#just a thought ive been turning over in my head today haha

[kaizokuou-ni-naru]

not specific to one piece, and i know i've only been back for a little bit now, but honestly if there's anything i'd really like people to take away from my blog it's that every language and culture has the level of complexity that could lead a person to spend thousands of blog posts talking about the details of its translation.

i think english-speaking anime/manga fans can fall into the trap of attributing a unique level of complexity to japanese as a language, you know? which obviously isn't to say that there's anything wrong with thinking the japanese language is really cool or beautiful or interesting- it is all of those things! but, like, a story originally written in japanese doesn't lose more in translation than a story originally conceived in arabic or euskara or thai or navajo.

in every story you consume in translation, there are linguistic details that will be lost, that will not be neatly translatable, clever wordplay and subtle implications that translation just can't communicate.

and my point here isn't to be discouraging at all! i love reading poetry in translation! i love subtitled films! the proliferation of art is always to be encouraged! but if there's any language or any particular foreign-language work you've ever been curious about... hey, consider studying it! why not? the world is huge and beautiful and with every new word you learn you'll expand your own understanding of the range of human experience!

[t3ag3rs]

g e n s o - 0 5.

"the thirds ones wrong.. it should be will not well.."

you sighed out answering present mics question. "thats correct!" he continued to ramble on about grammar and english. 

you put your head down and closed your eyes wishing class would go by faster. 

then the bell rang, dismissing you all to go to lunch.

"y/n! come sit with us!" said mina, pulling your arm. you laughed and walked along with her, kirishima, and two other boys. "sup beautiful im denki kamanari and thats hanta sero, nice to finally meet you" said the yellow haired boy grinning.

you waved, "nice to meet you two as well!" kirishima groaned, "im so hungry..! i cant wait to some of the yummy food!" sero laughed as he patted his stomach, "hes like a baby!" 

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───

you sat down between mina and kirishima, chatting with them as they ate. god im so hungry.... but i cant risk gaining any fat right now... im at the healthiest ive been.. i cant gain anything!

you looked down at your fingers and fiddled with them. "hey y/n, why arent you eating anything?" asked kirishima curiously, you looked at him and quickly blurted an excuse, "o-oh! i had a heavy breakfast right before i left so im still stuffed!" you chuckled to deflect any second thoughts from them.

mina nodded, "ohhhh i get that.. well make sure to eat at home kay?" you nod smiling at her, of course i will..

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───

finally it was time for the class you were waiting for. "i am here!! coming through the door like a hero!" announced all might as he made a dramatic entrance into the class. you couldnt help but let out a wide smile at him.

the whole class started talking amongst themselves at how they were amazed he was teaching them. you knew bakugou was jumping inside at the sight of his favorite hero, but didnt wanna seem like he was a fanboy. 

 "today we will be focused on battle!" you looked to see bakugou grinning, "but in order to do that you guys have to look good!" suddenly boxes of all of your hero costumes came out of the wall.

oh my gosh is that really my coustume??? you thought excitedly, smiling widely. "change and meet me at training ground beta!" all might instructed.

 you went into the girls locker room and started changing, "i cant wait to see how my costume looks on me!" exclaimed mina, as she put on her costume. you laugh in agreement and start putting on yours. 

 "ill see you out there y/n! dont take to long!" she said as she ran out giddily. you finish putting on your costume and look at yourself in the mirror, you smiled as you saw how it accentuated your muscle and curves well, before running out to the rest of the students.

you walked out while smiling, "OH MT GOD Y/N YOU JUST RAISED THE HEAT OVER HERE! YOU LOOK SO HOT!" screamed mina, getting everyone's attention. you blush and thank her for the compliment while adjusting the thigh harnesses. 

you look over to see bakugou in his hero costume and take notice of how much his body had changed. he had definitely grown more muscular and even though you wouldnt admit it, he looked good.

you held your breath as you made eye contact with him. he widened his eyes a bit before looking the other way. "honestly though.. your costume looks so good!" mina praised, " o-oh! thanks..! honestly it isnt really something i usually wear.. the skin tight crop top, and i always usually try to stay away from pants that are somewhat tight around my thighs and butt.. "

 "no way! they show off the body you got blessed with! besides the cargos accentuate your muscular thighs! i think your whole costume looks good on you!" she smiles, you blush and bow your head thanking her.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───

you listened closely as all might explained what you all would be doing today. you felt someone glaring at you and turned to look at them, only to meet a pair of vermillion eyes. you narrowed your eyes and stared back until he turned away, haha! i win asswipe!

you walked up to all might to draw your lot and see who you got paired with. letting out a low curse your paper read 'katsuki bakugou'. god you must really hate me huh..? out of all the people here this guy??

sulking internally you walked toward bakugou and stood by him silently. "all right lets see who the villian and hero will be!" all might reached into the box and pulled out your team and dekus team. "just great.." you mutter realizing you and bakugou were the villians and had to go up against deku. knowing bakugou he would target deku to try and beat him up. 

you and bakugou started heading on inside, "young y/n, young bakugou the key to this exercise is to embody villainy- think like how they would and act upon it, make sure to communicate and work together." you nod, youll only be able to communicate if someone doesnt target deku.

you follow behind bakugou into the room with the fake weapon. you walk toward it and look around to check your surroundings "hey." you turn and look at bakugou, "do you really think deku has a quirk..?" you bite your lip, "well.. we both saw what he did during the physical tests, so yes i do think he has a quirk" you respond looking at bakugou.

you noticed him tense up, "look.. just because he has a quirk now dont go targeting him whenever you can, we both have to communicate if you wanna win this- which im sure you do. so please just try and calm your temper okay?" you add, he stands still and you sigh. "whatever.. its not like youll listen anyways... ill guard the weapon, knowing them uraraka will probably try and come up here, once i deal with her ill help you with izuku"

"all right! lets begin the indoor combat training!" says all might over the loud speaker, "be careful" you tell bakugou before he walks away. you purse your lips knowing he wouldnt hold back on deku, but right now you had to worry about uraraka.

you smirk as you come up with a plan and go to hide behind a pillar near the entrance. suddenly, you hear a huge explosion, "here we go again.." 

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───

"bakugou take it easy on the explosions.. i dont think this building can handle too many" you say through the ear piece, "shut up and defend the weapon genso!" he replies. you roll your eyes, this bitch... 

you suddenly hear footsteps and ready yourself quietly, "theres the weapon! wait... wheres y/n..?" she says as she steps through apprehensively. you smirk and let your wind propel yourself forward, manipulating the earth under uraraka you made it wrap around her body, making sure to bound her arms down knowing if she touched you she could make you float. "right here!" you say as you wrap your tape around her, successfully capturing her.

she looked at you with a blank look still processing what just happened, "wait what??" she says questioningly, "sorry to get you out so early, but i really dont trust leaving bakugou with izu" you say before hearing another couple of explosions. 

"bakugou! where are you?" you ask through the earpiece only to get no reply, just great..! no reply from the asswipe!

you run out and touch the floor closing your eyes, you saw the floorplan of the building in your mind letting the earth draw it out for you. you felt a huge surge of motion coming from a specific side of the building and ran to the location as quick as you could.

suddenly all might came over the speaker again, "use that power again bakugou and ill disqualify your team! you need to be aware of your surroundings and strive to make the least amount of damage to it as possible!" 

oh my god theyre gonna kill each other...!  you closed your eyes and pushed your legs faster trying to get there quicker. you heard another couple of explosions and widened your eyes.

 you werent gonna make it in time. 

stopping, you placed your hand on the ground again and found where they were in your mind. deciding to test your quirk, you focused on the spot and found the wall closest to the area. maybe.. just maybe.. i can manipulate the earth and get myself there by moving through the walls..

you focused all your power on the walls and let yourself fall into the earth, the next thing you knew you were in the same room as the two. they were standing in front of each other, izuku was screaming at bakugou and your gut told you to move in between the two. the next thing you knew your feet were moving, and you were hit by both their quirks. 

you let out a loud yelp of pain and fell to the ground. you heard another thump and saw izuku fall to the ground, wincing you crawled your way to him and wrapped the capture tape around him before you passed out. 

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───

you blinked your eyes as you familiarized yourself with light and winced as you tried to move. "there, there, take it easy... your bodys pretty beaten up... taking those two powerful blows wasnt very smart of you to do.." explained recovery girl, you let out a sheepish smile, "i couldnt just stand there and let them kill each other.. ive known both since childhood and bakugou isnt one to hold back when it comes to izuku.." you explained.

"hows izuku..?" you ask curiously, "hes already back in class, i still need to heal a couple other of his injuries but he has no energy in his body left for today.." you nod, "can i go back go class..?" she nods, "yes, but make sure you come back tomorrow.. i bandaged the blow on your stomach, but it still needs a bit of healing.. keep the cast on your arm on till tomorrow" she explains before letting you go.

you limp slightly as you walk back to class, gosh itll be so embarrassing walking into the class knowing they saw me pass out- yet again..

opening the door you walked into the class, only to be bombarded by kirishima, mina, and a couple of other students. "oh my gosh y/n you were so kick-ass!" exclaimed mina as she threw her hands around you, "be careful mina! shes still a bit injured!" reminded kirishima, you smiled before waving it off, "im fine.. im just glad everyones okay..!" "that move you pulled where you moved yourself through the earth was awesome!" praised uraraka.

"wait.. wheres izu..?" you question as you couldnt find him in the room, "hes talking to bakugou.." sighs out uraraka, you widen your eyes and run to find the two outside.

gasping for air your finally reach the two, "thank goodness i found you izu..!" you say tiredly, "my gosh y/n... are you okay?" you smile before nodding, "im fine, nothing too major..! im glad your fine though..!" you pause and turn to bakugou, "look bakugou.. as much as i understand your frustrated, you had no right to try and kill izuku in a practice match!" you sighed as you looked down.

"we used to be good friends.. just because of certain values we had we stop being friends.. whatever happens this year- i promise you two this, im not sticking up for either of you. you guys can either die fighting each other because of your massive egos, or learn how to grow up and act like mature people." you grit before turning and limping away.

you knew in your heart that you still valued the friendship you had with them, but you werent going to let bakugou continue and treat deku like shit just to fulfill his ego.

previous parts: pt. 0 0 / pt. 0 1 / pt. 02 / pt. 03 / pt. 04 next parts: pt. 06 / pt. 07 / pt. 08 / pt. 09 / pt. 10 / pt. 11 / pt. 12 / pt. 13 / pt. 14 / pt. 15 / pt. 16

[sugawhaaa]

Felix X reader

{Part. 2}

"Just friends."

Pairing::bodyguard!Felix x famous!fem!reader

Warnings::little tiny bit suggestive at the end

A/N:: sorry this took so damn long to finish I just kept writing it in little pieces 🧍

Taglist:: @binnies-minsung-fanclub @btsarmy-7s-world

You woke up the next morning and it took you a long while to remember what was going on. A man in your bed? In someone else's bed? Oh yeah…

You essentially regained conscious but laid in bed trying to fully awaken. Then you felt the warm presences behind you vanish and the sound of Felix groaning as the sheets fumbled around. You listen to the sound of his heavy footsteps heading for the bathroom. When you heard the door shut you looked at your phone, 11am and 20 million messages from your mother.

You sat up in your bed, blankets still covering you as you read your mother's messages. To sum it up she said you have free rain today. As long as Felix is by your side and you don't get lost etc. She trusts you finally, at the age of 18. You turned your phone off and set it on the nightstand and looked over at Felix's side of the bed. His pillow ruffled, phone unplugged, and the few things on his nightstand either gone or moved.

You assumed he had been awake for a while. You sighed and looked up at the ceiling. What are we going to do today? You thought to yourself when you heard the door open. Felix stepped out with his hair a mess, fluffy and chaotic. In his hand he had some cream it looked like, he probably used it on his face considering how shiny it looked.

"Oh she's awake," he smiled as he walked over to you.

"Sort of..." you groaned as you slid back down into the blankets. Felix chuckled and started trying to work out the coffee machine. Eventually he got it figured out and asked you if you'd like some. You nodded and thanked him before getting up and stretching. "I don't know if my mom told you but we can pretty much do whatever today,"

After that you and Felix had a pleasant coffee party at the window cill. You then checked a bag that your mother dropped off for you. It had a lot of food but nothing really breakfast worthy. You informed Felix of this and he told you that there's a very nice breakfast joint nearby but you'd have to take the city bus there. You agreed to eat out there and started getting dressed and dolled up.

"I've never been on a city bus without my parents before," you said as you curled your hair.

"Really?" Yongbok said as he brushed his own hair. You finished a curl of your hair and nodded.

"I hardly know how to even use it," you laughed awkwardly. As you and Felix walked to the subway station he explained the basics about it and you caught on quickly. When on the train it was a little awkward but you managed to survive and arrive at your destination. A big city with lots of people and shops. You took it all in with one big deep breath before looking up at Felix. "So where do we go from here?" You smiled as you tilted your head.

"O-Oh we just went over this way a bit. It's been a while since I've been here haha~" he chuckled as you made your way over to one side of the street, there you made your way over to the breakfast joynt. You walked in and it was the cutest restaurant ever! It was red and gold themed and all the seats were styled to look very cute. You picked a table near the window and sat in front of Felix, the eye contact with him making you blush. Then a waitress came over and gave you glasses of water and the menu. Felix thanked her before she left to go attend to someone else. You picked up the menu from the table in front of you and tried to gather all the English you knew. You got some basics out of it but still struggled to understand most of the food. Felix on the other hand had already decided what he wanted.

"Can you read everything alright?" He said leaning over the table closer to you. You blushed a little.

"Um not really," you chuckled and Felix described all the dishes to you in Korean. You tried your best to listen but his visuals were just too distracting. You thought to yourself about having a crush on him. He was very kind, hot, and overall a great man but the potential of this feeling being mutual was low. 

"So do you know what you want?" He smiled up at you and you panicked. 

"I think I'll get the basic um," you pointed to the English words that described what you wanted.

"Egg breakfast?" Felix read the words you were pointing at and you nodded. "Alright, now we wait for a waiter to come here." He laughed, his freckled cheeks swallowing his eyes. You awkwardly waited before the same waitress to come back and asked for your orders. Felix did all the talking for you and you thanked him. "No, no I'm happy to help and it's just my job,"

He always says "it's just my job," but he seems rather outgoing for it to be "just his job"

As you waited Felix took a selfie with you and you had some idle chit chat. Once food arrived you dug in. The food was great and you left a tip for the waitress. After leaving the dinner Felix suggested you hold his arm.

"Huh? Why?" You asked innocently not meaning any offense.

"This street is really busy and if I lose you it'll be hard to find you again," he explained before locking his arm around yours. "I hope it doesn't make you uncomfortable," he chuckles and you shake your head. As your walking through the line of shops you spot an adorable set of jeans that are big and have hearts bleached into them. Your eyes light up and you drag Felix inside with you. Felix doesn't take much liking to your fashion taste but he does appreciate the beauty of it.

You then found the size of jeans that matched you and started browsing through the store. A few cute shirts and a summer dress and you were in the dressing room. Every outfit you tried on you showed Felix and he'd always leave nice and some honesty. But after he did mention something he'd say "I don't think that color looks great but get it if you'd like of course~♡" You greatly appreciated his kindness until.

You were in the dressing room and you bent over to get the next shirt you were going to try on when you felt your bra give out. You thought the band had just come undone but when you slid your hand up your shirt you notice it was broken. You panicked for a moment when Felix knocked on the door.

"Everything okay?"

You stumbled over some words and ideas before replying "I'm gonna let you in but promise not to freak out," you said before quickly opening the door and slipping him inside.

"So what's the problem?" He asked innocently.

"Well you see...my bra broke. I think..." you blushed as he thought for a moment. "And they don't sell any here so don't think about that either..." you bit your lip in stress.

"Here take it off and you can use my jacket to cover yourself until we get back to the hotel," he said calmly. He was very relaxed and had everything under control. He turned around and let you change and take off your bra. He handed you his jacket and you slipped it on with embarrassment.

The jacket smelt like him. It was warm and smelt of coconut? Maybe some oatmilk in there. You discreetly smelt his jacket before he left to pay for your items. You followed him out to the counter and you gave him your card. One swipe later and you had all these cute clothes! You thanked him for taking you out for a treat and he said it was really no problem and he enjoyed the time out too.

On the way home he held your bags and you got tired of standing on your feet so you called one of your parents personal drivers and got him to pick you and Yongbok up. The two of you sat on a bench as you wrapped Felix's jacket around you. It was quite awkward. You just sat there slowly swaying your feet as Felix's blonde hair blew in the wind. The view was beautiful. You were admiring it when a car pulled up to the two of you.

The two of you got in and drove back to the hotel. Once you got inside you changed your clothes and laid down on the bed. Face into the pillows. You then felt some weight on the bed next to you. "Tired?" Felix said softly.

"Yeah," you groaned back. "I just wanna relax for a bit," you mumble. Felix understood and laid down next to you while looking through his phone. His presence relaxed you, but you also felt butterflies around him. Like stage fright but different but you don't want him to go away! You felt your cheeks getting hot as you day dreamed about him.

"Everything alright dear?" He asked as he leaned forward.

"Y-yeah just trailing out into thought haha~" you sat up and grabbed a book from your suitcase. You sat next to Felix on the bed and started reading.

"Watcha reading?" He asked leaning over to look at your book.

"Merupuri," you smiled.

"I've never heard of that series. What's it about?" He seemed interested and he set his phone down.

"It's about a prince who runs into this girl but he's in a whole new world. Before getting banished into earth he had a curse laid upon him. He is very young but when in darkness he grows older. About 10 years older." You explain and Felix keeps listening to you. "It's the girls job to watch over him because she picked up this magic mirror thingy haha~ the way to break the curse is to kiss the boy but she's love sick and saving her first kiss for the boy she truly loves,"

"I see she's playing hard to get," Felix chuckles.

"Pretty much. In the end the girl falls in love with the boy and breaking the curse. It's kind of like a forbidden love." You smile at him.

"Sounds like a cute story," Felix smiles before going back to his phone. He was scrolling through Pintrest and saving the occasional photo.

"This is kinda weird but do you want to play a boardgame?" You said as you set down your book.

"Sure, anything you want dear," he turned off his phone and set it aside. The two of started playing dominon on the floor of the hotel and the first round didn't last long but the second round went on for at least 2 hours. The two of you had plenty snacks while playing but it got to a point where you needed something like a dinner. Felix ordered some door dash for you and it wasn't long before the two of you dug into the food.

This whole trip Felix had been treating you like a princess and it had your heart fluttering. As Felix was cleaning up the garbage from dinner in his skinny jeans and baggy tank top. There was a knock on the door. You got up and unlocked the door to see your parents. Your mom gave you a big hug.

"Did Felix treat you good today?" She said with a smile.

"Yup, he spoiled me," you chuckled.

"Oh good, good," she said before kissing your cheeks. She then looked at Felix and gestured for him to come over. She gave him a little hug and gave him his paycheck. "There's a little tip in there too," she smiled in her boogie fur jacket. Felix bowed and thanked her before your parents went back to their own room.

"I'm getting quite tired despite how early it is," you sighed as you laid on the bed.

"Then go rest," Yongbok smiled.

"But I will wake up at like 5am," you chuckled as you felt Felix's presences behind you.

"I'm going to get changed don't turn around," he said out of no where.

"Oh-okay," you chuckled.

"Why do you sound so distraught?" Felix said softly.

"You just surprised me. I didn't expect you to say that," you giggled as your feet swayed in the air.

"I trust you, I mean there's not much to look at anyways," he said before clearing his throat. "But um, do you mind if I keep my shirt off? I don't know what it is but I'm so hot" he said awkwardly.

"Sure, why don't we turn the AC up," you began to stand up before Felix spoke.

"I still don't have pants on!" He said with panic.

"Sorry I forgot," you said before stuffing your head in the pillow to cover up the blush on your face. You heard him put on some shorts and he walked over to the AC.

"You can look now," he said as he pressed some of the buttons on the air conditioner. You rolled over and looked at his back. His bare skin turned you on way more than you'd like to admit. "Is that too cold for you?" He turned around to find you staring at him.

"N-No that's just right," you smiled with pink cheeks. "I'm gonna change too, so turn around," you blushed and Felix spun around to look out the window. You changed into some pajama shorts and decided to keep your shirt off, only your bra on. "Okay I'm done," you said and started preparing for sleep. You noticed Felix blush as you bent over to pull down the sheets, your cleavage exposed.

"I uhm I need to go the bathroom," he said as he started heading for the bathroom, "I'll be right back," he shut the door behind him and you laid down in the sheets.

When Felix returned he went on the opposite side of the bed and turned off the lamp. "Goonight love," he said and you felt your cheeks get hot.

"G'night felix," you said before rolling over and looking at his back again. The way it raised with every breath he took. "You have nice skin," you whispered as your hands went to touch his back.

"You think so?"

Your hands haulted at his words. He turned to look at you with big doe eyes and a smirk. He picked up your hands and caressed them softly with a gentle smile. You noticed his eyes traveling down your body before looking back at you in the eyes.

"You know I'm not just hot..."

To be continued

[fcknstar]

,, missing you "

zachorfman x fem!reader

a.n. : ngl, i literally see zach as a subby brat. i have not been posting alot, m vv sorry.. i realized theres not much zach imagines and ive been quite obsessed with him bc why not. OH AND ITS DANE DEHAAN BDAY!! i wrote this with couple more for his bday, meaning ill be quite active today. my taglist . AND I MADE A FEW GIFS OF MY OWN HAHA THIS TWO ARE SOME OF IT!

warnings : MINORS DO NOT INTERACT, car sex, public sex, p in v

**lowercase intended**

being away to study abroad was a challenge that you and zach had to overcome. the loyalty, the trust and faith, the long distance. despite it being hard, you two managed to overcome it. 

after three full years of being away from each other, zach felt even more needy to be near you. every day he had to look at pictures of you and touch himself, pretending that its you. he thought itd be easy for him, thinking itd be an easy task. but no. 

when the day finally came for you to return, he couldnt help himself but tried to dress up just for you. 

he woke up at six am, which was far too early as your fight lands around ten. he brushed his hair the way you liked, wore such tight clothes the way you liked, sprayed on such a strong woodsy cologne you often complimented him on. 

it excited him knowing that you are finally coming back and his parents couldnt stop him from driving to your apartment. 

standing outside your door, he hesitated. it was a very different feeling for him. not seeing you for years changed the way he felt about you. have you changed for the worse or for the better? how will you accept him if you spent three years being around 'hot campus guys'? 

it was as if you knew he was standing right outside your door, swinging your door opened. zach felt as if it was the first time he took you on a date. you looked more beautiful than ever, you grew you hair out, probably had some layers. the way you dressed. he wondered if you had dressed up for him. before he could even say anything, you jumped in for a hug. feeling your warmth made him feel safe. the way you knew how to hug him, the way you buried your head in the crook of his neck. reciprocating the action, he held on tight to ypur waist as if you were going to leave him. he was the first to say a word. 

" i missed you. " zach whispered. 

" i missed you more. "

" hey, i heard theres this new diner in town.. do you think you can bring me there? " you pulled away from the hug, looking at him with wide doe eyes. 

grining boyishly at you, " im supposed to ask you out.. not the other way 'round. " its been a long time since he has heard you laugh. yes, you both do call daily, but your laughter feels more angelic in real life. 

getting in the car, zach feels more heaty than ever. seeing you in that filthy dress even if it looks innocent. 

" you alright? " you looked over at zach who had not started driving. it concerned you when he started to face you without an expression in his face. 

the next thing you know was that he pulled you closer to him, starting to kiss you needily. he wanted this to last longer, and maybe turned into something more than just a kiss. pulling you over the tunnel console, right onto his lap to get closer to you. you started grinding against him, feeling more horny than ever.

“ fuck..zach. may i? “ you felt his dick getting harder by the second. this was the reward you got after not being to see or even touch each other. 

“ mhm.. “ zach whimpered breathily. 

lifting yourself up to get to his zip, you saw through his tight jeans and saw a very obvious bulge. 

“ fuck ( name ), please? “ it was as if he was going to explode. he was finally going to get the real thing after years and the thought of it could make him come on the spot.

“ shh, i will get to it. be patient. “ another groan came out of zach.

finally pulling down his dick, you could see how restless zach became. his red tip dripping with precum. you were already wet enough and your slick cunt was able to act as a lube, making it easy for zach to get deeper into you. it was as could imagine his tip pounding against your cervix with how quickly you felt dizzy. the unfamiliar yet familiar feeling in your stomach began to catch your attention, zachs pounding didnt falter. him gripping onto your waist pushing you down his dick every time he pounds into it. stopping yourself from coming, you wanted to make full use of this. it was when zachs movements became sloppy. 

zach was very much vocal but had to bite his lips in order to not attract attention. connecting your lips with his, you muffled his moans. he didnt even want to try to dominate you through the kiss, surrendering himself to you without a single thought in his mind but you fucking him endlessly. releasing from the kiss, you started attacking his neck with sweet kisses he didnt want you to stop. he felt his pleasure intensify, you ducking on his sweet spot and you fucking him raw.

“ f-fuck ( name ).. m gonna come.. c-cant hold any longer. “ zach whimpered. looking up at him, you nodded, “ do it with me. “ he desperately wanted to you to continue kissing him. 

coming together, you sat on his lap with his dick still buried deep in you.  

[randomoranges]

i was going to keep this for M2 day. in fact, i did not think i would finish this part in time. yet, in one sitting, i managed to write it it all. it was super smooth and easy. i had forgotten how that could go. writing has been hard recently and ive been trying to get back into it slowly without pushing myself. so the fact that i was able to go at it in one shot surprised me. therefore, i figured i could celebrate and post it today. will i be able to write the next one in time for m2 day, who knows haha but i have other things for that

anyways, can't believe it's been nearly a yr since i last updated. ive had this scene on rotisserie in my mind for ages. this fic has lived in my head for years. will i ever finish it is the real question haha

amnesia au part 195

About an hour or so later, Edward offered to drive Étienne home. Étienne refused at first, not wanting to bother him, but Edward had insisted, saying that it was late and that he didn’t like the idea of Étienne having to wait for a bus and aggravating his leg. It was cold as well and Edward knew how much Étienne did not like to be stuck outside any longer than necessary. Plus, it meant they could spend a little bit more time together and Étienne was not about to say no to that.

The drive back was pleasant and Étienne wasn’t apprehending being back in the apartment that never quite felt like home as much as he normally did. Maybe it was the turn of events of the evening that had put him in a better mood, or maybe Edward reaching for his hand at every red light made it all the better, he didn’t know, but he wasn’t about to complain.

When they finally made it to his place, Étienne thought for sure that Edward would wish him a good night and then be off, but instead, he was surprised when Edward parked the car and then made to get out.

“I’ll walk you to your door,” he explained when Étienne offered him a quizzical look.

And okay, Étienne was charmed by the utter gallantry of it all.

“You don’t have to,” he deflected for good measure, but Edward waved him off and went as far as going to open the door for him. It was a good thing it was dark out, for Edward wouldn’t be able to see the flush on his cheeks.

“As cliché as this is going to sound, I had a really nice evening and I’m glad we’re giving this another shot,” Étienne said once they made it to his door as he fiddled with his keys not sure exactly what the protocol was. Part of him wanted the evening to linger just a little more and invite Edward inside, but he was also tired, he needed to feed Mercury and he had medication he needed to take. He knew he could do all those things with Edward present, but he also wasn’t sure he’d want Edward to leave again or that he was ready for Edward to see him go about his nightly rituals.

“Me too.”

Edward reached for his hands again, stilling them in their nervous movements and Étienne focused instead on Edward and he couldn’t help but smile timidly at him. He felt like they had gone back twenty years ago, when they’d been a little bit awkward and unsure around each other, but he didn’t mind and thought that this was endearing in its own special way.

If this was a cruel dream, then he never wanted to wake from it.

“Are you free on Wednesday? Maybe we could go out for dinner – nothing too complicated.” Edward suggested, still holding on to Étienne’s hands, their warmth a source of comfort. Maybe Edward didn’t want the evening to end either and he was stalling with time, looking for excuses to stay just a little bit longer.

“Like on a date?” Étienne asked, his lips curling into a smile.

Edward laughed, “Yeah, like on a date.”

His laughter was contagious and Étienne nodded, giddy. He didn’t think he’d ever go on a date with Edward ever again and he could only hope that it would go better than their last… (It had to. Lord, it absolutely had to.)

“Perfect; we can figure out the logistics over the week. I’ll let you get some rest.”

Before he could go, Étienne tugged on his hands and then pulled Edward to him for a tight hug. He could do this again, after all. They were going on a date. Edward had kissed him. They were giving each other another chance.

It was as if Étienne was realising the magnitude of everything that had happened over the course of the evening at once and he was frankly a little dizzy by it all and so he held on to him and furrowed his face in Edward’s neck for the briefest of moments while his mind calmed down.

“Text me when you get home, please?” He asked when he resurfaced, settling once more on Edward’s face. He was still handsome – would probably always be in his biased opinion and he couldn’t help but be a glutton for a caress he hadn’t been able to give in far too long.

“Of course.”

Edward knew he’d worry otherwise, some leftover trauma from the accident, and honestly, Edward couldn’t say he blamed him. He’d asked Étienne once what he’d done when they hadn’t really been talking and Étienne had admitted that even then he’d worried, despite trying not to and telling himself that it was no longer his problem.

“I guess I’ll see you on Wednesday then,” Étienne told him, soft smile back on his face.

“And I hope to hear from you before then,” he teased, making Étienne laugh.

“Of course,” he parroted back and then, because he could again, he pulled Edward close for a kiss that Edward was more than happy to return. He was quickly getting used to these again and was only a little disappointed when they both stepped back.

“Drive safely,” he said as he watched Edward head back towards his car. He bit back other words that threatened to spill from his mouth and swallowed them back. There would be time to reintroduce them later. He waved at Edward as he entered the car and only once he had driven off did he go inside, happy to find Mercury.

Étienne distracted himself with his little odd tasks as he waited for Edward’s text, even managed to take Mercury out for a quick walk and by the time he was back home for good, he found a message on his phone waiting to quell the small thrum of anxiety that had settled in him when Edward had driven off.

“Back home safe and sound. Sweet dreams x”

He smiled to himself, relieved, as he settled in his couch, Mercury using his lap as a makeshift pillow before he answered back.

PREVIOUS: CXCIV CURRENT: CXCV NEXT: CXCVI

[drawnaghht]

Gotta post about this b4 I forget about it but basically;

went on TVtropes yesterday, found the SRTUC page again, started adding to trivia and though, hmm, I've been getting "earlier anthro action cartoon" vibes from this show for a while now.... wonder why that is?

and guys, adding some of the art peeps there no the TVtropes trivia, I noticed that supervising producer ben jones actually worked on SWAT KATS as a character designer for 3 eps! what a connection to make!

my brain at that moment:

edit 1(27.06.2023) - ok, turns out I just mixed the actual show up with this show.... but it's sorta nice for me bc I like reminiscing about Swat Kats haha xD

on with the old post!!

actually, swat kats is a cartoon I was obsessed with for a while as a kid after we got access to cartoon network and they started airing it here. i think it'd seen a dubbed version of it before but it was exciting to see the english original, . it was fun and rompy as I remember, but also I loved the music and action elements after bikermice ended and I missed it so much, seeing something with similar musical cues felt like a consolation almost, like "oh there's more cartoons like this". now admittedly, i don't really remember that much abt swat kats anymore. it aired alongside other H-B cartoons and there was a lot to watch and pay attention to, so i kinda haven't retained more of it than memories of memories of loving the intro, memorizing the music and feeling cool while watching it. I remember the shift to more "serious" storytelilng (if I remember it right at all lol) and both feeling a bit critical/apprehensive at Callie (bc I'd thought, "why is she the only one who gets a more human-like appearance) and loving her design/fawning over her ("oh no, girl hot") but also it was just interesting to see a girl character given a mayoral role which made her seem more important than I'd seen from other action cartoons directed at boys so far.

like, i need to rewatch this series now that I've seen the cast/crew list, and just see also what it was about this show that I loved so much it left some kind of artistic impression on me.

lol idk what other connection with SRTUC it has, but when I'd read that Ben Jones was on it, I suddenly also thought, "well, not it makes sense why the antrho designs in samurai rabbit actually makes sense" There are so many shows, comics and so on before which have made different kinds of attempts at anthro/furry designs, and they all might make sense within the context of their show/media piece, but what I liked about Samurai Rabbit was how it didn't "humanize" the animal designs *too much*. Resulting in awkward designs where women look much more human than their male counterparts. which might not bother a kid much, but will bother an artist like me concerned with consistency lol. like in the og usagi yojimbo it makes sense how the animals look a little more human depending on their role or function in the story/scene, Stan Sakai is very good at making his cartoony style work with these ideas of "basically human, but represented by animals" but also literally animals. And I like that the show takes this same idea and runs with it in it's own way.

All this to say - Experience builds on experience.

so Ben Jones and many other veteran animators/artists/writers in the field working on it, but also the numerous visdev artists, animators and other visual folk with similar vested interest in a UY adaptation, give this show such an unique flair among other furry/anthro shows.

sdfsdf ill continue writing this later, I am soooo exhausted after work today, but, this was cool to think abt yesterday and ive been mullting it over in my head during quiet hours. so cool to have a brain that keeps noticing all these names and all these similar things and then running with it. like the animated things you like are so connected thru their staff knowing each other or having worked on same/similar things before, you wouldn't believe it if you didn't see it all the time.

[riridontneedya]

IMPERIUM✨

Pairing: Draco Malfoy x Any house Reader, Harry Potter x

Wordcount: 4,210

Warnings: SMUT, ANGST dom ,sub, daddy ,oral, teasing ,praise, spitting , chocking etc run of the mill smut.

A/N : Well the time has come I've finally given in.. I say finally didn't take much conviction lol. Anyway in this universe Dumbledore is still very much alive and no-one tried to kill one another so all is well. As always enjoy and let me know what you think xx

Summary: Draco and y/n battle it out for the new position as headmaster but what happens when they are made to work alongside one another

“Ladies and gentlemen, if I may have your attention please” spoke Dumbledore. He arose from his chair gently tapping his knife against his chalice in order to garner the crowds attention . Shortly everyones eyes were fixated on him. He cleared his throat and began. “I would like to thank each and everyone one of you for coming out tonight … as we all know its been a tough decision for me to step down, however! .I have no fear as I know the school will be in the safest of hands. I hand picked these two myself and in-fact trust them with my life. I know they have been working tirelessly day in and out to ensure not only my trust .. but all members of committee and most importantly our students. So with that being said when it is revealed in tomorrows assembly who the new headmaster and deputy are I want you both to know ,no matter the outcome I am so proud of you both, so let us raise a toast to our candidates . Y/N Y/M/N Y/L/N and Draco Lucius Malfoy”. With that Dumbledore rose his chalice high in the air smiling warmly at the pair. Everybody followed suit and raised their glasses high in celebration.

Draco and Y/N graciously thanked everyone as they showered them with words of praise and encouragement . Just then Y/n went to speak however her words were abruptly cut short by Astoria. As if an eager child unable to contain her excitement she blurted out. “ Draco and I are so grateful for all the support, so as a thank you after this we will be having refreshments and canapés at the Malfoy manor to celebrate his new position as headmaster .. all are welcome to join”. ‘Headmaster .. oh my how incredibly presumptuous” Y/N chuckled into her drink. “Excuse me” squeaked Astoria, she spun around rapidly locking eyes with Y/n. Y/n folded her arms across her chest and began “I do believe you heard me Astoria .. you said headmaster and thats yet to be revealed so for you to address Draco as said headmaster is well.. presumptuous”. Astorias tongue prodded the inside of her cheek, you could tell by the hue of red in her face she was infuriated but trying to find the words without imploding.

“Well , I just know he will ok so yeah just know that”, spat Astoria in a feeble attempt to shake off Y/ns rightful observation’. ‘Oh I see” snapped y/n “why didn't you say it was you sooner, Sybil , Sybil Trelawney teacher of divination . What are you doing here under the guise of Polyjuice potion? I mean you could’ve just come with your crystal ball and tea leaves and said he was the winner that way instead of this elaborate scheme don’t you think?” The laughter of fellow by standers suddenly erupted around the women. Astoria who now sup parsed hues of red was the shade of a beetroot , completely enraged prepared to snap she was interrupted by Dumbledore. “ NOW now girls quell your fiery natures, this is to be a peaceful night of celebrations”. The woman smiled coyly at Dumbledore. ‘My apologies Dumbledore” y/n chimed up. “We speak no more of it ok” Dumbledore smiled and gently patted the crown of y/ns head and proceeded to make his way back to his chair. Y/N turned and smiled gloatingly at Astoria. In response Astoria screwed her face up mockingly and fled no doubt to chastise Draco for not swooping in and defending her.

“Pwoarh Nice one mate” chuckled Fred as he held out his fist waiting for Y/n to bump it. Hahah stop it you she giggled. ‘Here , should we go to the manor after this for a laugh” sniggered George appearing alongside them. “Ha, I'm sure she’s revoked my invitation effective immediately” said Y/n, as she peered over to Astoria , she could see her flailing her arms around whilst Draco made no attempt to conceal his look of boredom in the conversation. “You know what lets .. Ive been dying to get a peek of the manor anyway what harm can it do”. ‘Cracking’ the twins harmonised in unison. The trio linked arms and jollied along.

Once arrived at the manor they soon found it to be every bit luxurious as they envisioned. The floors were marble and reflected the light of the enormous crystal chandeliers suspended from the ceiling. Each stair of the grand staircase was illuminated by candle light creating an auburn strip propelling up the length of the stairs. Every inch of the manor oozed with decadence. “Wow , its rather impressive” mused y/n . “You can say that again” chimed Fred as he helped himself to a glass of champagne , handing one over to y/n. They began to mingle and drink with the rest of the party guests it was an overall pleasant evening that was until Astoria appeared before Y/n. “Glad to see you could make it y/n” said Astoria with a constipated smile. She had made little to no effort to conceal her sarcastic tone.

Y/n had no interest in rehashing todays mini confrontation. Instead she pulled a sickly sweet smile and said “ Wouldn’t miss it for the world, thank you for your generous hospitality Ms Green grass.” Astorias face dropped “green green .. she muttered, haha don’t be silly you must get use to calling me Mrs Malfoy”. Now despite y/ns fondness to antagonise Astoria at any given opportunity she couldn’t help but see she was visibly hurt. She immediately began to fumble her words in a bid to preserve her feelings “honestly , Astoria I'm sorry I didn't know the extent of your relationship .. I apologise”. Astoria still hadn’t reacted she stood stationary bottom lip protruding sad and helpless like a lost puppy. Y/n gently squeezed Astorias forearm and began to say “ look you mustn't pay it any mind, Draco wouldn’t dare indulge in any small talk with me about family life .. so don’t stress it congratulations by the way”. Astoria looked up at her with eyes softened . Relief washed over Y/n as she could tell she was receptive to her. Y/n couldn’t help but wonder to herself why he hadn’t mentioned news as big as that , they had worked so closely over these months . To be fair on a good day if you hadn’t known Draco you wouldn’t even know he had a girlfriend let alone fiancé .. or wife ?

Astoria went to talk but just then none other than Draco emerged behind her . His hand came down onto her shoulder. sharply. “ thats enough now sweetheart , I think Daphne was looking for you actually”. There was a weird exchange of eye contact Astoria weakly smiled and left. It was now just y/n and Draco stood before one another. Draco broke the silence by clearing his throat “ Y/L/N, may I interest you in a nightcap in my office ,there are things Id appreciate to discuss before we venture into our new working relationship”. Although slightly bewildered she agreed as after all they were to work alongside one another and she’d rather it be somewhat harmonious than turbulent.

Y/n followed Draco across the length of the great hall and into a pair of grand double doors. The room was vast , books littered the walls as far as the eye could see and in the corner a fireplace roared. Draco stood behind his desk and motioned for y/n to take a seat opposite him. She smoothed the back of her dress and proceeded to make herself comfortable. Draco started pouring whiskey from the crystal decanter into a couple of whiskey tumblers. The burn of the fire whisky ignited as it glided down her throat. The combination of whiskey and champagne left Y/N beginning to feel somewhat merry, she hadn’t really noticed during the quiet sobering conversation with Astoria. ‘So what is it you have in mind Draco?”. His stormy grey eyes peered over at her from behind his glass. ‘Very well” he remarked and manoeuvred himself to Y/NS side of the desk .He perched himself on the edge legs akimbo and both his large veiny hands clasped around his whiskey glass. Y/n inhaled sharply as she averted her gaze from his legs splayed before her. Continuing he said “ As you're aware I have my plans about how Hogwarts should be run , I have a detailed strategy and I plan to implement it as soon as possible .. so what I'm really asking is are you with me or against me because I have no intention of being held back”.

Y/n blinked rapidly .. she was unable to process what he was saying , how could he be so smug thinking he had headmaster place secured already. “ Fuck sake Draco, ok first that wasn’t really posed as an option now was it ?, also enough with belief that its your divine right to just be appointed as headmaster! What makes you think that if you somehow are the headmaster I will just bend at your will? Pathetic!” She scoffed into her drink. Draco began to stifle a laugh “ Ah you do amuse me y/n”, look I'm willing to let you have some creative control … only if you prove to me how badly you so desire it”. His suggestive smile sent shivers up y/n. “Fuck you Malfoy” she hissed and jolted from her seat, once she reached the door she rattled the doorknob but to no avail the door wouldn’t budge. “Open it now” she demanded . Draco slowly sauntered towards her and leant across the door “hmm I thought you liked a challenge .. guess I was wrong this will be no fun after all ” Draco was indeed correct Y/n did enjoy a challenge and he’d be gravely mistaken if he thought she would let him get away without putting up a fight”.

Something switched in Y/n she turned to face Draco who was only inches away. He towered over her with his svelte frame encased in an all black suit. ‘Is this what you want Draco hmm” she said in a sultry tone whilst hooking her finger into his belt loop pulling him closer. You want me to beg ..or would you rather me on my knees .. better yet I could be a good girl and just bend over that desk right now and let you have your way if thats what you want” . Draco's breathing was now laboured within seconds he had pulled y/n in by the waist flipped her round having her pressed against the door, his body weight up against her and his hand holding her arms in place on the door. Y/n could feel the stiffness of his impressive length against her derrière. With a shallow gasp he breathed dangerously close to her ear “ be careful what you wish for ms Y/L/N , I don’t take too kindly to false promises as I always get what I want” . With that he tossed her around to face him .Y/n was now panting her body was burning in desire she wanted nothing more than to drop to her knees there and then. No wonder Astoria was attached to his hip.. if this was anything to go off.

Y/n bit her lip she felt dizzy with emotions . Draco stood before her with a devious smile , his hands soon intertwining at her waist and face buried in her décolleté littering it with kisses making his way down to her ample bosom. Y/n couldn’t help but throw her head back in delight eliciting a small moan. That only became fuel for Draco as he hoisted her leg from the floor and wrapped it around him. It was then Y/n felt a vibration from the opposite side of the door., as if someone had knocked from the outside . It was then followed by a mousy ‘ Dray , are you in there’. Draco paused for a moment grip still tight on y/n. “What is it I'm having a business meeting , i'll be out shortly don’t hover ”. It was clear who it was… the pair unraveled themselves from one another quickly smoothing out clothing and rejigging themselves. ‘Ok let us” let me stop you Draco, Y/n interrupted pressing her finger against his lips to audibly shush him. “ As if you think id let this happen you think you get to fuck me then you do as you please and I a dutiful little lap dog . Pfffft what a joke like it or not I'm going to be your boss so the only way I'm fucking you is in the more figurative sense , now you better hurry up don’t want to keep your fiancé waiting or Is it wife hmmm”. With a quick flick from her wand she sent the door swinging open and promptly stormed out.

The day had finally arrived the great hall of Hogwarts was alive with the buzz of chatter. The sizeable table at the forefront of the hall hosted all the teachers and most importantly both Draco and y/n. Dumbledore made his way to the podium, he produced his wand and placed it at the base of his neck it acted as a megaphone propelling his voice across the hall. “Everybody if I may have your attention please.” The chatter soon died down and everyone eagerly cast their eyes on him. “ Right, I shan’t keep you in suspense anymore , it is time to announce your new headmaster & deputy ’. Both Draco and y/n fidgeted in their seats after all these months of rivalry it had boiled down to this. “ Ladies and gentlemen, introducing Ms y/n y/l/n your new headmaster !” Boomed Dumbledore. .Y/N shrieked she was giddy with excitement she couldn’t believe she had actually done it. Everyone around her broke out into wild applause there were whistles and jeers laughter overall excitement. She was being ushered by the surrounding teachers to get up to the podium to make a speech. As she was making her way she cast eyes on Draco, there he stood paler than usual and unresponsive he was there physically but not mentally his carcass stood stationary unable to ingest the news he had just been fed.

The days rolled into weeks weeks rolled into months and y/n had almost completed a whole term at Hogwarts. All was going swimmingly and albeit begrudgingly Draco was in-fact a great support on her journey. It was the last night of term and y/n sat a her desk pondering over a mountain of papers. Y/n sighed and cradled her head in her hands , she was exhausted she spent all her time dedicated to the role that she forgot to take time out for herself. There was a knock at the door “Come in” she yelled out. Draco's head emerged around the door. ‘

Oh hey you , come in come in” ushering him to the desk. ‘Oh dear , sucks to be you , regretting the position of power now?” Draco chuckled menacingly. “Ha ha very funny” she uttered dryly. “Anyway , some of the other teachers are going out for drinks but I can see you are busy” said Draco eyeballing the mountains of paper. “Yeah.. I afraid I am , but you enjoy yourself Draco have a drink for me and i'll see you next term” she smiled warmly at him. Draco locked eyes on her , hands stuffed in his pocket he began to fidget. “In all honesty I'm not the fondest of all the people going .. also Id much rather not be at home ..before you laugh or probe why just don’t because I won’t go into it but I can’t bare to spend another moment longer with …her .. so umm yeah , I can help you out here then say you make it up to me buying me a drink later?”

Y/n smirked “You’re quite then enigma aren’t you Draco ..? He raised his eyebrows at her in acknowledgement. “Fine , id appreciate that very much but I am rather tired so if it's not beneath you I can offer you a drink at mine ..”. His eyes flickered up to meet hers , stifling a smile . “Id like that ..”he said softly , ‘well then , let's get to work” y/n smiled. Draco and y/n worked through the night it was filled with chatter and laughter they felt at ease with one another. Once they finished up the momentum continued on at y/ns house. Copious amounts of fire whiskey later they found themselves delving into deeper topics having more in-depth conversations and discovering more about one another. Draco's whole demeanour was very relaxed and this was foreign to y/n. His shirt sleeves were rolled up and tie loosened. ‘You know .. you're an alright person not that much of a pain in my arse surprisingly” Draco chuckled swigging another mouthful of whiskey. “Well thats rich” laughed y/n.

“Right well I've really enjoyed this but its getting late , I can barley keep my eyes open … earlier you mentioned you didn't want to go back so .. you're more than welcome to stay …. Only if you want”. Rattled by the kind gesture he smiled affectionately. Stumbling over his words “umm yeah , thank you y/n you’ve exceeded your generosity let me at least grab us coffee for the morning then. “Sounds like a plan , hopefully you won’t find me a pain in the arse again come morning ”. With a cackle Y/n got up from the couch and showed Draco to the spare room. Once at the door she began to wish him a goodnight. As he went to hug y/n his lips grazed her cheek. Y/n suddenly recoiled , a silence loomed over them as they gazed at one another the emotions of that night in Draco's office flooding back. Y/n could feel the heat surging in her cheeks so she hastily wished him a good night and scurried to her room. Once in the shelter of her room she let out a sigh of relief. She knew it was the right thing to do but my how she craved him.

Draco burst through the door making a beeline for Y/N. He took her into his arms and kissed her with an insatiable hunger. Backing her into the wall he began to rid her of her clothing . Y/n hands clambered at his chest to do same however he abruptly stopped her “ Oh no you don’t , you think I forgot about that little stint in my office huh ? Well I didn't and I've been awaiting the day I get to fuck you senseless Ms y/n … you control me all day and now its y turn to control you .. you will do everything I say do you understand” . Enthralled by his dominance Y/n nodded enthusiastically. “Sorry I didn't hear you “ roared Draco grabbing her face towards his. “Yes who”. “Yes Draco” she moaned . “You can do better than that dear yes who, i'll only ask you one more time or i'll have bent over my knee.. so what will it be?” . “Yes … daddy “ she muttered bashfully. “Thats my girl” he bellowed. He grabbed her and thrust her onto the bed , he unfastened his tie and instructed her to lift her hands above her head. Y/n did as commanded. He bound her wrists up and hooped them over the bed post. “Now, I'm going to have my way with you and you don’t get to touch me understood!” ‘Yes daddy y/n whimpered” “ahh what a good girl you are, ugh the things I'm going to do to you”. Y/ns eyes winded in desire, Draco shimmied y/ns shirt up and instructed her to bite down using it as a makeshift gag. He suddenly began to kiss her lower abdomen slowly sliding off her trousers.

Y/n titled her hips aiding him in taking them off. Draco's eyes lit up upon the discovery of her not wearing any undergarments “oh so you were anticipating me you filthy slut” Draco chuckled darkly’. He teased and taunted kissing her inner thighs only grazing her sex, this drove y/n crazy her body craved him inside her. Draco finally delicately licked a strip against her folds causing her body to crumble at the slightest of his touch. His warm moist tongue began frantically massaging her causing her to rive in ecstasy . His tongue began to vibrate excitedly against her clitoris sending shock waves through her entire body , she bucked her hips in excitement unable to keep her composure as Draco's tongue fixated on lapping up the one spot that drove her insane. Y/n was close he was relentless with his tongue against her swollen bud , just as she was about to finish Draco withdrew. Y/ns face fell in disgust just as she was about complain he plunged his fingers deep inside her ..pumping rhythmically y/ns juices coated his fingers . His other hand sloped around her neck , eventually this caused her to release all over his hand. Draco's pupils now engulfed his eyes …he was enthralled in pleasure watching her crumble for him . “ Aren’t you a good girl , snarled Draco “squirting for daddy , whilst I love it I don’t recall giving you permission to” .y/n squirmed overcome with pleasure unable to respond.

He unhooked her and brought her to her knees. He ripped her shirt from her mouth and produced his veiny throbbing cock dripping with pre cum. Y/n gasped in astonishment and eagerly attempted to take him all in her mouth bobbing her head enthusiastically until her jaw ached and eyes began to stream. He hurled his head back in pleasure as her tongue gently caressed his pulsating tip. “Ugh yeah just like that baby “ he muttered .

Without warning y/n sucked on the tip with vigour. Draco let out a ferocious moan whilst grabbing y/ns hair fashioning it into a ponytail attempting to make her glide her tongue down the rest of his shaft. He couldn’t have her do that for too long as he surely would finish in her mouth. “You filthy filthy girl “ he beamed as he pulled her off his cock . Rocking her head back spiting in her mouth. He brought yn to her feet and began kissing her deeply interlocking his tongue with hers , she yearned so badly to touch him to feel her skin against his. “ Get over here , I want you leant over this bed frame whilst I fuck you .. I'm going to cum on that pretty pussy then I'm going to put it back in understand!” Firmly instructed Draco . “Yes daddy” that’s my girl he cooed. Draco teasingly stroked his member against her entrance this sent shock waves through y/n causing her to gyrate in hopes he would slip in. Draco caught onto this and his hand came down harshly on her derrière .y/n let out a gasp. “Don’t be greedy now” he laughed tightening his makeshift restraints on her wrists. Relentless with his teasing it was a shock to y/n when Draco abruptly pushed into her. Y/n was in euphoria as was Draco as the warmth of her walls swaddled his manhood.

Draco slammed into y/n her body rattling with pleasure, just then Draco felt himself out to release .. so true to his word he instructed y/n to lay on her back so he could empty his contents onto her. He threw his head back in jubilation upon release. As he went to enter her again this time her was slower much more gentle taking y/n into his arms. “How do you want me to finish you off baby?,like this or I could use my fingers?” Y/n shuddered remembering the bliss she was in from his lengthy fingers so it would be a no brainer to opt for them “Fingers please daddy” she uttered softly.

He untangled himself from her stood up and offered his hand . Taking her across the room he sat down in-front of the floor length mirror instructing y/n to sit in between his legs. “If its fingers you was then its fingers you���ll get but your gonna have to watch me”. His large hand sloped up her neck tenderly chocking her whilst his other massaged at her slit . Y/n was still dripping from earlier so it was light work for him to imbed his fingers into her. Y/n couldn’t take it the combination of Draco's fierce unwavering gaze in the mirror and the sheer bliss she felt with her legs quaking she soon released decorating the mirror in-front her. “Ugh your amazing baby” he beamed kissing her forehead gracefully. “Here let's get you cleaned up and we can cuddle in bed”. “Oh my … I didn't peg you as a cuddling type Draco” y/n laughed gingerly attempting to get up her legs still trembling beneath her. “Shut up you” he scolded “when will you learn there’s a lot you still don’t know about me y/n”.

[thesolotomyhan]

a/n: javi’s is on the way btw haha ill just drop poison off first and come back! :)) just because i know many of my beloveds have been craving some poison content and here i am trying my best to fullfill that hole :) i hope you amores enjoy this filth either way! :))

warnings: nsfw! what else are we here for

choking kink

If there is one kink that blasted inside of my mind and invaded all of my thoughts right off the bat when thinking about poison and his kinks,, it would definitely be the fucking choking kink because wow? before we get right into it,, please someone confirm with me that ??? you’ve seen this mfs hands right???? im not the only one who has stared a little bit too longer than normal at his hands right?? RIGHT???  because good god,, not only are they just big but the way he tops it off with the bracelet and the rings ??? matame because he has no reason to make me weak with just his fucking hands,, and so after establishing this i just ,,, i want to direct you all to the first thing that has always popped up inside of my brain because can you imagine him having you underneath him, your legs spread wide on either side of his hips and your arms just laying right next to you helpless to even bring them to hold onto him while he thrusts into you,, his own hands would be at first holding your thighs open for him to keep them from closing and just grunting with each thrust he makes to go deeper inside of you and wow when he sees you throw your head back,, his name coming out of your mouth in stutters and all slurred,your body bouncing in time with his thrusts that it would have one of your hands coming down to latch onto his arm and wow-  it would just  have him bringing that arm up,, his hand wrapping around throat and just squeezing your neck just to see you become more desperate but also so he can bring your eyes back forward towards him,, the cool metal of his rings and the grazing of his bracelet brushing against your hot skin would have you whimpering out to him as he continues to bring pressure to your throat,, his thrusts unrelentless it would have your body curling up into his- i ok

teasing

I honestly want to say that this came to me when i saw him having that teasing ass smirk he had trying to talk that one girl up at the club right before disaster hit ya know,, because i could just imagine how this mf would love saying the dirtiest shit to you in your ear when youre out in public just so he can have this smug ass smile looking at you getting built up from just his words and mere touch,, i-  and not only that but i know he would love it too when you turn the tables on him and tease him back,, like getting him built up to the point where he would be getting hard,, his hands magnetizing towards your hips and not wanting to let go until your pushing right past him with a smile of your own and saying some shit like “pero aguanta un poco mas, si? mi veneno?” and oh my god the way this mf would groan but shoot you a smirk gives me so much life wow-  

you wearing his things

I have two thoughts on this but we’ll start off with one of them because you know his leather jackets? His iconic fucking jackets hes always wearing? Yeah ok imagine you wearing one of them and I think ive already talked about it in the dating him would include hc so i won’t really go into here,, i just wanted to throw that out again lol nah wait you know what no because im sorry this thought still haunts me to this day and im going over it slightly again today because the thought of you wearing his jacket over your outfit after he takes you out to the club :))) and having you :) laid against the hood of his car:) moaning his name out, your breasts spilling and peaking out over his jacket and having your skirt/dress bunched up around your hips while he rams his hips into you is just wow,,, him grunting out seeing you in his jacket, on top of his car,,  your writhing body exposed to him?? no im not ok so dont look at me IM SORRY but what we will talk about anyways is you wearing his chains because WOW right? because right now im just imagining the way he would stare up at you on top of him,, you having your hands on his shoulders to steady yourself as you move your hips down onto his,, wow you throwing your head back when you feel one of his arms wrap around your waist to bring your body closer and to get himself a better angle inside of you,, his other hand coming up to travel up your stomach to your chest just watching the way his cold chains would look like against your sweaty skin bouncing in time with your movements,, your whines of his name the only other thing hes focusing on besides the way you would look like a reina wearing his chains while riding him i- wow no ill just excuse myself 

bondage

Listen just-  please ill make it short and to the point just in case,, because if youve been around me since the first time i wrote about poison months ago- i lowkey wanted to include this into his nsfw headcanons but i didnt know if we vibed with it or not so im gambling my cards right now writing this filth because WOW it just does something to him when he sees your hands tied up for him,, keeping you in place for him while he just watches you struggle against them,, trying and failing to get further away from him from all the pleasure hes giving you,,, yeah no one talk to me thats all i’ll say about this ok- 

hair pulling

ok - so hair pulling, its a thing that i know a lot of our favs have and of course poison would have it too right? because i imagine it coming out when he has you in doggy style position,, where at first he would have both of his hands planted on your hips to help you bring you back into him to meet his thrusts,, you would start to become too weak to keep your head up so you’d be letting your head fall down onto the pillows,, your moans becoming muffled and him just having one of his hands beginning to wander up from your ass up the expanse of your back until he reaches your hair,, just tangling a handful of it into his hand and yanking your head back up from the pillows, your moans becoming more clearer and his whole body moving to drape over your body,, his hand thats in your hair moving your head to the side so he can whisper into your ear like “no estés callada, mi amor” his other hand moving to wrap around you to hold your hips up but holding you up by your inner leg so he can sneak his fingers to play with your clit ,, “quiero escucharte-” wow- your whines filling up the room again,, keeping his hand tangled into your hair to keep your head up while he continues pumping into you,, him just placing one of his fingers onto your clit to apply pressure and see the way your face scrunches up - i ok 

or,,,,, even when youre riding him….. :) he would love to pull your hair :)))so he can just bring his hand to travel up your back up to your hair and grab a fistful and pull your head back so he can expose your neck to him to suck on your skin there- ok you know what ill just leave that idea here before i get carried away

spanking

god- i have this exact kink waiting to be fucking written for someone else on these kink lists but i know,, i feel it in my bones poison would also love this shit especially, when he has you on top of him :))) inside :) the car:))) because imagine this with me alright? him having you ride him in the car maybe after taking you clubbing or just a quickie before he has to go somewhere but either way,, the windows are all fogged up,, his hands would be on your lower back helping guide your hips down onto his,, the both of you breathing heavily against the other and wow you moving your hands to hold him by the back of his neck and you starting to purposely squeeze around his cock just to try and see him falter in his thrusts and i cant- because the way he would groan out and toss his head back a little while his hands press even harder into you,,  giving you a look while you would be smirking down at him would have him bringing his hand down unexpectedly to swat at your ass,, kneading your flesh while he smirks up at you when he sees your smirk get wiped off your face,, your hold on the back of his neck tightening again and you moving to lean your body down onto his again when he raises his hand again to your burning skin - mmm IM SORRY OK

biting

Again i feel like this would come out when he has you in doggy style because im imagining when he brings your body up to his,, your back to his chest and the both of you in a kneeling position, one of his hands coming to hold your body up in front of you and just him leaning his face down onto your shoulder while your trying to catch your breath,, your body trying but failing to squirm away from him while he slowly drags his cock in and out of you,, him just lightly chuckling into you when he hears you whimper out like “que, ya no aguantas, mi amor?” woW him bringing his teeth down to bite into your shoulder just to hear you shudder against him- ok ill just,,, - 

WAit or even when hes going down on you,, him having his lower face glistening with your cum,, holding your legs open while he just watches your body shake,, him moving to sink his teeth down into your inner thigh like “siempre tan buena para mi verdad?” im GONE-

dirty talk

ha it’s something about him being a sicario that’s so fucking hard-faced or duro that just speaks poetry to me and mixing it in with dirty talk???  someone help me ok? Because i can always see it coming out whenever hes fucking you into the bed that it has you slurring all of your words together and your moans becoming incoherent,, your body just becoming weak that he would have to keep his arms around you to keep you up for him even if he has you on your back and wow- him just whispering some shit to you while one of his hands holds your face so you can look at him,, his other hand has him bringing his fingers to roll your weeping clit in between his fingers while hes still buried inside of you just dragging his hips against you slowly like “como te ecanta que te use asi verdad? como si fueras mi jugete” im not ok what is wrong with me - 

[junoscrybeofshadows]

(Continuation/my response to @scrybe-of-tarot 's recent response For searching shadow rp Post was getting long long again Lol --Misty)

"....Very well if that is what you wish please follow me." Juno..had some doubts that Hemera was okay. She wanted to implore her to continue to rest however, she did not wish to argue. And if they wanted to continue their walk she would not deny them that. Thus she merely nods her head and carries on moving through each section of the gardens scowering high and low for the Gardener she was looking for until finally they found them.

Practice archery in a small outside archery gallery/training ground was an old man, with a long beard littered with leaves, dressed in a rolled up white shirt, dirt covered dress pants and a bright spruce green vest standing no more than roughly 6 and a half feet tall. He doesn't seem to take notice of the trio his gaze to focus on the constant bulls eyes he was shooting until he heard Juno call out his name after his last shot at the targets across the small field.

"Alder! There you are," she says causing the man to turn to them. Just like Juno and Bernard his skin was made of shadows only his features were far more define as wrinkles and age lines curve when he suddely smiles at her. "Ive been looking all over the gardens for you. I should have known you would be here."

"Haha indeed," The gardener states with a chuckle, slinging his bow onto his shoulder and pulling forth a walking cane from a bag on his back to aid in him walking. "Trapper and trader had to reschedule our get together today, so I thought I would use the time to brush up my archery skills..And I see we have visitors. Greetings! I am Alder, and I am the Gardener of this fair Island. May I inquire as to who you two may be?"

[bepp-ers]

“Ok. So ive read fanfics and headcanons of yandere!Diavolo basically getting with MC to annoy or make Lucifer jealous. What if MC feels like Diavolo is doing this and try to say no whenever Dia tries to ask them out? Hes the the future king and rarely gets told no. I feel like he wouldnt accept MC's refusal.”

Yandere!Diavolo x MC. Thanks beautiful anon for requesting. And it ended up being gender neutral because it just did. Also ever so slight Barbatos x Reader too bc i errr simp-- Enjoy lovelies! <3

TW: Kidnapping, warnings of physical abuse, deceit, emotional manipulation, Diavolo being a bitch

“Are you afraid?”

You were seriously annoyed. Living in the Devildom, fun right? 

Apparently not with the Prince around. Diavolo was nice, you supposed but very much arrogant. 

So here you were, faced with yet another proposition. 

“Look, Diavolo you’re nice but once again it’s got to be a no. Please understand that, I mean no disrespect.” You were a bit nervous, the way his eyes narrowed and his smug smile widened.

“Of course. But one day maybe you will give me a chance.” You forced a smile and turned to leave, wanting to return back to the house of lamentation.

- 

“Oooh, MC you’re in a bad mood! What’s wrong?” As you walked into the kitchen to grab a drink, you heard Asmo quip at you.

“Nothing, nothing, I’m just tired...” You leant on the counter and sighed. “Come now, we both know it’s something more than that. You can tell me!”

“Fine, it’s Diavolo again.” “Eh? Again?” “Yep. He keeps asking me to be with him, and I’m almost certain it’s to make Lucifer jealous.” 

Asmo tapped his chin in thought. “Hm, well that is a problem. I can’t help you, although you’re super lucky to have the future King after you. Maybe Lucifer can help?”

You blinked. “Hey that’s not a bad idea. Thanks Asmo!”

You hopped down from the counter and left, to hopefully find some help on the situation.

-

Knock knock!

“Enter.” You quietly stepped into Lucifer’s study, where he was doing goodness knows what.

“Ah, MC. Need something?” You sank into one of the chairs and sighed. “I need you to talk to Diavolo for me.”

The scratching of the pen stopped at once and Lucifer fixed you with a look. “Pardon?”

“I meant what I said. I have utmost respect for Diavolo, but at the moment he seems... He won’t take my ‘no’ for an answer in being his partner. And he won’t listen to me, so I was hoping you could talk to him?”

Lucifer paused for a moment, taking in the information. 

“I see. So, you want me to discuss with Diavolo why you don’t wish to be his partner?” “Please.” “Very well. Next week’s student council meeting will--”

“I need you to do it as soon as you can.” Lucifer gave you a small smile. “MC, I appreciate the concern but I can assure you Diavolo means no harm. He is simply not used to being refused something.”

You stood up, and shook your head. “You don’t understand... Nevermind, it doesn’t matter.” 

With that, you left.

After closing the door in annoyance, you groaned, heading back to your room. It was unfair! No one saw the urgency of the situation!

‘Who else can I talk to...? Lucifer will only talk to him next week, and I don’t think any of the brothers would want to talk to him...’

An idea popped into your head, and you grabbed your D.D.D.

Scrolling through your contacts you clicked on a fairly unused one. 

Riiing... Riiing.... Click!

“MC. What a pleasant call.” 

“Hey, Barbatos. Listen, I need to talk to you about something, but I’d prefer to do it in person.” “That is completely fine. Would you like to come over tomorrow?”

You sighed in some relief. “Yeah, yeah that’s brilliant. Thanks.” “It’s no problem. I’ll escort you, if you’d like.” “Mm, thanks Barbatos. See you tomorrow.”

You hung up and grinned. Why hadn’t you thought of that before? Barbatos could help for sure... right?

-

In the morning, at breakfast you informed the brothers of where you’d be going.

“So what are you doing today, MC? You could come with me to Devil’s Kitchen-” “Or you could come buy a matching outfit with me for Devilgram!” “Yeah, or they could stay in and play the new game with me? Only if they wanted, of course-!”

You chuckled at the brothers bickering. “Actually I’m going out today, so I can’t join any of you.”

“Oh? And where are you going?” “To spend some time with Barbatos actually.” “Huh?! Why are you hanging out with that butler?” “Mammon, jealousy isn’t a good look for you.”

“I just thought I would, because I don’t spend much time with him. He’s picking me up soon.” “Oh! Is MC going on a date?” “I very much doubt that, Asmo.”

You gave Asmo a side glare and stood up from the table. “I just want to talk to him, that’s all. I’ve gotta get ready, catch you later.”

-

“Alright, see you guys later! If I’m not back by this evening assume I’m dead. See you!” You stepped out of the building with Barbatos and he gave you that oh-so-polite smile of his.

“MC, you look nice. So what is you wished to discuss?” With one graceful flick of his hand, Barbatos had both of you transported to the Demon Lord’s castle.

It wasn’t the first place you’d wanted to go to, but if the time was spent with Barbatos on his own then it would be fine.

“Well, actually it’s about Diavolo- No, before you say I don’t want to talk to him about this. Believe me, I’ve tried.” You leant back into 

Barbatos pursed his lips and glanced to the side. “I believe I know what this is about. Excuse my manners, I haven’t offered you anything. Some tea?” 

“Oh, thanks.” He nodded courteously and stood up, leaving for a moment.

You glanced around, taking in the grand carvings in the gold ceilings, and how everything from the paintings to the threads of the cushion you were leaning on had some air of royalty to them.

“Here you are MC. I hope it is to your liking?” “Mm.” “Wonderful. Now, about your concerns. This is about My Lord’s... advances, isn’t it?”

You nodded, and sipped your cup of hot tea.

“No need to say anything, I completely understand. My Lord is a wonderful demon, he’s just new to this kind of thing. But I understand why you are uncomfortable, and I will talk to him about it, if you’d like?”

“You will?” “Of course, I’d be more than happy to oblige. MC, are you feeling well? You look a little pale.” He suddenly commented, and you noticed a strange feeling in your temple.

“Ah- now that you mention it, I feel kind of... tired... Wait- Barbatos what’s in this tea...?” You trailed off, your delicate cup clattering to the ground.

“I’m so sorry, MC. Out of all the futures I’ve seen, yours was one of the brightest until you came here... I truly am sorry.” Remorse welled in his teal eyes and you slipped forwards, sleep overtaking you.

Gloved hands caught you swiftly, but you didn’t know what happened after that. You could only imagine Barbatos carrying you to the grand room, removing your D.D.D from your possession and glacing wistfully back at you as he locked the door.

-

“Ahh, you’re finally awake! It’s so lovely to see your bright eyes again.” ‘That voice, it can’t be...’

Your worst fears had come true. Here you were, just woken up in the lap of the demon Prince himself. ‘Angels save me...’

“What... Diavolo..?” “Yours truly. How do you feel, darling? Terribly sorry about getting you here, Barbatos was rather reluctant about the whole plan but seeing the future is such a nifty trick, eh?”

You scrambled out of his loose grip and hunched up to the head board, golden like everything else in this fucking castle.

“You- he- He tricked me! Let me go, you can’t keep me here!” “I think you’ll find I can, being the future King and all. Come now, what’s with that expression?”

You glared at him, eyes fixated on sending a look of pure hatred. “You’re a monster. I told you I didn’t want you. You can’t just kidnap someone if they don’t requite your feelings!”

“Can’t I? You don’t seem to be correct, this time.” “You bastard!” You cried, and jumped off the bed, sprinting towards the door. 

Of course it was locked, but that wouldn’t stop you from banging on it and screaming. “Barbatos, Barbatos please help me!”

“I’m afraid that won’t help you, MC. Barbatos is my servant after all, and a servant cannot disobey his master. As for you...”

You heard him stride across the room, and you turned to face him- only to wish you hadn’t.

“Are you afraid, MC?”

Diavolo’s usually wide smile had been replaced by a sinister grin, and he had changed into his demon form- a truly terrifying sight to behold.

“Not going to answer me? That’s okay, I don’t need you to.” You pressed yourself against the door, ready for some kind of agony, but it never came.

Instead, he picked you up and sat back on the bed, nestling you on his lap once more.

“I must say, it’s better when you don’t fight back.” You couldn’t move. You were genuinely paralysed. 

All you could do was whatever he wanted, evidently. 

“What... did you do to me...?!” “What an accusation, MC. I simply made the situation more enjoyable, wouldn’t you say?”

“The brothers will find me... The angels will find me too... You won’t get away with this..!” You hissed as he pressed gentle kisses to your neck, content.

“I wouldn’t be so sure about that. After all, they’ll be too sad to find that you left them, without even saying goodbye.”

“W-what?! I would never.... You cruel bastard!” Your eyes welled with tears, and he carefully wiped them away with his thumb.

“It’s okay, it’s okay. You have me, right darling?” “I don’t want you!” “We’ll have to work on that, but that’s okay... but that’s okay, if it’s for you!”

“Don’t... don’t touch me.” He sighed, pulling you closer to his chest and ran his hand through your hair.

“I suppose if you keep denying me, there will be consequences, but I’m sure you’ll be a good little human and keep quiet, right?”

--

haha this was long. and i may or may not be working on yandere! simeon and solomon right now so uhhhh shhh. i’m not a huge fan of Diavolo but the dynamic is fun. see you soon lovelies <3 

-Bepp

[kpopluvrsblog]

I got you princess

Requested: may i please request for a jealous bsf mark where he sees y/n getting wasted in the club (because she saw mark getting close with the popular girl) and she's with yeonjun so he drags her out and they fight but end up confessing to each other.. i hope that isn't confusing haha thanks !

Genre: angst + fluff, smut!

Pairing: mark x fem!reader

Warnings: SMUT! Dom!mark x sub!fem!reader, unprotected sex ( uak the drill ), reader goes somewhat into subspace at the end, creampie , kind of rough sex, slight masturbation suggestive dancing, swearing, use of the word slut

A/n: this is so long,,, SORRY I ADDED SMUT i cant help myself when it comes to mark... if anyone doesn’t want to read that part it is at the end!!

You slam your locker shut, sighing loudly as “those two” pass by murmuring amongst themselves. By “those two” you mean mark and little miss popular. It’s not that you were popular but of course everyone loves miss perfect aka Jen and they can’t see through her facade. “Me and mark used to be like that..” you whispered to yourself.

“HEY Y/N” someome suddenly screamed in your ear. “YEONJUN!! oh my,,, you scared me!” You whined and smacked his arm lightly, making him chuckle to himself. “ Mmm sooo how’s your little crush on mark going? He seems to be all over jen today...” yeonjun asked with a face of concern.

“ oh a little?” Your eyebrows shot up with sarcasm. “Honestly, its... ever since they’ve gotten closer, she’s got him wrapped around her finger. Its as if me and mark had never been friends.” You look off to the side and scoffed at how whiny you sounded.

“No no no y/n... thats it!! I am not letting you sulk over this loser. He doesn’t understand anything.” He rolled his eyes before continuing “ we need to go out!!” He said happily. “ go where exactly?” You questioned as you grabbed his hand and started to walk to the exit of the school. “ go clubbing!!” Yeonjun said excitedly.

‘Clubbing huh... that doesn’t sound too bad!’ You thought in your head. “ alright clubbing it is!!”

That leads to where you are now. Looking at yourself in the mirror, wearing a burgundy fitting dress which made all of your curves stand out and matched it with burgundy heels as well. You have done light makeup with a black winged liner and added diamond jewelry pieces.

“DAMN y/n... baby you look GREAT!! wow you look so good i-“ yeonjun cut himself off when he reached up to his mouth and wiped off his drool, his actions making you laugh. “Stop!! Lets just go!” You said while laughing. You noticed his attire matches yours. He was wearing a burgundy suit as well which complimented him so well. “You look really good too though...” you smiled brightly at him as he grabbed your hand, thanking you with a blush on his face and brought you to his car.

The drive to the club was around 30 minutes. Yeonjun had found a club or as he called it “ the best club you’ll ever go to” and insisted that you both go there for the night. He said he wouldn’t drink so he could be your DD ( designated driver).

——————————————————————————

Your mouth dropped open when he pulled into the private parking lot for the club. “Yeonjun this is..” you trailed off in awe. “Amazing. I know.” He finished the sentence for you. “alright, in we go!!” He jumped excitedly.

As you walked to the large glass double doors. The bright lights and blaring music became clearer. You could see the many people that were occupied inside. Yeonjun said something to the security man standing outside, which u didn’t understand since you were too busy admiring the place, but before you knew it he was leading you inside.

“ALRIGHT, drinks first baby we gotta get you to loosen up before we get started.” He shouted over the music and the yells of the other people as he brought you to the bar. When he talked to the barista you started to scan the crowd of unfamiliar faces, smiling at the sight of everyone having fun. Suddenly you furrowed your eyebrows... ‘was that mark?? What was he doing here... wait, jen is... dancing on him.. woah, okay.’ Your thoughts ended as yeonjun poked your side and handed the shot glass to you “ thanks” you smiled at him and chugged the drink, feeling the hot liquid slide down your throat, leaving a slight burn.

“Agh” you winced at the flavor causing yeonjun to chuckle. “Its good huh?” He smirked. You turned back to the barista, “excuse me!! Can you give me the strongest shot you got?!” You questioned with a smirk. “Challenge accepted” the barista laughed and went to mix you up a drink. If mark can have fun why can’t you?? It’s time to get over him.. he’s obviously taken. “Is that mark here??! What the fuck man!!” Yeonjun shouted with a look of pure disgust when he saw who was attached to him.

“Y/n lets go! We’re going to go dance and show him what he’s missing!!” He looked back over to you just in time to see you take the mystery shot. “Damn that shits strong” you croaked and laughed when you saw yeonjun smiling at you.

He pulled your hand through the crowd of bodies and brought you to an open spot. Already feeling the alcohol take its place you started to dance with yeonjun wrapping your hands around his neck as he placed his hands on your hips. You smiled up at him and turned around in his grip, bending fowards slightly, now grinding your ass up against his bulge with his hands still groping your hips as he grinds into you.

You stood back up, still moving your hips and reached your arms over your shoulders to hold onto the back of his neck lightly. You looked up and met a gaze of who you completely forgot about. Jen was no where to be seen and mark was leaning against the wall with his arms crossed, biting his lip harshly and glaring at the man groping you. Yeonjun leaned down slightly to press a light kiss to your neck and thats when mark broke.

One second you were dancing with jun and the next someone was leading you to a secluded place of this club. “WHAT the fuck are you doing mark!!! Let me go!!” You shouted as he pulled you into one of the empty backrooms. “Shut up.” Is all he said while he went to block you from leaving the room. “Shut up?!! What do you mean shut up!! Ive been shutting up since you decided to ignore me for the schools slut!!” You shouted at him trying to push him out of your way.

“HEY!! She is not a slut first of all-“ you cut him off with a slap to his face making him stare at you in shock. “Not a slut?? Mark where do you think she ran off to huh?! You think you were the only guy shes been talking too?! What a dumbass... im leaving now.” You declared waiting for him to move out of your way.

“Y/n... listen-” Mark started. “No!! I don’t want some pity apology to leave your mouth! I want to leave and never see you again.” You stated with your arms crossed until mark suddenly pulled you into his chest, arms wrapped tightly around you, as if he let go it would cause you to disappear. “ what the- Let me go!!” You mumbled into his suit.

You heard him sniffle and now realized that he was crying... a lot. Even though he is a dumbass you can’t help your feelings for him. “Listen y/n... im so so sorry that i pushed you away. I just- oh my gosh. I love you y/n... so very much that I unintentionally pushed you away and when i noticed how close you were to yeonjun, i thought that i could never treat you like how he does, i could never make you happy and i KNEW THAT. When jen started to pay attention to me, i thought i could take my mind off of you and that you would have a better life without me in it. I know how she is y/n... but my jealousy got the better of me. The reason why she left just now is because I wasn’t paying attention to her. How could i when you were standing so beautifully in front of me... and thats when i noticed that i couldn’t get over you, especially with yeonjun touching all over you when that could’ve been me if i tried and i- hmmph“

He was talking too much... his words making tears rolls down your face, soaking up into his suit. You leaned up to press your lips tightly against his. His body stiffened when your lips touched his... they were so soft. He quickly loosened up and hugged you tighter, his lips now moving with yours as you continued to make out. After a few minutes you pulled apart, a string connected between you both, chests heaving. You knew you looked like a mess but mark still looked down at you with so much love.

“First of all your still a dumbass...” you whispered, causing mark to giggle. “ I’ve never stopped loving you, me and yeonjun are just friends and he knows about my crush on you. But when you started ignoring me.. wow it hurt so bad and it pains me to admit that. I was so jealous that I couldn’t be with you-“ mark cut you off with another peck. “Mark let me finish!!” You blushed trying to pry him off of you.

“No i already know where this is going... im sorry for being a fucking idiot but i really do love you and i hope you can forgive me.” He said while letting a few more tears out.

“Okay no more crying!! Of course i forgive you and I obviously still love you too... you’re lucky you only ignored me for around a month though...” you trailed off into a fit of giggles. “Lets leave this place y/n, ill tell yeonjun whats going on and ill take you to my place to get you cleaned up okay??” Mark said while caressing your hair lovingly. “Mhm lets go!”

——————————————————————————

《smut starts》

After some time, you and mark had finally arrived at his house. “Ahhh okay here we are.” He sighed when he pulled into his driveway. “ okay lets get you cleaned up hmm?” He questioned when you both entered his house. Too tired to answer you hummed an answer back hoping he would understand, of course he did. Having already been here many times before, you remember where everything is which made it easier to navigate through his home. “Lets take off these shoes first, i bet your feet hurt so bad right now.” He pouted and sat you down on his couch, leaning down to take off each heel and lightly massaging your sore feet. “ it’s alright you can close your eyes baby ill take care of you.” Mark then leaned up to peck your lips one last time to hear you mumble “ thanks baby i lovveee you hmm” you then closed your eyes and felt him pick you up, bridal style and bring you into his bathroom. He took off your jewelry and placed them safely in the cabinet. He then proceeded to remove any excess of makeup that you had left on your face.

He was debating whether or not he should bathe you, as you probably feel gross. Since you had not fallen asleep yet, you decided that you wanted to be clean. “Baby you can bathe me its okay. I trust you.” You said softly, making mark smile at your cuteness. “Alright, im going to undress you now, lift your arms up for me.” You did as you were told, he took the snug dress off of your body, leaving you in your matching lace bra and panties... he couldnt help but get turned on. He thought your body was outstanding. Mark shook his head lightly trying to get out of his thoughts, you, now with your eyes open, noticed his actions and smirked. “Whatcha looking at?” You questioned innocently while looking down at your body.

“I uh- uhm oh yeah ill start the bath” he blushed and moved to the tub, now filling it up with hot water. The alcohol had mostly wore off now, since you hadn’t drank a lot. You started to unclip your bra and pull off your panties. “Mark can you help me in the tub please” you asked. You both knew you were capable of getting in yourself but nonetheless he grabbed your hips and set you softly into the tub.

“Dont you want to get clean too?” You asked and pulled lightly on the bottom of his tie. He smirked at your request and pecked your cheek. “Let me go get clothes for us to change into and ill be right back.” When he walked out you couldn’t help but notice his hard on. God he was so hot.

You knew you had some time. Whats the harm in just touching yourself a little? You fingers slowly trailed down to your clit and you slowly rubbed circles on the sensitive nub, letting your head fall back and small moans pour out from your mouth. “Having fun without me?” Mark asked with his clothes off and standing in the doorway, his hard dick on display. Where did this Confidence come from? He came up to the tub and lifted you out now patting you dry and emptying the tub.

“Do you really want this?” He looked you in the eyes as he asked this. “Yes i really want this please” you answered and bit your lip. “We’ll bathe after this then okay?” He didnt give you time to answer as he picked you up and brought you out of the bathroom straight into his room. He placed you gently on top of his bed sheets, luckily there was a thick blanket on top that he had layed out, so now the sheets won’t be dirty.

You pulled him on top of you and trapped him between your legs as you made out with him, lightly sucking and pulling on his lips, with your hand running through his soft disheveled hair. He groaned into your mouth as the tip of his dick brushed against your slick entrance. “Just put it in im wet enough and i really need you i cant wait please please please- OH” you moaned aloud as he followed your requests. His thick dick now stretching out your tiny pussy. 

“Fuck baby your so tight for me, damn you feel so good. Does it feel good for you baby?” He whimpered into the crook of your neck as he pushed your thighs apart farther, his hips now pressed tightly against yours. “It- um.. mmh” you already couldn’t form a sentence...

He chuckled and put his hand under your head, now holding you even closer. “Fuck.. m- mm move please” you whimpered. You were so sensitive and felt so full with him pressing against your cervix. He slowly pulled out and pushed back in, which made you gasp and clench even more, making it hard for him to move. “Loosen up for me hm? Let me fuck you properly. Show you how its done baby” you followed his orders and let him keep hitting that spongy spot deep inside of you. “A- ah keep going” you let out gasps and moans as he was now pounding into you. Mark was breathing heavily as he sucked marks onto your pretty delicate skin.

He snaked a hand down to rub on the nub you were playing with earlier. “Feel good?” He questioned and got a moan in response. He knew you were close by how you started to clench uncontrollably. “Im gonna cum shit im going to-“ you stopped your rant when he went even harder than before, you could feel him in your stomach. “I know baby. Cum. Cum all over me and make a mess. I got you.”

“FU-“ your orgasm was so hard that you went silent as your eyes rolled back, nails leaving streaks on his back. “Fuck y/n im cumming” he came inside of you with long hot ropes shooting into the deepest parts of your body, filling you up to the brim with warmth. You both came down together... only mark came down actually. “You’re okay princess. You did so good. Come back down to me, im waiting” mark whispered to you as he pulled out of you slowly, watching a white mess come gushing out of you. “Mmhm i did good?” You asked with a whimper while holding onto your stomach, feeling full. “Yes princess, so so good for me. Im going to bathe you and change you now okay? You can sleep, i know you’re tired.” After hearing his words you fell into a deep sleep knowing that he would take care of you.

——————————————————————————

You woke up with the feeling of being wrapped in warmth. You groaned as you turned around in marks hold, now facing his angelic sleeping face...’ he looks so at peace’ you thought. You also noticed that he dressed you in an oversized sweatshirt of his and gave you a pair of his boxers to wear. He really did clean and take care of you last night huh...his grip tightened around you and you left a soft kiss to his lips as you fell back into your slumber with a smile, knowing that you were definitely going to spend your life with this man.

[hangovercurse]

The Things We Can’t Tell Pete About vi

You and Colson grapple with being “just friends.”

Colson X Reader

Warnings: Cursing

Word Count: 1871

| i | ii | iii | iv | v |

masterlist

Hi friend

You were in the studio working on editing one of your songs when you got the text. You hated it, but you smiled automatically when his name popped onto your screen.

Hi friend

The past few days had been weird, but necessary. Colson ended up staying at Pete’s apartment the next night too, so you had plenty of time to figure out how “friends” worked. Unsurprisingly, you hated it. But it was the only way to keep Colson close to you, so you’d take it.

I’m bored

I thought you were friend?

Haha

But seriously you should entertain me

As friends

I’m in the studio rn

U can take a break

What would we do if I took a break?

You tried really hard not to flirt, but it came so naturally. But maybe if you convinced yourselves that you were just friends, it would happen. Because that’s how things work.

Lunch?

I’m hungry

I thought you were bored?

That joke is lame

:)

Will u pls go out to lunch with me

As friends

Hmmmmm

I suppose I could think about it

You sighed, saving the audio project and shutting the computer down. You hadn’t eaten all day and spending time with Colson wasn’t the worst way to spend your lunch break.

Y/N I will find you and drag you out of that studio

You don’t even know where I am

Where do you wanna go?

I could find out…

Whatever u want

Mediterranean? There’s a cute place right by me I’ve been wanting to check out.

You sent him the address, asking him to meet you in 10 minutes.

It’s a date

Wait

No

Not a date

Like I’ll see you then

You laughed as the texts came through your phone, shaking your head. You headed out of the building, walking towards the small restaurant. You weren’t exactly dressed in “lunch clothes,” because you had expected to stay in the studio all day, but you would survive.

You got in line at the blue painted restaurant, thankful that it wasn’t too long. You waited a few minutes before a familiar voice spoke from your side. “Now what’s a pretty girl like you doing all by herself?”

You smiled, turning to Colson. “Waiting for her friend to show up.”

He raised his eyebrows, a smirk on his face. “I hope your friend is as hot as you are.” He chuckled.

You rolled your eyes, “not even close.”

Luckily Colson understood you were joking and he laughed with you. “How have you been?” He asked, “did they catch the guy breaking into apartments?”

“I’ve been good, working.” You nodded, “yeah, they caught him. He broke into this police officer’s place while he was home.”

Colson huffed in amusement, “talk about bad luck.”

“Right? I mean, I’m glad they caught him but, I mean, what are the odds?” You moved forward in the line, reaching the hostess stand.

“Two please.” Colson asked, flashing the girl a smile. You bit your tongue to hide the scowl that almost instinctively came to your face.

The hostess was young and no doubt attractive. She batted her eyelashes towards the tall man, not even acknowledging you. “What’s the name?”

You furrowed your eyebrows as Colson answered, wondering why she would need his name if she was taking you to the table. “And what’s the number?” She asked sweetly. If you were drinking water you would have spit it out.

Colson blushed slightly as you stood in shock. “Um-I’m.” He looked at you as if to say “I’m here with someone” but then he must’ve realized that he wasn’t technically on a date. “You’re lovely, but I’m not interested.” He muttered out, an awkward look on his face.

You were trying your hardest not to look pissed off, because if you looked pissed off then the lie you and Colson have been telling each other about being just friends would be exposed.

The girl looked you over, eyes raking up and down you with a disgusted look on her face. You felt very self-conscious suddenly, your head turning towards the floor in embarrassment. Colson noticed and cleared his throat, “our table?”

The girl didn’t speak a word as she grabbed two menus and led you to the table. “Your waiter will be with you shortly.” She spit out, anger on her face. Your heart was beating very fast, but you couldn’t tell if it was from anger or sadness.

Colson eyed you from across the table as you played with the hair tie on your wrist. “You okay?”

“Yeah, I’m fine.” You spoke too fast to convince him, your quiet demeanor also giving you away.

He sighed, his foot kicking yours lightly and pulling your focus up to him. “Okay, you just seem a little uncomfortable.”

You huffed, “yeah, well, having girls look at me like I’m the scum of the earth does that to a person.”

He frowned, “You know she has, like, nothing on you, right?”

A small blush found your cheeks, and you looked down at your hands again. “You can’t say stuff like that.” You muttered.

“What? Friends say that stuff to each other! I’m trying to make you feel better.” His smile told you he knew what he had done, but he didn’t care.

You sighed, “yeah but you can’t say that to me.”

Colson gaped dramatically, “why not?”

“Because it’s different coming from you.” You laughed. “Why didn’t you give her your number?” You asked, curious for his answer.

He shrugged, “wasn’t interested. Guess I have high expectations.”

You rolled your eyes, “it’s not because I’m here, right?”

Colson let out a sigh, “N-“

He started to speak but was interrupted by the waiter at your table, “Welcome to Shuka, my name is Oliver, I’ll be your server today. Can I get you guys started with something to drink?”

“I’ll get a water, please.” You said, smiling at the man. Colson raised an eyebrow at you. “I have to go back to work after this.”

He chuckled, scanning the menu, “can I get a Nitro?” Oliver nodded, sending you both smiles before heading back to the kitchen.

You sent Colson a look, expecting him to continue your previous conversation. Instead, he continued to read through the menu. “Do you know what you want? I’m thinking about the Shak-Shakshu-.” He tried to pronounce the name of the dish but was failing.

You giggled, finding the dish on the menu, “Shakshuka.” You told him, “and I haven’t even looked.” You scanned through the menu in your hands, reading the names of the various dishes. Colson took to studying you, a small smile on his face.

“It’s not because you’re here. It’s because I’m genuinely not interested in anyone else.” He said out of the blue. Confusion flashed across your face before you understood what he was referring to. You took in a breath, trying to figure out how to respond. “I know I shouldn’t tell you that, but I just think you needed to know.”

You smiled to yourself, “I don’t mind, I just- it makes it harder to convince myself this isn’t a date.”

Colson nodded, “this is not a date. We are just two friends having a friendly lunch. As friends.” He was trying to convince himself too.

“Right. Friendly friends. Two people who are just friends.” You said, exaggerating the word “friends”. Awkwardness hung in the air for a few moments before you both started laughing.

You fell into the familiar pattern of conversation that seemed to come naturally to you both. When your meals arrived, you were both very excited. “Can I try some of yours?” You asked, sending him the most convincing puppy dog eyes you could muster. He chuckled, placing some of the poached egg onto his fork and moving it towards you. You rolled your eyes at the cliché but smiled anyways, letting him feed you. Your eyes widened in shock “that’s so good!”

He nodded, swallowing his food. “My turn.” He said, reaching over and plucking up a falafel from your plate with his fork. Once he finished eating he smiled at you, “you have excellent taste. You’re picking the restaurants every time now.”

You raised an eyebrow, a sly smile on your face. “So we’re going to have more of these friend lunches?” You asked.

“Duh. We’re friends. This is what friends do.”

You giggled, “I don’t hear about you and Pete going out for lunch together.”

The man chuckled, eyes closing for a moment. “If it’ll make you feel better I’ll take Pete to lunch one of these days.” That made you giggle even harder, shaking your head.

 Neither of you finished your meals, packing them into to-go boxes to eat later. When Oliver brought the check over, you were very flustered. Colson automatically reached to pay but you grabbed his wrist, “we’re on separate checks.” You told the server. Oliver nodded, moving to fix it until Colson spoke up.

“I got it, it’s not a problem.” You sent him a look. “I asked you to lunch, I pay.”

“Friends let their friends pay for themselves.” You muttered, moving your hand from his wrist.

He rolled his eyes, “you can pay next time.” Smiling smugly, he handed his credit card to Oliver, who was very confused. “Relax. I’m just being nice.”

You sighed, pouting slightly. “It’s already hard enough and then you make it worse by flirting and paying and- ugh.” You cut yourself off, frustrated.

Colson clenched his jaw, letting out a hard breath through his nose. “I know, I’m sorry. This isn’t exactly easy for me either.” You nodded, feeling slightly embarrassed at your small outburst. “We can do this.” He said, confidently. If only you could feel as confident as he sounded.

Once Oliver came back with the card and receipts, you both left the restaurant. You hadn’t noticed the cameras as you walked down the street with Colson, the conversation returning to light banter and jokes, but they noticed you.

Colson walked you all the way back to the studio you were working at, insisting on going with you all the way inside. “I just wanna see where you work.” He claimed, but you insisted it was just like every other studio.

You got into the elevator to ride up to the fourth floor, where your space was. Colson stepped in with you, a smile on his face. You sighed, pressing the button and waiting for the elevator to close.

“Hey Y/N?” He spoke as the doors began to shut. You looked up to him, eyebrow raised in question. The doors closed and instead of responding, Colson leaned down, pressing his lips to yours.

You kissed him back, hands cupping his face. You heard the elevator beep as you passed the second floor, and then the third floor. He pulled away, smile on his face.

You took in a deep breath, “I thought you…”

“Fuck it.” He muttered, standing up straight. You smiled, biting your lip. “But we’re not hiding this from Pete. We’re just… testing the waters.”

You hummed in agreement as the elevator doors opened, stepping into the hallway and leading him to your studio.

[everyhowlmarksthedead]

Don't nah to me.

NESTOR OCETEVA. ┃ MAYANS MC.

❝ request by @yourwonkywriter: Hi, Aurora, beautiful piece of art, my friend, my love, marry me and god bless your parents. Could I please request number 6 of the Random prompts list with Nestor (if that one isn’t taken, yet? Thank you💖✨

❝ request by @the-radical-venus: Hey!! I love the new prompts it was so hard to decide on one I'm so excited! Idk how I'm going to be able to wait until January, Ive been waiting everyday for each of your November prompts to come out so I've kinda sold you my soul at this point haha “Wanna like— I mean, if you're not busy… We could get lunch, maybe? Or even just a coffee, if you don't have a lot of time?” For nestor oceteva? Preferably him saying that line?

❝ prompts: “Nah”. “Don’t ‘nah’ to me”. / “Wanna like— I mean, if you’re not busy… We could get lunch, maybe? Or even just a coffee, if you don’t have a lot of time?”

❝ words: about 800.

Gif credits to my lovely @sonsofeorl.

Stretching your arms over your head and uttering a soft pleased grunt when you feel your back gnashing, you continue your path to the kitchen. It's almost lunchtime, but you came last night too late from San Diego and you need a coffee urgently. It has been the first time in two months that you've been able to sleep for more than six hours, after finishing the period of exams at college. And it feels so good to sleep in your bed. Almost colliding with your big brother, as he steps out from the kitchen, he leaves a rushed kiss on your forehead before disappearing through the living room straight to his office. It's good to be back at home.

“Buenos días”. You yawn covering your mouth with a hand, once Nestor turns around.

“Buenos días”. He replies, noticing the fleeting shine in his dark eyes.

Puckering your lips squinting towards him, you grab a mug from the cupboard about to giggle somewhat ashamed. There's something in his smile that could kill you in a sight, making you feel a little nervous.

“Good sleep?”

“Yeah”. Nodding your chin, you pour some coffee to your delight, not waiting to take a sip from your cup.

You can't help but keep your eyes on his at all times, intrigued, figuring out what's going on inside his mind. Licking your top lip, you shake your head expecting some more words from him. Maybe, something about his thoughts right now. But Nestor is just staring at you, silent, like a freak.

“It's creepy what you're doing”. You whisper wrinkling your nose.

The head of security chuckles, resting his waist against the counter as he keeps his hands inside the pockets of his dark pants, slightly showing a pair of colored suspenders over the black shirt perfectly ironing. Nestor rubs the back of his head for a moment, before hiding his hand again. You know what it means. You know him ever since and, even if sometimes he's very quiet, you've learned to read his gestures throughout the years. He's nervous. His fingers are shaking. His palms are sweating. All from a second ago, when you've walked in.

“Wanna like— I mean, if you’re not busy… We could get lunch, maybe? Or even just a coffee, if you don’t have a lot of time?”

For you, it's so cute the way he has to clean his throat pretending everything is going normal, that you feel your cheeks and the tip of your ears burning. Kissing your teeth, you look at the way Miguel has taken a minute before, considering if it'd be correct to date his best friend, the only man he trusts in. Nestor has liked you ever since, but you aren't sure if you should hear your heart or the last brain cell alive in your head.

“Like a date?” You raise an eyebrow interested in his reply, and because of that, you can see how he gulps a little jumpy.

“A da— date? Nah… Nah, nah, nah”. He's lying.

Standing up and taking the last sip from his mug, he leaves it inside the sink about to abort the mission and run away. The expression on him lets you know he has fucked up at the moment you haven't said yes, simply.

“Don't nah to me, Nestor”. You laugh inevitable at the grimace of horror, not finding any escape route when your brother appears again accompanied by Álvarez.

“You okay? Looks like you've seen a ghost, brother”. The older makes fun of him, watching how he loosens the neck of his shirt by undoing a button.

“Yeah, everything go— good”.

“What's your plan for today?” Your brother questions whilst grabbing a small bottle of water from the fridge, sounding very interested.

“I'm goin' on a date with Nestor”.

Oh, the pettiness. Silence filling the kitchen. Your brother lands his eyes on his best friend; confused, perplexed. Miguel must be thinking it's one of your jokes or something like that until he notices the sweat on Nestor's forehead. Marcus laughs breaks the tension installed around you, shaking his head as if it was the funniest thing he has heard in his life. The counselor has to abandon the place, almost choking on his own saliva, flooding the house with his laughter.

Miguel just sips water, moving his head from you to Nestor, like when he watches a tennis game.

“Qué desagradable”. He babbles, imagining stuff he doesn't have to imagine. “New nightmares unblocked… I don't want to know… a thing about it”.

Waving his free hand, your brother disappears again not adding another word to his sentence. Nestor is close to a heart attack, trying to say something in his defense. But he has collapsed.

“I'm free for lunch”.

“Uh?” He utters placing his attention back on you.

“Lunch. I'm free”. You repeat, conscious he hasn't heard you.

“Ok— okay. I, uh… I'll wait for you to… get ready”.

If you’ve liked it, lemme know in a comment, I’d really appreciate it. Reblogs are welcome too, so more people can enjoy it! ✨

GENERAL TAG LIST: @mayans-sauce @peoniarose @destynelseclipsa @band-psycho @myakai13 @petlaufeyson @-im-fantastic- @horsesandwolvesaremyanimals @rocketqueen @rosieposie0624 @ellyseveronica @Jessprins13 @diaryofkali @ravenmoore14 @starrynite7114 @kenbechillin @miahelen @monkeyluver4546 @sheeshgivemeabreak @jadesamhart @rawrlittlepanda-95 @megapeacelovemusic-blog

MAYANS MC: @multiyfandomgirl40 @countryash345 @skyofficialxx @lovebennycolonmiguelgalindo @bellisperennis0 @chibsytelford @trulysuccubus @purrrrfect @witching-hour @leathercladmenfics @encounterthepast @behindmyeyes-insidemyhead @queenbeered @sesamepancakes @gemini0410 @pinguinstudiert @oscars-wifeyyy @meteora-fc @lozaa94 @arveeee @joupym @hanster1998 @missswritings @arana-alpha @lucillewinchester @theocatkov @telfordlowmans @tclaerh @aurelie-celine @spideysimpossiblegirl

[tobesolonely]

muse

A/n: hello everyone!! im very excited to put this out :-) i was going to make a long one shot but ive never written anything multi-part before and i wanted to give it a go!! also my first time with an oc 🌟so i hope everyone enjoys!! not sure when the next part will come out but i wanna upload at least once a week or every two weeks or something idk haha but anywayssss lmk ur thoughts!

biggest, biggest thank u to my love @harryysstyless​ for beta reading and being so encouraging<333 luv u!!

photographer oc x harry styles

please let me know your thoughts on miss aminah, iman, serena, and harry!

my ko-fi! thank you :)

Los Angeles was your newest muse.

You had always been the spontaneous type. It came as no shock to your family and friends when you told them you had purchased a one-way ticket and were moving across the country. Although your parents weren’t too keen on the idea of their daughter moving so far away from them, they helped you withdraw your savings and find a modest apartment in LA before sending you on your way.

Your reason for moving to LA was simple, really. You were a freelance photographer that felt your career was growing rather… stagnant. You had a thick portfolio and were proud of the work you produced, but your clientele wasn’t as impressive as you’d hope it would be after nearly six years of working at it.

And so began your desire to move from New York to Los Angeles— one big city to the next.

People who knew you often described you as ambitious, fiery, and an absolute go-getter. If your big move scared you in any way, no one knew any better. Your confidence never faltered— not even in the slightest.

After nearly three months of being in LA, you developed a routine of sorts. You’d wake up, eat a breakfast that almost always consisted of avocado toast and coffee, and go on a run. After your run, you would come home, shower, and decide how far you wanted to venture to take pictures that day.

Sometimes your roommates, Serena and Iman, would join you to keep you company. Although you’d never met either one of them before answering their ad for a roommate on Craigslist, you had grown extremely close to the girls in the few months that you’d known them. Despite the two girls being friends since their childhood, they never made you feel left out, and you fit in with them effortlessly.

During your short time in the city, there were so many places you had been, but still, even more you had yet to see. Serena and Iman, both native Angelenos, would often suggest spots for you to check out and even offer to drive you around— you were from New York after all, and at twenty-four years old, you were still not the owner of a driver's license.

“You’ve never been to North Hollywood yet, right Aminah?” Iman questioned as you all lounged around, trying to come up with a place you had not yet been.

“No, I haven’t really gone anywhere farther than walking distance,” you reply, looking around the cramped living room for your camera bag. “Or the places you guys have driven me. That was still considered Downtown though, right? Where we went the other day?” You were still getting used to how absolutely massive Los Angeles was.

“We should go to Santa Monica or something— wait, Malibu!” Serena exclaims. “We have to go to Malibu, Mina. It’s so nice there, you could totally get a bunch of good shots.”

“Yeah, we might even see a celebrity!” Iman chimes in, stifling laughter.

It was an on-going joke between the three of you. When you first moved to LA, you told your roommates that you couldn’t wait to make your way around the city because you were hoping to run into a celebrity. It was Los Angeles after all— you figured they were everywhere.

You quickly learned that wasn’t the case. Celebrities here kept a low-profile and even if you did encounter a celebrity, it’s not like you would approach them. “You’re not funny, Iman,” you tell your roommate with a roll of your eyes.

“Yes I am,” Iman quips, wiggling her eyebrows. “If we’re gonna go to Malibu then I gotta change. Can I borrow a cute shirt from anyone?”

A short twenty minutes later, the three of you were piled in Serena’s car on your way to Malibu. You’d heard of the city before and knew it was a wealthy area, but that’s about it. Your roommates promised you that out of all the beaches in LA, Malibu had the nicest ones, and lots of places to take pictures. Since none of you had anything to do, you all decided it was as good a day as any to have a beach day and get some shots of your roommates to add to your portfolio. Since you didn’t know anyone except Serena and Iman, the pictures on your camera from the last few months consisted entirely of nature and inanimate objects. While it was good practice, you really preferred to photograph actual people.

“Traffic is so bad today,” you say from the backseat after traveling approximately two feet in five minutes. Iman snorts from the passenger side.

“When isn’t traffic bad, Mina,” she turns to look at you, an amused look on her face. “Don’t worry about it. It always gets backed up at this fuckin’ exit and then as soon as we get past it there’s like, zero traffic.”

“Right! I always complain about how shitty this exit is. I have no clue who designed it,” Serena adds, skipping through songs on her playlist. “It’s still early in the day, though. I’m just hoping the beach won’t be too crowded by the time we get there.”

“I don’t care how crowded the beach is. I just don’t want it to take us forty minutes to find parking…”

You tune out your roommate's voices, instead choosing to focus on the traffic jam outside the car. To Serena and Iman, people who were born and raised in Los Angeles, the city wasn’t necessarily anything special. Sure, they loved how there was always something to do, but the bad drivers, traffic, and smog got old. The novelty of LA hadn’t yet worn off to you, though. You didn’t know how your roommates were content to sit inside the apartment all day when there were tons of things to do basically right outside your doorstep. You felt like you were the one convincing them to go out with you half of the time, and you didn’t even know where you were going.

After what feels like almost entirely too long but was really only half an hour, Serena pulls into a fairly empty parking lot. “Are we not allowed to be here?”

“Why do you think that?” Iman asks, squinting her eyes to read a sign. “It doesn’t say it’s closed. I mean, there are a few cars–– look.” She points to a few cars scattered around the parking lot.

“I mean, it is nine in the morning on a Wednesday. People are probably at work,” you tell the two girls in the front seat. “Besides, there’s someone in the parking booth. Can you even close a beach?”

Serena drives forward, rolling down her window. “I mean, I guess not. You can close the parking lot, though.” You hum in agreement. She quickly pays for parking and tosses her receipt on the dashboard before driving slowly through the parking lot.

“I love when no one’s at the beach,” Iman sighs, clapping her hands. “No one will get in the way of your picture-taking either, Meens.”

You smile at the nickname. “Yeah, that’s true. We picked a perfect time to come too, guys. The lighting’s great.”

“Really? Is it gonna make my skin pop?” Iman turns around and sticks her arm out, sensually running her fingers along it.

“You always look good no matter what the lighting’s like, Iman,” you reply, refraining from rolling your eyes at her. “You have the glowiest complexion out of all of us.”

“We’re literally all the same skin-tone, Aminah,” she retorts, crossing her arms.

“We have different undertones, though,” you answer. “So not really. Plus, Serena is way lighter than us! What are you talking about?”

“Should I park here?” Serena asks, interrupting your conversation.

“Why here? All these empty spots and you wanna park directly next to this car?”

“This is a good spot, Iman. It’s a parking lot. If they didn’t want anyone to park next to them, they should’ve taken an Uber and got dropped off.” She turns into the spot, quickly putting the car in park and crossing her arms to prove her point.

You unbuckle your seatbelt, smiling at your friends’ bickering. They were so close they were basically sisters. They argued sometimes and were quick to call the other out on their shit, and you loved it.

“I just think you’re weird for parking next to this car. It’s a nice car.”

“Who cares, girl?” Serena groans, exasperated. “We’re gonna be on the beach. They’ll probably be gone before we will.” She pops the trunk before unplugging her phone from the aux cord and stepping outside. Iman mimics her before flinging the door open as well and stepping out of the car.

You make sure your camera bag is closed all the way before situating it over your shoulder and climbing out of the car as well.

“It’s kinda cold,” Iman says, wrapping her arms around her body. “If I knew it would be so overcast I would’ve bought a jacket.” Serena hums in agreement and you look up at the sky, unphased.

“It’s like, seventy degrees?” you look at the weather app on your phone in confirmation.

“We get it, Meens. You’re from New York,” Serena teases, closing her trunk. She hands you a few towels and a blanket to carry while she rolls the cooler and Iman carries the beach chairs and umbrella.

“It’s a cold seventy degrees and you know it,” Iman defends. “Look at my goosebumps. I can’t fake this shit.” You shake your head at your overly dramatic friends and follow them down to the beach. You take off your sandals as soon as you’re off the pavement, wiggling your toes in the cold sand.

“We can set up pretty much wherever we want,” Serena points out, tucking flyaway curls behind her ears. “Where do you think the best place to be is, Mina? Y’know, so you can get good pictures?”

“It doesn’t really matter, to be honest,” you tell them distractedly, too busy looking around the beach in awe. Your friends were right–– out of all the beaches you’d visited in Los Angeles so far, this one was the nicest (and cleanest). “Maybe we can get a little closer to the water?”

The three of you walk for a couple of minutes before Iman abruptly stops, dramatically dropping everything she was carrying. “Let’s just set up here. There’s no one around anyway, it doesn’t matter.”

“There actually is someone around,” you tell them, looking at a stranger who seemed to be fixated on staring at you and your friends. “Don’t look, but a cute guy is staring at us.” Serena and Iman immediately turn around, shading their eyes from the bit of sun that was starting to peek through the clouds. The guy couldn’t have been more than twenty yards away from where you were setting up.

...“Huh,” Serena says, turning back around. “Is it just me, or does that guy look a lot like Harry Styles?” She looks back over her shoulder again, but he’s no longer staring at the three of you, focusing on what appeared to be a book instead.

“Why would Harry Styles be at the beach by himself at nine in the morning?” Iman asks, unfolding a beach chair and flopping down on it.

“Why wouldn’t he? It’s Malibu, dude,” Serena responds. You could tell your friends were about to start bickering again, so you quickly jump in.

“Doesn’t matter. Neither one of you would go up to him even if it was, so what’s the point in arguing about it?” They both raise their eyebrows at you.

“And you would, Mina? Bullshit!” Iman exclaims, laughing. “I dare you to go see if it’s him, and if it is, ask him if he wants to join us.”

“That’s weird! What if it’s not him?”

“Even if it’s not him, we’ll still get to hang out with a cute boy.” Iman points out. Serena nods in agreement and you can’t deny that she makes a convincing argument. “Just ask him if he wants a mimosa or something!”

“No, don’t ask that,” Serena interjects. “Tell him that you’re a photographer and you’re working on building a new portfolio. Ask him if he would be cool with you photographing him.”

You narrow your eyes at her. “Are you sure that’s not weird, Serena?”

“Aminah, trust me. I wouldn’t deliberately let you make yourself look weird.” Your roommate reassures you.

And so you found yourself clearing the short distance to where the handsome stranger was laid, half hoping it was Harry Styles, half hoping it was not. You couldn’t act like you weren’t a fan of him–– you thought he was incredibly attractive and enjoyed his music just like most people. If Harry Styles was the first celebrity you encountered during your short time in Los Angeles, you‘d never stop talking about it. Ever.

When you’re almost to him he looks up, dog-earring the page he’s on. After making eye contact with him, there’s no mistaking that this is Harry Styles. You pinch the back of your hand, urging yourself not to freak out. He has a knowing look on his face and you’re grateful for your darker complexion that hides your blush.

“Hi,” you speak first, stopping a few feet away from him. “Uh, my friends and I are just uh, we’re... you know.” You internally wince at your inability to form a coherent sentence. His gaze never breaks from yours and you look away first, growing shyer by the second. If you thought he was beautiful on Instagram, he was even more gorgeous in person. It was incredible.

“Hi,” he finally says after a brief moment of silence. “‘M sorry if I was starin’ at you ladies a moment ago. I jus’ usually never see anyone else this early out here. Are you a photographer?”

You almost ask him how he knows when you realize your camera is still hanging around your neck. “Oh, yeah. Yeah, I am.” He’s still staring intently at you.

“Would you like to sit?”

You look over your shoulder at Serena and Iman who were pretending to be preoccupied putting on sunscreen, but you know they were waiting for you to come back with the man you now knew to be Harry Styles.

“Oh, my friends are waiting for me,” Harry looks up at you patiently, waiting for you to continue speaking. “I was actually going to photograph them. I’m working on building up my portfolio. I understand if you can’t for… I dunno, legal reasons? Or if you just don’t want to–– and that’s fine if you don’t, but would it be okay if I photographed you as well?”

“That actually sounds like a lot of fun. It’s kinda boring jus’ readin’ out here on my own,” he agrees quickly, surprising you. Harry stands up and stretches a bit before leaning down to gather up his blanket, towel, water bottle, and book. “What’s your name? I’m Harry.”

You know that Harry knows that you know exactly who he is, but the fact that he introduced himself to you makes him even more endearing. “It’s nice to meet you. I’m Aminah.”

Harry extends his free hand to you. “It’s very nice to meet you, Aminah.” You love the way your name sounds coming out of his mouth.

As you approach Serena and Iman, their eyes go wide when they realize it really was him. Serena nudges Iman and you know without even having heard it that she’s saying, “I told you so!” Harry stops a bit behind you, smiling at them.

“Hello,” he starts. “S’okay if I join you ladies? Aminah here extended such a nice offer that I jus’ couldn’t pass it up, but wanna check with the two of you first.”

Serena’s mouth is shamelessly hanging open, and you realize that she may have been a bigger fan than she let on. Iman answers for them. “Of course! Mina’s building her portfolio and I bet it would look like, super cool, if you were a part of it!” Harry nods, setting the few things he had with him down.

“I don’t think I would even be the center of attention if ‘m sittin’ beside you beautiful ladies. I’ll jus’ act as a prop or something,” he flashes them a dimpled smile. “If you don’t mind me asking, what are your names? I’m Harry.”

“We know,” Iman answers a little too quickly. “I’m Iman and this is Serena.” Serena gives him a timid wave.

“Well, it’s very nice to meet you all. Are you guys from around here?” He lays his blanket beside all of your stuff and sits down cross-legged, not once breaking eye contact with any of you. You had no idea how he did it.

“We live Downtown. We’re only over here so Mina could get some good pictures, she’s a photographer,” Iman answers proudly. “She’s amazing, but she’ll never admit it.”

“Iman…,” you trail off. “Stop, dude.”

“It’s true,” Serena jumps into the conversation, now seemingly over the initial shock of who was sitting barely two feet away from her. “She’s the best photographer I know.” Harry turns to look at you, an amused look on his face.

“That’s a hefty claim. I can’t wait to see your photography skills, Aminah.”

“They’re just hyping me up,” you reply, making a mental note to yell at your friends for embarrassing you once the three of you were alone again. “I’m not that good.”

“That looks pretty professional to me,” Harry says, gesturing to the camera that has not yet left your neck since arriving at the beach. “I bet you’re just as good as they say you are.” You look away, hiding your face. Iman, being the wing woman she is, can tell you’re growing flustered from all the attention and moves the conversation away from you.

“Do any of y’all want a mimosa?” Before anyone can even answer her, she’s popping open the champagne and handing the orange juice to Serena to open. Harry politely declines, as he drove himself to the beach that morning. You and Iman are ultimately the only ones who indulge in a drink since you were the only ones not driving.

Talking to Harry was like catching up with an old friend. He wanted to know everything about the three of you and whenever he felt the conversation was becoming too much about him, he quickly changed the subject. Harry learned that Iman and Serena have been friends since the second grade when Iman pushed some boy off of the monkey bars for teasing Serena. He learned your favorite take-out spots, your favorite bars, and what freeways Iman and Serena tried to avoid at all cost (it was the 405, which he agreed with). What seemed to intrigue Harry the most, though, was him learning that you just moved from New York and had never even been to Los Angeles before moving.

“Why did you pick somewhere all the way across the country that you’d never even vacationed at before?” He had a look of confusion written across his face. You shrug, not really knowing the answer.

“I mean, I’ve seen it on TV shows and in movies. That doesn’t count?” you joke. Harry still looks utterly bewildered.

“I mean… no?”

Serena laughs. “We were just as confused as you were, Harry. We were scared for a moment when she moved in because we were like, oh shit, what if she’s insane? You know? Like, what sane person would move all the way across the country to live somewhere they’d never even vacationed before?”

You let out an offended, “heyyyy”, lightly smacking Serena’s thigh. “I just needed a change and I’m a drastic person! I either go all-in when I do something, or I just don’t do it at all.” You defend yourself.

“I actually think that’s really fuckin’ cool,” Harry says after a moment. “Sometimes I wish I could just… up an’ go. Y’know?” you all nod, and it falls silent again. “Well, should we take some pictures now?”

Any intimidation you felt to photograph Harry disappeared as soon as he started posing for you.

Being that he was a major celebrity, he was no stranger to posing for a photoshoot. Harry was ethereal–– you knew the pictures of him would most likely require minimal to no editing. Serena and Iman also looked incredible, and you were thankful to have such gorgeous people as your muses. You were taking pictures of them in various places around the beach, only stopping once it started getting too crowded. There were starting to be too many people in the background of your shots and Harry wanted to get going, not particularly in the mood to be recognized. The three of you decide you should get going too. You had more than enough pictures to go through and besides, you were all starting to grow hungry.

Harry follows the three of you to the parking lot, keeping his head down the entire way. The closer you got to Serena’s car, the sadder you got. You didn’t want to stop talking to Harry and photographing him. However, you knew you were just in the right place at the right time, and it was likely that you’d never cross paths with him any time soon–– if ever again.

“Thank you for letting me photograph you,” you tell him sincerely once you were almost to Serena’s car. “That was really kind of you. I can promise you I won’t post them anywhere without your permission or like, disclose the location or anything like that.”

Harry finally looks up, determining you were far enough away from the crowds and he was no longer at risk of getting recognized. “It was my pleasure, really. Thank you for inviting me to hang out with you and your friends. It was a lot of fun getting to know you all.” You feel your body heat up.

“Where did you park?”

“Right there,” Harry points straight ahead. “You?”

You let out a loud laugh, causing Serena and Iman, who was walking slightly ahead of you and Harry, to turn around and look at the two of you. “We parked right next to you! Iman was getting on Serena for parking next to you because the lot was pretty much empty when we got here this morning.”

Harry lets out a breathy chuckle. “I guess it’s fate that we crossed paths then, yeah?” You let out a quiet hum in agreement, stopping a few feet in front of Serena’s car. You hear her and Iman debating on where you should stop for lunch, but you were waiting to see what Harry would say next.

“Aminah? After you get a chance to look at those pictures, do you think you can send them to my manager? His name’s Jeff. I’d love to see how they come out.”

“Oh yeah, of course! Do you have his business card or something?” You were excited that Harry actually cared to see your work but based on the couple of hours you spent interacting with him, you learned he was just an overall insanely kind person.

“I can jus’ put his contact info in your phone? If you don’t mind,” his gaze falters, a sheepish look on his face.

“Totally! Let me just unlock my phone,” you dig in the pocket of your shorts, pulling your phone out and unlocking it with your face. You hand it over to him and while he’s looking down typing you glance over at your roommates who had shocked looks on their faces. You would explain to them later that he wasn’t giving you his number, just his managers, but for now, you’d let them think he was giving his number to you out of all people–– a total stranger.

Harry hands it back to you a few moments later, running his fingers through his hair. “Thank you again for such a great morning, Aminah. I’ll let you get goin’, don’t wanna hold you ladies up any longer,” he waves at Serena and Iman. “It was really nice to meet all of you. Hope to see you all again soon.” You notice that his gaze lingers on you for a moment when he says that, and you feel your body heat up for what must have been at least the tenth time that day.

The three of you watch as Harry unlocks his car and throws his items haphazardly into the passenger side before climbing in, slamming the door shut. His car starts immediately afterwards and he gives you a quick nod before quickly backing out of the spot, leaving. None of you say anything for a bit, just processing what just happened. Serena is the first one to speak, her hand on the handle of her car door.

“Are you fucking kidding me? Harry fucking Styles?” her voice raises at least two octaves and you know she’s about to have a mini freakout. “Did he ask for your number, Meens?”

“No dude, he just gave me his manager's number. He wants to see how the pictures come out after I edit them,” you tell her, opening the backseat of her car. “It’s not a big deal.”

“Uh, that’s definitely a big deal, Aminah. Stop being so humble,” Iman tells you, exaggerated annoyance lacing her voice. “Did you see how he looked at you? When he said, ‘Hope to see you all again soon’?” She puts on a terrible posh accent.

“You’re so annoying,” you groan, shaking out the blanket and beach towels before throwing them onto the seat. “Where are we gonna eat?”

Iman and Serena pile into the car as well, telling you about the three restaurants they were stuck choosing between. You hum distractedly, typing the name ‘Jeff’ into your contacts to see if Harry left a number and an email, or just an email. Your brows furrowed in confusion when you see the name is nowhere to be found in your contact list. You chalk up the mistake to Harry just forgetting to press ‘save’ after creating the contact and figure you can just find his manager’s contact information on the internet somewhere. As you’re scrolling back up through your contact list, your eye lands on a name that makes your breath hitch in your throat.

Harry Styles.

[yesttoheaven]

AMOR FATI

pairing – neil x female!reader

wc – 3.8k

warnings – mention of death, self-blame, anxious/intrusive thoughts, questioning reality, refusal of help, guns, stalking, but I swear there's a light at the end of the tunnel haha

a/n – The last time I suffered so hard for the death of a character, was when Newt died (Maze Runner) and now Neil has captured all my attention and his death has hit me in the same way 😩 I needed a happy ending so I decided to write this!

The Eternal Return and Amor Fati mentioned in this fic are one of the main ideas of Nietzsche's philosophy.

English is not my first language. I am getting help from google translator and he is not always a good ally, so I apologize for any typos or grammar errors.

Y/N – your name

She approached the painting hanging on the wall, watching the details closely. Ouroboros. A serpent eating its own tail. Months ago, when Y/N was visiting an antique store in Mumbai, she saw that same symbol. The owner of the establishment approached when she realized her interest in the piece and explained that Ouroboros represents the ideas of movement, continuity and, in consequence, Eternal Return. A concept that the universe and all existence and energy has been recurring, and will continue to recur, in a self-similar form an infinite number of times across infinite time or space.

"Max finally fell asleep." Kat returned to the living room, attracting Y/N's attention.

She walked away from the painting, taking back her seat on the sofa and asked:

"How is he after everything that happened?"

For a moment, Kat looked at the painting on the wall and then at the friend she won in the midst of confusion over the Algorithm. At that time, despite being fighting on the front lines to prevent a possible Third World War, Y/N seems complete. Happy. Today that happiness no longer exists in her eyes.

Letting out a sigh, the woman sat next to her, answering:

"Sator was never a present father. He was always busy... now i can see the kind of work he was involved in. Anyway, Max just got used to his absence."

"It's notable that he's happier at your side. When we first met Max was a bit of an introvert, but today he is radiant." Y/N confessed, showing a small smile and the blonde shook her head, agreeing with her words. "How's everything?"

"Perfectly well. It's weird sometimes... After years of being stuck in a failed relationship, freedom is good."

"It seems like life is good for one of us." The woman let out a bitter laugh, putting the latest events on a scale, but she didn’t want her friend to think she wasn’t happy for her. She really was. "I'm sorry, I just..." The words remain stuck in her throat, while she covers her face with her hands. In addition to physical and mental fatigue, Y/N tried to hide her grief.

Kat touched her shoulder, showing that she was here.

"I know you're hurt, but it's been three months and you never talked about what happened that day... This is not good for you."

"What do I have to say, Kat? The guy I fell in love with was a fucking time traveler! And now he's dead and I don't know what to do. My life just... stopped without him."

"I can imagine how difficult it's for you to cross that line without Neil at your side, but giving up is not an option. Grief is consuming you little by little and you are just accepting it..."

"We are trained to contain our emotions and deal with death in the best possible way. It used to be easy for me, but then he came and turned my life upside down." Y/N put her hands on her knees and stood up, walking without an exact destination. "Neil was always one step ahead of us all..." She stepped forward too and found the painting again, but her mind was lost in thoughts about him. Neil knew her so well. And he had a charming smile, but completely arrogant at the same time. "I was sent to Mumbai to help two agents and when I arrived at Priya's penthouse that night, there he was. When he saw me, that was the first and only time that he let his guard down. I'll never forget how he looked at me, it was one of those breathtaking moments... Completely cliché, I know."

On the sofa, Kat was impressed. When Y/N turned towards her, there was a bright smile on her face. The simple memory brought her a breath of happiness and Kat enjoyed seeing her friend like that, but unfortunately that moment did not last long. Memories aren't enough. Neil is dead and nothing can change that.

"I miss him so much, Kat." The smile disappeared as soon as tears appeared in her eyes, cascading down her cheeks.

"My dear..." Worried about her, the woman got up quickly and approached Y/N, wrapping her in a tight hug. "I'm really sorry."

"I spent the last three months locked up in my a-apartment because I thought I could handle this situation on my own. At times I b-believed it was just a fever dream... Maybe I was losing my mind, but this is proof that everything was real." Through tears blurring her vision, she looked at the watch on her wrist, remembering that night.

Y/N was in a private cabin on the ship. The others were with Ives and Wheeler, going over the mission in search of any loose ends. A standard procedure. Y/N knew she should be with them, but she needed a moment alone to organize her thoughts. And that moment is now. The past few weeks had been a real mess. The inversion was difficult to explain and mainly to understand. She was used to field missions, but being an inverted soldier on the battlefield was not in her plans. Either way, she agreed to be a part of it and running away with biased assumptions was not going to help. Humanity depends on them.

Three knocking on the door caught Y/N's attention, but she remained silent, waiting for the person to give up and leave, but when it didn't, she just murmured 'Come in'.

"So, here you are." The man used a surprised tone of voice and closed the door behind him. "What will our superior think when he learns that you are running away from the briefing?"

She let out a laugh before answering in the same mood:

"Don't worry, I know this mission like the back of my hand. I just needed a moment."

"There's something wrong? Are you ok?" Neil spilled the questions quickly, visibly concerned for her.

"Yeah, I'm fine, Neil." Y/N smiled at him, but looked away just seconds later, confessing: "Maybe I'm a little surprised by the situation. I have spent years dealing with terrorists, but the inversion is really not my point."

"I'm not good with advice, but someone once said to me: Don't try to understand. Certain things in the world do not need an explanation."

"It's wise advice, but I'm a methodical person. Logic has always been my ally in missions."

"A methodical person, huh?" He asked with an arrogant smile playing on his lips and she just rolled her eyes. "I know how worried you were when Sator shot Kat, but we are using the inversion to save the world and you're one of the most brilliant agents I have ever seen. Everything will be fine."

"Are you praising me?"

"What's that? Can't I praise my partner's talent?" Neil pulled up a chair to sit across from her, crossing his arms.

"In that case, thank you. Remind me to put this on my resume." Those words made him laugh and that sound could easily be compared to music in her ears.

Touching her knee, Neil added:

"We are very confident with the mission. You don't need to worry."

"Are you sure?"

"I cannot say that unforeseen events do not happen, but we are prepared for that." Y/N knew he was right, but this mission is the biggest one so far. It's not about saving a country. It's about saving the entire world. This was arousing insecurities in her and it was like walking in a minefield. Ironically, she was familiar with this, but not in such catastrophic proportions. "I want you to have this." The man took his watch off his wrist and handed it to her.

"What’s that supposed to mean?" The question came out as a whisper from between her lips.

It didn't make sense. Why does everything in this conversation look like a farewell?

"We will be on opposite sides tomorrow, but i want you to know... I will always be with you, Y/N."

"I saw the way he looked at you... That's how I used to look at Sator before he became a monster in my life." Kat started, running a hand through Y/N's hair. "When I was lying on that stretcher and partially drugged with the medicines, I saw him beside you... watching you sleep. There was so much love in his eyes. Love for a lifetime, Y/N. So don't do this to yourself. The way he left hurt us all, but there was nothing you or any other agent could do to change what happened at Stalask-12. Neil saved the world. This gave us a second chance. You cannot give up now. This organization needs you. And keeping your mind busy at that moment is the first step towards a fresh start."

"N-No, I can't..." She broke the hug, shaking her head in denial. "I left the organization."

"What? Don't you work for Tenet anymore? But when we first met you told me that you can't imagine working in another area... And that this is your life's work."

"Being an agent is my life's work. I was in Yemen when Tenet found me and assigned me to this mission. My only job is to make this world a less hostile place, but the motto of this organization is not what I believe, Kat. What's happened's happened. Really? It doesn't work for me." Y/N ended the sentence with drops of anger in her voice and Kat did not say a single word.

Through the newspapers, Max's mother followed what was happening in Yemen over the years – a real endless war – and knowing that Y/N was in the middle of it, makes the situation unquestionable. People died in front of her eyes. Friends of the corporation. And then some time later, Tenet arrived with a fresh start, but in the end everything remained the same. She lost Neil. It is as if her life's work never had a happy ending because the world will never stop being a hostile place.

"He knows?" It was easy for Y/N to identify who she was talking about. The Protagonist. Or just TP.

"Here's another problem. I worked with him and indirectly worked for him at the same time! God, that man created this organization! And his name remains a mystery to us all!" She pinched the tip of her nose, feeling frustrated with all the secrets that haunt this organization. "And answering your question, yes, he knows, but he did not argue about it. I was a complete mess and he was not doing very well either... He stayed in my apartment for the first month, probably to make sure I didn't do anything stupid." And Y/N would be forever grateful for that. She likes him. Just as friends, of course. TP was a reserved man, but it was he who held her when everything was falling apart. "But we've had a fight. I blamed him for what happened at Stalask-12 and since then we haven't spoken anymore."

It was easy to see that they carried more pain than they could actually bear. Y/N lost her great love and the man lost his best friend. The situation just turned into a conflict between them and that was the result.

Realizing the sadness reflected in Y/N's eyes, Kat decided to change the subject of the conversation. Keeping that thought, she smiled and pointed to the painting on the wall. Maybe that could help.

"You seemed interested in this one."

"Oh yes, in my spare time I am a lover of art and its meanings. It is really attractive the way Ouroboros is connected to the Eternal Return..."

"And Amor Fati too." Kat completed, piquing Y/N's curiosity. This part was new to her. "It's impossible to affirm the Eternal Return without loving life. We need to learn that things happen as they do. Sometimes seemingly good. Sometimes seemingly bad. We don’t always get it our way... Unless we choose that whatever way it is, is our way. When we choose to Amor Fati, to love everything that happens, to love our fate, then we will always get it our way. Because the way it is, is the way it is. Unchangable. And therefore it must be good, even if it sucks."

These words touched Y/N's heart. This was a contradiction to what she is experiencing right now. Love your fate. She would like to understand and accept what happened, she really wanted, but why is it so difficult to move on?

Because Neil is dead.

That was the only explanation for her. The end of a relationship would be more acceptable. If he were alive, things would be completely different now. However, grief is overwhelming. How could she just accept what happened?

"I... I gotta go." That was all she managed to say before picking up her bag and leave the penthouse, ignoring Kat's protests.

When the elevator doors closed, an exhausted sigh left her mouth and the instant she saw her reflection in the mirror, Y/N wanted to cry again. After three months alone, she thought visiting her friend would be a good idea. Kat was willing to help, but the problem was that Y/N is not allowing herself to be helped. As soon as the doors opened, she left the metal box and found the hotel lobby partially empty. Her watch showed it was 3:13 AM, this explains the absence of people on the street as well. In front of her car, she searched the bag for the key and coincidentally her cell phone started to vibrate. Probably the text messages were from Kat, but confusion hit Y/N the instant she looked at the identifier and saw that the messages did not belong to any of her contacts.

Stay away from the car

They put a bomb

I'm on my way

Her first reaction was to take a few steps back and look around, trying to understand what’s going on and find the person responsible for these texts, but Y/N was alone in the dark street. When she thought it might be an unnecessary prank, a black SUV approached at high speed. The car stopped just a few meters away from where she was, but that was enough to make her body freeze.

"Y/N, come on!" The man exclaimed, the urgency in his voice would have made her run immediately, but she didn't move. Her feet had frozen on the floor. This cannot be real. "Come on, get in the car! We don't have much time!" He tried again, it was possible to hear the sound of the other cars approaching.

Y/N watched in slow motion the moment he left the car and ran towards her, wrapping his arms around her waist.

"How is this possible?" She asked in a whisper, completely lost in his blue eyes.

"It's good to see you too." Neil admitted, feeling his heart race. She looked so fragile in his arms. Very different from the last time he saw her. "We have to go." He accompanied her to the car and as soon as Y/N took the passenger seat, he returned to his seat.

For her this moment was like a fever dream, so she just looked down and started counting her fingers. One, two, three, four, five... Neil noticed, but said nothing, just kept driving. The cars were fast approaching, but he would do everything possible and impossible to get Y/N away from these people.

"Give me your cell phone." He looked at her for a brief moment, but when Y/N didn’t react, he wasn't sure if she heard it, so he just took the phone from her hand and threw it out the window. That was enough to get her out of the numbness:

"What the fuck, Neil?!"

Despite the adrenaline rushing through his body, the man laughed.

"If I found you because of your cell phone, they can too." After that, he crossed the red light and made a risky turn, trying to end this chase. "Before you ask, no, this is not a dream. Unfortunately this is very real..." Neil didn't like what he saw when he adjusted the rearview mirror. "And now they are getting ready to shoot us."

That observation put Y/N on alert and she looked back, seeing a man with an AKS-74U and another with a Beretta M12.

"If you knew it wasn't a dream, why didn't you bring an armored car?" She ran her tongue between her lips, smiling at the man beside her. Neil tried to argue, but she just took off her seat belt and picked up the Glock 19 stuck in the vest he was wearing.

Y/N crawled out of the car and sat at the window opening. This encouraged the men in the two cars to start shooting, trying desperately to hit her. Neil shouted something that she couldn't understand and then she felt one of his hands on her thigh, giving her stability to continue with the plan. With her arm resting on the roof of the vehicle, Y/N aimed the gun at the car that was closest to them. Her intention was not to start a firefight in the middle of one of the main avenues in the city, but she had no other option. Holding her breath, she fired the first shot and the bullet hit the tire, taking the car out of circulation. Y/N celebrated while preparing for the second car, but dealing with this one was not an easy task. Now they were in a tunnel and, consequently, losing speed because of the other cars that came along the way. Neil left two pats on her leg, indicating that she had better get back in the car and that is what she did. Screams, honks and gunshots echoed through the tunnel, turning the place into a war zone. Whoever these men were, Y/N knew they weren't going to give up.

Tired of playing cat and mouse, she went to the back seat, getting on her knees. Through the broken glass above the trunk, Y/N adjusted the aim of her gun, ignoring the sniper and focusing on the driver. With another accurate shot, the bullet hit the man's chest and he lost control of the vehicle. The car overturned for a while, streaking the asphalt, but no other car was involved in the accident. Y/N sighed in relief and looked for another possible threat, just checking, but when she realized that the area was clean, she returned to the passenger seat, leaving the gun on the dashboard in front of her.

"Next time I'm going to get an armored car." Neil comments, stepping on the gas. "Nice shot, by the way."

"Anytime." Y/N smiled, trying to control her breathing.

With the adrenaline disappearing from her body, it was hard for her to believe that this was really happening. For many nights she cried, wondering what it would be like if Neil just came back to her, but now she was afraid to wake up and realize that it was just another vivid dream.

The sun was rising when they arrived in a shed away from the city. Seen from the outside, the place was a little scary, but the interior wasn't that bad. There was some equipment like trackers, walkie-talkie, bulletproof vests, weapons, ammunition; a table with a mess of papers and on the other side two beds and something that Y/N supposed to be a private bathroom.

"Where we are?"

We. That simple word echoed in her mind. Y/N thought that "we" didn't exist anymore.

"For now in a safe place. It's dangerous for you out there." He answered the question and took a bottle of water, handing it to her after taking a generous sip.

"Who are these people, Neil?" She wanted answers, lots of answers, and that frustrated the british spy because for the first time he didn't know what could happen.

Neil had a mission and that mission ended with him dying in Stalask-12, but after what TP did, everything changed.

"We have a name..." He wanted to say more, he wanted to reassure her, but that was all he had at the moment.

Y/N drank some water and left the bottle on the table, looking at some reports and photos. All photos were of the same man.

Lenard Vaher

"But apparently they don't just want you..."

It took a few seconds and when the realization hit Y/N, concern appeared on her face.

No, not him.

"Where's TP? He's safe, right?"

"He was going to see you when Lenard's men kidnapped him. This happened three weeks ago." And considering the anger in Neil's voice, finding TP was proving an almost impossible task, but in the midst of so much concern, one point attracted Y/N's attention.

"You said he was going to see me..."

"There was something he needed to tell you." Neil sighed, resting his hands on the table. A few strands of blond hair fell over his forehead, but he quickly shook his head back, as he always did. "He returned to Stalask-12, Y/N."

After that statement, the only sound that could be heard was Neil's footsteps closing the distance between them and the first thing she did was put her hand on his chest, feeling his heartbeat. Neil smiled. And that was not one of his famous smiles. That was a shy smile. His heart was beating like a drum and it was all because of her. Loving Y/N was something so special and pure, that Neil accepted his fate without a second thought. Saving the world, he was giving her a second chance to live, but now he is the one who received a second chance.

"I missed you every day." Before she could begin to consider the meaning behind his words, he settled his mouth upon hers, robbing her of thought.

She closed her eyes and melted against him, flattening her hands on his arms. Neil caught her bottom lip in his teeth, nibbling and licking at it until she thought she might perish from the intensity of the feeling. She whimpered at the sensation, and he rewarded the sound by deepening the kiss, giving her everything she desired. His tongue stroked hers, slow and insistent. A lush, decadent pleasure unfolded within them, snaking through their veins as though it had lain coiled in anticipation for years.

Just waiting for this moment.

––––––––––––––––––––––––

a/n – really hope you enjoy it and thank you soooo much for reading ;)

[harryhandstan]

gotta get better

gif credit

This concept has been in my head for a while now and it took me like a month to write and edit and just get it all out! I had surgery two years ago today and it was one of the most emotional, stressful experiences of my life simply bc I’m just a big baby lol. This is just something to celebrate that day and the fact that I’m still so happy it’s all over! Fluffy af as usual cause that’s all I know how to write. :)

Thankful to @bfharry​ and @bopbopstyles​ for not only inspiring me with their amazing writing but pushing me towards finishing this and reaching (even going over) my personal 5k goal! I appreciate you both so much!!

I recently saw a post about tagging triggers properly so I’m gonna do it that way but if I do it wrong or it doesn’t work PLEASE let me know and I will fix it immediately (just want to be sure all my bases are covered)

// needles tw, pills tw (prescription), anxiety tw // (if I missed anything I should’ve tagged please please let me know!!) and I’m sure there are some medical inaccuracies bc that whole day is kind of a blur for me haha 

as always likes/rbs/comments are welcome but absolutely not necessary :) 

final word count: 7.1k

//

"Y'nervous, angel?"

"Hmm?"

"Bout to chew your finger off. I know there can't be much of a nail left."

Your hand drops back to your lap. You hadn't even realized you were doing it. A bad habit of the nervous child you thought you'd long forgotten. He offers his left hand and you accept it, thumb swiping over the cross painted across his skin. He knows it's one of your favorites and you're thankful for the comfort. You don't know how many times he'd teased you about how you would eventually rub it off one day and he'd have to get it redone.

"S'a routine surgery, I bet they do them all day. You're gonna be fine."

You'd been over all this a thousand times before. Harry had to ban you from looking up the procedure online at one point. You became obsessive with worry. What if you're still awake when they cut into you and you can't talk? What if you feel everything and can't tell anyone? What if you don't wake up? He had shot down every one of your horrifying theories.

"How much longer before they take me back?"

"Nurse said it would be about 10 minutes when we checked in. Shouldn't be too much longer. Want me to check the board again?"

Checking in had only consisted of a nurse taking your name and giving you your bracelet for the day with an ID number. The number would help Harry stay updated on where you were throughout the whole process. The "board" was simply a tv mounted to the wall that frequently cycled through each patient's last name and ID number.

"No, no," You cling to his sleeve like a desperate child, "Don't leave again. She said they wouldn't update anything until I went back anyway."

Harry had left you only briefly when you first arrived. Hands in his pockets, wandering around like a lost child around the big, open expanse of the waiting room. He stayed where you could see him and the whole time you had anxiously chewed your bottom lip until he returned. You hated it, but you knew he was just as nervous as you. So you let him have that moment. To check his surroundings and release some of the nerves so he could come back to you, calm and cool as always.

When the nurse does call your name, you almost jump out of your skin. You freeze, unable to move. Harry stands and flashes the nurse a quick smile before turning back to you and offering his hand.

You shake your head, "I can't do this, H. I feel like I'm gonna throw up if I move."

"You're not, promise. Remember those breathing exercises we practiced? Do those. C'mon..deep breath in. Pause. Slowly let it out. Do it while we walk."

Slow deep breath in. Pause. Slowly let it out.

You remember how silly you felt the first time you did it. How it made you giggle at first. This is never going to work. But eventually it did. Anytime you got upset or started to overthink about this day, Harry made you stop whatever you were doing and sit down. Breathe.

It was a little difficult to do while walking. Your body wanted to pause your steps when your breath paused, but Harry tugged you along, you almost hiding behind him until you made it through a set of heavy wooden doors to a small space with a hospital bed and a curtain drawn in front of it.

//

The IV had had been your biggest dread, the fear overriding any logic that it was something you needed, instead of something the nurses decided to do simply to torture you.

Your face twists into a wince of pain when the needle goes into your vein, Harry standing over you, his face a mirror of your own as you squeeze his hand. When the nurse pulls away with a triumphant "all done!" you flash a look of surprise between your arm and Harry.

"Not that bad, eh? Think ya overreacted a bit about how bad that was gonna be?" He raises his eyebrows, waiting for you to shoot him a nasty look for teasing you.

"Maybe a little." You pinch your index finger and thumb together, indicating a minimal amount.

"Tiny bit more, babe," Another nurse appears from around the curtain and he laughs before speaking to her, "it's all she's worried about all morning."

"Honestly that's everyone's least favorite part. The rest of the day should be aces if you can handle that!"

Harry settles himself into a chair while the nurse goes through a myriad of questions. Any other surgeries? Allergies to medications you know of? Do you smoke? Drink?

Harry snorts when you say no to drinking, but quickly clasps his hand over his mouth when the nurse's head snaps to look between you and him.

"The occasional drink is fine, no worries. Nothing this morning though, right?"

"No, ma'am."

Your eyes meet his, a mischievous grin still plastered across his face. He mumbles a quick "sorry" while you try to pull your concentration back towards the nurse and the remainder of her questions.

"Alright, time for the good stuff," she passes you a small clear cup with two white pills, "First one is just something to keep you calm and relaxed, second one is to prevent any pain after the procedure. They'll give you something to make you sleepy when you get to the OR, but this might make you a bit loopy for now."

"This should be fun." Harry claps his hand in front of him, rubbing them together quickly. He leans forward in his chair, as if ready for a show.

"Yeah? Is she a happy drunk?"

Harry had only ever experienced you high on any sort of prescription medication once, almost a year ago when you went on a girl's trip with your best friend and twisted your ankle in an attempt to make it back to her car after dinner out one night. You calling him from an unknown ER in the middle of the night had terrified him enough to start packing a bag to fly to you before your best friend could grab your phone and assure him you were fine and she would put you on a plane home to him in two days as planned. He had teased you endlessly when he picked you up from the airport and for the next few days afterwards as you limped around on a bruised, ACE bandage wrapped foot.

But after too many wine drunk nights to count, he had enough stories to humiliate you with and the thought of any one of them being told now had you sinking further into the hospital bed.

"You could say that. Last time she.." His voice trails off at the sight of your eyes, wide as saucers, begging him to stop.

The nurse grins, her face kind and sympathetic to your silent cry for help.

"We're a little behind schedule this morning so it may be about 20 minutes before they come transport you, okay?" You nod, the effects of the sedative already working its way through your system, "Keep an eye on her? Make sure she behaves?"

"Yeah, I got her. We'll be fine, thank you so much." He's closer now, standing next to you again, a hand sliding up your arm to settle on your shoulder. You manage a thumbs up and a sleepy "thank you" as an affirmation that you appreciate all she's done for you.

"You're more than welcome. You'll have a different set of nurses in recovery but if you need anything until they come get you, just let me know, alright?"

"We will, thanks." His thumb ghosts across the front of your collarbone, the lightest of touches to soothe you, his eyes still focused on the nurse.

"Good luck! You're gonna do just fine, I promise."

The second she's around the curtain, Harry nudges you lightly, "Scoot."

"Huh? What do you mean..Harry, there's not enough room for you in this bed." Your head feels too light to deal with his nonsense now.

"Yeah there is if you scoot. C'mon. Hurry before we get caught. M’supposed to be keeping an eye on you, remember? Gotta make sure you don't fall outta the bed."

He's already wedged himself next to you, trying to make his tall frame fit into the limited space.

You move over as much as you can, the rail of the bed poking into your hip.

He tucks one arm behind your head, the other one thrown behind his own as a cushion.

"You feel more relaxed now, lovie?"

You scrunch down in the bed, just enough that you can tuck your head under his other arm, "A little. I don't feel sleepy enough though," Your eyes dart up, seeking the comfort of his face, "I'm scared, H."

"I know you are, baby," the hand behind your head shifts to cup around your arm, pulling you closer, "Just pretend you're home with me and we're taking a nice little nap together, yeah?"

"But you won't be there with me, not really."

"I'll be there when you wake up though. First thing you'll see when you open your eyes, promise." He runs a finger along the curve of your nose, "Close your eyes. Try to sleep, hmm?"

You shake your head, turning towards him to hide your face in his side, inhaling his scent.

"Want me to turn the light off? Would that help?"

"No," You toss the arm that isn't trapped between you two over him, holding tightly to his shirt, "Stay."

"Alright, then. We'll just wait," He tilts his head to rest closer to yours, "Have you thought about what you want to eat after?"

"Not really. M'too nervous to think about food."

"We'll think of something good. Whatever you want."

"You're gonna get us in trouble, better scoot back to your corner like a good boy." Your words come out unintentionally slurred and you weakly push yourself up and away from him as he slides off. He doesn't sit though, just stands near you, an anxious look flashing across his features.

"Hey, c'mere. Gonna be fine, routine surgery, remember?" You stretch your arms out to him, a plea to be near his warmth again.

He sits on the edge of the bed, facing you. You tug lightly at the sleeve of his cardigan, a feeble attempt to pull him closer. He indulges you, his brow still creased with distress.

"Know ya gonna be fine, just hate you have to go through it at all. Wish I could take it from you without all this." He gestures to the IV he knows you despise so much.  

"You have helped take it from me. All the sleepless nights you spent up with me, holding my hair back when I got sick. All the days after when I was too drained to get out of bed. You were there for as much of it as you could be. And you pushed me to go see the surgeon in the first place. You've helped me more than you give yourself credit for."

His fingers intertwine in yours, the pad of his thumb soothing over the front of your hand.

"Make sure you keep my phone with you, my mom will probably call you every 30 minutes for updates." A yawn stretches across your face, "She has your number too, bullied me into giving it to her last week when I called to tell her about the surgery."

He nods, patting his pocket to make sure both phones are still nestled there together.

Another yawn threatens to escape and you muffle it this time, more content to fight sleep to stare at Harry; his hair a perfect mess of curls under the harsh brightness of the hospital lighting. His face is more relaxed now, his eyes still focused on your fingers tangled together. He catches you, your eyes glazed over, too heavy and threatening to close.

"Darling, please close your eyes. I can see how tired you are," His fingertips sweep delicately over your nose again, as if he was lulling a baby to sleep, "You don't have to stay awake for me."

"Closing my eyes for just a second, alright? Not because you told me to though. I want to. Wake me up in 2 hours, don't wanna sleep too long."

Your eyes are already drifting closed, the last thing you hear is a chuckle; effortless, light as air, "I will, promise."

Soft kisses pressed across your face, "Sweet dreams, love."

//

His voice is the first you hear as you wake up in the dimly lit recovery room. Well, really it was more like a big cubicle, another space with a curtain drawn in front of it. Even with the floaty, dreamy feeling flowing through your system, you can still detect the worry in his voice.

"Harry?" It takes your mind a minute to catch up and process where you are and what had happened.

Oh yeah. Surgery day. No more annoying gallbladder. No more sleepless nights. Freedom to eat what you want and not be haunted by nausea and sickness from what you ate.

"How are you feeling? Any pain?" Suddenly a nurse in bright blue scrubs is there, way too animated and loud at the moment, "Pain scale 1-10?"

"I don't have any pain. Zero." You're aware of how high you sound and a giggle escapes through the haze. That earns you a smile from Harry, one that lights up his whole face and makes his dimples shine through.

"Awesome! Well then as soon as you're good and awake we're gonna get this IV out and go over some paperwork for both of you to sign. I want you to drink something for me too, so what would you like?"

You request a ginger ale and as soon as the nurse leaves to retrieve it for you, Harry scoots the chair he's sitting in as close to the bed as possible.

"How long was I out?"

"Couple of hours," He absentmindedly fixes your hair, looping various curls back around to their respective places, "Took a little longer than expected, you had a small infection so they had to make sure it hadn't spread."

"How much longer?"

"Long enough you had us all slightly worried." His hand trails down your cheek to cup your chin gently, urging you to look at him, "You sure you're not in pain? Now's not the time to do that stubbornly brave thing you do where you pretend nothing's wrong."

"I feel fine, really. Just a little tired, ready to go home."

He studies your face, trying to find any trace of dishonesty. When he's satisfied you're being truthful, he stands and extracts your phone from his pocket.

"Already talked to ya mum, but your co-workers were all texting you, asking how you were. Figured you'd want to handle that yourself, didn't know how much detail you would want to give them."

"Did you give my mother all the details? Infection and everything?"

"Um, no. I knew better than to do that. Promised her you would call when I got you settled at home."

"You promised or she demanded?"

"Okay..she politely asked that you call her when we get home."

"That sounds more like her." You roll your eyes, pushing yourself so you're sitting more upright in the bed.

"She just worries about you." He adjusts the pillow behind you, fluffing and tucking it where you direct it, against your lower back.

"I know. I'll FaceTime her when we get home to prove I'm alive."

"It's been a while since we've seen them, maybe we should plan a visit?" He plops himself back in the chair, leaning back as far as he can go; hands behind his head, eyes closed. You'd both gotten very little sleep the night before, you were too anxious and he was too gracious to let you suffer alone.

"Oh please, I'm lucky I even got time off to do this. My boss would never allow another break so soon."

"Maybe for the holidays?"

"Maybe..but only if you can go with me, you know they love you more than me by now anyway."

"They do not," He peeks one eye open at you, "They love us both equally."

You shoot a quick text to your co-workers, using the group chat between the few of you to make it easier.

I'm out! Feeling okay for now but that might change later lol

The nurse is back, apologizing for taking so long, "We've been so behind all day, it's crazy busy. I had to wait for your doctor to sign off on your release." She hands you a can of ginger ale, white bendy straw already poised and ready for you.

"Just need you to sign here," She holds a clipboard and a pen out to you and you balance the can dangerously in one hand while you scribble something that resembles your signature. Close enough. She gestures for you to pass the clipboard to Harry, "His signature goes under yours, just says he's responsible for you for the next few hours until everything wears off."

"This means I'm the boss, right?" He leans over to grab the board, a wink thrown in your direction. He's enjoying himself way too much at the thought of being in control of you for the next few hours. Smug son of a bitch.

She takes the clipboard back and pulls off a yellow sheet of paper, "This is just your copy of what you signed, and also has post op instructions for your bandages. Your prescription's been sent to the pharmacy, and there's a brief summary of pain management information on the bottom there just in case you need it."

"Thank you." You transfer it right to Harry's waiting hand, knowing he'll be the one surveying every word, making sure you follow everything to the letter.

"I know you mentioned earlier having a little bit of a drive home, so probably once you get her some food and pick up her prescriptions, it'll be time for another round of meds. Okay?" She turns to you again, "I know it sounds silly, but one of the most important things after this particular surgery is lots of walking. Otherwise you'll be miserable. Rest for a while when you get home, then get up every 10 minutes or so until bedtime. Don't let her skip that part, alright? Very important."

"I heard you weren't a big fan of this thing," She nods towards the IV in your right forearm, "So this'll probably be the best part of this whole process for you. We'll get this out and then you can get changed and we'll get someone to wheel you down and out of here, alright? Don't look and you won't even know when it's gone."

"Hey, think about what you want to eat, huh? Your first freedom meal. Yay!" He slips his hand into your left, raising your connected hands victoriously. You didn't think it was possible for you to love him anymore until this moment. The way he could so easily erase your fear was one of his many gifts you adored him for, "What are we having, babe?"

You don't even hesitate before answering, "Pizza, from Milano's. It's my favorite, other than that one place in Italy you took me to. Please? Oh and one of their salads, with the little bread knots on the side!"

He glances at the nurse, awaiting a reprimand for your meal choice.

"As your nurse, I feel I should remind you that while you can have anything you feel like eating, we usually recommend something small and light at first. Broth or soup with some toast, maybe. The salad may be fine, but the pizza might be a little heavy. Taking it slow would be best. But everyone is different."

"So..just cheese then? Maybe some mushrooms?"

You let your head fall back against the pillow, a foggy haze settling over you, "Plain cheese, no mushrooms."

"Alright, sounds good. Why don't I go call it in and pull the car around? Meet you out front?" He leans closer, a quick peck to your cheek before pulling his hand loose from yours and turning to leave.

"Hey, wait," You attempt to tug at his wrist, but fail, your brain still set to slow-motion. He takes pity on you and returns to your side, "Let's eat there. It's in the mall so we can window shop after we eat."

"You sure? You still seem a bit tipsy, honey."

You don't feel tipsy. Just tired, and hungry. Very hungry. As if on cue, your stomach makes a remarkably loud noise; an objection at not being fed for the past 12 hours.

"Alright, alright, calm down. " You let out an embarrassed groan when you realize he's talking to your stomach, "We'll eat there."

He kisses you again, closer to your mouth, "Missed."

"I did, huh?" He chuckles, close enough to your face now your noses are almost touching, "Let's try again."

This time his lips meet yours and you know he missed on purpose the first time by how amused he looks when he pulls away.

"One more for luck?" You can't resist letting the back of your hand wander over his face, before resting the palm of your hand against his cheek.

"I think I can handle that," He smiles before landing another quick peck to your lips, "Be good for the nurse while I'm gone. I'll have the getaway car ready in 10, yeah?"

//

You're certain Harry would have fed you if you would have let him, right here in the mall food court in front of everyone. But you refuse, insisting even, on carrying your own tray to the table. He chuckles when you pull your phone out of your sweater pocket to take a picture of your food, quickly uploading it to Facebook.

He watches you closely as you take the first bite, even pulling his own phone out to sneak a photo of you when you temporarily close your eyes to appreciate the indulgence of being able to eat one of your favorite foods again; free from that anxious feeling of whether or not it would settle right with your body later. You open your eyes the very moment after he captured the image.

"Harry!"

"You just looked so happy! I couldn't help it. You know I'll never post it anyway. Snagged a few of you earlier in your little blue cap they made you wear too." He flips back through to show you. You try to snatch the phone away, but he's too quick to pull his hand back and stash his phone in his pocket.

"When??"

"After you fell asleep, right before they came to take you back."

He takes a bite from his own generous slice of pizza in front of him before gesturing to your tray, "How is it?"

"Amazing. Even better than before, if possible."

His smile is bright, loving the satisfaction of seeing you actually enjoy food again.

Your plan to walk around the mall was cut short, you could barely make it through one store without yawning. You cling to Harry most of the way back to the car, his arm securely wrapped around you to keep you steady.

You doze off on the drive home, and when your eyes flutter open you find him opening the passenger door, offering a hand to help lift you out of the car and up the stairs into the house. Your foot stumbles on the first step, failing to make contact and you almost fall back.

"Easy," He giggles, an arm thrown behind your back to catch you before encouraging softly, "Try again."

When he's confident you're stable enough on your feet, he lets go to unlock the door.

You're greeted by a bouquet of flowers, a colorful arrangement of roses and lilies from Harry's band mates. You immediately recognize Sarah's handwriting on the card and make a mental note to shoot everyone a thank you text later. You don't know if it's the medication still in your system, the exhaustion of the day, or the overwhelming amount of love that makes you teary eyed.

Harry stands behind you as you admire the flowers and the card, arms curving around to hug you, careful of the large bandage on your upper abdomen and the two smaller steri-strips on your right side.

"How did they know pink roses were my favorite?"

"They love you, peach." He rests his chin on your shoulder, "Besides, you've only mentioned growing up with a pink rose bush in your Nanna's garden about a hundred times."

"I always loved it. Still do."

Your mind travels back to your earliest memories spent there; summers when you practically lived at the small house on the hill. Helping pick tomatoes and peppers from the garden, too warm afternoons spent with a book in your lap under the shade of a peach tree, your grandfather's corny jokes and loving smile. Your Nanna's too generous portions of food contributing to the few extra curves you still carried with you to this day.

You don't even notice the tears at first. They slip down your cheeks and land on his arm. Once you realize, you try to quickly wipe them away, but Harry sees.

"Hey..c'mon, I think your high's wearing off a bit, bub. Pajamas, meds, nap. Sound good?" He turns you to face him, using the sleeve of his shirt to brush away any tears that still linger at the corner of your eyes.

"What time is it?"

"Almost 3..why?"

"No nap. I'll never sleep tonight, and you know how grumpy I get when my sleep schedule is thrown off." Even with your declaration of not wanting a nap, you can't help but rub your eyes, a weak attempt to keep yourself awake. Any resolve Harry had to try to convince you to nap melts away. A smirk on his face, he knows you'll eventually crash later, most likely on his chest or in his arms. He's content to let you be stubborn for now.

"Okay, then. New plan. Pajamas, meds, movie. Better?"

"Better. You get everything ready and pick the movie while I change?"

"You don't wanna pick the movie?"

You wave him off, already shuffling towards the bedroom, "You're the boss today, remember?"

You take your time gathering what you need to get cozy for the rest of the day, selecting an oversized, well-worn tie dye t-shirt and leggings from your dresser. You even take a moment to dip into Harry's extensive sweatshirt collection, grabbing your favorite one. It's amazingly soft and still smells of him, a faint scent of his cologne and well..just Harry. You couldn't imagine anything more comforting.

In your pursuit to feel more lucid, you venture into the bathroom, taking a moment to wash your face. The cool water instantly refreshes you and pushes you closer to feeling like yourself again. Wanting your hair out of your face, you pluck a scrunchy from your shared collection of hair accessories. You quickly recognize that your arms still have that too heavy feeling of unconsciousness and after a few attempts to gather your curls into some sort of up-do, you give up and loop the accessory around your wrist to try again later.

Harry senses your frustration when you find him in the kitchen, two small green pill bottles sitting on the counter in front of him. He's already filled your favorite cup with ice water, and you gratefully take it and drink from it.

"What's wrong?" His brow creases with concern and you feel guilty for making him worry over something so silly.

"Nothing..just wanted my hair up out of my face but my arms wouldn't cooperate." You try to laugh it off to put him more at ease, "It's not a big deal."

You know it's only the weariness of the day still making you feel so emotional, clear-headed you would not be upset over something so small.

"Here. Let me try." He slides the scrunchy from your wrist and pulls you closer to him, moving behind you to gently work long fingers through your hair, gathering it all in a loose ponytail on top of your head before securing it around a few times with the scrunchy.

You let your shoulders drop with a deep sigh when he's done, it was such a simple thing, but it made you feel so much lighter. He spins you around to face him, a charming gleam of pride at his handiwork adorning his face, "Too tight?"

"No. Much better. Thank you, Harry. You take such good care of me always, but today..I don't know what I would've done without you. I made such a big fuss and probably made you miserable with all of my worrying." You're suddenly very aware that you are rambling, but when you catch a glimpse of his face, his smile is wide. So bright that the skin around his eyes is crinkling.

He leans towards you, lips stopping whatever words may have come next, arms wrapping around you to pull you closer in a soft, warm embrace. When he pulls away, his eyes bore right into yours, and your heart swells with more love than you could ever imagine having for one person. But he wasn't just any person. He was your person, your whole word staring back at you.

"I'm SO proud of you. You've been so strong today, always knew you had that strength in you, but seeing you take that leap of faith..doing something you knew you should despite your fear, that's all you, love. I can't take any credit for that. You've made me anything but miserable, trust me."

His face is still close enough to yours that you nudge forward, pressing your forehead to his, a silent appreciation of his affection.

"Any pain yet?" He pulls back, a thumb across your cheek, eyes still locked on yours.

"My head kind of hurts? And I still just feel kind of..drunk."

"You have always been a bit of a lightweight, babe. And a thief too, I see. S'that my sweatshirt?"

"Have not!" You swat playfully at his arm, "Maybe. Is that my hair clip in your hair?"

"Possibly." His eyes dart up to the swoop of curls on top of his head, a black plastic clip twisting it back and away from his face.

"Guess we're even then."

"S'pose we are." He tries to keep his eyes narrowed in a mock attempt of annoyance, but it quickly fades into laughter.

You decide against FaceTiming your family, hoping that hearing your voice will be enough. It seems to satisfy them at least for the rest of the day. You assure them that Harry is taking very good care of you and that everything went as smooth as could be expected.

He raises one eyebrow at you as you hang up, "As smooth as expected, huh? You aren't going to tell them the truth?"

"What's to tell? I had an infection and now it's gone. I'm fine, there's no sense in worrying them. We can give them the full story later."

He shrugs, fingers working to open one of the green pill bottles before passing one of the white pills to you, "For your headache, lovie. There's something here for nausea too if you need it. M'worried the pizza might've been too much. Maybe you should take one of these..just in case?"

"Harry, I promise I will tell you if I feel anything other than fine." Your hand runs from his shoulder down his bicep, squeezing gently, "Besides, I cannot take a whole one of those. If you think I'm a lightweight now..I'll sleep for the whole week if I take that."

He slips the bottle in his pocket, pulling you in to press a kiss to the top of your head, "We'll keep it close just in case, okay?"

"Sounds good," Your hand trails back up to his neck to work fingers through his hair, "Hey, thought we were watching a movie? What'd you pick?"

"Thought we could decide together. C'mon, let's get you comfy in bed."

"Ever the gentleman, always trying to get me in your bed."

"Hey! I am a perfect gentleman, thank you very much," He chuckles, a hand coming to rest on the small of your back, "Just thought you'd be more comfortable, you can prop up and stretch your feet out."

You let him tug you along for the second time today, thankful it's the luxury of your shared bed you get to settle into this time. He tucks you in softly, propping pillows behind your back and head.

"Comfy? Need anything else?"

"No, just need you to quit babying me so much and relax with me for a bit."

"Since when am I not allowed to baby you?"

You roll your eyes, "Never said you weren't allowed. Just want you to stop worrying so much, that's all."

"Good. Cause y'are my baby," No matter how many times you'd heard him say it before, it never failed to make you blush, "Do anything for you, y'know that, right?"

"I know," You look down at your hands, trying to slow your racing heart, "You never let me forget."

"Hey," He pokes your cheek, pulling your gaze back up to him, "I love you."

"I love you more, H."

He kisses your forehead, "Impossible. I love you most."

The reference to one of your favorite movies has you smiling at him, that dreamy feeling falling over you again, "Can we watch Tangled?"

"Sure, princess."

He sinks next to you, head propped up on your shoulder, navigating easily through Disney+ to find your requested movie.

Your eyes drift closed right about the time the lanterns are being released in the sky, a moment that normally leaves your face wet with tears, the soft vibrations of Harry humming along the perfect lullaby to push you further into your dream.

//

He wakes you later in the evening.

"Dinner's on the table if you want to join me."

"Time's it?" Your voice is still heavy with sleep.

"7. You were sleeping so deeply I didn't want to wake you, thought your body could use the extra sleep today."

"Yeah. It was nice, thank you." You stretch your arms forward, reaching for his hands to help pull you up.

"How do you feel?"

"A little sore. More sober, for sure."

Dinner is simple; a bowl of plain broth, salad, and toast. Exactly what the nurse suggested earlier. There's even a warm mug of tea waiting for you.

"With honey for my honey," He's so proud of his cheesy expression of love you cannot help but smile.

You look at him curiously when he sits next to you, the same boring meal set out for himself.

"Harry..you can eat what you want, babe. Seriously you've done enough today, more than enough to be supportive. It wouldn't hurt my feelings if you made yourself something different."

"Nah. S'fine. We're in this together, yeah?"

You raise your eyebrows at him playfully, "Did you have an organ snatched from your body today?"

"No, I didn't." He laughs, "I just meant food wise, love. It's vegetable broth, by the way, hope that's alright."

"It's perfect."

You nudge him lightly, an elbow to his side, shifting closer to ask for a kiss. He meets you the rest of the way, lips planted firmly on yours. When you don't pull away, he quickly adds another.

After dinner is done and you have another round of meds, the two of you end up in an awkward ball of cuddles on the couch. Harry flips through the channels on the tv before finding a show you both agree on.

But you're too restless, unable to find a position comfortable enough for you. You shift a few times, finally giving up and letting out a frustrated groan before tossing the blanket off the both of you and springing up and off the couch.

Harry doesn't panic, just grabs your hand before you can get too far away or lose your balance, keeping his voice low when he asks, "What's wrong?"

"Nothing hurts. I just can't get comfortable, and I don't feel right."

"What doesn't feel right, angel? Explain."

"I don't feel like myself. I don't know how to explain it. Just feel off."

He sees you're on the verge of tears and ascends from his spot on the couch, arms quickly enveloping you before placing a finger under your chin to pull your face up to look at him.

"It's probably gonna take a day or so to adjust, baby. Yes it was a minor surgery but it was a major change to your body." He's bending now to look right into your eyes, searching them,  "How can we fix it tonight, hmm? What do you need?"

Tears are free flowing, falling on the front of your t-shirt and down to the floor.

"Take your time. Breathe." A large hand smoothing warm circles firmly across your back; a balm for your restless spirit.

You pause, deep breath in before slowly letting it out, "I think I just need to move around for a bit."

"Let's go for a walk, eh? A quick one and then back to bed. Your mind needs more rest. How's that sound?" He taps your forehead softly.

"Okay, yeah." You nod your head, an approval of his plan.

"Don't worry about it, okay? Everything's gonna be fine. You're gonna be fine."

You nod again, scared your voice will break if you try to speak. He knew that those words held a lot of weight for you, he'd repeated them often throughout this whole process and to hear them now was a reminder of how safe you were. That with him, you would always be safe and loved.

Being dark outside meant you gracelessly padding through the house, up and down the hallway a few times and back to the living room. Harry stays close, encouraging you along with little claps and kisses to motivate you. When your stomach starts to feel uneasy, he urges you once again to take something for nausea. You agree to take a half a pill, knowing it'll help you sleep.

Despite the nap you had earlier and only being awake for a couple of hours, it doesn't take much convincing for you to settle back into bed.

"Harry?"

"Hmm?"

He's already reclined next to you, book in hand, the soft light from the lamp illuminating one side of his face. You're smushed against him, drifting between that sweet space of almost asleep and wanting to stay awake to enjoy any spare moment you get with him. His hand working through your hair helps push you towards the former of the two.

"I'm sorry to be such a burden today," Your words are slurring together but you continue on, just needing to get your thoughts out before he can stop you, "I don't deserve you and I shouldn't have overreacted so much about something so simple."

"Hey, none of that now," He lays the book on the nightstand, careful to save his place for later before pulling you closer to him, "You were not, nor have you ever been a burden to me. Just because you needed a little extra help today does not mean you aren't deserving of me or my love. You will never have to earn that. It's yours, always has been, will be as long as you decide to keep me around."

"Thank you. For all of it. I'll always want you."

"Always? Y'might change your mind someday, angel."

"I won't. Promise."

"Yeah? Me either."

A kiss laid delicately to the top of your head has your eyes dangerously close to falling shut again before another thought navigates its way through your mind and out of your mouth before you can stop it.

"H..what am I gonna do with a full week off from work?"

"Let me take care of you?"

//

And that's exactly what he does.

Mornings spent sleeping in, late breakfasts made together and afternoon walks. Evenings consisting of the two of you preparing dinner together or ordering takeout from some of the forbidden places you couldn't eat from before. Mugs of herbal tea before early bedtimes, you sweetly falling asleep to the sound of his voice reading to you most nights.

But his favorite part was that the scent of lavender was no longer cursed for you. Some nights before your surgery, when you simply could not fall asleep the pain was so unbearable, you would fill the tub with hot water and lavender scented bubbles to try to calm yourself enough to be able to drift off afterwards. It never worked, the heat always doing more harm than good. Harry would always be waiting for you, open arms and a soft towel to wrap you in.

So the smell became one you hated, memories of sleepless nights and nausea. But now you were free to use it again for what you always loved it for before it was cursed. In your body wash, lotion, even your laundry detergent; spreading the scent all over your shared space in as many ways as you could.

He even mentions it one night after dinner, when the two of you are pressed impossibly close together on the couch. His nose buried into your neck, inhaling deeply, pulling away to announce, "You smell like you again, love. Missed it so much." He burrows back in, placing kisses from your neck to your shoulder, ignoring your giggles and protests of how much it tickles.

A week later, the alarm wakes you sooner than you've become accustomed to, reminding you of your return to work. Harry's arm thrown over your waist pulls you closer as you try to leave the bed, a sleepy "Don't go." mumbled in your ear.

You do your best to peel yourself away from him, admitting silently to yourself how much harder it is for you to leave the warmth of your bed as it is for him to let you go.

//

2 years later, you have a scar you swear didn't heal right, and a man who loves you even more because of it.