#just was using the notes i took for this btw
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arcane characters breaking up with you x fem reader
characters: viktor, jinx, vi, caitlyn, jayce, ekko, silco, mel and sevika.
writer's note: gosh i loovee drama i'ts so spicy and fun! btw i cried a lot with ekko's... anyways request are open, darlings ;)
reconciliation link:
alternative sad final link:
Viktor
The laboratory was shrouded in a deep silence, the kind of silence that feels heavy, as if the air itself was dense, pressing down on your chest. The light from the screens flickered in the darkness, casting shadows that moved with the rhythm of the science Viktor had created. He was there, motionless in front of the table covered in blueprints, his head lowered, as if struggling with something he couldn’t share.
You stood there for a moment, watching him in silence, waiting for him to break the silence, but something in his posture told you he wouldn’t. The distance between you felt greater than you could bear, and the knot in your stomach grew heavier with each passing second. Finally, you couldn’t take it any longer.
“Viktor…” Your voice trembled, but you forced it to sound strong. Every word felt like a challenge to your own fear. “What’s going on?”
He didn’t look at you, but his shoulders tensed. The sigh that escaped his lips was full of something you couldn’t recognize. It wasn’t frustration, nor exhaustion. It was something worse, something you already feared.
“You don’t understand, do you?” he finally said, his voice low but clear. “I can’t stop now. This is bigger than us. I can’t lose what I’ve been building. The machine… the transformation… It’s the only way to save myself, to save us.”
A cold shiver ran down your spine. It couldn’t be. You were sure you must have misheard, but the words kept echoing in your head like a drumbeat. It wasn’t just about science. It wasn’t just his obsession. Viktor was pushing you away. And the pain, the pain was unbearable.
You stepped forward, your heart pounding in your throat. How could he do this to you?
“Is that all I am to you?” Your voice was a whisper, but the venom of desperation was there, cutting through your words. “An obstacle? Something you have to leave behind? All this time, everything I’ve done for you… And this is what I get?”
Finally, Viktor looked at you. But it wasn’t the look you expected. His eyes, so cold, so distant, weren’t the eyes of the person you had known. It wasn’t the Viktor you had protected, the one you had loved. It was someone else, someone who no longer saw in you what they once did.
“I do love you, you know?” he said, his voice broken, as if the words were becoming harder and harder to say. “I love you more than you can imagine, but this… this is bigger than us. This is the future, and I can’t risk losing it because… because of something as small as my own feelings.”
The words came out of his mouth as though they were the only thing left inside him. And you, standing there in front of him, felt the ground crumbling beneath your feet. The pain, the betrayal, cut through you like blades.
“And what about us, Viktor?” you said, unable to stop the mix of anger and sadness in your voice. “What about everything we’ve shared? Everything we’ve been through together? Doesn’t that mean anything? Nothing to you?”
He took a step back, each word he spoke a wall being built between you two. With each word, you felt smaller, more invisible. As if he had already made his choice.
“I can’t go on. I can’t be the person you need. If I stay… if I stay with you, all of this… everything I’ve built, everything I am, will crumble. I can’t be that person anymore.”
The pain overwhelmed you in an instant. A silent sob began to rise, but you didn’t let it escape. The knot in your throat tightened, but the words couldn’t come out anymore. You felt empty, as if the air you were breathing was the same air that had killed everything that once meant something to you.
“Then, goodbye, Viktor.” Your words were a broken whisper. “I can’t wait for you to choose between me and your obsessions. I won’t stay here, watching you lose yourself in something you don’t even know what it is.”
Viktor didn’t say anything more. There was no attempt to stop you, no plea, not even a look of regret. Just the sound of his breathing, shallow, as if something inside him was breaking too, but it was too late.
The door slammed shut behind you, the sound of the wood ringing in your ears. And Viktor, inside, remained alone with his experiments, his machines, and the man who had decided that everything else had to go.
Jinx
You approached her softly, as you always did, trying to calm her, trying to make her focus on you again. But you knew this wasn’t the same Jinx who used to laugh and be unpredictable. Something in her gaze told you she had gotten lost, that her thoughts were no longer hers, that the chaos in her mind had taken control.
Suddenly, Jinx stopped moving. She stood still, staring into the void, and everything around her grew quieter. Then, she began to murmur, as if speaking to herself, but her words weren’t clear. You grew concerned, stepping closer, but that was when her body reacted violently, out of control.
You didn’t understand what was happening until you felt the sting of a blow. You hadn’t seen it coming, but the pain hit you instantly. In that moment, fear took over, and your body trembled as you tried to comprehend the magnitude of what had just happened. Jinx looked at you, but her eyes weren’t focused on you. She was trapped, lost in a hallucination.
The voices started. “Kill her! She’s going to betray you, Jinx! Kill her before she leaves you!” The voice was cruel, disdainful, so cold. And then, another voice, softer but equally terrifying: “She hates you. She doesn’t want you, Jinx. Let her go before you do it again!”
You froze, watching the confusion in her eyes, the terror on her face. This wasn’t her. This wasn’t the Jinx you knew. She was caught in an internal struggle, a battle that you couldn’t fight for her.
You stepped closer to her, despite the blood dripping from your nose and your trembling hands. Jinx was crouched down, her eyes lost in an empty space, her hands covering her face as if she could hide the pain and chaos she had just caused. But you knew you couldn’t run from this. You couldn’t leave her now. Not after everything you’d been through together. And not after the promise you made to her.
“Sweets,” you whispered, so softly that you weren’t even sure she could hear you. “Please, look at me.”
Tears kept falling from her eyes, but she didn’t see you. Jinx didn’t see you. And the blow she had struck you moments ago seemed like a distant memory compared to what was happening now: the emptiness she was feeling. The war in her head.
“I’m sorry… I’m so sorry…” she whispered, her voice broken, shattered. “I didn’t want… I didn’t want to hurt you. I can’t… I can’t do it again. I… I hurt you.”
You knelt in front of her, searching for her eyes, feeling the knot in your throat. But she wouldn’t look at you. She was trapped. And you knew what that meant.
“Wake up, babe,” you said firmly, taking her hands. “I promised you. I won’t leave you. Not now, not ever.”
The voices in her mind began to rumble, like an overwhelming wave, growing louder, rougher. “She’s going to kill you! Kill her before it’s too late! It’s best for her! Do it now!”
“No… no,” Jinx said, covering her ears as if she could silence them. “No… I’ll hurt you… I don’t want to lose you! I swear I don’t want to hurt you, but I’m a monster!”
You stood up, forcing Jinx to look at you, taking her by the shoulders. “You’re not a monster. You’re not, Jinx. I promised you I wouldn’t leave you. I promised!”
But Jinx started sobbing, with a desperation so deep it hurt to see her like this. “You… you don’t understand. I’m the cause of all this. I’m the worst for you… It’s going to hurt so much if I stay close. You’re going to die! I’m the reason why you…”
“No!” you interrupted, gripping her hands tightly. “Don’t say that. I’m not leaving. I need you. You’re the only one who… who has understood me. Don’t leave me. I promised I’d be by your side.”
Jinx pulled away from you with a sigh, her face filled with guilt and desperation. “You deserve something better, something… more. You don’t have to stay. You don’t have to put up with my madness, you don’t have to stay for me.”
“I don’t want to be with anyone else!” you shouted, desperate. “You’re what I want. You’re what I’ve always wanted. Don’t leave me!”
But Jinx walked away, her steps wavering but firm. “I can’t… I don’t want to be the cause of your death, the cause of… the worst. You’ve given me everything, you’ve given me more than I deserve, but… you could be happy without me. I’m a burden, a curse. And… and I don’t want to lose you more. I don’t want to kill you.”
The voices in her mind grew more intense, more cruel: “Do it! Let her go, Jinx! She’s better off without you.”
“Wait!” you screamed, your eyes filled with tears. “You’re not a burden! I love you, Jinx, I love you! I promised I wouldn’t leave you alone, and I won’t leave you now!”
But Jinx’s words were clear, heartbreaking. “You… you’d be happy without me. I’m the reason for all the pain, for everything that’s made you suffer. And if I stay… I’ll hurt you, I’ll always do it.”
Jinx took a step back, her heart breaking inside, while you kept holding on to her. “I’m leaving. Because… because if I stay close, I’ll do the same thing as always. And you… don’t deserve that.”
“No,” you whispered, your voice broken but determined. “I need you. I need you, Jinx.”
But she was already so lost in her own mind that she couldn’t hear you.
She looked at you for a long moment, her eyes filled with guilt and sadness, and with a painful sigh, she turned away. “I’m sorry… I swear. I’m so sorry.” And in that instant, she left you behind.
Vi
When you enter the house, the sound of Vi limping towards you makes you take a step forward. You stay still, observing her wounds: a black eye, swollen lips, blood still dripping from a cut on her arm.
"Vi," you begin, anger taking over you, "You can't keep doing this! I can't see you like this! For a few damn coins? I can pay for everything you need, whatever you want, you don't have to do this!"
Vi shoots you a glaring look, her breath heavy from the effort, but her pride intact. "What do you know, huh? What the hell do you know about sacrifice? About fighting to survive, about having no other option but to fuck yourself over to get more than scraps?"
"You don't have to fight, Vi. You don't have to risk your life like this, for a few damn coins. I can give you whatever you want!" you shout, tears threatening to spill, the helplessness making your voice tremble. "I don't want you to hurt yourself for pride! I want you, and you're killing me seeing you like this!"
Vi takes a step back, her look as hard as stone. "I don't need anything from you! No money, no help! I can take care of myself, do you hear me? I'm not your damn fragile doll, I'm not your entertainment! I'm not your fucking fun."
"It's not that! It's not fun, I care about you, Vi! I can't stand seeing you destroy yourself over something so stupid!" Your breathing grows more ragged, your heart pounding hard in your chest. "I don't want you to keep destroying yourself for pride!"
Vi laughs bitterly, her tone cruel. "You think you're the only one who knows what it is to suffer? You think just because you're some princess from Piltover you can judge me for what I do, for what I am? You've never had to fight for anything in your life! You were born in a fucking silk bed, surrounded by luxuries, and you don't know what it's like to live in the shit, in the mud of Zaun."
The poison in her words hits you like a slap. "Why do you judge me like that when you know it's not true? I've told you, I want to help you, get you out of this shitty life that's consuming you."
Vi takes another step back, her eyes full of disdain. "And what, now you want to make me your project? Your experiment? A poor girl from Zaun who can throw her whole world away just so you can feel better about yourself? Is that what you want? To have a 'girl from the slums' story? I bet you'd get bored of me! Of me and what I am!"
Your words choke in your throat, the truth of her accusations ripping through the air between you. Vi keeps staring harshly, stepping back again. "I'm not what you need, and that's it. I don't want you to be my savior, I don't want to be your fucking project. I'm not going to stay here, waiting for you to cure me, to turn me into something I'm not."
"Vi..." you whisper, tears now falling uncontrollably from your face. "Why... why are you doing this to me?"
"Because we don't have to be together. If I stay with you, I'll just kill you too." Vi takes one last step back, and her voice softens, but not enough to stop the damage. "I don't want to be your fun anymore, I don't want to be your damn experiment. I want you to be happy, to live your life. Far from me."
The silence says it all. Vi turns around, and before you can say anything else, she leaves, leaving you alone in the cold space, with only your tears and her broken words remaining.
Caitlyn
The light in the cell is dim, the coldness of the place surrounds you as you stand there, completely in shock. The shackles on your wrists are a brutal reminder of what just happened. You can't believe it. Caitlyn, the woman who showed you love, the one you thought would never hurt you, has left you here, between these cold and dark walls.
The door creaks open, and there she is, Caitlyn. Her face, usually full of compassion and determination, is now empty, almost indifferent. You watch her approach, and for a moment, you hope she'll come to free you, that she'll tell you it was all a misunderstanding. But no.
"Why?" you manage to say, your voice broken with pain. "Cait... do you really think I could betray you?"
She doesn't answer immediately. She just looks at you with eyes full of conflict, her face serious, even cold. The tension in the air is palpable, and you can see the internal struggle in her. Finally, she sighs, and her words come out of her mouth like a sentence.
"I don't know," she replies coldly. "You're under suspicion now. I can't let you escape."
The weight of her words falls on you like a stone. Your heart stops for a moment, and a lump in your throat prevents you from speaking. You can't believe what you've just heard. The woman who swore to protect you, the one who shared your bed and your laughter, now accuses you of being a traitor.
"But... I just wanted to bring peace, Caitlyn," you whisper, feeling how despair is consuming you. "How can you think I would do something like that? I didn't want to hurt anyone. I just wanted..." The words break in your throat, and the anguish in your chest is unbearable. "Do you really think I'll be capable of lying to you and cause a revolution?"
Caitlyn closes her eyes for a moment, as if she’s searching for answers she can’t find. "I can't risk it, I can't let what you did go unanswered," she says, her voice harder now. "My duty is to Piltover, to justice. I can't be weak."
You step closer to her, hands outstretched, tears overflowing from your eyes. "Caitlyn, please, don't do this to me... I'm not the traitor you think I am. I love you. We promised we'll always have each other's back. Don't you remember that?"
She takes a step back, and her expression hardens even more. "I'm sorry," she says with a broken voice, but her eyes show no regret. "I'm sorry, but I have to do this. I can't let you remain free, not after everything you've put into doubt."
And before you can say anything else, Caitlyn turns her back to you, her footsteps moving away. "I'll keep you in the cell until everything is resolved," she says without turning. "But I can't trust you now."
The door slams shut with a metallic noise, and the sound of the locks clicking into place is all you hear. You fall to your knees, the anguish overtaking you. All you wanted was to be with her, to do the right thing, but now you're here, a prisoner of a justice you don't understand. The betrayal hurts, not because it was done to you, but because the person you love most has now turned their back on you.
Jayce
The conversation had started calmly, like all the others. But something had changed. The tension in the air grew as the words left your lips, and you could see the discomfort on Jayce's face.
"Jayce, enough," you say, your words full of frustration. "I know you want to do great things, but not at the cost of everything else. You can't keep sacrificing everything for your ambition."
He looks at you, surprise and annoyance mixing in his eyes. "I don't understand what you mean," he replies, his tone tense. "Do you think I'm doing this just for myself? I'm fighting for a better future for everyone."
"You don't see it, Jayce!" you shout, unable to contain the emotion choking you. "You've forgotten about the people who really matter to you. Everything you do is for power, for control, for your image. There's no place for me in your life, no space for what we are."
Jayce crosses his arms, his gaze harder than ever. "Is that what you think? That everything I do makes no sense? I'm trying to save Piltover, build something bigger than us. And what do you want? For me to give you more time to be by your side? For everything to revolve around you?"
The pain pierces your chest like a dagger. "It was never about that, Jayce," you say with a broken voice. "I always wanted to be by your side, support you in what you do. But I feel like a shadow. Like you can never see me, like my life, my dreams, everything I am, isn't enough."
He takes a step back, and the distance between the two of you seems to grow with every word that leaves his mouth. "You don't understand," he says coldly, his eyes now so distant. "What I do is bigger than anything I could offer you. If you can't understand that, if you can't meet me at my level, then maybe we're not what we thought we were."
"What are you saying?" you ask, feeling your heart flip. "Are you telling me that everything we've been doesn't matter? That I'm not enough for you?"
Jayce takes a deep breath, as if trying to calm his own thoughts before speaking. "It's not that. But I'm tired of you asking me to put you above everything I'm trying to build. If that means losing you, then..." his voice cracks for a second, but he recovers quickly. "Then it's what I have to do."
An emptiness opens in your stomach, and the world seems to crumble around you. "So you're leaving me. Just like that, as if I never meant anything to you." You look at him with disappointment.
Jayce lowers his gaze, avoiding your eyes, and his words hit like a blow. "I don't want you dragging me backward. You have to understand, I can't do this anymore."
Tears well up in your eyes, but you don't let them fall. "If that's what you want, Jayce, if that's what you really think is best for you, then goodbye. I hope you don't lose yourself on your way to perfection."
And in that moment, the words between you become empty. Jayce turns around, without even looking at you one more time, and walks away without saying another word. You stand there, in the middle of the place you once considered your refuge, while the echo of his indifference lingers in your ears.
Ekko
The house is silent, but the air is thick with tension. Ekko's gaze, which usually radiated passion and energy, now seems empty, lost in thoughts that don't include you. You watch him from the door, the knot in your throat preventing you from speaking.
"Ekko," you manage to say, your voice almost breaking, "I can't take it anymore."
He looks at you, seeming surprised, but he doesn't approach. The silence stretches between you two, as if you both know what's coming but neither of you wants to say it.
"What can't you take anymore?" his voice is low, as if he's too exhausted to argue. "What do you want me to do, huh? I'm doing what I have to do for Zaun, for everyone here. I can't just stop. I can't anymore."
"Can't stop? Are you really saying that?" Anger begins to take control, and helplessness mixes with pain. "Ekko, I've been watching you disappear more and more into your missions, your plans, everything that keeps you busy in Zaun. And I... what am I to you? A nuisance? A distraction?"
Ekko takes a step back, the exhaustion on his face becoming more evident. "It's not that, but..." He falls silent for a moment, as if words aren't enough to explain how he feels. "I can't keep living in two worlds, in two realities, and you know it. Zaun needs all of me, and you... you don't understand what that means. I can't be the Zaun guy and be your boyfriend at the same time."
"So, all of this was a mistake?" you ask, desperation about to drown you. "Everything we shared? Everything we built? Doesn't that matter? Does Zaun matter more?"
"Yes, sometimes it matters more," Ekko replies, his voice cold, but his gaze betrays him. "You... you're part of my life, I know. But I have to be objective and realistic, and no matter how much I love you, right now, you can't be a priority in my life. I can't be who you want me to be anymore. I can't be the guy who fights for you and for Zaun at the same time. I need to be one or the other, and Zaun needs me now."
"And I need you too," you say, the pain in your words, "but you don't see it anymore, do you? I'm not enough, I'm not what you need. I feel used and stupid," you said angrily, kicking a chair.
Ekko looks at you, his gaze wavering, as if there's an internal struggle he can't win. "Believe me, no one wants this to work more than I do, baby, but I... I'm not capable of giving you what you want, and neither are you to me."
The silence stretches into what feels like an eternity. You approach him, desperation overtaking you. "Ekko, please. Think about it one more time, we can't leave things like this. You've taught me to fight. Isn't it worth fighting for this?"
"Sometimes there are battles that aren't worth fighting because you know you'll never win them," he said, his words burning like acid in his throat. He kissed your forehead and stepped away from your personal space. "I'm sorry..." he murmured, and for a moment, he seemed tempted to hug you, but he didn't. "I'm sorry. But this is what's best for both of us."
The words destroy both of you.
Reality hits you like a bucket of cold water in the middle of winter. Everything you'd feared, everything you'd known deep in your heart, is happening. Ekko is pulling away, and even though you understand, you can't accept that the love you shared is no longer enough to keep him.
"Is this for real?" you ask, tears falling uncontrollably. "Is this what you're giving me? A cold goodbye because Zaun is more important than me?"
"Zaun needs a leader," Ekko replies, his voice broken but resolute. "And I need to be that leader. I can't be what you need, not now."
You stand there, feeling how the void between you grows larger, as Ekko turns and walks away, taking with him the last hope of what once was.
Silco
The rain hit the windows of Silco's office with force, the sound almost deafening as you leaned against the wall, breathing irregularly. You had been rescued again, once more on the brink of death, another attempt on your life, and once again, Silco was there to save you. But something in his gaze, cold, distant, made you fear the worst. You didn’t understand what was happening, but something had changed. Something in him.
“This is over,” he said after a long pause.
“What do you mean by that?” Your voice trembled.
Silco looked at you, his eyes filled with something you couldn’t read, something darker than the usual shadow he carried. He took a step toward you, but his presence was no longer comforting. His gaze remained fixed, as if he was deliberately pushing you away from him.
“It’s for the best,” his tone was low, almost hesitant, but the coldness in his words made you freeze. “I can't keep exposing you to this. You don't belong in this world. I can’t risk you anymore.”
“What are you saying?” Your words barely came out, drowned by the pain of his cold resolve. “Silco… you don’t have the right to decide for me. I choose to stay, I choose to remain here by your side.”
He let out a bitter laugh, shaking his head as he took another step back. “You don’t understand,” he said, his voice deeper than ever. “I don’t want to protect you anymore. You’re a burden, a burden I can’t carry any longer. I’m tired of you.”
The blow was like a stab to the chest. You couldn’t believe what you had just heard. “What? You’re tired of me?” Your words came out choked, unable to grasp the cruelty he had just expressed.
“The rumors are true,” he said with a harshness that froze the air between you both. “I’ve only seen you as a little distraction. A good pet. A weakness. Nothing more. I had fun, yes, but that’s over. I’ve found something better.”
“No… that can’t be…” you said, but when you saw the coldness in his eyes, something inside you shattered.
Silco didn’t respond immediately. His gaze remained fixed on you, and for a moment, everything felt like a lie. Then, with a cruel indifference, he said, “You were never my equal. You were just a pastime, something I could have for myself. Something no one else could have. But you're replaceable. We all are.”
“That’s not true,” you whispered, struggling against the knot in your throat. “How can you say that?”
“I’m getting tired of repeating myself. I don’t want you in my life anymore. You’re no longer useful to me, you only bring me problems,” his voice was now firm, unyielding. “So go. I don’t need any more weaknesses in my life.”
The words were like a sentence. Everything you had ever felt for him, everything you had believed you shared, crumbled in that moment. There was nothing left. With your heart shattered, you took a deep breath and, without another word, turned away.
As you walked toward the door, the echo of your footsteps filled the empty office. Silco watched you, but did nothing to stop you. There was nothing left to say.
When the door closed behind you, silence filled the room. Silco stood there, in the darkness, his fists clenched, the pain in his chest stronger than any wound he had ever suffered before. For the first time in years, a single tear ran down his face. But no one saw it. He was alone, and that was all he deserved.
Mel
Mel's bedroom was silent, illuminated only by the faint light of the early morning hours. The bed, still messy, bore witness to a night of passion, but also to something much deeper that had been growing between the two of you. The sheets, tangled together, seemed to reflect the tension that now filled the space. The room, which had once been a warm refuge, was now soaked in a thick, suffocating atmosphere.
You sat on the edge of the bed, watching how Mel lay with her back to you, her face hidden in the pillow, breathing irregularly, as if she were still searching for something she couldn’t find. It wasn’t physical exhaustion that was affecting her, but something much deeper.
"Mel..." you said, your voice low but filled with an anguish you couldn’t control. “What’s happening between us?”
She didn’t move at first, as if she hadn’t heard you, but the weight of your words finally reached her. She turned over, and when her eyes met yours, something in her gaze made you fear the worst. It wasn’t the look of the woman you loved. It was something much more distant, something you couldn’t understand.
"I'm sorry... I can't keep doing this," she said, her voice, though soft, tinged with a hardness you couldn’t ignore. "I can't keep dragging you into this."
"What do you mean?" you asked, unable to comprehend what she had just said. "I won’t let you push me away. I won’t allow it."
Mel sighed and sat up, her eyes reflecting an exhaustion that seemed to surpass the physical. "It’s not about that... I don’t want to keep exposing you to all of this," she said, pressing her lips together with a determination that hurt. "I’m putting you in danger. It’s not fair to you."
"I don’t care," you replied, moving closer to her, your words heavy with desperation. "I don’t care what happens. All I want is to be with you."
But Mel didn’t give in, and instead of softening, her expression hardened even more. "You don’t understand, do you? I... I’m not enough for you. I can’t be what you need. I can’t keep being this, being... who I am."
"And what are you, Mel?" you asked, pain clear in your voice. "Ambessa’s daughter? The woman who lives under her shadow, trying to be someone she’ll never be? You’re not just that. You’re not. You’re... you’re the woman I want, the woman I love. But you keep running from it."
Mel, hearing your words, took a step back, as if an invisible force had pushed her away. The look in her eyes was painful, as if your words had struck her to the core. "You don’t get it. You don’t know what it’s like to be Ambessa’s daughter," she said, her voice cracked with frustration. "You don’t know what it’s like to do everything for her, for her approval."
"No I don't," you replied, unable to hold back the heat of your own truth. "But what I know is what it’s like to try to be what others want. To try to please someone who’ll never see you for what you truly are. And still, you stay there, looking for something you can’t even define."
Mel fell silent, her face paling with each of your words, but you wouldn’t stop. Not after everything you’d tried. "I’m telling you, I don’t care what you do. I don’t care if you have to live under her shadow forever. I just want to be with you. But you... you can’t see that you’re losing what matters most. What you have left. What we could be."
"It’s just that I can’t... I can’t give it all up for you," she whispered, her gaze lost, almost disoriented. "I’m not enough for you. I can’t be."
"Why do you keep saying that?" you said, your voice breaking. "Why do you keep seeking her approval? You don’t have to be her perfect daughter, Mel. You have to be you. But you keep seeking her love, and you’ll never find it. It will never be enough for her. And as long as you stay there, you keep losing yourself."
She closed her eyes, as if your words pierced her, but she didn’t say anything more. The silence between you two became unbearable, and finally, Mel looked down, tears welling up in her eyes. "I’m telling you, I can’t keep going with you," she murmured, and this time it wasn’t a doubt, it was a statement.
You stayed there, frozen, unable to move a muscle. "What?" you whispered, unable to believe what she had just said.
"What I’m saying is that... I can’t keep being what you need. I can’t be happy like this. I can’t keep fighting for something I don’t have."
You couldn’t believe it, the words slipped from your mouth, but they didn’t find the right form to come out. "But, Mel, you don’t have to be what they want. You don’t have to live under her shadow. Why don’t you see it? I don’t want you for what you are to others, I want you for what you are to me."
Mel looked at you then, and for a moment, you thought everything could be resolved. But the look in her eyes wasn’t the same anymore. It was empty, sad, as if she had given up everything she once was. "I can’t stay here, I can’t keep doing this," she murmured, and with those words, she turned away, walking away from you.
Your heart shattered, but it wasn’t the pain that stopped you. It was the anguish of knowing that, despite everything you shared, she would never be able to leave that shadow, that need to please her mother.
And as she walked away, the words echoed in your mind over and over again: "I’ll never be enough. I’m not enough for her. I’m not enough for you."
Sevika
You find yourself with Sevika in her usual spot, where the world seems to stand still, surrounded by ruins and rubble. The atmosphere is thick with silence, but there's something in her eyes you can't ignore. There's tension in the air, as if a conflict is about to erupt.
"Sevika," you call, your heart racing. "We need to talk."
She turns toward you slowly, and her eyes seem colder than you've ever seen them. "I know," she replies, her voice deep and cutting. "I've been waiting for you."
You approach, but Sevika's gaze feels so distant, so detached from you. Something is wrong, and you know it. You can't stop the doubts from forming in your mind.
"Why have you been pulling away from me?" you ask, the knot in your throat growing tighter. "What's happening between us?"
Sevika crosses her arms, her posture more defiant than ever. "Don't you know? I told you, remember? I'm no good for you. I'm not what you need."
You furrow your brow, confused. "What are you talking about? I've never asked you to be anything else. I accept you as you are. I love you, Sevika."
She takes a step back, distancing herself from you, as if your closeness burns her. "That's what you don't understand. You think this is love, but what you're seeing isn't it. What you see in me is just an illusion. I'm just using you to get what I need: a little comfort, a distraction from the damn chaos of this city. But I don't want you to keep deceiving yourself. I'm not someone you can save, and I don't want you wasting your time with me."
Your words catch in your throat. "No... don't say that. I'm not deceiving myself, Sevika. I want to be by your side, through thick and thin. Why are you saying all of this?"
Sevika laughs, but it's not a laugh that gives you peace. It's cold, bitter, as if she's laughing at a cruel joke. "Because you're weak. And I don't want to drag you into this shitty world anymore. I don't want you to be another victim of what I am. And the worst part is, you don't even get it. You're a dreamer, an idealist, but there's no room for that here. There's no room for love in Zaun, there's only pain. And you won't be able to handle it."
"I don't want to leave you. I can't leave you," you respond, moving closer, but Sevika takes another step back, her face hardened by an internal battle. "I can't live with the thought of you pushing me away."
"Well, that's what's going to happen," she says, her voice so cold it echoes through the emptiness of the factory. "I'm leaving you because I can never be what you expect. I'll drag you into the darkness, I'll sink you even deeper than you already are. And that, that would ruin you. I have nothing left to offer you."
You're frozen, the pain piercing through your chest. "No... don't do this, Sevika. Please. Don't leave me alone."
"I left you the moment I accepted this damn world," Sevika says, and you can see a single tear silently roll down her face. "The only thing I offer you is more suffering, and that's the last thing I want for you. Forget me. And go, before I end up destroying you."
"No! I won't leave you!" you shout, but the desperation in your voice is futile. Sevika looks at you, but there's no warmth in her eyes anymore, only emptiness. "You're going to be happy without me. I'm not the person you need."
Before you can say anything else, Sevika turns around, walking toward the exit of the factory, leaving you alone in that dark, cold corner. The last image of her, her figure fading into the darkness, breaks you completely. You know that what she just told you isn't a lie, and that maybe, just maybe, she was right.
But what destroys you more is that you love her so much, and you can't bear the thought of losing her forever.
#arcane x reader#arcane fanfic#arcane imagine#arcane x female reader#arcane#arcane angst#viktor x you#viktor arcane#viktor x reader#jinx x reader#jinx arcane#vi x you#vi x reader#vi arcane#caitlyn x you#arcane caitlyn#caitlyn x reader#jayce x reader#jayce arcane#ekko x reader#ekko arcane#silco x reader#silco arcane#sevika x reader#sevika arcane#mel x reader#mel arcane#viktor x y/n#vi x y/n#sevika x you
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it's not like henry cavill hasn't ever spoken out against his fans, either. he was perfectly capable of doing so when it came to defending his gf.
but yeah, meanwhile he somehow couldn't ever say anything against the racist, sexist, and homophobic attacks his co-workers were facing since the very beginning of the show that's only gotten increasingly worse as time has gone on? along with the general hatred and vitriol thrown at the show and everyone involved? (except for himself, of course.) which he absolutely contributed to and helped to embolden in the first place due to the pr campaign he ran in s2 to paint himself as this huge defender of the books and advocate for them while acting like lauren wasn't and all in order to cover up how he was the one actually responsible for a lot of the deviations to the books such as cutting geralt's lines and when the thing he was actually mad about was that the show was sticking to the source material by heavily revolving around women as women are very important in the books and help drive the plot forward in massive ways?
and it's not like he would've been unaware of the hatred and vitriol and toxicity taking place in the fandom, either, as by his own admission, he is in online spaces and forums and reading everyone's comments:
"I’m on all the Reddit forums. I’m reading all the reviews. I’m literally trying to get everyone’s information. Some of it is not useful, and other criticisms are incredibly useful. I take it all in, and I look forward to bringing it even closer and closer to Sapkowski’s writing. I think any of those criticisms, they often lie in things like I was saying—we don’t have the advantage of a long involved conversation or dialogue with Geralt, so they are criticisms which I think I was prepared for. So for me, it’s about seeing that, understanding it, and working out how I can do my job better within the framework provided, [how to] appease and make those people feel comfortable that I do actually understand this character—and love this character just as much as they do."
"As a source for information, it’s really helpful for me to see what everyone’s saying, what everyone’s thinking, and to see how much my thinking falls in line with whichever side of that spectrum it is and whether I’m doing the wrong thing, for example, by campaigning hard for the book Geralt to exist or whether I’m doing the right thing."
yet despite that, the thing that he wanted to address with the press and to the fanbase and what his main concern was *checks notes* pushing an image of himself as a defender of the books and geralt's characterization and male characters in general (as if women being prominent in the show somehow came at the expense of the men and as if the prominence of women somehow goes against the books when it's completely in line with them.) whilst virtually never taking any responsibility for how he's the one who fucked up geralt's characterization. (out of 50+ s2 interviews, cavill only admits to any culpability in geralt's mischaracterization in 3 out of those 50+ interviews — all of which happened during interviews or con panels that were over 5+ minutes long and/or took place in foreign press which are all less likely to be picked up and reported on by other news outlets and seen by the fandom.) lying the whole time about why he cut geralt's lines by trying to act like geralt was never originally written as being as verbose as he is in the books in the first place (we know via lauren that geralt was, in fact, written as being as verbose as he is in the books since the pilot episode), acting like he was somehow inspired by doug cockle's voice performance (he was cutting geralt's lines since the pilot episode and filming for the show started in late oct/early nov 2018 but he didn't start doing the "geralt voice" until jan 2019), blaming geralt's lack of dialogue on yennefer and ciri's prominence (yennefer and ciri's scenes were the ones that were cut in s1, btw), and acting like the lines he was cutting weren't really that important so it didn't really matter that he was cutting them anyway (we know via joey that he would often have to improvise and take henry's lines just in order to move the plot along.) and throwing lauren under the bus. (for something that he fucked up in the first place. and because he was mad that the show heavily focuses on women.)
so, like, yeah. i will assume the worst of cavill 'cause that's what i've been shown by him. 🤷♀️
I've been thinking about The Witcher books and tv show recently. Because half of the things that make Geralt seem cool and edgy in the show just don't exist in the books.
In the show he's always so stoic. Most of his exposition has to be told by side characters implying things and you just have to gage his reaction to decide if it's true or not. In the books however, he gives a full lore dump to anyone who's remotely nice to him.
Random Character: So how've you been?
Show Geralt: Hmmmm.... 😒 😔 😒...
Book Geralt: Terrible actually, thank you for asking. Monster hunting is dying out and I have zero transferable skills. Yennifer's left me again and Jaskier's off god knows where. Overall I suppose it could be worse, but that's the life or a Witcher. Also, my perfectly good leather jacket got ruined in a fight the day after I bought it :(
#!txt: the witcher#the witcher#anti henry cavill#long post for ts#and this isn't even getting into his already shady history w women#which includes dating an 18/19yo when he was in his 30s#and his 'i'm afraid to flirt because i might get called a rapist' metoo take#also like he's a self-professed lorebuff redditor gamer nerd#like when has that ever been a winning combination in a man and not a gigantic red flag lol#esp when there's already a billion other red flags anyway
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hi so idk how many doctor who nerds are familiar with aboriginal australian mythology lmaooo but ive learned about it in school a bit and as i did it seemed vv familiar
so as you (probably) know spyfall pt.2 takes part in place in australia right? well!
in aboriginal mythology there is this thing called the dreaming. the dreaming was basically this realm that was “shaped by the actions of mythical creatures”. it is this kind of in between realms, right? an other.
so that doesn’t have to be related to thr kasaavin right? well dwdw theres more,.
one of these “creatures” are known as the great fertility mothers, which basically created the first humans. i think that could relate to how the kasaavin have been around for eons. they have always been around, right? they didnt just appear one day.
now really these could be coincidences, but then u get to this idea of totemism, and tjurungas.
basically, totems would serve as agents, playing certain people in the land of the Dreaming? Look familiar?
seeing this image is what got me thinking about this, because wow ur telling me these long wooden objects connect u to another realm, one that is shaped by the actions of mythical creatures? huh. thats interesting.
lastly, the idea of the tjurunga. basically it was a ritual object, most often made of wood or stone, that represented the manifestation of a mythical being. kinda reminds me of this, yeah?
#idk not that this means anything at all i just find it interesting#like maybe it was based off of aboriginal australian mythology#im such a mythology nerd and also SPYFALL!1!1!#so ♥️#aboriginal australian#mythology#doctor who#dw#spyfall#thirteenth doctor#just was using the notes i took for this btw
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Ok in honor of this post getting pretty widely viewed I'm posting my (self proclaimed) funny tumblr text meme edit here
#in stars and time#siffrin#isabeau#image tag#This is probably the only thing of mine I'll ever publicly share I'm more of a reblogger than a Maker Of Things so#Funnily enough I actually made this Before op posted this scene. I noted the shift from fake portrait to scary portrait back when I was—#playing through act 4 (kind of hilarious thing for Siffrin to get annoyed about. btw. I could character analyze him over that but I won't)—#but I didn't actually realize ISABEAU reacted like this (I fucking missed the blush entirely) until my friend Robin pointed it out to me.#This specific screenshot is something I took right off cloudy's ''sifcore'' tag but ever since Robin mentioned that I was like. Haunted#And then I saw this reblogged by Cloudy and went OH I HAVE THE PERFECT PORTRAITS FOR THIS#Anyway these are The Exact Portraits Used In The Referenced Scene. How do I know for sure? I went back to my fucking second save file—#and looped forwards to floor 3 just to get the interaction again. To check and make sure I was using the exact portraits from the scene#Anyway these fuckers make me ill. Bye#Nebbie posts#<- I FORGOT MY ORGANIZATIONAL TAGS AUUGH
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Just fought Messmer without a spirit ash or assistance, and when I tell you that I just had the most fun in this game within my year of playing it, I’m in no way joking.
I think it’s 1) I’ve gotten pretty good at this game all things considered and 2) Messmer is genuinely an amazing fight with beautiful attacks followed by great windows and punishes. Him being fun is what kept me from being frustrated with myself. This will permanently cement him as my favorite boss fight in the entire game. There isn’t a competition anymore he won.
#My hands are still shaking (this is a good sign for me somehow)#It took under 10 tries which was less than I was expecting tbh#For clarity’s sake I used the Falx#didn’t even use it’s ash of war or any spells#Just gave myself a basic golden vow aow and ran into the chamber#I sometimes wish he was the final boss so that the dlc could end on the highest possible note#but that would be underwhelming given how marketed he was unfortunately#I am still a consort hater btw even though I’ve beaten them twice by now#Elden ring#messmer the impaler#shadow of the erdtree
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Stay Chapter Seven: A Lawlight Kpop AU
Explicit (Slowburn) Lawlight with background Beymane & Meronia Read on AO3 Contains: Depictions of mental illness, including suicide and self-harm; please see fic notes for more detail. Also this is set in Canada. The only thing that makes life bearable for Light Yagami is the Kpop idol Beyond Birthday. His world has shrunk to the little glowing window of his phone, where he spends his days watching Beyond’s videos, re-reading his words, and defending him online from the legions of people who don’t understand that he’s the most important person on Earth. Perhaps his closest remaining relationship is with his anonymous Tumblr nemesis, L, who loves Beyond too, but loves him all wrong. In this chapter: Light experiences ennui in Square One Mall, then answers an important phone call. Thank you so so much to Monica/@lightyaoigami for holding my hand throughout writing this.
He slides off his jacket, holds up the deep green shirt then looks at himself in the mirror. He feels sort of bad but he looks excellent. His hair is too long but otherwise impeccable. His skin has never looked better. He thinks probably Beyond would like this shirt.
#.pages#death note#lawlight#fic#l lawliet#light yagami#happy victoria day if that's a day you have#happy normal monday if it isn't#also please tell me if the discord typing box is leaping out of the main box fgnjlghf#i think i fixed it but you would not believe how much time it took#if you just use the skin as is it's fine btw its super easy to use highly encourage it#if u want to add a scrollbox for some reason. idk. don't do that.
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idk why I thought of this cute drawing crossover idea for pride month but fuck it ! and it’s understandable if you can’t do it but pls take care of ya self !
Kim Pine swimming underwater in a blue aquatic doodle background alongside the Bull Shark Pup aka the shark protagonist from the game Maneater and Kim be casually normally petting its snout while sneakily finding it cute as it nuzzles intelligently back with its snout.
and the Bull Shark Pup has cute waterproof lgbt lesbian flag blanket wrapped around its dorsal fin
and be equally nuzzling it’s snout against Ramona Flower while she was scuba diving allowing her to gently feel the bull shark pup’s. damaged scarred dorsal fin and sneakily use a underwater camera to take picture of its cute unknown existence.
Details: the ref images I sent were to help show what Kim Pine and Ramona Flowers wear while underwater and the in game design of the Bull Shark Pup.
Kim Pine be casually holding her breath underwater cause she can and secretly skilled at it. While wearing a green teal style long sleeved zip swimsuit and red diving mask on her face with a snorkel mouthpiece attached to it. and wearing pair of black red diving flippers.
Ramona Flowers would also secretly dye her hair in the Bull Shark Pup’s unique red blue colour pattern after finding out about its existence and it surviving in a public swimming pool due to Kim Pine discovering it first normally.
While Ramona be wearing a black blue short sleeved zip wetsuit diving flippers and diving mask on her face with a scuba tank on her back
while Ramona breaths from the scuba regulator oxygen mouthpiece in her mouth while holding gently onto a underwater waterproof camera.
i still don’t know why I came up with this and sorry for bothering with this cute idea but pls remember to take care of yourself and have safe day or night !🦈🤿🪸🏳️🌈🫧🎸
wow you came prepared
Yeah, bit too much detail/elaboration for me to really do- especially given I haven't played or seen much gameplay for Maneater just yet- BUT! I did do some sketches based on/around what you've given me here!
+bonus Scott doodle because that's genuinely how I think he'd react to the hair colors shfkshdkfhe
(And here's just the shark, in case anyone wants it- although I will note that it's blown up to fit the canvas, so sorry if that nerfed the quality.)
#the kim there is posed based on the most recent version of that one pool party piece bryan did? bc i was gonna have her be chillin by the +#+poolside and have our shark here be in that. but oh how backgrounds and I are at odds...#spto#sp comic#spvtw#scott pilgrim takes off#scott pilgrim comic#scott pilgrim vs the world#kim pine#ramona flowers#scott pilgrim#there are kimona crumbs.... i will tag it#ship stuff#kimona#art#fanart#maneater#maneater game#sharks#pride month#ooc#asks#jackthesilentgentlemenshark#au#scott pilgrim au#just wanted to note that the haircut i used for ramona is from the end of book 5. i realized i never really see art of that cut? so i took#+it upon myself to Deliver. it's a cute look imo- a little tricky to draw in a satisfactory manner tho#anyhow. requests are still open! and will continue to be for the duration of the month#(another little sidenote: your username tied w this ask made me chuckle a little. my best friend's name is jack and they LOVES sharks)#the last stripe of the flag IS just barely visible btw. i just couldn't scrunch the lines more or I'd cry. so i had to improvise
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Welp, the ref lineup still isn’t done cause I haven’t drawn Shion yet, and the belated valentines I’ve been working on are gonna be like at least a month late cause I just planned three more, but what I did do these past couple weeks is start writing a fanfic and then immediately abandon it to go draw a bunch of only tangentially-related suzutsubas (except for that first pic; that’s a scene from it, albeit one I haven’t written yet), only half of which are fit for public posting (one of ‘em I could make a few edits and feel ok about posting sometime; it’s not that out there, it’s just, y’know. Hamal Cine Bad End Hyperbolic Torture Chamber. I’m usually very “whatever happens happens” about my art but if I don’t show some restraint I know I’ll end up stuck in there forever), but hey, since I’ve been teasing them for ages and finally have some finished stuff with them, take a couple Suzumii! Also gonna ramble abt headcanons under the cut (and it will be LONG)
To begin, a note abt my Len’en gender/pronoun headcanons: as a they/them preferrer myself, I’m thrilled that most people just stick with those for everyone, but I’ve developed some more detailed headcanons as I go through working on designs and I’ll generally be using those. Don’t worry though, most of them are still nonbinary and basically all of them are trans/gq. Relevant ones for this post are Tsubakura: they/them nonbinary (transmasc to some degree) and Suzumi: cis female, question mark?? (to be elaborated on); for clarity’s sake I usually use she/her for Arde and Hamal Cine individually and plural they for the system collectively (also I don’t usually use their nicknames, dunno why), but singular they for Benet (the wiki says Benny is probably short for Benetnasch so I’m assuming that’s their actual name) for reasons which will also be elaborated on (sort of).
Aaalso this clearly isn’t autobiographical or anything but I think I’m subconsciously putting a lot of myself into Suzumi because 1) we do look pretty similar (brown wavy bob + blue eyes) and 2) given their current status as both the main antagonist and the most well-known plural Len’en character (I get the impression that Hooaka also being plural isn’t super common knowledge; I mean it took me several read-throughs of their wiki page and their dialogue with BPoHC Secret Team to get what they were getting at lol) I am probably way too anxious about doing a bad stereotype. Just an observation and also probably partially why I’ve even ended up with so much headcanon for them in the first place
And before I get into the thick of it, notes on derivations from canon: I’m running with the assumption that Suzumi being a system is a relatively recent development tied to whatever incident it was that caused the falling-out, since Tsubakura is like the only person who seems at all familiar with Hamal (including Mitori/Chouki/Fumikado, but they’re more easily explained away as just having met with one of the other alters the few times they’ve interacted) even though she’s supposedly usually the one fronting. They don’t seem to know the mechanics of it though, judging by their confusion when Arde implied that she and Hamal are different people. So basically, I’ll be referring to pre-incident Suzumi as a different character from any of the other three. (Ngl I am very influenced by Dissociation Constant on that and just in general [when will my wife The One and Only Suzutsuba Fic return from the war…..]) I was also debating whether to have Suzumi have any history with the gang before starting to work at the lab/whether stuff would happen around high school or college age, cause they keep referring to everything happening “a long time ago” and I know I, a 24-year-old, feel like stuff that happened five years ago was like yesterday, but I do have the pandemic and not really doing much of anything for most of that time to reckon with so like, eh. College age makes more sense in my head and so does the dynamic of like, Suzumi was only introduced into the friend group (she was acquainted w Hoojiro and Yabu already though bc lab) because she was dating Tsubakura and since that ended, and badly (understatement of the century), they have extremely little reason to be civil with each other and also interacting at all is really awkward.
Ok now on with it! Either end of high school or beginning of college, Suzumi ends up interning at Tsubakura’s lab for college credit (Tsuba’s already practically a department head despite being like 17 or something because. Idk. Who even knows what’s up with them) and she’s like. Only wears t-shirts and jeans (bought a bunch of khakis for this job though), [reading] glasses from the men’s section, hates leaving her hair down (it’s lab safety anyways). Repressed queer in denial, you know the type. Starts interacting a lot with Mx. Tsubakura “wears short shorts that everybody thinks are actually a skirt and also uses ore and omae almost exclusively” Enraku who seems to have everything all figured out and is immediately starstruck (GIRL WHY?? they are such a mess). Lots of “do I want to date them or do I want to be them” confusion (this will be relevant later); eventually evolves into the “am I trans or just a lesbian” question (not that they would need to be attracted to women to be into Tsubakura but you get the picture), which never quite gets answered.
In any case, they do eventually start dating (Tsubakura thinks she’s cute and smart so they reciprocate), and they’re not like super great together cause Tsubakura is emotionally constipated at the best of times (Suzumi’s into that though) and neither of them are the most mentally/emotionally healthy people even back then and also Tsubakura is more or less Suzumi’s boss which is weird, but they’re kind of ok??? Tsubakura’s mom dies at some point, also they move in together (college housing is expensive), the rest of the crew at the very least tolerate Suzumi, etcetera.
And then…! [insert catastrophic event here]!! I don’t have a shot to call on this yet cause I have no idea what it could’ve been (and I’m sure it’ll get revealed at some point anyways); I’m just banking on it being something extremely not mundane and something where you could reasonably set the blame on either (or neither) party cause they sure both seem convinced the other is way worse, huh! In Tsubakura’s case at least, blaming Suzumi is partially a defense mechanism so their self-loathing doesn’t get the better of them over it (guess what the fic was supposed to be about, lol).
The worst part of all this business though is that they DON’T break up over it immediately and it just makes everything orders of magnitude worse for everyone involved. Tsubakura and Arde have hate sex MORE THAN ONCE………… they would both really rather forget about it. Hamal thinks it’s hilarious, ofc, but the less said about her, the better. And Benet… exists??? The only idea that I’m running off of for them atm is the observation that I think they’re the only character with flat black eyes other than Tsubakura/Tsurubami and the subsequent idle thought, “hey if someone malded so hard about a breakup that they ended up with an introject of their ex would that be messed up or what?” So make of that what you will. (Oh and it may have been obvious that this is what I was going for but Hamal is femme and Arde is butch and they’re constantly squabbling abt aesthetic presentation. Having Arde be straight-up male would’ve been too straightforward of an interpretation and I think it’s funnier this way)
The canonically mentioned murder attempts start taking place and I’m leaning towards Tsubakura eventually being convinced to move out even though it was originally their apartment, albeit mostly just because the wikipedia page for house sparrows mentions that they’re known to take over swallows’ nests, usually after they’ve been abandoned, but they will sometimes drive away or kill the current occupants, and that was a very fun fact to come across when specifically doing research for Len’en but idk how else to incorporate it lol. And so on and so forth up until the present time.
Uhhh is that all I have atm? I think so! Anyway, I think I finally shook out all my suzutsuba doodles (and rambling, though I do still have that fic to work on. idk whether I’ll be able to finish it though; I started strong with an extended metaphor in the middle but Iiiii’m not sure if I can successfully write my way up to it while making it make sense. Also I may draw pretty slow but I write even slower!! Eh I’m sure I’ll post some of it sometime) for the time being so I should theoretically be able to finish up my bigger projects now. Maybe I’ll have the valentines ready in time for white day? We’ll see!
#art#len’en#tsubakura enraku#suzumi kuzu#suzutsuba#btw sorry if that’s like not the right ship name lol I saw like one person use it but there’s not much in the tag but that might just be#bcuz ppl don’t seem to make much for it anyways#digital#I should probably ask for len’en discord recommendations sometime soon just given the Circumstances#namely if tumblr actually goes down the drain but also so my little sister doesn’t have to keep watching me have a mental breakdown live#(hi Val!!)#briefly looked into the wiki’s server but that has A THOUSAND MEMBERS?? scary…..#ough FINALLY this post took me like a full day to write#also of note: these are essentially silly little doodles and I got kind of lazy with them#and I still don’t know how to draw Tsubakura’s hat or hair…..#idk why I’ve been having so much trouble differentiating how I draw Suzumi and Tsubakura’s hair but I have and it’s weird
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Man I wonder where the leader of the fear realm could've gone, it's alMOST LIKE NEVIN HAS AN
#had to re-edit the image real quick because the original edit was from a post I made about Drew years ago#and while the Drew thing is becoming less and less likely. Nevin havinv one has basically been canon since#someone mentioned Greg's (was it Britney's) aura being familiar in s2ch1. ive been putting together a list of every line#that points to Nevin's aura throughout the whole thing (most from s2ch1 but then s2ch10 came out and it was really canon at that point)#but clearly i'm running out of time to say ''i fucking called it'' before it's explicitly stated and i dont want to be in another situation#where somebody else will beat me to a theory and me posting anything about it will seem like copying them. sorry about that btw i had#thought i had already mentioned theorizing that nevin was possessed by a demon in that old theory i made but i had forgotten that one was#super old and was about sigma. so no copying there i just got extremely paranoid there was a mention of a cult and i was like ''nuh uh#that's way too specific and out there of a detail to end up in both our theories'' and i forgot the rest of my super old post was outdated#as hell. and echos had gone ''yeah they're so similar!'' and i took their word for it but now i'm realizing they were probably just trying#to be supportive. so yeah no copying there i was just beaten to the punch of saying something. but i will NOT back down from the aura shit#because i have been calling that shit FROM THE START or at least since i started reading ibvs back when ch20 came out.#also not backing down from saying chris was the worse friend because these past few chapters are the first time isaac has done anything tha#could knowingly upset chris meanwhile chris has. let edward drag isaac to the lair after isaac said edward would beat him up. chose not to#believe edward was holding the secrets over their heads because 'it was something isaac had said' and then immediately distrusted edward in#the next chapter because a random person he didn't know said to steal a book (might i mention how that entire scene proves chris' lack of#development and refusal to take responsibility because it perfectly alludes to when chris had brought those fireworks into his old school#and makes me wonder if charlie has actually gotten him in trouble with his past schools or if he's still just not taking responsibility#and if him following nevin to the woods to test out their powers is an extension of ''if something bad happens its not my fault''#like seriously this man would bring a mysterious suitcase onto a plane if he's told to). uh what was i talking about agai#anyway on a related note my mental state has only gotten worse since i left tumblr and the habit of thinking about chris instead of sleepin#or doing schoolwork has not stopped. so i was still failing for a while and might graduate now but am still staying away from tumblr.#so yeah this was a little update and im not going to linger this time im just going to leave tumblr again right after hitting post#addendum because i just can't let things go. and was thinking about chris again. i don't think his lack of development is because of bad#writing (anymore. i used to.). instead i'm certain his character arc is going to continue into him following someone (nevin probably) into#doing something really bad. and then he'll finally get actual consequences and go 'oh shit i fucked up real bad this time'#if you think that theory is reaching too far into the future you should hear mine about isaac dying at the end lmao
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wheres that one post thats like do u ever find a character that feels so specifically tailored to ur interests that it almost pisses u off. that is siffrin to me rn
#hes like. the funniest mix of therion and junpei u could ever imagine#what if u took a silly little guy and threw their ass in a time loop. and they used the time loop to be a silly little guy (advanced)#theyre litally the best possible candidate for this job bc they LOVE fucking w people to see what happens. but not in the bad way#its so fun to watch them get used to the idea so fast like 'well if i fail at this kinor thing and look like a fool ill just go back lol'#and the fact that they use time loops to take advantage of a bit. now THAT is how u do it#wonderful incredible no notes. cant wait to see the hundreds of time loops chip away at them until theres nothing#isat#oh i uh. bought the full game btw. it possessed me#gonna bounce between isat and yumi nikki until im done with either or both of em :]
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so i just updated blender......
#will i do something with it...... maybe#posting this to hold myself accountable as always.#🗒#omg thanks to my 2-years-ago self btw... she took some notes while learning things and thank god for that#because it just hit me that i do NOT remember how to use this shit at allll.................... but we move#it can be fun to try. i think
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I'll stop drawing boring poses when I figure out WHAT THE FUCK EVERYONE LOOKS LIKEEE
#i love you golan It Came To Us In A Dream trevize . man that you are#the first one was my first iteration of trevize before they described him as Curlyyy haired in and earth <333#i love btw the recency bias (and I suppose we spend longer with trevize)#notes for design is umm Terminians getting described as being (atrociously) grey-on-grey#and also somehow needing to balance between Trevize identifying with his naval background but also officially presenting himself as a polit#cian (Councilman is still his title!)#also something secret about the neuronic whip is that I don't care how often Asimov describes it I'm just going to draw a couple shapes and#call it a day. sorry. it means nothing to m edfgjhfg.#i had one pic of my FIRST ever trevize design that i literally took on the fucking warehouse floor but I wa slike nah some things are too s#hitty even for my rapidly deteriorating tumblr blog#another side note because there aren't enough already i miss when the computer was in trevize's bedroom instead of the flight deck that mag#ically materialized during and earth booo it used to be so intimate#i guess i can pretend the flight deck was an anteroom but it sucks#okay . i'm done now! ahaha#queue#visual#doodle#asimov chronology#golan trevize
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So I drew cyrus in one of his outfits from TACO salad!! A amazing fic by Lady_Sandry on ao3. Some close ups under the read more and notes in the tags!
#octopath traveler 1#octopath traveler#cyrus albright#okay Now i can ramble#So. first off i honestly dont think i did a great job making him look like cyrus. i do struggle to transfer characters into my style without#lowkey redesigning (the curse of rarely doing fanart and being a character designer)#constructive criticism welcome btw!!#but some general design notes!!#i wanted to add purple into his color scheme because its simply a color i associate with him (to me Therion is light purples and cyrus is#dark purples)#despite his actual color being black. i just dont like using black unless im doing like blank and white w pops of colors#same thing with white. i normally use off whites.#about his eyes!! they are grey in the fic so here i gave him very grey light purple eyes (for previously mentioned reasons of not liking#black and white)#and!! to represent his magic are the blue yellow and red eye shines. red being the main one since its mentioned he was naturally inclined#towards it in the fic#i used paper and pencil (overlined w a blue pen) then took a picture and drew atop that in ibis paint (great option if you only have a phone#btw.)#also i havent drawn since. literally my last post#so im Rusty#getting back into it yippie<3
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A hilarious side effect of watching Naruto now as an occasional action writer. A lot of these fights, I'm paying attention to the actual choreography of the moves. & for all the crazy ninja magic, there's not much to translate over there, but for the taijutsu?? Especially someone like Lee. I was watching his fight with Kimimaro just now and going "Oh my God... I NEED to use that move somewhere in ITNL"
So. Ya kno. Added fight creativity lol. Hopefully.
#speculation nation#fanny watches naruto#itnl shit#one of my fav fights of the anime btw. im just having so much fun.#AND i both rewatched a certain moment of it over and over again And paused to think through how id implement it for vash#i took note of it. im still not sure When id implement it but i know How id implement it.#if i cant fit it into a preexisting fight god damn i'll MAKE a fight specifically so i can use this move.#im also rly looking forward to when i can move onto shippuden bc it has better budget than the original#and thus better animation and THUS better FIGHTS#and im always thinking with my writing brain see. every single thing that piques my interest runs thru a filter#of 'can i apply this experience to my writing in any way?'#which is how i ended up thinking about vash flying when i was ziplining in the mountains.#me 500 feet up in the air zipping between two mountains like 'hmmm this sure is a flying experience huh'#HFKDHFMDJ yeah ❤️ thats just kinda how i am#so yea shippuden fight choreography... here i come...
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Hi! I hope you’re doing good in life.
What do you think of a phantom hourglass remake? Tbh I don’t know how they could remake it without basically remaking it from the ground-up. It would probably play more like windwaker, which I see as a both a good and bad thing. On the one hand, if it was more like windwaker a lot more people would probably play and it would be more popular since I know the touch controls were a turn off for most people for both Spirit Tracks and Phantom hourglass. But on the other hand, remaking it to be more like windwaker would make the game lose some of it’s previous identity. Like, Phantom hourglass was so unique because of the touch controls and the puzzles you can make and solve by having two screens and touch controls. And it was so nifty and handy to be able to write notes on your map. Idk, I still would like it to be remade in general even if it ends up a basically different game, but I wouldn’t change the story or the characters, especially Linebeck. The only other change I would make is the music. Phantom hourglass had rather weak themes, mainly because they re-used the same theme for the islands and the dungeons. The only songs that were really good were the few orginal tracks made for the game, so Linebeck’s theme, Oshus’s theme, both Bellum boss battle themes and the and that music that plays when you first follow the Ghost Ship. But what would you want out of a phantom hourglass remake?
Hey, I’m doing good, and I hope you are too!
I’ve thought a bit about a possible Phantom Hourglass remake, but not too much recently. I don’t really know if I’d want one, since you’d lose a lot of what really makes it special, and you can still play it through other means. I’m personally fond of the graphics and the music- yes, even the dungeon theme has grown on me- so I don’t really want a remake too badly, especially since I fear any additions/changes they might make with story or characters in a remake. The touch controls make it, and playing it on pc recreates that feeling decently well, but I don't think it'll be just the same if you had to control it with joysticks or anything.
Not to mention, there's so much emphasis on having the two screens, too, not just for map stuff, but almost every single boss had a mechanic related to the top screen! I have no fucking clue how you'd replicate that very well on something like the switch without just fucking with the mechanics altogether.
I would kill to hear some of Phantom Hourglasses tracks be orchestrated or otherwise rearranged in a higher quality. I wouldn't want any of the more notable themes altered in any way, no adding or removing of melodies and only very very small changes to the instrumentation, but I think it'd be neat to see what could be done with dungeon themes. I think a while back I had a fleeting desire to write some short tracks for each dungeon, with some ideas like mostly using instruments heard in Bellum's themes for the dungeons while each individual one gets a leading instrument unique to and reflective of the dungeon, while the Ghost Ship maybe gets a song that's a bit of a expanded version of the fog theme, while the Temple of the Ocean King could have slightly different themes the further in you got, starting with instruments more common to Oshus's theme or the great sea theme, while the further in you got the more instruments from Bellum's theme would be heard, plus some harpsichord thrown in for the hell of it.
Leave the original dungeon theme for stuff like the minor pyramids and some larger cave areas, idk. It's grown on me.
I think the only story rearranging I'd want is mayyyyybe unfridging Tetra? You could very easily shuffle some things around with her and just not damsel her for the whole game and honestly it'd still go off perfectly without a hitch. But you'd still have to deal with the World of the Ocean King being a whole other world, so either bring her and her crew in and have them as wandering ship npcs (the better idea) or just leave them out (not a good idea) but either way it's better than what they actually did. I just don't think I'd want it to switch to Tetra being a major reoccurring character tbh, the main character dynamics in PH are good as they are.
I think I like Phantom Hourglass too much as it is to really want a remake at all. I'd rather we get something like an anime adaptation. That's what I think about more. Give me animated Phantom Hourglass with some fun takes on the dungeons and fights and some fun slice of life stuff with the group between the islands what I want is a Phantom Hourglass anime
#asks#zeldanamikaze#salty talks#loz#legend of zelda#phantom hourglass#kinda just boils down to like. i kinda want it to remain untouched with nothing added or removed if that makes sense#different themes for the dungeons would be rlly cool. harpsichord for deeper ocean king temple floors bc its where you meet linebeck#also vague foreshadowing? as an aside how many other loz songs have harpsichord in it im very curious to know#also. i say i dont mind the dungeon theme while also not really minding my tinnitus so also take that in mind maybe. brain go brrrrrr#i think adding tetra in to the main crew of ph would kinda be a bit much and also maybe not add very much. fyi i have not played ww#but i feel like it'd almost be adding another ciela cuz shed support link and be more barbed and bold with a side of less morally upstandin#so i dont really think she'd being much new to the ph crew table and i wouldnt want her there in a remake cuz they might pull the#goddess blood card and i really really like how ph has fuck all to do with hyrule or any of that nonsense#sorry this took so long btw. i dont think much abt a ph remake so i dont have a lot of notes#additions? idk add more rooms to linebecks ship. let us poke around in a few areas. maybe potion storage. give link a room#let us poke around in linebeck's room when possible. put smth fun in there. pull a wilds era and give him a journal for us to check out#what they did with tetra kills me (but not too much since i dont rlly have thoughts on tetra) bc you could just remove her entirely#and the story would still work really well anyways. holy character fridging batman#idfk. give us a silly loz dating game. make linebeck an option. thats what i wanna see
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thank you for the love on my fursona forecast post🩷
#:] it's just very nice...#i loved my deviantart days but that was like 2011-2014... when people actually left comments and wanted to make friends and things#i stopped posting my art due to anxiety over MANY things and didn't start again until like 2020#but i've only used instagram and it SUCKS!!!!!!!!! and twitters algorithm is shit so i never even tried#so all that to say that tumblr has been such a nice surprise and closer to my deviantart days than my insta posts#even getting like 10 notes. i get more than just likes. it's nice to know someone actually took the time to look at my work!#and not just mindlessly like my post in the hell that is instagrams feed#really i'm just happy to share my art! it's been a long time since i've let myself enjoy creating#but knowing that others enjoy it makes me very happy :]#next up is probably my fursona in a cute little pride outfit :] and i drew him doing my favorite thing.....!#he's.... he's.... fucking standing there !!! WOOOO!! YEAAAA !!!#anyway. long ramble to say it brings me a lot of happiness to see people enjoying my work and i'm glad i've decided to share it with you !#:D#bark bark#btw i made the art a couple months before moving to the pnw... but i was yearning for it so the art is heavily influenced by that also#the background and the temperature and the. well. rain. lmfao#so. this piece makes me feel a little fuzzy now that i'm here
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