#just thank the gods CR didn't do this
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thatonesadending · 2 years ago
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How Caleb got that silly red ribbon
(I had to take a break from editing the 16,000 words I have yet to post for my main fic, and this happen) Established Essek/Caleb + feelings about Molly/Kingsley 
Angst/Pining/Not really a happy ending/open ending - Mild Mighty Nein Reunion Spoilers
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“I don’t know why you insist on wearing this thing, but if you must, at least insure that it is straight,” Essek sighed dramatically, leaning into Caleb in front of the others, pointedly ignoring their snickers and whispers while he adjusted the red bow at Caleb’s collar.
“Nothing about him is straight, Essek. You should know that,” Beau teased from the bean bag she was sharing with Yasha, pulled into the circle of furniture in the salon where the Nein had gathered for their first of many monthly gatherings in the Tower. 
Essek ignored her goating. They hadn’t made their relationship public yet, but there was increasingly less of a point to it since it was fairly obvious to everyone, especially since the spymaster elf could not contain his sly smile as he smooth his hands down Caleb’s shoulders after correcting the crooked bow and making the human blush. 
“It’s a tie,” Caleb offered as an excuse even though he knew none was needed for the playful ribbing.
“I may not be an expert in Empire fashions, but I am quite certain that this is not a tie,” Caleb opened his mouth to argue, but Essek swiftly stopped him by continuing, “and do not insult bow ties by insinuating that is one.”
“My students like it.”
“They like having something to snicker at,” Essek flicked one of the ends of the red ribbon before smiling into his half drunk glass of wine. It was good to see him like this, relaxed and enjoying himself. Not that that had been an uncommon sight for Caleb the past few months, but the rest of their friends hadn’t gotten to see much of it, and it made Caleb’s heart a little more full to be able to share it with them in their magical home. 
They all were gathered around a warm fire in the Salon, glasses all at different levels and with full bellies, relaxing in each other’s company with no looming threats for what felt like the first time. Or at least that’s what Caleb had thought, somehow missing the agitated swish of a lavender tail in the corner of the room. 
“Godsdamn,” Kingsley abruptly stood up, his stride smooth after a wobbly first one thanks to the endless refills of ale provided by the tower cats, “Had I known it was gonna bother your boyfriend so fucking much, I wouldn’t have bothered.”
The swashbuckler was attempting to keep his tone light, play off his annoyance as a joke, but Caleb could feel his hurt by how he squatted in front of where the human sat on the loveseat next to Essek and lifted his bearded chin a bit more roughly then necessary. Quick fingers and a tug, and the ribbon was gone from around Caleb’s next. He wanted to protest, ask to keep the ribbon at least, but Kingsley stood and already had his deft hands tying the colorful gifted ribbon around the wizard’s ponytail instead. 
“Ta-da! Better?” He asked Essek with a half sarcastic flourish, to which the elf stayed quite unsure how to interpret Kingsley's mood.
“Aww, now he kinda looks like a schoolgirl! I am sure your lady students will love it, Cayleb,” Jester was trying to defuse the tension, but Kingsley’s eye twitched before his face turned hard as stone. 
“You lot really will make fun of him for anything, huh?” The ribbon was pulled free again, and this time Kingsley took it with him as he walked away, leaving Caleb with his protests caught in his throat lest he make his friend more frustrated. He hadn’t reached the chaise lounge he had been occupying before another of their friends spoke up, and Caleb kicked himself for not stepping in sooner to defend the ribbon.
“What the fuck man? We are just having a little fun, it's just a ribbon,” Beau chuckled, half confused and half dismissive. 
Kingsley sighed, shaking his head as to dispel his foul mood. However, Caleb saw how his gloved hand clenched around the ribbon repeatedly before dumping the object of contention in one of the waste bins, and then stuffing his hands back into his coat pockets that were lined in the same material. 
“No, no you are right, I am just tired, is all. Bit sensitive from a day trying to keep the crew from ruining the hull further while we patched her up, apparently. Gonna go take a bath. Night y’all.” 
Kingsley didn’t give anyone the space to challenge him, but ducked out of the Salon much quicker than a sore sailor should be able to. An awkward silence stretched for a time, until a dark purple Mage Hand fished the discarded ribbon, and Essek dutifully cast Prestidigitation on it a few times despite there being nothing soiling it.  
“I sincerely apologize, Caleb. I had not meant any ill —”
“No need, Schatz. You did not do anything wrong, I know you only tease because you care. I took no offense,” the confusion and worry ebbed a bit from Essek’s eyes, which was worth admission of affection in front of their friends. 
“I do believe I need to apologize to Kingsley, however. I had not known he had gifted it to you, otherwise I wouldn’t have—”
“He did not,” Caleb felt horrible about cutting Essek off again, and worst for the listening ears now on him looking for an explanation, “He did not give it to me, not really. It had been meant as a gift for Frumpkin.”
The seconds dragged as Caleb fought not to get overwhelmed by the Nein’s silence as they all understood the unspoken in what he had said. All except for Essek. 
“To my knowledge, Kingsley never met Frumpkin, correct?”
“Yes, that is correct.”
“Oh.”
The skin on the back of his neck burned, but he dropped his voice closer to a whisper, knowing it wouldn’t do much good to the more inquisitive of their group. 
“I hadn’t expected him to be so upset when he found out Frumpkin was no longer with me. I took the gift and wore it myself as more of a joke to make him less sad. I will admit to continuing to wear it because it made him smile, and in turn me, because it reminded me of my friend,” the confession brought up so many conflicting and confusing feelings for the wizard that he had been stuffing down since they left Cognoza, and he couldn’t help the guilt that washed over him as he told his friend turned lover what he had been keeping private, “I am sorry, Essek. I should not have kept that from you.”
“It seems like both have a habit of apologizing to the wrong people,” Essek huffed, but still gave Caleb a kind smile while cupping his cheek with understanding the human was sure he didn’t deserve, “Go talk to him. I am sure he will be glad to retie it if you ask.”
“Nein,” Caleb shook his head, taking the hand away from his face and giving it a definitive kiss along the knuckles so Essek wouldn’t think for a moment he was wavering on his feelings for the other wizard.  “This is for the best. It hadn’t been meant for me, it will be better if I let it go.”
Let him go.
”Besides, you are right,” he continued, louder and with an attempt to return to casualness he did not feel, “it was a rather unprofessional tie. You will just have to help me select a new one before the start of the new semester at the Academy.” 
Predictably, there was a chorus of cheers and questions from the others at this confirmation that Caleb had finally accepted the offered teaching position at his old school. He answered all of them except for Jester’s more filthy ones about how he planned on christening his office. Eventually the good-natured mood returned to their group, aided with refilled glasses and fresh pastries. 
Everyone that was, except for Essek, whose gaze was watching Caleb a little too carefully in that way that told the human his partner was not happy with his evasiveness on the subject. Caleb watched the red ribbon disappear quietly into the elf’s WristPocket, he had almost reached out to grab it, to ask to keep it. But he didn’t think his heart would survive the explanation, that it was the only reminder he had left of his old friend. The colorful tattoo’s glamored away in an effort to make Kingsley more of his own, all his old jewelry lying in a shallow grave where Lucien had tossed them, the coat and cards all now belonging to someone new. 
The ribbon might have come from the scraps of Kingsley’s new identity, but it was all Caleb had to know that little fragment was still there, not completely lost to the ether. Reaching out to pet his cat like Mollymauk always used to, when really what the BloodHunter had wanted was Caleb’s attention. But the dirty old wizard had never given when he had had the chance, too scared of being hurt. Now too scared of being the one to hurt others. He owed it to Essek, to Kingsley, to not hurt them by holding on to a silly ribbon.
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mochamvgz · 7 months ago
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made with love.p.jay
; a warm meal with your partner was all you needed after a hectic month
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; park jongseong x reader
; genre: fluff, non-idol au
; warnings: talk of exhaustion
; 0.7k words
; tags: @inkelea @sobun1est @kbookshelf
; divider cr: @plutism (i can't believe I forgot to credit them earlier 😭😭 if you're reading this i'm so so sorry)
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you entered the passcode to your studio apartment, letting yourself in after being met with an affirmative *beep*
after carelessly tossing your backpack onto the kitchen counter, you miraculously managed to drag yourself to your bed, collapsing on it right away
thank god it's saturday tomorrow
that was the only thought in your mind at present. you'd had a hectic week—no, a hectic fortnight...or was it a month...? your pre-existing headache grew worse as you tried to recall so you gave up eventually
your eyelids grew heavy and just as you were about to board your train to dreamland, star lost by stray kids started playing from the front pocket of your pants. wait, no, that couldn't be right. pockets don't make sounds...oh, it was only your phone ringing
an annoyed grunt escaped your mouth before you checked the caller id. a tired but genuine smile speak across your face when you saw who it was. you accepted the call and put it on speaker
"how's my girl doing?"
you could almost hear the smile in jay's voice, which, in turn, made your own smile widen. "i'm feeling pretty wiped honestly"
jay knew that, he'd noticed the way your smile didn't reach your eyes these days, how your shoulders seemed deflated, the way you looked as if you could pass out at any given moment. of course, he'd be there to catch you if you did
"have you had anything to eat yet?"
"no...sorry"
jay had expected as much
"want me to come over? i can make you something to eat, and then we could cuddle or watch a movie or something"
"yes please, i could really use your cuddles. only if it's not too much of a bother, of course"
"nothing's ever a bother when it comes to you. i'll be there in 10. wait for me, yeah?"
you hummed in response and hung up with an "i love you" which he mirrored back. his soft voice when he spoke to you always warmed your heart. you dozed off thinking about how you truly had the best boyfriend ever
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the clatter of pots and pans jolted you awake
you screwed your eyes shut as a groan escaped you, the blaring headache coming back. you heard someone cursing, probably the same person responsible for the racket that disrupted your sleep
sitting up, you began to rub your eyes when you heard a sequence of frantic footsteps, getting progressively closer, and then a pair of arms wrapping around you
you looked up to see jay with an apologetic expression on his face
"i'm soo sorry 'bout that sweetheart, I was trying to be quiet but..."
you mumbled an "it's okay" while hugging him back. after staying in that position for some time, jay broke the silence
"how about you wash up yeah? i'll be in the kitchen"
you noded, shooting him a smile—which he returned—before getting up and making your way to your bathroom
when you came back out, feeling considerably more rested and energized, you found your bed was made, and your previously-cluttered desk was much tidier. a smile made it's way on your face, knowing it could be none other than jay's work
jay noticed you as you approached the kitchen counter, his face lighting up
"you're right on time for dinner!"
"dinner? don't you mean lunch?"
he tilted his head a little to the side in confusion
"it's 7:00 p.m. sweetie"
"already??? have i been out for that long? why didn't you wake me up??"
jay chuckled, "you looked so cute sleeping, i didn't wanna wake you. plus, you seemed like you needed it"
"fair enough"
by then jay announced dinner was ready so you helped him set the table and sat down for dinner. the noodles he'd made were simply delectable. it reminded you of the way you used to make them with your sister. you mentioned it to him among other compliments
"well, where do you think I got the recipe?" he winked. your mouth fell open. no way.
"i literally love you so much"
"love you too" he replied with his adorable smile
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© mochamvgz on tumblr | all rights reserved | do not plagiarise, repost or translate
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mywitchcultblr · 5 months ago
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I find it amusing how some anonymous users call you a hater and a child throwing a tantrum (as if sending hateful messages wasn't). How can they be so blind to this?
The DLC writing is dogshit at best, and I am being generous. FromSoftware not only butchered Miquella's character but other things too. What happened to him wanting to cure his and Malenia's curse? There's no mention of that. The Haligtree—supposedly a home for the shunned and mistreated? Nothing. Granting Godwyn a true death? Nada. The Eclipse? Pfff. The Outer gods and the unalloyed gold? What about him being Torrent's former master? (As the promotional art implied) And the steed choosing the Tarnished? If I recall correctly, wasn't Torrent meant to pick lords? So this means Miquella trusted Torrent enough to let it choose him a consort, yet our role there is practically non-existent. Besides that, as far as I'm concerned, for one to become a god, one must be in contact with the Elden Ring, such as Ranni did, yet we don't see that in the DLC. And the thing that bugs me the most is Miquella abandoning parts of himself, like his love. Like, yeah, "Age of Compassion," but there's something you need for that and it is, y'know, love??? Where's the sense in that? Wasn't the whole point of him become a god and fix Marika's mess in the Lands Between? Not following her steps.
I'm not even going to mention Radahn because his presence here is as irrelevant as in the game.
THANK YOU ANON! Finally someone with sense! People who are saying "Oh you are just angry because the DLC doesnt confirm your headacanon or expectation." The expectation exist because of hints and lore that already exist in the base game, of course you will want to see the big pay off in Shadow. Imagine if you are Dr. Who fan and seeing 13th Doctor turned into a weeping angel but then in the next episode it doesn't go anywhere and she's immediately fine again
I will list others things that aggravate me about SOTE
The battle between Malenia and Radahn: In the base game, their battle is implied to be over runes, and because he was halting the stars and thus Miquella's fate. Malenia invaded Caelid to get Radahn's rune and solving the halted fate business, while general boi also wanting to accumulate more power so he can be Elden Lord with taking hers. Simple but effective.
But now its over a marriage with Miquella?
While it made sense for him to ally with the Haligtree so Radahn can get into the fast track of becoming Elden Lord through marrying Miquella, there's 0 build up anywhere in the base that will led us to believe Radahn even got to do anything with Miquella.
Also while he is a warmonger and certainly not a good person (I dont care what chuds on reddit said, just because a guy likes his horse that doesnt make him nice, I don't even hate Radahn or anything) he genuinely cares about HIS OWN HOLDING.
Now from what I gather from the DLC, he will agree to become Miquella's consort if he got an epic battle first. So now the motivation for Malenia vs Radahn iconic battle is... It was a deadly sparring ritual before the groom settle down? Radahn can you at least do it in a neutral zone so this battle wont destroy your OWN LAND?! There's no way Radahn didn't know that sparring with Malenia could endanger Caelid, especially with the fact that she has ROT. Radahn might be a brute archetype but he's not stupid, yet this DLC made him looks like an absolute oaf who doesn't care about whatever Caelid will survive or not...
2. Mohg: I always thought he will return, he gives me the vibe of a villain who say "I'll be back!" and I thought there's no way the Formless Mother will allow her champion to die just like that. Yeah he's back but in the worst way possible that will make his fans despairing and his haters say "I hate Mohg but he didn't deserve this."
His arc in the base is good, it is conclusive and it made sense.
A guy who was born hated, abused, and shunned by his own mother decided to say FUCK IT and created his own order, cavorting with an Outer God, committed heresy left and right, then kidnapped his half brother so he can force/convince/manipulate/doing blood ritual whatever so Miquella will make him a consort. Then the Tarnished ruined his plan, killed him. It was a well-rounded arc. Its good enough. I always admired his tenacity to give a middle finger to his family. But now? This weird over engineered brainwashing-kidnapping thing undermined the authority of both Mohg and the Formless Mother. Did she even care about Mohg? Why the Formless Mother didn't try to stop Miquella or at least warned Mohg about it?
And what the fuck Mohg is actually doing down there? What was his plan to elevate his order and replace Marika's? How he will do it if he never wanted to become Miquella's consort? With his drip alone? Maybe there are things that I missed about Mohg's plan in the DLC?? But this DLC narrative now undermined his arc and the Formless Mother.
3. Mesmer: While he is still intriguing and judging from youtube (No i havent reach him personally, because you know I'm busy but I spoiled myself, I always do for something as big as BG3 or Souls) I thought he would play a bigger role in Shadow, but not really? He's kinda overshadowed by Radahn who is not supposed to be there
Also Rellana's existence sounds like a sitcom level plot twist? Its kinda funny LMAO "Oh you think Renalla's boss fight sucks and you think she is weak? HERE WE HAVE HER TWIN SISTER RELLANA! ITS THE UPGRADED VERSION OF CARIA 1.0!" (I do like the expansion and exploration of the Carian's family tho)
4. "What about him being Torrent's former master? (As the promotional art implied) And the steed choosing the Tarnished? If I recall correctly, wasn't Torrent meant to pick lords? So this means Miquella trusted Torrent enough to let it choose him a consort, yet our role there is practically non-existent." : THIS YOU ARE SO RIGHT ANON, Torrent chose the Tarnished and Miquella asked Ranni to give the spirit calling bell to whoever Torrent chose. THAT'S MEAN THE TARNISHED ALREADY HAS A CONNECTION WITH MIQUELLA, I'm willing to bet over my right arm, this Promised Lord that Miquella/Malenia mentioned is either supposed to be Godwyn or THE TARNISHED THEMSELVES!
Look Miquella need a lord strong enough to back his claim and help him to change the world right? Why insisting on chasing after Radahn (that never mentioned to have any connection or alliance with Miquella) WHEN YOU CAN HAVE THE GUY WHO DEFEATED RADAHN AND MALENIA THEMSELVES! The Tarnished is already strong enough to challenge MOTHER FUCKING GODFREY and won! It make 0 sense for us not able to become his consort. What do you mean you can make the dream of a guy who is literally called THE DUNG EATER came true and subjugated everyone into a world of pain because shit eater is an edgelord who thinks omens and their suffering are totally cool, but not MIQUELLA'S? Its so bullshit. In the grand scheme of things, Dung Eater is as relevant as a random Tibia Mariner.
I'm still hoping we can see Miquella's ending, I hope its gonna be added. I saw someone mentioned that there's actually Miquella's ending but not implemented? I hope it can be added and at least some aspect of the missing story/plothole fixed, because Elden Ring 1.0 was quite different than what we have now...
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This guy on reddit also echoed my statement
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5. Godwyn: I don't care what some people said "Oh Godwyn is not supposed to be there, its just your headcanon." Brother... This DLC is about Miquella and Mesmer (even though sadly Mesmer's role seems to be diminished :/) there's should be any mention about Godwyn because Miquella and Malenia loves him very much.
There's a statue of them hugging each other, and if I'm not mistaken there were people who data mined and found tidbits about Miquella trying to resurrect him and there's stuff about Miquella giving up his throne
Show us Miquella failed to resurrect Godwyn, show dont tell! (so it wont impact Fia's ending) or please give us a mentions about him by Miquella, or knights who used to serve pre-dead and rotting Godwyn appearing in Lands of Shadow, something, anything! its like his own family, doesn't give a fuck to solve the problem that his rotting body caused.
6. The gloam eyed queen and Melina: I thought GEQ will be mentioned, since this DLC also delved into Marika's past, I mean GEQ was her rival and she's nearly becoming THE God instead of Marika. But eh nothing about her or Melina :/ Tho I do like tidbits about Marika's past and her village
There's other things... But eh I'm tired of typing lol. I do enjoy Elden Ring, I really do, and I had such a high expectation for SOTE :/ so yeah I became loud about my disappointment because I'm invested
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fallingdownhell · 2 years ago
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Hi!! I hope you're doing well🌸
Can I please request Kyojuro, Tengen, Giyuu and Tanjiro reacting to their s/o taking almost lethal hit? On the battlefield or in hospital butterfly mansion
Thank you <3
Hey! I'm doing good, thank you<3 Hope you are doing fine as well!
Sorry it took so long for me to write your request. Still, thank you for sending in one!
Characters: Kyojuro Rengoku; Tomiyoka Giyuu; Tengen Uzui; Kamado Tanjirou
Content: gender neutral reader; established relationship; blood and injuries; poison; hurt/comfort; not proof read
Word count: 2,4k words
Hope you enjoy reading!<3
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Kyojuro Rengoku
He was out on a mission when he got the message that you were currently at the Butterfly mansion, your condition gradually getting worse
He quickly arranged for some other Slayer to take over for him, then made his way to Shinobu's abode as fast as his feet allowed him to
The entire way over there, he was praying to whoever god was willing to listen to him, that you would get better. That the gods would not take you away from him this early
He knew first hand that the work as a demon slayer was a dangerous one, the impending doom of death always right around the corner for them
every little job, let it be the easiest one on the planet, could lead to their death and everyone was well aware of that
it was precisely for that reason, that Rengoku always thought he would never involve himself in matters of love, the inevitable heartbreak too much for him to handle and he also wouldn't want to put that burden onto anyone else
but as it always is, life got different plans for him, he met you, another fellow slayer, and fell in love with you
Both of you knew about the risks coming with this line of work, so every second spent with the other was the greatest pleasure any of you could ever ask of
Rengoku thought about you the entire way to the butterfly mansion, kept replaying all those happy memories in his head. He couldn't loose you, not yet
When he arrived at the mansion, it was already sunrise. He walked past anyone that came to greet him, he had only two destinations. Your room, and Kocho. Whoever came first didn't matter
And luck seemed to be somewhat at his side, when he saw his fellow Hashira exit a room and taking a deep breath in front of the now closed door
He immediately made his way over to her, asking her about your condition
"They are fine, considering the cirumstances. They lost a lot of blood and almost didn't make it, but they pulled through. Recovery will be long and rough however, so let them rest for now."
Rengoku couldn't even begin to describe the immense feeling of relief that flooded his chest upon hearing this
You would be fine...
He thanked Kocho a good thousand times, before they parted ways and he entered the room you were residing in
You were still unconscious in the bed and you looked pale
He grabbed a chair and placed it next to your bed, gently taking one hand of yours into his, placing a soft kiss to the back
"I'm here, my dear.", he whispered, scared that he somehow could wake you up from your slumber
There were bandages wrapped all around your abdomen, already dyed a red colour again, and you were breathing somewhat heavily
Like Kocho said, you were recovering, but it would be a long road ahead
For the entire time, Rengoku would stay close to you, only accepting missions close by to the butterfly mansion, that he could complete within one day and/or night
The first time you opened your eyes again, he began crying and pulled you into a careful hug
He was so scared.. but now that you're finally awake again, it would only get better..
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Tomiyoka Giyuu
This man...
This man is a hard one to crack
Because, even if he was in love with you, he would not show his infatuation with you in the slightest
partially because he can't imagine that someone like you would ever be interested in him, so he just keeps his thoughts and feelings to himself
You would have to insist, constantly enter his own little bubble he created, for Giyuu to warm up to you
Still, the confessing part would fall onto you, because he would stay silent about his feelings his entire life if he had to
He was surprised when you confessed to him and almost turned you down, one reason being this dangerous job, the other reason that he thought he wasn't good enough for you and that you deserved better than him
But in the end, you managed to convince him, and the two of you were a really happy couple, with Giyuu slowly but surely opening up to you more and more, while becoming a bit more expressive around you
So why was it, that now, as the two of you were tackling a mission together for the hundredth time, you got injured under his watch?
The demon you were fighting was a cunning bastard, using poison to quickly deal with his victims. And somehow, during the hectic of the fight, you got stabbed in the chest and and injected with the poison
As Giyuu saw that, he immediately paniced and rushed to your side, getting you out of the dangerous zone
He wanted to run away with you right here and now, to get you treated as quickly as possible, but he also couldn't let that demon continue to run amok in this city
Luckily, they stayed in relative contact with Shinobu due to the demons choice of weapon
Giyuu quickly shouted orders at his crow, telling it to get her as quickly as possible
In the meantime, Giyuu continued to fight the demon, hoping to take it out soon so he could rush over to Shinobu's estate and meet her halfway
He managed to pull it off and behead that demon after some amount of effort and without getting hit by it, but he didn't have time to breath
Giyuu rushed back to your side, realizing that your breathing got a lot more shallow and with more pauses in between
The panic from before returned with full force and he wasted no more time, quickly rushing to get you the help you needed
Luckily, his crow did it's job very effectively as he met Shinobu half way and they rushed you back to her estate to get you treated
She had to test through quite some antidotes until she finally got the right one, managing to get rid of the poison entirely
After that, you slept for a week straight, not waking up even once. And Giyuu stayed by your side the entire time, only leaving your room to get something to eat or use the bathroom. He was too worried about you to leave your side for any longer
He totally blamed himself that you got hurt this badly, you have to reassure him once you wake up again that it wasn't his fault. But he can't help it, he doesn't ever want to loose you
A lot of crying and a lot of comfort is gonna happen when you open your eyes again, so better prepare for that
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Tengen Uzui
Three wives were already hard enough to keep up with as it is, so Tengen never even considered the possibility of a fourth spouse joining them in their lives
And yet, when you came along, he almost instantly became interested in you
Not only because of your looks, but you were strong as well, despite not being a slayer for very long yet, and he respected that
however, he didn't want to start anything behind his wives backs, so after some time passed where he got to know you even more, worked on some missions with you, he went to the three of them with a proposal
They were surprised to say the least, not expecting that of him, since he never gave them the impression that he was interested in you in that way
But, as it so happened, they didn't mind it all that much. In fact, they were also quite interested in you. So, the four talked about it for some time, before they all approached you together
You were as surprised as Tengen's wives initially were and needed some time to think it through. Though in the end, you agreed and now, it wasn't four anymore, but five
Under his care, you also quickly rose up in the ranks of the demon slayers, making all of them even more proud of you
however, as always in life, it often makes a turn for the worst just when it seems to be going well
on this particular day, Tengen and his wives were out on a mission, leaving you behind to watch after the estate
The job had been easily dealt with thanks to their combined power and they were soon on their way back, ready to reunite with you
but, as they approached their abode in the dead of night, something felt off to them. No lights were to be seen at all in the house, nothing that indicated you were staying in there
Feeling uneasy, they rushed to get back and were shocked, frozen in place as they entered
The entire interior was a mess, it looked like a fight had taken place
they found you in the living room, blood pooling around your body. Your heart was still beating, but it was weak and the blood loss didn't contribute to your well being
"(Name)!", they screamed as they rushed to your side. Makio and Hinatsuru started examining your body, trying to locate the source of your bleeding, while Suma craddled your head in her lap, trying to get you to wake up
She did succeed, long enough at least for you to tell them what had happened here
"(Name)! What happened? Who did that to you?"
"Upper....moon..", was all you managed to get out before you fell unconscious again
Their faces hardened at your words, but quickly shoved that to the backs of their minds. They could deal with that later. Right now, the only thing that mattered was you not dying
Hinatsuru and Makio continued to put pressure on your wounds. It took some time, but eventually, the bleeding got less and less until it died down all together, so they were finally able to wrap you up with bandages
Then Tengen, who until now had made sure that the rest of the house was safe, carefully picked you up. They gathered a few essential items and then made their way towards the headquarters, where they would stay for the time being, since the estate wasn't a safe place anymore, and where you would be treated
Hinatsuru and the others did some good work on you. Thanks to their efforts, you managed to get back on your feet a lot faster than anyone had anticipated, but you were still out of business for a while
Though in the end, you didn't mind that too much if it meant that you still had a life left to live with them
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Kamado Tanjirou
Unlike the other ones, Tanjirou does not have a home base, a place he can always return to when in need of a rest
He is constantly on the move, travelling all over the country, wherever his missions are taking him
he doesn't mind this all that much, though he sometimes misses the comfort of a warm bed that he gets to call his own
however, having you by his side, as you travel with him wherever he goes sure does make it a lot easier
sure he is also grateful to Zenitsu and Inosuke, but it's not the same as with you. You just manage to make him feel better about his situation when he falls into doubt again and he appreciates that very much
so it's understandable that he's absolutely devastated as he witnesses you get injured in front of his eyes, taking a hit that was meant for him when he got distracted for a second
the demons teeth bore into your neck, ripping part of the flesh away and you scream in both sheer terror and pain
you instantly fall to the ground, hand pressing on the wound, trying to keep the blood from coming out, but it's to no use. The bite was too big and you're loosing a lot of blood
Tanjirou, after hearing your agony, slashes at the demon, who jumps back and creates some distance between you and the monster
he looks at the wound and he sees that you're starting to loose consciousness. He knows he has to deal with this demon quickly, otherwise you will die on the spot if you don't get proper care soon. And he absolutely can not let this happen
He asks Nezuko to please help him out and together, they are able to overpower the demon and take him out, but it still took them quite some effort to do so
However, there wasn't much time to celebrate the victory. When he returned to your unconscious body on the floor, a pool of your blood had formed besides your head, your breathing was slow and shallow, as was your heartbeat
There was no time left to waste...
The first thing you noticed upon waking up were the unfamiliar surroundings. This was not a place you have ever visited, a sense of dread starting to creep up in your chest
But then you turned to your side and saw a sleeping Tanjirou next to you, sitting on a chair while his head was resting on your bed. You felt a little more relaxed at the sight, because if he was sleeping here, then that must mean it was a safe place to do so
You smiled and gently shook him a bit, waking him up
Upon realizing that you were awake again, he was ecstatic. He soon told you, that he didn't have the time to get you to the Butterfly estate, so he settled with the local hospital in the city where you were
The staff there was able to take good care of you, your wound was healing nicely and they should be able to release you very soon if you felt up for it
And once you were informed about your condition, Tanjirou then began to profusely apologize to you. After all, that hit was meant for him, not you. He can't even begin to describe how guilty and horrible he feels about it
You have to reassure him that you're fine now and you would gladly take a hit for him again
he brings you in for a gentle hug and you stay like that for a few minutes, just basking in each others presence
After all, you would heal again and be able to tell the tale about how you survived this attack. If that wasn't a story for the books...
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utilitycaster · 8 months ago
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Hi there, I saw in one of your tags recently that "if you think the raven queen was being unfair, I'm not really interested in your opinions." I was wondering if you could talk a little more about that because I'll be honest, Vax isn't my favorite character but I've seen all of C1 and I really don't get why some people HATE the RQ, call her unfair, manipulative and pretty plainly say this moon conflict is mostly her fault because she took Vax and through a Domino effect Ludinus is releasing Predathos. Also, I enjoy your theories and analysis for CR so much you got me listening to Midst, so thank you.
Hi anon,
Great question! This is going to be a very long post, with a relatively short initial answer, because there is both the literal misinterpretation that indicates this is not someone with strong analytical skills nor knowledge of canon, and a number of potential mindsets that lead to this manner of thinking in the first place, none of which I respect. You happen to have sort of hit upon the foundational elements of my whole deal re: CR meta, so, buckle in.
The first part is simple: Vex died because Percy triggered a trap before she'd been healed up. We've seen this sort of trap elsewhere in non-divine contexts (Folding Halls of Halas); it's just a form of trap. A particularly nasty one, but this is for a very powerful relic she doesn't want falling into the wrong hands, and, moreover, the party could have likely disabled it either through rogue skills or magic had Percy waited. Vax, then, as the third part of the resurrection ritual, told the Raven Queen to take him instead of Vex. The Raven Queen did precisely as he asked. He did not need to offer this (Scanlan was going to make an offering, the other parts of the ritual had gone well, it was Vex's first death so the DC was low, and Vax could have made any number of other, less dramatic offers), and he did so with the understanding that he would die in lieu of Vex, right then and there. He did not. I think that's the only case, actually, where the Raven Queen was not 100% upfront with her intentions before Vax accepted something; but he offered it voluntarily. Vax was a person who formed extremely intense connections, to the point where it was perhaps unhealthy, and did not believe life without his sister was worth living, and was willing to sacrifice himself to a god.
Everything after that was extremely straightforward. Vax communed with the Raven Queen, who spoke very directly with him in his vision in the Raven's Crest. She was extremely clear when she met with him following his disintegration: he was given the option to refuse her offer, and he took it instead. It is not manipulative to give someone a difficult decision, and if a character you like makes a choice you don't like, it is not automatically the result of manipulation.
As for the moon conflict being her fault…that is, to put it bluntly, unhinged, and what's more, ironic given that that's the manipulative argument. Ludinus tried to commune with Ruidus using a random crystalline artifact beneath Molaesmyr, centuries before Vax was born. He was going to do this regardless. If he couldn't get Vax, he'd get some other sliver of divinity, and what's more, it's been all but stated that Vax is not actually supposed to be leaving the Shadowfell to protect Keyleth, and is disobeying the Raven Queen directly (and it's been stated that this isn't necessarily helpful for Keyleth, who is trying to grieve and move on). So: Vax made his choices with the knowledge of what they entailed, is trying to bend if not break the conditions to which he agreed with full knowledge in a way that probably isn't healthy for him or Keyleth, and it's bananas to be like "wow look at how the Raven Queen made Ludinus try to free Predathos." Like. Even if she had tricked Vax, which she didn't, Ludinus literally could have just kept on his racist imperialistic longevitymaxxing beat indefinitely and left the moon well enough alone. The domino meme is a meme. I mean, while we're at it, couldn't we trace it back to Vecna instead, for killing Vax with Disintegrate in the first place, since had he not done so, Vax would have either survived that fight or would have been resurrected normally? Or perhaps it's Percy for triggering that trap. Or the Chroma Conclave for being the reason why Vox Machina was seeking the Deathwalker's Ward in the first place…but that only happened because Allura and Kima didn't kill Thordak but rather sealed him, and because a priestess of Melora cursed Raishan so that she had reason to ally with Thordak. We can go on indefinitely; the point is, to assign blame specifically to the Raven Queen when Ludinus literally did not have to do a goddamn thing with the moon is a fucking stupid take.
Below the cut, I talk root causes behind why people might decide the Raven Queen was unfair and come up with the above nonsensical argument to support that, since I don't think people say stupid things just to be stupid.
I think one root cause for this mentality of this is that the person in question wishes Vax hadn't died and is looking for someone to blame because they don't want to blame Matt Mercer and Liam O'Brien, even though yeah, that's who to blame. The thing is, as we learned in Campaign 2, character death is quite literally on the table. Had Vax not made his bargain, either in episode 1x103 or his original one during Vex's resurrection? He might have simply remained dead. Had he not given his life for Vex's, he was pursuing paladin anyway with the Everlight, and we don't know what she'd have required of him. But more importantly, for all people like to bring up a PC-centric perspective (which, in Actual Play, is inevitable) Vox Machina's frequent use of resurrection spells was in fact a massive privilege most people in Exandria do not have. And, unsurprisingly for a table whose DM made up rules specifically to make resurrection more difficult, the Critical Role cast is open to a story where death exists. I do not think it's an accident that resurrection has been made even harder in the subsequent campaigns. I also happen to think that Campaign 1 is a far richer and better story with Vax's death, given the other events that occurred. Had Vax not been the sort of person who would offer his life for a god to take in exchange for his sister? Sure, he'd possibly have lived to the end. But he was, and that's the character those people who wish he were still alive loved. If he wasn't that person, they wouldn't have liked him in the same way.
D&D is fundamentally about exceptional characters becoming more powerful, and will be focused on those characters. I do not think D&D supports a story about characters who reject all power. They can give up political power (the Mighty Nein, for the most part, do this - certainly more so than Vox Machina, and Bells Hells is yet to be seen) but they will progress in levels, which is power. Even if unwanted, it is power, because most people in the world are commoners with 5 HP and 10 in all their stats. With that said, a lot of people desperately want a subversion of this power narrative. Vax is, I think, the closest we get. In D&D you are not going to get a player character who finishes a campaign and remains Just Some Guy. But you can have someone like Vax, who doesn't have any interest in power (compare to Vex, who very much is about power and who gets a much happier ending) who nonetheless ends up on the Tal'Dorei Council and the favored of a god…and yet, in the end, his equally powerful friends still can do nothing to save him. I think a Power Bad story is overly simplistic, but "there are limits to power, and ultimately none of us have complete control" is not. I think Vax's death gives the story of Vox Machina a finality and heft that it would lack otherwise.
A second possible cause is the "What if the gods are BAD" argument. I'm going to be totally honest: I did not see this in the fandom until Campaign 3, and honestly, not until EXU Calamity in any widespread sense, which does lead me to believe that most people did not come up with it as a reasonable idea on their own until characters started saying it, because it is so plainly in conflict with the themes of Campaigns 1 and 2 that to make this argument would be obvious projection. Do I think a nuanced view of the gods as flawed beings, rather than perfection, is warranted? Absolutely. Mortals, too, are flawed, and we don't kill them all for it. I think Vax's story makes them uncomfortable because it makes it clear divine favor is not, as Ludinus Da'leth tries to argue, the gods just bestowing and withholding their gifts arbitrarily, but rather that divine favor comes with a divine responsibility as well. Clerics and paladins do not study the way wizards do; but they must live lives in service, whereas a wizard can shut the book at the end of the day and do whatever. Clerics and paladins have powers that can be taken away; a wizard does not. That's the fundamental concept behind the Age of Arcanum - wizards trying to get around the fundamental rules of this world! Vax's paladin powers came at a price. His options are guided, but also limited, by the oath he took. He is far more fettered than a wizard, in the end, and I think that fucks with the narrative of the gods cruelly withholding their gifts from all but a select few, so they instead make their gifts into manipulative punishments…while still, contradictorily, arguing that characters such as Laudna or Ashton or Imogen were denied the mercy of the gods. Now, setting aside the obvious, that these characters have their backstories because Marisha and Taliesin and Laura decided they would because this is a story, and one in which someone had a perfect life would be boring and so the gods didn't intervene with Laudna because Marisha Ray wanted to play a Sun Tree corpse (see next section), it really is fascinating to see how people who hate the Raven Queen so neatly align with Ludinus. It's fine for sorcerers to have inborn powers, apparently, and Ludinus actually has himself tried to ape druidic magic; it's not about power, it's just about that power source. Honestly, they're not even above the gods as a power source - Ludinus used the crystal beneath Molaesmyr seemingly unaware if it were of the Archheart, and he's demonstrably using Vax, and everyone loves a resurrection from the gods, but heaven forbid you pay someone for the work you feel yourself entitled to. (Entitlement: this will also be a theme throughout the rant portion of this post.)
As a brief subsection to this: the idea that bad things happen to good people because the other side of that coin is free will is an ancient theological and philosophical discussion, and one we are obviously not going to solve here, though it is a little depressing I have had multiple rewarding conversations on this topic, thanks to an academically rigorous religious education, starting from the tender age of 9, and a lot of adults on Tumblr seemingly can't engage on the level of my third-grade classmates. I think, however, it tells a truth that fits in well with the wizard (and entitled fan) desire to control everything. People are terrified of random forces. Cancer, for example, is a matter of probability. There are things that can increase your chances of developing cancer, to be sure, but the simile I used when I was taught about radiation-induced cancers was that of lottery tickets: if you buy more, you have a better chance; but sometimes someone who bought a single ticket "wins" and someone who bought a ticket weekly never does. By believing the gods of Exandria are on trial for not intervening with every little hardship or for not taking Vax precisely as he intended, they reveal a profound terror of random chance and of the free will of people who are not them. Which is very funny when you consider we're watching Actual Play, where random chance is a deliberately induced element. I think the takeaway of all of this is "I think some of you guys are really mad this is a D&D game." But let's continue.
The third, and honestly most likely cause, is honestly sort of a continuation of the first but not centered around Vax so much as just a general, in my opinion deeply childish discomfort of any sort of tragedy or unhappiness in fiction. I've noticed this a lot lately, and I am not a cultural critic and don't have a high enough level view to pretend to be one, but as others have noted a lot of people seem affronted when whatever show they are currently watching does not meet their specific standards of "comfort media" or "hopepunk." It's a self-infantilization I don't care for, and it's certainly not limited to the CR fandom (see: any grown-ass adult passionately defending a choice to only watch children's cartoons and only read YA) or even fandom at all (see: the baffling popularity of the Mr. Rogers "look for the helpers" line which was intended for anxious young children, not for adults who can and should be the helpers). It really came into focus for me with CR when people referred to both EXU Calamity and to Candela Obscura's Circle of Needle and Thread as specifically "hopeless." They are, to me, deeply hopeful series. They are sad, and tragic, and many characters do not get a happy ending, but they are ultimately about how some people will endure, and will live on and find meaning after great loss. Calamity explicitly states that because of the actions of the heroes, while devastation will occur, total annihilation is mitigated. It's like the adage of how courage only means something in the face of fear; hope only means something in the face of darkness. Happy and fluffy tales are not hopeful; they are merely not things that require you to have hope. The root word of catharsis is that of cleansing and purgation and it originally related to physical excretion - cathartic stories are about getting those complicated and ugly emotions and fears out and feeling better for it by briefly feeling, perhaps, worse! Now, again, this has worsened with Vax's story with time. Shortly after Campaign 1, it was very common to see stories where Vex or Keyleth were utterly distraught, indefinitely, but those at least were engaging with grief, even if in a very shallow and unproductive way. But this has morphed into this idea that the fact that a work of fiction might make you even feel sadness makes it bad, and wrong, and hopeless, and the machinations of a cruel and heartless god. Which brings me back to the entitlement narrative: it's really as simple as "the story didn't give me what I wanted (whether that was a happy ending for Vax, or for Keyleth, or just a lack of sadness generally, or a narrative about the gods that validates my personal beliefs, or a way to justify Ludinus's actions), so it is bad." Which again is about being in control of the narrative, which again, in D&D, is simply not something anyone can claim. Why are these people here watching a D&D game? I don't know.
So that's really it: on a basic level, if you think the Raven Queen is unfair, you are profoundly ignorant of canon, so I'm already going to have to fact check anything you cite (if you cite at all), but there's a much deeper refusal to meet stories where they are and expand one's own comfort zone at play, and that means any analysis will never consider the possibility that your pre-existing beliefs were wrong (absolutely crucial in meta). You will always play it too safe and be uninspired and reactionary because the alternative is uncertainty and fear. I think a refusal to embrace tragedy in fiction is itself a profound tragedy; that is someone who is terrified to believe that life goes on.
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thebrookesnook · 1 year ago
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@forfuckssakejim oH LORDY LORD
JWOEKFKKMSKA I JUST READ IT OH MY OH MY
😳🫣😳
Psst. Did you want a sneak peak at the fic? 👀
👀 yes please
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nerdalmighty · 8 months ago
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hey! so, i just recently started playing baldur's gate 3 after seeing people put it all over my dash for months--and you're one of the people i've seen reblogging a lot of posts about it LOL. so if you don't mind me asking, i was wondering what kind of character do you/did you play as? and do you have any sort of backstory for your tav that you'd like to share?
Hoooooooooooooh my god thank you so much for asking. I have a friend who comes over to watch me play on Thursdays and I make a powerpoint every week to catch her up on what she missed - this week's powerpoint literally has slides about my Tav's background (more on those later). This is about to be long, I'm about to drop ALL my lore so buckle up! AND THANK YOU FOR PUTTING UP WITH MY BG3 BRAIN WORMS!!!!! I'm glad they convinced you to play 😈
So to begin, I've been in my first ever dnd campaign with a group of friends for a little over a year now. I didn't know much about Baldur's Gate except that it was a dnd video game and that you could romance people. Me, being a Big Fan of Romance And Fantasy was like "okay well I'm in" and my friend actually let me start a game at his house. Through that, I met Shadowheart, Gale, and Astarion.
Backing up a bit to my character; I decided I'd put my character from my irl dnd campaign into the game since I already knew her whole deal. I get pretty overwhelmed with making decisions, ESPECIALLY with big open world games like bg3, so knowing who/what I wanted to be really helped me out.
In the campaign I'm in with friends, it's pirate themed, and I play a half-elf bard named Birdie Harp who's secretly half-siren (murder mermaid). To make a long story very short, she was born in the arctic and escaped her murderous pod during a coming-of-age trial where she also lost her siren abilities (hypnotizing voice, breathing underwater, etc).
I've watched a ton of Dimension 20 which is an actual play show on Dropout.tv (an "actual play" is where you watch other people run a campaign of dnd - like Critical Role, which a lot of people have at least heard of - HIGHLY recommend Dimension 20, as I find it incredibly funny and easier to get into than CR because of the episode lengths), and I knew that I really liked the silliness and theatricality of the bard class. I also loved the bards from The Owl House which helped influence my decision as well.
To be honest, Birdie is my first ever dnd character, so she's basically a self insert but with a MUCH more traumatic backstory than me (this IS dnd after all). As for the half-elf aspect, it was more of an "I want to be half mermaid, what's similar to that?" as opposed to a love for half-elves or something.
BACK TO BALDUR'S GATE - knowing I wanted Birdie to be in the game, I felt a lot less overwhelmed to come up with something entirely new - I knew a lot about the bard class having played one so I wanted to CONTINUE playing one (and I've learned even more since playing bg3!).
When I finally got my own game (I no longer play at my friend's house, but in the comfort of my own home), I recreated Birdie and started on my journey in earnest. I'm VERY MUCH someone who likes to be in control and know what to expect, so I've had guides and walkthroughs to help me the whole time - SUE ME! When it came to first meeting Shadowheart, Gale, and Astarion back at my friend's house, Gale actually immediately stole my heart - a kind, witty wizard who likes books and cats? Literally say less. I went home from that session with my friend fully thinking I'd be a Gale girlie until I really looked into the other options and saw The Vampire.
Blah blah blah, he's hot and funny, but he can also be incredibly soft, which really won me over in the end. So I've been romancing That Guy.
Through Acts 1 and 2, I wasn't all too sure about this version of Birdie's background - sure she COULD still be that half-siren from the arctic, but the game kept suggesting she was FROM Baldur's Gate. I LOVED the inclusion of the harpies in Act 1 and thought maybe that was a viable entry point for her backstory, but so far, she was kind of just... me? She was making the choices I wanted to make (and a few that I knew Astarion would like lmao), but she wasn't really her own entity apart from me except for her name. She also felt vastly different from that character I'd created for my friends over a year ago. For instance, my irl Birdie currently has a crush on a Gale-type character, but this Birdie is ass deep in Astarion (hey, sorry I said "ass deep in Astarion"). The thing I love about Baldur's Gate 3 is how you can really come up with your own backstories, since the in-game one for your Tav is so vague. It's totally fine to ignore tiny details in the game and mold them to your own headcanons for your Tav, but I was so unsure of what I wanted for this Birdie that I kind of internalized that she was from Baldur's Gate.
HEADS UP! The following has some spoilers for Act 3 and some side quests, so STOP reading if that's something you'd care to avoid (the last 3 paragraphs of this post are SAFE from spoilers):
When Act 3 finally rolled around (which is where I am currently, I only have the one playthrough so far because I become INCREDIBLY attached to things), I stumbled across the Water Queen's House in Baldur's Gate. Ah ha! Now this felt promising.
A temple dedicated to the Vengeful Sea Goddess, Umberlee, and her loyal Wave Servants to serve her. It's ocean themed, it has mermaid undertones, and their goddess is basically evil. Seems like the perfect place to FINALLY insert this version of Birdie. I wasn't 100% sure until I completed the Iron Throne mission and was faced with either handing a (mostly) innocent man over to the Wave Servants, or fighting to defend him.
Here are a few of the slides from this week's powerpoint that I mentioned all the way back at the start, starting with SOME background on the Wave Servants:
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Ass and Shart are what I affectionately call Astarion and Shadowheart (Also I got this beautiful "Birdie" art on Pinterest which originated from someone named Dantrelium on Reddit):
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Apologies for the small text here, but there are some more details about THIS Birdie here, which I literally made up/figured out earlier this week:
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Essentially, this Birdie was born at the Water Queen's House as Kittiwake Crest - Kittiwakes are common arctic birds, which I thought would be a nice little homage to the original character she was based off of. She was raised by the collective of Wave Servants there, the main one being Flood Tide Allandra Grey who seems to be head honcho at the Wave Mother's House (in this reality, she is).
Since Umberlee is such a vengeful goddess, I imagine she asked her Wave Servants to commit unspeakable acts in her name, mainly drownings, which THEY see as merciful, but I think Birdie always saw as horrifying. Who were they to decide the fates of others? I also think that the Wave Servants themselves were abusive during her upbringing to keep her in line (but much like how Nocturne was a light in the darkness for Shadowheart, I don't think EVERY Wave Servant was evil). GOTTA have a classic tragic backstory.
Upon researching Umberlee, I learned that most of her servants are clerics, so in my mind, that means Birdie was raised to eventually become one, with her official title eventually going to be "Seawind Kittiwake Crest." Is she still half-siren/mermaid though? Not entirely sure. This IS a magical world though, so I'd be inclined to say yes, probably.
But when we first meet the Wave Servants, they're singing beautifully for their drowned sister, Holli. I think Birdie REALLY loved music and singing with her sisters and secretly trained herself in bard magic when she should have been learning to be a cleric. It's also a classic trait of bards to hide their pain through humor, so I often imagine the type of stupid things Birdie gets up to to bring herself joy (my favorite headcanon being when you meet Skittle the Rat in Wyrm's Rock prison - he's a rat merchant who speaks exclusively in puns. I think Birdie and Gale would excitedly throw puns back and forth with Skittle while Astarion and Shadowheart begrudgingly (and affectionately) roll their eyes in the background).
Another thing I love about the game is how you can string together your own ideas of how companions react to things between big cut scenes. For example, in my head, in my game, Astarion has really become a Big Softy thanks to how fucking Stupid (affectionate) Birdie acts in life and has drawn him out of his shell, but also runs a tag team scam with her where she plays her lute to distract people while he loots an entire place. Gale is Birdie's partner in crime when it comes to tomfoolery and loves to joke and fool around with her (so long as it goes easy on his knees). And Shadowheart is basically a sister figure who flip flops between sassing with Astarion and joining in on the fun. THEY'RE JUST THE BEST, OKAY? OF COURSE I'M GONNA WALK AROUND WITH A BUNCH OF IDIOTS. I LOVE THEM.
Anyway, back to Birdie's backstory: she always hated the atrocities that were asked of her, and she was looking for a way out, but was too scared to take that step and leave since the Wave Mother's House is all she's ever known. One night, while stepping out to quietly dip her toes in the water, the Mindflayers captured her, and that's where we start Act One, all the way up on the Nautiloid. She changed her name to Birdie to distance herself from her previous life, fully took up the bard class, and the rest is history.
Back to that dilemma with handing over that (mostly) innocent guy or fighting the Wave Servants: with encouragement from the party, they convince Birdie to face her traumatic upbringing and fight the Wave Servants once and for all. At this point in Act 3, she's basically helped every single person with their problems except her own. Here's another slide featuring Ass and Birdie:
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That's right folks, Birdie faced her past! But the bad news is we don't get to see Astarion in this (audio from The Adventurous Adventures of One Direction):
(Video description - Astarion from Baldur's Gate 3 wearing the Wave Mother's Armor with the following audio:
Guard 1: Whoa, check it out.
Guard 2: Hubba hubba hubba.
Gaurd 1: Nice. I love dudes in skirts.
END VIDEO.) I don't want to tell you how many times I recorded that until I felt like I got it right lol. Also yes, I DID do a scum save where I handed the guy over ONCE just so I could see Ass in this outfit, but Birdie did canonically save Redhammer in my actual save file.
And honestly, that's BASICALLY it for now! My most recent save was after that battle, so I need to figure out if Birdie's going to go back with her party to confront the rest of (or most of) the Wave Servants, or if this chapter of her life is closed.
In an ideal world I'd LOVE to make one of those artsy gif edits of my Tav like this and this, but PS5s make it hard to download clips without uploading them to YouTube first which I don't really want to do.
Thank you SO MUCH for this ask, I had a blast writing it!! Sorry it's so long, I just love this game so much and LOVE talking about it. Please feel free to ask more questions OR chat with me about YOUR Tav! I'd love to hear all about them :)
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ariiadnes · 2 months ago
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╭ ⿻ ・ SPINE BREAKER
YOU CLAIM THE SAINT , BUT IT'S THE SINNERS YOU NEED.
-ˋ ♡ ◞ ada wong. resident evil 4 remake. quote cr : the rigs. repost.
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there is a betrayal and loyalty that lies in wait : a siren, an alluring, and something entirely human beneath it all. you do not understand ada, know her heart to be ruthless and kind all at once. it is a mess of oppositions, oxymorons, and unease and suspicion, yet there is a strange comfort in the knowing of her existence, even if it may be through superficial means.
you feel something : a presence, distinct, a shift in the air, a foreshadowing of what's to come, and there is something that jolts through your body, alerts you of an incoming danger. suddenly close, then gone. fleeting.
cool metal against your skin. you recognize this sensation all too well. your breath hitches, but you force yourself to forget fear. a smile falls upon your lips ; you tilt your head up, almost lazily, raise both of your hands in seemingly polite surrender.
"your hands aren't shaking this time. you're getting better at this."
"thank you, lovely ada. i'm trying."
your eyes meet. your jaw clenches, and she notices this. you're on edge, right where she wants you. her visage is unreadable, almost cold, but the lightest of smiles graces her lips, amusement in brown eyes. the blade no longer meets flesh, but one wrong move and it could lead to your end.
"lovely?" she tilts her head, plays up that feign curiosity. "cute nickname."
"a generous one, really." your hands fall to your sides. you don't plan to hurt her, just as she doesn't plan to hurt you. "you can put down the knife, you know. there are better ways to announce yourself. like saying hi, for example."
"meet and greet isn't my style." steel against delicate skin. pressure. she leans forward ever so slightly, that familiar smirk blossoming on red hues. it's almost too close for comfort yet not enough-- the way her lips are only inches from yours. and she stays there, waits. she's thinking. watching. "you'll get used to it."
you hold your breath instinctively, but she notes the way you swallow hard, divert your gaze. you're neither relieved nor resentful at this little reunion, and in truth, you've hit a wall in the mission, found yourself at a loss. she always knows more than she lets on. she could help you-- if she wanted to.
the pressure eases. the air shifts once more, twists from a taunting to something almost somber. she puts the knife down once you force your gaze back onto her, turns on her heel and starts to walk. with a delicate lift of the hand, she gestures you to follow, doesn't even bother to see if you'll chase after her.
she knows you will. you always do.
"you're coming with me." the words are flat, but a sense of command lingers. "need to borrow you real quick. don't worry," she begins offhandedly, looking over her shoulder with an all too amused countenance, "i'll bring you back to leon. he'll learn how to survive a few minutes without you."
you almost choke on your saliva. you clear your throat, albeit a little more dramatically than intended as if to disregard your shock at the last few sentences. oh, you really missed her and didn't miss her. you stay in place, weigh your options. you could make a breakthrough in this operation, find out additional information from her, or you could continue to go in circles, endless, and end up in this hellhole for longer than either one of you would like.
you close your eyes, pinch the bridge of your nose, swallow the fragments of remaining pride and frustration. god, you hate it here. you do. but you choose to follow her anyway, steps slow and heavy, pretend you don't see the way she smiles once you get moving.
( you need her just as much as she needs you, and you both know this. )
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dilvuc · 2 years ago
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their last argument w/ you
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❥part 1
❥characters: zhongli, xiao, ayato
❥plot: (characters) reacted to the news of male!reader passing away after a huge argument and their last words to the reader was something really hurtful
❥genre: angst
❥gender: male
❥warning: mentioned of death
❥requested by: anonymous
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zhongli 
zhongli was giving you the silent treatment. you two don't argue with each other, but this isn't the first you two had got into this situation.
childe invited you to the liuli pavilion for dinner with the traveler and paimon, but dinner was awkward when you two were giving each other a silent treatment.
"You can't stay angry forever, you know? It's not like it's very important." You sighed, taking a sip of your booze.
"…" zhongli didn't reponsed.
"Quit acting like a child and just forget about it." You scolded lightly, but Zhongli still didn't respond. "..."
"Uh…so, how was your trip?" childe asked awkwardly.
"..."
"Are those two in the middle of a quarrel?" paimon sweatdropped.
"I…It never happened before. I've never seen Mr. Zhongli so angry…" childe whispered to Paimon.
"...Very well…I will take my leave. Enjoy your dinner without me." you said calmly before walking off.
"Mr. [Y]! Wait!" paimon called out for you, but you chose to ignore it.
zhongli sends you a worried glance. he has this bad feeling that he's going to regret this. worried, he thinks about how he's going to apologize to you by tomorrow.
the next day…
zhongli woke up to see that you didn't return home last night after dinner, making zhongli more concerned about your condition.
 
the former geo archon sat alone at the dining table and waited for you until a knock on the door interrupted his breakfast. he was hoping that it was you, but unfortunately it wasn't you. it was lumine, paimon, and childe.
"Oh, it's you three. Not today. I'm not in a mood for wine." zhongli sighed as he's about to close the door, but childe stopped him from closing the door with a big frown on his face.
"We have…some bad news…" childe mumbled.
"...? Why are you telling me?" zhongli questioned.
"...W-well, we received something from the restaurant this morning about the waiter who works there." lumine mentioned. "A report that he poisoned the booze that…Mr. [Y] was drinking…"
"...Come on now. [Y] is Lucas, the Bringers of The Light. He is immune to poison." zhongli chuckled nervously.
"..." the trio stood quiet.
"...Right…?" zhongli asked with worry, already feeling his heart thumping. "Please don't make that face. I'm curious. Is he alright…?"
"We're sorry…"
zhongli gasped and slowly backed away, "T…that's not true. There is no way…"
why did such a small argument turn into a big tragic end for you?
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xiao
you were pissed off at how aggressive xiao is. the argument just happened so fast, but it was later cut short after xiao just walked off from the argument.
although, xiao wished that the argument never happened and he wished that he was able to protect you on time, but he was too late.
"Why did it have to end this way…?" xiao gritted his teeth, holding onto your lifeless body. "We have an argument for nothing…"
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ayato
"Can you be any more reckless?" ayato argued with you as he followed you in the hall. "How could you put yourself up for this?"
"Shut up. Why complain about shit? I'm only gonna face Raiden Shogun myself." you mentioned.
"That's the problem! If you go face her alone, you won't survive! Just think!" ayato complained.
the argument begins after thoma escapes raiden shogun's grasp, thanks to the traveler. you wanted to head over and seek revenge because you had enough of the vision hunt. you will take the matter in your own hands, but ayato couldn't let you do it on your own because he's afraid of losing you.
"Are you saying that I'm not strong enough! I'm strong enough to take her out just like I take out Sara!" you snapped.
"...I'm saying this is a death wish! Just because you take out Sara doesn't mean you can take out the god of eternity!"
"Screw this argument! I don't have time for this crap!" you finished before heading out of the shrine, ignoring ayato yelling your name.
"[Y]! [Y]!" ayato cried out, but you were already gone. "...That idiot…Why is he…?"
an hour later, ayato thought you would come back safe and sound and gave up, but you haven't returned back home. he was going to go out and look for you, but it was until he received devastating news from his sister, ayaka. there were no signs of you, except a broken katana was in his sister's palm.
"...Why are you giving me this…?" ayato asked with a forceful smile. "This isn't [Y]'s katana, is it?"
"..."
"Is it?!"
"...He passed after his loss in battle with the god of eternity…" ayaka quivers her lips. "...There's nothing but his katana…in a bad shape…"
"..." ayato fell to his knees, staring devastatingly before breaking down.
an instant regret. why didn't he just go after you? why didn't he just let you off? why? why? why?
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➳ masterlist
➳ rules
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charliedawn · 2 years ago
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Baldwin IV x Reader x Tiberias
I just watched the movie Kingdom of Heaven and inspiration struck me. ⚡⚡⚡Also, I decided to give the reader the same power than in the movie the Green Line. Enjoy.
Synopsis : You are a mystic healer and the news of your arrival in the kingdom of Jerusalem catches the attention of many people—including the closest advisor of king Baldwin IV: Tiberias.
Warning : LONG !
Baldwin IV had lost all hope on finding a cure for his leprosy. He had come to Jerusalem to find salvation, and maybe a bit of the grace of God. But, he had eventually given up, as he didn't think the Merciful had any mercy left in Him to give..Tiberias had noticed his loss of spirit and even though he had desperately sought for medicine and all kinds of magic to heal his majesty, none had proven worthy of his interest..until now.
Tiberias was taking a stroll along the streets of the market place when he saw a little boy begging on the side of the road. Tiberias then noticed his empty glassy eyes and shuddered. A blind one.
He knelt beside the boy and sighed before throwing a couple of golden coins in his ceramic pot. Poor boy made him think of his sick king and he couldn't help but feel pity for him. The boy smiled and extended his hand to touch the man's face, he ran his fingers along the scar on his face and yet, his smile didn't vanish as he said.
"Thank you, kind one."
Tiberias stood still for a second—stunned that the boy spoke his language—before nodding in acknowledgement. The boy couldn't see it, but he had this feeling that he knew. He then stood back to continue on his way to the house of the one they called "Almaealij Aleazim". The Great Healer. Some of the citizens of Jerusalem had pretended your powers to be unbounded and if the legends were true ? You could very well be the very thing the king needed..He stopped in front of an old tent where people were already waiting and he recognized one of the ones waiting in line to be Guy of Lusignan. Guy—who seemed rather in a foul mood—as he yelled at the two men guarding the door of your house.
"WHAT DO YOU MEAN I NEED TO WAIT IN LINE ?! DON'T YOU KNOW WHO I AM ?! I AM THE FUTURE KING !" Tiberias gritted his teeth at his words and his hand itched for his sword, but he succeeded in remaining calm. He only stood aside undetected until Guy huffed and walked away.
"Whatever. It's obvious the Great Healer isn't here today. I'll go find them myself !"
The oaf had a point. The people seemed to have been waiting for a while and there was absolutely no sign of life inside the building the two men were guarding..He then asked one of the people waiting in line about it, an old woman with a toothy grin who answered him.
"~Oh. Almaealij Aleazim doesn't appear to the ones with a foul heart. Only the worthy may lay there eyes on her..Besides, many of the ones waiting here are people wishing to thank her for her services.."
Tiberias nodded understandingly as he gave a quick glance at the people waiting and indeed found them with their arms filled with gifts. However, he suddenly heard a distant scream and the familiar name being repeated over and over.
"Almaealij Aleazim ! Almaealij Aleazim ! Help me ! Please !" He recognized the earlier young boy's voice and trudged back towards the market place. He then saw that Guy had him raised in the air by the collar, the coins he had given him earlier in his hand.
"Where did you get those, you little thief ?! You stole them. Admit it !"
The boy desperately tried to escape his tight grip as he shook his head vividly.
"NO ! Please ! No thief ! The kind one gave them to me !"
Guy snarled mockingly at the young boy's words before putting the coins in his pocket.
"Yeah..Right. I'm taking you to jail, you lying scum." The sight of the boy in tears made Tiberias' blood boil in his veins as he once against brushed his fingers over the hilt of his sword. He had sworn to value all lives, but he wouldn't mourn too much the loss of this cruel simpleton.
He was about to step in when the crowd split to let someone else through, a young woman who seemed to be walking on air as no dust rose from each step she took. Guy was taken aback by the sudden apparition and quickly let go of the boy who fell to the floor. The boy then quickly got back on his feet and reached forward for the woman who took him in his arms. She then knelt beside the boy and gently stroked his bruised cheek before she started humming to soothe him. Tiberias frowned in confusion at the scene, but decided to stand down and let the action unfold. He hid from sight as the woman's humming started morphing into words the crowd followed. She sang to him and suddenly, the young boy's eyes lit up and a sort of gray smoke rose up in the air and the young woman opened her mouth to breathe it in.
The boy suddenly seemed to see and his eyes watered as he blinked repeatedly at the woman. He then fell on his knees and started praying to her in his native tongue for the miracle. The woman smiled tenderly at him, but was then surprised as the rest of the people around started dropping everything to fall on their knees and pray to her.
Tiberias' eyes widened in shock and the sight alone seemed to break the crusaders out of their daze. Suddenly, Guy of Lusignan drew out his sword and yelled.
"DEMON ! SHE IS A DEMON !"
Before Tiberias could stop them, some of the crusaders drew out their swords as well and tried to attack the girl, but the crowd closed like the red sea with the Egyptians, making a human barrier to protect the woman. However, Guy who was the closest still managed to make his way to them and rose his sword to slam it down mercilessly on both the woman and the child. Tiberias decided to act quickly and used a nearby cart to jump to their rescue. Their swords clashed and Guy glared at Tiberias as he spat hatefully.
"WHY ARE YOU SIDING WITH THE DEVIL, TIBERIAS ?!" Tiberias used his leg to swipe the other man off his feet before positioning the tip of his sword just above the man's throat.
"The only devil I see is currently at my feet."
Guy clenched his teeth together and even though Tiberias wanted nothing more than to plunge his sword deep into the traitor's guts..He held back. He took a step backwards and looked back at the boy and the woman. The woman's eyes rested on him for a few seconds, her head tilted a little to the side as she scrutinized him and seemed to ponder on his intentions. Tiberias sighed before looking at the dark alleys significantly, away from prying eyes. The woman followed his eyes and nodded understandingly before carrying the young boy in her arms and running in the direction the soldier had pointed her to. Tiberias followed them with his eyes until they were out of sight and then, the crowd seemed to dissipate. When the crusaders finally succeeded in making their way through, you were gone.
Back at the castle :
Guy of Lusignan hadn't lost any time before complaining to the king about Tiberias' conduct. But, king Baldwin IV who was used to Guy of Lusignan's bratty behavior didn't as much as blink at the news. However, he did find it rather odd that his most trusted friend would engage into hand combat to save the woman's life. When Tiberias was summoned, king Baldwin IV waved Guy out of the room dismissively. Guy glared one last time at Tiberias on his way out, but didn't say anything—afraid of what the king might do if he heard him.
Once he was out of the room, Baldwin leaned back and let out a strangled moan at the incredible effort it took for him to move only the slightest. His eyes then rested upon Tiberias' figure, standing tall and fierce, even though his face was facing the floor in respect. Tiberias had always been by Baldwin's side and there was no one Baldwin trusted more. So, he asked.
"Guy told me something interesting. He spoke of a demon wearing a woman's face. A succubus that you apparently defended ?"
Tiberias nodded before replying.
"Yes, my king. But, I don't think she is a demon. They call her Almaealij Aleazim. The Great Healer.", he clarified and Baldwin hummed thoughtfully before remembering some of the servants talking in the shadows, of things they thought he couldn't hear neither understand. It wasn't the first time he had heard of this 'Almaealij Aleazim'. He did have a few of his soldiers knock at her door, but none of them had ever succeeded in catching her——until now.
She was like a mirage of sand and it brought Baldwin to think of her as a mere legend than an actual person. But now, he had the confirmation of her existence and the thought alone made him reconsider the finality of his condition.
"And you believe she could help me ?", king Baldwin asked and Tiberias remained silent. He hoped. He still held that tiny light within him that the city might survive if Baldwin was still there to guide it.
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"She healed a child from his blindness with a simple touch. I believe that if there is anyone who can do it, it's her.", he said hopefully—making sure not to mention how she had actually sucked the illness out of him. He wouldn't disclose anything that would make his majesty suspicious, or lose himself into despair. However, it was true Tiberias had no idea of who or what you were..He only had the certitude you could help his king's situation.
"Fine..Bring her to me then.", Baldwin ordered and Tiberias opened his mouth to tell him there was little chance you would agree to meet with him after today's events, but only nodded shortly instead. He had saved you, maybe would you recognize him as "worthy" ? He then walked out of the room and Baldwin looked out at the sun slowly but surely making its course down the horizon. He had no illusion on the probability of a recovery. He knew his chances to be closest to none, but he was intrigued. He had but weeks to live at most, he would make the best out of them and try every single cure there is known to man.
For unlike many of his people who believed him to have given up on life, he had yet to welcome death. Maybe would she greet him with open arms ? Maybe would she even end up being the only friend he might endlessly rely upon ? But, for now, he would await her with apprehension and could only hope their meeting to be as far as possible..
On the market place at night :
Tiberias had decided to return to the market place, wondering if he might spot a hint as to your whereabouts ? He didn't bring his soldiers, as he was convinced you to be harmless. You seemed afraid this evening, as any human of death. And besides, you might be a little more willing to talk to him alone.
He took a stroll around the city and marveled at the silence reigning over the shadows. He suddenly stopped and closed his eyes, appreciating the quiet and serene atmosphere. However, the moment was quickly broken as he heard a noise behind him. He spun around, sword at the ready, only to be met with the boy from the market. His deep brown eyes now staring at him and a large grin on in his face. He didn't say anything, but he gestured for Tiberias to follow him. Before Tiberias could answer, he started running ahead and didn't leave Tiberias the time to think before running after him.
Tiberias ran past familiar alleys and tried to call for the boy to slow down, but suddenly stopped as he saw his guide enter the same door he had seen this morning. Indeed, unlike this evening, a light shone on the second floor and there was sign of life inside the building. However, Tiberias felt suspicious as the two earlier bodyguards were missing and he feared it to be a trap. But, before he could reconsider, the boy's head peaked from behind the door and gesture once more for him to follow him. Tiberias took a deep breath and thought of his king who needed immediate care. He couldn't leave, he couldn't return empty-handed. He then took a step forward and finally stepped over the threshold of the impressive building.
The boy was waiting for him on the other side and as soon as he was inside, the boy quickly climbed up the stairs. He didn't make the gesture to follow him this time around, as he surely must have understood that Tiberias wouldn't be going anywhere now. He stepped up the stairs, still careful as he found it weird not to find any servant or other form of life than his and the little boy's so far.
However, once he reached the second floor, he found you sitting at a low table, a cup of tea in hand as you silently waited for him to enter. Once he was in the room, you took a sip of your drink before raising your eyes to look at him, the same scrutinizing stare he had been subjected to during your first encounter was now back on him.
However this time, you smiled and invited him to sit in front of you—another fuming cup already waiting for him. He hesitated for a mere second before indulging and sat down in front of you, taking a small sniff of the drink that smelled like roses, jasmin and various spices he couldn't put a name on.
He took a sip.
"Are you...the healer ?", he asked hesitantly and you smiled once more—your smile felt like melted honey and Tiberias felt out of place. He was surrounded by delicate things; colorful mosaics, sophisticated tapestries and the sweet fragrance of sugar and spice..You were in a simple dress, your hair wild and free falling on your back and shoulders in complete disarray. You had various tattoos covering your arms and legs and small leather bracelets with little bells and pearls around your wrists. You even smelled like flowers. He—in contrast—was dressed in his armor and probably reeked sweat and filth. He almost felt ashamed. Almost.
"Indeed, I am. State your business, kind one.", you answered.
That nickname. It was the same than the one the kid had called him earlier. He now knew why he had been allowed a private visit, the child must have told you about him. He might try to give him a few golden coins later and send food to his family.
"I am in dire need of a healer.", he decided to confess and you hummed absent-mindedly before your eyes laid in an unhurried fashion upon him once more.
"I can see that. You—sir Tiberias—look like a man who has lost a lot..", you answered with a small knowing smile and Tiberias' brow furrowed for a second at your enigmatic words before he quickly clarified.
"I am afraid I haven't made myself clear enough. I do not want a healer for myself, but for my king. He is incredibly sick and needs your help." You hummed once more, finishing the tea in your hands while Tiberias hadn't touched his since his first sip.
"If he is the one in need of healing, why did he send you in his stead ? Why isn't he the one sitting in front of me ?"
Tiberias' jaw went slack at your sheer cheek and imagined his king, all covered in bandages and his face gnawed by disease and cursed to have every single one of his movements be a pain..To make the trip alone could have cost him his life.
He shook his head.
"My king is fair. He would compensate you righteously..", he replied instead and you closed your eyes.
You sighed. Here it was. Many of the people who came to seek your help brought up money and other kinds of physical treasures, as if it would make their torment any more important and urgent as the rest of the city.
"I'm afraid there is nothing I can do. Sometimes, people just die..", you replied coldly and Tiberias' jaw clenched at your refusal. He didn't want to force you, but he had practically raised the boy who was now called the Leper King and he would be damned if he let you walk away with the knowledge you could have helped.
You stood up and were about to leave when Tiberias suddenly turned around to catch your arm.
"Please. You owe me as much." You looked at the fingers wrapped around your wrist and the clear desperation in his eyes made you soften and sit back down. He nodded gratefully at you.
However, now that Tiberias had your full attention, he still seemed uncertain as to how to convince you. He had an undying loyalty for his majesty that had been built on years of service, but you didn't know the king as much as he did. He had nothing that he thought could persuade you, you weren't linked, and you had never even met. King Baldwin and himself had thought you to be a legend for so long, he hadn't even considered the way he would convince you.
Violence was out of the question.
Not only was he against it for moral reasons, he also knew that if he were to touch a single hair on your body, it would inevitably lead to the uprising of the people of Jerusalem.
So, he sought a different approach, to know more about you and maybe try to reach an understanding.
"You are miraculous. You heal. I've seen it with my own eyes. You don't ask anything in return, and yet, you are still a beggar. Why is that ?"
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He wasn't fooled by the beauty of the house, he knew first and foremost what real luxury looked like. However, as a healer with powers such as yourself, why did you settle for less ? He knew many lords and influential people who would cover you in gold and diamonds for your talents. Your eyes darkened as the night seemed to gain territory inside your home.
"My gift is not to be used for money or glory, my lord. But, it doesn't mean I am not a human being in need of food and shelter."
Your fingers wrung together on your lap as you thought back on the terrible and uncomfortable memories of what powerful men had done to possess you. It had never ended well for any of them. You had sworn to never use your powers on such men ever again.
He could understand that.
"I can assure you that my king is different.", he tried to convince you and you bit your lower lip in order not to let out an undignified snort. All of the people who had ever attempted to gain your services had guaranteed you of their relative's/friend's/master's good will. It was the very reason you had first found yourself trapped in Jerusalem in the first place..
"I can see your love for him.", you still conceded and took a minute to ponder before adding. "Fine. If you swear to protect me, I will help your master, kind one.."
Protect you ? You could see the puzzlement in his eyes and let out a humorless chuckle. Of course, he wouldn't know..You wordlessly stood up and lifted your skirts. Tiberias instinctively looked away, but you called his name and he had no choice but to look. And what he saw made his eyes grow wide as big angry scars ran up your ankles and legs. He looked up quizzically at you and you answered his silent question.
"Men have enslaved me. I had to break my own legs to free myself. You must understand that I do not wish such fate to befall me once more, yes ?"
He felt his throat go dry at the sight and his lips tightened into a thin line as he thought of you—writhing in pain as you used a hammer to break free from your chains. He remained impassive as you covered your scars once more and as soon as your hands were free, he took one of them and rested his forehead upon it before proclaiming.
"As long as I'll live, you shall not be harmed."
You were surprised by Tiberias' sudden oath, but welcomed it nonetheless. You smiled sweetly down at him and took his chin between your thumb and index to make him look up at you as you answered.
"I will be there tomorrow. Prepare my arrival at your king's table beside you and I shall be there."
You brushed his cheek with your fingertips and Tiberias instinctively closed his eyes at the soft gesture.
When he opened them again, he was back in his bed and took a long inhale, the scent of jasmin and orange blossom still remaining. He knew it couldn't have been a dream. He still felt your touch the sensation of your almond eyes on him..He took a big breath before looking out the window at the moon bathing the darkness with its soft glow.
In the morning, he would inform his majesty of their upcoming guest..
At lunch the next day :
Preparations had been made to accommodate your arrival and as instructed, you were to be seated beside Tiberias and the king. However, the dinner went on and the more the clock ticked and the more he felt foolish..Had it all been a dream ? Had he really imagined your whole conversation and warned the king of your oncoming visit unjustly so ? But, the king didn't seem upset.
He was playing with his cup and staring at the wine dancing inside. To be truthful ? He was glad to be allowed outside, even for a little. He felt cramped in that big room of his, suffocating and trapped. He welcomed the distraction, but Guy had to shatter his illusion of a normal king sharing a meal with his subjects by speaking up.
"I ask for retribution. Tiberias interfered with my capture of the succubus. I would have been able to bring her to you, if it hadn't been for him.." He pointed his finger at Tiberias accusatively and even though the king didn't seem to pay the fool's words any mind, Tiberias felt his honor tainted by such accusation.
"She wouldn't have been captured. She would have been dead. And the poor child with it.", he rebutted and Guy lowered his accusative finger to snarl spitefully.
"She is a succubus. Things like her do not die. As for the child ? Everything to make his majesty feel better again. It would have been a necessary evil.", Guy advanced and Tiberias narrowed his eyes at him. Guy had never once put his majesty's well-being before his own and the way he was evading his gaze confirmed what Tiberias had always suspected. The only reason Guy had decided to track you down was to make sure nothing would stop him from taking the throne, once Baldwin buried deep under the earth..
The tight grip he had on his empty cup was the only thing preventing him from drawing out his sword and slaying the man in two. However, his cup was filled once more and a brush of the servant's fingers with his own made him look up. His eyes widened when he recognized you and he was about to speak when you smiled at him before standing up and all warmth left your face as you glared at Guy and finally spoke up.
"You call hurting a child on purpose to get to me a "necessary evil" ? Is that what they teach you at Court ? If so..I feel sorry for you."
Suddenly, all the eyes were on you and Guy frowned as it took him a few seconds to recognize you. But, once he did, his eyes widened and his hand hovered over his sword.
"Succubus.", he spat at you and you closed your eyes. That name again. That dreadful name a few of the white men from the North used to call you. Before you were even given a name, you knew what they called you..However, you only gave the man a placid smile before taking your assigned place. You took a handful of grapes and started eating while you could feel the stares.
But, you were used to them by now. Guy was still up with his hand on his sword and ready to strike you down, if only given the order. The king who had remained unmoving so far was now studying you with attention.
You weren't armed. You didn't seem to possess the necessary qualities to be called a demon and you were eating like a wildling, not caring if the other men at the table seemed disgusted or even scared.
"Stand down, Guy. She is our guest after all.", he finally ordered and Guy's eyes widened at the command as he tried to protest.
"But, my king.." Baldwin wordlessly raised his hand in the air and Guy immediately stopped talking. Baldwin then returned his attention on you.
"Tiberias told me you had healing capabilities beyond all of those who have ever attempted to help me. And there is a long list..Tell me, Almaealij Aleazim. Is it true ? Can you heal me ?" There was barely hidden hope behind his words and you smiled before nodding—confident as to the extent of your gift.
"It is true. I even believe I could help you find your way, king. But, I'll first have to ask you a question to determine if you are worthy of my time.." Baldwin tilted his head to the side quizzically, wondering about your condition, and even though you could feel everyone around the table tense, you didn't try to shy away. You waited patiently for his answer and Baldwin even found great amusement in this little exchange.
"Really ? Very well.", he leaned back on his chair. "Ask me your question then."
You nodded and even though you were surrounded by highly armed men and just one blow could send you early to your Maker, you asked unashamedly.
"Tell me..Do kings also have weaknesses ?"
Baldwin's eyes widened slightly at the unexpected question and before he could answer, Guy stood up and raised his voice once more at you.
"You dare accuse our beloved sovereign of being weak, you little impertinent ?!" You remained calm and Tiberias stood up beside you as he glared threateningly at Guy.
"Get back to your seat, Guy of Lusignan. Before I make you."
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It wasn't a request and Guy's eyes widened in stupor. Tiberias had never dared speak to him with such audacity and you knew by the way his legs quivered slightly that he wasn't left indifferent by it.
"Blasphemous.", Guy finally muttered under his breath before indulging—as the king hadn't yet asked him to cut off your head.
Guy glared at you, but you didn't spare him a moment of consideration as the corners of your mouth tilted upwards at Tiberias' defending. He was holding his side of the bargain and you knew it would make the operation all the more likely to be achieved smoothly. You tilted your head with a mischievous smirk as Tiberias' countenance shifted to a surprised one as you gently stroke his damaged cheek. The gentle gesture was enough for the whole Court to whisper to themselves and even though the gesture in itself was innocent enough, Tiberias grabbed your arm firmly. The face Tiberias gave you next was enough to make you look away in shame and retract your arm, as even if you weren't exactly scared of him, Tiberias could be very intimidating..
"Forgive her, my king. She is new to this Court.", Tiberias apologized on your behalf and you frowned a little, prepared to protest that you weren't sorry. However, the silence was cut short by the king's light chuckle.
"No worries, my old friend. I find her entertaining. Tell me, Almaealij. How would you help me find my way ?"
He had deviated your question to focus on the how. But you didn't mention it. He had been kind enough not to take offense where many men would have already flayed you. There was no malice behind the question, he was genuinely interested and you swallowed another mouthful of your food before answering.
"I would search deep into your soul and find what the kind one sees in you.."
The kind one ? Baldwin looked up at Tiberias who was now sweeping the crowd with his hawk eyes, searching for any reason to be worried or suspicious. A smile stretched on Baldwin's lips. He truly was the kind one..
"I see. Very well then. We shall soon see if my being is worthy of your treatment."
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King Baldwin then raised his hand to his forehead and said his goodbyes in true Jerusalem fashion before retiring from you.
As soon as he was inside, the other guests started retiring as well and Tiberias gestured for you to follow him. You grabbed an apple before indulging and the knight made you walk through numerous corridors before stopping in front of a big golden door. You wondered why he was stopping when he entered and wordlessly gestured for you to enter after him. You agreed and followed him and once you were out of ear's reach, he sighed.
"You mustn't touch me in such a frivolous way in the presence of anyone else in this Court, do I make myself clear ?"
You gulped at the dark stare he gave you and you sheepishly nodded.
"I didn't mean to upset you.", you said truthfully and Tiberias' expression softened. He sighed again and plopped down in a nearby chair before massaging his face with his gloved hand, letting out a loud groan of exhaustion.
"You didn't upset me. I am a soldier. Soldiers like me do not need distractions and rumors going around about them. I have enough trouble as it is.." You hung your head in shame and stared at your feet. Tiberias seemed extremely bothered and you wished to see him smile, but so far all your attempts had ended in failure.
"Take the bed. I'll sleep on the chair." You looked up at him in surprise, but he didn't return your gaze and only vaguely gestured with his free hand to the bed in the middle of the room.
"I'll ask for princess Sybil to send one of her servants to bring you some of her nightgowns tomorrow, or send you to another room if you wish..But, for now, I am too tired to bother and hope you won't hold it against me.." You opened your mouth to tell him he didn't need to justify himself to you, but closed your mouth rather quickly. Tiberias was still in his armor and in a chair that seemed for too little for a man of his stature. But, you believed him when he said he was ready to doze off either way.
However, you had other plans.
You tiptoed to stand behind him and let your hands slide on his shoulders to unfasten his shoulder blades. Tiberias let you, but you could feel his body tense underneath your hands. You shushed him soothingly before making your way back to his front and beginning undoing his chest plate. He still had his hand covering his face, but he peered at you through the gaps between his fingers. He silently watched as you seemed focused on the task at hand.
"...You don't need to..." Before he could finish his sentence, you had pulled him out of his chair and laid him down on the bed.
"In my country, it is rude to sleep soundly in someone else's bed while the host is uncomfortable in his own home.", you tried to explain and even though you were pretty sure Tiberias knew you were lying, he didn't extend on the subject and only sighed once more.
"I suppose it makes sense..Somehow." You didn't miss the way the corners of his lips twitched upwards and rolled your eyes playfully before laying down on the bed with a loud thud. It was a comfortable bed, one with soft silks and cushy pillows. It felt good. You were usually so busy with healing people, you never actually had the time to rest and enjoy the simple pleasures of life. You didn't mean to glance at Tiberias' torso either. You hadn't thought of it, but it was the first time you shared a bed with a man. And out of all men to be Tiberias, you felt honored and somehow intimidated. You thought back on the way he had ordered Guy to seat down and you started giggling, thinking on how the fool had had no choice but to obey and looked quite submissive before his imposing presence. Tiberias opened one eye to look up at you quizzically, but didn't say anything. Even though, he was quite curious as to the reason of your hilarity.
"Tiberias..I am sure a man such as yourself would make any woman happy in bed.", you mused. Tiberias' eyes widened slightly and a light blush spread across his cheeks at the implication. But, he quickly looked away and tried to hide his embarrassment by clearing his throat.
"What nonsense are you blabbering on about, woman ?!", he asked with his gruff voice—hiding his reddened face from you—and it only made you laugh harder.
The next morning :
His majesty's servants came early to wake you up and bring you to Baldwin. Tiberias had already left for his morning duties and when you were brought into the king's chambers, you marveled at the delicate and elaborate decorations of the room. It felt like entering a true palace with golden vines and oceanic patterns..You then noticed the king's unmoving form on the bed. He barely had the strength to breathe and you couldn't help but feel bad for the king, as he seemed in deep misery.
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"You must be in great pain..", you whispered sadly and tried to get the bandages off, but he suddenly grabbed your arm with his gloved hand—his eyes now staring at you.
"You know of my illness, Almaealij. Do not be so careless.", he admonished you softly.
Careless ? You would have taken offense if it wasn't for the way his king's voice trembled slightly out of worry. He must have spent years with no real physical contact and you bit your lower lip at the sad thought. No one should endure such pain.
"I am well aware of your situation, my king. I have healed lepers before. Fortunately, my gift allows me to touch your kind without fearing an infection..", you explained and even though Baldwin seemed uncertain, he finally let go of your arm.
"Fine. But, I must warn you that my appearance may be repulsive to you." You offered him a reassuring smile before giving his bandaged hand a light squeeze.
"Don't worry, my king. I can handle it."
He kept staring at you for a few seconds skeptically before letting out a sigh of defeat. You involuntarily gasped when he removed his mask and showed you the extend of the damage. His face was but a pretense of what it used to be and he mistook your silence for judgment. He turned his face away from you and asked—his voice a mere whisper as you knew moving his lips must be torture at this point.
"Hideous, isn't it ?"
However, you didn't say anything and only grabbed his face between your hands, his eyes closing at the touch. He had been without it for years and the feeling of actual skin against his made him shiver. He didn't know if what you said was true, that you couldn't be infected by this disease, but he chose to believe. He chose to let himself be examined under the care of your patient hands and remained still. You then lowered your face enough for the both of you to be on eye level with each other. You then started singing and Baldwin's breath hitched as he felt himself slowly drifting away. It was as if he was floating above his body and this was when he saw it..The monstrous mass of black sand swirling around him. The sickness.
You then opened your mouth and started inhaling the black matter, but it was so much that Baldwin knew you wouldn't be able to get rid of all of it in one sitting. He slowly lowered himself towards his body and when you started suffocating—he decided to stop the session himself. He went back in his body and stood upward, almost knocking your foreheads together in the process. He then saw blood dripping down your nose and his brow furrowed with worry.
"Are you...alright ?" You forced yourself to stand up and gave him a reassuring smile before explaining.
"My health might waver slightly with each intake. It depends on the illness and the time it has spent growing inside its victim. But, don't worry. I recover quickly."
Baldwin didn't know if he should believe you. He knew you to be quite honest but, there was a slight flicker in your gaze—a fear that brought doubt into his heart.
"You promised to heal me, but I do not wish you to do so by sacrificing yourself for me.", he reminded you and your smile faltered just a bit. No one had ever cared about your well-being during your sessions. Of course, you had people thanking you for your time, but none of them had ever worried about the process in itself and its effects on you.
"I sing and relieve you of your woes. But, the real cure comes from the heart. You need to believe you can be cured.", you insisted and Baldwin nodded. He did. But, he now also knew of the size of his curse and wouldn't let you exhaust yourself.
"And I do. But, I am no fool. I know my sickness is no small thing and has been festering inside me since I was 16. It would take you more energy and I will not allow you to die for my sake." Your eyes widened at his concern and you offered him a genuine smile. Tiberias had done nothing but praise his benevolent monarch since the beginning, but you now were certain of his good heart.
You were all the more determined to help him.
You nodded and were about to wipe the blood off your face with your sleeve, but Baldwin stopped you and reached for his one of his tissues instead to wipe it himself. He didn't care about the blood, not when you had seen his face and hadn't even flinched in disgust.
He felt better already—if only slightly. He could move his fingers with more ease and didn't feel as tired. The sickness was still there, but at least he had hope now.
"Our sessions won't be more than 30 minutes each day and you must tell me if you feel any kind of discomfort..", he instructed you and you nodded in agreement before gently taking his hand in yours and kissing the ring there. He was really a king.
"Yes, my king. Thank you for your consideration.". Baldwin hummed in acknowledgement before putting his mask back on.
"We will resume tomorrow. For now, you are welcome to discover the castle and I shall ask my sister to keep you company."
You curtsied and left the room with a small smile on your face. You were now certain of having taken the right decision.
When you first met Sybil—the king's sister—you were stunned by her beauty. She seemed sculpted in alabaster and even though, she was far from vain. She smiled and greeted you with kindness. You couldn't even believe her to be Guy's wife. The man was unworthy of such beauty..She immediately offered to share her bedroom with you and offered you all the dresses you as much as stare at a little too long out of interest. You quickly became friends and you soon grew accustomed to a life at the palace.
You almost forgot your original purpose, until your past came knocking at your window.
A crow. From Saladin. The enemy of Jerusalem and of all crusaders.
He was asking you to meet and you quickly replied with a letter of your own. Once night fell upon Jerusalem, you sneaked out of the palace and met with Saladin at the outskirts of the city. Saladin was already waiting for you a smile lit up his face as he saw you and you finally smiled back before embracing him.
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"I see you, brother."
"And I see you, dear sister.."
You greeted each other and Saladin quickly asked.
"So..Did you succeed in making your way into the palace ?"
You nodded and Saladin's smile widened before he praised you.
"Good. Good. And the king ? Is he on his deathbed ?" At the mention of Baldwin, your smile faltered slightly. Indeed, Saladin had given you as a mission to accelerate the king's downfall, as Saladin knew he was the only reason the city was still standing.
You wouldn't tell him you were considering stopping, or that you were actually helping the king rather than making his die faster.
You simply nodded and Saladin nodded—apparently satisfied by your confirmation.
"Good. The sooner it is done, the sooner you will get back to us. And Jerusalem will be ours."
You nodded once more, even with less enthusiasm than before and this time, Saladin noticed. He frowned slightly and sighed before taking your hand and making you sit beside him.
"I can see that something is upsetting you, dear sister. What is it ?" You bit your lower lip in hesitation before finally asking.
"What if...What if we were wrong, Saladin ? What if not all the crusaders are as bad as we thought ?" Saladin's eyes widened for a second in surprise at your sudden change of heart and sighed before actually pondering on it.
"What of it ?", he finally answered and you looked up at him with widened eyes as he addressed you a small sad smile. "War is war, sister. We will keep fighting until either side wins it all. It is written. And I firmly believe that it would be better for Jerusalem to be lead by its people, don't you think ?"
It was your time to ponder on his words. You had seen the worst and the best of the crusaders. You had been the witness of Jerusalem's thrive under king Baldwin IV's rule and a child be called a thief by the very crusader who wished to steal the king's throne..All crusaders weren't bad, but you still felt as if corruption and hypocrisy were things you couldn't abide by. Your people did have the same defaults, but they admitted it.
They didn't seek to hide it.
It was also the reason for your first question to king Baldwin. To test his honesty.
Could kings have weaknesses ?
You still waited for his answer. You finally nodded and Saladin hugged you once more.
"Remember, sister. The only way to get Jerusalem, is for you to lie to the people and yourself...dear sister." You closed your eyes and held him tighter.
"I understand.."
But, you wouldn't kill Baldwin because of it. So, you bid your brother farewell before returning inside, knowing it would probably the last time you would meet..
Almost a month later :
Tiberias felt better, better than he had felt in a long time. Baldwin had started joining you more often at dinners and the guests started enjoying his company once more. Some even laughed in his presence and the mask didn't hide the fact that the king was happier.
Tiberias liked the way his eyes creased as his smile was showing more often now. However, he then noticed something else. He noticed how your hand was constantly on top of his majesty's. He tried not to let it go to his head, as you were friendly with pretty much everyone. He had even seen you having a civile conversation with Ronand. And nobody liked Ronand.
It brought him to the thought of his majesty's healing. He felt and looked far better. Everyone was aware of it. He also knew a certain Saladin was looking for you, as many spies in the city were on the look out for the Almaealij Aleazim. Tiberias knew it was only a matter of time before people started connecting the dots and would talk.
So, it came to his last concern: your fate after the complete recovery of his majesty.
It was the reason his feet led him to the king's private quarters at night. The king had decided to move you to his sister's private chambers, so he didn't need to worry about waking you up any longer.
When he knocked, he waited a few seconds before Baldwin's voice was heard. He told him to come in and Tiberias indulged. When he stepped in, he was surprised to find the king at his desk, studying and with your head resting on his shoulder—snoring softly.
Tiberias stopped dead in his tracks at the sight and then eyed the door. It was not too late to back down.
"I see that you are busy..I shall come back later.", he promptly said, but Baldwin shook his head. "Do not worry, old friend. She's been asleep for the past hour. I asked her to teach me a bit more about her people and their customs. Fascinating, I must say."
Tiberias nodded shortly and was about to say that it could wait, but his eyes settled on you and he knew it couldn't wait. He had grown attached to you and had to know what the king had in store for you..
"If it works..Will you release her ?", Tiberias asked and Baldwin suddenly stopped his feather in mid-air at the question.
"She is not my prisoner, Tiberias.", Baldwin reminded him, but it didn't answer his question.
"With all the respect that you are due, I think his majesty knows what I mean.", he insisted and Baldwin sighed. He imagined it was only normal for his old mentor to be worried, as he was the person who had brought you to him.
"...Tell me, Tiberias. What would you say if I told you I would like the girl to stay with me ? That I'd like nothing more than for her to remain here and even, if she'd allow it, share a life with me ?" Tiberias hid his surprise the best he could and remained still for a moment, the both of them staring at each other in perfect silence. Tiberias thought about it. It was normal. His majesty was still young and now that he had the possibility to live a long and successful life, he would get attached to the girl who he owed everything to..Besides, the king would be able to protect you more than anyone else—even him.
He plastered a smile on his face and nodded shortly, his hands closed into fists by his sides.
"I would say that his majesty better tell her before somebody else does."
Baldwin blinked twice before realization hit him and his expression shifted into one of pity at the old soldier. He then uttered his name with an uncanny softness, full of pity and almost apologetic.
"...Tiberias."
Tiberias didn't wait. He moved to the door and opened it wide before stepping outside in a hurry. He regretted saying anything. He should have kept his mouth shut.
He needed fresh air.
In the opposite side's camp :
Ronand had been told that Saladin was looking for you and even though it was dangerous, he decided to warn Saladin of your whereabouts before you could definitely and irreversibly heal the king. His master Guy had married the king's sister and spent the last seven years plotting his demise, not for that she-demon to bring him back to life.
He arrived in the middle of the night and Saladin was waiting for him alone—as agreed in the letters they had shared. He set his foot down from his horse and tried to shake the leader's hand, only to be met with a cold stare.
"Where is she ?", Saladin asked straight away and Ronand immediately understood that he needed to be brief.
"His majesty has her. The witch is apparently taking care of him with her strange demonic powers.." Saladin slightly frowned at the very unflattering description Ronand was making of you. But, he still continued.
"And, is it working ?" Ronand nodded vividly as he recalled all the tiny changes in his majesty's behavior and turned his head back to the city.
"Yeah. She is making a mess of my plans and this is why I need you to get in there and kill the b..."
Saladin cut off his head.
He didn't like rats.
A week later :
You were almost done. You had spent days working on his majesty and each day he seemed to be getting better. You were glad and it filled you with joy to know you would have helped one of the few righteous kings in this world..until the news that was.
"A message from my master Saladin. Give me the Almaealij Aleazim, or I'll set Jerusalem on fire and blood shall spill.", the messenger read out loud and you shivered. You knew that handwriting and those words..They could only mean one thing. Saladin. He knew where you were.
Baldwin frowned a little in confusion before turning towards you and when he noticed how scared you looked, he immediately understood. He then asked all the people present to step outside, as he was to talk to his healer. Alone.
They all indulged, but Tiberias did give you a worried glance. You gave him a reassuring smile, but as soon as he was out, your smile fell and you turned around to face the king.
"Tiberias warned me of men who had once held you captive for your powers..Was Saladin one of those men ?", he asked with concern in his voice and slightly tilted your chin so you may face him fully. His piercing blue eyes seeking out answers in yours. Your lips trembled as you remembered what Saladin had told you last time you had seen each other..
"The only way to get Jerusalem, is for you to lie to the people and yourself...dear sister."
You were on the verge of tears and—left with no alternative—nodded slightly. Your loyalty was still to your own blood and you were scared of what Baldwin would do if he knew of your own blood. He hummed understandingly before getting down at his desk and starting a letter. You didn't understand what he was about to do until it was too late. He attached the letter to the leg of one of his birds and let it fly away into the darkness.
"Baldwin..What did you do ?", you finally asked and Baldwin shrugged—as if it was of no importance as he replied. "I sent a message to Saladin telling him to meet me in two days to decide of your fate. I shall not sit here and let him take you away without a fight. I assure you."
You hadn't expected it. You knew well of his kind heart by now, but you didn't expect such a reaction. You had sought to buy yourself some time, but you had only doomed the whole kingdom by doing so.
"Your majesty. I lied.", you confessed.
Baldwin's eyes widened significantly upon your confession and he waited for you to continue, elaborate on the matter. You felt great shame take over you, as only words of apology came tumbling out of your mouth. You felt tears threaten to spill as you begged him on your knees.
"Please. Do not hurt Saladin. Do not hurt my brother." His breath came out deep and uneven as he finally realized. The real reason for your presence in this city..Your miraculous apparition when he needed you the most..Saladin had told him he would send him his healers, he didn't think you would be one of them. He had shown you everything. He had told you everything. You knew all of his secrets and his blood boiled at the notion that he had been fooled.
"Baldwin...I...", you started and tried to grab his hand, but he slapped your hand away and cut you off harshly.
"SILENCE !"
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Baldwin grabbed your arm to pull you up and stare at you. His eyes glaring daggers at you through the two narrow holes in his mask. You had never seen him so angry as he glared at you, his blue eyes trapping you in a snow storm.
"You asked me if kings had any weaknesses ? Well, now I can answer you with certainty. I am selfish. I am very quick to anger. And most of all, I do not have any tolerance for liars. And my only weakness ? The only thing keeping me away from sending you back to Saladin ? This godforsaken sickness..This putrid and decading flesh..You said you could get rid of it. And I believed you..And even though, I always had this gnawing feeling that you were not being truthful with me. Now, I know why." His hold tightened to an iron grip as he seethed. "You. A spy. Amongst my ranks."
"I swear I had no intention to..", you tried to justify yourself, but Baldwin shook his head. His hold on you tightened and even though you had sucked out most of his illness, you feared he might collapse any moment.
"WHY ?! WHY LIE TO ME ?! WHY HURT ME SO ?!", he cried out and you felt your heart break at the clear hurt in his eyes. You bit your lower lip and tried to get away from his grip, but he wouldn't let you. He was too angry by your betrayal and desperately wanted to know why.
"WHY, ALMAEALIJ ?!", he repeated and you finally broke into tears. You grabbed his mask and threw it away in your attempt for him to let go—which he did. He quickly put his mask back on and glared at you with more fury than ever. But, his harsh glare quickly changed as you showed him the same scars you had shown Tiberias on your first encounter.
"BECAUSE THE MEN WHO TOOK ME WERE CRUSADERS ! THEY WERE WHITE DEVILS AND I WANTED YOU TO PAY ! YOU ARE THEIR KING ! THEIR LEADER ! I WAS SUPPOSED TO KILL YOU, NOT HEAL YOU !"
Baldwin stilled and for a second, you thought he was going to strike you down, but he didn't. He only collapsed on his chair and covered his masked face with his hand, hiding his tears from you.
"...Get out. Now.", he commanded—his voice a mere whisper now.
You didn't need to be told twice. You opened the door, but found Tiberias standing there, his expression still shocked by what he had heard. You both stood there for a while until Tiberias' expression darkened and all softness left his face as he grabbed your arm and dragged you away. You tried to talk to him, but he refused to listen as he unceremoniously threw you in a cell.
"I...trusted you."
His words were sorrowful and you knew you had broken him with the way he seemed more disappointed than angry. You tried to reach for him through the bars to soothe him, but he recoiled from your touch with a sour expression.
"You will leave. Tomorrow."
It was not to be discussed. And with that, he was gone.
The next day :
You waited all morning for someone to come and bring you back to Saladin—even if it was in pieces. But, it seemed they had either forgotten about you, or had other much more important matters to attend to..which you soon discovered was the second one. People were running up and down with wet towels and ailments of all kinds and it was well past midday when someone finally came to get you. Tiberias had the same sorrowful look on his face, but it was now accentuated with dark circles under his eyes.
He hadn't slept all night.
"Tiberias..What's going on ? Tell me. Please.", you urged him. Tiberias seemed to wonder on whether or not he should answer you, but finally sighed in defeat.
"Ronand was found dead at the gates this morning." If the news didn't make you worry, the other one definitely did as he quickly added. "And his majesty is dying. His healers have diagnosed him this morning and said he was even worse than before your arrival. Guy is saying it would be better to execute you."
You knew that any traitor deserved punishment, but Baldwin didn't deserve it. You had spent almost a year taking care of him and even though you had done your best to fight the disease, you gift also relied on hope. And by breaking the king's heart, you may have as well plunged a dagger into his heart. You couldn't make yourself the reason for his downfall.
"Tiberias. I can heal him. I swear.", you tried to reach for him, convince him of your sincerity—but he shook his head in disbelief.
"You dare ask me to believe in your magic ? After you betrayed us ?", Tiberias asked—dumbfounded by your sheer nerve—and the reminescence of last night's events hurt far worse coming from your closest friend's mouth.
"No. I'm asking you to believe in me.", you said with confidence in your voice and Tiberias' face softened. He had been by your side since the beginning of this journey, you hoped he would be with you until the end.
You grabbed his arm as he was about to get out and pleaded.
"I won't give up on you, Tiberias. Do not dare give up on me."
Tiberias closed his eyes and took a big breath. He didn't want to betray his king and let a prisoner approach him on his deathbed, during his final hours. Baldwin didn't deserve it.
But, it there was even one tiny bit of hope that his grace would survive, he was willing to sell his soul to the devil. He opened your cell and lead you back upstairs to the king's bedroom. The healers were all there as well as some of the crusaders, but they immediately left when Tiberias ordered them to. He was the closest advisor to the king after all and until the king was dead, his authority wasn't about to be questioned.
Some of the crusaders still warned Guy who rushed to the king's private quarters. However, they were spooked by the way your mouth opened unnaturally wide to swallow the dark sand of leprosy out of the king. You had suspected it to have grown since last night and it didn't disappoint. You had to get rid of it today, or his majesty wouldn't survive.
"WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS ?! ARREST HER !", Guy shouted and some of the soldiers tried to drag you away, but you fought against them with all your might. Tiberias hesitated to act. He had been charged with the mission of removing you from the premises and handed safely to your brother in case things went wrong by the king himself. You would be exchanged for the kingdom of Jerusalem and Guy would become king..An awful prospect. But, you weren't ready to give up.
"NO ! Please, Tiberias..Help me. I can save him. Please. Believe me.", you cried out and in an instant, Tiberias was standing by your side with his sword keeping the other crusaders from touching you.
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"May God be my witness. You won't touch her. Anyone who would dare lay his hand upon her before his king's final breath will have said hand cut off.."
You smiled gratefully at Tiberias and leaned forward to retrieve Baldwin's mask. You knew Tiberias was still giving you an ultimatum, but you were still determined to make the most out of the time you had left. You didn't look away as you saw the state of his face and gently ran your hand along his damaged face. You then leant forward to hover your lips over his. You then opened your mouth wide and in one last attempt, sucked all the pain and sorrow out of him. Your heart started squeezing and your eyes watered as you felt all that pain fill your lungs. But, you kept inhaling, wishing and praying it wasn't too late. Your throat felt on fire and you knew your eyes to have turned a dark shade of black.
'Come on, Baldwin. Wake up.', you begged him in your head and didn't realize as your lips connected with his in order to get as much of his illness as you could, desperate to get rid of the very last speck of dark dust billowing in his system. Baldwin had always insisted on keeping you at arm's length, afraid he might hurt you if you were to keep going. But, now that he was on his deathbed, he could prevent you no longer.
You had been worried of him not being worthy of being saved, but now you were afraid of losing him. You had reached all the wrong conclusions and all his attempts of pushing you away weren't threats, but simply ways to save you.
You kept going, kept inhaling all his woes and darkness until you felt tears at the corner of your eyes—but you refused to give up. One and the same mantra keeping you awake.
Wake up Baldwin.
Wake up Baldwin.
WAKE UP BALDWIN !
And then, you blacked out. You barely had the time to hear Tiberias call for your name as your body hit the cold hard floor.
One last prayer for Baldwin as your unconscious took over.
Wake up..Baldwin.
A few hours later :
"Almaealij.."
You opened your eyes at the soft calling of your name. You groaned and turned, but you then felt a gentle shake that finally made you wake up. You slowly opened your eyes, blinked a few times before recognizing the face of Baldwin above you. You could see his eyes lit up with life and a few tears of joy escaped you as you gently ran your fingers alongside his face.
"I...succeeded ?", you asked in disbelief at your own success. He smiled and nodded before gently stroking your cheek. He didn't feel weak anymore and even though his face was still disfigured, he knew the illness to be gone—as did you.
You then looked outside and noticed the sun to be high up and sighed. It was the second day since Baldwin had sent the letter.
Your brother would come to get you.
"I guess I must go now.", you guessed and Baldwin opened his mouth to answer—but the door suddenly slammed open and here was Tiberias. You knew he had been worried sick by the way his hair stuck to his temple with cold sweat. His eyes immediately met yours and he let out a deep sigh of relief.
"So, it is true. You are awake. I.." He then noticed the amused look Baldwin was giving him and quickly got back his composure. He stood straight and tried not to make eye contact as he informed you.
"Saladin is at the door, your majesty."
At the news, your hold on Baldwin tightened just a little as you remembered the way he had entered into a dark rage at the mention of your brother. But, Baldwin smiled reassuringly at you befit turning towards Tiberias with a small nod.
"Fine. Let's go greet him then. Prepare the horses."
Your eyes widened as he seemed so calm now and you would have given everything to know what was going on in his head at that moment. He left before you could ask and you wordlessly dressed up. You just hopped you hadn't accidently started another war..
A few hours later :
You stood before your brother and Baldwin by your side. Saladin quickly assessed you up and down for any injury, but was relieved to find none. It seemed the king of the white devils had had treated you well, but he was more curious as to the reason of their meeting. In the letter, Baldwin had seemed in a hurry and even though, he was before him with all the composure and magnanimity of a true king, bowing his head and greeting him.
"I see you, Saladin." He raised his hand from his forehead to him and Saladin greeted him back.
"And I see you, king Baldwin."
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They both offered such a powerful and dominant presence, you could almost feel their strength of mind from where you stood. It was unlike anything you had ever witnessed. Two kings. Two kingdoms. Two different people. And yet, the same aura.
"Tell me. Why this meeting ?", your brother finally asked and Baldwin smiled underneath his mask.
"I wish to discuss a way to reach peace between our two realms."
Saladin tilted his head, intrigued by this sudden request—but let his curiosity get the best of him as he answered.
"Very well..How ?"
How indeed ? You hadn't seen Baldwin so sure of himself and even though you had no idea of what he was going to suggest, you just hoped it wouldn't be anything violent. You couldn't lose him or your brother.
You then realized, you had grown attached to the king and even though you knew he was a part of the people that had enslaved you, you felt safe with him..He was different. He was willing to forgive and forget, which you hoped he would be willing to do with your brother.
"As you know, your sister saved me. I wish for her to remain by my side.", Baldwin declared and even though Saladin didn't know the point he was trying to make, he still agreed.
"And I want her to come back home with me."
So far...You didn't know what was Baldwin's plan, but you hoped it wouldn't end with another reason for both kingdoms to rage war against each other. Baldwin nodded.
"And I think her home is with us."
There was an unspoken agreement between both leaders as Saladin finally smiled and even let out a small knowing chuckle.
"I only intend for my sister to be happy. If she says her home is with you, I shall retreat this instant." You looked at both men consecutively before standing forward and taking Baldwin's hand.
"I am, brother. And I wish to make Jerusalem our home to all."
Saladin smiled tenderly at you before nodding in agreement—certain of the veracity of your words. He then looked back at Baldwin.
"My sister healed you. She took care of you. I must ask you to assure me she will be taken care of."
Baldwin nodded in agreement before replying.
"Of course. I understand your concern. However, you mustn't worry. As I intend to make your sister my wife."
A long silence followed as both you and Saladin were too stunned for words.
"You...what ?", you asked and Baldwin nodded before ignoring your dumbfounded expression as he added.
"Indeed, she stole my first kiss. It is only normal we marry, as per your customs if I recall correctly ?", he pretended to remember on the spot, even though you knew he had studied all the books concerning your culture he could find in the royal library..
~Oh. That clever little...Of course he would remember your customs now. Of all times. You looked away from your brother in shame and Saladin's eyes widened as he realized he was telling the truth. Suddenly, Saladin burst out laughing and the sound made you fall back to your childhood when he would laugh at your every misstep.
You glared at him and before you could stop yourself, you started speaking in your native language.
"Tawaqaf ean aldahik ealaa alkalb almajnun !" (Stop laughing, you mad dog !)
When Saladin finally stopped laughing, he got off his horse and Baldwin did the same. They then stared at each other before your brother reached for the king's hand and shook it with his other on top of their joined hands in a sign of his blessing.
"I shall attend with pleasure. And our two people might be united at last."
You tried not to faint on your horse. What ? When ? Where ? How ? Baldwin didn't even wait for you when he settled back on his horse and galloped away. Your brother gave you one last cheeky grin before going his way and you were left with your mouth wide open.
...Had you just been the witness of your own arranged marriage ?
Tiberias smiled as soon as he heard the news and tried to calm you down as you started telling him the events of the day. Again. You had started as a traitor in a dark cell to end as the betrothed of king Baldwin. However, even though you were nervous, you seemed happy. Tiberias had always wanted the king to be linked in matrimony with someone good and kind. You were all that and more..But, he was also an old man who knew all about the symptoms of love. And seeing you with that twinkle in your eyes and that smile you were so desperate to hide..He was happy for you. Or, he tried to be.
Out of all women, he never thought he would fall for the single one he could never have..
But, he was an old man. And you deserved the world. You had held your end of the bargain. You had saved his king and he would keep protecting you until the end, no matter how much his heart ached.
"I wish you all the best, Almaealij Aleazim.."
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rogerswifesblog · 2 years ago
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For andy jacob, can you write where lauri is in jail for intentional cr crash and the death of jacob. andy remarried to florist reader who he fell in love with after the death of his son. Florist! reader is pregnant with his first child.
Thank you for the request! I really hope you like it! Let me know!
Second chances for love
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𝐒𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: After what happened to Andy, he never thought he'd be happy again. And then he met you...
𝐏𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: Husband!Andy Barber x Wife!florist!Reader
𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: mostly just fluff, mentioned dead son (Jacob), using 'daddy' but not in a sexual way
Keep in mind English is not my first language!
Don’t forget to like, comment and reblog!<3
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Andy never expected to fall in love again. Not after all that happened to him-his son dying, his wife going into jail, the problems he had at work after all of this stress-he hadn't expected to meet such a sweet woman like you in all of this.
You two met in your flower shop.
Andy wanted to buy some flowers for his son's grave, so he decided to visit the new shop, which he heard really great stuff about. Apparently the flowers were all fresh and beautiful, also the owner was supposed to be very friendly.
And god were you friendly and cute.
As soon as he entered the shop you came with a big smile on your face. His heart jumped up to his throat. He felt butterflies in his whole body-and he didn't even know people could feel like that.
After that he bought flowers every day in your shop-sometimes even when he didn't planned on going to the cemetery. He just...wanted to see you. You made him happy, just talking to he. Sometimes you two flirted a bit, but Andy was still scared to really give you a chance-yet you waited till he was ready.
It took him a couple of weeks till he finally asked you out.
After that, it happened quickly. He was already in love when you two went on the date together. All this time he always had spend talking with you about your flowers, made him slowly fall for you. The way your eyes lit up, every time he asked about one of your favourite flowers.
After a few months into your relationship he asked you to marry him.
He never expected to marry a second time, but with you? You made him happy.
You helped him with his past, with his grieve. It broke your heart to see him so sad and broken, but you knew he needed time for his grieve. So you were there for him when he needed a shoulder to cry. You knew he'd always love his son. It wasn't easy to loose a child. A parent should never bury their kid, but Andy had to do it. He watched his only child die. It broke him and without you he had no idea where he would be right now.
A few months into your marriage Andy went with a few of his friends out. He came home back drunk and laid down with you. Gently he put his hand on your stomach, his head right next to it and looked up after a while at you. "I...we should make a baby", he mumbled, but fell asleep shortly after.
You two had never talked about children-you wanted them-but you had never expected for Andy to want having kids again.
The next morning you weren't sure if Andy remembered what he say-but he definitely did. After a few days he took you out on a date, asking once again if you wanted to have kids. Of course you said yes.
Before meeting Andy you thought you'd never have this. All of this; a husband, kids, a family...happiness...
You never met anyone who made you really happy. The only relationship you had been in weren't serious, were toxic or just exhausting. But with Andy?
He was your soulmate. You knew it as soon as he entered your shop and smiled at you. The sadness in his eyes made you want to hug him. Just hold him. But at the same time your heartbeat started racing like crazy.
"Andy, baby, stop it, I have to go to work-someone has to open the shop", you laughed, while Andy sat on the bed behind you and just held your round tummy. He was slightly frustrated, because you told him the baby started moving and kicking, but he always missed it. It was already a week ago when you felt the first kick-and he still hasn't seen or feel it. "Come on...just a second. She'll kick again. I know it", he mumbled in your neck.
You put your hands on his and gently squeezed them. "Andy, I know you want to feel it, but I really have to put some clothes on-and go to work", he let slowly let go of you and helped you get up.
It's not like you couldn't do it alone, but Andy really like helping you-literally with everything. He started helping you putting your socks on-which was cute, but sometimes annoying. Yet you understood why he did it.
He was scared. He had lost one child already, he didn't want for it to happen again.
So of course Andy prepared breakfast, while you went to the bathroom. While doing your make up you could feel some movement in your stomach. You sighed and looked down. „That's not very nice of you, princess. Why can't you move when daddy holds you, hm? You'd make him really happy with that", you mumbled, while holding your tummy. Once again you felt a kick against your hand.
"Well, at least you're showing how stubborn you are. Just like daddy", you shook your head slightly while rolling your eyes. She's definitely gonna be a daddy's girl.
And daddy'll be very happy about it.
This thought made you smile. It took a few months before you finally got pregnant-every negative pregnancy test made the two of you incredibly frustrated-but then, the positive one? God, you felt so, so happy...
And Andy? You've never seen him cry this much, especially not happy tears.
You walked back into the kitchen, where Andy sat at the table with his coffee-that was something you missed a lot. Coffee. Andy didn't want you to drink caffeine. Once again, you understood why, but it didn't mean you couldn't miss it.
"She kicked again", the slightly annoyed face Andy made was hilarious. Quietly you chuckled, while taking a bite of your avocado toast with eggs.
You loved Andys breakfasts. He always made something good-even toast was better when he did it. "It's so unfair. I want to feel the kicks-" "I could kick you", you grinned smugly, which made Andy grin too.
He leaned over the table to give you a kiss on your nose. "I appreciate that, but no", Andy laughed.
After a while you were done with breakfast and started putting your shoes on.
Then you felt it.
Such a hard kick, you gasped.
Andy rushed to you. "What's wrong? Are you okay? Is she okay?", he asked immediately. You could see the fear in his eyes as soon as came closer to you.
Slowly you shook your head, while pulling your shirt up. Uncontrollably you started laughing. "Oh god, Andy look!", of course Andy looked down at your tummy. A grin spread over his lips, while he fell on his knees. Slowly he shook his head.
"Oh princess-look at that. Hello, sweetheart", he started talking to you round belly, while looking at the very visible handprints from inside your belly. A little hand pushing against your skin. Andy chuckled, while giving your tummy-and his little girls hand-a kiss.
He put his forehead against your belly. A wet laugh escaped his throat when he felt your daughter move again. It made your heart clench. You couldn’t leave now. You just…no, not when Andy was in such a state. He seemed so happy. It wouldn’t be fair to go to work now.
“Andy, baby, go to the living room, I’ll be there in a minute-I’ll just call Spencer to open the shop for me”, you mumbled, while stroking Andys hair. Slowly he looked up at you. “You sure? I don’t want you to-“ “Andy, just go sit”, he nodded.
Andy give you quick, yet passionate kiss on the lips and went to the living room.
You called your employee to tell him you wouldn’t be at work today-he was very understanding, so you went to the living room and sat down next to Andy.
He immediately put his hands gently on your tummy and stroked the roundness. “You’ll kick for daddy again? Or are you gonna be stubborn?”, you mumbled while gently putting your hand your stomach.
After a few seconds you felt a kick again and Andy laughed happily. “She kicked! I felt it!”, you couldn’t stop grinning about his enthusiastic reaction.
You put your free hand against his cheek and stroked with your thumb over his cheek. A small smile showed on your face. You felt your heartbeat quicken. A warm spread in your whole body.
“I love you, Andy”, you mumbled softly.
Andy put one of his hands on yours, which you had on his cheek. He leaned over to you and gave you a tender kiss on the lips. Just like the first time he had Kissen you, you felt butterflies in your whole body.
“I love you, too. Both of you…you have no idea how happy you make me. I never…I never thought I would feel like that again. Thank you”, he whispered against your lips, before giving your belly a kiss too. A tear rolled down your cheek. You’ve never expected to be this happy either. Quickly you wiped away your tear, while you could feel some of Andys tears roll down to your belly.
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That’s it! I really hope you liked it!
Feedback?<3
Don’t forget to like, comment and reblog!
[I’ll write every request you send me, it’ll just take a while:) at least I’ll try to write all of them!]
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non-neutoniangender · 8 months ago
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Welp its a halloween episode, and right on time too, we had an emotional moment to get through. Anyway, I'm not familiar enough with the x men to know what these costumes are, besides cool.
Holy fucking shit FCG you're trying to FORCE Laudna back???
I'm so glad the dice decided to say no, thats so poetic lmao
Laura freaking Bailey ladies and gentlemen, and you tell me she didn't realize she had feelings for Laudna? Leaving her the choice, saying she would be there.... such fantastic roleplaying
okay So here I took a several month long break from watching CR for various reasons and I come back to remember that. I stopped watching IN THE MIDDLE OF THE RESURECTION. and I had forgotten it was halloween
oh noooooo not a 7 :(
(I cannot take matt seriously in these contacts)
(or taliesin as a vampire(?) for that matter)
I love that Marisha dressed up for this episode
Oh my god poor Laudna she's so traumatized
Whitestone!!! its thriving
The pinky promise 😭😭😭😟😟😟
I really adore the cast letting Laudna have a moment with the sun tree. What a lovely connection
Not ashley trying to steal the holy symbol from her own character
The implication that fcg sneezes is gold. thank you marisha lmao
Find Familiar!!!!
oh my god he has a voice!!!!
I love the voice that Matt has given Paté, amazing moment for everyone!
Oh I love that Percy gives the monkey a gun, such a percy move glad the monkey now has a gun to use.
Wow Sam. Just wow. These drink things are getting much more elaborate. Honestly the wack picures of the cast were better imo
The DREAMS!?!?! Not Eshteross, thats an awful thought...
I love Frearne chatting to the Sun Tree like a good friend. Rite of passage for the druids.
Love how proud of Taliesin is of Percy's stuff.
GILMORE!!!!!!!! ya love to see it.
Damn the dreaming that someone died is going to become important in this campaign huh.
Also the wills are super cool
I can't wait to find out what the Hells do with the letters not addressed to them.
Anyway, I'm very happy to have finally finished an episode for the first time in months, and hopefully this is the start of some good momentum? I'm really curious about the solstice and such, so.
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laurasbailey · 1 year ago
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thank the gods every time something """controversial""" happens, i know the girls are going to act their brains out. year after year campaign after campaign.
like i know ashley and laura are bafta winners, but just watching them go and fully embody the characters is so amazing to see. and my favorite girl marisha may not have the mainstream acting accolades or the long imdb, but she goes toe to toe with them, giving her 100% always. all those conversations and phrases, the physicality, the set ups, the themes, the repeated words in other contexts to punch you in the gut...
those women are just so amazing and so inspiring to me
it's honestly baffling how good marisha is at rp. not because i didn't believe she'd be good, but she just never misses??? we always get so much insight into her characters simply by the way she reacts to moments, and she may not even be central to the scene or plot at the time. idk i've been watching cr for almost five years now and i still feel spoiled that we get so much content and so many minutes just to bask in how good these guys are
like laura and marisha have always had chemistry so wanting a romance between their characters was obvious, but for me it was also because they're (imo) the two best rpers at the table and you just know you're going to get magic from them when you bring an emotionally-charged story into the mix. so not only do we get a romance in this campaign but we get a main plot that truly revolves around the three women, like they're just ticking things off my wishlist at this point.
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allamericanb-tch · 7 months ago
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crimson rivers thoughts (12)
@tastetherainbow290
chapter 26
rip james potter’s leg he’s gone full peeta
sirius is visiting reg
reg ☹️
talking about throwing up is arguably the worst part of this fic so far
“It's fine. I didn't even like this shirt. (Sirius really liked this shirt.)”
i am legitimately shaking but i don’t know if this is important so i need to read it
please stop talking about throwing up
poor regulus i feel so bad
and hes throwing up again
i cant even think about this what if i just skim the rest
ok pov switch thank god
oh no i forgot remus has to go back… 
sirius is so considerate
nooo remu
sirius pov again im praying there isn’t any more throwing up
and there it is.
poor regulus ahhhhh i just feel so bad for him like. i want to give him a hug.
why doesn’t regulus want to see james ☹️
sirius is visiting james now
that was sweet. sad, but sweet.
remus pov again
remu ❤️‍🩹
can someone tell me why the rat is my 5th most used emoji
"You're so precious to me, did you know that?"
remus loves sirius (duh)
chapter 27
i’m sad for wolfstar what’s gonna happen
"You can trust that the only person I have an interest in seeing naked is your brother." 😭
this hallow drama is actually hilarious
reggie 💔
i’m scared that pandora is going to die in the future bc we have t seen any of her pov
this is so sad.
no thoughts just sadness.
“i’m collecting them all” i’m glad to see you making jokes reg
"Oh, this is just the bruise finally blooming from where I tripped and fell the moment I saw you,"
this was a lighter chapter but still sad
chapter 28
back to james pov
oh no a nightmare
CRAP I FORGOT ABT MY MATH HOMEWORK it was due yesterday but she hasn’t graded it yet so if i turn it in now she won’t take of points for it being late
math homework is finished! back to reading (suffering)
oh yeah. nightmare. ☹️
"I wasn't supposed to go through this," no james, you were not. i’m sad now (i have been sad)
james leave regulus aloneeee (don’t leave him alone)
shrodinger’s cat mention
“james”
i’m actually crying right now.
nooo why are the fighting
james is getting his glasses back soon!!! huzzah
"I don't want to be a great, big tragedy anymore,"
baby
“it’s a parting gift” i’m crying again
regulus and remus friendship <3
“we broke up” “you were together?” 😭
ugh this is so sad. already i’ve cried more times than reading atyd AND choices and ive barely made a dent in cr
oh no interview prep
evan mention 💔
every time i see the word hallow in this fic im like “i need to add this (hallow/hollow) to my list of homophones” and i never do bc im writing all my thoughts in my notes app and my homophones list is in a different folder than my marauders thoughts 
chapter 29
oh me oh my hanky panky happening in this chapter i wonder for who
every time i call sex hanky panky i give myself the ick
"We broke up? This is news to me” james 😭
“No one needs romantic love to be fulfilled as a person. Not everyone wants it, and then there are those who aren't ready, and all of it is okay. That doesn't mean there's an absence of love, or that you're getting it wrong. You're not, Regulus, I promise." 
they’re holding hands (but for sad reasons)
interview time i’m scared
evan ☹️☹️☹️
vanity ☹️☹️☹️
“We love your love, don't we?" 💔
this is so sad omg i genuinely don’t know how im going to survive this
GLASSES!!!!!!
so he’s just been wearing contacts this whole time?
ok i need to go do my duolingo. 
i am back from duolingo.
james telling sirius to go have sex with remus on their last night 😭 i mean fair. they should
"I'm absolutely thinking about your brother right now." oh, james
james telling sirius about him and reg 😭 poor sirius
sirius asking james for tips 💀
“i expect all the details” james fleamont potter 😭
sirius is such a good brother. i love him. 
remus pov !!
“i would not have known joy if i did not have the pleasure of knowing you”
ugh wolfstar. i love you. 
😯 hanky panky
spine has been realigned
ok but any time any of them ever talk about getting off it just makes me think about one time when i was at a district choir concert and when we were practicing one of our songs the director said “there won’t be a dry seat in the audience” (he meant dry eye, bc the song was beautiful, but it just came out like everyone in the audience would dream their pants 😭) but. unnecessary story and it isn’t really that funny unless you were there but. 
chapter 30 (?!)
evan 💔
god.
remus ‘reading’ sirius’ mind 😭
they have to say goodbye ☹️
barty mention!!!!
*singing* i just miss you and i just wish you were a better man
“i love you” eeeeeeeee
omg kissing
and it’s over.
“i don’t want to hurt you anymore” 💔
eeeee they’re kissing again
“it’ll take a while but later—much later—james will look back on this and wonder, sadly, if it was a parting gift, too.” WHAT
sirius kissing the mask so remus will always have a sirius kiss
i love pandora
wolfstar goodbye 💔
the fact that all of this happened in the span of two weeks
effie and monty!!!!!!!!!!
the next chapter is lily… should i read it or go to sleep 
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mikeyswayy · 15 hours ago
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hey, uh. hi. yeah. sorry i dont know why im doing this. im pretty sure youre dead. god i hope you arent. maybe this is just the digital form of visiting someones grave eh? yeah, i dunno. its lonely without you. keep wanting to tag you in things, god i fucking wish i could still tag you in things. i was a little scared to send this one, even just to write it, but id rather you be alive and proving me a fool for writing this than dead. maybe with my luck the universe’ll wanna make me look stupid so bad that ur actually fine. i miss you. ive been waiting the past few days you know that? waiting to be wrong waiting for you to come back waiting for this to be like the other times, but its been four days now. i just. i hope you found peace man, i hope if you are dead its better than anything ever was back here, you deserve it.
while im here i figure i may as well catch you up on everything goin on, not anywhere near as good as getting to freak out about it on here with you but i think its the best im gonna get. so basically a couple days ago frank posted five random dates in the shape of the mcr logo and that was. jesus frank. the dates are 11/13, 2/16, 3/7, 2/24, and 12/6. i now live in fear. and then today the official mcr account posted a picture with a background that looks reminiscent of paper kingdom, oh god, 150 peices of,, ash? confetti?? falling down over large red letters that spell out a backwards k and then cr. so basically. going insane over if this is mcr5 or not. fuck youll never get to see mcr5 will you? fucking scary, feels wrong to get excited about it without you. i hope youre okay, i really fucking hope youre okay and all this is for nothing i hope youre in the hospital because soneone found you before it was too late and you just cant have your phone because of it, i hope you didnt even do anything and youre just staying off tumblr just anything, please, fuck man you have to be okay alright?? im scared, i really miss you, i know we werent that close or even close at all but you mean do much to me alright i need you i need you to be fine. i hope you see this. oh, on the topic of not being close, i uh. never learned your real name. i made a small patch with your username and put it in the left breast pocket of my coat, i hope thats alright. wanted you close to me and all
i think thats it, so uh. this is goodbye i suppose. i didnt get to say goodbye before. saw your post 2 hours late. it hurts, i try not to get too caught up in the what ifs though. its hard. so goodbye friend, until next time. i hope to see you again. i love you.
I'm not dead!
I'm sorry I scared you like really badly but I'm okay
What happened was I like almost didn't but I didn't go deep enough to do any real harm to myself
I cut a little but not the full way so I'm fine but if I had went all the way I would probably be gone bc no one did like come in my room for a while after
I've just been staying off of here and not really posting because I didn't really think anyone would really care if I was dead or not
But I know you do
Also I really appreciate you saying what's been happening with MCR thank u
I know abt everything but still u telling me is really sweet, thank you
The patch is really nice, thank you
I feel like doing something similar since u did that and I probably scared the living shit out of you so yeah something with ur user maybe idk is that weird idk
I love you too man
I'm really sorry for scaring you I just didn't know what to do that day and I'm sorry for not really posting anything after that 🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤
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leebitkitty · 1 year ago
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list of skz nsfw prompts!
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minors DO NOT INTERACT with this content
note: thank you all so much for 300 followers! i srsly do not know what to say, i can't believe yall still scroll thru my content even tho i'm barely active. i will try my best to be more active from now on, as an apology for my absence and gift to my followers, i present to you a list of skz nsfw prompts :)
2nd note: not all of these prompts are mine!! cr to: @fight-me-m8 and @httpseiki !
how to request? pick the number of the prompt + pairing(s). please tell me in the ask if its gn!reader, fem!reader, or gn!afab!reader and if you don't tell me any of these, i will write for gn!reader. multiple members are allowed. next, pick the dynamic. (i.e the sub/dom/switch)
please reblog to spread and go crazy in my inbox!!
1. "caught ya, kitty."
2. "honey, you're perfect.
3. "oh, you are not wearing that."
4. "you're not.. wearing anything under that.. are you?"
5. "oh, please.. touch me already"
6. "god, you're so sickeningly beautiful"
7. "oh, fuck, it's huge."
8. "you're sitting on my lap, we're friends, and im hard. i'm sorry."
9. "p-please.. i've been so good!"
10. "beg for it then."
11. "next time, say that when i'm inside you."
12. "fucking shut up and take it!"
13. "you don't deserve it after being a brat, do you?"
14. "stop dancing like that or i'm going to cum in my pants."
15. "so needy, huh?"
16. "come and sit on my cock"
17. "i'm going to fuck you so hard you'll forget about that dumb asshole."
18. "that was the first time i'd heard you moan.. it was like a melody to my ears."
19. "i'm done being just roomates."
20. "fuck! im sorry! i shouldn't have entered.."
21. "fuck yourself and let me watch."
22. "should i give you a massage?"
23. "bold now, are we?
24. "why don't you come and join?"
25. "you just look so fuckable in my shirt."
26. "it's late, shouldn't you be asleep?"
27. "i'm going to cum if you dont stop."
28. "how was your wet dream?"
29. "stop." "no.. no fuck i can't"
30. "fuck, we really shouldn't be doing this"
31. "your brother is right outside.."
32. "let me show you just how much i love you"
33. "fuck, i can't cum like this."
34. "we're in public, honey.."
35. "ugh.. it's too early.."
36. "i'm so sorry. i didn't mean to cum in my pants."
37. "why are you worrying? thats so cute, it turns me on."
38. "fuck, i'm hard again."
39. "let's start off with touching here.."
40. "i'm sorry, i've never done.. you know.. this before."
41. "whimpering like a puppy in heat aren't you? dumb dog."
42. "yeah? you like that? you like when i touch you there?"
43. "you're mine now. never see that asshole again."
44. "fuck! it's too much.."
45. "the only thing you're getting is my thigh. c'mon, fuck yourself on it."
46. "fuck, i really need you right now."
47. "can't wait to come home to you and fuck you till the last thing you remember is my name."
48. "if you wanted me so bad you should've said it."
49. "what did i say about breaking the rules?"
50. "how about you beg for it first?"
51. "yeah? you want me to breed you? to fill you up with my load?"
52. "let's save water by showering together, baby"
53. "n-no! it's too sensitive t-there.."
54. "i'm sorry i just couldn't wait any longer.."
55. "a-ah! please, i need you so bad, i've been s-so good!"
56. "once this meeting is over, i'm going to get you back, brat."
57. "so is it me or the game, baby~"
58. "what a slut. screaming like a whore under me as i fuck your brains out."
59. "you thought i was asleep? you thought wrong."
60. "cum for me again, i know you have it in you~"
61. "does it get you hard knowing our friends are 10 feet away?"
62. "i came so hard last night just from a picture of you"
63. "stop being a fucking brat and move your hand."
64. "you're driving me crazy right now, you jerk."
65. "i love you."
© leebitkitty, 2023
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