#just in case any of my like minds followers wondered - i am not normal about other things too

[laurelwen]

The Widow Bonnet and Annie Hall

(a repost of my 5-15-22 Reddit post for posterity)

So, the first time we see Mary as The Widow Bonnet, her wardrobe has changed significantly. While living with Stede, she dressed in fairly conventional, vaguely 18th century clothing. After her emancipation, we see her wearing clothing that leans very heavily toward a more modern menswear aesthetic: darker, textured suiting fabrics, plain shirts, and ties. Her looks immediately made me think of Diane Keaton's iconic style, which is so famously highlighted in the movie Annie Hall. After a long search through the snippets of showrunner interviews and the costume department Instagram posts/comments and failing to find any reference to inspiration for Mary's costumes, I decided to make the case myself.

After tracking down a number of screenshots of Mary and Keaton, I am more convinced than ever that Christine Wada was inspired by Keaton and Annie Hall in particular. It makes sense as a source of inspiration: Annie starts out the movie uncertain, lacking confidence, allowing herself to be steered by the man she is dating, following a path chosen by someone else. Later, she gains confidence, independence, and thrives on her own while pursuing a career as an artist (singer). Diane Keaton famously styled her own character for that film and has maintained a signature look incorporating a lot of the same cues throughout her life: menswear in a neutral palette, often slightly oversized or loosely tailored pieces, including ties, waistcoats, and blazers. Mary seems to have a very similar aesthetic in her post-Stede life, which tracks with her journey--coming into her own ON her own and reveling in her independence. Mary is absolutely thriving when Stede returns, and like Annie, she isn't going to be drawn backward and subsumed into her old relationship or patterns.

The vest and tie signature look:

You cannot possibly argue that anything about this is coincidental:

These looks are less direct, but there's an obvious through line:

[reiding-writing]

hi!! huge congrats on 2k!

I was wondering if I could get a workshop session?

I was thinking early seasons (1 or early 2) spencer who is experiencing extreme jealousy over reader (maybe an ex of hers comes back, or there's someone hitting on her) and he's super confused on why he's feeling like this and goes to someone (likely morgan) is like man. what is wrong with me.

and morgan's like hey. let me touch your hand when I say this. (& is more serious than normal because he knows how powerful of any emotion extreme jealousy can be).

WRONG SUITOR — SPENCER REID!

spencer doesn’t understand why he hates it when you smile at other guys.

spencer reid x reader | fluff | 0.9k | event masterlist.

main masterlist.

a/n — obliviously jealous spencer is the best spencer

Spencer couldn’t shake the feeling.

It gnawed at him, deep and unfamiliar, every time he glanced over at you.

You were standing near the coffee machine, laughing at something James, a colleague from the field office, had said.

The way you leaned in, smiling, just seemed to prod at something raw in Spencer. His hands fidgeted with the book he wasn’t reading, his mind racing far too fast to keep up.

Jealousy.

That’s what it was, wasn’t it? But why? He wasn’t dating you or anything.

You were just... friends.

Sure, he cared about you, more than he would admit, even to himself, but this wasn’t supposed to happen. Not to him. Not like this.

He watched James’ hand brush your arm, the way you genuinely seemed to enjoy being in his presence and listening to what he had to say, and something inside Spencer tightened.

His breath hitched, heart thudding painfully in his chest.

What was he feeling? Why did it physically hurt? He’d read about jealousy, studied it, even profiled it countless times. But to feel it so intensely terrified him.

It was something that happened to other people, something he’d see from the outside. He wasn’t supposed to feel it himself.

He wasn’t supposed to sit there at his desk like an idiot and think about the fact that you’d never smiled that brightly in his direction or laughed genuinely at one of his dumb science ‘jokes’.

He wasn’t supposed to imagine a sinkhole that swallowed James whole so he’d never have to see you look at him ever again.

He didn’t like it at all.

With his mind spiralling, he pushed away from his desk and made a proverbial beeline for Morgan’s.

He felt a different type of jealousy at how relaxed Morgan seemed—eyes glued to a case file with a pen between his teeth—but his head lifted when Spencer approached, his brows furrowing in concern.

"Hey, pretty boy, what’s up? Why do you look like that?" Morgan tilted his head at the sudden approach, casually leaning back in his chair. Spencer just sighed.

He didn’t know how to start, how to explain his thought process without sounding like an absolute creep or just plain psychotic. He ran a hand through his hair, the discomfort clear in his posture.

"I... I don’t understand what’s wrong with me," Spencer said finally, the frustration spilling into his voice as he glances over in your direction. "Every time I see her with someone else, it’s like—I don’t know—this... this knot in my chest, and I can’t focus. I’ve never felt this before, and I’m not sure why it’s happening now."

Morgan’s eyes followed Spencer’s, expression softening instantly as he caught sight of you. There were sparks of amusement in his eyes, but he knew this wasn’t a time for teasing. He beckoned Spencer a little closer with his hand, letting it rest on his shoulder and giving him a look more serious than Spencer expected.

“Reid…” Morgan sighs like Spencer’s blind, like he’s trying to figure out how to let the news break easily.

“I’m jealous, I know,” Spencer rips off the bandaid for him.

"Hey, man," Morgan presses his lips together sympathetically. "It happens,”

“But why am I jealous-? I don’t—” Spencer cuts himself off frustratedly.

“It's because you care about her, Reid. More than just as a friend.” He paused, watching the realisation flicker across Spencer’s face.

"But—" Spencer stammered, his mind racing. "I don’t—I mean, I’ve never thought about—"

Morgan smiled softly but didn’t let it go. “You have, man. You just didn’t recognize it before now. And that’s okay. But you need to face it, or it’ll eat at you.”

Spencer blinked, his mind whirling, trying to process everything Morgan was saying. Was that it? He had feelings for you? Feelings he had been too blind, or too afraid, to admit?

Morgan squeezed his hand against Spencer’s shoulder with an exasperated sigh. “You gotta figure this out, man. Don’t let it fester. If you care about her, really care, talk to her. Trust me.”

Spencer nodded, but his thoughts were still a mess.

Honestly, he wasn’t expecting Morgan to even take him seriously, let alone offer him genuine advice instead of making fun of him for his apparently glaringly obvious crush on you.

It must be bad.

Spencer glanced over at you again, and this time, instead of just jealousy and frustration, he felt something clearer. Something deeper.

Maybe Morgan was right.

Maybe it was time to stop running from it.

Maybe, it was time to tell you.

[freuleinanna]

ngl van helsing and mina's relarionship is very very dear to me and does in fact have me in chokehold

we're expecting jack seward to be van helsing's protégé, them being academics and jack having been vh's student. and yet jack is the least flexible in his beliefs. meanwhile mina, despite not having any relevant education, demonstrates all qualities that van helsing seeks and respects!

she's anticipating the need for a record and typewrites her and jonathan's diaries in advance, plus later continues her task to make sure they all have access to the least available bit of information (to which van helsing refers a LOT closer to the end)

she's quick-minded and can surprise the old professor (cue the 'teehee sure read my diaries oops it's in shorthand' scene, after which vh basically goes I AM ADOPTING HER, teary-eyed)

she has a chronical case of understanding him instantly. parallel the scene with jack 'WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN ELEPHANTS LIVE LONGER' seward and the scene with mina 'SAY NO MORE I GOT YOU DRACULA IS FLEEING BACK HOME' harker, it's just so funny to me

van helsing constantly saying how he needs jack to have an open mind, yet here's madam mina, self-educated on the horrors in castle dracula, asking van helsing himself to keep an open mind as he reads the diaries!

in van helsing's memorandum he says she obediently does anything he asks. she even gets up to leave the wafer circle, although she can't. like.... she knows that van helsing is testing her, and helps willingly. she feels the changes in herself, and she allows her friend to carry out his research too.

they are SO quick to follow each other's thoughts! mina discovers hypnotism as means to speak freely and calls for van helsing right away. and he gets her without missing a beat

don't even get me started on every time mina saves the situation and van helsing muttering 'wonderful woman!' under his breath. he cares for her so deeply it's insane and heart-warming and bittersweet

and that damn november 4 entry? van helsing being afraid, afraid, afraid! of mina and the changes she undergoes. yet he continues to care about his friend. huge thanks to @re-dracula for bringing each emotion to life in such a vivid manner

in conclusion, mina harker is van helsing's spiritual kin and i am not normal about it

[cuubism]

physical therapy, part 6.

--

Hob's been wavering on things like timeline with Dream because, well, he doesn't want to push, but he does obviously want more. There's a lot that he wants, and he thinks Dream wants it too. But Hob can be patient. Definitely. For sure. He's the epitome of patience.

In any case, after a few more dates which are oh so very patient, and in which Dream seems to be gradually coming more and more out of his shell, Hob finally takes the plunge and texts him:

If you want, come over to my place this weekend and I'll cook for you, and adds his address.

He paces nervously while waiting for a response. Dream coming over... he doesn't know how that would end. Well, it would hopefully at least end in Dream eating a proper meal, but other than that...

It's really not so long before he gets a response, though it feels like an eternity.

Okay, writes Dream, with a smile. 🙂 Should I bring anything?

Just yourself, writes Hob.

A shame, for I was planning to arrive incorporeally.

Hob smiles to himself at the comment. Dream is so much brighter once he decides he’s allowed to be.

On the agreed-upon date, Hob spends a truly excessive amount of time getting ready. He’s not even cooking anything elaborate, as he felt convinced he’d wind up fucking it up out of nerves if he did. But really, the quality of his food isn’t the wild card. What he’s nervous about is Dream’s response to being in his home. To being alone. Whether he’ll be okay with it. He doesn’t want to make Dream nervous.

But Dream arrives on time, and he’s smiling when Hob opens the door. He’s also carrying a huge canvas.

Oh!” Hob says, distracted from even kissing him hello. “What have you got there?”

“It is for you,” Dream says, and turns the canvas around so Hob can see it.

It’s a large painting of a rather clever-looking cat, bright colors and bold swathes of paint. It reminds Hob of Dream’s finger paintings, actually, but far more precise in technique. It’s lovely. It’s so cute. And much more playful than Dream’s older art, the pieces he had shown Hob from before his injury.

“Oh, it’s gorgeous,”  he says, and Dream smiles shyly. “I take it your grip’s been feeling steadier, then?”

“Somewhat,” Dream says, following Hob deeper into the flat, as Hob takes the painting and sets it on top of a low bookshelf, propped against the wall. Later he’ll have to hang it up properly. “I am. Enjoying painting again. I think.”

It’s so good to hear. Each time Hob sees Dream he seems incrementally better. Less frozen. More outgoing. And it always makes Hob realize that he’s only gotten to see a fraction of the life that truly exists inside of him.

“I’m so glad to hear that, darling,” he says.

It hurts to think of the version of Dream that might have been there before being hurt. But Hob likes the Dream that he gets to know now.

He leads Dream into the kitchen and bids him to sit down at the table while Hob serves their food, which is staying warm on the stove. Normally, when he invites someone over, he’d offer them wine, but he doesn’t want Dream to get the wrong idea. God, he’s probably massively overthinking things. He’s being totally paranoid, he knows it. But it feels so important that it be right. He’d never forgive himself if he made Dream feel unsafe around him, even if it was by accident.

“I am curious what you’ve prepared to attempt to persuade me to change my habits,” Dream says, after taking a sip of the water Hob’s handed him.

“Something with a lot of butter,” Hob says, and Dream laughs softly. Dream needs it, though. He needs something that’ll stick to his bones.

What he has is tarragon chicken—fried in, truly, an excessive amount of butter—served over rice with string beans. If this can’t encourage Dream to eat real meals, nothing can.

And, gratifyingly, he’s right. Dream devours it, and has seconds. As he eats his own serving more sedately Hob wonders when the last time was that somebody actually cooked for him.

They barely even talk, but Hob doesn’t mind. He just wants Dream to eat.

“You can cook,” Dream says, and Hob laughs.

“Was that in question?”

A light blush graces Dream’s cheeks. “When you first mentioned cooking for me, I had the thought that you were a catch. For that reason among others.”

Hob can’t help himself from smiling—and perhaps blushing a bit, too. “I’ll have to keep it up, and maybe you’ll keep me.”

Dream looks down at his food, but murmurs, “I would like to.”

So Hob takes his hand on the table and squeezes it.

Later in the evening, when they’ve been ensconced on the couch for a while watching mindless telly, Dream’s head on his shoulder, Hob says, “You can stay over if you want. No expectations. Just don’t want you walking home in the dark.”

He’ll walk Dream home if that’s what he really wants, but it’s already midnight and it really might be easier to just stay put.

“Am I allowed to stay over in your bed?” Dream asks, and Hob’s pulse jumps.

“That’s what you want?”

Dream nods.

So, heart still beating hard, Hob says, “Alright. Come on, then.”

And Dream takes his hand as Hob draws him up.

He gets Dream situated with some of his pajamas, which are far too large on him, and with a spare toothbrush and so on, and when they’re finally ready he tries not to be too awkward or nervous as he climbs into bed and gestures Dream to follow, saying, “Come on, love.”

He expects Dream might hesitate, but he doesn’t, just crawls into bed after him and presses himself all up against Hob’s body, laying his head on Hob’s chest. And— God. He’s really decided that he trusts Hob. It puts a lump in Hob’s throat.

He feels like a fucking teenager again, stomach all fluttery just at the feeling of Dream lying against him. In past relationships, Hob had mostly jumped in sex-first, questions-later. But maybe there are more benefits to taking things slow than he thought. It makes every tiny thing feel monumental.

“Comfortable?” he asks, and Dream nods, hair brushing Hob’s chin.

“Yes, thank you.”

Hob pulls the blankets up over them, pets his hair. Dream lets out a long, happy sigh, and snuggles closer.

I’m going to keep you, Hob thinks. “Goodnight, Dream,” he says.

[navybrat817]

Preliminary

Pairing: Sugar Daddy!Andy Barber x Female Reader Summary: You give Andy a call, but may have more questions than answers. Word Count: Over 1.3k Warnings: No major warnings. Reader is broke (is that a warning?), Andy Barber (he's a warning, okay?) A/N: Follow up to Keep the Change and building this world! Beta read by the lovely @whisperlullaby (thank you!), but any and all mistakes are my own. Moodboard by yours truly, divider by the amazing @firefly-graphics, and warning banner by the wonderful @sgt-seabass. Please follow @navybrat817-sideblog for new fics and notifications. Comments, reblogs, feedback are welcome!

You weren’t sure how you made it through the rest of your shift when all you wanted to do was call Andy. It was late by the time you got home and refused to disturb him at that time. You couldn’t sleep though. Not when your mind raced with the possibilities of what the potential job could be.

Maybe he needs a personal assistant. Could I handle someone that handsome being my boss?

Researching Andy on the internet didn’t calm your thoughts. From what you gathered, he had practiced law before he invested in a friend’s real estate company. When that took off, he invested in additional real estate and a range of various businesses and companies. He did well for himself, but you refused to look at his speculated net worth.

It’s not like he’s going to hand any of his cash directly over to me.

Andy was also single. At least, he wasn't married anymore. A quiet divorce before he made his money. You could only imagine how difficult it had to be for him to date. How many people wanted his money and nothing more?

A man as handsome as him, you couldn't picture him sleeping alone. Was it wrong that your gaze lingered on a few photos of him in his suits? Was his beard as soft as it looked?

You decided to call him the next morning. Normally you would have had your first cup of coffee consumed by then, but you didn’t want to be jittery on the call. Your fingers drummed nervously on the counter anyway as you waited for him to answer. Maybe it was too early. Or maybe he was like you and needed caffeine before he conversed with others.

“This is Andy,” the deep voice rang through the phone once he picked up.

“Hi,” your voice cracked. Cringing, you pulled the phone away to clear your throat. “Sorry about that.”

“Hi, honey. Don’t be sorry. I was expecting your call,” his voice softened, a bashful smile forming on your face when he recognized your voice.

A smile that quickly shifted to a yawn.

This call is off to a wonderful start.

“You didn't just wake up, did you?” he asked. "Did you sleep okay?"

“I'm fine. I just haven’t had my caffeine yet,” you tried to joke.

“I know that feeling,” he chuckled. “I hope it wasn't rude of me to ask. I just want to make sure you’re getting enough rest.”

“So you overtip when someone stiffs me, you want to make sure I’m sleeping enough, and you have a possible job for me?” you asked.

You didn’t want to sound suspicious since he was nothing but kind to you. The question is why he’s so nice. You weren’t naive enough to ignore that he was somewhat of a powerful man. Probably liked being in control. Money could get people like him far. You, on the other hand, didn’t have any. Power, money, anything.

You didn’t want to be a charity case.

“You don’t trust my intentions,” he mused.

You bit the inside of your cheek as you thought of how to respond. Saying the wrong thing could cost you whatever he had to offer. On the other hand, transparency might be the best option.

“I want to trust your intentions. It’s just that most people today don’t display kindness without expecting something in return,” you said carefully, keeping the device at your ear as you grabbed a coffee mug out of the cupboard. “I don’t want to lump you in that category and I hope it doesn’t sound like I am. I think part of me is waiting for the other shoe to drop because my luck hasn’t been so great. I guess I’m being cautiously optimistic.”

Andy hummed on the other end of the line, but didn’t say anything.

You closed your eyes, an apology on the tip of your tongue as your stomach sank. Why did you have to say what you did? It didn't matter. Beneath the nerves, you were proud of yourself for answering truthfully.

Though at this point, you waited for Andy to tell you to get rid of his card and not call again.

Would it be a blessing if he stopped coming into the diner so you could save face, or a curse that you pissed off a great customer and might never see him again?

"I appreciate your honesty."

You opened your eyes and pulled the phone away for a second to look at it. Surely you misheard him. "You do?"

"Yes, I do. You wouldn't believe how many people tell me what they think I want to hear instead of the truth. Maybe they do it to spare my feelings or avoid confrontation, but it's a hindrance more than anything."

"So you prefer honesty?" you asked. "Even if it's something you don't want to hear?"

"One thing you'll learn about me is that I value honesty," he said.

You wondered how many other things you'd learn.

"An ex-lawyer who likes to hear the truth."

"You did your research on me," he said.

"I may have a little," you admitted, your cheeks hot when he chuckled again.

I can't think a laugh sounds sexy if I work for him.

"Research is a good thing. I would expect anyone to do so before switching jobs."

"Speaking of that," you began, eager to shift the conversation to work and not about looking him up on the internet. "You still haven't told me what this job is all about. I'm not even sure which business it's for."

"Do you have your resume ready?" he asked.

Why isn't he answering my question?

"I do," you answered, glancing at your printer where your recent copy was sitting. "Though I can't exactly tailor it to the specific job if I don't know what it is, Mr. Barber."

"Call me Andy," he said. It was more a command than a suggestion, but somehow made you feel at ease. "I'd prefer to discuss the details in person."

You took a chance by calling, now you could take it a step further and meet him.

"And where would you like to discuss the details, Andy?"

"Are you free for lunch today? We can meet at The Courthouse at 12pm."

The Courthouse was one of the nicest restaurants in the city. The tip Andy left you the night before could maybe cover the price of an entree. Thankfully you still had a couple of decent outfits from when you had an office job.

"I'm free," you said. Luckily you had the day off. "I didn't know they were open for lunch."

"They usually open at 4pm, but they make exceptions."

What's it like to have that kind of sway over anyone?

"I don't want to go to the trouble of doing that."

"I already did," he said confidently. "I told you I was expecting your call."

"What if I had to work today?" you asked.

"I would have had to find a way to convince you to call in. And if I have my way, you'll be quitting there very soon."

"That's if I accept the job," you said, smiling as you leaned your hip against the counter. "But I'll be happy to discuss the details over lunch."

"I can send a car to pick you up," he offered.

"I'll take a cab, but thank you."

A car was too much for a job discussion and you didn't want his driver to see where you lived.

"I'll cover the cost of the cab and lunch," he said, leaving you no room to protest. "I look forward to seeing you."

You tapped a fingertip against your mug when he hung up. His businesses looked legitimate, so you didn't believe he would ask you to do something illegal. He also didn't seem like the type to waste his time and play games.

You had nothing to lose.

Here's to being cautiously optimistic.

Are we excited to meet Andy for lunch? Love and thanks for reading! 💙

Masterlist ⚓ Andy Barber Masterlist ⚓ Ko-Fi

[letsatomicbanana]

Have any headcanons about my boy Ink sans??

Oh boy, i sure do!

It's yapping time!!! but it's bellow the 'read more'

(spoilers: It's long as hell)

-First of all, Ink can not stand normal texturized clothing and textures (like cotton, fur, silk etc...) which is the reason to why their clothes are always created by him and is used a more paint-like 'esque' to it. (which is canon).

- Case in point, he suffers from 'unable to have normal fashion tastes' disease. He's the type of motherfucker to wear baggy pants under a dress, sandles with socks on, a crop top over a long sleeved shirt etc... They does not care nor follows society's fashion sense/brands, he only gives a damn if the clothes are comfortable or not lmao.

- Genderqueer, no explanation for that one (c'mon, just look at them) also AroAce but that's already canon.

- He definetly has a whole collection of autographs of random sanses that he managed to get. (The obvious one is fell sans but he prob forgot to who the other's belongs to).

- Besides from being able to speak french, they can also speak fluent mandarin and japanese!

- Has a whole collection of random objects he found while travelling AU's. It's not anything particulary useful or collectible (like toys etc..) more so 'things he found interesting' (like that one chesse from the ruins)

- Since he has a canon hyperfixation on Underfell, i like to image that he defends the AU with his whole tiny body, empty mind and non-existent soul (he can't STAND uf slander, it makes his blood boil lmao). Also, they treats fell sans like you would treat your favourite fictional babygirl male character as.

- Definetly engaged in the consumption of illicit drugs at some point in his life, you cannot tell me that this curious asshole never had any interest in drugs, even if it's just recreational consumption. Very open to any options, but they has a thing for marijuana, alcohol, and nicotine (it makes him ADHD go bonkers).

- Now that i've mentioned it. He has ADHD-C (combined type), probably got diagnosed because he saw a random 'Does your child have ADHD' pamphlets hanging around in the wall of some random AU they visited, which made him to be deeply curious (he thought they didn't had it) and eventually diagnosed with it. Note! He's currently unmedicated (i think he would have a problematic history with medications, if i'm going to be honest). (him having adhd is kindaaaa canon??? semi-canon at least)

- Also has undiagnosed Autism and ASPD (sociopathy) in which he has no idea that he has lmao (i made a whole post about this too). Note but i'm killing anyone who says that Ink is evil due to being 'sociopatic'.

- Doesn't engaje in social gatherings of any kind unless extremly necessary, he's energetic but an introvert at heart (this is canon btw).

- Has a better conection to inanimate objects than people, oh! and he's also Objectum!

- They're an ISTP! Which stands for 'Introvert', 'Observant', 'Thinking' and 'Prospective'.

- A lot of times deeply wonders to his apparent lack of family and AU, he won't admit but he's feels a sense of envy for other sanses that have brothers. They also often wanders through the vast multiverse looking for his original family/AU, but he can never find it :(

- Extremly sensitivite to any topics of discussion/conversation that relates to his soullessness, he also cannot stand being called 'emotionless' or a 'tragedy' because of his condition. Has a tendency in de'humanizing' himself over his lack of soul.

- Since he has a very hard time understanding social interaction, they often uses their interest in art as a way to form attachments with people, like painting them outfits or portraits (insert the 'Im bad at people, but i am good at tech' entrapta quote). Art is his special interest!

- He's a very dedicated brony and their favourite pony is Derpy Hooves/ Ditzy Doo!! She's literally him, for real! If he was part of the fandom at it's peak popularity in 2012-2014, they would prob be those famous fandom artist/musicians!

- Reast in piece Ink sans you would've loved Dungeons and Dragons. (/ref)

- Besides from their obvious interest in drawing/painting, he also has a deep interest in music! He canonically can play the flute but he also enjoys playing the trumpet, the piccolo and the clarinet!

- They're generally extremly under-responsive or otherwise sensory seeking to any kind of sensory stimuli. He's also a very oral artistic and often chew/bites on stuff for stimulation. Can often fall into Nonsuicidal self-injury style of stimming such as picking or pulling,when overwhelmed/underwhelmed.

- Another headcanon that he has PICA, where he often eats/craves for things that are not food, like crayons (canon).

[worlds-worst-ships]

Welcome to the home of the world's worst ships!

Hello there, I'm Jack Goodwin and this absolute affront to the natural order that I call a blog is where I take a break from the insane content I normally make where you only have one job... to have fun.

Wanna stay up to date on my video/.streaming content? Go follow @maji-man. Or just click HERE to see all my socials in one list.

Here's a post where I explain the point of the blog. I highly suggest you read it twice or more to make sure you understand.

Be warned: If you neglect this post and run your mouth in my comments, chances are I'll make fun of you in my videos and streams. Now then, down to business.

Are there two characters that absolutely should not be anywhere near each other, to the point where one should be getting a restraining order? Are there pairings in fiction that you couldn't be paid a quadrillion rubles to come up with on your own? Are you sick of all these picket-fence, vanilla pudding, ERENxMIKASA snoozefests that plague the internet? If so, you've come to the right place. Get your kissy-kissy lips on, find a slightly uncomfortable chair and LETS GET SHIPPING!!!

I have only FOUR RULES HERE:

You can say whatever you want here, so long as;

1. Its not discriminatory

Any sort of phobia/ism here is not welcome. This blog is for everyone, regardless of ethnicity, orientation or gender identity.

2. Its a joke,

and clearly a joke. We poke fun at each other here. Lets keep it fun.

3. Its true.

I have the power of google, and any misinformation will be swiftly corrected. When you are corrected, either accept it or be blocked. Misinformation and straight up lies are not welcome here.

4: You speak with the understanding that these characters aren't real people, nor do they represent them

These are cartoons. Works of fiction. They're not real. Please keep any deep-seated obsession with character's ethnicity, sexuality, age, background etc to yourself. Acting holier-than-thou and making that the subject of your personal issue with my posts doesn't make you a hero, nor is that the groundbreaking opinion you think it is, it just makes the jokes awkward and uncomfortable for many people here.

Aaaaanyways, now we've got that out of the way (and yes, I will add more rules as the need arises, don't test me)

I'll mostly be using the absolute maelstrom of doodoo I call a brain to come up with ideas, but if you'd like to submit some ideas of your own, feel free. Send it to my ASK box. Nothing illegal, past a certain point, please.

Oh, and the ask criteria/format is in the linked post below. (Anonymous asks are and will always be turned off, cuz I know that this site is full of pussies who can't talk shit on main)

JUST IN CASE YOU DIDN'T READ THAT POST, AS I KNOW MOST OF YOU WON'T: If you do not follow that exact format, I WILL DELETE YOUR ASKS ON SIGHT.

I REPEAT: I will not even CONSIDER posting them.

FUN FACT: After having this blog for multiple months with anonymous asks turned off, I haven't gotten a single hate message (other than that one kid who got made a fool out of). This is why they're off, in case you wondered.

Its also worth mentioning, some of you are new to the concept of comedy, so I'll write it nice and big for you (if you know what a crackship/joke is, then skip this paragraph): THIS IS A JOKE BLOG. A GIMMICK BLOG. A COMEDY BLOG. I DO NOT CARE EVEN SLIGHTLY ABOUT SHIPPING AS A CONCEPT MUCH LESS DO I EVEN KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT 9/10 OF THE CHARACTERS YOU'LL SEE HERE, SO IM JUST MAKING J O K E S. IF YOU ARE OFFENDED, THEN YOU HAVE KNOWINGLY CHOSEN TO BE OFFENDED WHICH IS ENTIRELY YOUR FAULT. THANK YOU :)

I REPEAT this is a CRACKSHIP BLOG, so if you're deeply hurt by any of my polls, just know that nothing here reflects me as a person because none of what I post is serious. If anything you see after reading that causes you any emotional distress, it IS NOT my fault. Its funny, but its not my fault.

[ya-zz]

Hii! I love your work and I'm a recent follower, so I wanted to request something a little selfish for me! If it's okay, and if you're willing, could I have some headcannons with Ramattra, Genji and Lifeweaver with a deaf!reader? I'd love to hear your thoughts about how quick they would pick up on sign language, and maybe reader giving them a cute allias in sign language? Per example, instead of signing Genji ’s name letter by letter, I would simply sign "My Dragon". Again, this is an extremely specific request so if you choose to pass it on, it's completely okay! Much love to you 🌺

This was such a cute thing to write, selfish or not. I don't really see many fics or hc's out there about this sorta thing, so I am glad to write this! Hope this is what you were looking for! ♥

RAMATTRA

Ramattra never knew why you didn’t speak to him, only when someone mentioned that you couldn’t hear him did he realise the issue. 

It also explained why you never answered him. You didn’t even know he was talking.

He researched how to apologise so he could have some peace of mind. He wasn’t mad, but he did wish someone would’ve told him sooner.

He searched for any module possible to instantly talk to you. 

However, there was the issue of finding the right module. 

With the many variations of sign language, he had to find the one that matched yours. 

It took some time, but when he found the correct module, he was practically fluent in sign language, though he was still slow at talking. 

It warms his circuits the moment he first signed to you and you smiled with a sparkle in your eyes. 

His joints weren’t used to doing intricate hand signs, but over time, he got used to it. 

Day after day he would sit with you to learn how to sign efficiently. 

It was a learning curve to him, one he was grateful for as you were the one teaching him.

He was advancing in a way he had never imagined, especially with a human. 

One day while signing with him, having what seemed like a normal conversation, you had signed something he hadn’t seen before. 

It took his processors a moment to work it out and when he realised what you had signed, he chuckled, signing “thank you” towards you with a tilt of his head. 

“My omnic”.

GENJI

You had been responding to the ninja fairly well, but when you didn’t respond to his callout once, he wondered if you had ignored him. 

He approached you, a little cautious in case you were annoyed at him, but when he realised you were constantly looking at his lips, it clicked for him. 

Genji was close to you, figured you were just the quite kid, but being deaf was something he hadn’t thought about. 

He spent that night researching and practising sign language.

It was a slow process for the ninja; he was always too distracted, but he picked up words and phrases to impress you. 

Maybe a month went by before he finally managed to say a full sentence without any mistakes, but the fact that he was trying was enough for you. 

After awhile, Genji would try to learn more.

He would take online classes to make sure he was doing the correct hand movements; that he was making sense. 

Sometimes he would mess up, but that was okay.

The ninja spent his free time learning full sentences, eventually leading up to a full conversation with you.

It made you warm with happiness that he went through the effort to learn something new. 

Sign language was hard, and with Genji being constantly distracted, it only made it slower to learn and he was several months in to learning. 

Though, when you signed something to him that he had never learnt, he stumbled, thinking about it for the rest of the day before he researched what you had said. 

A genuine smile appears on his face when he learns what you called him. 

“My dragon.”

LIFEWEAVER

Niran had some knowledge of sign language prior to meeting you.

When he heard you were deaf, he was excited to speak to you, though his speech was limited. 

Seeing him interact with you was comforting, even if he did get embarrassed about his mistakes. 

He would spend most of his nights practising, relearning what he already knew and focussing on his weaker points.

Niran would always go to you for help, wanting to know if he’s signing right and what he needs to work on. 

It was like you were a tutor to him, one he felt comfortable around. 

When he wasn’t working on his biology and science, he would study some more.

There was always room for improvement. 

His mind was taken up by you, the want and need to impress you, no matter how many mistakes he made. It was all apart of the process.

Everything was going smoothly. His nightly studying was paying off and he was starting to fully understand conversation.

It only took a couple months for him to be fluent, the perks of being a fast learner but also sticking to a regime.

There was the odd occasion where he would mess up, but even you wouldn’t lie that you did it too.

He was fond of your presence, much like you were fond of his.

Niran was surprised when you signed a different name for him, one that made his cheeks flush the same pink colour.

“My lotus.”

[musings-of-a-rose]

What the Hell Are Fancams?

Pairing: Teacher Ben (SNL) x f!reader

Word Count: 2500+

Rating: Mature - 18+ ONLY!

Warnings: Just like ao3, “creator chooses not to use warnings.” If you click Keep Reading, that means you agree that you’re the age to handle mature themes. Also by clicking Keep Reading, you understand warnings may not be complete in order to avoid spoilers for the story. 

Notes: Absolutely felt called out during the SNL sketch with Teacher Ben but I knew I had to write a little something for him. I'm pulling from my own experience as an ASL interpreter in the school system (glad I finally can incorporate it!). Thanks to @vanemando15 for her help in this and for being a beta!

**If you want to be added to the taglist, join here or let me know!

Main Masterlist

Teacher Ben Masterlist

What the Hell Are Fancams? PART 2

New year, new school, new student. Such is the life of an American Sign Language interpreter when you work in schools. 

My last student moved out of the district so I was assigned a different one. This student's interpreter wanted to go back to work with the little ones and while I loved my time with them, it was time to swap grades. 

My student is amazing and comes from a rare family, in that she is the only member that is Deaf but everyone in her life learned ASL from the moment she failed her hearing test. In most families it's the complete opposite, causing significant language delays and isolation. It never fails to blow my mind how many people won't learn a language for their child, especially when they'd both be starting from the beginning. 

This student, Chelsea, I had worked with from her time in pre-k to 5th grade. It was great already having an established repertoire with a student and we easily fell back into our normal chatter, her filling me in on anything I missed for the few years I was back in Pre-K.

So how's this school? I ask, as she's been here 2 years already.

Not bad. Teachers are mostly ok. Too much homework though.

That's usually the case with high school. Any favorite classes?

I like acting class, but my favorite teacher is Mr. Ben. He teaches marine biology.  She gives me a look I can't discern at this.

Oh? 

Yeah you know, like about the whales you like and other ocean stuff. 

You're in marine bio 2 and you're calling it ocean stuff? Sounds like a great ocean stuff teacher.

She rolls her eyes at me. You know what I mean. Plus he's…

He's..what?

She smirks her mischievous smile that I know can only mean trouble. Nothing. Don't worry about it. 

Chelsea-

Oh look we're at math class.

Saved by the bell, indeed. 

After math was lunch, followed by marine biology. Since it was the first day, I decided to eat quickly and get to the next class a little early so I can start on my "who I am and where I and my student need to be placed" speel. Although he may not need it since Chelsea was in his class before. Still, you never know what a previous interpreter did. 

I knock softly on the door and male voice tells me to come in. I push the door open and see that the teacher has his back to me, bent over his desk grabbing something. His very broad back. 

"Uh hi. I'm the interpreter for your Deaf student for next period and I'm here to answer any questions-"

He turns around and I forget what I'm saying. Bright, brown eyes focus on mine, brown hair that looks so soft with greys starting to creep in, matching the patchy facial hair he has. His nose? Don't get me started on the thoughts I'm having about that nose. He's wearing a blue plaid shirt tucked into black pants, and a tie with tropical fish on it. 

A faint pink dusts his cheeks when he looks at me. "H-hi. I'm Ben Morales. The kids call me Mr. Ben." 

He holds out his hand and I shake it, willing my nerves to not come through it. God he's hot. I wonder if this is what Chelsea was talking about. In fact, I'm sure it is.

I launch into my speel, albeit a little faster than I normally would, but Ben just nods along and does whatever I ask of him. 

"Do you have any questions?" I ask.

"Um… not right now. You're a little different than the last interpreter." He coughs and takes a sip from his water bottle.

"Ah yeah we all do things a little different. Is there anything that worked well for the student and you that I can accommodate?"

He chokes on his water, coughing violently. I move quickly, thumping him on the back but his face keeps getting redder. 

"You-" He coughs "-want to go on-" He coughs more "- a date?"

It's my turn to have my cheeks heat up. "I- what? No I said accommodate… are you ok?"

He nods, muttering something like "Oh shit" under his breath as he turns away from me, his coughs dying down. But before we can talk more, the bell rings and students start moving about the halls. 

"Well let me know if there's anything I can do to date you, Mr. Ben. ACCOMMODATE! Accommodate you!"

Fuck. Me. 

A tap on my shoulder and I turn to see Chelsea, lips upturned in that mischievous smirk. 

I see you've met Mr. Ben.

I have. He's…nice.

Yeah, nice. Is that why your face is all sweaty and warm?

What? 

She laughs and takes her seat, eyes flicking between me and Mr. Ben as the bell rings and he starts his lecture. 

—----

I find myself making it to that class a few minutes before the bell rings just to have a moment to talk to him. When I can talk, that is. I've never met someone who makes me trip over my words as much as he does. But soon, we settle into a routine, after bonding over our mutual love of orca whales. A couple weeks in, I bought him a brightly colored tie with orcas swimming on it. The smile he had could be seen from space. 

Chelsea can't seem to wipe the smirk from her face whenever she sees us talking. 

He likes you. Chelsea signs, giving me a wink.

Focus on your test, Chelsea. 

It's hard to when you guys are up there yelling your love for each other. You should ask him out. 

This has nothing to do with your classwork. And this is highly inappropriate. 

She scoffs. You've known me forever. 

Yes but you're not an adult. 

I'll be 16 soon. And I'm not an idiot. Everyone knows you guys like each other. 

What do you mean "everyone"?

She gestures around the room. Everyone. It's in the fancams too.

The..what? 

F-A-N-C-A-M-S. She repeats the sign. 

Thanks but I have no clue what that is. 

She laughs and Mr. Ben walks over. 

"Everything ok? Any questions?" He's talking directly to Chelsea and not addressing me, which is exactly what I told him to do on day one.

"No, I'm good Mr. Ben. I was just telling my interpreter about fancams." I voice for her, trying to keep my cool.

His face goes blank. "The what?"

She laughs. "You don't know?"

Before he can answer the bell rings and we head off to next period. 

At the end of the day, Chelsea takes my phone and pulls up one of these fancams and wow. It's basically a Mashup of hidden video and photos taken of Mr. Ben that have been heavily edited and music added, making him look hot. How is this appro-

Oh shit I'm in this one. Apparently Chelsea is not the only one to try and push us together. 

Shit. 

The next day, I make it to his class early as usual. He walks from around his desk to lean sit in front of it.

"Hey Mr. Ben."

"How many times do I have to tell you to call me Ben?"

I smile. "Sorry. Habit."

"Hey…so what was that fancam business from yesterday?"

Oh. 

"I uh.."

"Please tell me. These kids all talk about them and I have no clue what they are."

"I don't-"

"Please?"

Oh God his eyes are all big and brown and just like a damn puppy. 

I sigh, shaking my head when I realize that was audible and I'm staring too long into his eyes. I could get lost in those eyes. 

I pull my phone out and walk over to him, leaning my butt against the desk next to him. 

"Ok, so please remember that I was shown these and am in no way affiliated with the creation of the fancams."

He chuckles, leaning in closer to me. He smells good, like fresh parchment and aftershave. 

"Are you ok?" He asks me.

"What? Oh yeah. Uh the fan cams."

I scroll through and pull one up, handing him my phone as it plays. His face becomes redder as it plays on. 

"I uh..who…who made these?"

"I'm not sure. Chelsea said a bunch of the students did-"

"There's more than one??"

"Y-yeah. Look." I swipe through a few more until it settles on the one that puts us together. I try to swipe past it but he catches sight of it before I can.

"What was that one?"

"Oh nothing. It's nothing."

"But it had my face-"

"Just another fancam."

"And yours."

"Kids these days. They will make any-anything."

"I can't see it?"

"Uh nah you don't want to-"

"Oh I think I need to see it."

He's not pressuring me at all, more like flirting, but…that's not possible. There's no way he holds the same crush for me as I do for him, right? 

My boldness coming from some tucked away insanity, I reach over and swipe the video back up, letting him watch it in its entirety. 

"The kids…want us to go on a date?"

"Apparently so. C-crazy, right?" I swallow hard, hoping he can't hear the way my heart is pounding though my chest, his scent filling my head and making it very hard to focus. 

"I don't think it's crazy."

RIIIIING!

That fucking bell ruins everything. 

At the staff meeting the next morning, they ask for chaperones to the homecoming dance. Teachers groan but a few hands automatically go up, volunteering their evening. I raise mine too, Chelsea already telling me she had been asked to go by the person she'd been crushing on since last school year. They had spent the entire summer learning as much ASL as they could in order to talk to her, which was too touching for words and I know it meant the world to Chelsea. I won't have to follow her around but I'll be there in case of emergencies. 

To my surprise, Ben raises his hand shortly after watching me raise mine. The admin takes down names and the meeting concludes, Ben catching up with me as I start to head out to homeroom. 

"You're volunteering too?" He asks. 

"Yeah. Chelsea is already going and while she doesn't necessarily need me, she asked me to come in case she does. I think she's nervous."

"That kid learned asl for her, right?"

I nod. "Yeah. She's super excited although she'll deny it."

"Sounds like her." 

"Mmmhmm."

We walk together for a hall or two. 

"I gotta go this way to homeroom."

"Oh. Right. Um, see you soon?"

"Yup. See you!"

—----

When I make it to his class at my usual time, I can see he's nervous about something, his eyes extra wide and small beads of sweat accumulating at his hairline. 

"HI, Ben."

"H-hi."

Silence as I unpack, but then he's standing near me and all I smell is him. 

"Can I ask you something?" He asks.

"Yeah of course."

"I…uh did.. um… would you-"

A student pops their head in, asking for clarification on the homework and he shakes his head, turning to help them.

—----

Homecoming arrives and I pick out a simple dress to wear. Not quite prom dress but definitely nicer than school attire. I head into the dance and get my assigned area and head there, milling about as people and students start to file in. Music blares as the dance starts andI  feel a tap on my shoulder. Turning, Ben is standing there, a navy built suit, dark button up shirt and - the whale tie I had given him shortly after we met. His mouth is agape as he takes me in. 

"You…you look…"

"Is that the tie I got you?

He picks up the end and looks at it. "Yeah. I thought it would go good with my outfit."

"Brings out your eyes."

"What?'

"What?"

Just then the music stops and switches to a slow dance, the DJ insisting that teachers should join in on this flashback. "True" by Spandau Ballet starts to play and a few staff members laugh and pull each other to the dance floor. 

"D-doyouwanttodance?" Ben speaks so quickly that I can't understand him.

"What?"

He sighs, gathering up…courage?

"Do you want to dance?"

Oh.

"With…you?"

"Yes. But you don't have to if you don't want to-"

"No! I want to!" Shit, was that too enthusiastic? 

He smiles, wiping his sweaty palms on his pants before offering me his hand. I take it, the warmth from his hand spreading into mine. He guides me to the dance floor and spins me to him, his hand hesitating over my hip. Gently, I place my hand over his and guide it to my hip, encouraging him to grip me with his fingers. 

His eyes find mine as he leads, neither of us saying anything, just staring into each other's eyes. My stomach is in my chest and I swear he can feel my heart pumping out of my chest. He's wearing cologne tonight, but underneath it I can smell that familiar smell of him that makes me forget words. A minute passes before he leans in and speaks in my ear. 

"You know we're going to be in another fancam because of this, right?"

I laugh. "You're probably right. But it's worth it."

He pulls back and looks at me again, his brown eyes sparkling as he stares deep into my eyes. The song ends but Ben doesn't drop my hand or my hip. 

"Will you come with me for a second?" He asks. 

"Of course."

Removing his hand from my hip, he winds his fingers through mine and pulls me through the crowd of students and out of the side door, turning down the hallway and moving away from the cafeteria doors. 

"Ben, what-"

He spins me around and pulls me tight to his body. His eyes flicker between mine and I can feel the nervous tension bubble between us threatening to pop. 

And then it does. 

His hands come up and cup my face, bringing his lips to mine as he places the softest kiss to my lips. He pulls back and I follow him, unwilling to let him go. 

"Was that ok? I should have asked before-"

I grip the tie around his neck and pull him to me, deepening the kiss. His lips are warm and inviting, better than anything I could imagine. His hands are gentle, one sliding around to the back of my head and the other settling on my hip, pulling me in closer. A slight moan from him goes straight through me and I can feel myself getting warm. 

The doors bang open and we fly apart, laughing nervously when the students that had come through the doors disappear down the hall to the bathroom without even spotting us. 

"Dinner?"

"Are you asking me on a date, Ben?"

He pushes his body back against mine, having felt my tug on his belt. 

"I am." His voice is somehow deeper and it goes straight between my thighs. 

"I'd love to."

He kisses me again and starts to put away, but I grip his tie tighter and pull him back down. His eyebrows scrunch together in a question. 

"Let's go check if your classroom is empty."

The question drops, lips hitching up in a knowing smile as he slides his fingers between mine, pulling me down the hall to his room. 

—----

What the Hell Are Fancams? Part 2>>

General Taglist:

@frankie-catfish-morales @chaoticgeminate @janebby @astoryisaloveaffair @balekanemohafe @greeneyedblondie44 @hoeforthefictional @marvelousmermaid @hauntedmama @giuliarogers-blog @icanbeyourjedi @diaryofkali @sunnshineeexoxo @livingmydreams13 @adventures-of-a-noodle @sara-alonso @theewokingdead @punkerthanpascal @giggly-otter @f0rever15elf @phandoz @dirtytissuebox @gallowsjoker @lovesbiggerthanpride @sarahmilesbendrix @booksarekindaneat @mrsudontknowme @swol-bear @charlispersonallyhell @xoxabs88xox @amneris21 @gooddaykate @alindeluce @avengers-fixation @paintballkid711 @harriedandharassed   @ladykatakuri @marrianena  @practicalghost @withakindheartx @batdarkladyvampir @justanotherkpopstanlol   @mermaidxatxheart @alexxavicry @ichigodjarin @justreblogginfics

[frenchtantan]

I'm not done talking about q!Baghera. Today I wanna touch on something her mind seems to tune out for her own protection: the Federation's cruelty. Now buckle up folks, given how dark her story is, this is gonna get heavy.

When she first discovered her old room, in her little diary, her past self had written the following: "they made me do things, and I couldn't stop until they were satisfied. They are never satisfied. They just want to make me miserable. They keep plucking my feathers for... a dumb reason."

This is cruel. This is child abuse, and this is torture The entire Federation would deserve to be burnt to the ground ten times over if they did this once. They did this to her every single day.

However, here's the thing: the way child q!Baghera phrases it, it almost looked like the torture was in response to her not behaving like they wanted her to. As if this unjustified abuse was somehow a punishment, something that could be somewhat avoided by her doing things differently.

We may now have an inkling that was not the case. In the "RESULTS: BAGHERA" book that she burned yesterday, we could read the following: "PREVIOUS BEHAVIORAL REPORTS DESCRIBED BAGHERA ENTERING SIMILAR UNRESPONSIVE STATES WHEN EXPOSED TO INTENSE STRESS OR HIGHLY UNPLEASANT STIMULI. HOWEVER DEPENDING ON THE CAUSE OF SAID STRESS IT MAY HAVE BEEN PRECEDED BY ATTEMPTS OF BITING HER CARETAKERS AND OTHER FEDERATION STAFF, WITH OTHER HELPLESS ATTEMPTS AT ESCAPE"

Now I don't know about you, but the way I read this, it means the torture was never a punishment. It was the experiment itself. They were deliberately, or at least knowingly, putting her in situations that could trigger her unresponsive state. How messed up is that?

This is the extend of their cruelty: they created a sentient child, but they never raised her, they never cared for her, they never tried to make her better. She was just an experiment among possibly hundreds of others. An object to poke and prod at to see how it would react. Even knowing this is roleplay, I can't think about this without getting sick to my stomach.

This is where she now knows she comes from. Where any normal child had a family's love and care, she had only the Federation's cruelty. Is it any wonder then that q!Baghera refuses to even acknowledge the torture? That her mind put walls around walls around walls to protect her from that horrific reality? That yesterday she was grasping at straws, hoping that the Federation was not as bad as she thought, in denial about what she suffered at their hands?

I am conflicted about what her burning the book meant, because she also burned all the photos. At first I thought this was just another wall, but I'm not so sure. Her room was not a bad memory, it contained everything she liked. She also didn't burn her diary. Also, she didn't look distressed, she looked angry. Her first thought went to Pomme, her daughter and therefore her family, and then came her ironic realization about the islanders building their own little prisons while trying to escape.

I believe right now she is very hopeless, and she has a lot of trauma to face in the coming days. However, the more I think of it, the more it seems yesterday's ending was not her giving up, but a spark awakening, however small. And maybe, just maybe, that spark is enough to start chipping at the walls. Time will tell.

[wimpout]

Hello again, hell site. My name is Elijah, but just call me by Eli. Unfortunately, I am back with a different account. If you remember me by my old account, congratulations! Here's a cookie.

Once again, they/them. Nothing else. Try to guess my AGAB and I blow you up with my mind.

I believe I have the most normal and non-baised takes so if you even care you should check me out. I might see you around.

I kind of have memory issues for no reason to be disclosed. It just started happening around middle school so it's out of my control. If you send in an ask about my past I might need you to be specific or else I won't know what you mean.

Well. Ciao!

-🍂

PLEASE read below cut․ tutorial on how to contribute to the blog + a few warnings․

about the mun/mod!

my name is adon! you could refer to me as adonciant or guy either! i go by he/him only- if you want to use any neopronouns, feel free. i am a minor! my main is @adonciant, which is where likes and follows will come from. of course, all my rp blogs are also listed in my pinned on main!

when a post is signed off with ~🎱, that means its me speaking. it will always be paired with ooc post

─ⵌ call me adon, he/him, a minor! main is @adonciant! ~🎱 is muns signoff

interaction!

pelipper mail/unmail/malice: allowed!

musharna mail/malice: allowed!

mystery gifts: allowed!

magic anon: allowed!

union circle: allowed!

in-character anon hate: allowed!

ooc/questions: allowed!

anyone is allowed to interact with my blogs! fallers, eeby deebys, hybrids, sapients, self-inserts, ocs, in-game characters and more alike are all very welcomed!

non-rp accounts (excluding muns) please do not reblog pokemon irl exclusive posts, or comment under any of them. additionally, if you use an rp blog that isn't pokemon irl, i will not respond to you.

if you ever want to start a roleplay, it's best to discuss it with me first within the blogs dms, unless i already allowed an offscreen post.

note: if i dont get around to an ask, never take it personally! i will always read any asks i get, but i just may not respond if i dont find it necessary, or if i am too tired. i try my best to keep all my blogs active!

─ⵌ all interaction from all blogs are allowed, unless you are non-pkmn irl. discuss offscreen roleplays with me beforehand. i may not be able to get around to your ask, but don't take it personally!

boundaries/notices

─the mod is a minor, and the character is 16! slightly suggestive asks are fine, but never should it come close to nsfw.

─if you ever want to establish a connection between our characters, or want to plan events with yours involved, i'm always open to it! just dm me on either discord [username is adonciant] or on tumblr itself. i will be more than willing to hear your ideas and see what we can do!

─often times, i will do long threads of interaction. i like to reblog back and interact, but if you ever want me to stop without a sign in the roleplay tags for it to end, please tell me! besides this, my threads do not get tagged with anything.

─the content warnings to this blog are unpredictable. as the job of the anons are to mold their story, it's hard to guess what the next thing could be. however, to list any that have popped up, experimentation. this list is always subject to change, so stay aware. any triggering topics are tagged with associated tags (tw 'topic')

─ⵌ slightly suggestive asks are allowed, but nsfw is never allowed, always try to contact me if you want to establish connections or events, and heed the warnings! [you will need to read over the warnings.]

extra notes

this is NOT the same eli from before 11/24. complete design change! their personality is the same, however. and the story is reset!

heres the good part; how does this work???

in case you werent here for the first rendition; eli is a character who is collectively expanded upon by YOU!! the community of rotomblr!

logistically, if you wonder how it works with the fact these anons would seem to know an abnormal amount of information of eli, blame it on their old account they couldnt log into ^_^

how do you contribute, you ask?

simple! my asks are open. go ahead, ask them how their life is in galar. they'll respond as if their life is in galar. well, someone else already asked if they lived in unova? they live in unova! ask how their whimsicott is doing, because now they do indeed have a whimsicott! ask how their moms funeral was! because, uh oh, now they have no mom :(

not only are asks open, but every type of interaction is allowed, even up to magic anons. if eli reblogs an ask game, he either responds appropriately to how his story has been shaped out or how i see is fit to the rest of his character! want to send musharna malice that means him seeing a nightmare of his past? say it! send pelipper mail of clothing from his dead relatives? say that!

but its important that you dont overlook the existing information other people/anons have already asked about. if they really do live in unova, you cant go out of your way to try and forcefully retcon that information: as a reminder, its a collective to create a story for them.

all that i request is that you and the rest of rotomblr make a coherent story. you build off of previous information and make it into one, stable story. they could totally have been there for opelucid city freezing, but not for lysandre attempting to use the ultimate weapon at the same time.

here's a google doc of any previous information that cannot be rewritten

this intro/full body ref will be updated if need be.

[jealousmartini]

hi, i sent this question to another blog a few weeks ago, but I didn’t receive a response. perhaps the person didn’t see my question or didn’t know how to help me with it… 🫤

of course, i don’t want to make you uncomfortable, and it’s perfectly fine if you choose not to answer it.

i’ve been part of the community since I was 14 years old, and now, in just a few months, I’ll be 17. i’ve never shifted before or experienced any “minishift” (at least, I’ve never noticed anything different in my reality).

honestly, i’ve never really cared about age when it comes to shifting. i’ve held onto the hope that I’d shift before turning 18, so I could experience a normal teenage life in various realities I’d love to explore before reaching that milestone. take dating, for instance—not that my goal is to have a boyfriend in my desired reality. i simply want to embrace everything that reality has to offer, and I don’t judge those who choose a different path.

but with this, comes that… i have a specific script that I’ve been refining over the years so that when I shift, I can go there. while I haven’t shifted yet, I keep making adjustments to the script. In this script, I have a boyfriend who is the same age as me in that reality (16 years old). he’s been my boyfriend since I created the script, and I’ve never replaced him with anyone else.

now, I’m almost 17 years old, and I still haven’t shifted. the shifting community has this sort of ‘prejudice’ against adults shifting to a reality where they date a teenager. they believe it’s wrong to shift to a reality where your mind is that of an adult, but you’re in a relationship with a teenager. i’ve been worried about this for a week now. i keep wondering, ‘Will I shift before turning 18?’ I don’t want to leave my partner in that reality, but according to the shifting community, it’s considered wrong.

but what about me? how will I be? what if I can’t change before turning 18? Will I have to give up that reality? And before someone tries to give me a ‘magical solution,’ it’s not so easy for me to just ‘change his age.’ after all, it’s set in a school environment (everything in that reality revolves around that teenage setting). It’s strange for us to see young adults aged 19 or 21 attending a school, as they should be in college, not high school.

i’ve been torturing myself with this for days, afraid that I’ll never change, and when I finally do, it’ll be after I turn 17. And right after that, I’ll have to give up my partner because I won’t be a teenager anymore; I’ll be an ‘adult’ in that reality.

i would like to be able to ask (with all due respect), for any advice or anything. i am afraid and worried, and anything you can tell me could make a big difference for me. I have been following you for some time, and I trust your help.

i hope you can understand, as I had to use a translator since I am not a native speaker.

that’s all. i hope you have a good day or a great afternoon. may the God you believe in protect you < 3

Hi sweetheart!! I've just read through your ask and I just want you to know first and foremost, that everything you are worrying about is so so valid, but at the same time there is no need to worry about it at all. Let me explain why.

As you and I both understand about shifting is that it is everyone's own personal journey (this also goes for the law of assumption), which means everyone will experience their journey however way they believe is right. But in your case (and in many others), you've seemed to fall into the trap of taking a bunch of people's own beliefs as scripture in fears that you might violate their belief; even though a big chunk of you hungers and aches to experience a specific reality.

I can tell you I have been where you are right now, so I know how you feel, babe😭 and I also want to take that weight off your back and let you know their beliefs do not have to control you and where you want to shift to and what you want to experience. The whole "adults shifting to a reality where they are a minor is wrong" is nonsensical, stupid, and hella silly. For example, There is nothing wrong with being 23 and shifting to be a high schooler again just to relive old memories or do some things differently, because all you are doing is becoming aware of a version of you who is having a bomb ass high school life.

Okay, well, what about the situation you're going through right now. Where you are turning 17 this year, but you are worried that you won't shift before you turn 18; and your boyfriend in your desired reality is 16 but you are still suck on this rule that the shifting community has made where "it is wrong to shift to a reality where you are younger when in this reality you have the mind of an adult." First of all, please let me make sure you guys understand what the process of shifting is. Shifting is when you make the conscious or subconscious decision to become aware of a specific reality. This means you are shifting your AWARENESS. NOT YOUR MIND🙏🏾

Which means that if you are an adult in this reality but you shift to a reality where you are a minor, you will NOT be shifting your adult mind into the body of your teenself. You are shifting your awareness of this reality, into another one. Also another thing. As far as I am concerned, you awareness doesnt have an age🧍🏿‍♀️ just because you might be 32 here and you shift your awareness to a reality where you are 16, does NOT AND I REPEAT. DOES NOT MEAN YOU ARE STILL GOING TO BE MENTALLY THIRTY-TWO.

Okay, so now we've debunked that👆🏾, what about your other issue. You are afraid that because you haven't shifted yet, you won't get to experience the teenage life in various different realities before you reach 18 which is your milestone. And I can already see 2 small problems. 1 is you are basing what you believe might happen on past failed attempts, and 2 is you are rushing yourself

I know how we can solve both of these issues at once. Change your mindset! And this is not hard to do, I promise, okay? I want you to do what you would normally do when you intend to shift realities, which in this case is affirming but anytime you are awake and have the time to. Literally, you could be sat doing your homework, doing dishes, having a nap, or going for a jog, and while you are doing whatever it is you are doing, affirm to yourself:

"I am a master shifter" or "I believe I am a master shifter", "I always wake up I my dr", "I am always shifting to my desired reality" "Shifting realities is easy for me" and one you can just remind yourself is "I will shift before I turn 18"/"I will shift before my milestone"

The purpose of this is to make yourself believe in yourself and your abilities. It should put your mind at ease because the more you affirm to yourself, the more you will believe what you affirm, and there for you will succeed because you believe you will.

I hope this helps you out and lots of love to you!

[avalypuff]

I’m just gonna say it.

I don’t think Zonai and Hylians are capable of reproduction under normal circumstances.

This is Not to say that I doubt the existence of Sonia and Rauru’s offspring, or Zelda’s blood relation to them, especially given that’s the one thing the game did explicitly tell us.

But on to the reason I think this—

Zelda (as a series) has kept things pretty consistent as far as Hylian/[other] hybrids, with the only exception being an obvious one that Hylians and Gerudo are compatible. But other than that, we’ve never seen anything like a Hylian x Rito/Zora/Goron/etc hybrid (ok so the Goron one makes sense because of their canon asexual reproduction, but it just felt weird excluding them from my point) and it stands to reason why.

They’re not just different races. They’re completely different species, whose differences can’t even be compared to those of a horse and donkey, or lion and tiger. Just by looking at them it’s pretty clear the different peoples throughout Hyrule have incompatible DNA.

Yes they’re all sapient and can fall in love with one another, and that’s totally real and valid! But love isn’t enough to make babies when the lovers are one bird and one fish, or in the case of Rauru and Sonia, one goat-dragon and one human-shape.

However, unlike a Zora or Rito, I believe there is one factor that Zonai could use to create life with a Hylian… their God-like magic!

That being said, I am a lover of science, and if you are too, then listen up, my friends, because I have more to explain, because I STILL don’t believe they can reproduce by [normal means] don’t make me say it… I get enough bots following me

I believe, like other Zonai magic such as ultra hand or ascend, it has to be a conscious decision. A spell, in the simplest terms. Basically, it can’t happen by accident; not to take any romance away from the act, of course! (Putting the rest under a cut cause this is getting long)

To go a bit more in depth—and please keep in mind this is treading even deeper into personal headcanon territory—I believe the magic would neutralize Zonai DNA (or whoever’s providing the sperm. In this case it’s Rauru, but I wonder if he was the only Zonai to ever fall in love with a Hylian…) and it would work kiiind of similarly to parthenogenesis with the resulting offspring being more-or-less a clone of the female parent. That’s right. I believe their child visually looks just like her mother, Sonia, though she’d probably choose her own hairstyle. lol.

Anyway, mammals aren’t actually capable of parthenogenesis, and furthermore that act doesn’t involve sperm, but it’s a cool biology thing I wanted to build a headcanon sort of based around.

I’m also a boring old fool who doesn’t like idea of Sonia birthing a furry, even though I’m all about the ship of her and Rauru. Idk. Half the time I don’t even understand me. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Anyway, I hope you enjoyed reading. If not—if you want furry baby, just know I’m not directing this at anyone or trying to dismiss their ideas. I just wanted to share my own. Peace ✌️

[princessisfinethx]

Recom Miles Quaritch x FemReader

I am really getting annoyed with the spam bots that follow you...how do I stop them? Anyways, here's a lil something new. Hope ya'll enjoy!

No Warnings applied

Check out my A03 account here&lt;3

The only true thing to be said about yourself, was you were technically a God. Not literally. But in a cosmic, or comedic sense, yes. You were one of the main scientists who restored deceased soldiers' memories and brought them back to life as a recombinant(recom) as the soldiers called them. Stable bodies 100%, perfectly reanimated. You were damn good at it too

And like a God, your believers shot you out of the sky with greed in their eyes and fangs in their smiles.

You were promoted to main physician/doctor or Medical adviser for the Na'vi soldiers. Some bullshit terminology like that, they just needed some smart ass to babysit the blue cats in case they get colds. A fucking joke that was. You had already perfected their bodies to withstand more disease, more injury than humans or animals could. They were perfect. YOU made sure of that and everyone on your team knew that.

And here you are anyway.

You were scribbling away, glancing up once in a while to look at the clock. You have a new patient arriving soon and you only looked over the picture and title. Colonel. Copying down the last patient's file, just Incase she came back with any side effects. She reported headaches, weird visuals when she slept. That was normal with every patient and headaches were mostly due to stress build up. You were hoping to see her again today, she's always cracking awful jokes that made you chuckle.

As sick as it makes you feel, you actually took your job seriously. You hated being downgraded and you wished whoever higher ups made that decision for you, would get alien bird shit in their coffee. However, you didn't hate it. Not really. You had patients you looked forward to every day, sure there was maybe one or two that gave you hell, really it's the human guys but everyone else respected you. Truly. They haven't forgotten your birthday yet either. You have pictures with most of the recom soldiers and it really made you feel good.

A thought crossed your mind, something that made that good feeling drop. You glanced down at your cabinets, seeing the lock and sighing. You haven't sent anything out yet, you'd hope they could last a few more-

Knock knock knock.

You jumped and stood up, smoothing out the wrinkles in your pants and shirt. "Come in." You watch the door open, and a tall blue figure ducking into the doorframe to fit inside. He looked at you, then around the office as he got inside. You smiled softly. "Good to see you moving around so early. Most get sick for another hour." You held your hand out. "I'm Dr. Linear."

He was still looking around. "What is this, like a principal's office?" He laughed softly. When he finally looked down at you, he bent down to shake your hand. "No disrespect to you Doctor. It's just nicer than most offices I've seen." he spots the pictures behind you. "Lotta personal touches." That american accent touched his voice.

You had a tight smile on. "Well when you work my position for a while, you grow close to your patients. In this environment it's easy to get the life drained out of you. I find a personal touch eases a lot of people in a state of comfort." You sit back down. "Not too comfortable though. Those chairs aren't cozy for Na'vi." You noticed his face as he sat, even his tail seemed irritated. He glanced at you again and smiled. "Colonel Miles Quaritch, correct?" You flipped his file open and read over a few lines. "We won't go over personal details yet, I just want to make sure you're feeling okay."

He never stopped staring at you. You weren't uncomfortable with it, but it made you wonder what he was thinking. Most soldiers need a few minutes to get accustomed to their new height and how things feel or look around them. You did hear he got to rest for an hour. He probably hasn't seen a human for this long yet. When he didn't say anything else, you continued. "A few yes or no questions. If you're unsure of one, just say unsure. Any nausea or dizziness?"

"No."

"Muscle spasms or twitches."

"Slightly, in the legs." He watched you write in your notes.

"Unusual bleeding?"

"No."

"Cough or vomiting?"

"No."

"Since it's only been about 3 hours, we'll have to wait a while before I can ask anything else." You close the book and stand, taking your flashlight with you. "Mind showing me where the spasm is?" He reaches down and lifts his pants leg. You kneel down and feel the muscle in his leg.

"Below the knee," he watches. "It stopped an hour ago." You nod and stand up again. You motion him closer, placing a hand on his cheek and checking his eyes, flashing a light for a minute and watching his pupils dilate. His ears perking up and down, and again, his tail flicked side to side. A smile touches your lips. "You'll get used to the tail, the ears though," You place the pen light down. "I think it's in touch with emotion and it's a downside that comes with the new body. That should be everything for now. Any questions or concerns you want to discuss with me before you start physical training?"

Miles was staring at you hard, his jaw flexing and you even saw his tail swing a few times. He had a lot to say, smart remarks he decided to keep to himself, until he can understand you better. His ears perk up and he smiles. "Sure." He stood up, crossing his arms. "Not to start any fires, but if you hate your job, just say so."

"Excuse me?" Your head tilted back, raising an eyebrow as you watched him.

He chuckles. "I can read you like a book, even without these new eyes or senses. You don't have to like me either 'cause I know you don't." He smirked. "Don't pretend to like people and think it would make your job easier. It doesn't." You didn't know it, but he was baiting you. How you reacted would let him know what you were really hiding. If you were calm and laughed off his words, then you actually did enjoy your job, and didn't mind the banter he brought.

"I think you've got it wrong here." You put your hands on your hips and he grinned at your reaction. His prediction was correct. "If you think I don't like you already, you're correct. My job isn't to like you, it's to make sure you're still alive." You take a step forward. "I don't pretend to like anyone here, I have my list of goods and bads in this place and I wouldn't mind telling a few off if given the chance." Your figure was tense now, and your face was the opposite of when he first walked in. This was going much better than he thought. "Lastly, nothing makes my job easier. Pretending or not, I'm stuck here. I've accepted that. Just because you're still high up in command doesn't mean you can waltz in and control my office." You were glaring now, and he just found it adorable from his height. "Now, come back in another 3 hours after your physical training and we can get this all out of the way. Then maybe if you're careful, we won't have to see each other ever again."

Usually at this part of the meeting, you would offer your patient a sucker. It was a funny idea someone gave you, so you started ordering suckers and some cheap candies. Either that or stickers. Grown ass soldiers still act like children and it made your day sometimes. But you highly doubted this man deserved anything out of the mystery bucket.

He was smiling now, but he gave a nod. He didn't say anything else as he turned and ducked out of your office. Once the door was closed, he chanced a peak through a slightly broken blind of your office window. You were slowly rubbing your face in the middle of the office, turning and walking towards the windows that pointed outside. "Never see each other again huh?" Quaritch had enough info on you now. He would have to peek at your work file later, but he could tell you were sour about something. That, and a pretty face like yours getting pissed because of him was entertaining. He didn't expect to get something out of you so quickly. He licked his lips before continuing down the hallway. "We'll see about that, Dr. Linear."

~~~

You eyeball the choices between dry bagel or dry wheat bread. You've had both for so long you could stomach either one. You decided the bagel would suffice being it could be fixed with a cheese spread or just taste healthier with the seeds sprinkled on top. Your plate now had pasta with meat and a bagel, all you were missing was juice. You’d usually drink coffee but after having 4 cups already, you decided you shouldn’t risk a heart attack. Thoughts and worries kept forming in your head, you weren’t paying attention either and mindlessly sat at a table. You kept staring at the bagel, lost in another world further than this one; you didn’t notice the plate being set down in front of you and a tall body sitting down. You then thought back to the coffee you had on your desk and wished you had brought it instead.

You pick up the bagel and bite into it, but don’t pull away from the bread. You were still. Miles watched with some concern. Finally he cleared his throat. “Are you gonna eat that or-” He couldn’t finish because of your coughing fit. You set the bread down and stare at him. After calming down, he smiled. “Ah there you are. Looked like a completely different person for a second there.” You didn’t say anything, instead you quietly sipped your juice. “I acted like an ass earlier. I’m sorry.”

That didn’t sound sincere. You looked up at him and sighed, placing your juice box. “That’s the only apology I’m gonna get?”

“Did you expect more?” His ear twitched.

“You did scare the living shit out of me just a second ago.”

“You did that yourself, doctor. Your head was in LaLa Land.” He waved his hand around. You sigh, tearing a piece of bread off and eating it, chewing quickly. He looked down at his own plate and gave an experimental taste of the pasta and meat. Still tastes like the same shit he ate before, but somehow worse. Saltier, slimey, the meat was tolerable but chewy.

“So, do you still want to interrogate me about my shitty work life? Or have you come to criticize my eating choices too?” You poke and stab some pasta with the fork. There was a chuckle and you had to glance up at him. He was watching you, those strange golden eyes filled with a curiosity you began to suspect had no end.

“I’m actually wonderin’ why I didn’t get to pick out of this uh, mystery box I heard so much about.” He smirked. “The other were talkin’ about it like it was gold.”

You had to look down to hide the smile. So they must have either ratted you out, or teased him for not getting a candy. It’s just a piece of candy. You look back up. “You ended our meeting in a rude manner, I didn’t see a reason for you to pick out the box.”

His ears flattened but his face was still relaxed. They betrayed his need to hide the annoyance. “So, what you’re saying is I have to be good at our meetings in order to pick out of this box?” Now he was leaning forward, as if you were asking him to do the impossible.

“Colonel, are your soldiers teasing you because you didn’t get a candy?” You tried to ask without smiling. You heard a snort and turned your head. Down the table, four Recoms sat, their bodies rigid and still. One of them was shaking and you realized he was laughing. When you looked at Quaritch his ears were laid back and his tail was flicking back and forth. He was looking at the group while his jaw clenched.

“No, nobody is getting teased.” He stuffed his mouth full of pasta. You nodded slowly, eating some more of your bagel. You heard someone clear their throat and continue talking as if they were having this conversation seconds ago.

“You still have to come by the office to finish up your questioning. I’ll be at the physical training area to check off some things.” You stood up and even with Quaritch sitting, he was still taller than you by two heads. “I’ll see you then.” You turned to the other group and made a face. “None of you are getting candy on your next visit.” And as you turned around to leave, the table erupted into groans and even a gasp.

As you walked away, Miles’ ears perked up, a smile on his face as the soldiers whined about the punishment. It was literally childish to be so upset over a piece of sugar. Yet here he was, however, hoping to get a piece by the end of the day.

[hyenahunt]

Rouge & Ruby: Epilogue - 2 (END)

Writer: Umeda Chitose

Season: Winter

Characters: Hiyori, Nagisa, Jun, Ibara

Proofreading: royalquintet (JP) & Skyress (ENG)

Translation: Mirei (Adam) & hyenahunt (Eve)

Hiyori: And that would mean this is the perfect time for our Venture into V-day Project, yes? Eden's Valentine's Day isn't over just yet...♪

[Read on my blog for the best viewing experience with Oi~ssu ♪]

Time: A few days later

Hiyori: Come and look! Our chocolates are still trending on social media!

They're simply so beautiful that despite their delicious taste, no one can bear to eat them and they're desperate for a way to preserve them instead!

Nagisa: ...Our fans sure think of the strangest things. Why preserve them?

Jun: Maybe they wanna keep 'em as souvenirs~?

I happened to see a blog report of someone's Chocolat Fes experience, too.

It seems like that person was also looking to keep a record of all the feelings they had during it while it was still fresh in their mind, so they poured 'em out into a post and published it on their blog.

Hiyori: So that's yet another way to preserve things, is it? It brings me such delight to know that all these memories of Chocolat Fes seem so engraved upon everyone's hearts. ♪

Nagisa: ... The atmosphere in the venue after Eden's performance was also quite impactful. How would one explain it...

Hiyori: It certainly felt as if we'd enchanted everyone into entrusting their bodies and hearts to us, didn't it? It felt the same as our usual performances, yet ever so slightly different...

Jun: Maybe that's just the atmosphere you can't experience anytime other than on Valentine's Day — or Chocolat Fes, even~

And I mean, we got the exact reaction we wanted ♪ Ibara, you feel the same way, yeah? —

Ibara: ......

Hiyori: Whatever is with that expression? Chocolat Fes went exactly as you envisioned and now we're all talking about it, Ibara — you ought to look a little more delighted!

In fact, shouldn't you be the one to talk about all this?

Ibara: — Unlike everyone else, I'm very busy being productive over here!

Besides, making Eden experience a normal Valentine’s Day or something was all Your Highness's idea, was it not?

Even though Valentine’s Day has passed, why are you making me make chocolate by hand!? I am terribly baffled!

Nagisa: ... Isn't that because Hiyori-kun wanted to experience a normal Valentine’s Day with Eden…?

Ibara: That doesn't answer my question. I demand a proper explanation, Jun.

Jun: Wha? Why're you asking me? I'm literally the second most productive one here, right after you!

Ibara: One would assume so. Though His Excellency has some experience in cooking out of personal interest, he is still new to making sweets. Meanwhile, His Highness —

Hiyori: My job is to cast a Spell of Scrumptiousness on everyone's chocolate once they're done... ♪

Ibara: — Won’t even lift a finger. He is loafing about because Jun won’t allow him to offer his assistance.

And here I am, having done all this work to find a recipe His Excellency can more easily follow, so I can delegate some of the work to him...

Nagisa: ...I've already become a master at mixing ingredients until smooth.

Ibara: Wonderful, Your Excellency, your quick learning is a valuable aid! Now, please combine the ingredients you have just mixed!

Afterwards, put the combined ingredients in plastic wrap and allow to chill in the refrigerator!

Nagisa: … Okay, I understand ♪

Jun: Well, I mean at least Nagi-senpai's actually interested in cooking. For us, I'm pretty sure it'd be faster for me to do everything on my own.

I did consider letting that guy chop the chocolate, but for some reason even just the thought of letting him hold a kitchen knife is kinda terrifying...

Hiyori: ?

Jun: ...but in any case, there's not all that much for me to explain.

Back when I had no idea you worked things out on your own and was stuck stressing over what I said to you, I tried talking it out with Ohii-san...

And during our talk, we realised neither of us had any clue what a normal Valentine's Day was like. We figured you and Nagi-senpai probably didn't either.

So it was kinda gonna be an issue if we were gonna perform at Chocolat Fes without even knowing how the average person spends Valentine's.

And that's how the Venture into V-day Project was born.

Ibara: …But if this was for Chocolat Fes, then do you not find it strange to be doing this after the event is over?

Hiyori: Well, we were just so endlessly busy all the way up until Chocolat Fes that there simply wasn't any time for it.

And now since Chocolat Fes is over, just think of this delicious chocolate-making experience as our after-party for a job well done.

Ibara: …*sigh*…

Hiyori: By the way, once all the chocolate is done, we'll also reenact amongst ourselves the experience of giving and receiving chocolates.

So with that in mind, everyone, do take care to make your chocolate with love...♪

Ibara: With love?

Jun: Ah... Sorry, this part's my fault.

My only impression of Valentine's Day is from a shoujo manga I read, and well, Ohii-san took a look, too.

Seems like that made him wanna experience the whole giving and receiving chocolate thing, as well as all the heart-fluttery excitement that comes along with it.

Ibara: What "heart-fluttering excitement" are you expecting from doing this with unit members?

Jun: Well, we might at least get some kinda warm and fuzzy feeling, right? Not that I'd know ♪

Ibara: — Good grief. I've gotten myself wrapped up in something very troublesome. My hands are still quite full with Chocolat Fes-related work, you know.

Job requests have come rolling in by the dozen after our resounding success.

Nagisa: .. Then, that means Ibara's Chocolat Fes is still ongoing, right?

Hiyori: And that would mean this is the perfect time for our Venture into V-day Project, yes? Eden's Valentine's Day isn't over just yet...♪

Ibara: These are two separate matters.

Jun: … says you, but it looks to me like you're the one who's making the fanciest chocolate here, Ibara~

Nagisa: …I’m curious, what are you making? It looks like the most delicious one here. I'm interested.

Ibara: It's not just “it looks like”; I'll have you know that it actually is the most delicious one. I'm going to make the best chocolates here, appearance included.

Even though we are just making sweets, I don’t intend to lose, after all!

So everyone, please look forward to the end result…☆

Hiyori: Well, after hearing a boast like that, I simply can't wait to see how it turns out♪

Nagisa: … I agree, I'm looking forward to trying it.

Jun: Um, this project isn't supposed to be a competition...

... But well, it's just like Ibara to always crave first place in anything and everything, huh?

Jun: — Alrighty. I'm gonna give my chocolate my best shot, too, so we can all enjoy this Valentine's thing together as Eden~♪

[ ☆ ]

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[cerastes]

My current biggest hurdles are getting my AC to move how I want it to--specifically EN management and verticality. The tutorial boss felt like I was using all my energy just strafing and listening to Walter tell me to get off the ground. I did learn to be more aggressive and win, but the follow up training and missions hasn't really given me more opportunity to practice.

Second hurdle is how to better recover and avoid getting staggered myself beyond never get hit. Threading the needle between using energy to not get hit but also using it to close the distance and get in the kills/damage I need to finish a mission. Outside of AC I like mobile close-range and/or long-range play styles.

The tutorial chopper is pretty demanding for new players, so don't let it discourage you. The "best solution" to it, in the tutorial Loader-4, is to Assault Boost at it when it's just using its machine guns (ie not shooting direct rockets at you). Putting that on quotations because Hey, As Long As It Works. When Walter tells you to get off the ground, it's specifically to avoid the splash of the telegraphed rockets, not necessarily to stay on the air at all times.

Now, basically, you have to treat being off the ground as an action phase for you: You are using resources to stay afloat, and it gives you better innate evasion and maneuvering, plus any benefit that altitude differences might give you over an enemy, if you were previously level with them (keep this in mind), but of course, it comes at the cost of not being able to stay in that state forever. This is in contrast with how in For Answer, you could just perpetually fly if you built that way (and even get Quick Boost chains in for reasonably long), which I mention just in case you've heard of that and were wondering what's up with that in 6. So, in the chopper fight, for example, you only really want to leave the ground when it's shooting rockets at you, if you need it for the extra maneuvering to dodge missiles, and to attack. Being off the ground isn't an offensive phase or a defensive phase, it's an action phase: You can do more things in general, for both offensive and defensive ends. It must be treated as such.

Don't look at Quick Boosts as your Soulsborne i-frame roll or quickstep, look at Quick Boosts as, again, an action: It can be used for breakneck evasive actions when you need it to be that, but also, it can be your way in to your ideal range, whether that's pulling away or going in. Spamming QBs is going to eat your energy, and thus, your action resources. Learn to move and evade without the use of QB, and to use QBs when it's 'right' to do so.

Are you noticing a pattern here? Your resource, EN, is not a defensive tool, or an offensive tool exclusively, it's both. The tempo in Armored Core comes from knowing how to flow freely in action, using it offensively, defensively, and both simultaneously as the fight calls for it. Try to internalize that. If you see a barrage of missiles homing on to you from an angle, you could QB to avoid it, but that'll take EN, which doesn't recover as fast in the air as it does on the ground. Instead, you have to try to use your normal boosting movement to move in a way that the missiles miss, such as crossing past them as close to them as you can afford so they can't physically home in on you and hit you. Find the right range relative to your enemy that afford you being able to strafe around them in a ring without their shots hitting you. Armored Core is about finding out things about the specific fight you're currently in, and there's no universal formula for that, but there is a number of good habits that will let you find out the information you need ASAP so you can adjust to it. Am I getting hit a lot while boosting? Is this mitigated by QBing? What do I QB at and where? Does it benefit me to have an altitude difference? How much does it benefit me to be above the enemy? Things like this.

Both hurdles are tied to this, because learning your use of resources and your movement will invariably result in getting hit less or not in any significant amount of times that you'll get ACS broken. "Threading the needle between using energy to not get hit but also using it to close the distance and get in the kills/damage I need to finish a mission" this is pretty much what you have to learn, but also, always keep in mind that your enemy plays by the same rules as you do: They have reload times, they have limited actions, they have to consider the exact same things you need to consider, and are punished for the same failings. Knowing when to use your EN to focus on evasion or for going in is exactly what you should be trying to learn, and it becomes easier when you realize you DON'T need to be QBing all the time, just regular, smart movement and changes in altitude are enough most of the time. QBs eat your energy fiercely.

To get a handle of movement and economy of action, I recommend these loadouts:

With Weapon Bay: Right hand Assault Rifle, Linear Rifle, or Machine Gun, right shoulder missiles launcher/Left hand Shotgun or Machine Gun, left shoulder melee weapon of your choice

Without Weapon Bay: All the same but decide whether you want to keep the left hand firearm or melee weapon, then left shoulder another Missile Launcher or Grenade Cannon.

Simple but effective loadouts that give you close range agency, aren't prohibitively expensive so you can stay mobile, and can dive in and bail out while staying relevant in offensive terms. This may seem a lot at once, but take it at your own speed and once it clicks, trust you me that it'll click.