#just watched the new pod with my mom

[kingofmyborrowedheart]

Travis acknowledging that there are aspects of the relationship that are private and some that are more public but still being open to finding a balance between the two as it goes must be incredibly refreshing for Taylor seeings as she’s dealt with both very public and very private relationships in the recent past.

[imsuperhungry]

​🇫​​🇦​​🇮​​🇱​​🇺​​🇷​​🇪​

ʸᵒᵘ ˢᵃʸ "ᵗᵒᵒ ˡᵃᵗᵉ ᵗᵒ ˢᵗᵃʳᵗ, ᵍᵒᵗ ʸᵒᵘʳ ʰᵉᵃʳᵗ ⁱⁿ ᵃ ʰᵉᵃᵈˡᵒᶜᵏ" ᴵ ᵈᵒⁿ'ᵗ ᵇᵉˡⁱᵉᵛᵉ ᵃⁿʸ ᵒᶠ ⁱᵗ

⊹ ࣪ ﹏𓊝﹏𓂁﹏⊹ ࣪ ˖

001

"Yesss, work it, Daisuke!" you squeal, dissolving into giggles. Daisuke, draped in his older sister's shimmering prom dress, gleams under the soft glow of his bedroom light, the sequins catching every flicker like little stars in a galaxy. You insisted that, if he truly wanted to claim "baddie" status—his words, not yours—he had to accessorize with the pearl earrings and matching bracelets his sister had left behind. They were practically a requirement, after all.

He strutted across the room, attempting his best catwalk, striking poses like he was a Victoria's Secret Angel. This felt like his new identity, and not the loser 19 year old who begged you to play apex trios with him.

"My catwalk's flawless, huh?" he says, kicking one leg in front of the other with exaggerated flair, dramatically swaying his hips like someone fresh out of a questionable hip surgery rather than Shalom Harlow. As he struts toward the mirror, he pretends to wipe away an imaginary smudge of lipstick, then bites his lip and squints his eyes, critically evaluating his reflection like a true fashionista—or so he’d like to think.

"Hell yes," you reply, though hell no is what you really want to say. A soft, stifled giggle escapes you, lingering for a moment before you shake your head at his utterly ridiculous antics. With a small sigh, you turn your attention back to the glowing TV screen in front of you.

It played a Pokémon card unboxing video, something Daisuke had begged you to watch with him. He was such a geek about it—not that you could judge, considering you were just as bad. Maybe that shared nerdy enthusiasm was why the two of you had stayed inseparable ever since you were five.

You remember the day you met him like it was yesterday, a memory so sweet it still warms your heart. He walked past you in kindergarten, proudly wearing a Sonic shirt that immediately caught your eye. There was something magnetic about him—his pure, unassuming aura had a way of drawing people in, making them either wish to be him or to be near him. You remember the moment you saw it—you thought, oh, hell yeah. That Sonic shirt sealed the deal; you just *had* to be his friend.

You’d walked over to where he was sitting at lunch and complimented his shirt. His face lit up instantly, and he grinned wide, proudly showing off the gap where his left front tooth used to be. That grin of his had a way of making you feel a little less out of place in the chaotic, noisy cafeteria.

Without saying much, the two of you quietly ate lunch together, a comfortable silence settling between you. Occasionally, he’d share some of the chankonabe his mom had lovingly packed in his matching Sonic lunchbox, a gesture that felt like the beginning of something special. When lunch ended, you naturally gravitated toward each other, making your way to music class. That is, until chaos erupted behind you—a piercing scream announcing that some poor kid had just shit his pants and was now throwing a full-blown tantrum.

Well, maybe the memory wasn't that sweet after all. 

But look at you now! His mom knows everything about you—your name, your age, your birthday, your favorite color, and even the exact face you made that one time you accidentally ate a Tide Pod when you were six and left unsupervised in the kitchen. She'd probably recount that day with a laugh if she ever wanted to embarrass you, but instead, she just treated you like family, as if you’d always been a part of their world.

You'd spent so much time at his house that one Christmas, his parents surprised you with a bed in Daisuke's room. No more cramming yourself onto the couch when you stayed over. It had become your room too, in a way—a space where you felt just as at home as he did, where the lines between friendship and family blurred into something comfortable and familiar.

Speaking of parents, as Daisuke struck poses like the diva he was in front of the mirror, you half-watched a Pokémon card pull, trying to decide if it was worth your time. His mom walked in, practically glowing with excitement, her infectious enthusiasm filling the room. But that grin faded fast when she looked up from closing the door and saw her grown son standing there in a big, sparkly pink dress.

You couldn't help but cackle as Daisuke turned to face his mom upon hearing the door open. His expression was pure humiliation, like he had just been caught doing something way worse than wearing a sparkly pink dress. Meanwhile, his mom looked like she had just received the devastating news that her dreams of ever having grandchildren had been shattered. Her face froze in shock, and you could practically see her soul leave her body. For a brief moment, you almost felt bad for him—but that feeling vanished as soon as you saw the look on his face. 

"Mom... I swear, I just w—" Daisuke started, but his words were quickly cut off as his mom raised a hand, a silent plea for him to just stop. Her eyes closed for a moment, taking a deep breath as if she were preparing herself for something far worse than this.

For a few minutes, she stood there, her gaze fixed on the ground, as if she were trying to hold back tears. Daisuke shot you a glare, but you couldn’t help the silent chuckles escaping from you as you lay on his bed. The tension was thick in the air, and after what felt like an eternity, she finally let out a deep sigh. Slowly, she raised her head, her smile returning—but it was strained, the edges of her lips twitching as if it were taking all her strength to keep it in place.

"So, I remembered the conversation we had the other night, Daisuke," she began, her voice light and almost teasing now, as if the earlier tension had slipped away. "And I remember how you said you wanted to start making your own money." She paused, her eyes sparkling with excitement, a hint of pride in her expression. "Well, for the past few days, I've been looking, and guess what? I found you a job!"

Daisuke's face lit up instantly, his excitement bubbling over, though it was clear he hadn’t quite grasped the reality of the situation. His mind immediately jumped to the one thing he could already picture: finally buying all those skibidi toilet t-shirts he'd been eyeing for ages. He’d begged both of his parents for months, but neither of them had even bothered to humor him.

"You're going to space!" she exclaimed, her excitement practically bubbling over, as if she were announcing the most thrilling news in the world. But Daisuke's smile faltered almost immediately, his enthusiasm evaporating the second he processed her words. His mind struggled to grasp the meaning behind them, and his face twisted in confusion.

You couldn't help but snicker at his stunned expression. He looked like someone had just told him his favorite anime was being turned into a live-action film by the worst studio imaginable. There was still some humor in it, but it was the kind that felt wrong—like laughing at a joke that wasn’t funny anymore, but you couldn’t help yourself.

"...What?" was all he managed to say, his voice barely more than a whisper. He didn’t even acknowledge your laughter, too caught up in trying to process what his mom had just said. His mind was clearly short-circuiting, and you could practically see the gears grinding in his head as he tried to make sense of it.

"Yup!" she chirped, turning to you with a grin. "You too, honey! Your mom and I talked about it, and we thought this would be the best option for you!" Suddenly, all humor drained from your face, replaced by a growing sense of disbelief. 

"Yeah, it's not so funny now, is it?!" Daisuke teased, flashing a grin in your direction. You rolled your eyes, still trying to wrap your head around it. Okay, maybe it was *a little* funny—but only a little. The idea of spending three months in space, of all places, seemed absurd, and yet here you were, with no say in the matter.

"Well, your guys' shifts start next week, so get to packing! It's going to be three months, I think!" she said with a wink before shutting the door behind her. You and Daisuke just stared at each other in stunned silence for a moment, both of you processing the absurdity of it all. Then, Daisuke groaned, slumping against the wall with a heavy sigh. Three months in space... and neither of you had any idea how to feel about it yet.

[moamidzyism]

the seven stages of you and i (c.sb)

ʚ♡⃛ɞ when you first met soobin, you knew he was going to play a lead role in your life. you were going to make sure of it. you just didn't know what to expect. or: the story of a boy, a girl, and the turbulence that fills the space between them.

☆。.:*·ﾟwc 14444 angst + smut ౨ৎ minors DNI ˚⁺。˚ // repost ୨୧ soobin x fem!reader, best friends to lovers, childhood friends to lovers to ???, first time. featuring beomgyu, taehyun, kai from txt, yuna from itzy, and arin from oh my girl [masterlist • reblogs + feedback appreciated]

playlist

you can vividly remember the first time you ever saw soobin.

it was the summer before third grade started.

it had been an unbearably hot summer and with the school year looming just a month away, you were dreading going back to school and trying so hard to not think about having to meet your new teacher and make new friends.

so to take you mind off the soul crushing pressures of elementary school, you begged your mom to let you go to the park. she refused, claiming she had to work, but the two of you made a compromise and you settled for riding your bike around the cul-de-sac where she could still see you from the dining room table.

you had been riding for thirty minutes, quickly growing tired of the rays of the sun beating down on your skin. you were about to call it a day, but that’s when you saw it.

the gray honda civic driving past you, the sun reflecting on the hood of the car. the woman in the front seat, slowly waking up from her slumber. her husband tapping her shoulder excitedly, looking at his new home in awe.

and him.

the young boy staring out the window with wide eyes as the car pulled into the driveway of the house beside yours.

you darted inside to tell your mom you had new neighbors.

at dinner time, she took you over with some food. “hello, we live right next door.” she introduced herself to the woman that opened the door. “i just thought you guys could use a warm meal with moving and everything.” behind her legs, you could see the little boy peeking at you.

she invited you in and you remember the way their house looked so devoid of life. what was supposed to be the living room was a sea of boxes. your mother sat beside his mother on the old brown leather couch that sat in the back of the room.

you caught soobin’s gaze, watching you taking in the sight of his new home. he looked away when he noticed you looking at him. you moved to sit beside him on the floor.

“i saw you,” he said when he registered your presence beside him.

“what?” you were slightly taken aback.

“outside.” he clarified. “you were on your bike.”

“oh,” you muttered. “my name is y/n.” you reached out to shake his hand. he looked at you, a bit puzzled, yet mirrored the gesture, his grip gentle and feeble.

“i’m soobin.”

“how old are you?”

“i’m almost 10.” he answered, glancing down at his hands.

“why did you move here?”

“my dad got a job.”

“do you want to ride bikes tomorrow?”

“i don’t know how.” soobin looked at you, uncertainty flickering in his eyes, his shy demeanor even more pronounced.

“i can teach you.” you offered.

and the next morning, at 11 sharp, soobin showed up in front of your house ready to learn. after that afternoon, you decided that you liked him and he was going to be your best friend. he didn’t talk much but he always listened to you, with a goofy smile plastered on his face. when he did talk, he answered all your questions thoughtfully. and most importantly, even after he fell down multiple times, he still showed up at your house the next day, waiting to learn.

by the time you got to middle school, everyone knew that you were two peas in a pod. from the day you met, everywhere you went, soobin wasn’t far behind, following you like a lost puppy. you always carpooled together; you always ate lunch together; you were even in all the same clubs.

and so when eighth grade began, you two were separated for the first time in five years and it was so hard for you to adjust to not seeing him every second of every day.

the first morning of the school year, you stopped yourself from asking your mom where soobin was when he wasn’t at your car waiting for you. you wandered through the halls to your regular lunch table a little surprised and mostly disappointed when you didn’t see him sitting with an extra cookie he always got from the lunch lady. after school, you sat awkwardly, alone, on the bench outside of the school building waiting for your mom to pick you up.

when you got home, you didn’t even bother going up to your room. you threw your backpack on the couch and made a beeline for his house. you flopped onto his bed with a sigh as soon as you got to his room, the softness of the mattress cradling you. he didn’t look up from where he sat at his desk doing his homework, but he acknowledged your arrival with a quiet hello. 

“how was your first day of high school?” you asked, emphasizing the last part of your question.

“it was okay.” he scribbled something in his book.

“just okay?” you pressed.

“it was kind of weird.” he turned his chair around and finally looked up at you.

“did you miss me?”

“yeah, a little,” he confessed. a soft warmth bloomed in your chest, and you couldn’t help but smile to yourself.

“i think i might try out for the football team,” he blurted out of nowhere. “or maybe basketball? i don’t know yet.” you bursted out in laughter.

“did i say something funny?”

“you have no athletic bone in your body.” you countered, still chuckling.

“we don’t know that.”

“oh, we do,”

he moved to join you on the bed, books in hand, and you watched him with a fondness that didn’t need words as he made himself comfortable.

“i always tell you not to wear your outside clothes on my bed.” he jokingly admonished.

“do you like your school?”

“i mean, it’s only my first day. but it was okay.”

you paused, both to process what he just said and to figure out how to word what you really wanted to say. “i don’t want you to forget about me or stop hanging out with me or whatever.”

“you’re literally going to the same school next year.” he teased you.

“i know, but still.”

“you’re a hard person to forget about, y/n.”

“you’re just saying that,” you felt the blood rush up to your cheeks, and subsequently rushed to hide your face in his sheets.

“no, i mean, you literally wouldn’t let me forget about you.” he laughed and in response, you threw a pillow at him.

but in the back of your mind, you knew he was right – you couldn’t let him forget about you. and as the days rolled on, you made it a point to go over to his house for hours after school. at least for the first month and a half of the smeester. that was until the demands of school grew and he started having to stay after school for clubs and going over to people’s houses for projects. by the time the holidays rolled around, your moments together were reduced to the seconds you saw him in the mornings when you were both leaving for school. and for the most part, it stayed like that going into the summer.

the summer after eighth grade, you saw soobin a total of three times.

the first time you saw him was on memorial day. your dad, not exactly the biggest fan of your plan to stay home the entire summer, pushed you out of the house to go to his family’s barbecue. you went to soobin’s house with a tray of cookies (because you never go to someone’s house empty handed, your mom told you beforehand). he greeted you with a casual wave before disappearing upstairs to play video games with his friends. you lingered around his house for ten minutes, until you felt completely uncomfortable by yourself, when you slipped away back to your room, cocooning yourself in your bed, tears tracing paths down your cheeks, soaking into your sheets beneath you.

the second time was sometime right after the fourth of july. his dad was taking him on a fishing trip and you just so happened to be getting the mail as they were leaving. you tried to pretend not to see him, eyes fixed on the ground, your heart pounding. and you thought it worked. but later that day, a message lit up your phone screen – soobin confessing that he missed you. you deliberated for two hours before typing out a guarded response: “me too.” two weeks stretched out like an eternity before his next message came.

the third time was actually the day before your first day of high school when he came over to your house under orders from his mother. he stood at your bedroom door, a mixture of apprehension and determination etched across his face.

when you opened the door, all the feelings of abandonment came flooding through your mind – every time you cried thinking about how he was ignoring you, every time your parents had to force you to get out of the house and breathe in fresh air, everything came at once.

“what are you doing here?” you spat at him. your words were a shield, sharp and defensive.

“my mom said i should come check on you.” he responded, his hand absently massaging the back of his neck. you yielded, allowing him to enter the room, but he hesitated, lingering by the door, too afraid to sit down.

“are you nervous about high school?” he ventured.

you met his gaze, scanning his eyes for sincerity. “not really.”

“i’m sorry,” he admitted, his voice heavy with regret. “i’ve been pretty shitty to you this year.”

“yeah, you have been pretty shitty.”

“i meant it when i said i missed you.”

“i know.”

“are we good?”

he didn’t really apologize, you understood that. but sometimes, especially in that moment, it seems easier to forgive him than confront him about how horrible he made you feel. and so you concede, not realizing that you’re setting the precedent for you guys to saunter in and out of each other's lives as you please. “yeah, we are.”

you invite him to sit on the bed with you and he joins you.

“so, what is high school really like?” you ask, trying to clear the air of tension that lingered.

“well, it’s nothing like high school musical,” he began.

and although you were apprehensive about forgiving him so quickly, you couldn’t deny how good this felt. sitting here with him, not thinking about the future or the past. just being here talking about nothing and everything at the same time. if you could, you would have captured this moment and put it in a snow globe to look at everyday.

the next morning, you stood at the threshold of the school building, soobin towering beside you. as you walked into the school together, you couldn’t help but notice the subtle shift in the atmosphere. soobin seemed to be a lot more popular than he led on and he navigated the halls with a confidence that belied his usually reserved nature. students and teachers alike greeted him as you walked through the halls.

“okay, mr. superstar,” you teased.

“well, i am class president.” he tells you shyly.

“why didn’t i know this?” you wondered aloud. he offered you a nonchalant shrug but continued guiding you through the labyrinth of corridors that made up the school. 

as you approached your classroom, the reality of where you were dawned on you. you turned to soobin, seeking reassurance from him. “i’ll see you at lunch?”

“yeah,” he affirmed.

with a final smile, you slipped into the classroom, taking a seat beside a girl who was looking at you with wide eyes.

“you know soobin?” she blurted out when you sat down.

your brows furrowed in confusion. “yeah?” you answered, taken aback.

“how?”

“uh, he’s my friend.” you explained, scanning the room for an empty seat.

a spark of hope lit up her eyes. “can you introduce me to him?”

you hesitated, your discomfort growing with each passing second. “i don’t even know you.”

a wave of awkwardness washed over the both of you. without waiting for a response, you quickly gathered your things, seeking refuge in a different seat on the other side of the classroom. what the hell was that? you thought to yourself as the other students filed into the class.

save for that strange moment in the first period, the rest of your classes went by completely unremarkable until lunch time rolled around. you arrived at the cafeteria fifteen minutes after lunch started. you were trying to navigate the way between hundreds of bodies in the hallway and found yourself in a completely different wing of the school. why does a high school have to be this big? you asked yourself when you collided with a girl.

“are you okay?” you asked her.

“yeah, i’m just trying to find the cafeteria.” her response came with a note of relief.

“me too. i’m y/n.”

“i’m yuna and this school is way too big.” she remarked, a trace of exasperation lacing her words.

“yeah, i got a tour this morning and i’m still confused.”

should we ask someone for help?” yuna suggested.

“yeah,” together you venture into a nearby classroom to ask a teacher for help.

meanwhile, in the cafeteria, soobin took advantage of your little detour to offer a preemptive warning to his friends about how to act around the freshman girl that was going to be eating lunch with them.

“i’m serious, you guys, don’t be weird.”

“when have we ever been weird?” beomgyu asked, but his playful tone is punctuated by a stray fry launched by kai, which found its target on taehyun’s head.

soobin gave beomgyu a knowing look.

“we won’t be weird, okay?” his friend reassured him. “what’s with the girl anyways?”

“she’s my best friend and i don’t want you guys to scare her.”

you finally make it to the cafeteria with yuna by your side. soobin introduced you to his friends, and you briefly remember them from memorial day. as the lunch period dragged on, you sat quietly, observing soobin in his element. you never felt this way before, but watching the way he interacted with his friends made him a little more attractive in your eyes. there was a magnetism in his confidence and you couldn’t help but entertain thoughts that had never crossed your mind before.

and from them, you found yourself yearning for those stolen glances, fingers brushing in passing and shared laughter that lingered just a little longer than usual.

being best friends with someone older than you had its perks, especially when that person was as smart as soobin. you were pretty good at biology freshman year, and chemistry was okay too. but no one warned you that knowing the powerhouse of the cell or all the symbols of the periodic table was enough to equip you for an honors physics class.

even though you stayed up for three nights in a row, you didn’t expect to do so bad on the unit test. it was embarrassingly bad. like bringing the class average down bad. like being handed back a folded test bad. you opened your test packet hesitantly, only to quickly close it again upon seeing the harsh, red “36/100” glaring back at you. the room seemed to close in around you, the disappointment heavy in the air.

after class, you went to meet your teacher. “are you sure there’s no way i could get some extra credit or something?” you asked, your voice carrying a mix of desperation and determination.

“y/n,” he said, his tone firm. “if i give you extra credit, i have to give everyone extra credit,” he advised. “if you want a better grade, i suggest you study harder.”

“fucking asshole,” you mutter under your breath as you left the classroom. the slam of the door echoed down the empty hallway.

yuna, who was waiting for you outside your class, scowled when she saw your demeanor. “what’s wrong?”

“he’s such an asshole.”

“what did he do this time?”

you handed her your test and slung your backpack onto your shoulder in frustration. her face scrunched up when she saw the red ink that scattered the page. she reached out to gently caress your hair in a soothing gesture. “oh, honey…”

“and he wouldn’t let me do extra credit.”

“didn’t your boyfriend take this class last year?” yuna asked, trying to find a solution.

“boyfriend?” you replied. you knew where she was going with this, but you wanted to see if she would actually say it. but you knew she was never one to back down. “soobin?” she asks.

“not my boyfriend.” you remind her in a singsong voice, causing her to roll her eyes.

“well, i’m pretty sure he took this class last year. just ask him to tutor you.”

you hum, pulling out your phone to text him.

to soob: i hate to ask you this but i really need your help

from soob: you know i’m always gonna help you what do you need

to soob: one quiz away from failing physics can my bestest friend in the whole entire world help me

from soob: you know you don’t need to butter me up but i’ll take it

to soob: you know i love you so much right? can you come over tonight?

that evening, you meticulously laid out your physics notes and textbook on the kitchen island. you were stressing a lot, and in an attempt to calm your racing thoughts, you decided to bake. the sounds of the mixer and the clinking of the measuring cups was always something that soothed your anxious thoughts.

as the timer chimed, you pulled the tray of cookies out from the oven. just as you set them on the cooling rack, the doorbell rang, sending a jolt of nervous anticipation back through you.

you open the door to soobin.

“thank you again for doing this,” you said as you welcomed him inside. you guided him to the island. “i made cookies, so please feel free to take some.”

his eyes brightened with surprise. “you made cookies? i didn’t know you could bake.”

“i started in middle school,” you confessed, a hint of vulnerability crept into your voice. “my therapist said it was a good way to process my emotions. i don’t know.”

“you’re in therapy?”

“yeah, since middle school.”

“oh.”

the atmosphere in the kitchen shifted. you both settle into your seats. the tutoring session began, but despite your best efforts, you found it hard to focus. the equations and diagrams that soobin so easily drew out seemed to blur together and your mind drifted elsewhere. the only thing you could concentrate on was soobin’s long, veiny hands as they gracefully navigated the pages of the physics textbook in front of you.

“should we take a break?” his voice pulled you out of your thoughts.

you blinked, realizing that you had been staring at the same problem for a little too long. “i’m sorry. long day.”

“no, don’t apologize,” soobin reassured you. “it’s getting late anyways. we can always try again tomorrow.”

the next few tutoring sessions followed a similar pattern, but today you managed to gather yourself and focus, determined not to get lost in the small smile that graced soobin’s face whenever you correctly answered a question.

“you know what you’re doing?”

“what?”

“you know what you’re doing. just don’t overthink it.” he was referring to the problem set in front of you.

“oh, yeah,” you replied, your hand moving swiftly across the paper. in your mind, even if you got the question wrong, he would patiently explain it to you. this way, you wouldn’t be trapped in your head, thinking about how close he was to you, close enough to pick up hints of his shampoo, or how pretty his eyes looked with the kitchen lights dancing in them, or how soft his hands felt as they brushed against yours when he took the paper from you.

to your surprise, you managed to avoid any embarrassment for the rest of the session.

“when’s your next test?”

“in two weeks, i think,”

“we can meet a couple of nights a week until then,” he suggested.

as time passed, you found it easier to concentrate, the initial nervousness giving away to a growing confidence. you had to admit. soobin was a good tutor and with each passing day, you felt the weight of the test lessen, until the day of the test.

from soob: test day! how are you feeling?

to soob: i think i’m going to throw up

from soob: please don’t you’re going to do great you know i’m always rooting for you!!

you walked into the classroom with your chin held high, determined to “fake it till you make it” your way into a passing grade, but you spent the rest of the week after that a bundle of restlessness and anticipation.

finally, the day you dreaded the most arrived. the door swung open, and your teacher strode in, a stack of papers clutched in his hand. you held your breath, fingers crossed under the desk as he made his way down the rows, inching closer and closer.

“good job,” he smiled at you when he handed you your test.

after class, you practically sprinted to soobin’s locker, eager to share the news.

“check me out! i’m a nerd like you,” you exclaimed, thrusting the test paper towards him.

“har har,” he let out an amused snort, rolling his eyes. “i knew you could do it. maybe next time we can shoot for a 100?”

“i think we should focus on maintaining this 80%,” you chuckled. “i think this calls for a celebration. can you come over tonight?”

that evening, you and soobin set out to tackle the challenge of baking brownies. he was good at a lot of things but admittedly was very useless in the kitchen.

“it’s fine.” you reassured him, “i can teach you.”

“you’re always teaching me things,” he noted, his ears burning as he looked down at the mixing bowl.

“what are you talking about? i’m literally now passing physics because of you.

“not school things,” he explains. “i mean like practical life things. you taught me how to ride a bike; you taught me how to make friends––”

“i taught you how to make friends?”

“yes, you did. being friends with you just made me outgoing, i guess.”

“hmm.”

“anyways, you’re teaching me how to bake, although i think this might be a lost cause,” he quipped, eyeing the ingredients skeptically.

“just crack those eggs,” you instructed.

while you dealt with other things, soobin stood expertly mixing the batter. “can i taste it?” you asked, holding up a spoon.

“wait, this is so good,” you marveled at your own recipe.

soobin’s gaze met yours, a hint of a smile playing on his lips. he edged closer to you. “you have something…” he said softly, swiping your chin with his thumb, then tasting the chocolate batter from his finger.

“oh, uh, th-thanks,” you stammered, turning toward the sink to hide the elated grin that threatened to give you away. inside, you were almost bursting at the seams.

“so, cookies are for nerves, brownies are for celebration?” soobin asked, as you two settled onto the plush couch.

“and cakes are for when i’m sad,” you quipped, fingers deftly flicking the remote to life. “what do you want to watch?”

“i don’t care. whatever you want.”

wrapped in the cocoon of the soft blanket, you both sank into the cushions, the movie’s glow flickering across your faces.

as the credits rolled on the screen, you and soobin sat up, still close, but the proximity was charged with an unspoken confession.

“did you like the movie?” you asked, attempting to dispel the atmosphere.

“we’ve seen it like a million times,”

“yeah, but still.” you press and he just shrugs.

after a pregnant pause, he finally broke the stillness. “i feel like i need to tell you something.”

your heart quickened, a whirlwind of emotions swirling within. “yeah?”

“i, uh,” his voice wavered for a moment. “i like you,” he admitted, his words stumbling out in a rush, eyes fixed on a point somewhere in the middle distance.

“what?”

“i like you,” he repeated, softer and steadier this time. soobin’s heart raced, his pulse thrumming in his ears as he awaited your response. you, on the other hand, were filled with surprise and something else, you couldn’t even decipher. your breath caught. it was like the air had grown heavier, charged with unspoken desires and uncharted territory.

“oh.” you managed to let out. “that’s… oh.”

his gaze flickered back to his hands, usually so steady, that laid, slightly trembling in his lap. “it’s fine if you don’t feel the same. i’ve just been dealing with these feelings for a while and i just needed to tell you.”

“soobin, it’s—”

“you don’t have to say anything; i get it.” he interjected, “just forget about this. i value our friendship a lot more, so i don’t want things to be awkward between us.”

“soobin!” you exclaimed your voice firm and determined. “i like you too, but we… we can’t do this.”

“why not?”

“well, for starters, you’re graduating in the spring.”

“and i’m probably going to school, like what? two hours away?”

“i don’t want you to feel like you’re missing out on your college experience by being with me or whatever.”

“y/n, you’re literally my best friend.”

“precisely why we shouldn’t risk it,” you insisted. “i cherish our friendship, and i don't want to jeopardize it.”

“i promise you there’s absolutely nothing that could ever make us not be friends.”

“i don’t… i don’t know.”

“sleep on it, okay?” he conceded, rising from the couch. “i should probably go home.”

you escorted him to the door, the gravity of the moment still lingering. “see you tomorrow?” he asked, framed in the doorway. the threshold seemed both a physical and emotional boundary, like a bridge between the familiar present and the uncertain future of your relationship.

“yeah.”

he leaned forward, a gentle breath of warmth preceding the tender press of his lips against your cheek. “goodnight, y/n,” he murmured before fading into the night. 

your fingers lightly brushed your cheek, still tingling from where his lips had been. the sensation was still tingling, like a spark of electricity had been left behind. climbing the stairs you couldn’t help but grin from ear to ear. you felt like you were floating as you made your way to your room, crashing on your bed, kicking your feet thinking about the fact that he likes you.

the next day, you decided to skip lunch in the cafeteria. “please can you tell me why we’re eating lunch in the library today?” yuna asks, tossing her backpack onto a beanbag in the corner of the library where you settled.

“something happened last night.”

“did you and soobin finally kiss?” she asked, a sly grin creeping onto her face. you look up at her, trying to suppress your smile.

“well, not really.”

“not really? what happened?”

“he told me he liked me.”

yuna let out an excited squeal, earning disapproving glances from the other students.

“and he kissed my cheek.”

“shut up!” she was practically bouncing in her seat, unable to maintain her excitement.

“yeah, you should shut up.” some guy at a nearby table griped, annoyed by the disruption.

she rolled her eyes, returning her attention to you. “anyways, i’m so happy for you.”

“don’t get your hopes up.”

“oh, no.”

“yuna, he’s graduating soon.”

“okay? i don’t see what the problem is. you’ve had a crush on him forever and he was the one who said it first.”

“i just don’t want to do a long distance thing.”

“he lives right beside you.”

“and he’s moving away in seven months.”

“he’s moving to a different town, not a different country.”

“hey, you guys are making a lot of noise,” the library assistant reprimanded, approaching your table. “and you know you’re not allowed to eat in here.” she referred to yuna’s food.

“sorry,” you apologized, your voice meek.

she walked away, leaving you both to your conversation.

“yeah, ‘cause my carrots are going to crumb all over the books,” yuna quipped, but she complied, tucking away her lunch.

“i just don’t want to lose my best friend.”

with a multitude of thoughts swirling around your head, you knew you needed to talk to soobin. after school, you made your way to his house. as you walked to his bedroom, each step was weighed down by the uncertainty and anticipation that filled your heart.

the soft knock on soobin’s door pulled him from his thoughts. he swung the door open to find you standing there.

“hey,” you greeted, your voice above a whisper.

“hey,” he stepped back, allowing you in. his heart raced, a mix of hope and fear coursing through him.

you walked into his room taking in the decor. it hadn’t changed much from middle school. his walls were adorned with a mix of posters. a bookshelf stood against one of the walls, filled with a well-organized collection of novels, textbooks, and mementos. his desk, which sat by the window, was decorated with photos of the two of you from elementary school that you surprisingly hadn’t seen before. looking at them gave you the motivation to have the say everything that you wanted to say.

he gestured to his bed. you settled into your usual spots, the silence stretching, punctuated only by the soft sounds of the clock. soobin couldn’t help but steal glances at you, the room charged with tension.

“so, we should talk about last night.” you took a deep breath. he turned to face you, his gaze steady, waiting for your words. “i’ve been thinking a lot,” you continued. “and i do want to give this, us, a try.”

a smile broke across his face and you couldn’t help but melt. “you have no idea how happy that makes me.”

you mirrored his smile, a sense of contentment settling in your chest. “but,” you added, your expression turning more serious, “you are graduating soon, so we need to be realistic.”

he nodded. “we can face it together, one step at a time.”

you reach out, your fingers finding his. “okay,”

“can i kiss you now?”

“yes,” you giggled.

he cupped your face, slowly closing the space between you. meanwhile, your hands snaked their way to the back of his neck, pulling him down so his soft lips met yours. the world seemed to fade away, leaving only the sensation of his lips against yours.

the first touch was as light as a feather, but as a surge of emotion overcame the initial hesitation, the kiss deepened. time seemed to stand still and the moment stretched into infinity until you heard a cough coming from the door.

you quickly pull away from the kiss, your heart racing. soobin’s eyes held affection, his fingers still lightly grazing your cheek. you looked to the door to see his mom with her hands on her hips, a playful smirk on her face. “i was just checking to see if you were going to stay for dinner, y/n.” she said, her voice carrying a hint of amusement.

looking down at your hands, that sat in soobin’s hands, you responded quietly. “yeah, i’ll just text my parents.”

“okay,” she left the room with a knowing smile

“that was so,” you squealed in embarrassment, burying your face in soobin’s shoulder. his warmth enveloped you like a comforting embrace as his fingers gently traced patterns on your back.

“at least she likes you,” he joked, making you groan. “we should go downstairs,” he suggests, pulling away reluctantly.

as you proceed to stand up, he playfully tugged you back down, his eyes never leaving yours. “wait.” his voice held a soft urgency, his gaze locked onto your lips. “just one more.” he leaned in, the touch of his lips against yours sending a surge of warmth through your veins. his smile melted into the kiss.

“okay, we can go now.”

you followed him downstairs and avoided his mom’s knowing glances throughout dinner.

for the next few months, you spent almost every day with soobin. the two of you were once again attached at the hip, savoring every moment leading up to his impending graduation.

and the dreaded day of the ceremony arrived. soobin, loose tie in hand, entered his parents’ room with a furrowed brow. “mom, where’s dad?”

“he had to stop by the office, but he’ll meet us there,” she responded, finishing up her makeup. as she finished she turned to her son, her eyes sparkling. “oh my god,” she cooed. “you look so handsome.” she pulled him into a hug.

“god, mom, relax.” soobin chuckled, gently extricating himself from her affectionate grip. he smoothed out the wrinkles on his shirt.

“is it a crime for a mother to be proud of her son for graduating?”

“no, but i need help with the tie.” he gave it to her.

she took the tie, fingers deftly weaving it into place around her neck. “is y/n coming with us?”

“no, she’s going with her parents.”

“you know, i’m really glad you have her in your life.” there was a tenderness in her voice, her eyes fixed on her son as she put the tie around his neck, adjusting his collar.

“that’s random.”

“it’s not random. i’m just saying you’re graduating and going to college soon, and i just don’t want you to take her for granted.”

“i won’t. i promise.”

“ok,” she declared, a smile gracing her lips, indicating that she had finished. “good to go, we’re leaving in ten minutes so go finish getting ready.”

you arrive at your school’s auditorium thirty minutes before the ceremony began. you quickly settle beside soobin’s mother.

“i’m so glad you guys could make it,” she greeted warmly.

you scanned the hall, searching for your boyfriend in the sea of cap and gowns. the familiar hum of your phone in your lap brought your attention back to the present. it was a text from soobin, asking you to meet him outside the auditorium.

“is my dad there?” soobin’s voice held a note of urgency when he saw you.

“not yet, but your mom said he’s on his way. are you okay?” your hand rested comfortingly on his shoulder, trying to steady his nerves.

“i’m just nervous about the speech and the fact that he isn’t here yet.”

“well, he’s going to be here. who would miss their only child’s graduation?” you offered a reassuring smile, attempting to lighten the mood. “and the speech is going to go perfectly, okay?”

“you don’t know that.”

“yes, i do! you’ve been practicing all week. you’re going to do great.”

“what if i mess up?”

“if you mess up, just find me in the crowd, okay? i’ll be with both your parents and my parents, and we’ll all be cheering on you.”

“alright, thank you.” he took a deep, steadying breath.

you reached up, planting a tender kiss on his lips. “you’re going to do great,” you affirmed, and with that, he headed through the student entrance into the auditorium.

the ceremony flowed seamlessly. pride swelled in you as you watched soobin take the stage. his dad slid into your row just as he went on stage, and you offered him a thumbs-up, met in kind.

you returned to soobin’s house with your parents for the celebration. the living room was adorned with congratulatory banners and balloons, the most bright and colorful you’d ever seen his house.

for most of the party, you didn’t see much of him as he was passed around by friends and relatives that wanted to congratulate him. but eventually, at some point in the night he finds you and the two of you escape from the party to embrace the quiet of his room. the room was dimly lit, and mostly quiet, save for the chatter and the music softly playing from outside the door.

“god, i really needed this,” he confessed, stretching out on his bed. you nestled beside him, resting your head on his chest. he enveloped you in arms, fingers entwined with yours. “talking to people is exhausting,” he sighed.

“you were amazing today,” you reassured him.

“because i had you there with me.”

“and your dad came.”

“yeah, half an hour late. i can’t believe he went to work today.”

“at least he was there.”

“i don’t even care anymore. i’m just happy you were there and that we’re here together right now. i can’t wait for this summer.”

“i need to tell you something.”

“yeah,” he turned to you, fingers gently playing with yours.

“you know how i’m vice president of culinary club?” he hummed in acknowledgement.

“well, our faculty advisor told me about this culinary school that she thinks i should apply to for college.” you explained. “anyways she thinks i need to get a job or internship or something this summer to make my application stronger.”

“yeah,” his voice took on a more tentative tone.

“well, she connected me with one of her friends who owns a restaurant downtown and he said that i could, like, shadow him for the summer.”

“that’s great but–”

“i know. i don’t think it’s going to stop us from spending time together. we’ll still be able to do everything that we planned on doing. it’s just not going to be everyday.”

“baby, you don’t have to explain yourself to me.”

“i just feel bad.” your voice softened.

“why?”

“we had so many plans.” you pouted

“and we’ll still be able to do them,” he assured you. “i think it might be good practice for us when i go to school in the fall.”

“yeah, you’re right.”

you leaned up to kiss him, and he kissed you back.

the two of you lingered on his bed, the world beyond the room fading into insignificance. then, a gentle rap on the door pulled you out of your trivial conversations. 

“soobin,” his dad entered the room, voice cutting through the hush. “some of your guests are leaving. go downstairs to say goodbye.”

soobin shot up from the bed. “yeah, i’ll head down now.”

“y/n can i talk to you?” his dad asked. soobin looked back at you before leaving the room.

“yeah, what’s wrong?”

“nothing’s wrong. i just wanted to talk to you about soobin.”

“what about soobin?”

“why don’t you sit down,” he suggested. you complied, perching on your boyfriend's bed. “i wanted to talk about soobin because well he’s going to college in the fall and i just want to make sure that he’s not wasting his experience or losing his focus.”

you weren’t sure how to respond. “i’m don’t know–”

“see y/n, you’re a great girl and you’ve been there for soobin for a long time, but you also distract him.”

“what?”

“i work really hard to make sure that my family can live in this neighborhood and so that my only son can go to a good school. i don’t want to see him waste his life over his high school girlfriend.”

your chest tightened, emotions surging. you wanted to speak up, to yell at him and tell him off for inserting himself into your relationship. you wanted to yell at him for even saying this to you when he couldn’t be bothered to show up for his only son’s high school graduation. you wanted to defend your love and your commitment to soobin. but as the tears welled up in your eyes, the words caught in your throat. all you could manage was a quiet, “okay.”

“i’m glad you understand. i know we both care about him and we both want the best for him.”

he exits the room, leaving you alone with your thoughts and your tears. the last words he spoke echoed in your mind. we both want what’s best for him.

you gathered enough composure and strength, wiping away your tears, and made your way downstairs. you attempted to slip away quietly, but soobin caught you at the door.

“you’re leaving?” the dim light from the porch illuminated his face, casting soft shadows across his features.

“yeah, it’s getting late.”

“are you okay?” he noticed the tremor in your voice.

“yeah, i’m just super tired.”

“oh, okay? what did my dad want to talk to you about?”

“oh, he just asked me to send him the videos and photos i took of you earlier.” the lie tasted bitter on your tongue, but you pushed it out regardless, hoping to shield soobin from the weight of his father’s words.

“are you sure you’re okay?” he asked, taking hold of your hands. “do you want me to walk you home?”

“no, yeah, i’m fine.” you pull him into a hug for what felt like an eternity. if he noticed anything wrong with you after that, he didn’t bring it up. “i’ll see you tomorrow.”

that night, you couldn’t fall asleep. the room seemed to close in around you suffocating in its emptiness. the echoes of the conversation with soobin’s father reverberated in your mind, haunting you.

you grappled with the weight of your fears and insecurities. what if he was right? what if you were holding soobin back? distracting him? the thought had always lingered at the back of your mind since you began dating. and now that he was actually starting at college, that unspoken fear threatened to consume you.

maybe his dad was right. you needed to give him the space that he needed to grow. and it’s not like you had to break up with him. you just needed to keep him at an arm’s length and this summer was a chance for you to learn how to do that with you working. so in the weeks that followed, you found yourself pulling away and creating that distance. the space between you stretched as you took more shifts at work and spent less time with your boyfriend.

“i might move into school a week early,” soobin told you one day when you were hanging out in your room.

you felt your heart sink.

you hadn’t spent that much time together and now you had even less time together. it felt like a cruel twist of fate. still, you masked your disappointment with forced encouragement. “that’s good.” you muttered. “get to know the area better.”

“you think i should go?”

“i mean, if you want to. it seems like a good idea.”

“okay,”

as the day arrived for soobin to leave for school, you felt a void open up within you. the weight of missed moments and unspoken words crushed your soul, suffocating in their intensity. you called out of work but stayed in bed all day, cocooned in the covers, crying about the fact that you couldn’t allow yourself to savor the little time you had with soobin.

when soobin facetimed you later that evening, your heart both leapt and sank at the sight of his face. “hey, let me see your face.”

“i look horrible,” you groaned, but still revealed your face that was covered by your blankets and pillows.

soobin’s brows furrowed when he saw your face with your eyes red and your nose puffy. “have you been crying?”

“no, i’m just sick.” you tried to hide it, to mask the pain, but the cracks in your facade were all too evident.

“please, y/n, don’t lie to me.”

the raw vulnerability in his voice cracked something open within you. “i just miss you and i wish I could have helped you move in.”

“maybe i can come home on the weekend after classes start?” you wanted to revel in the possibility of seeing him again so soon, however the question lingered heavy in the air.

“do you think i’m holding you back from getting the full college experience?”

“where did that come from?”

“what if there’s like… i don’t know, a really cool frat party that weekend? would you miss out on that for me?”

“i think i’d rather see my girlfriend than go to some hypothetical frat party.”

“i’m being serious.”

“do you not want me to come home?” his question hung in the air, like a delicate thread of vulnerability. the room seemed to pulse with unspoken tension. your fingers tightened around the edges of your blanket, grasping for comfort and grounding, as you thought over your answer. every second of the silence felt like a weight on your shoulders.

you sighed. “i do, but–”

“then what’s the problem, y/n?” soobin’s voice, slightly raised, tinged with frustration, cut through the hush. “it seems like ever since the summer started you’ve been pushing me away, and i don’t know if i did something wrong.”

“you didn’t do anything wrong.”

“so what’s up?”

“i just don’t want you to feel like you’re wasting your time focusing on your high school girlfriend when you have so much life ahead of you.”

“you’re not just my high school girlfriend.” his voice softened.

“that’s not what i meant.”

“you’re also my best friend. and i don’t ever feel like i’m wasting my time by being with you.”

you contemplate telling him what his dad said, but you ultimately decide against it.

“what are you thinking?” he asked after you didn't respond for a while.

“i don’t know.” you confessed, your voice barely louder than a whisper.

“i need you to be honest with me because i don’t know what you need or how much more i can reassure you that you’re it for me.”

“maybe we should take a break?” the words slipped out before you could stop them.

“what?” soobin’s eyes widened, disbelief and hurt dancing in their depths.

“just maybe for the semester.” you rushed to explain, “so you can get your footing in school and i can focus on college apps.”

“so, you want to break up?”

“not like a real breakup. we’ll still talk and everything, just with some space.” he looked away, his jaw clenched, like he was processing the idea.

“i can’t believe you’re suggesting this.” his voice cracks as he blinks back the tears welling up in his eyes.

“maybe it’s what we need right now. we’ll still talk.” you promised, mostly trying to convince yourself.

the call ended and the weight of your decision settled on your chest, like a heavy ache that echoed the emptiness you felt inside. in your head, you were making the right choice for both of you, but that didn’t make it any easier. and as hard as you tried to maintain your relationship with soobin, over the next few months, the calls and messages became less frequent. the space between you was growing wider and each interaction held a bittersweet tinge, a mix of familiarity and the painful reminder of what once was.

the next break from school came quicker than you had expected. you sat at your desk, catching up on homework as the late morning sun streamed through the window, casting a warm glow across the room. the creak of your bedroom door announced your dad’s presence.

“how are you doing?” he asked, his voice tinged with concern.

a faint smile danced on your lips as you turned to face him. “i’m not going to kill myself dad,” you joked, trying to lighten the mood. “i’m just doing homework.”

“you’ve been in your room all break. i think i’m allowed to be worried.”

you bristled, the walls rising around you like a fortress. “well you shouldn’t be, okay? i’m fine.”

“okay so you don’t care to know that i saw soobin’s car pull up into the driveway?” he asked. you let out a soft, almost imperceptible sigh, your gaze shifted to the patch of sunlight dancing on the floor.

“are you going to see him?” he gently suggested.

“i don’t know if he wants to see me,” you admitted, your voice a hesitant whisper. the weight of uncertainty settled around you, and your dad’s brow furrowed in empathy. he approached you to comfort you. “i think i messed up,” you confessed, the words tasting bitter on your tongue.

he paused to study your face, and then he spoke, his tone filled with reassurance. “i’m sure whatever you did isn’t that bad. who could ever not want to see you?”

a small smile tugged at the corner of your lips, grateful for his attempt to ease your worries. “you’re just saying that because you’re my dad.”

he reached out, placing a reassuring hand on your shoulder. “you know that’s not true. and you know he wants to see you because he cares for you, and he knows you care for him too.”

“and what if that’s not enough?”

his gaze softened, “then you shouldn’t base your worth on what some guys thinks of you.”

“some guy? i thought you liked soobin.”

“yeah, but i like you more.” he pulled you into a warm embrace, the strength of his love wrapping around you like a shield. as he left the room, a sense of comfort lingered in the air. you sat there, the moment stretching, the decision before you felt like a bridge to cross, but you chose to not let fear dictate your actions.

with a determined exhale, you reached for your phone.

to soob: hey, i saw you just got home. whenever you get a chance, can you come over? i think we need to talk.

later that night, in the quiet stillness of your room, you receive a knock on your door. your heart quickened. you leaped out of bed, ready to face whatever awaited for you on the other side of the door. 

“hey,” you breathed, the door swinging open to reveal soobin.

“hi,”

“please come in,” you invited him in. you held the door open, allowing him to step into your sanctuary. “how have you been?”

“good,” he replied, though there was a subtle hesitance in his tone.

“really?”

he left out a soft chuckle, a nervous habit that betrayed the calm facade he tried to maintain. “well, no, but i thought it was the appropriate thing to say.” his hand moved to rub the back of his neck. “how are you?”

“been better,” you confessed.

he settled onto the edge of your bed, and you joined him.

“so you wanted to talk?”

“i’m sorry,” the words tumbled from your lips.

“for?”

“everything?” the raw honesty of the moment threatened to engulf you. “asking for a break, not talking to you. i messed everything up.”

“you didn’t mess anything up,” he countered.

“but look at where we are,” you murmured, your gaze falling to the floor, unable to bear the weight of the truth in his eyes.

“and where is that?”

“here.” you took a deep breath and looked into his eyes. “i just want us to be good like before,” you said after a long pause.

soobin’s expression softened, “me too. i’ve missed you.”

“like crying and throwing up every night?” you teased.

“eh, something like that,” a hint of a smile played on his lips, the lamplight catching the warmth in his eyes.

“good to know,” you replied, a smile tugging at your own lips.

“i’ve said this before, but you’re really it for me.” 

“is that so?”

“yeah, even though your dad was giving me a stank as i was coming upstairs.”

“he was?”

“yeah, and i thought your parents loved me.”

“they do!”

“that doesn’t sound convincing,” he joked, a genuine laugh filling the room, echoing off the walls.

“they do, they do.” you try to convince him. “they’re just really protective.”

“well, how can i get in their good graces again?”

“maybe by kissing me.” you suggest, teasingly.

“you think kissing their daughter is going to make them not hate me?”

“yeah, i think it might be a start.” you replied, your voice soft, but sure.

“okay.” 

he cups your face, pulling you into a tender kiss. as your lips met his, a surge of warmth spread through you, grounding you in the present moment. your hands found their rightful place on the back of his neck, fingers intertwining with the soft strands of his hair. in that fleeting, stolen breath of moment, the world outside seemed to dissolve, leaving just the two of you suspended in this fragile, but powerful connection.

when you finally pulled away, the room took a breath with you. in that moment, everything felt right again. you were back to your version of normal, and it was perfect.

soobin sat cross legend on your bed waiting for you to bring up some snacks. it was the first weekend of your spring break and he decided to come down to surprise you. while waiting for you, his gaze fell upon a large envelope on your bedside table, its seal embossed with the emblem of the culinary school that you had told him about.

“okay, this is a new recipe that i’ve been working on.” you announce, walking into the room with a plate of cookies in your hand. “i want you to be honest with me. that being said, if you hate it, i’m going to cry.”

“why didn’t you tell me that you got in?” he asked as he inspected the envelope.

“because i’m not going.” you set the plate on your bed.

“why not?” concern was etched into the lines of his face.

“for starters,” your gaze drifted to the windows. “i got more money from other schools. besides, it’s on the other side of the country.”

“so?”

“so, that’s too far.”

“but you knew where it was when you applied,” he pressed. “and it’s your dream school.”

“that doesn’t matter, soobin.”

“well, why not?”

“because, you’re here.” you admitted.

“so, you’re staying for me?”

“you don’t want me to?”

“no,”

“oh,”

“y/n,” he leaned forward, reaching out to touch your hand. “i don’t want you to give up on your dreams because of me.” his thumb was tracing patterns on your hand. “why is it so easy for you to understand when it comes to me but not when it comes to you?”

“i’m not giving up on my dreams,” you argued, your eyes meeting the boy on your bed with determination. “i just want to be with you right now.”

his fingers tightened around yours, trying to grasp the gravity of your decision. “we can still be together.”

“with 2000 miles between us?” you questioned. “we could barely handle a hundred. we’re finally good again. i don’t want to go to school across the country and have that change.”

“nothing’s going to change.”

“you don’t know that.”

“you’re right, i don’t know that.” he began, “but i do know that we literally broke up six months ago, and now i’m sitting on your bed again.”

“it wasn’t a break up; it was a break,” you interjected, a small smile playing on your lips.

“okay,” he dragged out the last syllable. “but my point still stands. we’ve been through a lot and we always end up right beside each other.”

you get your laptop from your desk and log into the admissions portal. “are you going to accept it now?”

“no time like the present.”

five months later, you found yourself getting in a taxi to your dorm with your parents by your side. they insisted on driving you there, but you managed to convince them that a cross country road trip would cause more harm than good to your familial relationship.

as you settled into the backseat of the cab, the familiar scent of your mother’s perfume enveloped you. the engine hummed softly beneath you, and the rhythmic sound of tires on pavement created a comforting backdrop.

your mother’s eyes sparkled with a mixture of excitement and a touch of sadness. she reached over and gently squeezed your hand, her grip warm and reassuring. “are you excited, honey?” she asked.

your father, who sat in the front seat, spent the entire ride bombarding you with questions about pepper spray.

you managed to drown out your parents, looking out the window, watching the cityscape evolve as you approached your dorm. the towering skyscrapers seemed to reach for the sky, casting long shadows over the bustling streets. you felt a knot of nervous energy settle in your stomach.

at your dorm, your parents helped you carry your bags up to your room. the air tingled with the scent of freshly painted walls and the promise of new beginnings. your room was a blank canvas, waiting for you to imprint it with your personality.

as you unpacked, your mother offered suggestions for organizing your belongings, and your father, more practically, made a list of all the necessities you needed to get like extra blankets and a first aid kit.

yuna, whose school went back in session a few days earlier, texted you inviting you to hang out with her and her roommate. you walked your parents back to their hotel, eating takeout from a nearby chinese restaurant in their room.

as the meal came to an end, there was a bittersweet air, as you gathered your things and left their room. you met yuna in a park downtown, sitting with her roommate. you ran towards her, the anticipation and joy bubbling over. she enveloped you in a tight hug. “i’m so glad you’re finally here.”

as you walked through the park, the conversation flowed effortlessly. you felt a sense of peace settle over you. it was like the first taste of the home you were building for yourself in this new, unfamiliar place.

you arrived back at your dorm alone. your room greeted you with a sense of familiarity. your side was a collage of memories and personal touches – framed photos, trinkets from home, and the soft glow of fairy lights casting a warm, golden hue.

you sat on your bed, looking out the window, the skyscrapers now standing in line with you. the city’s pulsed thrummed faintly in the distance. gone were the nerves that accompanied you earlier. in their place, a newfound sense of determination settled within you. you knew you had to do what you needed to make this place your own. it was the beginning of a new chapter, and you were ready to embrace it with open arms.

and luckily for you, this new chapter did not come at the detriment of your relationship at first. for the first two months of the semester, you and soobin were still talking everyday and about everything – your classes, the new recipes you were working on, how one of your professors worked at one of the most famous restaurants in the world, and about your friends, how much yuna’s presence helped you settle in, how your roommate neither leaves the room nor says a word to you.

for the first time in this relationship, you could almost say that everything was fine.

but as time went on, you felt yourselves shifting into your old patterns of not talking to each other. in the back of your mind, you couldn’t shake off the feeling that soobin had lied. it seemed like everything was changing. or maybe he was right. maybe this was how it always was. there were never enough hours in the day for you guys to be together and you were coming to find that had always been a pattern throughout your relationship. it was just like eighth grade, or the summer before he left for college, or his first semester of college. the story was almost exactly the same – first it was missing texts because of conflicting class times and time zones. but then hours became days which became weeks and before you knew it, winter break was knocking on your door.

this was the first time you would see soobin in four months and the only thing that you wanted to do was melt into his arms. the familiar sights of your childhood neighborhood rushed past as your dad drove you home from the airport. every turn brought you closer to that one house on the street, the house that held so many memories, and now, the promise of reconnection.

as the car pulled into your driveway, you couldn’t contain your excitement. leaping out, you dashed inside your house, tossing your bags onto your bedroom floor with reckless abandon.

his mother greeted you at the door. “y/n, honey, you’re back!” she exclaimed, pulling you into a tight embrace.

growing up, you never spent much time outside of soobin’s bedroom in his home. his father’s relentless work schedule and his mother’s hesitancy to host guests left the rest of the house shrouded in a quiet unfamiliarity. as you walked through the hallways, you thought about how cold and gray the house looked the summer they moved in. it wasn’t much different now.

a deep breath steadied you as you approached soobin’s closed door.

some things didn’t change. the butterflies that swarmed around in your stomach were a constant companion that signaled you were exactly where you needed to be. but then you thought about how lonely you were without him this semester and you decided that maybe everything changing was for the best.

“y/n, you’re home?” his face betrayed him showing confusion. he never had the best poker face.

“yeah,” you affirmed softly, pushing open the door. there, before you, sat a girl at his desk.

or not.

“uh, this is my friend from school, arin. she couldn’t get a flight home for winter break, so she’s staying here.” soobin explained.

“oh,” you responded with a mix of emotions swirling beneath the surface.

arin extended her hand to you. “hi, it’s so nice to meet you. you must be soobin’s neighbor.”

“and his girlfriend,” you added, declaring your place in the room.

awkward tension hung in the air, a palpable shift in dynamics. as the evening unfolded, you settled into a corner of the room, watching the two converse. your gaze shifted between them, your mind a whirlwind of emotions. you marveled at the ease with which they fell into conversation, recounting stories, laughing. a truly unsettling sight. a pang of envy tugged at your heart.

as the night wore on, their voices became a distant hum to you. you felt like a silent observer, a piece of scenery, fading into the background. you did not plan on watching your boyfriend giggle at someone else’s stories for three hours. you longed for his attention, but that seemed like an impossible request.

soobin, engrossed in his conversation, was too oblivious to your discomfort. it wasn’t that he didn’t care, but rather he was just caught up.

you watched them with a mixture of longing and resignation, trying to convince yourself that this was just a temporary moment of disconnect and that soobin would turn his attention back to you soon. but with each passing minute, that hope waned.

gathering resolve, you got up. “i think i’m going to head home.” you announced.

soobin and arin turned their attention to you, momentarily pulling away from their conversation. 

“are you sure?” soobin asked you.

you nodded. “yeah, it’s been a long day. i’ll see you later, soobin. it was nice to meet you, arin.” you turned back to your boyfriend, waiting for his response.

“i’ll walk you home,” he offered.

leaving the room, you couldn’t help but steal a glance back at arin, who was now engrossed in something on her phone. the ache in your chest grew.

the two of you stood in front of your house, the chill of the evening air settling around you. the soft glow from the porch light illuminated the path that led to your front door.

“so, she’s staying the entirety of winter break?” you asked.

“yup,” soobin replied, his words punctuated by a casual pop of the ‘p’. “is there something wrong?”

you hesitated for a moment. “no,” you finally shook your head, a small, rueful smile gracing your lips. “i just wanted to spend time with you alone.”

“we can still spend time together,” he assured. “i feel like you two would get along. she’s a lot like you.”

the reassurance didn’t offer the comfort you sought. instead, it settled uneasily in your stomach. you offered a distracted response, your gaze drifting from the quiet street to your front door. 

“yeah, maybe.”

“are you okay?” soobin asked, pulling you back to the present moment.

you forced a smile, masking the swirl of conflicting emotions beneath the surface. “yeah, just tired.”

“okay, goodnight, i’ll see you tomorrow.” he said, leaning down to kiss you. the touch of his lips felt foreign, like a puzzle piece that no longer fit quite right. it was an odd sensation, leaving you with a lingering sense of disconnection. like you were slipping away from each other. you didn’t want to think too much about it, but deep down you knew that no matter how tightly you tried to hold on, it would be no use.

“goodnight,” you whispered, stepping back and slipping into the warmth of your house.

the days that followed were a dance of awkwardness and unspoken tension. you yearned for soobin’s attention, for the familiar touch of his hand, but it just seemed so out of reach.

one chilly afternoon, you all gathered at a small diner on the corner of town. the warm scent of comfort food wrapped around you as you settled into the vinyl booth opposite arin. your boyfriend trailed behind you, hesitating for a moment before sliding into the booth beside you, a subtle shift that did not go unnoticed. it was a tiny pang, but it was there.

you smiled and tried to shake off the unease, focusing on the menu in front of you. as you chatted about school and plans for the break, you couldn’t help but notice soobin’s gaze flickering between the two of you. it was as if he was trying to find balance in a delicate equation.

another time, the three of you planned to visit the ice skating rink. when you arrived at soobin’s house, you were met with the unfamiliar sight of arin in the front seat of the car. you hesitated for a moment, unsure of where to sit. the glance you exchanged with arin held a silent question, but before you could say anything, soobin assured you it wasn’t a big deal.

as the car pulled away, the hum of their conversation and the pulse of the music filled the space, leaving you feeling like a distant observer.

you invited soobin over for a movie night, so imagine your surprise when you opened your front door to see both of them. you smiled dropped as you welcomed them into your house. this was supposed to bring back a flicker of normalcy. you were supposed to nestle into your boyfriend’s side. but even as the movie played, there was a subtle shift in the air. every moment spent with arin was a reminder of the growing distance, like a river slowly widening between you and the person you held closest.

then came that one precious weekend, a rare convergence of circumstances. both of you found your parents out of town at the same time. you invited soobin over and unfortunately, arin was working on a project for school so she couldn’t join. you had to stifle a surge of joy that threatened to bubble over.

“i’m so happy that we’re finally spending time together,” you exclaimed, gently closing your bedroom door behind you. soobin sat on your bed, with your computer resting on his lap. “alone.” you emphasized, a smile playing on your lips.

with purposeful steps, you crossed the room. you carefully lifted the laptop from his lap, placing it on your bedside table. then, with a graceful movement, you straddled his lap, feeling the warmth and familiarity of his presence beneath you.

“i really missed you,” you murmured, your breath mingling with his. leaning in, you captured his lips in a tender kiss.

the room pulsed with newfound energy as the kiss deepened. soobin’s touch was gentle as his hands found their place on the small of your back, holding you close, grounding you in the moment.

as passion ignited between you, a fire that had been smoldering for far too long, you hands moved with purpose, fingers deftly working to remove the barrier that separated you from him.

but then, he pulled away, his breaths coming in measured, uneven intervals. “w-what are you doing?”

“i’m ready,” you replied, your own voice barely above a whisper. the air crackled with tension, every beat of your heart echoing in the silence that followed.

he sat up straighter, his gaze locked with yours. “are you sure?”

“yes, soobin, i’m sure,” you asserted, mustering more confidence. “i want this.”

he took a moment, his breath steadying, before he spoke. “alright,” he said softly.

he gently guided you back onto the bed. “it might be more comfortable if i’m on top,” he suggested. he removed his shirt, casually tossing it to a corner of your room. “please tell me if you want me to stop.”

you nodded in understanding.

“i’m serious, y/n. i need you to tell me if you’re uncomfortable.”

“okay, i will.”

your heart raced as you laid there, your senses heightened. nervous energy tingled through your veins as his hands caressed your sides. his fingers traced the curves of your hips and thighs slowly. every inch of your body lit with flames as he touched you ever so lightly.

slowly, you mirrored his movements, your hands reached for the hem of your t-shirt. with a deep breath, you took off the old t-shirt to match him, laying eagerly in your pretty pink bra.

he stopped to look at you. “wow.” he breathed out. a rush of warmth flooded your cheeks, and you instinctively buried your face in  your hands. he pulled your hands down. “don’t hide your face from me, baby.” he murmured with tender eyes. “you’re just so pretty.”

you pulled him down to kiss him. “i need you,” you moaned into the kiss.

soobin’s mouth never left your body as he fumbled with his pants. he licked and sucked on your neck, taking his time with his gray sweatpants. soft moans and sighs kept slipping from your lips as he marked your skin.

“wait,” he stopped. “do you have a condom?”

“top drawer,” you breathed out.

soobin reached into the drawer by the bed, his fingers deftly finding the box nestled amidst an array of trinkets.

“open up for me.” you did as he said, and spread your legs a little wider. he could tell you were nervous as he pulled down your shorts. “do you trust me?” he asked, to which you nodded. “it might hurt for a second, but i promise you, it will only be a tiny amount of pain.” you wrapped your legs around his waist and he slowly rocked his hips against you.

you felt him position his hips so that they were perfectly in line with yours, his tip edging your entrance. he began to work his way into you inch by inch, before steadily pushing in until you were filled with his entire length. he threw his head back in pleasure as he bottomed out in you. your hands still on the back of his neck, you nudged him closer to you. “i know it hurts, baby. i’m sorry. just tell me what you need.”

the pain and discomfort was quickly replaced with pleasure. you gasped quietly, and soobin took it as a sign to finally begin moving. he fell into a rhythm of deep slow thrusts just sent you spiraling. he leaned his face down to your neck for a moment, pressing kisses along your flesh and nipping at your shoulder.

“f-fuck, you feel so good.”

he raised his face again, your noses inches apart. your face was contorted in pleasure and he couldn’t help but groan, thrusting into your harder.

“soobin?” you moaned out.

“yeah, baby? i’m right here.”

“i love you.”

he leaned back down to kiss you, his lips trailing down your jawline to your neck.

every kiss, every thrust progressively getting faster was sending you over the edge, making you pant and moan underneath him. the sounds coming from you were making his head spin and he could feel himself getting closer to his orgasm.

he was hitting you in the right spot, causing a knot to form in your lower stomach as you approached your breaking point. the knot in your stomach tightened and snapped. your walls spasmed and clenched around him as you released all over his cock. your body was shaking from the intensity, as you cried his name out. fueling his organs. his hips stuttered and he joined you in climax.

his movements ceased to slow rolls of his hips before eventually stopping.

soft pants and deep breaths invaded the space and filled the room around you. you stayed like that for a moment, catching your breath. he then carefully pulled out. he held your body close to his chest, his eyes softening as he looked down at your exhausted face. 

you nuzzled your head into soobin’s neck, kissing along his jawline. “that was so good.” you said between kisses. soobin responded with a contented hum, his fingers gently rubbing against your arm. the soft rustle of the sheets provided a soothing backdrop to the intimacy you had just shared, cocooning you in a bubble of fleeting bliss

but as the minutes passed, a subtle shift began to settle between you, like a distant tremor foreshadowing an impending quake. soobin’s touch, once tender and reassuring, began to falter. his breath, once steady and calming, now held an undertone of uncertainty.

“i should probably go back home,” soobin said, his arm slowly retreating from around your shoulder. “arin is alone.”

“seriously?” you turned to face him, a mixture of confusion and anger plastered on your face.

“what? she’s a guest.”

“you’re leaving?” you hold onto his arm, desperate to keep him close. “i thought you were going to spend the night.”

“i can’t leave her alone.”

“soobin, i just lost my virginity to you…” your voice trailed off, tears forming in your eyes. your hands dropped to your lap. the room seemed to close in around you, suffocating in its silence.

“y/n–” you could feel your blood boiling.

“don’t.” you shifted away from him on the bed. “i just lost my virginity to you and you want to spend the night with some other girl.”

“i’m not spending the night with her.”

“what’s so special about her?”

“what?”

“why have you chosen to spend every moment of this break with her instead of me?”

“we spend time together.”

“yeah, with her always there.”

the room seemed to hold its breath, the weight of your words settling into the air.

“she’s my friend and i care about her.”

“you care about her?” you asked, your voice barely above a whisper, every word laced with a pain that cut through the silence.

“yes i do. she couldn’t go home for winter break. I just want to make sure she doesn’t feel alone.”

“well what about me?”

“y/n, come on.”

“i told you i loved you.”

“y/n, i–” you could almost hear your heart break. he couldn’t even say it back to you.

you quickly sobered up, your walls rising like a fortress around you. “i think you should leave.”

“hey,” he reached out to hold you, but you swatted his hand away, the touch too little, too late. his fingers hung in the air for a moment before dropping, defeated.

“no. i don’t want you here anymore. you should go home.”

soobin stood up and got dressed. his movements were deliberate and slow as he gathered his scattered clothes. he dressed in silence, every gesture laden with a sense of finality. as he stood by the door, fully dressed, soobin turned to look at you. his eyes held a mixture of regret and longing, a silent plea for understanding that hung in the space between you. you met his gaze, your heart aching with a complex blend of emotions – love, betrayal, and a yearning for something that now felt impossibly distant.

the door creaked open and closed softly, the sound echoing in the hollow space left behind. 

putting on a robe, you sat by your window, watching him go into his house, praying, hoping that he would turn around, see you sitting by your window, come back to you. but he just walked into his house, the door closing with a finality that sent a shiver down your spine. your room felt emptier than ever before.

you laid in your bed and let the tears fall freely, each drop a painful release. the weight of reality settled on your chest. a heavy ache seeped into your bones.

the days that followed felt like a slow-motion train wreck. it was as if the color had drained from the world, leaving only shades of gray. every passing moment that you didn’t hear from soobin was a jagged piece of glass, cutting into your soul. each night seemed longer than the last, filled with the silent echo of his absence.

you didn’t even know what hurt more — the raw vulnerability of giving him everything, only to have him leave, or the deafening silence that followed. the unanswered questions swirled like a storm in your mind. why hadn’t he reached out? was he feeling the same heartache that clung to your every breath?

his parents even visited for dinner and you had to paint a smile on your face throughout to hide the storm that raged within. when his mom inquired about your absence, you concocted a tale, your voice steady even though your heart felt like it might shatter.

other than your parents, the only person you spoke to was yuna, who became your lifeline even though she was on vacation with her parents. she was a voice of reason and a source of much-needed laughter. “honestly, fuck him. and fuck her too,” she declared.

“she didn’t even do anything,” you murmured in arin’s defense.

“who the fuck sits in the front seat of someone else’s boyfriend’s car?” yuna fired back, making you chuckle.

"i wish you were here. it's so miserable. i can't even leave my house because i'm scared i'm going to see him," you confessed, your voice a whisper edged with pain.

"if i was there, he'd probably have to file a restraining order against me."

returning to campus was like stepping onto a battlefield, but yuna was determined to wage war against the memories that threatened to engulf you and make you forget about a certain dark haired boy whose name you were no longer allowed to say. “you know what they say: in order to get over someone, you need to get under someone else.” she proclaimed from your closet, picking out something for you to wear tonight.

“i don’t know if i’m ready to get under someone else,” you admitted, fixing your mascara in your bathroom mirror, dressed in your robe.

“doesn’t matter if you actually do. you just need to get your mind off of him.” she hands you a black dress. “wear this. it always looks good on you.”

and so, you allowed yourself to be swept up in a night of bar hopping. the pulsing music and laughter washed over you like a healing balm. for a few precious hours, you were just another college student, drowning your sorrows in neon lights and thumping bass.

between the nights out, you threw yourself completely into your studies, the pursuit of a summer internship becoming your north star. you came to school to do something, and you weren’t going to let your heartache consume you.

spring was always a happy time for you. the air was warm, carrying with it the promise of renewal. it had been months since you had thought about soobin, and even longer since you had seen him. for the first time since that unfortunate night, you felt like you were completely over him. or at least getting there.

as you strolled back to your dorm from class, the world hummed with a quiet energy. the sun hung low in the sky and the air was soft and warm against your skin. but then you saw a familiar silhouette leaning against your dorm building. time seemed to stretch in that moment, the world around you fading into a blur. your heart quickened its pace, a staccato beat echoing in your chest.

"y/n," he breathed, his voice a soft plea that hung in the air. his presence was a sudden gust of wind, stirring the carefully constructed walls around your heart.

your guard was up, a fortress of steel around your heart. you wouldn't let him waltz back into your life just to tear you apart again. "what are you doing here?" you demanded, your voice steady despite the turmoil within.

"i wanted to talk to you."

"how did you find my address?"

"your mom gave it to my mom, who gave it to me."

you let him into your building, signing him in with the security guards in the front. the familiar surroundings now felt foreign with him there. in the confines of your dorm room, he looked around, his gaze grazing over the familiar details that now seemed foreign.

“you said you wanted to talk. so talk.” you said to him sitting down. you were so grateful that your roommate had gone to class. you really didn’t need her to be in the room with you now.

he glanced around, his face marked with uncertainty. “i don’t know where to start.”

you met his gaze without a word.

“i guess… i could start with sorry.” he offered with a nervous chuckle.

“i think that’s too little, too late, soobin.” you asserted, matter of factly.

“i miss you.”

“you can’t keep saying that.” your shoulders sunk. looking at him now, you could feel all the emotions bubbling back up — the anger, the hurt, the tears, they were all coming back to you.

“i know, but it’s true.” he rushed to add. “that’s why i came here. i wanted to see you. i know we didn’t leave things the right way.”

“soobin, you were the first person i ever had sex with and you left me right after.” you tried to keep your cool and maintain your composure, but it was getting increasingly harder.

“i-i know. i’m sorry,” he stammered, remorse filling his eyes.

“is that all you came here to say? sorry?” he looked at you apologetically, offering no further words. “you hurt me so much and you couldn’t even say anything to me afterwards. i waited every day for months to see if you would ever call me and you didn’t. it was like i meant nothing to you. it was just so easy for you to forget that i existed.” as the words flowed, you felt a strange mixture of relief and sadness wash over you. the wounds were still fresh, but there was a catharsis in finally addressing the unspoken.

“i’m s—” he stopped himself. “i know i hurt you. i don’t know what i can do to make it right.”

“i don’t think there’s anything you can do to make it right.” you said, wiping the slow tears from your face. you sat up, meeting his gaze squarely. “i spent our entire relationship fighting for you to pay attention to me. i can’t do that anymore. i don’t want to beg someone to care about me.”

“i care about you. you know that.”

“do i?”

“i didn’t think this conversation would go like this if i’m being completely honest.”

“i’m not angry at you anymore. at least i’m trying not to be.” you tell him. “and i don’t hate you, if you thought i did. i don’t think i could ever hate you.”

“i don’t think i can’t not have you in my life.”

“i’m still your neighbor.” you joked.

“it’s not the same.” he admitted quietly, sitting beside you. “y/n, i love you.”

“soobin–” you turned to face him, searching his eyes for any sign that he understood the depth of your pain.

“i know, it’s too late. i just wanted you to know.” his gaze fixed on his hands, fingers tracing invisible patterns on his jeans. “i can’t erase the past. but i want to try to make amends, to find a way back to some semblance of… of friendship, maybe.”

friendship. the word hung in the air, a fragile bridge between your shared history and the uncertain future.

“i don’t know if we can be friends. not right now, at least. maybe not ever.”

he looked up, pain etched in the frown lines across his face. “i understand,” he murmured, voice heavy with regret.

silence enveloped, broken only by the distant sounds of life outside. after what felt like an eternity, you finally spoke, your voice softer now. “i think i need time. to you know, figure out my shit.”

he nodded. “i want you to know that i’m sorry. truly.”

“i know.”

with a heavy heart, you walked him to the door. as he left, you closed the door behind him, leaning against it for support. alone in the quiet of your dorm, you let the tears come. finally you had a release of all the emotions long held in check. you had tried your hardest to bury them, but now it was time for them to finally come out. the pain was still there, but with each tear that fell, you felt a small measure of healing begin.

in the days that followed, you took each moment as it came, allowing yourself to grieve for what was lost and to slowly rediscover the strength within you. spring continued to dance outside, and you vowed to find your own renewal.

taglist: @boba-beom @dearlyjun @atinyniki @makoto @bunnie-hq @wiisoob @isabellah29 @pluviophile-xxx

fill out this form to join my taglist! author's note :: finally edited!! classic quintessential fay angst!! we're so back!! I wrote this story over the course of two months. it is the longest thing I have written so far and I am super proud of it. please lmk if I missed any warnings or have any typos. I really hope you enjoyed it

[bigbawdy-benzz]

*Touches your shoulder* Hey~ what about 42! Miles morales x shy!reader

SUPER SHY

Pairing: Miles42! X Shy! Black Plus size Fem Reader

Summary : Y/N has been infatuated with miles for a hot minute but she's too shy to say anything and to make the first move. She would never think that he knows of her or even notices her until one small incident.

A/N: Miles is any age you want him to be in the fic, New jeans dropped super shy and it goes with this fic perfectly! THANK YOU FOR THE REQ As a recovering shy person you know I had to do my big one with this one ENJOY GUYS!!! Here’s Pt.2

It was a new day at Visions Academy; you blasted Tyler the Creator in your air pods while walking through the hallways. It was soothing to sound out all the noise. You walk into your first class ELA sitting down sighing wanting to go home. You put your head down wanting to get the school day over with. You suddenly hear noises over your headphones. You look to your left, and it was Miles and his friends being loud, you roll your eyes at his friends but keep your eyes on Miles, he looked so fine with his 2 braids you thought to yourself. You didn’t even realize you were staring, Miles looked feeling eyes on him making eye contact with you grinning. You felt your heart drop to your ass, thinking that he wouldn’t even notice you. To you, you thought Miles was kind of out of your league, he was kind of popular, all the girls wanted him, and he was sooooo incredibly fine. It's not that you don’t like yourself; it was just rare seeing him around girls like you that made you feel like getting his attention was impossible but, you always had his attention you just never noticed it. You decided to stop zoning out overthinking and started doing your work occupying yourself. You nod your head to WUSYUNAME by Tyler the Creator finishing your work just in time class was over. You see everyone else packing their things and you do the same leaving the classroom, you see your friends huddled by your locker.

“HEYYY Y/N” your friend Ocean yells out, you take one of your airpods out waving at her walking up to her and your other friend.

“Hey girlies” You said with a smile

“Girl how's it going with you know who?” Your other friend Aaliyah asks

“Horrible, well not really I was staring at him and he grinned at me so you can say it's over” You huff covering your face.

“I meannnn him grinning at you is amazing he noticed you babes” Ocean stated rubbing Y/N’s back

“Yeah it's better than him screwing his face up”. Aaliyah adds while you were putting your things in your locker.

“Yeah lets just get to math before Ms.Nelson gets on our ass and she gets mad yelling at us” You stated with a laugh closing your locker walking to class.

“Oh yeah she might call my mom again on her bullshit” Ocean huffs

“Nah we need to find her a good wig she’ll be nice to us for a good 2 weeks”. Aaliyah announces.

“No fr and set her ass up on a date she needs some dick” You chimed in laughing your ass off.

“YOO yall evil for this shit she needs more like locs she can’t keep that wig shit too high maintenance for her ''. Ocean replies, it was all laughs walking to class until you bump into someone

BOOM!

Your books and their books drop on the floor and you’re incredibly embarrassed scrambling to pick your things up, trying not to crease your Jordans.

“I'm so so sorry” You say picking up their books and yours.

“No it's ok…you don’t have to pick my books up after all I bumped into you” They say catching you off guard recognizing the voice. He bends down helping you pick up the books.

“No I bumped into you it's my fault i'm sorry” Y/N apologies once again

“Stop apologizing, it's okay mamita I just need to watch where I'm going next time”. They say helping you up, the way that ‘mamita’ rolled off their tongue had you weak in the knees.

“Im Miles” He says, giving you a smile, handing you your books.

[sinofwriting]

Wine - Oscar Piastri (lover verse)

Words: 977 Summary: Oscar (and Apples) go on the screaming meals podcast after everyone finds out about their marriage. Note(s): This part of the lover verse and I recommend you read the first part before this one so it makes sense. Read lover here

Masterlist | Support Me! | lover verse

“We have an Aussie on the pod today.” James says. “Indeed we do. The wonder boy himself, Oscar Piastri!” Clement continues and the three guys clap while Oscar looks behind the camera where his wife is feeling a little awkward. “Thank you for coming, Oscar. Was a bit of bitch to get you on though.” Oscar chuckles, nodding. “Just a bit. I’m glad I could make it though. I’ve been watching since the first episode.” “That’s right.” Marcus says. “I remember you texting me about it.”

“Ladies, Gentleman, you may notice we have five glasses on the table in front of us. And that is because Oscar’s wife is here as well.” “Hello!” She greets from behind the camera, sending a smile James’ way. She and the insurance broker had spent a fair amount of time together when Oscar was in F2. “She also brought the wine for today.” Clem chimes in, picking the bottle up. “Really, Apples is just trying to prove that she is the best guest to have.” He lets out a laugh seeing the label. “Ah, a bit of DR3 wine. I haven’t actually had this yet. Is it good?” He turns his head a bit to ask her, knowing that between her and Oscar she’s the one who likes wine more. She nods. “My mom loves it as well and you know her, bit of a wine snob. I also brought another one though if we get through that one a bit too quickly.” Clem makes a small noise, hand coming over his heart and he looks back at Oscar. “Mate, I might have to steal your wife.” Oscar shakes his head at the Frenchman but chuckles. He hadn’t expected the friendship between her and Clem, but it had started from their shared interest in wine and had only grown.

“Do you mind if we actually talk about you, Apples?” James asks, as Marcus takes the wine from Clem to open it. Easily passing the cork over to Clem to smell. “Not at all.” She says, reaching somewhat into frame to take the glass of wine from Marcus, giving him a quick squeeze to the hand in silent thanks after.

“So the Australian Grand Prix.” Marcus starts, handing the next glass over to Oscar, who immediately groans at the words. “I mean, what a home race.” The younger man makes a face, shifting in place as he clutches the glass of wine. “It was something.” He allows. “It was a clusterfuck, mate.” James chuckles, taking the next glass of wine from Marcus. “I’ve never seen anything like it. I mean truly.” Marcus says, passing Clem a glass who gives a silent cheer to him, before finally pouring himself a glass. “I mean, the media ran fucking wild and it was nuts.” “I was there with Clem for the F2 race and oh yeah, the media was something.” “I mean,” Oscar huffs, running a hand over his face. It had been months but still he was bothered over this. “It wasn’t like a secret y’know? Everyone in F3 and F2 knew about it. I mean obviously.” He waves a hand at three guys. “So I’m just amazed at the press and social media just not knowing it.” Clem wags a finger at the camera. “And you call yourself a journalist. Couldn’t even do basic research.” “Seriously.” Oscar says, and Marcus can’t help but laugh at how bothered Oscar is. It was a change from the usual unflappable or unbothered way he was.

“I also found out from Mrs. Piastri herself that the drivers didn’t know?” James asks. “They didn’t.” She confirms. “Well, Logan obviously did.” Marcus says, remembering how Logan had taken a weird older brother role to the Aussie couple. “But the rest didn’t? Not even Ocon? Or Alonso?” Oscar looks over at her, raising an eyebrow and she gives a shrug. “Ocon didn’t, Alonso, I mean maybe? He congratulated me after the news broke when he saw me next, but I mean it’s Alonso, who ever knows with him.” “Fair point.” James chuckles, lifting his glass a bit.

Apples watches from behind the camera for the rest of the podcast, only coming into frame once more for a refill on her glass of wine. Though she occasionally says something, fake chiding one of the boys or urging Oscar to open up a bit more, her husband still a bit too aware of the camera on him. Makes her wish she had taken that shot that Clem offered her before they started rolling, knowing that Oscar would have also had one if she had.

When they finish up, Oscar goes to move, switch to the other couch so Clem and James can sit with Marcus to film yeah g’day mate, but Marcus stills him and waves her over. She raises an eyebrow aware of the still rolling cameras but she goes over, easily sitting on the arm of the couch that Oscar is pressed against. As soon as she sits the other two are also piling onto the couch, Clem diving in between Oscar and Marcus, elbowing the Kiwi as James tries to grab the back of the French’s shirt, just barely managing to pull him up off the couch.

“Sit on the arm mate. You’re tiny enough. And budge over, Marcus.” “Why do I have to move?” Marcus asks, but slides over, knocking his and Oscar’s elbows together. “Because you're small enough to be in the middle. It’ll look weird with me.”

As the three start to bicker, Oscar leans his head against her and she runs her fingers through his hair, smiling down at him as he tilts his head backwards to look up at her. “You alright, Os?” She murmurs, Marcus’ squawk of protest surely prevents the mic from picking up her question. He nods, flashing her a smile.

@cixrosie @gemofthenight @copper-boom @boiohboii @iloveyou3000morgan @Benstormy @peachiicherries @topguncultleader @lpab

[thethreeeyed-raven]

Pookie u said u wanted Zoro reqs and I’m here to help

So maybe Buggy’s sis?? Like apart of his lil clown posse thing and her and Zoro meet and yeah idk im dumb u can do whatever w this 🤷‍♀️

-🦈

thank you, goodnight

navigation | a/n : i changed it a bit and made the reader someone who was imprisoned by buggy instead, i haven’t written x reader in a while so this is a bit rusty, i’ve been working on something atla related which wont be coming out any time soon with the pace i’m going at😭, tysm to my bestie who helped me with this i was struggling😭 | warnings : minor injuries, weapons, implied feelings, sanji smirks a lot | tags : @lost-in-fiction-like-ur-mom , @knight-of-flowerss

music :

(it gives me zoro vibes)

You had joined the Straw Hats after their scuffle with your captor Buggy the clown.

Buggy decided that you were going to be apart of his circus when he 'conquered' your village, Until the Straw Hats freed you and your people.

Their Captain, Monkey D. Luffy, must have saw some potential in you as he offered you a place in the crew.

You just couldn't say no and so now you were apart of their crew.

You and Zoro were like two peas in a pod. Wherever he went, you followed, wherever you went, he followed. You couldn't stay away from one another.

You assumed he was impressed with your skills with a whip and your fists as you were with his swordsmanship. (You also fancied him a bit.)

For weeks and weeks you had pestered Zoro to teach you his admirable techniques but he refused every time.

Catching his eye from across the deck, you skipped your way over to his slouching form, slinging your arm over his broad shoulder.

"So, about those sword lessons..." You pretended to inspect your nails. You could practically hear his eye roll.

"No." He replied just as a smirking Sanji walked past.

"Sword lessons?" The cook asked with a hint of amusement, okay, maybe a lot. The both of you gave him a deadpan look. Sanji raised his hands as if to surrender. "Okay, okay."

Once Sanji left, you turned to look back at Zoro, putting on your best 'puppy dog' eyes.

Finally, Zoro turned to you. He zoned out for a moment before coming back to himself. "Fine. But only if you show me how to work that whip."

You cheered and clapped victoriously. "We'll start tonight."

The both of you got to work once everyone was settled and the stars twinkled in the night sky. Zoro decided you would be training with his swords first, a whip seemed hard to control.

"You need to hold it like this." Zoro placed his hand on top of yours where you held the handle of the sword. "Relax your hold, you're holding it too tight you will restrict movement."

You nodded in silent concentration, the moss head couldn't help but steal a glance at your overly focused face.

"Don't watch the sword, I'll let you off for now since this is only practise." Zoro let go of your hand and stood back to observe your stance. He put a foot in between your legs and shifted one of them wider. "With these types of swords you don't need two hands to hold them."

You nodded again. "Okay."

Hours had passed since your lessons began and it was almost the start of a new day. Many injuries were acquired. You fetched the first aid kit that Sanji kept from the kitchen.

Zoro had a tiny cut on his cheek and various other little wounds from your sharp whip. The injuries didn't bother him of course, but Sanji would kill you if they got infected.

"There." You placed a tiny band aid on the cut. "It's a good job you didn't seriously hurt, Luffy would have my head." The both of you chuckled.

Zoro shook his head, still chuckling a bit. "Luffy's too nice, he'd probably cry at you instead."

You stifled another laugh, but couldn't deny you still felt a little bad for the wounds inflicted on Zoro by your weapon.

"You okay?" Zoro commented, noticing your moment of silence.

"Oh, yeah don't worry." You lifted a hand as if to physically brush off the man's worry. He gave you a pointed look before thanking you and standing.

Just as Zoro was about to return to his cabin to get cleaned up, your words halted his steps.

"I never thanked you."

He looked over his shoulder at you, brow furrowed in confusion. "For what?"

Whenever you thought of that day, your eyes would glass over and the overwhelming feeling of relief would wash over you. "For taking me away that day, it was the kindest thing anyone has ever done for me in my life."

"All of that was Luffy." Zoro denied.

Yet, you shook your head. "It was a group decision. Thank you anyway."

You stood and walked towards Zoro, cupping his cheek, then leaned in to gently press a kiss to the other.

"Goodnight."

The next morning, Zoro was greeted with the smirking face of Sanji.

"Fuck off."

[anemonelovesfiction]

I Don’t Hate You

Ao’nung x Fem! Human! Reader

Warnings ⚠️ : Oral (fem receiving), cussing, MDNI 🔞

Thank you to whoever requested this, this is for you ❤️

I didn’t proof read as I am my own beta reader and I’m at work, sorry if its not too smutty for you, if it was actual smut it would have been too long!! As always English is stricken through

Translation Station

Tawtute: Sky Person (human)

Marui: Home (in Metkayina)

Ma’ite: my daughter

Innui- (ee-new-ee): made up name for Ronals youngest child

Tsahik: Spiritual healter; Shaman

Vrrtep: Demon

Sa’nok: Mother

Tsmuke: Sister

Iknimaya: Rite of Passage

Tsurak: Warriors mount

Syulang: Flower

Tewng: Loincloth

Word count 2.8k

I was only acting in the way everyone else had expected me to. Given the predicament I was in- a tawtute won the hearts of not one but both my parents, leading to a ritual in which the three of them were mated- I would say what I had currently just said to my newest sibling was up to par with what anyone else in the village believed I would say. Something hurtful about her extra digit, something about her looks, something about her size, how much of an inconvenience she was; and I’d said all of them. She was a shy thing and often spoke to Tsireya in a hushed voice, my sister had welcomed her and her mother in with open arms, but I was yet to be won over, but I was truly happy for my parents for having found their missing piece, I just wish she weren’t a tawtute, or that her daughter was unbelievably beautiful.

Her lips thin in an attempt to stop herself from crying but the fat tears in her eyes were a dead giveaway that what I had said had hurt her, and even though this was the last thing I wanted to do to the beauty that stood before me, I knew it was expected of me to hate her, so I acted like I did. My ears flicker and become downcast as I hear her sniffle, once more attempting to keep in her tears before they spilt on her cheeks, and she managed to look as beautiful as the day I first saw her.

Without another word she turns briskly and starts running in the direction she had come from, my heart hurts as I notice she picks up her hand to wipe what I assume are her tears, her sniffle causing my ears to perk up in an attempt to continue listening to her, I sigh. I want to chase after her and apologize but there were people watching.

_________

“Thats why I don’t talk to him, mama, I can’t keep-“ I stop as soon as the marui pod’s curtain was drawn back and Ronal -my stepmother- walks in, I don’t bother continuing the conversation and force myself to look away from her stare, one look and I’m sure I’d spill everything I’d just told my mom.

I make an effort to speak in English to my mom in order to prevent anyone from eavesdropping, but she had started teaching Ronal and Tonowari the language so they understand what the humans who drop supplies off say and they’re picking up on it very well. I’m starting to feel as though no one is on my side anymore.

“Ma’ite-“ She coos as she runs her thumb on my cheek gently, I only pout at her response, knowing she’d switched to Na’Vi so Ronal would understand clearly.

“What is wrong, you look bothered, are the village boys being mean to you again?” Ronal asks as she settles the newest addition to the family down, I only avoid my mothers gaze and watch as the baby starts crawling around curiously checking everything out before smiling widely and crawling faster toward where my mother and I stood. She worked quickly to make her way toward me and wobbly stood herself by using my thighs as support, she reached the length of my mid thigh in full height and she was only nine months old.

“Forget it.” I mumble before gently shifting Innui to support herself on my mother, making sure she was stable before walking out of the marui without sparing a glance toward the tsahik.

I don’t bother lifting my head off the knitted walkway as I’ve slipped on it and ended up with one foot through the hole one too many times, a bad habit I’d created as I walked on the beach, looking at the sand seep through my toes with every step I took, not bothering to check my surroundings. Although if I’m honest I would have thought that I wouldn’t be bothered since it was almost dinner time and a majority of people were starting to wash up to prepare food.

“Hey little freak, what are you doing out here alone?” My back stiffens and my head is immediately snapping up at the sound of his voice, a shiver runs through my body as I slowly turn my head and coming face to face with one of Ao’nungs lacky’s, the one I stupidly mistaken for Rotxo when I first met him, but he was so unoriginal I didn’t bother learning his name.

“I’m not a freak.” I responded while still keeping my back to him.

“I’m sure your fourth finger would beg to differ, you’re so weird, yet so interesting.” He stated clearly and I could feel my face growing hot at his words. He always has to find a way to torment me and I thought I’d escaped it until tomorrow but I was wrong. I could feel my body tensing in anger and I’d rather not blow up and give him another reason to hate me, so I turn around to finally face him.

“Four fingers or not-“ I lifted my hand to show him my fingers and wiggling them for added effect “-I am not weird.” I managed to get through without stuttering.

“With the way you act I’d think the reason you torment me is because you like me.” I roll my eyes as I cross my hands at my chest and notice his hairless brows furrowing, giving me an angered expression, he sneers and gets close to my face, causing me to back up.

“I would never like someone as worthless and useless as you. Get that through your thick tawtute head, you are undesirable and it is unclear how your vrrtep sa’nok managed to sneak her way into our clan leaders home.” He places a finger on my chest and pushes me rather harshly, causing me to fall on my bum.

“What is going on.” An angered voice spoke from behind me, the unmistakable sound of my step-brothers voice ringing through the air, I furrow my brows in confusion before turning to look at him, seeing the water droplets falling from his skin and hair, he must have gone for a swim before dinner.

“Your vrrtep tsmuke was mouthing off to me-“ He begins with his lies to justify why he’d pushed me but I scoff at his words before feeling Ao’nung reaching down to lift me up, I’d never felt his skin before and even though he’d just stepped out of the water it was warm.

“She is not a vrrtep, she is family, you do not go around pushing Tsireya like this, do you?” Ao’nung is quick with his words and doesn’t let his act of lifting me up deter his staring contest with Great Value Rotxo- Rotxo from wish? I try not to giggle at my thoughts.

“I am only treating her how you do. Is it only okay for you?” He asks with a slight snarl.

“Leave her alone.” He stated in an authoritative voice and my knees almost buck, he almost sounded like his father, I would be lying if I didn’t find my step father attractive, but I couldn’t bring myself to think of him that way.

Wish Rotxo shifts his eyes down to my blank expression, before they dart up above my head at what I could only assume was my step-brother, his face showing annoyance and anger before turning around and walking away without another word.

“Stop getting into trouble, you always need my help-“

“Are you fucking kidding me? I didn’t ask for your help, you just came up here flaunting your-“ I stop myself as he looks at me the way his mother stared at mine after yelling in English, understanding of the action but not the language. I roll my eyes and squeeze them shut before taking a calming breath, letting a sigh roll off my body as I pinched the bridge of my nose, and looking up at my step brother.

“I didn’t ask for your help.” I stated in Na’Vi “I had the situation under control.”

“That is what you call ‘under control’, getting harassed by a man and being pushed by the mere strength of his finger?” He scoffs as he crosses his arms.

“How is that any different than what you do? You hate me just as much as he does. I didn’t know you wanted to be the only one who tortures me.” I roll my eyes and deliver the same amount of sass back to him.

“I don’t hate you.” He stares directly through my soul as he says these words and a shiver runs up my spine.

“You only say the mean things you’ve said to me if you hate someone, so do not lie to me and pretend you don’t-“

“I do not hate you.” He moved closer in a matter of a millisecond, his face close enough to touch mine, but he’s being serious.

“Ao’nung, stop lying, you don’t treat Tsireya the way you treat me.” I huff and cross my arms once more.

“Thats because I’m not in love with her.” He stated matter-of-factly and I open my mouth to yell at him for how he’s treated me some more but the sudden confession hits me like a ton of bricks.

“You-“ I stare at him as he nods slightly “-Me?” I ask as I point to myself and see him nod once more.

“But I-“ I stop as I attempt to analyze the situation.

“-and you!” I use my hand to signal to him and stop from speaking once more, lowering myself to the sand as I attempt to process it, yet am unable to. I can see he’s also sunken down to squat near me, paying close attention to me.

“Why?” I finally ask. His hand reached out to tuck a piece of my hair behind my ear.

“Because of who you are.” He shrugs.

“You’re kind to everyone in my family even when I wasn’t kind to you. You’re quick to learn a lot of things especially when it came to helping our parents spend some tome together by taking care of Innui. You’re adorable when you hold my baby sister in your tiny hands, especially when you make that face.” He points at me as I listen to him.

“Oh I get it, this is a joke.” I slap his finger away with the back of my hand and start to laugh.

_________

Her head tilted back and the melodious sound of her laughter made me angry at first, but the angle at which she held her head was perfect in showcasing the tattoo on her neck, the design she’s carefully chosen after passing her iknimaya- even as a tawtute she managed to bond with a tsurak, making me hopeful in her ability to bond with a mate. And not just any mate, me.

Some feeling must have overtaken me as my fingertips dance around the flesh of her neck, following the tattoo down toward her collar bones where they stop, her laughter had died down as soon as I’d touched her and my ears perk up at the slightest gasp mixed with a moan, my eyes darken as she backs up quickly, my first instinct was to grasp her by her neck, scooting closer to her.

“What are you-“

“Shh,” I shush her as my other hand carefully slides down the length of her arm and allowing myself to divulge in the smooth feeling of her soft skin. I finally take her small hand in mind and gently bring it up to my lips, eyes staring at hers, and kissing her knuckles gently.

“I. Do. Not. Hate. You.” I enunciate my words while using my thumb to caress the tattoo on her neck.

“Okay,” she mutters breathily, seemingly in a daze.

“Do you believe me now?” I ask as I get close to her face and watch her dazed stare, I can feel her breath quicken and grow heavier, her mouth slightly agape.

“Please-“ she stops herself from speaking and y hand instinctively presses on her neck, urging the words to slip out of them.

“Tell me syulang, please what?”

“Kiss me,” her eyes only focus on mine as I lean in and touch my lips toward hers, her the softness of her mouth on my lips had me feeling as if Eywa had taken me up to live with her, my entire being felt complete with this little tawtute.

I push my knees on the sand below, letting go of her neck and allowing my hand to wanter up her delicate cheek, my other hand pulling her waist closer toward me.

She nips at my lower lip and I back off immediately, wondering if the reason for her doing that was because I’d somehow been too rough or hurt her in any way, just to see her smiling shyly instead. Reaching her hands out to grasp my face, pulling me closer and looking into my eyes before leaning in and kissing me again.

I run my fingers along the rest of her body just wanting to feel all of her, feeling how her skin raises under my fingers and prickling a bit, making an effort to run my hands against her back and feeling her wriggle in my grasp.

“Fuck,” The foreign word escapes her mouth, drunk off her scent I continue kissing down her neck where her tattoo sat and hearing her beautiful moans.

“Wait, ‘Nung-“ She gasps as I gently nip at the skin on her neck and shivers at the feeling.

“Do you want me to stop?” I ask in a serious tone.

“N-no,” She murmurs.

“Then why wait?” I ask as my arm snakes around her waist again.

“The water-“ She turns her head to point at the tide and I feel the heat rise up in my chest. Whenever we choose to mate we usually do so in the water, and the fact that she remembered that made me feel happy, this was definitely the woman I wanted to mate with.

“Come.” I stand and gently tug on her arm as I walk toward the water.

_________

My tewng was pushed to the side, his mouth was working on my pussy, his tongue swished along the side of my clit, his hands were playing with my nipples, and my back was up against the rock of the retaining wall. I was furiously bucking my hips and attempting to keep my moans to a minimum in case other Na’Vi were nearby.

I could see the cook fires in the distance but they didn’t matter when my pussy was being devoured skillfully by the man who tore up my feelings, now he’s just tearing me up, and I loved it. I squeeze my thighs around his head as his tongue slides against a particularly sensitive area pf my clit, making me his tongue continue to slide over that same area, my nipples are being squeezed and I can feel myself losing control.

“I’m coming, ‘Nung-“ I gasp as I let go, the explosive feeling making my hips buck on their own accord and the waves of the ocean lapping up over my already sensitive stiffened nipples added another sense of euphoria. His hands had abandoned them and taken place to hold my thighs close to him as I came down from my high until I went lax in his hold.

He pops his head out from under the water with a smirk on his face, his first breath in wasn’t even that deep and made my cheeks sting at his previous words before he’d sunken under.

“Let me show you just how long I can hold my breath,”

“Wipe that smirk off your face.” I roll my eyes tiredly, I was just happy I’d already given him a hand job and half a blowjob before he’d gone down on me.

“I’m good.” He doesn’t even bother making it sound like a question at this point.

“Practice makes perfect I guess.” I joke and he can tell my underlying comment meant I knew he’d done this with other girls before.

“Yet none have ever tasted as sweet as you, syulang.”

“Sure,” I mumble as I reach over to grab my top, expertly putting it on my body in a quick fashion.

“Are you upset with me?” He asks as he places a gentle hand on my arm.

“No you big doofus, we need to go to dinner before ur parents think we’re out murdering each other,” I laugh lightly and his smile returns.

“I like seeing your smile.” I mutter almost too quiet, but his ears flicker when I say that, his cheeks turning a purplish color.

“I like seeing you.” He smiles sheepishly, something I’d never see him do before.

“I see you,” I mutter.

“I see you as well.”

[inubaki]

The Exchange (Chocolate)

Part 4

“What’s that?” Adam gave a collected sigh while bidding for his last ounce of patience. “Dad! Dad! What is it?” Cain tugged persistently at the end of Adam’s furs, whining when he failed to get a response.

Adam had long given up on attempting to pry him off his leg. Or correct him on his usage of the loose term ‘father’; Eve’s reinvented label towards Adam dispute all obvious falsehoods. But he had endured it for the children. Settling for their laughter and smiles while he threw himself to provide and protect. Never to abandon them like his creator’s had. Until recent revelations. “Cacao beans…” Adam mutters while trying to recall the plant’s attributes. He didn’t want to extend to much effort into something that couldn’t fill a gut or settle some bodily grievance. The recent heat wave had withered most of the season’s foliage leaving opinions limited to the family’s reserves. The crops had failed and Eve’s ‘easy solutions’ had Adam divided between rage and defeat.

Ideally he rolled the pod between his hands, testing its weight while checking for any contaminating punctures. Cain hugged his leg as he retrieved the knife from his belt- The same knife Eve had plunged repeatedly into his back. -rapping it against the pod’s shell to startle any critters. Cain reached up and slap it with a cubby hand before Adam pulled it out of reach. The child quickly growing disinterested and tugged again for Adam’s attention. “Daddy—-“

“Surely you jest? Forgetting about one of MY plants, Adam?” Adam gave a knee jerk reaction; missing the pod and nicking his own thumb with the tip of the blade. “Fuck—-!” “Ohhhh! Is that a new swear?” “SHUT UP!!”

“Daddy…?” Cain’s small voice pulled Adam back to focus. The man attempted to turn away and play ignorant when his hand was abruptly seized. Adam didn’t dare watch as something long and wet engulfed his bleeding thumb. Provoking familiar shivers to travel down the length of his spine. “Cain—“ Adam’s throat tightened, trying to fight through erratic hammering of his own heart. His body still a vibrating echo of his last lingering whispers.

He sobered only upon seeing the frightened look of Cain’s eyes. Wet pools of familiar violet, strikingly confused and helpless compared to their predecessor. Cain’s attention flickered back and forth between Adam and his suspended hand left aloft. Like Eve, they never seemed to see what Adam could see, but always seemed to just know. “Of course…”

The phantom purred like a cat against Adam’s palm. Burning lips tracing from the wound as they slowly migrated up to the delicate skin of Adam’s wrist. Scaring and calluses seeming only to entice him further with the introduction of pointed teeth. “I only allow you to see me..”

“Cain…. Take the knife and head home, okay?”

What was the difference if his body were to pay for ‘blessings’ now compared to later? At least this felt more of his choice. Before there had been the spear. Then the knife. And now there was only himself.

“Nooo—! Daddy—-“ Cain shock his head, his hands returning to cling to his furred belt. His bottom lip quivering not to cry while Adam’s heart steeply sank. But the fractures Eve’s revelations had left behind had embittered him enough to sharpen his stance. “I knew you’d be a good father-“

“Do as I say Cain. Everything we’ve collected, take it back to your mom”.

“But da—“

Adam cut off the child off as he yanked the male-shift satchel from around his shoulders. The light weight to their scavenging only added to his resolve as he shoved it into Cain’s arms. All expect for the cocoa beans.

“Like most things, these are only for us…”.

The intricate scarring along Adam’s back flared up into a sensation just short of burning. Like the arms that circled his neck and the presence of lips that taunted his senses dispute Adam’s repeated diversion.

“I told you, Adam; you should worry more about yourself~”

Cain took the knife from Adam though both knew it would do little. Reluctantly accepting the his orders if only to tamper Adam’s nerves. Both welcoming the illusion of comfort as a father nudged his son back from which they came.

From the infringing tree line, another tall silhouette could be vaguely seen. Pale and encompassing as she waited patiently. The purrs only grew louder in Adam’s ears while the human fought the compulsion to scream.

“I don’t know why you keep rejecting to having more children. You know our deal would extend to them too”

Adam couldn’t stand to watch that ‘woman’ take Cain’s hand. Only now turning his eyes to narrow upon his grinning companion. As helpless to them as he was to the land that seemed determined to kill them. The idea of dragging more children to suffer the wastes seemed beyond mere cruelty. He scoffed. “You-” he nearly bite his tongue with a laugh. “YOU would like Eve and I to breed—-“

“Absolutely-ducking not!”

The reply was as instant as it was vicious. Causing Adam actually to actually flinch away from the inhuman display of bleeding eyes and lengthening teeth. The width of his shoulders baring the pricking of sharpened claws, drawing just a hinting of blood. But, with a blink of the eye, the moment passed as Lucifer strike a loud kiss over Adam’s cheek. Laughing merrily as he slide off the taller man’s back, all the while tossing the pod sealed beans between his hands.

“You’re right! You’re right!”

Adam continued to say nothing and Lucifer filled the eery space with a laugh. Twirling on a hoof theatrically as he began tossing the pod in a circular motion above his head.

“I should have been more specific in our dealings. Let me make it up to you old friend…”

Violently ripping off its shelled casting with inhuman ease. The gleeful man emanated a boundless strength with every soundless dancing step. The earth rested around him, quiet, submissive and unmoving as though holding its breath. The devil fingered the real seedlings nestled within the shell. Smiling rather proudly as he retrieved one to hold aloof overhead. “Even bitter things can be sweet… let me show you—“

——

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I finished this doodle story out of spite. I know it’s bad. But I finished it. So HIGH FIVE!!

[the-far-bright-center]

'I had a mother who loved me'

(aka, the Jedi Order is NOT Anakin's family)

This is a topic that I've seen discussed elsewhere and I felt compelled to add my own thoughts. I've seen some takes I vehemently disagree with, especially regarding Shmi and Little Ani in TPM, and Anakin's 'decision' to leave with Qui-Gon. It's crazy how some people will blame little Ani for 'wanting' to be a Jedi, yet apparently Luke in ANH is allowed to want this, even though Luke likewise barely knows anything about what being a Jedi entails, and even though it's much more risky (and, frankly, far more unrealistic) to dream of becoming a Jedi in the Dark Times era?? As if a nine-year-old slave-boy wanting to take part in his new-found freedom by learning to be something he associates with heroism means he somehow 'should have known' he wasn’t going to be a ‘good fit’ for the Order. My argument is that there was nothing wrong with Anakin, and there was in fact no legitimate reason for him or ANYONE ELSE to believe he'd not be good at using the Force to help others (which is what the Jedi are supposed to do), especially when he had literally just done so in the pod-race. The whole reason Qui-Gon noticed Anakin was because of how strong in the Force he already was, even untrained. Qui-Gon has faith in him, it's just the Jedi Council that doubts him. Because, unlike Qui-Gon who perceives Anakin's positive qualities and potential, Yoda and the Jedi Council are afraid of him. Because Anakin is basically an 'unknown' (read: uncontrollable) entity suddenly in their midst.

While the Prequels film-canon stands on its own in this regard, we can also look to the novelizations for even more emphasis on this topic. In the TPM novelization, several things are noteable: first of all, even before Qui-Gon arrives, Anakin has had prophetic dreams about becoming a Jedi. And since Shmi is aware that Ani's dreams and visions do often come to pass, when Qui-Gon appears and offers to take him away to be trained, why wouldn't she think that maybe this was somehow Force (or Fate) ordained? And that therefore it was the right thing to do to let him go? And the second thing, is while it's also clear that Little Ani (like Luke!) has a romanticised view of what being a Jedi might be like, his actual motivation for becoming a Jedi is not simply because he 'selfishly' wants to embark on some fun adventure without his mom. On the contrary, every. single. time. little Ani thinks about the possibility of becoming a Jedi or leaving Tatooine, it's directly in relation to eventually returning to FREE his mother and the rest of the slaves:

He was several things in the course of his dreams. Once he was a Jedi Knight, fighting against things so dark and insubstantial he could not identify them. Once he was a pilot of a star cruiser, taking the ship into hyperspace, spanning whole star systems on his voyage. Once he was a great and feared commander of an army, and he came back to Tatooine with ships and troops at his command to free the planet’s slaves. His mother was waiting for him, smiling, arms outstretched.

and

He gazed skyward, his mother's hand resting lightly on his arm, and thought about what it would be like to be out there, flying battle cruisers and fighters, traveling to far worlds and strange places. He didn't care what Wald said, he wouldn't be a slave all his life. Just as he wouldn't always be a boy. He would find a way to leave Tatooine. He would find a way to take his mother with him. His dreams whirled through his head as he watched the stars, a kaleidoscope of bright images. He imagined how it would be. He saw it clearly in his mind, and it made him smile.

Anakin wants to escape slavery and train as a Jedi so he can come back and continue helping his friends and family on Tatooine. So he can return to free the slaves. Little does he know that he won't be allowed to do that... :'(

It's important to note as well that at this point, Anakin *also* has no idea that, as a Jedi, he won't be allowed to get married and have a family. Even though he is already naively imagining himself someday marrying Padme. So he doesn't know that not only will he not be permitted to return for his mother as he'd always hoped, but he will also technically not be allowed to even have a family of his own even when he's old enough to do so.

And what of Shmi's thoughts on Anakin becoming a Jedi? At the start of the AotC novelization, she is trying to be happy with the thought of it, but ONLY because she believes he must be living his best life as a Jedi. She has no idea that he had to go through rejection first before being accepted into the Order. The AotC novelization shows that as Shmi is being held captive and tortured by the Tusken Raiders, she tries to comfort herself by holding onto her imagination of what Anakin's time as Jedi is like:

All those times staring up at the night sky, she had thought of him, had imagined him soaring across the galaxy, rescuing the downtrodden, saving planets from ravaging monsters and evil tyrants. But she had always expected to see [Ani] again, had always expected him to walk onto the moisture farm one day, that impish smile of his, the one that could light up a room, greeting her as if they had never been apart.

Heartbreakingly, as Shmi is being brutalised to death, she clings to the hope that her beloved Ani's life is now better than it was before, and that it was worth saying farewell to him all those years ago, even while simultaneously desperately longing to see him again.

As an aside, it aggravates me to no end that *cough* certain parts of this fandom perpetuate the idea that Shmi is just some blank, wholly selfless entity with no wants or desires of her own. That she's the ‘perfect’ example of a Jedi with no 'attachments' (aka an Old Order Jedi), and that somehow Anakin is a just a 'failure' compared to her. Yes, it could be argued that Shmi is shown to be a better or truer 'Jedi' than most of the other Jedi in the story (aside from Luke in RotJ), but guess what that would mean in that case? (Hint: it has to do with love and family.) Because first and foremost, Shmi is a MOTHER who is trying to do the best for her son, even though a piece of her heart is always missing while he is gone. The AotC novelization shows repeatedly that she tries to assure herself that she did the right thing by letting Ani go, but the human mother side of herself also cries out for him and misses him desperately. She might have let him go in TPM, but in AoTC she wants to see him again. In fact, she believes strongly that she will see him again (because she loves him and he’s her hero because she’s his mom and she trusts he will eventually come back to find her), which is the only thing keeping her holding on until he arrives. How can Shmi be a perfect example of an Old Order Jedi when the motivating factor for even her most selfless actions is her personal FAMILIAL attachment to and unconditional LOVE for Anakin?? Also, how insulting is it to claim that Anakin is a 'failure' in comparison to his 'wonderful, perfect mother', and then proceed to place all the blame on him for being said 'failure'....when he was shown on-screen to be doing just fine in taking after his mother prior to his time in the Jedi Order????

As another poster noted elsewhere, Shmi Skywalker is the only person responsible for the truly good person Anakin Skywalker was.

This is the heart of the entire saga. Anakin's True Self is good because of his mother. Because of how she raised him (to be selfless and to want to help others) and because of the unconditional LOVE she had for him. It was the Jedi Order that failed to provide that for Anakin, and Sidious who manipulated the situation to his advantage.

(And if Shmi was the only person who truly solidified Anakin's inner goodness, then Qui-Gon was the only Jedi who was presented as being equipped to bring out the best in Anakin when Shmi wasn't around. The only one who was prepared to act as an openly warm and compassionate parental figure to Anakin, the only one who could have properly mentored Anakin and helped him navigate both his Force powers as well as the Jedi Code, and the only one who was shown to be willing to stand up to the Council on Anakin's behalf. The tragedy is not that Qui-Gon found Anakin or even that he offered to take him to train in the Force. Rather, the tragedy is that Qui-Gon is slain in the Duel of the Fates, which leaves Anakin without a true protector and advocate in the Order, and allows Sidious an 'in'.)

So the idea that the Jedi Order is Anakin's ‘replacement family' is simply not true—certainly not in the way the story actually pans out. It's telling that, in the original Prequels-era EU, Anakin ran away from the Jedi Temple multiple times. That is NOT the behaviour of a happy child. (It is, however, typical behaviour for children who are struggling in institutionalised care.)

And indeed, the very first paragraph of the AotC novelization opens with Anakin dreaming that he is part of a warm, loving family:

His mind absorbed the scene before him, so quiet and calm and...normal. It was the life he had always wanted, a gathering of family and friends—he knew that they were just that, though the only one he recognized was his dear mother. This was the way it was supposed to be. The warmth and the love, the laughter and the quiet times. This was how he had always dreamed it would be, how he had always prayed it would be. The warm, inviting smiles. The pleasant conversation. The gentle pats on the shoulders. But most of all there was the smile of his beloved mother, so happy now, no more a slave. When she looked at him, he saw all of that and more, saw how proud she was him, how joyful her life had become.

Why would Anakin be dreaming longingly of being part of an openly loving, happy family if he already had that at the Jedi Temple? (Tellingly, he notes that this seems like something normal, as if he's aware that it ought to be commonplace despite the fact that it's currently missing from his own life.)

And later on, when he's visiting Padme's parents' house for dinner, he sees this exact type of scene he's been longing for play out right in front of him, and he wishes that his mother could be there to enjoy it, too:

Anakin took a good helping of several different dishes. The food was all unfamiliar, but the smells told him that he wouldn’t be disappointed. He sat quietly as he ate, listening with half an ear to the chatter all about him. He was thinking of his mom again, of how he wished he could bring her here, a free woman, to live the life she so deserved.

Note that Anakin is thinking about his mother, and putting her first in his mind. He can barely enjoy the meal while he believes his mother could be out there, suffering.

Later on as he and Padme are heading to Tatooine to search for Shmi, they bond over the fact that both their mothers told them the same nursery rhyme ('home again to rest'). It means a lot to Anakin that he can bond with Padme over this similar childhood memory. (No doubt something he would not have had in common with his peers in the Temple, since their only childhood memories would have been within the Jedi Order, rather than in a true home. And certainly not with a mother.)

Finally, we get to the RotS novelization. Yes, THAT one. The one in which we see that Anakin was perfectly willing to walk away from the Order the minute he returned from the war and discovered Padme was pregnant. Willing to walk away to start their FAMILY together. But then his nightmares began, and he reluctantly stayed just a little longer, thinking the Jedi (whom he originally joined with the express intent of wanting to help his loved ones) could offer him some solution to the horror his nightmares were showing him:

If not for his dreams, he’d withdraw from the Order today. Now. ...Let the scandal come; it wouldn’t destroy their lives. Not their real lives. It would destroy only the lives they’d had before each other: those separate years that now meant nothing at all.

To drive the point home, we also have the pivotal scene where Obi-Wan—speaking on the Council's behalf—tries to convince Anakin to spy on the Chancellor. Their exchange says it all:

"He's my friend, Obi-Wan." "I know." "If he asked me to spy on you, do you think I would do it? You know how kind he's been to me. You now how he's looked after me, how he's done everything he could to help me. He's like family." "The Jedi are your family." "No. No, the Jedi are your family. The only one you've ever known. I had a mother who loved me."

Anakin's story breaks my heart because all he wants—all he has ever wanted—is a family. Not to just to 'have' one in a vague sense, but to be PART OF ONE. He wants this, because even when he was slave living an unfree life, at least he had his mother. At least he could feel his mother's love, and could openly demonstrate his love to her in return. For Anakin Skywalker, being a Jedi was never the goal in and of itself. In his mind, it was always primarily a means to save those he loved. To save his family. This is simultaneously the most tragic and the most beautiful thing about his character. It is both his fall AND his redemption.

And those who insist on ignoring Anakin’s deep-seated longing for a family and want to act as though he should just be content with the Jedi Order instead are willfully missing the entire point of his story.

[localfanbaselurker]

I’m watching Voltron: Legendary Defender for the first time and here is what I have had to say per each season (this is 1-2) (3-4) (5-6) (7) (8)

Pre-Watch Knowledge

->big transformers type robot

->pretty alien girl that looks like princess yue from A:tLA

->they are the epitome of color-coded characters

->space??

->there was crazy people in the fanbase that sent cupcakes laced with something to the creators

->queer baiting (this one in particular got me)

->klance.

->^honestly I only knew that because people were comparing it to zukka and I wanted to check it out

->my friend really likes it

Post S1 thoughts-

->that cliffhanger was crazy imagine they weren’t renewed for a s2

-> i went on tumblr after and youre telling me they made that show IN TWO YEARS?? EIGHT SEASONS. IN TWO MF YEARS?? that is insane. props to the writers bro they fr must of known what they were doing.

->all of these characters already scream “doomed by the narrative”

->my fav characters are pidge and lance

->I definitely did NOT expect yue Allura to be British

->bonding moment.

->^like yeah okay i get it now

-> the healing pods are a very interesting concept. Like, what if you get some ailment that it doesn’t recognize?? Do you just die??

-> genuinely felt so bad for Not Yue. Allura. Allura when they had to remove her father’s memory thing. Like yeah I know the castle was corrupted or wtv but bro imagine. Your entire race is dead. your mom, who you previously knew alive is now most likely dead. You already had to go through losing your father once, and now you have to lose him again. Any sliver of hope you had of staying connected with him is gone, because the entirety of his essence is now gone. She’s stronger than me, I would have never given him up so easily. I admire that about her.

->I also made the horrible mistake of going on ao3 after

yk for gits and shiggles… and when I go to a new fandom I always search by hits to see the classics first yk

…

WHY are you guys so 𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓴𝔂… I genuinely shed a tear what. I was flabbergasted to say the least.

On that note the top 23 were about redguy/blueguy getting smoochy-smoochy with each other so I guess that should be a hint as to what you guys like

->the description of the show says the robot (voltron) is operated by “five teenagers” but that shiro guy has to be AT LEAST 25. He is pushing 30 you can’t convince me otherwise.

->for now it’s kinda giving atla except the war is intergalactic and lasted 10,000 years instead of 100.

->all the other characters seem to have a pretty clear background, but we haven’t yet heard about Keith’s backstory, so I want to know (I know now, this was my initial thought)

->shiros backstory/ptsd is very interesting, lots of angst possibilities i see

-> I had an inkling that pidge was…genderly different. (At first I thought she was transmasc)

Post S2

-> WHERE is my man. Where did he go.

-> Pookie please come back. Now. It’s not a suggestion.

->KEITH BACKSTORY I PREDICTED THEY WERE GONNA SHOW US YAY I LOVE BEING RIGHT

-> he’s galra! Soooo much whump opportunity

-> the whole “Allura doesn’t hate you she’s just a little upset to find out ur part of the race that killed off her entire peoples and family and okay maybe she does hate you” scene with keith and hunk is really giving that scene in atla: the southern raiders where zuko thinks katara hates him and sokka reassures him (badly) while he was just trying to get laid w suki.

->^ that’s gay

-> the aliens they met are going to be very important, aren’t they?

->^ oohhh so this is where the “langst” stuff comes from? he’s just kinda insecure i think, but it can’t possibly just be this episode that has that tag so high, unless flanderization is just really popular with you guys, but already suspect that unfortunately

->^Allura high key ate with this

->the “Blade of Marmora” people are definitely gonna be important later

-> the mall episode was soooo fun! fav s2 episode for sure!

->^gay. It’s literally giving “two bros chillin in a hot tub. five feet apart cus they’re not gay”

-> I know of 2 ships now. klance and allurance. I only see the former though, the latter seems more like a running gag/unrequited crush thing (for now i suppose)

-> Coran is an icon. I love that whimsical man. he’s beekeeping age per say.

-> I need pidge to find her brother and father man I feel so bad for her PLEASE DOBT TELL ME THEYRE DEAD ILL LITERALLY DIE.

-> pidge is sooooo cool i love her so much she’s literally the pookiest of the pookies

-> Who tf is gonna be the black paladin now. Keith sure as hell isn’t ready for that. maybe Allura?? Cus yk she kinda already leads them a little bit

These are thoughts I had compiled over a while now. I am on S5E3 as of now (07/03/24) but I wanted to document my thoughts either way. I will post on the tag “laura’s first vld”

[lola-bunn1]

The moon and the sun

Chapter one - Uturu.

a/n: this is a mini series i decided to start! i hope it turns out good, enjoy!

The moon.

You've always been fond of the moon

The moon hid behind the sun. Everyone always favored the sun over the moon, it was a bundle of sunshine, a sun was always thought of as a symbol of happiness, as the big star, outshining everyone and everything.

Nobody could compete with the sun, after all.

☽-☼

You sat by the shore, watching the fish swim around

"Y/n!" A voice called

You turned to see Tsireya walking to you

"Sister, I've been looking for you!" She said

"Is something wrong?" You asked, getting up

"Mother wants you" She said, you nodded with a light smile, taking a deep breath as you headed to your family's marui pod

You walked in to see your mom muttering to herself, a look of disappointment on her face, as usual

"Mother?" You said, she turned to you, "You called for me?"

She sighed, "Didn't I tell you to give these to the families living the northern side? You know it gets cold for them." She said, pointing to the baskets filled with blankets and scarves she knitted herself

"Sorry mother" You were quick to say as you grabbed the basket and left the marui pod, going to homes in the north

As you walked, you noticed something flying in the sky, it wasn't that far, but it looked like it was getting closer

You dismissed it and finally got to the marui pods, the families thanked you as you handed them each their own basket, you simply smiled at them and headed back home

When you got there, you saw everyone crowded around something, some people made way for you to see what's happening. You furrowed your eyebrows as you saw a couple of people that looked odd.

Well, not odd, but they were clearly not from this clan. Forest people, you assumed based on what you've learned about the other clans and what they looked like

One of them caught your eye, he stood next to a slightly shorter boy, his hands open to show that he means no harm.

"Uturu?!" Ronal, your mother, excalimed, suddenly snapping you back to reality

"Yes, a sanctuary for my family." The man standing in front of you said

Your father, Tonowari looked to Ronal and back to the man, "We are reef people...you are forest people, your skills will mean nothing here."

"We will learn your ways, right?" The man looked to the others and they agreed

"That's Toruk Makto" Tsireya whispered to you and your eyes widened, you were just wondering why he looked so familiar

Why was Toruk Makto coming here to live with the reef people?

Ronal looked at them and walked to the girl who was standing behind her mother, you assume.

She grabbed her arms and raised them, "They are not even true Na'vi!" She exclaimed

"Mom..." The girl whispered, "Yes we are!" She said as Ronal inspected the others

She grabbed the shorter boy's hands, revealing them to the clan, "They have demon blood!" She yelled

You looked at the boy, seeing his uncomfortable state. You felt a little bad for him and how your mother was talking about him.

"Look!" Toruk Makto said, showing his hand that looked the same as his son, "I was one of the sky people now I am Na'vi, we can adapt!" He said

Ronal and Tonowari looked at each other, as if speaking through their eyes. He sighed and turned to them, "Toruk Makto and his family will stay with us, treat them as your brothers and sisters. They will be like babies, taking their first breath. But we will teach them our ways so they do not have to suffer the shame of being useless." He stated to the clan and turned back

"Our son, Ao'nung, and our daughter, Tsireya will teach you their ways." He said as you just stood there quietly

"Come on, what do we say?" He said to his daughter, "Thank you" She answered, the others repeating her words

The family followed Tsireya as she went to lead them to their own marui pod

You followed your mother as she went back home, and grabbed an empty basket

"They're new here so they might not have any important things." She spoke

"Shall I start knitting them some blankets and scarves?" You asked, ready to try and help

"No no, there won't be enough time. It might take days, we'll just have to give them some of ours, and some welcoming gifts" She said, you nodded and began grabbing some items to place in the basket

☽-☼

You walked towards the marui pod, seeing Tsireya smiling as she talked to the shorter boy you'd seen earlier by the shore.

"Hello" You said, a light smile on your face, "My mother wanted to give you these. The Tsahik always makes welcoming gifts for newcomers"

"Tsahik?" The woman said, "You are her daughter?"

You nodded, "Pardon me, I thought it was only Tsireya and Ao'nung." She apologized

"Oh no no, it's alright. People tend to think that too" You said, an awkward silence meeting your ears, "Uh anyway, here are some blankets, some fruits, just a whole bunch of things we think you might need"

"Thank you" A boy suddenly said, your eyes met his, you were quiet for a moment

"Yes, no-you're welcome" You said, leaving

“Wait” The boy said, you looked back to see him getting up, “Mind if I come with you, so you can show me around?”

“I thought my siblings were gonna do that?” You questioned

“They seem busy with the others”

“Uh, alright” You said, he awkwardly smiled and went with you

God was this awkward.

[gloryhrs]

⟡ 𝓒𝐇𝐈𝐋𝐃𝐇𝐎𝐎𝐃 𝓢𝐖𝐄𝐄𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐒 ━━ 「 Shinji Hirako. 」

✿.*･｡ ꒰ black male reader, high school au!, reader & shinji are both 18/3rd years in highschool, delinquent! shinji (he smokes weed & is a lil mean lol), shinji & hiyori are related, smut (?) at the end idk, shinji is also extremely obsessed w/the reader (real), ah this took me so long (∩´﹏`∩) i don’t know if i’m going to keep it up for long, click 4 art creds! ꒱

ʚɞ ˚୨୧⋆｡˚ SHINJI Hirako, 10, wiped the imaginary sweat from his brow. Today is the day he confesses to his best friend, Y/n L/n. His mother and yours had been good friends since high school, which explained why you and he were like two peas in a pod, having known each other since infancy. Shinji couldn't have asked for a better best friend than you; you both slept over at each other's houses daily, played video games, watched horror movies, and snacked on sweets all weekend. When you spent time with him, his heart began to race, his palms sweated, and his cheeks turned a vivid shade of crimson, indicating that he had strange feelings for you. Because of your kindness and the way you care for him, his affection for you grew stronger by the day. His younger sister, Hiyori, used to mock him and label him a coward for not being able to express himself to you, but that will change today!

When he spotted you walking out of the classroom with Kensei and Love, aka your bodyguards, he tightened his grip on the small box of chocolate and flowers. Instead of standing in the center of the hallway, he carefully worked his way up to the youthful group of boys. He observed as you stopped chatting to the boys and focused on him walking, making him much more nervous than before. "Hi, Shinji!" You smiled and waved at your blonde-haired best friend, who looked like he was about to pass out. Kensei and Love turned to look at the sweets and flowers in the boy's hand. He handed the flowers and chocolates out to you with his head lowered before any of them could say anything. "H-Hi Y/n! Please go out on a date with me! You’re the coolest, kindest, and sweetest person I’ve ever met! I promise you won’t be sorry!" His voice cracked at nearly every word, leading Kensei to cover his mouth to stifle the laughter. Love sighed and turned his head in the opposite direction, attempting to erase the scene he just saw.

When Kensei began to snicker at him, you frowned and lightly smacked the back of his head. "Shin, don't be so shy; I've known you for years. And, of course, I'll go with you!" You took the box and flowers from his hands as the dumbbells on his shoulders rolled off with ease, which meant his nervousness was disappearing. He quickly got up and straightened his posture with a bright smile on his face. Before he could form his next sentence, a set of lips that belonged to you brushed across his cheek. Making him lose all sense and turn as red as a tomato. "We should ask our moms to take us to that new arcade you talked about!" You told him as he nodded mindlessly with a silly grin on his lips. "Yeah, we enjoy arcades." His voice cracked once more, this time making you giggle. Both Kensei and Love curved their heads to the side as they witnessed the sight. "Oh, brother! Look for a classroom." Kensei fake gagged as Love sighed, realizing beforehand that this blossoming relationship was most likely going to be a problem in the future.

ʚɞ ˚୨୧⋆｡˚ AND Love was completely correct. If he believed Shinji was in love with you in elementary and middle school, he had no idea what was in store for him after everyone entered high school. By this point, everyone knew Shinji was obsessed with you. From having your name tattooed on his forearm and finger to having your initials pierced in his ear, having you as his lock screen and home screen, and owning an I Heart My Boyfriend shirt somewhere in his closet, he's got it all. He's also your biggest fan! From his frequent appearances at your games, he is usually the loudest one in the bleachers, holding a poster. Being the one to carry you and your belongings when it's time to leave, as well as ordering takeout for you and him for the night. Shinji was the greatest boyfriend! No one could tell you otherwise. Most classmates assumed you threw a spell on the blonde, but it turns out he was just in love.

The sound of laughter was the only thing that could be heard from the janitor’s closet. The laughter belonging to you and Shinji, who dragged you in there the moment he saw you in the hall. "Shin, we’re going to be late for class." You murmured as your boyfriend proceeded to kiss your lips, ignoring the fact that not only you would be late but he as well. The small space of the janitor's closet is causing him to press you against the wall, with him lifting your thigh till it reaches his waist. "It doesn't matter if you don't turn up. Plus, I missed you." His pierced tongue dragged across your soft, ebony skin while his lips whispered into the crook of your neck. You ran your fingers through his soft golden hair. "I've missed you too, which is why I'm here. So that I can see you." You sighed. This is what happens when you separate yourself from him for longer than a day. He’ll turn into a baby crying for its mama.

"I barely see you now because you've been so caught up with volleyball and those damn club activities. I thought you forgot about me." He scoffed, his gaze now fixed on yours. You've participated in almost every club and sport since the first year of high school. That's why you were so popular. You gently smiled as you placed both hands on his cheeks, bringing him in for another kiss. "You know I can never forget about you, baby. Plus, I'm free today. This week, Rose, Lisa, and Love are in charge of the clubs. And I don’t have practice until next week." You grinned while playing with his several ear piercings, your initials dangling from his right lobe in gold and diamonds.

Shinji's eyes instantly lit up as he flashed his well-known smile, displaying his gorgeous pearly whites. "And yes, we can finally play that new street fighter game you were talking about." You pecked his cheeks as he buried his face into the crook of your neck, getting a good whiff of your scent before signing. "Mhmm, I love you. Also, you smell so fuckin' good. Like freshly baked cookies mixed with cocoa butter. It makes me want to eat you." He murmured, never letting his smile go. His sweet but strong aroma invaded your nostrils as you chuckled and buried your face in his shoulder. "I love you too, Shin. You smell like vanilla cupcakes with a hint of weed. Which you most likely smoked during lunch." He laughed and drew his face away from your neck. You could read him like a picture book. "Oops." He gave you his signature smirk, his hands trailing from your waist to one of his favorite parts of your body.

"Shin, don't let them find you smoking on school grounds. They almost sent you to detention for three months the last time you were caught." You scolded your partner, who was rolling his eyes. Because of that wet floor prank he committed in his first year, which resulted in the principal injuring his back, the staff were utter jerks to him. "Keyword, almost! My wonderful boyfriend bailed me out and convinced them to shorten my sentence." He kissed your cheek, and because you were one of the school's favorite students, you persuaded the administration to ease up on your nutty boyfriend's punishment. They eventually reduced his sentence from three months to one week of cleaning duties.

"But in all seriousness, I’m so lucky you’re my boyfriend. Everything about you is so perfect that sometimes I wonder what would’ve happened if I hadn’t confessed. Just looking at you drives me insane." He whispered, now placing his hands on your ass and gently sucking on the flesh with his lips against your neck. You sighed and tilted your head back, feeling yourself fall into his trap but swiftly snapping out of it. "Shin, don't start again." You bit your lip to keep the stream of noises from coming out, knowing that if you made a sound, he wouldn't stop. He groaned, "Oh, come on. If we stay a little longer, I can show you what else my tongue piercing can do." He ran his hands up your button-up shirt, making you shiver under his cold fingers. You felt your cheeks become hot at the sentence; you knew him for over a decade and still couldn’t get used to his flirtatious demeanor.

"Maybe later, but we have to go now." You pulled away while adjusting your black-framed glasses. It takes some time for the burning sensation on your cheeks to fade away. Shinji followed behind as you opened the door, which revealed the familiar set of teenagers. Shinji put his arm around your shoulder and glared at the group, specifically Ichigo. Ichigo rolled his eyes, and Orihime waved as Uryu and Chad turned their heads away from the couple. Keigo's cheeks flushed a deep scarlet, his mouth dropping from pair. He was undoubtedly thinking negatively. "Eh? What the hell are you guys doing outside the door waiting for?" You whacked Shinji's arm as he swore at the gathering of first-year students. Ichigo scoffed at the man with blonde hair who stuck his tongue out and stuck the middle finger from behind your head.

"Are you blind? We're here to put these supplies up! But, of course, you're absent from class!" The Kurosaki argued back with the third year, who was grinding his teeth together, trying to keep back a torrent of vulgarities and insults. "What on earth were you two doing in the closet?" Keigo asked, his curiosity (and nosiness) getting the best of him. "What did you think we were doing?! Picking fucking daisies?!" He snapped at the youngster, who shrieked and hid behind Chad. Keigo's eyes widened as his cheeks blushed again, putting two and two together. You sighed and pinched your boyfriend's cheek, inflicting pain on him. "I'm sorry about him. We're already late, Shinji, so let's go." You waved farewell to the teens and tugged on his arm as he followed, not before turning around and flashing the middle finger at Ichigo, who quickly returned the gesture.

"I can’t believe L/n-san is dating someone like him." Ichigo grimaced at the sight of the male, who grinned and pulled you closer to him while giving multiple kisses to your lips, not caring about the students walking by. "They’re so cute! From what I heard, they’ve been in a relationship since elementary school!" Orihime squealed at the couple, and Keigo's mouth dropped to the floor. Elementary school?! He remembered when all the girls ran away from him on the playground. How could someone like you date a delinquent like Shinji? "Huh?! Is that why he’s so obsessed with L/N? I wish someone loved me like that." Crocodile tears streamed down his face as he looked at the couple. "Maybe because you’re a weirdo." "WHAT?!"

"Babe, why did you do that." Shinji massaged his reddish cheek while pouting. "I warned you about cursing at the first years, Shin." You just stated, as he sneered and rolled his eyes, this wasn't his first time in trouble for yelling or cursing at a group of students. He still remembered how the majority of them accused him of insulting them, which resulted in him being thrown in detention. "Are we going to your house today?" You changed the subject because you didn't want to hear his complaints. "Yeah, my mom is working the night shift, and Hiyori is staying at Mashiro's. So we can have as much fun as we want." You didn't have to look at him to notice the type of smile he wore as he leaned into your ear.

"You’re right, we can have fun all night." Your fingertips brushed against his exposed collarbones as you moved your hand up his chest. "But if you could just do one thing for me, please." As your hand moved to caress his cheek, you grinned. Shinji nodded while becoming utterly hypnotized. "If you don't make any more trouble today, I'll give you anything you want." Your minty breath fanned over his lips as your lips brushed against his. Shinji nodded his head again after taking a quick look at your lips. Knowing that the only way to persuade him to behave properly is to bring something to the table, you hummed and pulled him into a kiss.

ʚɞ ˚୨୧⋆｡˚ "FINALLY, I'm done." Shinji sighed as he ran his fingers through his hair. He clicked the x to close each tab while complaining. He put the joint to his lips while leaning back on the headboard and proceeded to doze off while gazing at his roof, the music playing from the speakers lulling him into a trance. When he heard the bathroom door open, he turned his attention away from the roof and watched as you emerged from the room wearing just a shirt. His eyes studied your physique, revealing just how much those workouts altered your body. You chuckled at your partner, who was virtually stripping you down with his eyes, when you heard the wolf whistle from across the room. "Nice thighs, babe." He smiled at you as you took off the shower cap from your hair and showed him your h/c locs, which were no longer pulled into a ponytail.

"Thank you, baby. Did you finish your homework?" You slipped into the bed as he blew out the smoke, his half-lidded eyes peering back into yours. "Mhmm, now come sit on my lap." He patted his lap with the same grin on his face. When you got into his lap, his hand grabbed your waist and pulled you closer until your chest touched his. Shinji's half-lidded eyes scanned your features; your beautiful e/c eyes were enough to put him in another trance. Not to mention how your h/c locs and the golden jewelry swayed with every movement you made. In his eyes, no one was as beautiful as you. "My boyfriend is so pretty." He muttered, his hand resting on your thigh and letting the flesh seep through his fingers. "Mine is too." You beamed, your hands running past his tank top to feel his toned chest.

"Gimme a kiss." He grinned and placed the joint on the tray, now gripping your ass with both hands. You wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling him in. Once your plump lips met his, he pushed his tongue past your lips. Allowing him to explore the damp cavern, the subtle taste of bubblegum toothpaste lured him closer. He groaned when he felt your ass against his clothed cock. From the way you rocked back and forth on his lap, you were completely aware of what you were doing. "Mhmm." You moaned when he began to rock your hips against his rising boner; his mouth completely absorbed the rest of your sinful sounds. When he pulled away from the kiss, you whimpered while he grinned and gently pushed you down onto the mattress. The blonde took the joint and pressed it to his lips, chuckling at his boyfriend, who squirmed on the mattress. "S–Shin please." You called out to your lover as you rubbed your thighs together, yearning for friction since he had stopped.

Shinji put the stick down and crawled between your legs after deciding to listen to your pleading. "Please what baby?" He sucked on your neck with a sideways tilt of his head and a smirk on his lips. The smell of brown sugar drove him to lick and suck every area of your neck, and he could feel himself growing drunk on your trademark scent. When you wrapped your legs around his waist and yanked on his golden locks, he let out a moan. "I-I need you right now." You exhale, the cold metal on your skin making you quiver. Shinji chuckled and drew away from your neck, exposing the dark marks he'd produced on your flesh. He bit his lip and placed his fingers around your neck as he felt himself becoming harder at the sight. His slim fingers gripped the sides of it, causing you to choke on your moans.

"So pretty." He muttered as he removed your shirt, exposing your beautiful dark brown skin. His fingertips skimmed across your beautiful skin before brushing against your nipples, causing you to tilt your head back. "A little sensitive, aren’t you?" He questioned, his thumb and index finger rolling over the sensitive bud while sucking on the other. "O-Oh, Shinji." As he continued to suck on the delicate flesh, you fisted his hair when he tugged on the bud before flicking it off with his tongue. Shinji rutted his hips against yours once more after hearing you say moan his name countless of times. "Shin, p–please kiss me." You exhaled through the moans as he lifted his head from your chest, smirking as he observed your dazed expression.

When his lips made contact with yours, he pushed past your luscious lips. As he groaned against the warmth of your lips, his hands explored your thighs once more. He couldn't get over the smooth tenderness of your lips, no matter how many times he kissed you. His saliva tasted like the sweets he had recently eaten. You both kissed each other as though one of you was going to vanish at any moment. You whimpered as he broke away, missing the feel of his lips. His lustful gaze returned to your needy ones. When he noticed you pouting, he sucked his teeth. "What exactly is it now?" He sighed. You were always so damn whiny when you got worked up. "Can you take your s–shirt off? Please?" You pulled on the fabric that covered his torso, concealing the other tattoos as well. Shinji's eyes softened, and he said, "Of course, baby." He yanked off the tank top and tossed it across the room.

He witnessed as your eyes sparkled at the sight of his chest, your fingertips brushing against the tattoos on his torso. "Do you like what you see?" He teased you as you nodded mindlessly, your gaze fixed on his chest, notably his nipple piercings. "Take off your pants, too." Shinji raised an eyebrow when you spoke to him. What? The way you talked to him gave the impression that he had already fucked your head up. He took both of your hands and pinned them above your head, making you squirm at his gaze. "What's the magic word, sweets?" He asked, his other hand clasping around your neck once more. You poked your lips out while making your infamous puppy eyes at him. "Please?" You tilted your head, giving it a more innocent appearance.

"Good boy. You won’t be needing these anymore." He slapped your thigh before tearing your underwear off, causing you to gasp as cold air hit your cock. When he reached down to the waistline of his sweatpants and teasingly tugged at the fabric, you bit your lip. Shinji laughed again when he heard your whining. "Please, hurry up." You whispered, your mouth watering. Shinji finally decided to stop his taunting and removed his sweatpants and underwear. "O-Oh my," you spoke unconsciously, leaving you in awe of his glory. His gaze moved down your body, stopping on your member that begged to be stroked. "Would you take a look at that? Someone is quite eager." He teased, making you cover your face with your hands.

"Don't look away, baby; let me see that pretty face of yours." He pulled your hands off your face and repeatedly pecked your lips. Even though this wasn't the first time you had seen Shinji naked or stripped off in front of him, it always made you shy. Before taking you and his cock and holding them in one hand, Shinji gave you one final kiss on the lips. His hands felt so amazing on yours that you softly moaned when they made contact with your erection. You both made a series of moans as soon as he started moving his hand. The unfamiliar sensation was like bliss. "Shit, this felt better than last time." Shinji cursed as he watched the gorgeous look on your face transform into unbearable pleasure. From the looks of it, this was going to be a long night for you both.

© gloryhrs, 061623. — notes and reblogs are appreciated! (≧∇≦)

[glittervame]

It's shit.

This is the most random shit. Don't mind it <3

Heartbreak High x Oc! Reader, it's a teen drama you know what to expect

Pt. 2

I met Harper and Amerie when I was five years old, I had been dropped off by my mom, and my curls bounced behind me as I walked through the door being met by the sight of a girl with brown hair pointing at a picture that was on the blond girls' paper.

"What's that?" even if you weren't looking at her face you could tell that she was judging immensely, I walked up table peering over her shoulder.

"It's a crocodile" The blond blinked up at them, then frowned looking back down at her paper.

I narrowed my eyes as I tried to imagine the animal I looked at the green blob, "It's shit" being brutally honest, knuckles bumping the ones of the girl next to me in a fist bump. We both grin at each other as the blond across from us flips us off.

We've been best friends ever since.

.·͙*̩̩͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩̥͙　✩　*̩̩̥͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩͙‧͙ .

Nothing could ever come between us, like three peas in a pod, we've always been each other's ride or dies.

"One, two, three!" I count off as I clutch onto both of their hands as we jump into the pool. All three of us giggle as we splash each other as much as we can.

My skin was with a permanent swimsuit tan after that summer, it didn't go away until snow started falling and it just reminded me of how much fun I have with my friend.

.·͙*̩̩͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩̥͙　✩　*̩̩̥͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩͙‧͙ .

Harper and Amerie started getting super into romance, I said it was because they didn't have their own lives but they just shook me off accusing me of being a hater. Honestly, I thought it was amusing until they did it all the time.

I was trying to find myself during the time, I started experimenting with a lot of different things, currently standing at my locker with the girls I was trying to match my left eyeliner wing to my perfect right one when they started mimicking the couple across from us.

"I swear to God, Jessica, you know I'm good for it."

"If you touch her again I'll f*ckin' smash ya, ya cheatin' dog."

"No babe, I'm f*ckin'..."

"Kiss me."

When they started making kissing noises, I had to walk away.

.·͙*̩̩͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩̥͙　✩　*̩̩̥͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩͙‧͙ .

"Amerie. Hello?" I snap my finger in front of her face trying to get her attention.

Harper groans, "Amerie! Stop staring at Dusty, you're obsessed."

"It's fucking weird and you look like a stalker" I add, scrolling through my Instagram feed.

"Destined" Amerie sighs, "I just don't get it" She looks at said boy longingly before I smack her on the back of her neck, "Ow!"

.·͙*̩̩͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩̥͙　✩　*̩̩̥͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩͙‧͙ .

"Honey, we're home!"

I raise my head from a lap when I hear Amerie's voice carried out through the quad and blink owlishly at the girl as our eyes meet.

A snicker comes from my right as my pillow slides off the wall and walks over to the girl, "Missing your fourth witch?" He laughs.

Amerie's nose scrunches, "Piss off, Spider" she snaps.

The blond clutches his heart dramatically, falling into his best friend's arms, "Ooh!"

I watch as Dusty walks over to the girl making small talk, I walk up as the girls start giggling and walking away, not even paying any attention to the fact that they had just bumped into Quinni.

"What a pick-me bitch. Also rude" Darren companies

"Maybe they didn't see us?" Quinni questions obliviously, looking after the girls.

"Oh, please. Check the material" They gesture to themselves, "We are beautiful, exquisite jellyfish"

"Glittery, glowing jellyfish" I chime in walking up to them.

"Amithest!" Quinni pulls me into a hug and Darren gives me a one-over, "What are we doing, going back in time?" They point at my black and white outfit.

I sigh dramatically, "It's all that fits me right now" placing a hand over my heart.

"You can't sit with us!" Darren playfully shreaks, crossing their arms over their chest, turning away.

I was about to retort when something caught my eye, "Ooo, fresh blood" I said looking at the new boy up and down.

Darren's lips parted as they were about to sit something, I'll never know what it was because someone started yelling.

"Oi! There's a fully-gacked sex map in the old stairwell!"

"Out of my way, you shits" I huff as I struggle against the crowd, I shove a guy out of my path causing him to fall into his friends, whispers forming around me, I look up at the map my mouth agape in aw, "What in the kid's helpline?"

It was a map of everyone who fuck everyone, a girl's name had a little note that read 'Couldn't walk for three days' I snorted at that, "That's true" Someone chimed in pointing at it.

"Cum queen!" A guy cheers from the back

I could hear Spider reading things off of the wall, "Jenny got fisted!" he clapped a guy on the back, Jesus "Mary's a good screamer-"

"We already knew about that" I chime in and he pushes my face away from him with his hand, "Dam check out Sasha's body count" He points. Dusty's mouth is agape as he looks at it, "Oh my god, what?" I giggle at his face before turning at the sound of a commotion.

"You scissored Greta Bathgate? Before or after we broke up?"

"I don't remember."

"You don't remember?"

"I'm pretty sure we were on a break, but... Wait, Missy."

"Nah, I need space, man."

"Oh shit," I let out a gasp, I elbow Spider in the ribs as he started laughing pointing to a name on the wall, "Dude, Darren jerked you off? Nice bro, you into dudes?" He wraps an arm around Ant, "A little cheeky, huh?"

Darren sharply turns around, "Who said I'm a dude?"

"Quinni, lazy kebab," a boy said somewhere from in the crowd.

Quinni came up beside them and started talking, but Amethyst didn't hear her she couldn't hear anything over the ringing in her ears as she looked at the map, and alas she had found her name on the map.

Amethyst ─── Bisexual ⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒

                                                                ↳

                                                                                     Ant

                    Missy

[horansqueen]

Dating For Dummies - 1

❤ Story Masterlist

❤ Notes:

written from both Opal & Niall's POV

i don’t proofread, I never do, I hate it.

AU comedy/fluff/smut/romance

1.7k

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OPAL

The neighborhood was not as quiet as I had expected, but for the monthly price we were asked for this new apartment, I couldn't really complain. I let myself fall on the overly comfortable couch Niall's mom had offered us with a satisfied sigh and a big smile on my lips. The room was almost empty except for a few boxes placed between old furniture friends and family didn't want anymore, and I had to admit that the colors of the walls were horrible, but at least, it was my home. It was our home.

I couldn't pretend Niall and I were not close, but I couldn't also say that we were like peas in a pod. We came from the same group of friends, and we did spend some time together, but being alone was not something common for us. I liked him, I knew he was the kind of roommate that wouldn't be too invasive and he was quite nice to look at too, I couldn't deny.

He slowly sat next to me, leaning his arm on the back of the couch behind me, and crossed his ankles. I didn't need to look at him to know he was as excited as I was to start this new life.

"Finally free." he let out in a low tone, making me chuckle.

"Yea I bet you were so oppressed living with you mom." I let out with sarcasm in my voice before letting out a chuckle. I turned my head to look at him and shook my head slightly. "Poor darling." I added, sliding my fingertips gently on one of his cheeks, his stubble scratching my skin lightly.

He raised his eyebrows and turned to look at me to, making me smile even more.

"Why do I have the feeling that this amuses you more than it should?"

I leaned closer and licked my lips before grinning even more. "Because it does." I whispered, letting out a laugh louder than I expected.

He rolled his eyes but the way the right corner of his mouth moved up told me he knew I was joking. It took a few seconds but silence finally came back between us and I blinked a few times, watching as the sun slowly moved down, adding an orange color to the cloudless sky.

"Okay, how about I take care of the tv and we can watch a movie?"

I was the one raising my eyebrows this time, pleasantly surprised by his offer. I had expected Niall to spend time by himself most of the time, or at least not with me, and perhaps it was just because it was out first day and he didn't want to be alone. I quickly nodded without making any comment or asking any questions and he jumped off the couch to do what he had suggested.

It took him about 15 minutes and everything was ready, which is another thing that surprised me. It made me realize that I didn't know much about him and perhaps it was simply because it was new, but I wanted to get to know him better.

We had met through the friend of a friend and although we would all meet up for beers at the pub on saturdays and study together once every two weeks, it never occurred to me that Niall was someone I could get along with. Not because he was not interesting, or because we didn't share the same interests, but just because I had never taken the time to think about it before. The only things I had really noticed about Niall was that he was hot, funny, popular, and that he was way out of my league. Not that I wanted him that way or anything, but it was a simple fact. I was also aware that he could definitely hold his liquor which was not something I could pretend was my forte, but I always stopped drinking before being too drunk ; you never know what can happen in a bar and although I loved my friends, it was hard for me to trust anyone. But that's an other story for an other day.

I knew I shouldn't but in the middle of the movie, I glanced at Niall's phone, noticing he was getting many notifications through the evening. My mouth curled again into a grin when I noticed he was actually swiping on a dating application.

"Ae you looking for the kind of love that lasts forever, or the kind that lasts only a few hours?"

"How's that any of your business?"

My heart jumped in my chest but when my eyes met his, I realized he was joking and I smiled back at him.

"It's not, but I'm on the same app. In fact, I'm on thee different apps." I admitted, leaning my head against the couch for a few seconds before bringing it back up, slightly ashamed of myself. "Hey that's what happens when you spend all your time working on other type of relationships, and making sure you get excellent grade in college."

"Yea, you keep telling yourself that, love." he chuckled, shaking his head.

"And what's your excuse?" I asked, half-joking, half-insulted.

He stared at me a few seconds as if he was trying to find a good answer and finally shrugged. "I'm tired to date girls who only love me for my looks."

I laughed shamelessly. "Someone is delusional."

"Yes, you." he argued. "Do you really think you can find a decent guy on these apps?"

"The self-burn is strong."

His face went from a frown to annoyed and ended up making a grimace. "Oh shut up, Pal."

"This is the most horrible nickname I've ever been given." I pointed out. "And yes, I still have hope to find someone worth my time on these apps."

I was not sure I really believed it was possible but I really wanted it to be. It really seemed like it was the only thing missing from my life.

"You should focus on just getting some." he shrugged. "When you don't expect anything, you can't be disappointed."

I knew it was a lie, everyone was expecting something, whether they wanted to admit it to themselves or not, but I didn't say anything about it and only shrugged.

"Okay, I have a date tomorrow night." he pointed out, turning to me and sending me a smile so big I could see his teeth. "And she looks like a gem."

I moved his phone so the screen would face me and my lips parted very slightly at the sight of a gorgeous brunette in a very tight dress, holding a pink drink with a tiny umbrella floating in it. That girl, unlike me, was totally in his league.

"She may look like a gem but who knows if she is."

He shrugged, unbothered. "I guess I'll find out tomorrow."

"Admit it." I pressed after a few seconds of silence, turning my whole body his way and bringing one of my legs up on the couch. "All you care about is getting laid by pretty girls. The word 'serious' never qualifies the word 'relationship' in your world."

"I've been in serious relationships before, what about you, smartass?"

My eyes roamed in his face, trying to find out if he was lying but I just licked my lips. "Yes, I have."

I didn't want to get into depth about my past romantic relationships and I had the feeling he didn't want to share details about his either.

"You want to know what I think?" he finally asked, turning his body to face me too.

"No."

"I'll tell you anyway." he stated quickly.

"How surprising." I mumbled, rolling my eyes.

"You've been so hurt before that you're scared of falling in love again." he speculated. "That's why you never go on dates with anyone on these apps."

"How the fuck would you know that?"

"Prove me wrong, then."

We remained like that, face to face and in silence, just staring at each other. I could feel my heart beat hard against my rib cage, trying not to give in. After all, I didn't have anything to prove, not even to my new roommate, right?

"Fine!"

I quickly grabbed my phone and typed on the screen as fast as I could, hitting 'send' before I could change my mind. I had been talking to a guy for a few days and he was the right candidate to meet, or at least pretend to meet. After all, I could always tell him I changed my mind and Niall would never find out.

"There." I turned the screen his face, bringing my phone so close to his face he had to back away a little to be able to read.

"He replied."

My heart skipped a beat at his words and I tried t swallow the lump in my throat. Shit, I hadn't expected a quick answer. I looked at the screen and held my breath when I realized he had written a time and a place to meet up. I could always back off and cancel, but that would mean I would have to admit that Niall was right ; I was fucking scared to fall in love again.

"Great. See? We both have a date tomorrow night!" I didn't know how credible I was but at least I was trying.

"I was kidding, Opal, you know it, right?" he asked with concern in his voice.

Once again, my eyes roamed on his perfect face and I shrugged very lightly. "I know."

I suddenly felt very stupid for thinking this little banter was more serious than it really was, but at the same time, it was a relief. I didn't want Niall and I to be on bad terms and somehow, I felt like we could become close friends and for some odd reason, I really wanted it.

"You don't have to go on a date with anyone, you have nothing to prove."

Oh and why not? I didn't know if I was ready to be with someone again but one date couldn't be that bad… right?

[dirtytransmasc]

“You can not ask this! The children, the forest, OUR SON! Everything! This is our home!” Neytiri yelled, Spider song chord in her hands as it fell when he was taken just hours ago.

“I DON'T WANT TO LEAVE EITHER NEYTIRI! THEY TOOK OUR BOY BUT I'M NOT LETTING THEM TAKE OUR OTHER CHILDREN! He had them under his knife and he got away with our Spider...” Jake's head faced down to hide the tears on his face. “ I failed our son, but I will not fail my people. As long as we stay here the more they are in danger, the more our children are in danger. He took one of us. Please I don't want him to take any more.” Jake covered his hands with his eyes trying to stop the tears from falling. Neytiri stood there grasping what she had left of her son before she started to cry again herself. Not knowing their other children are watching and feeling helpless about their brother.

I'm gonna make this so much angstier then it needed to be, and I'm gonna enjoy it.

neytiri felt sick; the chord had broken during the fall and all but a few beads had been found. she had gotten onto her hands and knees, searching the forest floor for the lost beads but to no avail; the bead for his first hiss, the first test of iknimaya he completed, his first hunt, and his adoption of all things. part of her baby's story was missing, the most important parts, to her at least. she had made the decision to adopt him, she was the first to hear him hiss, she was the one to lead his first test, she was the one to take him on his first hunt. she had lost her boy, she was losing her home, the home she raised her child in, and she could do nothing. she couldn't even hold onto his song chord, recite his song, his life, in its entirety, because it was gone.

She had tried to busy herself restringing it, but the gaps made her feel nauseous. now she fiddled it in her fingers as jake and the kids started to pack up their things to leave.

jake tried to speak to her, the kids kept trying to nuzzle up to her, but the grief of the situation made her freeze up. she tried so hard to answer, to ease her children's cries, but she couldn't.

"mom," it was kiri, "we'll look in the daylight, before we leave, we'll find them I promise. but, we need to pack his things, and... I can't do it alone. we can't take it all, you should decide what we bring to our new home, what will wait for him when we get him back." she spoke with a sense wisdom that proceeded her age, sounding just like grace.

she finally stood, unable to look her heartbroken child in the eye, before turning to his section of the pod; she finally cracked, balling her eyes out as she begin to shift through his things. the blade, now too small for him, she carved when he was only a few years old. the jewelry he helped make with her, his nimble fingers making intricate designs with ease. the weaved blanket she had made him the night after she first met him to replace the old scratchy one they had on hand in the lab. what remained of her child was right there in front of her.

kiri shifted under her arm, holding onto her torso, practically holding her mother up until she could get her to sit again. as they went through spiders things, packing up what was most important, both functionally and sentimentally, jake returned for wherever he had been.

she turned to look at him, and found anger boiling under her skin; she knew he was doing what was best for their family, but she was still enraged by his request to leave everything.

she didn't let him speak, cutting him off as he tried by gently releasing kiri before storming out of the hut, brushing past him, shoulder checking him before slapping him with her tail.

"I go, kiri can finish packing his things... I will say goodbye to my home now," she bit at him, not yet ready to accept her fate, not without a fight.

she needed air, she needed to find those beads, she needed her son's story back in her hands before her mate pried her from their home.

[zoandreez]

patch up my heart ୧┈┈•༶

pairing: lo'ak x metkayina!reader (honestly it could be any type of reader but for medicine sake you're metkayina)

summary: lo'ak is always getting into fights, it's a given. but sometimes, you can't heal every wound.

word count: 1.3k

warnings: angst, fluff resolve

a/n: this took me like a hour to come up with

translation for neytiri's songcord:

i expierience neteyam,

(and) great mother within me.

you brought light,

new life, a new son.

joy within my heart,

joy within my heart.

you were the upcoming tsahik, so you were the best in your clan when it came to healing aside from your mother. it was really nothing special in your mind, but you were glad you were a good healer as your boyfriend lo'ak always got hurt.

he visited almost every day, whether it was a gash on his stomach, or a black eye from fighting with ao'nung again. and every time, you took him in to take care of him. you couldn't help it.

"again?" you sighed as he walked into your marui.

"again!" he said in the same sarcastically cheerful manner he did every time. you smiled at him as he sat down. he didn't look seriously hurt, which was good. "it's nothing too serious, i just wanted a reason to see you."

you watched as he rubbed off some war paint, and revealed a little (but deep) cut on his arm. you examined it for a moment before grabbing some yalna bark. you ripped it open, revealing a small amount of liquid in the back before you folded it and poured it on his arm. he hissed slightly, reacting to the cold concoction poured directly onto the blood.

"let that sit for a moment," you said before getting up and walking to the other end of the pod as he eagerly got up and followed you, unaware the liquid was now spilling out of his wound from his vertical stance. "now- lo'ak!" you groaned, grabbing his hand and pulling it up horiontally.

"i told you to let it sit for a reason," you scolded.

"sorry, just wanted to see what you were doing." lo'ak said, pulling you into a hug with his free hand. you couldnt resist and hugged him back, placing a kiss on his cheek before walking him back to where you were before.

you used a small piece of wet cloth to wipe his cut, and saw the red fade to a pink as the blood stained the cloth instead of his skin.

"okay, you're done."

"thanks!" he beamed as he pulled you into a hug, planting you a kiss on the lips and leaving the pod. he wasn't allowed out much with the sky people here now, and the amount of trouble he's been in, so you assumed he was just going back to his pod.

after a couple hours, you heard shouting in the gathering area. you quickly ran to the commotion and saw your family cheering and yipping as jake attempted to calm them down.

"hey, what's going on?" you ran to ao'nung.

"the sky people killed r'oa." he said, eyes filled with the familiar anticipation of war you had seen before.

you fell silent for a moment. mom's spirit sister? you looked over and saw her screaming and yipping along with the rest of the clan. all of a sudden, jake held up a device. it was orange, and beeping. it had a spear on the end of it.

"you tell the tulkun.. if they're hit with this they're marked for death." jake said, hesitantly but with a tone that said he had no other choice. almost the exact second he said that, the people you had known your whole life started diving into the water.

you looked around and saw neteyam screaming. "lo'ak no!" you heard the name and instantly looked over to neteyam. "he wants to go to payakan!" tsireya said, diving after him. you yipped for your ilu and went to follow him.

in the far distance, you saw lo'ak, calling for payakan.

"come back!" tsireya said, full of worry. you saw kiri and tuk on another ilu, and saw tuk point to him before kiri dove after him as well.

"lo'ak's going to find payakan!" neteyam said, worried. he was the closest to him, and wouldn't let him get caught by the sky people.

"wait up!" kiri shouted.

suddenly, the sea was filled with a wail. you looked at tsireya, before nodding. it was payakan, and lo'ak seemed to have realized that before the two of you did.

"payakan! brother!" he shouted when he heard it. payakan popped out of the water, before falling right back in.

"what is it, what's wrong?" he said, before seeing the familiar clicker. "shit!" he quickly turned to the rest of the group before hopping off his ilu and climbing onto payakan, struggling to pull off the marker.

"stay calm," he repeated. the rest of the group swam over, and quickly saw the ship. he cursed under his breath once again before turning to neteyam. "bro, come on, help me out! hurry, the ships coming!"

neteyam, ao'nung, and tsireya quickly climbed onto payakan trying to pull off the marker. "call it in!" neteyam said, and lo'ak looked at him with a confused expression. "call dad, just go! do it!"

he quickly got up and pressed the mic on his neck. "dad, i mean devil dog, do you read me? it's evil eye, do you copy?"

"yeah, lo'ak." you hear jake, barely over a mumble, but you could tell his tone was filled with worry.

"dad! we're with a tulkun, it's under attack." lo'ak said, but you could barely hear him over kiri and neteyams shouts to pull harder. you and ao'nung were pulling out, as tsireya and neteyam pulled up. "killer ships inbound. it's about two clicks out."

"who's with you?"

"it's all of us, ao'nung and tsireya too. we're at three brothers rocks."

"you get to cover and you do not engage. alright? you hear me? do not engage, we're coming."

"yes, sir."

"it's getting closer!" tsireya shouted, as they counted down to the final pull. finally, the clicked popped out of payakan, and he swam away from lo'aks orders. the group split up, and you followed kiri, ao'nung, and roxto.

you rode your ilu through the water, splitting as the groups stayed close together holding on to each other and swimming through seaweed pockets. you quickly got away, and hid in the kelp forests with kiri.

there was a moment of calm, and you couldn't help but worry for the rest of them. you floated with kiri, ao'nung and roxto closer behind. suddenly, a submarine came crashing, and you weren't sure how she did it, but kiri slammed a plant into it. you looked at ao'nung, who was just as confused as you are.

eventually, the four of you swam away. you, ao'nung, and roxto swam to shore. you were back on the island, seemingly the only ones. "is everyone okay?" you began, examining ao'nung and roxto. you paused for a moment. "wheres kiri?"

you looked around, before falling silent.

you had no clue what you had just saw. the explosions, the fire, the ilu, the tulkun, the war. you were silent for a really long time. you were silent even when the sully's came back, missing a family member. neteyam was there, just.. lifeless.

you sat in your marui alone for a really long time. suddenly, lo'ak trudged in. he had a limp, and collapsed onto the floor, falling to his knees and looking you in the eyes. you were eye level with him, and said nothing as he pulled you into a hug.

"hey, lo'ak. how are you feeling?" you said, a bit deadpan, but as sympathetic as you could.

"you cant fix what i want you to." lo'ak said, voice hoarse. he coughed, his throat dry, evidently so in the way it sounded.

"and what is that?"

lo'ak hesitated for a moment before he spoke. "when i saw him.. when he died, i held his blood in my hands. and i saw it as mine. a piece of my heart, my soul, got ripped out as eywa ripped his life from him. and i know you can't bring it back..

"so just stay here. please."

you had no words for what he just told you. so instead, you stayed silent, and held him.

in the far distance, you heard neytiri singing her song cord. you said nothing as he cried louder, and she sang.

lie si oe neteyamur,

mawma sa’nokur mìfa oeyä.

atanti ngal molunge,    

mipa tìreyti, mipa ’itanti.

lawnol a mì te’lan.  

lawnol a mì te’lan.  

a/n: im not the worlds best angst writer because i've never written angst in my life so just take that