#just DAYS SHORT OF APRIL FOOL'S DAY

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

HAPPY APRIL 1st, i wrote a fic about the suez canal fiasco bc it's still the funniest thing that's ever happened. synopsis is "grumpy gods from different mythologies argue over whose job it is to unstick the goddamn boat"

[proudartmaker]

Happy [Not]April's Fool Day.✨

*Actually it's my last year's art.

Character from my JSAB AU.

[radioconstructed]

⌖ HI, HEY, HELLO! IT’S ME, hi, I’m the problem, IT’S ME, SIMULCASTING LIVE ON AIR and LIVE ON CAMERA! I almost NEVER DO THAT! Are YOU tired of scam calls? I SURE AM! Let’s make these CLOWNS our little APRIL FOOLS! TUNE IN for WILD IMPROV, VOICE ACTING, SCAMMER MALDING, and COVERS OF THE SCAMMER PAYBACK SOUNDTRACK! ALL DAY!

[originalcontent]

happ the birth!

uh thanks i mean it's not my birthday but i appreciate the thought i guess

[rhysand-vs-fenrys]

What do you think your specialty area is in terms of fandom knowledge? I'm curious what everyone would say!

Oh god... I don't know...

I kind of generally focused on pure Canon when I was writing fics more often, tracking details.

I guess.... compared to other blogs... I brought up the timelines more?

Like, the best example of that is my fic Velaris. I think after the first 2 parts were up, I sat down and skimmed through ACOTAR (as in the first book, not the whole series) and actually made a full timeline of exact dates when things happened. Initially in relation to one another (assuming "couple" meant two and "few" meant 3 for things like "a couple days passed"), but you'd also get corrector lines like "it had been exactly three months" that helped fix where Maas had just said "several days passed" or other general terms.

I then reverse-engineered a timeline assuming Calanmai was May Day, established a general date (give or take a week) when Amarantha's deal was up, used THAT to reverse-engineer when the shields went up, and dialed the years, days, and months accordingly.

So like, in Part 4 especially, that's not a random number for years and days trapped, that is as exact as it's possible to get.

So, you could call it a specialty in terms of knowledge I had that I didn't notice other blogs featuring. But everyone was well versed in general Canon (I'm using past tense thinking back to when this blog was more active).

[kyometeru]

© uvuyai 2024. . . ~ ღ

Men who use their legs to keep you spread open while they finger you☺️(this is my [short] apology letter for my april fools joke😓) this was based off some chilumi nsfw i found on X. I'll link it later!

Tag ~ fingering, fem!reader(no pronouns),, overstimulation, squirting, mating press, no sex but implied at the end, eating outz, size difference, tit slapping + nipple play,

The way he just snaps you into position with your legs bent away to your shoulders beneath their legs. The way they pumps and ruthlessly thrusts their fingers into your clenching hole, sending you sky high into a bursting orgasm. The tears and drool running down your face says it all. Your trembling hands clenching the thigh of his pants.

You try your hardest to wriggle your way out of his tight leg lock but they're not letting you go till he's finished with you. You've come for the nth time of the day. your mewls, whines, and moans getting high on pitch every waking second. They like seeing you like this; all spread out, puffy pussy sucking their fingers in, eyes rolling up to heaven, and the sweet juices you squirted out onto their hand.

He leans down and licks a stripe of your cunt, you immediately jump from the sudden change of roughness. They tweak and suck at your clit. Their tongue licking long and forceful stripes of your pussy. Their nose pokes at your clit from time to time. Your tongue hanging out of your mouth and tilting your head to the side to hopefully avoid neck pain. You let out a sharp moan and gasp as you felt yourself wet their hand. Your toes curled at the erupting feeling. You are nearly embarrassed about how you've wet yourself. They raise themselves back up to look back at the mess they've made beneath them. That mess being you. Your eyes are so close to closing as you let out soft and quiet pleas for no more.

But as I've said before; he's not stopping now.

One more time at least baby is what they say and they slide their fingers back into you, immediately curling up into that spot he knows like the back of his palm. Their other hand slams down onto your tits, tweaking them in the process. You're so cute they think as they see you trying to escape his leg prison once again. They give you a hearty chuckle and a teasing smirk. Your eyes try to ultimately focus on them but he doesn't stop pumping his fingers into you. Poor thing, it was only 15 minutes in, but it must've felt like eternity for you. Which you hope was the last of, you clenched your teeth and let out a gut bursting orgasm.

He gets up and flips you onto your stomach and removes the rest of your clothes along with his. They aligned his thick, long cock to your sensitive hole. Oh boy, this was gonna be a long day or night for you.

The characters i think: Zhongli, blade, childe, Kaeya, Boothill, Aventurine, Dr. Ratio, Diluc, Wriothesley, Jing Yuan, Pantalone, Capitano, Dottore, Scaramouche, Alhaitham, Sunday, and you favs!

DO NOT PLAGIARIZE, COPY, REPOST, OR TRANSLATE MY POST W/O PERMISSION. DO NOT COPY MY LAYOUT. YOU MAY TAKE INSPIRATION BUT MAKE SURE TO CREDIT ME.

[darling-flora]

Short n' Sweet 1

oscar piastri x yn singer - social media au

fc : tyla

[part 1]

[part 2]

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yourinstagram

Liked by lilymhe, oscarpiastri and 11,159,944 others

yourinstagram oh what a coincidence.... anyways my birthday week was filled with so much laughter and joy, im so glad i could have spent it with such a loving group of people !! also a huge thank you too lily and alex ( and a few others they brought along ) for coming over and being there for me 😚❤

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yourbff what a great weekend !!!

liked by yourinstagram

lilymhe happy birthday week pretty girl !!!

↳yourinstagram thank you for being you 😚

alex_albon happy birthday 🙂👍

↳yourinstagram thank you albon 🙂👍

ynstan1 she's back in the studio after a 3 year relationship with jacob.... oh this album is gonna hit 🙂‍↕️

oscarpiastri Happy Birthday ! It was lovely to meet you 🧡

↳yourinstagram thank you mr pastry it was a pleasure to meet you as well !! 😊

yourbff2 happy to see you happy 💌

↳yourinstagram 😭❤

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yourinstagram

Liked by lilymhe, oscarpiastri and 11,181,944 others

yourinstagram is it that sweet ? 💋

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yourbff did you make your date take picture of you..

↳yourinstagram maybe...

lilymhe my pretty girlfriend

↳yourinstagram oh lily i’m blushing 😊

oscarpiastri is what sweet ?

↳yourinstagram the answer isn't pg13 ↳oscarpiastri 🤨 ↳oscarpiastri OHHHH ↳oscarpiastri yep got it 😉👍

ynhater1 she just got out of a 3 year relationship and is already dating.... 🙄

↳ynfan1 the relationship was off an on towards the end (based on what they've both said ) so it wouldn't be surprising if she's already lost feelings before they publicly broke up, plus jacob when on a date with his ex a week before y/n and him broke up THEN started dating her DAYS after they broke up . then karma got his ass and they broke up on y/n's birthday, he sucks 🤷‍♀️

yourbff2 looking good mama !!!

liked by yourinstagram

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ynupdates

Liked by ynfan1, ynfan2 and 81,944 others

ynupdates Y/n in Australia recently with an unidentified man.

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ynfan3 wait is this an april fools joke b/c it's almost april 1st

↳ynupdates no 😭 it's real

ynfan4 omg in australia ??? i hope she's not back with jacob...

ynfan5 she's in australia days before the australian gp.... i hope she's going !!

ynfan6 can't wait to see her at coachella !!

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ynupdates

Liked by ynfan1, ynfan2 and 181,944 others

ynupdates Y/n at the Australian Grand Prix, y/n is in the Williams garage with friend Lily Muni He.

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yourinstagram

Liked by lilymhe, oscarpiastri and 11,181,944 others

yourinstagram weekend down under 😚

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lilymhe need you at every race weekend !!

↳yourinstagram maybe not EVERY race weekend but a few 😉

alex_albon not very flattering pictures of me

↳yourinstagram just be more flattering next time 🤷‍♀️

ynstan5 a mother to many 🙂‍↕️

oscarpiastri got my first point's with you at a race... thats suspicious... thats weird 🤨

↳yourinstagram some people call me a lucky charm ⭐ ↳oscarpiastri can i call you that ? 😁 ↳yourinstagram of course ! you're my fav aussie after all 🧡 ↳ynstan8 "you're my fav aussie after all" oh ik jacob just fell to his knees

yourbff pretty girl doing pretty girl thing !!

logansargeant i made the photo dump 🥳

↳yourinstagram you deserve an award 🏆

williamsracing We're glad to have you anytime 💙

ynstan8 no oscar in the aussie gp photo dump.... 🤨

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yourinstagram

Liked by lilymhe, oscarpiastri and 19,181,944 others

yourinstagram my give a fucks are on vacation… espresso is out now🤎

See you tomorrow Coachella !! 💋

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oscarpiastri a tuneeee 🧡

↳yourinstagram 😊🧡 ↳oscarlvrr44 im watching yall 🤨

ynstan5 She's done it again!! 👏☕✨

lilymhe pop princess has returned‼️

liked by yourinstagram

ynstan6 Instant classic!! It’s already my summer anthem ❤️❤️❤️

ynstan81 she woke up this morning thought she’d write another pop hit

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yourinstagram

Liked by lilymhe, oscarpiastri and 19,181,944 others

yourinstagram coachella weekend 1 & 2 what a dream !! these were some of the most fun shows i've ever played 🧡, and i can’t believe you guys were already singing along to all the words in espresso. I feel so lucky. thank you to everyone who came to watch !!!!

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oscarpiastri Congrats ❤

↳yourinstagram ❤ ↳ynstan81 🤨

yourbff You ate! Obsessed with these performance's it was so much fun to watch

liked by yourinstagram

lilymhe So proud of you - all your dreams are coming true. ❤️❤️

↳yourinstagram 😪❤

ynstan2 literally devoured and left no crumbs

mclaren Y/n is popstaring harder than ever and i’m here for it 🥳

↳ynstan81 MCLAREN ?? what are you doing here ??? ↳mclaren we're y/n fans 🤷‍♀️

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yourinstagram

Liked by lilymhe, oscarpiastri and 19,181,544 others

yourinstagram silverstone was lovely !! 🧡

view all comments

oscarpiastri always lovely when your there ❤

↳yourinstagram 🥰

oscarpiastri i can finally say my girlfriend instead of friend during interviews now 😁

↳yourinstagram you just loveeee talking about me 🤭 ↳oscarpiastri yes i do 😘 ↳landonorris can confirm ↳alex_albon also can confirm ↳logansargeant as can i ↳yourinstagram PLS 😭

ynstan03 bro how is oscar dating Y/N L/N ???

landonorris FINALLY !!!

↳yourinstagram 🙄

oscstan44 HUH ???? THEIR DATING ?!?

lilymhe my prettttyyyy girl is happyy !!

liked by yourinstagram

ynstan23 this break up and in love album is going to go crazy 🤭

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oscarpiastri

Liked by landonorris, yourinstagram and 10,181,544 others

oscarpiastri Safety car didn’t get the memo. But what a weekend !! Im truly grateful for all the support this weekend from all the fans and people i love 🧡

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yourinstagram so proud of you !! love you pretty boy 😘

↳oscarpiastri love you !!! 🥰

oscarfan72 them hard launching is the best part of this season tbh

landonorris congratulations on everything 😉

liked by oscarpiastri

lilymhe he stole my girlfriend 😖

↳oscarpiastri snooze ya lose

mclaren Your best post this season !

liked by oscarpiastri

oscarfan90 i need a cigarette.... me and y/n were supposed to be together 😞

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yourinstagram

Liked by lilymhe, oscarpiastri and 20,181,544 others

yourinstagram Short n’ sweet is officially yours now!!! the making of short n’ sweet was one of the most special, honest, up and down, stupid and fun experiences of my life.

thank you to my brilliant talented friends, writers, producers, mixers, engineers, and creative minds that helped me bring this world and these songs to life. not a serious thought was thunk yet somehow they were.. lol i love you all and am so grateful.

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oscarpiastri IT'S HERE!!! So proud of you and love you endlessly.

↳yourinstagram love love love you ❤

oscarpiastri personal favorite is Bed Chem

↳yourinstagram oh yeah im sure 😘

ynstan32 taste is crazy… what an opening 🤯

lilymhe most perfect album of all time 💞

↳yourinstagram 😪❤

yourbff 8 down 💕

liked by yourinstagram

ynstan21 the drama in this album 🫨

logansargeant IT'S HERE!!! Can't pick a favorite!!!

liked by yourinstagram

ynfan74 coincidence is a crazzzyyy song 🤭

↳ynfan62 what's even funnier is the day jacob and olivia broke up (y/n's birthday) her birthday post she captioned it "oh what a coincidence" 😭

mclaren Dare I say…….no skip album??

liked by yourinstagram

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[tavyliasin]

BG3 2025 Creative Challenge!

Baldur's Gate 3 Fandom Artists, Writers, and Creatives!

I would like to invite you to a year of prompts to create whatever you would like! SFW, NSFW, whatever medium you would like to create in, the choice is yours! The idea is that we have on prompt per month so it should be easier to follow along without becoming overloaded. You don't have to create something specifically for the event either - if you have a WIP or other work you're publishing that month that fits the description you are more than welcome to add that in! I'll make a new post at the start of each month with the details of that month's challenge prompt, but this will be our masterpost to start the year off with a bang. Details below the cut!

The Year Of Prompts

January - New Year New You Pick a new character, trope, or pairing. Something you haven’t tried before. Make it a challenge to do something new and different! February - Romance Novels Go for something romantic, or if romance isn’t your cup of tea try something around the Necromancy of Thay instead! March - Marching Forwards March to your goal to finish a WIP or LongFic, or March into a new world by making something in an AU! April - Fools Rush In Make something humorous, something fun, whether it’s based on a meme or a joke pairing or just something with a bit more whimsy and some laughs~ May - Maybe? What If? Reverse a trope or reimagine a part of the canon - what if things were different? 

June - June Bugs Create something centred around a game glitch or exploit, past or present! July - Why Would July To Me? A piece around lies, deceptions, and other ways the truth can be twisted or obscured. August - When In Rome… A piece themed around the customs of specific races, backgrounds, regions, or Guilds. Are they followed or broken? That’s up to you! September - Seven Deadly Sins Pick one, or more, of the classic “seven deadly sins” and see how that can relate to one or more characters or tropes. October - Days of the Dead Create something around a character death, a memorial, a lingering ghost, or find a way a character might cheat their death or be brought back from it~ 

November - Gnomevember Either create something centred on Gnome characters from the game, or the other story points around them (Steel Watch, Iron Throne, Runepowder, etc) December - Season of Giving Create a surprise gift for someone in fandom, or write a piece around a gift being given by or to a character or characters!

Rules

The rules are very simple!

Create your piece in 2025, preferably within the prompt month but if you post a little early or late that's fine too!

All pieces must be your creations or a collaboration - No AI or chatbot content

You are free to work in whatever medium you like for each and every prompt!

Set your own goal - you can do a short 100-500 word minific, some simple sketches, or write a whole 10k word one shot epic, or draw a full page comic. What matters is that it's a goal YOU want to achieve!

There will be options to submit prompts and fill prompts in the AO3 collections - this is entirely your choice! You can take a prompt if you like, work on something you had already started, or create something entirely new!

Have fun!

The Goal

The aim really is simple - to set some targets, and work on at least 12 things this year so at this time next year you can look back on your progress and celebrate your achievements. If you miss a month or turn in late, that's fine! Do what works for you!

AO3 Collections

For those of you that would like to, there will be a parent collection for the year event as a whole and some sub-collections for each month to allow us to keep everything nice and organised. It's completely optional if you would like to put your work on AO3 or not - you're more than welcome to just keep it on Tumblr or wherever you usually share your works!

This event is for you to use however you feel best, to inspire creativity, working towards manageable goals, and trying something different.

Social Media Tags

Use the tag #BG32025 if you would like to! I don't know if anyone else is using this one but I'll cross my fingers that we're the only ones~ Feel free to share the event and please do support each other through our creativity! A character or pairing or kink or trope might not be your cup of tea, but let's celebrate how it is there for someone else who might really enjoy it, and keep a positive and passionate view whilst respecting boundaries by tagging works appropriately as always <3

Thank you for reading this far and I hope to see you all through they year adding your works and creativity to our fandom <3 we have so much amazing talent here, I'm delighted to have the privilege of seeing it all~

[thefreakandthehair]

apollo, who?

prompt: beach day | pairing: steddie | wc: 1.5k | rating: teen & up | tags: eddie munson pov, athletic steve, post-canon fix it, pining, reciprocated crushes | written for @pearynice for the @strangerthingswritersguild April Fools exchange! 💕☀️🌊

There are three absolute truths when it comes to Steve Harrington: 

The first is that Steve is a gifted athlete. 

The second is that Steve was born to thrive in the summertime. 

And the third, much to Eddie Munson’s chagrin and horror, is that the combination of the first two truths will be his undoing. In public, no less, because the universe has apparently concocted a plan to let Eddie live but to make him suffer nonetheless. 

Unloading the van had been easy enough— Steve grabbing the cooler stacked to the brim with soda, water, and snacks and Eddie watching as he’d trekked through the sand to where Robin and Nancy set up their chairs and beach umbrella. Most of the kids were long gone already, staking their claim with blankets and towels a few feet away from Robin and Nancy, leaving Eddie to snag the sunblock he’s basically been made to swear a blood oath to Wayne that he’ll apply generously over his scars. 

He leans back over the passenger seat to grab it from the center console, along with his walkman and sunglasses, and when he turns back around, he stops dead. 

Steve’s shirtless.

In the span of ten seconds, Steve’s already shirtless on the beach, nothing but swim trunks hanging from his hips, and Eddie realizes he’s underestimated how fucking beautiful this sight might be. 

The edge of Lake Michigan laps at the rippled sands as Steve reels back and tosses a football that Eddie’s pretty sure materialized out of nowhere to Lucas a few yards down the shore. All of his freckles and moles and scars out on full display, the sun beats down on his tanned skin and uncharacteristically messy hair that Eddie’s watched slowly morph from chestnut to ash brown over the course of the season. 

As Eddie applies his stupid sunblock, he lets himself stare unnoticed. Lucas throws what Eddie assumes is a good pass if Steve’s celebratory, “Great spiral!” means anything and when he puts on his sunglasses, it’s more to shield the blinding light of Steve’s smile than the sun. Maybe it’s cliche, maybe it’s overdone and contrived, but Eddie can’t stop himself from comparing Steve to a Greek fucking God. 

Apollo, who? 

El appears next to Steve and Eddie continues to watch— about three layers of sunblock in at this point because he’s lost track— as Steve demonstrates something. Holding the football in one hand, he points at the laces and seems to check in with El for understanding before handing it over to her and adjusting her grip slightly. When she attempts to throw it to Lucas, it falls short and lands in the sand just a few feet away from where she and Steve stand. 

Eddie’s chest fucking swells as Steve trots over to grab it and simply hands it to her again, smile in place to counteract El’s pout. Three or four tries later, the ball flies straight enough for Lucas to catch it and Jesus H. Christ, Steve cheers like she scored a touchdown, or whatever the fuck it’s called. 

He can’t leave the side of the van. If he makes his way down to the beach, it’ll be all over for him. He’ll have to hide in the water the entire time, and now there’s too much sunblock on his face to blame the inevitable flush on sunburn. It’s fine, he can hang back. Everyone looks preoccupied anyways and with any luck, no one will notice he’s not enjoying the surf and sand with everyone else until it’s time to leave— 

“Eddie!” 

Right, he thinks to himself. I have no luck. 

Steve waves at him to come join, turning that sunshine smile directly at him and it’s a direct hit. Apparently, even on the opposite side of the sands, he’s still a goner. 

“Eddie! C’mon, what’re you waiting for?” He calls out again, both hands resting on his hips. 

It does nothing to quell his urge to stare at places friends aren’t supposed to stare at. As far as he knows, the only person to have picked up on his unfortunate crush is Nancy, who’d seemed to understand the importance of discretion and hasn’t said a word. If he can leave this beach day with his secret intact, he’ll chalk it up as a success. 

“I’m comin’, I’m comin’!” 

With a deep breath, he locks and slams the passenger door to the van and walks out onto the hot sand, barefoot with his sneakers in one hand, SPF 70 in the other, and sunglasses hung over his nose. Distantly, he recognizes the grittiness of the sand beneath his toes and the earthy scent of the freshwater stretching out for miles in front of him but more acutely, he just keeps his eyes on Steve. 

Please let these glasses be tinted, he thinks. 

“Finally, what the hell were you doing up there?” Steve asks when he makes it down the narrow path lines with tall grass. 

“Aw, did you miss me, Big Boy?” Eddie drones with a smirk. If he just acts normal, no one will know the difference. It’s not like Steve ever flirts back—

“And if I did?” 

He hasn't planned for that response. All he’s prepared for is a gentle eye roll, maybe a flustered laugh or furrowed brow, and now Steve’s shirtless, sun-baked, sweat dripping from his temple and suggesting he missed him. 

What the fuck. 

“Heads-up!” Lucas yells and Steve turns just in time to take two steps backward and catch the football coming in their direction. 

There’s no way for Lucas to have known he’d just saved Eddie from something horrendously embarrassing, but he’ll find a way to thank him all the same. 

“Ever throw a football?” Steve holds the oblong ball in one hand, wiggling it at shoulder height with a grin. “I taught El how to throw a spiral, so I think I can teach you, too.” 

Okay, actually, he’s still being subjected to something humiliating. 

“Sports have never really been my—”

“Don’t start with that, c’mere. It’s easy.” Steve gestures with a nod of his head for Eddie to join him further out on the beach and like a satellite to its orbit, he follows. 

It takes way more attempts than it did El— something Max was all too quick to point out loudly— but he does eventually throw something that Steve considers a spiral. Maybe it would’ve taken fewer tries if Steve hadn’t insisted on standing directly behind him, adjusting his stance and grip with his chest damn near pressed against Eddie’s back. 

Of all the unfair cards life has dealt him, this has to be the worst. More than once, he makes eye contact with Nancy who raises an eyebrow and smirks before returning her attention to whatever she and Robin are talking about. 

Probably him. Him and Steve and his dumb, dumb, dumb crush that’s ruining his life. It’s fine. 

When he finally throws the ball at an acceptable angle, Steve claps him on the shoulder and stands next to him, effectively draping an arm over both shoulders. 

“See? That wasn’t so bad, was it?”

He swallows and turns, breath catching his throat. All of the sun has brought Steve’s freckles to the forefront, a shade darker than usual with new tiny pinpricks of color appearing along his nose with a faint pink hue along his cheekbones. 

If they weren’t in public, he’d do something very, very stupid. Instead, he clears his throat subtly and finds words. 

“Sure, yeah, I’m a regular sports guy now, Steve. Guess I’ve gotta find something to teach you, huh? Y’know, return the favor?” 

“I’ve always wanted to learn guitar. You can show me the basics some time. Or uh,” Steve grins and lowers his voice. “I’m sure there are some other things we can learn together.” 

Eddie’s fully lost track of how many times he’s been caught off-guard so far today, but this one takes the cake. Steve’s fucking flirting with him. Actually flirting with him. Beating him over the goddamn head with it, really. 

“Yeah! Yeah, uh, yeah,” he repeats, smooth. “To both, I mean. Yeah, to both.” 

Steve squeezes his shoulder and unravels his arm with a hopeful expression. 

“We’ll talk more when we aren’t surrounded by nosy shits, especially those two,” Steve nods at Robin and Nancy who wave with their fingers. “In the meantime, race you to the water?” 

“What is it with you jocks?”

He barely has time to get the question out before Steve takes off, plunging into the water a solid foot before Eddie even reaches the shore. 

“That’s cheating, Harrington!” He bellows, running through the sand to join him, heart thundering between his ribs and head still spinning from what just happened. 

“Sounds like what I’d expect from someone who just lost,” Steve shoots back, taking a breath and submerging himself before popping back up. 

Hair slicked back with the freshwater of Lake Michigan, Eddie watches as Steve runs both hands through it, then down his face and back into the lake. Water droplets glisten off his skin and Eddie wades a little closer, finding Steve’s hands once they’re submerged enough to disguise it. 

“Oh, contraire,” Eddie muses. “I feel like I just won.”

[emeritusemeritus]

One, two, three? [Fred Weasley x Reader]

Title: one, two, three?

Pairing: Fred Weasley x Reader.

Timeline: Non-specific.

Summary: Fred gets up to mischief pretending to be his twin.

Warnings: None? Slight deception, pranks, humour. Fred’s a menace. Sorry Cho, I needed a victim.

Word count: 1.3k

In honour of our April fool’s birthday kings, HAPPY BIRTHDAY FRED AND GEORGE. Please accept this little prank-filled drabble as a gift.

"Hi, um George?" You heard a voice behind you say meekly, causing you and your companion to turn around in confusion.

You'd been in the library for most of the afternoon with Fred, studying for your end of term potions exam whilst he looked up ingredients for a new project him and George had been developing, some new potion that made the drinker glow like a candle. To your surprise, Fred was actually concentrating for the most part and had actually allowed you to get some valuable studying done without much interruption, though you could sense his concentration wavering and boredom taking over him as he got increasingly fidgety.

George had managed to get detention with Mcgonagall today before dinner, though Fred had managed to avoid the punishment entirely on account of being the first to flee. George had mentioned in passing that his charms partner would be meeting you all in the library after the last class of the day for them to work on their homework together and of course you thought nothing of it when Cho joined you in the library.

Charms this year had been a little different as you were sorted into classes of grouped abilities with some students able to take a short course for their OWLS from the year below, so that they could study another elective if they wished. Due to this, a few students from the year below had entered your class at the start of the year and you were no longer lumped with just the Slytherins, the short course students were mixed houses.

"Oh hey y/n," Cho said as you turned, offering you a shy little wave with her free hand as she clutched a handful of books to her chest. You'd never really talked much with Cho but she always seemed nice and friendly. You greeted her and began to correct her previous misstep when Fred leapt to his feet, pulling out a chair for her.

"Hi Cho, what are we working on today?" He said with a wicked glint in his eye, pretending to be George. You looked at him momentarily with a disbelieving look before rolling your eyes, knowing that he would deeply enjoy playing along as his twin to cause a little mischief.

"I thought we could start with the non verbal spells?" She says, taking a seat and spreading out an array of books, parchment and quills for the task.

You barely paid attention to them as they talked, though your attention was drawn in every so often when Fred would drop little hints that he might not be the right twin, though they went entirely over Cho's head. She had no clue that she was actually talking with Fred and you had to say that it did amuse you slightly, though not as much as it did Fred. Around half an hour had gone by, George still hadn't showed and you could tell that Fred was getting bored of the act and was getting close to actually doing the work which he had no intention of doing, so he decided he would feign needing to meet Fred.

He shot you a wink as he stood, subtly kicking his bag under the desk towards you and walked out, leaving you and Cho alone. You chatted for a little while, mainly asking her how Quidditch was going, before a familiar red head rejoined you.

He had taken off his school jumper, untucked his white shirt and you noticed that his hair has been tussled slightly with a little more of the short, front strands pushed back. It didn't fool you for a second but you were intrigued to see if it could pass with someone that didn't know them, like Cho.

"Cho right? Hey," Fred says with a smirk and a nod of his head before he slumped down onto the seat beside you where he'd occupied only minutes before. He stretched out his arm around your shoulders as he took a seat and had said a simple, "hey gorgeous," to you as he grinned ear to ear.

"Hi, Fred right?" She says sweetly, her eyes squinting a little as she looks at him, hey eyes flicking between the pair of you and his arm around your shoulders, deducing that it must be your boyfriend.

"Yeah, this is Fred," you confirm, your tone a little drier than usual as you pointedly looked at him. He squeezes your shoulders tighter in a mock warning before offering a warm smile to Cho.

"You're George's charms partner right? Have you seen him? I've been looking everywhere for him," he says with a smirk. You roll your eyes and shift out of his hold to hunch yourself back over your potions book, subtly shaking your head at his actions, knowing he was enjoying himself way too much. Cho however, nods enthusiastically before looking around slightly with her eyes as if searching for her charms partner.

"He actually just left, he was looking for you," she says shyly, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear where it had fallen out of her headband.

"Really? Interesting," Fred says, leaning back in his chair. "I'll go find him." Fred leans forward and kisses you on the head before walking casually out of the library doors, leaving you alone with Cho once again.

"They spend a lot of time together don't they?" She says, breaking the somewhat comfortable silence and you have to hold back a laugh as you look up from your book.

"Yeah I've always said they're more like conjoined twins than identical," you joke, sending her a warm smile. You knew she was probably uncomfortable having never spent much time around you and the twins and so you tried your hardest to be nice to her, despite Fred's silly prank.

"Sorry about that," Fred says rushing back in, now wearing his school jumper once again, pretending to be George.

"Oh Fred’s just been, he was looking for you," Cho says as she looks at 'George', pushing the textbook over to him as he takes his seat.

"Really, so he's around?" 'George' says with a tone of surprise, suddenly looking around as if he'd just missed his twin.

"I'm gonna scout out the courtyard, he's supposed to be meeting me, bloody Fred," he says playfully, rising from his seat once again and walking back through the doors.

"Couldn't see him," Fred says, walking back in not two minutes later, once again without his shirt and with slightly more tussled hair.

"He went looking for you in the courtyard," Cho says, looking up briefly from where she was taking notes on a piece of parchment. If she was annoyed by the constant disruption, she didn’t show it.

He shrugs and takes a seat next to you, trying to slide you closer to him by scooting your chair up towards his as he smiles widely at you, beaming with pride that his little prank was working.

"Hi, sorry I'm so late," George says, the real George, as he rushes in, throwing his bag off his shoulder and placing it onto the table looking a little puffed. He takes off his robe, placing it down on the back of the chair and you immediately notice that he'd not wearing uniform, or rather he is but he has a thick wool jumper on over the top that's zipped right up to his throat, hair soaking wet from the rain.

Cho suddenly looks between them and then to you with a face of alarm, trying to process what was happening as she takes in his different appearance.

"Wait, there are three of you?!"

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[xino-writes]

Life Series Seasons are based on THEIR WINNER. As in, that season’s winner. Sure, it obviously fits the previous winners, obviously, but. Y’know. They gave their winners an advantage with the ruleset in some manner.

3rd Life.

Grian wins the first game. The beginner game. Befitting of it’s creator to win it first. After all, he’s more acquainted with it, he’s willing to bend the rules and fight tooth and nail to the end. He gets bent to Scar’s will, but that’s what kept him alive longer. He is like the older sibling palying a board game against their younger sibling(s) and beating them.

-

Last Life.

Scott is someone who values his allies lives over his own. The ability to give and receive lives clearly reflect this. If given the chance, he’d have given an ally a life just to keep them around longer. The Boogeyman, a way to break alliances, the whole reds can’t ally with non-reds, they’re ways to combat this. And still, he could thrive.

-

Double Life.

Pearl. The lonely one wins the series where the entire point is you will forever have an ally. Your lives are linked to another player and yet Pearl is still alone. And she won for good reason. After all, if another pair made it to the end, there can only be one winner. In the end, we would’ve had another cactus ring situation, and Pearl won instead. She was the winner curated for this season.

-

Limited Life.

Martyn winning the time-based season suits him. (.. i haven’t watched LimLife. I can’t say a word on this.)

-

Real Life

Cleo won the joke April Fools season. She won the season where everyone was in a new situation and was thrust into the game with VR. It was full of jokes and gags and truly befitting of The ZombieCleo. She won the season where everything was new and she prevailed. She knows how to take advantage of the way that people work with new situations. (We see this with the Crastle especially. The entire series was new and she used Bdubs’ surprise at being allied with the Desert as a way to rein him in from doing something he may regret. [targetting the desert, etho, anyone who hurt the crastle, etc.])

-

Secret Life

Scar won this season for good reason. In past seasons he would go on short side-tasks and return to his main task in the end. He was isolated for good reason, too. He’s a good player. Such a good player, and yet he’s always died before making it to being a winner. But being isolated helped him see his potential as a winner. And he won. It’s also ironic that the series that ends the curse starts with the man who started the curses in the first place. (Grian’s Widow Curse, his alliances led to the Canary Curse, etc. etc.)

-

Wild Life

Joel. Oh, Joel. The wildcard. He is wild on red and wild on green. He thrives in the wild and that’s how he won. He is known for his wildness and the series based on it is clearly the reason why he won this time. There is no other way fitting for him to win. He was reined in, yes, but that’s also how he won. He wasn’t as wild as before because there was already a way to be wild. The Wildcards. Competing with the gimmick of the day would result in his death and there’s got to be reason for his wildness in the end. He isn’t like this for no reason, after all.

[cixteenyne]

i nEED more izu content and you are the best of the best so i needed to come to you

personally, the thing that i think gets over looked about midoriya is that

1: he’s strong as fuck??? (gets me so weak in the knees heaven knows)

2: BLACK. WHIP.

jesus christ he’s just!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i think he’s so neat i want him to do things to me

anyways, smutfic about him coming home to reader after she’s been a brat to him all day & him being such a sweet & loving dom but also that type of menacing & powerful hero he is. he loves his s/o to no end, but will not hesitate to put her in her place!!! wow my stomach turns just thinking about it

basically, brat tamer izuku, using blackwhip. i’m so down bad for him it hurts

I remember getting this ask and salivating at it, yet I had no idea how to write and interpret it into a full blown post instead of just a thirst and I just didn’t feel like posting (I meant it when I said I’m barley consistent). SOOO in April 1, no, this isn’t an april fools joke!! I bring you, angry izuku ..

Warning(s): vulgar wording (yk how we do), restraints, mean izuku/passive aggressive, manhandling, inappropriate use of black whip, brat taming, slight intimidation if you squint, Fem reader. Halfway proofread…😒

‘Patient and Gentle’

Izuku had been so sweet to you all day, so caring and soft and understanding- he always had been, so it’s just to say he’s being himself as per usual. But, you. You.

Just so snide today, snappy little thing.

What did he do? He doesn’t know- he doesn’t care to know, he won’t listen to you if you try to explain, well- he will; just won’t let it linger. He’s past that.

You’re past that.

He sighed as he walked into the room, the door shutting softly behind him despite the off energy he had around him.

He doesn’t move from his spot, his hand still resting against the door as his head peers behind him. To you. He just gazes for a while, only a while before- clip! Another snappy remark, it was just ‘clip, clip, clip’ with you today, that’s all he could portray it as.

Something like a… like a-

“oh, that’s weird.”

Or a short ‘clip!’ Of a

“whatever.” In a certain tone a- cadence, if you will.

Why were you speaking this specific way to him. And why was it pissing him off so.. damn.. much…?

He still looking at you, yet at some point he’s turned around a tuned out whatever snide remark you’re sure to have made by now. His eyes keep traversing from one point to another, each point having something to do with you.

A short question of; ‘is there a problem?’

Is there?

“I don’t know.” A shrug from you. And a back fucking turned.

It makes his blood simmer to an 8 on a stove.

His footsteps are light yet foreboding as they advanced toward you, to you standing so.. he can’t even find the words, how does one stand in indifference? That must be it.

He’s in your personal space now, he’s smiling so sweetly at you; the way he always had, so patient and gentle. Yet his words are cracked with the tone, clashing with the way they dance out of his lips.

“Is there a problem..?” Is there? He needs to know, he had asked you a question, he wanted an answer. He didn’t ask for an ‘I don’t know.’ He asked for an explanation. Did you not understand that?- or, were you being a dumb whore on purpose?

You shook your head, not meeting his eyes. There was no problem. so, what the hell is your deal today?

“Speak up, baby..”

“No..”

you shook you head again. It was mumbled out, maybe due to his body smothering yours, but at least it was in words.

“Then what’s wrong, baby? Yr’ you acting like that.. hm?”

He whispered to you, talking you down as if you were a kid experiencing anger for the first time. His faux sad expression was beginning to make you feel silly. Good. That’s was good.

You look away- or you try to, yet his face follows yours, not letting you escape his eyes.

“Don’t- no, you don’t do that. You look at me. ‘K..? I don’t like that.”

He really didn’t. And you knew that. He looked a little disappointed too, shame. What a shame, yet you were shameless.

He sighed, a click of his teeth as he let silence permeate the room.

A cold solid-? A chilly.. rope.. it slid around your neck, slowly and purposefully. It’s grip tightening with no intent to let go. There was a tug on it, forcing you the look up at him.

Black whip. He activated it and was using it as a leash, he thought it was fitting. Act like a bitch, get treated like one. ‘S only fair.

“Izu’s a little mad okay..? And he’s sorry… but- he needs to teach his girl… m’kay..?”

You stood in place, slightly defiant, yet not outright. So he tugged. Hard. And you stumbled out of place.

“C’mon.. T’ the bed.. s’right there..” a slow step forward, then the rest followed suit, she was hoping for a smooth walk over to the bed, but she was pushed so meanly by him.

He didn’t say anything as he bullied her with such a sweet face. Always so patient and gentle. Even when he’s not.

He rolled the black whip in his hands, his quirk tightening around him as he tugged your neck back, getting on top of you. He had pushed you onto your tummy. He even got down low next to your ear to taunt you like a bully.

“Izu has to do this okay..? Keep his girl good. ‘Zuku doesn’t like disobeying whores. He doesn’t like mean girls.”

Being so mean to him all day. Whore. How dare you. But don’t worry, he loves you so much, he’s willing to teach you himself- just how he likes his girls.

He reached around under your hips and undid your button. And a ‘ziiiip!’ Oh, it was foreboding. Your body was heating up, it was like an oven with no limit.

Your pants were being pushed down, and you keened. A whine at being exposed to casually as he shushed you.

“Shhh.. shh, lemme take it off.. all of it.”

Your pants couldn’t hit the floor before his hands were always working off your shirt, as he let black whip go for a while to get it off.

Yet his hands were right back on it. Harsher, no bra. truly a whore.

He filled his palm with your breast, the soft supple flesh making him groan, a grind of his hips into your ass. He was going to fucking ruin you for this.

His breathing was hot and heavy against your neck, making goosebumps rise and quicker across your skin.

His hands began snaking again, from your breast, to your tummy, your hips, the inside of your panties. Your pussy. So, so.. wet already.

And then he was dragging them down your laps and kicking them away. His finger just playing with your pussy for a while, two finger sliding down the crevices, a palm cupping it whole and rubbing, and a single finger on your clit. Slowly rubbing and pinching, tapping.

His lips kissing your neck so sweetly. So patient and gentle.. a suck across your skin. And moan and a whine, it only made him harder.

He stops his playing- his rubbing and you whine again, disappointed, and it makes him smile a little more sweetly, or cruelly, he can’t tell himself at this point, he just knows he loves watching that sweet face of yours contort.

Black while fluctuates and another tendril seeps out and bind your arms, forcing them to your back. Your pussy drips at the strain in your shoulders.

He hadn’t taken anything off yet, and he didn’t plan too! He didn’t need to. He undid his belt, slowly. Letting the ‘clink!’ And the ‘dink!’ Of the metal fill your ears. Letting you anticipate.

His bulge is almost painful, the strain of it is almost good, yet it still annoys him- having it be let free was heavenly.. his green was deep yet still so sweet, a whine in his voice that never quite went away even as it deepened with age..

His cock bobbed up and as it fell back down, heavy under its own weight, the tip tapped your ass, leaving it to ripple. The sight made him keen yet it dipped into a moan as his own hand wrapped around his aching dick. It drooled precum.

Black whip flickered as his mind was muddled with pleasure, yet his control of it was impressive despite the situation. He wasn’t number one for nothing.

“He’s gonna teach you.. ‘kay..? Fuck… look so good baby… if you weren’t such a mean slut today-.. I’d be a little gentle..”

the way he spoke was as if he ran a marathon, and his voice always had the undertones of a whine.

He pushed his hand to his shirt, as if the action took everything in him- and began to unbutton it in a hurry, he felt stuffy in the article of clothing and he needed it off- or atleast open.

He tightened black whip, wrapping his hand in it further to force you into an arch, stroking his cock and lining it up with your pussy, cunt dripping with arousal.

The tip tapped against the entrance, then it pushed in, and in, and stretched, each inch was fucking delicious. Your eyes rolled and you bit your lip, and he heard it- he didn’t like it, if that angry tug of black whip was anything to go by.

He couldn’t help but slam the rest of it in, making you yelp. His grunts are uncontrollable and he doesn’t care. he whines behind you as his tip just leaks and leaks inside of you, yet he hadn’t cum yet.

Just made it more slippery and the sounds -god, the sounds- the sloppy and wet sounds of his cock driving into you cunt wasn’t drowned out by your combined moans.

He kept it tugged in your little leash as he keeps thrusting, his voice raw with pleasure and still a bit of irritation.

You still had upset him earlier, he had every right to take it out on you. You’re his girl.

He hips sped up, this thrusts got harder and your legs would have given out if his hips weren’t keeping you in place. Fucking his anger into you, and yours out of you.

He pulled your leash up and forced you to your feet, your back flush against his chest as she kept fucking you, going and going and fucking going, you couldn’t barley think- let alone stand. Fucking you like a rag doll was all he planned on doing.

His hand went to your front, and began to play with your clit, rolling it under his finger, making you dizzy, you moans increasing and you felt yourself tremble. You were about to cum, he knew it.

You always came first, that wouldn’t change, even if you were mean, and he was angry, he was going to take care of his girl, let her cum all she wants.

And you did, you came around him and squeezed his cock like it was a lifeline. Her pussy fluttering around him.

But he wouldn’t stop until he was finished too. Your body was pushed back onto the bed, the black whip disintegrating as he took his own hands and used them to restrain you instead. He pushed his hips deep into yours in slow yet aggressive thrusts. He was going to cum, fill you, he was going to teach you just what your place was and to never forget it.

“Fuck..! Fuck!”

And two deep thrusts was all he had left before he burst with thick ropes of cum into your pussy. Your tummy being filled with warmth and your eyes tilting into your head as they closed in exhaustion.

He stilled and let him empty itself before smiling so sweetly at you.

“Does my baby feel better..?”

He asked, just as sweetly as he always has. Maybe you’d learn something this time around.

“M..hm.”

He mumbled into your ear as he settled his chest against your back;

“Good.. don’t forget what ‘Zuku taught you today.. ‘Kay..?”

So patient and gentle.

(Don’t copy my stuff pookie, bitches with juicy pussy DONT copy works.. but you can still reblog… daddy appreciates those.)

[hayleythesugarbowl]

If you feel comfortable, could you do a cute little one shot about reader and Ian telling their smosh friends that they’re having a baby? Maybe they announce it in a jokey way and everyone’s like wait are u or are u not?? Thank you!! I love ur writing so much!! 😘

Try Not To Laugh: Crew Baby Edition || Ian Hecox x reader

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ masterlist • smosh masterlist  ⋆˚｡⋆୨୧⋆

summary: you announce your’s and ian’s pregnancy through a TNTL bit

word count: 1.2k

warnings: pregnancy, ian being ian and talking about milk

a/n: this is so cute wait 🤭. hope you enjoy this cute, short little fic!! the pic has nothing to do with this but i thought it was funny lol. fem!reader.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~°~❦~°~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  “Do you know where they keep the fake babies?” 

     You scoured the shelves, peeking out from backstage as you waited for your turn to go on for your bit.

      You weren’t exactly used to being on camera and you were still getting used to it. 

      You were participating in your first every Try Not To Laugh video, a gauntlet with all of the crew. 

      “Try the bin next to the walrus in a wig,” Ian pointed in the direction of said bin. 

      You began searching, crouching to get a better look, as you thought about what you were going to do when it was your turn.

      You and Ian had planned it all the week before, knowing exactly what you’d do when you’d first heard Smosh wanted you in a TNTL Crew video. 

      Ian came up behind you now, putting a hand on your back as he crouched to help you look. 

     You had been dating Ian for over a year now, shortly after you’d joined the Smosh crew. Now, everyone at the company had bets going on when you were going to get married and tie the knot or adopt a pet or get pregnant.

     And they weren’t far off. About the last part at least. You were currently three months pregnant with Ian’s baby.

     You two couldn’t be happier. You were counting down the days until the third member of your family was brought into this world.

     But the joy was only shared between you and Ian—none of the other Smosh cast or crew knew about it yet. You were waiting for the right moment to tell everyone. 

     And where better than TNTL.

     You’d talked to Ian about it and decided that instead of come up with a bit, you and Ian would use your turn to announce your pregnancy. 

      If that didn’t get them to spit their water out, you didn’t know what would.

      Sure, telling your friends that you were having a baby during a bit wasn’t exactly conventional. It was silly and unserious and perfectly Smosh. Some people announced their marriages on April Fool’s Day, others announced their pregnancy during a joke show.

      You smiled as you thought about it, finally finding a realistic-looking plastic baby underneath a spiky wig.

     “This’ll do,” you turned to Ian.

     “A poor substitute for the real thing,” Ian said, standing and grabbing your hand to pull you up with him.

     He placed a hand on your stomach and you laid your own hand atop his.

     “If our baby looked like this though, I’d be pretty creeped out.” You gestured to the doll in your hand.

     “Maybe if the baby inherits its looks from you” Ian teased. 

     You put your hands on your hips and Ian just laughed, leaning in to kiss you quickly.

     “Kidding.”

     Erin, who had just gotten done performing her bit, came backstage then. 

     She smiled at you. “You’re up. Should be pretty easy, though. They’re spitting like crazy today—no swallowers here.”

     Behind you, Ian chuckled. “Nice.”

     You smacked his arm. “You’re a child.”

     “Pretty sure that,” Ian pointed to the fake baby, “Is a child.”

     You rolled your eyes at him, putting the baby in between your legs, hiding it under the long dress you wore.

     “Ready?” Ian asked you.

     “I didn’t shove this baby up skirt for nothing,” you teased. 

     You walked out in front of the cast, six of them, all with water in their mouths already.

     Ian followed you.

     A couple of the cast members, seeing Ian in your bit, looked at each other in a way that said, Of course they’re doing a bit together, they can’t go three seconds apart from each other.

      You and Ian shared your own look, nodding at each other as you began your bit.

     “Wanna know the easiest way to get breast milk, free and legally?” Ian said, putting on an infomercial voice. “When you want that leche but you just can’t go to jail again?”

     This got a couple people immediately, Courtney and Anthony both spitting out their water.

     You let the baby drop out from between your legs.

     Keith spit out his water now, shouting, “It never gets old!”

     Now you and Ian both said. “Get pregnant!”

     Ian came to stand beside you. “I got my girlfriend pregnant, and now I never have to worry about where my milk’s coming from again. This doesn’t work with LaCroix, sorry Shayne.”

     Shayne lost it, laughing as he wiped the water from his mouth. 

     You stepped forward. “So get pregnant today. Call now, and with only four small payments a month, you can be pregnant too!”

     Ian added, speaking quickly, “Restrictions may apply. Does not include shipping and handling. Must be 18 years or older to order—so sorry Trevor, maybe next time.”

     Trevor spit, throwing up his arms in mock offense.

     “So what are you waiting for?” You continued. “Get pregnant, like me!”

     You and Ian ended in a cheesy pose and you looked up to find everyone spitting out their water. 

     “You guys are crazy!” Courtney shouted, clapping.

     “Ian, the breast milk again?” Anthony teased. 

     “I hate that baby,” Kieth said, laughing. “I hate it!”

     Ian looked to you. “Well, hopefully you hate the real thing a little less.”

     He grabbed your hand, and you linked your fingers with his. Ian leaned down and kissed your stomach. 

     Suddenly, Olivia, the last to laugh, spit out her water, a look of surprise on her face. 

     She gestured between you and Ian. “Wait are you guys serious?”

     Expressions of shock filled the room and everyone was momentarily silent. 

     “Guys!” Courtney shouted in anticipation. “Guys!”

     Shayne stood up, putting his hands behind his head. “No. No you guys are playing us.”

     “Wait,” Anthony looked between the two of you. “Wait are you—”

     You nodded to all of them. “We’re pregnant.”

     The room erupted into shouts of ‘oh my god!’ and ‘no way!’ and ‘wait they’re together?’—the last one was Trevor.

      It only lasted a moment before everyone was up and hugging you, congratulating you and Ian.

     “I can’t believe you guys just did that,” Anthony shook his head in disbelief. 

     You giggled. “We were waiting for the perfect moment—and I guess this was it.”

     “Well, congrats you guys,” Shayne said. 

     “You’re going to make such good parents,” Courtney nodded, turning their attention to Shayne. “And who knows, maybe we’re next.”

     Everyone laughed at the expression on Shayne’s face. 

     “Do you have any name ideas yet?” Olivia asked.

     “Not yet,” Ian said. “But I’m pulling for Ian Jr. if it’s a boy”

     “Maybe honey,” you said, patting Ian’s arm before turning to the others and shaking your head profusely.

     Kieth laughed. “So I guess Kieth is off the table?” 

     “Or Trevor?” Trevor put in. 

     “Or Olivia if it’s a girl?”

     “Well put those on the list,” you said. “Right after Ian Jr.”

     This got a laugh from everyone. You looked around at your friends at coworkers that surrounded you. You were glad everyone knew now, and could share in your happiness. 

     You grabbed Ian’s hand again, leaning into him. You had so much to look forward to together, and you couldn’t wait.

     “Can we rearrange the order?” You spun around to see Tommy peaking out from backstage, pretending to wipe a tear from under his eye. 

     “Because there’s no way I’m going after that.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~°~❦~°~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

ˋ°•*⁀➷ i always love writing for ian and i hope y’all enjoyed this. check out my other ian fics if you enjoyed this—i think i have 5 now. mwah! 🎀

[lllivia]

can i request?

pranking Jackie, that u got a hickey from someone else so you can get back at her after she pranked u :p

Happy April Fools Day!!

Jackie Taylor x f!reader

TYSM FOR THE REQUESTT, literally the perfect timing since its April 1st today 😭😭 (I completely forgot about this for MONTHS 💀)

summary: getting revenge on your girlfriend after last year's April Fools Day

warnings: modern au, infidelity prank, not proofread, slightly suggestive at the end

_

Wow maybe this is a little bit too far you can't help but think nervously as you look over yourself in the mirror, makeup brushes scattered across the sink counter.

As you pat your finger one last time over the now very convincing hickey the sense of guilt that was creeping up your throat quickly disappears when you recall the godawful prank your conniving little girlfriend pulled to deserve this.

_

Last April Fools Day you had come home exhausted from a long day at school with a strong need to shower. And you didn't really think much of it as you stepped under the hot stream, letting the water run over your hair and body.

you'd scrubbed off all the grime left from soccer practice before you lastly reached over to your shampoo bottle, eyes still closed as you felt your way over to it before squeezing a generous amount into your hand.

"WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK"

You yelled at your own reflection the second you stepped out of the shower and looked in the fogged up mirror where everything seemed to be normal - except your now bright pink hair.

"What the fuck what the fuck oh my god" you rambled frantically as you quickly searched the name of your girlfriend into your phone, immediately knowing that she was behind this.

"Jackie what did you do!" Is the first thing your raised voice said after she picked up the phone call, irritation bubbling up as she burst out laughing when your disgruntled face shows on her screen, her plan had clearly worked.

"Happy April fools day!!" She responded breathlessly, still not done laughing.

"This is not funny Jax - I look like a clown oh my god" you continued and looked up into the mirror again. Well it didn't actually look that bad - but still.

"Well then you'll be my sexy clown baby, you look hot, I have to say pink is definitely your color" Jackie giggled evilly back, way too smug for your liking as you continued glaring.

_

The dye hadn't washed out of your hair for like a month, and ever since then you had been planning what would be the best way to get back at Jackie.

Everything was ready, you had already set up for her to come over today to just watch a movie and hang out, so it would be perfect to 'accidentally' flash the self made bruise at her while you were cuddling or something.

Your phone suddenly pings.

'I'm standing outside 💕' - Jax 🐰⚽

You quickly cover the makeshift bruise on your neck before walking to the front door, a little bit anxious.

"Hi baby" your girlfriend grins and greets you as she steps inside, immediately making herself comfortable as she throws herself onto your large couch.

"Hi Jackie" you smile back, rubbing your clammy hands on your shorts before following her slightly on edge.

"I know I said we'd go to the arcade but I'm kinda tired today so can we please just watch a movie here?" you sit down next to her and pout, giving her your infamous puppy dog eyes.

"Yeah that's fine.. On one condition" she replies in a serious tone making you sweat even more.

"What?" Surely she hadn't figured out what you were doing yet right?

"You have to win me the biggest teddy they have the next time we go to the arcade" She answers smiling widely.

Pushing her playfully you can't help but roll your eyes lovingly. "yeahh yeah of course"

An hour goes by as you cuddle up together, enjoying each others presence as you watch some movie in the background. Deciding now was the time to finally get back at her, you shift a little, making the bruise more visible to where she was sitting.

Another few minutes go by before it's Jackie's turn to shift uncomfortably as she studies the mark clearly planted on your neck.

"What the fuck is that" she musters.

"Hm what?" You answer, hiding your tiny smirk as you look over at her.

"What the fuck is that bruise on your neck."

You brush your hair back over the mark, acting both confused and slightly defensive.

"I don't know what you're on about Jax" you shrug.

Her eyes blaze with anger as she forcefully grabs your face by the chin, turning your head to the side before studying your neck more closely.

"This is clearly a huge fucking hickey y/n, who was it?"

"No one- it's fine Jackie let's just finish the movie" you pull away.

She stands up.

"I'm leaving, this is such bullshit - I thought we were doing good - perfect even. And then you have to go make out with some whore" she says harshly, blinking away the tears that had slowly crept up on her before storming towards the front door.

Shit that had gone way worse than you were expecting - you weren't even sure what you were expecting from this.

"Jackie wait! Shit" you stumble over your own legs as you rush after your furious girlfriend. "It was a prank! I'm pranking you ok, I just wanted to get back at you for last year"

Just as she was about to turn the handle you catch up with her "I promise, see?" You carefully turn her face towards you again.

"What."

You reach up and rub your hand over your neck forcefully. Turning it red with not only with the bloodflow rushing up towards the friction but also the eyeshadow getting smudged all over.

"It's makeup, it was all fake baby. It was just an April Fools prank - a really really stupid one at that"

You say hastily and caress the girls cheek softly, soothing her.

She looks away again, blinking a couple of more times to process before smiling slightly. "..I guess you got me this time" but then she swats your hand away from her and comes dangerously close. "But if you ever EVER do something like this again, I will kick your ass."

You chuckle "mkay if you say so" then grimace "how about we go out, I feel like I kinda owe you"

She purses her lips for a second before looking you over. "Or- we could stay right here, and I could show you what real hickeys look like"

You scoff smirking "how could I say no to that"

[marigoldenblooms]

April Foolishness - Headcanons

Pairing (Not all at once): Wanda Maximoff x Fem!Reader, Natasha Romanoff x Fem!Reader, Yelena Belova x Fem!Reader, Kate Bishop x Fem!Reader

MINORS DNI - 18+

Summary: How would they react to you failing miserably- masterfully pranking them at every turn?

Tags: Fluff, established relationships, swearing, attempted pranking (mentions of bugs/arachnids, fish), innuendos and tension, comfort, light power usage, no actual smut (fade to black).

A/N: Happy silly day, ya'll!! I wanted to do something fun between classes, so this is it- april fools pranks on my favorite girls. Not proofread at all. Enjoy the boops!

Images are not mine, credit to owners! ~~~

Wanda x Reader

You hadn't been dating Wanda for very long.

Well, if you don't count the years of pining, that is.

You had hidden yourself behind a corner in her hallway, arms out and ready to spook.

This had been your same trick from Halloween (which between that and the turnips did not go well-)

But this time it’d go swimmingly.

After thirty minutes later, you heard the familiar clack of her heels against the compound’s floors, and…

Nothing. Silence.

You peeked around the corner to see where the witch had gone, and-

“Boo.”

Her warm grasp hugged your middle , yet you swear you jumped out of your skin.

“What the- Fuck, Wands-“ Your terror was met with her musical laughter, patting the the sides of your stomach.

“Well if you insist, sweetheart.”

Her voice echoed

She’d let go of you, and you could see the sparkling mirth in her eyes once you turned around.

She placed a quick peck on your cheek, looping your hand with hers to play with your fingers, gaze downcast at them even as her mischievous words would enter your head without her mouth moving.

“If you want to spook a mind reader, darling..”

You gulped as her touch grew more bold, pinning you against the wall- face warming as she’d tilt her head,

“You’ll have to do better than that.”

She’d chuckle at your flustered reaction, her grin cheshire as she’d lead you back to her room, giddy with sweet excitement.

“And happy April fools to you too, Wan-“

~~~ Natasha x Reader

Natasha had always managed to prank you first before you could prank her.

One year prior, you’d ended up with an egg in your hair while your whipped-cream pie prank had gone unsung.

And that was some really good whipped cream.

This year, though- you had buttered her up. Perks of being her partner- the pranks could go even harder.

“Good morning, my dearest sunshine-“ You’d murmur, settling her in with breakfast in bed.

Your trick? Salt in her coffee instead of sugar. Genius.

Natasha propped herself up on her arms, giving you an upturned eyebrow, “Oh, and what’s the occasion?”

“Oh, nothing much..” A shit eating grin plastered her face, one that would soon be returned by the redhead.

“Birthday? Anniversary..?” She’d poke at your side as you sat down, her touch ticklish as she helped you settle the tray of food on her bedsheets.

“M-mmn, nothin’, sugar..” Oh, how you’d be eating those words soon enough.

You’d watch as she’d take a sip from her coffee, eyes wide and sparkling as she opened her mouth-

And sighed in bliss.

What the fuck was wrong with this woman.

“Delicious, baby..” Natasha purred, taking another hardy swig, and you watched as she swallowed. “You’ve outdone yourself..”

“I…uh-“ Your babbling words would be cut short as you took a drink of your own mug-

And was met with intense, uncomfortable sodium.

She cackled as you spit your mouthful back into your cup, punching her jokingly with a red face, “You- you fuckin’-“

“Switched them?”

“Not just the brew-“ Your hand would’ve found your forehead in shock, “But the mugs too- how the shit did you do that?”

“A spy will never reveal her secrets-“ She’d lean up to kiss you, but instead would shift the platter over to the side. “And you need to wash your mouth out.”

“Not before I drink my coffee..” You’d hiss, chugging her now lukewarm mug down.

That was, until you saw a plastic totally real cockroach on the bottom of the mug, shrieking before chucking it against the wall.

“Love you too, dear.”

~~~ Yelena x Reader

You didn’t think Yelena could be scared of anything.

She threw a knife at the fake spider you pranked her with last year.

And she spat in the face of the ‘piranhas’ that had infested your room’s bathroom two years ago.

And even so, you tried again this year- although with something much less terrifying.

You'd flooded Yelena's room with multicolored balloons, painstakingly blowing them up before gently setting them on her floor.

And the best part?

She was asleep in her bed the whole time.

You had almost finished the second bag of balloons when Fanny, ever the sleepy Akita, finally stirred from their rest.

The pup locked eyes with you, and you were so thankful that they didn't bark.

That didn't stop Yelena from waking, though.

The blond would rise quickly, eyes darting around as soon as her dog moved an inch. You swear she had murder in her eyes, although that might've just been from awakening so quickly.

It all left her once she found you, though.

Groggily, she'd wipe at her eyes, mumbling something before kicking her foot off the bed to stand-

Bumping into a stray balloon.

She recoiled immediately, yowling as though she'd been pained deeply- and you were at her side in a heartbeat.

"Yelena, shit- you okay?"

"Yeah.." She'd gruff, her shoulders slacking once your hands found purchase on them. She'd hide her head in your shoulder, a surprising gesture.

You wrapped your arms around her, rubbing soothing circles into her back, "No need to be frightened, honey.." She'd hold you closer, and a flicker of thought ran through your mind, "Lena..are you scared?"

"What-? No-" She'd deny, her voice especially thick this early in the morn. "You just startled me-"

"That's a form of fear, hun-" Your chuckle was met with a groan from her, before she pulled her blankets back over the two of you.

Her words were muffled, "Fine, you got me- but now you hold me until I say so."

"My big, bad, scary Lena...of course, honey."

~~~ Kate x Reader

No matter what you pranked Kate with, she was always worried about you.

It's not unfounded, after you fell down the stairs during last year's April Fools, but still.

This time, you’d actually get her.

"Kate, made you some brownies!"

You heard her clamor with a fevrency that made her sound like a one man band.

She burst out of the hallway, expression wild with hunger and apprehension-

Until she saw you holding some kiddy scissors exceptionally sharp blades of murder and death and terror and-

“Babe!” She’d screech, barreling forth to snatch the scissors from your careful hands, placing them gently on the counter, before inspecting your palm for even the slightest scratch.

She hadn’t even noticed the brown construction paper, or the cut letter you’d pressed towards her middle.

“Kate, earth to Kate-“ Your smile towards her shook her from her thoughts, “I’m okay, pretty girl..Happy April Fools!”

Between the panic and the praise, her brain had to do a soft restart after that.

After a few more seconds, her goofy grin would return again, almost coy, “Gave me a heart attack there, you know-“

“I know,” You’d motion to the tin of hello kitty bandaids you’d raided from Tony, “And I was prepared, you doofus.”

She’d smile, nodding along until her face flushed- her hand rubbing smooth circles into your hip.

“But if you, you know- wanted to do some scissoring, as they say-“ You’d sigh, shaking your head with a teasing lilt, “You’re verryy smooth, dear.”

You’d press a boop to her nose, a teasing whisper, “I’ll think about it.”

~~~

[thankskenpenders]

It's a bit late, but I figure I have to touch on the big news from today, which is that for an (early) April Fools celebration Sega went and released a free visual novel about Sonic getting murdered

Here's a thing you should know about me: I am deathly allergic to ironic visual novels, and the related trend of announcing dating sims (which are synonymous with the medium of visual novels as a whole to many people) on April Fools

Aside from an incredibly small selection of titles that have seen wider success, it feels like much of the game industry is only willing to acknowledge visual novels as a punchline. And said jokes about dating sim stereotypes have been done a million fucking times by now. They're parodies of parodies of parodies. Even when these prank dating sims actually go and get made rather than just being a few fake screenshots, it feels like it's just because VNs are seen as cheap, disposable entertainment compared to "real" games. Companies can afford to commission some bullshit like the KFC dating sim and write it off as a marketing stunt. And it works. These games will get widely reported on for being so ~wacky~, while devs pouring their hearts into doing sincere, interesting work with the medium of visual novels are usually out of fucking luck. It's so, so tiring. The fact that this happens like clockwork every year has made me come to dread April Fools Day

So imagine my surprise when The Murder of Sonic the Hedgehog drops out of nowhere and it's actually one of my favorite Sonic games in years

Aside from the intentionally tongue-in-cheek, attention-grabbing title (and Sonic doing the Family Guy Death Pose), there isn't an ounce of irony here. It's just a straight up whodunnit VN set on a train, albeit a lighthearted and pretty easy one. It's still a Sonic game, after all, and Sonic games are for kids. But it's so clearly made out of a place of love, both for the characters and for murder mysteries, rather than being a parody that's constantly winking at the camera and going "haha, isn't this absurd that this even exists at all?" Forget that. This wants to tell a genuinely good little Sonic story. Not to mention how gorgeous all of the artwork is throughout, with character illustrations from IDW cover artist Min Ho Kim (AKA deegeemin)

Like, for real. I've wanted the Sonic games to explore the supporting cast more for years, and I can't believe the game to finally do it is a murder mystery visual novel released for April Fools. This might be one of the best showcases of the cast... ever, in the games? The script from Ian Mutchler is so, so great, with fun and cute moments for everyone involved. And, smartly, you see the cast through the eyes of a new character (I named them "Blorbo") who isn't necessarily familiar with things like Blaze being a princess from another dimension, making this a surprisingly valid way to introduce people to the supporting cast. I'd say more, but it's a short game, so I think everyone should just go out and play it if you haven't already

There is still part of me that wishes a Sonic visual novel like this could've been greenlit for release any other day of the year, rather than being yet another April Fools visual novel. But regardless of the excuse they used to make it, I'm extremely happy that this exists