#just to make other people and happy and satisfied. pretend and everything will magically work out.
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chat does true love exist
#🌙.txt#i don't want to get into too much detail but i'm sitting here crying and genuinely ruminating over this now#i wrote my ocs and their relationships with all of the wishes and dreams i had for my own hypothetical one#was i just naive or an idiot or delusional or had my head too far in the clouds bc this is not it#it doesn't help that my parents come from a culture where you have to put aside your own personal comfort and boundaries#just to make other people and happy and satisfied. pretend and everything will magically work out.#i'm just not that kind of person who can do stuff like that i am incapable of pretending. i would rather eat sand than act fake#sorry for the whiny tags LOL *blows nose*
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RIA I AM GNAWING at the bars of my enclosure, I just finished the last few chapters and JSHDHDHHDJWJWHE <- insane insane insane. I’m going insane. I think this fic has one of the most satisfying conclusions I’ve ever read before like the final battle was SO COOL ?!? Epistolary fics have their limitations yeah but it’s SUCH an immersive storytelling like man I really did feel like I was in a live stream watching the combined forces of hero’s and villains and rebels take down the mayor. And MAN,,, that baletach scene after the dusts clears and he removes his helmet and the shadows surround them was so soft (that turn of phrase is detonating the 2018 cringe meter in my mind but I cannot think of a better way to describe it). I love how although there’s a happy ending, there’s still doubt for what could come in the future, idk it just feels like I’m peering into the social media of some distant city overbroad and feeling wildly confuse. I also LOVE the implication that Freth is like the New York of London of this world with the whole freth-centricism that’s such cool world building. I’m really curious to know whether there’s other cities being plagued with mutants too? Are their heroes elsewhere or is this like a Gotham city where one particular area is just prone to these magical things happening? Anyways so excited to see what more of this universe you’re going to explore :D
HAI HAI thanks for reading! 🥺🥺 I'm glad you like the ending, I was afraid it was gonna a bit too much whiplash from overthrowing the gov -> school setting (while I was writing the fic I felt like it was bouncing between tone every chapter). And I looove calling things/people soft like it's very 🥺🥺
"I love how although there’s a happy ending, there’s still doubt for what could come in the future" SO glad it came out this way for you, this was the tone I wanted. I worked backwards from the Blue Bats arc and wanted a mix of hope/chaos/recovery/uncertainty/but still hope for Lyra and Ben :)
The Frethcentricism was mostly me making a jab at how USA-centric the Anglosphere Internet feels at times 😭 but I would imagine the constant superhero/Mutant news gets aggravating for people who don't care. And it's like Spopera where I get to play pretend and choose which topics are culturally dominant. Freth is an important trade/finance/logistics hub. I can imagine it was historically important due to its location (being on the coast of a continent), then the Mutants appeared, the industries panicked and moved away, but then the heroes showed up, hence Freth had good security and low crime rates in its golden years. Its special status would probably grant it more autonomy from whatever country it belongs to— or perhaps it's a city-state/ in the process of becoming one. I imagine the lack of government transparency + crackdown on civilian protests + startling massacre of heroes pushed away those industries, hence the new gov has to incentivize them to come back.
There is definitely something "magical" about the area itself. Natural Mutants still spawn and will probably come back even if the heroes kill them all (rip LFSA, you were too optimistic about Mutant eradication). Kids from civilian families (eg. Ben) can develop powers out of blue thanks to the "magic". The "magic" doesn't abide by political borders so it's possible for kids in neighbouring areas to develop powers, which leads to conflict because Freth is obliged to take in everyone with powers, but the kid doesn't belong to Freth.
This universe has been bouncing around in my head for quite some time and I feel there's a lot to explore. Lyra's parents being a power couple, Reina's parents, the 826 graduates defecting, Mirage and co backstory, etc etc. I don't know everything lmao and I'm kind of waiting for things to slot into place. I think this universe is addicting because I Don't Know a lot of things but then I start writing and the characters/plot/world reveals itself? If it makes sense? So it makes me really excited to write because yippeeee I'm discovering more about this world :D (and if I don't like something I can just retcon it later lmao)
Thanks for the ask <3
#ask box#answered#dearly beloathed#aaaaaaaaaa 🥺🥺🥺#i think plot is one of my weaker points when it comes to writing so im really happy people like this one :)
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FINALLY read heal thyself as per your recommendation (it's been in my marked for later for months yet somehow I kept forgetting?) and it's just as amazing and beautiful as everyone said, cant believe I haven't read it sooner. There's no real purpose for this ask I just feel the need to gush about it with someone who I know understands😭❤️ but her draco is perfect, his characterization, redemption arc, it's everything I never knew I needed. Reading about his struggle and determination to be good—and finally being able to celebrate the rewards of his hard work was so touching? to witness... I literally had to take breaks because of how much this fic made me feel. Going to spend the rest of the night drowning in astolats fics
Ahh anon your ask got me emo all over again, I love this fic so so much and I’m so pleased that you also felt transformed by it! Sharing this feeling of awe and mutual understanding about a fic with another reader is something really special. HT is hands down the best Draco arc I’ve read in years, which is not surprising if we consider not only Astolat’s talent but also the fact that this fic is 100% Draco-centric and for the most part of it there’s no Harry or romance to distract from his individual journey.
I love how you described his redemption path, the fact that for once he got to make a choice about his own life, then reaped the fruits of his hard work (and how brilliant is that he decides to pursue Healing out of pride and spite? So on brand 😂). I think you chose a perfect word to describe our experience “to witness…” that’s exactly how it felt, a privilege to watch him getting the nuance and character development he deserved. I appreciate that Astolat took the time to explore his arc over the span of a few years, it made his success and happy ending even more powerful and satisfying! I can’t think of a better way to spend the night than reading the rest of her catalogue, you’re in for a treat!
Lol okay you gave me an impossible mission there, I gotta say similar characterizations are very hard to find outside of Astolat’s work, her Draco is very peculiar after all. And I feel like HT is unparalleled way beyond his characterization. I’ve been in the fandom for two decades and have never read anything like it before or since. So leaving any comparison efforts aside I’ll suggest these, which have some of my favorite Draco arcs:
The Compact by astolat (E, 64k)
Hermione frowned. “The real question is why the magic of Britain would be failing now, in fact.”
A Young Radical's Guide to Love by blamebrampton (T, 66k)
Memories of the war are still fresh, which is all the excuse Decent People need to do appalling things. In this quietly waged conflict, Draco Malfoy is happy to be on the right side of things for once, and even happier to find he’s not alone.
Who we are in the shadows by quicksilvermaid (E, 100k)
What happens when you’re forced to become the very thing you despise? Ex-Auror Harry Potter, tossed out of the Ministry for something he had no control over, has been looking for a way back to his former life.
A Thousand Beautiful Things by geoviki (M, 104k)
Draco Malfoy struggles with changed fortunes, shifted alliances, an ugly war, and an unusual spell, with the help of a concerned professor, an insightful house-elf, and an unexpected Gryffindor friend.
What We Pretend We Can't See by gyzym (M, 131k)
Seven years out from the war, Harry learns the hard truth of old history: it’s never quite as far behind you as you thought.
By the Grace by lettered (T, 140k)
Harry is an Auror instructor. Malfoy wants to be an Auror.
And some short fics you might enjoy as well:
And Save Me From Bloody Men by blamebrampton (T, 10k)
Draco Malfoy once watched others fighting to stop the world falling apart. This time, he's not just watching.
Rebuilding Draco Malfoy by khasael (E, 11k)
Draco wants to do something to get his life back on track, but no-one seems to be taking him seriously – until he finds himself in an Auror training session led by Harry Potter.
The Loathly Worm by Selden (E, 12k)
When Draco Malfoy is forced to go undercover among the remaining Death Eaters in the aftermath of the war, the last person he expects to find there is Harry Potter.
Unfinished Business by cupiscent (E, 20k)
Ten years after the War ends, Harry and Draco still haven't got their act together. But maybe it's not too late.
Vortex by xanthippe74 (T, 20k)
Who would want a soulmate who was a schoolyard bully, a Death Eater, and a convicted felon? Certainly not Harry Potter. And Draco is determined to take this secret to the grave.
Slithering by astolat (E, 27k)
Draco found the nest down in the Manor’s cellars, while he was clearing them out.
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Nick of Time [1.1k | M]
Summary: Draco Malfoy is ready to sacrifice everything for the man he loves. Will he find what he's looking for in the nick of time? A gift for @maesterchill, who asked for 'angsty accidental bonding stuff', as a part of the recent round of @drarrymicrofic's Wheel of Drarry exchange. Thank you for the idea and the opportunity to gift something to you, you incredible, talented person!! Thanks, @softlystarstruck for making this 100% better! This fic is inspired by this special version of Bon Iver's cover of I Can't Make You Love Me by Bonnie Raitt. Listen before, or listen along as you read 😊. Read on Ao3
It must be the alcohol.
He’s exceptionally… aggressive tonight. He didn’t even wait for the loo door to close before he shoved me into a wall and started working on my trousers. It’s not really a secret what we do when we slink off together anymore, though.
It’s not like I have any dignity left to lose.
I still remember the first time we did this after that stupid fucking sting operation went sideways and we got in this mess. He was so hesitant like he was afraid to touch me. I guess the worst pain imaginable will compel a man to finally put his hands on the last person on earth he wants to touch.
The last person he wants to fuck.
A quick and dirty shag in a disgusting pub bathroom isn’t exactly what I imagined as a young boy reading stories with Mother about soulmates and magical bonds. Though, I suppose the protagonists of those stories were gallant knights and beautiful princesses, pure of heart and noble of deed.
Merlin knows that isn’t me.
God, I’d be happy for him just to breathe on me willingly. His eyes are so beautiful when they’re all glassy like this, and his mouth tastes sweet, like…
Like pumpkin juice…
*
It’s a dangerous game that I play with myself.
If I close my eyes and push away all of my intrusive thoughts I can pretend, just for a moment, that he’s holding me close like this because he actually wants me.
I can locate the feeling in the very center of my body, the power that keeps us hurtling back toward one another like heavenly bodies trapped on a collision course, caught in one another’s gravitational pull. I can pretend that the feeling is love, and not crude obligation.
The tightening in my belly every time he trails a finger down my spine, the goosebumps parading down my left forearm when he places a gentle kiss there. It’s real, in moments like this, when the air is still and the room is quiet and it’s like we’re the only two people in the universe.
He asks me to stay every time, because he’s good like that, but then he rolls away from me and the void between us feels like it might swallow me whole. So I leave.
Because the reality is he’s holding me like this because he has to, because if he didn’t the pain would devour us both alive.
*
Sometimes…
Sometimes.
We have time. There’s no urgent appointment or family emergency, no back alleyway or friend’s bathroom.
Sometimes it’s just him and me and the inexorable tie that binds us.
A Death Eater, The Chosen One, and a bonding curse fall into bed together…
Those are the worst times.
When we’re just standing there, staring at each other, the space between us too much and not enough. I know, and I know that he knows, that we have a choice to make. Get down to it as usual–clothes off, limbs arranged, efficient but never careless. Satisfying enough to keep the pain away for however long, or–
Sometimes it’s different.
The pain ebbs away like the tide and the pleasure that flows into the vacuum, molasses slow and honey sweet, builds and builds until the both of us are shaking and breathless. Our lips haven’t even touched and we’re still fully clothed and he’s begging. Mouth full of breathy little pleases that he tries to swallow down; hands, hips, heaving chest arching against mine.
And I’m fighting every urge in my traitorous heart to give him everything I have. Every single part of me. Because tomorrow, when the life-or-death fire in our cores has been doused, he won’t want it.
Sometimes he thumbs the tears off of my face and he whispers impossible words into my skin to bracket the goodbye kisses.
*
If I don’t look into his stupid, beautiful green eyes, I think I can do this.
The ache in my core has been growing over the last couple of days–If I tell him now, before it becomes unbearable, maybe I can explain before it becomes too much and we lose control of ourselves. Again.
“I’m..” Shit. No. Close your eyes, Draco. “I’m going to take the potion the healers gave us.”
Did he just sigh? The condescending bastard.
“We’ve talked about this.”
“No, we did not talk about this, Potter. You expressly forbade any conversation on the topic, actually.”
He rolls his eyes and God. He’s so tired of this. Of me.
“Because I’m not going to let you–”
“You don’t let me do anything! I have a bloody choice, too!”
Fuck. Calm down. My heart is racing, and he’s breathing hard, a frown twisting his lovely face. This wasn’t supposed to be an argument.
When is it not an argument with him?
“Yeah. Yeah, you’re right. It’s your choice. Are you sure this is what you want?”
No, don’t laugh, it makes me sound unhinged. Only, I think I am unhinged. He has thoroughly and completely unhinged me.
But how can he seriously ask me if I’m sure?! Am I sure that I want to release him from the burden of this curse? Am I sure that the knowledge that he is free and happy and able to live his life with the person he chooses is worth losing most of my magical core forever?
“I’m sure.”
He’s shaking his head. Why is he shaking his head? Why is he–
“I just…want to be clear.”
He’s…so close. Fuck.
“You’re certain that the idea of being with me is so repulsive to you that you would sacrifice your magic?”
Repulsive? The word is nothing but sound to me when he’s this close and he’s looking at me like that…and I can’t even think…
“What? I–no, no–”
“Draco. You’re telling me–you are literally saying–that you would rather willingly harm yourself than…than just be with me.”
And how could there be tears on his face when I’m the one who feels like weeping? I can’t touch–shouldn’t touch–but I have to reach out and brush my heartbreak from his face with my fingers. He doesn’t deserve to be stained by it.
“Why are you crying?”
“Can I try again?”
I think I’ve forgotten how to breathe.
“Can I try to show you how I feel? One more time. Please? And if you still want…fuck, I can’t even say it…”
“Can you…tell me instead?” Breathe, Draco. “I need you to say it. Please.”
He’s so close.
God, even now that hesitant smile makes me ache. If this is the last I get of him, at least I’ll have this to keep.
“The only pain I couldn’t withstand–”
Oh.
“--is not having all of you, whole, for as long as I can.”
The soft press of his warm lips, as I meet him halfway, feels like a shove back from the precipice, like an exhilarated plunge, hand in hand, into sun-heated water.
Read on Ao3
#wheel of drarry mini exchange#wheel of drarry#drarry#drarry fic#drarry fanfiction#drarrymicrofic#drarry microfic#drarry fanfic
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The Magic Reveal fic we deserve, in which Merlin gets as angry as he deserves to get:
Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5
Don’t get me wrong I LOVE a magic reveal with a Merlin who feels bad about lying. I love a reveal with Arthur being furious and Merlin crying but then they talk it out and all is well. I think it's pretty in-character for Merlin to want to see Arthur come to his own conclusions about magic, without being influenced by Merlin’s opinions
BUT I also kinda wanna see Merlin get angry? Like, why should he feel bad about hiding himself in a kingdom where "himself" gets him nothing but a pyre?? Yeah, he and Arthur are close, but unless you've lived with a secret like that (one that will get you shunned, hated, or even killed) then, and I CAN'T STRESS THIS ENOUGH, it doesn't matter How Close you are with someone, how certain you are that they would never hurt you, or care either way, it will almost ALWAYS be scary to tell them. So like. Let Merlin get angry:
I'd say Arthur has been king for maybe a year at this point. He's still a new monarch, still a lot on his plate, BUT also still plenty of time for him to have repealed the ban on magic, or at least started working on it.
But he hasn't.
Granted he hasn't executed anyone in a while (banishments and prison time are the norm, executions are only used nowadays for high treason). BUT the law still remains, it's still technically punishable by death, to be a sorcerer.
Arthur and Merlin have little hunting trips, when Arthur is getting too stressed and losing too much sleep, when he trains the knights too hard and snaps at even Gaius, Merlin (or sometimes even Leon, if they're both being grumpy arseholes) insists that they leave the city for a day or more, to go hunting.
The council have been told it's so the King can keep up with his fitness, can keep familiar with his lands, and keep his skills sharp (he only has enough time to train with the knights a couple times a week nowadays, a far cry from the several hours he used to do every morning without fail), and that keeps them satisfied.
The Gang (the Knights, Gwen, Gaius, and Morgana (she's good in this because that's what I want let me have this)) know the truth, that sometimes the two of them just need a few days to goof off and be themselves, to finally get some time to relax. They'll grab a couple hares and maybe a stag on the way back if they can, so they can at least pretend that's what they've been doing the whole time.
These trips can last anywhere between a day, to two weeks, and Arthur leaves the same set of instructions with the council and the knights every time:
"The safety of Camelot’s people is your highest priority. I leave Sir Leon in charge of everything to do with the knights, patrol, and should any form of conflict arise. If there is an emergency, you are to consult the Inner Council (I don’t know if that's a thing but let's say it is; its The Gang), and send a squire on horseback to fetch me immediately. There's one boy in the troupe who always manages to track me the down the quickest, so make sure he's the one sent, Sir Leon knows who I speak of."
(He's improved over the years, but Arthur is still very... cagey, when it comes to compliments, and his trust. Leon will never mention it, but the fact that Arthur leaves the safety of the kingdom to him, without hesitation or worry, makes him feel greatly honoured. That is the highest form of trust Arthur is capable of giving.)
~
ANYWAY I feel like most of this has just been backstory so let's get into it:
Normally it's Merlin or Leon who demand that the trip needs to happen.
This time
It's Arthur.
Arthur has tried to ignore it (he's trying to get better but he's not great with emotions and stuff, the big dummy) but Merlin has been in a sour mood for weeks now. He's been quiet and withdrawn, snappy, and has been avoiding Arthur whenever possible.
At first it was easy to ignore, when it started a few months ago it was barely noticeable to anyone who didn't know the two of them Very Well, but in the last few weeks it's become a problem.
Arthur reckons a trip might do them some good. Merlin can relax, and will either get over whatever is bothering him, or be comfortable enough to talk to Arthur about it.
So they head out. Merlin doesn't seem too happy about the trip but he doesn’t complain.
(Odd in itself, if Merlin is unhappy about something he usually makes it known.)
The first couple of days are... odd, to say the least. It seems that every time Arthur notices Merlin relax, he quickly tightens up again. One short, joking conversation is followed by a few more hours of painful, awkward silence.
Arthur comes to the daunting realisation, that if he wants to help is friend (and the love of his life but like... baby blondie has hardly reached that conclusion himself, he might need a bit more time on that) is to confront it head on.
So they're settling down in the evening. The fire is roaring, the horses have been fed and watered, dinner has been eaten, and the two of them are sat at opposite ends of the fire (Very Odd, they're usually glued at the hip, especially when it's just the two of them).
Arthur looks at his friend properly for the first times in a while and he Does Not Like what he sees.
Merlin is visibly exhausted, big bags under his eyes, and his skin paler than normal, scowling ever so slightly into the fire. Shoulders tense, and hands gripping each other until the skin on his knuckles is white. And despite all that, Arthur thinks that Merlin looks more sad, than angry.
Maybe Merlin notices Arthur's staring, they hold eye contact for a little while before Merlin becomes sort of... resigned?? To the fact that he's gonna have to have this conversation whether he wants it or not? He goes to say something but before he can, Arthur interrupts him:
"So Merlin. How do you think I'm doing so far?"
(Which is a stupid thing to say, really. But Arthur is, as we've already established, extremely emotionally constipated, and he figures that finding out what's wrong with Merlin indirectly, and then subtly fixing it behind his back, is a far better idea than asking him to his face.)
Merlin clenches his jaw and looks away it this, his reply and his body language clearly sending different messages:
"You know what I think. You're going to be a great king."
Arthur thinks : "(Going to be? I've been king for a year, there's been no war and far fewer attempts on my life than when I was a prince. There's been a good harvest, all diplomatic meetings have gone well, and more peace treaties, and trade agreements, have been signed in the last twelve months, than in the ten years before it. I know I can still do better but... does Merlin not think I'm good?")
Arthur says : "Going to be? I think I'm a pretty great King already if I do say so myself."
"Then why ask? Besides. There are a few things you haven't done."
Merlin's tone is biting, even though he tries to force it out casually. Arthur notices. ”There are a few things you haven't done”... that means something specific.
"Hmm. I suppose. What things did you have in mind then, Merlin?"
Arthur also tries to sound casual, but the question comes out very pointed
Merlin desperately doesn't want to say it out loud, in fear of revealing too much of himself, so he goes with the vague answer of:
"Promises were made. I guess I just figured you weren't the type to break them, that's all. I'm sure you'll get there in time."
Merlin sounds sort of hopeful there. But the sort of hope that he's been living with for years, the sort of hope that has a layer of sadness and resignation laying over the the top like a tablecloth.
Arthur notices:
"Promises?" He doesn’t want to talk too much or too loudly, in fear that Merlin realises that he's speaking openly and clams up again.
Arthur has realised, over the last year or two, that despite their closeness, despite the endless conversations they seem to have, he doesn't really know all that much about Merlin. He knows he doesn’t spend as much time picking herbs, or in the tavern, as he and Gaius would claim. He doesn't know his favourite colour, or season, or holiday. He doesn't know when abouts his birthday is, or what he likes eating. He doesn't know much about his childhood, he's never mentioned his father.
(Despite all this, he's still in love with the idiot, but again, a revelation for another time.)
Merlin responds "To the druids. You promised they would be welcomed, that magic would return. I know your opinions on magic-"
(The manservant visibly shuffles at this, uncomfortable.)
"-but I figured a promise is a promise. Keeping your word had always seemed so important to you. Before."
Arthur notices the past tense. Like Merlin doesn’t believe that Arthur holds importance to his word anymore:
"I'm not my father Merlin. There have been no executions just for the sake of it since I took the crown."
Merlin’s reply comes quickly, in a harsh tone:
"Yes I know that. But your fathers law still remains. It's technically still punishable by execution just to exist as a sorcerer in your kingdom."
(Arthur notices the thinly veiled disgust in Merlin's voice when he mentions Uther. Arthur knew that Merlin disliked the previous king, but he didn’t think he hated him that much.)
Merlin is getting more and more visibly frustrated at this point. Both at Arthur, and the topic of conversation, but also at himself, for letting himself become so worked up over something he'd sworn to keep Arthur away from.
"You really didn't like my Father did you Merlin?" He says it with a chuckle, trying to keep the conversation light and casual.
(This is NOT a conversation that should be light and casual, his friend is in pain, and revealing more of himself than he ever had before, this should be serious. But Arthur isn't quite sure how to do that, so inappropriately light and casual is what he goes for.)
Merlin responds with a quiet, but forceful:
"I hated him. I still do. He's your father, I know that you're not him, and I know you can't help your heritage. But I'll never forgive Uther for what he did. And I'm not angry that he's...gone."
Arthur's very much taken aback at that. He knows everyone has... strong opinions on Uther, but they've never voiced it in front of him.
"Why?? I mean I know he put you in the stocks a couple of times, but so have I to be fair. Why do you hate him so much?"
(This is the point Merlin gets angry. Or angrier. This is when he stops trying to hide it, stops trying to hold it in. Arthur hadn't gotten angry at Merlin for talking about Uther in such a way, he was just curious. Merlin had been planning on telling him the truth at some point anyway, so he might as well do it now, with no one else around, and Arthur in a goodish mood.)
Merlin jumps up, clenching his fists and staring Arthur in the eye for the first time since the start of the conversation, breathing deeply.
Arthur is taken even further aback at Merlin's sudden unwillingness to hide his true reaction to the topic at hand, but he doesn't say anything, and just waits for Merlin’s response
"Why?? Why do I hate him? Maybe because he was blinded fear and selfish hatred."
Merlin stops and looks away, but doesn't sit down, still tense.
I imagine he's waiting for Arthur to say something, but he doesn’t, opting to wait for Merlin to carry on himself, unwilling to remind Merlin exactly who he was talking to, and about what.
After a few moments of silence, Merlin continues, getting angrier with each word as he paces:
"Your father, the Great King Uther, murdered thousands of people. He committed genocide, because he insisted on blaming other people for his own mistakes. He didn't pay attention to the fine print, and killed his own wife and in return, he executes THOUSANDS of MY people. Just for daring to exist. He was so full of hatred, but he, of course, was infallible so it MUST have been someone else's fault. He was incapable of admitting his own mistakes and the injustice that went unpunished is indescribable, he was a tyrant, and a murderer, and I'll never forgive him."
(Arthur knows the truth about what happened to his Ma in this story, I don’t know how, he just does. And it's a topic of conversation he avoids like the plague.)
At the end of his little outburst, Merlin stills. He is shaking as he glares at the floor, and is more furious than Arthur has ever seen him before.
The King notices the little slip up.
"Your people?" He says, so quietly it's a wonder Merlin hears it.
Merlin freezes at this, at the realisation that there's no real way he can play this off. He was planning on telling him at some point anyway. They're miles away from the city in the middle of a large, barely tamed forest. If he needs to run for his life, he could get away easily enough.
"Yes Arthur. My people. You really should've let me speak first."
Arthur is reminded of the fact that Merlin had opened his mouth to say something, before he'd interrupted him at the beginning of the conversation. It felt like it was hours ago now, but it was really only a few minutes.
The King isn’t nearly as shocked as he thinks he should be. He knew there was something odd and secretive about Merlin, and he'd considered that he might have magic in the early days, but that hadn't been a genuine consideration for years.
He wants to be angry, and selfish, and furious at Merlin for lying to him all this time. But after hearing Merlin’s little speech, does he really have any right to?
Yes, Arthur hadn't executed any sorcerers, but he also hadn't changed the law. He hadn't stood up to his father and he certainly hadn't tried to stop the executions before he was King himself. Can he really blame Merlin? For being scared? For being angry?
"You're a sorcerer." It's not a question. It's a statement. In his mind he knows the truth, but it needs to be confirmed, out loud, by Merlin himself, before they can move the conversation on.
"Yes."
And that's all he says. Arthur waits. And when he's tired of waiting, when he realises that Merlin isn't just gonna carry on talking this time, he speaks up:
"And?"
"And what, Arthur? What do you want me to say? That I'm sorry I lied? Yes, I feel bad for lying to you, but I'll never apologise for protecting myself in a kingdom that would see me burn. And I would do it again in a heartbeat"
Arthur nods. He's tense, but he notices that he isn't scared and he wonders why, after all, as far as he was aware magic had only (almost only) caused him pain and fear.
(In the back of his mind he knows why he's not scared. Merlin doesn't have an evil bone in his body, and he's met the druids, he knows that some magic users are peaceful.)
He looks up at Merlin to see him staring at him, a sort of challenging look on his face, like he was daring Arthur to prove him right. Daring him to be selfish, and angry, and just like his father.
But when Arthur looks deeper. Really Looks at Merlin. He sees the fear, Arthur has no doubt in his mind that Merlin could escape, or even fight him off, now, if he needed to. But Merlin is scared.
If that wasn't enough to break Arthur's heart, the quick glance that Merlin throws to the space a few feet from Arthur's side, is.
Arthur looks over slowly, eyebrows furrowed, to see what Merlin glanced at so fearfully. His heart shatters when he realises what it is. Arthurs sword, sat underneath his bag, just out of his reach. Merlin thinks Arthur is going to kill him. Merlin is scared. Of Arthur.
Arthur looks back at Merlin, disbelief and gut wrenching sadness on his face. He resists the urge to jump up (knowing it would just panic Merlin) as he speaks, trying to keep his tone calming, but it comes out rushed and desperate anyway:
"I'm not going to hurt you Merlin, I swear. I'm...sorry, if my actions and words have led you to believe that I would EVER see any harm come to you."
It's over the last minute, the anger and fear from Merlin, that forces Arthur to realise the legacy he's dealing with. That Uther had done so much damage, had struck so much fear into Merlin, that it didn't matter how close they were. Any subtle, deliberate ignorance of the law wasn’t enough. Any small compliments, or defence of Merlin, wasn't enough.
As long as the law remained, as long as Arthur left his fathers legacy intact, with not even a small attempt to dismantle it, Merlin would be scared of him.
Merlin relaxes only slightly at Arthur's words, gulps, and glances once more at the sword before sitting down again. He’s still tense as he stares into the fire once more.
"All these years you've been putting your life at risk, to stay at my side. You could've quit at any time. You could've stayed in the relative safety of Ealdor, but you didn't. Why? I want to know everything Merlin. You... you mean a great deal to me, and it pains me to see you in fear. And I know it's no one’s fault but my own, and I want to fix it. So the whole story, from the beginning, I want to know."
It's Merlin’s turn to be taken aback now. In his mind, everything he's said and done in the last few minutes should be making Arthur angry. The disrespect of Uther, the tone of voice he had taken, the shouting. All of that even before the admittance of his greatest secret. But still Arthur wasn't angry, he was confused, and maybe hadn't quite processed it yet, but mostly he was just sad, sad that Merlin had to be angry on his own. Sad that Merlin had to be fearful on his own.
So he does. He starts at the beginning. His mother sending him to Camelot so Gaius could train him. Saving Arthurs life that first banquet. Saving his life again a few days later. And again. And again. And again
He talks about all the small insignificant magicks he did: cheating at dice games and keeping Arthur's bath water warm and making sure the fire stays lit through the night and helping the knights sleep when they're out and about.
He talks about all the big magicks he did: killing Nimueh and being the last Dragon-Lord and Balinor being his father, and all the great battles he had won and all the times he'd saved Arthur when Arthur hadn't even realised he'd been in danger.
He talks about everything in between. About every lucky fallen branch and every lucky rockslide and every lucky solution that wouldn't have worked without Merlin... nudging it in the right direction.
He talks and talks and talks until his throat is sore. And Arthur stays silent, unwilling to interrupt, listening intently and saving any questions and queries until the end.
After an hour or so, Merlin hesitates, but Arthur can tell that there's something else. Something he's not saying. Something that in Merlin's mind, is the scariest truth of all. So he stays silent, and waits for Merlin to continue:
"The old man that you think killed your father. Dragoon, the sorcerer who kept popping up but was never in the same room as me? That was me, in disguise."
He looks nervous at this and looks up at Arthur. Before, he'd been explaining everything with a blank but resolute look on his face, still staring into the fire (that hadn't been fed in well over an hour, but was still going strong).
Arthur just looks surprised, he'd never considered that Dragoon had been anyone but himself.
"I tried Arthur. I may have hated your father but I tried to save him. But the pendant around his neck stopped it from working and healing magic has never been my strong point anyway. I really did try."
Arthur nods at this. He figured there had been no reason for the old sorcerer to kill his father, and after consulting Gaius and realising the truth about the pendant, he didn't blame him. Though he never told anyone, not even Merlin, why would he? His manservant had never even met the guy.
"I know. I'm sorry, it can’t have been easy, thinking I blamed you for his death all these months. I'm sorry Merlin."
Merlin looks surprised but quietly grateful. Over the course of the last hour of explanation he had slowly become more and more relaxed, realising that Arthur really meant it when he said he wasn't going to hurt him, and just wanted the truth.
Merlin was still scared, and a big part of him still believed he'd probably be banished at the least at the end of this conversation. But it still felt good to get it off his chest.
"But you still haven't answered my question. Why? We didn't know each all that well those first few weeks. Months even. We practically hated each other at the beginning. But you stayed anyway. Despite hating me and despite being in constant danger. Why?"
Merlin once again hesitates at this. He tried his best but even after all these years, he's not quite sure how to navigate conversations about destiny, especially his own, and especially how it's tied so intrinsically with Arthur’s.
Instead he says:
"What do you know about Emrys?" He really needs a starting reference for this part of the conversation, and at this point, the best way to get it is to ask directly.
Arthur goes to question why, but Merlin has been nothing but honest and straight forward with him, so he trusts that it’s important, and answers truthfully:
"Not much. A few Druids have mentioned him to me before. Apparently they've been seeing him in prophetic dreams for centuries, the Druids have quite a few "seers" in their ranks. He's meant to be some great sorcerer, whose destiny it is to bring Magic and peace to Albion, with some King or other at his side. I never payed much attention to it, I hardly believe in visions of the future."
Merlin nods at that:
"You've got most of it. Emrys is meant to be the most powerful Warlock to ever walk the earth, past, present, and future. When Uther started culling sorcerers, an astronomical amount of magic was poured back into the earth all at once. The Triple Goddess took that magic and put it all in one place, in one unborn baby, in the hope that said baby would grow into his power, and restore balance and compassion to the world. The Druids call him Emrys but it's just a title, like King, or Sir, not his real name. He, and the Once and Future King, are meant to rule with the support of one another, uniting all of Albion under the King’s rule, and bringing magic back into the land. Emrys and the Forever King, two sides of the same coin, their destinies interwoven."
Merlin goes silent at that, and Arthur thinks he knows where this is going, but he Needs the confirmation:
"What's that got to do with anything?" is quietly muttered.
"You're the Forever King Arthur. And I am Emrys. Though it's weird enough when the druids call me that so just... let's stick with Merlin alright?"
"All those times you said I would be a great King, all those times you had unfailing faith in me, was because of destiny?"
Arthur tries not so sound hurt, but he’s never cared for, or believed, in destiny. Up until now he'd thought Merlin had had faith in him as Arthur, his friend, not as some prophetic Once and Future King that Arthur was afraid he would never be.
"At first, sure. I was angry, that my destiny had been decided for me. That I couldn't just ignore it because if I did then the world would never know peace. I never asked for that responsibility I just wanted... I just wanted to keep my mother safe. I wanted to learn how to be a physician and use my magic to help and entertain and brighten the world. Just a little bit. And suddenly I had this big important role to play. I hated it. But I did it anyway, kept you safe. And then I got to know you as a person and you weren't your father. You Love Camelot, you Love your people, you're a good man who does everything in his power to help those around him, even if they don't deserve it sometimes. And suddenly, having my destiny be to help you to greatness... well, it didn't seem so bad anymore. Maybe it was your destiny to be that Great King from prophecy, because you were already a good man."
Arthur is speechless at that. Tears gather in his eyes but neither of them mention it and he doesn't let them fall. Merlin had been almost as nice as that in the past, but never so fully, and with the weight of the truth behind it, it seemed much more meaningful.
Merlin gives him a sad smile before he continues:
"I'm your servant until the day I die Arthur. I have faith that one day, you'll do the right thing."
Arthur suddenly remember the whole point of this conversation. That Merlin was upset and angry that he hadn't repealed the ban on magic yet, that Merlin was still waiting on him. Waiting on him to do the right thing. Waiting on him to fulfil his destiny.
~
Maybe they head straight home? Merlin walks into Arthur's chambers the next morning to find him already up and pacing, making a start on the repeal?
Maybe Arthur demands they go to the closest Druid settlement so he can consult them on how he should go about it? Merlin’s knowledge of magic is great and all, but neither of them were alive before the purge, neither know how it would work practically.
All I know, is whenever Merlin first comes across Arthur working on the repeal, determination in his eyes, he cries a little. That everything he sacrificed is finally paying off.
I also know, that the first time Arthur timidly asks Merlin to show him something magical (maybe that's straight after this tiring conversation, or maybe its days later, back in the safety of Arthur's locked chambers) Merlin cries even harder, Arthur is still scared of magic, how could he not be. But he loves and trusts Merlin more than anything in this world, and he wants to learn to not be scared anymore.
~
THIS IS COMPLETED!!
All 5 parts have been posted:)
If y’all want my thoughts on anything specific, let me know✌
#merthur#bbc merlin#merlin#merlin/arthur#magic reveal#good morgana#knights#sir leon#sir gwaine#sir elyan#sir lancelot#sir percival#gwen#guinevere#gaius#arthur is gay but stupid#merlin is gay but stupid slightly to the left#morgana#merthur headcanon#angry merlin#bamf merlin
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☆ genre: fluff
☆ pairing: hwang yeji x reader
☆ summary: it’s the day of your first art exhibition and yeji isn’t there to hold your hand
☆ word count: 1.8k
Your fork clattered onto your plate, your hand trembling as you took in the news that your girlfriend, Yeji, wouldn’t be able to make it to your art exhibition tomorrow. You had been so excited and proud to share your artwork with her, having spent a long time on the specific piece being displayed. The display that she would never see.
She stared at you with eyes full of sadness, moving to take your hand in hers. You were still frozen, your lips shaking as you tried to stop the oncoming tears that were making their way to the corners of your eyes.
“Y/N, I’m so sorry. I really did everything I could, but we are just so close to our comeback that I can’t miss anything.” Yeji’s voice was soft, almost as if she was afraid you might break if she raised her tone. You squeezed your eyes shut, begging yourself to get a grip on your emotions. You needed to calm down, afterall this really wasn’t that big of a deal.
“No…. No, it’s fine. I promise. Sorry, I guess it’s just been a weird day.” That was a lie. Your day had actually been really good (up until now), but Yeji didn’t need to know that. If lying was what it took for her to feel a little less guilty about the situation, then you would lie until the sun began to rise in the morning.
“Will you take pictures? I still want to see everything, and I want to hear about everything. I promise, the minute I come home, I’m all yours,” Yeji said, giving you the smile that always managed to warm your heart and bring you a little bit of solace.
“Won’t you be tired from practice?”
“Too tired for my beautifully talented partner? Never.” You giggled weakly at that comment, feeling a small smile make its way onto your face. You were still upset, still cursing the fact that you couldn’t have Yeji there for something so important, but you knew that she meant every word she said about staying up to listen to you recall your experience.
“Okay. I love you.” Yeji lifted your hand and pressed the smallest kiss onto the back of it. You felt your face heat up as she smiled at you, continuing to hold your hand while grabbing her silverware with the other one, determined to give you comfort in her touch, even if it was only the smallest sliver of happiness.
The next morning, after a quick breakfast with Yeji, she headed off to do some outfit fittings while you headed out to do last minute checks on your art before it was taken to the small gallery the event was taking place at. Your teacher was already waiting in the classroom, your canvas sitting on an easel.
You took one last look at the piece in front of you, of the watercolors that splashed together on the canvas to create the perfect image, before you let the black cloth drop over it. Your teacher gave you a smile as she patted you on the back.
“It’s going to look great at the exhibit tonight, Y/N. Just you wait,” she reassured. You gave her a soft smile, though you couldn’t get rid of the pit that sat in your stomach. After all, the one person who you wanted to see the piece most wouldn’t be able to make it.
You knew that it wasn’t Yeji’s fault; that it was the price that you paid for dating an idol. You would simply have to get used to the fact that she wouldn’t be available all the time, and that you would simply have to do certain things alone, even if you wanted nothing more than to hold her hand while doing them.
Upon leaving your classroom, you headed straight to your apartment. As much as you would have loved to sit and mope around til the time came for the exhibit, you knew that getting ready would take much longer than you wanted. Afterall, this wasn’t a simple class gathering, this was a public art exhibition, and you wanted to look your best for the masses.
After showering and spending about half an hour wrapped in a towel looking at your phone, you finally decided to get ready. You sent a quick text to Yeji, wishing her luck on their practice tonight, before throwing your phone gently onto your bed and focusing on getting yourself presentable.
It wasn’t until you were on the way to the exhibit that the nerves began to set in. This was your first time showing art to such a big group of people, and you hoped that they would find it as beautiful as you did. Despite the reassurance from Yeji and your teacher prior to this moment, you still found your finger nervously tapping the steering wheel as you tried to get your heart to stop pounding.
This was right about the time that you would have loved to have Yeji’s hand to hold, to squeeze, to ground you and let you know that everything was okay. But unfortunately, it was just you.
Your anxiety only worsened as you walked into the gallery. It wasn’t your first time here, and you usually loved visiting, but for some reason you couldn’t find it in you to step into the gallery knowing that your art was on the wall, waiting to be seen and critiqued.
You squeezed your eyes and pretended that Yeji was beside you, calming you down. You imagined her hand gently rubbing circles on your back, and it felt so real that you almost got chills as her hands moved from your back down to your hands. You could practically feel the weight of her palm in yours, and you squeezed lightly. You felt your eyes shoot open in surprise as her hand squeezed back, except it was too real to be just in your head.
You turned your head quickly, your breath catching as Yeji smiled from beside you. She looked gorgeous, in a simple skirt and a nice blouse, but she looked so much more magical to you. Your mouth opened in surprise as she smiled giddily at you, pulling you into her embrace. In no time, your hands were wrapped around her petite waist, holding her close as you felt the urge to cry again, this time with happiness.
“I thought you said that you couldn’t make it,” you said, pulling back to make sure you weren’t dreaming. Her laugh filled your ears and you were certain that, no you weren’t dreaming, you were just dating the most perfect girl to ever exist.
“I managed to talk my way out of practice. I owe our choreographer dinner, but it was more than worth it to be here.”
“But, you shouldn’t miss practice! Your comeback is soon and this is something so small, it really doesn’t matter that much.” Your voice trailed off as Yeji squeezed your hands again. You looked at her, your heart melting at the soft smile that was on her face, along with the look of complete adoration in her eyes.
“But it matters to you. If it matters to you, then it is the most important thing in the world. I know that you were looking forward to showing me your art, and you support me all the time, it’s my job to do the same for you,” she explained, her voice warm and steady. Your arguments died in your throat as you let your joy spread to your face, a smile breaking onto your features. You hugged her again, quicker this time, before pulling her into the exhibit.
You walked around, observing the art and talking about the different artists and techniques used, until finally you came to your piece. Yeji let go of your hand, her eyes wide as she walked closer to it, as if in a trance, while you watched from the sidelines with a smile on your face.
Splashes of neutral colors were painted onto the canvas, the watercolor causing the paint to flow from one color to the other. A large tree stood in the background, the brown standing out against the black and gray night sky. Warm white lights were painting along the branches of the tree, the watercolor allowing them to look as though they were truly glowing steady and bright. In the middle of it all was a beautiful girl, your muse. She looked off into the distance, her sweater pulled up above her palms as she held them to her face for warmth. Her brown hair flowed around her shoulders, perfectly messy in the way that only the girl could pull off.
To anyone else, the painting might have looked simple: a girl by a tree at night. But Yeji instantly recognized the photo. It was one of your favorite photos that you had taken a few months into your relationship with Yeji. You had it as your phone wallpaper, and you always gushed about how the picture captured Yeji’s subtle beauty in the best way; you even said this was the night that you knew you truly and wholeheartedly loved Yeji.
Yeji turned to you, tears in her eyes as she looked back at the portrait, and then back at you. She rushed to you, pressing her lips to yours as she tried to convey all the love that she held for you. You kissed back, your own way of letting her know that you loved her too, and that this picture was just one way of how you showed that.
When she pulled away, she was giggling happily, a single tear streaking down her skin. You brushed it away with your thumb, smiling at her fondly.
“It’s me. You painted me,” Yeji said, her voice trembling as she smiled that smile that made her look just like a little kitten. You kissed her nose, nodding as you pulled back.
“Of course I did. You’re a work of art. I’m glad you think I captured your essence. I was worried you’d think I didn’t do you justice.” Yeji scoffed at your statement, rolling her eyes playfully.
“Didn’t do me justice? Y/N, you’ve painted me like an angel. You’ve done me the most justice than anyone could ever do,” she rambled, which caused you to laugh. She turned back to look it over again, before pulling out her phone to take a picture. Soon, she was typing away furiously, a mischievous smirk on her face. You raised an eyebrow as she tucked her phone back into her purse, a satisfied grin replacing the smirk as she took your hand again.
“What did you do?”
“I sent it to the Itzy groupchat. What kind of friend would I be if I didn’t rub it in their faces that my partner made a masterpiece of me?” You laughed at her statement as she chuckled along with you.
“Now come on, I want to see the other art. Though, I doubt anything is gonna top yours.” You rolled your eyes softly, but couldn’t help but smile as she pulled you along gently, her hand in yours.
Just the way it was meant to be.
#hwang yeji#itzy yeji#yeji imagines#hwang yeji x reader#yeji x reader#itzy#itzy imagines#itzy x reader#iitzy scenarios#itzy oneshot#itzy fluff#yeji fluff#hwang yeji fluff#hwang yeji imagines#itzy yeji imagines#itzy yeji fluff
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Birthday Cake
A/N: Suprise folks!!! *me laughing maniacally* The whole scenery for this fic somehow appeared in my head and I just COULDN’T let it slip away, so... My biggest inspo for that was @drawlfoy!! Remember her posting the fic where Draco and Reader work at McDonald’s and are total suckers in their job (arguing with the customers; preparing wrong orders; etc.)? Dee unfortunately, deleted this precious, but it’s stuck to my head ever since (lol lol, it’s the moment where Dee wants to get rid of something, but I kindly remind everyone it existed). Therefore I present to you the next Draco x Reader fic related to our fav fast-food rest. This time, however, they’re not working at the same workplace but... I'm going to stop here cuz I don't want to spoiler :P
**The second thing that triggered me to write this fic is the YouTube video I recently saw with a lady who orders the 'specials' appearing to be out of the menu list of McDonald’s, through the Drive-Through. She asked for a birthday cake, was laughed at a few times, but eventually got what she wanted. Applause for the attitude!!
About the fic (context, my bitches): ofc it’s the modern AU, non-magical world. Draco’s the worst boyfriend ever but always manages to turn things into their righteous place.
Summary: The birthday is upcoming, and Draco is in a rush to think up an idea for a perfect gift. His ingenuity fails, however, and leaves Y/N very unsatisfied with a disaster that has been forged.
Word Count: 3.6k
Warnings: my brain playing a total psycho, language, alcohol, sexual undertones/allusions to sex, Pansy being too much of her self... deal...
Tags: @drawlfoy @eltanin-malfoy
Such an unrestrained desire to strangle somebody you hadn't felt in a long time.
Really.
Today was your birthday, which you had been widely announcing for almost a whole month to people you might have accidentally forgotten about it. Having your boyfriend, Draco, on your mind in particular.
You doubted he would have the guts to omit your big day, though as repeatedly as he had done for a few years back. But something between foresight and the second sense of prevention told you to keep reminding him every day of the upcoming event, with a heap of birthday-themed emojis and uppercases in the messages.
Everything was planned out in your head: him picking you up from your house with the sharp-red cabriolet that he used only for special occasions; him driving the two of you to the fanciest restaurant he could find in town; him bestowing you with a nice-looking, golden necklace or a different piece of jewelry you had been suggestively pointing out in the store's exhibition; him booking up a hotel room for you two to celebrate.
Either way, that was much beyond your expectations, as it turned out. And now you were sitting in the front yard of your house, waiting for him to show up.
'If he was going to at all.' This thought invaded your mind for the last hour, try as might to subdue it. An hour you had been sitting tight, hoping it was only a delay caused by a traffic jam or other irrational explanation he could come up with. But you were deceiving yourself, you eventually presumed -- you had been checking up your phone every one minute, only to see if any message notification popped up on the screen, other than birthday wishes from friends who actually cared for you.
2.02pm: Nothing.
2.03pm: Susan 'Happy birthday bitch!'
2.04pm: Instagram notif. (Someone liked your photo, which you had posted before leaving your room, posing in front of the mirror in the best cocktail dress you could find in the wardrobe.)
2.05pm: Nothing yet again.
2.06pm: Still... Peace and quiet.
"Fuck it...Enough," you muttered under your breath, an annoying disillusionment falling like a heavy mile stone on your chest. Tears suddenly started sprinkling in your eyes at the regret, and you were very reluctant to admit that your friends were right -- Draco Malfoy was an egoistic, negligent, self-absorbed pri--
"Hi." You heard the raspy, panting voice says. "Sorry for the delay."
You blinked slowly, stupidly. You raised your head to assure yourself it was him. That his expression actually corresponded to his words and showed some kind of remorse for standing you up. But no... There he was: standing in front of you, plainly confident and unashamed, with his cocky smirk provoking you to slap him.
Oh, how much you craved to slap him right now. "Where to the fuck have you been?"
"I've tried to pick this up," he explained, simultaneously lifting up the paper bag he'd been carrying in his hand. The big, exclaiming letters 'McDonald's' with the brand's logo were printed on its exterior, and it was fully stuffed with something inside.
Not quite comprehending, you furrowed. You attempted to hide the venom in your voice, but somehow it found its way to leak out. "Couldn't you do that in advance?"
"Nope..." It was his turn to furrow, looking almost shocked with the question. And thanks to all those years of your relationship, you knew it was his piss-poor estimation of time taking over. "It was a last-minute surprise."
"Sounds like it," you commented irritably. "What's that?"
"Your birthday present, sunshine," he drawled happily, ignoring your remark. He sounded positively delighted and satisfied with himself at surprising you with that because he saw a slight crease of shock painting on your forehead. "Here you go."
You took his deposit out of his grasp, still quite unsure. What if his gift would only make a situation worse? Can it get any worse with Draco's total lack of tact? Yes. But it was only one way to find out.
Without even stealing a second glance at him, you ripped off all of the packaging that had been folded around, protecting the contents. You tried to do it carefully and without any impact of emotions revealing the way you felt inside, but your hands were shaking with rage, and you couldn't quite contain yourself. You had been highly aware you shouldn't have expected much from him, but still...
You wondered if the universe was playing against you.
There was a moment of tense silence as you struggled to deal with all the wrappings. Rather unfortunately, you wished you hadn't put so much effort in opening your so-called 'gift' because as you finally did, it only angered you more, seeing as the disappointment laughs at your face. And yes, as a matter of fact, the universe was against you today...
"Are you kidding me?" you asked in disbelief, fury reappearing in your eyes. "A birthday cake?! From McDonald's?" Ugly, little cake with the creepiest smiley face of a clown. It wasn't even fresh, you realized, when you smelled it and felt a musty reek of a freezer, it probably had been kept in. A confusing sense of sadness in your chest couldn't reach any higher at this point.
"Don't you like it?" he asked, detecting the wrath in your eyes. At that, you felt the dumbest urge to laugh and never stop. "I thought it'd be something original."
"Oh, I love it," you said sarcastically, a faint voice of hope telling you it was only a very bad joke was still lingering in your head. But it wasn't a joke.
"It's not just--" He struggled to form a coherent sentence. "I've been asking Blaise and Theo about any ideas. I told them, what you had said to me -- 'you didn't want anything fancy.' So we decided it's... something."
"Of course I didn't tell you I want anything, you dolt!" Your voice raised up almost two octaves, and the pulse sped up so fast it entailed a headache along. A neighbor from the opposite garden who was watering the flowers looked at you, startled, and eyes widened your exasperated tone. You didn’t care. "It's how it works: you don't tell other people you expect them to buy something!"
"But I'm your boyfriend. You shouldn't -- er-- feel uncomfortable to tell..."
"Exactly! As my boyfriend, you should have known!"
"Well... I didn't. If that's what's bothering you, we can...we can..."
"Stop." Listening to him and his pathetic excuses was the last thing you were going to do now. "What – why would you even – " You sputtered out, unable to process or express exactly what you were feeling. There was definitely anger and indignation. Curiosity, for another, as to why Draco would even fall for such foolish and ill-considered idea, and -- to the top of it -- hope it would make a good fit. And possibly, the last and most satisfying part, was the wicked impulse to throw the cake directly into his arrogant face, letting him taste his own medicine he had been serving you for years on each failed birthday.
"You know, for once, you could pay more effort and try doing something nice for me," you told him firmly, deflating to calm down your buzzing nerves.
"I've been tr--"
"Do you realize how much it costs me to pretend to be happy when you forget about me? Last year, I organized a big-ass party for your birthday, inviting over all of your friends and buying the best booze I could find to celebrate it properly," you said harshly and pretentiously, as you intended. "The best part is, you didn't even thank me." You stared at him, wringing your hands and expecting to perceive any trope of shame in his eyes. For the first time, you actually did.
"Listen, about that--" he calmly attempted to cut off your monologue.
"No, you listen..." Did you really want what was upcoming next? Maybe it was about time. "Today, I decided I'm standing up for myself. So, for the last time, get out from my porch."
He bristled, the thunderstruck air hanging around him. "Because of the stupid cake?"
"What?! No! It's just... I feel like you don't give a damn about me anymore." Gulp formed in your throat, and the tears finally left your eyes at the consciousness of what was happening. "I think we both deserve some time."
Your eyes moved to his, and you almost wished you hadn't looked. He was watching you, with pursed lips and a pure mixture of every emotion: anger, sadness, resentment, pretension, dejection. The faintest of his flustered blushes appeared on his cheeks, and you suddenly wished you could hug him. "So you are putting us..." His finger pointed at him and you as if expecting clarification. "...on a break? Is that what it is?"
You were truly torn, to be honest. Becoming single on your birthday was the last wish you had for this day, but you felt a strong sense of adequacy and pride for building up the boundaries of tolerance. Besides, seeing as it was heading nowhere, it was only a matter of time that your relationship came to an end.
Although, it hurt. A lot. "Yes."
You darted your eyes from him, not wanting to study his reaction in case it caused you to meltdown and jump to his embrace, apologizing endlessly for your words. You loved him. But you didn't regret what you had just said.
Something like a dry chuckle of disbelief escaped out of his mouth. "Is that what you really want?"
'No,' your thoughts prompted you instantly before you could even contemplate. 'I want you to say so many things you're never willing to say. But you don't know.'
So instead, you lied: "Yes."
All expressed, you spun around without peeking back and rushed into your room, already knowing there was no more sense in strives to make this day any better; all of it would bring only bad associations. It would be depressing, even more than it already was.
God, was it how the break-up pained? Because if so, you wanted to be deceased. The world spun suddenly, and you sank to your knees, shaking madly and doing your best to find your way back to your bed, located a few mere meters from you. Part of you felt numb, but your head was wide awake and alarming you that something in terms of a disaster had just happened. Because it did. The clutching in your chest was unbearable, and tears were dashing out of your eyes like a living waterfall, which made you bury your face in your hands. Never have you ever wanted to be so drunk before.
And so many questions rung up in your head at once.
Did you make a good decision? What if you are going to miss him, yet knowing you could never call? What about college -- are things about to get awkward?
No answers.
But you knew someone who would be able to reply to them.
With the blurred by tears vision, you struggled but managed to find your phone in the purse, and then clumsily scrolled through and tapped in your list of contacts before holding the phone to your ear.
Please answer, you begged. Please, please…
"HAPPY BIRTHDAY!" Pansy's voice roared from the other side of a line, as always, enthusiastic.
"Pansy." You tried to sound less brokenly than you were, feeling marginally worse at the reminder of your birthday. "Is Daphne around?"
"Ouch, you're a really nasty bitch sometimes, you know. I'm not goin' to point out today, but since you didn't let me end my wishes, I'll note that for the future reference." You were sure she was grinning at the teasing, seeing as much as she liked that. Normally, you wouldn't mind, but... "How--"
"Pansy, please..." you sobbed out, almost desperate to have someone to consult and share emotions with. Daphne -- contrary to Pansy, who could be very judgy sometimes -- was someone you had especially on mind now. "I need to talk to her."
You heard her sigh; the kind of sigh she used to either prove her resignation or concern. But, as much as it surprised you, she suppressed her curiosity and, without a second word, obediently handed the phone over to Daphne. At least, that's what you assumed because you heard a pause and subdued mutters in the background.
"Y/N?" the milder tone spoke up, and you felt suddenly very strange as if submerged in water of relief; relief to hear the familiar voice. That released you from keeping a distant attitude, and yet again, a sadness washed over you, triggering a loud wail to come out of your mouth. "Y/N, is everything alright?"
"No..." you sniveled, unable to collect yourself together. "I-I... We br-brok-e up."
"You and Draco?" Daphne asked, astonishment evident.
You nodded but then remembered she couldn't see you nor read your expression. So instead, you forced your vocal cords to work again. "Mhm..."
"What happened?"
Restoring the story in your brain again, you told her everything, still tearfully but much more coherently this time. You avoided the details, briefly skipping from one utterance to another, as your conversations had gone, and you were very much thankful she didn't press for more information about the prospect of the situation. If it hadn't been her sporadic gasps or loud inhales of breath, you would have almost presumed she wasn't listening. However, she was, and as soon turned out, Pansy was as well.
"That's bananas!" Pansy shouted somewhere from the back as you had ended, and despite your gloom, you giggled quietly at her comment.
"Shush," Daphne tried to silence her, covering up the fact she had put you on the speaker. You didn't mind because you knew Pansy, who would definitely expect Daphne to cite the whole conversation if needed. But knowing Daphne as well, you could bet she flushed more than she would want to at that point. "So it all started because of the cake?"
"And the delay," you added. "But it's not just about that, obviously. It feels like... he completely stopped caring. And I don't want to be stuck in a relationship where everything is about sex and having fun only. Draco wasn't looking for a commitment, which..."
"Sucks,"ended this time Pansy unhesitatingly, who wasn't now screaming from the other part of a room but openly participating in the discussion.
"Yeah," you agreed.
"As for me, I think he might love you more than you know, Y/N." It was Daphne talking again, and she sounded positively convinced about her view as for someone who had hardly exchanged any word with Draco for the past few years. As if reading your thoughts, she continued. "I've observed you a lot. I know he might seem unemotional, but it's you who discovered him. That must require a lot of trust, you know."
You contemplated, and some of the memories and images from your first encounter run across your brain, try as might to suppress it: spotting each other at the party; binging some whisky shots together; flirty teasing; the very masculine scent of cologne; and then... more spicy recollections -- eager lips pressing against each other; against each others' necks; against other parts of the body; stripping off the clothes in the passionate haste...
Receiving a long moment of silence, Daphne took a second chance and asked. "And what's with you? Do you want to end it?"
It felt like standing before the oracle of truth. Therefore, you couldn't deny it in front of yourself. "No."
"So what're you still doing there?" commented Pansy impatiently, and you could imagine her rolling the eyes. "Get out and find him!"
She was right. You will.
XOXOXOXO
"I thought I'd find you here..."
No. Actually, you didn't.
You had tracked Draco's phone with your own one with some help of an app that, as the two of you had established still in the relationship, would be a good idea in case of an emergency. That in itself proved to be more than helpful, believing that your argument may be pinned as something in terms of an emergency, right?
So having access to his location, you had found out he was in the park where he had taken you on the first date, shortly after dinner, to watch the sunset that, as he had described, 'was a typical cliche from every romantic movie.'
But you had fallen for that. So much.
You hadn't been aware the place had actually some meaning for him until now, and that... God, that he had even remembered it. Time showed, however, that it indeed did, to which your heart reacted with a happy jolting. But also with a nasty sting of nostalgia following shortly after.
Yet, that only had encouraged you to make up your mind and go looking for him, which hadn't been such a difficult task per se. He was sitting on the bench, in the shade of a tree, and hiding his a little too delicate skin from the sun rays. As soon as he had heard your voice, his gray eyes flew up to see you standing a few meters away.
"What are you doing here?" was the immediate question that tumbled out of his mouth. He arched his eyebrow, and to your surprise, he didn't even look angry or sad with you. Nothing near the edge; actually, almost something like the amusement was painting on his face.
"Aren't you mad with me?" you asked intrigued, completely forgetting about his question.
He frowned. "Why would I be?" His tone was so mild that you weren't sure if he was referring to the double meaning; but then he smirked playfully and said, "Besides, I knew you were coming."
"Wha-- How?" you asked, eyes dilating a fraction, in shock.
He smirked, pointing at his phone in an explanatory manner. After a moment, you finally figured out what he meant: the app must have registered he had been tracked and that your phone was trying to find his. At this notice, you reacted with a wave of flush, suddenly regretting your previous lie. His smile only widened at your expression. "Wanna sit? It's plenty of room here."
"Mhm..." You nodded, pleased to accept his offer, and walked over to the bench, doing your best to hide the evident embarrassment on your face. You felt strange he had taken you with such ease, seeing as merely two or three hours ago, you had burst at him like a cram-full volcano of unspoken emotions.
Draco shifted a package from his side, making more space for you to sit, and it took you a moment to realize it was a McDonald's cake from earlier. Everything started from that -- a stupid, little piece of cake which stood up between...
You shook the thought away, taking a seat next to him, close enough to smell his sandalwood cologne. "You didn't answer my question," Draco reminded you. "What's so important to make you track my phone?"
"I'm sorry, okay?" You rounded your face to him, flustrated, leaning at the backrest of a bench. "That's why I came. I wanted to apologize."
"Oh... Couldn't you call?"
You sighed. "I figured you wouldn't want to talk to me after...you know... our quarrel," you said half-despondent, half-desperate, watching your feet as if it were the most interesting thing to peer at now. "I didn't mean what I said earlier."
"I know," he said. Out of nowhere, he was gently grasping your palms which forced you to look up directly into his intense gaze. His eyes were swirling like molten silver at you. "But I should be apologizing, love. I made a mistake, okay?" His hands traveled all across to your tense shoulders, squeezing them lightly. "I know I should be more... affectionate with you. And this was...dumb. A dumb mistake. With that cake. But I'll try to be better if you give it another shot."
He looked so serious that you instantly believed him. You wanted to actually, with all force of longing, which grew up too rapidly in you when he wasn't around. Draco was a fool, you could easily say. But he was your fool, which was a thing you couldn't be more proud of.
Peeking slowly in the other direction, you asked, out of the topic, "You remembered the place?"
"Of course," he puffed jokingly, smiling. "Our first date. Officially our place from then on."
"Right..." You smiled back.
Honestly, the mere fact that he had called this spot 'yours' warmed up your heart, and you felt yourself grinning at his never-before-discovered emotionality. To assure yourself you weren't the only one caring, it was all you needed to hear.
The whole moment was intense, and now, you realized, is when you should have hugged him. Kissed him. Said something back at his sincere endearment.
But instead, spotting plastic cutlery next to your 'gift', you asked, "So what's the taste of the birthday cake?"
And you knew he had caught the subtext of your playful inquiry. And you knew that soon you would work things out again. But, as for now...
"I thought you would never ask."
XOXOXOXO
A/N: Looooooool. Such a drama-comedy, right? And I could easily say It feels like 50% Draco-x-Reader / 50% Draco-x-BirthdayCake... But whatever (2am is working like a drunken bud, folks). Happy beginning of August :)
#draco malfoy x reader#draco x reader#draco x oc#draco x you#draco malfoy#harry potter#draco malfoy x hermione granger#draco malfoy x y/n#Draco Malfoy x OC#draco malfoy x you#harry potter fanfiction#harry potter imagine#draco malfoy imagine#hp fandom#hp#hp fanfic#modern au#draco malfoy one shot#pottermore#draco malfoy fanfiction#mcdonald's#who would have suspected i'm psycho#huh?#lol#lmao
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Meeting The Folks
Pairing: Saul Silva x reader
Requests: Student!reader x Silva, where her friends, her roommates find out and help her get him, like help her dress, sneak around and everything? Anonymous And Student!reader x Silva, about how they tell her parents that they are together? It would be even better if her father or mother was like "wait, Silva? Saul Silva? This Saul Silva that...". Anonymous
Tagging list: @grey-girl @anreeixcobra @kingunder221b @lflores2008 @alexiapayne12 @quuenofblacks @quarterback-5 @bitchwhytho
It’s not easy hiding a relationship from the girls. Especially not when you’re dating the head of the army but you manage to do so for almost 8 months before they discover the truth. It happens one morning when Terra is about to go to the green house. You’d never imagine someone being up at 6am on a Saturday so you don’t do your normal check before leaving Saul’s quarters. Unfortunately, the way to the green house leads straight past there so you practically walk right into Terra.
“Was that-” You hush her checking to see if anyone else has decided to take a morning stroll. She looks like she’s about to burst from excitement but stays quiet until you’re satisfied that she’s the only one here.
“Did you just leave Mr. Silva’s room?” she whisper-yells and you’re hoping that Saul won’t come out. The last thing you need is him panicking over the fact that someone knows.
“It’s a secret. You can’t tell anyone. It would be really bad if the wrong people found out,” you warn her hoping she understands that this isn’t one of those things she can just blabber to everyone.
“How long?” she asks. Going against your gut feeling, you tell her a brief summary of how you and Saul found yourselves falling in love.
“Remember when I got promoted to be his assistant? It meant a lot of late nights and difficult discussions. We didn’t plan for this. It just happened along the way. But if Farah found out, I might get kicked out of Alfea. And Saul would definitely be banned from here.” You can’t believe that you managed to keep this a secret for so long and just days before graduation someone finds out.
“I won’t tell. Promise.” She pretends to lock her lips and throws the key away. This definitely won’t a secret tomorrow. You spend the day worrying about Terra and you don’t relax until she’s back in the suite with the other Winx girls. When she sees you, she gives you a not-so-secretive wink making you facepalm yourself.
“Did you guys want to get some dinner?” you ask looking around at the girls. You’d been their mentor when they first arrived to the school but the friendship stayed even after they’d settled in to Alfea.
“Aren’t you having dinner with Sa-”
“Terra!” you yell and she immediately covers her mouth.
“I’m so sorry, it slipped out.” But the damage is done.
“Who is she talking about?” Stella smirks starting to list names of the boys in your year. The only who stays quiet is Musa. When you lock eyes with her, you realise why.
“Don’t,” you mouth to her hoping she’ll understand and she gives you the slightest nod. She must’ve felt your anxiety at Terra almost saying his name and put two and two together. You have no doubt that she knows Terra was about to say Saul.
“There’s also Sander,” Stella says still listing the names of boys not realising she’s looking for the name of a man. Specifically, a man older than any of the students.
“It’s Saul!” you exclaim bending under pressure. You’ve wanted to tell them for so long and now that two of the girls already know, you may as well you say it. You want to be able to talk about him to someone that isn’t him.
“Have you been sneaking around with Mr. Silva?” Bloom asks making you sigh.
“Please just call him Saul,” you say but they all refuse.��
“We’re not the ones sharing a bed with him. I’ll stick to Mr. Silva,” Aisha laughs and the rest of the girls nod in agreement.
“I can’t believe that you’ve robbed me of helping you with your outfits for dates, creating little meet cutes between the two of you. We could’ve helped come up with ideas for dates,” Stella pouts adding, “I’m not mad. Just disappointed.” Over the next couple of days, Stella makes it her mission to make up for lost time. She plans all of your outfits, arranged cute little moments for you and Saul all while making sure no one interrupts you. It baffles you just how good she is at this. Saul takes the news of the girls finding out surprisingly well.
“Now that we’re so close to graduation, I don’t see how it’ll make much a difference.” You’re happy he’s okay with them knowing because that makes it so much easier for you to suggest telling your parents.
“You want to what?” he asks almost choking in his food.
“I want to tell my parents. You said it yourself, it doesn’t make that much of a difference now.” You’ve always been close with your parents and it’s been killing you to have to hide this from them. He can’t argue against his own logic so the day after graduation you find yourself on the road preparing to introduce your parents to Saul.
“Are you sure it’s a good idea? Maybe we should wait.” You’ve never seen Saul nervous before and you quickly decide it’s the cutest thing you’ve ever seen.
“They will love you. Almost as much as I do,” you smile hoping you’re telling the truth, “but maybe you should wait outside and let me test the waters first.” He agrees clutching your hand in his. Seeing your parents fill you with happiness even with the knowledge of what you have to tell them.
“We are so proud of you!” your mother exclaims congratulating you on finally graduating. They’re both hold very important positions in your realm meaning they couldn’t get time off to travel all the way to Alfea but they demand to get all the details now that you’re here.
“Well, I do actually have something to tell you.” To buy yourself some time, you grab one of the cookies that your mother has put out on the table and take a few bites. They have enough common sense to let you work up the courage on your own rather than push you.
“I’m seeing someone,” you start and are quickly interrupted by your mother’s cheers.
“We have to meet them! Do you have a picture of them? Or maybe they came with you?” She’s so caught up in the fact that you’re dating someone, she doesn’t wait to hear who it is.
“Mom, I’m happy that you’re happy but you may want to wait until I tell you who it is.” You take a deep breath to calm yourself.
“I’m dating Saul Silva.”
“Saul Silva?” Your mother sits down looking a little pale.
“Wait, Saul Silva? As in Head of the Army Saul Silva? The man who’s killed 13 Burned Ones?” It’s the first time your father chimes in and you can see the confusion on his face. Of course, they both know who Saul is but they definitely didn’t expect you to be dating him.
“The Saul Silva who’s not only Headmaster for the specialists but also the fencing instructor on Alfea?”
“That’s the one,” you say trying to figure out if now is the time to bring him in. He’s probably trying to eavesdrop by the door.
“I can bring him in if you’d like,” you offer to which your mother springs up from her chair and grabbing the fancy platters.
“Why didn’t you tell us you were dating such fine company. The table is all wrong.” That’s your mother in a nutshell. She runs around using her magic to redecorate and move around furniture. Your father remains seated apparently in shock so you figure now is as good a time as any.
“Saul,” you call after opening the door. Immediately, he’s by your side his eyes asking if everyone is okay.
“I think you may be their favourite,” you laugh taking his hand to lead him inside.
“What an honour to have you,” your mother says shaking his hand. Your dad gets up to do the same but he doesn’t let go of Saul’s hand. There’s a little bit of a challenge in your father’s eyes and Saul accepts it. The testosterone is heavy in the air as they try to crack each other’s hands.
“That’s enough,” your mother says signalling for all of you to sit down by the table. They spend the next three hours questioning Saul and his intentions for you. At no point do they mention his age - the one thing you were worried they’d be upset about. It seems that all they really want is for you to be happy.
“Don’t be a stranger now,” your mother says standing in the doorway as you’re about to head home. You wave goodbye one last time before getting in the car.
“That went well,” Saul says acting as if he wasn’t worried to begin with. You roll your eyes but smile nonetheless.
“Just take me home,” you say with closed eyes. Your hand comes to rest on his thigh, a habit you’ve created after driving with him many times.
“Yes, ma’am.”
#saul silva x reader#saul silva gif#saul silva imagine#saul silva blurb#saul silva#silva#fate the winx saga#fate the winx club#fate winx club#winx saga#winx club#fate winx#fate
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Zero to Six ~ The Death of Six - Edited version.
Greetings and salutations! So I know this isn’t what everyone wanted but people are still reading Zero to Six and I’m honestly so grateful that a year on, people are still loving this series. But I never felt like I wrote it properly, the chapters where always too short and I felt like they were never detailed enough so I wanted to bring to you an edited version (that probably still won’t be perfect.) one that I’m more satisfied with. I will be keeping the original version up just in case people prefer that one, maybe one day I’ll take it down? who knows but yeah so enjoy! <3 P.s I’ve missed you all so much and I’ve really missed this series. Hopefully sometime soon the Prequel will be out which I have started and named ‘Before there was Six, there was Zero.’
Characters: Four X Zero (OC) Summary: Zero was the first person to be ‘saved’ by One, she was his first honorary Ghost. Her knowledge in tech meant she got the role of ‘Hacker’ she recruited new team members, looked for missions and locations and made sure every security measure was looked at. You know normal hacker spy stuff. But her tough up bringing meant that if needs be she could fight, she was maybe even better than some people on the team knew. But due to One’s protectiveness over her she had to stay hidden, she was more of an actual ghost than the rest of the team was. This didn’t mean she couldn’t have her fun though, over the months of being with the full team she had formed quite a passionate love/ hate relationship with the handsome Four. Who knows what sparks would fly if they were ever to meet. Warnings: Slight swearing, some suggestive flirting in later chapters.
Tagg list: (I know this is a edit of my original story but if anyone wants to be tagged let me know.) @raylan-c
Zero to Six ~ Part 2. Edited Version. Masterlist.
“You’re stalling.”
“I’m not stalling.” Zero could practically hear the smirk in Fours voice over the coms. “I’m simply just working myself up to it.”
She laughed. “You always say that, and you’re always stalling.” She was playing on his last nerve, she knew it but this would be good for Four and entertainment for her. He always worked better when he was frustrated and no one stressed him out quite like Zero.
Four had been doing parkour for most of his life, or that’s what he told them. Yet he was still fearful every single time, still I guess that’s what made him great at it the fear of always falling gave him the adrenaline he needed to make the jumps.
Another breathless laugh fluttered through Zeros left ear. “Don’t test me darling.” Now it was his turn to make Zero sweat, this always happened. Zero would insult and tease and Four would flirt right back, although most of the team were used to it by now they still broke them up from time to time.
“Whatever monkey boy, just be ready for when Six gets his ass in gear!” She clicked her tongue. “I can hear you mocking me asshole, remember I hold the key here I can make your life a living hell with just one click of a button.”
“You already make my life hell darling, But I live for it everyday.”
“Swear to god Four, you’re a pain in my ass.” She mumbled as she typed away at the computer trying to figure out their next move so she could be ready with any instruction they needed.
“I’m sure your ass is pretty fine, I can’t wait to see it someday.” She could practically feel the smirk.
“Yeah? And I can't wait to punch the smirk off that pretty face one day, only you could be in a life or death situation and be thinking about my virtual ass.”
“Wait, did you just admit to fancying me Zero? Guys she called me handsome, I think I’m getting somewhere.”
“Go for Four!” Saved by the bell it seems, One’s voice rang through coms. Zero silently thanked god for she did fancy Four, who wouldn’t fancy that absolute Greek god of a man? With that honey voice and the moves he had! moves he could use on her, she shook her head hoping the images of him forming in her head would magically fall out of her brain never to return, but she wouldn’t be so lucky.
“Shut the hell up, stop thinking about ways to seduce Zero and get your ass down here we need you!” And just like that, it was go time. “NOW!”
Zero had been working with this team for a while now, but she was more on the surveillance side of the missions, which meant that she had never officially met the team face to face. The only person she had actually met was One, who had recruited her. He would visit from time to time, she liked to think they had a special bond. She was in fact the first person in need that One had found and ever since then he had become a sort of father figure to her.
Two was next who was sort of cold at times, Zero put this down to her CIA training but she had never been anything but caring towards Zero. Then she found Three, a hitman who she was reluctant to look into at first but she knew now it was the best thing for her and the team. Despite his past he was one of the most sweet and caring men she’d ever met, and he never failed to make her smile on a bad day. Ever since recruiting Four, she felt the atmosphere in the group shift slightly, there was nothing bad about him but they both couldn’t ignore the growing attraction between them, and this was just over cyber space. She then found her best friend in Five, she was different from the rest. Not as violent and rash but still amazing at what she did and protecting herself and others, Zero knew if she ever needed someone the first person she’d go to was Five.
Six was her latest recruit, one that she knew was extremely talented in not only driving but in all things mechanical too, they had chatting a few times about servers and bots and he’d promised her a round in their shared favourite video game once this mission was complete.
She’d be lying to herself and everyone else if she said she didn’t want to meet them all in person, they were the closest thing she had, had to family. However she knew that if she was to meet them nothing could ever come of her and Four. One would definitely not allow it, and most likely lock her straight back up.
Still they were sort of this dysfunctional family, and she was definitely the odd one out. She couldn’t remember the last time she had, had a normal conversation with someone who wasn’t ‘dead’ the only time she was allowed to leave the flat was when One said it was moving day. He didn’t like her staying in one flat too long, she must have moved at least four times this year already. While she was alone in her flat eating ready meals they were all back at base eating together, she sometimes pretended she was there eating with them. Three telling her some stupid story that no one else is listening to because they have heard it at least a thousand times, but she would just be so happy to hear his beautiful accent in person that she would listen to anything he was telling her. How she wished she could hug three in real life. The closest she had gotten to eating with them was over coms, sometimes they would leave the line open for debriefing but it still made her feel like an outcast.
“I’m coming down!” Everything was going wrong, Six had gone the wrong way. Which Zero wasn’t surprised to see as everyone in the car was shouting at each other, she sat there in her gaming chair drinking Dr Pepper and enjoying her fried chicken meal while everyone was losing their minds in the field. Maybe getting to stay in the comfort of her flat wasn’t so bad after all?
“Good boy.” She praised Four. “Finally putting those parkour skills to use, other than robbing some innocent person.”
Even before he started to speak she could tell he’d started to run because his speech came out in huffs. “Shut up, at least I can do parkour which makes me cooler than a girl who sits at her computer all day.”
She had to laugh. “What are you? Five years old? Try again when you can think up better come backs, I can’t take you seriously right now.”
Wherever One moved Zero was never too far away from where the team worked, the first time the rest of the team worked this out was when Zero first used the drone to help navigate them someplace safe. That was also the first time she finally got to see Four in action, the image of him running along the rooftops like a monkey in the jungle both amused her and impressed her. Hence the nickname she had given him. But there were also times when he would have close calls, where he had nearly fallen to his death that’s when the breath would get knocked out of her and she would only calm when she knew he was safe on the ground again.
“Right over you guys.” He said in a strained voice while leaping onto another roof.
“So guys, just look out for the flying monkey above you. That will be Four.” Most of the teasing with Four was just to pass the time while they were out in the field having fun and mainly it was just way too fun to hear him get so frustrated.
“Zero, that’s not helping us.” One said in a sing-song voice.
“Maybe it’s not helping you, but it is definitely helping me pass the time.” All she could hear was a disappointed grunt from One which just made her chuckle,it was also very fun to piss One off.
“Six! SIX! Wrong way god damn it!”
She cringed at how loud Four had screamed down the coms. “Come back! I’ve got an idea.”
“Ladies and gentleman, for the first time in his life Four has an idea!” She said mindlessly typing away trying to find the best route for them to escape by.
“You know what Zero, when we finally meet I’m going to run that fine ass of yours into the ground.” He all but growled.
“You can try monkey boy, but you’ll have to catch me first.” She smirked to herself, she secretly hoped that, that was more of a promise than a mere threat. “Oh, challenge accepted sweetheart. I’d love to have a game of cat and mouse with you.”
“You two do remember that we are on a mission right now, right?” Six moaned. “What with you two flirting, and these absolute idiots fighting beside me in the car. I’m finding it very hard to concentrate on driving!” With every word Six’s voice got more agitated and louder.
“We are not flirting!” Both Four and Zero exclaimed together.
“Aww they even said it at the same time!” Zero just rolled her eyes at One’s teasing. “No one cares, now both of you shut up so we can all get out of here.”
“That’s it Six, keep coming towards me!” The drone was filming just above the action, once she’d wiped her hands and they were free from the grease on her chicken. She finally realised what Four was about to do.
Suddenly the car that was tailing Six was being impaled by five metal tubes. “God, okay I’m definitely done eating now. That was so gross.”
Then the screaming started to fill the coms. “Guy’s, what the hell are you doing?” All Zero could make out was something about an eyeball.
“This is so stressful! Can everyone stop arguing and speaking over each other?!” Zero was getting agitated now.
“YOU THINK YOU’RE STRESSED?! I’M TRYING TO DRIVE WHILST ALSO TRYING NOT TO KILL ANYONE, DID I MENTION I ALSO HAVE AN EYEBALL ON MY LEG?!” Six all but screamed down the coms, loud enough that Zero had to remove her earpiece until she was sure he was done with his rant.
“Six sweetie,” she said as calmly as she could, trying not to laugh. “Are you okay?”
“DO I SOUND LIKE I’M OKAY ZERO?!” She knew he would say that, she finally let out the chuckle she was trying to hold as to not irritate him further.
“Sorry I was just asking. I swear I‘m not using your painful situation to make myself feel better.” She held her hands up in defence even though he couldn’t see her.
He just let out a huff. “I’m going to ignore you now Zero, you’re pissing me off more than these guys are.”
After the commotion things went quiet for a while, there was now a helicopter tailing them so all effort and concentration went on losing it. While there was little chatter over the coms the main sound that dominated the air was the gunfire, Zero silently prayed to herself while she watched the drone that everyone would make it out of their first real mission alive. One finally found a route for them, conveniently inside of a building that would shelter them enough to lose the aerial surveillance they were under.
“The drone will meet you on the other side, good luck and please try not to make too much of a mess in there Six. There are some priceless statues in there we would all like preserving.” Just as Zero finished her sentence she heard a loud crash.
“You were saying?” Six chuckled nervously.
“You didn’t.” Zero stared shocked at her screen, mouth wide open.
One was the one to respond to her though. “Unfortunately he did, don’t worry we’re all just as disappointed in him.”
“Okay we finally lost the chopper, Zero do you have a visual?” One asked surprisingly calmly.
“You mean the bright green car, kind of hard to miss. Good choice Six you really blend in.” Zero laughed. “I see you, there are two black vans heading your way. Shake them off then head to the arranged rendezvous spot where Three will be waiting for you.”
Six’s voice was strained when he spoke. “Listen, fast and convenient was what I was told to get. So that’s what I got.”
Zero would have responded but she was more distracted by the sight of Four on a skateboard holding a launcher. He jumped off the board and leaped up onto the stone wall just as one of the black vans passed, he aimed and shot, never missing the mark. She was impressed for a moment but then saw the smug smile on his face, he looked directly into the drone and winked at Zero. She just scoffed, what an absolute show off.
“Seems like we have a superhero on our team.” Six laughed impressed.
Zero scoffed again, but this time loud enough so everyone could hear it over the coms. “I wouldn’t exactly call him a superhero.”
“Then what would you call me darling? A Greek god?” This is the thing about Four, he’d never met Zero in person but he knew exactly how to push her buttons. She’d be lying if she said she didn’t enjoy the banter from time to time.
“Hurm more like a vein asshole that thinks far too highly of himself.” She snapped back.
But he just laughed, the complete opposite of what she was expecting. “I mean everyone else loves me, might as well love myself too.” She rolled her eyes, She really couldn’t blame him though he was a very handsome man but no way in hell was she ever going to tell him that. “One day you’ll fall for the charm that everyone else falls for. I know you’re already obsessed with me.”
“In your dreams Four.”
“It already happens in my dreams, every night darling. I’d be happy to elaborate later on in a private chat.” Zero audibly gagged.
“Guy’s can we please cut out the flirting until after the mission? We’re nearly there and I don’t think any of us want to hear whatever this is.” One sounded tired and Zero just laughed at how much their fighting annoyed the other members.
“Yes boss!” She added in a salute even though One couldn’t see her, he could feel she was mocking him.
Just then the drone cut out. “Shit! Someone shot down the drone. You’re on your own from here guys.”
There was a commotion through the coms, one that didn’t sound at all good. Car tyres screeched, bullets rain down on the metal of the car Zero held her breath as she waited for anything. Even just a breath so she knew at least someone was still alive, her heart stopped when the line had been silent for too long she had to know what happened.
“Guys, come on talk to me. What’s going on? Why are you all being so silent? What happened?” There was another breath of silence and her mind went straight to Four, she shook her head. No! She wasn’t going to let herself think about that, she scolded herself for getting too attached to the little shit.
The was a crackle over the line, Five cleared her throat. “Six is dead, we’re in the van, the space is clear.”
Zero sucked in a breath, she felt like her lungs were burning. “What?”
“Zero listen to me, you need to turn off coms now.” One must have turned from the group, he was using his quiet, serious voice. “I’ll handle this okay, I’ll check back in with you later.”
Just like that he was gone, she clicked the switch to turn off almost absentmindedly. She sat back in her chair, only snapping back to reality when she felt something wet fall on her hand. She softly touched her face to find her cheeks were wet, when had she started to cry? Six wasn’t someone she knew in person, he had been the last member of the team but still a very important piece of their puzzle. She thought about the game he had promised to play with her after the mission, this would never come to pass now. Now he was really dead, and it was all her fault.
For the first time Zero started to think about the whole team and if One’s master plan of being ghosts to take down the world’s evil was such a good idea after all, why had it taken a real death in the team for her to even think about this. What if it had been Four, she didn’t think she could live with herself if anything ever happened to Four, maybe it was a good thing they had never met. Seeing him in person, hearing his deep honey voice, feeling his warmth would definitely make her fall deeper then she already was. He was just a voice over the coms but behind that was a real person, one that probably wouldn’t even share the same feelings towards her. So she thought ‘Yes, It’s a good thing I’m behind this computer screen and not with them in person.’ She had to try to distance herself from now on.
......
Just wanted to say one last Thank You! for the continued support for this story <3
#ben hardy#ben hardy fanfic#ben hardy fanfiction#ben hardy four#6 underground#6 underground fanfiction#6 underground four#6 underground fanfic#6 underground billy#four#four fanfiction#four fanfic#four x reader#four x oc#four x zero#billy x reader#billy x oc#billy x scout#6 underground x reader
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OC Interview: Vatna
Thanks for the tag @cleverblackcat, @mageofholyandraste, @darethshirl! It sounds fun!
Introduction
This event was organized a few weeks prior to the Winter Palace ball. Ambassador Josephine Montilyet had invited a few Orlesian journalists to Skyhold to interview the newly appointed Inquisitor.
Can you introduce yourself?
Vatna Einarsdotten Selkesdotten of Two Falcon Hold. (a moment of silence) In the Frostback Mountains. (another moment of silence as the interviewers wait for her to say something else) Inquisitor of the Second Inquisition. (it seems that she won’t say anything more, so one of the journalists asks the next question)
What are your gender identity, orientation, and relationship status?
Is that what you ask every Lowlander? (grumbles) Alright. I see myself a woman. Who I invite or don’t invite to my bed is my very own matter. I am unmarried and have never been before. If you’re curious, yes, the Avvar may marry multiple times in their life if they wish so. Does this answer satisfy you?
Where and when were you born?
I was born in Two Falcon Hold, eighteen... no, nineteen winters ago. (she corrects herself as she remembers that winter came and went when she was away from home, making her one winter older than when she left)
What is your weapon of choice and fighting style?
I am a mage. Unlike most spellweavers in your Circles, we in the mountains train with all sort of weapons, just like any other warrior. I prefer fighting in close quarters. When I came of age, I chose an axe as my preferred weapon. It was commissioned from the dwarves of Orzammar. The blade is engraved with runes and the handle has lyrium core that I can easily channel my magic through. It has been... misplaced for the first few months that I spent with the Inquisition, but it was recovered. Fortunately, the gods blessed me with another weapon in the meantime - the fire-staff that belonged to the Avvar-Mother. I’ve been told this topic is a source of confusion, but I’m not sure how to explain it better. Yes, I do use both an axe and a staff now. I had a battleaxe when I arrived into the Lowlands. Then I lost it. Then I claimed the staff of Tyrdda Bright-Axe. Tyrdda was called Bright-Axe because she had a staff with a fire-focusing crystal. But the word ‘axe’ used to mean every hafted weapon. Then I got back my axe, my regular axe... Let’s go to the next question.
Are you happy?
I’ll be happy when the Lady’s Veil is fully repaired and Corypheus lies dead. Until then, I have work to do. Would you be happy if there were world-dooming critters in your house? Because there are. There are cowards in Orlais scheming together with Corypheus, maybe even people you know. (a lady in a pale blue mask exchanges looks with the others and suggests a lighter topic)
Family and friends
What should I say? Just talk about my family and friends? Well, my father is called Einar, my mother is called Selke. In my hold, we take bynames after both our parents, so I actually already revealed their names. My father was born is Two Falcon Hold, my mother moved from another hold further south. They’ve been married for twenty three years now. They were rather mad to promise such a long marriage without extensions. Eighty-eight knots, can you imagine? I mean, they could always as the Thane to cut the rope short if they grew tired of each other... But it works well for them. I hope they’ll live together until it the last knot. (the interviewers prompt her to explain what she meant by knots and ropes) Oh, I run away with that. The number of knots is the number of years the marriage is supposed to last. Before the wedding, the bride ties a number of knots into a rope, and the groom’s task is to untie them. On the wedding day, the bride starts to sing hymns to the Lady of the Skies. The groom begins to untie the knots then. However many he’ll manage to unravel before the hymns ends, that many years they shall be married together. After the promise ends, they can get married again if they wish. But my parents vowed to get married for eighty-eight years right away. Eight is a blessed amount. Eighty-eight, doubly so. I’ve been told the ritual took all day to complete. By the end of it, my mother’s throat was sore and my father’s knuckles were raw. But they got married how they wanted, and the bond has been steadfast for many years now.
I have a younger sister, Hirka. She’s only four winters younger than me but she can be a real brat sometimes. We used to be inseparable as children. Then we both grew a bit. I got my magic and had to spent a lot of time mastering my abilities. She had other things to do too. But she’s my sister no matter what.
I have some (she pauses to rememeber the right word in Common language) aunts and uncles, but most of them and their families live in other holds, so I haven’t seen them a lot. Only a few times, never in some cases. The word still travels through the Mountains, so we do hear news from them every now and then.
In the end, the whole hold is your kin.
Have you ever run away from home?
Once or twice, I skulked outside of the hold and refused to go back until well after nightfall. But I never really run away, I wouldn’t abandon my family like that.
Would you consider marriage or having children?
I don’t know.
Do you secretly hate any of your friends?
No, I do not. Those who I call my friends, I think as such. I make my dislikes known. Too easily, I’ve been told.
Which friend knows everything about you?
There is someone who knows my soul, but I’m not going to talk about it.
Asked by fans
Are you literate? Have you been to school?
Yes, I can read and write. Not everyone in the Mountains does, but more than you imagine, I think. Augurs, skalds, merchants, those who aspire to be thanes... Many are able to tell the numbers, in order to trade with dwarves, but haven’t practiced beyond that.
The augurs learn how to read so that they may study old magics. I was an apprentice to the Sky Watcher of my hold - uh, a Sky Watcher is like a... priest to the Lady of the Skies. I was supposed to become his successor. So I studied something almost every day since I was eight. One day, I would memorize the shapes of protection sigils, and then try to draw them myself. Another day, I would study the uses of all mushrooms found in caves. But we don’t have any schools like there are in the lowlands. You learn from your mentors and from the gods, and most importantly, from your own mistakes.
The eeriest prediction you made that later came true?
Eeriest? I’m not sure. I dreams of many things. Some come true, but not in the way I imagined them to.
What is something you were embarrassingly late to realise?
I had no idea those lap dogs your Orlesian ladies carry around are really dogs. I’d never guess they share blood with wolves. I thought they’re some sort of magic toy.
Do you have mental or physical problems?
Do you honestly expect me to reveal my weaknesses to you?
What is your current main goal?
As I said before, restore the Veil and kill Corypheus.
Drink or food?
Am I supposed to choose between the two? Food, I guess. I could live on soups and stews, maybe. Does goat milk count as drink or food?
Cats or dogs?
Birds.
Optimist or pessimist?
I learned these words only recently. I must say, I do not fully understand why your sages would divide people like that. Is there someone who truly sees everything in bright colours? And someone who sees everything in black? Isn’t everyone a little bit of this and a little bit of that? Perhaps I’m more on the pessimist side.
Sassy or sarcastic?
Eh, sarcastic.
HAVE YOU EVER:
Have you ever been caught sneaking out?
Yes, I once got so bored with my healing lessons that I decided to sneak out while Jokka wasn’t looking. She of course noticed me right away. I never tried to sneak out again.
Broken a bone?
I broke my left wrist while climbing. My mentor healed it quickly but he left a scar to serve as a reminder to not be so reckless.
Received flowers?
I... (she bits her tongue) Josephine tells me I had received several bouquets of flowers this last week. She had placed them in the guest hall where everyone can enjoy them.
Ghosted someone?
Ghosted? (a man in a green mask explains mirthfully) No, never. I wouldn’t leave someone hanging like that. I’d tell him straight in the face. (she replies sharply)
Pretended to laugh at a joke you didn't get?
I have yet to learn how to pretend so well as to laugh at something I don’t understand or find funny.
~
Tagging (no pressure, of course, this is just for fun): @dreadfutures, @tejaswrites, @serenpedac, @molliehaswords, @crackinglamb, @a11sha11fade, @rakshadow, @samuraisaucefrites, @noire-pandora, @1000generations
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How about Deuce, Azul, Idia and the Leech twins' if it's not too much, (smoll)male s/o saying "I love you." for the first time ? Thanks !
Sure, annonie! Since I also have a smol boi I can imagine this scenario in my head and It's! SO! CUTE! o(^▽^)o
Triggers: None
Deuce, Azul, Idia, Jade and Floyd small male s/o saying "I love you" for the first time
Neither of you two have said the phrase "I love you" no matter how much you two really want to say it because you two are too nervous to initiate it. He never had a romantic relationship before and is also as nervous as you so it's not really a surprise if you said it first.
He was always taking good care of you and always showing you physical affection. He enjoys hugging and cuddling your small figure, always nervously complimenting how pretty you are petting your head and everything. Yes, he has the balls to do all this but apparently not brave enough to say "I love you". Yes, very tragic.
So when you first said those magic three words, he was startled. Not sure what he really felt at the time but all we know is that he's shocked. When those words came out of your mouth, he made a dramatic gasp and stood like a statue, staring at you with his eyes all bugged out.
Despite him being probably ticklish, poking him even at his most sensitive areas won't even make him flinch, this is the most life changing moment for him. (almost correct, he's just being dramatic at the moment) He's aware that you love him but you saying it is still a shocking thing, this feels just like the time you confessed that you also have feelings for him. It takes a few minutes to go back to reality and when he does, his face is as red as Riddle's hair and fuming face combined.
He would feel ashamed about not being able to say it first. He would spit out thousands of apologies for not saying it first or not being not good enough because he didn't say it first. So he decided to spill all his feelings and what little things he loves about you in such a quick pace to the point he sounds incoherent. He'll get weird stares from other students and will get teased by both Ace and Grim later if they coincidentally walked pass you two.
Azul has said his love for you multiple times but it's not often as the others as he either doesn't have that much time to spend with you because of work or because he despises saying those words in public. Of course, he still wants to say his love for you but he has a reputation to hold and being overly affectionate is not something a gentleman nor a businessman would do! No matter how much he would love to hug your smaller figure from behind, it's just unprofessional.
He really doesn't give one if you haven't said you love him back but if this lasts until months, then he's getting anxious and antsy. He knows you love him back but he would appreciate it a bit more if you said it as well. He really craves to hear those three words from his s/o when dating. Plus, he has said it so much to you, why haven't you said it to him? He has these thoughts, thinking he was ready to hear it any moment but when he did hear it from you, he was caught off guard.
When you do say it, he stopped whatever he was doing. Yes, it was very unprofessional for a businessman to get so surprised over something so simple as that but give him a break. He might not be human but he still has the feelings of one. Plus, this is the first time he heard it from you. He managed to cover up his slightly shocked expression by clearing his throat and saying he loves you back, acting like nothing happened and tried brushing it off.
When he's in his workroom with both of the Leech twins there, he is having a hard time. Both having a hard time to focus and a hard time to keep his cool from his cheeks reddening in front of the devilish pair. He really cannot get that thought about you declaring your love for him, looking really cute and extra points for your shorter height making it seem more innocent and cuter. He kept adjusting his glasses and pinching the bridge of his nose. The two do realise that something's going on inside the mind of the octopus boy and decided to pester him about it later.
In his bedroom, a place where nobody is sure to see him doing whatever in there because he had forced the good habit of knocking and asking permission before entering to his dorm members, he's more of a mess since there's nothing restricting him from showing his true emotions. He's shifting all over the bed to the point of no return, all blushed up and still trying to cover it despite that nobody's there. It's always fresh in his mind and just prays for it to go away as fast as possible. It will, spoiler alert but it'll take a few couple of weeks or even months for the memory to fade away for now.
He has said his "I love you" to you before but it's not really that surprising or anything to be that shocked as he only declared it in text form. There's no way he's going to confess it verbally on irl because that's such a "normie thing to do"! And also because he's just anxious to say it in general. Yeah, it's just three words but they say so much and it's easier said than..actually saying it, especially in front of the person you want to say it to. Except he can't even say it in voice chat either.
It's like saying it in front of a cute anime girl character that every fan probably adores. You even have the cute height of an adorable move shoujo manga deuteragonist, the protagonist's love interest! cute, short and just the character's fan favourite, you know? It will either always take some time or it takes the end of the manga for the protagonist to confess. It's like the same thing except they're already together!
It was a normal day of voice chatting after a nice match of an online fighting game. He kept praising your amazing skills and tricks for playing for the first time and hoping that you two can play again. Then from that, he kept wanting to read these mangas he thought was interesting with you. He was very excited and filled with energy, how can't you not think that's straight up adorable and not express how you love that part of him?
So when you did, he went immediately silent. There's not even a noise of a ceiling fan. Just dead, utter silence. You kept calling out for his name no matter how many times he hasn't answered. Out of nowhere, he cut the call, leaving you alone. In just a few minutes later, he went offline. You were worried, what the hell just happened? You knew that kneading freakout about your sudden words but you for some reason didn't expect it to affect him that much. You might have to contemplate whether you should visit him to check if he's ok or not.
He's not ok, at all but not like in a bad way. He's happy but he's panicking. First, he's such a wimp for not saying the words first to the point you have to declare it first. Even if saying 'I love you' is such a normie thing, he's aware it's something important to say if you're in a goddamn relationship. Second, what was he supposed to say after that? 'I love you too'!? How? As much as he wants to spit it out, he couldn't. Though, one day. Maybe he could learn to say it back? Through the teachings of a shoujo mangas of course!
Jade is wonderful at saying his love for you verbally. His words can go from simple "I love yous" to a list of 150 reasons why he loves you in alphabetical order. Though he won't say it as much in public, his love language from both physical and verbal are endless! If you're a cheesy, affectionate man then he would be the perfect man for you! (though, he's always perfect for everyone in general)
There's no way for him to describe his love for you, especially his love for your small frame. It's obvious that he's a giant when compared next to you and he has pride for that. You unintentionally give him power and dominance just by staring at you. Just by holding you, he's amorous. He's always holding you close on his bed, whispering sweet nothings and the three words that never rolled out of your tongue until now.
It was another casual cuddling session after the long day of work of Jade. He was doing the normal thing, complementing your tiny body and saying his 'I love yous' and that. You were hesitant but after all this time of him praising you and after a long day of work, shouldn't he receive his reward and the thing that he should hear after months of being together? When you say the magic words, his eyes widen for a few seconds only for his face turns into his iconic toothy grin. He kept teasing you to repeat them as he pretended that he couldn't hear you.
He expects you to say these words more often now that you finally said it. For the entire time, he secretly waits for you to say those words because as much of a gentleman he is, he anticipated that you're supposed to say those words back not just because you're boyfriends but because he deserves it after all those comments he tossed to you. (don't worry, he means his words, it's just that my guy wants affection too) and when he finally gets it, he's very and finally satisfied, like he finished his final mission or something.
He might not show it since he's a master of hiding his emotions but he's genuinely joyful about it. He finally got one of his dreams about or with you finished and he was way more satisfied at the result. You're small innocent self finally saying I love you back is kinda like the dream for him for some reason.. Please say your love for him more without him begging because the last thing he wants to say to you is saying "say you love me"
Knowing Floyd, he doesn't care about what anyone has to say about his affection towards you. No matter where you are, if he's in a good mood then he has no resistance to just fling and run himself into your comfy arms. There's a reason as to why he chose you as your boyfriend after all.
He has a thing for people smaller than him and it's shown by bullying Riddle till he's about to blow up like a volcano (or already blown up, depends on how he feels or what he said) and you being his boyfriend won't make you immune to his teasing. If anything, he will bully you about your height even more but he knows where to cross the line unlike with other students. He's very touchy so expect him to touch your small torso every time he has the chance.
He doesn't even realise that you haven't said your love for him if your love language leans more to physical. He wouldn't mind if you don't say it if you're also returning his hugs and super invested in cuddling sessions. Kiss him, hug him or do anything that's physical and he would be just as happy but if you don't do any of that, then he might say something about it or puff his cheeks out, pouting.
You were on his lap, cuddling like always, ignoring the judgemental stares you two are getting. Brave enough for them to try staring down at your giant monster of a boyfriend. He pours everything interesting that has happened to him or he has witnessed, aka the normal things he does everyday (surprising of how consistent he was) and it was adorable especially with his cooing voice when he mentions something he really thinks is cool. You accidentally said that is what you love about him and he stopped and looked at you for a second.
"Oh, Is that so?" oh, get prepared to be teased for that by the way. He's more in love with more than ever when you said that, especially the way you said it confidently, knowing that well it's unintentional. He has no shame to ask you to say it more or he'll squeeze you. Unsure if that's just a joking statement or not. I mean, he's technically squeezing the life out of you, screaming "I love you" at a ridiculously fast pace so he's probably not. Unfortunately or fortunately for you, he will ask you where's his daily "I love you" if you haven't said it yet before you separate your ways to your dorm for the next day to rise.
Can you tell I panicked when writing Floyd's part? Don't know why I panicked in the first place though, lol~
~𝕸𝖎𝖗𝖎
#twisted wonderland#twst wonderland#twst writing#twst fluff#twst deuce#deuce spade#deuce x reader#twst azul#azul ashengrotto#azul x reader#twst idia#idia shroud#idia x reader#twst jade#jade leech#jade x reader#twst floyd#floyd leech#floyd x reader#twisted wonderland x mc#twisted wonderland x reader#twisted wonderland x you#x male reader#male reader
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Here With You (Barry Allen x Reader)
Character: Barry Allen
Fandom: Justice League (Snyder) / DC
Tags: Hurt / comfort, cuddling, fluff
Warnings: Tooth rotting fluff
Word Count: 2,2k words
Summary: Y/N is having a bad day, but still doesn’t want to reach out. When Barry still appears at Y/N’s place, worried, they will realize it’s not so bad to need cheering up.
A/N: Apparently I’m not done fangirling about this cutie, so here’s another Barry Allen ficlet for you! Hope you like it! Remember to please reblog it and leave feedback if you like it, it would mean the world to me! 🙏💕
Barry Allen x Gender Neutral Reader
You were so tired and so on edge that everything bothered you. Even the background noise of the city outside your window seemed to hurt your sensitive ears and fuzzy mind.
Sneaking a quick glance to your phone, you considered making a call. You knew Barry would be there with you in a second, and that he would magically solve everything. Still, something kept you from calling him. You could deal with that day on your own.
If only you had the energies, you would get up and do something. There you were, feebly lying down on your bed and staring at the ceiling. No music, no TV, no phone, no nothing. All you wanted to do was lie there and dwell on your misery.
It had been a bad day. First your alarm didn’t work and you were late, then you ran out of hot water and couldn’t shower. And not only was your work day awful, but you also had tiny little things that only worsened your mood. You spilled your coffee, you had to stay late, you dropped your suitcase with all your paperwork that scattered on the ground, and on top of all people kept bumping into you as you walked home. It was a multitude of small things that became all too big.
A demanding knock on your door startled you in your loud silence. What now? Cautious as to who it could be, you apathetically sat up and waited. They knocked again.
“Y/N?” Came Barry’s familiar voice. “Are you in there?”
A part of you wanted to ignore him, to pretend like you weren’t home so he would leave. You didn’t have the strength to face even him, everything overwhelmed you. But he sounded worried, and he was your best friend after all.
Tired and resigned, you stood up and dragged your feet as you walked to the front door. Barry kept on restlessly knocking.
“C’mon, Y/N, open the-” When you swung the door open, he showed you a smile. “There you are!”
“Hi, Barry…” You mumbled, letting the door open and idly moving to the couch. You plopped down there, assuming he would follow in tow.
“Are you okay? You haven’t answered my calls”
“My phone’s on silent”
“O-kay…” Barry slowly sat by you, intently staring. “What’s wrong?”
You sighed, hating that you were so transparent. Or that he knew you so damn well. Or both.
“I had a really bad day” You pouted, feeling like crying just at the thought of it. Why was it bothering you that much? Nothing catastrophic had happened.
“Wanna talk about it?” He kindly offered, but you shook your head.
“No…” You had to tightly press your lips together when a sudden urge to cry overwhelmed you. A sob was already reaching your throat.
“Oh, gosh, please don’t cry” Barry stared at you with wide eyes, fidgeting on his seat. “I-I mean, cry if you need to, but uh… it’s okay”
His hand fell on your shoulder, then gently lowering to your arm so he could comfortingly rub it up and down. You nodded your head, trying to tell yourself that he was right. It was okay, nothing you couldn’t handle.
“It’s okay, Y/N” He whispered. “You want a hug?”
A single rogue tear rolled down your cheek, but you grit your teeth. You refused to cry, especially not in front of Barry. His heartbroken look as he stared at you was enough to make you want to hold it in. Frustrated, you only wiped your face with your hand.
“I’m…” You sighed, trying to control yourself. “I’m okay”
Not believing you, he kept staring. In an attempt to reassure him, you forced out a smile. Barry still didn’t seem convinced, but he knew you better than to try to insist.
“Great!” Barry said in the end, kindly patting your arm. “But you know what we gotta do now, right?”
“What?”
“Emergency movie night!”
“Barry…” You began to say, but he was already on his way.
Now that he knew you were upset, nothing would stop him from doing everything in his power to cheer you up. Barry wouldn’t rest until he saw you smile.
“Here you go” Your best friend sped through again, suddenly appearing next to you and dropping a bunch of DVDs on the table before disappearing again.
“Stop that!” You jumped to your feet and scolded him, barely managing to follow him with your gaze. “Don’t tire yourself, it’s not worth it!”
“Of course it’s worth it!” Barry appeared next to you again, bearing a playfully serious expression as he handed you something. “It’s my mission as your best friend to cheer you up”
You rolled your eyes a little, fondly watching him as he went off again. Looking down to your arms, you saw that what he had given you were many bags of snacks. You absently put them on the table.
“Besides” Barry nudged you, standing next to you so suddenly that you wobbled a little. He was ready to hold you up. “I can always raid your fridge after”
You were suddenly fighting a smile. He had only been there for maybe a few minutes and he was already making things better. How could you not adore him?
“Okay” He returned, followed by the sweet smell of popcorn. “Now we have everything”
In such a flamboyant way that you almost laughed, Barry tugged at your hand until you were sitting on the couch again. Then he put a blanket over your legs and placed the bowl of popcorn between the two of you as he joined you in the seat.
“But don’t hog the blanket” He made a funny face as he also covered his own legs with it so you were sharing it.
You heaved a sigh, resigned to letting him look after you. It wasn’t so bad after all, even if you weren’t as used to his blatant cares as he would like to.
He pulled the first smile out of you when he picked up the remote and turned the movie on. Just with the music and the starting credits, you recognized it was your favorite movie. He knew you well.
“Oh, and the best part” Barry seriously peered at you, opening his arms. “Cuddles!”
You chuckled in spite of yourself, and his sudden grin in return was so bright that it could have light up the room by itself. Barry wiggled his arms still, suggestively raising his eyebrows too.
“Fine” You snuggled closer to him, getting comfortable against his chest. “You win, Allen”
Barry smiled still, clearly satisfied with the result. He laid back, grabbed such a big handful of popcorn that many of them fell right out of his hand, and shoved the rest into his mouth. You shook your head at him, fondly watching. It was incredible how easily he made everything better.
“This movie’s really good!” He suddenly exclaimed, pointing at the screen. His voice was muffled by the enormous amount of popcorn still in his mouth.
“You’re a lost cause” You giggled, wondering if he realized how happy he made you.
Even as he chewed on the popcorn, he was smiling. Once he finally swallowed, he glanced at you and dedicated you an innocent grin.
“But you love me”
“How can’t I?”
“You’re smiling…”
“And whose fault is that?”
He didn’t say anything, only looked ahead to the screen. However, his satisfied smirk was telling enough. It warmed your heart to see he was so happy over seeing you smile.
The silence suddenly felt comfortable as you both returned your glances to the movie. In reality, you weren’t even that interested in it. You knew the movie by heart, and taking in consideration that Barry was with you, you preferred to focus your attention on him.
Resting over him, feeling his arms fondly squeeze you, the stress started to melt away. The exhilarating feeling of coziness enveloped you, and you dearly treasured it. You absently reached out to grab one of the snacks that you had put on the table. Coincidentally, Barry was reaching out for the very same on. When your hands grazed, you both chuckled and looked at each other, stuttering apologies.
“S-Sorry, Y/N, go ahead”
“No, it’s fine… you can have it”
You both paused for a moment, forgetting about the movie and the snacks and everything. The world itself seemed insignificant compared to the sudden beauty in his loving eyes, in his gentle expression. You gawked at him, wondering if he had been always this adorable. None of you said anything at first, only lingering in that position and staring at each other still.
Barry didn’t look away from you either as he picked up the wrapper and softly put it on your hand. His fingers lingered, gently brushing against yours. They were soft and warm.
“You… you don’t want it, Barry?”
“No, I know you like them…”
“Thank you”
“No problem, Y/N”
He gave you butterflies. The tender way in which he spoke, in which he looked at you, in which he said your name, how determined he had been to improve your day. Just… him. Barry Allen. You realized it was now hard to breathe, but in a surprisingly wonderful way.
“Uh… is that better?” He piped up in the end. “Are you comfortable?”
“Y-Yeah” You blushed when you realized your head was leaning on his shoulder still as you looked up at him. “Thanks…. thanks for everything”
Barry nodded and smiled, staring at you. He didn’t say anything about your head on his shoulder. You didn’t move, afraid that if he noticed he might say something. The last thing you wanted to do was move from that position.
His fingers brushed against yours some more, moving to be slowly placed in the spaces between yours. It was a nonchalant movement at first, mindless and familiar. Then it changed. Hesitant, asking a silent question. You brushed your fingertips against his in return.
Just then, something appeared in his eyes as they widened, a realization just like yours. This certainly wasn’t like your usual movie nights. You could nearly hear the missing beat of his heart before it continued racing.
Barry opened his mouth, ready to say something. The only thing he managed was awkward stutters. You smiled, knowing you would accomplish just as little if you tried to speak.
“I, um… oh!” He finally said, picking up the remote. “This is your favorite part”
Your friend increased the volume of the movie. It came to your attention that it was quite advanced now, and it made you feel silly. Nonetheless, you wouldn’t change a thing. Everything was absolutely perfect.
As you two pretended to watch the movie, you started getting sleepy. The sudden exhaustion that washed over you was shadowed by immense comfort.
“So… do you, uh…” Barry uttered. “Do you wanna talk about it?”
“About what?”
“Your bad day”
“Oh, that…” Your eyes closed, and your free hand moved to rest against his chest. The other was still grazing against his. “It isn’t such a bad day anymore”
Maybe that was why you hadn’t called Barry before. You didn’t want to admit to yourself that you needed him. Yet there you were. Now that you were with him, needing him didn’t feel like such a bad thing. In fact, it felt right.
Barry’s chest moved under your palm as he took a deep breath. For a moment, you feared your touch was making him uncomfortable. Just when you were about to retrieve your hand, however, his free hand pressed against yours as well in a delicate gesture.
You smiled and moved your hand up until it held on to his shoulder, allowing you to snuggle even closer against him. Barry chuckled, pressing your palm further into his chest.
“I’m glad I could make your day better, Y/N” Barry paused for several seconds, but you didn’t answer. “Y/N?”
When you still didn’t reply, he didn’t insist. Instead of it, Barry heaved a dreamy sigh. The sweet embrace of slumber was starting to take over you, and you couldn’t remember being so happy as you were in that moment. So much for a bad day.
Threatening to end your perfect tranquil, you felt Barry try to pick you up without stirring you. His hand gingerly snuck under your legs as he tried to gather your form in his arms.
“Mm... what are you doing?” You uttered, rubbing your cheek against his shoulder.
“I thought you fell asleep” He whispered, causing his voice to be barely audible over the background noise of the TV. “I was taking you to bed, it’ll be more comfortable”
You shook your head, nuzzling his chest and pressing further into him.
“No, it’s perfect” You groggily said, holding on to him. “It’s perfect, here with you”
“Aw” Barry let out a flustered chuckle. “Y-You’re gonna make me blush, Y/N”
Although sleepy, you made an effort to peer up at him. You felt slightly delirious both from the exhaustion and from how stupidly happy you were at that moment, but you still didn’t care when you started giggling. Barry was blushing, and smiling so wide that his cheeks had to hurt.
“Will you stay with me, Barry?”
“Of course, Y/N”
Tag list: @call-me-harley-quinn / @wonderlandfandomkingdom / @locke-writes / @emmacata / @galactic-magick // If you want to be added or taken off the tag list for these fandoms or characters, send me an ask!!
#barry allen x reader#barry allen imagine#justice league#justice league imagine#snyder cut#dc#dc imagine#ficlet#barry allen ficlet#justice league ficlet#dc ficlet#rfi writings#reader insert#not requested#faves#barry allen
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The 8 Theory-Folklore’s Commentary on Youth
Yesterday, I took note of @taylorswift and her careful attention to the number 8.
“Not a lot going on at the moment” had 8 words. The 8th track is “august,” which is also the 8th month in the year. She has 8 deluxe editions of her album. Many attributed this to Folklore being Taylor’s 8th album. I thought it meant either a.) we needed to pay very close attention to track #8 or b.) that 8 references infinity, a.k.a “forever and ever.”
To my surprise, I was actually selling Taylor Swift short.
When listening to the album, there’s a lot of back and forth in emotion and circumstance. I was confused about the order, especially when the strikingly sobering “hoax” followed the self-aware almost-tranquility of “peace.” Then it hit me. There are two schools of thought going on.
There are 16 tracks on Folklore (excluding the bonus track none of us have heard). 16/2=8. This means there are 2 equal emotional song threads on the album. In other words, you can get two drastically different lessons listening to each group of 8.
When you separate the even numbered tracks from the odd numbered tracks you get the following:
Odd
the 1
the last great american dynasty
my tears ricochet
seven
this is me trying
invisible string
epiphany
peace
Even
cardigan
exile
mirrorball
august
illicit affairs
mad woman
betty
hoax
Odd Interpretation:
Starting with “the 1” and “the last great american dynasty,” the lyrics are very upfront in showing that the protagonists are making fully intentioned mistakes. “the 1” says, “in my defense, I have none for never leaving well enough alone” (I see you “ME!” reference). In “the last great American dynasty” it says, “she had a marvelous time ruining everything.” These characters’ folly is their youth-induced selfishness. They’re casual in the harm they cause because they distance themselves from it. They’re fine with what they don’t look at closely. When you’re young, you make a mess of things in service of YOUR need. Your need for companionship. Your need for the thrill of danger. Your need to make your mark, to be somebody, to leave something behind. The marvel of the excitement and the chase and the very vitality of teens to 20-somethings’ shenanigans blinds us to the scale of our destruction…
…until you have no choice but to face the consequences of your recklessness.
The next track, “my tears ricochet” is not your average track 5. It functions as a pivoting point. Now our narrator is the hurt party, the one baring the brunt of callous treatment. Fickle mistreatment is no longer so casual. Now it’s a torment, and the tormentor learns the scale of their damage. So much so, that they get burned too. They learned their lesson at a terrible price, but what’s most important is that they learned.
“seven” is a long-overlooked memory revisited. In this picture of naïve innocence, the narrator tells of their childish belief in the impossible. Through magic and play pretend and fantasy they are invincible. They have all the control in the world to control the world they live in. Obviously, this is a flawed perspective that everyone eventually grows out of. Fairy tales don’t solve real problems. The point is that their sense of self-importance is in service of a stronger moral compass than the first two songs. If we accept our responsibility to others, to do what we can to ensure their welfare, are we not better and more satisfied people for it?
“this is me trying” hears that lesson and attempts to walk the walk. Part of being responsible to your fellow human is taking accountability when you fumble. The narrator doesn’t know what to say or how to make it right. What they do know is that they’re here, they’ve put the bottle down, and that they’re willing to try what’s necessary to heal what they’ve hurt.
“invisible string” gives us the reward we’ve been waiting for. The narrator says, “cold was the steel of my axe to grind for the boys who broke my heart, now I send their babies presents.” This is someone who has gone from lashing out in anger at a partner from a burned relationship to genuinely wishing them well in their next stage in life. It’s a powerful testament when you can recognize that youth drives us all to make hurtful decisions and that no one is immune to change if they truly want to change. When you let the anger and lies go, the strings that tied you to them fade away. All that’s left is the string you want to hold onto. The string tied to the one who matters, because you’ve made the conscious decision to deduce that their worth as a person should equal yours. It’s a painful path to traverse through, but when you do it’s all worthwhile. That’s why the narrator can say with confidence “hell was the journey but it brought me to heaven.”
In any other album, a song like “invisible string” would be the quintessential emotional payoff for this story arc. However, because this album is a masterpiece, we have a different payoff point in “epiphany.” “epiphany” takes us out of the world of a romantic relationship. We hear descriptions of war and nurses dealing with the despair of this international pandemic. This point in this emotional thread is that it powerfully declares it’s not enough to do no harm nor is it enough to just empathize with your romantic partner. You MUST show your responsibility to your fellow man. Stand beside them. Empathize with them. See them as whole human beings. Do good by them. In other words, it is our duty to do right by everyone, for everyone bleeds, loves, and dies.
The 8-song selection ends with “peace.” The song begins by saying that their, “coming-of-age” has come and gone.” I believe this (along with “invisible string”) to be the most overtly “Taylor Swift” track in perspective. This is her speaking as herself. She lets us know that she’s grown through taking her mistakes, and the mistakes she learned through folklore, into account. She is overly aware of her flaws and feels she pales in comparison to her partner. Rather than allow those insecurities to manifest in unchecked rage or resentment, she takes it as a challenge for herself to do better. She knows she can never give him complete peace (due to inside and outside factors), but she can make the choice to give him unselfish promises and embrace the entirety of her partner’s life. This is a person who has learned the value of selflessness in love and life, which makes this whole thread worth everything.
Even Interpretation:
“cardigan” foreshadows the eventual failure of the even path. The odd interpretation I just described culminated in the narrator finding their place with “the one” because they’ve left everything petty and casually cruel behind. In “cardigan” it says “chase two girls, lose the one.” On top of this directly referencing the first track, it also implies the partner’s self-destruction. By toying with two girls, James is losing “the one.” I don’t think losing “the one” means that you keep one of the two of them. I think it means that engaging in that kind of behavior makes you into a person that isn’t ready, or worthy, of “the one” that they are meant to be with forever. Meeting and keeping “the one” has to require each partner to love themselves and their partner wholly, truly, and selflessly. They can’t be a cardigan you pick up and only wear on the weekends. They must be a wholehearted commitment.
“exile” shows the blowout from “cardigan.” The two couldn’t stay together, and Bon Iver’s (character’s) toxicity comes out full force. He thinks her new man is lesser than him. He’s prepared to throw punches despite being at fault over a hundred times. He’s seen the film before, and he didn’t like the ending because it didn’t work out for him. He wants her under his thumb, not having learned from his prior relationships that that just can’t work. They leave out the side doors, neither fully ready to confront the problems head on.
“mirrorball” is daring in its shift of focus. While all of the tracks I’ve mentioned thus far have dealt, in some way, with the problems that result from a young person’s selfishness, this song doesn’t do that. This song illustrates an extreme that young people participate in at the opposite end of the spectrum; radical selflessness. To be selfless means that you should never allow something that harms someone else to happen just because it benefits you. Young people, girls in particular, are often groomed to interpret selflessness differently. Their definition is synonymous with accommodation. Change your looks, change your personality, don’t object, and embody what your partner wants so that they’re happy. That’s why the symbol is the mirrorball in the song. It reflects everything in the room but itself. By explicitly not factoring in their own sense of self-respect in a relationship, they are unknowingly and tragically enabling their partner’s mistreatment. To be clear, that doesn’t mean abuse is their fault if they have low self-esteem. It’s not, even remotely. But not having the capacity to defend your self-worth is what keeps so many drawn into toxic relationships there for so long. This radical selflessness manifests itself in the other woman too. In “august” it explicitly says that she was living on the, “hope of it all” and that she would cancel plans in the name of a potential hookup with someone who was never hers. The idea of radical selflessness culminates in “illicit affairs” when one of the women deals with their addictive compulsion toward someone who treats them like a cheap lay. Their relationship is a secret that leaves her feeling used in parking lots and as though any trace of her is gone. These three songs have taken the desperate hopelessness of “Abigail gave everything she had to a boy who changed his mind” to the extreme.
Many have speculated that “mad woman” is a commentary on the Taylor/Scooter conflict and I’m inclined to agree. However, if I were to assign an interpretation that goes with my theory, I would say that “mad woman” details the unforeseen consequences of a tormentor’s abuse. When a toxic partner performs bad behavior, their expectation is that they will always be found in the right. After all, Taylor noted on her previous album that for men, “everyone believes [them].” So in the face of lies about her character that everyone believes, she gets rightfully angry. Her anger is their affirmation. For many, a woman being angry on her own behalf is “crazy” and “irrational.” What kind of a society have we set up? A society that promotes women to lack self-worth and, should they find it, they’ll meet a whole other exile.
“betty” is our complete look into James’ perspective. On its own, it sounds like a big romantic gesture to get behind. However, this path is very clear to put “cardigan” first. “cardigan” says, “I knew you’d miss me once the thrill expired and you’d be standin’ in my front porch light.” Lo and behold, in “betty” he shows up to her party when she doesn’t want to see him and asks if she would, “kiss [him] on the porch in front of all [her] stupid friends.” It’s an absolute punch in the gut. Betty knows in “cardigan” that he would come back after he had his fun with another girl, but that she would take him back when he saw momentary value in her again. James in “betty” claims he didn’t know anything, but that’s just an excuse. He knew what he was doing, he knew that he would be able to pick up her broken pieces with ease, he knew he could isolate her from her friends, and he knew that he could capture the imperfect “comfort” of that cardigan again.
This path ends in the final even-numbered song, “hoax.” In the odd numbers, “peace” shows a lesson learned. This even path shows what happens when we don’t learn. The seeds of youth-driven mistakes have led us here. The narrator wants nothing outside the pain of this faithless love. Without learning what it means to be selfless, the traumas of these young relationships create a never-ending cycle. The narrator knows that the “love” is a “hoax” but doesn’t care because that’s all they have. There’s no point to wanting anything else. Without the perspective of age, of truly going beyond that, they’re stuck in a truly dark place.
Final Thoughts:
Taylor Swift is an exceptional artist for a lot of reasons. No one makes albums this good this far into their career. Most artists teeter off after two or three because they retread. Their audience inevitably gets bored of them e same thing time and again. Repeating themselves is something that a lot of artists do because they want to go with the formula of what works. With Folklore, Taylor has done what few artists have dared to do. She’s allowed her discography as a place to uncompromisingly expand her worldview and challenge her listeners. She’s not reiterating previous lessons to make another quick sale. Instead, every album prior has been a steppingstone. As she said at the Time 100 Gala, she has truly turned her lessons into her legacy. From a variety of narrators, she has brought what I decree to be her best album to date. This wouldn’t happen for anyone else 8 albums into their career, but she’s done it by devoutly embracing age’s wisdom.
Learn from the highs and lows presented in these paths. As all good folklore does, it teaches us how to live better. It is our duty to live selflessly and with self-assured dignity. These writings, I have no doubt, will become integral to the legend that is Taylor Alison Swift.
#folklore#taylor swift#ts8 theories#ts8#the 1#CARDIGAN#the last great american dynasty#exile#MY TEARS RICOCHET#mirrorball#seven#august#this is me trying#illicit affairs#invisible string#mad woman#epiphany#betty#peace#hoax
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I can not with the emotional journey of this chapter. Everyone in this chapter just losing their shit (including me). This some magical stuff, kudos to you 🙌🏾 So glad we got more info about the engagement! Some other things I found interesting…
What would a world look like without Alexander Lightwood?
This was so intriguing for me because we saw just how much Alec’s existence weaves seamlessly into the deepest parts of Magnus. The fact that he kept checking his own heart to remind himself that Alec can never truly die. That even if he has to face the fact that Alec is no longer physically here, he will always live on within Magnus. Of course though, we saw Magnus avoid even that, pushing away every notion of his sanctuary being invaded by fear and rather pretending like everything was okay. Waiting for the daily flowers, reminding himself Alec will call back, watching old videos, shutting down and clinging to every fragment of Alec that exists in his life. I think it really confirmed that to Magnus, Alec is not just the man he loves, he is essence of harmony within him. He helps to keep him strong, shows him love Magnus thought he never deserved, protects his most vulnerable self, worships every part of Magnus’ existence. Magnus has become so dependent on that steady flow of peace in his life, that without it he knows no other life. I think that’s why he held on so tight, there is no happy Magnus Bane without the love of Alexander Lightwood.
Magnus’ anger
On the other hand seeing Magnus completely flip was wild. Just all that anxiety and fear he buried erupting and burning every person in its path. I think Magnus’ anger really came from this place of feeling so exposed by his love. He knew that there was every reality Alec could be taken from him but he was never truly falls for how vulnerable it would make him feel. That he would lose that sense of safety he had taken so long to find for himself. I also think it’s the powerlessness of knowing there was nothing he could do to bring Alec home to him, there is nothing he can do to erase the pain and emptiness he feels inside. I also think his anger and him being horrible to his friends and Alec’s family was this way of avoiding his feelings of abandonment (losing his mum). Never really having a stable home, finally finding one for that love to be taken from him. Him acting out is this combination of denial, self loathing, pity, guilt and escapism. Using alcohol, erasing Alec’s possessions, lashing out, avoiding his job, denying himself happiness to distance himself from the pain. To him it’s like punishing himself for ever having hope that things will be different, being done with trying to satisfy others, losing that piece of himself that was bound to Alec. No wonder our poor baby runs, he never truly had someone to teach him to stay and fight or have a love worth believing in until Alec.
I finally found someone I love and want to spend the rest of my life with
Okay after this line I can totally understand by Alec ran in to save Imasu. Not just because his self sacrificial and felt guilty about sleeping with Imasu’s fiancé. I also think a part of him was like ‘I took that away from Magnus’ (marriage) and now he has found someone to have a married life with that can be there for him in ways I never could. In a way this is almost like an extended apology? Not just for declining Magnus’ proposal but also for all the horrible things he said and for breaking Magnus’ heart so many times. Showing Magnus that he wants him to be happy even if it can’t be with Alec.
“Magnus. Hi. Hi, baby.”
The honest cutest 🥹🥹🥹. I’m so ready for the hurt/comfort next chapter. Someone’s gonna ugly cry and it’s prob gonna be me.
Other notable mentions
- Magnus’ friends and the Lightwoods showing him forgiveness and acceptance. Working together to support him and keep him safe.
- Alec’s speech to his squad. Always putting other people’s safety and happiness first. His heart is so beautiful.
- Malec arguing during a literal fire. omg some Shakespeare shit istg.
- Alec channeling his inner TK to go rescue Imasu (chaotiqqqqqq)
(Nathan is the one Imasu is in love with? Right right? I’m so ready for that explanation cause all these mf dumb af 🙃)
Take care lovely Eeshu! 💃🏽
This was an emotional roller coaster while writing too. I got so many feels while writing this too—especially at the end.
If someone asks me an explanation of every character’s reasoning—I’ll show them THIS ASK.
YOU SAID EVERYTHING BEAUTIFULLY LIKE ALWAYS. Both about Magnus and Alec. Magnus felt a deep sense of loss—about Alec, their future. He felt helpless and self-destructed. Everything came together and Magnus did a whole 180 from him usual self. It was very human of him.
P.S. And yes. Nathan is the one Imasu is in love with. wait what?? I gotta cook up some explanation too? can we all pls pretend like I already did that lmao.
P.P.S. Bold of you to assume there’s any hurt/comfort in the next chapter. Shits gonna get worse homies sksbahskwkw
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Valentine's Day Reylo Fic Recs
It has been a dark and cold winter and reading about these two idiots has been keeping me sane. Here are some romantic and Valentine themed fics to warm the cockles of your heart. No surprises here - these are all Modern AU ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Image by @m1ssjess
Send a Little Love My Way by dawninthemtn | Teen | oneshot | 4k | modern AU | Valentine's Day | Strangers to friends | Ben POV | "Marketing executive Ben and mailroom clerk Rey spend a lonely Single's Awareness Day going through Ben's care package from his mother and make a special Valentine's Day connection along the way."
In Full Bloom by deedreamer (need ao3 account to read) | @deedreamer | Teen | Oneshot | 10k | Modern AU | single dad Ben Solo | florist Ben Solo | Multi POV | Highschool teacher Rey receives a mysterious bouquet of flowers. It might have been a delivery error, but her attraction the florist is no mistake.
Something Stupid by HarpiaHarpyja | @thisgarbagepicker | Teen | 8k | Oneshot | Modern AU | Friends to lovers | idiots in love | rey loves baked alaska | Rey POV | Good friends, Ben and Rey, always spend Valentine's together: at their favourite restaurant, exchanging cheesy cards and people watching. but this year Ben has a 'real date' and Rey doesn't know how to feel about it.
Lay All Your Love On Me by walkingsaladshooter | Explicit | Oneshot | 6k | Modern AU | Friends-with-benefits to lovers | smut | Multi POV | "In which Rey and Ben decide they don't want to bother with Valentine's Day hookups."
Single Riders Only by kaybohls | @kaybohls | Explicit | 16k | complete | modern Au | Disneyland | Valentine's Day | fake/pretend relationship | strangers to lovers | one-night-stand | a love letter to the parks | smut | Ben POV | Ben is dragged to Disneyland as a 3rd wheel on Valentine's day. When he keeps bumping into a cute Disney-afectionado he realizes his day might not be ruined after all.
Spending Valentine's Day Solo by jyn-z-solo | @jynz-andtonic | Explicit | 9k | oneshot in two parts | Modern AU | Co-workers | idiots in love | misunderstandings | First dates | smut | multi POV | "Rey has the hots for her coworker, Ben, and decides to send him a Valentine's Day card. While at the shop choosing one, she bumps into him. Too embarrassed to confess it’s for him, she lies about the intended recipient. Ben is in love with Rey and gutted the card is for someone else!"
No Chance, No Way by AttackoftheDarkCurses | Explicit | 46k | complete | modern AU | A/B/O | co-workers | journalism | Going on dates for research | Snowed in | smut | a/b/o heat/rut | Multi POV | Rey has been on so many bad dates that she barely registers when her co-worker takes her on a fantastic date. Too bad it's just research for an article he's writing...
Start Me Up, Watch Me Go by bobaheadshark | Explicit | 8k | Complete | Modern AU | Strangers to lovers | First Dates | one-night-stand?? | Mechanic!Rey | Lawyer!Ben Solo | Multi POV | "Ben Solo takes The Falcon in for maintenance on Valentine’s Day, and gets more than he bargained for when he meets firecracker mechanic Rey Johnson."
Cindereyla by ElegyGoldsmith | @elegygoldsmith | Explicit | Oneshot | 5k | Modern AU | Valentine's Masquerade Party | Cinderella elements | strangers | one-time-thing | bathroom sex | Ben POV | "In which Ben Solo has a really huge cock, and mysterious masochist "Kira" (Rey) wants to give it a ride."
Let Me Slap...With Love by starfleetjedi | @omfgreylo | Explicit | 10k | complete | Modern AU | Boss/employee dynamic | crack | mutual pining | Smut | multi POV | "Ben receives a highly inappropriate anonymous Valentine at work, which he proceeds to accidentally forward to his assistant, Rey."
lilies of the valley (cover me with kisses, make my garden grow) by diasterisms | @kylorenvevo | Explicit | oneshot | 8k | Modern AU | Flowershop AU | Smut | Multi POV | "How do I say Fuck You in flowers!?" Ben Solo is a snobby florist, Rey is a college student. They have chemistry but Ben is a self sabotaging idiot.
Romantic Fic's
Not necessarily Valentine's Day themed, but some *chef kiss* fics with super satisfying romance. Some are smutty, some are not.
Sip the Honey Sweet by dietplainlite | General | 14k | complete | Historic AU | 1900's | Prince Edward Island | Jewish Ben Solo | School teacher Rey | story within a story | falling in love | heartbreak | reconcilliation | HEA | Rey POV | Rey catches the eye of a man no one has been able to catch. Tentative friendship blossoms into something beautiful-- but Ben's past haunts him. We accept the love we think we deserve after all.
The Idiot's Guide to Flirting by Violetwilson | Teen | 2k | Oneshot | Modern AU | strangers to lovers | idiot in love | Ben POV | Ben sucks at flirting with the cute bookstore clerk.
The Assistant by OptimisticBeth | @optimisticsprinkles | Teen | 2k | oneshot | Modern AU | Office dynamic | awkward!Ben Solo | Multi POV | "Rey is Poe's assistant and specifically tasked with keeping Ben out of Poe's office. "
To Confess by Celia_and | Teen | 2k | oneshot | Modern AU | Friend group dynamic | college/university | multi POV | "This will finally be the night that three years of mutual pining is over for Ben and Rey, if Rose and a drinking game have anything to say about it."
From friends to this by Ever-so-reylo | @ever-so-ali | Explicit | 3k | oneshot | modern AU | falling in love | running marathons | Smut | Ben POV | snippets of Ben and Rey's relationship going from friends to something more.
Good by Ever-so-reylo | @ever-so-ali | explicit | 3k | oneshot | Modern AU | blind date | falling in love | smut | praise kink | Ben POV | Ben goes on a date with Rey just to please coworker phasma. He never in a million years expected to fall so hard.
Sweet Home by Violetwilson | @violetwilson | Explicit | 8k | oneshot | Strangers to lovers | one night stand | good samaritan | Waffle House | there was only one bed | smut | Rey POV | Rey helps out a handsome stranger stranded in town-- by letting him sleep in her bed.
your boots beneath my bed by irridesca | @earstwo | Explicit | 11k | Oneshot | Modern AU | Ranching | Cowboys | Strangers to friends to lovers | hair braiding | smut | Rey POV | After the death of her former boss, Rey gets a job as a wrangler at Skywalker Ranch-- where she crosses paths with the prickly forman Ben Solo.
One Last Thing by Celia_and | 12k | Complete | Modern AU | Near-death-experience | co-workers | mutual pining | angst | CPR | Hospitalization | HEA | found family vibe | smut | Ben POV | Rey dies from an allergic reaction to a bee sting, thankfully her co-worker Ben knows CPR and saves her life. As she lies in a hospital bed recovering Rey comes to a realization.
In Bloom by Celia_and | Explicit | 13k | Complete | Modern AU | Soulmates | Ballet | falling in love | angst | Friends to lovers | smut | Rey POV | In a world where matching flower tattoos bloom on the skin of Lovers, Rey is devastated that Ben's skin remains bare.
And Closer Still Is Never Enough by lovefrompluto | Explict | 15k | oneshot | Historic AU | Royalty | Arranged marriage | strangers to friends to lovers | pining | slow burn | Smut | Ben POV | He has put off marriage for too long and now his mother had made the choice for him: duchess Rey of Exegol. She is stranger in a strange land.
We Stand Just a Little Too Close by walkingsaladshooter | Explicit | 22k | Complete | Modern AU | Fake/pretend relationship | Friends to lovers | smut | Alternating POV | Ben and Rey are sick of their friends teasing them about their platonic relationship-- to teach them all a lesson they decide to fake date. Nothing could possibly go wrong with that, right?
sorry, wrong number by orphan_account | Teen | 20k | complete | Modern AU | Texting | Strangers to friends to lovers | aniexty/depression/OCD | angst | falling in love | smut | Multi POV | A meme sent to the wrong number connects two lonely souls, both dealing with their own grief and challenges that will change both their lives for the better.
oh autumn, oh teakettle, oh grace by diasterisms | @kylorenvevo | Explicit | 30k | complete | Modern AU with a magical twist | Strangers to lovers | Road trip | reference to ancient greek/roman mythology | smut | Ben POV | Ben Solo, lawyer and grump, is on the work trip from hell when his whole world is flipped upside down when he meets an honest-to-god Drayd. Regina -Rey- who has been trapped in a tree for the past 200 years. Ben find himself road tripping with her across the British(?) countryside.
Just You by charcuterie | @chimichangasaredelicious | Explicit | 32k | WIP | neighbors | texting | banter | idiots in love | angst | Multi POV | Rey and Ben are two strangers across an alley way who bond over Ben's piano playing. Their souls connect before they even see each other's faces. When they finally do meet face to face sparks fly.
(won’t you let me) walk you home from school by somethingdifferent | Explicit | 130k | complete | Modern AU | Teachers | Co-workers | Enemies-to-lovers | Hate-to-love | slow burn | fuck buddies | idiots in love | smut | Ben POV | Ben is an asshole. A former lawyer, turned high school councilor who works at the prestigious private school that he, himself, was expelled from. Rey is an adorable art teacher who is everything he despises and who does not take his shit. They clash to say the least. He hates her. Then he wants to fuck her. Then he falls in love with her. If he plays his cards right he might get everything he never knew he wanted. | Jessie's note: this might be the greatest enemies-to-lovers I have ever read! The prose is top notch, the characterization is fascinating, the slow transition from hate-to-attraction-to-love is so brilliantly done.
Happy Reading!
#reylo#reylo fic rec#reylo fandom#reylo fanfic#reylo fic#reylo fanfiction#ben x rey#i was going to add my favourite smutty fics too but this got huge and i am so tired#while making this list i re-read over half of these fics and boy do i still love them#i also kinda feel guilty for not adding my two cents to each one but i am so tired#did i mention i am tired?#i realize its still a week and a bit till Valentine's day#but we are already decorated at work and i freaking like the aesthetic#and i am a hopeless romantic
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5 ships I hate, why I hate them, how to (kinda) fix them, the better ships you should be doing in that universe, and why you should ignore me and keep writing them if it makes you happy.
Note: this is done for amusement, please don’t be offended; I’m not attacking your ship, I’m just listing some ships I do not always care for, and how I think they could be improved, and maybe made brilliant, by clever writing.
In no particular order, and focusing on ships that often annoy me, with no attempt by me to say anything meaningful or popular about the current state of any particular fandom. I’m also a firm believer in the idea that there’s no such thing as a bad ship, only a badly executed ship, so my objections to these is less a dislike of shipping, or the paring, and more that they raise writing issues that I think are difficult to fix in a satisfying way. That’s why in a lot of the examples below I prefer AU ships to ones that try to messily work it into the cannon. Anyway, enjoy... I guess?
Marco x / anyone (Animorphs)
Why I hate it: Animrophs is an intensely character-driven story, where the tension of each book comes from the conflicts, external and internal, that the five Animrophs (and Ax) face during a long, hard, traumatic war. And while several of the character are paired off romantically, it’s always to emphasise character conflict over their different points of view. Jake and Cassie are a pair because Jake’s struggle with having to make hard, grey, morally ambiguous choices as leader is highlighted by Cassie’s burning need to make the right choice, the lesser evil, the choice that leaves some small shred of humanity and dignity and kindness left in this bleak world. Tobias and Rachel are a pair as their arcs deal with literal and figurative loss of humanity, as the slow accumulation of trauma over time turns these happy(ish), normal kids into psychologically ruined husks of their former selves and destroys them slowly, one fight at a time.
Marco’s arc, isn’t about either of these things: Marco’s arc, is about the bright, clear line between A and B, between problem and solution. Marco is a utilitarian, a pragmatist: his concern isn’t the burden of leadership, or the cost of the decision, but about how to put that all aside and make hard decisions that actually work regardless of cost. It’s not about what to do, the path is obvious: the bright, clear line of ruthless logic, but how to do it. His match, his counterpoint, the other character who’s all about the logic of taking awful decision in a way that actually works for the team, and his foil, his female counterpart in this, is not a romantic partner, but his mother: Visser one, making the exact same hard, difficulty ruthless decisions using logic and maths, but for the other side of this war. A romantic paring gets in the way of this arc because a partner doesn’t help him with that bright, clear line, and worse, any attempt to pair him of with either Rachel or Cassie breaks up not only a cannon paring, but their respective character arc.
How to (kinda) fix this: Marco’s arc is, at the end of the day, a trolly problem. So make sure whoever you ship him with is one of the people tied to the tracks. Introduce a character he crushes on, and then in the second act reveal that they are either a Controller, or in the family of a Controller or the proximity of the target of their next mission in a way that will make them collateral damage ,and let Marco struggle with what happens when that bright, clear logical line from A to B cuts through someone he actually loves; you know, like it did with his mother. See, even trying to fix this ship is weirdly Freudian.
The far better ship you should be doing: Ax x / EVERYONE. Ax in human form is described as a worryingly pretty, worryingly androgynous male of indeterminate race. He is a literally Bishonen alien hedonist with no familiarity with human senses, poor impulse control in human form, and no knowledge or understanding of human courtship rituals, and he can shape-shift, including into other members of the core team if needed to compel a mission, he calls Jake his prince, and he is incredibly close to Tobias, the lonely outcast woobie that the LGBT fans adopted as their poster boy. Come on, the potential for shipping, both with wacky hijinks and sad, tragic star-crossed lovers’ trope is endless. Every line dedicated to Marco shipping is a line of text that could be dedicated to Ax trying to eat a Cinnabon erotically on his first date as a human and hulking out mid way because he forgot just how good they are. What could be better than him leaning into to erotically kiss a team-mate, and then fucking up due to his failure to understand human mouths, making weird mouth sounds, and then licking crumbs of the table in the middle of the mall, in front of the entire school, while his crush awkwardly tried to pretend this is normal? What’s wrong with you Marco-shipper people, do you hate fun?
Riz/Tem (beastars) Why I hate this ship: Okay, just to quickly ask a question, to people who un-ironically like this as a serious ship and not a dark joke, just one little question: What’s wrong with you? I mean,are you okay? Keep taking the meds: the show is VERY clear on that point.
It’s like those people who say Joker X Harley Quinn is their ideal dark, edgy relationship: no it’s not, it’s abusive! Morticia x Gomez is dark and cool but CONSENTUAL and HEALTHY. This… this is a deeply imbalanced person murdering someone and telling themselves after that fact it was special and rare and magical. ITS HOMICIDE! And even if you write that out (and you shouldn’t, because that changes the character arc of every other major character) it’s still got more red flags that a soviet military parade. This is the botulinum of a toxic, one-sided teenage infatuation. Riz’s entire arc is about how he projects his thoughts and feelings about himself onto this idealised, made-up version of his and Tem’s relationship which, from Tem’s point of view, never existed. Riz never loved Tem: he loved the idea of Tem, the idea that someone would see the real him, see his inner pain and accept him anyway, but he never once told Tem this. He didn’t warn him “Hey, because of you I don’t feel I need my meds any more, do you mind if I try not taking them and we can meet and talk about this in a safe, well-lit pace?” He’s not honest with Tem, and on top of that It doesn’t make sense from the point of view of either of the characters for them to be actually, romantically in love (although they were clearly close friends), because it undermines and cheepens Riz desire to just be seen and accepted for his real self, and the cannon Tem X Els ship. It also doesn’t make sense from a story point of view: Riz is a shadow archetype for Legosi. He’s what Legosi would have become if someone hadn’t interrupted his attack on Haru. That’s why Legosi needs to beat Riz with his own hands: because then he’s beating the darker version of himself he’s been carrying with him, and he can finally move on with Haru guilt-free. Having Riz and Tem’s relationship actually be what Riz imagined it to be undoes that. It undoes Riz’s interesting, dark inner struggle between truth and fantasy, it turns Tem’s tragic, unsolved murder that sets the entire story in motion into a just sort of weird Romeo-and Juliet suicide. It’s ruins the character arc not only for Riz, but for Legosi, and also, by extension, Louis and Haru, because Legosi’s internal angst over whether or not herbivores and carnivores can have a relationship as true friends needs this example of a tragic, flawed, toxic, failed friendship to bounce off of.
How it could (sort of) work: an AU where Riz’s attack on Tem is interrupted and Tem lives with a slight arm injury, and doesn’t tell anyone out of his complex feelings for Riz. Meanwhile, that bunny girl from the gardening club had been brutally devoured and Rz and/or Tem are so horrified with how close this was to their own near-miss, they start to investigate the murder, and in doing so get caught up in Louis’ inner struggle. Because that’s how the story needs to work, it’s about duality and struggle: and if Riz takes Legosi’s role, and by dating a herbivore he de facto takes the role, so Legosi must take Riz’s. This could be a great AU!
The better ship you should be doing: Pina/Riz (with a dash of Pina x Els), no, seriously, I’m not shitposting. You want to give Riz a redemption arc with a cute woolly boy? How about a story where Pina, out of a need for closure about at happened to him, starts to visit Riz in jail and they talk, mockingly at first, confrontational at first, but later Pina slowly becoming more fascinated in Riz and Tem’s life and asking Riz for more and more detail until they both bond over their shared traumatic experiences and their sense of loss for Tem’s senseless death, Tem’s unfished life casting a shadow over both off them. Eventually, the two of them find, from Legosi who still has the diary, that Tem had planned out an elaborate and beautiful first date with Els that he never got to take her on, and Riz, guilt ridden and sad than Tem never got this beautiful moment, decides to ask Pina take her on that date for Tem, with Riz coaching him by phone cyano-de-Bergerac style, Riz finally getting some closure that he helped one of Tem’s wishes come true and finally acknowledging to himself that Tem had a life and loves outside of him that were cut of short by his actions, and just crying over his lost friend, as Pina and Els slow-dance in Tem memory. Or if you just want to see Tem awkwardly date a carnivore boy from school, why not something less creepy and more wholesome and ship him with Jack? That would be cute AF, and more importantly, not romanticize brutal murder. Or an AU where everything is happy and nice, I’d argue at that it’s no longer Beastars at that point, but if it makes you happy, go for it. Let’s not shame anyone here.
Snape X Lilly (Harry Potter)
Why I hate this ship: honestly, it’s not for the reason you think; I just like Snape too much as a tragic character, and making him in any way happy destroys his arc in my opinion. The objection’s others have raised: that Snape acts in a worryingly possessive stalker-ish way towards Lilly, and that if Voldemort had gone for Nevil rather than Harry as a child Snape would have remained a loyal death eater, are true and I acknowledge them as having some validity, but that’s not why I can’t stand this ship. Snape is supposed to be a morally and emotionally complex, tragic figure. That “After all this time?” line was the best line in the Deathly Hallows. Snape is supposed to show the equality destructive and redemptive power of love. It’s sort of trinity: Lilly shows the pure power of true, unconditional love in her sacrifice to save Harry, Voldy shows what self-destruction and cruelty a life without understanding love leads to, and Snape sits somewhere in the middle: his one-sided un-requited love being both the cause of his darkest, and his greatest actions. His curse, and his redemption, fall and rise. Making him happy messes that up.
How to (kinda) fix this ship: make them miserable. Make them fall for each-other only to be pulled apart by circumstance (you know, like they were in the darn original source material). You’re serious about making this a tragic, dark romance? Don’t ship them when they’re at school: Ship them during Voldemort’s rise to power, in the 80’s, after Lilly is married. Have the original Order of the Phoenix send her to meet with Snape and use their previous relation to try to milk some information out of him. Have her feel conflicted about it, have James furious about it, but have her do it anyway for the greater good. Have her meet up secretly with Snape who is angry and distrustful, knowing his must be a trap, and talk. Have the relationship slowly build over time against the backdrop of a cold-war spy thriller, as Lilly slowly realizes that she has some lingering feelings for Snape, but can’t reconcile them her loyalty to the order and her family. Make this a love story of conflicted feelings, divided loyalties, and spy-work against the background of drawing war-clouds. Have Snape offer to leave Voldemort, if she’ll leave the Order, and run away with him, but by that point she knows she’s pregnant and chooses to stay, out of loyalty even though she’s crushing on Snape. Have him show up at the rendezvous expecting for her to be there only for James to lead an Order Ambush, and a fight to ensure, on top of Tower Bridge in the howling wind and rain, Snape surviving but having his spirit crushed and fleeing before Lilly can tell him her true feelings. Make it big, and melodramatic, but above all, make it tragic. Because that’s the only way Snape works as a character. Always.
The better ship you should be doing: Ginny X Nevil or Luna x Nevil: You want tragic lovers, at school, with divided loyalties, who never get together in the main cannon because a Potter ruins it and gets the girl? Ginny X Nevil. Write what was happening that final year Harry wasn’t at school when they took Dumbledore’s Army and make it work in earnest. Heck, you could even have Snape, as headmaster, hated by them but secretly trying to protect them as a secondary character to their secret, forbidden love. You don’t want to break up Harry X Ginny? Luna X Nevil is sweet and wholesome, but also tragic as they never get a chance, having their school life taken over by the horror of that final year and the need to fight for their very souls in a school run by Death Eaters and the trauma of the Battle of Hogwarts meaning that in order to put away the past and move on, they need to leave each other behind. Hell, do an AU where they canonically end up together, why not? They deserve happiness.
Dean / Sam AKA Wincest (Supernatural)
Why I hate this ship: They’re brothers. The show even makes a joke about how squick this is. Several times.
How you could (sort of) fix this ship: You can’t: They’re brothers. The show even makes a joke about how squick this is. I guess a body-swap arc could fix this, as it’s less squicky if its just their bodies with someone else’s minds, but seriously, the reasons why this shouldn’t exist are extensively covered in the show, and it was hilarious. To be honest, I don’t hate this ship done as a joke, but I have seen some dark spots on the internet, and I can say with all honesty it’s not always treated as a joke. Some folks are really invested in this, and all I can ask is, is your home life okay?
Now, done as a joke, I’m 110% behind this. This is exactly the sort of insane wacky bullshit that makes for a good crack-fic. For example imagine that the supernatural threat of the week was book that made anything written in it come true, and the brothers are trying to find and destroy it, but they keep getting distracted by their burgeoning romantic feelings for each-other, and suddenly realise that the owner of the book is a fan on the in-universe novels, and writing slash-fic in the book. They need to find the writer before they make them do something they’ll both regret, but it’s just so distracting when Sam’s beautiful eyes are right there and- dammit, Sam, it’s happening again! Make Sam less concerned and even a little amused, with it, but make Dean hate what’s going on. Especially when the writer’s description suddenly makes Sam noticeably better hung that him. Make the villain turn out to be Becky from “Sympathy for the devil” and end with them trying to take the book away as she writes frantically to force them to do her bidding, and you’ve got yourself a good fic.
The better ship you should be doing: Cas/Sam or Cas/Dean or Cas/Sam AND Dean fic. Duh. Once again the show-runners beat the fans to the mark and pointed out that this is the best ship, and then they took it away just to fuck with us.
Any Katniss ship that ignores her obsession with Emotional Security Logic. (The Hunger Games)
Why I hate these ships: Katniss is, briefly put, a mess before the books ever start, her father’s death and harsh upbringing have arguably given her PTSD before she ever volunteers for the reaping, and it doesn’t get better from there. In psychology, Emotional Security Theory (EST) is a hypothesis that the heightened emotions surrounding repeated violent exposures leaves children vulnerable to dysregulated distress responses and eventual psychopathology, aka, why Kat be so messed up. Her internal monologue makes the books completely clear that her choice in partners is not motivated by normal affections, but by deep, deep fear. A fear of loss, abandonment and death that leads her to make every decision about what minimises her, and her sister’s, exposure to potential physical and emotional harm. It’s frantic, fraught, cold survivalist thinking. And the other characters in the book notice and acknowledge it! “Which of us will she pick?” “She’ll pick whoever she can’t survive without.” Kat doesn’t like herself for it, but she does eventually admit to herself that she makes her decisions like this.
How do we fix this ship: Ship Kat with whoever you like, but give her a good reason to pick them: and in Kat’s mind “A good reason” is based on Emotional Security Logic, she needs to have a pressing reason why this ship makes her and her sister safer. Do that, and you’ve got yourself a good Katniss story. Don’t do that, and while you may or may not have a good story, the person staring in it isn’t Katniss Everdeen anymore.
The better ship you should be writing: Finick X Annie. Or, Haymitch prequel ships
FinAnn. This, this ship has some real potential to it, and is criminally underutilized. Finick and Annie’s relationship is one of the most tragic and romantic in the story, and has so much to offer. Or, if you want to have a hard-bitten character from district 12 struggling with trying to find love in the hellish combat of the games, do a prequel in which Haymitch finds love in the capitol during training, but loses then in the area and turns to drink as a result. Heck, you could even have some fun with this and turn it into a dark comedy, or a great tragic love story, whatever you like. It’s got potential, and his backstory is vague enough you could do a lot with it.
So, tell me below why I’m wrong, and have fun with your writing: just because I hate that ship doesn’t mean you should. Enjoy yourselves.
I’m off to write awful Ax/Pina/Luna Polyjuice’d into Nevil/Cas/Finick fiction set at an anime high-school that fights a magical war against other fictional schools, and there’s nothing you can do to stop me. BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
#Shipping#Ships i don't like#animorphs#beastars#harry potter#supernatural#hunger games#im wrong so tell me#i ship bad things#you like what you like#lets not judge#Unless you ship Bellatrix and Hermione that’s just wrong#and you should feel bad#but not as bad as me#riz/tem#snape/lilly#sam/dean#No such thing as a bad ship#enjoy your fics#i can't spell for shit so the edit history on this will change every 10 seconds as i spot typos sorry
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