#just kind of noticing a trend i've seen

[platoapproved]

just to get it off my chest because it's on my mind today (and none of this is a criticism of literally anyone, i am speaking extremely broadly here):

for iwtv, i enjoy fan speculation about future possibilities and when people incorporate knowledge from the books into their reading of the series. i do this myself all the time. but i do wish sometimes that people wouldn't get so invested in stuff that's not actually present in the text that they speak as if it's canon and anything ELSE would be a divergence.

like if in later seasons it turns out daniel and armand had more interactions between san francisco and dubai, that's cool! but seeing it be the assumed default, in fanfiction and in fan discussion, is weird to me, i'm not going to lie. it's a possibility amongst many, but there is no textual basis for it yet.

which is the opposite of course to everyone deciding that the 18th century lesmand stuff, that is actually present in the show, and the truth of which is never in any way brought under suspicion, is all... false? i know it's the unreliable narrator show. but there is no other part of iwtv where if i made a gifset of a scene from the television show we all watched and enjoyed, half the comments would be giving an opinion on whether or not it happened. yes, it's different from how it happened in the books, but like.... so is.... everything else? because it's an adaptation that's making changes?

i don't think this is evil or insidious or a problem even. they're all blorbos on tumblr none of this is that serious. i'm just saying that for me, personally, it's weird.

[captainofthetidesbreath]

.

[curiouschaosstarlight]

The whole fun thing about the double standards of sexism is how it really pervades fandom and demonizes both male and female characters really fucking efficiently so everyone's fine until they say or do something that makes them "unforgivably bad" to someone, but you look at characters of the opposite gender who do the same exact things with either the same or less reasons and the same person will be totally fine with them, and also insist they're not being sexist.

[sofastuffing]

this isn't meant to be derogatory but i think one massive sign that someone's a newbie artist is the way they add very prominent warnings not to repost their work

[byuno-o]

RANDOM ASTRO OBSERVATIONS I'VE OBSERVED.

NOTE: THESE ARE BASED ON PERSONAL ANECDOTES; HENCE, MIGHT NOT BE APPLICABLE FOR EVERYONE

Pisces and Sagittarius people are not always lucky as they say. They go through the most problematic, heart-shattering events which test their ability to remain optimistic. It's like Jupiter makes them go through tough times before bestowing them with good luck.

However, for Sag and pisces rising, things are different. Jupiter might actually bestow them with good luck for a long period of time, only for them to go through tough times later. (Seen it with my own eyes.)

Capricorn sun and moon people are as social as Gemini and Libra can be. It's like they actively look for company so they don't end up with their thoughts alone.

Aries men--the unevolved ones, are overbearing to a fault. Sometimes when they try to help, they actually come off as assholes and just plain rude.

Leo moons are actually pretty shy and introverted. It's only after a few meetings do they get comfortable.

While I've read that Aquarius people are aloof and detached, that might not always be the case. I have seven friends with Aquarius sun, moon, mercury, rising and venus, and they are the most clingy people I've ever met. Some even ended up sabotaging their relationships and friendships because of their clinginess.

However, being the sister sign of Leo, they have to go through this phase in order to see the bigger picture and see humanity as a whole and not just one person. It's only after losing people do they realise their purpose, which is standing out and set trends.

I think the intuition and spiritual senses of fire signs are often overlooked. They are often guided by their intuitions, especially Leo.

I might be biased on this but, I have always share the same kind of humour with people with the same sun sign as me which is sag. Tell me if you relate. :)

Do not underestimate gemini when it comes to holding grudges. They remember everything and will hurt you where it hurts the most.

While, I'm at it, I think cancer's sharp tongue does not get much appreciation. The ones I've met either hit you with the hurtful words right onto your face with a smile, or they say hurtful things behind your back. The influence they can have on people is something I really admire.

Scorpio moons are more mature than scorpio suns. Idk, I just never met a mature scorpio sun but I have two friends with scorpio moon who are wise beyond their years.

Libra women, for some reason, lack confidence when it comes to their creativity, and face problems putting their art out. it's just something I've noticed since some women I know (who are libras) never tell their ideas to anyone out loud.

Nonetheless, their allure can only be rivalled by a Taurus or a Leo.

That is it for today. do let me know what you think about my observations. Let's have a discussion.

[absolutebl]

This Week in BL - Getting hot under the collar and in the kitchen and on the pool table and...

Organized, in each category, with ones I'm enjoying most at the top.

Aug 2024 Week 3

Ongoing Series - Thai

Monster Next Door (Thai Thurs Gaga ) eps 3-4 of 12 - one of the things I'm enjoying about this show is the fact that the introverted super shy uke is having hot fantasies, and the extroverted seme is having the sweet fantasies. It's another way this show is highlighting God being the world's greenest flagged seme BL has ever produced. (And he's being given stiff competition this year - trend alert.)

Anygay: God is so cute and so not cool and so in love and all the consent asking word salad coming out of this boy. I LOVE him. 

Diew: It’s ep 4 so I’ve decided we can talk face-to-face.  God: So how many children do you want? 

The teaching him to play basketball bit, where God politely asks to hold his hand, is so freaking adorable I can’t.

I'm thinking of calling this show the anti-Mame pill.

Blue pill? Red pill? GREEN pill!

My Love Mix-Up Th (Fri YT) ep 11 of 12 - We gotta talk. I do like this version, but it’s starting to feel lackluster. Perhaps it always was by comparison to the bright sparkle uniqueness of the original. Perhaps I didn't notice because I was distracted by G4. But now I gotta say it's become a bit disappointing and even my love for G4 can’t seem to bind me to this. Frankly, this show is making me want to watch either the Japanese version, or My School President. It’s never a good sign when a currently airing BL makes me want to stop that and go rewatch an old one I’ve already seen.

NO SINGING.

Meanwhile, the "locked on the rooftop" trope! I haven’t seen that one in years. Cool. Also cute kisses. They learning. 

This Love Doesn't Have Long Beans (Fri iQIYI) ep 7 of 8 - I can’t believe this is ending next week. But also I can. And I have thoughts.

I really love SailubPon. They might be one of my favorite newer pairs on the scene right now. But I just don’t believe in these characters or this couple. I don’t feel like they are going to have a lasting relationship. It feels like they’re just using each other for sex and distraction, and that’s how the script to set it up, and as a result they’re never gonna make it as a couple. As soon as the sexual fire between them burns out, what do they have to build a relationship on? Frankly? That would be fine if this were a modern love drama, and not a BL. But this IS a BL.

Putting the health code violators aside, I really do believe in the secondary pair, but they haven’t been given enough bandwidth to develop as a couple. There’s no way they’re going to adequately resolve Methas and JJ in the final episode.

At this juncture, I’m mostly finding this show annoying. Which in itself is annoying, because I wanted to love it.

Why is it that Thailand, the land of the best food in the world, king of BLs, struggles so hard to produce the restaurant set BL of my dreams? I’m really pissed about this.

That said, the Methas & JJ stuff is killer. Loved JJ running away. So good. Plus the age old decision - love or money? 

Battle of the Writers (Sun YT) ep 2-3 of 12 - The issue was me and I've managed to get hold of this show again. The story within the story is so ridiculously badly written I'm going spare. I’m not sure if the outside show is not ALSO badly written. That said, I do love how the 3 writer friends are all shipping our leads. It’s VERY silly. Meanwhile, cohabitation trope is a go. 

I like the side couple too. Stern Daddy + lost puppy is a very cute dynamic, I hope we get more than just crumbs. I actually am enjoying this show now. Ep 3 kinda derailed into this weird chimera novel that they’re all writing together and I’m finding that bit the least interesting, but I adore the domestic components which I think may turn out to be TutorYim's strength (if they're allowed to lean into it). 

Addicted Heroin (Thai Tues WeTV) ep 1 of 10 - Man I hope this gets some kind of distribution at some point. It was a pain to find and watch. But I enjoyed it. The focus is more on the seme in Thailand’s version. Which I don’t mind since that's rare in BL, and it’s more August on my screen. It’s all round softer than China’s version but still feels very familiar. I know some fans are struggling with it, but not me.

Sunset X Vibes (Sat iQIYI) ep 10 of 12 - I like that Sam’s crafty business espionage has paid off. Them teasing Sam & Yo really had me belly laughing. It was so funny.

Legitimate question. Would one put perfume on one’s cheeks in Thailand, as one does on wrist or sternum? Because of the sniff cheek thing? Scented face powders?

I do feel like with MosBank & SailubPon scorching up our screens, we’re being spoiled by some of Thailand‘s best high heat pairs at the moment.

I Saw You in My Dream (Weds Gaga) ep 5 of 12 - It remains kind of sweet and cute. It's also calm and slow moving. Oddly it reminds me of La Cuisine in its style and execution (if not content). I’m enjoying it more than I thought I would.

The Trainee (Sun YouTube) ep 7 of 12 - I don’t know. I’m getting bored.

Love Sea (Sun iQIYI) ep 10fin - Fort’s acting during the break-up was truly great. But I feel for Rak. It’s rough to learn that someone else is playing a long game with feelings while you were playing a short game with d**k.

Ultimately this is probably a solid 8/10 show but I’m mad I wasn’t madder at it, and I'm mad I was so bored throughout. So it gets a 7/10 and let us not speak of this again. I’d like to simply forget about it. Trash watch.

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

Sugar Dog Life (Japan Sun grey) ep 1-2 of 10 - OMG a uni student who looks young and a... COP! GAH. The subversion and kink of it all. I had to go grey to get it and I hate everything about what I had to do. But ya know what? Fucking worth every single repeated crash-causing advertisement.

I love it. The grumpy lonely little student cook and the cheerful mature police officer. What a fabulous dynamic. Is the cook looking for a boyfriend or a Daddy, and do we care if it has the same result? It is filmed VERY manga style camp. I’m a little nervous about that, but this means it’s also very fluffy and so damn sweet. It made me squeak with the cute. I’m gutted this didn’t get distribution.

Ironic that Tawada Hideya is in a new BL while Sunspot is re-airing.

Cosmetic Playlover (Japan Tues Gaga) eps 3-4 of 8 - Ah, the gays are doubting the bisexual again. How familiar. I like how this one is paced and moving through time, even if the relationship seems to be going comparatively slowly by contrast. I love the way Sahashi is always looking at Natsume, even when they’re in conversation with someone else. Ah yearning. I think the conflict was kind of inevitable, given the two personalities of the protagonists, and I like that. (No manufactured angst here.) But I still hope they can repair the breach and I’m still interested. Frankly this is so classically Japan - I don’t know what story beats it’s following and I’m not entirely sure where it’s going, but I kinda like that unpredictability. Makes me think it could go into "must you, Japan?" territory but fingers crossed.

I Hear the Sunspot AKA Hidamari ga Kikoeru (Japan Weds Gaga) ep 9 of 10 - I'm enjoying it very much. I could do without the girl character. I know she’s more interesting than most (this is Japan after all), but she’s not really for me. It’s the complexity of the connection between the leads (and why they like each other) that’s being executed so brilliantly in this show (and in the manga, FYI). Both actors are so on point with their roles and the nuanced emotions required of these characters that every time it’s only them interacting I'm riveted. I could do without the rest of the cast tho.

Seoul Blues (Korea Fri? YouTube) ep 1 of 8 - I have a confession to make, I’ve been watching this whole series as it goes along. But this is the pair I absolutely like the most. I’m not sure I would necessarily recommend any of the installments, and I’m not sure how this one is going to go, but I’m VERY invested in this particular couple. They are so pretty!!!! This is a true friends-to-lovers struggle. I like that a lot. (Reminds me of I Cannot Reach You but a different dynamic.) Did I mention how pretty they are? And we already know they gonna kiss well. I bet the uncut version is stellar.

Meet You at the Blossom (China) - It's no one's funeral, turns out! Reports are in - not only are there kisses but it ends happily with wedding plans. So I'm eating crow, binging the fucker, and live blogging. I'm enjoying it. Ya'll know I adored Chinese BL before censorship. It has a certain unhinged quality I very much apreciate (and is the reason I'm so tolerant of the Thai pulps) that I think will marry well with Wuxia's effervescent and ever-present tropes. Watch me suffer here.

First Note Of Love (Taiwan Mon Gaga) eps 1-2 of 12 - About a singer with stage fright and his timid fan starring Charles (H4 the puppy one) and Michael Chang (the youngster in My Tooth Your Love), plus side couple featuring a Thai actor Jame (Koh in Gen Y) and Liu Min Ting (of Guardian fame). What a damn team. With their powers combined they are...

fine.

This is a fine BL. The fight scene was fun and I like the meet cute. I’m not sure about the chemistry of the leads, but I think they’ll probably do okay. I admit I’m struggling a bit with a singing and the music. Are you surprised? I think I like it enough, but I’m not wowed.

Takara's Treasure AKA Takara No Vidro (Japan Mon Gaga) ep 7 of 10 - Oh! Out of the blue attack kiss. What IS this show? I don’t get it at all. Bah. I guess they’re dating now. It’s… so odd...

It's airing but...

4 Minutes (Thai Netflix/Grey) - A rich boy at uni suddenly gains the supernatural power to see four minutes into the future. I have a source, but I've decided to hold off and binge if it ends okay, since it's only 8 eps. I depend upon y'all to tell me if it's safe.

8/16 The Last Time (Thai Fri YT) ? eps - Convoluted story of loss and possible reincarnation or something. Again delayed? Not sure what's going on with this one but the continued push-backs do not bode well.

In case you missed it

The Time of Fever AKA Unintentional Love Story 2 (Korea movie) trailer IS COMING IN SEPTEMBER!!!! (Yeah this is gonna sit here until then).

Next Week Looks Like This:

Upcoming BLs for 2024 are listed here. This list is not kept updated, so please leave a comment if you know something new or RP with additions.

Still Coming This Month!

8/22 The On1y One (Taiwan Thurs Gaga) 12 eps - announced in 2023 this one has a high school set stepbrothers trope and is reputed to be high heat. From Taiwan! It's made for me. Based on a novel Mou Mou from the Your Name Engraved Herein folks, so it could go dark. Still, I'm very excited.

8/22 The Paradise of Thorns (Thai movie) theater release - Jeff Satur is back but this does not look like a BL (the gay lover's death is the inciting event). More in Goodbye Mother vein. Looks dark and dramatic. He opposite and extremely well known actor Toey Pongsakorn who has never done gay before.

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS

WHY IS HE SO FINE?

I truly belly laughed. Sam & Yo did not go in the direction I expected, but this scene alone made me not mind that they curtailed the suffering Sam was rightfully due. (SunsetXVibes)

Tall boyfriend armpit, anyone? (Monster Next Door)

The two extremes of BL in one show (Long Beans indeed).

(Last week)

Streaming services are listed by how I (usually) watch, which is with a USA based IP, and often offset by a day because time zones are a pain.

The tag BLigade: @doorajar @solitaryandwandering @my-rose-tinted-glasses @babymbbatinygirl @babymbbatinygirl @isisanna-blog @mmastertheone @pickletrip @aliceisathome @urikawa-miyuki @tokillamonger @sunflower-positiiivity @rocketturtle4 @blglplus @anythinggoesintheshire @everlightly @renafire @mestizashinrin @bl-bam-beyond @small-dark-and-delicious @saezurumurmurs

Sigh, Tumblr in its infinite wisdom doesn't like too many tags.

[lizardsfromspace]

What's the worst thing about fandom in the last 20 years, and what's the worst thing about fandom that's always been true of it?

The worst thing about fandom in the last 20 years has been the incentivizing of fandom-as-conflict: not merely as a field in broader culture wars but as the field for endless intra-group battles.

This manifests in many ways: as seven hour videos complaining about The Last Jedi, as Twitter backlash campaigns, but also as stans defending their faves from any and all criticism real or imagined, as the endless boom-and-backlash cycle to any fandom meme or joke you see on Reddit, and as the drive for people to look for evidence other people discussing a thing they like are hysterical illiterate dolts, before anything else.

Or, in other words: a lot of fandoms are full of assholes these days, whose main interaction with fandom is using it as a reason to be an asshole, and to defend being an asshole. The actual “fandom” part of fandom no longer really exists for them. The discourse more or less is their fandom; someone whose main fandom activity is sharing videos about how Steven Universe is a fascist (?) isn’t in the Steven Universe fandom, they’re in the videos about how Steven Universe is a fascist (?) fandom. I mean, the chief fandom for many people is their side in the fandom war. What type of fanfic you write is secondary to what your affiliations are vis-a-vis battles over fanfiction

(One trend I've noticed is people who aren't at the stage where they only talk about what they hate and not what they love, but are at the stage where they can only talk about what they love in relation to what they hate. "I love this movie...and it proves this other movie is bullshit made by a hack". No ability to say just "I love this movie", period, end of sentence. This is how like two-thirds of Film Twitter talks about film, the remainder are all the grindhouse people going "man you've GOT to see Wrong Turn 5")

Another one, that I think is related, is that fandom’s become...more transitory, maybe? There’s Big Fandoms that are inescapable and then everything else feels like it’s here for a weekend and then it’s gone. And we’ve always had fandoms that endure and fandoms that vanish quickly, when the show runs short or turns out to be bad/boring, but we did use to have a lot of enduring if small fandoms for Okay shows most people hadn’t heard of and now you don’t really. Or they burn themselves out fast.

So we’ve reached this stage where fandoms are either so big they have seven hour long discourse videos, or they’re a smattering of fanart over the course of two weeks last August. But that isn’t really the fault of fans so much as modern media release schedules.

A lot of fandom activities of old are just...impossible now, with many shows? The slow build of speculation and fan works and in-jokes and theorizing and analysis simply can’t exist in a world where the premiere comes out the same day as the finale, and you can’t talk about the finale because you have no way of knowing if the person you’re talking to binged it all in one weekend or is still on episode four. That was the kind of thing that sustained the fandom of something that wasn’t a big hit, or even something that was. My fave fandom experience ever was watching the online Lost fandom wildly theorizing for all six years of Lost, and we’d never get “and what if the Smoke Monster is a dinosaur but only the head?” under a Netflix release model. Now at a base level, we either have shows nobody can discuss because nobody’s sure who’s seen or what, or shows where everyone just discusses the finale right away, and where you get One Week of Show and then a massive hiatus, which either kills all momentum or...drives fandom in the direction of hyper-analyzing everything and fighting because, well, what else is there to do? And that plus the outrage cycles of social media plus the fact that “man who yells at Star Wars” is now a viable career choice result in, well. *gestures upwards* All that

(Really, shout out to Cartoon Network for engineering the Steven Universe fandom to Be Like That through their inscrutable strategy of dropping episodes during one random week every five months or whatever)

As for something that's always been with it...cliques and a certain fannish elitism, like, that sees engaging with media in a fandom sense as more creative or analytical or intelligent than your average person. You see it now in the form of, like, people holding up fanfic above published fiction as more representative or authentic (I’ve seen more than one post on here strongly implying queer rep doesn’t exist in mainstream non-fic storytelling???), or going ��well, we think about shows, unlike those normies watching sports”. But that was probably way more pronounced a thing in the past, in the 40-50s sci-fi fans were calling non-fans "mundanes" and calling themselves "slans" as an in-group signifier (a reference to a book with superintelligent psychic mutants known as slans). Like at the very least we should be happy no one’s calling non-fans “muggles” anymore. In the evolution from “mundane” to “muggle” to “normie” normie’s probably the least bad one

[fuckyeahisawthat]

So Denis Villeneuve has this particular type of close-up shot that he uses to varying degrees in all his movies but uses a lot in Dune, particularly when shooting Paul. In fact he uses one for the very first shot of Paul in Dune Part One.

There are some common cinematographic elements that define what I would consider the Villeneuve Close-Up (TM), but I'll admit there is also a vibes-based, you-know-it-when-you-see-it element to picking out these shots, which means all discussion here is somewhat subjective and we're talking about general trends instead of fixed categories. But in general, in these shots the camera tends to be at eye-level with the character, which means it can be very low or even on the ground if they are having a floor-based experience.

Sometimes we're in a SUPER extreme close-up where the character's face is filling the frame.

Other times we are not actually that close but we know we are seeing something that other characters are not.

The character may be alone or they may be surrounded by people, but the point of these shots is to reveal something to us the audience that no one else in the scene sees, pulling us into a private emotional world where it's just us and the character. It's a very effective tool for building sympathy and emotional intimacy.

I'm not the only person who's noticed that we lose this specific kind of close-up of Paul entirely in the section of the movie after Paul drinks the Water of Life. I've seen this described as "we're no longer seeing from Paul's POV" or even "he stops being the protagonist of the movie at that point" but I don't think either of these are exactly what's going on. Seeing the world of the story through a certain character's POV is different from what I'm talking about here, and Dune Part Two takes us through many shifts in POV over the course of the movie.

What happens is that we, the audience, recoil from our close, intimate visual and emotional relationship to Paul--or maybe he withdraws from us--for a portion of the movie after he drinks the Water of Life. But, crucially, not right away.

This shot in the "we're Harkonnens" conversation is such a classic Villeneuve Close-Up (TM). We're positioned as if we're sitting right next to Paul, seeing something on his face that is mostly hidden from Jessica, who's standing across the room and slightly behind him.

I think this shot is super important for telling us (even if we only register it subconsciously) that the Paul we know is not completely dead. Drinking the Water of Life may make you see things that others can't, and it may make you a little unhinged, but it doesn't make you inhuman. There's still a person in there.

I would argue that the distancing from Paul starts in these shots:

This is still a close-up; we are not much further away from Paul than in the shot above, but the vibe is totally different. Now we are seeing him the way his followers do, closed-off and purposefully intimidating. We are seeing the image he chooses to present to the world and none of the human vulnerability underneath.

We stay at this emotional and visual distance from him for most of the rest of the movie--but not the whole thing. Because after watching Paul be a terrifying force of destruction for half an hour, we get slammed into remembering he is a person--young, hurt, alone; a person who didn't want any of this--at the very end of the movie.

I think you could make an argument for a few different shots being the first Villeneuve Close-Up of the end of the movie. But where I always notice it is here, when the Emperor is talking about Leto.

While not a particularly close close-up, I'm always struck by this shot as well:

And then we really get pulled in close to Paul during the duel--particularly at the end of the duel when he's already wounded and it seems like he might lose. We get this angle several times:

We get this shot that I'm particularly feral about...

...because while the focus of this shot is (1) the knife and (2) Feyd, someone made sure that the features you notice on Paul's face are his eyelashes and the curls of hair falling in his face, the features that make him look most soft and vulnerable.

And then of course after Paul has won the duel we get this shot, another peak Villeneuve Close-Up (TM) that I have already written about, where Paul is surrounded by people chanting his name but no one to pull the knife out of his shoulder for him.

And we hold onto that connection with Paul right up through "Lead them to paradise."

Which is an insane choice for that moment actually! Once again, this is not a super close close-up, but we're watching him from a perspective that no other character can see and we understand that there's no personal triumph in this moment for him.

Now, obviously, there are a lot of other choices being made in these scenes, in terms of writing, performance, lighting, score, everything. The camera placement is just one element supporting the overall storytelling. But it's one that's very easy to track through screenshots and a good example of how one specific element of filmmaking can be used to influence how we see a character, whether or not we even consciously notice it while immersed in the film.

[kangaracha]

QUEENMAKER | CHAPTER 17

---

pairing chan x reader

genre ninth member au, angst, fluff, coming of age, social media, cancel culture, anxiety, depression, forbidden love,

summary To JYPE, the solution is simple; take the sole trainee that will not debut with your brand new girl group, and use her to replace the missing vocalist in your male group that insisted on starting as nine.

Unfortunately, to the fans and the members themselves, it isn't that simple.

status ongoing

taglist OPEN

a/n today's self promo is catskin which is a felix x reader fantasy/fairy tale oneshot that i am pleased enough with that i might write a part two. anyway, here's more of the drama you're really here for.

previous | masterlist | next

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At 6:05 on the dot, there's a knock on your door.

He must have been up all night waiting for your text, you think as you answer it, the way that he'd made it down the stairs within five minutes of your alarm going off. You're still in your pyjamas, a hoodie thrown over the top when you'd dragged yourself out of bed to combat the early-morning cold of your apartment. 

The boys waiting outside your door are dressed similarly, at least, padding around in clothes they've chosen at random from a laundry hamper somewhere and shoes that they kick off as soon as they pass through your doorway. You're not surprised to see Chan, hair sticking up at every end like he's gotten straight out of bed for this and not bothered to even try to stick it back down again, but you are surprised to see Changbin. You don't think you've ever seen or heard a peep from Changbin at this time of the morning.

"Good morning," Chan says as you close the door, lingering within arm's reach as Changbin wanders his way further into your apartment like he's looking for something.

"Good morning," you echo, your attention divided between the two of them. "What are you doing here?"

"Well," Chan hedges, hesitating like he's not decided yet what he's going to say next. "Changbin is here to steal your cereal."

"Hyunjin ate all of mine," Changbin says, his feet carrying him one step closer to the kitchen in question.

You wave him towards it, despite warnings you've been given against ever giving him free reign over your pantry. "There's eggs in the fridge too if you want them," you offer, and your heart lifts at the way his face lights up. It's funny how such a little thing could cause such simple joy.

"Gamsamnida, noona," he says, and disappears into your kitchen. 

Chan steps into your line of vision.

"What are you doing here?" you ask when he doesn't immediately say anything, though the pit in your stomach and the sleepless night unravelling behind you say that you already know the answer.

He draws in a breath and holds it, anticipation paling his face just enough for you to notice. "I'm being honest," he says, his eyes flicking up to the kitchen door. Changbin doesn't appear - he's busy making a lot of noise with your pans in there, the slam of a cupboard door a little too obvious to be anything but deliberate. "I promised I'd be honest with you, so...I'm here."

"About the things they're saying online, or what's going to happen next?" you question; and you don't miss the way that his face falls, his brow tightening imperceptibly.

"You've seen it," he sighs, as if he'd been hoping for something different.

A grim smile twists itself around your mouth. "It's trending," you point out. "It's kind of hard to miss."

"True." He looks away, eyes casting behind him to where Changbin is being deliberately noisy in the kitchen as he hunts through your cabinets for something. "I'm sorry."

"For what?" you question. "You didn't do anything."

"They're my fans," he says and then blinks, correcting himself. "Our fans - if something I've done makes them think-"

You've seen the messages he's talking about, the back-and-forth between fans debating whether this was his idea or something that had been forced upon him by the company. Always Chan - Chan's group, Chan's members, Chan's decision. If the trending tags were anything to be believed, the general consensus was that the Chan they knew and loved would never do this to them, nor would he endorse it. It was obvious that you had forced your way into the group, and at first opportunity he would drop you right back out again; if only they screamed loudly enough in opposition, JYP would give him that choice quicker.

You didn't find that daunting at all. There wasn't a black pit opening inside your gut every time you thought about it, the urge to get back to the practice rooms and gruelling hours of work scratching at your skin. 

"You're acting like you told them to do this," you tell him wryly, and the corner of his mouth quirks upwards. Nearly a smile, despite how sardonic it feels. 

"I definitely did not," he answers, a hand pressed to his chest in honesty. "I meant what I said the other day. You're one of my people now."

Inexplicably, warmth blooms in your chest around the icy cold that has had a stranglehold around your stomach since you'd first seen...well, everything that's happening. The reminder of the conversation you'd had before all of this began is timely - it was easy to forget sometimes, around the screaming of a thousand voices that it couldn't be true, that he had chosen you, in a backwards way. That all of this was only happening now because he'd fought with the company for you. Because he'd won the fight, a feat you've never seen accomplished before, in a long career of letdowns.

Your teeth grit together at the thought of those voices online, hiding behind screens as if they know anything about what’s happened in the last three months or even the past six years. You had forgotten for a while last night, all the things that Chan had said; you’d felt like throwing something across the room, God’s Menu playing over and over through a tinny speaker until your body moved without thinking. You’ve contained most of that rage since, under the assurance that none of them know what they’re talking about, and truly, you don’t think that you’ll really care at all as the days wear on; but still-

"Someone should have told them that," you say without thinking, and then watch as Chan's brow furrows. "Sorry. I didn't mean you. It's not your fault."

"Someone will," he replies. "Once I've been to this meeting with management. Which I am probably going to be late for."

His phone appears in his hand, the screen lighting up to show him the time. "If you have to go-" you begin to say, already moving out of the way of the door.

"He's eating breakfast first," Changbin says from the kitchen door before Chan can argue with you himself. 

"Am I?" Chan asks; but his voice is mild and his feet are already turning towards Changbin, all the fight draining from his body before he has even begun.

"You think I'm going to eat all of the eggs myself?" Changbin fires right back. "I'm not a pig."

"But I thought you were a pig, Changbin," Chan says and watches in amusement as the sound of Changbin shouting indignantly fills the air of your apartment.

TAGLIST

@kokinu09 @rainfallingfromthesky @lixie-phoria @mysweethannie @chlodavids @hanniemylovelyquokka @tfshouldidohere @lauraliisa @puppysmileseungmin @kalopsian-thoughts @puppy-minnie @readerofallthingss @dvbkie099 @kthstrawberryshortcake-main @acker-night @d-chagi @lynlyndoll @borahae-reads @ihrtlix @yienmarkk @minhwa @i2innie @jinnie-ret @conwunder @amesification @starssongs98 @weirdhumanbeinglol @morinuu @the-weird-mold-in-the-sink @bokkiesplace @amyyscorner @jiisungllvr @skzstaykatsy @blackhairandbangs @jungkookies1002 @hyuuukais @imsiriuslyreal @thatonedemigodfromseoul @gini143 @mercurywritesstuff @splat00z @filmbypsh @palindrome969 @crabrangoongirl25 @enzos-shit @jabmastersupriseee @kayleefriedchicken @slutfortits @duhgurl @cheshireshiya @keepswingin

[the-moon-devi]

WEBB Persona Chart: Notes

MIDHEAVEN // ASCENDANT at 2°, 7°, 14°, 19°, 26° or Libra/ Taurus can indicate gaining attention online for your beauty/fashion /creative endeavors.

GEMINI ASCENDANT in Webb PC is typically good in my opinion due to gemini being ruled by mercury. Mercury rules over communication, and technology. I've seen this in the pc of those who have a online presence! Geminis can also be very entertaining and creative so I think this also plays into the fact of why this can be a good indication of internet fame. Gemini is also represents the messenger, so typical geminis always have something to say!

EX: Rihanna has Gemini Ascendant at 19°, shows she's very active online, and this is due to her beauty line, and of course to communicate information regarding her business. Also shows her being talked about a lot in the media, and being seen as beautiful , with Her asc ruler (mercury) heavily venusian influenced, it sits in libra 5th house so this also shows fashion, and also creativity/fame etc! Her Mercury is also at 26°! 🤭

MARS IN 1H can manifest in two ways; You could either be seen as a sex symbol online, Or attract alot of animosity and feel the need to defend yourself constantly. This can also be seen as someone who is constantly arguing online.

EX: Kim Kardashian

Neptune 1H // ASPECTING ASC can show having this glamorous and dreamy presence online. From what I've seen this can really make a Star, and someone who influences others. This placement screams stardom to me, if you have this placement and your not famous online and not want to be then this could just manifest as you literally being nonexistent online, Or if your spiritual then this can show fame for your metaphysical talents! Neptune also rules illusions of course, so this may also show appearing one way online and being completely different in public. People with this placement always have very beautiful posts, and just give off the vibe of being whatever they want to be! May even benefit from manifesting fame online!

VENUS 10H shows you will definitely be seen as beautiful or even setting fashion trends (especially if you have aqaurian influence hitting your venus) Your online presence is heavily influence by your physical and fashion. This could even manifest as art, music, etc.

VENUS IN 3H can be similar to VENUS IN 10H, I say this because 3rd house is skills, communications, conversing with the outside, and social media. The only difference is these people may be noticed for their actual skills instead of VENUS IN 10H is just noticed because of their presence. VENUS IN 3H shows this could be your voice as in singing, and people also talk about how beautiful you are as well. I feel this can make a very popular person. And of course your voice and Intellect.

EX: Rihanna & Beyoncé

FAMA 1H/ LEO can show definite fame online for your talents. Whatever sign it's in can show what kind of talents this may be. I know this girl on YouTube (Nadirah Ali) who has Fama 1h Libra, and she's a model, her shoots are gorgeous!

LIBRA ASC // JUNO ☌ ASC / / JUNO 1H can show your spouse may be involved with your presence online, Libra can manifest different from time to time because it's also creativity, but in some way love or partnership will be involved. If you have Libra Ascendant paired with juno ☌ asc or 1h then this is even more emphasized.

EX: Beyoncé Juno 1H

VENUS ☌ WEBB (3041) online attention for creativity/ visual arts/ beauty. The sign/house these two are in can show how this energy may manifest.

FOR EXAMPLE: Venus ☌ Webb in Cancer 10h can indicate being seen as very nurturing and feminine online, you being a mother could be a big part of your reputation online. You may do a lot of wholesome, and comforting art. Maybe even cooking or home decor.

Venus ☌ Webb in Leo 9h can indicate traveling, and online you are very outgoing. You may seem foreign, and adventurous to outsiders. You could even become famous in foreign lands. You may be very open about your religion/beliefs online as well. You could be the type to go all out for the holidays, and post about this online.

Beyoncé has Venus at 8° ☌ Webb at 17° in Aquarius 3h, so this for one shows how she has really changed the internet game, and has a big influence with her aqaurius influence and also this number 8 energy which also represents change and of course 17 is a longevity degree. So she has a long lasting impact on the internet with her voice, and can feel like whatever she say goes. (I think this is also attributed to the fact she has Pluto in 11h, 11h/Aqaurius rules the masses/ global impacts.) This also shows her beautiful voice/ music!

MIDHEAVEN IN PISCES// AT 12°, 24° gives star qaulity again, this alone won't necessarily indicate your absolutely going to be a star but if you have any other fame indicators then this is a nice add on to have. Midheaven in pisces will most likely be seen as having a other worldly presence online, and truly beautiful!

EX: Rihanna Pisces Midheaven

MERCURY AT 5°,17°,29° shows recignition for your voice. This could be singing or even you just being funny, and making others laugh! Also teaching others.

SUN 7H // VENUS 7H adding onto what I said above about juno/Libra. This can also show that marriage/ relationships and your connection to others whether that be platonic or romantic, may impact your reputation online, and partners will be involved.

LILITH 1H may be outcasted, or feel like the bad guy when they get on the internet. Can result in someone who gets dissed alot online or rebels against the web in some way. This can also show jealousy, and having a big sex appeal.

PLUTO 1H obsession, stalkers, and jealousy. If you have this placement expect to be seen as someone whom is mysterious, and kind of intimidating. You could change something online or even be seen as someone who attracts a lot of people to them. You have a special affect on people online, and could either be hated or loved. You could also talk about taboo things online, and your online presence may go up & down. Also a sex appeal indicator.

MOON 1H seen as someone who cares, and the mother online. A lot of people probably come to you with their problems. May be the type to post a lot about motherhood, and feminine energies. May be seen as intuitive online, More prone to talk about spiritual things.

NORTH NODE 10H the internet is meant to impact your career/reputation. May be known for having a online presence. Most likely will be very influential.

EXACILBUR (9499) 1H // ASPECTING MC, ASC indicates having a HUGE impact online. Excalibur means being chosen, and having a path that can't be taken from you. So you'll see these natives appearing powerful, and having a breakthrough online!

1H LORD IN 5H shows going viral, you could be super young, and have a huge influence on the youth. More than likely you will be showing your creative talents online!

EX: When I tell ya'll.... I just had a feeling that Ice Spice had this placement..... And I was right. 😌 She definitely has become a trend through her mannerisms, and music etc lol, and she's definitely influenced the younger generation.

1H LORD IN 2H indicates you attract alot of abundance to you online. You could benefit from having a online business or making money online. This may even be a indication of a online shopper. The internet determines your finances.

1H LORD IN 9H shows learning online, and touching the hearts of foreigners. You may find a lot of luck, and knowledge online. This is a great indication of having a big audience, and people probably watch you online to learn from you! People most likely see you as spiritual, and wise.

1H LORD IN 8H are usually the ones who talk about esoteric topics online. They are seen as very powerful, and someone who changes the minds of others. Usually will have a huge impact on others, and can be seen as someone to be feared. They can attract a lot of hate and rumors regarding their personality, and what they stand for. If not popular online you will most likely be seen as secretive, and private. People may be obsessed with you, and see you as attractive.

EX: I know someone who has this placement, but I'm not going to say their name lol. I just want to point out how powerful their placement is, and how much of their presence enlightenented alot of people online. They are a mercurial ruled rising, mercury sits in the 8th house conjunct their North Node and Jupiter (in 8th). Their purpose was to spread enlightement and knowledge (jupiter). Their voice (mercury) was meant to be heard. Their mercury & Jupiter sits at 11° and Mercury at 9° in Aries. Not to mention they are very blunt, and have a very powerful way of speaking and asserting themselves. I'll give yall a hint but they were a black man. Fox News released an article that, they are a "Violent Cult Leader" (very plutonian but , in his defense it wasn't a "cult") Iykyk.

PLUTO 1H, SCORPIO ASC, 1H LORD IN 8H, adding onto what I said in the previous observation ⤴. I've noticed all of these placements in some way attract jealousy, hate, rumors for what they do. It may not always be as intense but they hold a lot of power and influence. People want to watch them, and they have the ability to uncover a lot of hidden truths, and taboo secrets. Pluto in the 11h can even give this vibe too, but they are even more so having a huge effect on the masses. They can change and bring back trends if they wanted to. They can change their interests regarding what they consume online too. Pluto in 10h has the ability to reinvent their public persona, this is very similar to pluto 1h as well!

10H LORD IN 12H your presence online may be hidden or spiritual. You can be seen as someone who has a healing presence.

MIDHEAVEN AT FAME DEGREES (5°,17°,29°) definitely will be famous online. 5° may manifest as going viral for a short period of time, while 17° and 29° will manifest in long term fame, and impact.

10H LORD IN 8H your online presence may include divination, spirituality, and sexual/taboo topics. You will be seen as mysterious, and powerful. (Definitely should have included this with the ♇ observations above ⤴ lol)

VARUNA ASPECTING SUN, ASC, MC OR IN 1H/10H/11H can show worldwide recignition, may attract a lot of praise especially if it's sun or 11h/10h just because sun is literally where we shine, and talents. 11h is goals, and accomplishments, while 10h is literally achievements.

STELLIUMS IN HOUSES/ 2 OR MORE PLANETS IN A HOUSE can show certains aspects of where your presence online will gain a lot of attention, maybe even what your known for doing. Signs can show the energy of this!

1H STELLIUM emphasis on you, your entire being probably will attract a lot of attention. You may be very bold

3H STELLIUM emphasis on your mind, and speech.

4H STELLIUM emphasis regarding your family, and upbringing.

5H STELLIUM emphasis on your talents, and your talents. Could be children, and creativity maybe even love flings.

8H STELLIUM emphasis on your power, your enemies. What you hide, and sex life. Also people may see you as very powerful, and somewhat mysterious.

GLO (3267) IN 1H shows you have a qaulity about you that shines. You have a luminous glo to you. This can be great for fame!

STARR (4150) IN 1H indicates becoming a star online, you are someone who is looked up to. Also great for fame.

<< WEBB (3041), GLO (3267), STARR (4150), FAMA (408) >>

𝕯𝖎𝖛𝖎𝖓𝖊 𝕯𝖊'𝕷𝖚𝖝𝖊

ℭ𝔥𝔢𝔠𝔨 𝔗𝔥𝔦𝔰 𝔒𝔲𝔱!

©𝓟𝓻𝓮𝓽𝓽𝔂 𝓒𝓪𝓻𝓪𝓶𝓮𝓵

[is-the-snake-video-cute]

Here's an odd one for you. Is there any science or methodology behind, for lack of a better term, "snake charisma?"

Phantom has a very curious passive talent: people seem to like him. Even people who profess to be uncomfortable around, or even terrified of, snakes. I've observed this phenomenon with both friends and family, as well as total strangers (like contractors who come to my house to fix/set up something). I'm always respectful of peoples' fears and phobias and never push anyone to go farther than they're comfortable with, and the boys always stay in their tanks unless otherwise requested. But somehow, people seem drawn to Phantom and willing to ask questions, take pictures, or even attempt to pet him. And among people who like snakes, he's a superstar! For his vet visits all the vet techs want to stop in and visit him. It's crazy!

I thought maybe this was just a ball python thing at first. Ball pythons are pretty docile and have silly little :3 faces so maybe they come across as more approachable. But I've noticed this same trend doesn't happen with my other bp Latte.

I haven't really noticed any significant behavioral differences between the two that might make Phantom seem more approachable than Latte. Phantom is more social and adventurous, but most people wouldn't know that right away if they're nervous about even getting near the snake tanks. So I'm wondering if there's something else at work here. Have you ever seen this phenomenon with your snakes? I know you do programs and have ambassador snakes so I'm curious if there's some kind of trait or trend for this.

I'm not familiar with any relevant research here, but some snakes just have very likable personalities!

Charisma (for lack of a better word!) is something that I need to consider for my ambassadors, and a lot of the time I find it ties into traits like being more social and confident. I think we often underestimate how much people and animals can pick up on each other's energy, and some snakes are more put off by a nervous person touching them than others, and sometimes people will feel better holding a snake that is behaving very calmly.

With my sweet bp Miriam, people will very often describe her as "friendly" even before they touch her, just from something about her demeanor and the way she moves. It's hard to describe, because snakes aren't very emotive animals, but I think people just can really pick up on the vibes!

[demodraws0606]

What Cyberpunk DeadBoy Means and What it's Potentially Foreshadowing (aka very complicated analysis that makes a lot of sense and could happen depending on how colorpalet is feeling while writing the story)

Now I'm seeing so many people like running around wondering what this event could mean for the future for multiple reasons and like I've made like one post throwing my hat into the ring.

I've been frustrated with people's unwillingness to realise that this comm is prob foreshadowing because this is not the first time Colorpalet has hidden foreshadowing into comms weither subtely or not

Exemple's being :

-Akito's second comm foreshadowing his third event

-Lower's cover art literally foreshadowing what would happen to Mafuyu's phone in her event

-88 vocals being emurui and nenekasa foreshadowing the kind of dynamic the disbandement arc had with nenekasa wanting to move forward with emurui being scared of isolation

-Probably way better exemples that I forgot

I've seen people make Some assumptions which I don't agree with but there is one thing I think is true

There is 100 pourcent gonna be struggle between corporation/reality and WxS.

Purely because that's been WxS's entire theme since the beginning. They constantly bash you over the head with the theme of compromising with reality and the importance of dreams. In fact the pick of Maiki-P is not at all surprising as he basically has the same message WxS has just... well harsher.

The Big thing people have ignored however is by focusing on the lyrics, they've ignored something that's personally to me even more telling and that's the line distribution

We know for a fact colorpalet loves to mess around with line distribution, weither it's to make characters say lines that fit them or to kind of foreshadow their headspace.

Now something Big happens with the line distribution of Cyberpunk Deadboy that i've seen NO ONE notice and that's in the last chorus (that and also Tsukasa's lines which people have pointed out but it works less on it's own which is why I'm gonna analyse his lines afterwards).

This is the only time the chorus is like that, the others have a much more even distribution.

In fact the distribution choice makes it look like the rest of WxS is Talking to Rui.

It's even more evident considering the lines they chose to make WxS sing compared to only just Rui

Emu/Tsukasa/Nene saying kimi (you)

Rui saying boku (i)

Which honestly makes me think this is colorpalet foreshadowing some kind of issue reguarding specifically Rui. Remember Emu's second event ? The story of Rilley whose imagination was crippled by the industry to the point where he didn't really have any artistic vision until Emu's grandpa helped him.

In fact remember how the flashback that showcases that has Rilley working on a film

Now we get to Tsukasa's line which have been pointed out to be kind of sus but it's not just his lines.

Tsukasa refuses to sing with Rui (unless it's a line they all sing together but i consider those exceptions). In fact pretty much everyone has a duo line with each other except those two.

In fact in the section where Rui has duo lines with everybody, Tsukasa is the only one he doesnt sing with and the visuals make it clear that it's something that we're supposed to find strange

And then we of course have Tsukasa's solo lines

Tsukasa is the only one that say "fuzakeruna" outside of Rui (of course ignoring entire group WxS lines) and i've seen some people pointed out how it sounds like he's saying it in response to Rui's lines. Which I agree with.

Then we got his big boy solo lines

These lines will make more sense with my theory/analysis but right now if we go with the idea that WxS in the last chorus were speaking to Rui and Tsukasa in this comm refuses to sing with Rui then this implies those lines are Tsukasa speaking to Rui.

And this is where the insanity begins because people have pointed out a concerning trend with Ruikasa that I know some people use for shipping fuel but for me kinda feels more so like foreshadowing.

IGNORING all the ARG ass weirdness of the Fixer 2dmv, this choice to switch Ruikasa's colors have to mean something in my opinion outside of just wholesome shipping influence especially considering the two songs they do this are less than jovial.

What this kind of color switching signifies to me is that, Ruikasa somehow are/or will switch places.

And with that let me bring back Tsukasa's lines

These lines stand out because Tsukasa before remembering his dreams was extremely shallow only doing things for fame and probably the money that would come with it.

Now if you think about everything I've layed out I think you can gain a pretty clear picture.

Of Rui falling into the trap Rilley did, becoming jaded and losing the true motivation of his dream (or at least starting to have doubts). Becoming stuck with the struggle of managing dreams and reality.

Rui's costume even has a mask which can be a metaphor for his artistic voice and individuality being silenced .

Which now you get into the line distribution where WxS is implied to be talking to Rui.

And you get to Tsukasa, who is refusing to sing with Rui and in fact seems to be arguing with Rui if we really want to overthink it. In fact almost switching their roles from the main story.

Because Tsukasa has grown now and how else to show that growth than to switch Rui and Tsukasa's perspectives/roles.

Now how this would happen really depends since there are multiple ways they can go about it with the time they have.

There is obviously mystery dude dude (who i know now is sakaki) who still gives me bad vibes. However there is actually two way they can make mystery dude trigger this sort of plot :

-Mystery dude is malicious and actively manipulates/confronts Rui to make him rethink his worldview

-Mystery dude isn't malicious but instead is just jaded/has been through a lot of industry bullshit which ends up rubbing off on Rui accidentally

But you can even just not have mystery dude involved with this at all (which i doubt but still) because you know what loose plotpoint is still lingering over WxS, fucking Asahi

Rui still has not talked about Asahi to WxS, in fact Curtain Call ends on an explicit cliffhanger which is never really emotionally concluded (at least in Rui's own events, technically the arc ender did but there are still a lot of loose threads from that arc). Why would Colorpalet make Asahi come back after Rui graduates, they could've just had him disappear into the sunset but instead they hint at his potential comeback.

Unless Rui will be forced to again confront similar feelings he did during Curtain Call this time with possibly an added layer of whatever happens during WxS's freelance arc.

Anyways yeah this is overly complicated but then again colorpalet is not being easy with us so...yeah.

[autistichalsin]

Okay, can I vent about a trend in Halsin fics for a moment? I notice this the most in Halstarion fics, but it seems to happen a lot in others as well. Like! I love y'all to bits, but we really need to stop with the trope of Halsin bringing up his enslavement to, say, Astarion, and this being IMMEDIATELY disclaimed with "that definitely isn't as bad as 200 years, but." We need to stop making their relationship a game of trauma olympics, and especially a game of trauma olympics where Halsin is ALWAYS the loser, always there to just to prop up Astarion's narrative/trauma. What is the point of saying "it wasn't as bad as yours?" Does Astarion lose anything at all if it isn't said that three years of slavery to a Drow matron mother isn't "as bad" as 200 years to a vampire?

And similar happens to other ships too! It just helps further this frustrating (to me) trend where even on the rare times when Halsin is acknowledged as something besides a therapist and comforter for other characters (which is a problem for almost every Halsin ship, for the record) there's still a deep need to make sure it's clear that his problems aren't ACTUALLY that bad, so no worries, he can still continue to dispense comfort to his partner!

It's just weird to me because I have never seen this kind of downplaying for any other character. Every other character has their trauma acknowledged in fics, but Halsin specifically... it's like people are allergic to validating his trauma. Is it because the allure of the archetype he fits when this is done (kind seme with no problems of his own) is more appealing than the reality?

Like, I'm just saying, I've never seen, say, a Halsin/Gale fic where Gale tells Halsin, "I know being infected with that orb was nowhere near as bad as being a sex slave, but." It only goes one way, with Halsin's trauma being underplayed compared to others.

And like! If it was just a point of characterization, of Halsin trying to ignore his own problems to focus on helping others, I'd get that too... if he was EVER called on it and told his trauma was 'enough', but that never happens!

(Please note that this isn't directed at any individual, either: if your fic happens to cast Halsin in a caretaker role, that's fine! I'm grumbling at the trend, not at any one particular individual whose fic might be part of it.)

[trillscienceofficer]

I made myself rewatch “Blood Fever” and, in the spirit of analyzing all the times B'Elanna was under the influence of alien crap as the only times in which she shows overt interest in men, this dialogue really caught my attention:

Tom: Sorry. Try to stay calm. I know it's hard. B'Elanna: You don't know anything. I feel like I'm crawling out of my skin. I need to do something. I can't take this. (She pushes Paris to the ground and straddles him. He pushes her off.) B'Elanna: You've never been hard to get, Tom. Tom: Well, I'm making an exception. I can't let you do this. B'Elanna: Oh, I'll bet you wish you could. All those invitations to dinner. And on the holodeck, the way you would stare at me when you thought I wasn't looking, and get jealous when I'm with someone else. You can't tell me you're not interested in me. Tom: You're right. I can't. B'Elanna Then don't push me away. Tom: Oh, believe me, I'd like to, but I know this isn't really you. You've made it clear that you're not interested, and I have to accept that's how you feel, even now. B'Elanna: No. No, it isn't. I was, I was just afraid to admit it. You see, I've wanted this for so long. (She kisses him.) B'Elanna Just let it happen. (More kisses.) Tom: I hope someday you'll say that to me and mean it.

So obviously this is B'Elanna almost at the end of her rope (the way she says that she feel like she's crawling out of her skin...) and the whole talk she gives about how she's seen the way Tom acts towards her is undoubtedly an act of desperation. B'Elanna is trying to wear his ethical concerns thin by pointing out that she knows what he's been doing, she's aware of his interest in her, so he could give in to his desires and have sex with her. Also obviously, that's fucked up!

But what I find most interesting in this scene is the fact that B'Elanna can explain so vividly how she knows Tom is attracted to her (the part I highlighted in purple), even in her state. She can recall precisely the instances in which she has observed Tom's interest. Now compare it with how she tries to talk about her own feelings towards Tom (in orange). It's much more perfunctory, a convenient explanation rather than a precise description of when and how her attraction developed. Even Tom seems rather unconvinced by the ‘I was afraid to admit it’ explanation, in addition to his obvious worry about her current state.

Now, I'm aware that B'Elanna is actually afraid of admitting any kind of feeling because she's so scared of letting go and letting people see her whole self, something Tom also points out to her at the end of the episode. So it is certainly a good interpretation to see B'Elanna's previous rejection of Tom as her being simply afraid of getting too close, especially to a human who might not be able to ‘handle her Klingon side’ just like her father wasn't able to deal with her mother and her (ie, afraid she'll be at the receiving end of more racial harassment).

Yet, I keep returning to the fact that B'Elanna was so precise when describing Tom's attraction to her but not vice-versa. I realize that in general women find it difficult to untangle their attraction to men from the attention they get from men. The latter is usually a strong component of the former for many women, and learning to separate the two things is often a long and difficult process. This is, I believe, part and parcel of the reality of living in a sexist society. With this perspective it's not surprising, imho, that B'Elanna finds it much easier to tell Tom about the way she's noticed his attention on her, rather than make a convincing case for her own feelings, even thinking of B'Elanna as completely straight.

But, but. As I've said at the beginning of this post, “Blood Fever” is part of a trend where B'Elanna is shown being attracted to men when under the influence of alien weirdness (the other episodes where this happens are “Persistence of Vision”, “Remember” and “Scientific Method”). It's probably the most obvious example of the whole trend, actually. The ‘sex pollen’ that makes B'Elanna act so irrationally is a strange offshoot of the Vulcan Pon Farr, something she only caught because Vorik (also not in his right mind) attacked her. (I think it's particularly fraught that all this is happening to her because she was essentially assaulted!!) And the dialogue above is so revealing to me, in the context of this trend—she knows of Tom's attraction to her, she's known for a long a time, but when it comes to her own desires her thoughts are much more nebulous and vague.

And it's not just in that particular scene I quoted, either. For example, earlier in the episode she bites Tom, but she doesn't seem super sure of why she did that (because again, she is not thinking very clearly):

Tom: [...] If I remember my Klingon customs, biting someone on the face means... B'Elanna: I know what it means. All right, so maybe I do feel something, some kind of instinct. What am I supposed to do about it?

And when pressed, she defaults to old Klingon wisdom:

Tom: B'Elanna, stop it! This isn't about the gun. This is about sex. But that's not gonna happen right now. B'Elanna: I think it is. See, I have picked up your scent, Tom. I've tasted your blood.

Part of it is Trek being always super weird about Klingon sex (this episode is certainly a prime example of that weirdness), and not having anything to say about it except for formulaic references. But also, taken all together, it's clear that B'Elanna is going through the motions of (Klingon) heterosexual practices because she has no other recourse, and Tom is just conveniently there, and conveniently already interested in her.

I think Tom calling her out on her pretense is already an obvious indicator that we shouldn't be taking what B'Elanna says of her own feelings at face value, but I would go even further and say that the way she acts is also hardly revealing of ‘true feelings’, much like her dreams in “Remember” were not her own. I'd say that seeing this episode as another example of B'Elanna being closeted is in fact just as viable an interpretation as the one that the episode puts forward (her being afraid of getting close to Tom); the two things aren't even mutually exclusive, in fact.

I've said before that the way Voyager puts B'Elanna in these situations where she has little to no control is an attempt to break her open and have her finally admit her feelings, because she's generally so closed off. So I'm aware of the narrative devices at play here. And yet, when these devices are being used so consistently when it comes to her relationship to Tom, I think it's interesting to look into it more deeply. B'Elanna and Tom were already playfully bickering and flirting even before “Blood Fever”, but it's only afterwards that it becomes really overt. I think part of it is because B'Elanna is now sure that he's interested in her (he admitted it to her), and he's shown himself to be a honorable man. It is honest attention; it's safe to reciprocate, and he won't take advantage of her. Yet the only way she's able to confess any feelings to him it's in the moments right before certain death in “Day of Honor”—her ambivalence never ceases to be there. It's even present all the way up to “Scientific Method”, where yet another instance of alien interference finally lets (?) her enjoy being close to Tom.

Again, I don't think it's at all a stretch to interpret all of this from the lens of a closeted B'Elanna—and “Blood Fever” unwittingly brings another argument in its favor, by having B'Elanna so clearly aware of Tom's feelings but not her own towards him.

[rosyronkey]

hi! i wrote an essay about rosy ronkey and her clothes, and i hypothesized what time period i think shes from/inspired by ^^ below if you wanna read more :))

ive been fixated (or had a special interest or whatever you want to call it) on rosy ronkey for a YEAR today. i've always been pretty interested in her outfit from an aesthetically pleasing point of view, but recently i wanted to see if i could find any trends and time periods in the inspirations of her clothes, which is what this essay is about! it’s going to be an explanation of most of her clothes, top to bottom, from what i can assume with the research i've done. i say research, but i probably don’t have the best sources? they’ll be linked below, but it was really more cross-referencing than anything else lol

i reached out to annie montgomerie for comment/criticism, but she’s obviously very busy and i enjoyed my research from a subjective point of view :)

basic specs on rosy (no one else but me cares): looking at rosy, the only zoomorphic, or animal looking, aspect of hers is her head. judging by proportions and cross-referencing, she looks to have the body of an american girl doll. this is just what i’ve noticed, but annie’s most recent stuff is way less anthropomorphized compared to rosy and the group she was made with. looking at annie’s most recent exhibit, hand me downs, every single piece is completely animal, with hand-sculpted claws, paws, wings and hooves. some of these dolls legs still look like american girl doll legs, but most everything else is animalistic. this isn’t important, but i just thought id mention it because artists’ growth over time is cool!

starting with her coat, it looks like a double-breasted red childrens’ coat with two rows of two buttons each. these kinds of coats are still available today, but i could find the closest matches by looking at 1920s childrens’ coats, specifically rothschild coats. the rothschild family has a long and complicated history, but all that’s important to know is that they are new york based (which doesn’t totally fit my assumptions about her; in general i assume all of annie montgomerie’s dolls are british because of her nationality) and they’ve been in business for over 100 years. by cross-referencing the growing style of double-breasted coats in the 1920s, and the style of rothschild childrens’ coats in ads from the time, i feel like it’s easy to assume rosy's character has this coat, or at least was very heavily inspired by it.

a theory i’ve seen before is that the ticket on her coat is a luggage label. these were used during WWII to evacuate british children during the blitz. the history press site says luggage labels listed “name, school and evacuation authority,” and is also where i got most of my information. i want to tentatively deny this theory. i'm pretty sure the ticket is an annie montgomerie staple opposed to a part of rosys' character. she's shown with the tag in the yorkshire sculpture park video, and on gerard way’s website, but she’s missing it in all the photos posted by annie montgomerie herself on facebook and instagram. almost every single annie montgomerie piece on display or for sale has a tag as well. i love this theory, and it’s probably what got me interested in researching her outfit in the first place, but i don’t think i could prove it if i tried.

other than the ticket, she has white roses on the left side of her coat and some smaller twigs? sticks? pinned to her collar. white roses symbolize purity, youthfulness, innocence, and in some contexts, respect for the departed. i couldn’t find any historical photos of children with roses in their outfits, but across the board that was the result i got for their meaning. i can’t discern what she has on her right collar for the life of me, if someone else can figure this out, PLEASE tell me

her dress is pink, with a cinched embroidered waist and a peter pan collar. peter pan collars became popular in the 1920s, and have been a staple of childrens’ dresses since (sources for this one were a few blogs and wikipedia, but also some ads, so i feel pretty confident with it.) some ads for girls’ dresses in the 1920s had the same soft pleats and embroidered waist as seen on rosys’ dress. i don’t think there’s a meaning behind the color, except that it compliments the red coat and her fur.

her stockings are standard, I couldn’t find much special meaning behind them, british children have been wearing stockings forever, and for girls especially, stockings became more popular in the 1920s as dresses got shorter. usually they were sheer and nude, and rosys’ look like the gray kind kids wear today, but i think it’s still period appropriate to an extent. her shoes look like red mary janes for american girl dolls, just more scuffed and dirtied. mary jane shoes themselves have been around for a while (called “bar shoes” originally,) but they got their name in 1904. in one of the first drafts for this, i read the fairy tale “the red shoes” to see if it offered any insight. i thought it’d be fun to relate, but it’s just a popular danish fairy tale, and it was hard for me to entertain the idea for long.

TLDR: i think rosy ronkeys outfit is inspired by british 1920s fashion!

that’s all I have! i apologize if this was underwhelming or overwhelming or whatever, i had no model to base this off of and the only tumblr essays i read are from my friends <3 i hope you enjoyed! i love rosy ronkey!

link to my dumbfuck google doc with all the links and braindump on it :)

[ofmdsalt]

i do think it’s funny that the gentlebeardies who proclaim their love for the revenge crew don’t actually talk that much about or create content for the revenge crew. they don’t give a shit about the “boatful of queer poc that Izzy sold out” (LMFAO) unless they can use the crew’s diversity as some kind of moral gotcha. they care about GB because that’s the only thing that matters about the show in their eyes. and it’s so fucking unoriginal!!! just endless regurgitated post about “omg they’re soooo in love~~ and isn’t it great that love conquered all their problems~~!” it’s unoriginal derivative dreck unless they have to invent new ways to lie about how izzy deserves the death penalty.

oh anon you get me

you have no idea how much i hate the diversity of the crew being used as a literal weapon in this fandom when it comes to demonizing izzy and washing Ed and Stede of any of their wrong doings.

im frustrated by the use of the crew in season 2 only because it was so painfully obvious to me that the budget cuts really affected the ensemble. the way the Swede and Buttons were written out of the show felt rushed and like it came out of nowhere, especially as those two characters, felt the 'least' developed out of the rest of them. so giving them both this long winded set up to be written out was too clunky for me.

i miss when Frenchie was singing and strumming along on his lute. i miss when Jim was Jim, because lbr that was Vico in s2. it just felt like Jim wasn't there anymore. i can't say what happened in the writer's room at that time or what sort of material Vico was given or if it skewed more to improve, but a lot of what was established for the characters in s1 was missing for me.

the rhetoric of this being the Ed&Stede show i think did more harm than good. the assertion that the other characters are only here in service of Ed and Stede's development reduces the sense of scale and scope and also agency these characters have.

a lot of the foundational aspects of GB as a ship i think falls a bit too much into fan service. people talk about how revolutionary and groundbreaking the ship is as a cis gay couple on screen. as if it hasn't been seen before. like i didn't get the wow moment of Stede in the mermaid costume as other fans did. Stede's dream at the beginning of season 2 with him killing Izzy and then colliding with Ed in this romantic gesture of love and passion on the beach is straight up fantasy for Stede, but i think fans took the idea of Stede literally killing Izzy a bit too seriously because that is Stede's fantasy. he wanted his reunion with Ed to be simple and understandable. that it was all Izzy's fault when the reality of the situation was so much messier and complicated. like David and the writers were literally telling us that Izzy is not the enemy here because this moment on the beach was pure fantasy. and fantasies can be dangerous

and then the fans said that Izzy deserved it, should have had his second leg shot and amputated, that he deserved to die, that he's still a nuisance even in death despite the fact that he's dead. that is both a master manipulator but also a cringe fail loser incapable of doing anything right. and it's like. okay. you don't seem to understand this character either.

like a lot of the problems in this fandom have existed before and will continue to exist in other iterations. every fandom has its ship wars. every fandom has long ass call out posts about characters they don't like. but let's not pretend this is anything revolutionary

what i've noticed is that this fandom will reach a burnout period and it's probably already upon us. the constant need to be like 'we're trending!!' when all algorithms are dog shit and glitchy as hell doesn't mean anything. plus the fact that there are only two seasons, less BTS content to go around, it's all coming from the same overdrawn well and eventually it will come up empty.

it's okay to step back. it's okay to leave a fandom for a bit and come back to it years down the road. it's okay. but all of this is exhausting