Jason just got up and pulled him to the slides. Saved by the bell. He feared not running the same fate later on.

"Buise! Buise! Look! Look!" He was doing simple backflips, which he learned watching the rest doing it. Bruce had to stop looking at his computer to see the marvelous work Jason was doing on his own.

"That's amazing." He forced himself to get up and go to the bed were Jason was, and patted him in the head. "I'm so proud of you Jason."

"Dad...?" He called not sure if he could use that word.

Warmth filled Bruce. And as much as he hate to admit it, he was touched.

"One day, I gonna be like you!"

"You don't want to be like me Jason."

"I do! You good person! You help people! You give them your money and they build better things."

"Yes but..." It was wrong telling him off. He was a kid after all but soon he'll be his old self. "When you grow up you will understand what I mean, but now you have to be Jason. The one and only Jason Todd. And trust me when I say that I'm proud of you...Even if you have done wrong. I'll always be."

Jason didn't understand what Bruce meant but felt like hugging him, so that's exactly what he did. He got up and hugged Bruce. Soon strong arms surrounded his tiny body.

"I love you dada." He whispered.

"I love you too, Jason.”

Nearly two months had passed and Dick will always check on Zatanna at the end of the week. Since the others were getting along with Jason, he had time to continue his Nightwing role around Gotham...

But it was extraordinary how everything was different without the Red Hood on t streets. Kids will usually come up to him and ask for Red Hood, and each time he made a new excuse. From fighting aliens in another universe to punching death in the face. The more he tried to convince them that Jason was coming back, the more anxious he was about it.

He couldn't denied loving Jason as a toddler but...

He wanted his Jason back.

He wanted it more than anyone knew.

He wanted the boy that got stolen from him. The boy who died on the job and came back later to become an outlaw. The boy who saw him grow up in the Nightwing suit. He wanted that boy back.

And the more he craved for it, the farther it looked.

Those nights with the kid in his arms were the only thing that kept him sane.

The fact that Jason, as Robin, would come up to him to cuddle to sleep hunted him in the little boy.

<<Hey, Dick?>>

The ringing of his phone woke him up at four in the morning. Without trouble he managed to grab his phone and answer. "Zatanna?"

<<I finally found it. I'm so so so sorry it took me this long.>>

"It's okay." He gave a pause to yawn. "When do you want me be there?"

A pause.

<<I thought I'd call you before-hand so you could spend some quality time with Jason, since things are gonna go back to the way they were before.>>

"Oh..."

<<Is everything okay?>>

"You have no idea how much I've been longing for this moment...But now that you found a cure...I just realize how little time I had spend with Jason this 2 months...How selfish of me..." He smiled bitterly. His eyes searched for Jason's body, who was hugging his chest from one side.

<<Well, you are the one who's gonna decided when I change Jason. So, you still have a lot of time.>>

"Yeah but...But he deserves to be himself..." He changed the hand he used to answer the phone to his left hand so his right hand was free. Cautiously he ran his hand across his messy hair, while he thought.

<<There's no hurry Dick, don't stress yourself over it.>>

"I'm trying Zatanna. I'm really trying."

<<You know, spend today with him and tomorrow both of you come to my house. That's my option for you. Now it's all up to you.>>

"Yeah...Anyways, what are you doing up right now?"

<<Couldn't sleep but now that you mentione it, I'm getting kinda tired.>>

"Take care."

<<You too Dick and don't give it too much thought.>>

Dick switched his phone off and left it on the night table. It was dark in his room but early birds were singing outside his window.

"Wayson?" A tired child voice woke Dick up from his thinking. "You ok?"

"Yeah, yeah. Go back to sleep lil' wing, it's too early."

"Is okay. I not tired." He let Dick go, sitting up to see the oldest in the eyes. Something like a flame sparked in the oldest one's eyes, with even as a child he could tell that flame was tired and sad. "You sad, why?"

Dick didn't reply instantly like usual, now he really needed to think every single word he was to say. It was his last chance and he was losing it already.

"Want to hit Gotham up?" He proposed before standing up to stretch. He felt eyes staring at him in confusion, so that was his clue to turn around and face the toddler finally. Smile as bright as a sun, eyes shining like midnight stars. "Come on lil' wing, it's early and I don't want to sleep anymore. You coming or staying. Hit or miss. Last and only chance."

Jason was quiet but didn't take long to respond.

"Where we going?" The youngest asked standing up in a jump. His hands were fists ready to punch the sky. He was ready to rock anything.

"We'll see when we are out there."

So now, there were two guys dressed in black. One old enough to have a job and the other one older enough to still have his night lights. The oldest clearly knew what he was doing, jumping from roof to roof like there was a safe net underneath it all but no. He looked freed after so long. He was one with a wind and each jump meant less and less fear. On the other hand, the toddler was as excited as his partner. Sitting in his shoulders, holding himself from letting go.

Their first stop was the Gotham Museum. They climbed, the oldest climbed while the youngest held him, to the top were glass panels that served as roof-tops. With clean moves and noiseless actions they managed to open one of the locks without breaking it. With rope and a hook they slided down to the first floor. Like child's game they outsmarted every security lock and every security gadget they had. Careless of being caught on camera as masks covered their faces, even smiled at them before disappearing to the next room. Fourty minutes was up and they were gone.

Second stop was the zoo. It was easier as the only obstacle were slippery walls. Most animals were woken up by smells and some stayed in their sleep. As entering the zoo wasn't a challenge, they traced down the aquarium. It was a whole new view of the zoo.

Hospitals to leave some cards.

Business. Fire-department. Anything that was a building could be entered by them. Even the Wayne Company was infiltrated. By the time 11 in the morning they were done with a big part of the main buildings.

"That was fun!" Exclaimed Jason taking his mask off to set it aside. Dick was changing his clothes to more *normal clothes, so did Jason. "Now?"

"Breakfast then I'll show you another part of the city."

Dick was in his Nightwing suit, and Jason with old clothes. They were in the sewerage, in an abandoned part of it. It was all dry and stuffy. Rats and rubbish, like a typical American-movies. Although Nightwing was just checking some weird vibration that the Bat-computer picked up from last night. Jason kept asking questions about it, especially why it was abandoned. At the end they made up a non-real reason.

Dressed as normal people, covering most of their main characteristics. They hit the poor side of Gotham were the streets were busy like every other street. Magicians doing cheap tricks was the main show that caught Jason's attention. It was a total deja vu. But didn't say anything. They kept moving. Helping whoever needed it. With Dick beating few bad guys who thought were king of kings.

Afternoon came and now the theater was the point. Movies and movies. Popcorn. Drinks. Candy. More movies. More candies. And because it was sort, they went to the mall to see and purchase random items they just gave away randomly to strangers they saw.

Then night came. It wasn't safe to take Jason on patrol so that was out of boundaries, so instead they just stayed home and read some books. Time passed really fast as they had a good time together.

Midnight was here and Dick's mind started getting serious. He had clearly enjoyed today's activities more than any other day but it was time to face what he's been avoiding all day.

Jason was so different to Dick now. It wasn't a side he'd never been allowed to see from Jason, but now things started to make sense or at least to him. Jason's childhood was taken away from him the day he was born. It was rough but he managed to pass another day each night. The kid was the only part the was worth keeping after all...

Now he had to say goodbye to it all, once again. Tomorrow Jason will be back and the kid will be hidden in the deep of their memories. It was too much for Dick. It was always too much for him. The second everything happened, he knew things weren't going to be easy...especially for himself.

"Jason?" Dick called sitting on the edge of his bed. It was time to say goodbye. Jason rushed to his side with no hesitation, but the look in the foreign eyes told him it was serious. "You had fun today?" He started.

"Yes..."

"I'm glad." He bit his lower lip to hold back everything for a few more seconds. "I love you, did you know that? But...I know you aren't going to understand what I'm talking about but...

••••••••••••••••••

"Don't talk to me Grayson. Stay away from me...please..." Jason was back, just like Dick wanted at the beginning. Zatanna let them talk so it was only them two in the room. Jason was backing away from Dick, even if he didn't want to do it he had to. After revealing the truth.

"Jason, please, listen to me..." pleaded the oldest. Voice at the edge of breaking and eyes cristalized. "Just...Just tell me...Tell me and I'll leave you alone...I'll never bother do anymore..."

...I know you aren't going to understand what I'm talking about but...I love you. Not the way I love Damian or Tim...Not even Babs...

"I can't do it!"

This is probably my hardest fight ever since, well, you are a kid right now. Everytime I see you in this state, I blame myself. If this was an accident, I can't imagine what will happened if someone try to hurt you on purpose...

"I can't answer..."

And I know that you don't love me...I don't even think you see me as a trusted person. And I understand. I have failed you many times...But now...But I'm making my biggest mistake...

"Dick, don't do this..."

...by loving you and telling you. Maybe you won't remember this tomorrow when Zatanna reverses you to your normal age and it'll be okay, but if you do...

"Don't do this to me..."

If you do remember this tomorrow. I just want to let you know that I'll accept whatever your answer is...I can't force you but I can't keep myself from breaking everytime I see you and know...

"Don't do this to yourself..."

...and know that you are slipping away from me. It hunts me to know that I can't be you with. It hurts me to know somebody else will make you happy... But I need to get this out of me. I'm sorry if I ever disappointed you...

"You'd never disappointed me Dick..." Jason's whisper brought tears to his eyes. Dick rushed and hugged him tight. "You are an idiot."

"I'm sorry..." He whispered back. "But I love you. And I don't know if that's enough to warm up a broken heart..."

Jason was crying in Dick's shoulder. He hated that he remembered everything that happened when he was a toddler. Especially because of Dick.

"I've loved you since I saw you. And I felt in love with a kid with issues. I had just broken up with Babs, so I didn't know if it was right to do a move. Then years passed and you died...You don't know how devastated I was. Knowing I could have done something...Stayed back in Gotham...Going as back-up...And my chance was off...

}But I never learnt to stop loving you so I lived with a broken heart hidden far away from anyone. Then the Red Hood and the outlaws. Another chance gone... I saw my chance come and go...And didn't do anything...

}And I hate myself for it. All this years and I just needed to ask a simple question...Since this is my last chance...Jason, will you be my boyfriend?"

Dick was home.

Dick was all he ever wanted.

All he ever needed.

"If it doesn't work?"

"We'll make it work. As long as you are with me, everything will work..."

"Then we are in this...together."

#jaydickweek #jaydickweek2017 #jaydick #Toddler!jason #Batfam #batfamily #my writing sucks #Jason todd #richard Grayson

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vesperlionheart · 7 years ago

Text

Dream Sweet in Sea Major 2

When considering traditional standards of beauty or masculine charm, the features that made Yagura recognizable were not often considered. A notable scar below the one eye, irises colored bleeding pink, and a diminished stature that confused him with children if viewed from behind. No, Yagura was not what tradition would call beautiful, but he was other things.

Among those things he was old, considerably old, and in all the years of his long existence he had learned how to be. He knew what angles worked for him, what lighting suited his features, and how to lower his tenor to a velvet edged voice that could turn razor sharp in a second. He knew how to hold himself, how to dress himself, how to carry himself. He knew his worth and his worth was pretty damn high. The world was meant for him and was his. He acted as haughty as he pleased and the world slid right into his palm.

It gave him no little delight to be proven time and time again that the world was his to manipulate and take from as he pleased. The woman in the doorway seemed to do nothing more than stoke his already engorged ego.

There was blood across the floor and a dead hand under the toe of his designer shoes. Yagura leaned his head to the side and lowered his lids before lifting a rolled cigarette to his lips and cupping the end. A small burn of red and the end caught and began to smoke.

With the toe of his shoe he poked under the dead hand and kicked it up so it flopped back down onto the face of the corpse just as he took a long drag to exhale in semi dramatic fashion. The woman in the doorway didn’t move, and her eyes were still glued in appreciation to his figure even though half the other employees were scared and hiding.

“That’s enough for now,” he said to the other boys, turning away so the tail ends of his jacket flapped like a cape behind him. It made his walk all the more purposeful as he walked past the hungry woman and left her wanting. He didn’t even glance her way as he called out to the boys behind him.

“I think they got the message here. We’ll be back in the hour though if they step into our turf again.”

“You think we needed to leave so few alive?” Haku asked in a clear voice that reminded Yagura of the ice.

“Ao?” Yagura grunted before exhaling smoke again.

Ao came up behind Hake and purposefully stopped to turn and look behind them before pulling his gun out from the front breast pocket of his gray pinstripe. He aimed in less than a second and recoiled only slightly when the shot rang out and sank into the woman in the doorway’s forehead.

Slowly, purposefully, Ao put his gun away and reached for his hat instead. The rack had all their hats, as well as a few others that would never be worn by their owners again.

Yagura fit his fedora and pulled the front down low over his eyes before stepping out. A thin mist had settled and every so often the rain would come and wet the world further. It was perfect weather and the Mizu boys were all the stronger for it.

Haku begrudgingly followed his betters out and kept his head down, least his questions lead to more avoidable bloodshed. One woman was too risky to leave alive if she sported a handgun in the belt on her thigh? Apparently.

Ao drove, but Yagura rode from the backseat and was the real directioner for their group. If he didn’t want to go back to Mei’s place than they didn’t have to. She was technically their boss and really the only person that could handle Yagura enough to boss him into doing things for her.

It didn’t take long before they were back in the circle outside the estate. Before the rain could let up the trio exited their car and made it inside where the redhead of thought showed herself.

“And?” she asked, brandy tumbler in hand and eyes expectant. “How did it go?”

“As expected.”

“How many loose ends?” she asked, lips on the rim. Ao moved to stand close to her nearly behind her.

“Around four or seven. We shot the mole from the gentleman’s club.”

“I knew you would,” Mei sighed, shaking her head almost fondly. “I won’t ask why or bore myself with the details. Say what you have to say and move on. I have my own business to attend to.”

Yagura paused. “Your own…what?”

He was being brushed off.

“There has been a development and I am putting more of my efforts into rooting out the black market dealers in the Barren District. They’ve been…concerning me after tonight.”

“Why. They’re of no consequence to us.”

Her back was to him as she looked to the far wall where a map of the districts was drawn up and put in simple black ink on tempered rice paper. “Someone claimed they were selling mermaid tail again.”

“Tragic. Since when were we bleeding hearts?” He reached to light another white cigarette but kept his hands from reaching, knowing Mei didn’t like the smoke in her presence. She hated the smell, too.

“They’ve been on my nerves even without this last incident. They’ve become emboldened and tried to bring in what they shouldn’t have from the deep places. They mess with the ancient things and they will feel a swift and just wrath.” Mei looked away from the map and glared at something on the desk. “I don’t want to be swept up in their undertow when justice comes calling for them.”

He frowned and almost glared at the women he considered too hesitant to take on an entire district in management. He almost regretted sleeping for the last thirty years and leaving the position of leadership vacant for whoever could grab it best. He had no desired to be in charge again, the responsibility was too burdensome and he enjoyed his freedom too much to chain himself to an idea, but Mei irked him. She settled under his scales the wrong way.

“Are you planning on involving myself and the others in these concerns or do you still want me gone?” Yagura asked, shifting the weight of his body from one leg to the other. He was ready to move one way or the other, not that he cared.

Mei turned back to look at him and the red of her hair flickered brilliantly as it reflected the healthy glow of the nearby fire. There was a crackle of charred wood breaking down between them before she found the words she wanted and nodded. “No. You may go. These matters need not concern you. I apologize for keeping you longer than need be. You may do as you please.”

He was dismissed so easily. She could have, but she didn’t ask for his help, even after he brought it up. Could she really be so foolish to ignore his aid?

Fine.

“As you say,” he muttered curtly before turning on his heel and making for the exit.

Yagura slept for a day or two, longer than usual, and woke feeling a bit less confrontational, but not fully rested. There was still a beast inside him that wasn’t done pacing. His agitation took him down to the garage.

“I’m sorry, but the car is out,” Suigetsu said, meekly ducking into his shoulders as he tried to shrink.

“What do you mean the car is out? Who took my car?”

It wasn’t really his car, but no one would dare touch it without him and he had come to grow found of the automobile. No one had ever taken it on their own before. It was unexpected.

“S-sorry sir. Um, Mei told Haku to take Sakura out shopping for some clothing supplies and other needs.”

He blinked only once in the silence between them. “…Who?”

“Oh, it was Haku.”

“No, who did Haku take out? I know who Haku is you dolt.”

“Sakura?” The younger boy’s fear didn’t fade, but Yagura watched as it faded into something more relaxed as Suigetsu smiled to himself and answering. “She’s Mei’s guest, but Kisame brought her back and she’s been here since. She’s really nice.”

“And I have no car because Haku took her shopping.” Yagura clicked his tongue against the roof of his mouth.

“Th-there are other cars you could use.”

“Not interested.”

Yagura went back to his room to sleep again for less than a day before coming back out again to seek out Zabuza and rope the older man into a patrol of the district they ran.

“He’s out with Ao in the Barren District,” Haku answered without looking up from his novel. The boy’s tone was light and faded, like it was air between them. “Should be back in a few hours.”

“What are they doing there?” Yagura asked in annoyance.

“Whatever Mei asks them. She said she told you she was looking into the movements in that district, didn’t you?” Haku looked up from his book for the first time and cocked his head at an angle to one side, eyes wide and innocent. “Or did she not fill you in on her plans because you were sleeping? I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have bothered you with the distraction.”

Haku was almost worse than Mei with the sass sometimes. Zabuza let the kid get away with too much, and it was Yagura’s friendship with the old man that kept Yagura from swiping out and backhanding he kid out of his seat. The mental image was pleasing and the idea of violence made his very bones shake and then settle.

But he didn’t slap Haku. He took his agitation back to bed and slept again, suspecting things would be better the next waking day.

He was standing in the kitchen, staring into a densely packed fridge with one glaring absence.

“Who took my cannoli?” he seethed, slamming the door and storming out with a heading set for Kisame. The man ate like a tank and was in the kitchen more than anyone else. He would knew better than Yagura who the thief would be.

Yagura found the blue giant in the map room, helping Mei assemble pins on the board attached with scrolls wrapped up tight around the pins. Both looked up when he stormed in, but neither shrank or flinched. Mei didn’t need to and Kisame was a powerhouse in his own right. Kisame was likely the only other one who could go toe to toe with Yagura and not suffer a horrible loss in the first twenty minutes of a fight.

“Who?” was all the shorter male ground out.

“What are you talking about now, dear?” Mei asked in a soft sort of voice best suited to mothers and lovers. Mei was neither to him and they both knew that. She was just his agitator.

“The kitchen. My cannoli.”

Kisame looked up. “Those weren’t yours. That was a run I made, and you were asleep and never asked for any.”

“There are always cannoli for me. Everyone else received their usual. Where is my cannoli, I can smell where it should have been.”

“Like I said, those weren’t for you. Sakura wanted to try one and she liked them, so I gave the rest to her,” Kisame admitted, ducking his head as he leaned over the table even further. Along the high ridges of his cheekbones and the shell of his ear his skin flushed a mellow shade of purple through his blue skin.

“Sakura?” he hissed the name.

“My guest,” Mei added. “Don’t be mean, she won’t like you.”

“I don’t like her, so that’s fine,” he snapped, feeling the static around his face charge. “When is she leaving?”

Kisame looked up suddenly and turned his eyes to Mei who rolled her lips against each other before leaning back away from the table and crossing her arms. Her eyes were on the flags, but she answered him in spite of her split attention.

“She may leave when she wishes. For as long as she has need of it, I will offer her shelter under my roof.”

“What is she contributing?”

Mei looked up sharply and her eyes were knives all on their own. “That is no business of yours. I will not speak on this matter further. You may run out yourself and buy any treat you wish, but leave me to my plans. I must meditate on this a while longer. Kisame? Grab me those cards.”

Mei’s attention slid off Yagura to the cards Kisame was handing her, blank except for a few names and addresses she was adding to the map. Just like before, he was so easily dismissed.

Fine.

That was… just fine.

He didn’t think he would, but the next day he heard the stranger ahead of him, stumbling about in the kitchen looking through the fridge. He stopped in the hall, finding himself at the crossroads of a choice. He had no plans that would take him into the kitchen, but the stranger they called Sakura was in there, and he had half a mind to scare her off before she ruined any more of his life.

Yes, it would be necessary to scare her a little.

He turned into the kitchen, feeling the agitation around his face as he rounded the corner and stopped with his feet firmly planted. Arms crossed he watched the shadow of her as she bend behind the door to the fridge and dug.

“What are you doing, you thief,” he hissed, voice deep and sharp, like a knife from below.

He saw her flinch and stumble backwards out from behind the door, still gripping its side. He could tell right away by the size and shape of her wrist she was small, thin, maybe malnourished, and less a threat to any odd room then he would ever be-even at his weakest.

He held onto his glare like a lifeline when she looked up at him, green eyes wide and glassy. She was a mess, a young, scared mess, and it took the fight out of him.

He growled, hating the feeling he sensed at her reveal. The source of his agitation was before him, but scaring her or intimidating her would do nothing but agitate him further.

She stepped out further and he noticed how she carried herself on unsteady legs, the unusual angle she moved at, and how thin her ankles were with bare feet and miles of bare legs. She was wearing a dress, but it was too small to consider appropriate for anything other than sleepwear.

With a small sort of horror he realized the hour was late and the sky was dark beyond the windows and that fancy white lace was exactly what he thought it was. He had caught her in her sleeping things like some sort of pervert.

Didn’t she know better?

He looked away, cheeks red up to his ears. “What are you doing here?”

“Food?”

Something curled up in his chest and he almost doubled over from the surprise of the feeling. Her voice was like a memory in his heart and he knew instantly that she was one of the mer folk known for their voices. There was no way she could be anything else. Additionally, Mei mentioned mermaid tail being sold again. No one told him, but he figured it all out.

“You need something to eat, then?” he grunted, voice less sharp and melting fast.

When she nodded he hated how it made her seem smaller than she already was, like she was shrinking away into nothingness. He took a step towards her.

“Then eat something. What are you looking for? There is plenty to choose from.” He came up behind her and glared over her shoulder into the fridge. “There are cookies and cake and frozen pasta. All excellent choices.”

“…No cannoli?”

“Ah, well, I guess you just have a more refined taste than the others. No, there is no cannoli. The only one who eats it is me.”

Sakura wilted at the confession, but nodded in agreement. “Oh. Okay.” She looked to the fridge and then over at Yagura. “Thanks anyway.”

“You’re not going to take something else?”

Sakura shrugged. “I-I’ve tried some other stuff, but it all made me sick so far. Mei said I would adjust in time.”

“So you can’t keep anything else down,” he mused, thinking how horrible that must be. No wonder she was so thin. She hadn’t been properly taken care of.

“Come on,” he said, leading her by the arm. “The bakery operated on a 24 seven schedule. Go change and meet me in the garage. I was heading out there on my own anyway, and I guess it wouldn’t be too much trouble if you tagged along. You wouldn’t be able to get them without me anyway at this hour.”

“Change into one of the new dresses? Will it be…long?”

“Not truly, at least not at this hour. Go, that’s not appropriate to be seen in. When you come out in the future you should wear a robe. Has no one told you how you could cover up or even why?”

Sakura hook her head before nodding once awkwardly and hopping off to change. She came back after several long minutes in a plain gray and blue pinstripe pattern. It was modest, neat, and somehow she made it look like the opposite of what it had been intended for; simple wearing. She clutched a small purse, too thin to hold much.

“You won’t need that,” he grumbled, turning and stalking into the garage with a backwards wave meant to encourage her to follow. “It’s unthinkable to accept the pennies of the poor. Save it.”

He stopped when he realized she wasn’t following. He turned, glower fresh.

“What is it?”

“You’re Yagura right?”

“Huh, what of it?”

Sakura dipped her head and the loose strands of coral pink slid over her shoulders. “Thank you. I’m Sakura.”

He didn’t fluster, but maybe Yagura did go a bit red in the face, embarassed to be thanked so directly.

“Whatever,” he muttered, turning his back to her and walking on. “You’ll need new clothes too. Next time we’ll replace those drab things Haku chose for you. Nothing even came with a hair ribbon. Really, they should be ashamed of their hospitality.”

She followed silently, but with a smile.

“What is that?”

“What does it look like?” he barked.

Mei frowned, looking down at the bag of hands, some still fresh with wet blood. “It looks like a mess. Where did they come from?”

“You won’t find anyone willing to cut up a mermaid tail for food any longer. “

#Yagura #YAGUSAKU #Dream Sweet in Sea Major #more of that fic #Mermaid Sakura

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