#just the way his Whole demeanor changes when he understands what's going on. expressions/body language/word choice/tone all of it

[talentforlying]

the orderly in rage of caliban, the episode that evokes constantine's shitty childhood, saying "kids are sponges. they soak up whatever you give them" directly to his face makes me explode. writers i just want to talk.

[hotwings0203]

Decided to do a part 2 (due courtesy of @an-ambivalent and @definitetrashlord for motivating me to even continue this series HEHE💖)

Pt. 1

Tw: manipulation, dubcon, language

It isn’t the cum that slides down your legs continuously, nor the black and blue marks that so obviously covers the expanse of your neck at all times, no.

It’s the constant surveillance you’re under, it’s the lack of conversation you get from your comrades, it’s the way you mold and shift for however he wants you to be that solidifies his hold on you.

The attack from three weeks ago feels like yesterday, the way he held your head up by your hair after he was done ruining you and crooned in your ear that you were his now, and you’d be suicidal if you continued to lash out on his godsent decision plays like a broken record in your head.

You can’t look him in the eyes now, only meekly staring at his feet when he orders you to stand in front of him. Sometimes he’ll circle you and invade in your personal space, standing behind you and leaning in close behind your ear, simply inhaling you and saying nothing. Other times when no one’s around he’ll lounge back on the couch with a beer in his hand, spreading his knees wide while he lazily orders you to dance for him, slowly stripping away your self esteem and clothes simultaneously.

He doesn’t seem to outwardly mind the silence that seeps from you anymore, now that he has your body and attention focused solely on him.

Even Tomura has stopped talking to you just for fun. He’ll try and make a snipe at you, fruitlessly expecting your once-usual comebacks, but all you can do is blearily smile at him.

It makes everyone uneasy how quickly you’ve been reduced to nothing.

You couldn’t leave even if you tried to. Your medical skills were too valuable to be rejected, and Dabi’s scrutinizing tabs on you wouldn’t allow for even a foot stepped outside if not for Shigaraki’s missions.

Even your meals are meager at best, mainly consisting of copious amounts of alcohol and shitty ambiguous burnt food that pops up on the counters randomly.

You feel dirty, like a disease-infested rat. No amount is showering from the dingy stalls, no amount of cheap soap bars wittled down on your body erases the feeling of being used.

Dabi has never been in more love than he has now.

He hopes you like the food he makes, secretly placing it on the bar counter seconds before you sit down. Sure, the food might be a little burnt, but it’s still your favorite right?

It doesn’t matter how expensive the shower products are, he thinks they smell nice and that they’d smell even better on you. Shigaraki can fuck off, he’s not spending too much revenue on his girl, it’s the bare minimum he can do to show you how much he appreciates you playing by his rules...even if he can never say it out loud.

And his favorite part at the end of every day is putting his surely-misplaced words of affection into action, where he can scream with his body against yours how long he’s wanted you for, how thankful he is to any deity that exists that you’ve been placed in his care.

Dabi might be in love, but he’s not stupid though.

He sees the way your body becomes more and more deteriorated, notices the small change of you hesitation to answer him, the way you can never truly look at him, how you retreat to his room more and more(your room has just become a guest room now after he burned all your belongings, rendering you completely dependent on him to supply you with scratchy clothes and feminine products, no matter how embarrassing it is for you). It’s so frustrating to him- you’re not actually doing anything wrong, but you’re not doing it right either. How long does he have to keep threatening you for? Why can’t you just be happy with him? At least pretend like he’s not the villain for once.

He just feels so passionately for you, a word he never thought would be used in his vocabulary. It all bottles up, and sometimes he feels like he isn’t expressing his feelings of love, jealousy at you not giving him enough attention at times, concern over your quiet demeanor, and wanting of you enough.

You’ve never been more broken than you are now.

If it wasn’t bad enough that you bend at his every beck and call, he expects you to understand his body language and cravings without him even saying anything, which is more so often than not. He just stares at you for so, so long. You originally tried to get up and leave after he dragged you over to the couch and plopped you down, but immediately stilled after smoke began curling from his wrists.

“What do you want?”

“Nothing.”

You look at him incredulously, but his lids are lowered at you as he smokes a blunt. And so you exhale in annoyance and run a hand through your hair, closing your eyes to avoid looking into his unnerving glacial eyes.

It’s too bad you don’t see the big red hearts in them that break when you turn away from him.

You’re just so pretty, how can you expect him not to stare?

He tries to get you to do weird things too when you guys are alone and he’s not plowing you into the mattress.

Once on a cool winter night a majority of the League was out hunting for recruits. Dabi, you, and Spinner had done your quotas already-or,rather, Dabi had yanked you by your wrist alongside him through the dark alleyways, growling at you to “Keep your mouth shut and let me do the talking. If I see you looking at any one of these trash kindlings I’ll burn the whole alley up and force you to watch”.

And so while the rest of the party was out, Spinner had mumbled something about needing to take a piss with a pointed glare from Dabi and you were left alone again with your...boyfriend?

He sits down on the crumbling leather and gives you a once over, not saying anything.

You fidget in place, thinking he was going to make you give him another slutty show.

Moments pass, and he snaps, “Well?”

“W-well what?”

“Are you just gonna stand there like some braindead bitch? Sit down.” He leers at you.

You drop into the loveseat at the other end, looking down at your lap. You can’t see his expression, but he scoffs in disbelief.

“Are you actually slow? Get the fuck over here, it’s cold as shit.”

And so you scooch over to him regrettably, knees touching with his as you squirm.

He leans forward and turns to face you, reaching out a hand to brush a strand of hair behind your ear. He notices you trembling and squeezing your eyes shut, so he stops midway.

He sits back again and as soon as you feel his presence retreat you let out our breath.

It hurts his heart to hear it.

You solely turn to face him when he doesn’t say anything, and he points to one of the grimy blankets strewn over the side of the tv. He grunts, and you catch his drift.

You get up to retrieve it, and hear his gravelly voice. “Get the remote too.”

When both items are brought back, Dabi snatches the blanket from you and drapes it over himself contentedly.

What am I, an errand girl?

He tosses the remote at you to your surprise, and you look at him with raised eyebrows.

He props his cheek against a fist and stares briefly at the tv.

You take your chances and press the on button on the remote.

The ancient monitor comes to life, and it takes a few minutes of scrolling through the channels and glancing at Dabi’s face to decide the appropriate one to watch. You settle on some old slasher finally after seeing the scowl on his face lessen at the sight of a rusted blade chopping through some guy’s shoulders.

It’s weird to be sitting there with your bully-turned-beau, watching a horror flick as if your relationship with him was normal. You’re surprised he hasn’t jumped your bones yet, it’s what he always wants to do these days as if you’re planning on leaving and it’s his last dying wish to fuck you.

But he does nothing except for sit there, gazing at the screen with unblinking eyes, bouncing his knee.

He wants you near him.

What, does he have to spell it out for you? Why do you think he even sat you next to him with a blanket and a shitty movie?

Dabi expected you to snuggle up to him the moment you say back down. It’s rather insulting that you haven’t so far, if he’s being honest. Why would a fire user like him need a blanket to keep warm? That was for you.

And the horror movie? The only reason he allowed you to put it on is because he wanted you to jump, scream, flinch-hell, do something so he can put an arm around you and tease you for being scared!

But you just sit there. Stock-still, like a deer caught in headlights. Hands in your lap, back straight up, it bothers him that you’re not relaxing around him.

“Aren’t you cold?” You jump at the break in silence.

Indeed it is cold, the chilly winter draft seeping through the crumbling foundations of the old bar. But you’d resist, not wanting to know where he was going with this.

“Uh, no, I’m good thanks.”

He looks at you like you’re crazy. “You’re literally shaking cold, doll. Come here.”

You turn to him beseechingly, very much not wanting to prolong this. “Dabi...”

You’re met with an icy glare.

And so you begrudgingly scoot closer to him, barely a few inches away. Gingerly picking up the corner of the blanket, you place it over your lap in a faux effort to warm yourself.

Dabi rolls his eyes when he sees this, and pulls you by your arms to fall against his chest.

You gasp lightly at how warm his torso is, and can’t help the shiver that passes over you.

Unable to stop yourself from chasing the warmth amidst the cold night, you huddle closer to him, pressing your palms against his chest to feel more of his heat.

He looks down at your head and gives the slightest twitch of his lips.

His heart swells, and he hopes you don’t hear how embarrassingly loud it’s pounding against your hands.

You slowly start melting in his hold, shifting your leg up adjoining his to seek out more heat, and it makes his cock twitch slightly. He likes you like this: pliant, easy, comfortable. He just wishes you’d talk more, and with less of that apprehension and fear in your eyes

Some minutes pass, the slasher fic having been ended and changing to a rom-com. Dabi doesn’t remember the last time he saw one of those. It must have been back when he was Touya, back when his mom would bake his favorite cookies and him and Fuyumi-chan and Natsu would chase each other around-

You stir in his arms, mumbling a bit from dozing off. Dabi gazes at you, wondering when the day would be when you bake him his favorite meals, when he gets to chase you around and make you giggle instead of chasing you like prey and making you scream.

He rubs up and down you arms soothingly with hot palms as you murmur and begin to wake up. You sit up from his chest and rub your eyes, yawning widely all the while.

It’s only when you focus on him smirking down at you that you jump back as if you’ve been electrocuted.

His smile drops at that.

You scowl at his proximity, mentally face-palming at how you could’ve been lulled to sleep so easily by this dickhead. It wasn’t even that cold, how could you have warmed up so easily to him?

A blast of icy air seemingly coming from nowhere settled over your bones and you shivered violently, rubbing your arms that were warm a minute ago.

Okay, maybe it was a bit cold. But you’d be damned if you willingly became vulnerable for him any more than you had to.

“Is someone tired?” He teased, his white teeth gleaming with his sickening grin.

“Whatever, I’m going to bed,” you mutter and avert your eyes, getting up to go upstairs.

“Good idea, I think I’ll come too.” You don’t need to turn around to hear the smug laughter in his voice, knowing full well that he was making fun of you.

You grumble and stalk upstairs with him right at your heels. At one point he lifts his gaze just to see your cute ass sashaying side-to-side with every step you took up.

He can’t help himself when he reaches a hand out and squeezes the flesh there, causing you to yelp and shoot up the stairs even faster.

Dabi shakes his head and snickers to himself, beelining after you to his quarters.

It’s a medium size-room, not meant for two people but that doesn’t stop him from cramming you in here every night.

You’re already glowering at his sheets, yanking them back and getting ready to dive in when a sudden thought strikes him.

“Have you eaten yet?” He leans against the door, arms crossed and eyebrows raised.

“Yes.” Comes your muddled answer from beneath the comforter.

You did not, in fact, eat anything for almost a day and a half. You couldn’t do it, your stomach was constantly in knots from his presence.

“Don’t lie to me,” his nostrils flare and he glares at you.

“I said I ate already.”

“Yeah? When exactly? ‘Cause if I remember right, i haven’t seen you leave my sight for almost 36 hours now, and none of that time includes when you ate.”

You stay silent, fuming underneath the covers. Why the hell was he so concerned about you? It pisses you off that he’s putting up a fake act of caring about you, just so that he feels less guilty about raping you.

He sighs and shifts to open the door. “Stop being such a bratty little shit. You were doing so well earlier, so keep it that way unless you wanna piss me off.”

Dabi turns the knob and takes a step out of the room. “I’ll ask you one last time before I choose myself- what do you wanna eat?”

“Eat shit.”

It’s so faint and muffled, but he hears it. His eyes widen marginally, his jaw clenches and the brass knob under his inflamed palm starts to steam and bubble.

“What the fuck did you just say to me?”

“I said eat shit!” You throw the covers off and glare at him full on. “Stop pretending like you actually like me, or that you care about me. You’re a crazy fucking rapist, you’re not my father for gods’ sake, so stop trying to be this fake good person!”

The only sound around the room is your soft panting and the squeaking of bubbling metal. Then, it stop.

He steps forward, and speaks softly. “You want me to be the villain so bad?”

Another step forward, and you instinctively retract your legs from the edge of the bed.

“Fine. We’ll play your little game. You’re not leaving this room until I say so, or eating until I give you permission, since that’s what you wanted anyways. Wanna act like a stone cold bitch? Be my guest.”

His posture immediately relaxes, and his smug smile returns as he crosses the room to flip onto the bed.

You look at him in disbelief. “Are you kidding me?”

He turns over and scrolls through his phone.

There’s no way he’s serious. Is he actually planning on keeping you in this room? You’re already limited to the base as it is with him breathing down your back, no way in hell you’d tolerate even more confinement.

Just to check his bluff, you slowly slip off the bed and pad towards the door, one eye over your shoulder to check that he hadn’t turned around. But the second your hand outreaches for the disfigured blob of cooling metal on the door, a massive wave of blue flames lash out mere inches from your hand and between the knob.

You scream and clutch your hand, leaping backwards.

“What the fuck, Dabi?!”

He says nothing, but continues to smirk at his phone.

You take a deep breath and are about to try to open it again his his raspy voice calls out, “I wouldn’t do that if I were you. My nursing skills aren’t as good as yours. And even if you do manage to sever your hand and try again, if you leave then I’ll personally make sure Shigaraki withdraws all your missions here on out.”

You pause at that, cursing under your breath. As much as you knew he’d never admit it to your face, your leader needed Dabi for long distance combat. He was the second most powerful member in the group, so his word was scripture after Shigaraki’s himself. He would do anything Dabi would say if it meant keeping him in the League. You, however, were expendable at the end of the day.

Sighing, you trudge your way back to the rickety bed, grumbling under your breath. He says nothing, simply continuing to scroll through his phone as if he didn’t blast hellfire at you seconds before.

Sleep did not come easily. Even after Dabi put his phone away, he didn’t press up against you like he usually did at night. The empty space behind you was growing colder and harder to ignore.

You tossed and turned for a couple minutes, contemplating what to do. Apparently he was serious when he said he wouldn’t let you leave the room until he said so. So when was he gonna give you the all-clear?

Your stomach rumbled loudly, and you winced clutching it. Damn it. If only you had taken up his offer instead of throwing a tantrum.

Finally, after an excruciating 10 minutes more of deafening silence save for your weeping stomach, you cave in.

“Dabi.”

Silence.

“Dabi, you awake?” You prop yourself up on an elbow and peek over his shoulder. His eyes are closed, but his chest is moving too fast for a slumber.

“Look, I’m...I’m sorry I didn’t listen, okay? I should’ve eaten when you told me to.”

Nothing again.

“Hey.” You lightly shake his shoulder, but no response comes from him.

You sigh in frustration, tapping your fingers on the pillowcase. Suddenly, an idea comes to you, but it makes your stomach recoil in disgust and quiet down its grumbling. Desperation is a bitch.

“Can I make it up to you...?”

And finally, he turns around to face you, one cheek propped against his palm, a lazy grin complimenting his salacious gaze.

“Well, why didn’t you just say so earlier doll?”

You grimace in disgust, mixed emotions at your plan working.

“So what exactly did you have in mind, hmm?” He pouts condescendingly down at you, and you grit your teeth before letting him in on it.

“Um, well..I thought maybe I could...um, y’know, like..I wanna, um...” Oh god. This was more embarrassing than you thought. How are you supposed to ask your captor if you can suck his dick? Usually he just took you fighting tooth and nail, you never fully submitted like this before.

And he knows it too, based on the way his eyes gleam in the silver moonlight and shadows of lust cross his face while looking at your wide eyes and bitten bottom lip, your fidgeting fingers showing nothing but needing pure guidance.

But this isn’t supposed to be easy, he doesn’t want you to feel comfortable, he wants you to feel bad and make it up to him.

To give you a little push, however, he gives toga slight hint as he sits up and leans back against the rickety bedrest, folding his arms behind his head.

“So, what’s it gonna be sweetheart? ‘Gonna stare at me like that all night or are you gonna tell me how you’re gonna make this up to me?”

You look up at him, conflicted for a moment before solidifying your resolve. You shyly reach out a hand and touch the outside of his thigh, slowly rubbing and moving it closer up to the tent in his pelvis.

Oh, this is precious.

“What?” He sneers. “You’ve gotta be kidding me. You were pushing me away earlier, but now you wanna suck my dick? Make up your mind, babe.”

You wince and continue, not backing down from his mean comment. You knew he wanted this, he expected this from you. That’s why even though he’s spitting venom from his lips, his hips are bucking up into your hand as you stroke over his member.

Your fingers move nimbly up and down, around and under his thighs and dick, with him softly cursing in the background as he grows harder and harder.

“Stop being a tease and get to sucking. It’s what you were made for, anyways,” Dabi’s low voice comes out from in between little moans.

Your hand shakes a little bit as you fumble with the drawstrings on his pj’s, and he snickers at your inexperience. When you finally free his length, it bounces out like its on fucking hydraulics, precum beading up at the tip, his shaft coated with an intimidation Jacob’s Ladder.

He watches you lick your lips and he groans under his breath. You’re nervous and scared, but he’s wondering whose heart is beating faster right now. The hand which you use to hesitantly start pumping him is so much softer than his own, and even though he’s gotten fairly accustomed to your body and the feel of it, the sensations multiply tenfold when you do it willingly for him.

Dabi has half a mind to shove your head down onto his shaft when he feels like you’re stalling with your hands, however good they feel. He wants to see you sloppy with saliva dribbling down your chin like a baby.

But he waits. As excruciatingly painful as it is, he wants to see what you’re like when you do things at your own pace, and at your own...comfort? If you can even call it that.

Finally, finally after caving in from his silent flower you get the idea to put it in your mouth.

Your face contorts in disgust as you slowly lower your head and latch your lips onto the slippery bulb, hollowing your cheeks out and sucking hard at the tip.

Dabi hisses and juts his hips up into your mouth, furiously chewing at his burnt lower lip as he holds back a pornographic moan. He knows you’d be startled and embarrassed by it, so he refrains...for now.

That doesn’t mean he’s not gonna tell you what to do, though.

“Yeah, just like that. Suck it like an ice-pop. No, don’t use your teeth idiot. And fondle my balls while you’re at it, too.”

Instructions pour into your ears, one after another as you fumble around trying to satiate his needs. You’re clumsy, which makes it even messier and hotter for him. Various fluids coat your hand and the lower half of your face as you work on him, doing exactly what he says. Sucking and kitten-licking the tip, even going so far as to dip your tongue into the crevice of his tiny hole and rapidly lick up the massive amounts of pre bubbling up after doing so, spiraling your tongue down the piercings and on his shaft until you circle around his balls. Your spit helps as lube to slick up his dick as you pump your hand while nursing on his plush balls.

Dabi, of course, has a hand woven through your hair and randomly jerks down on your head when you hit a good spot. You can tell he’s trying his best to hold back from his way his body and arms shake in self restraint, so you know it’s time to finish things up before his control snaps.

You start stroking him even faster, squeezing a little harder when you move up on his tip and massaging his balls. The soft schlick schlick sounds echo throughout the quiet room, the rustling of his sheets as his legs move to their own accord mute the thudding of both your hearts.

You can tell his orgasm is about to come from the way his cheeks puff up and his chest heaves. Pulling away is futile, as the second he sees recognition in your eyes he finally does what he’s been wanting to do, and slams your head all the way down his length.

He starts actually face-fucking you now, all 7 1/2 inches tightly cramming in your throat. You retch and cry out around his dick, trying to pull your head back but he’s not having it; he pounds the back of your canal and you swear you’ll wake up with a bruised esophagus in the morning.

“Fuck, fuckfuckfuck yes doll, fuck, just a little more, you’re doing so good, my little cumdump huh? You love me, yeah? Of course you do, of course you love your daddy, you’re never gonna leave me you’re gonna stay right here under me like the good little girl you are-“

Filth pours from his mouth as white ropes leave his cock, your already-filled throat flooding with his seed and leaking out of your strained mouth.

You squeeze your eyes shut as he waits for a moment or two, calming his breath down by taking deep inhales in place of his rapid panting. His breath deepens after a minute or two, but he still has an iron grip on the back of your head sealed so tight that the cum is trapped on the inside of your stretched lips.

“Mmmfh!” You cry out and beat at his knee. He finally looks down at focuses on you, squinting and laughing at your predicament.

“Aww what’s wrong, don’t wanna gargle my kids? Would you rather have them someplace else?” He shakes your head back and forth on his softening cock and more seed spills out over your mouth and around his groin.

You painfully pull your head up, and Dabi revels in how you look.

Teary-eyed, your hair a mess, cum and spit coating your mouth like a fucking whore.

You’ve never looked more beautiful to him than you have at that moment.

“Come on, clean me up,” he gestures to the mess on his body, and you grimace.

“Do I have to? I just did what you wanted me to-“

“I thought you were trying to make it up to me?” He raises an eyebrow and looks you up and down.

You sigh and try to do it quickly, ingesting the vile contents and avoiding his cruel grin.

After what seemed like a lifetime, you finish him off and flop down in bed, catching your breath.

“So, was that good enough? Can I go outside now?”

“It’s the middle of the night, where the hell would you go right now?” He fluffs up his pillow and pulls his pants back up, getting ready to actually sleep this time.

“Well, I mean yeah, but...you know what I mean, in the morning you’ll let me go out, right?”

He rolls over to face you, and you can’t decipher what emotion crosses his face as his position blocks out the moonlight. From his body rolled over, the light reflecting off the side of his head would almost make it seem like he had white hair.

“Who said anything about letting you go out?”

You gape at him for a moment, then chuckle nervously. “Come on, don’t freak me out like that. You said that if I made it up to you-“

“I said make it up to me, as in apologize for your bitchy attitude. I didn’t say anything about you leaving. You’re gonna have to do more than a shitty blowjob if you wanna leave this room.”

“Dabi!”

“What? I’m just complying with what you wanted. You didn’t wanna go with me, right? So, I’m playing by your rules.” He says simply, shrugging as if it’s no big deal.

Tears brim up in your eyes. “You’re an asshole.”

“Exactly. Which is why you’re not leaving until I say so.”

You turn over and scoot away from him, ignoring his scoff. But you suppose you couldn’t be too mad, after all.

You don’t know what you were expecting from a villain anyways.

[jvnluvr]

my genshin relationship headcannons!

featuring: xiao, diluc, kaeya, & zhongli! (reader doesn’t have a specified gender, you can decide that for yourself :)

spoilers are mentioned during zhongli headcannons!! please do not read if you have not completed the archon quests for liyue. 

author’s note: i really wrote this more for myself but i decided to post it anyway to share it with all of you. reminder: these are just my headcannons. you might think differently of them and that’s your opinion. anyways, please enjoy this piece of fluff! if you want me to write headcannons for any other male character, please ask and i’ll try my best. i’m going to make this a series :)

• xiao doesn’t understand the concept of love. but he does find it terrifying. how could two humans share that bond? when he realizes that he feels more than just nothing when he’s with you, he freaks out. he’s not himself, and you start to take notice of that.

• when these feelings for you start to emerge, he’s washed over with an overwhelming feeling of protectiveness. over you. he feels the need to protect you, even when his brain knows your completely fine. you know how to fight after all.

• he can’t help it, however. xiao will always ask you to leave the fighting to him, because there’s this one little voice stuck at the back in his mind that tells him that something bad will happen to you. when he realizes you mean more to him, he just can’t afford to lose you. not when he’s lost everyone else.

• “let me protect you, please?” he feels a bit embarrassed asking this, but he’s very serious about it. he’s always there when you are fighting. he wants to help you. and he usually never wants anything to do with humans. because he’s afraid to hurt them. but he’s more afraid to hurt you. you’re so precious to him, more than anything he has ever encountered as an adepti.

• when he confesses, it’s not even a confession. xiao doesn’t know how to love. cut him some slack. he would probably say something like; “let’s be together.” i don’t know. you don’t know how to comprehend what he just said. you guys are already together? like literally. but when you ask the meaning behind his works, he gets all flustered. “how do you not understand? love, that word. that’s what i feel for you.... stupid.”

• after he confesses, and you guys are together, be ready to take it slow. xiao is new to all of this, and most of the time won’t understand the gestures of affection you provide to him. but later into the relationship, he realizes his love language is indeed physical touch, both receiving and giving. he secretly loves it when you cup his face with both of your hands. it makes him feel relaxed. for giving, he likes holding your hands or giving you head pats.

• there’s a certain fondness that forms when he holds hands with you. it’s warm, a feeling that xiao isn’t used to, because all he has felt is the cold. if you don’t touch him for a while, he gets upset, but more so confused. why did you stop? did you not like it, or are you scared to touch him. surprisingly, he would approach you about it. “why are you being distant? did i do something to upset you?” he cares about your feelings, so he asks with caution. when you hear this, your face betrays you as you start to smile widely. now xiao would be both flustered and confused. “hey! why are you smiling that? dumbass, you find this funny, don’t you?” you can’t help but laugh after that. poor boy needs his daily affection and physical touch, don’t forget to give it to him.

• when xiao calls you, he would always call you by his name. he didn’t understand nicknames of affection in a relationship, so one day when you call him with such, he’s confused. “are you calling me? why did you call me like that?” you get flustered and try to brush it off, but he grabs you and you can see the blush dusting his face. “i like that, can you do it more often?” he’s quiet about it, but you never the less agree. he also picks up on it and often calls you by saying ‘love’ or ‘sweetheart.’ of course, these names are reserved for when the two of you are in private.

• dates with xiao would be a rare occurrence. as much as he loves to spend time with you, he has his own duties and he can’t abandon them. this is one thing you have to understand if you were to be in a relationship with xiao. he can’t have you clinging onto him all the time when he has things he needs to fulfil. when you guys do get to spend some time together, it would be exploring out in the wild. i think xiao finds this very comforting. it’s nice to see the world when it’s not in chaos. you both would walk hand in hand, probably picking some qingxins and mist flowers. and i could definitely see you both just watching the sunset from the balcony at wangshu inn. 

• xiao needs to sleep with you every night. he has nightmares quite often, and your presence subdues those nightmares. if you don’t sleep with him for one night or more, his nightmares get worse, sometimes involving you in them. this causes him to become more overprotective. there would be a night where it got so bad that he started crying. it was just a couple of tears, but the sight genuinely broke your heart into pieces. he didn’t know himself as to why he was crying. he should be used to this, and more importantly, he let himself become vulnerable in front of you, xiao had this perception that he wouldn’t allow you to see him like this, but after he said that to you, it’s safe to say that you both had a long talk that night. after this incident, he allows himself to express his feelings more to you.

• overall, your relationship with xiao really changes him. and i mean in a good way. he’s learned to become more expressive with his feelings and he’s found love. even way later into your relationship, it still baffles him how he found someone like you. on your end, you’ve learned to be more calm and understanding. it would be amazing to be able to experience a relationship like this with xiao. he’s more than happy to stay with you for the rest of your life.

• a relationship with diluc would seem impossible at first. he’s always so busy with work, and he seems to ignore basically everyone. diluc thinks that social interaction is a waste of time. people don’t understand him, and it would be a waste to try and explain why he is the way he is. not that he really needs to though. the only way i could see a relationship happening between you two is if he sees you fighting or if he saves you during a battle.

• if he sees you fighting, he takes notice of your skills. he’s fascinated to say the least. once you finish off, you see him gazing at you from afar. you get nervous, because diluc is staring at you with such an intimidating stare. in that moment, you don’t realize that it’s his usual face. so you start to walk towards him. he sees and he also gets nervous so he just stands there awkwardly. (he thinks he looks awkward, but really, he’s just crossing his arms.) when you get close to him, he suddenly mutters out, “um, your fighting skills are good.” you just stop dead in your tracks and start blushing because you didn’t expect him to compliment you. so you just a utter a small thanks and dash away from him. he thinks that he scared you off, so he gets angry with himself.

• if he saves you during a battle, i can see it being very romantic. it’s a big battle, and the enemies just keep coming, your body is starting to give up on you, and you have dozens of scratches on you. since your so tired, you lose track of your surroundings and get a deep gash somewhere on your body and you fall limp. diluc is just ‘passing by’ and he senses the hillchurls and mages so he runs in your direction. when diluc sees you all helpless, struggling to fight off the mages, he’s filled with a strong fighting urge. he takes out his claymore and finishes off the rest of the enemies for you. you find yourself leaning against a tree in order to get a grip, but diluc just carries you all the way back to monstadt. like casually. you pass out midway through the trip and you wake up feeling all warm and in a nicely lit room. but as you try to get up, you’re pushed back down by someone. you look to your side to see diluc sitting in a chair. mans been taking care of you the whole time you were unconscious.

• when he realizes he has developed feelings for you, he tries to push them away. he tries to convince himself that he doesn’t want it, that it will be a waste of time. really, he’s just trying to list out all the bad things. but as it keeps piling up, soon it’s starts to spills. and all of his feelings and emotions spill fast. he tells you quite early on that he likes you, but you happily accept and reciprocate his love. from then on, diluc completely changed his demeanor around you.

• nicknames with diluc would be also be reserved for when you two are behind closed doors. he wouldn’t want someone like kaeya hearing him say such things. he’s not embarrassed about your relationship, but he hates how kaeya or anyone else will keep nagging at him for it. but he calls you so gently with the sweetest names. i personally think he would use ‘darling’, ‘sweetheart’, ‘my love’, or ‘my little dove.’ i think diluc would appreciate small compliments like calling him handsome or something of that sort. he gets very flustered when you call him by an endearing nickname. not to say he hates it though.

• diluc loves kissing you. of course, he wouldn’t allow himself to do so in public, but when the two of you are alone, he gives your forehead kisses and kisses on the cheek because he can’t help but find you so adorable. he gives short kisses to your fingers because he finds them so soft. compared to his rough hands from handling a claymore, he loves the feeling of your hands. vice versa, you love how warm diluc’s hands are. this is expected, handling a pyro vision, diluc always keeps you warm, especially when the two of you explore dragonspine together. he secretly adores it when you come to him when you feel cold, and he’s more than happy to warm you up.

• diluc is an amazing chef, and no, i do not take criticism on this. i believe that diluc would have picked up his culinary skills from his father when he was younger. and even now, working in the wine industry, he had decided to keep learning. so diluc would always cook you meals, whether it be after a long night of expeditions or early in the morning. it’s quite the sight to see, when you go downstairs into the kitchen to see him making lots of delicious dishes.

• since diluc is so busy, dates would most likely never happen. even if he is free, he doesn’t see the point in going out. so instead, dates would be at home. it would include snuggling together on the couch watching movies, or making things together, and this could be anything you want it to be. on very rare occasions, and i mean very rare, diluc tells you to get dressed up because he’s taking you out for dinner. in all honesty, he probably feels a little bad that he doesn’t take you anywhere, so he tries to compromise. 

• diluc loves it when you lay your head in his lap and vice versa. he enjoys combing through your hair with his fingers, no matter the length. he also like doing your hair, whether it be braiding it or adding any accessory into it, including flowers!! you guys would definitely make flower crowns for each other. he diluc likes it when you play with his hair because it makes him feel warm and comforted. he sometimes just takes your hand and puts it against his hair because he wants you to run your fingers through it. you can’t help but slightly giggle when he does so.

• diluc can be very overprotective and controlling. he doesn’t want to cage you or restrict your freedom, truly. but he is quite terrified of what could happen to you out there. he has already suffered the consequences of this cruel world, right in front of his own eyes. he doesn’t want to lose someone who means so much to him, not again. this would be the main reason you two argue, but you both understand each other’s point of view so you make a compromise.

• all in all, diluc is so in love with you and it’s an amazing experience. you both take comfort in each other’s presence and it really shows diluc that it’s okay to not be so vigilant and distant. he melts around you, so please, just give him the love he has long been yearning, and you will find yourself in many interesting and surprising situations.

• beginning a relationship with kaeya would be so unexpected. he’s not looking for love, he’s merely there just to live his life. i believe that kaeya thinks that love is not meant for him. kaeya is the type to self sabotage his own relationship, intentionally. he doesn’t mean to hurt the other person, but he doesn’t want them to love him, so he makes them hate him. he’s fine with it, simply because he’s not up for that. when you come into the picture, he goes through a rollercoaster of emotions, and he does try to fight it off. but of course, everything does come crumbling down eventually.

• how do you and kaeya meet? it’s a meeting at the tavern, one kaeya somehow remembers well, despite being drunk. you’re just sitting there, but he’s across the room, sitting there and thinking how you are indeed the prettiest thing he has laid his eyes on. does that make him go over there and start flirting with you? absolutely not. he knows all too well about how it’s gonna play out. so he keeps drinking. you however, take notice of the drunken man. his gaze is not at all subtle, so you decided to make the first move. 

• he’s taken aback to say the last. he didn’t expect one to just casually walk up to someone who’s in the knight’s of favonius. you ask him what he’s doing getting all wasted when he clearly has work to do, but he merely responds with; “none of your business.” kaeya doesn’t mean to be so rash, but he knows the outcome. you persist however, and that’s what catches him. he finds himself indulging in the conversation, and it doesn’t matter how much he wants to resist doing it, he can’t help but learn more and more about you. 

• he plays hard to get. you would think it would be kaeya who goes after his partner, but it is quite indeed the opposite. you don’t mind the challenge though, in fact, it makes you want him all together even more. he eventually grows more and more fond of you, and he confesses behind the closed doors of his office. it’s a rare sight, kaeya blushing profusely as he pours out his feelings. of course, you happily accept, and from then on things change for the better.

• ah, a relationship with kaeya. where do we begin? since you two met at a tavern, it’s only fitting if you two go to said tavern together. it depends on you, if you’re a heavy drinker like him, he would gladly enjoy the two of you getting wasted together. if you aren’t the type to drink, he really pays no mind. he still takes you out with him anyways. one could call it a date of sorts. he would also offer that you could come along with him on expeditions, missions, or other affairs. this however, is only if you bear a vision.

• this brings me to my next point, and it is that kaeya, just like his brother, is very protective of you. it shows in the way he always brings you along with him, wherever he goes. he’s already lose his family, and even though diluc is still there, their bond is distant. he already let his walls down around you, so another person who he cares for deeply leaving him might just absolutely shatter him in the worst way possible. of course, he doesn’t wanna cage you freedom, that is never his intention. but sometimes he can’t help but lash out at you. and at those times, it can get pretty serious. he always sincerely apologizes for his actions.

• kaeya is such a flirt, and it’s canon. the spark in your relationship would never fade because this cheeky man is always spewing compliments at you, one after another. he enjoys it so much, it’s written all over his face. and he especially does it in public. a man is trying to flirt with you? well kaeya is there to steal the show. all you can do is giggle and play along because it’s just so fun. he loves to see your face light up in happiness which is why he keeps doing it. 

• it’s no hidden fact that kaeya is a captain for the knight’s of favonius. if you see where i’m going with this, kaeya is a busy man. and he hates it. trust me, he much rather be getting drunk in diluc’s tavern or doing absolutely anything instead of working. but he has to do his job, so he’s gone more often then you would think. of course, he much rather be with the love of his life, but duties still call his name. he tries to make your time together very memorable, whether it be doing something crazy or something small. kaeya’s actions speak a lot to you and he always tries to finish whatever he has on his list as fast as possible just to be able to see you again. <3

• this man loves learning about you. the more you tell him, the more fascinated he is. kaeya finds everything about you, your past, your personality, everything so intriguing. he could just sit there and watch you talk for hours because you just look so adorable talking about yourself. if you see yourself rambling a lot, you might apologize for talking so much, but what does kaeya do? this man will just kiss you and tell you: “keep going darling.” even if you try to keep talking, you just keep getting flustered, stumbling over your words and kaeya just starts to laugh at you being an adorable mess. and then he’ll kiss you some more. wholesome moments. <3

• he loves seeing you in his clothes!! definitely the type to purposely leave his clothes out just so you can steal them. he’ll sometimes let you take his jacket, just to see how good you’ll look wearing it. if you don’t get the hint, he’ll straight up tell you to get your ass in his shirts. you shouldn’t even complain. kaeya has an amazing scent to him, so just relax and drown in it. if you could design clothes he would love to wear some pieces you could make! he’s so in love with you please send some help.

• all in all, kaeya would die for you. he loves you so much and he always remind you of it in his own special ways. he never thought it was possible to love someone this much, but here you are. be patient with him, love with him, do everything with him, it’s amazing to see what you two can do together. 

• zhongli would be the best partner. he has experience, and he takes the relationship slow. this is because he wants to learn about you. he wants to take the time and see what your likes and dislikes are. zhongli is so genuinely in love with you. you get flustered when he asks sometimes but he just doesn’t understand why you feel that way. “i just want to get to know you better, my dear.”

• zhongli would take notice of you strolling around the harbor. he has a lot of free time of his hands, and it doesn’t take him long to notice how you sit nearby the flowers or helping the people around you. he would invite you for a small chat with tea, and you would simply melt at his gentleness. these occasional gatherings would become more frequent, and he would become closer to you, eventually developing feelings for you. you couldn’t help but share them back.

• zhongli addresses you so endearingly it makes me burst into tears. he would definitely call you ‘my dear/dearest’, ‘my love’, or ‘darling’. it’s always said in a gentle voice, that you have to turn your head towards him. he doesn’t mind calling you affectionately in public, but he does ask for your permission. if you agree, he says in a quiet voice in public, usually when he’s worried about losing you in the crowd. if you aren’t quite familiar with such names, he would reserve them for when the two of you are with close acquaintances.

• zhongli loves holding hands with you. chances are, his hands are quite larger in comparison to yours. (even if your hands are bigger, he loves them the same.) he loves feeling the warmth of intertwined hands. he’ll hold your hand everywhere, it’s kind of how he shows his protectiveness over you. also expect a lot of headpats. it’s a habit he’s developed from dealing with people younger then him. (ahem.. hu tao..) 

• further into your relationship, zhongli would come clean about being the geo archon. he trusts you, and he doesn’t want to hide anything from you, otherwise it slowly eats at him until he finally gives up and confesses. the way you take this information can have an effect on your relationship. he trusts you, but if you betray that trust, and start to reveal his secret, he will have no choice but to ‘take care of you.’ 

• dates with zhongli are very.. informative. the guy will keep talking about anything honestly. it’s an old habit, but you don’t mind. it’s relaxing to hear him ramble about such topics. he notices that when he gets carried away in his story, you’re sitting there staring at him with a soft smile. he gets nervous, but that doesn’t mean he loses him composure. expect for the two of you to stroll around liyue harbor or the guili plains. the date will mostly just consist of grasping the scenery of liyue or maybe eating out in a restaurant. it will most likely be in a private setting, since he is so well known in the harbor, he doesn’t want anyone interrupting while he’s with his partner. 

• but more than anything, zhongli loves staying at home. like diluc, he will show his affectionate manners in the comfort of your house. it’s adorable, really. the saying “actions speak louder than words” really sticks by zhongli. he’ll show his love for you in many ways, no matter if it’s cooking a meal for you, helping you with chores, or just sitting together in each other’s presence. you both discover new things together, and it really does warm zhongli’s heart. 

• he never wants to see you upset. no lover would want this, but it hits zhongli in a different way. if he sees even a little tear forming, he gets very worried. zhongli always wants you to be happy, as cheesy as it sounds. if you are quite sensitive or cry quite a bit, it’s no need to worry. zhongli will always be there to wipe your tears away and comfort you. i can imagine during night if you were to breakdown and cry, he would just take you in his arms and cradle you, telling you that you’re so strong fot pushing on: “you’re okay my love, shh i’m here for you. i’m always gonna be here.” i’m crying oh god. never be afraid to let your emotions show around him, he’s always gonna be there.

• zhongli carries a lot of burdens. being the oldest out of the archons, he has quite legitimately seen everything. it’s painful to live with the thought of having slaughtered thousands, maybe millions of people. being with you subdues that burn by a good amount. if anything, he learns to be forgiving from you. not only to other people, but also to himself. he’s also learned to not be so uptight with everything, since it’s quite hard for him to let his guard down around people. 

• truthfully, zhongli would have never thought it was possible for him to love someone as much as he loves you. even if he knows you will soon leave him, it’s overshadowed by the love he holds for you. zhongli is a very intimate lover once you get to know him, so during your relationship things are always lively.

[farfromtommy]

All I Need Is You

not my gif

PLEASE READ WARNINGS AND AUTHORS NOTE

THIS PIECE CONTAINS POSSIBLE TRIGGERING CONTENT FOR READERS

word count: approx. 6800

warnings: TW: talk of miscarriage there is talk of blood if is an uncomfortable topic for you please please do not read. it is not graphic and not in extreme detail but it is there, angst, language, talk of sex and unprotected sex (no smut but it gets a lil spicy), childbirth and breastfeeding, fluffly fluff throughout 

summary: tom wants kids, y/n doesn’t, but that’s okay. but after the birth of their godson and after meeting y/n’s best friend’s new baby, something changed.

a/n: this story does contain mild descriptions of blood and miscarriage, but is not the main plot to the story. i have never gone through one personally, but i did research and used some prior knowledge while writing this. please know that i mean absolutely no disrespect to anyone who has had a miscarriage or been affected in any way. if this story offends anyone in anyway, please let me know and i will take it down. this is all a work of fiction. this does contain possible triggering content and i will be putting a warning during the part and after. i will be linking some resources available for anyone who has had a miscarriage or is being affected by one in anyway. you are not alone. 

The topic of kids and when you were going to have them was not unfamiliar to you and Tom. You had been together since you were both 18 and now engaged at 23. You and Tom have been giving people the same answers whenever they asked when you were having kids for years. “We’re not ready to have kids yet” or “It’s not a priority for us at the moment”

You knew Tom had had an itch of baby fever for a while and he had expressed his desire to become a father in the future, but only when you’re ready to become a mother, but you weren’t sure if you were ever going to be.

About 6 months after your engagement, his parents had managed to get everyone under the same roof at the same time for dinner and had bombarded you with comments and questions about when they were to expect a grandbaby. They had been hearing your reasons for not having had kids yet for years and weren’t accepting those answers anymore. Tom told them that you were both focusing on planning the wedding and would visit the topic after if the timing was right.

The timing would never be right, Tom felt. He had asked you a few times about the possibility of having a baby in the future and he only ever managed to get short answers out of you and then the topic was dismissed. Harry and Sam asked him about it privately and Tom expressed his concerns to them about your seeming lack of interest in even having a conversation about it. They encouraged him to sit you down and talk it out like adults. With the wedding planning starting to pick up, he knew this conversation had to happen to make sure you were both on the same page.

~~~

After his conversation with his brothers, Tom had finally worked up the courage to approach you about the baby talk and was going to put his foot down and not let you dismiss it.

“Darling, can we talk about something?” Tom asked one night as you were pulling back the sheets to get into bed. You had crawled onto your side of the bed and set your phone on the nightstand to give him your undivided attention.

“Yeah, baby, of course. What’s on your mind?” You said softly, leaning back against the headboard. Tom sat across from you on the foot of the bed with his legs crossed, leaning back on his hands. He took a deep breath and collected his thoughts before speaking.

“We have talked briefly about this a few times before, but we’ve never sat down and talked about it, and I think it's past time we did. Do you want kids?” He asked bluntly and looked you in the eyes. He saw your demeanor change just slightly when your eyes widened a bit. You looked down at your hands and wrung them nervously trying to find your words.

“I know I keep avoiding the topic, and I’m sorry. But if I’m being honest, I don’t think so. I’ve never been able to see myself as a mother and having a big family and all that. I thought that maybe when we got engaged and bought this house that I would change my mind and feel different, but I don’t.” You whispered the last part and kept your eyes on your hands.

“I’m so so sorry, Tom. I know that you want a family and kids but I don’t know if I can do it. Everything about pregnancy and becoming a mother scares the ever-loving shit out of me and I send myself into a panic attack at the thought. That’s why I’m so dismissive about it. I’m sorry. If you want to leave, I understand.” You let the tears fall down your face, trying to keep your voice even.

You felt the bed shift a little and you shut your eyes to keep the tears back, assuming Tom was getting up to leave. You flinched when you felt his hand on your face and his lips on the top of your head. You felt him press his body against your side and you leaned against him and let a few tears fall.

“Y/N, darling, listen to me. It’s okay, my love. I’m not mad or upset with you at all, and I’m not going to leave you. You don’t have to change your mind or feel differently about kids if that’s how you feel. I didn’t propose to you just so we could have babies, I’m marrying you to spend the rest of my life with you. I'm okay with it just being us. I just want to spend every day of my life loving you, that’s enough for me. I don’t need anything or anyone else to make me happy. All I need is you.” Tom said to you. He rubbed your back soothingly trying to calm the quiet sobs that were escaping your mouth.

“I don’t want you to hate me in 50 years and look back at all the things I couldn’t give you, or regret not marrying someone who would’ve given you kids.” You whispered into his chest.

“I’m never going to regret marrying you, I promise you that. In 50 years we’ll look back at the most amazing life we had together and cherish all the memories we made, not look back and think of what could’ve been.” He cupped your cheeks in his hand and wiped the thick tears falling down your face.

He was able to get you to calm down after a few minutes and crawled under the sheets with you. He laid down on his back and pulled you close to him with your head on his chest and one arm wrapped around your shoulders and the other rubbing your arm.

“I love you so much, Tommy. I don’t know what I did in this life to deserve you.” You mumbled against the skin of his bare chest. He kissed the top of your head again and let his cheek rest against it as he whispered ‘I love you so much more’ and pulled you closer.

~~~

Tom managed to get everyone to cool it with the baby talk. You didn’t know what he said to his parents to get them to chill out a bit, but whatever he said worked. With the weight lifted off of both your shoulders, the wedding was the only thing on your mind.

It couldn’t have gone more perfectly. The day you and Tom had been planning for almost a year and the day you had been waiting for, honestly, since the day you met him. He looked incredible in his crisp black tux with his brothers and best friend standing right next to him.

The ceremony had everyone, including you and Tom, in tears. From the words the officiant spoke to the vows that were exchanged and then the moment you were pronounced man and wife, there was not one dry eye. After all the emotions you felt after the ceremony, you were beyond excited to celebrate with friends and family at the reception.

You sat at the table reserved for you and Tom and all of the bridesmaids and groomsmen just watching the joy bubble out of everyone in front of you. Tom was standing on the edge of the dance floor with a beer in his hand talking to a few of the people he had worked with over the years and that he hadn’t had a chance to catch up with. You were nursing a glass of champagne while you talked to one of your bridesmaids about the honeymoon you were leaving for in a few days.

One of Tom’s cousins had approached you and sat in a chair next to you to share her excitement with you over the whole day. Her husband had approached her with their 7-month-old son, Lucas, saying that he was getting a bit fussy. She gladly took her son and rested him in her lap, letting him play with the jewelry on her wrists and fingers.

Lucas had started to get a bit antsy again and Tom’s cousin had started to get up in search of her husband to try and get a bottle for the little boy. You had offered to hold him while she looked for him and try to keep him happy and occupied in the meantime. She graciously passed him over to you and you assured her that it was no problem.

He was a little distressed at the sight of his mother walking away, so you stood up and held him close to you as you walked around and talked to him a bit. He distracted himself with the necklace resting on your neck and wrapped his tiny fingers around it and stuck it in his mouth. You laughed to yourself at the boy and kept whispering things to him. One of your friends had approached you and pointed out how content Lucas seemed in your arms. She stood there with you making noises and faces at the boy to make him laugh and he responded to it with a gummy smile and buried his face in your chest.

Tom had been wrapped up in a conversation with his friends and hadn’t noticed you standing with the baby in your arms. Nikki walked up behind him and rested her hand on Tom’s shoulder, grabbing his attention. Tom quickly excused himself from his friends and let his mom pull him away. She turned him so he was facing you and got close and pointed to you standing with his cousin, with the laughing baby in your arms.

“She’s really good with him. I don’t think that little boy has ever been that happy in the arms of anyone besides his mother. Look at the smiles on both of their faces.” Nikki said fondly, watching you interact with the baby. Tom mumbled a quiet ‘Yeah, she is’ and kept his eyes glued on you. Your smile and laugh were infectious and he found himself mirroring the joy you had plastered on your face.

“I didn’t want kids when your dad and I first met. It wasn’t until right before we got married that I had told him that I wanted to have a family with him. Let her bring it up to you and if she decides it's something she wants, she’ll let you know.” She looked over at Tom to see him looking at you like you hung the moon and stars.

Tom quickly set his beer down and made his way over to you. He greeted his cousin and hugged her before taking his spot next to you. His hand went to your lower back while he gave the other to Lucas. Tom wiggled his fingers which elicited a laugh from the baby, making you smile and laugh. He stood there for a few minutes chatting with his cousin and her husband about the baby and how he was taken with you.

Lucas ended up falling asleep in your arms with his head resting in the crook of your neck and his fingers wrapped around your necklace. You were sad to let go of Lucas but admired the way the corner of his mouth twitched into a smile when you passed him over to his father. You bid your goodbyes to the baby and his parents and grabbed Tom’s hand to pull him into a kiss.

~~~

After a year or so of being married, Tom had started to notice something different about you. He had picked up on the way you walked a little slower past the baby section whenever you went to the store together and always pointed out what you thought was exceptionally adorable. He noticed the way you looked longingly at the toddlers running around the park when you would take Tessa on walks together. When your best friend from university had brought her newborn daughter around to your place was when everything had finally started to click, for both of you.

The words Nikki had said to him at the wedding echoed in his mind. He needed to let you come to him about it. The last thing he wanted was to pressure you into talking about something you weren’t ready for.

“I’m so happy for Megan. She’s been dreaming about having a daughter, I swear since I met her. She was always talking about how badly she wanted to be a mom and couldn’t wait to have kids.” You said to Tom once you had both crawled into bed. He rested against the headboard with his laptop resting on his thighs. He looked over at you when you pulled back the comforter and got into bed next to him.

“She seems happy. Even when she was talking about not having gotten a wink of sleep in the past 3 weeks, she said it with a smile and love.” Tom chuckled to himself, turning his attention back to what he was working on. You hummed in agreement and grabbed the book off your nightstand. You found yourself unable to focus on the words in front of you and kept rereading the same few words over and over again.

Your mind kept going back to the afternoon you spent with Megan and her daughter and how happy you were to see your friend so happy. You’d be lying if you said you hadn’t been imagining you and Tom with that sort of happiness. The past year has been the best in your life. Tom had been traveling so much for work and you went with him wherever he went. Traveling the world and seeing your husband live his dream made you happy beyond belief. But you still felt like there was something more that you longed for.

“Oh, I don’t think I told you. My cousin sent me a message earlier today, she’s pregnant again! I think she said she’s about 20 weeks and having a gender reveal next week, and wants us to be there. I told her I’d talk to you about it.” Tom said while he opened up his messages and let you read the texts for yourself.

“Wow! That’s so amazing. Lucas is gonna be a great big brother. I don’t think we have anything going on, we should definitely go.” You handed Tom’s phone back to him and pulled yours out to send her a message.

A twinge of jealousy panged in your gut. Why did you feel like this? You had never felt jealous of your friends and family when they had gotten pregnant before. It was only good news whenever you found out. Did you wish it was you? Maybe this was your heart telling you that this was something you wanted. Maybe-

“Darling? You okay?” Tom’s voice pulled you out of your thoughts and your eyes focused on your phone in your hand. You looked over at Tom and saw the concern in his eyes.

“Yeah, yeah. I got lost in thought for a second, I guess.” You brushed it off and kept typing the message. 

~~~

You stared at the positive pregnancy tests with a mix of emotions. One part of you was freaking out at the thought of being pregnant. All the fears you had about pregnancy and motherhood rearing their ugly heads right at the front of your mind. It wasn’t just an ‘IF I got pregnant’ fear, it was an ‘oh my god I’m pregnant and it’s going to happen’ fear. It wasn’t just imagining what would happen anymore, it was actually happening.

The other part of you felt an indescribable amount of joy and excitement. Your mind immediately went to Tom and how over the moon he would be at the news. Imagining what a perfect father he would be to your baby had your heart bursting and your whole body buzzing. He’s the most perfect person to raise a child with.

The fears of parenthood and of becoming a mother tried to cloud your mind again, but you were too excited about telling Tom to care. A few minutes later you walked into the living room with the tests in your hand, looking for Tom. You heard him in the kitchen fixing up some lunch and singing along to the music coming out of his phone.

“Darling what do you want on your sandwich? I’ve got the things you usually take, you just want everything?” Tom said when he heard your footsteps from down the hall get closer to where he was.

“Yeah, everything is good. Um, I need to tell you something though, before we eat.” Tom’s head looked up at you, his eyes filled with worry and a bit of curiosity. He set down the knife he had in his hand and leaned against the counter, waiting for you to talk.

“Uh so. The past couple of weeks or so I’ve been feeling super off and just really not like myself. I think I mentioned to you that I was feeling weird and we chalked it off as maybe I was getting sick or my period was just gonna hit like a bitch this month.” You looked down at the stick in your hand and looked back up at Tom, his eyes not having left your face. “I- I, uh, I went to log my symptoms into my period tracking app and when I did, it said that my period was almost a week late and that even though there were a bunch of possible causes… the one that stood out was pregnancy.” You looked back up at Tom and his eyebrows were furrowed and you could see the worry lines across his forehead.

“Y/N?” He whispered as he stepped closer to you and placed a hand on your hip, quietly urging you to continue. You took a deep breath and opened up your hand to show him the white and blue stick resting in your palm.

“I’m pregnant, Tommy. I got a couple of tests this morning while you were at the gym and I just took them. They’re all positive.” He carefully picked up the plastic stick like it was made of glass and looked at the little screen with the words ‘pregnant’ across it. You felt the emotion well up in your chest when he brought his hand up to his mouth and heard him choke back a breath.

“Oh my god. You’re not messing with me, right? This is for real?” He looked up at you with tears pooling in his lower lash line. All you could do was muster up a nod before the tears fell from both of your eyes.

Tom wrapped his arms around you and lifted you slightly off the ground, twirling you around the kitchen while he laughed and cried in joy. You giggled at his actions and kept your arms wrapped around his neck, the tears still falling from your eyes. He set you down after a few moments passed and cupped your face in his hands. He saw the emotions written all across your face, all he could see was happiness and excitement.

“This is a good thing, right?” he wiped a few stray tears off of your cheeks with his thumbs and tilted his head a little bit.

“Yeah, this is a really good thing. I know my feelings were different before but I don’t know, I guess something changed.” You smiled a bit thinking back on the last couple of months of feeling like this.

It had started with your friend from college introducing you to her daughter and asking you and Tom to babysit when she needed one. When Tom’s cousin had their 2nd son, they had asked you and Tom to be the godparents to baby James. You and Tom were over the moon excited to accept and to be there for the christening of your godson.

Tom couldn’t find the words to say and just pulled you in for another bone-breaking hug. You stood in the kitchen with him, your lunch long forgotten, just hugging each other. You could feel the love pour out from your bodies and to each other, everything was as perfect as it could be.

You set up an appointment with your gynecologist as soon as you could, anxious to confirm your pregnancy with them and maybe be able to see the beginning stages of your little one growing in your tummy. Tom had insisted he take a day off of work to go with you. He had declared that he was not going to let work or anything get in the way of him supporting you through this.

He had heard so many stories from people he’s worked with about them missing the birth of their children because of work and strict filming schedules. Or that their spouse has been left at home the entire pregnancy, sometimes with other children too, and they were only able to get a week off for the birth and then head back to work.

Tom swore to you before you got married that he would never prioritize work over his life with you. He had never missed spending a birthday, an anniversary, or a holiday with you. He sure as hell wasn’t about to miss witnessing the miracle of your pregnancy.

The appointment went as perfectly and smoothly as it could’ve gone. You were still in the very early stages of your first trimester, only about 7 weeks pregnant. Your doctor had said that it was possible to hear the heartbeat already and spent a little time searching for it. 

After a few seconds had passed a whooshing sound had filled the room and the doctor smiled at you when your eyes shot over to Tom. He had wrapped one of your hands in both of his and kissed your knuckles, letting tears slip out at the sound of his baby’s heartbeat. 

There wasn’t much to see on the sonogram. Your doctor had pointed out the grainy blob on the picture that was indeed your baby. You couldn’t stop staring at the little grey blob that was changing your life.

“So I think we should hold off on telling everyone until I’m a little farther along, you know, just in case. The nurse said miscarriages are common during the first trimester and we gotta be really careful. I’m okay with telling your mom, I think it’ll be good to have her support and be able to ask her things. But we should hold off on a big announcement until I’m at least 16 weeks.” You said in the car on your way back home after the appointment.

“Yeah of course. Dad is taking me and the boys golfing next week, so mum will probably ask you to lunch or something. You can tell her then or we can do it together another day, whatever you prefer. You’re the boss, mummy. Whatever you say, goes.” He quickly glanced over at you with a big smile on his face before putting his eyes back on the road. 

Your face split into a huge grin at the name before placing your hands on your stomach. Tom rested one of his hands on top of yours and kept it there the whole way home.

~~~

*SENSITIVE CONTENT AHEAD*

No one could have warned you about the overwhelming heartache you could feel during pregnancy. You thought it would be smooth sailing into your second trimester and you’d finally be able to share with everyone the joy of a new baby coming into the world.

Your doctor had made you aware of the possibility of having a miscarriage at the beginning of your pregnancy, not to scare you, but just so you were aware. 10-15% of all pregnancies resulted in miscarriages, 80% of them happening in the first trimester due to a multitude of reasons. She said to take care of yourself and to do everything in your power to keep yourself and your baby as healthy as could be.

You had done everything by the books.

You ate a well-balanced diet, cutting out everything your doctor had advised you to avoid. You had started joining Tom at the gym more regularly and did a bit of yoga at home, just to keep yourself in shape, but never overexerting yourself. Cutting out alcohol had been a no brainer, even Tom said he wouldn’t drink if you couldn’t. You, unfortunately, had to cut down majorly on your caffeine intake, which left you irritable and cranky most mornings. But it was all for the wellbeing of your baby, which made it all oh so worth it.

Nikki found out about your pregnancy when she had asked you to lunch while the Holland boys were golfing for the day. You had shown her the sonogram and she gasped in shock at the picture in front of her. Your name was printed across the top of it, so she knew it was yours. She had been sworn to secrecy when you told her that only you, her, and Tom knew and that you were keeping it a secret until about 16 weeks.

She was the first person you called when you were sitting at home by yourself when you had started to feel a cramping sort of pain along your abdomen and stretching into your back. Your doctor had said that cramping was normal but if it was accompanied by period-like bleeding, to call immediately. You stretched out a bit on the couch to try and get the pain to pass but when it didn’t, you picked up the phone and called Nikki.

Her tone of voice stayed calm as you explained what you were feeling and where you were feeling it. She had dropped everything and said she’d be there as soon as she could be and to relax, everything was going to be okay. You had advised against her wish of calling Tom, for the time being, he was in the city for meetings and some press events all day and you didn’t want to bother him if it was nothing.

In no more than 20 minutes you were sitting next to her on the couch as you told her in more detail about the discomfort along your abdomen. She had suggested you get up and go to the bathroom just to be sure there wasn’t any bleeding. You gave her a nervous glance and she assured you it was going to be okay, she just wanted to be sure.

Standing up from the couch the pain had started to shift into your pelvis and deepen in your abdomen. You had asked for her to help you to the bathroom and to stay with you, just in case. She said ‘of course’ and led you to the nearest toilet to the living room. You could feel your heartbeat in your ears as you neared the bathroom, praying that this was nothing and just one of those pregnancy things.

Nikki had respectfully turned around after you unbuttoned your jeans and started to sit. You pulled your underwear down with your pants and took a deep breath before glancing down and seeing the mess on the inside of your underwear. Your heart dropped down to your gut seeing the bright red blood staining the fabric and sticking to the inside of your thighs. A quiet ‘oh no’ left your mouth as you just stared down. Nikki turned around hearing you talk and saw what was happening. She mumbled something you couldn’t hear before she opened the door and headed towards your room.

You could hear the opening and shutting of drawers in the distance and the shuffling of her feet back into the bathroom. She set a pair of fresh underwear and a pair of sweatpants on the counter next to you before opening the cabinets under the sink in search of a pad. She placed everything next to you and asked you to change so she could drive you to the hospital. You nodded slowly and she left the bathroom quietly.

~~~

The next couple of months were difficult, but having the support of Tom made it just a little bit easier. He held you when all you could do was cry and told you that it was going to be okay. He was going to be there every step of the way. He rubbed your back and held you close anytime you needed it and gave you your space when you asked for it.

He made sure to listen to you deeply when you talked about it. He assured you, along with your doctor, that it wasn’t your fault. There was nothing you could’ve done differently to stop this. It was just a freak thing and is unfortunately a common occurrence. He let you air out your frustrations and fears openly and told you that you weren’t alone. He shared some of the same fears that you did and helped you feel not crazy about having these big feelings.

You helped each other begin the process of healing and coming to terms with what had happened. It took time for you both to talk about it without being overwhelmed with grief and sadness, but it happened. You were able to share what had happened with close friends and family and feel okay about sharing your story. The amount of support and love you got from everyone made it that much easier to take another step forward in healing.

You learned that some of the people closest to you had gone through the same pain in the past, but had never shared it. You felt comfort in knowing that you weren’t alone and that your doctor wasn’t saying that miscarriages were common just to make you feel better. People you knew and had deep relationships with had gone through the same thing, it wasn’t just you and Tom. You weren’t alone in your suffering and pain. It was okay to feel sad about the loss of someone you hadn’t met or that wasn’t really a someone yet. It’s okay to grieve and feel the feelings you have about the loss.

Tom and Nikki had had another conversation about you approaching him about having a baby, much like they did on the night of your wedding. It had been almost a year since the miscarriage, and he wanted to know where you stood on having a baby again. He didn’t want to rush or push you at all. Nikki assured him that when you were ready, you would let him know.

You had started to do the slow walk past the baby section in the store again. After the miscarriage, you had avoided it as much as possible. You pointed out cute onesies and toys any time you saw them. The sadness in the longing looks you had at the sight of toddlers in the parks had changed to happiness and joy.

You told him you didn’t want to have sex after you miscarried, and he completely understood. There was no resentment towards you when you would stop a makeout session when it got too heated and he would get up and take care of himself in the bathroom or take a cold shower. About 6 months after, you insisted that he wear a condom and pulled out before he came, even with the condom on. Just to be safe.

Your sex life with Tom had started to spark again and was getting back to how it was before the miscarriage. You were okay if he came inside you, but still with the condom on. That's how it had been until one night you and Tom were enjoying a date night at home together, and both had a little too much wine. You were about a bottle and a half into your favorite red wine, both of you way well on your way to being wine drunk.

Date night had moved from the dining room to the couch after the 2nd bottle of wine was finished. Tom was sitting with his back against the armrest, one leg stretched out in front of him with the other planted on the floor. Your knees were digging into the cushion beneath them on either side of Tom’s leg. His fingers dug into the flesh of your hips, pulling you impossibly close to his body. His lips attacked yours with pure lust and passion. He pulled back hesitantly before attacking your neck with his mouth, nipping and biting before soothing the abused skin with his tongue.

“Tom, wait.” You breathed out, placing your hands against his chest to push him back. He looked up at you with concern and kiss swollen lips.

“What’s wrong? Did I hurt you?” He asked quickly, his eyes scanning your face to make sure you were okay. You pulled back a little to put a little space between you and Tom. You shut your eyes and took a deep breath before talking. 

“No, you didn’t. I just- hold on. I’ve uh, I’ve been thinking a lot the past few week about maybe us trying for another baby.” You managed to get out. The alcohol was making everything a bit fuzzy but gave you the ability to speak your mind.

“Yeah? You’re ready for that?” Tom’s eyes softened as he pushed some of your hair out of your face and rested one of his hands against the side of your neck

“It’s been almost a year, you know? I talked to my gyno at my appointment last week and she said that there’s no reason we can’t try again. It was a freak thing, and there was nothing we could’ve done differently to change what happened. I’m ready if you’re ready. I want to start a family with you, so bad.” Tom couldn’t find the words to respond to your declaration. All he did was smile so hard his cheeks hurt and pull you close to him again.

~~~

“Push Y/N! Just a few more big pushes and your baby will be here.” Your doctor said from the end of the hospital bed you were in. All you could feel was the pain ripping through your whole body because of the human trying to make their way into the world.

You could feel the cold towel pressed against the back of your neck and the tickle of air flowing into your nose. There was a nurse on one side of you pulling one of your legs back and Tom on the other side pulling the other. He had his other hand on top of your head pushing back the strands of hair getting stuck on the sweat of your forehead.

“You’re so close, lovey. I’m so fucking proud of you baby. You’ve got this. You’re so close.” Tom chanted into your ear while pressing small kisses to your temple. All you did was grit your teeth and push as hard as you could.

There was a sudden release of relief from your body, and you felt like the wind was knocked out of your whole body. You collapsed on the pillow behind you and managed to pry your eyes open. In front of you was a baby covered in bodily fluids and screaming their absolute heart out. Your hospital gown was slipped open as the nurses helped situate the baby onto your bare chest. The hands you had gripping the sheets below you flew to the baby’s back and you choked out a sob of relief.

“You did it Y/N, you fucking did it. Oh my god, she’s so perfect, you’re so perfect.” Tom managed to get out before breaking down into tears. He placed a hand on top of the baby’s head, not caring about the mess. You looked over at him and he pressed a kiss right on your lips and rested his forehead against yours before you both looked at the baby on your chest.

The doctor had asked Tom if he wanted to cut the cord and he stumbled over himself to do it. Some of the nurses had cleaned up the baby while she was still resting on your bare skin so you could get a better look at her.

“It’s a girl, Tommy. We have a daughter.” You looked over at Tom. He had pulled his phone out and took the first picture of his wife and daughter together.

“The most perfect girl in the world. Just like her perfect mummy.” Tom said with tears still falling down his face. Your doctor congratulated you and Tom before leaving the room after you were stitched up and okay to get back into a normal position on the bed.

A nurse had taken the baby to the other side of the room to get her cleaned up completely and take her weight and measurements. Tom stood close to make sure his little girl was okay. You watched from your bed with heavy eyes, your whole body begging you to rest after almost 24 hours of labor. After the baby was cleaned up, she had a diaper put on her and wrapped in the regular hospital baby blanket. She was carefully handed to Tom before he made his way back to your bed.

You had gotten as comfortable in the bed as you could and were so grateful for whoever had invented epidurals and pain medication. Tom sat on the edge of the bed and sat shoulder to shoulder with you with a leg resting on the bed and the other keeping him steady on the floor. All he could do was stare at the baby in his arms and think about how surreal this all was.

“Did you send that picture to your parents and the boys?” You whispered so you didn’t disturb her.

“Yeah right after I took it, I haven’t checked to see what they’ve said though. I’m sure they’re going crazy right now.” He chuckled and pressed a kiss to your temple. You leaned into him and shut your eyes for a second to just take in everything that was happening. Your eyes shot open when you heard a knock on the door and Tom said ‘come in’.

“Hi, Mrs. Holland. I’m Olivia, a lactation consultant. One of the delivery nurses said that you were wanting to breastfeed and sent me in here just to help you out since this is going to be the first time you’re breastfeeding. Mind if I interrupt for just a little bit?” A woman not much older than you came in and moved closer to your bed. Olivia washed her hands before pulling a rolling chair next to your bed. Tom stood up to give you and Olivia the space to do what was necessary.

“Yep, just like that Y/N. That’s perfect. Baby girl Holland seems to be a pro at this, too!” Olivia watched as you positioned the baby at the perfect spot and started to nurse. It took a while to get used to the feeling, but once you did it was the most amazing thing. Tom couldn’t take his eyes off of the magic happening in front of him.

~~~

“She needs a name, Tom. We haven’t named her yet.” You whispered to Tom in the middle of the night after feeding the baby again. The nurses had come in a few times to check up on you but for the most part, were leaving you and Tom to your own devices.

“I like the name Emma.” He whispered back from the cot that was a few feet away from you, the baby in between you. You sat up as best as you could to get a look at the sleeping baby.

“She’d make a good Emma. What about Nicole for her middle name? Pay homage to your mom. I don’t know what I would’ve done without her through all of this.” You said quietly. You didn’t hear a response and looked over to see him with a toothy grin spread across his face.

“You would do that?” Tom sat up and looked at you.

“Of course. You know how much I love her, she’s so important to both of us. Plus I think Emma Nicole Holland has a pretty good ring to it.”

-- 

a few resources available 

about miscarriage and more information available

grief resources

list of articles, books, and web-based resources

postpartum support

support organizations

--

[tiffdawg]

I’ll Be Your Princess Too | A Fennec Shand x Reader Story

Gif: @bestintheparsec

Pairing: Fennec Shand x Reader (fem; no y/n)

Word Count: 2.6k

Rated: E  | Warnings: NSFW – explicit sexual content, Fennec gives the strap, cum as lube, squirting, oral sex (f receiving), dirty talk. Open relationships; reader is also involved with Boba Fett. Mild language. 18+ only.

A/N: I promise this isn’t Boba slander, but Fennec does get a couple good hits in. Also, the reader’s relationship with Boba is left undefined but I want to make it clear that she doesn’t cheat on him. They have an understanding of sorts that works for them. The reader is also bi/pan/whatever suits you best! I just know my little bi heart would want both of them.

Read on AO3

My Masterlist

... . ...

I’ll Be Your Princess Too

You tiptoed out of the quarters you shared with Tatooine’s newest king and through the dark halls of the underground complex. Boba was sound asleep after a particularly grueling day. You’d coaxed a few details out of him when he’d first retired for the night, but it was much the same as every other day. While he was a cunning and perceptive leader, he had little patience for the more diplomatic aspects of his position. He’d often remarked to you that some problems were better solved with a blaster. That night you’d suggested he vent with his own frustrations not with words but action. Reclining on his bed, you parted your legs and offered yourself to him. He accepted with a genuine smile.

Judging by the silence that had fallen over the old Hutt castle, that was hours ago.

Slipping into the commissary, you scoured the cabinets for something small to quell your midnight cravings. You selected a dish of muja fruit imported from Naboo. It was something of a delicacy in the Outer Rim. Biting into the ripe flesh, the sweet juices flooded your mouth and you hummed in delight. So lost in the flavor and the solitude offered by the late hour, you startled when the mechanical door behind you suddenly slid open.

Fennec Shand watched you from the threshold. The former mercenary was a woman to be feared across the galaxy and in your months at the palace, you’d quickly learned that nothing slipped past the sharpshooter’s perceptive gaze. What she was looking for in you, you had no idea.

“What are you still doing up, princess?” Chills erupted across your bare skin despite yourself at her subtle mocking. The endearment always felt different when it slipped past her lips. When Boba bestowed it upon you, it settled in your heart. When she said it… well, it struck something deeper. Something you didn’t understand.

“I couldn’t sleep,” you replied quietly. You cursed your voice for failing you. Around Shand, your confidence gave way to an uncertainty and hesitation that was unlike you. When she didn’t give so much as a shifting expression in response, you held out your plate of fruit in silent offering.

Unaffected, she moved deeper into the room to fetch her favorite spotchka, quickly uncorking it and drinking straight from the bottle. If history had any bearing, you figured that was the end of your interaction and you turned your attention back to your fruit. But after she’d taken a long pull, she spoke again.

“Then Fett didn’t fuck you properly.”

You gaped at her. You weren’t surprised at her cutting assessment or cool delivery. What confused you was the hint of a challenge lacing her tone and shining through her dark eyes. A challenge you returned.

“Think you could do better?” you asked, excitement stirring inside you.

Shand didn’t say anything for a drawn-out moment as she eyed you. Before you could even start to worry that you’d misread the situation, the corner of her mouth quirked upward in the smallest hint of a smile.

“Yes.”

… . …

From your position on your back, reclined against the single pillow on her small bunk, you watched Shand’s every move as she strapped on the harness. Wearing only a thin black tunic and a pair of sensible briefs, it was the most you’d ever seen of her and you catalogued every scar that marked her skin. They were signs not of her weakness but of her strength. Of her survival. Your eyes were drawn back to her hands as she turned to you. Anticipation swelled in your belly as she tightened the straps with a little more force than strictly necessary. She was showing off. For you.

Anticipation turned to pure arousal when you saw the size of the dildo she planned to fuck you with. “Oh, gods,” you sighed around a hysterical laugh. With the back of your hand thrown over your eyes, you attempted to compose yourself.

“Is my cock bigger than Fett’s, princess?” she asked. You peaked at her and found a smile fit for a Loth-wolf. The first real smile you’d seen on the woman and it was for you.

“Well,” you started as you searched for a diplomatic answer. You were not really one to talk about your lover’s prowess with others. Compared to her toy, what Boba lacked in length, he more than made up for in girth. “He is rather well-endowed, but I think you will satisfy me in an entirely different way.”

She nodded, apparently pleased with your answer. Kneeling on the bed, she hiked up your white silk shift and pulled your matching panties down your legs, knocking your knees apart in the process.

“You’re still dripping with his cum,” she observed, nonplused. She swiped a hand through your soaked folds. Locking eyes with you as she stroked her cock, Shand issued her final warning. “I’m going to make this messy little cunt mine.”

You clenched around nothing at her words and she laughed at your body’s reaction to her. Shand traced her tip through your folds and around your clit, teasing you until you writhed under her, whining in frustration. Her cockiness only turned you on. You felt her notch her tip at your entrance and you took a deep breath as you waited for her to enter you. Then, with a serious look and a raised brow, she asked for your permission.

“Fuck me,” you breathed, nodding your consent. “Show me you’re more than just talk.”

You got exactly what you’d asked for. 

With a roll of her hips, Shand sheathed herself in you. You cried out, body arching off the bed and begging for more. Without waiting for you to adjust – not needing to you as you’d been properly stretched out and prepared by Boba earlier – she pulled out and slammed back in again and again, punching the very air out of your lungs. You glanced down between your bodies to where her body met yours. Every time she withdrew, you caught a glimpse of your arousal coating the dildo. It only made you wetter and you groaned at the sight as you fell back against the bed.

“Oh fuck,” you mewled, as you gasped for breath. “Yes, yes, yes!”

With each stroke, she went deeper and deeper inside you, filling your aching pussy like no one ever had before. You savored the slap of her thighs against the back of yours as she pounded into you. The first tears pearled at the corners of your eyes, but you didn’t wipe them away. You wanted her to see what she did to you and your whimpers only spurred her on.

“You like it when it hurts a little, don’t you?” Fennec asked. Her cool demeanor reflected the way she fucked you. She was in control.

You nodded against the pillow with a dizzy little smile. You lifted your slip, bunching up the fabric to reveal your chest to her. You keened under her gaze as she admired the way your tits bounced in time with her thrusts. Putting on a show for her, you squeezed and fondled your breasts, pinching your nipples until they were hard and perky. She wasn’t one to say much but when her hands gripped your hips tighter, hard enough to leave bruises Boba would see later, you knew she liked it.

And you… you liked her.

“Fennec,” you pleaded, speaking her name perhaps for the first time, “kiss me.”

Pushing your knees to your chest, she bent over you and slotted her mouth against yours. Her tongue licked at the seam of your lips, seeking entrance you granted easily. Her lips were surprisingly soft and moved perfectly with yours. Like you were made for each other. Your chest hollowed at the taste of her and you cupped her cheeks, unwilling to part for a moment. It was like you’d spent years wandering Tatooine’s dry desert and only her kiss could quench your thirst. By some miracle, she only deepened the kiss.

Even as she kissed you, Fennec’s hips never stopped their steady pace and you felt yourself cresting higher and higher at the deeper angle. You encircled your arms around her neck, wanting to hold her close. But when she shredded against something divine and you threw your head back in pleasure, lips parting from hers as desperate, breathy moans escaped you.

Eyes screwed shut, you focused on the sensation of her breath against your skin, her body moving with yours, her cock filling you deliciously. It was all too much. Then Fennec gripped your chin and forced you to look at her. You noticed the sweat on her brow and the few strands of hair slipped out of her perfect plait. She commanded you through gritted teeth. “Cum on my cock, princess.”

Without warning, she changed her tactic, abandoning her deep thrusts to focus the head of her cock on that spongy soft spot inside you. As you came, falling apart with a wail for the whole castle to hear, you soaked her and the sheets. Every nerve in your body burned as pleasure licked through your veins like wildfire. You willingly succumbed to the inferno, body and soul.

Eyes still shut and ears ringing, her name fell from your lips as a whisper. Fen, Fen, Fen. Your tight cunt squeezed her length as she fucked you through your orgasm, yet she kissed you with a gentleness you never knew she was capable of, breathing air back into your lungs.

When you finally slipped back into consciousness, Fennec pulled out carefully. Before she moved off the bed, she stopped to admire her work. Your pussy was still pulsing and you could feel the dampened sheets beneath you. She looked down at you with half lidded eyes and her head held high and you knew she was proud. She only had one word for you. “Mine.”

“Only if you can share.”

She shrugged and moved away from the bed to take off her harness. “Can he?”

“We have an understanding.” She didn’t say anything, but she was pleased with your answer. She must’ve expected it.

A moment later, she returned to you. She laid on her side with a bent arm propping up her head and watched you come down from your high with a satisfied smirk. You mirrored her position. Even the dim light failed to soften her as she relaxed next to you. Fennec looked as powerful as she did with a rifle in hand. But you were starting to see what laid beneath her hard exterior.

Reaching out carefully, you dared soothe a hand over the toned muscle of her arm, across her strong shoulder, and down her sweat-slicked chest. Cupping her breast, you squeezed the tender flesh through her tunic. Fennec’s lashes fluttered at the gesture though she resisted the temptation to let her eyes slip shut and give in to your touch. But you felt the way her breath hitched beneath your hand. Exhausted and perfectly sated, you were on the verge of sleep and yet you wanted more. You wanted her. “Fen,” you called to her softly, as you circled her hardening nipple through her shirt with the pad of your finger, “I want to make you feel good now.”

“Don’t worry, princess,” she smirked, “I’m not finished with you yet.”

“Then take your clothes off and spread your legs for me,” you suggested with a smile.

“No,” she replied tersely. You were confused for a moment before she continued. “I want to sit on this pretty face.”

You beamed at her. “You think I’m pretty?”

“I don’t know how Fett puts up with your mouth,” she mumbled. But there was no bite to her comment. You liked this new playful side.

“I’ll show you.” You licked your lips. “Let me taste you.”

Pushing you on your back, she kissed you soundly. Only when the two of you parted for air did you notice she’d wriggled out of her briefs. You tapped your finger on your lips, and she obliged you, quickly moving to straddle your face. The thought crossed your mind that she could probably crush you between her thighs if she was so inclined, but you decided that was the only way you’d want to go.

With a soft touch, you caressed her thighs, encouraging her to open up even further for you, and ran your hands up her body. As your fingers brushed the hem of her shirt, you hoped she’d take the hint and strip it off. Surprisingly, she listened. Now almost completely bare to you, your eyes darted across her body to take her in. She still wore a black band that covered the biomechanics in her midsection that allowed her to live. It was nothing short of a miracle that she was with you that night and you couldn't help but think that she was as beautiful as she was strong. You tucked that thought away for another time

“I like your perky tits, Fen,” you cooed instead as you kissed a hot trail across the inside of her thigh toward her center. For the first time since you’d met Fennec, her cheeks rouged, and a burst of confidence surged through you. Sliding your hands around to her ass, you pulled her cunt to your mouth and sealed your lips to her slick core. You hummed against her and pulled away just to tell her how sweet she tasted before diving back in. Her breathy little moan was reward enough.

You flattened your tongue against her folds a few times before swirling the tip of it around her clit. You suckled the little bundle of nerves and her thighs clenched around your head. As pleasure seemed to overtake her, she ground her core against your face, and you focused your attention there. You pulled delicious sighs from her, the like of which you didn’t know she was capable of, as you devoured her until she was shaking above you and coming on your tongue.

Before she could slip away from you, you kissed her clit. She rolled her eyes at you but smiled. A flustered Fennec was a sight to behold. As she moved off your face, you sat up, arms wrapping around her as you kissed her stomach, her tits, her neck, and then finally her lips, letting her taste herself. “See?” you murmured against her lips, “You’re actually very sweet.”

She sighed but relaxed into your hold for a moment.

“Let’s clean up,” she suggested eventually.

“I’ll be ready for round three after,” you said around a yawn as you stood on shaky legs.

Fennec looked puzzled over your tally for a moment before she scoffed. “So, Fett only lasted one round?”

“He was tired,” you defended.

“And so are you.”

You failed to hide your surprise when she guided you back to bed but you knew better than to question it. You prized your place in Boba’s bed and beside his throne, but he wouldn’t miss you that night. As the two of you slipped between the fresh sheets, a flash of uncertainty crossed her face.

“You’re his princess,” she said quietly, as if thinking out loud. But it was a needless worry.

“I’ll be your princess too,” you promised.

Perhaps in a rare moment of sentimentality, Fennec gathered you into her arms and kissed you. One kiss turned into two and then three. You couldn’t tell how long you lied there together, lips coming together and pulling apart again and again.

“Oh, my sweet Fen,” you whispered, “I’m going to fall in love with you.”

“Maybe I’ll let you,” she teased. But you knew what she really meant. Somehow, you’d slipped past her hard exterior. And somehow, this woman you’d hardly exchanged more than a few words with, only ever admired from afar, had a hold of your heart. You’d always known you were someone with too much love to give.

“Sleep, princess,” she commanded gently.  

That time, your heart soared at the endearment.

... . ...

Thank you for reading!

Fennec Tags: @onfiretakemehigher @book-hoardingdragon @moonlit-djarin @ifimayhaveaword @fvriosa @leonieb @huliabitch @cinewhore @maythxthirstbxwithyou @mitchi-c @alexisinorbit @heresathreebee @gondowan @softskywalkcr @bellenuitcesoir @justanotherblonde23

[samuel-de-champagne-problems]

It's Delicate: Part II

Summary: Spencer Reid finds himself at a gas station at 2:00 am, thinking he’s only leaving with a cup of crappy coffee. But something taped to the door catches his eye. Spencer leaves the gas station with more than he intended: the chance at a friend, and maybe something more along the way.

Word Count: 3.6 k

Author’s Note: Here's the second part in It's Delicate, my first chapter fic. I've planned out kind of where I see this eventually going! Thank you to anyone who reads, likes, comments, and reblogs. It really means the world to me.

Content Warnings: Expletive language (3 uses), mentions of drug use, sexual innuendo

READ PART I

It's Delicate Masterlist

It's Delicate

Sitting on the plane, Spencer looks out from the little window. For hours, there’s been nothing but corn fields and clouds. It’s eerily peaceful, being there high above the clouds. His whole life Spencer has felt this distance between him and everyone else, but nothing makes that feeling more prominent than being strapped in a glorified metal box 35,000 feet off the Earth’s surface. But the thing is, Spencer does need to be flying above the trees to feel lonely. He can do that with two feet on the ground.

Luke sits across Spencer, the table between them and a deck of playing cards are spread out across its surface. He has to nudge Spencer’s leg from under the table, trying to bring him back to reality as he stares out the window.

“Whatcha thinking,” Luke asks, Spencer has been noticing more and more that Luke is one of the few people that actually listens to him.

Spencer, whose mind is racing too fast to even formulate an articulate thought, attempts to dodge Luke’s question with a noncommittal shrug.

“Reid, these cases are hard for all of us, you gotta know that man,” Luke says, laying down a four of a kind.

Spencer narrows his eyes, shocked that it hasn’t clicked yet for the rest of the team. He cracks his neck, preparing to answer Luke.

“We almost locked up an innocent man, Alvez. I almost sent another man to the same fate as myself. What kind of fucked up message is that?” Spencer says, throwing down the cards on the table. He doesn’t wait for Luke to respond.

“I fold,”

Spencer walks off into the small kitchenette to make a cup of coffee. He doesn’t want to think about his increased reliance on coffee, because he knows it’s a hot cup of coffee or a cold needle of Dilaudid in his veins. Spencer checks his watch, it’s 10:17 pm, maybe too late to find a meeting at a church or rec center somewhere.

He sneaks a peak at his phone, which was still unfortunately on Airplane Mode, he hasn’t even gotten a chance to see if Y/N has responded. He doesn’t know much about her, just as much as she knows about him.

It’s a brave new world for Spencer and he’s knee deep into the unknown.

Spencer can feel Luke’s eyes on him. He just knows that the minute he gets home, a certain tech expert will be ringing him. He knows that it’s Luke’s way of caring, but for someone who’s been alone for so long, having people that actually care is almost drowning.

Walking back to his seat, Spencer hands Luke a coffee. He smiles slightly; it’s the awkward smile that he used to make when intimating police chiefs and idiot cops would look him up and down like he’s a TA. It’s a peace offering for Luke, who despite his tough looking exterior, is one of the kindest people Spencer knows.

“Look, Reid. I’m sorry that we didn’t put it together. It’s just that man that we caught, he’s not like you. He’s not innocent of crimes, he’s just innocent of this crime,” Luke says in an attempt to make Spencer feel a little bit better.

“The thing is Luke, I’m exactly like that man,”

Spencer returns to staring out the window. The cards and the coffee on the table are long ignored for the silence that is found when you’re high above the clouds.

--

Spencer hears Tara and Emily murmur quietly about going out for a round of drinks. Luke accepts, while JJ and Matt decline, eager to get home to their families. Emily looks over at Spencer, her eyes silently scanning him, his body language. Spencer knows that there’s nothing he can hide from Emily, so there’s no use in trying to pretend he’s alright when she can take one look at him and know that nothing is right.

“You guys have fun, I’m going to head home and get some sleep. I plan on visiting my mom tomorrow and mornings are usually better for her,” Spencer says, slinging his go bag around his shoulders and making the trek back to the security to check out.

He walks slowly, enjoying the sound of the crickets chirping as he trudges along. Spencer tries not to think about the man, Richard, who was almost locked up for a crime that he didn’t commit. Spencer is pretty sure that being the person to throw an innocent man in jail is worse than being the innocent man in jail.

Spencer’s phone buzzes loudly, disturbing the silence of his walk. He looks at the phone to see a couple of messages from Y/N. Spencer slides open the lock to his phone and hits the button to read her messages.

Y/N: Spencer...that has a nice ring to it. So tell me a little bit about yourself. Your big three, but as books. Go! 🌞🌙⬆️

Furrowing his brow, Spencer reads the message over again. He does not have a clue what “big three” means, but it seems like some sort of pop culture thing that he’s not skilled in. He wants to text Garcia for a translation, but he’s also not too keen on telling her how he came across Y/N’s number.

Y/N: I assume you’re working, but I'm kind of impatient so I’ll give you mine 🙃 I’m a Little Women sun, an Emma moon, and an In Cold Blood rising.

Y/N: Oh no….I hope my astrology didn’t turn you off

Y/N: Not that I was trying to turn you on

Y/N: omg Y/N please shut the fuck up

Astrology? Spencer isn’t one to judge, but he’s a scientist first and foremost. The idea that there is something written about him in the stars seems like ludicrous. He decided to ignore the other messages, particularly the ones with a little more than slight innuendo.

Spencer: Y/N- I’m sorry I just got out of work. As for my big three, I’m not sure about astrology. I don’t particularly believe in pseudoscience. But those are good choices. In Cold Blood is an excellent choice. Capote spent years researching the case. In fact his prose and technique inspired the entire “Nonfiction novel” genre. The world of journalism and true crime would not be where it is without Capote’s work.

Y/N: Oh my god. You are a total nerd. 🙀

That stops Spencer right in his tracks. He’s only a couple of yards away from the Volvo at this point, but somehow it feels a million miles away. You are a total nerd. The words replay in his mind as the small gray bubbles pop up again. Spencer can feel his heart constrict at Y/N’s words. It’s ridiculous, he’s nearly 34 and is getting upset that a stranger called him a nerd. Spencer unlocks his car and tosses his go bag, phone included onto the passenger seat.

After a couple of minutes his phone buzzes again. He’s half tempted to answer it, but the way his heart seems to beat faster tells him to ignore it.

Y/N: I fucking love it and I think you’ll love this too

Spencer’s entire demeanor changes as he reads the message. He’s always had difficulties reading emotion in writing, especially when he can’t analyze the handwriting. Sometimes, it’s even harder to judge inflection during conversations. Maybe that is why Spencer has spent all this time studying people, studying the way that their minds work. Before he can get too lost in his thoughts, another message pops up.

Y/N: Meet Capote and Second Cat

Y/N: They are the loves of my life

Spencer: They are very...distinguished looking. Capote is an excellent name choice then. Second Cat is also quite catchy.

Spencer hesitates before sending the message, he notices that Y/N uses what Garcia calls “emojis” quite frequently. He assumes that it’s some sort of “texting lingo” that expresses emotion in small graphics. Great, he thinks. He already has a difficult time deciphering Y/N’s cryptic wording and now he’s got to analyze these emojis.

Maybe he should profile her. He re-reads the message and settles on a “😄” because he figures that he can’t go wrong with offering Y/N a smile.

Spencer: I don’t have a cat, but when I was a kid I always wanted one, they’re quite good companions for those that live several different kinds of lifestyles. From active to sedentary, they are adaptable and independent. Honestly they are the perfect pet.

Y/N: Is this your way of telling you’re a crazy cat man? 😜 🙀

Spencer, still sitting in his car that’s parked in the parking lot, chuckles at Y/N’s response to his message. Maybe it’s just easier to ignore his rambling when it’s done through 1s and 0s and there isn’t a face to the words.

Spencer: I’m actually more of a fish guy

Y/N: Like a “I-like-to-go-fishing-and-post-picture-of-myself-kissing-my-catch-on-Tinder” kind of fish guy or...I can’t think of any other kind of fish men

Spencer, not totally understanding the obvious joke that Y/N is trying to make, settles on something that he hasn’t really ever tried: being himself.

Spencer: Not quite sure what a Tinder is, but I think fishing is terrifying and kissing a fish is something out of nightmares. But his name is Leo

Y/N: DiCaprio?

Spencer: Uhh, Tolstoy

Y/N: Good😉 ⚔️🕊️ 🇷🇺

Spencer glances at his clock on the control panel, it tells him that he’s been messaging with Y/N back and forth for nearly 22 minutes. He nearly forgot how tired he was.

Spencer: Y/N- I’m so sorry but, I just got to my car to drive home from work. I’ll text you tomorrow morning about the book club, maybe we can figure out some things.

Y/N: OMG Spencer!! you should have told me. I’ve been talking ur ear off. sleep well and yes please tomorrow we can talk about the book club

Y/N: Good night, Book Buddy 😴

Spencer wants to respond to Y/N, but he doesn’t know what to say. She seems to text so easily, and judging by that, she must be around Spencer’s age or a little bit younger. Besides JJ and Penelope, Spencer has never had a friend close to his age. It’s a strange new territory for him and he’s walking in head first into No Man’s Land.

He starts his Volvo, the check engine still lights but, reminding him once again to go get it fixed. Driving away from the parking lot, Spencer hands over his ID to Gina, the security guard. She checks his ID and gives him a tired smile. Spencer, as he drives home to his apartment, thinking about what books he and Y/N will read together. He wonders what kind of books are her favorite, if they have any authors that they can obsess over together, or if what she thinks a poet’s prose is.

The summer air rushing in through the window is nowhere as warm and as comforting as thought of Spencer finally having a friend that isn’t able to read the scars of his past in the text bubbles that pop up on her screen.

--

When Spencer opens his eyes for the first time that morning, he isn’t sure where he is. Sometimes, before he can stop his thoughts from travelling there, Spencer thinks he’s still in jail. He hates the feeling of terror that rushes over him but he hates the idea of being vulnerable a little bit more. But the softness of his pillows and the coolness of his cotton sheets remind him that he’s not sleeping on a hard cot with only a layer of fabric over his body. The light streams in through the half closed blinds, and Spencer judges by how brightly the sun shines in, it must be around 9:45 am.

He supposes that he prefers the way the sun’s rays paint horizontal bars across his face more than the vertical bars that cast gray shadows over his cell at Milburn Penitentiary.

It’s a day off from work, so Spencer didn’t set an alarm, instead allowing his mind and his body to catch up on some much needed rest. The nightmares have been getting better, but his dreams are still haunted by the way that he hardly recognizes himself anymore. Deciding that it will be a day spent in pajamas, Spencer goes to his bookshelf in his bedroom to pick out a couple of novels to read while he drinks his morning coffee and defrosts some of Luke’s strawberry pastries.

Before heading out of his room, Spencer stops himself in the doorway. He replays the events of last night. He declined to go out with the rest of the team, while he walked to his car he thought about the crickets telling the temperature, and he read over Y/N’s messages.

Y/N.

He promised he’d text her back in the morning about their book club. Last night, she didn’t seem to mind Spencer’s long messages and awkward phrasing. He still doesn’t really know how this Book Buddy thing would work, but since he found Y/N’s number on the flyer, he can only assume that she knows what to do. He leaps on his bed, landing with thud on his belly, to grab his phone that charges on his nightstand.

Spencer settles at his kitchen table, a cup of steaming hot Dark Roast coffee in a Captain Spock mug in one hand and, surprisingly, his phone in the other. He scrolls through the messages from last night, Y/N’s cat and emojis tempt a smile to Spencer’s face.

Not entirely sure how to start the conversation again, Spencer looks around for inspiration until his eyes land on a certain fish tank in the corner of his apartment. He snaps a quick picture of Leo and attaches it to the message.

Spencer: Good Morning from Leo & Spencer

Spencer sets down his phone after a moment when he realizes that Y/N is probably not going to answer him back in a couple of seconds. He takes out a strawberry pastry from his freezer and puts it into the toaster oven on a non-stick baking sheet. His thumbs run across the texture of the book he started on the plane ride after his and Luke’s ill fated poker game. It's a thin book of collected essays on the meaning of life. Camus, to Spencer, is a little pessimistic with his droning on about the meaninglessness of life. Though Spence has seen the absolute worst that humanity has to offer, he still has to believe that there’s a deeper meaning behind it all.

His toaster oven rings, altering him so that his toasted strawberry pastry is cooked. He plates his breakfast and pours himself another cup of coffee- he’ll need it to get through Camus’s section on Absurdism this early in the morning. But the flash of Spencer’s phone screen sends him reaching for his phone. Y/N replied to his message.

Y/N: hi leo!!!

Y/N: and you too Spencer :) Did you get a good night’s sleep. You got back late it seems.

Spencer, taking a bite of the strawberry pastry, ignores the burning sensation in his mouth. He types out a response to Y/N as he washes down the bite with a swing of coffee.

Spencer: I did, thank you. Can you tell me a little bit more about this book buddy thing. From what I gathered from the flyer it’s like a little book club of our own and we meet at the bookstore?

It doesn’t take long for Y/N to respond. The little gray dots pop up almost immediately after Spencer’s message is delivered.

Y/N: That’s about right! Is it okay if I call you? Kinda easier to talk that way 🤷‍♀️

Spencer reads over the message a couple of times. He doesn’t really like to talk on the phone and only does it out of necessity. He’s pretty sure that his voice is grating and his vocal fry is quite irritating. Yet, he finds himself replying “yes” to Y/N. Soon enough, his phone buzzes in his hand and Spencer has to remind himself how to pick up a call.

“Spencer? Um, this is Spencer Reid, right?” the voice says. It’s a woman’s voice and he can only assume that it’s Y/N, considering it is her phone number calling him.

“Y/N, uh hi. This is Dr. Spencer- I mean this is Spencer,” he says, nearly forgetting that Y/N doesn’t know him as Dr. Reid, but as just Spencer. It’s been a long time since someone has known him as Spencer.

“Oh great! It’s wonderful to finally have a voice to your name. So about these buddy reads. You seem to have a good grasp of what they are,” Y/N’s voice trails off a little bit at the end and Spencer finds it natural to fill in the silence.

“Yes, the flyer was quite informative. But I was wondering, do we read the same books or do we read different books?” Spencer asks, trying to restrain himself from scaring Y/N off. But something about her made him think that she didn’t scare easily.

Y/N chuckles lightly in the speaker of her phone, “that’s a good question, uh, I was actually going to ask you what you would rather. We can read the same books, or if it’s okay with you we can choose what the other would read for that week,”

“Oh really?” Spencer says, very much aware how his voice rises a couple of octaves. He can’t trust himself to hold back on rambling over the phone Y/N, so he resorts to using his strained, brittle voice that’s full of hesitation and restraint.

“That’s the plan, so whatcha thinking, Spencer,” Y/N says playfully, like she can sense that phone conversations maybe not make him feel at ease. There’s something so natural and silvery about her voice; it reminds Spencer of an audiobook reader. While he’s not too keen on audiobooks, he’s sure that he’d listen to anything she reads or has to say.

“Um, I think it sounds interesting to pick out books for each other. I tend to gravitate towards more technical books or even books that aren’t in English so, uh, I think it would be interesting to get out of my comfort zone,” Spencer says, cringing internally at using the word “interesting” twice in a couple of sentences.

“Well, as long as you don’t pick out something in physics or anything by Ayn Rand then I’d say we’re good,” Y/N says. Spencer thinks it’s a joke, but he’s not too sure how to respond.

“Will you still be my Book Buddy if I read 1 out of 2 of those?” Spencer asks, hoping she’d get that he is trying to continue the joke.

“Oh no Spencer please don’t tell me you’re an Ayn Rand fanboy,” she says, and by the airy way she laughs, Spencer ventures to guess his joke landed successfully.

“So,” Spencer starts, he never has made plans with people outside of his team, and on top of that, there’s something about Y/N’s quickness that makes him a little nervous to meet her.

“I’m talking your ear off, aren’t I? Please Spencer, if you’re going to be my Book Buddy, you’re going to have to get used to me talking a lot, especially you pick out good books, which, I already have a feeling you’re going to be favorite Book Buddy,”

For once in his life, Spencer doesn’t really know how to respond. He lets out something in between a strangled laughter and a noncommittal chuckle.

“So,” Y/N says, mirroring Spencer’s earlier words, “so are you free tonight, I can meet you at the bookstore..”

Y/N’s voice trails off and Spencer leaps to finish her sentences. It doesn’t feel like his interjecting or interrupting, but like he’s snapping a puzzle piece together.

“Does 7 work?” “7 is great, Spencer. It’s a date,”

Those three little words send Spencer’s eyes flying wide open. He scrambles to come up with answer to louden the silence that falls, but he swears he can hear a string of quiet curses before Y/N manages to squeak out a small “goodbye,”

Y/N’s last words play back in Spencer’s ears. He scolds himself for being so weird and awkward that the very idea of going on a date with him would send Y/N in a tizzy. It’s not a date, because Spencer can’t think about it being a date. It’s not a date because of the looming photo above his mantle that freezes his future in the past. It’s not a date because of the nightmare of vertical bars that haunt his dreams

It’s not a date. It’s so not a date because Spencer would call Luke to come over to help him if it was.

“Hey Luke,” Spencer says, trying to control the nervous waves in his voice, “no man, I’m fine, it’s uh, easier if you just come over. I’m fine, really,”

Y/N: I really hope you're not an Ayn Rand fanboy 😉

It’s so not a date.

--THANK YOU FOR READING--

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[bourbonbees]

Suptober Day 6- Cemetery Boys

https://archiveofourown.org/works/34336042

Rating- G Jack POV

Jack has discovered there are a great deal of things that he loves about being human, he loves eating cake, taking his dog for walks, and swimming, but there’s nothing he loves more than his family. His family is not conventional, he’s got three dads, one of which is an angel, but all of them love him unconditionally. It’s rocky at first with Dean but after some quality time spent listening to Zep and going fishing together, the grumpy hunter warms up to him. It also doesn’t hurt that Jack’s first dad, Castiel, is also Dean’s partner and therefore holds a lot of sway over him, whether he likes it or not. Sam, his third dad was the best! He’s the one that establishes family movie night, Jack’s favorite night of the week!

Sam lets Jack pick the movies pretty much every week, much to Dean’s dismay. This week Jack chooses Ghostbusters as his pick. It’s great, he especially loves the jokes and the Stay Puffed Marshmallow man. He isn’t sure where the writers did their research for the movie though, his experiences with ghosts contain a lot less whimsy and a lot more salting and burning. The movie is just wrapping up when it hits him, they don’t have a name, every great team of heroes has a name.

“Hey, why don’t we have a name?” Jack poses the question, looking to Dean for a response.

“Kid, how much candy have you had? Are you sugar crashing? Remember, me Dean, you Jack, that annoying guy over there, Sam, this adorable ray of sunshine, Castiel.” Dean is concerned, he feels Jack’s forehead and looks him over, his parental instincts kicking in.

“No like a team name! Like there’s The Avengers, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, uh The Fellowship of the Ring.” Jack lists off, Sam sending him a proud smile at the last one.

“Jack, hunters don’t really do teams. We’re kinda solitary, it’s our nature.” Sam explains, causing Jack even further confusion as he looks around at his family. They do everything together, live together, celebrate wins together, spend holidays together, work together, is that not a team?

“We’re not a team? Isn’t a family a team?” Jack frowns, worrying that he’s misread a long series of social cues. He is prone to that sometimes, his brain working a bit differently from his dads, neurodivergent, that’s what Sam had called it.

“Jack, oh, of course we’re a team. But more than that, we’re family.” Cas swoops in, reaching over and patting Jack on the shoulder. Cas is always the gentlest of his dads, he gives really good hugs, and is the one Jack goes to on the days where being a human is too much to deal with.

“Would it make you feel better if we had a team name?” Dean offers, following Cas’ lead. Jack doesn’t miss when Cas sends Dean a small nod of approval. Dean has a different parenting approach, sometimes he’s a bit harder on Jack. Jack doesn’t like that but he understands that Dean is trying.

“Yeah, I was thinking Cemetery Boys!” Jack says right away, looking around the room expectantly. Sam chokes slightly on his beer while Cas smiles approvingly, Dean laughs softly, shaking his head at Jack.

“Well we do spend a disproportionate amount of time in cemeteries, so it makes sense to me.” Jack defends, his cheeks feeling hot, blushing, that’s what Sam had told him it was. Sometimes Jack hates being human, blushing is embarrassing and makes him feel a bit like a baby.

“Shouldn’t we be cemetery men?” Dean questions, raising a quizzical brow at Jack.

“Technically speaking, Jack and myself are neither male nor female. So, no.” Cas supplies, shrugging his shoulders at Dean and earning an eye roll. Jack doesn’t understand why his dads enjoy teasing each other so much, maybe annoying someone was another human way to express love?

“So, you’re telling me, I came out as bisexual for nothing because, I’m not really dating a man?” Dean blanches, gently smacking Cas on the shoulder. Hitting people is another love language Jack has learned, but not too hard, he learned that after accidently punching Sam a little too enthusiastically on the shoulder. Play fighting is good, actual violence is bad, he had explained that to him.

“We’re non-binary! Claire taught me that.” Jack is happy to interrupt, always happy to share the latest things he’d learned. He loves Claire for that reason, she’s always full of new things to learn, she is an excellent big sister. “Claire, Me, Cas, and Dean, we’re all LGBLT? Or is it LGBTQ? Either way, Claire is a lesbian, she also taught me that. And Dean, you’re a bisexual! Cas, you’re gay, I think? So, you didn’t come out for nothing, you came out for your non-binary partner.” Ha! Jack is very proud, this is one area he feels confident he knows more about than Sam, Dean, or even Cas.

“You’re surprisingly well informed for a toddler.” Sam compliments, tipping his beer bottle at him.

“The toddler age range ends at 3, I assure you, Jack is 4. He is no longer a toddler. I read all the development books.” Cas corrects, earning a laugh from Dean and a groan from Sam.

“He did, trust me Sammy, made me read some of them as well. Babies are weird man. Glad you came out fully formed kid, it was a relief.” Dean chuckles. Jack is relieved he came out fully formed too, it’s a lot more fun hanging out with his family when he can talk to them like this.

“I’m a celestial being, age doesn’t exist for me. I am as old or as young as I want to be at any given minute. Isn’t that neat?” Jack prides himself on choosing this form, a teenage body, he likes it because he can help his family. He likes going hunting, driving cars, and helping Dean cook dinner, a baby couldn’t do any of that!

“He really is your son-uh I mean they really are your child?” Dean self corrects, Jack notices he does that a lot more lately, again he really is trying to be better. Jack admires that about Dean, it’s something he tries to emulate as best as he can, always working to be a better person and make his mistakes right.

“Oh, I’m comfortable with he/they, just like my dad! I do feel like a boy most of the time.” Jack looks to Cas who nods along with him. They’d talked about it once, Cas explained that Jack could change a number of things about himself if he wished, if it would better match his soul. But Jack is really and truly happy with who he is. So is Cas.

“Yeah that’s my son.” Cas says fondly, pulling Jack into a hug. This is a good hug, the kind that makes Jack feel safe and cared for. Cas always makes him feel like he belongs, that no matter what he has a place in his arms.

That night, Jack sets a plan into motion. He waits until everyone is asleep and gets to work on creating gifts for his family. He uses his powers to manifest a set of matching black crew neck sweatshirts with the words ‘Cemetery Boys’ embroidered on the front in white thread. He then designs a magnet, putting a little ghost and tombstone on it. Once he’s satisfied he goes through the recycling and finds a box to put the sweatshirts in.

The next part is the most dangerous. Jack, creeps down the hall to the door that leads into the garage attached to the bunker. His eyes glimmer when he finds his target, the black 67 Impala, sitting dead center in the garage. Dean had just waxed her the day before so she was extra shiny. Jack likes when Baby is shiny, it makes the sun reflect on his face, nice and warm. He takes the magnet and carefully places it on the bumper, making sure not to scuff or scratch the shiny metal. Then in a flash, he is back in his room, laying in his bed as if nothing has happened.

Dean doesn’t notice the magnet until they are packing for a hunt the next day, a simple salt and burn case in Wisconsin. The whole family is going! Dean has even promised Jack that he will take him to Wisconsin Dells if it goes well and they will go to a place called Deer Park where he could pet and feed a bunch of deer. Jack likes animals, sometimes more than people, they’re much less complicated.

“Oh my god! My Baby is a whore! You gave her a tramp stamp?” Dean gasps, pointing to the offending ‘Cemetery Boys’ magnet on the bumper.

“You like it? I made it myself!” Jack beams with pride, hoping Dean was speechless because he was blown away by his ability to create magnets.

“Also, the term you’re looking for is sex worker. You need to be more sex positive Dean, especially for someone, who from the sound I hear coming from your room at night, seems to enjoy sex a great deal.” Jack blurts out nervously when Dean doesn’t respond. Jack tends to do that, he wishes he could stop, another part of what makes him different from most people.

“Oh, for the love of Christ. Please Jack, no.” Sam is doing something Claire told Jack is a facepalm, meaning he was either embarrassed or frustrated, perhaps both?

“Do not be ashamed of our healthy sex life, Dean. But do but ashamed of your gendered slurs and generally overdramatic demeanor. The car is unharmed, it’s a magnet.” Cas steps in, doing the teasing thing again. Jack really doesn’t understand his dads, but he’s glad they seem happy together.

“I swear one day Baby and I will drive away and leave you all behind. Traitors.” Dean threatens, this is a joke, Jack measures. Dean does that a lot, uses sarcasm and empty threats, at first they used to confuse and frighten Jack but now he just accepts it’s part of his nature. Dean is grumpy. Loveable but grumpy.

“See your theatrics are quite comical. You couldn’t leave us if you tried. Who would open the pickle jars for you, darling?” Cas smirks, Jack remembers witnessing this scene, Dean saying all the “no words” at a jar of gherkins as he struggled for a good 5 minutes, until his dad took the jar and opened it within two seconds.

“It was one time! And I swear I loosened it!” Dean glowers, clearly ashamed by the great pickle debacle of last week.

“Dads, stop. I will remove the magnet.” Jack decides it’s his job to play peacemaker, he steps up and gently takes the magnet off baby’s bumper, Dean visibly sighs in relief. Jack tries to hide his disappointment, he’d meant the sticker as a gift.

Cas notices his mood shift and is by his side, pulling Jack into a side hug. “Hey, you can put it on my truck.” He offers, rubbing Jack’s back and making him instantly feel better, must be magic dad powers Jack figures.

“Thanks dad, this is why you’re my favorite.” He says without thinking, Sam and Dean giving him matching offended expressions.

“Uh-what about me, I’m the one that sneaks you candy when Cas isn’t looking.” Sam makes a good point, he is exceptionally good at sneaking. He and Jack have so much fun together, that’s how they ended up with Miracle the dog. Sam had helped Jack smuggle him into the bunker and once both Jack and Cas had bonded with the dog, Dean couldn’t kick him out. Though Jack knows that Dean loves the dog just as much, he’s caught him slipping Miracle some of the good bacon when he thinks no one is looking.

“No Dean is the one that gives me candy. You help me pull pranks!” Jack laughs as Dean, flinches, quickly busing himself with packing all their bags in the trunk along with the weapons they’d need.

“Dean!” Cas says in his low, ‘oh no you’re in trouble,’ voice. “We’ve dicussed this, Jack’s intake of high fructose corn syrup is frighteningly high. He needs to eat real food.” He adds. Nougat is a food, Jack thinks privately, nougat might be his favorite food in fact.

“He’s a kid, he’ll be fine. Dean and I lived on that shi-stuff as kids and we turned out alright.” Sam, usually the vegetable police, surprisingly comes to Jack and Dean’s rescue, earning a matching raised brow from them both.

“Did you though?” Cas challenges, hand on his hip, sometimes dad gets sassy. Jack likes when dad gets sassy because it’s funny, makes him laugh.

“Well damn, don’t sugar coat it or anything babe.” Dean says in disbelief, opening the passenger door for Cas, Sam climbing into Baby’s backseat before Dean motions for Jack to come sit behind him. “Do I even want to know?” He sighs as he spots the box Jack is carrying.

“Well you’ve all been distracting me, I almost forgot.” Jack pauses as he opens the box and holds up the Sam sized sweatshirt. “I made us all shirts! Team shirts, we’re the Cemetery Boys!” He says proudly, shoving the shirt at Sam, then two at Cas, one for him and one for Dean. Jack pulls on his own shirt right away, stretching his arms and modeling it for them all.

“Can you all wear them for me?” Jack pulls out his trump card for this one, using the ‘look’ that Sam had taught him. He made his eyes big and kept them open just long enough so they were watering slightly, then bit his lip.

“I really screwed myself when I taught you my secrets. Really, using my own puppy eyes on me. Really short sighted of me to teach you that.” Sam sighs as he pulls on the sweatshirt, Cas doing the same.

“Nope, still not doing it. I don’t do matching shirts.” Dean holds firm, shaking his head at Cas when he holds out the sweatshirt to him as they pull out of the garage.

“Dean, the couch in the library is awfully uncomfortable. It’d be a shame if you had to sleep there.” Cas is firmly on team Cemetery Boys, pulling out the big threats to get Jack his way.

“Ugh fine, but no one can ever find out about this!” Dean groans, waiting until he’s at a stop sign at the end of the road to pull it on. Jack lights up, his team is complete, all three dads are wearing his shirt!

“It’s funny how easily emasculated you are Dean. Life is a lot more fun when you stop caring about gender expectations.” Cas smirks, Dean rolling his eyes at Cas and mimicking his know it all expression.

“Dean is sensitive, dad, and he’s really good at making pies! I think he cares less than you think he does.” Jack pauses, pleased when Dean makes eye contact with him in the rearview mirror and smiles. “Besides, I saw the pink underwear he hides when I helped with that laundry that one time.” He adds, Dean’s smile quickly disappearing, his eyes wide as he tightly gripped the steering wheel.

“Jesus Christ, kid, stop selling out all my secrets.” Dean grits between his teeth, now he is blushing. Jack knows Dean hates blushing just as much as he does.

“Oh that’s good! Can’t wait to tell Claire that one!” Sam barks out a laugh, taking his phone out of his pocket.

“You wouldn’t!” Dean hangs his head in shame when they stop for a train.

“Already did!” Sam sing songs, holding up his phone. Jack is sometimes thankful that Claire doesn’t live with them, living with your sibling seems exhausting sometimes, if Sam and Dean are any indication.

“Alright that’s enough Jack, don’t spill all the coffee. Your dad is allowed to have his secrets.” Cas intervenes, gently patting Dean’s thigh.

“Tea, dad, its spill the tea!” Jack sometimes can’t handle how out of touch his dad is. Guess that’s what happens when you’re millions of years old.

“Oh right, what’s the difference?” Cas sighs, laying his head back against the headrest as if he’s exhausted, Jack knows it’s just for dramatic effect because Cas doesn’t sleep.

“Cas, there’s big difference! One is the nectar of the gods and the other is glorified leaf water.” Dean defends, holding Cas’ hand, it’s meant to be a private gesture, but Jack can see it and it makes his heart happy.

“Tea is good.” Sam tries.

“I rest my case.” Dean counterpoints.

The case is a rough one, it turns out to be a bit more than a simple salt and burn. The ghost, a family annihilator was coming from beyond the grave to try to kill his son who had survived his attack. They had split into two groups, Dean and Cas at the cemetery burning the bones and Jack and Sam with the victim, trying to keep him safe.

“Do you think maybe we can take a photo together in our shirts?” Jack asks offhandedly as he and Sam roam the house looking for any objects that might still tether the ghost to the house.

“Why do you care so much about these shirts and taking a photo together?” Sam asks curiously, making Jack pause to think for a moment.

“Because, I’ve been watching a bunch of shows and movies, and all the families in them, they have all these photos together. They make all these memories together and they display them in their houses for everyone to see. I want that. The fact that we don’t have that makes me kind of scared, like this isn’t real. Like you all are prepared to run at a moment’s notice if I go nuclear.” Jack explains, using air quotes around the word nuclear.

“Oh. Oh. Jack, hey, it’s not like that. I guess, well we’ve been so busy saving people and hunting things, we’ve lost track of normal family things. You’re family Jack. Promise.” Sam says right away, pulling Jack into a crushing hug. Sam is strong, Jack hopes to be that strong someday.

“Can we take a photo then, a family portrait?” Jack asks hopefully.

“Family portrait? Family portrait. Shit! Jack, the family portrait!” Sam gasps, letting Jack go and looking around the room with wild eyes.

“Huh?” Jack is trying to catch up before he spots the family portrait hanging above the fireplace, both the victim and his evil departed dad in the photo. He rushes to grab it off the wall and tosses it into the fireplace. Sam pulls out a container of salt and lighter fluid, coating the portrait, then Jack tosses a match, lighting it on fire.

“Good work kid.” Sam grins as the ghost appears and then bursts into flames. “I think you’ve earned that portrait.”

True to his word, the first thing in the morning, Sam helps Jack use the laptop to find the closest portrait studio. It happens to be a JC Penney portrait studio, making Dean groan and complain about cheesy backgrounds and awkward poses that they’d likely endure. With much coaxing and further threats from Cas to relegate Dean to sleeping with Miracle on the dog bed, he agrees to the photoshoot.

Jack gets several copies of the photos made. He hands out wallet sized copies to Mary and Eileen who both coo over how adorable they look. Cas gets it framed and hangs it in the library, Dean never admits he likes it, but Jack catches him stopping to look at it every day, a proud smile on his face.

This is Jack’s family. His team. His Cemetery Boys.

[dreamer213]

Broken Machines: Lights The Dark

Chapter 6: Lesson Plan: Proper Greetings

The morning sun begins to raise over the horizon, the light peeking through space between the currents on Penny’s window. Soon Penny begin to stir and squirm until she opens her eyes awaking to a new day. She pulls out her cable and starts stretching until to realize her scroll was still in her hand. She had never let it go even in her sleep. She unlocks it to find a notification, she’s got an new message! She quickly checks through her recently received file and finds it, her new lesson plan. The content of lesson plan wasn’t anything too complexed was relatively the same with a few more topics added and some topics were expanded on which made it a bit easier to understand. Everything seemed normal until Penny looked at sent time.

3:26 am he was awake and messaged her at 3:26 am, a time when most people should be sleeping especially a growing teenage boy. This revelation hits Penny with a wave of guilt and worry. Had he stayed up to work on her lessons? Did he go to sleep after or did this disrupt his sleep schedule? Did he get enough sleep after or did he sleep at all with his schedule interrupted? These thoughts whirl around in Penny’s mind her guilt only growing with every new question.

Penny: If he’s awake right now he would have only slept three hours and four minutes. And that’s only if he fell asleep immediately after sending this which is highly unlikely.

Penny continues to fret over the matter for while until she realizes that, one she’s getting behind schedule, and two her scroll battery is on 25%.

Penny: How is this so low? I thought I plugged it in last night-

It then dawns on Penny that she had only plugged herself in last night and forgotten to do the same with her scroll during her freak out. Knowing she couldn’t waste anymore time she plugs it up then starts getting ready. By the time she’s got her boots secured her scrolls only at 40%. She’s running out of time, with no options left she does the only thing a kid In this situation can do. She opens her bedroom door and worriedly screams down the stairs to her dad.

Penny: DAD! MAY I USE YOUR PORTABLE SCROLL BATTERY PLEASE? I FORGOT TO CHARGE MY SCROLL LAST NIGHT AND I DON’T HAVE TIME TO CHARGE IT BEFORE I HAVE TO LEAVE FOR PATROL!

Downstairs in the kitchen Pietro hears her screams and chuckles at his little girl’s little mistake then shouts back a simple “OF COURSE!” then resumes he previous task of making breakfast. Meanwhile he can hear her running around upstairs, trying to herself ready in a rush. Soon she’s running downstairs and into his room to find and grab the portable charger then she runs through the kitchen, giving Pietro a quick hug and kiss before heading towards the front door. She does slow down a bit as she unlocks the door.

Penny: Sorry Dad but I can’t eat breakfast with you today, I’m running behind schedule and if I don’t leave for my post immediately I will be late and the city will be unguarded. I have my plate for dinner tonight so you don’t have to make me anything else. I’ll be home at 10 pm if there’s no changes in the schedule or emergencies. See you soon I love you bye!

And with that Penny’s out the door on her way to patrol and protect Mantle. When the afternoon comes it’s time for her lessons and she’s off to the station, on a train up, into the car, and on her way to the Schnee Manor. Upon her arrival Penny is immediately taken to the dance studio where Whitley is waiting for her, standing in the center of the room holding a large book. A manor maid stands watching from the corner of the room. She walks over to Penny takes her bags and returns to the corner as they are about to begin today’s session.

Whitley: Good Afternoon Ms. Polendina, are you ready to start your first lesson?

Penny: Absolutely!

Whitley: Good. Since today’s our first real lesson We’re starting with one of the easier subject in etiquette, first impressions more specifically how to greeting effectively. Now most wouldn’t think that something as simple as greeting people could require any further explanation then what to say and when to say it. But for the elites of Atlas a greeting is a means of making an impression, one that can establish your presence, personality, and to some degree pedigree.

Penny: But how can a greeting communicate so much about a person?

Whitley: Well I could give you a dissertation on the topic but I believe this would be best explained through example.

Whitley walks pass Penny and towards the door, before she can question him he turns around and puts his right index finger up a mere few inches from her face silencing her. He points behind her at towards the ballet bar.

Whitley: Turn around and walk towards the ballet bar.

Penny nods then turns and walks towards the bar. She’s about two feet from the bar when Whitley tell her to stop and stand still.

Whitley: Look into the mirror and say your best greeting, then I’ll tell you the impression you give off.

Penny: Okay.

Her best greeting? Outside of the usual hello, good morning, afternoon, or evening Penny only had one but she had been told it was very cute and it as of recently it had always made people smile. She looks into the mirror, puts her feet together, salutes herself, gives a sweet smile , and says her favorite word in the world.

Penny: Salutations!

The maid in the corner starts laugh, a bit amused by Penny’s actions, but catches herself and coughs to mask it. Whitley, however smirks then gives Penny as small round of applause. From her posture to her salute to the smile on her face and the bubbly way she spoke, everything was the same as that night. For a moment Whitley feels a pinch in his chest but he don’t acknowledge it and moves on.

Whitley: Very nice, your posture is perfect and your smile is sweet and welcoming. Judging by the salute you use this primarily on the citizens of Mantle while you’re on duty, yes?

Penny: Yes but only recently. Before I was stationed in Mantle I used to greet almost everyone I met this way. Some were a bit perplexed by it at first but after awhile they began to like me and we became friends. Others really enjoyed my mannerisms and would smile back and greet me in return. But since I’ve been in Mantle I used it when I have to address large crowds but sometimes I still do it when meeting some…one..new…like….

Whitley: Like when you met me?

Penny: Y…yes.

Penny looks down trying to hide her now flushed expression only to realize that impossible because the wall sized mirror in front of her. She covers her face with her hands, completely defeated.

Whitley: As for the impression, your posture and usage of a fairly uncommon and formal word like “salutations “ hints at your high intelligence, good manners, and a cultured mind. It would come off as a bit stoic and cold if not for your cheery smile and tone of voice, those elements combined conveys the idea of you as a sweet, bubbly, intelligent if not studious girl. And with addition of the informal salute you project the image of the sweet young military prodigy, well trained intelligent but so endearingly nice and sweet no one could possibly find her threatening. A very good first impression.

Penny: You could tell all of that from one greeting?

Whitley: Yes, mostly do to my understanding of body language but that’s a something we’ll go over another day. Right now our focus is teaching you how to greet properly.

Penny looks perplexed by this statement, Whitley just described her impression in a positive way so what was there to improve? What could be wrong? Penny turns around to face him.

Penny: Was there something wrong with my original greeting?

Whitley: Yes and no. The impression is great for you and the investigation , you’re demeanor does make you seem rather naïve and innocent which makes in more like that others assume the same and be less guarded with you then they would be someone like General Ironwood or an average soldier. They’d more likely speak more openly and freely around you making gathering information much easier. It would all be perfect if it not for one small thing.

Penny: Which is?

Whitley: That little salute of yours while adorably patriotic makes your motives painfully clear.

Penny: Really?

Whitley: Yes, it just screams “I’m a sweet little agent of the military sent to investigate your illegal activities!” Anyone with even a hint suspicious about you will notice and use it to discredit you. Which is the exact opposite of what we want to happen.

Whitley continues speaking while Penny looks down at her feet dejected, she had never thought to downplay her loyalty to the military . It had always felt natural to her that she show a great deal of respect as the military was the reason she existed. Her body, her restoration, her home, the energy that powered her, even the clothes she was wearing were only allowed to exist because the military approved it, so how could she not give her respect to the system that allows her existence? so how could she not show her gratitude for the gift of life they afford to her? The idea of not doing so made her feel ashamed and ungrateful but if she don’t she might compromise the entire investigation and ruin they’re chances of getting the project back on schedule. And if the project wasn’t done in time then both Mantle and Atlas….The whole world could be…could be.

Whitley: Ms. Polendina! Are you listening? Can you hear me?

Whitley’s voice pulls Penny out of her fearful thoughts. She had been so lost in own mind that she accidentally ignored him. She looks down again embarrassed by her conduct.

Penny: I can hear you. I am sorry I got distracted.

Whitley: (Sighs) Just don’t let it happen again. Now what I was trying to say that this easy issue to fix. All you need to do is change your motions and pose then it’ll be properly effective.

Whitley walks towards her and Penny turns around to face him. He opens the book he’s been holding to a specific chapter and hands it to her. The book is about first impressions the chapter was on the importance of posture and posing in changing one’s demeanor with detail illustrations and instructions on how to do different types of greeting poses.

Whitley: Look through these and find something you can use to substitute for the salute. Then you can practice until we find one that suits you.

Penny nods and looks through the book, is very expansive having information on greetings from over 100 years ago to around 30 years ago. There was also details on cultural and situational poses for different regions and times of day. Penny finds a illustration, a man with his hands behind his back and his chest pushed out, and recognizes the pose. It was the same posture General Ironwood used almost every time he gave a speech or briefing and would have her do the same if she was standing next to him during. The familiarity makes Penny feel sort of comfortable so she turns the book around and shows Whitley the page.

Penny: I’ve done this one before whenever I stand next to General Ironwood during certain event I have to mirror his posture so I have plenty of practice. It should be relatively easy and look much more natural.

Whitley: Alright, let’s try it.

Penny gives Whitley the book back, turns around, straightens her stance, puts her hands together behind her back, and repeats her greeting.

Penny: Salutations!

There’s a pause as Penny waits for a reaction, meanwhile Whitley is absolutely stunned and the maid is trying her best suppress her laughter. Despite her enthusiasm, Penny’s pose had not conveyed the same “ strong and respectful” image that Ironwood did. Rather she gave off a very “tiny girl trying to look all big and tough” impression. Whitley hangs his head and sighs.

Whitley: That was….an attempt. But it’s still not right, keep looking.

Whitley hands her the book again and Penny starts searching through it again, she stumbles on another familiar pose, a curtsy a formal greeting that was common back in the times of lords and kings. Thinking a classic might yield better results Penny give the book to Whitley and tries again this time with a curtsy. She puts her right behind her left planting the ball of her toes on the floor the bends her knees, holding her skirt on both sides as she bends down.

Penny: Salutations.

When she bends back up she see Whitley looking through the book again. He turns back to the chapter on greetings again and hand off the book. Before she can ask what went wrong this time Whitley speaks first.

Whitley: Good execution but it’s too submissive. While you need to appear non threatening and a little naïve it should never to the point of appearing submissive. In high society submissive stances like are reserved for the service staff, the simple minded, and the easily abused. If anyone with large ego or cruel attitude see you like that they’ll waste no time in destroying your self esteem and self worth for their own sick fun-(yawn)

Damn it he thought he had enough coffee that morning to prevent this but he had been wrong. Not wanting to look weak in front of her Whitley tries to cover up his yawn with a cough but it’s too late Penny had noticed. She looks at him, eyes full of worry and shame, she knows why he’s tired and it hurts her to know her lack of knowledge had cost him sleep but there was nothing she could do about it now except worry. Whitley, knowing he’s caught, tries to give a simple excuse so they can move on and get back to the lesson.

Whitley: Apologies, the afternoon fatigue must be getting to me. But I think I’ve shaken it off so let’s continue with-

Penny: You shouldn’t push yourself.

Whitley: Excuse me?

Penny: You’re young and still growing, you need to take care of yourself so your body can mature properly. That includes getting 8 hours of sleep every night so your mind and body will be well rested and is necessary to keep you healthy

Whitley is a little shocked by her words, it’s been a long time since someone worried for his health like this. It felt odd but not unpleasant to know that someone chose to care for his well being. But what was unpleasant was look on her face. Her smile had been replaced by worried frown and she keeping looking down at the floor like a child about to be scolded. Why was she acting like she did something wrong? Whitley ponders on what it could possibly caused it but he didn’t have much to go on. They hadn’t known each other long and their direct correspondence had been limited to yesterday and the message he se-the time stamped message he sent at the ungodly hours of the early morning. Had she notices the time and blamed herself for it? How immature, he thought that being an associate of Ironwood’s she’d be use to workaholics and how they work but once again she had surprised him. He shakes his head and sighs.

Whitley: Thank you for your concern, but we have more important things to do right now. Let’s focus on our task and keep looking.

Penny nods and they continue with the lessons. They find more poses to try but non have the same flare as her signature pose. After many failed attempts their session almost over, Whitley pinching the bridge of his nose in frustration while Penny is searching through the book, determined to find something that would work. She finds a section on greetings for knights, soldiers, military officials. One paragraph catches her attention.

Penny: Commonly used by knights and soldiers, can be used in both formal and informal occasions and between both higher and lower ranks. There are several variations amongst different social class due to the common use of the same gestures. It coneys a person’s strong spirit and kind heart due to the familiarly of the motions.

Penny, have had a spark of inspiration, close the book and hand it back to Whitley. This surprises Whitley and he returns his attention to the situation, focusing on Penny whose already walk back towards the ballet bar. When she’s at good distance from the mirror she smiles at her reflection then she straightens her stance, placed her right fist over the left side of her chest, and tilts her head a bit to the left and lifts the edge of her skirt with her left hand to add some flare.

Penny: Salutations. My name is Penny Polendina, it’s wonderful to meet you!......How was that?

Whitley is once again stunned by her actions. It was perfect, formal enough not to be leered at but still gave off the sweet non threatening demeanor they were looking for. He had thought this would take a few more days before any true progress was but she proven him wrong. He smirks then walks to her.

Whitley: That was very good Ms. Polendina. It’s just what we’re looking for, how did you come up with this?

Penny: I got from the sections on knights and soldiers, one of the greetings list was one for all occasions and had many variances amongst different classes so it seemed the more practical. So I used the stance and gesture from the knights pose then add some parts from young lady the variant to make it look gentler.

Whitley: Well aren’t you a clever one, you’ve done well today. And since you did so well you shouldn’t have may issues with your next lesson.

Penny: I promise I’ll do my best.

Suddenly a low ringing sound can be heard. Whitley reaches into his pocket and pulls out his scroll, it’s the schedule app notifying him that they’re time is up.

Whitley: It looks like we finished just in time, you need to get to the car soon or you’ll miss the train, Julia see her to the car.

Julia: Yes Young Master.

The maid Julia takes Penny’s things and walks to the door and opens it. Penny walks to the door and retrieves her belongings from Julia, thanks for holding on to her things for her.

Whitley: Have a good day Ms. Polendina.

Penny: Thank you, have a nice day. Oh! And if you have trouble sleeping chamomile tea with two teaspoons of honey can act as a sleep aid and help lower stress levels.

With that she leaves the room with Julia and Whitley is left alone. He leans against the ballet bar and smirks. That girl, and here he thought he might be wasting his energy on her but she proved him wrong. Not only had she been cooperative and pleasant, she had learned quickly, adopted to the situation and when a problem arose she found her own solution. Her execution of each augmented greeting was excellent despite not yielding the desired result and not once had she gotten frustrated or asks to take a break or quit all together. And to top it off she was worried about her instructor’s health and well being, Hmm what a hardworking student. Whitley gets another notification this time alerting him that he’s lessons starts in a few minutes. He puts his scroll away and heads off.

.

.

.

It’s almost sunset and Whitley has just finished the last of his daily tasks. He’s leaving the library and heading to his room when a butler blocks his way. He looks up at the butler Niles and stares at him indignantly.

Whitley: Evening Niles. What do you need from me?

Niles: Good evening Young Master. Master Jacques has called you to his study.

Whitley: (monotone) Wonderful.

Whitley turns around and begins walking towards Jacques’s office. After a few steps he notices Niles following behind him.

Whitley: I know the way to his study Niles, I don’t know to be shadowed.

Niles: Yes Young Master.

Niles bows then leaves, while Whitley heads towards his father’s study. After the long walk around the manor to Jacques’s study Whitley finally makes it to the study door. He knocks three times waits, after a few seconds Jacques gives him permission to enter. Whitley opens the door and steps inside where he’s greeted by the sight of his father sitting at his desk looking over documents.

Whitley: He’s still working , so this isn’t about punishment then. Good evening Father.

Jacques: Whitley.

Whitley: Niles said you called for me.

Jacques: Yes, I wanted an update on the military hound..

Whitley: Oh! Well, we just had our first lesson today and she did surprisingly well. She completely the lesson before the session ended and left for work immediately after.

Jacques: Hmm, any odd or suspicious behavior? Asking any invasive questions, looking around for documents?

Whitley: While she has shown some interest in things around the manor it’s been one of a child like curiosity. She looks at this place like a kid would a castle and besides being a little awkward and nervous she behaves fairly normal.

Jacques: That’s reassuring but still, keep an eye on her. She could just be waiting things until she makes her move.

Whitley: Yes Father. Will that be all?

Jacques: Yes that will be-Wait, one more thing.

Whitley: Yes?

Jacques: She needs to start going to events to investigate the suspects. I need you to find something soon so we can speed this deal up.

Whitley: Of course Father, I actually already have a few feelers and should have a suitable event earmarked in a few days.

Jacques: Hmm, As expected your always prepared. You can go now.

Whitley: Thank you Father, have pleasant evening.

Whitley exits the room let’s put a sigh of relief. He disliked being in his father’s study as he was only ever called there for a two reasons, one was to receive new orders or tasks and the other…..Whitley holds his left bicep and shutters. No… it would do him any good to think about that other reason right now. Right now he needs to focus on fulfill his new task, he takes out his scroll and continue his search hoping to find something before midnight. After an hour or so he stumbles upon something….promising.

[vicarfelix]

Honest Intentions

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Vicar Max x Fem. Reader

Warnings: Language. Smut.

A/N: GOD okay so I wrote this awhile ago and I cannot write smut to save my life. I suck so bad at it, I can’t ever seem to make it long enough, but this was so angsty good that I just couldn’t not post it.

Word Count: 2,155

“The question is, after all this, do you still trust me?”

__

If she had been in a cartoon, she was sure there would have been a gray, swirling cloud above her head to display her irritation. She couldn’t believe that he had lied to her. A lie. A betrayal of truth. A fib. A dishonest statement. And for what? Just to ensure his chances of her taking him to see some scholar that he didn’t even like? What was the point of that?

She never expected respect from her crew. She didn’t expect it from anybody. However, when she had earned the respect from someone, she expected full honesty in return. This was a total blow to her respect as a captain and trust as a girlfriend. She was unbelievably angry at him, confused even as of to why he wasn’t upfront about his desires. Truthfully, she was really hurt.

Max had lied in order to get her to take him to see Reginald. A former colleague of sorts of his that he needed to see to have his book translated from French. It wasn’t until they found Reginald that it became clear as of to how they even ended up there. Max claimed he couldn’t risk her not bringing him there to find him. He immediately sensed that she was upset. She had every right to be. The sickness in his stomach as a result of the guilt was a testament of that. She had convinced him to leave Reginald Chaney in one piece, refusing to let him lay a finger on him. They got what they needed out of him and left.

The silent trek back to the ship was seemingly everlasting. Her footsteps were heavy on the grounds of the Monarch wilderness as they returned back from Fallbrook. She needed some time to calm down and cool off before speaking to anyone. She was of no use to anybody being this upset. Last thing she wanted was to take her anger out of someone who didn’t deserve it. Max followed a bit further behind than usual, giving her as much space as possible without getting separated. No one said a word on the journey back to The Unreliable. Even Ellie didn’t even try to poke fun at the vicar who would be sleeping in his own quarters for now. It wasn't Max's reaction she was afraid of. It was the captain's.

They finally arrived at the ship long after nightfall, stars dotting the dark night sky. They would be spending the evening in route to Groundbreaker to get supplies and other materials in the morning. She entered the ship first, ADA greeting the returning space adventurers as always.

“Welcome back, Captain.”

She usually smiled in relief upon hearing her voice that signaled a safe return, but she was in no smiling mood. Everybody else had gone to their bunks for the night, which prompted Ellie to go as well. That left the captain and Max in the bay of the ship. The only sounds were the clanks and tinkers as she put away her belongings into the lockers. She couldn’t look at him. She was afraid that she just might lose it. He came up next to her, his voice low and quiet;

“Captain, I-”

“I don’t want to talk.”

He sighed. He wasn’t surprised at her response. He couldn’t figure out if she was speaking to him as his boss or his girlfriend...or both. She whisked away from the lockers and headed to the stairs leading up to her quarters. She just wanted to be alone for a little while and give this some serious thought. She planned on discussing everything with him in the morning. However she realized this was an impossible wish when he followed suit, desperate to get his message across to her;

“If nothing else, please know that I am sorry,” He pleaded, entering after his lover into her room; “I’m aware that I have put a lot of unnecessary stress on you today.”

She scoffed and shook her head incredulously. He didn’t seem to understand how the trust she had put in him had been seriously violated. That’s what made her more upset than anything. It was clear that he wasn’t leaving until this issue was resolved. So, she went off.

“You lied to me, Max. For personal gain,” she hissed; “I don’t like being lied to you.”

She was leaning against the frame of her bed, arms folded over her chest as Max was leaning against her desk. Her demeanor was tense and cold...not a pretty sight to see.

“I know. If it’s any consolation, I lied before I began to care for you...before I loved you. It wasn’t an attempt to break your faith in me.” He admitted.

A surge of energy went to her head, her cheeks heating with rage;

“That doesn’t make it any better. So, you didn’t lie to me as your lover? Fine. You still lied to me as your captain,” She snarled; “At the end of the day, Max, I am still your captain.”

He didn’t want to fight with her He didn’t want her to be angry at him. All he could do was continue to express his apology and hope she'd forgive him. He wasn’t lying when he said he cared about her. About how he loved her. The two of them had each said it once before, so she had to admit it made her heart beat a little faster hearing him say it again.

With this being said, he still had a rampant temper. Regardless of any situation, he didn’t like being talked to this way. He got defensive when others used an unpleasant tone with him. His pleading for forgiveness was beginning to mix with a sear of anger bubbling up in him.

“You are my captain, you will never witness me denying that. I don’t know what you wish for me to do other than tell you, honestly, that I’m sorry.” He replied, his voice getting rather scary; “But might I add that you weren’t so fucking honest at first either.”

All the blood in her body seemed to rush to her face and rapidly back down to her feet. She knew what he was talking about. The fact that the crew went months thinking she was actually Alex Hawthorne when she actually wasn’t. She hadn’t been upfront in the beginning and had lied about her identity. She would always feel a sense of culpability for that.

“I know that. I know that I didn’t tell anyone who I really was, but that was for the sake of my safety as well as everyone else’s. I lied because I had to,” She spat; “You lied for personal reasons. You lied to intentionally distress me and deceive me into doing something for you.”

He rolled his eyes dramatically and the veins in his arms were prevalent as he gripped the edge of the desk. He now felt like she was blowing this out of proportion.

“I wasn’t intentionally trying to hurt you. I would never do that,” He responded; “I lied because I didn’t think you’d take me all over Halcyon just to find some man that might have the answers I was looking for.”

She rubbed her temples with her fingers, feeling as if this conversation was going absolutely nowhere;

“That’s another thing,” She fired off; “What’s going to happen when we get to Scylla and the book gets translated? Will I no longer be of any use to you? Is this going to be over once you find what you're looking for?"

In an instant, his anger lifted and his heart seemed to stop at her words. She watched as a normal color returned to his face. His narrowed eyes and furrowed brows morphing into a softer, borderline concerned look. He stood from the desk and took the half step down from the desk to where she was standing. If there was one thing Vicar Max would never do, it would be that he would never lie about the way he felt about someone.

“Captain, darling, I wouldn’t ever lead you on that way. For any reason whatsoever.” He breathed out gently.

His sudden change in expression ultimately calmed her down as well. She sighed heavily as her judgement cleared. She knew why he really had lied. It wasn't to upset anyone. He had spent his whole life taking roads trying to find answers that ultimately led to a dead end. He was frustrated and disappointed. She could relate to that.

“I just want you to trust me. I want to trust you,” You admitted; “I would’ve taken you to him regardless of who he was. You didn’t have to lie.”

His hands cupped her face, she instinctively cocked her head to further rest her face in his hold.

“I trust you. I always have. I never intended for you to doubt how I feel, because I have been nothing but honest about it. I care about you and I love you.” He confessed; “The question is, after all this, do you still trust me?”

She did. 100% she trusted him. It would probably take a hell of a lot more than him lying about some sketchy prison dude to completely break her faith in him. However, she felt her devious side begin to bubble to the surface. She could totally use this situation to her advantage. Maybe she could get a little bit of a rise out of him in a positive way.

“I don’t know,” She said in an overly teasing tone; “I think a certain vicar is going to have to redeem himself somehow...”

His pupils dilated and his hands that had been by his sides were now slowly fumbling with the button and zipper on her pants.

“Is that so?” He purred in his captain’s ear; “I think I’ve got some ideas.”

In a matter of seconds, she was sprawled on the bed, pants discarded, and his kisses were hot on her neck. She moaned deliciously as his right middle and ring finger dragged across her heating sex, his left hand pinning her arms above her head

“Max...” She breathed out.

Oh, he loved when she said his name. It sent a fiery sensation all through his body. His strong, independent captain begging for him and only him. He was the only person who ever got to see her this way. She managed to break one of her hands free, reaching to unbuckle his own pants. However, he withdrew his hand and stopped her;

“This is all about you, Captain.” He growled.

His lips detached from her skin, he let go of her other arm as well and placed him face just in front of her. Her legs were draped over his shoulders as his tongue licked a heavy stripe and her desperate whimper filled the room. He sucked and kissed as one of her hands was steady on his head to prohibit him from going too far, while the other was pressed against the headboard behind her. It felt like electricity was crackling all through her body as he mercilessly pleasured her.

“Oh, fuck...you’ve got quite the mouth for a preacher,” She tried to laugh, but it came out as another moan.

Obviously this wasn't the first time she had ever been in this situation with him. But it still surprised her every time.

His chuckle vibrated against you, his voice muffled slightly;

“You better fucking believe it.”

He knew her backwards and forwards, which why he put his arm over her waist to keep her from squirming too much. He smirked as he felt her muscles contract against his hold. It was a damn hot sight to see. His face buried between her legs, his tongue and lips working wonders on the woman he adored so much. Normally, he’d hold off on letting her come undone. He’d slow his movements to tantalize her and make her beg. But she deserved what she wanted after today.

“Max, please...” She said feeling her legs begin to shake.

“I’ve got you, love.” He spoke.

Her head fell back onto the pillow as a flash of white covered her vision. Her legs tightened on his shoulders as she crashed over her high. He continued to suck her and work her through it. His name fell from her lips once more as she felt yourself settling back to normal. He grinned once her breathing attempted to slow, he returned to her side. She supposed that she owed him now, but that’d come later.

“Okay, yeah. I forgive you.” She huffed out once her heart slowed.

He laughed genuinely, falling onto the mattress and pulling her close. He was relieved that she was here with him now and that she hadn’t kicked him off her ship. He knew one thing for sure.

He would never lie to her again.

[whatareyousearchingfordean]

Happiness Begins

Part 15

Chapter Summary: The reader confides in a friend and gets a taste of Valentine’s Day with Jensen

Word Count: 3.6K+

Warnings: Language, suggestive comments

Author’s Note: I don't really have much to say here except thank you so much for your continued support. I love reading your reactions and thoughts, it gets me excited to finish writing. Words can't express my gratitude, xo Alex

Catch up with the series masterlist and check out Alexandra’s Library for more works by yours truly!

People were rushing down the street, umbrellas in hand or poncho’s over their coats. The rain was pouring in downtown Manhattan. As she watched them rush to wherever it was they had to be, she was thankful that her company had sent a car for her. It was the little things like no longer needing to ride the subway when in New York that she was still trying to get used to. As her company grew, they had been able to afford more and more of these little assets. Which today meant she didn’t have to rush to her photoshoot in the cold rain. It was a good reminder to count her many blessings in life. 

The studio was tucked on the corner, only a simple etching on the window to indicate what lay inside. Her driver rushed out of the car and helped her from the backseat, having somehow procured an umbrella without her noticing in his walk around the hood. He walked her to the door and promised to see her later that afternoon. 

“Ah, Miss Padalecki! Good to see you again.” The receptionist greeted her as she entered the industrially decorated studio. 

“You as well, Penny.” She nodded as Penny came around the front desk to guide her upstairs. The quiet bubble of the elevator burst into the chaos that was the set. There were people running around setting up computers and lighting. There were others setting up the lush greenery for the backdrop and doing other things she couldn’t quite make out.

“Food table is back there with various snacks and what not. In your dressing room is a mini fridge with water and juices. If you need anything else, just ask Kelsey, she is your assistant for today.” Penny indicated a young brunette over by the food. “Well, I’ll let you get to it.” 

Y/n muttered a thank you before disappearing into the large dressing room. There were racks of clothing hung about and lighted vanities on the far wall. She noticed the refrigerator that Penny had told her about. It was all a little overwhelming. This was her first time modeling for her line, hell it was her first time on a photoshoot set. All of the other ones she had just received the final shots to approve with her marketing team. 

“Y/n!” The squeal of her name had her spinning around, her eyes meeting a heavily pregnant Ashley.

“Oh, my! Look at you! How are you feeling?” She asked as she embraced the woman. 

“Like a whale. Everything is swollen and that pregnancy glow is only obvious to other people. I want to die.” Ashley placed her arm around Y/n’s shoulder and guided her to the couch. 

“Well, I think you look as amazing as ever. I know this will be a lot so I thank you for being here.” 

Ashley rolled her eyes before grinning at her. “I wouldn’t miss it for the world. Are you excited?”

“I’m nervous, being in front of a real camera is nerve wracking. I’m just glad that I get to have a pro here next to me.” Y/n crossed her legs and folded her hands in her lap as she answered honestly. She had done small ‘shoots’ for her instagram, but nothing on this level. Here she had an assistant for christ’s sake. Really, she was struggling to wrap her head around it.

“You’ll kill it, trust me.”

“I hope so.”

****

Her morning started out with wardrobe. They went through a few outfits that had been picked out and made sure everything fit properly. The way the clothes were hugging her curves had her wishing she took everything to a tailor. It would be something she would look into later. Then they were set down for hair and makeup. That was a whole other experience in of itself. She was definitely not used to being on the other side of a makeup brush in this context. In the end, it was a good time, getting pampered for once. She had someone teasing her hair when she got a text. 

I forgot how quiet it was around here before you showed up.

Jensen’s message had her smiling to herself. He was such a cornball sometimes. It was surprising to her at first, being one of those things that she didn’t expect from him. 

I haven’t even been gone 24 hours and you’re already missing me?

I miss you when I go home at night…

A small chuckle fell from her lips at his reply. Butterflies were fluttering in her chest at the simplest sentence. It was hard to deny to herself how hard she had fallen for him. And they had only been ‘seeing’ each other for about a month. The whole thing was exhilarating and terrifying at the same time. So much more than just her emotions were invested in this one.

“Is everything okay over there?” Ashley’s voice from the chair next to her snapped her from her thoughts. 

“Hmmm, yeah.” She had little luck controlling the stupid smile on her face and it did not go unnoticed by Ashley. 

“Alright,” She adjusted herself in her own chair so her whole body was turned towards Y/n. “Spill.” 

“Spill what?” Y/n tried to play it off, but the blood rushing to her cheeks was betraying her. 

“About what or who has you grinning like an idiot over there.” Ashley’s gaze flickered to her phone then back to Y/n, her eyebrows raised as she waited for an answer. Y/n’s gaze flitted to the women still messing with her hair and she bit her lip. Ashley followed her gaze and politely asked the women to leave them for a moment. 

Y/n took a deep breath, she figured she could trust her secret with Ashley. She knew better than anyone about keeping as much of a private life as you can. Besides, it wasn’t like she would ever have a conversation with her brother. “I’ve been seeing this guy.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah, and it’s been going well. He treats me great, he’s funny and he’s the biggest cheese ball I’ve ever met.” She explained, her grin growing even wider than it already was. Relief washed over her at being able to express to someone how truly happy she has been. 

“I sense a ‘but’ coming.” A look of concern washed of Ashley’s features. 

“I just… I can’t really talk to anybody about it, at least not yet. It’s still too new, we are still figuring each other out.” Y/n paused, her lips pursing as she thought about how to word this next part. “If anyone knew, it could be chaostrophic for both of us. There are people I don’t want to hurt if I don’t have to, ya know? If we don’t make it, I don’t want it to affect anyone but us.”

“It can’t be that bad?” She could see the gears turning in Ashley’s mind. 

“I don’t know how people are going to react, and if it’s bad, it doesn’t just affect me. It affects him too.” Ashley was silent as she mulled over her words. There really wasn’t anything else she could say to get Ashley to understand where she was without coming right out and telling her. And to be honest, right now, she could use a third party input. “I… I’ve been seeing Jensen.” Y/n squinted as she uttered her secret, bracing herself for Ashley’s reaction. 

“Ackles?” Y/n nodded, still timid. “Oh, well now I understand.”

“Are we being completely dumb?” Y/n was practically begging for her opinion at this point. 

“No, not completely. It’s obvious how happy you are, and if it’s going that well, then really, you owe it to yourself to be happy.” There was no judgement coming from her friend, which she was thankful for. Ashley’s words made her feel a little better about the path they were down right now. They just needed a little more time. 

“Thank you, really.” 

“No problem, now let’s go get some shots that’ll have him drooling.” She stood carefully, cradling her bump. Y/n laughed at her sudden change in demeanor. There was now way she would ever be able to repay Ashley for her help today, because to even quantify it would be impossible. 

“That’s actually a good idea.” Y/n chewed on the inside of her cheek as the idea brewed inside her head. She had wanted to share a few behind the scenes on her instagram already, so why not take a few extra to send to Jensen. 

“Okay, I don’t want to know. I’m just gonna go… somewhere else.” Ashley pointed over her shoulder and out the door before turning and heading out. 

Y/n did a few behind the scenes videos and posted them to her stories before heading over to the large mirror. Positioning herself in the light, Y/n draped the robe low on her shoulders and stuck her left leg out of the opening. Just enough skin was showing for Jensen to enjoy, but not enough to make it a full nude photo. She snapped a few photos before picking the best one to send to Jensen, a devilish smile on her lips.

****

Fake car lights continued to pass by behind the boy’s heads even after the director called cut. They were currently adjusting for sound before finishing the boy melodrama scene that would end the episode they were currently filming. Trish had her head stuck into the passenger window as she dabbed Jared’s face for shine. Jensen chuckled to himself as he thought about just how bad Jared tended to sweat, even when it was below freezing outside. 

The vibrating of his phone in his pocket stole his attention. He pulled it out and unlocked the screen without reading the notification. The picture filled most of his screen, throwing him off guard. A rough cough forced itself from his throat as his head nearly hit the roof of the impala. Jensen’s fingers flustered to close his messages when both Trish and Jared turned their heads towards him. 

“Dude, are you good over there?” Jared’s eyes were narrowed as he questioned him.

“Uh, peachy. I’ll be right back, I’ve gotta hit the head real quick.” Jensen leapt from the car, his phone secure in his fist as he rushed to the nearest bathroom. He was dialing her number before the door closed behind him. Y/n answered on the second ring. 

“Hey you.” Her voice was even, without a care in the world.

“That’s all you have to say? ‘Hey you’?” Jensen huffed, running a hand down his face.

“Okay, how about ‘I miss you too’?” She tried and Jensen could almost see the grin on her face. He shuffled around in the bathroom.

“That’s a little better.” Jensen was silent for a moment as he thought. “You know your brother was right next to me right?” 

“What? Oh god please tell me he did not see that. That’s probably the worst way he could find out about us.” The facade had dropped and Jensen could hear the sudden panic in her voice. 

“No, you’re good.”

“Well Jesus, Jensen, start with that next time.” She whined and Jensen smiled to himself. He had successfully gotten her back. 

“Consider it payback for the situation now in my pants that I can’t take care of till tonight.” Jensen absentmindedly adjusted himself in his jeans as he chastised her.

“If only there was someone there who could help you with that.” She purred, her voice dropping. Jensen cursed himself, she was so not helping him right now, but he suspected that was her angle. 

“Call you tonight?” He offered. She hummed in agreement. “Okay well I need to get back out there or they’ll think I’m pooping. And you need to get back to your shoot. Bye Lucifer.” 

Y/n snorted a laugh, her goodbye coming out between small laughs. “Bye Winchester.”

****

They were officially in the dead of winter. February always brought an interesting twist into the winter weather, this year bringing more snow to the great city of Vancouver than December and January combined. Y/n had officially had her fix. It was pretty to see every now and again, but for the life of her she couldn’t understand how people choose to live in these places. The secret was the natives didn’t know either.

The set was blanketed with the gross kind of snow today too. It was heavy and wet and only there to piss off people heading out for a long Valentine’s weekend. She envied them though, at least they were able to spend time with their significant other. Today, she was stuck at work until late. Stupid night shoots.

Her chin was tucked into her scarf as she headed for the makeup trailer. The heat inside enveloped her body as she entered, causing her to shiver in the sudden temperature change. Trish turned on her when she heard the door open. 

“Good morning grumpy.” Trish teased as she took in the frown on the bundled woman’s face.

Y/n frowned even more as she worked off her coat. “Only a few more weeks of this and then I can go home to some goddamn sunshine.” 

“That’s the spirit.” A small laugh accompanied Trish’s words before her face split into an even wider grin. “You got something this morning.” Trish tilted her head towards Y/n’s station. She had been so preoccupied that she hadn’t even noticed the large bouquet sitting in front of the mirror. Only it wasn’t your typical Valentine’s arrangement. It was a tiered vase filled with an array of succulents mixed with a little pink and white flowers that she didn’t know the name of. There was a tag hanging from the front that read ‘life would succ without you’. She reached for the card as she finished pulling off her hat and scarf and flipped it over. It had one last handwritten note followed by a drawn tiny heart, ‘To making it count’. 

“So, who is sending you flowers?” The look on Trish’s face told Y/n that she thought she was suddenly going to be in on some big secret. Jensen was smart though, making the card inconspicuous enough that she could play it off, while still throwing in a her favorite line from her favorite movie that she had forced him to watch with her. She had gone into one long monologue that night on why she loved that movie so much without meaning to. When she finished she was sure he was going to think she was bat shit crazy, but he was only grinning at her. Jensen told her how much he enjoyed listening to her talk about what she was passionate about. It was not something someone had ever told her before, and she was sure in that moment, no man would ever live up to Jensen Ackles.

“Uh, it’s from Ashley Graham. It’s a little joke from our photo shoot a few weeks ago.” She handed Trish the card and tried to keep her face as neutral as possible as she read it over.

“Oh, that’s really nice.” Trish handed her back the card and Y/n slipped it into her back pocket. “I thought maybe you had a secret boy toy sending you flowers.” 

“What?” Y/n nearly dropped her camera that she had begun to unpack. “Why would you think that?” 

Trish shrugged, doing little to hide the smirk on her face. “No reason. Well, except for the fact that you’ve been all smiley and happy the past few weeks, so I thought... you know…” 

“Yeah, I mean things have been really good with the business and dare I say it, spending time with my brother. I’m just happy.” Y/n hoped that her voice remained even as she tried to explain away her behavior. She hadn’t realized that everyone could see how down she was at the end of the year. And here she thought she had been keeping it together so well. 

“Okay…” Trish drew out the word and Y/n wasn’t sure she had her convinced. The door to the trailer popped open as Trish continued. “Are you sure you didn’t get laid?”

“Trish!” Jared and Jensen paused in the doorway, unsure of what they had just walked into. Trish failed in her attempts to hide her laughter as she went back to rifling through the makeup at her station. 

“I seriously do not even want to know.” Jared grimaced. He plopped down in his seat at Trish’s station. Jensen narrowed his eyes as Y/n turned, her face red, and went back to setting up her camera. “What’s with the camera, smalls?”

“Hmm? Oh, it’s for my channel. Your fans are greedy little buggers and they want to see what a day in my life on set is like. I got permission from the studio, I just can’t post the video until after this episode airs. Which is fine because it’ll probably take me that long to edit it anyway.” She explained as she hit the record button. Her doing Jensen’s makeup would make for a good montage later. Jensen sat down behind her, this time his one eyebrow raised. 

“Hey now, they are not greedy, they are passionate.” He defended the fanbase that they had come to know and love. 

“I meant no disrespect. I am one of those passionate fans, I just happen to have an exclusive in and I am choosing to share it with the rest of the family.” Y/n paused and bit her lip. “Before they hunt me down and kill me for it.” 

“Y/n, don’t you think that’s dramatic?” Jared was now trying not to laugh from his seat. 

“No, I don’t. It’s very easy to find basic public information on the internet, okay? Two seconds on the Travis County website and they can find all three of our addresses.” Mostly, she was kidding, but she wasn’t wrong. Some people didn’t have boundaries, and while she knew that the majority of the fans have much better things to do, she recognized that every tree had a few bad apples. 

“Alright, no more internet for you.” Jared teased, the rest of the group in the trailer joining in the laughter. 

“Laugh it up, but don’t come crying to me when they show up on your doorstep.” She sang as she began her work. Jared chose to ignore her, instead changing the subject and striking up conversation with Trish. 

Trish and Y/n had a little more work to do today than usual, needing to make up Jared and Jensen’s faces for a post fight scene. It meant some fun bruises and a couple of well placed cuts. The crew was bound to be in the holiday spirit today, which would make for some good footage for her video too. She only hoped it would help the day go by quicker. It sucked that it was Valentine’s Day and she couldn’t spend it with Jensen. Sure it was a stupid Hallmark holiday, but that was all part of it’s charm. Being stupid and gooey and love sick with your significant other. But she had to spend the whole day sitting in an uncomfortable chair, waiting for the director to call cut so she could fix Jensen’s makeup every now and then. It was moments like these that she wished that they could just be a normal couple. 

“Meet you in wardrobe?” Jared smacked Jensen’s shoulder a little too hard, jumbling the man and causing Y/n to mess up the line she was making. 

“Jared, he’s not meeting you anywhere if you keep messing up my work.” Y/n hissed, spinning around to grab a tissue. 

“Sorry, smalls.” He flashed his sister a sheepish smile as he followed Trish out of the trailer. Y/n dabbed the tissue into a little bit of water and wiped away the mistake on Jensen’s cheek. 

“So,” Y/n jumped as Jensen’s fingers met the inside of her thigh. “You’re… you’re getting laid?” He grinned up at her as his fingers danced further up her thigh. 

“Mmm.” Y/n hummed in response, fighting the grin that threatened to split across her face.

“Anyone I should be worried about?” 

“Um, probably. According to Trish I’ve been super smiley lately.” She grinned as she finally met his stare. 

“Huh… This guy must really know what he’s doing then.” His fingers danced up and down her leg some more as he waited for her answer. 

“God, yes.” Y/n moaned, rolling her eyes back in her head for dramatic effect. She made quick work of fixing Jared’s mistake, patting Jensen’s cheek lightly when she finished. 

“All done?” He asked.

“Yes sir.” Y/n stepped back as he stood up. He towered over her, pushing her back until her butt hit the counter. His hands came up to cup her jaw, his one thumb tugging her lower lip out. 

“Did you like the flowers?” He asked, his voice low.

“I love them, especially since they will last longer than three days.” She giggled. He had chosen well, giving her something that she could keep for a while, so long as she remembered to water them. “Oh, and I got something for you.” Y/n chirped, spinning around to search through her bag. It didn’t take long for her to find what she was looking for and she was back facing Jensen. She held up the large bag in her hand, dangling it in front of his face.

“Holy crap, that has to be the biggest bag I’ve ever seen! Where do you even find one this size?” Jensen chuckled, taking the monstrous bag of gummy bears from her. 

“I have my ways.” She assured him, not willing to disclose her secret. Jensen leaned into her, ghosting his lips across hers before kissing her slowly. “Happy Valentine’s Day.” 

“Happy Valentine’s, Jay.”

Part 16

Forevers: @spn-impala​​ @22sarah08​​ @turtlepad​​ @callmekda​​ @chaldei​​ @hobby27​​ @casualfestivaltrashpainter​ @cowboysnwinchesters​​ @tranquility-or-chaos​​ @pikabootoyouchu​​ @dawnie1988​​ @grease222​​ ​ @awesome-badass-cafeteria-sauce​​ @polina-93​​ @clarinette07​​ @moonlight-babeh​​ @suckerforfanfic​​ @witandnargles​​ @sleepylunarwolf​ @stiles-stilinski-24-dylan​ @geeksareunique​ @akshi8278​

Et Cetera: @jbbarnesgirl​ @hillface89​ @arses21434​ @thevelvetseries​ @sslater34​ @mrsirishboru​ @smoothdogsgirl​ @spnfamily-j2​ @encounterthepast​ @facadeformyrealblog  @supernatural-bellawinchester​ @screechingartisancashbailiff​​ @rebeccathefangirl​ @squirrelnotsam​ @heartinmyhead1​ @1d-killed-me​ @samsgirl93​ @deans-baby-momma​ @deanmonandnegansbitch​ @woodworthti666​ @supraveng​ @onethirstyunicorn​ @heartsaved​ @know2grow​ @littlewhiterose​ @surprisinglysarah​ @stoneyggirl​ @carryon-doctor-lock​ @thebookisbtr​ @youaremyfiveever​ @kalesrebellion​ @lilulo-12​ @winchester-fantasies​ 

[botwstoriesandsuch]

Hey so I wanna start writing botw fanfiction of my own, and I was curious if you had any tips for writing for this fandom?

I don’t know what gave you the impression that I am qualified to give advice, but I will try!

If you have the game, I find it helpful to actually go to the places in Hyrule that you’re writing about, so you can get a sense of what everything looks and sounds like, and even gather context clues of what it smells and feels like. Plus, to make sure the tone of my whole fic is consistent, I usually put up music from the BOTW OST or whatever music fits. Then I couple it with the website A Soft Murmur for any other world building sounds, like fire, wind, rain, birds, or whatever

You can use the website Guide of the Wild to find any other details whether on the map or compendium if you don’t have the game. And just searching up images or gameplay works too

Take advantage of the great world of botw to pace your dialogue! My biggest struggle (and pet peeve that I can fall into myself) is dialogue pacing. Sometimes it’s appropriate to write blocks of text for context or exposition purposes, but for regular banter I always like to put a few sentences in between to flesh out the actions and scenery. This person says that, as the wind blows their hair into their face. That person responds, while running their fingers on the morning dew caught on the blades of grass. Stuff like that

Sometimes I’m tired of switching between the character’s name and “he/she/they” so to spice it up, I use “The Zora” or “The Hylian” (etc. etc.) as an alternative. Although, this only works if you’re working with two different races, and it ultimately depends on how your fic flows

Do the characters that you’re most familiar with or you feel you understand the most. Don’t feel obligated to shove Zelda in just because they hang out with Link, if you don’t know how you’ll use her. Unsure of how to write for Sidon? Then don’t! I promise you that a fic is 102% better when you write two characters really well, rather than shoving in a few popular ones for the heck of it. It’s you world, do what you want.

More under the cut:

Then again, if there’s no way around it and you need to write for a character and you don’t know, first I’d rewatch all cutscenes with them on youtube. If that doesn’t give you ideas, try the Creating a Champion book (There is a free pdf online, and it’s also great for references and research/world building in general) and if you can’t get anything from that, just search up headcanons and fics about that character from other good works. Luckly, most of Nintendo characters are crafted around a simplistic trait, and are made more complex off of that starting point. Sidon is kind supportive shark prince, Revali is an asshole with a heart of gold, etc, etc, so just build off of whatever character traits you have. 

And again, you’re the one writing the fic, so honestly you could write them however you want. Write for yourself first, rather than writing to appeal to canon

Dialogue has so much room for characterization and take advantage of it, especially for Nintendo characters because again, they’re usually written around a central character trait. Revali uses long, complex words to show off, Mipha is typically more soft spoken and polite. So did your character “say” something? Or did they “enunciate their words,” or maybe they “whispered tentatively while avoiding their gaze.” Did they say “That’s great,” or did they say “Extraordinary! Fantastic! Truly this is a marvelous event!” Or maybe they said “Who would have thought? I certainly didn’t expect something so monumental coming from you.” 

I don’t even have to say the characters but you know instinctively what kind of characters were speaking for those last two, just from the connotation and diction alone. Use that! Use your word choice to convey character!!

Now this might just be the screenwriter in me speaking, but I usually frame my scenes using the upside-down triangle method. LFTS explains it really well in this video, and you should just follow them in general. (Also the youtube channel hello future me has some fantastic videos on writing so follow them too!)

Anyhow, the upside-down triangle or funnel method is basically the principal that the first line of a scene establishes the broad premise that the scene moves around, and the last line of the scene establishes the point and purpose. (Now this doesn’t really work that well for one-shots on cute fluff or whatever, and it’s more of your multi-scene things, but there are a few things you can still apply!) 

It doesn’t have to be your literal first line or last line, but essentially it breaks down into a question and an answer. The first part of a scene should establish a question, and the stakes. Why are your character’s here? What do they hope to gain? What is preventing them from such? What is there to lose? Then the scene ends with the funneling point, purpose, or answer. At the end of the scene, they realize their feelings despite the obstacles, or they decide they have to go rescue someone, or maybe nothing about their attitude changes at all, despite of something.

See using this method I’m able to focus on the purpose of a scene, I can frame my dialogue and banter to establish characterization and motives easily. I can make sure that every detail and action serves to further the scene’s ultimate goal. I can pace everything to my liking, to make things more dramatic, tense, or comforting, and I can cut out anything that isn’t needed

When you follow this, it makes the payoff, the resolution, or the tragedy all the more satisfying. This kiss is all the better when it’s framed as the perfect funnel point after a scene centered around the premise of their pining, or banter. The angst hurts all the more when your entire scene is focused on building tension and growing insults that dance around the question of “why?” Scenes should either move towards, or away from a certain goal or point. If nothing changes, if it affects nothing, and it doesn’t add to world or character building, scrap it.

Also write your scenes out of order if you must! You have all those great ideas for dialogue and cute fluff or whatever, but you’re not at that point yet? Write it down!! You will forget, and you will regret it. Write the entire ending if you must, even if you haven’t finished the first scene. In fact, you should actually do that because again, the funnel/upside-down triangle method means that the ending is a very important part. So yeah, when you get that idea just write it in the margins, don’t stop the flow of your brain!

I act out my scenes. It’s stupid but it works for me. I say the words outloud as I talk down to the dishwasher. This way I can also get a sense of the body language, whether it be for Revali, speaking to someone with his wings tucked behind his back, or Sidon who always expresses his gratitude with grandeur arm motions!

And I keep using Revali and Sidon as examples because foils!!! Botw characters are so perfect for foils oh my gosh. Foil your characters, please. If you’re using a side character it’s so great if they are also a foil. I already mention Revali and Sidon being opposites, but similar things can be done with Yunobo and Link, or Zelda and Mipha. Foils don’t mean that an entire character is the opposite of another, just a certain trait. Teba and Revali are similar in their attitudes, but still work as foils when talking about Revali’s flamboyancy to Teba’s stoic and grim demeanor. 

Final point, if you didn’t enjoy writing it, if you wrote to please someone other than yourself, you did it wrong.

[lunnamars]

Hello! I heard you wanted prompts ~~ "winter" with Ichiruki please?

Oh hello! So, although IchiRuki is my otp and forever will be, it's been a while I haven't actually read anything about them and there's the fact I have never written anything related to mah pretty babies. Actually, it turned out a little bigger than I expected, but well, I hope you like it! :) 

Ah, a quick reminder that English is not my first language, so forgive me for my mistakes. 

The cold had never been a problem to Kuchiki Rukia, which meant that the winter would never freeze her. After all, she's cold and snow herself. But the loneliness and the melancholy of that particular season had always affected her.

And there was something about the winter of those 17 months she spent locked in Sereitei and away from Karakura Town that had left her frozen inside. And even after all was said and done, when Ywach was gone and he and the others had gone back to his mundane life, she still felt kind of cold.

It has been a year she hasn’t seen him. And it was really fucking cold.

Rukia doesn’t know actually why she had not followed him through the Senkaimon to his world and why she still prevents herself from going to visit him and his family. Karin and Yuzu must be bigger now and way smarter than their thickheaded brother. Their father probably is still the same and she hoped he was, Rukia has always been very fond of him.

He probably was in his first year of college and she is happy for him. Rukia just wanted to tell him herself.

And when the snow is falling and the winds of winter are freezing her bones, she longed to talk to him. She really wanted to hear his voice, he's her best friend, for fuck's sake! Her partner in crime, her ride or die, the one who could actually make this cold go away. 

Rukia knows she had decided to stay, it was not his fault. She decided to stay because her life was actually there, in Seireitei and he deserved a normal life — that's what Rukia has always believed and he knows that. So she stayed behind and started to train harder than before so she could become the next Captain of the 13th Division. In all honesty, she did want to continue the legacy of Ukitake and Kaien, Rukia wanted to guide those people under her command. 

But she also wanted to be with him. 

Why the hell didn't she follow him? Why the hell didn't he ask her to go with him? Why the goddamn fuck did she tell him he should go, so he could still have the life he should have, and that she should stay?

Those 17 months were one of the hardest, with summer or winter. 

She heard from Renji that Inoue finally got to go out on a date with him and that did not sit well with Rukia. It left a bitter taste in her mouth, but she was somewhat happy for her friend.

But did he enjoy it? How did he feel? What was he thinking? She really wanted to know, like the old times. Maybe he wouldn’t tell her, but Rukia knew that just a look into his eyes would tell her everything. That's how they are. And she's pretty sure that if he walked through the doors of the Kuchiki mansion (in this goddamn cold) right now, she would still know him. Like, really know him.

Rukia had no words for the hell they were — just friends, best friends? Lovers? Something that transcends the ordinary idea of lovers? Soulmates?

She did not care. She just wanted to see him, give him a quick hug and then kick him, hear his voice, tell him that it doesn’t matter who he was hooking up with, she'd always be by his side because Rukia had lived a long and lonely life after death and he was the one who changed everything. 

The only thing she was sure it was that there have always had some unmistakable glint in her eyes when she looked at him and Rukia is a closed person, but he would forever break through her walls, baring her soul.

It was fucking cold, the winter was unforgiving this year and she missed him. 

To hell this idiocy of mine, stop being a goddamn coward, Rukia.

"Byakuya-ni-sama, I'll be off for two or three days, but don't need to worry about me", Rukia walks into her brother's office and says, absentminded while reading some reports. She has made her decision, but Kuchiki Rukia does not neglect work.

"I don't think that will be necessary, Rukia", comes the deep voice of her brother.

"What— why—"

And she stops midsentence and dead on her tracks. Her eyes widen and her heart actually skips a lot of beats.

"Ichigo."

"Yo, midget",  he smirks and suddenly, Rukia could not hear the wild winds of winter.

"Well, as I'm sure I'm not needed here, I'll let you both talk in private", Byakuya says with his usual stern demeanor.

Rukia is speechless (and for the record, she is never speechless) and barely pays attention to her brother's departure. He's here. Why are you here?

"Because I was a dumbass a year ago", he mumbles with his everyday frown. She had missed that too. But the fact he basically had read her mind didn’t go unnoticed by her. "I shoulda stayed with you."

She blinks and swallows hard. Rukia wanted to hear that so badly a year go. Heck, she still wanted to hear that, but her instinct to protect him always kicks in and always will if they ever meet again in another life. "No, you shouldn’t have. Ywach's words were not meant to be taken lightly, you moron."

Is it weird that she missed calling him a moron?

"You're unbelievable. I don’t see your sorry ass in a whole fucking year and the first thing you call me is moron?", he was fuming and she sneered.

"Haa… did you expect me to jump right to your skinny arms?", she raised an eyebrow, mocking him all the while.

"Hey!! My arms are not skinny anymore!", he poked her head really hard.

And then Rukia kicked him. Just like she wanted. But Ichigo was Ichigo and he didn’t even let her savor the moment, their moments of the good old days — he grabbed her wrist and pulled her closer. It was so easy for him to tower over her, especially when he catches her off guard, both things never ceased to make her feel somewhat fragile and protected at the same time. It made no sense in her head. 

Then he muttered, “I was a dumbass. I really was.”

And she responded in the same tone, “Me too.”

Rukia knew she already had the distinct spark in her eyes that only Ichigo was able to spurt out of her. It has been a year and he still does the same thing to her, he’s still completely effective against her — the smirk, the softness in his eyes, his unquestionable handsome features.

Those 17 months were the worst of my life, I’m sure of it. The worst winter, I was cold all the time.

But Rukia is stupid sometimes and always so so worried about him and she suspects she forever will. So she blurts, "Inoue is better for you."

Hurt dances in his eyes and a twist of his mouth scream to her how disappointed he was. But Ichigo never backs down, no, not Ichigo. Just a look into his eyes and expression and Rukia knows why he was there. After all, she had said before and will say it again — they know each other so well that it seems almost some kind of witchcraft someone cast on them in another life.

He pulls her closer, really close, and one hand is around her waist and she’s trapped, almost giving in—

"I don't want to be with Inoue", his tone is final, certain.

Then Rukia whispers with a trembling voice as if she doesn’t believe a word that was flying out of her mouth, "Inoue can give you so much more."

"I don't want whatever she can give me."

Ichigo leans in her brother’s desk behind him and they were almost on the same height. He was too tall and she was too short, so she rarely had the chance to be that close to his face to the point of drowning in his brown eyes, see clearly how he had marks from frowning so much and his well-shaped mouth.

He looked frantically at her, orbs moving fast, piercing her own big eyes, expecting some reaction from her. 

I don’t want to be cold anymore. I wanna go home.

"That'd never work. I'm literally a ghost, stupid boy. And you have an entire life ahead of you. Why waste your life with someone who's already dead?", she starts stumbling over her words and her expression was pleading for him to understand, it was almost pitiful, full of the longing of a whole freaking year. “Besides, what about Yhwach? I know I’m assuming you’d be happy with this predicament, but—”

Now he was truly close, looking at her lips, seeming to not listen to a word that was leaving her mouth; deciding, in the end, to swallow her pleas and doubts, “Then I’ll fight him again and again and again.”

Ichigo mumbled in her mouth and then she comes undone when he rests his hand in the back of her neck, his lips meeting hers. They had never kissed before, but somethings stirs inside her, some old memory and then she’s not frozen anymore. Any argument she had, dies in her throat, dies with her gasp and with her eyes closing ever so slowly, dies with Ichigo flushing her body to his, locking and embracing her, with the intensity of a year apart. 

She finds usage for her hands, resting one on his back — feeling the muscles, the spine, everything — and the other gripping his shirt with all the longing she had inside her. Then she had no idea how, didn’t even see it coming, but his tongue found hers and he tilts her head slightly, kissing with all the fierceness he possessed and Rukia caught her breath. With every nip of her lip and any tease of his tongue, he’s asking her to choose him. 

Asking her to stay with him. 

Like she had any control when it comes to Ichigo. So her answer overflows with every bite on his lips, with her hands running up and down his back, with the soft moan she let it slip. 

They part an eternity later so Ichigo could rest his forehead on hers, both panting for breath and she had never felt warmer in her life — no cold and lonely winter is able to break her now. He whispers again, his mouth brushing against hers, "You don't want it to work, Rukia?"

She closes her eyes and mutters, “I don’t want you to die, Ichigo. Everything I did from the moment we met was to make sure you wouldn’t die.”

“Please, Rukia”, a kiss, “It was really hard—”, another kiss, “to keep up with the speed of the world on those 17 months”, a tug on her lips, “Don’t do that to me again.”

“Ichigo—”, she whimpers.

"Let me stay. Please, midget."

Another kiss.

"Are you trying to convince me by kissing me?", she scoffed.

He decided to leave her lips and trail her jawline with slow-dive kisses, then basically purred in her ear, "I don't know, is it working?"

She could feel his smirk. Bastard.

Rukia rested her head on his temple and whispered with the affection she normally keeps to herself, "I want you to stay."

He stops kissing her and holds her tight in his arms, resting his head on her shoulder. "I missed you, you know? It was raining too much already", he says in a strange strained voice.

She answers with one of her own, but with sincerity, "Me too. The winter was almost unbearable, Ichigo."

He moves away just enough to look at her and then has the audacity to grin at her face after so many confessions, "So… is that an order, Captain Kuchiki?"

"I'm still not a Captain, Ichigo!"

"But you will be, so might as well start training", he shot her his lopsided smile that always lets her wondering how someone was not able to fall for it. She did, but no way in hell she would tell him.

She puts her hand in her chin and actually considers his suggestion, Ichigo just laughed. "Mmm, from that point of view, I guess you're right", then she arches an eyebrow and says in a mocking tone, "That's a first, huh."

Ichigo presses his lips in a thin line and she was almost sure there is a vein pulsing in his forehead, "Oe, you damn shorty—"

Before he finally snaps, she dives in and steals another breathtaking kiss and decides that she loved to hear him gasp. In the end, he had convinced her and she knew danger would always be lurking around, hunting them, trying to tear them apart, to sever their red thread, but Ichigo said he'd fight over and over again. So she'd do the same, over and over again.

"Just shut up and stay, Kurosaki."

Winter will never freeze her again.

[therainroguefanfiction]

🏐 Dislike; Takanobu Aone (Sportember #021)

📑 Table of Contents | ⚾ Challenge Post

Genre: School, Fluff, Slice of Life

Word Count: 2,466

Pairing: Reader x Aone

World: Haikyuu!!

Prompt: “I dislike sports.”

Sport: Volleyball

Author’s Note: This is my first time writing for Date Tech so I have no idea if I got their personalities right but hopefully it’s okay! ^~^)/

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The first time Aone ever saw you was when you appeared at their volleyball practice one afternoon, searching for the timid captain, Moniwa. While you appeared attractive to him, he didn’t pay you much mind, far more invested in volleyball than dating. Still, you were intriguing to him, often keeping to yourself or speaking with the captain.

After seeing you that first afternoon, he started to notice you more around the school, even seeing you a couple of times on your way home. And for some reason, he found himself watching you more than he was willing to admit, observing the way you interacted with the world around you and how you avoided the people because they annoyed you. It wasn’t long before he had learned all of your ticks and habits.

You only came to practice a hand full of times and even then, you rarely interacted with the other members of the team, though you didn’t ignore them if they spoke to you, which they rarely did simply because they had no reason to. Aone, on the other hand, really did want to speak to you, to get to know you better, but he was far too shy to attempt it. What would he even say?

Futakuchi was the only one that noticed the longing glances he sent your way on those rare occasions that you joined them. He tried to convince the larger male to just say hi to you, but he refused, going back to practice while trying to act as if he weren’t sneaking glances at you. He knew that once the third years left the team to focus on their studies, you would stop coming around, as well, so he decided to fix this.

“Hey, captain?” Futakuchi approached the shorter male, his hand on his hip.

“What is it?” Moniwa tilted his head curiously.

“Can you ask Y/N-senpai to come to practice tomorrow?”

“Eh? What for?”

“I’d like to get to know them,” he responded with a bright smile, hands held behind his back. “They seem really cool.”

“Hm, I doubt they’ll agree, but I’ll certainly ask,” the captain returned the smile.

“Thank you~”

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“Hah? Why would I do that?” You questioned before stuffing some rice into your mouth, staring lazily at your childhood friend.

Moniwa was sitting at the side of your desk with his lunch in front of him. “Because I’m your friend and you love me?” He pouted, poking your hand with his chopsticks. “You’ve been before.”

“That doesn’t make it any less boring,” you rolled your eyes. “I only ever attend practice when your mom comes to pick you up.”

“And here I thought you came to watch me because you wanted to support me,” he frowned.

“Me being there won’t make you improve in any way and we see each other every day. I definitely only went so I could hitch a ride with your mom.”

“Would it help if I told you that my team thinks you’re cool?” He quirked a brow before taking a bite of his lunch.

“Why? I’ve barely said five words to any of them.”

“No clue, but they asked me to ask you to stop by this afternoon.”

“Sounds boring.”

“I’ll buy you a soda.”

Your eyes suddenly lit up and you sent him a serious look. “I’ll see you there.”

He sweatdropped at your sudden change of demeanor, but he was happy to have gotten you to agree. He could only hope that you would be respectful to his team and not start an argument with them.

━━━━━━༻🎾_🏀_🏐༺━━━━━━

Futakuchi was the first person to notice you when you stepped into the gymnasium that afternoon, a bored look on your face as you sipped from a can of your favorite soda. The captain was at your side, talking excitedly about something that had happened to him in class, but you weren’t really paying him any attention.

The brunette tapped the white-haired second year on the arm before nodding toward you. “Y/N is here.”

Aone’s eyes snapped toward you, his pale cheeks dusting with pink, but he said nothing, simply nodding before returning to his pre-practice stretches.

“You should talk to them,” he encouraged. “You know they’re not gonna come here anymore once the captain leaves the team.”

Aone frowned at the thought, but he knew he would still see you around the school, at the very least.

Futakuchi rolled his eyes, sensing the boy’s thoughts. “You have the perfect opportunity to talk to them right now.”

“I don’t know what to say,” he responded softly.

“You could start with ‘hi’,” the brunette grabbed the taller boy’s jersey before tugging him over to where you had settled down on the bench, playing a mobile game on your phone. “Y/N, hello!”

You glanced up at the two before returning your gaze to the screen. “Hello.”

“Thank you for coming to support us, it means a lot,” he smiled brightly, nudging the taller boy in the ribs.

Aone swallowed the lump in his throat, body tense as his face heated up. “T-Thank you, senpai…”

You looked up at the sound of his deep voice, making him snap his gaze to the side, unable to look you in the eye. It was the first time you had ever heard him speak and, while it didn’t come as a surprise that his voice was deep, you could appreciate how calming his tone was. “I haven’t even done anything.”

“Being here boosts our morale!” Futakuchi explained, holding his index finger up. “It also gives us more motivation to win. You must be super busy, but you still come to support us when you can.”

You scoffed at the implication, amusement dancing in your eyes as you looked at him. “Sorry to burst your bubble, but you’re wrong. I’m not busy at all and I don’t come here to support you.”

The two boys exchanged a confused look.

“I dislike sports,” you told them with a shrug. “They’re incredibly boring and I don’t see the point behind them. I don’t come here to support you guys, I only come here so Kaname’s mom can take me home with them so I don’t have to walk.”

Aone’s eyes widened in surprise at the confession. You didn’t like sports? As someone whose whole life was surrounded by volleyball, he couldn’t understand the sentiment and, more importantly, he doubted a relationship could work between you. Even if you liked him back, how could he be with you knowing you didn’t like sports? How could you be with him knowing he was obsessed with sports?

Futakuchi on the other hand, just sent you a look somewhere between disbelieving and annoyed, glancing at his captain. And here he thought you came because Moniwa asked you to.

You noticed this and chuckled. “Don’t worry, he knows already. We can still be friends and not support each other’s hobbies, you know.”

“So… you hate sports then?” He questioned, glancing at the taller male but, aside from the light dusting of color upon his cheeks, his face did not betray what he was feeling.

“I wouldn’t go that far,” you responded, propping your chin in the palm of your hand. “To me, sports just don’t exist.”

Aone’s body slumped forward a bit, shoulders drooping as he lowered his head to cover his eyes in shadow.

“And if you dated someone that played sports?”

Your brow raised at the question. “Are you trying to say something, Futakuchi?”

He glanced at the taller male again and you followed his gaze, tilting your head to the side. “Not at all~ I’m simply curious.”

You took in Aone’s dejected expression and the body language he was presenting and you realized something important. With a hum, you sent the brunette an amused look. “I wouldn’t be able to answer that until I experienced it. Guess I’ll just have to wait for someone who likes sports to ask me out, then I’ll let you know.”

Aone didn’t like the thought of someone else asking you out, but he certainly didn’t feel confident enough to be the one to ask you.

“What the hell are you two doing?” Kamasaki scowled at the two from across the court. “Stop socializing and get to work!”

Futakuchi rolled his eyes at him. “It’s rude to interrupt, you know.”

“Hah?” His eye twitched at the disrespectful tone the younger boy used. “What did you just say?!”

“Are you deaf or something?” The brunette smirked, not even flinching when the older boy stomped over, getting into his face.

“Stop being a disrespectful little shit and get to practice!”

“Or what?”

“G-Guys, please…” Moniwa looked between the two boys before turning to Aone with pleading expression. The second year understood, giving a small nod before inserting his large body between the two boys, using his hands to push them apart.

Their arguing was giving you a headache so you stood up and left the gym, heading for the vending machines that sat outside the locker room. As badly as Aone wanted to follow you, he stayed put, following his team back onto the court.

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You yawned loudly as you leaned against the fence surrounding Date Tech. The sun was gone, the sky a deep velvet with stars dotted across it like flecks of glitter. It was getting late now, tiredness settling into your bones. Why the hell were they practicing so damn late? It made no sense to you. Even the coach had already left the school.

You were beginning to consider just going home, but you had always been a stubborn person, so you stayed put, eyes narrowed in the direction of the school as you continued to wait. The manager was the first person you saw, quickly followed by three other members, all of whom you couldn’t be bothered to remember the names of. They smiled at you politely as they passed by, but you were too tired to return the gesture.

Finally, after ten more minutes of waiting, Futakuchi rounded the corner with Aone at his side, the latter remaining quiet as the brunette rambled on about one thing or another.

When Aone’s eyes met yours, he stopped in his tracks, eyes widening a bit. He was sure you had gone home already, so why were you waiting by the gate? Were you waiting for Moniwa who was still in the locker room with his vice captain?

“Oh, Y/N,” Futakuchi tilted his head. “What you still doing here?”

You hummed tiredly, your gaze flickering to the tall boy. “Who knows.”

“Well if you don’t know, we certainly don’t,” he scoffed before continuing on past you.

Since you lived in the same direction, you pushed away from the fence and started after him, pausing to look back at Aone who hadn’t budged. “You coming?”

“A-Ah, yes.” His cheeks burned as he took a few long strides, easily closing the distance between you, his pace slowing down when he was finally at your side. Every once in a while, your hand would brush against his, sending heat rushing to his face. He wanted to reach out and grasp your hand in his, but when he considered how you might react, he didn’t like the scenarios his brain conjured up.

“I’m surprised you’re not waiting for the captain,” Futakuchi commented, glancing over his shoulder. He didn’t miss how close the two of you were walking.

“Why would I? His mom isn’t picking him up today so I’d just be walking home even more tired than normal. Sounds like a pain to me.”

He snickered. “You’re not a very good friend, are you?”

“Never said I was.”

With a hum, the brunette pulled his phone from his pocket and suddenly gasped dramatically. “I forgot to pick up my sister! Gotta go!”

Your brow quirked up as the second year took off down the street. You didn’t even know him and even to you, that was obviously a lie. He wanted to the two of you to be alone together, that much was obvious. This only confirmed your suspicions that Aone might have feelings for you.

“Hey, Aone?”

“Yes, senpai?” He questioned softly, hand tugging at the strap of his bag as he did his best to keep his gaze forward.

“Does he actually have a sister?”

He hesitated, wondering if he should rat out his friend, but he didn’t like the idea of lying, especially not to you. “He doesn’t…”

“Knew it,” you snickered, turning your amused gaze to the tall boy. “Do you like me, Aone?”

The second year stopped dead in his tracks, face turning the shade of a cherry as the words reverberated around his brain. Had he really been that obvious? His lips parted, but no sound escaped him.

You observed him for a moment. “Just be honest with me.”

His eyes met yours and it felt like his heart was practicing for the Olympics. When he finally managed to speak, his voice was soft, not fitting his appearance at all. “I… l-like you…”

“I see,” you hummed, stepping in front of him with a grin. “Tell me something. Are you curious about my answer when it comes to dating someone that’s into sports?” Aone hesitantly nodded. “Good, because I’m curious too. Let’s find out together, shall we?”

The thought made his breath hitch, a soft smile coming to his lips despite the redness of his cheeks. “I would – would like that… senpai.”

“Good,” you grinned, slipping your hand into his own large one before tugging to get him to start moving again. His fingers laced with your own on instinct, hoping that you couldn’t feel how clammy his skin was. “You can just call me Y/N if you want. I don’t really care.”

“Y/N,” he breathed out, testing the name on his tongue. He liked the way it felt, even if it was a bit embarrassing to him. “Will you…”

“Hm?”

“A-Ah, it’s nothing…”

You chuckled, giving his hand a squeeze. He was so easy for you to read. “Yes, I will come to your game tomorrow.”

His lips slid upward as warmth filled him at the thought of you coming to cheer him on even though you didn’t find any enjoyment in sports. “Thank you.”

“You really are so cute,” you commented with a smile, biting back a laugh when his cheeks darkened again, his head shooting to the side to try and hide his embarrassment.

While it’s true that you didn’t like sports and found them to be so very boring, you felt hopeful that it would be more bearable now that you had someone to focus your attention on. A small part of you was looking forward to the match, to seeing the tall boy in action.

━━━━━━༻🎾_🏀_🏐༺━━━━━━

[ymiwritesstuff]

Hello again, is it possible for a continuation of Gyro's sister x Diego? Like where they actually get to Rocky Mountain Village and [Name] sees Diego acting strange? If not, that's alright. You're an amazing writer and do not let other people tell you otherwise.

Thank you so much once again! I really hope you enjoy this as it was once again extremely fun to write.

Strange Behavior

Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure Part 7: Steel Ball Run

Diego Brando x Gyro’s Sister!Reader

Summary: The journey continues as planned but things soon take an unexpected turn as you run into Diego once again

Notes: Suggestive language, light swearing

This is a continuation of Just a Little Scheme please read that one first to understand the context better

The journey the next day had continued normally, albeit with slight feelings of boredom from your side, due to the lack of Diego’s presence. The events of the previous night were still fresh within your mind and you could practically still feel the blond’s lips on yours. Deep thoughts of Diego made it hard to concentrate on riding your horse, which at this point was extremely important as the soil was a lot more unforgiving this time around.

Johnny was ahead of you and your brother who angrily mumbled something to himself as he looked at the results in front of him. He was clearly still upset about Diego finishing in first at the end of the last stage and even more so at Johnny who had had the audacity to finish before him despite promising not to. You roll your eyes upon hearing him rant to frankly no one but himself and focus on your own performance, finally caring to watch your steps on the rocky ground below.

Just then you notice Johnny slowing down the fast pace of his horse, seemingly eyeing something. “Johnny what’s wrong?” The blond turned to you and Gyro as the three of you came to a complete halt. “Dio’s sitting down over there. That’s Dio’s horse” he said, pointing at the very recognizable Silver Bullet. A short distance away from the horse you could indeed see Diego. “But.. They’re off course” You swiftly reach to grab a pair of binoculars from Gyro’s hands, much to his displeasure. “Hey! I was gonna use ‘em” You quickly wave you hand at your brother to shush him. “Shut up! I need to see him”

Looking through the binoculars helps you see Diego more clearly. A small gasp leaves your mouth as you note the horrible state he’s in. He was on the ground, barely conscious, hand on his head, his helmet situated not too far away from him, covered in small drops of blood, much like the head that was supposed to wear it. “H-he.. He fell..” Your voice wavers due to the fear and worry the painful image makes you feel. It was not like Diego at all to fall off his trustworthy steed. Something was definitely not right.

“He fell? Dio actually fell?” Johnny’s voice lacked the worry yours held, but was still just as confused. Gyro took the binoculars from you, looking through them himself to confirm the situation. “Well, it is a mountain course... Could be that he and his horse aren’t made for this type of land” Gyro’s eyes widened as he noticed movement coming from Diego’s direction. You could see something as well albeit not as clearly as your brother. “What? What is it Gyro?!” The volume of your voice only increases due to the sheer uncertainty of the situation which only makes you want to know more. “He cuddled up! He fell over holding his head!”

Your brother’s words were enough to make you approach Diego, not being able to stand the sight of him any further. Johnny was quick to try to stop you: “(Name), don’t! It might be a trap!” You ignored him though, which forced him and Gyro to come after you. No matter how untrustworthy Diego seemed to them, there was no way he was trying to fake this. He was clearly injured and you wouldn’t leave him before at least checking up on him.

“(Name), don’t get too close to him! We don’t know what happened to him!” Despite the annoyance your brother’s words made you feel, you still did as he said and stopped a safe, but not great distance away from Diego, the two males soon following after. Gyro grabbed Diego’s helmet from the ground and threw it towards him. “Hey, Dio! Are you alright?! If you want the rescue team to come, just say so! I’ll call them!” You hopped down from your horse, keeping a watchful eye on Diego. To your surprise, he started moving, slowly trying to sit up with a groan of pain leaving his mouth. “Diego?” You question with a soft voice, trying to perhaps ease his discomfort.

Diego shot a piercing glare at the three of you which alone was enough to make you retreat a few steps. “(Name) get back” Gyro’s warning behind you made you glance at him and then back at Diego. His cyan eyes had a strange look to them, almost threatening. Just then you notice the abnormal appearance of his hand. It was full of cracks with some of his nails seemingly cut off, making them sharp like claws. You swallow a lump of nervousness that lingered in your throat as you feel Diego’s glare practically stabbing you.

“Get lost, you three! In the end, I’m the one who’s going to pass you up!” The tone of his voice was terrifying, something you had never heard. It was like he was a totally different person. “Nyohoho!” Gyro’s smug laugh reached your ears and he swiftly began to leave the scene on Valkyrie. “Looks like he’s fine! Whether it’s a trap or not, he’s too healthy! That’s great!” His green eyes then locked on you. He knew what you were thinking and was quick to deny your silent request. “Let’s go!” You were about to protest but gave up as soon as his horse started speeding up, Johnny following him. Not wanting to be left behind you mount your steed and began to leave with the two, but not before glancing at Diego one more time, only to see him collapse on the hard ground.

~

What none of you didn’t expect was to see Diego again as you were passing through the rocky mountains. He had suddenly appeared, looking more aggressive and threatening. His whole demeanor had changed quite drastically and he even suggested staying at a small village for the night. During the whole trip though, everything about Diego seemed strange. He bragged about how good he felt, did some dangerous yet impressive tricks while on his horse and even cracked a joke.

Needless to say, the three of you were extremely puzzled by his behavior, Johnny and your brother trying to get away from him rather aggressively.

“Hey (Name)!” Your (E/C) eyes turned to look at him and his smug smirk he was wearing, reminding you of the previous night. Except this time his smirk seemed to hide something sinister in a way. “I know I was a bit of a jerk back there for yelling at you.. But really, it was mostly meant for those two idiots” His gloved hand that mostly covered his still slightly visible cracks pointed at your brother and Johnny who were riding beside you. “So I promise to make it up for you tonight once we get to the village. Trust me, my dear.. It’ll be amazing” 

The mischievous glint in his eyes and his suggestive words that left his mouth make your face heat up despite the wind blowing against it. You knew exactly what he was referring to and could only hope that Gyro didn’t hear it. Fortunately it seemed that he was busy talking to Johnny, most likely something related to the situation at hand.

When you were finally welcomed to the village with surprisingly open arms, you noticed that Diego was nowhere to be seen. Gyro suspected that he was conversing with the villagers full of excitement. Regardless he was more than happy to not have him around him, Johnny and especially you. Once you settled down, Gyro went to look for some food and you were left alone with Johnny who was quietly pouring some coffee into a cup.

“You think everything will be fine? You know, since Diego is close by and Gyro doesn’t exactly find his company enjoyable..” You question Johnny while sipping coffee from your own cup. The blue eyed male sighed. “I think it’ll be fine. As long as he doesn’t get too close to you..” You laugh at the thought of your protective brother, being reminded of the events that occurred the night before.

Just then you notice Johnny’s eyes start staring at something outside. You follow his shocked gaze, your (E/C) eyes landing on Diego who kneeling down in a corner, beastly sounds erupting from his mouth. Upon closer inspection you notice him eating something. Something that looked like.. Rocks??

Your eyes didn’t fool you. There he was, swallowing them whole like an animal, his body twisting in an odd way. You glance at Johnny whose shocked expression is equal to yours. Despite Johnny silently telling you to stay put, you place your cup down and begin to approach Diego with careful steps. You would be lying to yourself if you said you weren’t frightened as this state of Diego was seemingly even more unpredictable than his usual one.

And your fears are proven to be valid as in a quick motion, Diego’s head turns completely around, his eyes locked on you. This action causes you to jump and before you can do anything else, the male lunges forward, landing on top of you. “(Name)!” Johnny’s voice could be heard, but he’s unable to do anything to aid you.

Diego lowers his face to yours and begins to sniff the air around you, different aromas tickling his senses. “Smells like coffee..” He then looks up at Johnny. “Are you making coffee? What a pleasant aroma..” His cyan eyes return to you and he begins sniffing you like a dog, taking in the scent. “Diego, what the hell are you doing?!” Before he can do anything else, you quickly shove him off with a red face and you sit up examining him. He looks at you with a smirk that almost seems to reach his ears, his odd-looking teeth visible. “Oh, you know.. Just checking you out..”

You look at him, visible confusion laid across your entire face. Thank goodness Gyro wasn’t here or Diego would most likely lay dead in front of you. But still what on earth was wrong with him? You didn’t know why, but something deep down was telling you that this would all take a turn for the worse. And you didn’t like it.

[violet-knox]

The Yule Ball

Year 6 - Chapter 37

Summary: The night of the Yule Ball finally arrives and you have the time of your life dancing with Severus. Once the night comes to an end, Severus asks you to go for a walk with him, leading you to the little surprise he planned, further extending your lovely night together.

Word count: 6175

Warnings: ....mmmm angst... I swear most if it is fluff though, partial nudity as well, wouldn’t say its smutty but it’s for sure NSFW

Previous Chapter - Chapter 1

~

(Y/F/F) = your favorite food

(Y/F/D) = your favorite dessert 

~

Agreeing to go to the Yule Ball with Severus opened up a whole new world for you and you finally began to understand why the rest of your dormmates couldn’t stop talking about how excited they were. They couldn’t stop talking about it, and you couldn’t stop thinking about it. You were hoping that this day would finally let you to take the next step with Severus and bind you together in an eternal coupling. You had come so far, from fighting, to becoming friends, to falling in love with him. He had finally shown you that he returned your feelings and you didn’t want to let him go. 

You wanted this day to be perfect and you did everything you could to assure that it would be. Every day you would look at your dress and end up altering it using some charm you found amongst the endless stack of books in the library. Eventually you moved on to your heels before you began worrying about your hair. When did you become a girl who would worry so much about appearance? As a Quidditch player, the way you looked was always the least of your concern. But it seemed the idea of this Ball had completely warped your mindset and you could no longer recognize the girl blinded by love staring back at you each time you looked in the mirror, nitpicking all your imperfections. The nervousness slowly turned into endless insecurities you had never noticed until now, hoping they wouldn’t stop you from looking the part of the elegant date any guy would love to have at the Ball. 

Severus was just as skittish, not wanting to mess this up again. The little surprise he had planned turned out a lot better than he had initially expected and he hoped that it would make up for the way he had treated you in the past. It had been so difficult to keep this secret from you and he was anxious to see how you would react when you finally found out what he was up to each time he cancelled meetings with you. 

At first, you thought he was avoiding you, trying to come up with the words to tell you he no longer wanted to date you, but he quickly reassured you that was not the case. You genuinely had no idea what he was up to, but you had your suspicions when you caught him stuffing a letter you knew was from Professor Slughorn in his bag as you snuck up on him one day. The blush splattered across his face told you it was something he wanted to keep hidden from you, so you didn’t pry. 

The day finally rolled around, and excitement filled the entire castle from every fourth, fifth, six and seventh year of each house. You were the first of the Gryffindors to get ready as you had promised Severus you’d meet him a little earlier so you could have a moment alone before you walked in together. You checked yourself in the mirror a third time before you finally reached for your dress. You had done your hair in a quick loose updo, a few strangling strands to frame your face and your makeup was simple as you were never one for vibrant colors or heavy creams. You focused most of your attention on your eyes and had picked a style that made them pop. The thin layer of mascara is what really brought the look together as it lifted your eyelashes, elongating them enough to soften the glimmer in your eyes. Most of your makeup were from cheap muggle drug stores, but when you saw the mascara being sold in Diagon Alley, you just had to buy it and its magical properties completely exceeded your expectations. It had instructions on the various types of looks you could do with it and with one simple flick, you were able to accomplish such a natural look. If you didn’t know what your eyelashes had looked like prior, you would never have thought you had mascara on. 

You stepped into your dress and slowly zipped it up, watching it take form around your body. You smiled as you ran your hands over the black fabric, loving how glamorous you looked. Twisting your body, you admired the subtle shine it emitted. It took you so long to charm it, you felt proud of yourself for accomplishing such a vigorous spell and it turned out to be so worth it as it complimented your silhouette so well. Your fingers grazed the soft lace of the sleeves that blended so elegantly into the rest of the dress. It was a bit old fashioned, you couldn’t lie, but it just looked so good on you, and more importantly, it made you feel like the most stunning woman to ever walk down the halls of Hogwarts. 

The long-anticipated moment had finally come, and you couldn’t have been happier. You walked back to your bed and put on your glamorous silver heels that complimented your light cherry colored lips. As you finished, you felt your nerves slowly creeping back and you struggled to stand up. You had no idea why you felt this way as you knew Severus would be happy however you looked, but there was something else that etched its way to your mind, causing you to wonder if going as a couple was a good idea. You had never publicly displayed any sign of your affection to one another, and this Ball was as public as it would get. In fact, because you had been spending so much time together, you rarely ever saw anyone else and each time you would near the population of the school, you both sprang apart like children caught stealing candy. What would everyone think? Would the comments about being a traitor return? You shook your head, trying to rid yourself of such horrible thoughts and made your way to the common room. 

You gathered yourself, banishing any negative emotions from your mind and enthusiastically made your way to meet Severus outside of Gryffindor Tower. You couldn’t wait to see him in his dress robes as well his reaction to your own outfit.

“(Y/N),” Severus ogled you as he took in the stunning sight before him. He’d always thought you were rather attractive, though that feeling greatly increased a few months ago, but tonight, tonight you looked so dazzling, he found no word in the entire English language worthy enough to describe you.

You giggled at his expression, “How do I look?” you said softly as you examined him. You had never seen Severus look as handsome as he does now. He had thoroughly washed his hair, removing any sign of grease, giving it a little volume as if he’d blown it out. It looked soft to the touch and you had to resist the urge to run your fingers through it and ruin all the hard work he’d put into it. As you got closer, you could smell the light lavender smelling shampoo he used atop the musk of cologne he wore. His dress robes were nice and simple, obviously second hand, but you had noticed that he altered it as you did your dress. His ascot was as black as the rest of his attire and you wondered how much he had to spend on it as it appeared newer than his dress robes. All in all, he looked perfect to you and you were ecstatic that he was your date. 

“You look,” he started, looking you up and down, “stunning,” he ended as he pulled you in by your waist. You wrapped your arms around his neck and smiled. 

“As do you,” you whispered as you leaned in to close the distance. “My Prince,” he kissed you deeply, holding you close to himself. He had gotten so used to your little nickname for him, he no longer repulsed at the word. In fact, he had even begun to think of you as his princess in return. You gently slide your hand through his hair at the nape of his neck and confirmed that it indeed was a lot softer than usual. Once you parted, you stood there admiring each other, wishing every moment of your lives would be spent in the luxury you felt right now. 

“Shall we?” he asked.

“Lead the way,” you said, taking the arm he offered. 

You walked into the ballroom arm in arm as Severus lead you to an empty corner table, closer to a group of Ravenclaws, away from most of the Slytherins and Gryffindors. You and Severus chatted as everyone else began to settle into their seats. Finally. Finally, you were able to sit down at the same table together, and it was probably best you did so away from your own houses to avoid any unwanted glares. Only five minutes had passed, and you were already so pleased with the night. It felt so good to be talking to Severus so freely surrounded by all your school accountancies, no dumb boundaries about house segregation keeping you apart. 

Only two other couples joined your table; the first were a pair of Ravenclaws while the other, a Ravenclaw boy accompanying a Hufflepuff girl. You didn’t recognize any of them but offered a friendly smile nonetheless as they sat with you. You took a quick scan of the room and admired how nicely everyone was dressed. It was interesting to see everyone’s taste now that they were no longer restricted to their school uniform. The sea of colorful dresses spread throughout the room was a sight to behold. You could no longer distinguish houses or schools from one another, and it filled you up with joy to see the change in demeanor the school held. For a brief moment, it seemed everyone had let go of any rivalries whether it be between houses or blood status. The room, instead, was full of friends chatting, couples bonding and new relationships forming. 

Eventually, Professor Dumbledore grabbed everyone's attention as he introduced the champions. The doors flung open as everyone’s attention turned in anticipation to see the stars of the night walk up to their tables. You watched happily as they entered the room one by one, accompanied by their date. 

“Wow,” you heard Severus whisper to himself. You looked in the direction where his eyes were locked and saw Andrei accompanied by a beautiful girl who you couldn’t quiet place but looked awfully familiar to you. Your eyes widened and your heart began thumping against your chest as you realized that the girl Severus couldn’t take his eyes off was Lily Evans. 

You sank in your chair feeling agitated that he was now paying her more attention than you. Severus looked back at you as the Champions took their seats and he noticed your change in mood as you hung your head, slouching your shoulders.

“What’s wrong?” he asked you, worried that perhaps you regretted declining Andrei’s invitation to be his date. The Bulgarian was quite a handsome young man and Severus never understood why you chose him over such a dazzling date.

“Nothing,” you mumbled as you avoided his gaze. 

Severus was about to object to your answer, but Dumbeldore had once again asked for everyone’s attention as he made his speech and called for dinner to begin. The most glamorous food suddenly appeared in front of you, accompanied by beautifully designed plates and cutlery. A small smile formed on the corner of your lips as you admired the table and its contents. You had never seen such elegance put into a meal before and it made you feel enchanted. The variety was astounding, and you wondered just how much harder the house elves had to work to prepare all this food for such a big event.

Deciding not to pry, Severus reached for a dish of (Y/F/F) and offered it to you. You gladly accepted, appreciating chivalry. Humming in delight, you commented on how good the food was and Severus used this as an opportunity to continue conversing with you. You chat and ate until it was time for the Champions to take their dates out onto the dancefloor. 

Your smile slowly disappeared as you watched Andrei and Lily glide gracefully to the rhythm of the music. Feeling jealous and angry, you didn’t notice Severus looking at you with worry. Once other students joined the dancing couples, Severus took your hand, bringing your attention back to him.

“Care to dance?” he asked. You smiled at him as you nodded and watched as he removed himself from his seat. He gently took your hand, dragging it towards himself and you stood up, allowing him to lead you to the dancefloor. 

Once you reached a clear spot, Severus placed his free hand on your waist, inviting you to place yours on his shoulder. He elegantly guided you, as you both joined the rest of the party dancing in unison. You looked up at him, staring into his eyes as the world around you disappeared. Severus kept his gaze on you as he enjoyed watching the smile on your face grow. Your feet moved so easily as you had both practiced this dance in the astronomy tower so many times, it had become second nature to you. 

The dancefloor soon filled up completely as the entire room had paired up, hand in hand, dancing to the rhythm of the music. You were glad Severus had such a tight grip on you as you felt yourself lighten by how gracious he was and how well you moved together. The song was nearly half way through when you felt the acoustics rumble beneath your feet. It was perfect. This moment was worth waiting for and you prayed it would never end. 

Your heart skipped a beat as you felt Severus tighten his grip on your waist with both hands and lift you up in the air just in time with the melody. You held onto his shoulders as he spun half a circle in sync with all the other couples on the floor before setting you down gently. You felt his chest pressed against your stomach as he lowered you down and you kept your hands firmly on his shoulders. When your feet landed back on the floor, you noticed that your bodies were now pressed together, chests intertwining you and your arm stretch all the way around his neck. One of his hands had now rested on your lower back while the other had gone back to recapture your own hand. Severus gave a small smirk loving how close you were to him as he continued at a slower pace than before.

Everyone had been admiring the Champions and their dates over the last few months, saying they were so fortunate for the positions they held tonight, but Severus felt he was the one to be so lucky as to have the privilege of being with you. He had the most beautiful girl in the room in his arms and he was beyond grateful that you would ever accept such an invitation from him.

Severus regrettably loosened his grip on you and let go of your waist only to slowly spin you in place, watching the bottom of your dress follow your movements as it flared out. Your dress sparkled as you spun back around, facing him. As you placed your hand back on his shoulder, he flicked his hair away from his face and revealed the grin on his face. You were surprised to see such a big smile and as you examined him further, you realized his eyes actually shined. He was looking at you with such lust, you could hardly believe that he would allow himself to show such emotion in front of so many people. 

To your disappointment, the song ended, but you couldn’t look away from your date, your eyes locked on one another. Another slow song began, and he asked you if you wished to continue, to which you eagerly agreed. 

This time, the couples on the dancefloor kept to a simple sway as they continued moving clockwise around the dancefloor together. Severus took this opportunity to pull you in close again as he wrapped his hands around your waist and hoped you would warp yours around his neck. But, to his disappointment, you placed your hands on his chest instead, pushing you a bit further from him than he would have liked. You smiled up at him as you felt your heart flutter with amour. This had to be the best night you’d ever had. 

“You look beautiful tonight,” he whispered to you. “Thank you for coming with me.”

“There’s no one else I would have rather gone with,” you replied softly with a smile. 

Severus continued courting you in the hopes that you would want to press yourself closer to him.

“Then you have made me the luckiest person in this room,” he said and immediately got the reaction he was looking for as you giggled and moved your hands to the nape of his neck. 

“You’re wrong,” you said smugly, “I believe I have the honor of holding that title.” He was flustered by your compliment, but that feeling was slowly replaced with delight as you hugged him, resting your head on his shoulder. 

You felt his nose press into the crook of your neck as he buried his face into your shoulder, returning your embrace by snaking his hands on your back and gently pushing you deeper into his chest. He closed his eyes and took in your sweet scent, resisting the urge to kiss you everywhere he could reach as he felt it highly inappropriate to do so in front of so many people. If only they would all disappear and leave him to relish in your company comfortably. 

As you looked to your side, all the happy thoughts running through your head slowly began to fade as you had caught a glimpse of Lily looking more stunning than before. As she slowly turned, Andrei glanced over in your direction and caught your eye. You felt your heart momentarily stop in surprise as he gave you a small wink before bringing his attention back to his date. 

His flirtatious demeanor had you shifting in your place uncomfortably and led Severus to notice your change in aura. You thought he would stop when he realized you weren’t interested in being his date, but clearly, the Champion had no intention of giving up so easily. Severus lifted his head from where it hung and saw the sad expression on your face. Your eyes had begun to water and your hands shook ever so slightly. The small frown on your face broke his heart and he couldn’t stand to see you so upset.

“Are you okay?” he asked.

“Mhum,” you said as you pulled him closer and shut your eyes. 

“(Y/N), what is it?” he said, remembering the expression on your face at the beginning of the night.  

“It’s nothing,” you whispered, “Really.” But Severus was not convinced. He knew something was on your mind. He pulled you back from him to look at you as he tried again. 

“I know something is bothering you,” he said, “you have that look on your face.” Oh, he knew you so well. He could tell something was troubling you since the night began and you weren’t sure just how long you would be able to bottle up these feelings.

“Severus-”

“Tell me,” he demanded, but in a much softer tone than he would normally give in times like these. Perhaps it was better for you to tell him before he somehow found out on his own; better to be honest than to let these thoughts burn in the back of your mind, right? 

You sighed before you decided to confide in him. “It’s just… I saw the way you looked at Lily tonight and I know how you feel about her and Andrei has been occasionally flirting with me and-”

“What?” he said in shock as his head snapped in the direction of Andrei in anger. When you saw his gears turn in his head, you knew exactly what he was thinking and began to fear the worst. You didn’t want him to have a rivalry with the Champion like he did with James. It was bad enough he created that horrible spell to use against James last year, what if he decided to use it on the foreigner? The entire point of the Triwizard tournament was to make friends with the international wizards, not have them as enemies. 

“Severus, don’t, it’ll only make things worse,” you said, placing a hand on his cheek to grab his attention. 

“Wait,” he said, shaking his head as he remembered what you had started your little rant with, “W-what do you mean how I feel about Lily?”

You paused for a second, not really wanting to have this conversation. “Well, it’s just, you always used to talk about her before she stopped talking to you and the way you look at her...” you trailed off not knowing what to say. You felt your cheeks heat up as you looked away from him, letting your hands slip to his elbows. 

Severus looked at you in awe before he reached to tilt your chin towards him, searching your eyes before deciding to gently press his lips to yours. It was a quick kiss, but when he pulled away and saw the wide eyes staring back at him, he couldn’t help but pull you closer to him. You were astounded by the simple gesture, showing everyone in the room you were more than just a date to him. Never in a million years did you think him capable of showing such affection in public. He’d always been so hesitant each time you walked in the halls of the castle side by side, not daring to reach for your hand, but here he was, kissing you for the world to see. 

“(Y/N), I-I care about Lily. We were friends for a long time and… and that’s not something I can so easily forget. But it’s you I’m here with. I asked you to the Ball, not her. I want to be with you,” he said, trying to reassure you. “I… (Y/N), I-,” he stumbled as he so badly wanted to tell you exactly how he felt. “I love you,” he finally said looking at you with nothing but truth scribbled across his face.

Your heart fluttered as you couldn’t help but smile at him, hoping that what he was saying was true. You felt your mind go into overdrive, wondering if you had indeed heard him correctly. But the soft smile he gave you was more than enough to tell you he truly meant what he just said, and it caused your heart to swell in love. You never thought you would hear those words from him, let alone only a few months into dating. He’d never even called you his girlfriend, but then again, Severus wasn’t the type to care for such titles. 

He asked if you wanted to finish the dance to which you nodded your head as you wrapped your hands back around his neck and resumed swaying in his arms. 

You kept your eyes on him as your mind filled with all the lovely moments you had spent together. It wasn’t long before the music stopped and a louder, more upbeat song began. Severus lead you back to your table as neither of you had any interest in joining the jumping crowd. After chatting for a while, Severus held out his hand and asked you to join him for a walk. You gladly accepted, hoping for a bit of quiet as the music was getting quite loud.

Hand in hand, he led you outside the Ball and out into the courtyard. He was clearly heading somewhere, but you weren’t sure what destination he had in mind. The black lake perhaps? 

“Where are we going?” you asked curiously as Severus turned a corner, away from the lake. 

“It’s a surprise,” he said, shooting you a quick smirk. You blushed, anxious to see what Severus had in store for you. He’d been acting so mysterious ever since your first kiss, and you’d hardly even seen him the days leading up to the Ball. It became clear to you that he had been planning something, but what could he possibly have been up to? Finally, you made it to the astronomy tower and Severus held out his hand, gesturing for you to climb up the stairs.

“Some surprise,” you said to him sarcastically as you picked up your dress and held onto the railing making your way to the top. Severus scoffed in response, but you could see the small smirk tugging on the corner of his lips. You could feel the tail of the dress drag behind you, most likely capturing the dirt scattered across the stairs, but you didn’t care. Your only focus was Severus and his little surprise. He jumped a few steps ahead of you just as you neared the top and walked in front of you to hold the door open. 

You smiled at him as you walked in and immediately froze when Severus took out his wand and silently lit what looked to be about a hundred candles floating near the ceiling and around the parameter of the room. They had the exact same design as the candles that lit the Great Hall only shorter, more worn out. 

“Severus,” you whispered as your eyes landed on the beautiful layout Severus had prepared. A navy blue and silver carpet rested on the floor accompanied by several pillows, matching its design. In the center, you saw your favorite dessert, presented so elegantly, you couldn’t believe Severus did this all on his own. 

“I-I know it’s not much but-” he said nervously as he walked up behind you, wrapping his arms around your waist and resting his chin on your shoulder. 

“I love it,” you whispered, turning around to pull him into a passionate kiss. You tangled your fingers in his hair as you wanted to show him just how much you appreciated the gift. As your lips moved in sync, he slipped his tongue into your mouth and you arch your back in pleasure, pushing your chest against his. You only parted when the need for air was too great and as you did, Severus took your hand and walked you over to the carpet. 

“Where did you get all this?” you asked curiously. As you approached the set up, you realized just how intricate the design was. It was an old style, but the detail was astonishing. It had clearly been preserved well as its condition was near perfection. 

You both removed your shoes and sat side-by-side on the soft pillows he had laid out. You were surprised at just how comfortable the seating area was. Normally you hated sitting on the floor, but the carpet felt like a soft mattress. No doubt Severus charmed it, you thought.  

“Funny thing actually, I was walking in the castle on my way to the dungeons, when I saw this strange looking door. I’d never seen it before, so I thought I’d take a look and it contained all these old carpets and pillows, some used candles as well,” he replied as he offered a hand as you leaned in to cuddle next to him. “I didn’t know if I’d find the room again so I took what I could.”

Took what he could, you mentally laughed at this as he had clearly taken more than just a few candles. It must have taken a lot of concentration to levitate this all back to his room. Where did he even hide all this? You still had so many questions and the more you looked around the room, the more your appreciation grew for him. He did all this for you. He went through all this trouble for you.

“And the (Y/F/D)?” you asked.

“I bribed Slughorn,” he responded simply.

You chuckled as you leaned back, resting your head against his chest and suddenly remembered him frantically writing something during Potions the same day you first danced together. Was that part of it? You had guessed he was working on a potion, perhaps that was what he was doing. “What did you give him in return?”

“I offered him a recipe for Felix Felicious that lasts twice as long as the one given in the textbook. I had to brew a batch just so he knew I wasn’t trying to deceive him,” he responded as he gently placed a hand on your waist.

Liquid Luck was a hard potion to make, you knew that, though it didn’t surprise you that he was able to not only brew it but extend its effects as well. How much time had he spent putting all this together? He must really have meant what he said when he told you he loves you if he was willing to work so hard just to please you. “That must have taken a while!”

“Yeah, but it was worth it,” he whispered as he tightened his hold on you and began leaving soft kisses along your neck. You closed your eyes and leaned in further feeling his hair graze your cheek as he continued trailing his lips along your jawline. A smile grew across your face as he wrapped his arm around your stomach, holding you close to his heart. Slowly, you adjusted your position and twisting your body, wanting to kiss him. You lifted your head up as your hand went to cup his cheek. 

“Thank you,” you whispered before pressing your lips to his. He smiled as you sat back, and he kissed the top of your head before leaning over to bring a plate of (Y/F/D) to you. He fed you your first bite before you helped yourself. The room filled with silence as you ate, enjoying the twinkling stars beaming down on you from the skylight above. 

“How is it?” he asked. 

“Perfect,” you replied as you picked up another piece. “Thank you Sev, for everything.” He smiled at you in relief, glad to see the joyful expression across your face. He knew what he had done wasn’t much, but as his budget didn’t allow for any splurging, he had to make do and hope you would appreciate it nonetheless. All that work, all those extra hours spent in the Potions classroom was worth it to see the look on your face right now, and he would gladly do it again if it meant seeing you smile like that every day.

Moments passed and you found yourself turned towards him, lips locked together and tongues dancing in your mouths. You had both hands tangled in his hair, completely disregarding all that effort he had clearly put in making it look so perfect, but neither of you cared as you only wanted to feel more of one another. He slowly moved one hand to your thigh as his grip on you tightened and he quickly pulled you into his lap. Gasping at the sudden movement, you wrapped your arm around him and continued kissing him, placing your other hand on his chest. 

After you parted, he attached himself to your neck and began leaving soft love marks, making his way up to your jaw as he slowly leaned you back onto the pillows beside him. He hovered over you, connecting your lips again as your head gently landed on the soft fabric beneath you. You found your hands roaming, wanting to feel more of him, ripping at his dress robes. He helped you take them off until a white button up was all that kept your fingers from feeling his pale skin. You unbuttoned his shirt and ran your hands up his bare chest and he moaned into your mouth in return which only splurged you on more. He felt sparks tingle everywhere your fingers touched, a blessing in disguise.

Severus went to tangle his hand in your hair, keeping the other on your hip, only to struggle with the updo you had done. He gave up and rested his palm beside your head as you parted. Giggling, you took out a pin and ruffled your hair, discarding whatever trinkets you’d used to keep it in place before pulling him closer and reconnecting your lips. His fingers finally swam in your hair freely and you felt him guide your head to the side to deepen the kiss further. You very slowly moved your hands all along his arms until they reached his round shoulders. His skin was a lot softer than you’d imagine and it felt so good to feel so much of him all at once like this. Your fingers traced small shapes over his chest, loving the new texture that had your heart pumping feverishly fast. Feeling your hands exploring his body made him want to do the same. He moved his lips down to your collarbone and kissed all around your neckline, eventually making his way to your chest, placing light, cautious kisses over your clothed breasts. 

You closed your eyes as your breathing hitched and you pressed your chest to him, wanting more. Deciding you were comfortable enough with him to take it a step further, you pulled him off you and asked him to unzip your dress.

“Are you sure (Y/N)?” he asked after pausing to see how serious you were. You lifted yourself up as he pulled himself off you. You looked into his eyes, showing nothing but love. He’d more than proven tonight that you could trust him and that’s exactly how you felt.

“I love you Severus,” you said as you nodded, gesturing for him to continue. He slowly unzipped your dress and began pulling down your sleeves, kissing every new piece of skin that was exposed to him. Once your hands were freed and your bra presented itself completely to him, you leaned back down on the comfort of the soft fabric beneath you and enjoyed his soft touches. 

Severus began to suck on the skin above one of your cups while he messaged your other breast over your bra. Your eyes were wired shut as your hands tugged on his soft locks. Your breathing hitched and you whispered his name as he continued his trail down to the center of your chest. He felt his pants tighten when he heard you plead for him. Wanting more, he sat up and looked into your eyes with so much lust, trying to determine how far you were thinking of going tonight. You looked back at him as you sat up. You could feel your heart pounding against your ribs and wondered if he could hear it. You searched his eyes and prayed he was okay with continuing your frantic sexual advancements. You were no longer able to contain your urges and he watched as you quickly hiked up your dress, straddled him and reconnected your lips, letting your hands exhibit your excitement as you roughly pushed his shirt off his shoulders. 

Once you parted, you began to kiss his jaw, eventually attaching yourself to his neck, leaving as many love marks as you could. You pushed on his chest, silently telling him that it was his turn to lean back, to which he gladly obliged. He placed his hands on your shoulder and allowed you to move as you pleased. You locked eyes with him as you began kissing down the middle of his chest, slowly making your way down, making sure not to leave any skin untouched between kisses. His chest heaved and he closed his eyes as his head tilted back, enjoying the feeling of your soft lips pressed against his boney figure. You left your hands over his chest as you passed his stomach, allowing him to tangle your fingers with his. You could feel his heart pump faster under your palm, matching the rhythm your own heart made. It was such a magical moment, you felt nothing could possibly challenge this wonderful night with all its perfections. 

Severus was in such bliss, and he felt his mind blur as you began kissing right above his belt line. His eyes rolled back as his head fell on the pillows behind him. He’d never felt this fuzzy before, but it was a feeling he rather enjoyed. He was so high on pleasure, he couldn’t help the next word that slipped his lips as he felt you kissing atop his pants, heading towards to bulge that had made itself quite apparent. A word that would surely seal your fate as a couple and undo every moment you had spent together over the last two years. 

“Lily.”

~

Next Chapter

~

A/N: I’m sorry. 😭😭😭 *Hides under covers* *Sobs into pillow*

@hoppingsnape @dusk-realm @a-slytherin-sin @trashandshook @gbatesx @sneezy-s @emsdroid @leah-halliwell92 @dellightfullydeceitful @xxaamzxx @sparklingkeylimepie @nameless-sovereign @wanderingtrails

[jiminisjamin]

Title: Teen Idle

A/n: This is part three, this part also starts with a memory, and it’s italicized. (these memories are not in any sort of chronological order, but all take place during high school.)

AU: College/Frat

Warnings for Chapter: Language, mentions of alcohol, minor-angst, minor-fluff, suggestive content.

Rating: Angst/Fluff

Word Count: 3,011

 “Y/n, I want to show you something.” Jeongguk smiles, holding his hand out to her. “Trust me, you’ll love it.” Y/n grins, taking his hand and stepping forward.

“What is it?” She asks, laughing when he covers her eyes, nudging her forward.

“You’ll find out soon enough.” He laughs, guiding her carefully out of the car and shutting the door behind them, helping her navigate up the small hill.

“Jeongguk, come on.” Y/n whines, reaching up and grabbing his wrist, trying to tug his hand down. “Just let me see,” Jeongguk grins, swatting her hand away with his other.

“Cut it out, you little baby. Just trust me. It’ll be so much cooler this way.”

They walk in silence for what seems like an hour before Jeongguk stops walking, keeping his hand over her eyes. “Sit down.”

“What? Why?”

“Just do it, y/n.”

She sits down, and he follows her, pushing her forward gently and nestling her between his legs.

“Jeongguk, what is this?” She frowns when she feels her legs dangle off the edge of something, her hand gripping his thigh. “Are you going to kill me?” Jeongguk laughs, moving his hand away from her eyes.

“You can look, y/n.” When her eyes open, it takes a few moments to adjust to the small source of light the moon gives them, and her gaze drops down. She gasps, leaning slightly to get a better look- and Jeongguk secures his arms around her waist to make sure she won’t fall.

“Jeongguk, it’s…beautiful.”

A clear lake lies beneath them, only a few feet down, speckled and glowing with the reflection of stars and the moon, the dark water gleaming up at them, looking like an opening to the galaxy above them.

“It’s pretty, isn’t it?” He mumbles. “I’ve always come here by myself before…but I thought you’d like it.” Y/n tugs on his arm, grinning slightly as she turns around to face him.

“Let’s go swimming.” His mouth drops open.

“What?”

“Please, Jeongguk. It looks…I want to swim in it. It would be so fun.” Jeongguk grins.

“Last one in has to buy the other dinner,” in their hurry to separate from each other, both wanting to get in before the other, they both fall forward, a loud yelp flying past y/n’s lips as they fall, gazes turned up towards the sky as they plunge into it’s reflection.

“Jeongguk, oh my god!” Y/n sputters, kicking her legs she wipes her eyes, hearing the sound of Jeongguk swimming over.

“Y/n, are you okay? Y/n?”

 “Y/n?” Jeongguk sits down at the edge of the pool, setting the case of beers in between them. “Y/n…please talk to me.” His voice is smaller than it’d ever been, which prompts y/n to look over at him, only to see tears rolling down his cheeks as well.

“What are we doing, Jeongguk?” She hiccups, covering her mouth to cover up her quiet sob. “Why are we doing this? What happened to us?” Jeongguk clenches his jaw again, pulling a beer out of the case and cracking it open, staring up at the darkening sky.

“I’m sorry.”

“That’s not enough, Jeongguk. Shit, I don’t even know what’s going on, I don’t…I don’t understand.” He sighs, closing his eyes and taking a long drink- only to hear a small curse, a yelp, and when his eyes were open, y/n was in the water. The sides of the pool light up the water, allowing him to see her struggling slightly to get to the surface, and he drops the can, sliding into the water and moving over to her easily, diving down and wrapping his arms around her, pushing off the bottom of the pool for momentum and bringing her to the surface. Y/n sputters, blinking away the water from her eyes.

“I’m sorry,” he repeats, his arms staying around her as he pulls her against his chest. “It’s my fault, y/n. I’m sorry.” Y/n sniffles as Jeongguk takes them over to a small circle in the pool, sitting down on it and pulling her onto his lap, making a soft shushing sound as he cradles her in his arms.

“Why did you stop talking to me?” She whispers. “Did you hate me? Do you hate me?”

“No- y/n, I don’t…I couldn’t hate you, even if I tried.” Jeongguk nuzzles her neck, his words muffled as he sighs against her skin. “I love you, y/n, you know that. You know that…” his voice trails off, his hand gripping the edge of her shirt. “You’re my best friend.” He murmurs. “You know…” Jeongguk swallows roughly, his hand twitching slightly as it slides up the front of her shirt, flattening against her stomach. “You know I care about you.” Y/n’s heart races and she leans hear head back against his chest, closing her eyes.

“I care about you too,” she mumbles. “Why did you…why?” Jeongguk lifts his head, resting his chin on her shoulder, his tongue swiping at his bottom lip as he sighs.

“I can’t…” He closes his eyes, sighing again, his arm wrapping tighter around her, his hand sliding further up. “I don’t…I don’t know,” he knows it’s a lie, his heart beats wildly in his chest, and he can feel her shaking against him, hear heart quietly crying, yet he doesn’t know what to say to comfort her. Jeongguk keeps her in his grip, tilting his head down and pressing a kiss to her neck. “I’m sorry, y/n.” His other hand slides to rest on her thigh, his eyes closing as he pushes at her neck with his nose briefly, his lips hovering over her skin. “I missed you,” he isn’t sure if she hears him, his voice so soft, so low that he can barely discern if he even really said it, but it doesn’t matter because he presses his lips to her neck again and savors the feeling of her warm skin, pulling her body closer to his as he mumbles apologies, desperately wanting her to stop crying, alcohol muddling his brain as he pulls at her clothes, gripping her tightly, just wanting her closer.

Y/n grabs his arm, turning her head slightly, causing their noses to lightly bump together. “Jeongguk…” Her eyes open briefly, just long enough to see him staring at her, his expression clouded, his eyes shining, a light blush spreading across his cheeks as he watches her. Y/n’s expression shifts as tears spring to her eyes. “Jeon Jeongguk,” her voice is soft, “where have you been?” Jeongguk smiles, resting his forehead against hers.

“I’m here now, y/n.”

“I missed you,” she mumbles, her eyes fluttering shut. Their lips are just about to meet, when she sighs, whispering, “I missed my best friend.”

That’s when Jeongguk snaps out of his daze, his whole body going rigid. His hands move away from her almost instantly. “You’re drunk.” The words fall past his lips, and he stutters, “I- we’re drunk, we shouldn’t…” Y/n hums, leaning against him and he frowns, noticing her sleepy demeanor.

“I’m not drunk,” she mumbles, her hand gripping his shirt. “It’s fine, Jeongguk. Just kiss me.” Jeongguk rolls his eyes slightly and stands up, keeping a tight grip on her as he does.

“You’re hammered, come on.” Jeongguk grabs her hand, pausing before looking at her. He sighs, bending down and scooping her up in his arms. “Come on,” he murmurs, “let’s get you to bed, yeah?” Y/n whines slightly, wrapping her arms around his neck and leaning her head against his shoulder.

 Jeongguk glances over his shoulder when he hears a loud crash and shouts from downstairs and he shakes his head, struggling briefly to get his doors open with y/n in his arms. When he steps into his room, y/n stirs, her eyes peeking open as she looks at him.

“Where…” He smiles at her, shutting the door with his foot and moving to his desk chair, setting her down in it carefully.

“I’m gonna get you some dry clothes, okay?” Y/n closes her eyes, nodding as she sighs and leans back. Jeongguk pauses, his gaze roaming her tired figure, a smile creeping across his face as he burns the image into his brain.

“…guk…” He turns, moving quickly over to his dresser and pulling out one of his old shirts and a pair of boxers, coughing as he holds them out to her.

“Feel free to wear whatever of these you want,” a blush creeps up his neck and he coughs slightly, dropping them onto her lap when she doesn’t take them. “I’ll take your clothes and throw them in the washer with mine…once you’re changed.” Y/n pouts and he hears her stand up from the chair, followed by the soft thumps of her wet clothes hitting the floor. His blush intensifies and he directs his gaze to the ground, not moving until he hears the squeak of the mattress and a soft yawn.

“Jeongguk…” He turns, picking up the clothes and smiling, quickly grabbing a pair of boxers, briefly turning to her.

“I’ll bring your clothes to you in the morning.”

“Jeongguk, wait.” Her voice stops him at the door. “Please…Jeongguk.” He turns, his head tilting slightly.

“Do you feel okay? Would you rather go home? I can call a cab and ride home with you, if you…” He stops when she shakes her head.

“Where are you staying?”

“I’ll sleep on the couch,” the words tumble past his lips and the blush spreads up to his face. “It’s fine- it’s comfortable.”

“Jeongguk,” y/n whines, “I…I don’t mind if you sleep here?” His heart practically stops beating as he watches her. “I want you to.”

“You’re drunk,” he replies. She rolls her eyes.

“Not like that…pervert.” She lays on her side, pulling the blankets around herself. “I…I’m afraid, Jeongguk.”

“You’re safe here Y/n, don’t worry.”

“No, no…I’m not afraid- I mean- shit. You seem like you, Jeongguk. I’m afraid when I wake up you’ll be gone again. I don’t want to lose you again- I can’t lose you again, Jeongguk…please stay with me? I want you with me. Jeon Jeongguk. I want him here as long as I can have him.” His gaze softens as he watches her.

“Y/n…”

“You don’t have to…I just…I don’t want you gone.”

“I’m sorry,” he whispers, “I’m sorry I left you. I won’t leave you again, okay?” She nods slowly, and he tosses the clothes in his hamper, and turns around. “I’ll be right back. I’m gonna wash these and toss them in the dryer- I need to change into dry clothes. Try to get some sleep, yeah?” She seems comforted by his words and nods, closing her eyes and settling down in the covers. Jeongguk opens the door and slips out quickly. He pauses for a moment before heading to the laundry room and throwing the clothes in the wash, stripping his clothes off quickly and tossing them in as well after redressing. He keeps stepping in and out of the room, glancing back at his door. Do I go back? Does she really want me to…

 The door creaks open and Y/n opens her eyes briefly, squinting at the light that pours in and quickly disappears as someone shuts the door behind them. The figure pauses at the doorway, swaying slightly. “Y/n?” She smiles, humming in response. This seems to reassure Jeongguk, and he moves forward, pushing the covers back and laying down. “I can put more clothes on if you’re uncomfortable?” Y/n rolls her eyes and moves closer to him, sighing as she buries her face in his neck.

“Shut up.” She mumbles, looking up briefly as she narrows her eyes. “You took a shower?”

“I was waiting for the clothes to be dry,” he mumbles, looking away from her. “Are you…sure this is okay?” She sighs.

“I miss being close with you,” she whispers. “I miss you.” He nods slowly, trying his best to hide the smile that creeps across his face as he wraps his arms around her.

“I miss you too, y/n.”

Jeongguk feels someone shifting next to him, moving closer instead of rolling away like he was used to. His eyes peek open, sleep still clouding his mind- and a raging headache threatening to burst his brain- his gaze settles on y/n. His lips tip up into a smile at her soft expression and he rests his hand on the back of her head, pulling her in closer and cradling her body against his, pressing a soft kiss to the top of her head.

The peaceful nature only lasts for a few seconds however, because he hears the loud pounding of someone barreling up the stairs and winces, curling his body around hers, hoping to disappear, stay unnoticed by whichever of his friends was coming up to wake them up, but when the footsteps stop, a soft knock comes at the door, and he turns, blinking blearily when Jimin walks in, his eyebrows furrowed. His body tenses around y/n, pulling her closer to him as his stomach turns.

“Jeongguk…” Jimin looks down, chewing his bottom lip. “I…I didn’t mean for it to happen, you know that, right?” His voice is quiet and Jeongguk sighs, appreciative that he’s considerate enough to not wake y/n up.

“I figured as much, Jimin.”

“I really…I thought…” Jimin looks at the two of them. “I thought I could…”

“I know, Jimin.” Jeongguk smiles, turning his gaze to the ceiling. “But please, please…don’t meddle anymore.” Jimin smiles softly.

“I’m sorry.” Jeongguk rolls his eyes, flipping Jimin off briefly before grinning at him. He closes his eyes, settling back against the bed, running his hands absentmindedly down y/n’s back. “Uh…” His eyes snap open and he looks at Jimin. “Did you guys…I mean, not that it’s my business, it’s just…you were so rude to her earlier, and you were both pretty drunk, are you sure she’s fine with-”

“Jimin?”

“Yeah?”

“Get. Out.”

Jeongguk looks at her again once the door is shut, ignoring Jimin’s apologizes as he watches her. “Y/n?” He murmurs, shaking her slightly and shifting further away. Worry pulls at his conscious; should he have denied sharing the bed with her? Would she be uncomfortable knowing that they slept in the same bed? Doubt clouds his mind as he shakes her awake.

“Hm?” She opens her eyes, peering up at him. “You’re still here.”

His heart leaps into his throat and his whole body goes stiff. “S-shit, y/n, I’m sorry…you…you wa- I thought you wanted me to-” She grins, laughing loudly as she slaps his arm.

“God, I missed you, Jeongguk.”

“Huh?” His eyebrows furrow and she grins at him, sitting up and yawning.

“You get so panicked…it’s really easy to mess with you, Jeongguk…” She shakes her head, fighting off another yawn as she tilts her head, stretching her neck. “I’m not mad at you. I wasn’t like…wasted or anything. I was just…tipsy.”

Jeongguk snorts; she probably doesn’t remember us almost kissing. He rolls his eyes at her. “Yeah, whatever- give me a heart attack for trying to be gentlemanly.” Y/n grins toothily at him.

“Ah yes, you slept next to me- and they say chivalry is dead.” Jeongguk laughs loudly, his gaze flicking away from her as a blush creeps up the back of his neck.

“Well…you probably have somewhere you need to be, I’m guessing?” Y/n bites her lip, looking down a that the plush comforter.

“Yeah.” She murmurs.

“Will you be at the party tonight-it’s at the same place as the other one was.” The words rush past his lips before he can stop them, and she looks over at her, tilting her head.

“Another party?” Jeongguk inhales sharply, and he bites his lip, glancing over at her. Jeongguk doesn’t know when it happened but his body settles closer to her again, one arm wrapping around her waist as he strokes her back.

“You know…there’s parties every day.” Y/n’s eyes bug out of her head in mock shock.

“In college? No way.” He can’t help but grin, his hand raising to brush her stray hairs back, his hand stopping to cup her cheek. She stares at him, her lips slightly parted as she sighs. “You know, I still can’t believe…you’re so…” When he quirks an eyebrow at her, a blush spreads across her face and he drops his hand, resting it on her waist.

“So what?”

“So different, but you’re…the same? I guess- it’s weird, I don’t know.” Jeongguk looks away briefly, humming as his fingers toy with the end of her shirt. “Not that it’s a bad thing- I mean, you were my best friend- I just…all I mean to say is…you’re like…hot now.” Jeongguk sputters slightly, his features shifting in shocks as he pulls away slightly.

“Are you meaning to say I wasn’t hot before?”

“I mean- th-that’s not what I meant, I just, all I meant was that before you were like…like a…I don’t know, you were cute when you were younger but now yo-”

Jeongguk grins, his finger tapping the end of her nose as he pushes out of the bed, glancing at her out of the corner of his eye as he stretches. “You’re too easy to tease,” his grin widens when her face bursts into flames and she practically launches herself over to him landing a fake, but still powerful, punch to his arm. Jeongguk catches her by her waist and spins them both, lifting her in the air as he does. “Hey hey, what was that for?”

“You’re- don’t tease me.” Jeongguk grins, tapping her leg slightly. “What? Put me down!” Jeongguk hums, shifting his grip on her to set her gently back down. He leans over her, stepping forward and wedging her between the edge of the bed and his body. He leans forward, propping himself up with his arm, leaning his forehead against hers and staring into her eyes. “I…Jeongguk.” He grins, shaking his head.

“No, I Jeongguk.” Y/n scoffs, ducking away from him and shaking her head, biting her lips to hold back her laughter.

“Whatever, weirdo.”