#judgement of atlantis

[sweetmeldies]

FoA Episode 3 😭 Should i get the last blade DLC too? Is it worth it?

[sga-mcshep-4ever]

"Don't load up so much. It'll slow you down. Two extra magazines each." "All right." "What do you need that for?" "So what if it's the Major?" "Then he'll get hit with a Wraith stunner instead of a P-90." "What if he sees us first?" "He'll probably hear you first." "Are you telling me to shut up again?" "Again." "Right."

[apoloadonisandnarcissus]

Of Sauron [Hypothetical] Redemption

Is Sauron redeemable?

This question is particularly active in the Sauron x Galadriel fandom, for obvious reasons. But it can be of interest to any Tolkien fan, really. Brace yourselves, this is a long read and we are going deep into Tolkien legendarium, here.

To many, the idea that Sauron is redeemable is absurd in itself because of how Tolkien describes him as “the second visible incarnation of evil”; “reincarnation of Evil, and a thing lusting for Complete Power” (Letter 131); or “shadow of Morgoth” (The Silmarillion). All of this means that Sauron is absolute and pure evil, yes? And hence, he has no possibility of redemption, whatsoever? 

Not quite.

For starters, there’s an idea that needs to be deconstructed here: Tolkien lore being “black and white”, or pure Evil vs. pure Good. It isn’t.

And this was actually, a grievance Tolkien himself had ever since his work first got published. The critics and the public, seemed determined to judge his books on an absolute dichotomy, without any nuance. Ironic, many are doing the same until this day (and probably the reason why Christopher Tolkien hated the Peter Jackson adaptations so much).  

Some reviewers have called the whole thing simple-minded, just a plain fight between Good and Evil, with all the good just good, and the bad just bad. Pardonable, perhaps (though at least Boromir has been overlooked) in people in a hurry, and with only a fragment to read, and, of course, without the earlier written but unpublished Elvish histories. But the Elves are not wholly good or in the right. Not so much because they had flirted with Sauron; as because with or without his assistance they were 'embalmers'. They wanted to have their cake and eat it: to live in the mortal historical Middle-earth because they had become fond of it (and perhaps because they there had the advantages of a superior caste), and so tried to stop its change and history, stop its growth, keep it as a pleasaunce, even largely a desert, where they could be 'artists' – and they were overburdened with sadness and nostalgic regret.  Tolkien Letter 154

Tolkien admits his lore doesn’t deal with ��absolute evil” because he doesn’t believe in such a thing:

In my story I do not deal in Absolute Evil. I do not think there is such a thing, since that is Zero. I do not think that at any rate any 'rational being' is wholly evil. Satan fell. In my myth Morgoth fell beasts and monsters, and the Unknown. The defence of the realm may then indeed become symbolic of the human situation. Before Creation of the physical world. Tolkien Letter 183

Tolkien's Sauron

Did Tolkien created Sauron as a nuanced villain in his lore? What does he say about him? 

And there is Sauron. In the Silmarillion and Tales of the First Age Sauron was a being of Valinor perverted to the service of the Enemy and becoming his chief captain and servant. He repents in fear when the First Enemy is utterly defeated, but in the end does not do as was commanded, return to the judgement of the gods. He lingers in Middle-earth. Very slowly, beginning with fair motives: the reorganising and rehabilitation of the ruin of Middle-earth, 'neglected by the gods', he becomes a reincarnation of Evil, and a thing lusting for Complete Power – and so consumed ever more fiercely with hate (especially of gods and Elves). All through the twilight of the Second Age the Shadow is growing in the East of Middle-earth, spreading its sway more and more over Men – who multiply as the Elves begin to fade. The three main themes are thus The Delaying Elves that lingered in Middle-earth; Sauron's growth to a new Dark Lord, master and god of Men; and Numenor-Atlantis. Tolkien Letter 131

Mairon, the Maia of Aulë, was not evil in the beginning (because nothing is, in Tolkien lore).  He was corrupted by Morgoth. He repents of his crimes under Morgoth but doesn’t do penitance. During the Second Age, he begins his rise to power, being a cautionary tale of “the road to hell is paved with good intentions”.

In Season 1 of "Rings of Power", we saw "repentant Mairon" aka Halbrand:

In Season 2, Annatar was introduced, and he symbolizes "Sauron the reformer", who wants to rebuilt Middle-earth with good intentions:

Sauron was of course not 'evil' in origin. He was a 'spirit' corrupted by the Prime Dark Lord (the Prime sub-creative Rebel) Morgoth. He was given an opportunity of repentance, when Morgoth was overcome, but could not face the humiliation of recantation, and suing for pardon; and so his temporary turn to good and 'benevolence' ended in a greater relapse, until he became the main representative of Evil of later ages. But at the beginning of the Second Age he was still beautiful to look at, or could still assume a beautiful visible shape – and was not indeed wholly evil, not unless all 'reformers' who want to hurry up with 'reconstruction' and 'reorganization' are wholly evil, even before pride and the lust to exert their will eat them up. Tolkien Letter 153

During the Second Age, Sauron begins his rise to power, with good intentions, at first. However, his pride and lust for power becomes too great, and he aspires to become a “God of Men” (no longer a mere Maia).

And this is probably Sauron's greater crime (sin) in the legendarium, since Eru himself is called to intervene: Sauron was first defeated by a 'miracle': a direct action of God the Creator, changing the fashion of the world, when appealed to by Manwë [...] reduced to 'a spirit of hatred borne on a dark wind', I do not think one need boggle at this spirit carrying off the One Ring, upon which his power of dominating minds now largely depended (Letter 211).

Because of his admiration of Strength he [Sauron] had become a follower of Morgoth and fell with him down into the depths of evil, becoming his chief agent in Middle Earth. When Morgoth was defeated by the Valar finally he forsook his allegiance; but out of fear only; he did not present himself to the Valar or sue for pardon, and remained in Middle Earth. When he found how greatly his knowledge was admired by all other rational creatures and how easy it was to influence them, his pride became boundless. By the end of the Second Age he assumed the position of Morgoth's representative. By the end of the Third Age (though actually much weaker than before) he claimed to be Morgoth returned. Tolkien Letter 183 (note)

Let's dig in the "Sauron the supervillain":

The corrupted, as was Melkor/Morgoth and his followers (of whom Sauron was one of the chief) saw in them the ideal material for subjects and slaves, to whom they could become masters and 'gods', envying the Children, and secretly hating them, in proportion as they became rebels against the One (and Manwë his Lieutenant in Eä). Tolkien Letter 212

In my story Sauron represents as near an approach to the wholly evil will as is possible. He had gone the way of all tyrants: beginning well, at least on the level that while desiring to order all things according to his own wisdom he still at first considered the (economic) well-being of other inhabitants of the Earth. But he went further than human tyrants in pride and the lust for domination, being in origin an immortal (angelic) spirit. In The Lord of the Rings the conflict is not basically about 'freedom', though that is naturally involved. It is about God, and His sole right to divine honour. The Eldar and the Númenóreans believed in The One, the true God, and held worship of any other person an abomination. Sauron desired to be a God-King, and was held to be this by his servants; if he had been victorious he would have demanded divine honour from all rational creatures and absolute temporal power over the whole world.   Tolkien Letter 183

What these quotes tell us, is this: while Sauron isn’t “absolute evil” (because Tolkien himself didn’t deal with this in his legendarium, nor did he believed such a thing exists), Sauron's will (desires; intentions; goals) came pretty close to “wholly evil”.

Sauron is unmistakable evil, obviously distinguishable from “good”: he’s not a grey character, nor an anti-hero in any way, shape or form. He’s a full-on villain, some might even say a "super-villain", really. However, he’s not pure irredeemably wicked evil in Tolkien lore.

Why?

Tolkien's Ideas of Redemption

This goes back to Tolkien’s religious beliefs (Christian-Catholic) and how they are present in his legendarium; in 1953, he wrote this about the Orcs: 

the Diabolus Morgoth did, and started making things 'for himself, to be their Lord', these would then 'be', even if Morgoth broke the supreme ban against making other 'rational' creatures like Elves or Men. They would at least 'be' real physical realities in the physical world, however evil they might prove, even 'mocking' the Children of God. They would be Morgoth's greatest Sins, abuses of his highest privilege, and would be creatures begotten of Sin, and naturally bad. (I nearly wrote 'irredeemably bad'; but that would be going too far. Because by accepting or tolerating their making – necessary to their actual existence – even Orcs would become part of the World, which is God's and ultimately good.)   I have represented at least the Orcs as pre-existing real beings on whom the Dark Lord has exerted the fullness of his power in remodeling and corrupting them, not making them. That God would 'tolerate' that, seems no worse theology than the toleration of the calculated dehumanizing of Men by tyrants that goes on today.  Tolkien Letter 153 

In 1965, W.H. Auden asked Tolkien if the notion of Orcs (an entire race that should be seen as irredeemably wicked) was not heretical:

With regard to The Lord of the Rings, I cannot claim to be a sufficient theologian to say whether my notion of Orcs is heretical or not. I don't feel under any obligation to make my story fit with formalized Christian theology, though I actually intended it to be consonant with Christian thought and belief, which is asserted somewhere, Book Five, page 190,1 where Frodo asserts that the orcs are not evil in origin.   Tolkien Letter 169 

And now you know the reason behind Orc families in "Rings of Power".

Tolkien himself went back and forward with this notion, or even if the Orcs had “souls”, to begin with, but in the end his faith probably got the best of him. We also see this with his thoughts on Gollum:  

In which case (as I believe) salvation from ruin will depend on something apparently unconnected: the general sanctity (and humility and mercy) of the sacrificial person [...] Gollum had had his chance of repentance, and of returning generosity with love; and had fallen off the knife-edge.  Tolkien Letter 191

On the importance of repentance, even among the Valar:

The Fall or corruption, therefore, of all things in it and all inhabitants of it, was a possibility if not inevitable. Trees may 'go bad' as in the Old Forest; Elves may turn into Orcs, and if this required the special perversive malice of Morgoth, still Elves themselves could do evil deeds. Even the 'good' Valar as inhabiting the World could at least err; as the Great Valar did in their dealings with the Elves; or as the lesser of their kind (as the Istari or wizards) could in various ways become self-seeking.   Aulë, for instance, one of the Great, in a sense 'fell'; for he so desired to see the Children, that he became impatient and tried to anticipate the will of the Creator. Being the greatest of all craftsmen he tried to make children according to his imperfect knowledge of their kind. When he had made thirteen, God spoke to him in anger, but not without pity: for Aulë had done this thing not out of evil desire to have slaves and subjects of his own, but out of impatient love, desiring children to talk to and teach, sharing with them the praise of Ilúvatar and his great love of the materials of which the world is made. The One rebuked Aulë, saying that he had tried to usurp the Creator's power; but he could not give independent life to his makings. He had only one life, his own derived from the One, and could at most only distribute it. 'Behold' said the One: 'these creatures of thine have only thy will, and thy movement. Though you have devised a language for them, they can only report to thee thine own thought. This is a mockery of me.'  Then Aulë in grief and repentance humbled himself and asked for pardon. And he said: 'I will destroy these images of my presumption, and wait upon thy will.' And he took a great hammer, raising it to smite the eldest of his images; but it flinched and cowered from him. And as he withheld his stroke, astonished, he heard the laughter of Ilúvatar. 'Do you wonder at this?' he said. 'Behold! thy creatures now live, free from thy will! For I have seen thy humility, and taken pity on your impatience. Thy making I have taken up into my design.'   This is the Elvish legend of the making of the Dwarves; but the Elves report that Iluvatar said thus also: 'Nonetheless I will not suffer my design to be forestalled: thy children shall not awake before mine own.' And he commanded Aule to lay the fathers of the Dwarves severally in deep places, each with his mate, save Dúrin the eldest who had none. There they should sleep long, until Ilúvatar bade them awake.   Nonetheless there has been for the most part little love between the Dwarves and the children of Iluvatar. And of the fate that Ilúvatar has set upon the children of Aulë beyond the Circles of the world Elves and men know nothing, and if Dwarves know they do not speak of it.  Tolkien Letter 212

This is pure Christian doctrine.

Even though Tolkien legendarium is not a copy-paste from the Bible (and it has several other inspirations), it’s pretty clear that Eru Ilúvatar represents the Christian God. And even though God himself had different interpretations throughout History, I think we should see it as the God from Tolkien’s time (and our time, too): “God the Father” (which makes sense with what Tolkien created on his lore).

In Catholicism (Tolkien’s religion), God is just (God’s justice) but he’s also merciful, and he loves all of his children, even those who fallen into sin. No one is unredeemable in the eyes of God (no matter how deep one has fallen), if one truly repents and makes amends for his sins ("the virtue of penance"). God is always willing to give their faithful a second chance, if they accept him as their one true God, and make penitence in His service (whatever that might be).

In the lore, we know that the Children of Ilúvatar are Elves and Men. However, all the deities (Valar and Maiar) were also created by Eru. From a Christian perspective, the Valar are archangels, and the Maiar are angels. This is an on-going debate within Theology, because some agree that angels are “sons of God”, while others don’t. For the sake of the argument, I’ll just add this: Job 38:7 - when the morning stars sang together and all the sons of God [angels] shouted for joy. But more on that later.

This means that Sauron is, indeed, redeemable. But he has to make that choice, himself. "Free will"; another major theme in Tolkien lore.

And, the true question, here, isn’t “is Sauron redeemable?” but “is Sauron capable of repentance”? 

In Tolkien “canon”, meaning the events of “The Silmarillion”, “The Hobbit”, up until the end of “The Lord of the Rings” trilogy (First to the dawn of the Fourth Age) the answer is no.

After the One ring is destroyed by Frodo, Sauron’s spirit is left so diminished and weak, he can never rise to power, again, according to Gandalf:

If [the One Ring] is destroyed, then [Sauron] will fall; and his fall will be so low that none can foresee his arising ever again. For he will lose the best part of his strength that was native to him in his beginning, and all that made or begun with that power will crumble, and he will be maimed for ever, becoming a mere spirit of malice that gnaws itself in the shadows, but cannot again grow or take shape. And so a great evil of this world will be removed.  

However, this is not as simple. Sauron/Mairon is an immortal spirit by definition. He can’t never truly die, since he’s one of the spiritual forces that first helped shaped the world in the Ainulindalë (the Music of the Ainur), and no soul can be annihilated or reduced to zero (non-existent) in Tolkien legendarium.  

Sauron/Mairon’s whereabouts and fate after the dawn of Fourth Age are unaccounted for, because Tolkien didn’t get the chance to finish his story. We, truly, don’t know where he went, if we stayed on Middle-earth, or to the Undying Lands of Valinor (to finally face the judgement of the Valar for his crimes), because he could go whenever he wanted in Arda, really.  

One theory is that Manwë, the King of the Valar, might have come to Mordor to capture Sauron after the One ring is destroyed, based on this description from “Return of the King”: 

And as the Captain gazed south to the Land of Mordor, it seemed to them that, black against the pall of cloud, there rose a huge shape of shadow, impenetrable, lightning-crowned, filling all the sky. Enormous it reared above the world, and stretched out towards them a vast threatening hand, terrible but impotent [Sauron’s spirit]: for even as it leaned over them, a great wind took it, and it was all blown away, and passed, then a hush fell.” 

Basically this scene but a “great wind” carries away that shadow

Manwë is the one with the power over air and winds, and when Sauron repented the first time (after Morgoth’s defeat), he went to Eönwë, the herald of Manwë, to beg forgiveness for his past crimes. His fellow Maia told him that he couldn't be the one to grant him pardon, because that’s above his station, and he needs to face trial before the Valar, namely from Manwë.

Since we know that Sauron’s pride prevented him from doing this, it would actually make sense for Manwë himself to capture Sauron after his defeat, bringing him to Valinor.

When Thangorodrim was broken and Morgoth overthrown, Sauron put on his fair hue again and did obeisance to Eönwë, the herald of Manwë, and abjured all his evil deeds. And some hold that this was not at first falsely done, but that Sauron in truth repented, if only out of fear, being dismayed by the fall of Morgoth and the great wrath of the Lords of the West. But it was not within the power of Eönwë to pardon those of his own order, and he commanded Sauron to return to Aman and there receive the judgment of Manwë. Then Sauron was ashamed, and he was unwilling to return in humiliation and to receive from the Valar a sentence, in might be, of long servitude in proof of his good faith; for under Morgoth his power had been great. Therefore when Eönwë departed he hid himself in Middle-Earth; and he fell back into evil, for the bonds that Morgoth had laid upon him were very strong. The Silmarillion

Many use Gandalf’s quote as “proof” that Sauron remained on Middle-earth like a shadow of malice, or a ghost. However, Tolkien made the distinction between himself and what his characters say, in Letter 153: “There is, to me, a wide gulf between the two statements, so wide that Treebeard's statement could (in my world) have possibly been true [...] Treebeard is a character in my story, not me; and though he has a great memory and some earthy wisdom, he is not one of the Wise, and there is quite a lot he does not know or understand.”

Gandalf is wise, indeed, but he’s not of the same rank as the Valar (he’s a servant to them), nor he, like Eönwë, has either the power or the permission to pass sentences on other Maiar’s fates. Which means, his quote is his own opinion on the subject, and not actual "canon" on what happened to Sauron after the One was destroyed.

For the sake of argument, let’s assume Manwë captured Sauron: was he sent to the Void like his former master, Morgoth?

Based on The Silmarillion it could appear that way: 

Among those of his servants that have names the greatest was that spirit whom the Eldar called Sauron, or Gorthaur the Cruel. In his beginning he was of the Maia of Aulë, and he remained mighty in the lore of that people. In all the deeds of Melkor the Morgoth upon Arda, in his vast workds and in the deceits of his cunning, Sauron had a part, and was only less evil than his master in that for long he served another and not himself. But in after years he rose like a shadow of Morgoth and a ghost of his malice, and walked behind him on the same ruinous path down into the Void.  

However, this, again, is not that simple, because The Silmarillion was not only published by Christopher Tolkien, and it contains elements outdated and reviewed by Tolkien himself, but it’s also a tale written by the Eldar, and it contains “opinions” and “facts” from which the Eldar themselves had little knowledge about (namely everything that’s connected to the Maiar and the Valar).

This means, not everything that’s in The Silmarillion is true or actually happened (canon): it’s like “Fire & Blood” by George R.R. Martin, a collection of facts, opinions, gossip, myths, etc. written by the Elves. The truth is in Tolkien’s essays and letters, really. And this is why “Rings of Power” can afford to play with the events of this book. 

Tolkien did confirm, in his Letter 297, that Morgoth was overthrown and extruded from the World (the physical universe). But his crimes were far worse than Sauron's:

the Diabolus Morgoth did, and started making things 'for himself, to be their Lord', these would then 'be', even if Morgoth broke the supreme ban against making other 'rational' creatures like Elves or Men. They would at least 'be' real physical realities in the physical world, however evil they might prove, even 'mocking' the Children of God. They would be Morgoth's greatest Sins, abuses of his highest privilege. Tolkien, Letter 153

Morgoth is a Vala (God/archangel), and he did not only corrupted Elves into Orcs, but also Maiar (angels) into Balrogs and other servants of his (demons), including Mairon himself. Mairon, like all the other Maiar (including the fallen ones), was created by Eru, but got corrupted by Morgoth, which means, the way Eru sees him is key. Does he sees Mairon as "equal" to Morgoth, or as victim of Morgoth's corruption? Food for thought. Because if he's just a victim, the Void isn't his fate.

A lot of fans in the Tolkien fandom have the headcanon that the immortal servants of Morgoth were sent to the Void, alongside him, but Tolkien never wrote about this, and their fates are a mystery. I might be mistaken here, but I think only Ungoliant’s fate is mentioned in the legendarium, and very enigmatic, too: went to the forgotten south of the world before the (first) rising of the Sun, and there disappeared from history.

Then, we have the fact that Satan/Lucifer is Melkor/Morgoth because he’s the one who corrupts God’s creation and he’s the symbolic archangel (like Lucifer was). Him being dragged in chains and imprisoned until the end of time, also parallels a biblical event.

Sauron is a satanist, a follower of Satan/Morgoth. Tolkien also makes this distinction in his letters: Satanic rebellion and evil of Morgoth and his satellite Sauron; in which Evil is largely incarnate, and in which physical resistance to it is a major act of loyalty to God (Letter 156). Tolkien also calls Sauron "a reincarnation of Evil"; that "evil" being Morgoth (diabolus).

Sauron’s crimes 

His biggest crimes in Tolkien legendarium aren’t the forging of the One ring, nor the whole “rings of power” project to enslave the Free people’s of Middle-earth, nor even the Fall of Númenor. Because, as Tolkien, told us: “in The Lord of the Rings the conflict is not basically about 'freedom', though that is naturally involved. It is about God, and His sole right to divine honour” (Letter 183).

Sauron’s biggest sins in Tolkien lore are:

Pride

Idolatry (worship of false gods): Thou shall have no other Gods before me. Mairon turned his back on Eru (God) to serve Morgoth (Devil), and this act of treason is a crime against Eru himself;

Rebellion: against Eru’s authority, by siding with Morgoth;

Heresy: he forsake his worship of Eru (his creator) for Morgoth; and also converted many Númenoreans to his Morgoth cult, in the hopes of angering the Valar enough to destroy Númenor;

Blasphemy: he cut down Nimloth, the White Tree of Númenor, a symbol of the Faithful, and in its place raised a great Temple devoted to Morgoth in which human sacrifices were performed to asks for immortality, and persecuted the Faithful;

Usurpation of God’s authority: self-proclaim God. That’s why he’s called “shadow of Morgoth”; because Sauron is a mere Maia, a servant to a God, not an actual God.

Would any of these sins sent Sauron into the Void with his former master? Again, it would depend on how Eru judges him, really.

The Void is quite a mysterious place in the legendarium; it’s located outside Time and Space, it’s the absence of the Secret Fire of Eru (“the Flame Imperishable”), his power of Creation. We only know that Morgoth was imprisoned there, and set free at the end of time.

Eru already punished Sauron once, by removing his ability to take on physical form after the Fall of Númenor; and after the One ring was destroyed, Sauron himself is little more than a shadow of his former self, his spirit severely diminished, powerless, and unable to cause any damage, at all. That’s his punishment, already.

But in order to get any redemption, that choice would have to come from Mairon. He would have to truly and honestly repent for all of sins (confession), starting by forsaken Morgoth and recognizing Eru as his one true God, and, then, fulfill a fitting penitence for his crimes. We are talking about an immortal spirit here, this process can take thousands of years or even millenniums.   

[copperbadge]

I was making breakfast and listening to an episode of Just King Things this morning, which is a podcast I do recommend -- two very smart English teachers are reading the books of Stephen King in publication order and discussing them. This could go extremely awry except they're both highly conscious of his failings as well as his skill, so they do really well handling a lot of his less salutatory content.

They've hit the point in King's ouvre (this episode was about Hearts In Atlantis) that follows his recovery from the car accident that very nearly killed him, where he was struck by a van while out walking. One of them pointed out that it seems as though he came back from nearly dying determined to write the wildest shit imaginable and only write what he wanted, which struck a chord in me this time despite having listened to this episode before. Perhaps because I was thinking about my own writing and where it's going in the short term (there are a couple of short stories I want to do that I don't quite have a way into yet). I generally don't think about the drift of my creativity in the long term because when I do I usually draw the wrong conclusions.

I don't really classify my life, the way some people who've had high-impact injuries do, as before-TBI and after-TBI (Traumatic Brain Injury -- the fairly severe concussion I had in January of 2020). For one thing, given I had to cancel a trip to NYC because of it, it may have saved my life; I almost certainly would have caught COVID as someone with known lung issues in New York at the time. For another, the TBI was way scarier to almost everyone else; for me it was just one more dumb injury I gave myself and I didn't even remember most of it so it hardly registered. I used to open the story of it with a joke about waking up not remembering going to bed the night before, but nobody ever found it funny.

It's true that there are changes it wrought in my life, though. Even practical stuff like making sure my living space doesn't have tripping hazards and continuing to wear a fitbit even though I don't really need to (the fitbit told us, the morning after, exactly when the concussion happened, because it registered a heart-rate spike when I fell). For weeks after, I had to move slowly and put off making important decisions because I couldn't trust my physical or intellectual judgement; I didn't even jaywalk in my own neighborhood because I couldn't be sure I was judging the cars' speeds properly. For about a year after I had periodic post-concussion syndrome which basically just slammed me back into concussion space, which wasn't painful or upsetting but was definitely inconvenient.

And it's also undeniable that my writing shifted after the injury. It's not necessarily because of the injury, since my initial recovery from the TBI and the declaration of quarantine happened at roughly the same time, and anyone who tells you that a years-long global pandemic didn't impact their artistic expression is selling you a line. But the last thing I wrote before the TBI was the first draft of Six Harvests, and aside from the Six Harvests publication draft, which had fairly minimal changes, almost all that I've written has been blue-sky, light-hearted, PG-rated romance. It's been on my mind that I've been writing different subject matter from what I used to, but the timing of it didn't strike me until just recently.

I don't mind, really. I love fandom and I support fanfic in whatever expression it comes, but I'm also happy writing my own stories. While I'm aware it's been years since I've meaningfully written fanfic, it doesn't bother me per se, as long as I'm writing. It bothered me much more when I could write fanfic but not original fic, especially in those last few awful months at my last job. I'm proud of the literary and non-genre fiction I've written in the past, but it's also much more trying and frustrating to write at times, so I'm enjoying having a different sort of challenge that feels more fulfilling in the process. I'm sure at some point I'll go back to literary fiction -- there are ways in which it's hard to avoid turning the later Shivadh novels into literary fiction, being honest -- but for now I like what I'm writing, and I'm writing primarily to please myself and without regard to what's necessarily rational or linear.

Just struck me, is all, that it's by far the most noticeable major shift in my work. I do sort of wonder what will be next.

[dr-futbol-blog]

Sanctuary, Pt. 17

Sheppard asks McKay what "the hell" he's talking about, and he still doesn't sound angry or even annoyed at him. He sounds like he accepts what McKay is saying even though he doesn't understand what that is; he sounds honestly confused.

If Sheppard is annoyed at anything here, it's the fact that McKay seems to be ignoring him now, talking directly to her like he's not there, like he's not hearing him because he's so focused on her. And McKay does sound impassioned. There is such desperate yearning in his voice as he pleads for her to give them the truth: "I just don't understand the act. I mean, you must know we'd give just about anything to talk to you, to learn from you. I mean, what is it? What, are you… checking us out?"

McKay may just have told him that there's a real live Ancient sitting next to him but Sheppard's attention is not entirely on her. Yes, he's watching her, does not know what he's looking at. She's not who he thought her to be. But his attention is on McKay. McKay's attention may be entirely on her, but his sure isn't. Without any conscious thought, his head is following the sound of his voice.

She admits that it's true: "I am what you call an "Ancient"… And it is also true that I can never offer your people sanctuary… But you are wrong as to why I came here."

Sheppard is not happy to hear that she cannot give them sanctuary and it appears as though she had never even intended to do so. While both Weir and McKay himself are surprised that he was actually right about this, it doesn't surprise Sheppard. As stated before, it was never that he didn't believe McKay or trust his judgement. Even here, he seems to accept McKay's reading of the situation as is, even when he doesn't fully understand it.

He just doesn't know what to make of it.

While Chaya admits that she is an Ancient, she also says explicitly that she thinks McKay is wrong--about why she came. And it's only then that Sheppard engages her. For the past several moments he had only been talking to McKay but it's, again, his need to defend McKay that gets him to return his attention to her. He asks her why, then. If McKay is wrong, which he usually is not and very obviously hadn't been wrong about her at all here, why then had she come.

Note Sheppard's surprise at her answer. What ever he had thought her motivation had been to come to Atlantis, despite trying very hard to charm her to get her to help them, to grant them sanctuary on her planet, having the hots for him was not among those reasons. He is genuinely baffled by this. Note also that he says "This was never about, uh..." She has just confessed that she came to Atlantis for John, to get closer to him. What ever Sheppard thought that she had come for, that was not it. It was clearly something else. He thought that she had come for some other reason.

And while Sheppard seems initially surprised by this, it quickly turns to bewilderment. If she had such a wrong idea of what he had intended, he feels like he owes her an explanation and possibly an apology. He had not been meaning to lead her on, and sure, in retrospect it all looks really suspect, but his own motivations had been pure and noble to start with. He had people to save, people to keep safe, people he had personally endangered and to whom he owed sanctuary that he had convinced himself they could get from her. But, like. McKay might think he's Kirk all day long but romancing the alien priestess, let alone an Ancient, had never been the goal, merely a means to an end.

He feels like he needs to explain this to her, owes her an explanation for his behaviour.

Notice how, when Sheppard asks whether they can have a moment to themselves, he's asking McKay. Not Weir. Not the room in general. He is asking McKay whether he is okay with him spending a moment alone with her to explain himself.

He looks at McKay with his finger up in the air, looks to the side (possibly recalling a specific memory), then looks back at McKay apparently having had his entire body turned toward him during this, and only then turns back to the rest of the room. The entire question, "Could we just have a moment to ourselves here?" was spoken to McKay.

That's really interesting.

Why does he want or need McKay's permission to talk to her in private? Why is McKay apparently ready to get up from his seat and leave them alone immediately upon being asked by him? It also does not appear as though he was in on the chorus of "No!" from Weir and Teyla. Sheppard, giving him his full attention like that, pleading him. McKay would have done just about anything Sheppard asked for like that. That, Sheppard looking at him, giving him his attention, acknowledging the connection between them, that's all he wanted.

Most people will assume that Sheppard wanted a moment alone with her so that they could discuss their feelings. It seems like that's what the people gathered around the table thought, as well. But that's probably the last thing Sheppard had actually intended to talk about. He's not good at talking about feelings even if it was something he wanted to do and considering the hysterical reaction he had to the topic ("I can feel it..") the previous evening, we can safely conclude that feelings--whether hers or his own--were not what he had in mind to discuss.

The thing is, John Sheppard doesn't like the Ancients. I mean, he really doesn't like them. In Tao of Rodney (S03E14), he tells us how he really feels about them:

Sheppard: Look, we all agree the Ancients were pretty screwed up. Weir: We do? Sheppard: All the ones I met were arrogant and condescending, and not for good reason. They made giant mistakes and never fixed them.

All the ones he has met. This very much includes Chaya Sar. In fact, she's the first Ancient he ever did meet.

Note also that he is contrasting this to Rodney. McKay is arrogant and condescending, but for a reason (by this time, Sheppard actually knows that it's for reasons; note also that while he absolutely acknowledges that McKay is arrogant [in The Shrine (S05E06): "I know that sounds... arrogant, is that right?" -- "Yeah, that works."], it doesn't make him love McKay any less. It's just a facet of who he is). McKay has also made giant mistakes--huge, honking mistakes that Sheppard has been there to witness real close--but he has always tried to fix them when he's messed up. Always. Not only that but McKay has had to fix many mistakes made by the Ancients, and he has always gone in to fix them with everything he's got. Sheppard contrasts the Ancients with McKay here, and he would choose McKay every day of the week.

Sheppard doesn't like the Ancients. He also doesn't really care about them, as we learn in the The Return (S03E10):

Woolsey: From their point of view, Doctor McKay, they're being extremely generous. Keep in mind that when they left Atlantis, we were basically a hunter-gatherer species. McKay: Well, did you remind them that if we hadn't hunted and gathered them out of the void between galaxies, they would still be stuck there? Sheppard: We should have left them out there.

Sheppard really doesn't like the Ancients. One could even say that he holds some animosity toward them, as seen in Progeny (S03E05):

It's kind of like he holds every Ancient personally responsible for everything that has happened in Pegasus for the past 10,000 years, and is ready to throw hands about that. They had the power and technology to do something about it and instead they chose to run away, abandon every human under their protection.

McKay is the one that admires the Ancients, who wants to learn about them and from them, who's looking at them for answers. It's McKay that is desperately wanting to connect with her, here. Not because he's attracted to her but because he thinks that she's the key to protecting them, keeping them safe. Keeping Sheppard safe.

McKay makes to get up as Sheppard asks for a moment but sits back down at the emphatic no from the women. Chaya stands up instead, intending to leave.

Even as she goes, Sheppard does not watch her leave. When she leaves, he actually turns to look at McKay, they exchange a glance. Then he gives Weir a look that says he's still blaming her for all of this.

What's also interesting is that when Sheppard follows her out of the meeting room, what he actually says to her is him continuing to argue McKay's case for him: "Come on, Chaya! You and your people were the reason we came here in the first place." He went after her not to speak to her about his feelings but to tell her why McKay is right. His tone is also not someone pleading for the light of their life to stay but he actually sounds combative as he takes after her.

And the way Sheppard walks after her, he was prepared to argue. He was going after her to have words. But he doesn't have time to argue it with her as she faints, and he catches her.

But McKay doesn't know this. As Sheppard leaves, he seems to need to touch something. He holds out his hand, pauses for a moment, and then presses it against his laptop. His trusted laptop, the thing that has been closest to him most of his adult life. But that's not what he wanted to be touching, clearly. He watches Sheppard go, just like Sheppard watched him go back on the planet. Sheppard asked him to have a moment alone with her, and that's what he is going let him have.

It seems that Chaya is sensing that the wraith are preparing to attack Proculus. Again, I'll draw your attention to the fact that Sheppard's reaction to a beautiful woman fainting in his arms is not concern or even worry, it's anger:

Sheppard: What the hell was that? Chaya: They're coming for them. I should have never left them. Sheppard: What's going on? Chaya: I'm sorry, John.

He's loud enough to have alerted the others still in the meeting room who come out to see what's going on.

Touch has been important in this episode as we've seen many things communicated through it, possibly even used as a plot point. Whether Sheppard was mind-controlled out in the balcony or being seduced by natural wiles, as he interpreted it later in his mission report, this is the only time he touches Chaya out of his own volition:

It is not a friendly touch. He is very angry with her, demanding answers. This touch is meant to keep her from leaving, which is what she so obviously purports to do. Out there, Sheppard told her that he wasn't going anywhere because it's what he longed to hear. But it seems now that she never had any intention of staying. She says to herself, "I should have never left them!" emphasizing the fact that leaving and staying are central concepts for this episode--for Sheppard's character in general.

She turns into a being of pure energy, takes control of their gate and leaves. This time he watches her leave, they all do.

He tells Weir that he's taking a jumper to find out what happened, and takes off. He doesn't ask McKay or Teyla to accompany him. They don't offer. They all assume that there's some unfinished business there that he needs to take care of alone.

But McKay watches him leave. Takes a few steps after him. He wants to go. He doesn't offer because Sheppard just told him, and specifically him, that he needed a moment alone with her. But he very much wants to go with Sheppard. To be there for him. To be there with him.

Concluded in Pt. 18

[lionheartedmusings]

with mousey and bad together on the server, there's been a lot of talking about her as satan (it's been clarified by mousey that all she remembers is that she's a demon from hell) and her as bad's boss, and i wanted to do a bit of a deep dive on bad's demon lore through both a "pop culture" view and a more traditional biblical view.

in pop culture we've had a lot of mixing up of demon lore in general, with the prevalent idea that demons are creations of hell, and not all of them necessarily fallen angels or previously heavenly beings — it's a perfectly valid analysis, but i'm firmly convinced that bad's character is not just any demon, but instead very much a powerful demon that was once an angel.

let's start with what we do know of q!bad's personal history and slot things into their proper place. we know he's around 11600 years old (making his "date of birth" somewhere around 9577 BC. we also know he arrived in this world (which in this case we have to assume is whichever dimension qsmp is held in) in 9600 BC which means he lived the majority of his life away from his home — he was barely 23 when he "moved".

we also know that he didn't come to this dimension willingly, that he was summoned and in that summoning he caused serious destruction — it's been made pretty apparent that the man sunk atlantis, and frankly there's still a question as to whether he did it on accident or not, or the reason why he keeps it hidden. according to bonnie the horse, he sent them a lot of "salty souls" once, and bonnie has also dubbed bad "death of the sea". it doesn't matter whether bad is hiding because what he did made him famous, or because he feels terrible — what matters here is that one singular demon was able to cause the destruction and sinking of a whole civilization singlehandedly. he was also able to do it at a pretty young age.

we also know that bad has eaten souls before (as well as anything he can get in his mouth, apparently), that he's got a way to avoid being summoned (as he told dapper he'd let him know later) and that for better or for worse, he's immortal. so, it's safe to say that bad is an extremely powerful being that cannot be killed by any means, and who has enough control over himself to not only hide his true nature but also contain himself to the highest degree.

speaking of death, bad's relationship with it is very interesting on a few levels. we know he's employed as a grim reaper (and that being a grim reaper is completely removed from his origins, it's just a job) and that to one degree or another, he's acknowledged mumza as the goddess of death as being canonical to him as well (yesterday tallulah spoke about death as a beautiful woman, and bad confirmed to chat she meant mumza).

but what is a grim reaper?

traditionally, grim reapers (or those who served their role) were nothing more than physical manifestations of death with the purpose of easing humans from one plane into the next. they're friendly and kind, and historically for the longest time (up until the middle ages and the plague) they were positive figures, reminiscent at many times of angels.

now, onto angels. angels biblically are far from the cherubic vision we see most often — they're whatever they're needed for. they can be kind-hearted messengers, but they're also warriors and if need be, and they can be incredibly dangerous to humans. why did some fall? simple enough, they sinned. there are passages in the bible regarding the fall of angels and they're described as losing the war in heaven, being cast down with "satan" (while satan and lucifer are not entirely interchangeable and they're often considered two different people, biblically today they're presumed to be the same so let's just roll with it for now) into hell. other passages speak of angels who sinned against god and who await judgement in hell.

but what does any of this have to do with badboyhalo, you ask? well… more than it seems at first if you put it all together. on a basic level, bad wouldn't be considered your average demon — yes, he's full of mischief, has an odd moral compass, and can be incredibly violent, but he's also very kind, and very gentle, and very very loving. there are contradictions in his personality that could be discounted as meta… but the evidence continues to pile up. bad is full of angel iconography, from the actual halo in his name and in his preferred design, but his new build in his home is really beating us over the head with it — he build two statues that can only be described as holy warriors, dark and demon-y but with a golden halo and beautiful white wings.

then, there's "the chair". which is not a chair, it's very much a throne, but for whatever reason bad seems vehemently opposed to admitting that it is, in fact, a throne — it's huge, and full of dark and red blocks, fire… and behind it? huge angel wings. now, one could argue that they're bones, but there are details in the blocks that very clearly allude to feathers — the idea of white feathery wings is a direct parallel to angels, and i think it's very intentional.

who, then, is badboyhalo? i'd put my money on his personal lore being connected to the demonology idea of "the princes of hell" — angels who fell from the grace of god, and took up their kingdoms in hell. i'm fully convinced that bad is a prince of hell. now, which one? that's trickier, and not something we know enough to real pinpoint, especially when you consider that the identity of the princes of hell is pretty fluid — there's a lot of different texts who name different demons, so i'm choosing to simplify it until we get more information.

tl;dr - badboyhalo is not just any ol' demon, but a fallen angel — one of the "princes of hell".

a special thanks to @comradeboyhalo because this post was very handy!

[magnetic-regent-magneto]

GREAT MAGNETO PROMPT MASTERPOST (includes Music, Theme, Verse and Place Prompts)

↪     MUSIC 𝑷𝑹𝑶𝑴𝑷𝑻𝑺 ,

PLOT BASED ON A SONG

↪     THEME/ERA 𝑷𝑹𝑶𝑴𝑷𝑻𝑺 ,

Plots based on a Magneto-related theme, verse or era. Plot Roulette for quick access. Add (*your muse/my muse*) for adjustments -- updated 24.06.24

001. Spionage Era .

002. Acolyte Uprising .

003. AnarchyX Revolution .

004. Future of X-Men Blue .

005. Asteroid M's Final Stand .

006. Savage Land Philosophies .

007. The White King of the Hellfire Club .

008. Brotherhood Noir .

009. Dark Fantasy .

010. Apple of Krakoa .

011. Elden Ring/Lords of the Fallen .

012. League of Legends .

013. Kree and Shi'ar War of Kings .

014. War of Arrako .

015. Peace of Arrako .

016. Resurrection on Krakoa .

017. Political Intrigue of Krakoa .

018. Legacy Virus .

019. Mothervine .

020. Mysterium Metal .

021. Secret Wars with Avengers .

022. Headmaster Magneto .

023. Magneto Protocols .

024. X of Swords .

025. Civilisation on Saturn .

026. Chimera Plots .

027. Chimera Magneto .

028. Quiet Council Secrets .

029. Uprising .

030. Paradise Genosha .

031. Ruins of Genosha .

032. Lives of Moira X .

033. Black Vault .

034. Machine Forge .

035. Expedition .

036. Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse .

037. Cosmic Cerebro .

038. Mutant Purge .

039. Broken Magnet .

040. Black Ops .

041. Game of Thrones .

042. Legacy of M .

043. Avalon Sanctuary .

044. Terrorist .

045. Brotherhood .

046. Morlocks .

047. Anomaly .

048. Riddled Alliance .

049. Civil War .

050. Lost .

051. Celebrations .

052. Studies .

053. Rebirth .

054. Family .

055. Rise of Magneto .

056. Cosmic Event .

057. Reforming Mars .

058. Living Earth .

059. Reluctant King .

060. Betrayal .

061. Corruption .

062. Imprisoned .

063. Sacrifice .

064. Infiltration .

065. Annihilation .

066. Negotiation .

067. Survival .

068. Experiment .

069. Invasion .

070. Art .

071. Judgement .

072. Banishment .

073. Assassination .

074. Forgiveness .

075. Eclipse .

076. Quantum Electromagnetism .

077. Heart of a Star .

078. Nimrod .

079. Resonance Chamber .

080. Control (Game) .

081. Blackest Night .

082. Destruction of London .

083. Boss Fight .

084. Series 97 .

085. Golden Tracks AU .

↪     PLACE 𝑷𝑹𝑶𝑴𝑷𝑻𝑺 ,

001. Genosha .

002. Asteroid M .

003. Savage Lands .

004. Island M .

005. Wundagore Mountain .

006. Poland .

007. Berlin .

008. Krakoa .

009. New York .

010. Madripoor .

011. Dark Dimension .

012. Limbo .

013. Mars .

009. New York .

010. Madripoor .

011. Dark Dimension .

012. Limbo .

013. Latveria .

014. Underground Cities .

015. Atlantis .

016. Morlock Tunnels .

017. Xavier Institute .

018. Avalon .

019. Muir Island .

020. Research Facility .

021. Museum .

022. Astral Plane .

023. Bermuda Triangle .

018. Mojoverse .

019. Vault .

020. Jungle .

021. Phalanx .

022. Saturn .

023. Space .

018. Outerspace .

019. Eternals .

020. Avengers Tower .

021. Study .

022. Quantum World .

023. Hellfire Club .

024. Apocalypse .

025. Titan .

026. Hell .

[a-den-of-demons]

New Muses

I like introducing one at a time, but here are three new Muses for you guys to have fun with~.

Katara (ATLA)- Personality: Firey, Compassionate, Judgemental; Switch

Height: 5'6"

Cup Size: DD Cup

Kinks: Loves Foreplay, Dancing, Anal Sex

Forms: Human Water Mage

Princess Jasmine (Aladdin)- Personality: Independent, Stubborn, Intelligent; Sub

Height: 5'4"

Bust Size: E Cup

Kinks: Hair pulling, Older men, Stripping

Forms: Vampire, Human Hunter

Queen Kida (Atlantis)- Personality: Curious, Strong-willed, Loyal; Switch

Height: 6'1"

Cup Size: DD Cup

Kinks: Brutal Sex, Spanking, Masochist

Forms: Human Hunter, Angel-kin

[perfectionistkilling-me]

Best Rogue Amendiares Quotes because I can.

"Its not about the colour or the max firepower, I want what I ordered" "its not about firepower, there are ways and people who know them. Or who can at least improvised on a theme."

"Fuck Stealth, I always hated stealth anyway" "I don't know Johnny, we were young. Hot blood in our veins, shit judgement in our heads, like all pups." "That's what I love about night city. One day you're in the gutter, next day you got the whole city at your feet." "I look my cut up front honey, but i guess I'm touched by your concern."

"There is nothing I hate more than losing good people to plain stupidity." "We all pay a price for the choices we make, I'm no exception. That's what I tell myself when i stand over the graves of the crew of the Atlantis. It's what I tell myself when I look at you now." And as a bonus "Shut the fuck up Johnny."

[dumuzithemessiah]

Lumarian Sky Islands + truth isn’t pretty

The word Lumarian comes from the Nibirian word for moons in general which is “Luma” so Lumarian is what we call those sky islands though Mu and Atlantis are underwater so even though they are part of the sky islands they are underwater!

But the islands I remember the names are:

Laputa

Mu

Dorado

Kamelot

Ys

Atlantis

Kumari

Avalon

Kitezh

Otuken

Vineta

Shamballa 

Lyon

Antillia

Ehdenia

Eternia

Thank the gods and goddesses I have them written down in my notes as yeah those are the names of the Lumarian Sky Islands!

Most of the sky islands have ever have been inhabited by humans either except for Kamelot and Avalon people have set foot on during ancient times!

Many mythical places took their names and used them for fictional places but the Lumarian Sky Islands do indeed exist and are probably possibly unintentional for all those plane crashes and super natural occurrences in the Dragon’s Triangle and Bermuda Triangle!

Some of them are near Antartica too! Although Kamelot is near Germany it is always Winter on the sky island thus is always cold there!

But all sky islands are inhabited by Nibirian species both advanced and non advanced like Nibimon which are Pokemon like Nibiriam wildlife!

But yeah I don’t know if those accidents and super natural occurrences in those areas are intentional or unintentional as one reason is to keep humans out would be one reason for such to occur as humans would likely attack a Nibirian uncalled for as humans fear those different from them especially those different like other advanced species!

That’s why yazata like me are in vessels as humans would attack us on site! Humans would also hatefully and cowardly cry for their violent military to attack us which we would be able to destroy their military sure but we have to wait till J-Day to show ourselves!

After all you’d have to be really dumb to think a yazata aka a god or goddess in case of females wouldn’t be able to take on the military as guess what? We��re deities. We can destroy any mortal with ease.

All other advanced species are lucky we are on the side of good considering how powerful we really are…

So in order for us to keep safe we have to be in a vessel until J-Day…

It’s painful too as I want to stop the bad/evil but I have to wait till J-Day do so…

Obviously J-Day means Judgement Day and humanity refuses to change for the better so they’re getting the “Big E” aka “Big Extinction” but as a yazata of course I wish it were different as we deities care about others and work to keep peace…

….But alas this is war and war isn’t a happy thing….war is a terrible thing….

So we have to do what we have to do to protect the Kosmos, Universe, Yumera, Kohora, and the Multiverse…

When I made the original Kosmos and First Universe I just wanted to be surrounded by loved ones both family and friends…. I never wanted war….

I just want to be with my family… to be with my husband Marduk… to be with my demon friends… to be with my own kind…

As the real Messiah I am the “Rainbow Hero” as it actually means and I have to fight Ishtayr on Judgement Day…

So I am already am in pain right now but I have to fight when I get back in my real body….

I don’t have much to look forward to…

Except healing after the final day of the Helveon War…

Instead of hating me for being the real Messiah and crying how that meant you humans worshipped a lie you should’ve felt sorry for me for being suffering so much in my life….

You humans have no right to tell anyone on who they are… I am who I really am and that is Dumuzi the real Messiah…

And if you read my posts on here you’d know how much I’ve suffered…

Messiah means “Rainbow Hero” or “Hero of Rainbows” but my life was never “sunshine and rainbows” as people would phrase it as…

I’ve been through so much kinda of pain… pain I wouldn’t wish on anyone…

As the Messiah I am no “Glorified Hero” that people write heroes as in fiction…

I am more of a “Tragic Hero” if anything…

My soul is like any soul shaped like a heart 💛 but is golden with a rainbow trim around it….

But I have flaws myself as I have anger problems because of what I’ve went through in my life…

So sometimes I lash out at humans because of what humans have done..

Only reason I somewhat look forward to Judgement Day is being reunited with my family and loved ones…

I have mixed feelings about what has to be done to humanity…

As a hero I somewhat look forward to getting revenge against humanity for what they have done….

But the other part of me wishes humanity didn’t worship those lies and had actual morality instead of being all self entitled to things no one is entitled to…

No god or goddess ever claimed to be perfect…

Ishtayr isn’t a true deity as she is evil and she has done nothing but spread war, lies, hate, genocide, etc…

Ishtayr is the reincarnation of The Great Evil Herself and is the true form of evil…

We fought in The First Universe and I used a spell that caused her to die and me and my siblings to be shattered…

Being shattered is the closest thing to death for a deity as we feel like we’re everywhere like a ghost…

Over half a million years I was finally along with my siblings were finally brought back…

During that time I eventually found my true soulmate: Marduk[[His name is pronounced Mar-duke]] and we had kids together…

My children with Marduk: Adadi, Shamash, Utu, Ninrae, Qupit, and Yorupit..

I can’t remember any of my kids names I had with Kosmin which FYI Nibirians don’t have biological incest problems like humans do so certain incest relations are acceptable on Nibiru and all deities are related so it’s impossible to avoid incest as we’re all related and we all can only breed with other deities…

Regardless Marduk and I’s love is true and no one can separate us….

Considering it’s the Eighth Universe as the Kosmos regenerated a few times as that happens every seriously long time period and it is probably what humans call the Big Bang…

That means…. It took that long for me to finally find true love…

I wish I could remember my kids with Kosmin though as I feel terrible getting massive amnesia from being shattered and forgetting them…

My kids with Kosmin would be Gen 2 deities….

All I know is I never had a daughter… but for some reason I feel like after the Helveon War is over that Marduk and I will have one….

So any children the Gen 2 deities had would include daughters likely but all Gen 2 deities are male….

I remember how I was during The First Universe before The Great Evil Herself came….

I was cheerful back then…

Kinda like Sora from Kingdom Hearts despite having no light in me….

I any of you are Kingdom Hearts fans reading this then you’d know how cheerful and positive Sora acts….

The Great Evil Herself attacking Nibiru and trying to destroy me changed me and what her reincarnation Ishtayr did to me is things even you humans would be highly disgusted and horrified by….

Nowadays mostly I feel sad…

I have an actual reason for depression…

I get pissed off sometimes but mostly just I’m feeling weak and sad…

My vessel isn’t great with health so I feel weak and sad most of the time….

I only feel happy temporarily when getting new things….

I just want the war to end….

So I can be happy and be with my loved ones again…

[imperiuswrecked]

hello :) i have very recently gotten into namor comics and i wanted to know, what are your favorite arcs/solos hes had? i hope its not too much of a bother. thank you and i hope youre doing well. ^_^

Hello and welcome. It's always a pleasure to speak with Namor fans ❤️ Thanks for asking, I'm well and I hope you are too.

Series:

King in Black: Namor - It's wonderfully written and gives us great lore and character moments. It's written by Kurt Busiek who really knows the character. The artwork is amazing, drawn by two different artists but I have to point out how much I really enjoy the colorists' work. The way they chose to make present day Namor scenes all muted colors, like the ocean is sick and dying, meanwhile his past scenes has such vibrant color.

Sub-Mariner: The Depths - I'm a big horror fan so this was a perfect combination of horror and Namor. I wish this would someday be adapted into a short animation or live action film. Ribic's art carries the whole comic, you could understand it just by the art alone, tho the writing is great too.

Sub-Mariner (2007) - Honesty I feel this series is criminally under rated, it's one of my favorite modern takes on Namor. I do have a couple of criticisms of the plot/ending but overall this series is favorite, love the artwork, love the premise and Namor's characterization.

The Sub-Mariner (1968) - I'm a big fan of Silver Age Namor and this series has lots of great comics but some do drag on at point. Personal favorites, Namor vs The Thing and Namor meeting Betty again in #8, Dorma being possessed by the Serpent Crown in #9. Gonna stop there before I go digging to find every issue I loved, bc there's just a lot there, like I love Tigershark's introduction/stories and Namor and Diane's friendship, and the quest for Namor's father etc.

Arc's:

Tales to Astonish: The Quest for Neptune's Trident #70-76. (To be fair I do love a lot Tales to Astonish but I'm just trying to pick out arcs that I reread alot.)

Namor goes insane in space: Uncanny X-Men (1963) Annual 3 (2001), Steve Rogers: Super Soldier Annual 1, Namor: The First Mutant Annual 1

Suma-Ket & Artys-Gran Arc - Namor, the Sub-Mariner (1990) #30-40. Dark Undersea High Fantasy arc, love it.

Solo Comics:

Marvel Fanfare (1982) #16 & 43, both these are solo adventures

Marvel Snapshot: Sub-Mariner (2020) - I can never get enough of this comic, told from Betty's pov, its wonderful.

Avengers: Emperor Doom - I love every time Namor and Doom team up or interact but if I had to pick one time it's this.

What if? Sub-Mariner (2011) - Love love this story by Greg Pak of Namor growing up on land.

The Judgement of Namor - Dark Reign: The Cabal - Namor takes court and deals with his subjects. An excellent look into Namor's role as the monarch of Atlantis.

Marvel (2020) #3 - I loved the sketch arts of the comic that was unfinished, it had been around for decades but when Marvel finally printed it in full I was so happy. I still prefer the sketchy art but I thought this was a fun adventure and Namor is in a suit, lol.

Marvel Comics Presents: (1988) #33 - All time favorite Namor comic, #1 spot in my heart. (2007) #7 - Namor mourns Nita's death (2019) #1 - A heavy story by Greg Pak about WWll

Tales of the Marvels: Inner Demons - a look at Namor while he was an amnesiac

I haven't even started on character team up comics or team books and if I start on those I won't stop. lol. I'll put a link here to my 2019 comic reading guide that can help you find most major arcs. I hope you enjoy reading!

[aeoki]

Atlantis - Divine Bridge: Chapter 8

Location: Seisou Hall Theatre Room Characters: Touri, Yuzuru, Eichi & Wataru Season: Winter

Eichi: This is all my guess.

Maybe Lady Z. K. has really come to love idols and simply wants to pursue an earnest education in that aspect.

But it’s dangerous to act based on that optimistic assumption.

We need to be prepared for an external attack. That naturally applies to me, but it does for you as well, as our families are on close terms with one another.

Touri: …………

Eichi: The Z. K. Zaibatsu will most likely not stop until they achieve their goal. I’ll have to negotiate with her and come to an agreement at some point in time.

They’re far too big to ignore.

What will they be given and in exchange, what will we gain? An enjoyable card game where we hide our cards while trying to find out what the other is thinking is about to begin.

Touri: W–Wha…

So this Hashidate person wants to be the student council president as bargaining material?

It’s just one of her strategies to get you to give in?

S–She doesn’t even know what sort of feelings I have as I’m aiming for student council president…

Eichi: Results are everything in this world. You should have understood that a long time ago, right, Touri?

No one will listen to the excuses of a non-achiever.

If she wins the election, then the genuine and earnest wishes you carried in your heart would all have been for naught.

No. That would only be in self-interest, and you would have been nothing but a dull pebble at her feet.

The value of a jewel is only determined with victory. Only the victor can change the pebble that was once a mere mineral into a shiny and high-priced jewel.

At the very least, that’s the conclusion the world has come to. The ones who write history will always be the victors, and they are the ones who are commended as legitimate, virtuous and beautiful.

Touri: I… I don’t want that.

I don’t want to lose to someone like that.

Eichi: Right. So win, Touri.

Use whatever you need to win.

Similar obstacles will appear in front of you time and time again.

No one can remove them from your path – not even I, Yuzuru, nor your parents.

It’s up to you whether you demolish the rock, jump over it, take a detour or hire someone to remove it…

But you must be the one to make that judgement.

If you’ll act like a child and complain, saying that it’s impossible for you to accomplish, then…

It’s unfortunate, but that would mean you don’t have the right to work with me.

Touri: …………

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ< The next day. The shopping district near Yumenosaki Academy – after school. >

Yuzuru: (There must have been better ways of phrasing that.)

(The poor Young Master. He left, utterly disheartened.)

(After all, it was Eichi-sama, the one he depended on the most, who hit it where it ultimately hurt.)

(He frantically mustered the courage to walk on the tightrope only to discover the rope had been cut by the one he loves. That’s what it felt like.)

(It truly is depressing.)

(But Yuzuru believes in you, Young Master.)

(I believe you can surely overcome this obstacle.)

(If he were to be defeated with something of this calibre, then he would have never made it this far.)

(He truly appears rather pathetic at the moment, disheartened and all, but he’s a child that’s strong-willed at heart – he will surely be back on his feet in no time…)

(No. It is my role as one who serves him to help him face his obstacle, provide support and teach him how to break through it.)

(To do that, I should first look into our enemy, Z. K. Amano Hashidate. Know your enemy and you shall not fear a hundred battles, after all.)

(They are still a zaibatsu despite having moved overseas, so my parents who have served noble dignitaries from long ago should know something.)

(Servants have always loved rumours surrounding their “masters” since times of old.)

(If the Z. K. Zaibatsu is making a move, then perhaps either my parents or the other servants may have heard something…)

…Oh, please give me a bottle of that so-called oxygenated drinking water.

No, they’re gifts for my parents. Yes, please wrap them if you’re able to.

Pardon? Something nicer like snacks would make a much better gift, you say?

I suppose the general public would agree, but my family is a bit different…

They prefer health products, which only god knows are actually effective or not, as opposed to things that give off a smell or sweets that can have adverse effects on the body.

Yes. Thanks to them, I am now quite the healthy child. I have grown to be quite fit and sturdy – enough to survive a military facility if I were ever thrown into one with ease. Hehehe.

Oh, would you be able to wrap up the snacks as well?

With a gorgeous set of wrapping paper, please. Yes, I thought I should bring a gift out of respect to the master of my household.

Yes. It would be lovely if you could wrap it up nicely… Hm?

Wataru: ………♪

Yuzuru: (......? I just saw a flutter of silver hair in the corner of my eye. Was that Hibiki-sama?)

(He’s walking around while erasing his presence – how rare. He usually stands out like a sore thumb…)

(Hmm? He graduated some time ago so what is he doing near Yumenosaki Academy?)

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ← Previous Chapter ᠂ ⚘ ˚⊹˚ ⚘ ᠂  Next Chapter →

[dr-futbol-blog]

Runner, Pt. 4

We don't get to see the full gamut of McKay's reaction to the realization that they have lost contact with Sheppard and have no idea what has happened to him. We next join McKay and Lorne inside the puddle jumper, and the fact that it's daylight indicates that some time has passed. They are in radio contact with Atlantis, informing Weir of the situation. Lorne seems to have calmed down some, and being able to get instructions from a superior on Atlantis likely helped with that.

For his part, McKay seems perfectly normal. Like nothing is amiss. Later, McKay mentions that Ford is showing signs of clinical dissociation. The fact that he even knows what it is seems to confirm his long history of therapy, and that he may have some personal experience with dissociation, as it is an extremely common defense mechanism for multiple forms of childhood trauma. For example, McKay most definitely seems to use his work to avoid facing difficult emotions. Now, unlike what he later tells Ford, "talking in the third person" is not a sign of dissociation. Experiencing a traumatic event and having no feelings about it is. Emotional numbness. Behaving in an uncharacteristic way. What we see McKay doing here are all signs of dissociation.

McKay walks in on Lorne's call to Atlantis and makes a request for radiation suits--which is not unreasonable on a planet with nearly lethal levels of radiation (in fact, we see the effects of the radiation on Ford, who is protected by the wraith enzyme and we see Ronon apply some kind of protection on his skin). While Sheppard's attitude toward McKay was being contrarian, it was never that he didn't believe McKay.

But Lorne, who seems to have adopted Sheppard's attitude toward both McKay and McKay's antics wholesale, seems to think seeking protection from the radiation is ridiculous, which is just ten different kinds of stupid. He gives McKay a look of silent judgement as he makes his request which McKay seems to misinterpret. He thinks that Lorne gives him the look because he thinks he's acting selfishly. He has not caught onto just how little Lorne seems to think of every aspect of who he is.

But the thing is, McKay's focus on this secondary, really quite peripheral concern is also a sign of dissociation. Major Lorne is not equipped to understand why McKay is behaving the way he does, and he doesn't even have a baseline for McKay's normal behaviour. We can't really blame him for not understanding what is going on with McKay, but he is still being dickish for little to no reason. McKay even shows concern for Lorne's men, asking Weir to have all the available suits brought out for them, not just for himself.

But you better believe McKay cares about what has happened to Sheppard. If he cared less, we might see him react in some normal way, be worried, be freaking out, try to think of ways of saving him. This full blown dissociation tells us just how deeply he is affected, and the fact that he mentions the concept of dissociation himself later just invites us to try fitting his foot into this particular shoe, see if it fits.

At the same time, Sheppard is slowly regaining consciousness inside a cave, tied up with Teyla.

They appear to have been stunned, and while Teyla was hit first, Sheppard is the first to wake up probably due to his bigger body absorbing the blast. Sheppard is trying to make sense of their current situation and surroundings as Teyla stirs behind him:

Teyla: Colonel? Sheppard: You OK? Teyla: My head is pounding. Where are we? Sheppard: I don't know, but I was just about to ask him.

Sheppard is glad that he's here with Teyla and not McKay. While his hands may be literally tied at the moment, he is still more free to think of what to do, how to get them out of this. He's not paralyzed by fear, he's not distracted by his constant concern for his well-being. This is why he had chosen Teyla to go with him, and this just proved that his choice had been correct.

Now, we've seen several times in the past, especially when Acastus Kolya has been involved, that Sheppard has swallowed down all his smart-ass remarks out of fear for McKay's safety. We saw him physically have to force his hand down not to say what he was thinking in The Eye (S01E11). But now, although he does not know anything about this man other than that he must be dangerous since he had got the drop on them, he seems much more carefree. They're definitely in a tight spot, but he's been in tighter spots than this.

Sheppard: You might wanna be careful where you point that thing. Looks like you've got the safety off. Sheppard: OK, be that way. But my guess is if you wanted us dead, we'd be dead right now, so why don't you tell us who you are and what you want? Sheppard: Alright, I'll go first. I'm Lieutenant Colonel John Sheppard.

Notice how Sheppard keeps direct eye contact with him, trying to come across earnest, trustworthy, stalwart and unthreatening, all at the same time. Make no mistake, he is attempting to charm Ronon into letting them go. This is one of the weapons in his arsenal and he has never been above using it to get what he wants.

So, this is not Ford. They had thought who ever had killed the wraith had been Ford due to the removal of the enzyme sac. But this man, whoever he was, certainly seemed capable of killing a wraith. Maybe they had been wrong. What was the chance they'd find two wraith killers on a planet that doesn't support animal life? So Sheppard isn't worried for McKay. As far as he knew, Lorne and McKay had been tracking the same sound, and they weren't here, and this man obviously hadn't killed himself and Teyla. So, he could pretty safely assume McKay and Lorne were still out there somewhere. That freed him up.

He's even more relieved to learn that this man is a soldier:

Dex: "Colonel"? Sheppard: It's my rank. Military designation.Dex: Specialist Ronon Dex. Sheppard: That's you? Dex: Name and rank. Sheppard: Military? Dex: I used to be. It was a long time ago.

While he didn't know this man, at least he could understand him. Clearly, he was on the lam. He was running away from something. He could understand that too. Still, he was curious. This man had clearly been through a lot. He could see something of what he felt reflected on this man's face.

Sheppard: And now? Dex: Now I'm deciding whether to kill you and your friends

Again, the topic of friendship is brought up. Friends, he says. Plural. We don't know whether he has seen the other soldiers, but he has seen Ford and by their fatigues, probably assumes Ford is one of their people. Ford and Teyla make two friends. Sheppard, however, must assume that he means the others.

The thing is, none of them are really his friends. He doesn't really have a lot of friends despite what he tells Teyla later in Sateda (S03E04), and his response there is also a case of the lady protesting too much. Most of his friends are dead or had walked out on him a long time ago (and one of his dead friends, Dex, actually had the same name as this man, seems like). He wanted to think of Teyla as his friend but they were more collegial. And Rodney. He wanted to be Rodney's friend. He tried really hard to be a friend to him. They had agreed they would be friends. So why was it so difficult? The more he tried, the more it hurt. If he was honest with himself, Rodney was not his friend either. He's not sure he even wanted that. He's not sure that he was able.

But still, who ever this man thought was his friend, he certainly didn't want them to be killed. Being his friend was the quickest way to get killed, really, so it was probably real good he didn't have any.

Back in the jumper, McKay is trying to take care of Sheppard's people who, likely taking after the example of their superiors, seem to not want to listen to their science officer despite being on an actual alien planet of which they know precious little.

He offers them the suits that they had brought with them from Atlantis but they all just seem to ignore him:

McKay: Hey, wait, aren't any of them gonna... OK, that's just reckless! There are four suits. Lorne: Not exactly designed for moving through dense brush and rough terrain, not to mention possible combat, huh? McKay: No, but by my calculations we've been exposed to 327 millisieverts since the sun came up. It may not sound like much to you but I've been keeping a running tally of my lifetime exposure to radiation: X-rays, cellphones, plane rides, that whole unfortunate Genii nuclear reactor thing. My God, last week we flew dangerously close to the corona of a sun!

Lorne does not seem to realize how close to crying McKay is here, how he has to stop in the middle of his speech, just as he mentions plane rides (Sheppard is a pilot, has come really close to dying flying a plane very recently), before continuing on to Genii nukes (Sheppard had almost died flying their nuke up to the hive) and recently having flown into the coronasphere of a sun (with Sheppard, they had almost died together). He stops, swallows, and then continues as though he was just listing things. Lorne thinks McKay is just complaining when he is clearly thinking about Sheppard and trying not to unravel right then and there.

But then, we get a really interesting exchange. From having clearly just thought about Sheppard, Sheppard, Sheppard there, McKay's mind then goes directly to having kids and how he might not be able to have them any more, things being as they are:

McKay: As it is, I may have to forego reproducing. Lorne: Yeah, that's funny. I was just thinking that might be wise.

This is another entirely unnecessary dig from Lorne. "Please don't breed because the world doesn't need more people like you," is the gist of it. That's really pretty petty toward someone that has done nothing but try to help him out, offering him his sunscreen, having Weir transport a radiation suit to protect him from deadly radiation, trying to make what seems to be--if not his very first then at least one of the first--missions on an alien planet easier for him through normalizing it with conversation. He's done everything Lorne has asked of him, he has been considerate and helpful. If McKay has done anything here, he's shown what a good parent he would be. He's not only one of the most brilliant minds of his generation, he's clearly Mr Mom. You'd be so lucky to see him with kids.

But it's interesting, what he says here. During the first season, there were multiple references to children in connection with Sheppard and McKay. In Childhood's End (S01E06) Sheppard told Keras that he might want children one day. And while it first seemed like McKay had neither the desire nor the ability to get along with children, by the end of the episode the youngest children actually clung to him, they seemed to like him best. He was the safe adult for them. He was ready to protect these children with his own life. He was surprisingly good with kids, is the thing. And what McKay says here is that he, just like Sheppard, had thought about having kids. He had planned on having kids but now was beginning to doubt that would or even should happen.

We don't know if Sheppard and McKay ever talked about kids or having kids between the two of them but fact is, they were both ready to bring the kids to Atlantis to keep them safe. It seems like they had been on the same page about this, too. And then, everything had changed. What ever dreams or plans McKay had had, they had now all burned to the ground. The radiation aspect is just an excuse. In his heart of hearts he thinks that it's just not going to happen for him because no one wants him. No one wants to make a family with him. He doesn't deserve to have a family. And even if by some miracle he found someone that would be willing to start a family with him, the most convenient way of procreating just isn't on the table for him. As far as we know, Rodney McKay has never had sex with a woman and has no interest in doing that either.

And the thing is, this is one of those throw-away lines that the mainstream audience is going to take as evidence of a heterosexual orientation where that's not what he says at all. He's not saying he had so been looking forward to breeding with an available female of his species if only he found the right one. He's saying that he thinks he's too damaged to reproduce, and that he doesn't want to transfer his damage onto his own children (and this really isn't just about the radiation). Heterosexual people don't have a monopoly on wanting to have kids. Non-heterosexual people have had children the world over, from the dawn of history. This tells us that like Sheppard, McKay had been wanting to have kids. It seems to have been a dream that they shared. But that dream had been shattered. And it's interesting that his mind went to having kids from clearly having thought about Sheppard almost dying multiple times.

Back in the cave, Ronon is applying some concoction on his skin to protect himself from the sun like a pussy, if we're going by what the military types seem to be thinking. Sheppard is both trying to reason with the stranger and, in order to try gain his trust, volunteers some information about their operation:

Sheppard: Look, the men guarding the Stargate are highly-trained soldiers armed with deadly weapons. Dex: Stargate? Sheppard: Stargate. Big circle thing. Dex: I've always known it as the Ring of the Ancestors. No matter, I have to make it through. Sheppard: Look, we didn't come here looking for trouble, and the whole killing thing is really unnecessary. Dex: If your friends try to stop me... Sheppard: They won't, if I tell them not to. Untie us, we'll all go to the gate together and you can be on your way.

Again they make a reference to friends which really seems to be a recurring theme in this episode.

Ronon seems to have spent many years all on his own and while he can tell these people are not wraith or native to this planet, or seem to want anything to do with him, he's still suspicious of them. As someone that has survived unfathomable dangers, he can tell that these two people are dangerous and while Sheppard probably is being sincere about his offer because he has places to be and people to see that are not this cave and not this man, Ronon can also tell that he's not exactly an honest man. And it's true that while Sheppard has mostly been telling this stranger the truth, he has been trying to game him the whole time too. He has been trying to come across as earnest and trustworthy because a dishonest man can also use the truth as a weapon. Sheppard is an "any means necessary" kind of guy, and here he is trying to figure out what means to apply to this guy. But it's noticeable that, practiced though his calm here is, even though he's tied up, he seems to be perfectly in control of the situation and especially is in control of himself.

What's interesting about this is that Sheppard seems to be talking to Ronon as one would to a child. As one would try to reason with a child. He's talking like a parent trying to get a child to undo something stupid and dangerous, to walk them back from getting themselves hurt. This is similar to what happened in Childhood's End. We are made to think of one of them having children, and then are shown what a great parent the other man would be. Here, both of them are actually exemplifying qualities of good parents: McKay is taking care of people where Sheppard is playing the part of a responsible, firm but compassionate authority figure. Their parenting styles seem complementary. It's too bad McKay now seems to have given up on this dream.

Continued in Pt. 5

[fenicenera83]

Would I be here or anywhere else if it were not for you?

Oh boy, to think I've been wanting to do this post for a long time, but I always put it off. Now it has already happened that for the Marius/Daniel ship I have argued, mainly because of what is written in those two lines in, I simply call it, 'Atlantis'. Forgive the little dedication I have for that book. I was told that 'Marius lost Daniel to Armand' has only one meaning, and only one way of interpretation, that there is no room for anything else, except of course the throwing away of one for the other. And I make no apologies for saying that this pisses me off. First of all, because I love Daniel's character, and his journey of pain and loss of self is something that has always made me think a lot. The thing that causes me more annoyance, however, than those who support this theory, is the fact that in my eyes, it creates a Daniel Molloy, who is a profiteering, carrion, and emotionless bastard, and Daniel IS NOT THAT. We can talk endlessly, meta, canon, headcanon, there is no way you can convince me that this is the case and that it is justified that it is so. Daniel has his flaws, like everyone else, but he's a loving, giving character, even when it hurts. What actually happened, I personally think, is because of Daniel's good heart. In fact, at that moment in the story, everyone was against Armand, no one shared his vision, no one wanted to listen to him, so much so that, as we know, even Marius gets into a very serious discussion with him, which leads to harsh sentences. What I think, is that Daniel understood Armand's loneliness and isolation and also his anger and frustration, that he sensed how he was suffering from that situation, how being openly against Marius marked him, because only Marius has the power to generate such strong feelings in Armand. Conflictual and non-conflictual. I think that the moment Daniel understood, he decided to comfort Armand. Perhaps, it could be that even Daniel himself shared Armand's view on this problem. Be that as it may, I am not talking about love in the romantic/passionate sense but about a different kind of love, seeing someone we love suffer is destructive, seeing their pain and inability to make themselves understood, together with the fear of what they fear might happen to those he loves as well. This is a Daniel I like, one who is him, a Daniel who, in order not to leave someone dear to him alone, decides to separate himself from the One who saved him, and loved and protected and cherished him. An act of altruism, dictated by the need to live up to the one who brought him back to life. Marius taught him to trust again, to open up again, to love again. So what I think those words mean is this, that Daniel followed Armand because he feared for him, so as not to leave him alone.

Also because in fact, those two lines do not speak of love, no romantic/sensual love is mentioned. There are no references to anyone's heart or need. Yes exactly I'm drawing a parallel with Blood Communion and where Anne Rice, clearly spoke of, an Armand needing Marius and an Armand reopening his heart to Marius. In 'Atlantis' there is none of this. I firmly believe that the only reason Daniel decided to follow Armand is out of empathy, and it is perhaps also because seeing Marius so convinced, so committed, so dedicated, he thought that at that moment Marius did not need him there. Which, as we know, is not true, Marius suffered greatly from that detachment. I believe that in good faith Daniel did not realise this. And obviously, because I always have to put tenderness between Marius and Daniel, Marius let him go, because he loves him, respects him, trusts him and his judgement, and would never impose anything on him. And this is love, the dedicated kind, the strong and pure kind, where you are afraid, you feel pain, but you leave it up to the one you love to embrace his or her own life, with his or her own decisions.There, that is my final and personal thought on this. The way I see Daniel Molloy, and the way I see how he would never hurt Marius, how he would never go against him, how everything they went through together supporting each other created a unique and unbreakable bond between them, blessed by love.

[annwayne]

FIVE SONGS PLAYLISTS I'VE BEEN LISTENING TO ON REPEAT

Thanks for the tag @bagheerita :D

Instead of individual songs, I will offer playlists within a youtube video! These are what I put on when I'm writing, so rn they are what I'm actually listening to more so than like, specific songs lol

astarion is falling in love with you - BG3 Astarion romance playlist

I will bring you back to life - Orpheus & Eurydice inspired playlist

Let the nectar flow - Greek Mythology playlist

Ordainer of Inexorable Judgement - Neuvillette playlist

Why do you keep acting? - Fontaine archon playlist

(all of them are hype but the last two are genuinly so cool and practically a radio play like it's amazing)

npt: @wolveria @chaniis-atlantis @klynnvakarian @aintgonnatakethis

[sga-owns-my-soul]

in the tag game, what's the trinity au one?

thank you mushroom for giving me an excuse to post this ooh thanks!!! this one is kinda long but i'm obsessed with this and it might be one of the best scenes i've ever written and i like elizabeth being a badass babe and yelling at people

Elizabeth never stopped glaring at him as she silently took a sheet of paper out of her desk. John glared back.

"Effective immediately, I am officially resigning from the position of Head of Science and Research on Atlantis. Due to a recent error in judgement that has led to a lack of trust amongst my colleagues, I believe it best for me to step back and allow someone more qualified to head the department." Elizabeth read sharply, and John suddenly forgot how to breathe.

"What- what the hell is that? Is this a joke? Where the hell is McKay-"

"He quit John! He left the city, he's gone back to Earth! He quit the entire damn Stargate program!" Elizabeth yelled, and John stumbled back like it was a physical blow.

"He- no, Rodney wouldn't- he- when did he leave?" John stuttered, all the anger from the last week draining so quickly John could barely remember why he was holding onto it. Rodney was... gone?

"He left 2 days ago. Maybe you would have noticed if you didn't turn and run at the mere mention of his name," Elizabeth snapped, glaring at John like this was his fault.

Maybe it was.