#just been playing like 2-3 days per real day

[aliceundrground]

Having fun with cozy grove but wish I could actually just name my animals for real? Also wish it wasn't irl time based but thats what switch settings are for I guess lmao

[starsinthesky5]

you belong with me IV part 1 || joe burrow x reader

description: you and joe attend your sister's wedding together and relish the blissfulness that a new relationship brings

a/n: whew this one is longggg. and this is after splitting it up so the original version was going to be even longer 😭 anyway, hope you all enjoy it ;) this also features a flashback requested by @joeys-babe! ilysm girly💕 also, there may be a few faint fearless album references here and there (told you that these two reminded me of that album's love songs)

part 2 will be out next week!

word count: 19 k

warnings: smut, language, slight angst? 

you belong with me masterlist (parts 1-3 located here)

—————————————————————

January 3rd

You finished applying the last bit of lip gloss to your lips before stepping back from the mirror, straightening out the strappy-silky blush pink dress that hugged your body in all the best ways possible and the high slit showing just enough leg. Your hair was curled and clipped back with two pieces hanging in the front and your gold jewelry glistened in the warm light of the bathroom, specifically the ring on your left hand which was a permanent & constant reminder of the person in your life that meant the most to you. 

“Y/N, you look amazing,” your sister said from behind you, interrupting your daze.

You turned around, your sister standing behind you in her robe, her hair done up in her ‘wedding look’, with two glasses of champagne in her hand. 

“Thanks, Kay,” you smiled as you walked over to her, grabbing the champagne glass she was offering you and taking a good sip to hopefully take the edge off and cool down your brain that was operating at 100 miles per hour because of the fact that it was Wedding Day.

“I see you went with gold jewelry per my suggestion,” she gloated as she looked at your earrings, your necklace, the bracelets on your wrist, her eyes stopping at the ring on your left hand (which was the only ring you were wearing). 

“Hm, that’s new,” she said as she grabbed your hand and pulled it up to her face. You froze as she examined the ring, the ring Joe had given to you in December. 

“Yeah. I, um, got it at an antique shop a few weeks ago,” you lied as you took another sip of champagne. 

“Really? It looks so authentic. I’ve never seen such real-looking fake diamonds and jewels,” she said as she studied the ring. 

Before she could ask any other questions and you blabbed about who the ring was actually from, you quickly changed the topic. “Shouldn’t you be getting your makeup done right now?” you asked as you looked over at the clock. 

“She’s almost done with Veronica and then I’ll go out,” she smiled as she let go of your hand and reached up to tuck in a flyaway hair on the top of your head. 

“Thanks,” you nodded as you started to take another sip of your champagne. 

“Of course,” she nodded. “I have to make sure you look perfect for Joe,”. 

You nearly choked on your drink, your eyes widening in shock as your brain registered what your sister was suggesting. 

You hadn’t told your family about the two of you yet, you were practically a secret. You wanted to tell everyone, but the two of you also wanted to enjoy this for a little bit without it being out in the world. But you were also playing a risky game, one tiny slip-up from you and your sister would be cracking the case she had been trying to break open for years.

“W- What?” you coughed.

“Relax, Y/N,” she said while rubbing your arm. “I was just messing with you,”.

“R- Right,” you coughed again. 

“But you did bring him as your date, no surprise there though,” she smirked, your eyes rolling at her relentless attitude. “Just like how he brought you with him to that Christmas party last month. You sure you don’t have anything to tell me,” she warily asked you. 

“Nope,” you voiced, remaining calm and collected so that you wouldn’t give it away. 

“God, when are you going to make a move? You guys aren’t getting any younger,” she asked, playfully shoving your shoulder.

Little did she know, you already did. You already made a lot of moves.  

“Kay, we’re just friends. I’ve told you that many many many times,” you lied, attempting to hide the growing blush on your cheeks by walking out of the bathroom, Kaylee following you back into the bridal suite. 

“Actions speak louder than words,” she teased as she walked over to the now-empty makeup station and sat down on the comfy chair. 

You shook your head while turning around and walking over to the dining table, walking past the other bridesmaids who were trying on different shoes to pair with their dresses.

“I can’t believe Joe Burrow is here,” you overheard your sister's friend Veronica say to the other girls. 

Your heart skipped a beat when you overheard his name being mentioned, your face heating up at the nature of the conversation.

“Shhh, he’s Y/N’s date,” her other friend Lacy said as she glanced over at you.

“So? From what I’ve heard they’re just good friends and if she’s not going to go for it, then who’s stopping me?” Veronica laughed. “I mean, have you seen Joe? Give me 5 minutes with him alone and he’ll be stuck to my side,”. 

“Yeah, but that’s still her best friend and she brought him as her date. Besides, don’t you ever see the stuff online about how none of his girls seem to stick around? And then don’t you see the stuff online about how people think Y/N and him have something going on which is why he doesn’t really have a girlfriend,” Lacy attempted to whisper but was doing terribly. 

“Who cares? If she really likes him, she’s doing a terrible job at showing it because as far as I see, he’s still on the market,” Veronica said with a grin. 

You rolled your eyes again because of how childish it all sounded. You wanted to say something to them, defending your relationship and getting them to back off but how could you defend a relationship that people didn’t even know was a relationship yet? You felt like a teenager, hiding her first boyfriend from her family and friends and sneaking around like you had something scandalous to hide.

“Whatever,” you whispered as you placed your champagne glass down on the dining table. You reached for a chocolate cupcake but were interrupted by a knock at the front door, nobody noticed but you. 

“I got it,” you said aloud to everyone, nobody listening as your sister was wrapped up in a conversation with the makeup artist, and the other girls were busy trying on their shoes and talking about your boyfriend. “Okay,” you sighed as you walked over to the door of the suite. 

You opened the door, your eyes staring at the shoes of the person standing in front of you, slowly moving up their body as you met their face. 

“You look gorgeous,” Joe said, a cheeky grin on his face as he stuffed his hands in his pants pockets, his eyes moving from your toned legs, to your perfect hips, and up to your beautiful face.  

“Joe,” you gasped as you stepped out into the hallway with him, closing the door behind you. “What’re you doing up here,” you asked him as you took in how handsome he looked in his suit, the urge to pull him into one of the rooms by his tie incredibly strong. 

“I came to see my stunning girlfriend,” he smiled as he backed you up to the wall. 

You blushed when you felt his hand brush against your waist, “If Kaylee catches us out here-,”.

“We’ll be fine,” he said as he grabbed your hand, toying with the ring on your finger. “I just wanted to see you for a few minutes before the ceremony,”.

“Oh yeah?” you beamed as you ran your hands up his suit jacket to his broad shoulders. 

“How’s it going in there? You guys at each other's throats yet?” he asked, knowing how you felt about some of your sister's friends. 

“Well, Veronica was going on about how she apparently needs 5 minutes alone with you to get you stuck to her side,” you said, rolling your eyes as Joe’s mouth dropped. 

“No way,” he said.

“Yes, way. Future Mrs. Burrow is probably in there talking about baby names right now,” you teased, Joe clearly not liking the joke as he wasn’t laughing like you were. 

“Please, the real future Mrs. Burrow is standing right in front of me,” he said, giving your waist a gentle squeeze as he gazed deeply into your eyes. You felt your heartbeat pick up, his touch sending shivers throughout your body much like the words that came out of his mouth. 

“It doesn’t bother me. She’ll figure it out at some point,” you smiled confidently.

“As much as I hate other girls talking about me like that and how much I’d love for you to shut them up, I like that we’re just enjoying this for now without having it out in front of everyone,” Joe nodded, referring to enjoying each other’s company without having everyone know you were officially a couple. 

“Me too,” you smiled. “By the way, you look amazing,” you said as you gave him another once-over. “I need to see you in more suits,”. 

“No, you look amazing. This dress is reallyyyy doing something to me,” he said as he moved his hands to your lower back, feeling the strappy design that was exposing a little too much of your bare back for his liking. “You look stunning with it on,”.

“If you play your cards right tonight, I might even let you take it off,” you teased as you threaded your fingers through his hair, your head leaning against the wall. 

“I’ll be sure to be on my best behavior then,” he mumbled as he slowly leaned in for a kiss, you moved your head off the wall and crashed your lips against his, his hands pulling your body closer to his as you meet for a fiery kiss. His touch sent electric jolts throughout your body as his hand went from your back to your ass.

“If we were alone right now,” he said between kisses. 

“I know,” you panted as you pulled him back to your lips, your arms looping around his neck and pulling him closer. 

The feeling of his lips against yours was sending you into a frenzy, not a single coherent thought in your mind as you melted under his electrifying touch. You felt his lips move down, pressing kisses from your chin down to your neck and his hands sliding across the silky fabric of your dress. 

“Joe,” you whispered as you grabbed his hair and moved him back to your lips.

“Mm, I can’t get enough of you,” he said between kisses. 

A few heated seconds later, you heard the doorknob make a few clicking noises before hearing the door slowly open. 

“Fuck,” Joe whispered as he quickly pulled away from you and backed up so that you both had enough space between you.

“Stay cool,” you mouthed as you saw your sister walk out from the corner of your eye. 

“Hey, lovebirds. I’m not interrupting anything right?” she teased. 

“Uhh….,” you nervously stalled as you tried to come up with an excuse as to why Joe was up here.

“No, not interrupting at all. I just wanted to check our reception seats with Y/N. I think we’re sitting with your parents so I wanted to make sure she was cool with that,” Joe said, saving you both from being caught with a somewhat believable lie. 

“Ah, I see,” she nods, not fully believing him as her eyes darted back and forth from him to you. She noticed that you looked a little shaken up—which you were since she almost caught you both in the act—and that you were anxiously fidgeting with the ring on your left finger. She also noticed that your lipgloss looked smudged and his lips looked more pink than usual.

“Well, I just came to grab Y/N. The girls need your opinion about their shoes real quick since you’re Maid of Honor and apparently your opinion holds more weight,” she said as she turned to face you, not bothering to grill you about how this looked. 

“Right,” you nodded as you glanced over at Joe.

“Go ahead. I’ll see you down there,” Joe said to you with a feverish look, his hand touching your exposed back, sending shivers throughout your body before he said bye to your sister and turned around.

“See you in a bit,” you said as you turned back to look at him, your mind fixated on the heated look he gave you as he turned around again before he walked back down the hall to the elevator. 

You look back at your sister, noticing her skeptical facial expression. “What?” you laughed as you crossed your arms. 

“Ohh, nothing,” she smiled as she grabbed your hand and pulled you back into the room.

After the Wedding Ceremony 

“I got you your favorite,” Joe said as he handed you a peach mojito and sat back down next to you with his drink.

“Thank you,” you said to him, squeezing his thigh underneath the table as you took a sip of the fruity beverage. The wedding ceremony had concluded a few hours ago and it was nothing short of magical and fairytale-like. You and Joe were currently seated at the table with your parents, having a few drinks and catching up while your sister and her husband were making their rounds around the party. 

“So Joe, how’s football going? Think we’ll see another AFC title this year?” your dad asked him.

“Dad,” you said, sending him daggers with your eyes. “I told you, no football talk tonight. Let Joe have a rest day,”.

“It’s Okay, Y/N,” Joe laughed, grabbing your hand underneath the table and giving it a reassuring squeeze. “I hope so. We’re taking it day by day still but I feel good about everything but I know it won’t be easy,” he said to your dad. 

“Well, just know that we’re proud of you and you’re doing great,” your mom chimed in. 

“I’ll double down on that,” your dad added.

“Thanks, guys,” Joe smiled. 

Your parents had seen Joe’s football journey since the beginning just like you had. They were practically a second set of parents for him given how close you two were and his relationship with them was something Joe held incredibly close to his heart, something he wouldn’t ever want to replace. 

“Y/N, you really outdid yourself with these flowers,” your mom pointed out. “You better keep the contact of whichever florist you found because this looks amazing,”. 

“Actually,” you said, looking over at Joe. “You should be thanking Joe. The original florist canceled at the last minute a few weeks ago and he actually pulled a few strings and got one of the best florists money can buy to come through. Even picked out most of the flowers himself,”. 

“Well that was sweet,” your dad smiled as he took a sip of his champagne. 

“Very,” your mom added. “But did we expect any less from him? He has an excellent track record of coming to Y/N’s rescue whenever she needs to be saved. He’s always been so good to her,”. 

“Okayyyy, that’s enough of that. I can just feel his ego getting bigger by the second,” you laughed as you poked his shoulder. 

“Someone’s just mad that I have exceptional taste in flowers,” he said as he turned his head and leaned in closer.

You raised your eyebrow, “You wish. I would’ve done just fine without your help,” you scoffed as you leaned in closer, your eyes navigating down to his plump pink lips. God, you wanted nothing more than to kiss him right now.

“Okay, let’s not get into a fistfight at your sister's wedding now,” your mom said as she got up with your dad. “We’re going to go make some rounds around the room. Try not to murder each other while we’re gone,” she smiled. 

“No promises,” Joe joked as he watched them walk away, his head turning back to look at you, watching as you were laughing to yourself.

“And what’re you laughing about?” he asked.

“They thought we were going to fight, that’s funny,” you giggled. “More like kiss the hell out of you but I guess they couldn’t catch onto that,”. 

He leaned in closer and you could feel his heated gaze on you as you started fidgeting with your ring again. “You know, we didn’t get to finish what we started in the hallway earlier,” he whispered into your ear. You felt his hand creep through the slit of your dress and to your bare thigh, your cheeks heating up again as you could practically hear your heartbeat.

“Joe, we’re in a hall filled with people,” you whispered, moving his hand out from under your dress. 

“So?” he said looking around. “Everyone’s doing their own thing, nobody’s looking at us,” he said as he moved his hand back to your thigh. 

“I’m not going to kiss you in a room filled with people who think we’re just friends,” you laughed. “I’ll have every single female in this room out for my blood,”.

“Who said anything about kissing?” he whispered as you felt his hand creep up your thigh, inching closer to your heat. Your breath hitched as you felt his fingers ghost over your core through your lace panties, your body jerking when you felt his fingers against your folds. “Joe,” you whispered.

“What, Baby?” he whispered in your ear.

You turned your head to meet his eyes, opening your mouth to say something but before you could, someone interrupted you. 

“Y/N! There you are,” you could recognize that fake tone of voice anywhere. Veronica. 

You turned your head to face her, watching as she sat down across from you and Joe, the fakest smile plastered on her face and a glass of champagne in her hand. “I’ve been looking all over for you,” she smiled.

"Were you looking for me or looking for my boyfriend?" you thought to yourself.  

“Hey, Veronica,” you forcefully smiled and nodded at her. 

“And you must be Joe,” she said, turning her head towards Joe and batting her eyelashes. 

“Nice to meet you,” Joe smiled, his finger sliding your panties to the side causing you to bump your leg against the table at the sudden movement. You looked over at Joe who was looking straight ahead at Veronica, a smug look on his face as she was introducing herself to him. 

You gasped lightly when you felt Joe’s fingers sneak up to your clit, his thumb toying with the sensitive bud which made your body jerk again, your hand gripping the table as he entered two fingers into your soaking core. 

“Mmph,” you quietly moaned into your hand as you placed your elbow on the table and covered your mouth.

“So Joe, Is it true what they say about professional athletes’ taste in ice cream?” she smirked at him, clearly using ice cream as a relationship and sexual innuendo. Your eyes widened at her boldness and at the fact that Joe was pumping his fingers in and out of you with zero shame. He started to rub circles around your clit with his thumb, your leg twitching as you started to feel restless. 

"This Bitch.." you thought to yourself as you squirmed in your seat.

“Uhh, what do they say?” Joe asked her as he glanced over at you, your pleasure rapidly building up as you were struggling to stifle your moans. 

“Hm,” you lightly inhaled as you sat back again and tried to act normal, but it was not working very well.

“Y/N, are you alright?” Veronica asked as she looked over at you, the suspicion on her face evident.

“Yeah, uh, I’m fine,” you winced as you felt his fingers pick up the pace, your arousal begging to be released, your eyes looking over at Joe a few times who was still looking ahead with a smirk on his face. Just a few more pumps and you’d reach your pleasure, you wanted him to stop because if you got caught this would be incredibly hard to explain, but you needed him to keep going. 

“Oookay..Anyway,” she said as she looked back over at Joe. “That they don’t stick to one flavor so they can try every kind without feeling the need to have the same boring one for the rest of their lives?”.

“Hmph,” you moaned into your hand as you covered your mouth again, the urge to slap Veronica across the face almost as strong as the urge to come undone right now. You felt your belly flutter at the gentle shock of pleasure vibrating throughout your body once Joe had hit your sweet spot, your hands gripping the tablecloth incredibly tightly as you were just seconds away from feeling pure bliss.

“Uhhh,” Joe nervously laughed as he gave your core a few more pumps, feeling your walls start to tighten around them. You were so incredibly close, but then he slipped his fingers out of your core, leaving you stranded on the edge. You felt everything go still as you let out a shaky breath when you looked over at him, your eyes widening at what he had just done. 

“I see you’ve tried a few flavors before but none of them seem to have stuck with you, it seems like you got bored. Hm, have you thought about trying strawberry?” she winked, clearly referring to herself and her obnoxious red hair. 

“No actually, I haven’t. I’m not a big strawberry ice cream kinda guy.” Joe laughed again, sliding his wet fingers across your bare thigh and giving your twitching leg a few loving squeezes. “Is it good?”.

Was Joe just painfully oblivious to what she was actually talking about or was he doing this on purpose? Whatever it was, you couldn’t sit there for another second and listen as the ache between your thighs was getting stronger and the incredibly needy comments Veronica was passing were making you sick to your stomach. 

“Uhh, excuse me,” you said as you quickly got up from your seat. 

“You Okay?” Joe innocently smiled at you as if he didn’t know what was wrong. 

“Yeah, I just feel sick all of a sudden. Might be from the shrimp I had earlier, I’m going to take a breather,” you lied as you looked over at Veronica, wanting to wipe the grin off her face as she was practically making googly eyes at Joe. 

You quickly walked away before Joe could say anything else, your stomach doing backflips as your brain started to register what had happened underneath that table. He actually just did that in front of Veronica, in front of everyone. 

“I should go check on her,” Joe said as he glanced back at your figure that was getting further and further away. 

“I’m sure she’s fine,” Veronica chirped as she watched Joe get up from his seat, a scoff following as she watched Joe ignore her and walk away. 

Meanwhile, you hand wandered out of the Reception hall and were leaning against the bathroom door, staring off into space before you felt a familiar pair of lips press a kiss on your shoulder. 

“Absolutely not!” you clamored as you turned around to face Joe. 

“What?” he innocently chuckled.

“You know exactly what,” you huffed, crossing your arms and sending him a look that he would easily understand.

“What’s wrong?” he asked.

“Oh I don’t know, maybe the fact that my boyfriend just fingered me under the fucking table, didn’t even finish me off, and then proceeded to blatantly flirt with the same girl that was talking about making a move on you earlier right in front of me,” you grumbled. 

“I’ve never seen you Jealous before,” he smiled. “It’s kinda hot,”. 

Your mouth dropped open, “Are you serious right now?”. You were a little mad about the Veronica thing but it didn’t really bother you because you knew that Joe wouldn’t ever look at another girl the way he looks at you, and to be completely honest with yourself you were more mad that he did that under the table and didn’t let you finish. 

You scoffed and started to walk down the hall, glancing back to see if Joe was following you, which he was. He walked a little faster and grabbed your hand, pulling you back towards him in one strong pull. 

“Okay, Okay. I’m sorry for feeding into her terrible attempt at flirting with me,” he said, his eyes filled with adoration as he squeezed your hand. 

You continued to stare at him, not responding to his apology on purpose before you felt him pull you into his chest, his mouth inches from your ear. “Let me make it up to you,” his hot breath made your core throb again. 

“How?” you whispered to him.

“Let me finish what I started under that table,” he whispered into your ear again. “We both know that’s the real reason you’re mad,”

You looked back into his infatuated eyes, a smile creeping onto your face as you looked behind him and then behind you to make sure nobody was around. The ache between your thighs was still there, calling his name just like how your heart was. You couldn’t stay mad at him, not when he looked at you like this. 

“Deal,” you whispered as you grabbed his hand, urgently pulling him down the hall.

“Where are we going?”. 

You stopped once you got to the bedroom suites, slowing down your pace as you walked past each room before reaching yours. “My room,” you smiled at him, pulling out your keycard and unlocking the door. 

“Thank God for wedding venues with bedrooms,” Joe mumbled to himself as you dragged him inside, quickly closing the door and backing him up against it as you got straight to business. Your hands tangled in his hair as you met for a passionate kiss, your lips then trailing down to his neck where you absentmindedly nipped his skin while kissing it. 

“We have to be quick,” you panted as you pulled away from him. 

He nodded before pulling you into the bathroom, quickly helping you onto the countertop before unbuckling his belt and pulling his pants and boxers down in one swift motion. He moved his hands under your dress, sliding your drenched panties to the side before thrusting into you, a throaty moan coming from your lips at the sudden intrusion. 

You’d never get sick of this feeling. Ever since you and Joe got a taste of what this felt like with each other, neither of you could resist sneaking away for a few moments and feeling this way again and again. It didn’t matter where you were, it didn’t matter when it was, but it always started & ended with you both feeling like horny college kids. Call it making up for lost time if you will? 

“Joe,” you whimpered as you grabbed onto his shoulders, his thrusts picking up as the sounds coming from your lips got louder. 

“Fuck, you feel so good,” he smiled as he dropped his head to your shoulder, your hands finding themselves in his hair. 

“Fuck, harder,” you moaned into his ear, his merciless pace doing wonders for you. He smiles, moves his head back to yours, and captures your lips in a sloppy kiss as he quickened his pace, rapidly thrusting into your slick core which meshed with both your moans and created a familiar harmonious melody that echoed throughout the room. 

He moved deeper and deeper inside your core with each well-placed thrust, your cushiony walls beginning to tighten around him as you moaned against his lips. “Joe, right there,” his lips glossy and swollen from being attached to yours for too long. He used his hand to spread your legs apart a little more, the increased space allowing him to hit an angle that he hadn’t before. 

“J- Joe,” you struggled to moan as you dropped your head on his shoulder. 

“Remember, you’re the only girl I want,” he moaned as he peppered kisses around your jaw. “Okay?”.

“…Yeah,” you moaned as you felt him hit your sweet spot. “I’m the only girl you want,” you whimpered as you threw your head back against the mirror, the band in your belly tightening as he picked up the pace.

“I’m close,” you whined as you felt yourself clamp down on his thick cock.

He moved his hand underneath your dress again, his fingers coated with your arousal as he began to rub circles around your clit. “Joe, oh my g- god,” you moaned as you felt the band snap, your walls convulsing around him as your body started to shake from the intense feeling. 

“Hang on,” he panted as he picked up his pace again, his hand gripping your waist, his cock twitching inside of your core as he felt himself getting closer to his pleasure. 

A few moments later, you felt him still inside of you as his cum coated your walls, his head dropped to your shoulder again as he bit down on your skin to prevent himself from being too loud, his high washing over him as you were recovering from yours. 

“Shit,” you panted as you rubbed his neck, Joe gently thrusting into you before tapering off.

“If you ever think that I’d want anyone else, you’re crazy,” Joe smiled against your shoulder before tilting his head and pressing kisses to your flushed cheeks. “I don’t give a damn if I have to taste the same flavor of ice cream for the rest of my life,”.

“My kind of ice cream is incredibly delicious,” he said with another kiss on your cheek. “Sweet,” he said with another kiss, this time to your neck. “Kind and gentle,” he said as he kissed your shoulder. “Is 2 in 1 because she’s the love of my life and best friend all in one,” he said with a kiss to your chest. “And far from boring,” he ended with a passionate kiss to your lips, the kiss so intense that it sent you back towards the mirror again. 

“So you do know that she wasn’t talking about ice cream?” you rasped, your voice tired from screaming his name as you felt your heart flutter at his softness and kind words towards you. 

“Obviously,” he laughed as he ran his fingers through his hair. “She wasn’t exactly subtle about it,”.

“Then why were you playing along?”.

“Because I knew it’d make you a little jealous,” he winked. 

“Asshole,” you playfully grumbled as you lightly slapped his chest. 

“I may be an asshole but you still love me,” he said as he raised an eyebrow.

“Unfortunately, that’s something that’ll never change,” you sighed.

“Unfortunately?” he asked. “You say it like it’s a bad thing,”.

“It’s definitely not a bad thing” you grin. “It’s just I love you too much to care about the fact that you did that to me under the table at my sister's wedding, in a room filled with people, and then we proceeded to sneak off mid-party to hook up in the bathroom. If I was with any other guy, I would never even entertain these thoughts. We’re so scandalous,” you said as you wiggled your eyebrows which made him laugh.

“You know I'm not a bad girl, but I seem to be doing bad things with you. I should care, but I don’t,” you blushed. 

“And that’s exactly why you're far from boring; you always seem to surprise me,” he said as he pressed a kiss to your jaw. 

“Love you,” you lazily smiled as you grabbed his face to kiss him again.

“Love you too,” he smiled against your lips. 

A few minutes later, you were both cleaned up and fixing yourselves in the mirror before heading back to the reception. “I hope they didn’t notice we were gone,” you laughed as you fixed a few stray pieces of your hair. 

“I doubt it. They were probably too wrapped up in the party to realize,” he smiled as he fixed his tie. “You ready?” he asked after he was done.

“Mhm,” you nodded, leaning in for one final kiss before getting ready to head back. 

Joe opened your door and stepped out into the hall, you followed him out and closed the door behind you, laughing at a joke he made about how you guys went from sneaking out of weddings to raid the bar to make stronger cocktails to now sneaking out of weddings to have hook up in your room. You were about to reach for his hand before you heard a shriek come from down the hall, your heart stopping when you realized who it was. 

“Busted!” the familiar voice screamed.

“Oh, fuck,” you froze as you realized who it was, being able to recognize that voice anywhere. 

Kaylee. 

You and Joe both looked at each other before looking at Kaylee who was speed walking down the hall to you, both your cheeks turning red as you were caught red-handed. 

“Kaylee,” you forcefully smiled.

“I knew it. I knew it. And you said you were just friends…Ha…Funny,” she laughed. 

“Uhh, Kaylee are you okay?” Joe asked her, his palms getting sweaty as he quickly glanced over at you. 

“I’m great, Joe. Are you okay? You got a little something on your neck,” she said, pointing out the tiny purple bruise on his neck. 

“Fuck,” you mumbled under your breath. 

“Oh, and Y/N, did you bump into something?” She said as she moved her hand to the mark on your shoulder, leaning in to look at it closely. “Oh wait, that looks like a bite mark?”.

“Shit,” Joe mouthed as he looked into your eyes, both of you frozen and having no idea how to play this off. 

“We were just…,” you started to say but not being able to come up with anything.

“We were just taking a breather,” Joe interrupted. 

“Uh huh,” your sister nodded. “So that explains the flushed cheeks, obvious hickey, bite mark on your shoulder, and the fact that Joe’s lips are covered with lipgloss,” your sister said looking at you. “Not to mention whatever I interrupted in the hallway outside the bridal suite earlier was clearly the first part of whatever happened in that room,” she smirked as she pointed behind you.

You quietly stared at your sister, your mind completely blank as you had no idea how to lie to her because she quite literally had caught you both in the act. 

“I…” you trailed off before you felt Joe lightly bump into your shoulder, making you look up at him. One thing about you and Joe was that you could tell each other a thousand words by just looking into each other’s eyes. He didn’t need to say anything but you knew exactly what he was saying to you; his soft gaze calming your nerves, the warmth in his eyes showing that he genuinely cared about you, the adorable crinkles in the corner of his eyes coming out, and his gentle and steady eye contact reassuring you that everything was perfectly fine. 

You nodded your head once you got the message he was trying to convey and looked back at your sister. “We’re dating,” you blurted out.

Kaylee stayed quiet for a few moments and looked back and forth between you two, “Well obviously,” she laughed.

“What?” you deadpanned, your heart-stopping. 

“Y/N, I’m your sister. I know when something’s up with you,” she grinned. “I had a feeling something was going on after that Christmas party you went to together. You started acting weird after that and the phone call we had the night before the party was strange so then I put 2 and 2 together. There was a high chance that I could’ve been wrong but I had a gut feeling,”.

“Damn,” you whispered to yourself. Were you really that bad at hiding it or was Joe’s effect on you just that noticeable? 

“But I’m really happy for you both,” she said. “I always knew you two were meant to be but I was called delusional every time by Y/N over here,” she laughed as she looked at Joe. “Besides, I see the way you look at her, Joe. The eyes never lie,”. 

“Only took us about 9 years but here we are,” Joe said, pulling you closer to him and kissing your forehead. The blissful looks on both of your faces right now matched how you felt with each other. 

“This is the best wedding gift you could possibly give me. My baby sister is finally with her Prince Charming,” she cooed as she gently punched your shoulder.

“Yeah,” you said. “I guess I am,” you smiled up at Joe.

“You know, the wedding setup is still here and I bet my wedding dress fits you,” your sister teased. “You guys can pull a fast one on everyone. I won’t snitch. You can even use that ring on your left hand, Y/N. By the way, Joe, nice taste in jewels,”.

“How did you..,” you questioned since you thought she believed your lie about the ring being from an antique shop.

“I had a hunch,” she winked at you and Joe. “That ring screams expensive,”.

“What were you going to do if you didn’t catch us together like this? Because we weren’t planning on telling anyone for a little longer but it sounds like you were on the case for a while now,” you wondered. 

“Hmm, I probably would’ve encouraged Veronica to steal Joe for a dance to get you to rile you up and get a reaction out of you. No way you’d let her be alone with him,” she giggled.

“I would’ve killed you if you did that,” you scowled, feeling Joe laugh above you at your adorable defensiveness. 

“Okay, Okay,” she laughed while throwing her hands up. “Note to self, steer Veronica away from Joe if I want to live to see my honeymoon,” she giggled.

“Mhm,” you nodded.

“I should get back to the party considering I am the lady of the hour but I want details later. All of them,” she pointed at you both.

“Yes, Ma’am,” Joe saluted before she opened her arms and lept onto you both, pulling you in for a tight hug.

“Ahh, I can’t believe you two finally did it,” she hooted as squeezed you both. “This is the best thing ever!”. 

You looked up at Joe with a heartfelt smile, one that said everything without saying anything just like the looks in both your eyes. Your sister released you both from the hug a few seconds later and said “Make sure to cover those up before you go back in,” while pointing at your shoulder and his neck.

You covered your face with your hands out of embarrassment and let out a soft whine as she walked away, “Remember, no babies out of wedlock! Wrap it before you tap it,” she laughed.

“Oh my god,” you said, your face reddening as you looked over at Joe who was laughing to himself about how comical this situation was.

“If you had told me a few years ago that your sister would be warning us to have protected sex to not have a child out of marriage, I would’ve laughed in your face and walked out the door,” he smiled. 

“That makes two of us. God, I cannot believe she saw that,” you smiled as let out a breath you didn’t realize you were holding before looking back up at Joe, his cheeks a little red and his eyes glistening. “You look happy, though,” you said, rubbing his shoulder. 

“That’s because I am happy,” he hummed before he leaned down to press a sweet kiss to your lips. “I love you,”.

“And I love you,” you smiled at him before pecking his lips again.

“I guess we should probably tell your parents now that your sister knows,” Joe said as he grabbed your hand and slowly started leading you back to the reception hall.

“I guess so,” you sighed. “Be prepared for my Mom to hound you with questions about your intentions though. She loves you to death but you’re the boyfriend now and not just the best friend. There’s some pressure on you,”.

“Oh, I’m prepared. I know what my intentions are and I'm not afraid to voice them,” he winked at you, another chill running down your spine as you could practically feel the tenderness and reassurance in his voice. 

A few minutes later, you’re back inside the hall and sitting at the table again with your parents who thankfully hadn’t noticed your absence. They were talking to Joe about needing some help with moving some furniture out of the house and given the gentleman Joe was, he happily said yes. 

You cleared your throat a few moments later and sat up, squeezing Joe’s thigh under the table to get his attention. He looked over at you and met your eyes, your eyes once again telling him everything without needing to say anything. He gave you a small nod before you turned around to your parents.

“So, Mom, Dad,” you said, looking at both of them. “I have something to tell you both,”.

“Go ahead, sweetie,” your mom smiled as she placed her drink down.

You took a deep breath, “I’m seeing someone,” you smiled, feeling Joe grab your hand under the table.

“Really?” your parents asked, both of their eyes lighting up. 

“Yeah,” you nodded. “I have been for about a month now,”.

“Do we know him?” your dad asked, putting his elbow on the table and grabbing his drink.

“Yeah actually,” you laughed as you saw Joe blush from the corner of your eye. “You know him pretty well,”.

“Are you going to tell us his name?” your Dad laughed at your vagueness. 

“Honey, I think she wants us to play the guessing game,” your Mom chuckled. “Am I right, Y/N?”.

You bit your lip and nodded your head, Joe’s fingers softly rubbing your hand as he tried hard to remain quiet. 

“You always loved to play the guessing game as a child, I should’ve seen this coming,” your Dad shook his head.

“Okay then, what does he do? Does he have a stable job?” your mom asked. 

“He’s involved in sports, it’s very stable and it pays very well,” you said, glancing around and not meeting her eyes because this could make it so obvious.

“Okay,” your dad nodded. “How is he? Describe him,”.

“Well, he is the sweetest guy I’ve ever met. He’s really kind, super smart, genuine, caring, and has a great sense of humor. He’s also a big nerd but never likes to admit it because he has this cool guy attitude on the surface,” you say as you feel Joe bump your leg with his leg under the table, making you look over at him and see him give you a look that makes you want to explode into a cloud of pink dust. 

“He’s really athletic too. One of the absolute best at what he does,” you bragged as you looked back at your parents.

“Is he an athlete or something?” your mom asked as she took a sip of her water. 

“Mhm,” you nodded. 

“What sport?” your dad asked. “This guy might be giving Joe a run for his money,” he laughed as he looked at your mom.

You pursed your lips to hide your smile, watching as Joe laughed along with them from the corner of your eye.  

“If I told you the sport it would give it away,” you said matter-of-factly. 

“Okay, well keep going then. You seem to be in a secretive mood tonight,” your mom said.

“Okay, he never fails to make me feel like the most important girl on the planet, never fails to tell me how beautiful and special I am, and never fails to tell me and show me how much he loves me. He cares a lot about me and I feel at home whenever I’m with him, and I haven’t felt that way with any guy before. And whenever we’re around each other I can’t help but fall even more in love with him,” you blushed. 

“Love?” your mom said as she raised an eyebrow. “It’s only been a month though?”.

“It’s only been a month since we’ve been dating but I’ve known him for about 9 years,” you smiled as you leaned back against your chair and looked over at Joe.

“9 years? So she met him in college?” your dad said as he looked at your mom.

“Y/N, why didn’t you bring him to the wedding? No offense Joe, you know we love you, but you should’ve told this mystery man to come. I’m sure we could’ve added an extra invitation,” your Mom said.

Joe was about to say something before you grabbed his hand, “Actually,” you said while picking his hand up from under the table and pressing a kiss to it in front of your parents. “I did bring him with me,”. 

Your parents went silent as they looked at you both and then at each other, “Oh. Ohhhh,” your Mom said as she looked back at you with realization, her eyes softening once she put the puzzle together in her head. “You two,” she said, choking up a little and placing her hand over her heart. “Oh my god,” she said as she looked over at your Dad. 

“Well, would you look at that? It’s about damn time,” he cheered as leaned back and crossed his arms, a huge smile on his face. “I knew this would happen at some point,”.

“Did everyone see it this entire time except for us?” you shook your head as you looked at Joe. 

“I guess so,” he grinned as he placed his arm around your shoulder and brought you in closer. 

You looked over at your Mom who was using a tissue to soak up a few tears in her eyes, “Mom, are you crying?” you pouted. 

“Yes,” she said with a smile. “You have no idea how happy this makes me,”.

“That makes two of us,” Joe said, looking down at you with what looked like real-life heart eyes. 

“I mean you two have been such good friends since college and seeing you both like this,” she said as she felt more tears coming. “I’m just so happy for you both. I couldn’t ask for a better man for my Y/N,”. 

“Ditto. You two are excellent for each other, it all makes perfect sense,” your Dad nodded with a fervent smile. 

“Thanks, Mom and Dad,” you smiled as you dropped your head against Joe’s shoulder, feeling him press two kisses to your forehead before feeling him rest his head against yours.

“You have to tell us everything. How did this happen?” your Dad asked as reached for a glass of water to hand your Mom. 

“It’s quite the story,” Joe smiled as he placed his hand in your hand and started to tell them how this all came to be, your heart growing from all the love you were feeling around you, a majority of it coming off of the man next to you. 

A week later 

“You ready?” Joe asked as he turned the key to the golf cart.

“Absolutely,” you grinned as you crossed your legs and leaned back. “I still can’t believe you bought a golf cart,”.

“Well, this neighborhood is pretty big and there’s a lot of trails and paths around so I thought this would be the right investment,” he smiled at you as he backed out of the driveway. “And also because once you move in we can do nightly drives instead of nightly walks so we don’t get tired halfway through and you beg me for a piggyback ride home,”.

“Hey, don’t act like you don’t enjoy it just as much as I do,” you pointed at him. “But anyway, I can’t wait to move in with you. One more month and I’m all yours,” you bit your lip while rubbing his thigh. 

“You’re already all mine,” he said, leaning in for a quick peck before beginning the drive. 

“That I am,” you smiled as you turned your head back to the road, watching as the sun set over the beautiful Ohio River where you and Joe were driving down to as his house sat right by the water.

“I’m getting major Deja Vu,” he said as he turned onto the grassy path that led down to the river. “Do you remember when we stole that neighbor's golf cart when we went on that beach trip during spring break back at Ohio State?”.  

“You mean the beach trip from hell?” you giggled. “Oooh yeah, I remember,” you nodded. 

Flashback to Spring Break - Ohio State 

“Joe, what if someone sees?” you whisper yelled at him while he was trying to grab the keys to your neighbor’s golf cart from the patio table, your eyes darting back and forth from the door to Joe. 

“Almost..got it…,” he whispered as he grabbed the keys from the table, then carefully sneaked past the windows and made it to the ledge. “Let’s go,” he said as he hopped down from the patio.

“Fuck, we’re going to get in so much trouble,” you laughed as you slid into the golf cart, Joe doing the same and then turning on the cart. 

“I honestly could care less. Anything to get me the hell out of this house for even 10 minutes will suffice,” he said as he quickly backed out of the driveway and started driving towards the beach. 

“Are you alright?” you asked him, rubbing his shoulder as you noticed his exhausted body language. 

“Could be better,” he sighed as he turned onto the beach, driving you both alongside the ocean.

“You wanna talk about it? You know I’m always here,” you said.

He stayed silent for a few seconds, your heartbeat picking up because he wasn’t saying anything and you were getting worried because he was usually quick to confide in you.

“Joe,” you said, gently squeezing his thigh.

“It’s Audrey,” he sighed. 

You went silent at the name. Audrey was Joe’s girlfriend, or situationship as everyone liked to call it. 

“What happened now?” you asked, pulling the hood of your sweatshirt up as you tried to block the cool ocean breeze out. 

Joe turned the cart to face the water before putting it in park, giving you both some time to talk while enjoying the view of the ocean. 

“Just everything,” he sighed as he placed his arm around the back of your seat. “Nothing I do is good enough for her. No matter how hard I try to make things work, she always does something that ruins it,”.

You felt your heart drop at his words, you wished you could do something to make him feel better but you couldn’t. You promised yourself that you’d never put yourself on the field in Joe’s love life. You’d watch from the sidelines, cheering him on with whichever girl captured his heart, even though silently you wished that the girl was you. 

It was enraging watching as Audrey played with Joe’s feelings, always dragging him along even though she clearly didn’t treat him the way he treated her. He knew that he deserved better but each time he tried to pull away, she’d always bring him back and give him hope that things would be different but they never were.

“I mean, just this morning I woke up early to make her breakfast but she decided to go out and get an acai bowl or something and then got mad that I was making you breakfast when she got back,” he shook his head. 

“Are you serious?” you laughed. “Why is she always so petty about everything,”.

“I wish I had an answer. It’s just exhausting being around her. We have moments where things feel normal but they’re very very short moments,” he said as he ran his fingers through his hair. 

“Have you tried talking to her about it?” you asked.

“I did…Just before the trip. I told her that I wanted things to work and she agreed, I also told her where I stood and how this trip was a kind of ‘make it or break it’ for us,” he said.

“What’d she say? you bit your lip while playing with the bracelets on your wrist. 

“She said she understood and gave me the impression that things would be different this weekend. But ever since we’ve been here she’s been on me for literally everything. It was the breakfast thing this morning, then it was her getting mad that we went out for ice cream yesterday without her even though we didn’t even ask the others if they wanted to come so it’s not like we specifically left her out, and then it was her getting mad that we all wanted to go to the pier last night but she wanted to stay in and watch TV,”

“Who stays inside and watches TV while you’re at the fucking beach?” you grimaced. 

“Then it was her getting upset that you were even on the trip in the first place even though I literally told her you were coming,” he shrugged, his eyes quickly darting to you as he realized how bad that sounded. “Sorry about that. I know she isn’t exactly the nicest to you,”.

“No offense taken. I get a vibe from her that tells me everything I need to know,” you sighed. 

“You know what? That’s another thing. She knows you’re my best friend but still treats you like shit for absolutely no reason. It’s like she doesn’t care about anything important in my life,” he ranted.

Important. You were important to Joe. 

You looked at him for a few seconds before dropping your head on his shoulder, his arm wrapping around you as if it were a reflex. “I’m sorry,” you said to him. “I know it’s hard and you deserve so much more,”.

“You have nothing to be sorry for. I’m the one that has the worst taste in girls,” he softly chuckled as he rubbed your shoulder, his phone vibrating on the dash which diverted his attention. 

He leaned forward to see who it was, “Speaking of…,” he said as he grabbed his phone.

“It’s like she’s listening to our conversations,” you joked. “You sure she didn’t bug you?”.

“Wouldn’t be surprised if she did,” he laughed as he opened up the texts.

You watched as Joe’s smile dropped as his eyes skimmed her lengthy text message.

“What’d she say?” you asked.

“Basically asking where I went and why didn’t I tell her I was going somewhere. Then accusing me of sneaking off with you since she doesn’t know where you went either,” he said.

“Well, she’s not wrong about that part,” you shrugged.

“Then she said this isn’t working, I’m not trying hard enough, and that she’s been miserable since she’s been here,” he said as he turned off his phone.

“Damn, no text back?” you said while looking out to the open waters. 

“Nope. I’m done with this bullshit. If she thinks I’m not doing enough then she needs to wake the hell up,” he said as he pulled you in closer. “I’ve tried to do fun stuff with her since we’ve been here but she doesn’t want to do anything other than sit and be mad at me for no reason. I’ve been trying for months. A relationship is a two-way street and I’m not going to work on it if she isn’t going to try. It’s draining and I can’t do it,”.  

“You deserve better, Joe,” you say, tilting your head to look at him. “You’re such an amazing guy and have so much to offer and if Audrey can’t see that, then she isn’t the one,”. 

“I know,” he sighed. “It just sucks when you spend time on someone who you thought was your person,”. 

You looked out at the ocean again, “Did you know that 80% of the ocean is unexplored?”.

“Yeah..” he confusingly said, wondering what this had to do with what you were just talking about.

“Well, the unexplored parts of the ocean probably have new species, new ecosystems, and things we haven’t seen before. In love, there are so many things to explore just like in those unknown parts of the ocean. So many chances to find a deeper connection, to find out things about yourself and other people, to do new things and see new places, and so many chances to find your person. There are endless possibilities. You’ll find your person, I know she’s out there. It might take some exploring and some waiting, but you’ll find her one day,” you said, feeling a visceral ache in your heart because you wanted to be his person so badly. “And she’ll be the one who showers you with all the love you deserve and the same love you give to others,”. 

“You know, you should really do a Ted-Talk episode one day,” he laughed, squeezing your shoulder gently. Your words meant the world to him, especially since he had a secret crush on you, and hearing you talk to him about finding his person just made him think of you. He wanted you to be his person, he wanted to explore these things with you.   

“I think I just might,” you grinned. 

“Thanks for that though. You always know how to make me feel better, I don’t know how you do it, but you always say the right things every time,” he said, shaking your shoulder and looking down at you.

Before you could say something, you heard a piercing shriek come from behind you. Both of you jumped in your seat and turned around and saw Audrey speed-walking towards you both with a fearful look on her face. “Joe!” she screamed. “Why the hell are you out here with her?”.

“Uh oh,” you said as you turned back around, watching Joe quickly switch the cart from park to drive. “What are you doing?”.

“Getting us the hell out of here,” he nodded as he turned the steering wheel and floored the cart. 

He told you to hang on as he tried to get away from her as fast as he could, which was pretty fast because you were practically zooming down the beach and Audrey’s figure quickly faded into the background.

“Oh my god,” you screamed as you hit a bump on the sand that nearly caused you two to spin out, the adrenaline rush keeping you from making him stop the cart.

“Hold on,” Joe yelled as he quickly made a turn onto one of the streets that led down to the main road, your hands clutching onto his arm as you pulled yourself closer to him.

“Joeeee, slow down,” you laughed as you tightly held onto his body, the force of the cart & wind giving you whiplash.

End of flashback 

“I can’t believe she snitched on us for stealing the cart because we drove off,” you laughed. 

“I remember seeing steam practically coming off of her face when she was walking towards us. Scary sight,” he said, bumping into your shoulder as he drove you two along the path. 

“The latter half of the trip after she left was pretty enjoyable though,” you said as you propped your feet up on the dash of the cart.

“Very. I still can’t believe you threw up in my hat after we rode the slingshot,” he chuckled as he placed his arm around your shoulder.

“Please don’t remind me of that ever again. That was so embarrassing,” you said as remembered the grotesque memory and hid your face in his chest.

Joe pressed a kiss to your head before changing the subject, “Okay, I won’t make you relive that but we should really go back there this off-season. Just the two of us though,”.

“I’d love to, we made some pretty great memories on that trip together,” you said as you pressed yourself closer to him.

“This time, make sure to not eat a soft pretzel and funnel cake before getting on the slingshot,” he warned you.

“You got it,” you saluted. “I can’t believe this is my first off-season with you,” the river trail getting closer to you both as you continued talking. 

“What do you mean? I usually spent a lot of time with you in previous off-seasons,” he said. 

“I know, but I mean this is my first one as your girlfriend,” you say, playfully poking his shoulder. “I get to do a lot more with you now,” you beamed.

“Oh yeah?” he smirked. “Like what?” he said, wiggling his eyebrows, his words laced with mischief. 

“Ohhh I don’t know, maybe watch some movies, teach you how to cook some more, swim in the pool, amongst other things,” you tease.

“What are the other things?” he said as you made it down to the trail, now driving alongside the river.

“I guess you’ll just have to find out when the time comes,” you winked.

“Such a tease,” he shook his head before slowing down once you reached the rocks that you two would sit on by the water when you came down here.

Joe switched off the golf cart before hopping out and helping you out, then carefully led you down to the rocks–making sure you didn’t almost fall like how you did the first time–and then sat you down on a rock he deemed stable and secure and then plopped down on a rock next to you. 

“This is nice,” he said, letting out a relaxed sigh as he watched the sunset.

“What is?” you laughed as you looked over at him.

“Doing stuff like this with you. Everything just feels so easy with us…like I don’t have to jump through hoops to make this work,” he said, looking over at you and seeing how the cool January breeze made your nose red. “I don’t think I’ve ever been this happy and at peace in my life,”. 

“I’m glad you’re happy, Joe,” you grinned as you pulled your sweatshirt sleeves out to cover your chilled hands. “You deserve it,”.

“Are you cold?” he asked as he sat up.

“A l- little,” you mumbled as you felt a chill run up your spine.

“Here,” Joe said as he opened up his legs and scooched back. “Come sit with me,” he said, pointing at the space between his legs. 

You smiled and got up, carefully moving over to where he was, and sat down between his legs. His arms instantly wrapped around your waist as he pulled you back into his chest, his body warmth quickly heating you up. 

“Mmm, you’re so warm,” you hummed as you rested your head against his shoulder and turned your head to press a kiss to his fragrant neck; the smell of his gentle cologne filling your nostrils.  

“Are you happy?” Joe asked as he continued to stare out at the water, his grip on you tightening. 

You were quiet for a few seconds before speaking up, “Of course I’m happy, this is all I’ve ever wanted. You’ve all I’ve ever wanted. And now I have it and it’s even better than imagined. It quite literally can’t get better than this,” you smiled up at him. 

“I’m glad. It’s not just me who deserves it, we deserve it,” he beamed as he leaned down to kiss you. 

After holding the kiss for a few seconds, you both pull away and look ahead at the slowing descending sun, the sky getting darker as the moments go by. “You excited for the first playoff game tomorrow?” you asked him as you placed your hand on top of his. 

“Excited, prepared, a little nervous,” he sighed as he laced his fingers with yours. 

“You’re going to do great, I have full confidence in you and the guys,” you told him. “You’ve been playing really really well recently and I know that tomorrow's game is going to be good,”.

“I hope so,” he nodded before looking down at you, an idea coming into his head. “Hey, you should come down to the sidelines before the game so I can see you,”.

“What? In front of everyone?” you asked as you felt a little nervous at the thought of being down there in front of everyone, usually a spot that was reserved for the family of the players. 

“Yeah, why not? You’re my girlfriend and girlfriends get to come to the sidelines along with other immediate family if they want to,” he smiled. “Besides, only a matter of time before the fans figure out that we’re together which would confirm their already established theories,” he giggled. “And I need my good luck kiss,” he sneaked in.

You let out a soft laugh, “Okay, I’ll be there,”. You always supported Joe when it came to football, even if it was from a distance; but now it was time for you to be front and center.

“Wear some of your peach lip gloss too,” he mumbled as he kissed your cheek. 

“That’s your favorite I assume?” you asked.

“Mhmmm,” he hummed as he kissed your cheek again. “Although, watermelon might give it a run for its money. We may have to test it out some more,”.

“Deal,” you grinned. “Just promise me you’ll win the game,”.

“I promise,” he nodded. “I’m going to win the game and then I’m going to take you out for dinner after,” he added.

“Won’t you be tired though?” you furrow your brows. 

“Probably, but that’s fine. If anything we can just bring it back to the house and stuff our faces with delicious food while sitting on the couch in our jammies and watching the latest episode of Love Island so you don’t miss it,” he smiled. 

“I like youu,” you grinned like a little kid at his tempting words.

“Guess what?” he asked you. 

“What?”.

“I like you too,” he whispered into your ear as he found himself remembering a similar moment like this from a few years ago. 

Flashback to LSU – 2019 (in the same flashback period as the 2019 LSU flashback from part 1 & post-breakup with your ex jake)

Today was the day.

Today was the day Joe was going to tell you how he felt about you.

You had flown in early yesterday morning and had surprised him last night at his game and were staying in Baton Rouge for 3 more days. Joe made it his mission to come clean about his feelings within these 3 days, hopefully today so that he could get it over with. He just couldn’t keep it in anymore. He thought about you every single day and being away from you killed him, especially because he had absolutely 0 idea what was going on in your life (or who was in it) when he wasn’t physically with you. You could only talk about so much over Facetime, 90% of the time not talking about your relationships since neither of you liked to travel into that territory with each other because of how you felt about each other even though you both were incredibly curious about that subject. 

He needed to tell you how he felt before it was too late (preferably before another guy came along), even if you didn’t feel the same way. Those feelings he’d been keeping to himself for years were eating away at him and he could only hold on to them for so much longer. You told him yesterday that you and your now ex-boyfriend Jake had broken up but you weren’t dwelling on it because you hadn’t been together for that long and you were too excited to see Joe to feel bad about the breakup. Joe still felt a bit weird about coming to you with his feelings as you just got out of a relationship but he also just couldn’t keep it in anymore, he was basically a ticking time bomb. He was going to tell you this time, no matter what it took.

This morning Joe brought you and his parents to one of his favorite breakfast spots downtown. You were busy having a conversation with his Mom and Dad about your Thanksgiving plans since it was only a few weeks away while Joe was sitting next to you in the booth picking away at a thumbnail as he couldn’t be more uninterested in the conversation. The only person he wanted to talk to was you, and the only thing he wanted to talk about was his feelings. 

“Ooo, Jimmy look at that,” Robin said as she pointed across the street through the window at your booth. She was pointing over at what looked like a local artist selling paintings of the LSU football team as well as some custom merchandise.

“We should go check it out. I think we have room for a few more paintings around the house,” Jimmy smiled as he got up from the booth and helped Robin up. Both of them excitedly rush to the door and make their way across the street without saying a word to you and Joe, causing you both to laugh. 

“I don’t even know how many paintings or wall pieces they have up in the house anymore. It’s like every time I go back a new one spawns out of nowhere,” Joe shook his head. 

“You’re their golden baby,” you said while rubbing his shoulder. “Embrace it,” you said softly as you placed your chin on it, your lips just inches from his face. 

“I think if I embrace it even more than I already have, I’m going to explode,” he joked as he felt his heart pounding because of how close you were to him.

“Hey, maybe in 15-20 years we can open a Burrow Museum? Get all of the paintings in there, your awards from High School, your eventual Natty and Heisman that you’ll be getting in about 3 months, your future Super Bowl trophies, rings, and MVP awards,” you smiled when you moved away, noticing how his cheeks turned redder while you continued talking.

“Okay, let’s not get ahead of ourselves about the awards and championships,” Joe said while running his hands through his hair. “I’m not even sure if I’ll be getting any of that stuff,”.

“Please,” you scoffed. “I beg to differ,”.

“Anywayy,” Joe changed the subject before you went on another rant about how you thought he was the best college football player in the league and was going to become the top NFL prospect in the next few months. He appreciated when you praised him like this, it meant the world to him especially since it was coming from you, but he also didn’t want to look too far ahead into a future he had no control of. 

He turned a bit more in his seat to face you, taking note of how adorable you looked wearing one of his LSU football shirts which was a few sizes too big on you, your hair in a messy bun, and your beautiful natural face on display. “How are you doing about the whole Jake thing? I didn’t get a chance to talk to you about it and just wanted to know if you were doing okay with it,”. 

You paused for a few seconds, both of you inching into territory that you usually avoided. “I’m fine,” you reassured him. “I kinda saw it coming and came to terms with it a while ago. And you were right, he’s 100% Mr. Lovebombing,”.

“Y/N, I wasn’t being serious when I said that,” Joe said, his smile dropping a bit because he knew how awful it felt to feel that way in a relationship. 

“No, you were right though. One second he was all over me and telling me how I’m his world, the next he was doing anything and everything to dodge having a conversation with me and refused to see me,” you rolled your eyes. “I’m glad I’m done with that BS,”. You honestly weren’t that affected by the breakup as you’d been through much worse many times before. You were too busy looking forward to seeing Joe after 5 long months to think about Jake. 

You both remained silent, Joe not knowing how to go about this since if he confessed his feelings after you said that, it would seem weird and almost selfish. “But enough about me and my sad dating life, what about you? Any girls I should be warned about?” you painfully laughed, not wanting to hear him say ‘yes, there is a girl’. 

He cleared his throat while glancing around the room before meeting your eyes, his palms getting sweaty because he knew that this conversation could lead to him telling you how he truly felt about you. “Uhh, not really. I’ve just been focused on football,” he nodded.

“That’s great,” you smiled, mentally doing a little dance because he didn’t have any other girl in his life but then stopping once you realized how weird that could have sounded. “Uh, I mean. That’s good because you’re focusing on football, not because you don’t have a girlfriend. That sucks,” you blabbed as you scrambled to make it sound better. 

“It’s okay,” he laughed. “I know what you mean,”. 

“Here we go, Joe. Just tell her. It’s the perfect opportunity. It’s not weird or wrong for you to tell her how you feel, and you know how much she appreciates honesty,” Joe thought to himself.

It honestly was the perfect opportunity, his parents weren’t around, and you reassured him that you weren’t bothered by your breakup so it wasn’t like he was pushing you, and it wasn’t out of the blue since you were talking about things related to that subject.

He just had to say it; those 3 words he’d been eager to say since he met you all those years ago. It couldn’t be that difficult to say it, could it? 

“We really have the worst luck when it comes to dating. I mean, why is every person we end up dating such an asshole?” you complained while taking a sip of your orange juice. “Like hello? Universe? What did we do to you?”. 

“Y/N, I have something to tell you,” Joe said while looking over at you, his tone of voice and the look in his eyes changing from playful to serious all of a sudden. 

You placed your glass down, “What is it? Is everything alright?” you asked as you placed your hand on his that was resting on the table. 

“Everything’s fine,” he laughed. “It’s more than fine. It’s just I-,”.

“We’re back!” Robin interrupted as she placed a few bags on the table, your hand quickly moving away from Joe’s. 

“Y/N, we got you a few sweatshirts we thought you might like,” Jimmy smiled as he pulled them out of the bag while Robin pulled out some of the artwork they picked up to show you. 

“Are you serious,” Joe thought to himself as he watched you get distracted by his parents, all of you once again in a conversation while he just sat there and watched. 

“It’s okay, Joe. Just tell her once you're back at your apartment, you have time. Mom and Dad won’t be there,” He thought to himself as he watched your face light up when you saw the artwork that had Joe front in center, your eyes then meeting his with a proud smile. 

A few hours later – Joe’s LSU apartment 

“Your apartment is so comfy,” you giggled as you sat down on the couch across from Joe.

“So it’s not giving Man Cave or Bachelor Pad vibes?” Joe said while pulling your feet into his lap.

“Nope. It’s giving I have a best friend who has excellent taste in decor and she doesn’t mind ordering nice stuff for my apartment,” you winked. 

“I’m a lucky guy,” Joe said, squeezing your foot.

“That you are,” you replied, leaning your head back against the couch cushion and closing your eyes. “I wouldn’t do this for anyone else,”. 

Joe looked at you for a few quiet moments, his heartbeat picking up once again as he found himself thinking about his feelings towards you. This was the perfect moment to tell you how he felt, it was just the two of you. No distractions, interruptions, or oblivious parents in the way.  

“Hey, can I talk to you about something for a second,” Joe said, breaking the silence and causing you to open your eyes and look up. 

“Yeah, of course,” you smiled at him as you moved a few strands of hair out from your face.  

“Okay, come on Joe. Just tell her,” Joe’s subconscious said to him. “It’s just 3 words. 

I. Like. You.

Just say it,”. 

He took a deep breath to calm his nerves, but just before he could open his mouth you both were interrupted by a knock on the front door. 

You turned your head back to look at the door, “I got it,” you said, glancing over at Joe before getting up from the couch. You unlocked the door and opened it, the person standing on the doorstep making your face light up, but Joe’s face drop. 

“Ahh, there’s my favorite Ohio-an. Damn, I missed you Girl,” Ja’marr said as he stepped inside Joe’s apartment and pulled you in for a hug.

“Are you kidding me? Why does everyone keep interrupting us?” Joe thought to himself while rolling his eyes. 

“Missed you too, Ja’marr,” you laughed as you gave him a gentle squeeze before pulling away. “How’s Claire?”. 

“You mean Samantha?” Joe said as he stood up, a little upset because he interrupted you two, prompting both of you to look back at him because of his bitter tone. Joe was a little more than a little pissed off right now. This was the best chance to tell you how he felt since you were fully alone this time, but the universe (or Ja’marr) clearly had other plans. “Or was it Laila?” he huffed out. “I can’t remember. Might be because Ja’marr over here can’t ever keep it in his pants and feels the need to-,”.

“Aye, what’s your deal,” Ja’marr scoffed.

“My deal is that you just-,” Joe started to say as he stepped closer before you interrupted him. 

“Okay! I’m not in the mood to deal with two caveman football players right now,” you reprimanded them. “Ja’marr, let’s go over to the kitchen and get some drinks. Joe, go take a breather or something,” you said, sending him an intense look.

“I just-,”.

“Joe,” you said, sending him another look that he easily understood before he let out a loud sigh and walked past you and Ja’marr to the porch outside his apartment.

“What’s his problem?” Ja’marr shrugged as he followed you into the kitchen.

“Don’t ask me. He’s your best friend,” you laughed as you opened up Joe’s fridge.

“Uhh, he was your best friend first,” Ja’marr pointed out. 

“Hm, touché,” you smiled while pulling out 3 cans of soda. 

Meanwhile, Joe was standing outside the apartment, his heart getting more and more tired from having to wait to tell you how he felt. It’s like every time he opened his mouth to say something, the universe sent something to stop him. 

Was it the universe that was trying to stop him? But why would the universe be doing that? 

“What the fuck,” Joe sighed as he leaned against the wall and dropped his head. “Why is this so hard,”. 

“No, don’t give up Joe. The universe isn’t doing anything, you just have bad timing. You’ll find time to talk to her. You still have the rest of the day. Just breathe,” his subconscious said. 

So that’s what he did. He took a deep breath, walked back inside, apologized for his attitude, and went about the rest of the afternoon like he didn’t have something poking away at him until Ja’marr left. 

Now, you were finally alone again. You were in his bathroom freshening up and Joe was sitting on his bed, anxiously playing with his wristbands and waiting for you to come out so you could talk. He heard the door open and immediately looked up and saw you stepping out from the steamy bathroom in just a plain white towel, your wet hair falling against your shoulders.

“Sorry, I left my clothes on your nightstand,” you blushed as you walked over to the nightstand next to his bed. 

“Y- You’re good,” Joe gulped, his heart skipping a beat or two while watching you walk around his bedroom in just a towel. 

“I’m almost done and then you can go shower,” you gave him a thumbs up before going back into the bathroom and closing the door again. Joe nodded and then let out the breath he was holding in and cracked his neck, relieving some built-up tension you were creating for him. 

“She’s driving me insane in the best way possible,” Joe thought to himself. You were the only girl who could get him to feel like this, and that should be enough to validate his feelings for you. 

A few minutes later, you came back out in a white short skirt and black tank top, both of which were showing off a little too much skin for Joe’s liking but also making him even more attracted to you than he already was. 

“How do I look?” you asked as you gave him a twirl.

“You look..great,” he smiled (deep down wanting to say that you looked incredibly sexy) as you walked over to your suitcase and pulled out a pair of black-heeled boots. “But don’t you think it’s a little…”.

“Skimpy?” you chuckled. 

“I mean, I guess,” he said while scratching his neck. “It’s just that a lot of dudes around here have wandering eyes and well…”. 

“I’ll be fine. I’ll just pretend you’re my boyfriend,” you stuck your tongue out and teased, his heart stopping for a second because of the word ‘boyfriend’. “Their eyes will be focused on your fists instead of my ass if I call your name,”. 

“That’s…probably true,” he shrugged while he watched you zip your boots up. Nobody wanted to mess with the LSU star quarterback, and surely nobody wanted to mess with his girl. 

“Nice song choice by the way,” you pointed out, humming along to ‘Be My Baby’ by The Ronettes. 

Joe didn’t even realize what song had come on because he was too lost in thought to pay attention to what was going on around him. The fact that the song was about an instant love connection and the girl pining for a particular man was ironic considering it mirrored his situation except the roles were reversed and he was pining for the girl. 

“Our playlist as usual,” he winked, you sent him a warm smile in return. "It's nice to actually listen to it with you here,".

"It doesn't hit the same when we're listening to it alone, does it?" you asked.

"Nope, not even close," he shook his head.

“Check out my new boots,” you said while giving him another twirl, this one was a little unbalanced given that the boots were new and the heel was a little bigger than normal for you. 

“Woah, be careful,” Joe warned as he noticed you almost losing your balance. 

“I’m fineeee,” you twirled again, this time moving closer to Joe who was sitting on the bed. “Shit,” you yelped as the heel got caught in the carpet which caused you to trip, your body crashing down on Joe’s, sending him back against the bed and lying flat with you on top of him. 

“Oops,” you giggled as you lifted your face from Joe’s neck, his arms holding you in place as they were wrapped around your back, your chest pushed up against his, and your legs almost straddling him. 

“See what happens when you wear heels too big?” Joe laughed as he tried to stay calm over the fact that you were on top of him right now. “I thought you would’ve known better considering what happened on your 21st birthday,”.

“Crashed right into the waiter holding a platter filled with shots of Tequila,” you shook your head at the embarrassing memory and looked down on Joe his eyes stuck on your face as if he was lost in thought–which he was.

Once again, Joe was thinking about what he had been wanting to tell you all day. The feeling was only getting stronger as the moments passed by with you, and it was driving him insane. 

“What?” you laughed as you moved his hair out of his eyes, noticing the look in his eyes.

He didn’t say anything and just continued to stare into your eyes, his breathing getting deeper and his heartbeat getting louder. You looked absolutely gorgeous right now and all he wanted to do was kiss your pretty pink lips and forget about everything else around him, but he couldn’t do that until he said those three words to you.

“Joe, what’s wrong?” you said again, this time a little more seriously. 

“Y/N, I-,” he started to say before his phone interrupted you both. 

“I swear to god,” Joe thought to himself as he pulled out his phone from his pocket, his face going from cheery to irritated.

“Who is it?” you asked.

“Justin and Ja’marr. They said they’re hitting up the bar with some friends and asked if we wanted to come with them,” he sighed. 

“But what about dinner? I know you were excited to take me to that new Mexican place,” you pouted. 

“We can go with them if you want. I know you missed seeing everyone and I don’t want to keep you from them. We can grab dinner tomorrow,” he nodded. 

“Are you sure?” you asked as you slowly got off of him and sat down on the bed next to him once he got up. 

“Yeah,” he smiled at you. “I’m just going to take a quick shower and then we can head out,”.

“Okay,” you said while absentmindedly rubbing his hand which sent electric jolts throughout his body. 

He looked down at your hands, you quickly move it away once you realize what you were doing. “S- Sorry,” you blushed, your cheeks heating up as your stomach did a backflip.

“It’s alright,” Joe smiled, placing his hand on yours and giving it a gentle squeeze. 

Joe got up from the bed and grabbed a few things before going into the bathroom, stopping at the sink mirror and staring at himself for a few heartbeats. “Why can’t I just say it,” he whispered to himself.

Were these constant interruptions really from the Universe? It was starting to feel like they were and it was a sign telling him not to tell you, almost like a cue that he should let it happen naturally. 

“Naturally?” Joe whispered to himself. 

“Don’t force it, Joe. If you keep getting interrupted, this might be a sign that you shouldn’t force things between the two of you. This could screw things up with her but if you let everything fall into place on its own you might save this from crashing and burning,” his subconscious mind said. 

Maybe his subconscious mind was right. Maybe he just needed the world to give him the green light. These interruptions were the yellow lights warning him that if he told you how he felt, he might be facing a red light. If you didn’t feel the same way about him your friendship could be ruined and he didn’t ever want that to happen, so waiting might be the best way to go. If you were to bring it up, then he would tell you. But until then, he decided to not mention it again even if it was killing him internally. 

Joe never would have thought a girl could ever drive him so insane. You had the keys to him, the only person who could access his heart and the most intimate parts of him. So much of him depended on you; his happiness, his sanity, his mood. When you smiled, he smiled. When you shined, he shined for you. Your laughter was the best sound he had ever heard and he wanted to hear it for the rest of his life. Every time you talked, he couldn’t focus because all he thought about was how you two should be together. When he sat and watched you break down, he wanted to hold you and tell you that he was never going to leave you like the others did. When you would jump and fall, he wanted you to fall into him. He was all in for you, and he needed you to know it. But maybe the Universe was trying to prevent him from ruining what you two already had. 

Joe looked at himself in the mirror before letting out another exhausted sigh and dropping his face, “What are you doing to me, Y/N,” he whispered to himself before heading into the shower. 

A little later, Joe was freshly showered and had a clear mind for the first time all day and was lacing his shoelaces while you were laser-focused on the episode of SpongeBob that was playing on his TV, almost like you were caught in a trance.

He got up from the bed and grabbed his wallet and phone, slipping both into his pocket before looking over at you. “Y/N, we’re gonna be late,” he softly laughed.

“Shhh, it’s the hash-slinging slasher episode,” you said as you waved him off. 

Joe should have known better to put an episode of SpongeBob on in front of you. You would practically stay glued to the TV until the episode ended, maybe not even getting up after that because you would stay seated for the next episode. This was something you both had in common, no matter how old you two got SpongeBob would be a staple for the two of you. He always admired how you shared some of the same childish interests as him, no other girl being able to match his personality unlike you. 

Joe turned around and grabbed the TV remote, switched the TV off, and then walked in front of the screen and saw your upset face.

“Hey,” you grumbled, crossing your arms like a little child in annoyance. 

“We can finish it later, I promise,” he said, extending his hand out for you to grab and stand up. You stared at him for a few moments, not budging from your seat.

“You know I never break my promises,” Joe lightheartedly added, giving you a charming smile that warms your heart. It was true, he never broke any of the promises he made you. Wether it was sweet and silly like promising to buy you ice cream and call you after his games or serious like promising to never lose the connection you two had once he moved down to Louisiana for football; he always kept them. 

“You do have an excellent track record of living up to your word,” you smiled as you placed your hand in his. 

“And I intend to keep it going,” he said as he pulled you up from the bed.

About 20 minutes later, you made it to the bar and were walking towards the entrance. The loud music vibrated throughout the entire block and the strobe lights peeked through onto the street. “College bars are something else,” you laughed as you looked over at Joe, who was once again seemingly lost in thought. 

“Hey, you alright?” you asked him as you stopped walking, Joe not noticing until a few seconds later and then backtracking to you.

“Yeah, I’m good,” he nodded, his tone and demeanor not reassuring you that he was. 

“Joe, I know you too well to know when something is bugging you. You’ve been lost in a trance at least 4 times today and that’s way more than usual for you,” you said.

“She noticed? She noticed me lost in thought because I was thinking about her?” he thought to himself. 

“Are you bored? Am I boring you?” you giggled. 

“No, No. God, No,” he quickly shut that thought down. 

“Then what is it?” you questioned. 

“It’s nothing,” he brushed off, his secretiveness not sitting well with you. 

“Wait. You’ve been wanting to talk to me about something all day but we kept getting interrupted,” you said as you looked up at him. 

“Yeah..” he slowly nodded, his heartbeat picking up again because of where this was going.

“That’s what’s bothering you, Obviously,” you realized as you smacked your head. “And I kept forgetting that you needed to talk,”.

“It’s not a big deal Y/N,” he nervously laughed as he glanced around and refused to meet your eyes.

“Uhh, yes it is,” you said, moving your head so that his eyes met yours. “We always talk about important things with each other and I don’t want that to stop because of silly interruptions. So before we go with the others and end up getting super trashed and wasted, we should talk. What was it? What did you want to talk about all day?” you said while staring deeply into his eyes which looked like they were hiding something. 

Joe paused for a few seconds, his brain freezing just like his face. This was it. This was his chance to tell you what he had been feeling for years. He could finally tell you how much he liked you which was way more than the normal amount. You were it for him, and now he finally got you alone to tell you.

“This is it, Joe. This is what you’ve been waiting for. Tell her how much you like her and get your girl,” his mind was saying. “This is the universe letting it happen naturally. She brought it up this time, not you,”. 

“I-.....” he opened up his mouth, nothing coming out. 

“What is it?” you nervously chuckled while brushing your fingers over his hand. 

He paused for a few seconds, his heartbreaking before the words came out of his mouth. 

This time instead of his mind and subconscious, his heart spoke up. “It’s not the time,”.

“Never mind,” he forcefully smiled. “It’s not important,”. 

End of flashback 

It was so hard for him to say it to you back then but now it was like a reflex, he almost had a hard time stopping himself from saying it. 

“I love our life,” you giggled as you felt Joe smother you with kisses. 

“And I love you,” he smiled against your cheek. “More than anything in the world,”.

“Even more than you love Pumpkin Pie?”.

“Even more than I love Pumpkin Pie, my Looney Tunes sweatshirt, my gray jeans, and Football,” he said while giving you a loving squeeze.

“Wow, that’s a lot of love,” you raised your eyebrows. All 4 of those are things Joe couldn’t live without.  

“You sound surprised,” Joe laughed. “You’ve had me down bad for you since the first time I saw you,”. 

“Shut up,” you laughed as you turned your head to kiss his cheeks which were turning a little pink because of the cold weather.  “You should probably be getting ready to go to the team hotel,” you said as you looked down at your watch. 

“Mmmm,” he whined as he pulled you closer.

“I know, I know. But they’re going to send out a search party if you don’t make report time,” you giggled as you gently got out of his embrace and stood up, reaching out and pulling him up. “And I should probably head back to my place and get some sleep for tomorrow,”.

Joe looked up at you like you had two heads, the look on his face matching how he felt. “Back to your place? Just stay here,”. 

“At your house? Alone?” you questioned. You hadn’t stayed over at Joe’s place alone before, and truth be told it felt a little weird being there all by yourself even though you were literally moving in with him next month. 

“Correction, our house. And yeah, you’re moving in next month so why not?” he said as he reached out for your hand, helping you up the rocks and back to the trail where the golf cart was parked. It was weird for him to refer to his house as your house as well, the thought not registering in your brain yet.  

“It’s so weird to hear that,” you laughed. 

“Why? Am I that terrible to live with,” Joe said as he slid into the driver's seat.

“The worst,” you grumbled, sliding into the seat next to him with a cheeky grin on your face. 

“Ha Ha, very funny,” he said in the most monotone voice possible. 

“I’m just messing with you,” you said while running your fingers along his arm. “It’s just weird because I would have never expected to hear those words..our house,” you said. “It’s like a fairytale,” you said as you looked at the growing smile on Joe’s face, the smile that would take you to another planet. 

“Things change pretty quickly, don’t they?” he said as he glanced at you. 

“Very quickly,” you said as you leaned your head against his shoulder as he turned on the golf cart and started driving you both back up to the house. “But I'm also very glad they did,”.

“Me too,” he grinned. Joe was truly the happiest he’d ever been in his life at this moment, and it was all because of you. 

A Half-Hour Later 

“Did you get everything you need?” you asked Joe as you spun around on the kitchen barstool you were seated on. 

“Yeah, but I’m still going to come by tomorrow morning so I don’t have a ton to take with me right now,” he smiled as he placed his duffle bag down. 

“You’re not going straight to the stadium?” you asked as you took a bite of the brownies you had made earlier. 

“Nah. I’m gonna come by and then we can drive over together,” he smiled while walking over and grabbing a brownie from the pan. 

“Hmm, I don’t think you’re supposed to be eating that right now,” you said, grabbing his wrist. 

“One brownie won’t hurt,” Joe said, transferring the brownie to his other hand and taking a bite.

“Sweet treats can wait until after the game tomorrow,” you shook your head.

“Oh, trust me. I’ll be getting a sweet treat then too,” he winked at you before moving over to grab his water bottle from the counter.

“Focus, Joe. Focus,” you laughed as you placed your elbows on the kitchen island and your face in your hands, intensely staring at your boyfriend's muscular arms and then his dirty blonde curls that were being controlled by his backward cap.

“What’re you looking at?” Joe asked as he caught your gaze on him.  

“Just admiring you, like usual,” you smiled. 

“Admiring anything in particular?” he asked, placing his elbows down and mirroring your position. 

“Hmm, just your deliciously impressive biceps and your easily pullable hair,” you said as you gave him a heated look. 

“I should get going before this ends up going somewhere else,” he said as he stood up straight. 

“Probably a good idea,” you grinned as you slid off the barstool and walked over to the fridge, pulling out a container of some pumpkin bites you made with the brownies earlier.

“I thought you said no sweet treats?” he said while examining the continents of the container. 

“Well, there’s always a loophole for everything,” you shrugged. “These are healthy pumpkin energy bites. All the goodness of normal pumpkin bites but with healthier add-ins and ingredients,”. 

“You made these just for me?” he grinned as he took the box over to his duffle bag, then carefully placed it inside.

“Mhmmm,” you skip over to him and say. “You can eat them tonight or tomorrow morning. Up to you,”.

“Thank youu,” he said, grabbing your wrist and quickly pulling you into him causing you to bump your head against his chest.

“Mm, Hi,” you quietly laughed as you loop your arms around his neck and look up at him, his arms settling around your lower back with his hands firmly placed on your butt. 

“Hi,” he grinned while nuzzling his nose against yours before leaning in to kiss you, both of you relishing the taste of the chocolate from the brownies on each other’s lips. The kiss quickly became more intense as his hands started sliding up and down your body and the heat between you two increased from how close your bodies were to each other.

“Okay,” you panted while pulling away from the kiss, a dazed smile on your face.

“Focus. We need to focus,” he cutely nodded. 

“I gotta get you out of here,” you laughed while stuffing your face into his neck. 

“I’ll get myself out of here. No need to lift a finger,” he smiled while pressing a kiss to your head. “You just stay here and be Queen of the house,”.

“Bow to my throne you worthless peasant,” you teased in a silly voice.

“Damn, it’s already going to your head,” he raised his eyebrows. 

“I’ll have a crown and a butler by the time you’re back tomorrow morning,” you winked. 

“Okay,” he laughed. “But seriously, act like the Queen. Make yourself at home, this is all yours just as much as it is mine. You can go in any room, sit anywhere, re-arrange my things, do whatever. It’s all yours,”.

“So you don’t care if I sit naked in your office and re-watch hours of game tape of you looking sexy as hell while throwing a football?” you joked while wiggling your eyebrows.

“Nope,” he smiled. “Well, I do care about the naked in my office part. Maybe sit in there fully clothed and then we can do the naked bit after the game if you really want to,” he whispered in your ear. 

“You’re crazy,” you giggled as you looked lovingly into his starry blue eyes.

“Crazy about you,” he said before sealing the statement with a kiss. 

After a few more minutes of kissing and teasing each other, you were standing at the doorstep of the Garage and watching Joe put his stuff into the car. “Remember, call me if you need anything,” he said while opening the driver’s side door. 

“I will,” you smiled. 

“Okay,” he sighed as he quickly jogged over to you. “I’ll see you tomorrow morning. I love you,” he said before pressing a final kiss to your lips.

“I love you, my perfect boyfriend,” you said while pecking his lips and ruffling his hair.

You watched as he got into the car and backed out of the garage, then gave you a quick wave before closing it and driving off. You turned around and closed the door behind you, letting out a deep breath as you looked around the quiet house, a smile forming on your face once you realized that this was your house now too. You loved this house, you loved your life, and you loved Joe, you just loved everything. There was so much love inside of you for the first time in a long time, and Joe was the one who brought it out. 

An hour later 

You took a quick shower in Joe’s bathroom (now your’s as well) and were now inside the massive closet, searching for another comfy sweatshirt of his to steal. “Hmm, this one should do,” you giggled as you pulled out another one of his many Bengals hoodies and slipped it on, his scent still lingering on the fabric. “Mmm,” you hummed as you brought the collar to your nose.

You were about to walk out of the closet before something caught your eye in the corner, your curiosity spiking as you walked closer to the little stand that he used to keep his cufflinks for his suits, but that wasn’t what caught your eye. What caught your eye were the photos taped to the wall above the stand.

There were 3 photobooth film strips taped to the wall, all of which were of you and Joe. 

“He’s such a teenage girl,” you giggled to yourself as you ran your fingers along the strips. The first one was from when you both went and saw Avengers Infinity War at the movie theater on opening night together back during your Ohio State days–both of you were raging Marvel nerds. The second one was from the Bengals pre-season party from last year–another event he brought you to before you were dating. Both of the photo strips were tied to sweet and flavorful memories until your eyes went to the third photo strip. 

This one was from LSU.

Flashback to 2019 – LSU

“..He told me he loved me, and I thought he m- meant it,” you cried into Joe’s chest. “ Am- Am I not enough?” your voice cracked as the tears fell harder. 

“Y/N you are enough, don’t ever say that,” Joe said as he rubbed your back, pulling you in tighter as you were both sitting on the curb of the parking lot.

“Then why did he go to her? Why did he feel the need to-,” you sobbed, your eyes burning from the amount of tears that were pouring out from your eyes. “As soon as I leave, he goes to her,”. 

You were currently visiting Joe at LSU during your Spring Break and he had brought you to Snappy’s Arcade tonight which was one of his favorite places to go around town. You spent some time playing air hockey and skeeball, shooting some hoops, playing all the old classic arcade games, and even winning a few prizes along the way. You both hit the photo booth per Joe’s request as well, making countless silly poses and memories that would last a lifetime not only in picture form but also in your hearts. You always had the most fun when you were with Joe, all of your worries instantly disappearing once you heard his adorable laughter and saw his comforting smile. Everything was going great until you looked at your phone which was blowing up with messages from your friends, messages you wished you had never read. 

“It’s like he was planning it. The second I’m 14 hours away he pretends like he doesn’t have a girlfriend, washes everything we’d built over the past year down the drain, and goes and does that with her? Knowing how hard it took me to open up to him in the first place because of what happened last time,” you sputtered. “And it’s even more fucked up because he knew how excited I was to come down here and see you,”.

“Y/N…,” Joe said, his heart hurting as you cried harder into his chest. 

“It’s not enough. It’s never enough,” you interrupted, your body shaking as a result of the plethora of emotions you were feeling. “I’m never enough, not for anyone,”. 

Joe felt his heart sink seeing you like this, especially because of a guy. You didn’t deserve to feel like this; unwanted, unloved, not enough. He wanted to mend your broken heart by telling you how extraordinary you were and how you had someone in your life who loved you beyond words and could give you the same love you gave others, but he just couldn’t get himself to tell you the second part—not now. But he could tell you the first. 

“Hey, look at me,” he said as he cupped your cheek and lifted your head to meet his soft eyes. “You’re so much more than you think you are. Don’t ever let anyone make you feel like you’re not enough. You’re one of the most loving and special people I’ve ever known and you deserve to be treated the same way you treat others, with limitless love. If Ryan can’t do that for you, then screw him,” Joe said as he rubbed your back again to calm you down. 

“Y/N, you deserve the world and more. You’re going to find someone that can give it to you, I promise,” Joe said as he gazed deeply into your red eyes, telling you the same thing you told him a few years ago on that beach. He wanted to be the one that gave you the world, so badly. 

“You’re literally anyone’s dream girl. You’re kind, funny, selfless, beautiful, and can hold a conversation about anything from which flavor of Gatorade is the best to a conversation about Socrates, Plato, Aristotle, and Epistemology. You’re nerdy as hell but you're also the most football-involved girl I know, which shocked me when we first met considering most girls I know just like football for the eye candy. Anyway, you’ve got the looks, you’ve got the brain, you’ve got the personality, but most importantly you’ve got what’s in there.” he said as he pointed to your heart. “You have so much love inside of you. So much love to offer and show the world. You have it all. You’re more than enough,” he said. 

You looked into his deep blue eyes and could tell his words were genuine, he meant everything he said to you. His eyes always had a way of telling you things he couldn’t say with his mouth, and right now they were telling you many things. “Thank you,” you said as you stuffed your head back into his chest. “I swear you always know exactly what to say to me when I’m upset about something. It’s like you’re incapable of saying the wrong things, I don’t know what I’d do without you,”.

“You won’t have to worry about that. I’m always going to be in your corner,” he smiled as he moved you closer to him, both of you sitting on the curb in silence and just enjoying each other's warmth; his gentle touch soothing your worries. 

“Fruit Punch is the best by the way,” you spoke up a few moments later as you looked up at him.

“Hm?” he asked, a little confused by what you were talking about.

“Gatorade. Fruit Punch is the best,” you giggled.

“You’re insane. It’s obviously Lemon-Lime,” he shook his head as you laughed underneath him, the smile he loved to see coming back onto your face as your tears dried up. 

End of flashback 

You smiled at the end of the bittersweet memory, the one that would normally leave a sour taste in your mouth but didn’t because of Joe. He told you that you’d find someone who could give you the world, and he promised you this.

One thing about Joe, he always kept his promises. 

The person who could give you the world was under your nose the entire time and you had no idea. He was the one that wiped your tears every time you cried, he was the one that made you laugh until your stomach hurt, he was the one that always thought about you, he was the one that truly loved you. He promised you that you’d find that person who could give you the world, and you did.

Joe was the one that could give you the world.

—To be continued—

[bvidzsoo]

Love Me Like A Rockstar (13)

ー☆ Chapter 13: You Know Me Too Well

Author: bvidzsoo

Pairing: Song Mingi x female reader

ー☆ Warning: cursing, usage of the word 'bitch' ー☆ Word count: 6.5k ー☆ Genre: university!au, enemies to lovers!au, rockstar!au ー☆ Rating: sfw ー☆ Summary: Love. You wanted none of it. You had already been heartbroken very badly once, you didn't wish to go through that ever again. But the Universe works in intricate ways and, somehow, you found yourself webbed up in a local rockstar's life, Song Mingi. He was everything you expected him to be, yet nothing like you imagined him he would be. What happens when you find mutual understanding and have heartful conversations? Will he be able to break down your walls? Will you be able to chase away his darkness?

A/N: Well, well, lovelies...new chapter is up and maybe I'm kind of kicking my feet??? Who knows, we'll see what y'all think of this chapter hehe. Also, happy birthday to Song Mingi?! I actually didn't mean to post the new chapter today, but today was the only day I had enough time to write it sooo, yeah. Tmi, but MC's mother is exactly like my mom, so maybe I drew inspiration from real life lol, I love her to death but sometimes I really wish SHE DIDNT SPEAK lol. Also, I'm so obsessed with today's song for the chapter; I'm screaming, crying, throwing up over it LOL. Just a heads up, next chapter is the last like actual chapter of the series and then I decided to add an epilogue lol cue the sobbing. As per usual, listen to You Know Me Too Well before or while reading the chapter! I hope you enjoy and let me know through feedback hehe <3 Enjoy your weekends! divider

Taglist: @orshii @or5i @lovely-red2 @scarfac3 @juicy-red

@sunaswifes-blog @voicesinmyhead-rc @teez-the-time @maru-matt @kyeos4ng

@deathbyyeekies @chicksmoothie @mjlbn01 @xhexy @tmtxtf

@hwashiningstar @thatfavouritesong @ateez-atiny380 @xciiiomwliah @vixensss

@catchingskzzzs @tesssaurrr @ginger-mingi @mingisbbg

⟨Series M.list ↭ Previous Chapter⟩

♫Playlist♫

            Saturday (2:55 pm)

Me: mingi can we talk?

Saturday (8:30 pm)

Me: i am free whenever you say so just let me know and i’ll be there

            Sunday (9:15 am)

Me: we need to talk, mingi.

            Sunday (12:08 am)

Me: please hear me out im sorry

Monday (current time)

            “Do you think he’ll slam the door in my face?” The hallways were buzzing with life as I tried to veer my way around the crowd of students without running into anyone. Today, out of all days, I just so happened to have my last class of the day in a completely different building and at least a good five-minute walk away from the arts building.

“It’s what you’d deserve, to be fair, but—” The was a gasp on the other side of the phone and my eyebrows furrowed as Seulgi muttered something to someone, muffled, “sorry, Wooyoung almost dropped my mother’s favorite vase, I told him to take off that blindfold.”

Eyebrows furrowing even deeper, I abruptly stopped walking, making a girl give me a heated glare that I didn’t care for, “Why is he blindfolded? Wait! I actually don’t want to know.”

“We were playing hide and seek with his niece, you idiot, but I got bored and sneaked away when I saw you calling.” Seulgi’s voice was exasperated and I chuckled as I took off again, leaving the science major’s building as I nuzzled further into my thick scarf. Some days it was warmer, but most days it got really cold and I hated it. I couldn’t deal with the freezing weather, perhaps it was my biggest enemy after Jeong Yunho, “Anyways, as I was saying, you deserve to be ignored by Mingi, but knowing how big of a sucker he is for you, he’ll probably give in before you can utter a single word.”

My heart jumped at the thought as I gnawed on my bottom lip, cutting off the path as I hurried through the grass, uncaring that I was probably destroying the work of the gardener. Besides, the grass had barely just started growing out again, it would be fine, “You think so?”

“I know so.” I heard Wooyoung’s high-pitched voice shouting from the distance and my eyebrows furrowed as I realized Seulgi had probably put me on speaker. Now that was a bit awkward, “He’s an idiot, but he’s in love. Now that I come to think of it, you two are a lot alike, two idiots in love—”

“I believe your niece is looking for you, babe.” Seulgi cut her boyfriend off and I was thankful because I don’t think I could’ve handled hearing him say the words ‘in love’ again. That was scary, even just the thought of it. I was barely coming to terms with liking Mingi, but hearing the word love sort of made me want to turn back around and abandon my whole plan of trying to make peace between the two of us. And Seulgi knew this, thankfully, because she didn’t say anything about it again, “Are you on your way to his studio right now?”

I hummed and curled my fingers tighter around the thermos bottle, my nose cold from the weather as the arts building finally came into sight, “Yeah, three minutes and I’m there.”

“Good.” Seulgi sounded content and I sighed as I tried to ignore the dawning anxiety that tried to crawl through my body and make me abandon my well-thought-out plan. I had to do this. Seulgi and my mom were right, I couldn’t mess this up again. I liked Mingi, a lot. He is a good guy and I shouldn’t let my past and my fears dictate my life. Yes, Mingi is Yunho’s best friend, but Mingi isn’t like Yunho. Hopefully, “Update me later then, I love you Y/N, I hope you know that.”

I chuckled and nodded at the security guard as he was out of his cubicle, standing at the bottom of the steps, smoking his cigar, “I know, thank you for knocking some sense into me.”

“We’ll see about that later.” Her snort was amused and I shook my head as we said our goodbyes, the warmth of the building making me sigh out in relief as I entered through the front doors. I pocketed my phone and unwrapped my scarf from around my neck, greeting the familiar people I crossed paths with. I would be lying if I said I wasn’t feeling nervous at all, after all, I didn’t know how Mingi would react. If he was anything like me, he wouldn’t forgive me so easily. Not when I’ve hurt him again and in the worst way possible.

As I ascended the marble stairs, I found stability in the thermos bottle clutched firmly in both of my hands now, its weight helping me to keep my determination and focus on going through with my own plan. When I woke this morning and went to take a quick shower, I was surprised to hear my mother’s singing and smell the delicious waft of pancakes, making my stomach growl loudly as I didn’t have dinner the night before. It seemed like my mother had taken a day off, grumbling something about her deserving a day to rest after she was almost choked out by one of her mentally ill patients. I couldn’t help but agree with her as we sat at the table in silence, enjoying our breakfast, that is until she cleared her throat loudly and stood up, fetching a mug and a cup from the counter next to the sink. I froze when I realized she was handing me the cup Mingi had designed with funny looking chicks on it, and I was even more confused when I realized it wasn’t coffee I was drinking, but hot chocolate.

“So, what are you going to do about that handsome fella?” I tried not to groan or regret the fact that I told her everything about Mingi. I took a tentative sip of the hot chocolate and realized it wasn’t hot before taking a bigger gulp as I enjoyed its sweet taste.

“I’ll talk to him today—”

“Great!” My mother didn’t even let me finish as she sprung up from her seat again to fetch something from a cupboard, “It’s amazing how strong our maternal intuition is, I swear my starlight, you should make some babies soon.”

“Mom.” I groaned as I watched her curiously as she took a blue thermos bottle from the cupboard and filled it with hot chocolate from the kettle, “We’ve had this discussion many times before, I’m not having children so young.”

“You’re not that young though.” She sent me a sheepish smile as my eyes widened, feigning hurt.

“I’m turning twenty-three?! How is that not young?” She cleared her throat as she sealed the thermos and walked back to the table to sit down.

“I’m just trying to inspire you, anyways,” She huffed and then placed the thermos on the table and pushed it towards me, “Bring this to him as peace offering, he’ll love it. Trust me.”

“I don’t think what Mingi needs right now is hot chocolate—”

“Finish your breakfast and shut up.” My mother didn’t let me finish as she cut off a thick part of the pancake with her fork and forced it inside my mouth, making me groan, “Mothers know best when it comes to stuff like this, be thankful I’m saving your relationship and be back before lunch. I’m ordering take out, and I certainly am not waiting for late your ass if I’m hungry.”

I knew fighting my mom was fruitless, so I just grumbled an okay as I tried to chew the pancake she had forced in my mouth, my cheeks all puffed out. My mother seemed content that I finally wasn’t talking back to her and I shook my head as I pulled the thermos bottle towards me, reminded of the time when Mingi had brought me tea knowing that I would be feeling probably a little sick after getting all soaked in the cold rain and harsh wind.

So, now, with Mingi’s clothes in my tote bag and the thermos filled with hot chocolate in my hands, I couldn’t help but feel optimistic despite the anxiety gripping at my thoughts. If my mother, Seulgi, and even Wooyoung—who knew Mingi like the back of his hand—were convinced that everything would work out just fine, then why would I not believe that? Sure, Mingi was probably still annoyed at me, but I didn’t think a few apologies and even more explanations couldn’t fix the issue at hand. All I had to do was be honest and come clean with my feelings and he’d probably do the same and then—that’s where anxiety stepped in. Then what? Was I ready to pursue a relationship? Did Mingi want to date me? Did I want to date him? Why did it have to be Jeong Yunho’s best friend I was into? Why could I not move past my fears and stop associating Mingi with everything I was wounded by, when he never once made me feel like Yunho did? I could dwell on these thoughts for an eternity, I fear, but I didn’t have that time right now. And to be fair, I didn’t want to think of such things right now because I could feel my determination wither the closer I got to the music majors’ floor, heartbeat loud in my ears.

I stopped at the end of the hallway and took a deep breath, eyes settling on the studio I knew now was used by Mingi only. Wooyoung was nice enough to tell me the number of his studio—not that I had forgotten since the last time I was here—and he also let me know that it was used by Mingi only, the teachers having granted him full access, even at hours when students were supposed to be at home. It seems so Mingi was a favorite amongst the teachers, and I could see why. He was diligent and hard-working; his lyrics were beautiful and nothing would stop him from fulfilling his dream of becoming a well-known rockstar. I couldn’t help but feel excited at the prospect of that, and hoped that I would be part of his journey, that he’d let me back into his life.

Steeling my nerves and trying to see the light at the end of the tunnel, I knew there was no turning back. I wanted to do this, I had to do this. I had to stop sabotaging myself, and so, I marched down the hallway towards Mingi’s studio with a newfound hope and determination. Which lasted about five seconds as I came face to face with Mingi’s studio door. There was a small window on it, which would let you know whether the room was occupied or not, and it was straight across the desk where he was sat at—with the blonde girl standing right next to him. And that should have been okay, because really, Mingi could talk to whoever and spend his time also with whoever he pleased. And it’s not like I didn’t have male friends—I didn’t, Seulgi was my only friend—it’s not like he couldn’t speak to one of his fans. After all, he’s made it clear she was nothing more than a fan he appreciated for helping spread the word about his band.

But then, why was her hand on his shoulder one second and the next second slowly trailing down the sleeve of his beige cardigan—which looked like it was messily stained with paint—and certainly the way my good disposal dissipated and was overtaken by blind jealousy and rage had nothing to do with the sudden possessiveness that shook me to my core. And perhaps the thing that bothered me the most wasn’t even her feeling up Mingi’s arm as she looked down at him with sultry eyes, perhaps it was the way Mingi leaned back in his chairs, legs spread wide, and smirk on his lips as he looked up at her with his sharp gaze, allowing her to touch him. Perhaps that’s what sent me over the edge as I barged inside the studio in the most unceremonious way, making the girl yelp in fright and Mingi flinch as his eyes widened.

『Baby, you're all that I want

I want you all to myself

Oh, but you know me too well』

And when I was angry—or panicking, or hurt—all rational thoughts flew out the window as I was led by nothing else but pure instinct and a shit ton of unclear and not so necessarily nice thoughts. Simpler put, I wasn’t thinking nor making sense, but I couldn’t care less as I glared at the both of them while I struggled to mask the fury licking at my veins. They were both looking at me wide eyed, as if I had caught them doing something I wasn’t supposed to, and that made me snap before I could think through how to proceed with this whole shitshow, “Get out.”

For a second, even I didn’t recognize my voice as it dropped a few octaves, fierce gaze set on the blonde girl as she paled, eyes scrambling between Mingi and me as, suddenly, Mingi seemed to snap out of whatever scare I had given him by slamming his door open and into the wall. God, I hope I haven’t actually damaged it, because I certainly didn’t have the money to pay for it right now. I couldn’t look at the blonde girl anymore, heart beating fast in my chest as Mingi and I made eye contact, his eyebrows set in a deep frown as he had a sneer on his face.

“Excuse me?” God, even her voice was annoying. I looked back at the blonde girl and raised my eyebrows at her mockingly.

“Are you deaf?” I chuckled, but it was humorless, “Do I need to repeat myself?”

She huffed, looking offended—rightfully so—and I gritted my teeth as I stepped inside the studio, making it pretty obvious that I wasn’t going anywhere before this bitch left. I tried not to see red as Mingi’s hands balled up into fists or the way the girl snickered, crossing her arms in front of her chest.

“You’re the one that’s barged inside uninvited, sweetheart,” And if I could have, I would have ripped her blonde strands out, “this isn’t your fucking studio, so, shut up. Mingi wants me here, maybe you should leave.”

I bit my bottom lip to stop myself from laughing, somewhere deep in my mind realizing I looked absolutely psychotic and if Mingi didn’t hate me before, he certainly would hate me now. I wasn’t helping myself; I was making everything worse—just the usual, then. But this bitch wasn’t stopping me from getting what I came here for, and I hummed as my eyes fell on Mingi again, who’s jaw was clenching and unclenching. His sharp eyes were narrowed, but it seemed like he wasn’t saying anything anytime soon and that only pissed me off more.

“Sure,” I nodded and walked further inside, forcefully throwing my tote bag on the small couch against the wall on my left, making the contents of it spill out. I watched as both Mingi and the girl looked at the clothes, and Mingi’s expression flashed with something unreadable for a second, “Mingi wants you here.”

I suppose neither expected me not to stop until I reached the desk, coming up on Mingi’s left side as I slammed the thermos bottle—albeit too harshly—against the desk, a loud bang echoing in the room. Mingi’s eyebrows furrowed as I opened my mouth to tell the girl to leave again, but suddenly, he was up on his feet, staring me down. The height difference wasn’t that great between the two of us, but suddenly I felt small under his heated glare and sneer that seemed to settle on his lips, broad shoulders intimidating as he lowered his head just a little bit. He looked nothing like the Mingi I had gotten to know over the past few months, and it made my heart race as I realized I might not be able to reason with him today, “What the fuck is your problem, Y/N?! You tell her to get out when you barge in unwelcomed, and then start demanding for her to leave—”

I couldn’t even let him finish his sentence before I was firing back my argument, “Oh, what’s my fucking problem?! Maybe the fact that you lied to me?”

“About what?!” Mingi snapped, eyebrows furrowed as he took a step towards me, his body big enough to make the blonde girl not be seen behind him.

“Oh, be for real.” I scoffed and rolled my eyes, “You never show anyone your songs to? But you so conveniently let me listen to that unfinished song of yours and now look who else gets to listen to it? Her. If you’re so desperate to get laid, you should have—”

“I didn’t show her shit.” Mingi cut me off, voice shaking as his cheeks grew red from anger, probably. Mingi wasn’t a scary person, but he looked scary right now. There was no ounce of kindness in his expression nor tone, he looked cold and angry and like he hated me. I gulped and realized, once again, that I was digging myself deeper into the shithole I had created for myself, that I was hurting him again and again. This is not how things were supposed to go, “I only showed you. That unfinished song you’re talking about, only you know about it. Thanks for reminding me again why I shouldn’t deal with you anymore—”

“Stop it.” I snapped, eyebrows furrowing as I felt fear grip at my throat, making my voice sound shaky as Mingi’s expression went blank. I hated when he did that. I wanted to know what he was thinking about, I needed to see what he felt. I couldn’t do this if he withdrew himself, I couldn’t do this if I was the only one that would bare her heart to him. I was scared. He was pushing me away like Yunho had done, Mingi was abandoning me.

“Stop it?” If I wanted to cry when he laughed in my face mockingly, impassive smirk settling on his lips, I didn’t let it happen. I kept my composure, anger, hurt, desperation, yearning all mixing together as I found it harder and harder to breathe, “You want me to be nice to you after all the shit you said to me on Saturday? You want me to treat you like before after everything that’s happened? I can’t. You hurt me, made me feel like a fucking idiot, Y/N, you broke—I thought we were friends. I feel disrespected and played, and yet here you are again, acting like you have even an ounce of right to act the way you are right now, when it’s you who made it so fucking clear you want nothing to do with me anymore. Do you enjoy making others suffer? Do you want to see me on my fucking knees begging for your attention? I have enough self-respect to step back and move on with my life when someone so blatantly tells it to my face that I am nothing—”

“But you aren’t!” My tone raised without me meaning to as my heart continued to beat out of my chest so fast my ears started ringing. I felt tears prick at my eyes, but I didn’t want to cry. I didn’t want to victimize myself, I just wanted Mingi to understand I made a mistake, that I knew I did, and that I was trying to fix things. I didn’t want us to part ways, especially not like this, he made me realize this second that I didn’t want to lose him, “You aren’t nothing to me. I said those things because I’m scared. I don’t know how to navigate these feelings—”

“Save it, okay?” I was left gaping as Mingi shook his head, pushing his hands in the pockets of his light denim jeans, “I don’t want to hear whatever sob shit you have to say right now, I’m asking you kindly to leave before I call security and delete my number, like I have deleted yours.”

The silence that settled upon us was deafening and my eyebrows furrowed as a tear rolled down my cheek without warning, my chest rising and falling rapidly as I tried to find my breath. That hurt, it hurt more than anything before, it hurt more than when Yunho left me, broke my heart. Mingi meant so much more to me than Yunho ever did, and I bit my lower lip as Mingi seemed unaffected, expression blank and rather bored. Nothing was making sense anymore. I was scared, but I also felt ready to break free of the chains of the past, I wanted Mingi. And knowing all this, I didn’t want to hold back anymore, I didn’t want to consider my next words anymore. I just wanted to speak my mind freely.

“My ex-boyfriend is Jeong Yunho, your best friend.” Mingi had almost turned away from me, but he froze, head slowly turning back to face me once again, “We dated back in high school, many years ago, when we were still some headless and stupid teenagers. But he was the first boy I’ve ever loved and he fucking broke my heart, shattered into pieces with a bright smile on his lips. He promised me many things, and I was naïve, so I believed it all. And because I did, I ended up hurt beyond fixing and I’ve never trusted a man again. He was my first boyfriend and the center of my universe, yet he never cared enough about me to properly break up with me.

“Yunho talked about you all the time. Everything you liked, everything you hated, you were part of our daily conversations and I always wished to meet you, to see what was so great in you that had Yunho gushing all the time. I was jealous, so jealous that I became bitter. I started hating even the mention of your name, I selfishly wanted Yunho to myself, and you gone from his life. I couldn’t understand what was so great about you and why I wasn’t enough. I knew Yunho didn’t love me, but I wanted him to, so I made myself believe it, believe that I was worth more to him than you’ll ever be. And in the process, I stupidly made myself believe that he’d never leave me, that he was the one for me like he has said so many times before.

“He broke my heart so fucking bad that it took years until I could say his name or even see his face again. I am over him now, have been for a long time, but I can’t help still feel bitter about him. I can’t help but associate you with him at times. He made me defensive and untrusting of men, I couldn’t help but assume you’d be just like Yunho when I first met you, at least when I finally realized who you were. I felt so guilty, I tried to push you away but you wouldn’t fucking give up. You are everything yet nothing like Yunho and that scares me, because I want you, Mingi. But I’m scared you’ll abandon me like Yunho did, that you’ll fill my head with empty and pretty fantasies and then leave me alone with them, tearing my heart apart in the process. I want to open up, but I’m scared. I think, however, with you by my side, I’d be able to do that, to let my walls down.”

The silence that settled upon us, once again, was deafening and I gulped, heart racing and making me feel lightheaded as Mingi’s face had fallen, expression finally not as void as before. He looked shocked, but surprisingly, he didn’t look hurt nor like he would hate me for ever. It made me hopeful for a second, it made me sniff loudly and blink away the insisting tears from my eyes. He gulped and took a deep breath, making me stare in his eyes, hopeful and less scared, as he sighed and rubbed at his chin; a stubble was showing. Now that I come to think of it, he looks rather tired with bags under his eyes, and his platinum hair has a blue hue to it.

“I’m sorry he made you go through so much; I know it wasn’t easy.” Mingi’s tone finally lost the edge it had before, finally it wasn’t laced with so much anger, and it almost made me cry, “I kind of—I knew. Not exactly the whole thing, but I suppose I can say I had a feeling that there was history between you and Yunho. It was too obvious whenever I brought him up that you didn’t like him, at first I was confused, but then I suppose everything just clicked into place. The drawing of his eyes, the sweater you lent me and the fact that you gave it to me in the end—I’ve known since then that it was probably Yunho. I never said anything to him, not like that at least, I wanted you to come to me on your own, when you fully trusted me with the information. And I’m sorry, but he—he was an asshole back in high school, he was insecure and he played with everyone’s feelings, he was quite good at manipulating people around him. He’s mentioned dating you, but very few times, and by the time you had broken up I had all but forgotten about you, I suppose I wasn’t much better compared to him.

“But all of this isn’t my fault in the end, and while I completely understand your reasoning now and why you often acted the way you did, I’m sorry, but I can’t just let go of things and start anew. There’s just—too many things that have happened, emotions that you stirred up in me, and I just can’t do it, I—it’s not even about you and Yunho, I don’t give a fuck about it, it was ages ago and Yunho is a changed man and I know he’s long moved on. And you too, I believe you have, you seemed less bitter lately, but I just can’t. I can’t help but ask again, what do you want, YN?”

At least he wasn’t mad at me, but I did feel ashamed that I made him piece everything together on his own, that I wasn’t capable of telling him the truth myself. I have made mistakes, sure, but Mingi apparently didn’t hate me for them, “I just want to apologize, for everything.”

Mingi nodded and I watched in despair as that cold mask slipped back onto his face, expression void of any emotion once again. It made me want to grab his shoulders and shake them, force him to look deep into my eyes and just see everything I felt for him, “That’s fine, I accept your apology. If that’s all, you can leave—”

“But that’s not all!” I snapped, having had enough of being dismissed by him. I saw the way his jaw twitched, the way his eyebrows furrowed at my defiance, at my reluctance to leave just yet. I was being pathetic and a pain in the ass, but I had to make him understand that I was ready to leave all my fears behind for him, to learn how to be a better person next to him. I wanted to change, and I wanted it to happen with him by my side, with him guiding me and teaching me how to be more like him, and less like the shitty person I was for so long. I longed to be the way I was before meeting Yunho, a lot happier and a lot less broody and hateful of the beautiful things that surrounded me, “Mingi, I cannot stop thinking about you. I spend every waking moment when we’re apart wondering what you’re up to, what’s going through your mind, whether you’re okay or not. And I’ve been drawing you, since the first time I saw you, you’ve captured my attention, you’ve made me curious of who you were the longer we spent time together. I don’t want to be like this anymore, I don’t want to hurt you anymore and shut you out, I want to fix everything. I want to—I just want you, Mingi.”

There was a quiet scoff behind Mingi, but neither one of us reacted to it as our gazes bore into each other, my eyes glinting with yearning and his façade slowly breaking down as he released a shaky breath, “Mingi, I adore you.”

“Get out.” For a second, my body froze as I thought he was addressing me, but then, he whirled around and pointed towards the studio’s still open door, “Get out, now.”

And I just realized that the blonde girl had been witness to everything, and I couldn’t help but blanch in embarrassment as she made to interject, but I guess Mingi’s sharp eyes made her reconsider her choice as she huffed and then stormed out of the studio. My cheeks felt hot and I realized the clothes were making me sweaty, so as Mingi hurried towards the door to close it, I shrugged my jacket off and placed it neatly on the back of the sofa together with my thick scarf. And as I looked up, mouth dry as the door clicked shut and Mingi turned around, it felt like time stopped, like the world stopped moving. But Mingi was moving towards me, in nothing more than three steps he stood in front of me, and before I could even as much as try to reason with him or plead more to be forgiven, warm fingers dug into my cheeks and the wind was knocked from my lungs as his plush warm lips slammed against mine, making me gasp as my eyes remained wide open.

『Filthy impetuous soul

I wanna give it to you』

I thought he wouldn’t want anything to do with me, I thought he’d tell me that he needed time to forgive me completely and for us to work things out. But I couldn’t help shudder and feel ecstatic as I grabbed the collar of his shirt and cardigan, my eyes falling shut, as I pulled him closer to my body, savoring the kiss as if it was our first. But it wasn’t anything like that one, it wasn’t soft nor careful nor slow, it was hurried and desperate as Mingi pushed me backward, pressing me against the wall, right between the small space between the sofa and the desk. My arms circled his neck as he grabbed my nape with one big hand and pressed his other into the small of my back, making it arch as my fingers tangled into his soft hair, not pulling, just feeling the need to hold onto something, to keep myself grounded.

And much like the first time, our lips seemed to fit perfectly, and I tried not to keen when he sucked my bottom lip between his teeth, nibbling on the soft flesh, and I tried not to turn into a puddle when he hummed lowly against my lips as my fingers flexed in his hair. Perhaps I kissed him a bit harder and more aggressively as our pace quickened, my hand holding the side of his neck as Mingi pressed his body into mine until it felt like he was trying to forbid me even of the idea of escaping from his clutches, and I had no fucking intention of going anywhere, because in his arms I felt content and safe, and perhaps a bit too hot as goosebumps covered my arms the longer our lips moved hungrily against each other. And when I cupped his cheeks and perhaps held onto them a bit too firmly, his lips parted, and I ignored my lungs screaming for air as my tongue slipped past his parted mouth. I didn’t expect him to moan as our tongues tangled together, all wet and perhaps a little disgusting, but neither one of us cared about that.

I tried to stand on my tip toes for better access as Mingi’s ring clad fingers were suddenly running through my hair and tilting my head back, making my skin tingle where he held my hip firmly. I had been kissed by other people before, but neither felt like with Mingi, neither made me crave more and more and more. But our lungs could only go on so long without air, and I would’ve been embarrassed for the loud gasp I let out when we finally parted, if it wasn’t for Mingi diving straight for my neck and finding the sweet spot that made me putty in his arms. And I tried to ignore his deep grunts as my fingers got tangled in his platinum blonde strands as he pressed open mouthed and wet kisses against my neck, his arms around my hips pulling me into an embrace that had my pulse showing through the skin of my neck. My lips were tingling and my lungs actually hurt, but I couldn’t care less when Mingi finally pulled back and blinked his dark eyes open, pupils dilated and lips so swollen he almost made me chase after them once again.

『Oh, just to see what you'd do

'Cause I'm so drunk on you』

“What’s in the thermos?” His voice was raspier than usual, and it made me bite my bottom lip as my eyes searched his face, his falling on my lips instead.

“Hot chocolate, for peace making.” I answered, sounding a lot more breathless than I actually felt, and Mingi chuckled, the sound deep in his throat. I let my arms fall from his shoulders and instead circled them around his torso, trying to fight off the smile from my lips. Mingi didn’t look angry nor dismissive anymore, but I knew I wasn’t actually forgiven just yet. And that was only fair.

“This is peacemaking, not the hot chocolate.” And there it was, the mischievous glint in his eyes and the smug smirk on his lips as he squeezed my hips once and lowered his face until our lips brushed together, “Although I do appreciate the hot chocolate too.”

“Good, my mom was rather excited when she told me to give it to you.” I pressed a chaste kiss against Mingi’s lips before he could try and say anything, and he chuckled when I pulled away, eyes creasing and crooked front teeth showing.

“What are we now?” His voice was a mere whisper, not insecure nor scared, just wondering, “What do you want?”

I gulped, but decided to be honest. No more hiding my feelings and thoughts from him, “I don’t know just yet, and that’s why I need you to take the lead, but this—I want more of this, of you.”

“Good,” Mingi hummed, lips pursed as he kissed my cheek once before slowly releasing me from his warm embrace, “because I’ve been wanting more of you for fucking ages, doll.”

I couldn’t help but chuckle as suddenly I felt embarrassed and perhaps a little shy, but Mingi seemed to be unphased as he grabbed my tote bag and looked through it because his clothes were in it, “You can keep these, they looked better on you anyway. But you better not give them to Yunho if he ever happens to go over to your house—”

“Mingi.” I snapped mortified and pushed his arm as he dropped the tote bag and burst out laughing, giving me a cheeky smile.

“Want to hear the rest of the song I made for you?”

“For me?”

“Yeah, doll, for you.”

            By the time I managed to get home I might as well been on cloud nine and in so much ecstasy that one would think I was on drugs. Which, kind of felt like it after the day I have had—not that I’ve ever done any drugs. I failed to notice my mother’s silhouette in the window of our kitchen when I got out of Mingi’s car and, of course, that meant she saw him get out of his old Honda Prelude and jog after me to kiss me hard and leave me dizzy before he left. And all of that, of course, meant that by the time I unlocked the front door and stepped inside, my mother was leaning against the archway of the kitchen with the widest smirk I’ve ever seen on her face.

“So, did you have sex?”

My eyes widened in mortification and I struggled to step out of my boots and shrug off my jacket, “Mom!”

“So, you did, huh.” It wasn’t even a question, and suddenly running after Mingi’s car sounded a lot better than standing in front of my mother as she bit her bottom lip, giving me a wink.

“We didn’t!” I exclaimed, cheeks flushed a deep red as I cradled the tote bag to my chest, “He needs to take me out on a date first—many dates, actually.”

“Well, he better hurry up then cuz you’re glowing and you’re happy.” I froze at my mother’s words as she looked at me with a serene expression on her face, lips pulled into a small smile, forgetting all about her previous teasing, “He’s good for you, too good. I haven’t seen you so relaxed and happy since—since highschool.”

Since Yunho broke up with me.

“I know, and I will make sure I never hurt him again.” I told my mom and she hummed, looking down at her wristwatch.

“You missed lunch, by the way, so you’ll eat chicken tenders—”

“Again?!”

“Again, exactly. Go wash up before dinner.”

And I was out of her sight in no time, with a newfound rush in my system, skin tingling as I realized I craved to hold my pencil and my sketchbook in my hands. I couldn’t remember the last time I drew something for me and not because it was an assignment. And if hours later the sketch looked a lot like a familiar platinum blonde haired man with sharp eyes and a tall nose wearing blue jeans, a white t-shirt and a beige cardigan over it, accessories many and nails painted black, then I wouldn’t even deny it anymore. Perhaps he would love seeing my drawings. Perhaps I should finally show him.

Mings 🖤: date on wednesday? Me: but im paying this time Mings 🖤: so when we went to the pottery coffee shop it was a date wasnt it, doll Me: maybe it was maybe it wasnt Mings 🖤: no maybes this time

『Oh, but you know me too well

Oh, but you know me too well, well』

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[level2janitor]

tactiquest structure

Edit: Play tactiquest here!

so i've posted a lot about tactiquest's classes and monsters and everything on here but i haven't really talked about the non-combat subsystems much yet and i wanted to go into detail about them, bc tactiquest has very different goals from most heroic fantasy systems.

tracking inventory, travel time, worrying about actually running out of your adventuring budget, are things a lot of big-damn-heroes fantasy systems throw out because they're just paperwork that gets in the way of your cool fights. that's not the case in Tactiquest! these systems are so core to the experience that removing them will make a lot of classes unusable. the game is built around them.

travel & exploration

tactiquest explicitly assumes you're running an open-sandbox hexcrawl and is designed to support that, including the fact the game is designed around random encounters. this is the sort of thing D&D 3e expected you to do, but people ditched random encounters because they thought they were boring and tedious. so classes balanced around that attrition of resources ended up with a huge spike in power other classes couldn't match.

the boring-and-tedious problem is mostly addressed by trying to make combat really good and resolve really fast. if i fucked that up the whole thing falls apart, but so far people are liking it

the second thing that helps with random encounters is your resources don't fully restore immediately at the end of each day like they do in 3e. resting is less effective in the wilderness and resources expended are a tomorrow problem, not just a today problem. so you don't have to have 3+ fights every single day just to maintain parity - 0-2 fights per day still adds up to difficult resource management.

because the game has such a focus on it, you can have classes like the ranger actually be good at travel and exploration instead of just giving them vaguely-naturey combat abilities.

economy

in most D&D-likes, even usually OSR ones, you accrue so much gold. just as a side effect of adventuring. to the point money no longer actually matters because you can throw piles of it at any problem. this is bad. it's a system that defeats its own purpose; there are no interesting choices involving money when you have so much the only real expense is like, 50,000-gold-piece magic items.

i don't just want players to care about money, i want them to worry about money, like a normal person. you're not batman who's a billionaire as a side hobby, you're spiderman who has to deliver pizzas in between superhero work because he's got bills to pay like everyone else. so a whole lot of effort has been put into actually designing prices and treasure amounts around this dynamic.

i also hate how games will usually go "oh adventuring gives you 900,000 gold for existing but a normal person's living wage is 2 gold a month". i don't want to be fantasy jeff bezos, thanks

inventory

this is something i just lifted from OSR games outright. you can carry ten things (and tiny things don't take up an item slot). that's the whole rule.

tracking inventory can add a lot of interesting decisions to a game and adds a new lever for abilities from classes and magic items. having a character play the merchant class which gets a bunch of extra inventory slots feels really impactful. finding a bag of holding that doubles your carry capacity feels so good when you actually have to watch your inventory.

supply

the only thing i felt was really unenjoyable when running games with strict inventory limits was tracking rations for each character that you eat every night; it felt too much like busywork with not enough payoff. so in Tactiquest rations are abstracted into a single Supply stat that's tied to the party rather than any individual character.

you can only restock Supply in towns, and it drops by 1 each time you rest. you can sleep without resting and this won't cost supply, but you won't regain any HP or other resources. this gives you the impactful decision-making of tracking rations without the annoyance of "okay it's been a day of travel, everyone make sure you dock a ration from your sheet" like twice per session

Supply is one of the things that slowly drains your funds and gives you a reason to keep seeking out treasure, tying back into the economy. it also gives merchants and rangers some extra mechanical levers for their class abilities to pull on.

[daydreaming-nerd]

The Bonds That Break Us (Rhysand x Female! Reader) Part 2

Part 1 , Part 3 , Part 4, Part 5 , Part 6, Final Part

Request: "Would you do a Rhysand x fem!reader series? Maybe fem!reader is Rhysand's mate and Tamlin's sister? So secret love?"

AN: omg guys the love part 1 received has been so amazing. I seriously am so happy you're all loving this fic as much as me. As someone who hasn't written in so long it's been so fufilling to write this. Thank you for all the kind words. Please feel free to leave a comment! Hearing your guy's feedback is what motivates me to write!

Summary: It was almost as if the cauldron liked to play games, as if it had sensed years of boredom and predictability and begged to be entertained. Its method of absolving its melancholy? Mate the High Lord of the Night Court to the younger sister of the High Lord of Spring. 

Warnings (so far): SA, starting to get a little steamy

Word count: 2704

(all photos are from pinterest)

The next morning I woke with a certain lightness to my step that I knew shouldn’t be there. My hands skimmed over the countless dresses looking for just the right one. All of the sudden I had started caring more about my appearance for council meetings. Deep down I know why. 

I meet my brother and Lucien in the foyer per usual, and I feel Lucien’s fiery gaze rake over the lavender chiffon draped over my body. I told myself that I had selected the revealing dress because of how hot the Day court was, but I think I had other motives backing my choice. 

The Day Court, like all other courts, was utterly beautiful. Large pillars stood all around and like the summer court it was entirely open air, allowing the sunlight and breeze to float into the room. I sit between Lucien and Tamlin at a large table with the other High Lord’s and nobility. My eyes scan the room for a hint of that violet that I dreamt about last night but I don’t find it. It isn’t until a few minutes later, when my skin starts buzzing, that the High Lord of Night steps into the room. His presence commending, his eyes immediately finding mine. 

I feel him pluck at the bond as if to say hello. After speaking to him through my mind for so long it was almost strange to see him in real life. Somehow he was always much more handsome in person. Like no matter how many times I tried to put together the image of his face at night it never compares to the sheer glory and presence of him. 

As Helion began speaking a voice crawled into my head. 

I’m glad you find me so glorious, darling.

“Shh you nosey High Lord. I’m trying to listen,” I silence him and to my  surprise he obliges.  

Helion talks on and on and of course there is arguing between Kallias and Beron as there usually is but I couldn’t begin to tell you what about. I spend the entire meeting noticing every move the High Lord of Night made. When he breathed, or flexed his hands, adjusted his spot on his seat. Whenever I felt his eyes sliding over to me I would do my best to evade them. 

See something you like? I look over to him and find his eyes smirking. 

“Yeah actually, Eris is looking especially delicious today,” I tease, I don’t break eye contact with him. 

He chuckles brushing off my comment. You’re a vision in purple mate, but if Lucien looks at your cleavage one more time I might just leap across the table and rip his only good eye out. 

“So violent,” I muse disapprovingly, looking towards where Kallias is speaking about potential war with Hybern.

I save my most brutal acts of violence for those who seek to harm you darling. My eyes flit back at him and a smile tugs at the corners of his lips as he averts his gaze back to Kallias. 

“Enough talk of war my friends, let us adjourn this meeting until next week.” Helion finally says, causing the rest of the council to let out a breath. 

Tamlin doesn’t say a word before he and Lucien stand and make a beeline to Tarquin, most likely to talk about problems we’ve been having on the border. I take it as my queue to walk around the Day Court’s terrace and I secretly hope that a certain High Lord follows me. 

The Day Court and the Summer Court are like twin sisters. Except the Day Court always felt like liquid gold. All around me I could see clouds and honeyed sunlight peeking through the them. The rays warmed my skin as I basked in them, leaning against one of the many large pillars. 

“I knew you’d look amazing in this light,” drawled that voice I had secretly wanted to hear. 

I glance over to find The High Lord admiring me, the light of the Day Court doing wonders for him as well. “You shouldn’t be here,” I say, trying to act like I mean it. 

“Yet you wanted me to follow you,” he smirks knowingly, slowly stepping towards me. 

“What makes you say that?” 

“This,” he says, pulling on the bond again. I take a sharp breath in and he chuckles. “I’ll never get tired of that reaction.”

“I really hate it when you do that,” I grumble. 

“No you don’t,” he muses using one arm to cage me into the pillar I’m leaning against. 

“Yes I do,” I affirm. His other hand lifts my chin to meet his stare. 

“No you don’t, you don’t hate anything about me. In fact you think I’m beautiful,” he smirks, somehow stepping even closer to me. “And, you want me to touch you right now, your skin is practically on fire for it.” 

“My Lord-” 

“I told you to call me Rhysand,” he cuts me off. I want to lie and tell him no, I want to push him away but I fear that even the action of me touching his chest, even for a moment, would be too much for me to bear. 

“Rhys,” I breathe out. Before I can even think his lips are on mine swallowing the breath that held his name, just like he promised.  

The kiss is hot and needy, built up from the last two weeks of torture. One of his hands finds my face while the other finds my waist. His frame presses me into the pillar behind me. I feel my body ignite in a way I didn’t know possible, I need him closer. I pull on the lapels of his jacket earning a low grumble from him. 

“Say it again,” he says between kisses. 

“Rhysand,” I moan, his name like a prayer on my lips. 

“Fuck,” he groans before sliding a hand down under my knee and hoisting it up to wrap around his waist. The slit in my dress parted for him, giving him full access to my bare leg. I feel his lips drag across my neck leaving opened mouth kisses on me. I practically come undone for him, the only thing keeping me upright are his hands and the pillar behind me. 

In the distance I can hear footsteps clicking across the floor, in a panic I winnow both of us further away. He breaks apart the kiss and gives me a bewildered look. 

“Sorry, someone was coming,” I say breathlessly. 

“Let them see,” he grins before stepping closer to me. I take a step back and he halts his movements, surprised. 

“We can’t, my brother will kill me, kill you.” I remind him. 

He lets out a chuckle like he’s completely unphased, “I promise you that I hold more power in my pinky than Tamilin does in his entire body.”  he boasts. 

“Still,” I start. “You’re the High Lord of the Night Court, his sworn enemy, my court's sworn enemy. Think of what they would say about me if the truth came out. What they would say about you. You’d be the monster who stole away the princess of spring.” I ramble. 

“I’ve been called a monster by those who know nothing but stories of me my whole life, what’s one more?” he states. 

“I’ve heard stories of your court, that it’s the part of Prythian where the most feared monsters and beings of our kind reside,” I say fearfully. I start to remember who he is. Not just a pretty face, but the High Lord of the Night Court. He’s dangerous, and he is a monster. 

“Part of that is true,” he affirms, and I can see a tinge of hurt in his eyes. 

“And the other part?” I ask on bated breath. 

“You’ll see soon enough mate,” he says. 

“My Lord we cannot be together,” I state firmly. 

“Back to formalities now are we?” he sighs. “I’ve waited 500 years to find my mate y/n, don’t think for one second that I’m going to stay away from you just because you’re afraid of that pathetic excuse for a brother.” 

“He’s not pathetic, he loves me!” I growl. 

“You don’t know half the things you think you do about your brother,” he sneered. 

As much as I hated to admit it he was right. Tamlin and I had never truly been close. We hardly ever did anything together. I always sensed a darkness in him that I couldn’t place. There was so much he simply refused to tell me just because I was a woman. But I couldn't bear that truth to Rhys, not when I needed his silence. 

“This conversation is over,” I huff before walking away, I feel him grasp my arm. 

“No darling it’s not,” Rhys says with frustration in his eyes. 

“Wanna bet?” I ask smugly before winnowing back to the Spring Court. 

The next few days I don’t hear from Rhysand, and I don’t feel a tug on the bond. All of the sudden my life is filled with a sense of melancholy, I never had before. I had grown so used to his constant tugging on the bond or his remarks throughout my daily life that I felt a little empty without him.  

So empty that I now found myself nudging around the food on my plate at dinner. Lucien had been out with the emissary of the Summer Court fixing the problems on the border, which meant it was just me and Tamlin. 

We spend the whole meal in silence until he finally breaks it, “I have something I want to discuss with you,” he says, placing his napkin down on the table. 

“What is it?” I ask, starting to wonder if maybe he saw me and Rhysand the other day. 

“I’ve been talking with Beron Vanserra, and it seems that his eldest son Eris has taken a liking to you. We think it might be in the best interest of our two courts if you two were to marry.” he says casually, as if the words weren’t a huge punch to the gut. 

“What?” I breathe in disbelief. 

“Come on y/n this has always been our plan, to get you an advantageous marriage.” he reminds me, irritation laced in his voice. 

“Not my plan Tamlin, yours.” I seethe. “Eris is a viper, I won’t marry him.” 

“You’ll do as you're told and that’s final!” he screams slamming his fists down on the table making the silverware rattle. 

I leave my plate full of food on the table and get up. If I wasn’t hungry before I certainly am not now. I leave the dining room and make sure to slam the door on my way out. The halls of the palace were dark save for the moonlight drifting through the windows. My mind was a mess of Tamlin’s words, I was so angry I could hardly think beyond it. At the end of the hall there was a door and even from where I was I could see the doorknob turning. A head of red hair popped through the door and Lucien stumbled to close it.

 I kept my head down trying to avoid him but it was no use. The second he passed me his hands were on me shoving me into the nearest wall. 

“Hello my flower,” he slurred. 

“You’re drunk Lucien,” I pointed out, jerking my head away. 

“Yes I suppose I am, the emissary for the summer court knows how to celebrate. We went to a tavern after completing the job on the border to indulge in some women and maybe a few drinks,” he chuckled. 

“Yeah a few hundred drinks you fucking idiot,” I gripe trying to get out of his grasp but his hands only pin my wrists tighter.

“It was fun, but being around all those women made me long for my little flower,” he smiled drunkenly before kissing my neck. 

For months now he’s been doing this, stealing touches whenever he could, and kissing my neck like this when he was feeling really bold, or in this case, drunk. He never took it further than that though. Never kissing, never fully fucking me, and I think it’s because he knew that it would be where Tamilin drew the line. But tonight he was drunk, in a way I had never seen him before, and I wasn’t sure if the line that had held for so many months would be held now. 

“Get the fuck off me Lucien,” I growl trying to push him off again. 

He completely ignores me, “You know my dear I’ve let my hands wander every expanse of this magnificent body, but I have yet to taste you,” he says lowly. “I think I’m going to change that.” 

I don’t even get a chance to try and fight before his lips are on mine. He tastes like shitty whiskey and he smells like cheap perfume. It’s vile and it has me sick to my stomach. I find my opening to rip my lips off him and take it. 

“Lucien what the fuck!” I scream in his face. His eyes just go down to my heaving chest, where my breasts are pushed up high due to my corset. 

“And these,” he drawls before placing open mouth kisses on the peaks of my breasts. His hand lets go of my wrist and flies to my waist to pull me closer to him and I take the change of position as an opportunity to knee him between his legs. 

His knees hit the ground and I run down the hall towards my room. I slam and lock the door as fast as possible, barricading myself in with a chair. I pace back and forth trying to dispel the pent up adrenaline that’s inside of me but in the end I sink to my knees and start to cry. 

What happened?

That calming voice cleaves its way through my mind and it feels like a huge weight off my chest has been lifted. 

“It was Lucien he tried to…” I let my voice trail off not even wanting to finish the sentence. I know the High Lord of Night is at the complete other end of Prythian but I swear I feel the ground beneath me tremble. 

Did he? He asks, like he would winnow here right now and make due on his promise of ripping out his good eye. 

“No, I fought him off,” I assure him.

Are you safe? 

“As safe as I can be, I barricaded the door,”  I say, as my heart rate calms down. 

You shouldn’t have to live in a place where you have to barricade yourself in your room.

“Well I do so I’m handling it the best I can,” I gripe at him. I would gladly change the situation if I could but I can’t. There's a silence and I can feel him ruminating over my words as I crawl into bed. 

I’m sorry I shouldn’t have said it like that. 

“It’s okay I understood what you meant,” I say pulling the covers up to my chin like they might protect me. 

And I’m sorry for what I said about Tamlin. I shouldn’t have gotten angry with you, he’s your brother, of course you’re going to defend him.

“It’s okay, maybe everything you said about Tamlin wasn’t entirely false,” I confess remembering the conversation that had me fleeing the dining room in the first place. 

What happened? 

A moment passes and I think about telling him. But saying it almost makes it real and I choose not to, “I’d rather not talk about it now. Too much has happened tonight,” I say

Alright we won’t then. I sense disappointment in his voice but I am happy that he respects my wishes. 

“Rhys?”I ask, and there’s a hesitation there. 

Yes darling? He purrs and I can hear him practically swooning at the fact that I said his name.

“I don’t wanna be alone, will you stay up with me?” I confess feeling like I’m baring my soul. 

Of course I will darling, all night if you want me to.

Taglist: @heyyitsnat21 , @cheshire-salvatore-mikaelson , @randomperson1234sblog , @local-fangirl09 , @bleh-81 , @annaaaaa88

(I've never made a taglist so hopefully this works)

[cosmerelists]

Favorite Video Game Genres of Cosmere Characters

As requested by @thesternest :)

1. Silence

Silence: Don't know why, really, but I like casual games, games that are just like real life. Silence: Something about doing your daily life, but in game form--very relaxing. William Anne: Uh, mama? I think "Silent Hill" is a survival-horror game. Silence: It is? How so?

2. Marasi

Marasi: [Looks around nervously] Marasi: I...well, I like first-person shooters. Marasi: I-I just like to pretend I'm in the Roughs, like Wax! Marasi: I don't want to be Wax in real life or anything, but...it can be fun in a game!

3. Dalinar

Dalinar: In real life, war is a terrible necessity. Dalinar: In games, war is fun. Dalinar: ... Dalinar: I like tactical RPGs.

4. Vin

Vin: Huge fan of platform games. Vin: Jumping from ledge to ledge, controlling my speed and trajectory, occasionally swinging from hooks or managing double jumps... Vin: It's just like moving through the city as a Mistborn! Elend: Your high-score is RIDICULOUS, Vin! Vin: I'm also REALLY good at it.

5. Yumi

Yumi: I wasn't allowed video games for a long time, but now that I can play them... Yumi: [eyes sparking] I've become a HUGE fan of visual novels! Yumi: It's like Seasons of Regret, only *I* can be the one making the choices!

6. Leshwi

Leshwi: Like many Fused and Singers, I find myself quite taken with Rhythm games. Leshwi: Now that it is no longer appropriate for me to fight the Windrunners, I do like to challenge them to Dance Dance Revolution instead. Kaladin: OH COME ON I DEFINITELY HAD THAT Leshwi: I always win.

7. Steris

Steris: I used to think games were a waste of time, but then Wax introduced me to these construction simulators. Steris: My city is a paradise with excellent infrastructure, logical layout, and plenty of greenspace. Wayne: You should try to mod that makes a tsunami hit your city! Steris: Oh please, I beat that mod yesterday on my first try.

8. Navani

Navani: Recently, I've gotten into Tower Defense games. Sibling: I can defend myself, thank you very much.

9. Vivenna

Vivenna: Love a good roguelike. Vivenna: It's something about trying it over and over again until you're perfect. Vivenna: The victory is sooo sweet when you've worked hard to achieve it, dying many times. Siri: Oh me too!! I especially like Hades--the art is AMAZING. Vivenna: (scoffs) You mean a rogue-lite? Siri: I'm telling you--you should try one! Getting powerups in between runs is pretty sweet. Vivenna: Hedging out a difficult victory after hours of blood, sweat and tears is also fun! Siri: If you say so...

10. Lightsong

Lightsong: Soooo addicted to Candy Crush. Lighsong: Can't even tell you why. Llarimar: Perhaps your divine eye is drawn to the bright colors. Lightsong: Whatever makes you feel better, Scoot.

11. Adolin

Adolin: Lately I've become completely engrossed with life simulators. Adolin: I make my character get up, make breakfast, go to work, go on dates, learn the piano... Adolin: WHY IS IT SO ADDICTING?? Shallan: This may be a sign that your actual life is incredibly stressful and the allure of a simple, daily life is drawing you in? Adolin: No, that doesn't sound right... Shallan: You want to date a bisexual vampire? Adolin: ...That could be it.

12. Rlain

Rlain: I'm quite taken with these cozy farming games. Rlain: You just build a nice farm, meet the villagers, explore around. Renarin: Rlain, please, it's been six hours! Rlain: Just one more day...

13. Tress

Tress: I've been enjoying survival games! Tress: It's fun to gather and cook and build a base! Tress: A little bit unrealistic, because the rain doesn't make anything explode, but I guess they wanted to make it easier than real life, not harder.

14. Shallan

Shallan: It has to be MMOs for me. Shallan: I like a game where I can do pretty much anything I want. Shallan: Advance the story, collect every type of mushroom, fill in the whole map... Shallan: Plus, I like leveling every class and giving each one their own outfit and personality. Veil: You named the rogue after me, I see. Shallan: It's a compliment.

15. Kelsier

Kelsier: There's only one type of game for me: and that's a game where the name of the, uh, game is survival. Kelsier: And I especially like it when you have to survive as a team. Kelsier: Especially against great odds--like lots and lots of real-life players. Kelsier: Yup, yup. Kelsier: It's all about Fornite for me.

[royallyprincesslilly]

Title: Everyone Else Is No.2 {One-Shot}***

Lewis Hamilton x Attorney Friend Reader

Warning: Cursing, NSFW, Mature 18+ Content, Angst, PLENTY OF WORDS, DIALOGUE HEAVY

Words: 15.2k

Summary: Again, nah.

Note: Inspired by that old August Alsina song "Kissing on My Tattoos". So sorry for how long it is and for the long sentences toward the end, it couldn't be any other way. Forgive the weird spacing throughout, Tumblr has a 1,000 block limit per post, and guess who reached it before correcting the spacing.

Note II: Really interested in hearing what you guys think about this one. Let me know.

As always, thank you guys for reading! I appreciate it. I hope you enjoy this.

If you did enjoy this, please, LIKE, COMMENT, REBLOG!!!

***NOT Edited/Proofread***

-Y/N-

"You're beautiful you know that right?"

You smiled and took a sip of your drink.

"Thanks."

The man sitting across from you, Darius, nodded and before he looked down to his plate you caught his eyes drop to your cleavage. Of course, you thought. This was your 2nd date with him. The first went smoothly though you'd went with little to no expectations for it to be so. Tonight, he said the right things, did the right things, and was the perfect gentleman.

He'd even chosen a great restaurant. The ambiance was perfect for a second date. So far you had only counted 2 things that were less than satisfactory, everything was on point. He was so on point that you wondered if he was acting and not being his genuine self.

You hated the dating scene. Everyone held their cards too close to their chest. No one was ever real about anything. Everyone liked to waste people's time all in the name of fun and sex. These days you only treated dating as a pastime and a way to relieve stress after long hours of working on briefs and reviewing case files.

"A woman with your track record in law. Wheeew. Was it hard?"

You shrugged then wiped the corner of your mouth, "It definitely wasn't easy. I still remember the sleepless nights, and times when I only had 1 meal a day. My parents still remember not seeing me for 3 months because of the bar and my first major case that came nearly right behind the other. They won't let me forget it."

"It looks like it paid off. You're on the partner track. Shit, you'd be the first woman under 35 to make that happen at Halsey Boyd and Crenshaw," Darius said.

You bristled, but politely smiled and took another sip of your wine.

"I'm sorry I don’t mean to make this weird I'm just in awe of you."

You studied him for a few moments but found no lie. You could always tell a lie. No matter what the case, no matter who it was. It was your secret weapon and it served you well as a lawyer.

"Thank you, but enough about me. What about you? Tell me about Darius Forrester."

He smiled, licked his lips then looked you directly in the eye.

"I'm pretty much a what you see you get kind of guy. I've been at Berry & Clark for the last 6 years as a criminal attorney. The work is challenging but I do alright for myself.

You nodded. He did. From what you heard his win ratio was nearly 92% and he took upstanding cases. He was a good attorney. Normally you wouldn’t shit where you ate because mess was not your style. You did not want to walk into a courtroom or boardroom and see the opposing counsel was an ex. That one thing gave you nightmares.

So dating lawyers was out of the question. You dipped in every other career field, playing it safe. The further they were from a law career the better. However, after a conversation with your other lawyer girlfriends about limiting oneself in the already limited dating pool, something clicked, and you decided to try it once but only if they weren't in your firm. Darius was your first attempt.

As he continued to tell you facts about himself you listened, but he didn't have your full attention. There was another person who held your attention, a person who though was usually out of sight was never really out of mind.

You heard your phone sound from your clutch resting on the table and both your eyes shot to it. Darius spoke before you moved.

"Go ahead please."

"Are you sure?"

"I'm an attorney as well, Y/N I know you come attached to it."

You smiled, held up your finger to him silently promising it would be quick, then took your phone in hand. You expected it to be Kemi, your paralegal, with files you were expecting, but it wasn't her name on your screen.

MSG Lewis: What're you doing tonight? Going over an endless to-do list of contracts and briefs?

You smirked.

MSG: Not even close.

MSG Lewis: Wow did someone finally decide to live a little and cut loose?

MSG: This sounds an awful lot like the pot calling the kettle black.

MSG Lewis: Plead the 5th.

MSG: The Lewis Hamilton out maneuvered. Say it ain't so.

MSG: I'm close to your place. Just got back in town. Can you be ready in 10?

Your eyes flitted to Darius across from you who was taking the time to check his messages as well. You looked over him slowly, noting again how great he looked in his suit and how you liked the effort he had put in the last 2 dates down to the flowers he brought you and the activities you'd done. Things could progress if you chose to allow them to.

MSG Lewis: Is that a no?

MSG: I'm not home.

MSG Lewis: Okay. Where you at, the office? I can come pick you up.

MSG: I'm not at the office. I'm actually on a date.

You waited a few seconds, but he didn’t reply. Why didn't he reply?

"Everything ok?"

Caught off guard, you looked back up to Darius whose eyes were already on you. His brows were knitted with concern.

"Uh--yeah. I uh--I think so."

"A case?"

You thought about it and technically he was right. You were Lewis' entertainment lawyer. You were his personal attorney who reviewed the contracts after the company attorney said they had. You gave it to him between the eyes, never sugarcoating, and told him what was made with his best interest and what was made to capitalize off of him. However, when your services weren’t needed you were friends. Had been for practically a decade now.

Sometimes you couldn’t believe you’d known each other that long. You’d known him since he was just another F1 driver rather than the greatest. He knew you when you were going through school always on an empty tank all in the hopes of rising above the tax bracket you were born into. A decade later and he was dominating F1 and you’d more than risen yourself several levels past the tax bracket you’d been born into.

You were on the partner track at one of the largest firms in Europe. You brought in more revenue than most of the attorneys at the firm thanks to your high-class clientele. You'd both worked your asses off to get to this level and enjoyed the spoils of your labor often. You clubbed together, went to dinner, and sometimes did the vacation vibe together. You enjoyed one another’s company.  

"A client."

"Oh. Everything cool or---," Darius said.

Another message came in just then. "Everything is cool."

Darius smiled. "Good. I'll be right back, men’s room."

"Yeah."

Darius stood then walked off leaving you with the perfect opportunity to check your phone.

MSG Lewis: Is that right?

MSG: Yeah. 2nd date. Well technically 3rd if you can have 2 dates in one day.

MSG Lewis: Cool. Is it going well?

MSG: Yeah. He's made it this far.

MSG Lewis: Cool.

MSG: When he drops me home Ill text you. Come get me then.

Several moments passed before he replied. Again, you wondered why.

MSG Lewis: Cool.

The remainder of dinner you were distracted. Darius played all his cards right, even scoring himself the green light on a little hand-holding action. You had to admit he was smooth. When he pulled up to your condo building he walked you to your door then went in for a kiss. You hadn’t expected it, but rather than pull away, you allowed it to play out. It wasn’t a bad kiss. He hadn’t been too overzealous, only slipped you a little tongue, and had kept his hands respectful. All in all, for a first kiss it was a solid 8.

With a promise to call to set date number 4 sometime next week, you went inside and allowed yourself to come down. The dating scene was not something you enjoyed often. You always felt like you were performing, like men wanted a certain kind of woman, the perfect woman who they could prance around on their arm to make other men envious and that took its toll.

You never felt you had to perform with Lewis. Never felt like he wanted the perfect you. He made fun of you whenever you were perfectly put together for work meetings and said many times he liked you out of the makeup and heels. After another sigh, you took your phone out and texted him.

~~~~~~

-Lewis-

The ceiling looked like every other ceiling he’d ever seen but that didn’t stop him from focusing most of his attention on it like it was the most interesting piece of construction ever. His eyes should have been focused elsewhere but they weren’t. A loud 'slurp' echoed in the mostly quiet room reminding him again that he wasn’t alone.

"Mm. Why are you so distracted tonight, bae?"

Julissa's voice was as smooth as honey and as seductive as ever. He lowered his eyes to where she was kneeling between his legs and took her in. Her lips and chin were wet as she gave him her bedroom eyes. This was not the first time between them. Usually, it would work but not tonight. Tonight he was struggling to even keep his head in the room.

He watched her tip her tongue out and lick from the base of his dick to the glistening tip. Once there she swirled her tongue around him then sucked his head into her mouth. He’d have to be dead for it not to feel nice but that’s all it was--nice.

He sighed then brought his attention back to the ceiling. "Work."

"Aw babe, when you’re with me work should be the last thing on your mind," Julissa said before lowering her mouth down his shaft. When he felt her tonsils he groaned. His body wanted to like this wanted to give her the reaction she was working so hard for, but something was holding him back. Julissa's mouth bobbed up and down his cock sucking and slurping to her heart’s content trying to get him off, but he knew she had her work cut out for her.

He thought back to your text from 2 hours ago. You were on a date. Well shit, he hadn’t seen that coming. That was the last thing he had expected you to be doing tonight. It wasn’t because you weren’t desirable, or he thought no man would want you. For fuck's sake, you were beyond desirable, you were gorgeous and so damn intelligent. He couldn’t figure out which of those made you more beautiful, your looks or your brains. You also worked hard to be where you were, and you deserved all the praise and attention you got wherever you went.

However, sometimes he wished you got a little less male attention--x that, a lot less male attention. He sighed again. This had been going on for 10 years now. Your friendship had only strengthened but along with a strengthening friendship came a lot of other stuff. Stuff like him taking notice of the fullness of your hips or being tempted to peek when you’d been changing in the backseat of his car, or being painfully aware of how your breasts felt against his chest when you hugged.

That coupled with things he had picked up from you, made the unspoken and ignored things that much more—confusing. There were times when the way you stared at him when you thought he wasn’t looking spoke volumes or the way your hand always lingered on him for a few seconds longer than necessary but not long enough for it to be inappropriate, or the time you'd fallen asleep together on the couch and he'd woken to you wrapped around him using him as your personal body pillow and mumbling his name in your sleep.

Yeah, there was a lot of extra stuff, stuff neither of you ever addressed. The only ones who assessed it were his friends. Miles told him on several occasions that he should be careful before he or you fucked around, and someone ended up hurt. That stuck with him, but not in the way Miles had probably meant it. Rather than taking it the way Miles meant, he used it as a means to keep himself in check, a form of prevention from him crossing the line. He knew if he did, neither of you would be able to go back. It would be impossible and was one fuck up worth a decades-long friendship?

So friends were where you stayed until he added another facet--professional. Years passed, dates passed, flings, non-labeled encounters on both your parts passed and through it all your friendship remained, and nothing changed. Except today there was even more extra stuff.

The feel of Julissa’s lips wrapped around his balls sent his hips jerking upward as a curse left his lips. Julissa moaned and giggled.

“Daddy likes that?”

He knew how he would like it more. As quickly as he revved to that thought he steered away from it. That was when his phone sounded.

MSG Y/N: I’m home. Whatdaya you wanna do? Should I change?

His eye caught the time. 1am. Almost 3 hours from your last text and you were only now getting home. Clenching his jaw he took a deep breath. He had no right to be mad or annoyed right now. He knew where this was coming from. You’d been on a date, and you said it was going well. A date going well had a chance of making it upstairs. He closed his eyes squeezing them tightly. He hoped to God that you hadn’t just gotten it in.

MSG Y/N: Hello?

MSG: You don’t have to change. How about some treats and a view?

MSG Y/N: Okay. Still 10?

MSG: Make it 15.

Pulling himself up he reached down to stop Julissa. She looked confused.

“I gotta go J.”

Now she looked even more confused. He didn’t owe her an explanation, that’s not how this worked between them.

“With your dick out?”

He scoffed then fixed himself as he stood.

“Lewis this’s never happened before. Are--,” she began before he cut her off.

“All good, just—not in the mood I guess.”

She looked offended now. “I’m sorry J. We’ll talk.”

He walked to the door then left her apartment without a glance back. He didn’t feel any way about it because both of them knew what their relationship was and wasn’t. She’d agreed. Once he was in his car, he zipped through the London streets maneuvering the quickest route to your place. Thanks to the time it was an easy drive with minimal traffic. 15 minutes on the dot he swerved around to the front of your luxury condo building then sent you a text letting you know he was there.

A few minutes later, he peeped you from the corner of his eye. You walked off the elevator in a short and tight black dress, impossibly high strappy black heels, and a flowy robe-like jacket that danced behind you as you walked.

“Fuck.”

You were beautiful. Just then the thought that you’d gone on a date dressed like this rubbed him wrong. Some other man had seen this view, a view you gave willingly. Clenching his jaw, he looked through his windshield as he tried to push all those thoughts—all that other stuff to the side as he’d done countless times before. He looked back just in time to see you open the door of his car then climb in. His eyes dropped to your legs but seconds later he corrected that.

“Hi!”

Your smile was bright as if you really were as happy to see him as your voice indicated.

“Hey.”

You reached over and pressed your cheek to his for a bougie kiss. The only thing he could think was that you smelled like a treat all by yourself.

“How are you?”

“Good. You?”

“Good. Wow, what’s it been? 2 months?”

He shrugged as he shifted gears and took off. “Something like that.”

“Mercedes sure knows how to keep you busy,” you teased.

He tried to focus on the road but from his peripheral, he could see you crossing your legs displaying even more skin.

“What were you doing? You smell like fruits.”

He chastised himself because he hadn’t done a bit of cleaning up before he came. His only thought was you. Julissa’s fruity lip gloss still stained his dick that he couldn’t manage to get hard for her.

“Nowhere special. Just kickin’ it.”

You didn’t press further which said you knew just what he was doing. He clenched his jaw again, this time annoyed with himself. As he drove to the dessert place you told him about what was going on in your life while he shared some bits of his with you. Like always conversation flowed like a calm river. It was something he loved. It didn’t take long for him to pull up to the drive-thru of the vegan dessert shop. When it was his turn at the window he tipped his hat lower and left the ordering to you.

You ordered damn near everything on the menu. You didn’t care if it was cake, cupcake, ice cream, brownie, or whipped cream. You ordered at least 2 of everything. It took the staff a good 5 minutes to prepare it all and when he loaded them in the backseat it was completely filled. When he looked at you with an “are you serious right now” look, all you did was giggle. Fuck, he thought. There went all that extra stuff again.

“There is no way we can finish all this,” he said looking at the bags they’d moved to the front since parking at their destination.

“Speak for yourself. I always have room for sugar, sugar.”

He snorted then shook his head. “Mad whack.”

Your jaw dropped as you gaped at him, and you looked too fucking adorable. You sifted through the bags until you found the dessert you wanted—the vanilla bean cheesecake. Your eyes lit up as you gawked at the large slice that was topped with white chocolate shavings. “It's so pretty,” you gushed.

He watched you snap picture after picture of the treat before you took your first forkful. When you did, your eyes rolled to the back of your head as you let out a completely indulgent, hearty, and dick-hardening moan. The fuck, he thought as his dick spasmed to life. Quickly he moved one of the bags to his lap and looked out the window.

“This is so good,” you obliviously said still munching on cake.

He pulled out the vegan chocolate truffle cake and took a bite. It too was good.

“That looks good. Is it?”

“Try it,” he said holding out a forkful to your mouth.

You paused for a split second then cut off a piece of your cheesecake before you held your fork to his mouth.

“You try too.”

The image that came to mind was that of a new husband and wife feeding each other wedding cake and with it, his throat went dry. He knew if he tried to speak he’d sound like a pre-pubescent boy, so he wrapped his lips around your fork taking the piece of cake then fed you his. Your eyes lingered on one another for a few moments nut when you moaned again his dick spasmed again. with that he turned his head so fast that he was surprised he hadn’t snapped his own neck in the process.

“So good,” you repeated.

The two of you sat there commenting on the desserts you went through in record time. He didn’t indulge in sweets often but when he did he found it was usually with your sugar-addicted ass. You said there were 4 things in life you would never give up, sugar, your favorite perfume, your favorite underwear set, and sex. He believed you on all points. When there were only a few pieces of cake left the silence in the car stretched.

“So—a date huh.”

“A date.”

“I thought you gave up dating.”

You took a deep breath then slowly released it before turning your body at an angle facing him. The hem of your dress hiked a little higher and he forced himself to look away.

“I did. Then I got bored and he asked.”

“What does he do?”

You didn’t answer automatically, instead, you took another forkful or 2 of cake, then you spoke.

“He’s an attorney.”

“I thought you didn’t date attorneys.”

“I don’t but me and the girls were talking, and it clicked that by x-ing out a whole career field greatly decreased me finding someone who could stick around.”

He paused. Stick around? This was new.

“Stick around? Are you—are you looking for something—serious?”

You took a beat then shrugged. “I don’t know. I thought the other day, I have everything I have ever wanted. I am on this partner track, I make very high 6 figures, I have a great condo, my mental health is amazing, I have no debt, no baby daddies or drama, I—I’m kinda a catch but I go to sleep alone 98% of my nights. I come home to an empty place, I have no meaningful text exchanges, there is—nothing fulfilling in my life. I began to wonder if it was time to change all of that last bit.”

Silence stretched again as he thought over your words while studying you. This was the first time he’d heard you speak like this. Usually, you changed the subject or downplayed having any other thoughts than fun, sex, and work. Now hearing the vulnerability in your voice he knew you’d come to a point where all of this, intention-free dating, pastime sex, stress-busting flirting and all the meaningless interactions were unfulfilling and empty. You wanted more, you wanted love, a life, a husband, kids, vacation homes, and retirement funds, you wanted the quintessential definition of it all. He also noted you now found everything he was currently partaking in meaningless and unfulfilling.

Dropping his head, he stabbed the cake still in his hands. The more puncture holes it picked up the less and less he wanted it.

“Fuck, maybe I’m just bored and need a really, really, good fuck.”

He snorted but it was humorless.

“Don’t downplay what you feel, Y/N. Don’t—make what you feel insignificant, so you feel less vulnerable. It’s okay to be vulnerable. It’s you and me here.”

“It’s just—you—I know those are things you don’t necessarily want and you’re happy with the--.”

“Who said I don’t want those things?”

His tone was sharp and defensive though he hadn’t meant for it to be.

“Uh—you did.”

“No. I said it’s not something I can afford right now with my schedule and my contract extension. I didn’t say I never wanted it.”

You looked away from him to out the window. “Yeah, but your actions say a lot different,” you mumble.

“What does that mean?”

“Nothing.”

“Y/N, look at me. What does that mean?”

You sat quietly for a few moments then just when he was about to ask again you blurted.

“There is a difference between I don’t want it now and I don’t want it ever. Someone who wants it someday would leave themselves open to it rather than boxing every interaction they have into--other things.”

“What if I don’t want to open myself to it?”

“That’s clear Lew.”

“No. You don’t get it. What if I don’t want to open myself to it because I don’t want to find the perfect thing—the perfect woman and then be fucked because it’s too soon and too hard to keep her in my world to wait until I can make those commitments because my world is fucked—I’m fucked because I want the world and will actually keep going until I get it anyone else be damned.”

He could feel your eyes on him, and it was his turn to feel vulnerable and exposed.

“You think because you put everyone in one box it stops what’s meant to be from—being?”

He glanced at you with a pained expression, he knew it. He was actually feeling pain.

“Also—you’re not fucked because you want the world. I want the fucking world. Am I fucked?”

“To be determined.”

You both busted out laughing then. You laughed for a good minute then smiled as it tapered off.

“Aren’t you the tiniest bit lonely in the other side of your life—away from F1?”

He didn’t need to think about that. He knew the answer, but he didn’t want to tell you. The facts were that he was lonely more times than not. That was when he called someone to come distract him or make him feel good. He’d become an expert in the art of distraction. In his life, he only had time and the capacity for low stress and no mess. He had enough of both already.

He felt your hand creep into his and squeeze gently. Suddenly, there was all this other stuff again. The feel of your smaller hand in his larger one was something he really liked. Usually, when either of you took the other’s hand it was in passing or for a second, but the moment lingered and stretched, and still you kept your hand in his swirling your fingers against his palm and other fingers. He liked this too much.

“You can tell me. I won’t judge you. In fact—I’m lonely.”

His eyes slipped to you. Your head was down staring at your hands. It had now moved to trace the tattoos on his hand with the point of your nail as if his flesh were an adult coloring book. He watched you trace the rose on his pinky, then the planets on his ring finger. When you got to the lined arrow down his middle, he was having trouble swallowing again. Slowly, you traced the spaceship then went up across the sword until you reached his wrist.

He didn’t know if there was rhyme or reason to your movements or if you were just absently doing it. Goosebumps peppered his skin when you went up his forearm. He looked at you just before your eyes met his.

“You are?”

You nodded. “I am,” you whispered.

The air was on but inside the car easily felt like a sweltering 99 degrees. He didn’t know if it was from your touch or if it was the shift in the air between you. Did you notice it too?

“I think it’s okay to be lonely especially looking at how we live. We’re always working, always pushing ourselves to and through glass ceilings and when we do there is no one really there to share it with, not really, not in the way that fulfills,” you said.

Your face was closer to his now. Had he moved closer or was it you? Your eyes met again, and the temperature kicked up again. Fuck, he thought as his dick recklessly spasmed, begging for attention.

“I’m never lonely with you,” he said before his brain could stop his mouth.

A small smile lit your face, “Me too. Never with you.”

The smile slipped. “Well—not always.”

He turned to you more now, curiosity filling him. “What do you mean?”

You stayed quiet for a few moments but kept tracing his skin with your nail.

“There are times I can’t—guess what you’re thinking. Times I can’t—figure you out.”

“Then ask me.”

“Would you really tell me?”

He leaned closer. “I’d tell you anything.”

You searched his eyes, but you didn’t move back.

“Anything?”

He nodded slowly. His head felt hazy like you had him under some sort of spell with nothing more than your presence and the tip of your finger and all he truly wanted was to touch you in return. So he did. Reaching across to your exposed knee, he circled his finger around the smooth skin there. You sucked in a breath the moment his finger touched you and that one action nearly had him pulling you across the partition right onto his lap. Nearly.

So there on a hill that overlooked London, in his car, sitting near enough to a lone road light, you trailed your finger across his forearm while he did the same to your knee. The low light that illuminated the car bathed your skin in amber making him feel like you were on a whole different plane of existence rather than this real proven and tangible one. Your eyes held him in place to the point where he felt like he couldn’t move though he wanted to.

Without even realizing it you were mere inches from him. In fact, you were so close he could make out the hidden colors in your eyes, so close he could smell the fragrance on your skin that went deeper than perfume. This was your essence and by God he was intoxicated. Unable to stop himself, he inched his hand higher gripping your inner thigh. A soft moan fell from your lips and that was all it took for him to press his forehead to yours like the sound was tethered to his very core.

“Y/N,” he groaned.

The sheer might it was taking to keep himself restrained was becoming too much. At this point, it wouldn’t take much for him to abandon those restraints and give in.

“Lewis,” you whispered.

Your voice was raspy and dripping with what he dared label as desire. Fuck, he thought as he squeezed your thigh. He was so close, mere inches and it wouldn’t take much to close the gap between his fingers and your core but still, he fought himself. He was so wrapped up in his own battle for control within himself that he didn’t even realize when your hand rested on his upper thigh. You were dangerously close to kicking the lid off the box of other stuff that he’d worked years to keep shut. Half of him silently begged for you to keep going and kick it off so everything would be out in the open and it would be do or die but the other half of him hesitated still. The unknown was a powerful and sobering drug.

Your hand inched higher, then closer to what was the rock-hard physical evidence that deep down, now closer to the surface than ever before, he felt more, wanted more than what was. He wanted more than he could possibly afford. Still, his hand persisted, it inched higher making your hips jerk forward. The knowledge that he’d hit a sensitive spot sent his system into overdrive making a deep moan from his lips fill the car.

On cue in response, your legs opened a few inches more, making way for his hand. Jesus Christ he thought. There was his consent, you wanted him as he wanted you. There would be nothing wrong with him slipping his fingers underneath whatever underwear you wore. Fuck, he hoped they were lacy and strappy. There would be nothing wrong with him letting your hand slide to the aching dick straining against his pants begging for your attention. Shit, he bet your hands would feel incredible wrapped around him. There would be nothing wrong with him moving closer and finally claiming your lips as his. Damn, he just knew they were as sweet as they looked, that they felt amazing. There would be nothing wrong with him pulling your body against his for more than a clothed hug. There would be nothing wrong with him cupping your breasts and swirling his thumb across your nipple just to see the reaction it elicited. God damn it, he knew your moans would destroy him. There would be nothing wrong with him finally learning what you tasted like, nothing wrong with him finally smearing your wetness across his lips. Holy fuck, he knew you had to taste like pure sugar and cream.

His cock spasmed again then your hand made the move for him. In the same breath with his eyes squeezed tight, he lurched for your hand, gripping you by your wrist stopping you just before you touched him. As he did that his jaw clenched, the only thing he could do to stifle the moan at the tip of his tongue. It came out as a half groan and growl instead. The strangled whine that left you said you liked it, and he knew he had to end this here. It took him some time to find the smallest bit of control to open his eyes, but he didn’t possess enough control to look at you. There was no way he could.

“I’ll take you home,” he said, voice low and so close to a whisper.

He tried to keep the longing, regret, and hope from it. Slowly he removed his hand from your thigh hoping with everything in him that you grabbed it and nudged it higher. You didn’t though, so he turned forward readying himself to drive. You didn’t move for several long moments; you remained there half facing him with your thighs still tempting him to go back and take things further. With his hands on the steering wheel, he trained his eyes forward. He could feel all the antsy energy bouncing off every cell of his body, he could feel all the need in him wreaking havoc on him telling him to stop being a pussy and do what he really wanted to, say what he wanted to, take what he wanted.

His hands squeezed so tightly that the creaking of the leather echoed in the intense silence in the car. Just when he was about to say fuck it, you turned away from him. You softly cleared your throat then buckled yourself in. Sighing, he pushed started the ignition then swerved out of the parked spot they were in taking the route back to the city. As he drove you didn’t speak, you didn’t even move. You kept your head turned away from him looking out the passenger window with your legs crossed away from him. Your body language sent a completely different message now. Before you were open and so close to him. Now, you were so far he wondered if he’d turned Miles’ words into truths.

~~~~~

-Y/N- 8 Months Later-

The loud ‘pop’ of a champagne cork echoed just behind you making you spin in that direction. A group was just behind you laughing and toasting to something you guessed was momentous. You sighed then turned back to the painting you were currently studying. The abstract lines and swoops looked so similar to the slopes of a body. The longer you stared at it the more it felt like an erotic image than some random lines and swirls. There was something about it that stirred something in you, something that you’d ignored and buried so deep, something you hadn’t felt for 8 months.

You drained your champagne glass then squeezed your eyes shut. It had been a long 8 months. You’d worked your ass off times ten taking on more and more clients than before. You brought on 12 celebrity clients and 4 major corporate ones which brought Halsey, Boyd, and Crenshaw to the top of the field in revenue. You brought in so much money that you’d gotten 7 poaching offers from firms in different parts of the country.

Thanks to those offers that you hadn’t necessarily kept confidential, the interest in you for partner rose to unbeatable levels. Anyone you were competing against for the position paled in comparison. Those 8 months of ass-busting work led to your name being signed on the paperwork titling you as the new partner at Halsey Boyd and Crenshaw. It was so much of a done deal that your bank account proudly embraced your new status.

With that new status came an increase in the events you had to make an appearance at as thee number 1 entertainment and criminal attorney in London. Your calendar quickly filled with meetings, speeches, appearances, court appearances, dinners, and more. You were so booked that the next time you had any schedule free time was 6 months away. You’d catapulted so far out of your original tax bracket that you’d shattered the glass ceiling that tried to confine you and now you wondered if you’d aimed too high.

“Looks like I’m right on time.”

You looked to your right and found Darius holding another glass of champagne for you. Smiling, you took it.

“That you are, thank you.”

“Of course. To you, the youngest and newest partner at Halsey Boyd and Crenshaw and in the greater London area.”

You smiled as the man who’d stuck around through your insane schedule, your hot and cold behavior, your pull you close one minute, push you away the next, your disappearing acts, your reluctance to place a label on your interactions, your give me sex then get gone rule, and more for the last 8 months.

“Thank you, Darius,” you said leaning toward him and pressing your lips against his.

Darius moaned and reciprocated the kiss, snaking his hand around your waist and pulling you close. You felt like you were thanking him for much more than the toast and the fresh glass of champagne. You felt like you were thanking him for taking your bare minimum and it made you feel like shit.

Darius pressed his forehead to yours and instantly you had a flash back to the last man who’d done that to you. In a split second, your heart rate spiked, and an intense feeling gripped you.

“You don’t have to thank me, love.”

Your reaction to the action ricocheted through you making you pull away from Darius. Turning back to the painting, you gulped down the champagne.

“It’s crazy that your firm has so many celebrity clients and that this many are here to welcome you as partner,” Darius said in hushed tones.

“It is crazy.”

All night you’d been rubbing elbows with actors, musicians, models, athletes, and more. All of them congratulated you on your promotion and wished you greater success in the future. It was touching but a little bit overwhelming. You couldn’t let on though, so for the entire night you’d been performing, and you were nearing the limits of your stamina for it. You’d been performing for the last 8 months. Shit, you’d even been performing with Darius. You’d been performing ever since you were dropped off in those early morning hours those 8 months ago.

“Y/N,”

To your left, your paralegal now turned assistant, Kemi touched your elbow drawing your attention to her.

“Hey, girl.”

“Hey, you look incredible,” she said.

“Stop saying that please, you’re gonna blow my head up so big I just might start thinking I deserve a higher position.”

She giggled but gave you a look that said “well ya’ do.”

“The big wigs are asking for you, although you’re now one of them so--.”

You snorted while rolling your eyes. “Then doesn’t that make you the big wig assistant?”

She posed then making you laugh.

“I’ll be right back,” you said to Darius as you walked off to find those big wigs.

It didn’t take long before you found them surrounded by a group of about 10 people. When they saw you they waved you over with large smiles on their faces. You took a deep breath and approached them with an equally large smile.

“There she is ladies and gentlemen!”

The group smiled, patted your back, and welcomed you with friendly banter.

“Everyone!”

The music died down and someone handed Malcolm Boyd a microphone. He was your biggest fan, a black man who’d made unfathomable feats in the field and became an incredible mentor and second father to you. He put his arm around your shoulder as he always did.

“I am filled with great happiness and pride calling this woman the new partner here at Halsey, Boyd, and Crenshaw!”

Everyone began applauding then, drowning out his next words so he paused and allowed them a few moments before continuing.

“She has been with us for 6 years now and in those 6 years she has accomplished incredible things and when she was done with those incredible things she moved on to outstanding things. Y/N has reminded many of us of what it means to be determined and persistent. She tackles every case with poise, confidence, and grace and that confidence has given her that 99% win record.”

Again everyone clapped. You softly smiled at them half embarrassed by the praise but half so damn proud of yourself and happy that your accomplishments were being recognized.

“Just as Malcome said, “Patrick Halsey began placing his hand on Malcom’s shoulder, “Y/N more than deserves this promotion and I expect her to blow all of our minds in the coming months and years. We just might have to add another name to the plague.”

Many in the audience hollered and hooted at that and you couldn’t lie that the greedy ambition within you salivated at that possibility. You still wanted more. You exchanged a look with Malcome who gave you an all-knowing look. You just found your next accomplishment. The founding partners took turns praising you and giving reasons why you’d earned this promotion then raised their glasses to you for the ultimate toast of congratulations. You humbly thanked them and gave a quick appreciative speech before lifting your glass to the audience.

As you drank down the tart liquid, your eye caught sight of a figure you hadn’t seen in person for almost 2 months—Lewis. He stood at the back in a black suit that clearly was made for him. His braids were pulled back in the way he liked when he was tackling more professional events. He looked as good as ever. He lifted his glass of water to you and in response you gave him a tight smile.

The same thing happened that always happened when you met one another ever since that night. Your body went through this strange cycle of reaction, excitement, confusion, hurt, anger, annoyance, and disappointment. It was exhausting. Because of these feelings, you regretted that night. You regretted allowing your thoughts to go so astray that you opened up your ‘what if’ box. You regretted every whisper, every lean in, every almost touch, every lingering look, everything. You even regretted getting out of his car when he pulled up to your condo instead of pulling him by his hair to you and telling him to go upstairs with you. you didn’t know what you regretted more.

The worst part was that you had to continue on like always. Normally it wouldn’t be a problem because that night was not the first night there had been many ‘what if’ nights over your decade-long friendship. The common factor was that both of you moved on and slinked back into the basics of your relationship—comfort and friendship. This time is difficult, so difficult you contemplated passing his case off to another attorney. If it hadn’t been for Malcome talking you out of it he would have been someone else’s responsibility. Instead, you put on your big girl panties and a mask and did something you never thought you’d ever do with him—performed.

When the crowd thinned out and everyone returned to what they were doing you began making your way back to Darius in the opposite direction. You were ready to leave. Before you got far Lewis stepped in front of you stopping you in your tracks.

“Congratulations, Y/N.”

Smiling, you thanked him.

“You look--,” his words stalled as his eyes roamed your body. You noted the conflicted look on his face before it disappeared. “Incredible,” Lewis finished.

His compliment made your body warm and something like hope filled you. Chastising yourself you swallowed the lump in your throat. “Thank you. You look nice too.”

Lewis scoffed softly then nodded. You then tried to slip by him, however, Lewis wasn’t having it. Again, he stepped in front of you.

“In a rush to get away from me?”

“Why would you say that? Have you done anything to me for me to want that?”

Silence stretched and Lewis studied you his jaw clenched tightly. Instead of speaking, he looked down, an act of defeat.

“Can we talk, Y/N?”

“We’re talking right now.”

He gave you an unamused look, but you kept your nonchalant, innocent one. Unexpectedly Miles approached then.

“There she is--partner lady. Congratulations Y/N.”

You smiled then hugged Miles. “Thank you!”

“This is incredible news, Y/N. So happy for you.”

“I appreciate that. Thank you for coming,” you replied.

“You know me, always this fool’s plus one.”

You smiled then the silence returned for a few seconds before Lewis spoke again.

“Maybe we can go somewhere—quiet after this?”

“Unfortunately I don’t think I can.”

“Why?”

Just then Darius approached and wrapped his arm around your waist resting his hand on your hip. You watched Lewis’ eyes drop to that hand and continued to watch as his jaw turned tight as if it filled with cement.

“Oh wow. Lewis Hamilton,” Darius said turning to you, his voice awestricken. “Babe it’s Lewis Hamilton.”

You nodded as a soft smile played on your lips. “Let me introduce you. Darius, this is one of my clients, Lewis Hamilton, and his best friend Miles Chamley-Watson fencing champion and Olympian. Miles, Lewis this is my—.”

You hesitated and in the same second, you felt Darius’ eyes on you filled with hope. Two other pairs of eyes were on you--one giving complete double eyeball emoji and the other searing you almost daring you to continue. The longer you didn’t speak, you watched Darius’ hope turn to disappointment. Glancing back at Lewis you found his eyebrow up with a curious and confrontational look while Miles was the epitome of if ‘well this is awkward’ was a person.

“This is Darius Forrester.”

You felt even more like shit now. Darius shook Lewis’ hand first then Miles’. While he did Lewis looked him over sizing him up. You knew he was wondering if he was the same man from those months ago when you’d told him you were on a date.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you, I’m a fan,” Darius said to Lewis.

“Thank you. I appreciate that. I can sign something for you if you want.”

You rolled your eyes at his underhanded jab while a half chortle escaped Miles. Darius on the other hand leapt at the opportunity, handing Lewis the only thing he had, an art bidding ballot. Lewis signed the back but kept his eyes on Darius’ hand on your hip.

“Bidding on some art tonight?”

“I am. There is a piece this gorgeous angel has been staring at all night, it’ll be my gift to her for her promotion,” Darius explained rubbing your hip.

You smiled at him then kissed his cheek. Lewis now looked entertained while Miles’ eyes widened as he finished the drink in his hand.

“Ehm, anyway. So I’m sorry I can’t pencil you in tonight but if you call Kemi and make an appointment she’ll get you on the calendar for a different day for that talk,” you said.

“Plans tonight,” Miles guessed looking between you and Darius.

“Absolutely. I’ve had way too much to drink and plan on taking advantage of that.”

You leaned closer to Darius kicking up your performance another notch. Lewis smirked but also clenched his jaw to that. Miles whistled while nodding his head.

“Go on then Ms. Partner, fly by the seat of your panties or no panties,” Miles teased making you and Darius chuckle while Lewis gave him an unamused look.

“Well, enjoy your evening gentlemen. Thank you again for coming by,” you said before you made a move to walk off with Darius.

As you walked away you placed your hand over Darius’ and slyly slipped it lower to rest on your ass. You knew Lewis was watching and decided to deliver the last blow. Was it petty? Yes. Was it fair to Daius? Not at all.

The next hour or so passed with you roaming around the gallery looking at the art while Darius flirted with you. As you roamed, no matter where you went you saw Lewis from the corner of your eye and no matter how much space was between you, your skin reacted as if Darius’ touch was his. The more you felt that way the reality that Darius’ touch was in fact all his own annoyed you making you feel even worse. You knew what needed to be done and knew it had to be done soon.

The only way you could distract yourself was with glass after glass of champagne. As you emerged from one of your countless trips to the bathroom you bumped into Miles.

“Funny bumping into you here.”

You smiled warmly, “Still here? I thought you and Lewis left hours ago.”

“You knew we were still here,” he accused.

You tried to give an affronted look but failed. He was right. Sighing, your act fell for the first time that night.

“Wow. Feels good to not perform huh.”

You looked at Miles and wondered just how much he knew. He didn’t keep you in suspense long.

“What a twisted web we weave when we practice to deceive.” He scoffed, shook his head then continued, look, I am going to tell you the same thing I told Lewis.”

You perked up then but tried to play it off.

“You better stop playing before somebody gets hurt and by the looks of it, it’s gonna be your homeboy Darius if not all three of you.”

You took in his words then put your mask back in place. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Yeah you do, just like Lewis knew what I was talking about all those years ago, but he still decided to keep playing, and now look where we are.”

Your curiosity peaked then. “What are you talking about Miles? What do you think you know?”

He scoffed. “I’m a straightforward kinda guy so I’ll say I know everything. As the neutral 3rd party who is both on the outside looking in and the inside watching this train wreck, I know everything. I know what he tells me and what he doesn’t tell me, and I know what you don’t tell him.”

Your eyes lingered and the longer they did the more you got his meaning. Glancing away you tried to pretend like his words meant nothing, but you knew you were failing.

“I get it, I really do; 10 years is a long time to put at risk but are you really putting it at risk knowing all you know? You have 10 years of proof. Man up.”

Miles leaned in, kissed your cheek, and whispered, “Let homeboy go so he can find someone who really loves him, someone who can love him. Your corner is full.”

With that, he walked away leaving you speechless and confused. Your corner was full? You had no idea whatsoever what that meant, and you were tempted to follow Miles and get some clarification, but you decided against it remembering the last time you chased down the rabbit hole. When you found Darius again his expression was somber when he told you that the painting he’d been bidding on was outbid and that he didn’t have it to gift you. After assuring him you were fine, you decided you were more than ready to leave.

Darius got the car as you waited outside allowing the cold air to cool your skin. You didn’t care that you were risking illness because it served as a needed distraction. When you felt a fabric drape over your shoulders you bristled at first but then Lewis’ scent circled you and your body relaxed. Even that annoyed you.

“I don’t need this. Darius will be back soon anyway.”

Lewis snorted. “8 months, is that a record?”

“I think it’s a record for you, but I’ve gone longer.”

He scoffed then shook his head. “No doubt, remember Y/N. I will be here long after you get bored with them all. I’m always here.”

Your eyes locked and his should have been radiating cockiness that matched his words, but instead, they were gentle, open, and vulnerable.

“Will you?”

There was no time to reply because a car horn blared drawing your attention. Darius waved at you as he got out of the car to walk around to the passenger side.

“Good night Lewis.”

You walked away from him then slipped into the passenger side. As you waited for Darius to get in and drive off, you stared at Lewis who hadn’t budged from the curb where you left him. Miles’ words echoed back to you then.

“Just like Lewis knew what I was talking about all those years ago, but he still decided to keep playing, and now look where we are.”

“You have 10 years of proof.”

“Your corner is full.”

The word ‘full’ echoed over and over as Darius pulled off. Bullshit, you said to yourself in disbelief.

When Darius pulled up to your condo you sat there marinating in all your thoughts throughout the nearly thirty-minute drive. It wasn’t until you felt Darius’ hand on your exposed knee did you realize he was still there.

“Are you okay? Want me to come up?”

You closed your eyes and took a deep breath. “We need to talk Darius.”

When you looked at him his expression said he knew just what you were about to say. Being as gentle as you could, you ended things. Although the old “it’s not you it’s me” line fit the situation perfectly. You dug a little deeper and gave him and heartfelt reason without revealing you were and had been in love with your best friend for 10 years and didn’t realize it until his feelings were already on the line. When you finished, Darius remained the good guy he was and told you he understood and that he’d expected this sooner or later. You thanked him for being good to you then began making your way to the elevators.

Halfway there you dug into the pocket of the jacket you wore and froze. When you took your hand out you held a note with your name sprawled on the front in Lewis’ handwriting.

-Y/N-

I’ve thought for months about what to say to you because there is so much to say, so much that has gone unsaid for so long that I don’t know where to start—how to start. 10 years is a long time especially when neither of us has been 100% honest with the other. I want to end that. Please.

-Lewis

You read then reread the note over and over hoping you would know what to do next but no matter how many times you did, you had nothing. So you walked back and forth in the lobby. When your phone sounded, you found a message from Lewis.

MSG Lewis: Ball’s in your court. I’m outside your building.

You froze then slowly turned and saw his car. It had been months since you’d been in a car with him and the thought of doing it again freaked you out a little. Your eyes met at that moment, but he didn’t move. He was giving you the time to decide for yourself. You turned your back to him then walked to the elevators but stopped halfway. After a few moments, you turned back around and walked to the doors only to stop halfway again and repeat the whole cycle. Still, Lewis didn’t budge. He just watched as your internal debate played out physically.

After ten minutes you stooped down and put your down, completely exhausted by your indecisiveness. Taking a deep breath, you held it and allowed your lungs to adjust. It was an action you often did to help you think and calm down. As your oxygen levels decreased your heartbeat would slow and as it did, there was always one particular beat where you figured it all out. It usually came right in the nick of time.

So you allowed your heartbeat to slow and though you should have panicked you didn’t. You thought clearer than you’d ever thought before.

“I know what he tells me and what he doesn’t tell me, and I know what you don’t tell him.”

Miles’ words came back to you again and it was then you gasped filling your lungs with air. After a few breaths, you stood then turned to the doors. It worked all the time. With your head high and back straight you walked toward them then climbed inside Lewis’ car. Without a word, he pulled off then turned back onto the streets.

~~~~~~

Thirty minutes later you walked into a penthouse suite right behind Lewis.

“Why here?”

“Thought neutral ground would make you more comfortable.”

You scoffed and beelined right to the bar, tossing his suit jacket over the back of one of the bar stools. As you mixed yourself a drink you tried not to focus on him, but you did. No matter where he went you knew. You were hypersensitive to him at this point. You’d only meant to make a glass but ended up making a whole shaker cup. You kicked off your heels, climbed onto the bar stool then plopped yourself on the countertop. Once comfortable you crossed your legs and sipped your drink.

“Where’s Darius?”

“Not here obviously.”

“You and I are so alike it’s insane,” he said as he approached you, but he didn’t come close. He stopped at the sectional couches in the middle of the large living area and then sat.

The silence in the room was thick for such a long time you began thinking about leaving altogether.

“Congratulations again. I’m so fucking proud of you. You saw something you wanted and didn’t stop until you got it. You deserve this.”

Your stomach flipped hearing his praise. More than anyone he knew what you’d gone through to get here. It touched you. Looking away from him, you cleared your throat. “Thanks.”

His eyes remained on you as if daring you to look back at him. It was a dare you had to accept. Your eyes locked and you instantly felt it. There was so much to say. Just behind him, you saw something familiar. Squinting, you made out the painting you’d been staring at all night, the painting Darius wanted to bid on for you. It clicked then, the reason why Darius couldn’t win it was because Lewis claimed it first. You scoffed, the man was competitive and dominant to a fault. You couldn’t help but be touched by the gesture though.

Lewis sighed bringing your eyes back to him, “I don’t even know where to start,” groaned, rubbed his eyes then spoke again. “Maybe I’m sorry is a good place.”

You studied him for a few moments then took a mouthful of your drink. “For what?”

“You know for what.”

That night.

Those words hung in the air, and you did your best to remain aloof. Scoffing, you shook your head. “It’s all good Lewis.”

“You’re lying and you know it. I thought attorneys believed in the truth.”

“Who are you to tell me what my truth is?!”

You hadn’t meant to shout it, but you did.

“Because more times than not our truths match up and I am sure that what happened was not all good to you because it wasn’t to me.”

“And what exactly wasn’t all good to you?”

“The way we—I left things,” he quietly said.

You waited for him to continue because there was no way in hell you were going to make this easy for him. He wanted to talk so he’d talk. Lewis shook his head then hung it backward. He sat there staring into the ceiling for almost a full minute before he looked back at you.

“I just—flipped when we were—you were—you wanted--,” he stuttered.

You scoffed again, “Don’t flatter yourself, Lewis,” you said slipping into the barstool and spinning it around so your back faced him.

“What?”

“You and I both know that none of that meant anything to you. It’s all good.”

“Now who’s telling who what their truth is?”

You didn’t take the bait, instead, you kept your back to him and finished your glass.

“You forget, I know you, Lewis. 10 years of friendship and I know you so well that it was my own damn fault that night.”

“Whatdaya know?”

After refilling your glass you turned back around then hopped off the stool and walked toward the large floor-to-ceiling window. “I know that that you were with one of your rotation chicks before you came to pick me up. I smelled her on you. That fruity aroma was all her. I know that because of that tidbit of info, none of it meant anything.”

Leaning against the window you stared down at the view of London. Lights glistened down below, and you imagined everyone scurrying to where they had to go so wrapped up in their own thoughts or existence to even suspect that it all was fleeting.

“Okay, I’ll own that bit. Yeah, I was with one of them but that was only after I found out you were on a date.”

“So it’s my fault. I was on a date living my life, so you decided to get your dick wet. Okay.”

You took another sip from your glass not liking the direction of this little talk he wanted to have.

“I never said it was your fault. It’s just a fact. I texted you because I wanted to see you, wanted to spend time with you and you were spending time with someone else, someone you probably did God knows what with hours before you saw me.”

And with that, you were done here. Finishing the glass you turned and walked to the door.

“Good night Lewis.”

He scurried in front of you blocking your path. “Wait, please. Shit! I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that.”

“Two sorries in the span of twenty minutes, cool. Get out of my way.”

“No, Y/N, please wait.”

You sighed, rubbing your forehead. “I’m sick and tired of waiting. I’ve waited 10 years!”

“You’ve waited? I’ve—.”

Lewis threw his hands up then walked away grunting and talking to himself. He looked insane and it kind of made you pleased seeing it. He always appeared so in control, so aware of himself and his actions at all times. It had all gone to shit now. You stood there debating if you should just leave and let things remain how they were until the day you both just stopped talking and checking in and it ended up going on for another 10 years until you were just people who used to know one another, people who’d missed out on something. It was then you realized you weren’t wearing shoes.

“Shit,” you whispered.

“I wanted you that night. I wanted you more than I had ever wanted anyone, including anyone in the rotation. Do you know what I was doing while you were on your date?”

“Getting your dick wet. I know.”

“I was lying on Julissa’s bed as she gave me head.”

You scoffed, “Of course you were.”

“She’d been going for 40 minutes and still I was barely hard. No matter what she did, no matter the tricks, no matter how nice it felt, barely hard. I was lying on her bed with my dick in her mouth thinking about you on your fucking date.”

You looked at him then. Those were words you hadn’t expected.

“My mind went crazy thinking what was happening. The longer that went by without you texting me the thoughts killed me. As soon as I got your message I left. No other thought, just you. I prayed to God that the date didn’t go well enough for you to let him upstairs. Then I saw what you were wearing, and I couldn’t believe I was jealous. I was jealous.”

“Why?”

Lewis looked at you then. “Because he got to see you like that. You’d dressed up for him, wanted to turn him on with that outfit. He’d spent the entire night with you. He’d had what I wanted.”

Well shit, you thought before walking back to the bar. Rather than making another drink, you took up a bottle of champagne and brought it to your lips.

“Do you know what it feels like to want someone so bad that it fucks with you and everything you do? To want someone more than you’ve wanted anything. To want someone in a way that is new to you, so new that it scares you. Do you know what it feels to have this crippling fear every time that someone is in your grasp, but not being able to resist the temptation, the desire to make them yours? Do you know what it feels like to know that you only burn this bright, this hot, this dangerous with one person, and the burn is all-consuming?”

He looked almost hysterical now. “Do you know what it feels like to want the perfect someone for you? I’m talking molded for you in every way while knowing it’s not the right time for you because you both want too much from the world and because you know that because you burn so hot, so bright that you’ll burn each other if either of you ever let go and let it happen? To know you are so similar that you will either destroy each other or ruin one another for anyone else.”

The look on his face was so damn relatable. He’d just said everything you’d thought over the last 10 years. Everything.

“I know what he tells me and what he doesn’t tell me.”

He was practically ranting now. Spewing every single thing that he’d ever thought, confessing it all.

“So because of all that you try to keep up pretenses that you’re friends and nothing more though you have countless moments where you slip up and stare at them too long, or hold them in your arms from a hug for half a minute too long, or let your hand linger in theirs or around their waist to test boundaries because you just can’t not touch them, or even find reasons to do every single thing together. You take those 2 steps forward not realizing you do because the pull is too strong, then you freak out and leap back 5 steps. You do this for weeks, months, years until 10 of them have passed and you have this huge box you’d filled with all the other stuff between you that you can’t express or fess up to until that box just gets stirred by one action, one moment--one night.”

His eyes were locked on yours. Somehow he’d traveled across the room to the bar and was standing right in front of you. Somehow he’d locked you in the frame of his arms leaving you nowhere to run. Somehow he’d managed to inflate your chest with hope right beside your thundering heart.

“Then suddenly—everything has changed, and nothing can be the same ever again,” he finished, his voice a whisper in the completely silent room.

You watched his eyes lower to your lips and your gut flipped again.

“Do you know what any of that feels like, Y/N?”

There were only mere inches between you now and the sheer proximity of his body to yours made you shiver.

“H—how long—have you—felt this way?”

Your voice quivered in a way that made it obvious to him what his nearness was doing to you.

“10--fucking years,” Lewis replied eyes glued to yours.

He took one step to you, “I’ve spent the last 8 months cleaning my life, cleaning my circle because I’ve gotten to the point where I could no longer ignore that everyone else is number 2 for me. You’re number one, Y/N.”

You were frozen in place, unsure what to say, and even more unsure what to do. He was right, your truths usually did line up and this was no different.

“And I know it scares you, shit it scares me too. All of this does. I know my life is insane and yours is about to be even more so, I get you still have things you want to accomplish; I saw your face when Halsey mentioned adding your name to the plaque. You want it and I want it for you as well as the world for both of us. Our timing can’t be any worse, but something has got to give, love, because I can’t take another year let alone 10 of this.”

You took a deep, ragged breath.

“Where--,” Lewis began before stopping and chewing his top lip.

It was a nervous tick. “Where do I—stand—with you?”

For 10 years he’d been so hard to read, so nearly impossible to gauge, and here right now in the darkness of the room you could see him as clear as day. He was oh so transparent and scared you’d reject him. Scared you’d decide he was more trouble than he was worth. Scared he’d just showed you his heart and ruined your friendship in the process. Without realizing it you were crying; you felt a tear roll down your cheek.

Sniffling, you wiped it away, “Ehm, I broke up with Darius tonight.”

Lewis looked shocked. Clearly, he thought you were still together.

“Why?”

You wiped the other tear that fell from your eye then looked away from him. All of a sudden the room felt smaller than it was, it felt as if the walls were closing in on you. Lewis cupped the back of your head cradling your skull in his palm making you look him in the eyes.

“Why?”

“For the last 8 months, I’ve been hot and cold with him, I pulled him close one minute then the next pushed him away, I disappeared a lot always using work as the excuse. I was busy, yeah, but it wasn’t work. I was always so reluctant to put a label on what we were doing, every time he brought it up I changed the subject never giving him the answer he wanted. Even when we had sex--.”

Lewis took a deep breath, dropped his head, and harshly released it, clearly displeased with confirmation that he’d had you that way, but you continued.

“Even then it was usually always on my terms, and I always wanted him to leave right after. I was—I was always thinking about someone else, something else instead of him, and for 8 months I never felt anything remotely close to what I felt that night with him. over the months every time I saw you it hacked at whatever was going on between me and him until tonight seeing you again it just--.”

You flicked your five fingers indicating an explosion. I’ve become hypersensitive to you, and I don’t know when it happened. It dawned on me that—I was using Darius and it wasn’t fair.”

Lewis searched your eyes not hiding the hurt in his. You took a step towards him. “You’re right about a few things. Our timing couldn’t be any worse.”

He nodded.

“Our truths usually always line up.”

Lewis looked hopeful then.

“Your life is insane.”

The hope faltered.

“I do want my name on that plaque, and I will get it.”

A small smile crooked his lips.

Another tear rolled down your cheek and again you wiped it away, “I can also no longer ignore that everyone else is number 2 for me. Always has been because you’re my number one.”

He clenched his jaw then and the emotion that washed over his face rocked you. Like an earthquake rocking the Earth’s surface.

“I am scared.”

As this tear rolled, Lewis was the one to reach out and gently wipe it with the pad of his thumb. Your lip quivered.

“I’m so scared.”

Lewis pushed forward then, crashing his lips to yours in one swift move. Once your lips met neither of you went slow. The kiss was frenzied from the beginning, both of you wanting it all and not wanting to waste any more time taking it. As his tongue rolled with yours you closed the space between you pressing your body against him. Lewis softly moaned, wrapping his arms around you. When you bit down on his bottom lip he groaned then walked you backward until your back collided with the edge of the bar. Trapping you there once again, he kissed you without holding a thing back and your body responded to him instantaneously.

In a matter of seconds, you both were moaning against each other and completely wrapped up in the new feelings that were consuming you. Lewis cupped your face as he kissed you then ran his hands down to your neck. You couldn’t deny that this felt even better than you imagined. Moaning, you clutched his waist but when that didn’t suffice, you slowly slid your hands up along his toned abs, over his chest taking in the bulge of muscle there. When you wrapped them around his neck, Lewis pressed more persistently against you.

“Mmmm!”

Lewis tore his lips from you and put his forehead to yours. “Fuck, I don’t want to get too carried away. I’m sorry I should have asked first.”

“Consent fucking given,” you said before you crashed your lips to his.

This time you took control. Swirling your tongue with his you didn’t give him time to react or gain the upper hand. You wanted to taste him, and you refused to wait any longer. Teasing his lips, you nibbled his bottom one, taking your time to sensually suck on it until he moaned against you. The vibration shot through you making you feel like you’d only now just begun to truly feel. Lewis’ hands roughly gripped your hips, holding you steady so you could feel that you weren’t the only one finally feeling for the first time.

Heightening both if your pleasure, you sucked his tongue until he groaned. The next thing you knew Lewis’ had you by the hips lifting you onto the bar top. You wrapped your thighs around him and nearly came when you felt his hands pry your legs apart. The heat radiating off of his hand on your bare thigh reminded you of the night in his car and you prayed he didn’t stop again.

As if reading your mind, Lewis met your eyes while he slid his hand higher and higher and higher until his fingers crawled to your inner thigh. Softly he raked his manicured nails against your skin forcing a whimper from you. You bit down on your bottom lip and silently willed yourself not to cum from the anticipation. Suddenly the back of Lewis’ fingers brushed against your sex. Your gasp was loud, breathy, and stretched out as he took his time moving centimeter by centimeter until he’d trapped your clit between his pointer and middle finger. Your jaw dropped all the while he held your gaze.

When he tightened his fingers and rubbed against you, your eyes rolled to the back of your head. You knew then he was dangerous, and you were going to cum.

“F—ha—fu-huck!”

Your back arched, head fell back as your body moved like it were possessed. Each spasm of pleasure had you bucking against his fingers until you could hardly breathe.

“My god you’re so fucking beautiful when you cum, love.”

You giggled and moaned as the tremors worked their way through you. “Mmm, orgasms and compliments, a girl could get used to this,” you cooed.

“Good. This is your future.”

Lewis moved his hand, brought them to your thighs then lifted them. As he planted your heels at the edge of the bar, you knew what he wanted. Your eyes dropped to his lips then you moaned. Pulling your dress away from your legs you allowed them to fall back to the bar showing him not only gymnasts were flexible.

“Oh fuck,” Lewis groaned.

You watched his eyes drop to your sex and the look on his face was unlike any you’d ever seen. No one had looked at you like this before. He stared where your thighs met like it was the most mesmerizing thing he’d ever seen, the first of its kind and something he wanted to completely destroy. You now felt like prey spread before him like this, like at any moment he was going to pounce on you.

“Mmm.”

Lewis came closer and closer until he rested on his elbows and was just inches from your sex. The anticipation was killing, and he had to know it.

“I knew you were a lacy knickers kind of woman,” he muttered.

“I take it you’re a lacy knickers kind of man.”

“On you, fuck yes.”

With that, Lewis hooked his thumbs in your underwear and pulled them to the side. He blew out a breath in reaction to seeing you bare for the first time and that breath fucked you up all over again. You threw your head back trying to calm your anxieties, but just when you met his eyes again you found his tongue out sliding against your wet folds.

Oh—my—goooood!”

Lewis moaned and did it again and again until he circled your clit with the tip of his tongue. “Mmmm.”

Lewis pressed your thighs back keeping them spread then went to town. If you’d ever doubted before that his mouth game was incredible you didn’t now. He licked, flicked, and sucked along your flesh making your back remain in a prolonged arch. Within seconds you were whining and writhing as his tongue worked literal fucking magic. The sound of Lewis’ slurping echoed in the living room and that was when your hands grabbed his head. Pulling his hair free you held on and bucked against his mouth.

“Mmm.”

He stuck his tongue out and let you take over. With every buck against his tongue, you called his name and the more the tip of his tongue flicked your clit the more out of control you felt. Your release was so close your body moved more wildly needing it at all costs.

“I’m gonna cum Lewis.”

“Cum for me, Y/N!”

You didn’t need to be told more than once and when you were right on the precipice you felt Lewis slid two digits inside of you. Just like that, your orgasm morphed from a toe-curling release to soul snatching one. You screeched as your body convulsed but he didn’t stop then, he pumped his fingers in and out of you then added a third finger stretching you wide.

“Uuuugh fuck!”

You barely finished your words before Lewis threw you over his shoulder, keeping his fingers inside of you. As he walked through the suite his fingers kept fucking you, readying you for him. When your back met the soft sheets of the mattress, Lewis still hadn’t broken contact. He watched you now as you lay there unable to control your body.

“You’re so beautiful.”

Pulling his fingers free he cleaned two of them off before you sprang to your knees to claim the third. As you sucked his finger you kept your eyes on his. You could see how badly he wanted you, how much he wanted from you, and you couldn’t believe he’d held back all this time. You took your time sliding each button through its slot until his shit was wide open. When you pushed it off of him you took in a sight you’d seen plenty of times only now it was different.

You brought your hands to feel across his torso marveling at each defined ab muscle and each tattoo. When you intentionally rubbed against his beaded nipple you noted the way his Adam’s apple bobbed. How had you never noticed your effect on him? How had you never taken it seriously? Bringing your hands back to his waist you undid his pants. You brushed your palm against the protruding mass straining against his pants which made him shiver as he grunted.

“Oops.”

Lewis scoffed then licked his lips and that was all it took for him to claim back some of the control you possessed over this exchange.

“Of course, you’re a fucking tease.”

You innocently smiled. “I haven’t even begun to tease you.”

“I bet.”

Lewis snuck forward kissing you one peck at a time, over and over.

“Mm, can you take it?”

“Any other night my answer would be yes, hell in an hour my answer will be yes but right now--.”

He cupped your sex with on hand and the back of your neck with the other.

“Mmm.”

“Right now, I have no control left. I’ve remained in control around you for 10 years and right now I just want to let it all go. I want to bury myself so deep inside of you there is no mistake that we belong to each other bad timing or not. It’s you and me, Y/N.”

You groaned as his words only increased the wetness between your legs. You kissed him again, then you turned your back to him and swayed your body against him. Lewis dropped a kiss to your shoulder as his hand crept around to cup the underside of your breast. You leaned forward getting on all fours with your ass poking out to him.

“Undo me?”

He didn’t move for a few moments, and you waited for him to enjoy the view. When you felt his hand rub against your ass you dipped your back lower which only made your ass poke out more. Lewis trailed his hand along your spine that the backless gown proudly showed off. Then he went to your tailbone and lowered the zipper of the dress. Peeping over your shoulder, your eyes locked as you allowed the dress to fall away from your body.

His groan was low—primal. It was all you needed to hear to know he liked the strappy number you wore that was made of fine lace. You expected him to take his time but instead, you felt him peel off the garment leaving you completely naked before him for the first time ever.

“You’re so wet for me, Y/N. So wet and so fucking perfect.”

You spread your legs further then stretched your arms over your head using your head to hold you up. As expected, Lewis flipped you onto your back making you giggle. You roamed your hands over your body, cupping your breasts then sliding them down your abdomen to your dripping core. The entire time, Lewis kept his eyes on every move you made while he pulled his pants and underwear off.

When he stood bare before you, your surprise could not be masked. You didn’t know what you’d expected in your late-night thoughts about what he was packing but you had no way of expecting this. Lewis gripped his length then slowly stroked it as he pressed a knee onto the mattress.

“Scared?”

You bit your bottom lip as you gawked at what the good lord blessed him with. It was unfair and completely intimidating.

“Now I see why everyone in the rotation was so happy being one of many.”

He snorted, bringing his other knee to the mattress between. Slowly he stalked closer like a predator with a deadly weapon in hand.

“There is no rotation anymore.”

“Oh yeah. The LH44 Harem has been disbanded?”

As he crept closer, you slid backward.

“You’re not funny.”

“So am I the first to usher in a new era—a new harem?”

Lewis grabbed your ankle then pulled you back to him making the backs of your thighs slam into the fronts of his. He then hovered over you before dropping an opened mouth kiss on your nipple. Sucking the peak into his mouth he sucked raising your back off of the bed.

“You’re in no harem. I told you, it’s you—and me,” he said nibbling your flesh.

Stared at him letting it all sink in. You brought your hand to his bearded cheek and rested it there.

“Are we really doing this? Like—for real?”

Lewis boxed your face in with his muscular arms and stared into your eyes. “I’ve told you where I stand, Y/N. I’ve told you everything that’s in here.”

He took your hand and placed it over the roaring lion etched on his skin keeping his hand over yours.

“It’s time you tell me what’s in here,” he finished placing his other hand over your left breast.

“You,” you whispered.

“I love you, Y/N.”

Before you could react or even respond Lewis thrust forward sending the tip of his hardness inside of you, stealing your breath, and every thought. A breathy gasp filled the air. Slowly he pushed forward, leisurely filling you giving you time to adjust to his size.

“Haaaa.”

Lewis kept his hand over your heart while holding yours over his as he filled you inch by tortuous inch never taking his eyes off yours. Your entire being was on fire like he was pouring molten lava inside of you with every inch he gave you.  

“Oh fu—Lewis,” you panted.

From the way his jaw was clenched, and eyes focused intently on you, you could tell he was feeling everything you were.

“How are you so tight?”

Digging your nails into his chest you tightened your leg around his waist and as if that was his last straw, Lewis flicked his hips forward filling you completely and tearing a scream from both of your lips. Neither of you moved for several moments but with every second that passed by your body blazed. Bucking against him, you slid your hand up to his throat and then gripped it.

“I love you. Fuck me. Now!”

Those words would be your ruin because he did just that without mercy and complete recklessness. Your moans and whimpers melded together rising in decibel and power until the entire room shook with the power of your screams for one another. As he plowed inside of you he didn’t go slow, he followed his basal instincts that were imprinted in his DNA, a need to claim, and dominate.

You’d never felt so out of control in your life. No matter how he fucked you, you couldn’t get enough. No matter how deep he went you wanted him deeper. No matter how he called your name you wanted him to scream it. You wanted every fucking thing he had. You wanted to leave him in shambles. When he flipped you onto your stomach like you weighed nothing, he held your ass in the air and fucked you so thoroughly you’d lost track of how many times you came. It didn’t matter because you wanted more.

He must have been able to read your mind because there was no way he could tell what you needed this soon, you thought to yourself as he grabbed your wrists and pulled you back, so he had your upper body hovering above the mattress.

“Oh my god, I’m cumming Lewis! Ooh shiiiiiit!”

He took advantage of this new angle and circled his hips as he jackhammered into you, fucking you as you did something you’d never done before—squirted. You screamed from the force of your release, but Lewis didn’t stop, he fucked you through it then torpedoed you into another one that you knew would tear you apart. Racing for it, you slammed yourself back into him relishing the mix of pain and pleasure that only intensified when Lewis bit down on your shoulder.

“You got one more for me, darlin? Cum for me. Soak this dick, pretty girl, drench me so I can fill that pretty pussy up.”

“Aaah!”

You clenched around him as you lost yourself and fell off the cliff and into an endless pit of pleasure. You felt Lewis spasm inside of you before he cursed and shouted his release doing just what he promised. Filling your pretty pussy up.

When the two of you finally collapsed on the bed Lewis held you to him spooning you while still being nestled inside of you. Bit by bit you came back to your body and slowly your body went from violent shakes to subtle tremors and a hazy feeling washed over you. Lewis peppered kisses along your neck and shoulder nipping your skin every now and then.

“Mmm. Oh my god!”

He snorted. “You good?”

“Good? Am I good? Are you—at the risk of swelling your head even more than it already is that was--.”

“Was?”

You searched for the words but couldn’t find the right ones. “It was,” you settled on making him laugh as he held you tighter.

“Naw, I was alright, you—you were,” he said making you snort.

“Shut up.”

“No, I’m being for real for real. It’s a miracle I held on that long, you feel unbelievable, so good, too good. You—are!”

You giggled then moaned, sleepiness creeping up on you.

“Don’t you dare fall asleep, I’m nowhere near done with you.”

His manhood inside of you lurched nudging your g-spot and just like that your eyes snapped wide open.

“Watch yourself, I know your weakness now.”

“You?”

“Nope, this pussy.”

Lewis snorted then flipped you onto your stomach again. This time he straddled you as he slowly pulled out of you only to plunge right back in.

“Mmm.”

“Still so damn tight,” Lewis groaned.

“You’re welcome to try stretching me out.”

Lewis jerked his hips forward delivering a bruising thrust as punishment for your your sassy mouth. It was a thrust that took your breath and made you go cross-eyed.

“Mmm, yes!”

“Oh, aren’t you full of surprises. Pretty girl likes it rough and hard.”

He did it again and again, making you hit the bed each time as you buried your face in the sheet to muffle your screams.

“God yes, Lewis!”

“So fucking alike,” Lewis said before lowering his lips to your ear. “Remember I love you 'cause I’m about to fuck you like I don’t.”

Not waiting for a reply he held your arms to the bed then delivered on his promise. Everyone else was number 2 compared to you being each other’s number 1. Nothing else mattered.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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[olivianyx]

UPDATES ON MY JOURNEY

Heyy all! I've been focusing on my senior professional medical year and it has been stressful. So here are some things I manifested effortlessly and a few things without me thinking about it. Long ass post ahead! ⚠️⚠️

1. Getting more pocket money than usual. Like my parents usually transact in my account like a $80 or $100 AUD per month. But in both feb and march this year, they transacted me $500 and $700 AUD! Plus! I occasionally find $10 or $50 cash in my classroom or on the streets sometimes (and they come lie next to my feet 😭) I'd ask everyone in my class if it's theirs, and they say no. What do y'all expect me to do? Like go and give it to the university management?? 😭 hell no, so i kept it lol.

2. MANIFESTED DIOR'S LIP OILS!! 😭😭 LIKE 5 OF THEM 😭 YOU DON'T KNOW HOW MUCH I'VE OBSESSED WITH LIP OILS 😭😭 AND I WANTED THE RASPBERRY ONE SO BAD, AND GUESS WHAT? I MANIFESTED IT ALONG WITH 4 OTHER SHADESS OMGGG 😭😭😭

3. My crush giving me hints that she's obsessed with me 😭 like she literally told me 'you're so sweet and caring, I've never met a person like this after my grandma' cus her grandma passed away recently and she was so depressed. She even had an eye infection, so she stopped coming to the uni. So i had to make sure she's alright, and met her everyday cus she needed someone real bad. Like she needed to talk to someone and get that thing bothering her outta her head. I was there all along whatever she was going through (don't come at me y'all, ik if we help someone they would say all these things but she's my crush lol so) She's also getting real close to me, like she tells me how annoying people are lol. She loves skin ship, physical touch, being clingy around me, and complimenting me 😭😭 so these are the hints 😭 like friends wouldn't do that right? Would they?? (My friends diss me right in front of everyone 😶)

4. I've always been the type to care too much for the silliest things, nowadays I don't really put my energy into it and become all anxious. My anxiety levels have completely gone down like I'm literally cool asf?? Even while being in public?? Literally yess

5. Manifested getting my hair coloured next week! and my mom permitted me! For my cousin's engagement in april, I wanna be there like the hot younger sister I am lol. I just wanna make my relatives and their kids jealous cus they made fun of me when I was younger (my younger self has been dreaming for this moment) so why not a revenge glow up?? 😭

6. Losing weight even though I eat like a pig due to my study stress. Like literally I ate a 5 course meal one day and lost 2 kgs the next day? (cus I randomly checked my weight for 2 days cus I had to submit my height and weight to the university student records)

7. Getting a natural blush on my face! Like it's such a game changer, I look like a movie star y'all 😭✋🏻

8. My teachers complimenting me for my discipline and high scores. As yk uni professors don't even give af bout students and they complimented me??

9. Getting into a new friend group! My old one was too toxic and they would always bully me (verbally) my new friend group is literally soo damn enjoyable! Like they're the cool kids of the year 😭 and now I'm one too!

10. As I mentioned in my older post that I'm moving into an apartment. We moved in and it was too difficult for me to sleep as the place was new and also there we're disturbances in the night time like stomping noises or playing loud music at night. So the neighbors there were too sweet that they introduced and comforted us that it's okay and if something's bothering us they'll take care of it. And they literally made the people who we're causing those disturbances to vacate out 😭😭✋🏻

11. My hair getting shinier! It was brittle before as I was severely anemic, now my baby hair is back and it's shining ✨

12. I overheard my parents conversing that they should make me audition for an entertainment company....like what? 😭😭✋🏻 when I asked them once years back they denied giving me a 4 hour lecture and now they wanna make me audition?? Like literally 😭 y'all watch me at the Grammy's (after 5 years lol)

13. Getting into the void on command or intention.

14. I literally get free foods everywhere I go 😭😭

15. I got free gifts from my uncle who's living in France! He works at a fashion company and he sent me perfumes and a few outfits (I can't reveal it I'm sorry)

I ONLY WAS THINKING ABOUT GETTING MY LIP OIL, GETTING CLOSE TO MY CRUSH AND FOCUSING ON MY STUDIES. THE REST, I MANIFESTED WITHOUT THINKING ABOUT IT.

SO WHAT NEXT?

I've decided to respawn to my waiting next month. I'm still scripting how my waiting room should be... So it might take time for me. So till then I'm gonna be strengthening my self concept even more, and also getting more and more excited to be in my waiting room! I want my waiting room to be like a more like a sci fi movie and a princess fairytale combined 😭 (ik I'm weird). Like I just want my favorite anime characters to be there to help me script my DR ✋🏻 So I'm kinda in a more excited mode lately to script my waiting room! Will give you updates on how my waiting room will be in a future post! So until then take care, love you, byeeee byeeee!

- olivia 🤍

[dseerie]

My Thoughts On Why Astarion Acts The Way He Does

While I'm waiting for Baldur's Gate 3's cloud status to upload, I've been thinking. I've seen a lot on social media about people questioning why Astarion disapproves when your character wants to save the gnomes (since they are also under an abusive master) or assisting the refugees and how he is always wanting a reward instead of just doing something nice for the sake of it. And I've talked with people who have helped me put this into better words. At least I hope. So I wanted to explain my perspective as someone who was abused when a kid/teen/even early adult.

I fought my abusers whenever I could, figuring if it was going to happen, I'd piss them off, which was satisfying. But if someone started issues with a different authority figure, it annoyed me quite a bit because then I have another problem. And what if my abusers found out I was involved when I wasn't because someone I was with was upsetting the authority figure? It would become just one more issue I had to deal with. Too many details and nuances to keep track of when my mind needed to focus on the first problem. It made sense to stay on the good side of authority figures to keep myself safe and avoid trouble.

For me, something had to be worth doing or my mind just went back to worrying about sh*t, back to the fight or flight survival response. I needed that reward dopamine. Getting praises wasn't doing it for me, since I would forget the good because of the bad. Trauma brain is funny like that. I needed something physical and worthwhile to make me happy.

It's the reason why Astarion is my favorite character that I connected with the most. Not because of his beauty (not that he isn't an elegant elven man. Just that it wasn't what got me to like him. I'd lean more toward Gale or Wyll if it was by appearance for the male companions, though seeing Astarion half-naked with abs was a real shocker. I seriously thought he was a skinny elf 😳), but because he reminds me so much of how I was and how my thought-process worked. How I kept people away by being rude just enough without them wondering if they should say something to my abusers. Because no matter how many times I told people outright I was being abused early on, no one helped, only tattle-told on me.

And I haven't even completed a playthrough yet. I only just got to the Elfsong before starting a Durge playthrough. First playthrough was an asexual Tav to get to know the characters and storyline (I kid you not, I made my Tav a Charlatan rogue then discovered Astarion was also a Charlatan rogue when I was in the forge 😂). As I got to know them a bit more, Astarion intrigued me the most and when Patch 7 came out, I decided to play a Durge Romance. The first Durge both traumatized me up to Act 2 and made me adore and respect Astarion even more. So yeah, I'm romancing him on this Modded Durge Romance playthrough despite Gale having an interest in me, who is the male companion I would connect with if Astarion wasn't a companion (I'm literally just starting the Underdark area and Gale is already at 100 approval while Astarion is at 79 approval. I wish I had a library, I do have a cat, and I love me some white or pink wine 😋).

This is what my perspective of why Astarion acts the way he does. He's not bad, per say. What happened to him for 200 years has made him what he is. Nobody can fix someone else, but they can be guided to help fix themselves. I've been working to fix myself since I got out of the situation. And I want to be the one to guide Astarion toward fixing himself.

Both Neil Newbon and Stephen Rooney (primary writer) did a freakin' incredible job in bringing Astarion to life and making him so believable to the point he has helped many to realize what they went through and improve themselves. Bravo, good sirs! Thank you so much!

If I think of more, I'll see about adding. For now, thank you for reading. I hope you have a great day. 😊

[liquidorcard]

Lily can't keep her own "Sympathetic" Villains rules Straight: Anthony Gramuglia edition

See Crim's edition for the rules and outlines. Here we go.

Lily's Response to Ant:

Lily's probably going to get a significantly worse score on this one because me and Ant I think have similar media diets. We begin:

1. In the book, 100% he is THE villain. The movie not as much. Still though, I think movie Hammond more than fit's Lily's criteria. -1 life found a way

2. We already went over this (yes I am still writing p.3 of my Magneto post.) -1 Anthro cow delivering your children

3. Kyubey's keeping the universe from ending Lily. How could you get closer to having a point than that? -1 timeline

4. See Crim's post. He does fail #2. Again though, by Lily's original parameters this was a valid entry. But I have to give her the point. +1 spider gets it's legs ripped off

5. I bet she thought this was clever. -1 gate keeper.

6.N/A

7. I don't even know what she's talking about here. -1

8. Del Toro sends his regards. -1 Nerdy fish man.

9. LILY HASN'T SEEN THE BROADWAY SMASH HIT PLANET OF THE APES THE MUSICAL, STARRING TROY MCCLURE!? For shame! -1 (has anyone else watched that movie recently? I'm not saying it's aged poorly, but like, it is profoundly unintentionally hilarious, watching it in the modern day. I know this was like, the whole thing back then-- leading men who were too cool for school, but Taylor is such a fucking asshole. Cornelius is the real hero of the film, and everyone bullies him for not matching their lunatic energy. #justiceforCornelius #GeorgeTaylorisoverparty)

10. N/A (Trekkies don't try me.)

11. N/a

12. N/A (I mean I feel like I've probably seen the whole Mummy franchise just through memes at this point but. Lily's reasoning here is fucking asinine though-- as per usually Ant us uniquely getting her goat.)

13. This is actually the first example that breaks rule #3. Sorry fam I love Elfen Lied too, but it's a bit of a hot mess. +1 dead puppy

14. Scar is a dead ringer to Lily's criteria. She straight up just didn't have a pot to piss in, so she just wrote "no." -1 Dwarf in a flask

15. For the record, my boomer mom has seen Ghost in the Shell. The movie anyway. -1 body on loan

16. I watched this as a kid but can't really remember anything about it, so, I gotta put it as N/A.

17. This might actually be the first time I've seen anyone else memtion this movie . . . But still. -1 burnt wheelchair

18. Not plus ultra. -1 for all

19. Oh fuck off Lily. Glass houses. -1 jutsu

20. Sai, Crim and Ant spoke pretty extensively about this one. -1 angry hair raise

21. This one too. -1 demon pig

22. Yes she is. -1 dad

23. See Crim's list. -1 Prisoner 24601

24. N/A

25. Read ANY book, Lily. -1 absent godly parent.

26. I've only read the first one. N/A

27. Lily's reason here is bullshit but I haven't seen Columbo either. N/A

28. Why not Lily? -1 Jimbo

29. YES SHE FUCKING IS LILY. Just because in a modern context her story is a lot more tragic doesn't mean she isn't intended to be a villain. Lily made up the rule "has a point," but if they have an iron clad one she just declares them not a villain. -1 head

30. OBJECTION! NOW YOU REMEMBER VILLAIN AND ANTAGONIST ARENT TRUE SYNONYMS FOR EACH OTHER!? -1 Lily if you could just ONCE try to engage with a media discussion honestly.

31. N/A. I'll get around to watching it.

32. Not in Dracula Untold. -1 Damn Luke Evans looks like he was cloned from Orlando Bloom. I can't tell those two apart.

33. DIFFERENT DRACULAS. HOLY SHIT. -1 Lily this rational is so piss poor it's embarrassing. Even for you.

34. N/A

35. Isn't he in Kingdom Hearts? -1 Ah Ha Ha Ha

36. Another non-surprise. -1 traveler on his way home.

37. I haven't played enough Kurby to know why Meta Knight is a sympathetic villain. N/A

38. I've played enough to know Lily's right on this one. +1 Deddeddeedeeededededeeedede

39. A) several characters on both Crim and Ants' lists have been protagonists. B) IT'S FUCKING COMMON POPCULTURE KNOWLEDGE DONKEY KONG WAS THE ANTAGONIST IN THE FIRST APPEARANCE OF BOTH MARIO AND DK. -1 Lily I'm fucking shocked you don't know this. Genuinely. That's saying something, considering it's you.

40. Solid Lily continues to be the worst one. -1 LIQUIDDDDDDDD

41. Yes she is. Her point is the magic is what keeps her fucking family safe. -1 gift

42. You'd probably like this movie actually, Lily. Not the book, but. Or maybe not, there's no incest lesbians I guess. -1 sexy tree

43. I'm going to give Lily the point to maintain consistency that mind-manipulation doesn't count as "a point." Before he put on the crown he's not really even an antagonist, so. He IS an example of a sympathetic villain, however. +1

44. THERE ARE OTHER ANIMALS ON THIS LIST. Another one who's spot on, so she can't figure out how to even pretend to argue against it. -1 Beauty who killed the beast

45. GODZILLA ISN'T LITERALLY A NUKE. -1 pop culture jokes don't substitute proper media analysis

46. The Kaiju Lily. Her name is the title of the film. It's not Ant's fault You're too lazy to Google shit. -1 Viking Relic

(Biollante would have been my personal pick for sympathetic Kaiju. And her dad. She would have broken Lily's first rule since she's probably not aware of exactly what's happened to her, but. Her father at least fits Lily's criteria. A lot of the Kaiju are sympathetic though.)

47. This is a perfect example as to why Lily's rules are ridiculous. John Kramer is, in my opinion, outrageously unjustified in what he does. He follows her rules though. Having a bad point is still having a point. How "well written" he is wildly different depending on the movie, but because he's at least well written sometimes I'm counting him. -1 foot

48. You haven't read Paradise Lost Lily. I know you haven't. -1 Satan crying for everything he's lost

49. God Lily I wish you'd actually read something for once because this is an even better example as to why your rules are a joke. -1 Facist Worm King

50. This is a specific example. -1 tears, it's a waist of good suffering.

LILY'S FINAL SCORE: 19/50

38% - F

Got wrong: 24

Got right: 2

Removing the ones I haven't seen:

19/39

48% - F

Removing the ones Lily hasn't seen:

15/37

40% - F

Removing the ones we both haven't seen:

2/26

7% - F

[fountainpenguin]

Riddle watches New Wish - Post #5

They're so cute...

OH, she set them up!! Here we go!

Wanda making squeaky toy noises when Cosmo hugs her is all I've ever wanted.

"We're real, all right! ... Real fairies. Not real humans."

BUDAWHAAAAAAAA-? Thank you Cosmo for just confirming elastic skin, which has been one of the most important headcanons in my worldbuilding. I did not expect you to do that for me, but... thanks?

Pfft, Wanda changing her legs.

ERG??? Is that you?

Okay, there's that "We've been retired for 10k years" implied time travel bit; I think I remember that from the story bible + early convos with my friends, so at least I came prepared to expect that.

This is either time travel - which plays perfectly into my established "Cosmo ate a time key during dinosaur times and has been running around through time unsupervised for ages" headcanon anyway, LOL - or they're flat-out lying to Hazel, seeing as the audience already knows Timmy is confirmed as a recent godkid, so... Hm.

SLDKFJSD I love how the guy who accidentally sent his baby stroller down a steep hill is wearing a #1 Dad hat. "My expensive stroller! ... I mean, my baby!" - Yeah, we're still in FOP. All the parents are terrible here.

Setting her up as loving french fries and then turning her into a fly who found french fries was clever.

Cosmo once again being so close and yet so far to his mark. Good to see him back!

Me when I return my would-be murderer's daughter, who is a bug.

I AM SO GLAD that even in 10,000 years, Wanda's small talk skills have not improved far beyond "I'm Human McRealPerson" and "My husband is a grilled cheese sandwich" from back in the day, sdlkfj. That's my girl!

oh no, the Venus flytrap gift they brought over is about to go so wrong.

Yep, she's still goin'. Talking about the carwash.

GIRL check your fingers.

OH MY GOSSSSSSH, he's dressed for a classy party in Fairy culture. Cosmorella? We thought you were dead!!

... That's an ant? I would've guessed tick.

It's a guy ant? Buddy, are you sure you're supposed to be foraging?

Let's go!!

SDLKFJSDKLFJSLKJF noooo... No, no, no, no, no... Not the thing I use to symbolize memorials for the dead, c'mon!

It IS an accurate item for a Fairy house- these were all over the place in Fairy World during the old show, AND in that color, though you usually see more than one "wand" per pot.

I'm super impressed the artists studied the old interior design customs. Huh.

Cosmo lives here. Also, BABY!!

OOH, I'm excited that Cosmo and Wanda's window overlooks Fairy World because it's kind of a portal. I did something super similar with a rat cage in an upcoming Frayed Knots scene, where Anti-Cosmo and Wanda are godparenting together during school. Nifty!

He even confirmed it's a spell on the front door! Wow. Somehow, Past Me nailed that.

"We can choose which world we go out into!" -> /Me with my 'fic where Kevin Crocker is confused that Shirley's Pizza Parlor has an exit on the other side that goes to Retroville.

Cosmo: We lived in Timmy's fishbowl for 20 years. Wanda: It was 7.

You are both wrong- it was like 68 <3 But honestly, I forgive you for not wanting to tell Hazel time was frozen for 50 years. I don't think she'd like that. Actually, I don't think she was born yet, because my vision is time freezing at the end of Season 4, and Dale was rescued in Season 2, so... Yeah, she wasn't born. Still, you don't wanna just drop that on someone.

That's actually very funny that Cosmo and Wanda are struggling because they're out of practice during their retirement.

THERE'S THE SIGN!! Way to go.

Oh, and the credits are done in a similar style to the old ones? Even the colors? That's so cute! That's also nice that Hazel's VA was a story editor too- That probably helps with the passion and vision.

That was cute. I liked it. Huge relief to see something well-researched and made with love after "Fairly Odder" was a struggle for me.

I've got a little more time tonight, I might be able to get one more episode done before bedtime.

[reallyromealone]

Heyo! I was wondering if you could possibly do a femboy/hellokitty lover male reader w/ Bonten. Like Bonten meets him off of instagram or tiktok and are instantly hooked. I'll leave the rest 2 you of u even eanna write this abomanation :p Thank you<3

Fuck it sure

♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️

It started when ran was scrolling instagram, somehow stumbling across @(instahandle) who was the prettiest man he ever saw.

Soft pinks and cute skirts was what his eyes met every post along with flirty little thirst traps, the pretty man had Ran in a chokehold.

It didn't take him long to show the femboy to the rest of Bonten and soon enough all of them were looking at all his... Promiscuous pictures and donated like crazy on his livestreams.

This would eventually catch the pretty boys attention, checking his biggest donors pages to see that they were all executive's or high high ranking to 'Sano family Trade enterprise' and were... Really fucking hot.

He didn't really care for the money aspect, it was just a bonus as he began talking to the men.

Bonten practically whispered sweet nothings to him through text, making his knees weak with their flirty texts.

Bonten was obsessed, spending all their free time texting him and even getting some adorable photos of him during his day to day and if they were lucky some more racier pictures.

'can we meet?' (name) was panicking as he sent that to them, not sure if they would find him weird or creepy for wanting to meet him...but he was just so inthralled by the men.

He's never been so wanted by people.

Sure he had his fans but these men...the way they wanted him made him feel like he was the only one.

So here he was sitting in a coffee shop that was incredibly fancy as per the men's request while sipping on (drink of choice), when he stated to the person who does the seating his Reservation...they looked startled but (name) didn't pay that much mind.

He wore his cutest outfit for them, an even cuter pair of men's lace panties under his skirt.

He was worried though, what if they didn't show up? What if that a sick joke or a catfish...

Bonten walked in and immediately went to the area they knew (name) would be in, eyes raking his being as the angel drank his beverage.

"God those pictures don't do you any justice" Ran said huskily as he slid beside (name), the rest of Bonten following suit as they stared at (name) with an intensity that would scare most people but (name) was just hypnotized by their eyes.

Why did such pretty men have to have such captivating eyes?

If the men were menaces in text, they were demons in real life.

Even Mikey was flirting in his own Mikey way.

"That's a real cute skirt" Koko commented as he played with the fabric, hands touching (name)s thighs "thank you..." (Name) mumbled, the man's cold hands feeling weird against his warm skin but he didn't mind.

When the meet came to an end (name) was completely entranced by these men and their dynamics and found behind the flirty charm they were very fun to hang with.

"I had..a lot of fun today" (name) didn't know why he felt so comfortable with the men, even letting them drive him home as Mikey "I was wondering if you guys wanted to do this again"

When Bonten saw (name), they thought he would be just a cute little play toy but now... They didn't want to let him go.

"Bold of you to assume we haven't already planned a real date"

"But this was a date?"

"Oh darling, you haven't even begun to see what kind of dates we put together"

[prettyboypistol]

Smoke and Joke || Keatlejuice x M!Reader PART 3

Part 1, Part 2

It had been a few days since you released the terror that was Beetlejuice out on the world. You had to admit, it was kind of funny to see the mayhem on the way to the grocery store and back. Nothing happened to you per se- Beetlejuice was courteous in a way like that. He knew not to mess with the man that freed him- after all, you, unbeknownst to yourself, were the key to sealing him away if you so desired. So, all chaos was decidedly two blocks away from wherever you needed to go in your daily life.

That is, until you came home one night to see Beetlejuice on your couch, drinking your beer, and smoking one of those nasty soul-cigs as f.r.i.e.n.d.s reruns played in the background.

"Y'know, you could have asked before raiding my fridge."

"Yeah, but you weren't home." He responded, puffing a claw of smoke to beckon you closer.

Oh what the hell, you'd bite. You plopped down next to Beetlejuice and took the beer from his hand, took a long swig, then handed it back.

"That's a dirty lil' habit of yours." Beetlejuice chuckled as he swallowed some beer, intentionally licking the rim to gross you out.

"Hm?" You mumble, your eyes glazed over in boredom as you watched the television idly.

"Taking things that ain't yours, toots. You don't know where my mouth's been."

"As if I'd catch something from a ghost." You breathed out a laugh. "Besides, I'm too tired to care at this point. Pass the beer again- wait, no, I need something stronger." You said as you got up to rummage around in your freezer for your vodka. It was a quarter empty.

Either you were more of an alcoholic than you thought or that bastard on the couch also got into your vodka. You looked back to him, and all Beetlejuice gave was a toothy, gross, grin. As if he could ever look innocent. Yeah, right.

Whatever, he could get you some more as a make-up later. You took the bottle out from the freezer, mixed it with some orange juice, and sat back down with your cup in hand and sipped quietly. It wasn't your favorite way to get drunk, but it was a fast way. And with the company you had over? You'd like to forget him ever being there.

"So, why are you here anyway?" You couldn't help but ask.

Beetlejuice laughed and shook his head slightly at the question, as if you were stupid.

"Why wouldn't I? I'm a bein' of pure chaos. Thought I'd spice up your life a lil- God knows you live a milk-toast life."

"Damn." You responded. He was kinda right. All you did was wake up, work, drink, and sleep.

"Besides, this place is just boring enough to hide away in." Beetlejuice added. That made your head snap up to look at him.

"What did you do."

"I mighta messed with the pipes of the fire hydrants."

You groaned and flopped your head back onto the upright cushion. "You were a mistake. I thought you were just some dumb poltergeist."

"I could be a bigger mistake." Beetlejuice snorted as he jokingly placed a hand on your thigh. You quickly swatted his moldy hand off of you.

"As if." You sneered as you fished the box of cigarettes from your pocket and placed one to your lips.

Suddenly, Beetlejuice grabbed you by your jaw and pulled you far too close for comfort. You stared into his eyes. You felt his faux-cold breath on your face. You finally got a good look at the grime that caked his face- it was moss. His grub-pale skin revolted you on a visceral level, especially the earthy smell that radiated off of him.

Although, you expected him to smell like a rotting corpse. But no, he just smelled like wet grass and dirt. Like a freshly-watered grave. Either way, you prayed that the proximity ignited your fight-flight response- that's why you hoped you heart raced. You barely noticed Beetlejuice's real intention of using his cigarette light to light your own. When he pulled away, he took a good look at you and burst out laughing.

"Oh Christ- look at you!" He cackled as he snapped his fingers to materialize a mirror in front of you. Shit, you were blushing. HARD.

"Shut up." You grumbled as you took a long drag of your cigarette. "I'm allergic to disgusting bastards."

"Awe, I'm touched, babes."

As you two smoked and drank on the couch, you couldn't help but steal glances at Beetlejuice from time to time.

He wasn't as hideous as you first thought.

SHIT. NO. NO NO NO NO. OH GOD NO.

[the-s1lly-corner]

Welcome to the cringe corner! (Masterlists at bottom)

Here you can find various content for characters of several different fandoms! This is a multi fandom blog, constantly cycling through fixiations thanks to the Admin constantly going through different interests

With that out of the way, below the cut you can find more information about the Admin, as well as the blog itself

About the Admin and Blog

Hello hello! I'm the Admin, I use (they/he/it) pronouns! For years I have read and consumed canon x reader insert content, and decided it's about time I give back to the community!

This is a multi fandom blog, with the blog changing with my interests! by default, though, Creepypasta is what I write when no interest is pushing me enough to right (and will continue to be the default for the foreseeable future, thanks to the fandom playing such a large role in my childhood)

This blog mainly focuses on short lists of headcannons for reader inserts, however occasionally scenarios will be posted as well as general headcannons!

I must say, I am not the best writer nor am I the best with characterization, so please note that some characters may be OOC

Below you can find what I write!

What I will write:

As of 12/24/23 I only take 1-3 characters per ask; any ask that exceeds that number will be put in the wheel to draw names to see who stays in the request

I write platonic, romantic, and found family

I will write most (descriptive)!readers however overly complex readers may be denied depending on the scenario

Typically I write hcs and scenarios!

You can ask for readers that are disabled or have a disorder but please note that while I will do research, I may not be able to get it perfect <\3

What I wont write:

Wont write any of the general no-no topics

This is more of a case by case thing depending on the ask and depending on my mental health at the time of it being sent, but I may not take requests for a reader who has been abvsed or s/hs

^ on the chance I do it will likely only be written as non vague/the harm is not being described in real time in the post + will be written strictly as comfort

I do not write NSFW, at most I will elude to something but nothing explicit

I do not write fics, those are for special occasion

I do not write canon x oc, due to me not feeling I can reliably portray the oc + this is where the overly complex described reader thing comes in, please do not try to trick me into this

As of December 2023 I do not take readers based off of existing media/canon characters unless I already know a character

If theres anything I'm not comfortable with I will let you know be it privately or by answering your ask

How to request:

Only send asks through the inbox, any asks sent through reblogs comments or dms will not be taken

Please only request one fandom per ask, if you want multiple fandoms please send in multiple asks

Please search the Masterlists to see if something similar to your request has been done before

I tend to write things and put them in a queue so as not to spam tags or the blog, so if your request is taking a new days to be posted that may be why! If you want to know what day your request is scheduled to be posted just ask!

Fandoms I write for/have written for! Will try to keep this updated!

Creepypasta (ongoing)

The Amazing digital circus (temporarily open)

Hazbin Hotel (ongoing)

Slashers (limited, temporarily open only for jason)

Overwatch (on hold)

ATSV (on hold, only wrote for spot)

TOH (on hold, only wrote for bump)

FNAF SB (temporarily open, only write for DCA)

Metalocalypse (ongoing and trying to get a hold on the characters personalities!)

Fran bow (mostly itward. Him, morgo, and remor are the only ones I write romantic and platonic for. Rest of the games casts is locked to platonic for obvious reasons)

LIST OF MASTERLISTS

Masterlist of ATSV, TOH, Overwatch and Fran Bow

Masterlist for FNAF SB, Slashers, and Metalocalypse

Masterlist for Creepypasta Volume 1

Masterlist for Creepypasta Volume 2

TADC Masterlist Volume 1

TADC Masterlist Volume 2

TADC Masterlist Volume 3

TADC Masterlist Volume 4

Hazbin Masterlist

The tropes list

[twig-tea]

Get To Know Me Tag

Tagged by @telomeke @lurkingshan @my-rose-tinted-glasses @he-is-lightning-in-a-bottle and @hyeoni-comb thank you all! 💕

Do you make your bed?

I like a messy bed, it feels more welcoming to me somehow. The only time I make my bed is when I'm without heat and it's winter, then you gotta do it to keep in any residual warmth! But normally I'd rather keep everything loose.

What’s your favorite number?

I....don't think I have one? Is this a thing people have, how do you choose?

What is your job?

I manage a team of Product Owners in the Operations division of a multinational company. In other words, I go to a lot of meetings.

If you could go back to school, would you?

Absolutely not. Beyond the fact that I was formerly a substantive editor of university textbooks, which included both editing the textbook content and sometimes writing their ancillaries (tests, powerpoint slides, etc.) so it feels like I took first-year Sociology at least ten times, I just don't love formalized education. I love learning but on my own terms and at my own pace.

Can you parallel park?

I can't drive at all! Technically I learned how, took lessons and everything, but never got my license.

A job you had that would surprise people?

Hmm. I was a call center person for half a day, it was terrible and I left without getting paid for the work I did because I was so eager to get out of there I didn't want to fight them for my pay (even though I needed the money which is why I was there in the first place). I hate phone calls, I can't hear well on the phone, and it was clear the call center script was designed to be exploitative. It was one of the worst jobs for me I could have taken lol

Do you think aliens are real?

I think it's extremely likely!

Can you drive a manual car?

Nope, even when I learned, it was only on an automatic.

What’s your guilty pleasure?

I'm not guilty about it but I can decimate an entire family size mac and cheese when I'm feeling down.

Tattoos?

I have 3 tattoos; one on each foot and one on the back of my neck. They form a rainbow.

Favorite color?

Blue-green! The shade of preference for any given moment varies, but anything in the region from mint to aqua to teal to turquoise will do; I love them all.

Favorite type of music?

My music taste varies widely but the common denominators are 1) fast tempo or upbeat, 2) solid harmonies, and 3) if there's a tempo or key change I am doubly sold.

Do you like puzzles?

Love puzzles of all kinds. I have a collection of jigsaw puzzles I do regularly, and word puzzles, logic puzzles, sudoku type stuff is all very fun. I don't make a lot of time for them but I do them occasionally and always enjoy it.

Any phobias?

I am afraid of falling. Not heights, but falling. The difference is: I can lean over the railing at the top of a 20-storey building or walk on a glass floor over a big drop and just feel a minor thrill, but am terrified to the point of maybe crying if I have to balance on a single step of a ladder or walk across a patch of ice. I had several brushes with death related to falling when I was a kid, and a few bad falls that caused injury as an adult, so it makes sense. Luckily I am pretty tall so I rarely have to do any kind of ladder-ing!

Favorite childhood sport?

American-style tackle football. We used to play at lunch on the pavement because the soccer kids got the field; we played in all seasons including snow, and we did it for love of the sport. I loved it a lot.

Do you talk to yourself?

Occasionally I'll provide a little commentary on what's happening aloud to myself; but I don't really have fully conversations.

What movies do you adore?

I have loved a lot of movies in my time! A few random ones that come to mind right now because I've been thinking about them for whatever reason are Saving Face (2004), Monster (2023), Practical Magic (1998), Moonlight (2016), and Clue (1985).

Coffee or tea?

Despite my username being a type of tea, in this as in all things I am a perfect Kinsey 3. Love both equally and drink a ton of both (coffee more regularly, tea in greater volume).

First thing you wanted to be growing up?

Lifeguard, I think! And then when I was in elementary school I wanted to edit textbooks (I was that kid who got annoyed whenever there were mistakes), so I did actually get to do my childhood dream job.

No pressure tags just going with vibes based on who I've interacted with recently (if you've done this already tag me in the comments!): @rocketturtle4 @visualtaehyun @sollucets @troubled-mind @jimmysea @ginnymoonbeam

[thenewrises]

let’s get fungi…get it? funky/fungi?

this account has just become me reblogging whatever i’m fixated on and indie game reviews/theories… would not have it any other way. ANYWAYS!

firstly, out of all the vn’s i’ve played, mushroom oasis has to be too three. for some reason the vibe is so comfy, even with the overhanging weirdness mychael brings. but i like weird, so it works real well for me!

but! per usual with every vn i play i’ve decided to collect whatever info i have into one place and theorize a lil bit. remember this is all for fun! not to start any debates and i’m not looking for confirmation. i just enjoy yapping and i have a bad memory so this is a great way for me to remember.

(an aside, i played lift your spirits for the first time today and i need a sequel and a hit tv show series and a movie. i love alma/vida a healthy amount.)

this game is 16+! everything will be under the cut. mushroom oasis has three days out so far so that is what this post will consist about of. mushroom oasis belongs to @deerspherestudios :3

1. The Mushroom Ring

there have been some questions and answers in chea’s blog but i like to stay guessing as much as i can with this. a few things to note is that this is not a fairy ring (think it was mentioned on the blog before) and mychael really does not like this collection of fungi.

we know this ring basically killed our pet, however in what way? we know it’s hallucinogenic, but can it kill us? like in the physical sense full in death? we never saw what killed our pet, and we know whatever the mushrooms do puts us basically to an unconscious state.

what i’m trying to say is, could these spores be creating lifeforms or hypnotizing people to do their bidding?

mychael knows about our pet, that much is obvious. but could our pet have been under some hypnotic spell? dangerous? mychael does not have qualms needed to end the lives of animals who are on their last stitch of life, just like the bunny stuck in a bear trap. the circle of life to him.

what if mychael had to kill our pet? they were under some spore induced hallucination spell and instead of allowing the cat to be taken over by these, he chose mercy. and in that sense, could the ring create hypnotic lifeforms to do their bidding? idk just an idea.

OR. another idea.

the ring of mushrooms does in fact kill. could the mushrooms use whatever prey they end as nutrition? another theme of the game we’ve seen has been hunting.

2. Where did Mychael come from?

I don’t believe we’re going to get super deep into his past, but enough that we’ll understand him more. so where did mychael come from?

if my theory has some truth and the mushroom ring is what can turn humans into mushroom creatures, could he have been a victim? i find it so difficult to believe he just spawned in one day, it’s not impossible but it seems so odd. unless he was an experiment of some kind, but i would think he might hate humans much more if that were the case.

someone on the blog mentioned how in order to get out from under a hypnosis, you are given tea by mychael. he gives the same kind for when you’re found by the mushrooms and after he hypnotizes you. that already strengthens the idea that he possibly came from that ring of mushrooms somehow. whether he was somehow grown (lol) or was human and changed, i couldn’t say. food for thought! (not mychael tho-)

3. There are others like him?

something i feel that has been implied is that it’s possible more beings like mychael exist. or… existed.

it’s not off the table that there are more like him around, it’s more of still trying to find where they come from. however, and walk with me as i shift subjects, with mychael being yandere, there are many things we still are not sure of. the main being: how violent can he be?

he’s good with manipulation and brainwashing, but we do know he tends to lean more towards being a pacifist. however, he knows how to hunt. and he does not seem to be above harming to protect.

but would he harm out of spite? anger? revenge?

someone on the blog had sent an ask to chea about how mychael reacts when asked about what family is. and one way had been almost downright vicious. mychael’s also hates that mushroom ring, which could be where he came from. so… has mychael eliminated others like him?

mychael has a lot of self hatred, so if he did get rid of people like him it would not be entirely surprising. i hope sometime in the near future we learn about that mushroom ring somehow, especially the source of his disdain.

closing thoughts

these are just main questions i have thus far into the game! maybe i’ll have more when the next days is released or maybe i’ll have answers, who knows! i hope this got you all thinking, and i am more than happy to hear what others think :)