#just gotta take it a day at a time rn
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
i think i’m gonna write more in-depth lore posts for the deities of dorverold, maybe even exploring their respective “ courts ” and whatnot; i want to really flesh all of them out and build on the sort of followers they probably have, their influence, domains, etc., so!!
#mal and orrosta have to wait bc they weren’t creation deities in that they didn’t help shape the initial earth#they came later so they’ll later be grouped with other minor deities who rose to prominence#although i’m wondering if mal should be considered part of the original group? like saying he helped create time and gave day and night#a beginning and end and gifted humans the ability to recall precious memories stuff like that#we’ll see — i’ll think more on it later!#this is a good starting place since there’s a lot to think about :’ )#also sorry i haven’t been here!! it’s been a bad brain day ;; just haven’t felt motivated to do much other than play pokemon tbh#i hope everyone’s enjoying their day though!! and i’ll try to get back into things soon as i can!#just gotta take it a day at a time rn#get ready to ramble | ooc
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
everybody that's desperate to dunk on dubas is missing the compelling point of the whole dubas thing.... him actually wanting to be here, but being forced out because of a misstep... watching a team he literally had a hand in building come together for each other like this and add to his own problems... having to logically be in it with the pens but. you can't just turn your feelings off about this team that you raised and that raised you..... like it's devastating and delicious
#leafs lb#like im not reveling in it.. idk how ppl hate him....#he was so sincere when talking abt his family and needing time away#more control prob would make parts of his job less stressful#leafs arent playing the way they are and arent constructed the way they are rn bc of treliving lol. its dubas#all the guys he loved and had faith in and its gotta be the hardest fucking thing to watch#while taking on his own herculean task of trying to give the pens core some final glory days like.#all those emotions dont just go away.......#i think ppl are MISSING OUT. ON THE ANGST AND DEVASTATION AND PAIN AND BEAUTY#kyle dubas#anyway.#my thoghjdfsk on that.#everyones just desperate to show theyve ~ gotten over him and never needed him#like as if it was his own entire fault hes not here.. when its not lol
114 notes
·
View notes
Text
Me, earlier: I'm not having the best day. Cant wait to go home later after my other job. :)
Me, rn: oh today is like....a SHIT shit day.
#silly talks#oh im just.....i want off this planet 😭😭😭#im lit on a ride rn and want OFF 😭😭😭#i need this day OVER#why my part time job gotta jack it up to the worst day ever??? 😭😭😭😭😭😭#me earlier: i dont need to post abt my day#me rn now: low key cry for help 😭😭😭#but srry for the posts stopping i need to add to the queue again#but i need to like......take a break after today 😭😭😭😭#on mobile
13 notes
·
View notes
Text
THE EYHM COLLECTION GROWS!!!! managed to make some space without having to move too much so they can all be together!!
(i made the smaller ones into stickers bc i'm running out of picture frames!! hope that's ok!)




THANK YOU SO MUCH EVERYONE WHO'S GIFTED THESE TO ME THOUGH!!! I'M CALLING ALL OF YOU OUT HERE BECAUSE I LOVE YOU!! ❤❤❤❤❤
*sharp inhale* @eskariolis-con-salsa @oddpizza @woobab @the-little-knight @moon9931 @misdreavusplush @noodletime @witch-tower-au !!!!!!!
hope you all have a good holiday season!! love you all! *MWAH*
#don't worry about the fish tanks they'll keep the kitties company! there's literally almost nowhere else good to put these lmao#but!! i think they look good there at least!! AND IN GENERAL THEY ALL LOOK SO GOOD THANK YOU#BUT NOW AFTER THIS I REALLY NEED TO FIND MORE SPOTS IF I GET MORE EYHMS BECAUSE THERE'S NO SPACE LEFT THERE!#....maybe i can move some of the pokemon posters i have by my bed lol. they're just kinda. there rn.#but yeah!! i never expected people to like this cat this much and i'm kinda freaking out!!! but thank you again so much!!#i'll say it 1000 times if i have to!!!!!!#eyhm stuff#gift eyhms#basically ALL of the gift eyhms i've gotten lmao. there's a couple that're in progress but they'll hopefully join the others soon-ish!#quick side ramble! i've got a couple more drawing things planned this year but they might take a couple days because Chrimbo and all!#but there's a couple pizza tower things/gifts and. maybe finally my About Me post? gotta figure out how i'm gonna make that heh#OK I'VE BEEN TALKING TOO LONG SORRY BUT I'M JUST SO HAPPY ABOUT THESE AAAHHHHHHH
60 notes
·
View notes
Text
me trying to hype myself up to posting online again despite The Horror
#so turned out taking a break was both needed and the worst thing I could have done#having Anything to do day to day was the one thing keeping my brain from engaging nuclear meltdown lol#was trying to tell myself if the election went well maybe there'd be a chance for someone like me and it'd be worth trying again#but uhh no need to explain the flaws in that logic lmao#still stuck in the same place with no where else to go#and like#the more I learn about the scale of history the more I understand that relief won't really come until long after I've died#not at a scale needing to overcome the sheer ocean of grief and blood my country is built on and continues to feed year by year#have to live with it now somehow#its not liberating to acknowledge#but there's no such thing as miracles so I guess I'll stop hoping for better#that kind of thing has to be built by hand#really feelin that pingu rn#anyway time to stop whining I gotta start planning to post art or something#might need a second blog for my other non-nature-y artwork#trying to figure out how to make things manageable#maybe will make something silly just to break the ice#rompopolo calls
14 notes
·
View notes
Text
awawawawawawa
#bunny rambles#i was “cleared” to go back to work yesterday but she told me i could use the rest of the time also if i wanted/needed#and im using it. but the little corporateanxietybot who lives in my head and tries to make me be a Good Worker[tm] is SCREAMING HER HEAD OFF#cause she thinks my boss/Dad is gonna scream at and hit her for being Lazy#this is a trauma post also um. didnt expect to name her rn but she's screaming and i cant scream back cause she sounds like alarms and those#scare crustywhitedog so i have to calm that one so i don't meltdown#my wife submitted the RTW date for me so like. its okay im actually taking the time and ik this is necessary also bc. it is clearly unwell#that its freaking out because it's gotten a more than a 2 day break for the first time in a year#ik corporateanxietybot has protected me in some ways but. i gotta kill her so bad. maybe H can help me reformat her somehow .....#i also hate her is the thing. she cant hear me rn bc she's just looping in circles alarming but anyway. i hate her. like Me. she's so#capitalismcorebootlicker and i hate that about her and i hate that she exists and i hate that she exists bc my dad raised me to be an#Employee instead of a person 🙃🙃🙃🙃#im not elaborating or explaining any of this. this is a diary entry now#i wish i could click her to kill her like the drones in hardcoded lmao it'd be so much easier. ik she like. lives in the work mode mask as#well which is also HARD bc if im not actively thinking Of work or At work she's nonexistent#but shes so LOUD 🙃🙃 like shut up. we're not gonna explode n die from taking an extra week off you're being dramatic our boss isnt Dad#like he LITERALLY isn't Dad. not even close. he's like the most docile man in the world come on ik they're around the same age and both hve#held authority over u but boss checking in wasnt a trap ur not ab to get caught doing wrong ur fiiiiIIIIIIINE#(also corporateanxietybot is not an adult. she's 15 and terrified but she integrated to my work mask which is the problem cause she makes me#a “phenomenal employee” and also makes me work myself sick when she is given the reigns. little devil on my shoulder except the capitalist#system we live under treats her as a positive thing so she gets positive reinforcement at work which only makes her more anxious 😭 i gotta#talk to H about this next Friday huh. also wow. parts work has made it a lot easier for me to acknowledge these behaviors so i can confront#them easier. weird. strange even. so many parts have gotten names this past month n im realizing also why its been so hard to process stuff#but it also has made me kinder to myself. anyway she turned off (her batteries are low since she's been home for a month too) so im gonna#clean myself up and get some food in me and then get some cleaning done
7 notes
·
View notes
Text
y’all i’m feeling overwhelmed and icky tonight, so i’m thinking i’m just!! gonna let myself relax until sunday. i think i’ve been putting way more pressure on myself than i should be — i should not feel so guilty over a hobby with people who understand i have a life outside of tumblr. i’ll likely still lurk and try to answer more messages, but don’t expect me to actively write till sunday. i need to take a lil breath uvu
#my personal life is honestly contributing to this a bit but i feel i have so little time throughout the week to write#that i feel really guilty about it even though it really can’t be helped#sunday is the best day for me to write bc i don’t have any obligations but it’s just!! frustrating rn#but i need to breathe and take a lil step back and do some other things i enjoy and i’ll be fine#i just gotta get it together uvu#ilu all though and pls remember to take breaks — don’t be like me and put pressure on yourself! just have fun!!#get ready to ramble | ooc#tw negative
11 notes
·
View notes
Text
Bought a stupid suit thing. Disgustang.
#speculation nation#i got it on sale but it was still kinda expensive. ughhhh#hates every part of that. it's so stiff and uncomfortable and unnatural feeling.#but business professional is the recommended attire... so to that i went...#felt bad staying so close to close but the employees were nice about it at least. and i still got out b4 they closed (barely)#i wanted to go shopping earlier today. in between class and orchestra. but allegedly attendance is required in the lab.#so i went. didnt really feel like attendance was taken. but i still went.#still gotta finish prepping my resume but i dont think itll take Too long... i got a template to follow#from my web coding class actually. bc we just happen to have a resume building assignment this week.#so by working on my resume im working on the lab!! yay!!!#except im not doing the lab resume rn. just the normal resume. the template is still helpful tho.#also need to do a bit of research into the companies that are there and the interview style thingie#GOD this is going to be a whole hassle. i dont wanna wrinkle my stupid suit so i shouldnt stuff it in a bag.#and i dont wanna BIKE in the stupid suit. so im thinking of driving up to campus. forking over the money for guest parking#do the stupid career fair then drive back home to change and then go back up to campus on bus or bike in time for bowling#hopefully. we hope. nonzero chance of having to miss bowling and web coding classes tho. depending on how long i spend at this thing.#ultimately career bullshit is more important than one day of bowling so like. whatever.#but i still want a reward for sucking it up and going to the stupid career fair anyways. even tho i Really dont want to.#im already planning on skipping my first class. he made it sound like it would be fine + expected. so we can go to the career fair.#and that opens up a good amount of time so. doing that. and then hoping i can make it to bowling class...#it's funny to imagine if i didnt have time to go back home to change. me showing up to bowling in a suit.#im not doing that tho. this shit was too expensive to risk it doing physical activity.#BLARGH i am so supremely grumpy going to this thing. i dont want to. at all. i hate all this Professional Attire bullshit.#but i need to... and i already went thru the hassle of getting the damn suit... might as well just go.#i will simply pout and grumble the whole way. until tomorrow where it'll be full social smiles and whatever the fuck.#need to get enough sleep to make talking easier. no time for any fun stuff tonight.#need to find my damn. razor. bc i need to shave my little mustache thing probably. for 'professionalism'. ugh.#kicking and screaming this whole way. man i dont think i even own an ironing board. gonna have to hang the shit up and hope for the best#longest sigh imaginable... i just wanna write....... or play video games...... wahhhh#at least itll be over tomorrow. but then i will have to do presentation stuff for thursday. ughhhhhh
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
random question, do yall have any gender/sexuality headcanons for skyblock npcs? :]
#my inbox is open if you would like to share with the class#only a handful of you play the game but more than a handful of you know about it so like. surely there's something right#i have many but i wanna hear other takes. perfectly fine to contradict my own btw im curious!#im feeling particularly prideful tonight and it is 100% bc i've just been laying around sick thinking abt the month#got a lot on my mind. wanted to doodle earlier but dont feel super great#definitely better but not great. dont wanna get locked into A Task and not move for a couple hours kjhfgk#so i've just been scrolling and occasionally doing something else. like typing rn i am typing wahoo#gotta cancel my dentist appointment... AGAIN >:(#these cavities are gonna fucking rot man 😭#that's twice i've gotten sick the day before an appointment. but this time it has a fever so it's Real Sickness#last time it was just allergies#chat
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
i hate that this website has location based ads now like it's one thing to promote the local grocery store chain to me but i am seeing ads for my workplace now :/
#stop it......#i don't want to go back but this is the last sick day i can reasonably take#i probably should've gone back today but i told them when i was still feeling worse that i wasn't coming in.......#ohhhh i dread going in tomorrow so much. i don't even dislike this job i just hate being somewhere everyday#each day feeling its meaninglessness...... my meaninglessness in the space.......... the repetition and redundancy#selling people who don't need to be there things that they don't need#standing all day long just fucking bored#hoping that enough has happened since i've been gone that people can fill me in#ugggh because it's soooo boring but stressful to have to generate conversation with the same people every day#when nothing new ever happens#and i get sick of everybody even the people that i like and i don't really think anybody likes me that much either#i guess i felt this when i worked there part time but because i only had to be there part time it wasn't this constant gnawing feeling#and they didn't have me in the shop all the time....... this schedule is fucking killing me#i walk there i stand all day and i walk home#that's one of the reasons i haven't come back in yet - i was so dizzy and nauseous that the idea of standing all day was like.#i obviously can't fucking do that even if i would otherwise feel well enough to come in#if i had a sitting job then it wouldn't matter if i was a little dizzy#but getting back and forth to work and then standing for 8 hours. even when i'm feeling well it's kind of a lot#idk i guess i'm pretty unhappy with this job and where i am in life etc but i can't quit rn because what else would i do#there's literally job of this type that is going to pay as well and have good benefits#and i'm not qualified yet for the type of work i hope to do in the future#so i just gotta wait it out but it feels like. endless.#sigh anyway i'm just lazy lol#all this is to say. stop putting ads for my workplace on my dash lol i don't need to see all that
11 notes
·
View notes
Text
I snapped today at work, and by snapped I mean I politely commented on a help desk ticket by summing up an mess of an (type of) issue that's come up for at least the fourth time in the 2+ months I've been managing user accounts, and asked the person responsible to fix it (himself for once) because last time I fixed his mess-up it took me two whole days to work out the details with at least four other colleagues from different departments and I really don't want to do it again. there's other shit that needs doing, I've been working 10+ hour days for most of this week already, so I need to cut down not add on more.
(good thing tho - at least we managed to fix the issue where the dataset of a newer employee got mixed up with another one of the same name and therefore wasn't able to apply for any of the access/accounts she needed. technically not entirely my area but it does impact us not being allowed to create an account for her so I figured I might as well track that issue down. took three days and at least three other people, but hey - it should all work out now. yay for that)
#been feeling anxious af ever since bc it's the first time I've been this firm in a reply and idk how they'll take it#there's underlying issues in inter-departmental communication that need fixing that cause these issues to happen again and again#but my boss is on parental leave and his substitute is sick not that she cares or is up for doing her job where communication is concerned#so there's no real sense in addressing that rn esp by me who's only been there since June. but it does frustrate me a lot#anyway. I'm sure I'll get over this too. but yeah.. ppl not thinking things through for the two mins it takes to create an account#or the twenty seconds it takes to check if one already exists before creating a new one#or the minute it takes to check if folks still have an active contract past their time working in your department before deleting an accoun#just jfc. put in a smidge of effort and five mins total and save the rest of us from spending half a day to fix your mistake#oh well. if I get a pissy response I'll just blame it on being new as an intern and being too motivated and idealistic I guess#god forbid I expect people to do their jobs thoroughly or with at least a singular thought..#anyway. I feel like I'm allowed to be grumpy abt this since we are the folks who end up having to fix this shit#and by we I mean pretty much mostly me at this point bc one colleague is sick atm. my boss barely has time for this and is on leave#and my other colleague only works half time so I'm the one who's been handling most of these over the past month or so#which.. is still insane considering how I'm a goddamn intern who shouldn't even have admin rights tbh#but without them I couldn't do anything at all lol so here I am. nice that they trust and believe in me I suppose#that's why I try to do my best. (who am I kidding that's always the case anyway)#but yeah. definitely a 50% staff support job and only 50% of the other important things that need doing rn it's more like 90/10#and it's funny how I still dread my two hours of hotline. but every time the line is too busy I still jump in#we are also only 6 people atm out of 10 and three of us are still in training. and one of the trained folks had to come back in mid time of#next week we'll likely be 4#depending on if our substitute boss lady is back.. not that I'd look forward to it. she's a mess and she's been horrible to deal with latel#sure. she's stressed. but she's either snapping at me when I ask abt shit I can't know yet or she's ignoring me. great basis for team work.#so honestly I'd rather she not return on Monday. esp not if she's gonna spread her germs everywhere#but now sleep. sorry for the rant. it's certainly been quite the month since I returned from my own wisdom tooth rated sick leave..#gotta be up again in 6.5 hrs so I can be at work at 6 to let the electrician in. I'm gonna sleep so hard over the weekend I stg#a day in the life of..
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
whateverrrrrrr……. bored in the house and i’m in the house bored rn
#gotta take a shower bc i smell bc i have avoided deodorant all day bc the rash is still here and i aggravated it yesterday#and only just start getting a little bit better with hydrocortisone cream it’s crazy how stuff that’s meant to help u will help..#anyone up feeling weird and unfortunate rn. just an odd time#abby talks#whiplash posts perhaps. who gaf
5 notes
·
View notes
Text
Did driving practice today. Actually did parallel parking practice this time, even tho I really didn't want to still. Finally got it into my head that I can maybe do this.
SO......
I have scheduled my driving test. For November 13th, 3 weeks from today.
#speculation nation#IM SO NERVOUSSSSS but i need to do it. i need to. worst case scenario i fail and have to try again another day.#i was actually gonna try to schedule for a week from today but they were full up for the next 2 weeks.#so. 3 weeks! my therapist is gonna be happy for me when i tell her haha#this is. something ive been avoiding for over 10 years now. but i decided at the start of this year that This would be my year.#Year Of Unfuck My Life. and im finally doing it. im going to finally get my license.#it's so. huge actually. a similar level of Holy Shit factor as me graduating.#which seems like an uneven comparison but honestly ive just been so so so scared of this driving test#an insurmountable obstacle bc i was stuck at school away from family to help me practice etc etc#very tied up with me being stuck at school for so long actually. the neverending purgatory of being Stuck In Place.#but my cousin lives closer to me now and hes been helping me out. and i am so very grateful.#augh augh augh augh. life is so busy and it feels like everything is happening at once AAAAAAAAAAAA#but im taking it all in stride. i am. oh god i might have to just practice and then take my audition video all on the same day.#bc i am too tired to deal with it rn and i have an exam tomorrow so idk if i can practice then. also i have to clean.#i will make it work. i will make something work. for the love of fucking god i will make it work.#no time to write barely any time to relax but thats okay i am Go Go Going and trying to keep enough time to sleep#(prior few nights being the..exception lol.)#i certainly wouldnt want to live this way for too long. but just a few more months. i can do it.#next semester hopefully wont be as busy. i'll have 3 hard classes but if im lucky they wont even have much homework.#i can do it. i can get through it. i will get my license in 3 weeks (manifesting) and i will get my own car.#i will find a new apartment to live in. i will Hopefully find a job.#within a year my life is going to be much much different.#my life is Already much much different than it was just a year ago. tho this year has been more... metamorphosis.#in a year's time. i will be 28 years old. and the pieces will Finally be falling into place (hopefully!!!!!)#for now. god i need to rest. will probably go to sleep early tonight. need to be rested for my exam tomorrow.#first tho i gotta shower and feed both me and the cats. yes.
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
staring at the Newegg order page like

#pidge speaks#pls ship#pls ship now#i am begging you to ship#legit going insane rn i have not been this impatient for something in a long time PLS#i know im being insane#ordered the pc on the 31st but it counts it as the first bc i did it later in the evening/night???#1-2 business days to process except it counted as a preorder so i dont think it started actually processing until yesterday#so 1-2 days starting now??? ig???#and then it will take 3-5 to ship#but i am going absolutely bonkers rn#still gotta buy the monitor and keyboard#know what kind of keyboard i want at least#wonder if i can go ahead and choose the monitor/keyboard and like have the shipped to my local bb and put them on hold or smthn#then i can just swing in and pick them up when the pc gets here#god i still need to buy the fn game#so thats another 60 bucks on top of everything else#hhhhhhhhhhhh#screaming crying throwing up
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
when will my writing motivation return from the war 😭
#please i just wanna post the next chapter#or at the very least start a oneshot or do literally anything#ive been more tired than usual and i dont like that#im ALWAYS so so tired#sometimes YEAH its because im up til 3 or even 4#but ive also slept 9 hours. 12 hours. and yet ill STILL feel so tired#im too tired to do the things i want to do#and then i feel like ive just wasted my whole day :(((#how many times these past few weeks have i said im gonna get this chapter done huh? and it is NOT done#i love creating and writing but it takes so much energy sometimes :((( and i just dont have it :(((#i feel bad/down -> writing would help me feel better -> too tired/unmotivated to write -> doesnt write -> keeps feeling bad#rinse and repeat lmao#sometimes being nice to urself and waiting for the motivation doesnt work#sometimes u gotta sit at ur desk with a massive mug of coffee and say ''i will WRITE if its the last thing i fucking do''#screw quality its time to write WORDS#anyway. im making myself coffee rn. i will get through this dammit#summer post
7 notes
·
View notes
Text
as I lie in bed, 4am and the hopes to fix my sleep schedule even a lil bit, I can't help but feel proud of my gamin today. I explored more of the open world it provides, i set myself for some great things (hopefully🤞) in the future but most importantly? I had fun
I have more thoughts but i would rather not dwell on negativity, somethin I've been strugglin with lately if I'm bein honest (ꏿ﹏ꏿ;) but main thing is I'm tryin to be happier with all the complex emotions i got swirlin abt in my silly skull an makin my chest feel cold an dizzy. It ain't a good feelin but if it's wantin to stay i outta make it live by my rules ᕙ( : ˘ ∧ ˘ : )ᕗ
I wanna be happier an the only things stoppin me rn is.. well myself, time an the fact I need to talk to someone special to me but that's a lil tricky rn
#im just ramblin dont mind me#altho if ya wanna talk with me abt anythin rlly I'd like that#long as youre understandin of the fact I'm fixin to sleep here shortly lol#might delete this later I haven't decided yet#if y'all wanted to drop some nice msgs‚ encouragement or the like I'd rlly like that but obvs only if ya want an can spare the kind words#i know those are in short supply lately an i dont mean to make anyone feel like they gotta take on more negativity or unhappiness by sayin#anythin to a stranger on the Internet#i hope you readin this has a better day‚ a better time than what youre goin thru rn
5 notes
·
View notes