#just ufffff

[the-bees-are-beeing]

Goosebumps hearing and entire stadium chant "Berlin Berlin wir fahren nach Berlin"

[makimahinalno]

So im back about Gortash x Durge brainrot. I made a post about how crazy they were before Orin usurped Durge, but now I gotta talk about tadpoled/good-aligned Durge returning and Gortash seeing them.

When he finds out they survived he is over the moon happy. They were always reliable and resourceful unlike Orin, now they are coming back and he might still succeed in his plans, plus he always wanted to share power with them. So he invates Durge and their companions to his coronation, he is trying his best to stay composed from excitement.

So imagine his disappointment and shock, when Durge arrives in front of him. He expected a cocky smile, a proud and superior look on their face, any sign that they remember their past together, but they have changed completely. Karlach is there too, but he cares nothing for her, in his mind she was improved when she was given to Zariel, she helped with his technological progress and she dares to be ungrateful? A brat in his mind.

But he is heartbroken because Durge has changed? They look at him with suspicion and disgust, they are completly on guard around him. What did Orin do to them? How could they forget all the crimes they commited, all the perversions they indulged in, their masterful plan to conquer the world, the trip to the Hells, the way they sighed and moaned each others names? Its even worse if Durge has a lover. He is burning with jealousy, even though he will never admit it. After the coronation, he would watch through his Steel Watchers all their movements.

He sees them laughing with their companions, they are helping people in need, they used to torture people for fun, what are they doing? Helping children, hugging and making them smile with silly faces? They used to sarcastically remark that death of a child is a timeless tragedy, then they would burst into giggles. Durge is kissing, being tender with a new lover? He breaks everything in his room, the servants leave terrified as he might kill them. How dare that fool touch his lover, his dearest and nearest, Durge was his and his alone, others are unworthy to even look upon them. But that's the thing, 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘩𝘪𝘴. They were his no longer, the person he adored was gone, replaced by a "wish to be a hero" person. Disgusting.

He can only sit and watch, as he realises that Durge has no wish to uphold their fragile alliance. The Iron Throne is gone, the Steel Watch has been destroyed, its explosion echoing around the city. He hears the commotion in the throne room, the yells and clashing of steel, the sound of the footsteps getting closer to his office. He doesn't even hear Karlach, he is only looking at Durge. There is only hatred, pure hatred on their face.

He knows then, that his death has come, by a person he trusted the most. Was this how Karlach felt? It did sting. Durge's cold eyes and Karlach's screams are the last thing he sees and hears, as Bane claims his soul for enternal torment.

[the-jam-to-the-unicorn]

New Year's Greetings from Ze

Dear People!

Behind me stands Mother Ukraine. Ukraine that stands firmly on its feet, does not bow its head, looks ahead, believes in its future and victory over all the evil that Russia has brought us. Ukraine that is capable of achieving a just peace – having a shield and a sword. Defending its people, its colors, its Independence. Today I address all those who value Ukraine, cherish their state, and lovingly call it “Mine.” I thank you for 2024. Our people who endure all difficulties with dignity. People for whom being citizens of Ukraine is a source of pride. And for me, it is a pride to be the President of such people – Ukrainians who prove that no cruise missile can defeat a nation that has wings.

Throughout this leap year, we have proven it every day. And we saw it yesterday. When we were uplifted with happiness because 189 Ukrainians returned from captivity to their native land. Because they will celebrate the New Year at home. Because we are bringing our people back. 1,358 people this year. 3,956 Ukrainians during this time. And I’m giving not estimates but precise numbers, because each one represents a person, our person, a very important person. And with each return – we bring life back to Ukraine.

And every time this happens, we all cry. It doesn’t matter if it’s a moved mother, or it’s a child who finally has their father back, or the President of Ukraine – we all cry because we are all human, and we have kept the light within us.

And it helped us endure through over 1,000 days. To be brave when it was needed most. To be strong when it was so vital. As did our teachers, our medics, our power engineers, our transport workers, as did all our air defense personnel, mobile fire groups. The guys who brought down 1,310 cruise and ballistic missiles this year, and 7800 Iranian “Shahed” drones. Bravo! We are proud! Thank you! We lived through this year together. We overcame everything 2024 brought together. Victories and setbacks. Joys and challenges. Tears of happiness when we succeeded. And tears of pain when our hearts were wounded.

July. Morning. Okhmatdyt. That’s how weaklings and cowards strike. And we will never forget those children’s eyes. We will never forgive them for this! When evil brings death, our response is a human chain. This is what the strength of Ukrainians looks like. And that unity of ours could be seen from space. God saw it. He saw what kind of people we have. What kind of children we have. And I will never forget those incredibly mature and strong eyes of the boy from Okhmatdyt. How much life is in him, energy and dignity! And how much stronger this child alone is than Putin! How much stronger all our children are than their entire evil. Ukrainian boys and girls who are winning this war, gaining knowledge online and even in underground schools, winning global science competitions, raising funds for our army, and inventing technological solutions that help with our defense. You are a phenomenal generation! This is who we are fighting for. This is who our heroes, our warriors, protect above all. Those who stand firm and carry Independence on their shoulders. Where freedom and valor fight every day – even now, on this New Year's night. On all our fronts. On all of them. In the east, where it’s extremely, extremely difficult and challenging right now. But we believe, we know: you will stand strong. Our guys will stand strong. Your spirit and courage will stand strong. All the things that helped you not to surrender our Sumy and Kharkiv, our Kherson and our Zaporizhzhia this year. And the Russians wanted it so badly. But instead – you paid the occupiers back, bringing the war back home to Russia. And the one who sowed evil on our land received it on their own. In the Kursk region and in other places where our response, our justice, came this year.

Justice. Just one word, but behind it stand hundreds of thousands of our people. Our defense industry and our science. Whose minds and work have made us stronger, because 30% of everything our guys had on the battlefield this year – all this was made in Ukraine.

And at one of these facilities, I asked a young engineer: "How did you manage to achieve so much? How were these people able to do all of this?" And the young man joked: "They're not just people, they're missiles."

And you know, at that moment, I felt ashamed as a citizen that since the 90s, the state hadn’t noticed such people of ours. And I am proud, when meeting them throughout the year I hear: they are happy to be needed by Ukraine. And that Ukraine is once again building its own, its own missiles. And for the first time, it produces over a million drones in a year. Forcing the enemy to learn Ukrainian. Palianytsia, Peklo, Ruta. Making them tremble at the words Neptune and Sapsan. All these are our missiles. Ukrainian. Hor, Vampire, Kolibri, Kamik, Liutyi, Heavy Shot, Firepoint. All these are our drones. Ukrainian. And all these are our arguments, the arguments for a just peace.

It is achieved only by the strong. And we have proven time and again that we are strong. Our athletes. Oleksandr Khyzhniak, our Tank. Olga Kharlan, Yaroslava Mahuchikh, all our Olympians and Paralympians, for whom we cheered, worried, and screamed with joy and pride when the blue and yellow flag was raised. We took the hits and fought back alongside Oleksandr Usyk. All of this is about something bigger than just sports. It’s about our character. It’s about who we are and what we are capable of. It’s about meanings and symbols. It’s about Sashko’s fights, like Ukraine’s daily battles, showing us: it doesn't matter how much bigger the enemy is compared to you, what matters is how much bigger your will is. Then it takes the breath away of the whole world! And all the leaders told me frankly: "We've never seen anything like this – when a full hall of Notre-Dame de Paris is applauding." And those were applause for you. For all our people. This is what respect for Ukraine sounds like. This is what Independence is.

It’s when we don’t give up what’s ours. And when we don’t forget our people. Those who are in captivity. And we will fight for every person who, unfortunately, is still there. And we will fight for all those whom Russia has forced into occupation; but couldn’t occupy their Ukrainian hearts. And no matter how many passports evil hands out at gunpoint, our people say: "You are not our kin, you are temporary." And all those imposed weeds will not take root on our land, will not defeat the natives. I always recall the story about one of our Ukrainian elderly men, whom the occupiers asked: "What time is it?" And he answered: "Time to get off our land." This is what the inner will is, which simply cannot be occupied. And I turn to all those who carry this will in their hearts on the temporarily occupied territories. Dear Ukrainians! I know you are celebrating the New Year according to our time, and now you hear these words. In our Crimea, in Donbas, in Melitopol, in Mariupol – everywhere where Ukraine is awaited. And where, one day, Ukraine will return to be together. And the only thing that will divide Ukrainians is a generously laid table.

I know that all our people will be at this table. Those who are now abroad but have kept Ukraine in their hearts. So today, in the first minute of the New Year, in Warsaw, New York, or Buenos Aires, "Shche ne vmerla…" will sound. In Berlin, Prague or Tokyo, people will say today: “Glory to Ukraine!” And the world will respond: “Glory to the Heroes!” Because Ukraine is not alone. Because we have our friends with us. Since the first minutes of this war, America has stood with Ukraine. I believe that America will also stand with Ukraine in the first minutes of peace.

I remember my conversation with Joe Biden after the Russian invasion. I remember my conversation with Donald Trump after he was elected. All the conversations with Congressmen, Senators, ordinary Americans, with all those who support us in the US, in Europe, and around the world – in those many and varied conversations, there was always unity on the main point: Putin cannot win. Ukraine will prevail.

I thank all Americans for proving these words with deeds. I have no doubt that the new American President is willing and capable of achieving peace and ending Putin’s aggression. He understands that the first is impossible without the second. Because this is not a street fight where you have to calm down both sides. This is the full-scale aggression of a mad state against a civilized one. And I believe that we, together with the United States, are capable of exerting that force. Of compelling Russia into a just peace. That means not forgetting, and not erasing everything Russia has done. Bucha, Olenivka, Avdiivka, all our destroyed towns and villages. This is why a truly just peace cannot be based on the principle of “let’s start with a clean slate.” Because the score is not 0:0. The score is thousands, thousands of Ukrainians whose lives Russia has stolen.

And today, the heart of Ukraine is covered with scars. These are the names of our fallen heroes. May God protect every family in the world from experiencing such losses. I would not wish any leader in the world to experience these feelings – the moment you hand over awards posthumously. You see the eyes of a mother, a wife, or a child of a warrior who gave their life for Ukraine, and you hear them say: "Please, let it all not be in vain." Thousands of our guys and girls have not faded into oblivion. They are with us, they are by our side, always, they are watching over us from the heavens. And we have no right to let them down, and we cannot betray their feat and memory.

And every day in the coming year, I, and all of us, must fight for a Ukraine that is strong enough. Because only such a Ukraine is respected and heard. Both on the battlefield and at the negotiating table.

I thank everyone who has stood by us this year. Our partners, allies, friends, leaders. Leaders indeed, not because it is customary to call them that, but because they prove their leadership by their actions. Those who were not afraid to come to Ukraine, knowing how valuable it is to see us standing shoulder to shoulder. With whom, despite the distance and time difference, we worked together, found solutions and achieved results. Patriots, IRIS-Ts, NASAMS and ATACMS systems, F-16s, SCALPs, Storm Shadows. The Czech initiative and a million shells. The Danish model and hundreds of millions in our domestic production. 27 security agreements and 40 billion to support our army. The European Union and 50 billion to support our economy. The G7 and the decision on 50 billion dollars of frozen Russian assets. This is our great international work. This is our great international victory. I thank our partners, thank you for this; I thank our team. The Army, the Government, the Office, the Parliament, the regions, the communities, the volunteers. All those who strengthen our country from within and care about people.

I thank everyone thanks to whom Ukraine is standing and will stand. It will overcome its path to peace, to a strong Ukraine. And to a European Ukraine. And these are not just words, but a reality that began this June with the opening of negotiations on Ukraine's accession to the EU. And this is a historic result. And this path is irreversible. And Ukraine will be in the European Union. And one day Ukraine will be in NATO and will strengthen the Alliance. It will strengthen the stability of the world. The unity of Europe, which determines the destiny of every nation on the continent. And this unity must be respected by all. By both Budapest and Bratislava. I know the Hungarian and Slovak peoples are actually with us, with Ukraine, with Ukrainians, on the side of truth. The authorities of these countries should also acknowledge the truth. There is no need to be afraid of Ukraine being in Europe. We must do everything to prevent Russia from being in Europe. Its tanks, its missiles, and the evil it will surely spread further if Ukraine does not withstand. If Russia shakes your hand today, it does not mean that tomorrow, it will not start killing you with the same hand. Because Russians are afraid of the free people. Of what they are not familiar with. They are afraid of freedom. They were born under Putin, went to school under Putin, joined the army under Putin and are dying for his sick ideas.

And that is why it is so crucial today to support all peoples who defend freedom. Those who refuse to give it up in Chișinău. Those who are fighting for their future in Tbilisi. And I am sure that the day will come when we will all say: "Long Live Belarus!"

Dear Ukrainians!

May 2025 be our year. The year of Ukraine. We know that peace will not be given to us as a gift. But we will do everything to stop Russia and end the war. This is what each of us wishes for.

Behind all of us stands Mother Ukraine. And she deserves to live in peace. I wish this to all of us. And as the President of Ukraine, as well as a citizen, I will do everything to achieve it in the coming year. Knowing that I will not be alone. I know that you stand shoulder to shoulder with me – millions of Ukrainians. Strong. Free. Beautiful. Independent.

Happy New Year, dear people!

Happy New Year, Ukraine!

Glory to Ukraine!

[weisbrot]

i do enjoy the widget feature but now i got him just looking at me 🫣 sir, dont you have a revolution to run somewhere?

[thetorturedlovergirl]

Friend asked me who was the girl on my lockscreen (Jodie) and haha that was her fucking end bc I started explaining who Jodie was and 13th Doctor and start searching for pics to show her

[geat-26]

@hydranomago and I like chefs :D

[gu6chan]

i spent so much money yesterday stocking things up for the winter but my yearning for a leonard plush has overcome me and after a very unnecessary search i now marvel at how affordable some of these cheap plush commissions really are..... but alas i actually need to save money rn since i have a feeling these coming months are gonna be cost heavy lmao

im thinking about setting the default price at 00.10 USD (0.09 EUR) a word btw

Ofc reference material of my previous translations are available!! I've also never done commissions or anything of the sort before so i may not be perfect with the process, I apologize.... :( But ofc, I'd be sure to do my best!!!

It'd probably have to be text based (Documents like stories, manga, whatnot) since I have a good bit of trouble processing audio real smooth and spoken Japanese is notoriously hard to pick up on for me 😭 but even if there's subtitles, I'll be able to do a lot with it!!! And I definitely don't mind doing R18+ content, just hit me with whatever!!

Shares would be appreciated just so i can reach a bit out there, but no worries! This isn't particularly pressing or anything lol

[virgilvandijkswifey]

massive.

[mikassaviola]

Hiii! Is your Psychotic fic still on watt pad? I tried looking for it but it isn’t appearing? :(

Hey I'm sorry but I've been dealing with studies and stuff and I'm not writing much anymore.... I deleted it but I guess I'll make a comeback after I get my life on.... A lil track

[a-na-dhil]

i think my biggest struggle in life is being a theatre fan, and in particular a musical fan, while not having any talent whatsoever for dancing, singing or acting.

[sainz]

im always thinking “this would suit a carlos edit” when listening to new songs

[verydelicatematter]

I will forever spread the word of the marauders character with songs in spanish, we are truly waisting so much potential !!!!!!

[catiuskaa]

honestly, Minho’s fault! too much fluff potential for one pretty man.

need you to [Lee] Know.

SUMMARY: minho loves you: to him, it’s as clear as water. Its only after he finds out that you’re starting to doubt it—he needs you to know just how much.

REQUESTED! here by an anonnie. I hope you like it, pookie, ‘cause I had fun doing this! <3

CW: slight hurt/comfort if you squint, but it’s just fluffy fluffy lino being really down bad and not knowing how to grasp it tbh which just gives me my serotonin dosis for the rest of the month lol

WC: 1.2k

A/N: also omfg kats posting two requests on the same day? that’s right baby, look at me go! 🤩🤩🤩

[🔅★🌼★🔅]

Minho was not the type to show his affection.

He comes off more like a shy kitten that slowly gets used to you, your sweet smell and how soft your touch feels, and then slowly opens up.

“But, uh… can I be real with you for a sec?”

It’s a feminine voice with a strong accent. He can hear it comming from your room, and the slight glitchiness of it makes it obvious that it’s a phone call set on speaker.

“Sure.” He can almost see you shrug, but he just closes the main door as soft as he can, pleading for the cats to stay silent for a little bit longer.

Minho can’t exactly place together why he’s overhearing your phone call. He knows who you’re calling, he can recognize Chan’s sister by her tone. But still, he keeps quiet, gently placing his bag down and silently taking his shoes off.

“I just— and don’t get me wrong, but, your boyfriend kinda seems… bored of you.”

What? Minho has to hold back a scoff, remaining as still as a statue next to the front door. He’s waiting for you to deny it.

“You think so?”

And then, he frowns, because you didn’t. Instead, your tone sounded hesitant. Dubious.

As if you weren’t sure if Minho loved you.

“You say he keeps cancelling your plans together. He has stopped making time for you. Like, girl, you can’t remember when was the last time he told you he loved you.”

Hannah pauses, and that only makes it worse, because it lets every word sink in.

“I uh, well. I ain’t gonna say that he should throw flowers at you every single second, but, uh, you know.”

He can only hear you groan loudly, almost picturing that cute motion you usually did when he meaningly teased you, taking your hair and covering your face with it.

“Can’t say anything for sure with him,” Hannah adds. “But, just by what you’re saying…”

Minho’s heart clenches tightly in his chest. He doesn’t want to keep hearing this... this nonsense. God, he loves you. And you… can’t see it? Frowning, he starts walking to your room, but his movements end in a halt, his hand just above the doorknob, threatening to grasp it and fully open the door.

“Girl, it’s gotta be late down there. Sorry this whole call was about me.” Your chuckle comes off slightly dry. “I’ll talk to you later, ‘kay? Go get some good sleep.” Your tone just screams how bad you’re feeling, and it just makes his chest swell with guilt that slowly creeps up his body.

Maybe he had been taking you for granted?

He opens the door as soon as you press the red button, sighing loudly after ending the call. When you see him, you jump in your place, startled by his presence, and you stand up awkwardly.

“Minho!” You say in a squirm. He can’t help but cringe slightly.

“No.” His tone sounds childish, like a petty toddler who didn’t want to eat the carrots in their lunch.

You frown slowly, the slightly wary grimace melting on your face, allowing a soft confusion to step in.

“No what?” You mutter.

He walks to you slowly, and grabs your hand, taking it to his chest, pressing it flat against his clothed skin, over his heart. You can feel his heartbeat, a not-too-slow rhythm: thump, thump, thump.

“Call me by a pet name. Any pet name.” He says, his tone equally firm and soft. “Call me by a pet name and say you love me.”

He’s serious, but god, so fucking nervous. His brain is slowly melting away because he’s so bad with words and he isn’t sure any action could be enough. He’s already blushing.

“I, huh… I love you, jagi.” You mumble, still confused.

And even if you don’t say it as fondly as always, or if your smile isn’t beaming like how it usually did, you can feel his heartbeat quickening.

“You can feel it, right?” His eyes are soft and worried.

Oh, God. You just know you’ve gotta be pouting. It’s hard to react with words, and the only thing you can fathom doing is linking your arms behind his nape and sinking your face on the crook of his neck.

“Min, I’m so sorry.”

“N-no, kitten.” He mumbles, hugging you tightly too. “I am the one who’s sorry.”

He breathes in, drowning in your soft fragrance. Home. It’s you, it’s warm, and he loves it.

He loves you.

So, he says it. He has to say it. He can’t not say it.

“I love you.”

And it feels so good to let it out that he chuckles. He has to say it again. “I love you.” And again. “God, I love you.” Just once more. “I love you so much.” He’s giggling like a fool, but he’s a fool in love, and that makes him blush even more. “I can’t not love you. Not loving you would turn everyday into Mondays. Like, I can get it tattoed if you want me to. I just. I love you so much that ‘I love you’ can’t even—.”

You move from his shoulder, now facing him, and you cradle his face, pulling him in a kiss that’s so sweet that threatens to give both of you type 1 diabetes.

“Y-you’re crying.” Minho mumbles, softly brushing the stray tears away with his thumb.

“It’s your fault, silly.” You sniff, giggling too. “How can you say stuff like that?”

Your heart is beating like crazy, the butterflies in your stomach are multiplying by seconds and in your cheeks glistens a bright and deep shade of pink.

You want to say it too. But in his own way.

So, you take his hand and settle it on your chest. Right above your heart.

It’s a rapid thump thump thump that Minho feels right away. He can’t help but smile widely.

“I super-mega-love you.” He teases, picking you up in between his arms.

You’re laughing, squirming in his hold.

“Lee Minho! Put me down!”

But he just grips your body tighter to his, and walking as if you weighted nothing, heading towards your bed, plopping you down there.

“Good girl.” He snickers, and you blush even further. Minho takes your chin tenderly and pecks your lips. For a moment, certain kind of idea flashes through his head, but he just kissed you again, following his previous thought.

He opens your closet with a toothy grin, and halfly eyes the window before picking up a random shirt, a grey hoodie that used to be his, a dark skirt and your thigh-high socks, going as far as to the suspenders for you.

He then turns to face you, his eyes glowing. He can’t wait to see you all dolled up. Minho feels like a teenager, and he loves it.

“You have twenty minutes.”

You blink at him, and you can’t help but smile, confused.

“I’m taking your cute ass to a date.”

It may not be an instant fix to the struggles to your relationship, but as you two walk down the beach, looking for colourful rocks that match each other’s eye colour, you know that he’s worth fighting for.

Regarding Minho, he happily hums to himself, eyes glued to your figure as you cackle and run in the beach, as you look behind you and giggle at the prints your boots leave in the humid sand.

He smiles, running towards you, tackling you and holding you in his arms.

He’s not letting go anytime soon.

~Kats, who always struggles to choose a picture for the fics because istg lino looks good in every single moment!!

[deisavage]

I can't leave my parents' house but at least I have my camp 😋

[yourfriendmystery]

It's been like forever since I posted art on here haha

[bluesest]

A guy telling his boyfriend who is sitting on the toilet to hold in his diarrhea and beg for release

A Holding Boyfriend

My boyfriend and I had a great amazing date where we went to a critically acclaimed restaurant called: "The evening", it was an amazing night and the dishes were a total delight:

As an entrance they gave us a glass with 10 shrimp, they looked incredible and my boyfriend devoured most of them, I wanted to stop him because he was aware of what happens to his stomach when he consumes any type of seafood, but when I told him he replied:

Boyfriend: "It's not for so much love, I prefer the taste and suffer the consequences, because I tell you that this is totally delicious"

Me: "It won't be nice when... forget it"

I stopped at that precise moment, my neurons agreed that this could lead to a situation that was quite ... interesting.

10 minutes of anecdotes and laughter passed, the waiter gave us the main course: "Filet Mignon" with potatoes and asparagus, we had several sauces to choose from but my boyfriend's favorites were: "Brown Sauce" made from celery, onion, meat broth, garlic, among other ingredients, and also the classic barbecue sauce, all these made in an artisanal way, It was an amazing dinner at an amazing restaurant, we paid the bill and with a great feeling in our stomachs we left the establishment.

When I got into the car my boyfriend said some words that would leave me cold:

Boyfriend: "I think it's better to leave the windows open"

Me: "But it's very cold out there"

Boyfriend: "My stomach is baking something heavy, I think it wasn't a good idea after all"

Me: "I warned you"

Boyfriend: "But I don't regret it"

He started leaning quickly, held the steering wheel tightly and let out a giant gas, I never thought he would be able to match something like that.

*PPFPFPFPFPFPTTTTTTTTTTTT*

Boyfriend: "Ufffff that was a good one"

I blushed at the time, me and he have been together for at least 3 years where we have acquired a small apartment and I had never heard or smelled a fart like that in the time I live with him.

Neither he nor I bothered at that moment, as a couple we have witnessed many things from each other including our embarrassments, he is usually quite open to these issues and has no shame at all about farting at least in front of me, it is something I admire about him, his trust towards me to show something that you would never show someone, even if it is something as "disgusting" but natural as farts.

He began to laugh sheepishly while I enjoyed the natural smell of his intestines invading my nostrils touching them softly like a light, pleasant scent of a small flower between his large, tight buttocks.

He began to feel his stomach with his left hand as he paid attention to the road and said:

Boyfriend: "I feel gassy"

My eyes shone with those words, I didn't want to be an obstacle to him so I said:

Me: "Fart freely, don't worry about me"

Boyfriend: "Are you sure? I mean... doesn't it bother you?"

I put my hand on his stomach and said, "I like every part of you" and then I started to lower my hand to his crotch releasing some of the sexual pressure I felt and couldn't hold, just the smell that was locked in the car served as an aphrodisiac for me.

Boyfriend: "You should take that hand out of there"

Me: "Why?"

*PPFPTPPTPTPTPTPTPTPTPTPTF* *PRRRRRR*

I was immediately surprised and automatically began to grab his crotch more tightly:

Boyfriend: "Calm down there babe, I don't want your hand to stink of shrimp and meat"

Me: "You know me, I like your meat"

Boyfriend: "hahahaha... I can't believe we're doing this while I'm driving and farting."

Me: "I can't believe this is heating me up"

Boyfriend: "Don't worry, very soon we will arrive at the apartment *PFFTFTTFTFTFTFTFTFT* and the bathroom"

It was 10 minutes on the road where I tried to ignore my farting boyfriend, in total he farted about 3 before arriving, but it was impossible for me to think of anything other than his tight buttocks vibrating from the air that comes out.

Entering the apartment I try to kiss him and continue releasing the tension, but he stops me and says:

Boyfriend: "Not now, I must visit the bathroom for a moment"

Me: "From 1 to 10, how much do you need to go to the bathroom?"

Boyfriend: "like a 6, but the more time passes the more I will want to"

Me: "That means you'll be able to hold on for a while longer."

Boyfriend: "I don't know..."

Me: "It will be quick, let's go"

Boyfriend: "Okay, I guess I'll hold on a little longer before... *PPPFFTFTTFTF* uuppss now went up to a 7"

We both started to hug each other, I took the first step and started to lower my hand and grabbed his left buttock with passion while he began to kiss me and guided me to our bed where we let ourselves fall without separating our bodies and lips, he began to moan very low shyly while my hand went up his entire back.

*PPPFFFFTFTFTTF*

He stopped kissing me and his face moved away from mine, with a look full of passion and shame he told me: "Babe, I really need to go to the bathroom", I pretending not to have heard him I started to lower my hand again and this time I put it under his underwear touching his bare buttock feeling a little sweat and chills from his big butt.

However, while I was caressing his buttocks he touched my arm and said: 

Boyfriend: "Hey, you just realized you put your hand under my underpants seconds after I fart, didn't you?" 

Me: "I know, but I don't care, you're irresistible."

Boyfriend: "Even if it smells like rotten eggs?"

Me: "Even if you're shit on yourself, I'll love you"

Boyfriend: "Then I'll check if that's true."

He started staring me in the eye as he applied some pressure to my arm and...*PFPPTPTPTPPFPFFTFTFTF* *PRRRR*

I was too surprised, not only by the fact that my biggest wet dreams came true, but also by the fact that I felt a few small drops on my hand, it could be sweat, but I would rather imagine that it was that thick mixture that is cooking in his stomach wanting to come out, and his comment gave me a clue.

Boyfriend: "That was a wet one... I must go to the bathroom"

Me: "But I just showed you that I don't care what your body does while we love each other."

Boyfriend: "I know, but now my desire has gone up to an 8, this is already serious"

Me: "And what would be the problem?"

Boyfriend: "That at any moment I could... make a mess"

For a moment I thought I was taking this too far, maybe he doesn't like this as much as I do, I started to feel guilty about forcing me to do something that my boyfriend doesn't like and dislikes, my lust left my body for a moment and I was about to give my boyfriend "Permission" to go to the bathroom once and for all and maybe continue with this without the factor Farting and diarrhea wouldn't be as interesting, but those thoughts left my head when I heard him say, "But I could take it longer, babe."

He said it with a mischievous smile and eyes full of passion and desire, he put both his hands behind my head and pushed it gently and slowly towards his head, where our lips collided again with even more passion than the first time, now he was the one who began to hug me and caress my back and I innocently wanted to do the same as him and I started to take my hand out of his ass to carry it behind him but he stopped me: "You said you didn't care if I suck right? Then you will NOT take that hand off my ass" and without warning he farted violently and wetly: *PPFPPFPPTPPPTTTTFFFFTFTFT* *PRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR*

I groaned suddenly, even I was surprised and my boyfriend started laughing:

Boyfriend: "hahaha, I can't believe you did that when I farted"

Me: "Don't say stupid things, that was just a mixture of surprise and passion, that fart only surprised me and that's it"

Boyfriend: "Sure?" *PPPFTFTFTFTFTFF* *PPRPRPRPRPRPR* *PFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTTTTT*

I moaned again and was embarrassed to one more, but I felt my boyfriend's hand gently touching my cheek which managed to calm me down.

Boyfriend: "But at least I know you're serious when you say you love me."

Me: "Hahahaha enough of being ashamed"

Boyfriend: "I... *PFTFTFTFT* uffff... I'm serious, I was ashamed"

Me: "Shame?"

Boyfriend: "Embarrassment when I had to play the two while you were in the apartment, I was sorry that you heard or smelled, I always read on the internet that the main reasons for couple separations were because of this type of taboo subject?"

Me: "But why? If everyone does it"

Boyfriend: "It's just that... *PPPFTFTFTFTFTFTTF* aghhh, I think it's up to a 9 now, it's already dangerous at this point"

Me: "You don't have to be ashamed, at least not with me because you already know that I love you no matter if..."

Boyfriend: "I shit on myself... *GRRRRRRRRR* ohhhh stop for a moment... here comes a big one..."

Me: "Don't worry, you know I don't care"

Boyfriend: "I know... aghhh *PPPFTPTPTPTPTFFT* *PPRPRPRRRRRRRRRRR* *PFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFFTF* *PRRRRRRRRRRR* *GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR*"

We both stopped at that moment, he had a face of fear and shame which I didn't understand the reason until I felt a strange thick hot liquid that was where I understood everything.

I immediately pulled my hand out of his butt making it even more muddy, but I didn't do it because I was disgusted but because I wanted to see the mess my hand became when he expelled that rancid diarrhea mixture.

My boyfriend finally reacted to what had happened, he stood up and got out of bed, turned to look at me again, directed his gaze towards my hand with diarrhea and then to my face something shocked, and with shame in his eyes and in his voice he said: "Sorry, I think I measured wrong... It wasn't a 9, it was an 11"

After saying that, he walked making small jumps to take off his underwear with a big brown stain with lumps and once naked he went to the bathroom of our room without closing the door and before sitting on the toilet I took his arm which surprised him and turned quickly.

Let me tell you that it's not the first time I've seen him naked or vice versa, we were a couple after all, but it's the first time that his completely naked body almost gave me a heart attack, his ass stained with brown diarrhea, his big penis and his face of shame but that denotes a little passion made lust take control of my body and caused me to stop him before he released his stomach.

Boyfriend: "Babe, I know we were on to something, but I really have to go *GRRRRRRR* went up to 12"

Me: "I think you could hold on a little longer..."

Boyfriend: "Definitely not!"

Me: "You're a strong man, of course you can"

Boyfriend: "Babe didn't you see my underpants? I literally ruined them!"

Me: "Come on, they're not so bad, I can buy a whole box if you want"

Boyfriend: "I'm shitting, I need the toilet NOW!!"

Me: "And I need you NOW!!!"

The atmosphere became tense, we both screamed in desperation, but I definitely shouldn't have done that for a sexual game, I still wasn't sure if he liked that idea or was even enjoying everything that happened.

We both remained silent, he, even naked, stared at me with a bit of confusion while I couldn't look him in the eye because of how embarrassed he was.

Boyfriend: "Wow that's definitely not you, what's wrong with you, is there anything I can help you with?"

Me: "It's nothing, just that I really wanted to continue..."

He started to approach me slowly and gave me a hug, I felt his crotch harden, although to tell the truth I don't know if it was HIS crotch or mine, and with a soft voice he told me:

Boyfriend: "That has nothing to do with what we were doing, tell me the truth, I don't want to do something that bothers you..."

With shame and a trembling voice he had no choice but to confess.

Me: "This will sound weird or even disgusting to you, and I don't want you to think that about me..."

Boyfriend: "You are a beautiful man, sexy from head to toe and someone intelligent who always makes me laugh in my best moments or accompanies me in my worst moments, nothing you say is going to change my opinion of you or the love I feel for you"

His face slowly approached me and began to kiss me softly.

Me: "You see... I... I like what it's all about... well..."

Boyfriend: "Be confident"

Me: "I... I like it..."

Boyfriend: "Go ahead"

Me: "I LIKE TO SEE PEOPLE HAVE DIARRHEA, IT MAKES ME REALLY HOT TO SEE THEM IN A SITUATION LIKE THAT!!"

Boyfriend: "..."

Me: "It's... a fetish..."

I finally confessed, but... silence says more than a thousand words, doesn't it? He didn't say anything, at that moment I thought his face was one of contempt, disgust and horror, if he were honest and was in his reactionary position the same. I froze, I didn't know what to do, but...

Boyfriend: "hahahahaha..."

Me: "Why are you laughing?"

Boyfriend: "Let's say I have the perfect partner"

He kissed me again, then he moved away and with a funny but gallant look he says to me: 

Boyfriend: "I'm proud that you put your trust in me and that's why I love you, besides, that fetish is called Scat, just so that you are more informed"

Me: "Wait... Are you?"

Boyfriend: "I've never tried it before, but let's just say I'd really like to try it with you love"

This time I started kissing him, I couldn't believe it, he was definitely the perfect man for me... *GRRRRRRRRRRRRRR* He turned his face away from mine and said: 

Boyfriend: "All these emotions made me forget that I had to shit"

Me: "Hey... sorry for going too far, if you want I will leave you alone"

Boyfriend: "Don't you remember what I told you? I would like to try this... and I want you to be my guide"

Me: "Are you sure?"

Boyfriend: "Of course, but you better hurry, if I don't sit on that toilet right now... I think we will have to clean the floor"

I laughed shyly and we both moved towards the bathroom where I wonder: "what should I do now?"

I stopped for a moment, I didn't know what to do either because I had never been in a situation like this and I decided to start with something classic and simple:

Me: "How about something to hold on?"

Boyfriend: "Wasn't that what I've been doing all this time?"

Me: "Yes, but this time you'll push it to the limit, now sit on the toilet."

Boyfriend: "Like orders"

He went straight to the toilet, when he turned his back to me I could notice his big sweaty butt and a slight tightening of buttocks, you could tell from afar that he could barely move and prevent his entire interior from coming out in a violently explosive way.

A cold and short sound indicated that his butt kissed the porcelain, he raised his sexy gaze and looked me straight in the eyes waiting for my next order:

Me: "Just hold on until you can't take it anymore..."

Boyfriend: "Really? No kind of game or something?"

Me: "I'm new to this just like you!"

*GRRRRRRRRR*

Boyfriend: "I think my stomach is new to this too"

Me: "Let me hear your opinion"

Boyfriend: "Okay"

He subtly leaned into the seat, raising his butt as high as he could where he expelled a vibrating and loud fart: 

*PPPPPPPPPPPPPFFFFFFTTTTTT* *PRRRRRRRRRRRRR*

I could see small brown drops shoot out of his butt which at this point was so tight that it could easily break a nut.

Me: "Hey! You're cheating when you're farting"

Boyfriend: "I'm sorry babe, but at this point my body controls itself" 

He made the same motion to let loose an even bigger fart

*PPFPPTPTTPTPTPFFFTFTFTFTF* *PRRRRRR*

I couldn't tell if his little moan was one of pain or enjoyment, but I had no doubt that both parties enjoyed this little experience. I began to approach me:

*GRRRRRRRR* *PFFFFTTTT*

Boyfriend: "Oh! My intestines are burning"

Me: "Maybe I can help you with that..."

I slowly brought my hands closer to his stomach and began to caress him delicately making small circles one at a time.

*PFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFT*

Boyfriend: "Ufffff, I thought that the objective was to make it impossible for me to explode, not to make it easier for me"

Me: "I want it to be a bigger challenge, plus being so close to you I can smell you better"

Boyfriend: "hmmmm~ you really know what you do right?" *PFFFTTT*

Me: "Of course... The smell is amazing, how did you get your stomach to smell like a landfill?"

Boyfriend: "hmm~ I will confess something to you hmm~ in the morning I had a big cup of coffee..."

Me: "Knowing you and your stomach must have been a headache to endure that smell at work"

Boyfriend: *PFFTFTFTFTFTFTFT* "ugh, not at all, I thought I was going to shit about half an hour later, but hmmm~ it just didn't happen"

Me: "Really?"

Boyfriend: "No, it's hard to believe, but since the morning not a single fart came out, and I ate hot wings at lunch"

Me: "That would explain the dark brown color of those drops I saw..."

Boyfriend: "I thought that would make hmmmmm~ *PFTFTFTFT* go straight to the bathroom, but it didn't give a solution *PRRRRRRRRRR* I even heard several colleagues and even the boss destroy the office bathroom"

Me: "I can imagine the desperation of those poor men, but I am aware that out of all of them you would make the greatest disaster."

Boyfriend: "I'm happy I didn't at least touch those bathrooms with hot, sweaty toilet lids"

Me: "And it looks like someone else is happy too, doesn't it?"

His penis was completely erect, apparently the massages relaxed him enough so that the stress goes away and he can enjoy this in a more free and sexual way.

Boyfriend: "Like I told you, I can't control my body" *GRRRRRRRRRR*

Me: "Would you mind if...?"

Boyfriend: "Don't ask and do it!"

I lowered my head directly to his crotch, down there it smelled worse and I could see how the clear water of the toilet had small brown dots indicating that all the farts were wet.

I asked his to get up a little from the toilet, then I put my left hand behind me and started to touch his sweaty butt feeling how my hand gets hotter and hotter thanks to the oven generated inside the toilet.

*PFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTF* *PRRRRR* *PFFTFTFFF* *PPPPFTFTFTFFFFFTTTTTT*

Boyfriend: "oops, I hope it doesn't bother you..."

Me: "~Not at all~"

*GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR*

Boyfriend: "Fuck, I don't think I will resist for long"

Me: "Please, we've had sex longer than this."

Boyfriend: "I don't mean that! I mean my stomach, it's starting to burn."

Me: "Be a man and endure like one"

Boyfriend: "I'll expel everything and we'll continue with this later"

Me: "That wasn't the love deal, and you know it~"

I could smell it, the smell of despair, he began to sweat more and I could feel drops of sweat falling on my hair and arms as he slowly lost control.

*PFTFTFTFTFTFTF* *PFTFTFFFFTFTPPPPPPFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTTTTT* *PRRRRTRRRRRR*

Boyfriend: "hmmmmm~ my stomach hurts a lot, please release me my love"

Me: "No, I want you to break a world record"

Boyfriend: "And I'll break it, but it'll be the size of the largest human excrement."

Me: "In your case they will have to weigh it in liters, by your farts you can tell that it will be liquid"

Boyfriend: "ohhh.... Please *PFTFTFTFTFTFT* I can't anymore... *PRRRRRRRR* More! *TRRRRRRRRRRR*"

Notice how his farts became more and more violent, in a few seconds his stomach will not resist and the great wall of his sphincter will break giving way to the brown army.

Me: "You're sweating a lot..."

Boyfriend: "I know hahaha... but please, I can't resist much longer..." *PFFFTTTT* *GRRRRRRRRRR*

I raised my head and went to his lips and began to kiss him passionately, the atmosphere was heavy, it was very hot and even the smell had flooded the small room. When our lips parted, he said to me: 

Boyfriend: "I'm sorry Babe"

I passed so fast that I could hardly react, the first explosion echoed off the walls and I instinctively lowered my head to see the fireworks on the front page:

*PRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR* *PFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFTFFTTTT* *TRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR* *PSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS* *GRRRRRR* *PFFFFFTTTTTT* *PFFFFFFFFFFFTTFTTF*

He doesn't stop moaning, while from my perspective I can see a large fountain staining the white porcelain of the toilet that I always worry about seeing it clean, but still I don't care at all, I can always clean it at any time, but this doesn't happen again, or at least I've never experienced it before.

*SQHSQHQSHSQHSSSHSHSHSHHHHHHHHH* *PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFTTTTTTTTTTTTTT* *PRRRRR* *PLOP* *PLOP* *PRRRRRRRRRRRR* *TRRRRRRRR* *BLRRRRRSSSHHHHHHH* *PFFFFFFFFTTTTTTTT* *PFFFFTT* *PPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPRRRRRRRRRRRR*

Jet after jet fell impacting the water like a strong hurricane into the ocean, the few solid pieces looked like meteorites causing large explosions of brown water as they crashed into the large polluted ocean.

Boyfriend: "oh... wow, I've never shit like this in my life *GRRRRRRRRR* ughhhh"

*PFFFFFTTFTFTFTFTFF* *PRPRPRPRPRPRPRPR* *SHQHQSHQSHQSHSSSHHSHSHQSHQSHSQQSQQSQS* *FFFFFFFTTTTTTTPPPPPPPP* *PSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS* *SQSTSQRQSRSSSRSRSRQQQRQRQRRRRRRRRRRR*

Me: "I know, it was amazing, don't you think?"

Boyfriend: "Sure"

Me: "Now, do you want me to clean you down there?"

Boyfriend: "Of course"