imagine the brooding, intimidating Batman fighting criminals in the street when he hears this special ringtone in the comms and they're for specific people: his grandkids.
he has to hide in the shadows and goes Grandpa mode, clears his throat and coos lovingly to the comms to talk them.
Nightwing: Oh, he's cooing again.
Red Hood: Lian must have called and asked for more fruit loops.
or
Spoiler: B's doing that baby voice again, it's kinda creepy.
Red Robin: My baby must have dialed, he likes his grandpa's voice.
The rest of the batkids: WHAT BABY?????
Superboy: Our baby.
the batkids curse in different languages, confused and shocked.
***
when some of the rogues or criminals hear Batman in his Grandpa mode, they think he's gone soft.
nope. he's more determined, more restless, more protective, so he won't stop unless they're in Akrham or in jail.
but it's worth it when he comes home to little kids, who are excited to see him.
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Bruce would have interesting ways to discipline his kids.
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Bruce: Listen to me, Damian! You can not steal my car and drive across country to visit Jon.
Damian: Then why do I know how to drive! And my mommy says I can! You don't own me!
Bruce: Young man, when you are under my roof you will follow my-
Damian: No I don't.
Bruce: If that's how it's gonna be. *Draws a circle around Damian* Stay there for five minutes.
Damian: D-d-d-daddy?
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Dick: *swinging from the chandelier that has been pass down in Bruce's family for generations* I'm gonna swing from the chan-
Bruce: Get down here this instant!
Dick: I'm not doing anything.
Bruce: Richard Grayson
Dick: You're not my dad!
Bruce: *brings out a bag of m&ms*
Dick: What are you doing? Those are mine?
Bruce: *opens it slowly*
Dick: Bruce?
Bruce:*eats one*
Dick: STOP, I'm coming down. Don't eat them!
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Jason: You can't make me. I'm not going to the party.
Bruce: *head vein throbbing* This is important. You can't skip this event.
Jason: *shrugs* You'll have to carry me.
Bruce: *takes a deep breath and walks away*
Jason: ahah, baby.
Bruce: *comes back with a bottle of castor oil and a spoon*
Jason: You sick sick man. Fine I'll go.
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Bruce: Tim you disappoint me.
Tim: I didn't think it would blow up the Batcave. Or make mustard gas. Or create a sinkhole.
Bruce: *sighs* I have no choice. You going on a nature retreat.
Tim: Bruce!
Bruce: Over two weekends. With the Boy Scouts.
Tim: *tears glisten in his eyes* Bruce...
Bruce: As a junior member.
Tim:
Bonus
Alfred: Right! That's it, Master Bruce. *Pours a spoon of castor oil8
Bruce:
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cursed construction core hi vis bra that came to me in a dream
In the dream I saw it in the window display of a hardware/DIY/trade shop, implying it was meant to be a practical garment designed for actual female constructions workers in a Female Armour level missed-the-brief attempt at gender inclusion
The practical support from the visible underwire combined with the hi vis implying it’s not meant to be worn as an undergarment, I just-
I blame my binge-reading ND Stevenson’s gender comics talking abt masculinity and femininity incl the one abt Victoria’s Secret lingerie yesterday for this monstrosity x’D
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Comments on Mumbo's hermitcraft videos over the years are so funny to look back on because it's like people have been watching a weird skittish creature slowly progress over time. Like in season 6 when he got involved in the civil war his comments were all like "Mumbo's getting involved in a server event?!? Can this be real?". And s7 with HCBBS and the hobbitventure with XB and Cleo it was " It's nice to see Mumbo hanging out with more hermits he tends to be in his own little world most of the time...", or in more recent seasons where he's gotten better at building and would say that he's bad at this and then go "no no I think I did good :{ " you can guarantee people are going to be cheering for him not being self-deprecating you go you funky mustache creature. I dunno, it's honestly pretty wholesome.
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