hes good for my heart but hes bad for business???
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gender euphoria is stored in combat boots with paper clips as the zipper pulls btw
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i would like to formally apologize for all the people being rude in the tags/replies </3 you don’t deserve that
Thanks! Unfortunately one person being nice and respectable does not really make up for the barrage of absolutely insane comments that are shoved in my notes every single day since I became a mod (and even WORSE before then, I cannot even IMAGINE) but I appreciate it all the same :)
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Shaddowloie is it adoage never end up infecting her even as she was taking up souffle mace windy kid you go fuck far in the weed mace windy kid piss in urea in the emu emu emu aahh AHH ahhh ahhh ahh you go fuck it in addage in even in the addage in the reagent a chemical urea urea urea
Do I need to call someone? I mean, I'm sure Art wouldn't mind letting me borrow their communicator or phone if she has one...
Do you need to talk...? I'm here for you whenever! I mean, I don't think I could escape you, even if I tried, but that doesn't mean I won't listen.
Not like I have much of a choice, of course, but I'm pretty sure you know what I mean!
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Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".
Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"
And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".
Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.
At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.
So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!
Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!
Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!
Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.
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Trump survived. Here's what will happen.
Every media, news outlet will be showing this photo. Not of a convicted felon who was impeached, who summoned violent terrorists to the white house, who sexually assaulted many women, but of a survivor, a hero.
And Trump will win 2024. The Alt Right and his MAGA supporters will see this and be more motivated than ever to vote Trump. Centrists will see this and think "the left is so much more extreme than the right" and vote Trump. Fuck, even liberals, after seeing Bidens disastrous debate performance might vote trump. In their eyes, he's a survivor now, he's strong now, he's worthy now. If you don't believe me, wait and see the top comments of news articles, the Reddit posts, the twitter quote tweets.
It isn't if Trump wins, it's when Trump wins, Ukraine is Fucked. Palestine is extra Fucked. And of course, America is absolutely Fucked.
I don't like Biden, but Americans have to remember: you live in a two-party system.
It is Biden or Trump.
And I'd much much rather an old husk of a man that has done so much good for trans rights, social policies, and human rights in general, than Trump. Yes, Biden has sent aids to Israel. Do you think Trump won't do the same? Do you think Trump won't do worse?
"Vote for a third party, they're both awful" you might say. Come on, be realistic. This is about holding the line against fascism. It is going to be way WAY easier to change the system when you're up against milk toast Joe than an actual dictator. So,
For the love of god, vote Biden in Novermber.
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Can't wait to see how Therapist reacts on Friday to the fact that I did manage to get through the meditation video she sent me after several tries but in order to do so I had to bump the playback speed to 2.5x.
I don't want to speedrun mindfulness or whatever but these serene motherfuckers need to talk faster.
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