#just for this stupid joke

[inkskinned]

she's singing in another room and my dog is asleep at my feet. my grandma asked me why i haven't found a man yet and i laughed. oh, you know. i like my house clean.

my girlfriend is also my man is also "my partner" if i'm in a professional setting. yesterday we went to a ren faire and a man mimed at me - you're together? and at my delighted nod, his baffled, you're gay? made me laugh. a woman with rainbow hair said i love the two of you together. you're both so beautiful it's absurd.

my dad introduced my partner as my "..... friend. or whatever" the other day. he knows we're dating. in the same way, i was never able to get my sister's husband to stop saying that's gay like it's 2008. he still uses the word fa***t, and my sister's defense of him has always been well, he's just kidding.

my lover and i dance to old music in a tiny kitchen. we judge new music together and take food critique very seriously. we watch love is blind before we fall asleep and agree that if they had a queer season, it would be bloody but also make for excellent tv. of fucking course queer people would know someone for only 2 weeks and agree to get married. what are you saying.

at a bar with friends, a man puts his hand on my wrist. got a boyfriend? and yes, i do have a boyfriend, she's amazing. i am texting her while i wander around a gas station named after geese. i am visiting a swing state for a wedding. in the candy aisle i overhear: she's actually like a lesbian it's disgusting. two teenage girls with packaged sandwiches in their hands, giggling. no literally, like. i'm not, like. okay with her being there while we're all, like, naked and changing.

my girlfriend and i tailgate, drink gin and cider out of cups. from the frat group beside us, a man corrects himself with one of his friends: bro, i mean, nonbinary entity, and it makes everyone around him laugh, myself included. he razzes his friend the same way i would have killed for at 19 years old - like nothing happened, he continues: you apply sunscreen like an alien. he does a little sassy (and fairly accurate) dance interpretation of the motion. his friend is laughing so hard they're crying.

i am lucky, i live in a safe neighborhood in a safe state. my masc passenger princess comes up from DC. i drive her for an hour to where all the leaves are a violent arrangement of color. we walk along the trails, letting autumn into our blood. in this part of the state, there's a lot of pickup trucks and trump signs. when we chastely kiss before getting into the car, i accidentally make eye contact with a woman holding her child's wrist. she looks disgusted. she looks fucking pissed.

two hours later my girl and i are eating dinner on a patio, soaking in the last warmth of new england sun before the chill of winter sets in. we are giggling and trying to talk through plastic vampire teeth. at another table, i see a young woman sit up straighter. i watch her watch us. she blushes and takes her partner's hand from across the table. shy, like the taste of evening has just become something deeper.

it's worth it for this moment, i think. my lover is still humming the same song she's been singing for four days straight and i don't want to kill her for it. her guitar is beside my bed. her toothbrush is in my bathroom. in a few moments i will make us lunch. we are lucky enough to have found each other. it is lucky enough to be in love.

[marypsue]

Keep seeing that post where OP starts like 'Thinking about...grieving the undead' and then adds on about like. Real life situations where people have not died but have left your life and you would have reason to grieve them.

All respect, that's an important concept, but that is not what I am thinking about when I read 'grieving the undead'.

[chimchiri]

gideon & harrow OR rd and sf as cowboys please please please

It's the cowgirl necro and her gunslinger cav! Who is so damn extra she's got three guns: one left, one right, and one in pole position! (She swears the ladies love it!)

[flagellant]

yeah we might be brothers in christ but so were cain and abel so shut the fuck up before i decide to find a rock about it

[chloesimaginationthings]

FNAF movie Mike thinks Michael is dumb as hell

[shikisei]

ok stupid question my bad

[thereallycoolmonsterithoughtup]

kabru and mithrun's fun succubus adventure

[umblrspectrum]

part 4 of a lot funnier in my head than on paper

[the-midnight-sugar1]

I don’t think he hears genuine laughter very often

[inkskinned]

having good & true friends will literally save and protect you in a million unfathomable ways. like okay we have written so many times about lovers. but the way a platonic friend laughs and cries with you. the way they hold your hand at 14 years old and at 34. the way they keep a little silver tie to you, touching base over and over and over. how you can go years without talking, only to re-meet and discover: oh shit! you're still cool!

there are people who have been in my life for more than half of it, and i have loved every version of them. do you know how fucking beautiful that is. yeah love will save the world. but the way friends love you is gonna save the you.

[lttleghost]

I've complained about this meme before but I feel like I can more precisely describe why it pisses me off now, cause like yeah yeah it's silly it doesn't matter all that much but like... the joke of it is basically just "haha Jesse stupid and messes stuff up Walt knows about" without actually... thinking about Walt or Jesse's characters and what they're actually knowledgeable about nor about the actual contexts of all trainwrecks that these two get into and how almost every single time it's WALT who had the more reasonable option to avoid it

like okay so we see Jesse play video games, we see even more game cases scattered around his house and apartment, my girl is a gamer, and there is no such evidence with Walt. if one of these characters knows a ton about minecraft and the other doesn't, the knowledgeable one is gonna be Jesse - but Walt hates not being in control, he likes to boss around others and he thinks he knows better than others, and especially thinks he knows better than Jesse, and Jesse has shit self esteem and is easily manipulated and caves to what Walt wants him to do most of the time after awhile. realistically this situation would go something along the lines of Jesse trying to tell Walt how to make a cobblestone generator, Walt saying that it makes no sense for some reason or another and telling Jesse to do it a different way, and then acting like it's Jesse's fault that it didn't work when Jesse goes and does it like Walt told him to, kinda like how Jesse tells Walt that doing certain things and getting involved with certain people as drug dealers isn't a good idea and Walt tells him to do something anyway and it goes badly for both of them

or even if we wanted to assume that Walt IS the one with the minecraft knowledge, any time past literally episode one Jesse tends to ask questions when he doesn't fully understand something, and Walt often just dismisses the question, Jesse still tries to do whatever he's supposed to with his limited knowledge but fails, in such examples as "why won't fluoric acid melt this flimsy plastic" so a different route for a more accurate meme is that Walt tells Jesse how to make the cobblestone generator, something about the process doesn't make sense to Jesse, he asks a clarifying question, Walt's answer is basically "fuck you", Jesse still tries his goddamn best even if he fails and Walt blames it on Jesse over considering the idea that refusing to answer Jesse's clarifying question was the actual problem

[locusfandomtime]

The maths fandom is wild. “Real” and “imaginary” numbers? I think you mean canon and non-canon. You guys seriously go “this is my number oc his name is i and he is the square root of -1” when in numbers canon lore it’s actually impossible to square root a negative but sure whatever. “Complex numbers”? I think you mean a character x oc ship. “f(x) = 3x - 5”? That is self-insert fanfiction.

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Hello Madam. Sorry Madam.

[First] Prev <–-> Next

[lucabyte]

pros and cons

[p0th]

[noodles-and-tea]

👀