#jules livvy and ty make pancakes

[emjenenla]

I walk a lonely road, the only one that I have ever known [A Dark Artifices Fanfic]

(Don't know where it goes, but it's only me, and I walk alone.) When she learned her brother’s secrets, Livvy made herself a promise; she wasn’t going to let Julian do everything on his own anymore. Or that LoS AU where no one dies, but things are still messed up anyway.

Title: I walk a lonely road the only one that I have ever known

Author: Emjen Enla (Fanfiction)/emjenenla (Tumblr)

Teaser: (Don't know where it goes, but it's only me, and I walk alone.) When she learned her brother’s secrets, Livvy made herself a promise; she wasn’t going to let Julian do everything on his own anymore. Or that LoS AU where no one dies, but things are still messed up anyway.

Rating: PG-13/T

Canon/Timeline: Bookverse AU; set after Lord of Shadows sans all the major deaths

Dominant Characters: Livia Blackthorn, Julian Blackthorn, Tiberius Blackthorn, appearances by Drusilla Blackthorn, Kit Herondale, Octavian Blackthorn, Paige Ashdown, Mrs. Ashdown (who I named), mentions of Emma Carstairs, Mark Blackthorn, Cristina Rosales, Keiran, Helen Blackthorn, Aline Penhallow, Arthur Blackthorn, and others.

Pairings: Blackstairs (Emma/Julian), implications of Kitty (Kit/Ty), Mark/Cristina/Kieran and Helen/Aline

Warnings: honestly, I’m not sure if there’s much of anything. Angst, I guess.

Disclaimer: I don’t own the Shadowhunters universe or the song “Boulevard of Broken Dreams” by Green Day.

--

When Livia Blackthorn learned that everything she thought was being taken care of by her Uncle Arthur was actually taken care of by her older brother, Julian, she made herself one promise:

No more.

No more would Julian be left to take care of everything all on his own while his siblings lived the carefree lives of dumb kids. Livvy would be right there with him, helping as much as she possibly could.

She carried this promise etched into her soul as the Blackthorn siblings returned to LA where Uncle Arthur and their secrets awaited them, safe from the meddling of Zara Dearborn. Helen and Aline were re-banished to Wrangel Island, which meant that things were basically back to normal. Livvy tried to ignore how almost pathetically relieved Julian was.

Perhaps it was best if he was relieved instead of anything else, because things were only going mosty back to normal. The biggest difference was that Emma wasn’t returning to LA, and in Livvy and Ty’s opinions there was not a good explanation for why. Emma said that she was going to go on a tour of the different Institutes, but she wasn’t eighteen yet. Not to mention, when Shadowhunters went on their tours, they usually went with their parabatai. Emma was not taking Jules, she was taking Cristina, Mark and (though no one outright stated it) Kieran. It wasn’t right. When Ty had pointed this out to Jules he had just told him to leave it.

All this meant that not only were they back to their pre-return of Mark days, and Jules didn’t even have Emma to keep him grounded. Livvy was determined to pick up as much of the slack as she could.

The trouble lay in attempting to redraw the caretaker/cared-for lines that Julian had drawn after the deaths of their parents.

They had been back at the Institute for a couple days the morning that Livvy woke rather early to get a shower in before everyone else was up (at least in theory because she heard Ty and Kit talking quietly when she walked by Kit’s room to get a towel). While she showered she contemplated her game plan for the day. Firstly, would be to check in on how Tavvy was feeling. Dru and Tavvy had come down with the flu directly after returning to the Institute. Perhaps that wasn’t really surprising, Ty had said something about none of them having much immune system since they all pretty much hung out with each other and no one else. Everyone else seemed to be feeling fine, though, so far at least.

She climbed out of the shower and dressed before leaving her room. She ran across Dru on the way back to her room. The younger girl was looking slightly annoyed.

“What’s wrong?” Livvy asked.

“Tavvy was crying all night,” Dru grumbled. “It was so annoying.”

“He was crying?” Livvy asked. “Why didn’t you wake me? You can’t just let him cry!”

Dru’s face took on a look of afront. “For the record, I didn’t just ‘let him cry;’ I woke Jules.”

Of course, she had. Old habits die hard. “Dru…” Livvy groaned. “I thought we’d agreed not to bother Jules so much anymore.”

“You would have had to wake him anyway!” Dru argued, hands fisted on her hips. “Tavvy was really upset and only Jules can calm him down when he’s like that!”

Livvy wanted to keep arguing, but she really couldn’t. She’d asked Dru to start coming to her for stuff she normally would have gone to Julian for, but she hadn’t told her little sister about Uncle Arthur and who was really running the Institute. Livvy had wanted to, but she figured Dru had enough to deal with without having to handle all that stuff. The problem was that meant that Dru had no idea exactly how much Jules already had on his plate and didn’t see what was wrong with piling on one more little thing.

Not to mention, Dru probably had a point about Livvy not being able to calm Tavvy down…

“Where’s Jules now?” she asked instead of saying something she might regret.

Dru shrugged. “I dunno. I was trying to sleep,” and headed for the bathroom.

“Okay,” Livvy said, then remembered what she should have asked at the beginning of the conversation. “How are you feeling?”

“Much better,” Dru said. “I’m going to shower now.” and she was gone.

Livvy winced. This parent stuff was much harder than Julian made it look.

She crossed the hall and peaked into Tavvy’s room. The little boy was curled up in his blankets, fast asleep. Jules was nowhere in sight. She checked his room in the hopes that maybe he’d just gone back to bed, but that was empty too, though she was starting to realize that of course that was too much to hope for. She headed down the stairs towards the next most likely place to her find her big brother at this time of day: the kitchen.

As expected, Julian was there getting things ready to make breakfast. Livvy paused in the doorway for a moment to study him. He was moving slowly, and his shoulders were slumped. He looked tired. Livvy wondered if she’d have noticed that even a month ago and had to admit that she probably wouldn’t have.

“You know you didn’t have to stay up all night with Tavvy,” she said. “I could have done it.”

Jules jumped and whirled to face her. His face looked even more tired than his body language did. “Livvy!” he gasped. “How long have you been standing there?”

“Just a minute,” Livvy assured him.

“Do you need something?” Julian asked. She couldn’t tell if he’d forgotten what she’d said about Tavvy or if he was ignoring it. She wondered if the latter was something Jules would actually do. It didn’t seem like him, but she was realizing there were a lot of things Jules would do that she wouldn’t have expected.

“Dru said Tavvy was crying all night,” she said. “You didn’t need to stay up with him; I could have done that.”

“You couldn’t have calmed him down, Livs,” Jules said, not condescending, just stating the truth. “Not like he was last night.”

Livvy was a little insulted. Just because Julian wasn’t deliberately trying to put her down didn’t mean that he wasn’t inadvertently managing it. “Then at least go lie down now,” she half-snapped. “I can make breakfast.”

“It’s pancake day,” Julian said, raising an eyebrow.

Livvy felt her face fall. They made pancakes from scratch because Ty didn’t like the taste of the ones made from boxed mix. Livvy might have managed making boxed pancakes, but the homemade ones were something only Jules could do.

Jules turned back to the counter, no doubt assuming he’d gotten rid of her. Frustration boiled in Livvy’s stomach. Why couldn’t Julian realize that things were going to be different now that she and Ty knew the truth? Why did he seem to think that everything was going to go right back to the way it had been? Why did he think that Livvy would be content to let him care for her now that she knew he needed help? Why did he seem to think that her attempts to help would be easy to brush aside?

“Teach me then,” she said with perhaps a bit more force than would usually be used when asking to be taught to make pancakes.

Julian paused and looked back at her. “What?”

“Teach me how to make pancakes,” Livvy said as clearly as possible. “Then next time I can make them myself and you can rest. It doesn’t make sense for just one of us to know how to cook anyway.”

Jules stared at her, his face slightly slack with surprise. “You really want to learn?”

“Do you not want to teach me?” Livvy asked, putting her hands on her hips. She figured that if he wanted to argue he would back down in the face of such an accusation.

“I’ll teach you,” Jules said. “I’m just surprised. You’ve never mentioned wanting to learn to cook before.”

That’s because I didn’t realize that every single adult thing in this place was done by my seventeen-year-old brother before. Livvy thought, but what she said was, “Well, it’s time I learned.”

“Okay,” Julian raised a hand and bit on the corner of one of his nails. Livvy noticed blood welling up as he ripped part of the nail away from the quick. Her chest tightened. She’d always known Jules bit his nails (it was impossible to miss), but she’d never really noticed it before, and never really thought about how painful it must be.

“You should wash your hands,” Julian said, then he looked down and realized he was bleeding. “And I probably should too.”

So, they washed their hands. Livvy pretended not to notice Julian wince when soapy water got into the tiny wounds on his fingers. She wanted to say something but wasn’t sure what.

“Alright,” Jules said, oblivious to her dilemma. He crossed back to the counter, wrapping his still-bleeding finger in a napkin. “First we start with the dry ingredients.”

Jules helped her measure the dry ingredients and then the wet ones. Neither of them said anything that wasn’t related to pancakes until they were beginning to ladle the batter into the skillet.

“You know,” Livvy said, deciding it was time to reopen the previous conversation. “There’s really no reason why I couldn’t calm Tavvy when he cries. After all, you’re Tavvy’s brother not his dad, and I’m his sister.”

Julian paused and stood there a moment, his hands braced on the countertop, shoulders hunched, staring down at the granite.

“Jules?” Livvy asked after the silence had dragged on long enough to be uncomfortable.

The silence went on for a while longer, before Julian shifted and reached for the spatula without looking at her.

“Tavvy doesn’t remember Mom and Dad,” he said.

“What?” Livvy wasn’t sure she’d heard correctly. “What do you mean, he doesn’t remember them?”

“It’s not really that surprising,” Julian said flipping one of the pancakes to reveal a perfectly cooked, golden side. “He was basically a newborn when Mom died, and he was so little during the war.”

Jules sighed and drummed the handle of the spatula against the counter, staring up at the ceiling. “People are always saying that I’m Tavvy’s brother not his father, but they never seem to realize that I was the one who changed his diapers and bathed him and read him stories and cleaned his scraped knees. I’m the one he screams for when he wakes up in the middle of the night convinced the monsters are going to come back and get him too.”

Julian sighed and looked back down at the counter. “My relationship with Tavvy is different than my relationships with you, Ty and Dru. I do all sorts of parent stuff for you three, but you all remember Mom and Dad and know that this family dynamic is abnormal. I don’t think Tavvy does. To Tavvy, this is normal; this is how family is supposed to work,” he paused and brought his thumb up to his mouth, gripping the stubby nail between his teeth. “When Tavvy’s says ‘Jules,’ he’s literally saying ‘Daddy.’”

Livvy just stared at him. Every time she thought she’d finally grasped exactly how messed up her family was, she was bombarded with more. How much longer would this go on?

They lapsed into silence until footsteps sounded in the hall and came to a stop in the kitchen doorway.

“What are you doing?” Ty asked.

Livvy latched onto the distraction like a life raft. “Jules is teaching me to make pancakes,” she said turning to face her twin.

Ty’s face lit up. “Cool! Can I flip some, Jules?”

Julian’s face creased in a gentle smile that Livvy had always thought of as a big brother’s smile, but she now realized was probably actually a parent’s smile. “Sure,” he said. “Come over here, Ty.”

Livvy stood back and used the time Julian’s attention was focused on Ty to think of something to say.

“Jules,” she said after several minutes. “Maybe we should tell the Clave about Uncle Arthur.”

Julian’s shoulders tensed, but he didn’t look at her. “We can’t do that, Livs.”

“Why can’t we?” Ty asked, his gaze focused on the pancakes. “If the Clave puts someone else in charge, then you won’t have to do so much.”

“That would only make our situation worse,” Julian said.

“How could that possible make our situation worse?” Livvy asked, able to hear the growing frustration in her voice.

“The only reason we’re allowed to live here together is because the Clave is under the impression that Arthur is in charge and raising us,” Julian said, he still wouldn’t look at either of them. “If they figure out that he hasn’t been, they’ll take the Institute away from him and split us up.”

“Why would they do that?” Ty asked, flipping a pancake very precisely out of the pan and onto a serving plate.

“If no one wanted us after the Dark War, there’s no reason to think anyone would want us now,” Julian said, he sounded bitter.

“What about Great-Aunt Marjorie?” Ty asked, which showed exactly how desperate he was; he hated Great-Aunt Marjorie.

“She likes it when we visit every once and awhile, so she can pretend to be a doting aunt,” Julian said. “She doesn’t want us living with her.” He went to ladle more batter into the pan, but Livvy took the measuring cup from him and did it herself.

“That’s really frustrating,” she said. “It’s not like she’d need to do much for us.”

“It doesn’t matter,” Jules said. He gone to sit down at the table and it looked like he was fighting the urge to put his head down on the tabletop. For the first time, Livvy noticed that he was a bit too pale on top of the tiredness.

“But we can’t keep this up forever,” she said. “Someone’s going to find out eventually.”

“She’s right,” Ty said. “Now that Malcom can’t make that potion, it’s only a matter of time before someone needs to see Uncle Arthur and we can’t provide him.”

“We don’t have to hold out forever,” Julian said. He didn’t look up, though he might have been studying the grain of the table. “Just until next year.”

“What happens next year?” Ty asked.

“I turn eighteen,” Jules said. “Once that happens I’ll be able to formally apply to become head of the Institute. The Clave gave Clary and Jace the New York Institute at nineteen, and I’m sure I can make a convincing case. Then I can openly run this place and become you four’s official guardian.”

Livvy imagined most seventeen-year-olds would sound excited at the idea of being head of an Institute, but Jules just sounded resigned and exhausted.

“Are you okay, Jules?” she asked.

“Yeah,” he said, watching vacantly as Ty flipped the pancakes.

“You’re sure?”

“Just tired,” Jules said. He rubbed his eyes and then pinched the bridge of his nose. “And I think I might be coming down with Tavvy and Dru’s flu.”

“Do you need to lie down?” Livvy asked even though she was pretty sure Jules wouldn’t admit to needing to rest even if he did.

“It’s really just a headache,” Julian said, meeting expectations. “I’m fine.”

“Jules…” Livvy said trying to figure out what to say to have the right affect.

“I’ll take a nap after breakfast,” Jules said with a small smile meant to comfort her. “Which reminds me; I’d better go make sure Dru and Tavvy are up. Where’s Kit, Ty?”

“Shower,” Ty said, studying Julian out of the corners of his eyes.

“Alright,” Jules said. “I’ll be back, then.” He heaved himself to his feet and left the room.

Livvy and Ty watched him go. “He’s not okay, is he?” Ty asked.

“If he’s getting that flu he won’t be in a couple hours,” Livvy said.

Ty nodded, biting his lip, but didn’t say anything.

~~~~

They had finished making the last of pancakes by the time Julian came back with Dru and Tavvy. Kit trailed in after a couple minutes, no doubt not wanting to seem like he was coming to breakfast when he was told. Sometimes Livvy found his attitude a little tiring, and she could only imagine how Jules felt about it because all his attempts at being caretaker rubbed all Kit’s authority issues the wrong way.

They all settled down at the table and dug into their food. They were part way through their breakfast when the doorbell rang. Jules, who’d been picking at his food and looking vaguely nauseous, lifted his head, eyes wide.

“Who’s that?” Dru asked.

“Can’t be anything good,” Livvy said. “Is there anyone we would actually like to see who would ring the bell?”

“No one who’s likely to show up anytime soon,” Julian said pushing his chair back from the table. “It’s probably someone here for Arthur.”

“Should I go get him?” Dru asked, so earnest and completely blind to the real situation.

“No, you, Tavvy and Kit finish eating,” Jules levered himself slowly to his feet and massaged his temples. “Livvy, Ty, can you come with me for a minute?”

Livvy and Ty followed him out into the hall. Julian didn’t say anything until they were out of earshot of the kitchen, then he stopped and turned back to them, “Can you two go up and wait by the attic stairs?” he asked. “I don’t think Uncle Arthur will come down--he never has before--but he’s been in a weird mood since the Cohort was here. Can you two just make sure he stays upstairs where he can’t contradict anything I say?”

“Sure,” Ty said.

“Good,” Julian said. His face had lost a lot of its color and he was actually looking sick. Dru and Tavvy hadn’t declined this fast and Livvy wondered if Jules had lied about how long he’d been feeling bad when they’d talked about it earlier. The thought that he might lie about something like that hurt, but she no longer thought it was something he wouldn’t do.

“What are you going to do?” Livvy asked.

“I’ll tell them that Arthur Blackthorn is out on business or something,” Julian said, he sounded so shockingly casual about the idea that Livvy couldn’t quite wrap her mind around it. “Then I’ll hope that whatever they need done ‘Arthur Blackthorn’ can do by mail,” he made air quotes when he said, “Arthur Blackthorn.” Then the bell rang again, and he hurried off towards the door without another word.

Livvy and Ty stood side by side for a moment. “Can you handle Uncle Arthur alone?” she asked.

He nodded. “Sure, go with Jules.”

Livvy nodded and darted off down the hall. She caught up with her older brother just as he reached the front door. Julian looked at her in surprise. “Ty’s keeping an eye on Uncle Arthur,” she said before he could speak.

He nodded and opened the door just as the bell rang again.

Linnett Ashdown was standing on the porch with her daughter, Paige. Mrs. Ashdown gave them a friendly smile, but Paige looked like she was judging them. Livvy was suddenly acutely aware that she was wearing a tee-shirt with Captain America’s shield on it, even though Shadowhunters weren’t supposed to know who that was, and Jules was wearing an old navy-blue hoodie that looked like it probably needed to be washed. Livvy clenched her fists and her teeth. She’d never really like Paige Ashdown, but after her horrible prank on Ty, Livvy hated her.

“Hello,” Julian said with a friendly smile. If he was thinking about how Paige had treated Ty, there was no way to see it on his face. “What can we do for you?”

“I’d like to speak to Arthur,” Mrs. Ashdown said. “I know it’s early, but Francis and I have patrol later and I wanted to get this done first. Is your uncle available?”

Livvy’s stomach clenched even though the list reasons someone could be here that didn’t involve Uncle Arthur were slim. Julian’s pale face morphed into the perfect expression of guiltless apology. “He’s out of town right now on Clave business,” he said. “Is there something we could help you with instead?”

“I’m afraid not,” Mrs. Ashdown said with a kind smile, she was so different from Paige who looked like the news of Uncle Arthur’s “business” was a personal slight. “I wanted to ask Arthur if Paige could shadow him in his work running the Institute. She’s interested in the management side of Shadowhunter life and we thought that Arthur might be able to help her get some experience.

That was something that Julian couldn’t do. If Paige came to in the Institute, there would be no way to hide Uncle Arthur’s condition from her. The Clave would find out.

She glanced at Jules. He was chalky pale aside from a splotch of red on each cheek. Fever. He had definitely been sicker than “just a headache” when they’d been cooking earlier. He coughed into the sleeve of his hoodie before he replied.

“I’m not sure how Uncle Arthur will feel about that,” he said. Perhaps his smile was slightly strained but Livvy didn’t think either of the Ashdowns would notice. “He’s very particular about how things are run. He doesn’t even let us watch him work most of the time. I’ll ask him, though, maybe he’ll change his mind.”

Paige sniffed and opened her mouth as if she meant to say something, but Mrs. Ashdown stopped her with a hand on her arm. “It would be great if you could ask him, Julian,” she said. “When will he be home?”

“Tomorrow, maybe the day after depending on how things go,” Julian said so smoothly that Livvy almost didn’t believe he was lying. “I’ll be sure to ask him as soon as he gets back.”

“Oh, don’t rush him,” Mrs. Ashdown said. “Tell him to get back to us whenever is convenient.”

“Okay,” Julian said. “Thank you, Mrs. Ashdown.”

“You’re welcome,” she said then reached out and lay a hand on Julian’s cheek. Julian stiffened visibly. “You’re running a temperature,” Mrs. Ashdown told him. “You should rest. Do you have someone here watching you all?”

“Our tutor, Diana,” Julian said. Another lie. Diana was off wherever she was when she wasn’t with them, but Mrs. Ashdown didn’t know that.

“Alright,” she said with a gentle smile. “Tell her that I said you should take it easy today.”

“I’m fine,” Julian said.

“Don’t be stubborn,” she said with a smile. “Go to bed and we’ll stop darkening your doorstep.”

The Ashdowns said their goodbyes and left. Julian closed the door and leaned against it, his head thrown back, breathing quietly through parted lips. He looked exhausted. Livvy took his arm, Mrs. Ashdown was right about the fever; she could feel his heat through his shirt sleeve. “Come on, Jules. Why don’t you take that nap now?”

Julian’s eyelids were fluttering closed and he looked like he was seconds away from sinking to the floor. “I need to clean up the kitchen.”

Livvy adjusted her grip on his arm and coaxed him into a fully standing position. “The rest of us can handle that. You should rest before you pass out.”

Julian sighed but let her lead him up the Institute’s stairs. When they reached the floor with their bedrooms they met Ty coming back from the attic. “Are they gone?” he asked. “Who was there. What did they want?”

“Ashdowns,” Julian was rubbing at his temples again. “They want Paige to shadow Uncle Arthur.”

“She can’t do that,” Ty said. “She’ll find out.”

“I know,” Jules said. “Don’t worry about it. I’ll handle it.” He coughed into the crook of his elbow again. Livvy felt him sway and tightened her grip on his arm.

“Jules is going to lie down for a while,” she told Ty. “When everyone’s done with breakfast can you start on the dishes? Make Kit, Dru and Tavs help you. I’ll be down in a couple minutes.”

“Okay,” Ty said and headed for the stairs.

Livvy helped Julian to his bedroom and found a pair of pajama pants for him. She didn’t bother trying to convince him to take the hoodie off because he was shivering like he was cold even though he quite obviously wasn’t.

After he’d changed, Jules sunk down onto his bed. For once his face showed exactly what he was feeling, and he looked so incredibly thankful to lie down it brought tears to Livvy’s eyes. She looked away before he could notice and found herself looking at the mural he’d painted on the wall. She’d looked at it hundreds of times before, but she’d never noticed how sad it was. She turned pointedly away; she did not need to learn even more painful information about her older brother, at least not right now.

She pulled the blankets over Julian only to realize that he was watching her with a slightly perplexed look. “What?” she asked.

“Why are you suddenly so into the idea of helping me take care of everyone?” he asked. “It used to be like pulling teeth to get you to even keep an eye on Tavvy for an hour or two.”

Livvy felt her face heat up. She was ashamed of all the times she’d complained about something Julian had asked her to do, now that she realized that all she’d been doing was piling more work onto her overworked older brother.

“I know what’s actually going on now,” she said trying to sound as grown-up as possible. “It seems wrong to just let you do everything now that you don’t actually have to hide anything from me anymore. Besides, you don’t even have Emma anymore; you can’t be completely alone.”

Julian’s face tightened into a complicated expression that Livvy couldn’t define. “Yeah,” he said.

“Why did she leave?” Livvy asked. “You two are parabatai, you’re supposed to go on tour together. Why didn’t she wait until you were both eighteen? I know it wasn’t because of her break-up Mark, because he went with her.”

Julian sighed. He wasn’t looking at her, but that strange expression was still on his face. “It wouldn’t matter how long she waited,” he said. “I wouldn’t be able to go. I have an Institute to run and I will for probably the next thirty or forty years.” He really, really didn’t sound enthusiastic at the idea of running the Institute. Livvy wondered what he would rather do instead.

“So that’s why she went gallivanting around the world with Cristina, Mark and Kieran and left you here to hold down the fort?” Livvy asked. She didn’t want to be mad at Emma, but she found that thought filled her with some resentment anyway.

“Not…” Julian pulled a face. “Entirely.”

“Then why else?” Livvy asked.

Julian fiddled with the edge of one of blankets, chewing on the fingers of the other hand. He was obviously debating something. How much of the truth to tell her, probably. She knew he was contemplating telling the truth, because if he was lying he wouldn’t have spent so much time planning what he was going to say. Jules lied effortlessly.

Just when Livvy was beginning to think that he wasn’t going to say anything at all, he cleared his throat and said, “Emma and I…” he took a sharp breath and then mumbled so quietly that she could barely hear him. “Emma and I love each other.”

Livvy wasn’t sure why that was something to get so worked up about. “Of course, you do,” she said. “You’re parabatai.”

“Not like that,” Jules was still staring fixedly at the blanket. He would not even glance at her. “Emma and I are in love with each other.”

It took a second to sink in. “Oh,” Livvy said. Everything she’d ever assumed about Jules and Emma’s relationship reordered itself in her mind. They had always been close, even for parabatai, and Jules had never liked Emma’s boyfriends, even the nice ones. Even when Livvy had thought about setting Jules up with Cristina, the match hadn’t felt quite right. Now she realized that it was because on some level, she’d known that Emma was the perfect girl for Jules. “Oh,” she repeated.

Jules still hadn’t looked up, she was pretty sure she saw tears in his eyes. She hadn’t seen Jules cry since before their father had died. “I’m sorry, Livvy,” he said. “You must be so ashamed of me.”

“What?” Livvy asked. “No! Of course not. Why would I be ashamed of you? You’re Julian!”

“I’m in love with my parabatai,” Jules looked up at her now. There really were tears in his eyes. It was terrifying. “How could you not be disgusted by that?”

“Why should I be?” Livvy said. “You’re my brother. I love you. You and Emma would be perfect for each other.”

“‘Would be,’” Julian repeated, sounding a little bitter. “Becoming Emma’s parabatai was the biggest mistake of my life, and I knew it was a mistake when I was making it. Emma doesn’t know that, but it’s true. I never really wanted to be her parabatai--I think even back then I knew on some level that my feelings for her weren’t platonic--but it was right after the Dark War, and we were a bunch of orphans. The Clave was going to separate us, and we needed each other. Becoming parabatai was the only way to make sure Emma could stay with us.”

He spoke so quickly the words tripped over each, like he’d been waiting a lifetime to get the words out, to explain. Livvy tried to choke back a sob but failed. Before Jules could react, she grabbed him by the hoodie, dragged him into a sitting position and hugged him with all her strength.

After a moment, he wrapped his arms around her and hugged back. She could feel the heat of his fever radiating into her; his face burned like fire where it touched her neck. Still, this embrace was still something special, because for the first time in her life, she was holding Julian not the other way around.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered into his hair. “I’m so, so sorry.” She wasn’t even sure what she was apologizing for. She had realized in the last few weeks that Julian’s life was a fallout zone of mistakes and wrongs and injuries that most people didn’t even see through his facade enough to notice. She wanted to make things better for him, but she didn’t know how.

Eventually, they pulled apart. Livvy had a million more questions, but Jules was obviously exhausted. He was sick and needed rest more than anything else. They could deal with Livvy’s myriad questions at a later date. She eased him back onto his pillows and tucked the blankets around him. Then she went to the bathroom and got a wet cloth for his forehead.

Neither of them said another word, but Livvy sat with him until she was sure he was asleep. When he was deeply asleep, she let herself quietly out of his room and did what she always did when she was upset or needed to think.

She went to find Ty.

~~~~

Ty and Kit were sitting on Ty’s bed. Ty had a book open on his lap and was rambling about something with a content smile on his face. Kit looked up when she opened the door and his face pinched with annoyance. “There you are!” he said. “You could have helped us with all those dishes.”

“I was talking to Jules,” Livvy said. “He’s not feeling well.”

“You know that means the three of us are eventually going to get that flu too,” Ty said turning a page of his book.

Kit threw himself violently back onto the bed and stared up at the ceiling. “Great,” he said. “Just what I need.”

“That’s what happens when you have a lot of siblings,” Livvy said. “If one of us gets sick, eventually we all do.”

She thought she was doing a decent job of sounding like nothing was on her mind, but Kit pushed himself up on his elbows, one eyebrow raised. “Is something wrong?” he asked.

Ty lifted his head. “Livvy?”

“It’s a long story,” Livvy said. “Don’t worry about it, Kit.” She didn’t say anything to Ty. She would tell him about Jules and Emma, she couldn’t not, but Jules had taken her into confidence by telling her his secret. He’d no doubt assumed she’d tell her twin when he’d decided to trust her, but he probably hadn’t assumed she’d tell Kit. Kit was extremely nice and Livvy trusted him in most things, but he was still an outsider and there was no reason for him to know Julian’s secrets. She would get Ty alone later and fill him in.

Kit was still looking at her skeptically, his lips pulled to the side as he studied her. She needed to change the subject.

“What were you two talking about?” she asked.

Ty explained the conversation and Kit eventually got into it as well, though he was obviously trying to make it seem like he wasn’t actually interested in whatever they had been talking about. Livvy wasn’t sure why he bothered and at that moment, didn’t particularly care. She’d figured that she’d just wait to get Ty alone and then tell him, but now she knew she couldn’t. The new information about Emma and Jules was eating a hole in her stomach. She needed to talk to Ty now; she needed to get Kit to leave.

“Kit,” she said. “I think I hear Tavvy calling. Can you go see what he wants?”

Kit looked affronted. “Why me? Why can’t you do it?”

“You’re not interested in this anyway,” Livvy said. “I am. Why should I be the one to go?”

Kit’s mouth opened and closed as he grasped how his feigned nonchalance had backfired on him. Livvy watched him try to decide which was worse; going to check on Tavvy or admitting that he’d only been pretending not to be interested. After a minute, pride won out and he got to his feet. “Fine,” he sighed dramatically. “I’ll be back.”

He left the room. Livvy climbed to her feet, crossed to the door and locked it behind him. There, he was gone.

She turned back to find Ty looking at her in confusion. “I didn’t hear Tavvy calling,” he said.

“He’s not,” Livvy admitted.

“Then why did you say he was?”

“I need to talk to you about something. Without Kit.”

Ty bit his lip, looking uncomfortable. “Did Kit really think that what I was talking about was boring?”

“No,” Livvy reassured him. “He’s really interested, but ashamed to admit it because he thinks it will ruin tough guy reputation. I just needed to get rid of him for a while.”

“Okay,” Ty said slowly. “Why?”

Livvy went back to the bed. She sat down across from him and sighed. “Jules and I were talking about some pretty heavy stuff,” she said quietly. “He told me something really important about him and Emma…”

[aratilightwood]

On the anniversary of Livia Blackthorn’s death.

An Au where Kit never left for Devon and Ty didn’t attend the Scholomance.

Instead of Irene, we have baby turtles!

(A revised and edited version).

...

It was a warm summer evening in Los Angeles, and Kit Herondale was trying to catch up on his sleep.

It had been a very productive day.

Two hours of rune studies was taught by Diana after breakfast, and Kit unsuccessfully tried to remember as many runes as he could.

Another two hours were spent in the training room with Jace so Kit could become familiar with different weapons, as well as master knife throwing.

He was still unsure of which weapons he’d likely choose when going into battle.

It was a relief when he got the opportunity to take a break for lunch. He was hopeful that the educational part of his day was over.

Diana was however firm about Kit learning the histories of the clave. The cold peace was his least favourite.

Finally, after acknowledging that Kit was straining to keep his eyes open while reading old and withered books, Diana decided to call it a day.

But even though Kit was very tired, he struggled to fall asleep.

One year, Kit thought.

He knew that at midday tomorrow, it would be exactly one year since the incident in Idris.

Kit remembered the day as if it was yesterday.

Every time he closed his eyes, he heard the same screams of horror from the council hall. The events played out on a constant loop in his mind.

Given the atmosphere of the institute for the past week, no one else was coping well with the anniversary of Livia Blackthorn’s death.

Her room remained untouched since the Blackthorns left for London when Malcolm Fade posed a threat.

Julian stopped making pancakes for breakfast on Fridays, much to Drusilla and Tavvy’s dismay.

In fact, most meals were take outs ordered from the nearest pizza or Chinese restaurant.

Helen and Aline tried to ease the grief and tense atmosphere. The children became their responsibility after they were appointed co-heads of the institute.

But it was difficult to reconnect with your family, especially if you’d been away from them for five years.

Now Kit tossed and turned on his double bed. He dreaded waking up the next day, and seeing all the Blackthorns drown in their sorrow.

He couldn’t decide how he would provide any comfort to Ty, or anyone else in the Institute.

Being a Herondale, he felt like an outsider, intruding on the privacy of the Institute.

At least in that aspect, he had something in common with Diana and Emma.

Just when Kit was about to fall asleep, there was a sound at his door.

Three knocks.

He sat up in his bed, rubbed his right eye and silently cursed.

Of course he wasn’t the only one unable to sleep.

But who could’ve disturbed Kit at that time of night?

“Who is it?” He asked in his raspy voice.

“Um, it’s Ty... can I come in?”

Kit was wide awake now.

His annoyance was left abandoned.

“Yes, of course.”

Ty entered the room and was wearing a half sleeved black t-shirt, dark jeans and trainers.

His black hair looked unkept, and in need of cutting. He had shadows under his eyes.

It made Kit wonder why he hadn’t changed into his pyjamas already.

It was nearly 12am.

“I need your help,” Ty stated with a troubled expression.

‘What’s wrong?’ Kit asked softly.

He swung his legs out from under the covers, and placed his feet into slippers.

“I was walking along the beach and found this... this nest of turtle eggs.”

“And?”

“They were being raided by a group of stray dogs. Three eggs have already been taken.”

Kit sat there speechless and tried to piece together a coherent response.

“Can you come and help me watch over them?” Ty asked.

Kit didn’t have to think about it twice.

He got out of bed and put a hoodie over his pyjamas.

“I’ll come with you.”

They walked hastily out of the bedroom and Institute, while treading quietly to avoid waking others.

The beach wasn’t far and they were two shadows in the dark.

The sand was soft as a blanket under Kit’s feet.

“We’re nearly there,” Ty claimed.

Kit hurried along as Ty increased his pace, very eager to reach the turtle’s nest.

It wasn’t long before they reached the area on which a turtle had laid nine eggs.

With a closer examination, Kit realised that three of them had been cracked open.

The premature baby turtles had been snatched from the safety of their temporary homes.

“The dogs have already taken three. I don’t want them taking anymore. We should stay here all night to ensure that doesn’t happen,” Ty said.

Kit regarded the nest and turned his face towards Ty.

“Sounds like a plan.”

He proceeded to sit on top of the sand, before laying back and looking up with a smile.

Ty laid down next to him with a sigh of relief.

At least twenty minutes passed and the two boys stared at the stars in silence.

Kit wondered what life would’ve been like if there was no shadow world and no shadowhunters.

Perhaps he could’ve been a captain on a ship, and faced adventure in different parts of the world.

All the Institute shadowhunters would’ve been his companions, with the exception of Emma, who was terrified of the ocean.

“You know what’s strange?’ Ty asked.

“What?” Kit questioned.

It was so quiet that he thought Ty had already fallen asleep.

Ty, however, kept his focus on the sky above them.

Kit took advantage of this by admiring the side profile of his face.

“When I found this nest, the first person I thought of was Livia.”

Kit felt a pang in his chest and furrowed his eye brows.

“You miss your sister. I understand that.”

Ty shook his head.

“It’s not only that. I mean, I do miss her... but the reason why she came to mind was because of something Jules told me.”

Kit waited for Ty to explain further.

“It must’ve been a month or so after Livvy’s death. Julian told me how much she wanted to run an institute when she was older, and how she would never have the chance to. Livvy was always so caring. She always wanted to have responsibility. The more I thought about it, the more convinced I’d become about how good she would’ve been at that job.”

Kit nodded as if agreeing.

“I’ve no doubt she would’ve been a great Institute head.”

‘“...and when I saw this nest, I immediately thought of how much Livvy would want me to care for and protect it.”

There was a long pause.

“So... you’re doing this for her? For Livia?” Kit asked.

“Partly... you know I’ve always liked animals,” Ty replied with a sad smile.

“Then we’ll stay until they hatch, even if we have to lie here all week.”

There was no reply.

Kit looked at Ty more intently and realised he’d fallen asleep.

“Goodnight Ty.”

Hours passed slowly, and Kit was thankful when he finally saw the sun peaking out from under the horizon.

Sunrise in Los Angeles would’ve made a great landscape for painting with the amalgamation of: orange, red and blue.

It was nearly midday when seagulls began to screech above the shore, and the beach was clustered with mundanes.

Kit had struggled to stay awake all night to keep an eye on the turtle eggs, when Ty fell asleep.

He was impressed with himself, having survived a night of sleeplessness. But was ridden with exhaustion.

Now, Ty stirred in his sleep and groggily opened his eyes.

“Good you’re awake,” Kit said with a smile.

An expression of panic came upon Ty’s face and he sat up immediately.

“I fell asleep... the nest...”

“I stayed awake all night to keep an eye on it.”

Ty looked down at the nest with astonishment.

All six eggs were left unharmed.

“All night? You should’ve woke me up so you could get some sleep.”

“It’s alright, honestly. I wasn’t that tired,” Kit lied.

Ty turned his head and looked towards the ocean.

“What time is it?” Kit asked.

He planned on going to the institute and getting them a bite to eat.

“It just struck 12pm,” Ty replied as he looked at his watch.

As soon as Ty said this, there was a sound of something breaking.

Both boys turned their attention to the nest.

One of the eggs had cracked open, and a tiny head of a turtle peaked out from underneath.

Kit smiled widely, and saw the same expression mirrored in Ty’s face.

Soon the second egg followed, then the third and the fourth.

When all the eggs opened, the turtles climbed out of their nest and made their way to the water.

Kit and Ty walked together slowly after them, and stopped when they reached the shoreline.

The water engulfed the turtles one by one, and invited them into their blue oceanic home.

[shadow-gods-magic]

Blackstairs Children

No one can convince me that Emma and Julian don’t have a daughter named Livia or something like it maybe Olivia or even Cordelia. She is the exact replica of her aunt, Livvy. She has her brown hair and her blackthorn eyes that shine just a bit brighter than everyone else’s, and Julian blames it on her aunt watching over her. Ty just smiles because he knows it’s true, and Livvy (in ghost form) just talks his ear off about her all the time. “That girl is such a badass” or “she is just so pretty, I wonder where she got that from” with a knowing smirk.

She’s just their youngest. They have three other children. The oldest is a girl, Eleanor. She has Emma’s blonde hair and, oddly enough, Ty’s eyes. She is a lot like Ty too. She wants to go to the scholomance. She is quieter than her younger siblings, but she’s really protective. She is two years older than Livvy (Emma and Jules' daughter)  and a year older than her brothers. She is best friends with her cousin, Carlota, who is Cristina and Mark’s daughter, biologically, but is very close to Kieran. The two bring out something in each other. They are both naturally calm and level-headed people, but Carlota likes to party and have fun, while Eleanor doesn’t. Carlota helps Eleanor let loose, and Eleanor helps Carlota think before she acts. Eleanor doesn’t like to train (though she isn’t bad) and chooses to stay home and watch multiple scanners for those on patrol.

Next, they have two twin boys, Andrew and John. Andrew is the older twin and ends up having the blackthorn eyes and hair. John got the blackthorn hair but skipped the eyes and ended up having Emma’s brown ones. The two of them are always going around pulling pranks on everyone in the institute, with the help of their younger sister. Julian pretends to be annoyed but actually finds them hilarious, Emma is always so proud of her boys when they pull a monumental one off, and Eleanor really is just annoyed. The twins fight with their older sister quite a bit, but when they get along it usually ends with them having put a five thousand-piece puzzle together or painting a family portrait. The twins and their younger sister get along so well it’s kind of scary, but Julian and Emma love it. The brothers are extremely protective, especially over boys. The twins don’t fight that much but when they do it’s big, catastrophically big. It sometimes ends up with one of them throwing punches or insults that the other doesn’t get over for days. They always make up though.

All four of them end up together in the academy at one point. Eleanor helps her sister, Livvy, with school whenever she needs it (though she usually doesn’t and just wants to spend time with her sister.) John turns out to be quite the ladies man, disgusting all of his siblings, and there are not many girls at the academy who don’t wish bad things on him. John and Livvy train together every Wednesday after classes; they are both trying to catch up to their mother and Livvy is nearly there. Andrew and Livvy, however, are practically attached at the hip and they plan to become parabatai, much to the delight of the family and dismay of Livvy’s best friend, Celine. 

Livvy is incredibly close to her uncle, Kit. She spends a lot of time with him and her uncle Ty. Kit fascinates her with all his mundane stories and she loves to see his powers as well as allow him and her uncle Jem and aunt Tessa, whom she adores, to help her with her surprising powers. Eleanor spends a lot of time with Ty and Diego as they prepare her for the scholomance. She also gravitates toward Cristina who is like a second mom. The twins spend time with Mark and Kieran and they consult each other on pranks. Livvy is close to both Clary and Jace and Simon and Izzy. She also spends as much time as she can with her favorite second dads Magnus and Alec. 

Livvy spends a lot of her time in New York because she is best friends with at least one of the TMI couples children. Her whole life everyone predicted that she and Jonathan, Clary and Jace’s son, would end up together and in the end they do. Eleanor comes out as bisexual with Ty and Kit’s support and she admits she has been in love with, Elaine, Izzy and Simon’s daughter. At first, Elaine rejects her but eventually, she falls in love with Eleanor too. Andrew finally meets Nikola Ashdown at 22. She has bright red hair like her father and a French accent from years at the Paris institute. They fall in love at first glance, but it takes three years for them to admit it. John falls in love with Celine Herondale, the best friend of Livvy.

All the kids are close to their parents. Eleanor bonds with her dad over painting and her mom with a love of Hidden Treasures. The boys become Julian’s little pain in the necks as he calls them, but really they love each other and sometimes their dad becomes a third member of their group. Julian becomes the boys’ supportive sounding board for girls, though, as Emma reminds him, he may not be much help because he always loved one girl, and Julian tells her he still does and kisses her to which they boys respond “Ew.” The twins are mama’s boys through and through but Emma doesn’t let them get away with anything. Livvy is such a daddy’s girl, and he fawns over her because she’s his baby girl. He teaches her to cook and she carries on the famous Blackthorn pancakes. Emma and Livvy are best friends. They train together and Livvy tells her mom everything. When Livvy tells Emma that she and Jonathan had sex, Livvy cries and Emma holds her. Her mother then tells her “it can’t be worse than your father and I. We did it on the beach and, oh, the sand.” “ ew gross, mom.”  Then they laugh up a storm. Julian who is on the other side of his daughter’s bedroom door after seeing her come home crying is very confused at all the giggling he hears.

[julescarstairs]

Mystery Jules. I will only respond to mystery Jules from now on.

(Though for future reference, so you know, my name is actually Emma! (Ironic, I know, but isn’t it fitting? Now there’s a Jules and an Emma in the Julian pain grave)

In any case, yes. I accept your invitation onto our Self Dug Grave of Julian Pain™️ as long as I can bring snacks.

Honestly you guys are only just now making me realise how Julian’s love language with his siblings is very much occupied by actions and quality time. I can’t believe I’m only just realising this now after my countless hours of thinking about Julian, but it’s honestly so soft to me. He might not outrightly say he loves and cares for his siblings at every possible opportunity, but his actions speak far louder than his words: he literally set up an entire computer for Ty when he really didn’t know the first thing about how they worked. I imagine he spent hours helping Livvy with the layout of her bedroom when she decided to redecorate it. He stayed up late and watched horror movies with Dru when no one else would, even if they spooked him sometimes. He would be there in a heartbeat whenever Tavvy had nightmares, and would sit up with him night after night until he fell asleep. He would petition to the Clave every year to get them to bring Helen home, even when they rejected his requests again and again and again. He committed how his family liked their pancakes (and even their eggs, in Drusilla’s case) to memory, and made a special effort to serve them in a particular order so that Ty got his first, and so on so forth. He took Tavvy to the art studio to paint whenever he noticed that his baby was getting distressed. He would give each and every one of his siblings his absolute, undivided attention whenever they needed him. I mean, he literally stepped up and became their parent when he himself was still a child. He chose that lifestyle because he loved them, and wanted to give them the childhood he couldn’t have.

I may have entirely missed the mark of your conversation in my whole tangent about Julian’s love language, but your texts got me thinking about that, so, here you are 😂💗

I digress. It is HUGE to me that Julian is utilising Blackthorn Hall as a sort of great passion project, where he can finally show off his artistry and in extension the love he feels for his family and for Emma and for everything in the surrounds. After so long spent hiding his art because of the pure distilled love that he had bled into every piece, at last he can showcase it with pride. There is no more hiding, ducking through the dark, silent nights of painting pieces he felt were doomed to be unseen. The only secret he has in this moment is one that he is taking great pleasure in keeping, because it’s more of a surprise if anything. He enjoys keeping this secret because he’s doing it because he wants to, not because he feels like he has to, if that makes sense.

But YES! Thank you for inviting me into the discussion! I really appreciate it 🥹💗

@bookishjules @lifeofbrybooks

@julescarstairs you've been enlisted to join us in our self-dug grave of julian pain

as you, yourself said,

(For context, I'm black here and @lifeofbrybooks is green)

[panicatwallmaria]

halloween with the blackthorns & co

GAH so going on what @tiberiusblacktorn just posted about kit being excited about halloween early (it’s never too early for halloween things though), here’s some headcanons for kit introducing the blackthorns+emma+cristina to halloween properly (post-LoS I’m sorry guys, i’m trying to adjust to a livvyless world (i can’t really)):

- so one time kit casually mentions in a conversation, while they are all eating pancakes or something, that halloween (or, spooky season) will soon be upon them and dru’s mouth just falls open.

- of course she had heard about halloween but shadowhunters don’t really celebrate it and kit is furious at this.

- like, very very furious.

- he lowers his voice and tells everyone that halloween is the BEST holiday ever, even better than christmas.

- he has tavvy’s attention now.

- kit begins to explain that on the spookiest night of the year, everyone dresses up as spookily as they can(kit loves the word spooky wowie), they can prank their friends and best of all, they go from door to door getting candy etc.

- by this point everyone is staring at kit, gobsmacked. they all slowly turn to julian and look accusingly at him (like it’s his fault they don’t celebrate halloween, he argues).

- emma now stands up, points at kit and tells him that this year is a year of change and they will partake in this ‘halloween’ he speaks of.

- dru now legs it to the computer room to find good costume ideas and mark is not long behind her.

- a few nights later, everyone besides julian is scattered about the computer room, with ty and dru at the desk.

- they are slightly panicking because kit said that halloween is october 31st. today is the 30th.

- earlier on they discovered pumpkin carving and julian had been sent on a quest to get pumpkins for everyone.

- emma keeps running back and forth from her room to the computer room, bringing numerous odd outfits and dresses with her.

- she can’t seem to make up her mind though and she just dumps the clothes on cristina, who is grinning from behind a pile of clothes

- whenever something really weird is thrown on the pile (like a skirt that looks strangely like a tutu? no one knows why emma would have that), mark grabs it and tries to figure out how it works

- so cristina is buried under clothes, mark is wearing a tutu (on a leg? his head? who knows) and dru and ty are practically bursting with excitement as they look at decorations and (detective for ty, scream masks for dru) costumes.

- meanwhile, however, tavvy has brought kit into the corner of the room.

- he distinctly remembers kit saying that halloween is a time for pranking and he wants kit to help him prank dru somehow.

- and kit, the lovely boy he is, would never say no to a good prank.

- tavvy frowns, realising something. he tells kit that dru doesn’t get scared, at all. so maybe she isn’t the best victim after all.

- they go through other possible victims: julian, no (they wouldn’t want to incur his wrath); mark- he might find it too confusing, tavvy argues; cristina, she’s too kind to be mean to; ty- kit argues for his case, saying it wouldn’t be fair on him because of all that had happened recently (plus kit just doesn’t have it in him to prank ty).

- and that left them with…

- emma.

- she would love a good prank, kit mutters and tavvy gets really excited. emma it is then.

- julian bursts through the doors and glares at everyone.

- “your pumpkins are in the car, wHY ARE YOU ALL SITTTING AROUND?”

- cut to thirty minutes later, and everyone is now running around the dining room. mark and cristina come back and forth from the training room with varieties of weapons (kit is confused as to why you would carve a pumpkin with a scythe when you could just use a knife or dagger).

- emma is making a mess of hers using cortana, much to everyone else’s amusement.

- julian refuses to let anyone else see what he is doing until it is finished.

- dru is carving jason’s mask into hers; ty is creating what kit thinks is possibly the cutest bee eVER; julian has entrusted supervision of tavvy to kit (jules does glare at poor kit every now and then) as they got along so well earlier.

- kit is showing tavvy how to make a grinning face that could either be seen as cute, as tavvy insists it is, or completely horrifying, as kit insists it is but to himself. kit’s pumpkin is also sporting a grinning face, he turns out to be pretty good at pumpkin carving.

- when they get back, cristina and mark end up giggling and throwing pumpkin guts at each other.

- everyone ends up joining in and tavvy runs over to julian, laughing.

- ty hangs back though, thinking that this is the first time everyone has been truly happy ever since…

- kit is the first one to notice through the pumpkin guts that ty was gone and he darts out of the room, not looking back once.

- after a few minutes, kit finds ty standing outside of livvy’s room. kit freezes a few metres away.

- taking a deeper breath than he would’ve thought possible, he goes and stands almost shoulder-to-shoulder with ty.

- “she would’ve really loved this. halloween, all of it. being here with us,” ty says, but he isn’t crying. there’s a small smile on his face.

- “she would’ve, there’s no doubt about it,” kit says.

- a hand squeezes kit’s shoulder.

- “livvy is happy for all of us, for you ty,” dru smiles back at kit and ty and then returns her gaze to the door.

- in hindsight, kit suspects that he should’ve initiated some kind of group ‘we’ll get through this together’ hug but dru isn’t one for hugs, and neither are he and ty if he’s being completely honest.

- so instead, he rests his hand on dru’s and holds onto ty’s arm with his other and,for the first time in what seemed like forever, he genuinely feels like his life can go on again.

hahahahaha this ended up being a bit longer than anticipated so i had to stop it because i decided halfway through to convert this to fanfic form along with what comes after it, if anyone would wanna read that?! anywho, thanks for reading!!

[notquitepunk-rock]

1. Pancakes with jules bc cmon. Who will miss an opp to make breakfast with daddy jules🙏

2. Coffee date with Cristina. BECAUSE COFFEEEEE💕 and also emma will probably make me run and as much as i love the girl i prefer not to move my limbs at all

3. Movie night with Dru~ BECAUSE HORROR MOVIES R BAE AND DRUSILLA BLACKTHORN IS A GODDESS. No offence to livvy tho- i dunno if i could possibly make a partner as good as ty

4. Board games with kit. I would never miss an opportunity to fawn over a herondale yk i would never.

5. Horse riding- yes pls.

WELCOME TO THE INSTITUTE GAME!⚔️➰

🌟𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐫𝐮𝐥𝐞𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲 𝐬𝐢𝐦𝐩𝐥𝐞🌟

You choose one of two possible answers and EXPLAIN why you chose it!

Tag people whose opinions you would like to know💭

If I didn’t tag you, but you want to play, then just repost🔁💕

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