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cringemesstickles · 1 month ago

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Joseph Joestar: The Phobia Expert

[TickleTober Day 10: Spidering]

Summary:

Word Count: 2091

Pairing: Josecae implied

A/N: This is my first jjba fic yippeee

I always found it funny how it's canon that Caesar doesn't like bugs, so here we are. :]

(also im posting this on my laptop because mobile tumblr is busted for me rn. so if the formatting looks goofy, sorry :'))

Joseph was on the balcony of Lisa Lisa’s castle, watching the waves dash against the rocks of Air Supplena Island. Despite the gorgeous view, the Joestar was left grumbling and irritated.

“Stupid Caesar… stupid Lisa Lisa… stupid Island…” He huffed, chucking a pebble over the rails.

Of the three things he mentioned, his new training partner took the cake. Joseph had never met someone so insufferable.

Simply thinking about his smug face got under the brunette’s skin even further, bringing him to kick the concrete like an angry child.

“Who does he think he is?! He’s nothing but a-”

Before he could finish that thought, a panicked yell echoed through the halls of the massive building. It was hard to place where exactly it was coming from, but it sounded like it was from… Caesar’s room? And that was certainly Caesar yelling!

In spite of his distaste towards the man, Joseph dropped everything and darted through the halls.

Was Caesar okay?! What was he yelling about?! Were they already under attack?!

Joseph couldn’t get the worried thoughts out of his head. Sure, he hated his training partner… but he didn’t want him to get hurt.

When he reached the Italian’s room, he kicked the door open and frantically scanned the area.

“CAESAR?! WHA-“

But the sight had him stopped in his tracks.

The normally pristine room was now a chaotic mess. The bed sheets were crumpled and peeling off the mattress, pillows were on the floor, the desk was a disorganized sprawl of papers— it was as though Caesar had already been fighting a battle which he was losing terribly.

The Italian was standing on his mattress, holding onto the wall and gasping for air. His normally neat hair was mussed and his skin was a few shades paler than it usually was. His eyes were wide and panicked and… maybe even a little wet.

It looked like a tornado had struck the room, which was NOT how Caesar liked things.

What the hell happened? It looked like the threat was still present by the state the older man looked.

“CAESAR!! WHAT HAPPENED?! ARE THEY HERE?!” Joseph asked wildly, his eyes scanning rapidly around the room.

Caesar’s head snapped to the door, a bit panicked by the fact that someone else was witnessing this. Nevertheless, he was relieved to have some backup.

“J-Jojo!! The chair!!”

Joseph blinked, his brows knitting in confusion. He looked at the chair, but nothing was there… at least nothing big enough to see from where he was standing.

He stepped closer…

“CAREFUL, JOJO!!!” Caesar pleaded.

What on earth was the blonde so freaked out about? It must be some sort of invisible- wait…

Joseph froze in his place.

There was no way… no way THAT was what the great Caesar Zeppeli was so freaked out about.

Joseph kept his eyes glued to the spider at the top of the backrest. Sure, it wasn’t a tiny spider by any means… but a SPIDER?! Caesar was a hamon user for crying out loud!

“Um… Caesar?”

“What?! Why aren’t you doing anything?!”

The spider, however, was getting a bit antsy from all the noise happening around it. It started crawling to the back of the chair, and the movement made the poor Italian squeal in terror as he clutched onto the wall with a death grip.

The Brit couldn’t stop the laugh that jumped from his throat. This was just too good…

“Caesar, it’s just a little spider!”

Caesar, however, wasn’t finding this funny in the slightest. He shot the taller man a look of desperation, his eyes wide with terror as they flickered between Joseph and the spider.

“It’s not little, you dolt!!! I-It’s the size of my hand!!!”

Joseph snorted. “Yeah, your palm…”

The spider, oblivious to their conversation, started skittering down the backrest, getting closer to the floor. The sight made the Italian more frantic and he squeezed his eyes shut, a slight waver to his voice.

J-Just kill it or something… anything!!!”

The brunette’s head tilted at that.

Caesar sounded legitimately distressed… as much as he didn’t like the guy, he couldn’t just let him suffer mentally.

He sighed and bent over to untie his shoe, taking it off his foot and standing back up. Fearlessly, he strode over to the innocent creature and squished it with a loud thump. He almost felt bad about it, but he knew the Italian wouldn’t calm down unless the thing was dead-dead.

He put his boot back on and stood up, leaning against the wall and crossing his arms.

“There. Nothing but a pancake now.”

Caesar was speechless for a few moments, staring at the little corpse. He eventually exhaled, his shoulders slumping as the tension drained out of his body. As he let the air out, he let his body drop onto the mattress, crossing his legs and burying his face in his hands.

“T-Thanks…” He muttered under his breath.

The Joestar cocked his head to the side, raising a brow. He wasn’t used to seeing his partner like this and he kind of hated it.

Not that he LIKED the guy’s cocky, know-it-all attitude… but seeing him all undone like this? That was worse.

Sure, over his interactions with Caesar, he’d think to himself that he wanted to see the guy undone and break that stupid facade. But he didn’t mean he wanted to see him terrified over a stupid little spider, though it was admittedly kinda funny at first…

“What makes you so terrified of spiders? I mean… you fight nasty, immortal beings, so what’s the deal?”

The question caught Caesar off guard. Joseph sounded legitimately curious… he wasn’t mocking him or anything, just asking a simple question.

“Well, I don’t know. It’s an irrational fear, okay? And it’s all bugs… the way they skitter around… they’re all disgusting and they’ve got too many legs and some of them are slimy and-”

“Alright, alright, point taken.” The Brit cut him off, rolling his eyes. Something inside of Joseph wanted to help… but he wasn’t much for feelings, nor was he a therapist.

But something about that spider gave him a different idea…

Suddenly that signature cheeky grin spread across the taller man’s face as he rose from the chair, striding over to the bed to plop next to the Italian.

“You know, Caesar… I’m a bit of a phobia expert. I bet I can get rid of your weird bug thing in no time!”

Caesar looked over at the cocky look on Joseph’s face, a mixture of annoyance and dread filling his stomach.

He knew that look… it was the look of someone up to no good.

“Oh yeah? And how do propose we ‘get rid of it?’” He scoffed, crossing his arms.

“Close your eyes.”

“Absolutely not”

“C’mooon…” Joseph whined, “just do it!”

The Italian wasn’t easily swayed… not at all. But the guy was offering to at least mitigate his phobia. He knew it was likely a load of crap, but he couldn’t help his curiosity.

“Fine…” He grumbled, his eyes fluttering shut.

Seeing the shorter man listen to his command, Joseph’s eyes sparkled with mischief. He raised his hands and wiggled his fingers in preparation, then they dove into the blonde’s neck, skittering against the soft skin like the legs of itty bitty spiders.

Caesar’s eyes shot open and he jolted.

“GAH!” He yelped, immediately trying to swat the Brit’s fingers away. “W-What are you doing?!”

The response made Joseph’s heart leap.

“Exposure therapy!” He exclaimed cheerfully, giving a playful wink.

He continued to mimick an insect’s walk with his fingers, spidering his nails along his partner’s neck and occasionally wandering up behind his ears, eliciting uncharacteristic squeaks. The Italian was a mess of giggles, a state the Joestar never thought he’d see him in.

It was quite refreshing. But was it adorable? Absolutely not!

…

Okay, maybe a little…

“J-Jojohoho, stop it, you oaf!” Caesar protested between noises of mirth, bringing his shoulders up to his ears and his chin to his chest, a failed attempt at protecting his ticklish spots.

No matter what he did, the Brit was persistent, digits scrabbling over any spot he could reach. It didn’t matter if his targets were cut off, he’d easily find a substitute.

“No can do, Caesarino! You gotta face your fears!” Joseph snickered, enjoying the Italian’s frantic laughs and snorts.

Caesar was squirming every which way, trying to get the brunette’s hands away from him, but that only seemed to make the tickling more intense.

His cheeks had tinted scarlet by now, the smile on his face more genuine than his usual cocky smirk. His nose was scrunched and his eyes squeezed shut, refusing to look at the taller’s teasing expression.

His attempts at pushing the offending hands away were futile.

He was a skilled hamon user, sure… but with all the laughter, he couldn’t regulate his breathing. He would surely blow Joseph out the window once this was over though, regardless of whether it was helping or not.

“Q-Quit it!!” Caesar insisted, still batting at the fingers while trying to twist away from them.

He was also desperately holding back his amusement. He really didn’t want to give the annoying brunette the satisfaction of giving him a good time… even though he kind of already did.

“You know, Caesar… I didn’t exactly peg you as the ticklish type~” The Joestar teased with a mischievous smirk, fluttering his fingers down to the smaller man’s collarbones, earning a loud squeal, which got an amused chuckle out of the tickler.

“S-Stop laughing!!” Caesar huffed, but as soon as the words came out, a wave of bright, hysterical laughter tore from his throat, his head falling back from the strength of them.

What caused this? Joseph had found his ribs.

The spidering gimmick was given up in favor of digging into the sensitive ribcage, the younger man’s eyes lighting up with glee at the dramatic reactions.

“Aw, did I find a good spot?~” He teased with a grin, easily overpowering his training partner due to how weakened he was from the tickling.

Seeing the uptight Italian shrieking and giggling like a little kid was something Joseph couldn’t have predicted. He also couldn’t have predicted how cute it would be…

Why was this so cute?!

Caesar was oblivious to the subtle blush on Joseph’s cheeks as he himself was reduced to helpless flailing and stuttering giggles as those damned fingers dug skillfully between each bone, lighting his nerves on fire with tickly sensations.

He fell back on the bed, still squirming and laughing like a madman.

“M-Mercy…! Plehehease!” He cried frantically, a couple mirthful tears falling down his burning cheeks.

Joseph immediately pulled his hands away, snapped out of his slight daze. He was so wrapped in his own thoughts that he forgot the poor guy needed to breathe and-

Wait… did Caesar just beg for mercy?! He never thought he’d see the day.

The brunette crossed his arms and leaned against the bed frame, giving his training partner some room to calm down. There was a cocky smirk on his face as he watched the normally suave hamon user reduced to a giggly mess.

He was starting to like the guy more than he’d like to admit…

It took a few moments for Caesar to catch his breath. His cheeks were flushed, and his eyes were still slightly watery from the attack.

As he sat there gasping, he shot a glare towards Joseph.

“S-stupid idiot…” He muttered breathlessly. But there was no real bite to his words, and the corners of his mouth were upturned in a slight smile.

The sight drew a red hue to Joseph’s cheeks, but he played it off by carrying his playful demeanor.

“Well? Are you still freaking out about that silly spider?”

The question caused Caesar to huff and roll his eyes. He didn’t wanna admit it, but…

“Fine… maybe you’re not totally useless like I thought before…”

Joseph’s grin widened and he was going to make a snarky comment, but something in the Italian’s expression prevented him.

“Thank you, Jojo…”

Caesar’s words made the taller man blink with surprise. His face was overtaken with disbelief and he waited for the Italian to follow it up with a sarcastic remark, but that moment never came.

The man was serious.

“N-No problem.”

When his training partner gave a smile in response, Joseph’s heart leaped.

Maybe Caesar wasn’t so bad after all… maybe Joseph even liked him a little bit.