#john doe one shot

[astrok1dz]

Heyyy so I just found your account and I really like how you write John Doe so- could I request some head canons or a lil fic about Doe comforting their s/o who’s feeling down?? Something fluffy :]

John Doe comforting his S/O!

You had had an awful day at work. Customers being rude, annoying little kids making dozens of products fall over, all of which you had to clean up, no one willing to lend you a helping hand. You had been late as well, with nothing close to a neat aspect; messy hair, dark eye bags, and a terrible stench to your body. Besides, you could swear there was a dull ache in muscles you weren’t even aware existed.

You knew damn well when your shift ended and your coworker arrived and pointed out how awful you looked, it was about damn time to go home, and that’s what you did, biting your tongue and choking back tears.

You managed to unleash as soon as you closed the front door, sliding down to the floor next to it and curling up in a little ball, sobbing uncontrollably, yet quietly. What if your boyfriend heard y-

“My love! You’re home! Oh You! I missed you so so m- love? Oh no…”

You looked up, sniffling.

“What happened? Are you okay? Did anyone hurt you?”

You nodded.

“Shit Doe, today was- *sniff*- the worst day of my fucking life. Every customer was so fucking rude, one even called me a whore- and- and- *sniff*- and another one had this- this RUDE fucking kid that kept throwing products and- and no one picked it up and- shit! *Sniff*- and then my coworker said I looked like ass and-”

You broke down, now crying loudly. Between the blur that your tears created you managed to glance at John, who looked at you like a sad puppy, looking even more hurt than you did. Before you could check in on him and try to forget about your own pain, you had two arms wrapped around you softly.

“Oh my love… those people don’t deserve to even breathe next to someone like you. Do you know their names? Do you want me to have a little… chat with them?”

You shook your head, nuzzling his neck.

“I just want to- I-I don’t know… am I really so bad at my job? Am I really so fucking ugly?”

“Of course not-”

“Well what would you know? I’m the only person you ever look at! You will never tell me the truth!”

You knew you fucked up when you heard what sounded like a wince and the hug get a little looser.

“I-I’m s-sorry…”

“Love… before you came along, I had never seen such a lovely and pretty person. You’re great at your job! I know better than anyone, you charmed me!”, he chimed, cupping your face to make you look at him and smiling widely. You giggled, and his smile seemed to get impossibly bigger. You sniffled and dried some of your tears.

“And I don’t even know what you mean by ugly! You smell sooooo good, and-”

Well you couldn’t keep feeling bad with the way he kept praising you, your looks and personality. He clung to you the rest of the day, and by the end of it, you had forgotten what had upset you in the first place.

[s0fter-sin]

they really 50/50’d the thunderbolts with characters i like and characters i couldn’t give less of a shit about

[heavenbarnes]

The Greasy camera for some reason just feels so Canon. WHERE IS THE GREASE FROM JONATHAN

HAHAHAHA i reckon when he gets home you grab his phone and furiously clean his camera lens on the hem of your t-shirt, he’s confused but lets you do it

it’s not until you’re both about to head out and he’s got his keys but he’s looking for his phone- you watch him grab it off the bench and HOLD IT BY THE CORNER WITH HIS FINGERS RIGHT ON THE FUCKING CAMERA LENS

you blink at him silently as he goes “what? what’s wrong?” and you honestly cannot be bothered so you just stick to your voice memos 🫶🏼

[estradasphere]

my favorite unreleased Estradasphere song (and one of my favorite Estradasphere songs ever) is Say Your Prayers but luckily we do have some pretty good recordings of it so it's not the exact same but y'know

[baxndaid]

he would act as some sort of weird, glorified fairy godmother, though even with his innocent exterior, he knew that what he was doing would be frowned upon if exposed to the world around him. he likes to think of himself as some sort of saviour, caretaker, taking care and protecting those he sees beneath him (which, in his eyes, was everyone that wasn’t an archon)

though of course there’s a lot of things he thinks about that aren’t all “protective” like, mostly targeted at you. his thoughts were filthy and intrusive, so much so that the wind carried a faint sweet smell of roses and a stronger scent of bitterness. an interesting smell that most people wouldn’t notice, or instead they’d believe that their God was particularly pleased that day for whatever reason. you never paid attention to the wind’s bipolar mood, it never effected you anyway

girl i am literally stuck in a room with limited internet for 4 hours u get this and this only !!!

i’ll write more i promise, i’m moving into my john doe, sundrop/moondrop, zexal phases again so i’ll probably write for them as well AND when scarachoochie comes out, i’ll probably do smth for him too idk where he like steps on you or smth idk

[automatonwithautonomy]

heyyy. wrote a malevolent one shot in like an hour. going to go pass out now bye.

[unproduciblesmackdown]

2023 was alot. Here are none of the bum times and some of the good times, but mostly just cheese plates and cocktails and getting dressed for gigs in public bathrooms and West Coast Summer and Extravagant Everything Else and Diane Kitten.

[grimmjow]

incel ofmd fans vs chad black sails fans

[astrok1dz]

Was sneaking through the John doe tag n found your account 👀 I really like your writing! Hope you don't mind me spam liking a bit!

I don't see anywhere if requests are open, unless I'm dumb lmao, so feel free to just toss this if they're closed

Could I request John Doe with an affectionate reader, who likes to rant to him about their interests, but always feels like they're annoying him after cause growing up they never had anyone listen to them ramble

Thank you, regardless if you do this or not, and have a great day! ❤

A/n: OMG YES I FORGOT TO SAY THAT REQUESTS ARE OPEN- also ur request is personally so relatable omfg. that being said.

Doe with an affectionate S/O!

cws: mentions of insecurities(?, pure fluff, not proofread, may be OOC(??

Doe will listen to you talk about anything.

I mean. ANYTHING.

You could talk about cockroaches for an hour for all he cares. The fact that it’s YOU talking and that you chose to talk to him? He’s melting.

But, you’re insecure, and John is too im love to not be oblivious.

He’s a little dense when it comes to this.

Sometimes he’ll listen to you talk too much and he’ll look like he’s not paying attention

But it’s the opposite!! He’s registering everything!! He’s just quiet cuz he doesn’t want to interrupt! He’ll burst into words and affection as soon as you finish ranting

You talk to him about this and how it makes you feel. You feel like you’re a chore or burden to listen to, and that you don’t want that to be the case. Especially not with him.

He will reassure you oh so desperately

“You just- stay so quiet… I don’t wanna bother you with all my ranting. I-I- I do all of the talking and maybe you’re fed up with it and-”

He stares at you in SHOCK. Pure, raw, SHOCK. Is this what he caused? A slight pain hits right through him, to have caused you this stress.

“Oh no no no my love! I love listening to you, your voice is so lovely and everything you say is so interesting, I swear swear swear swear swear!”

He will proceed to recite everything you said back to him. Even if you tell him you believe him. From then on he started commenting and getting more and more involved in the rants you had rather than just nodding quietly.

“I’m so sorry I caused you this stress, I’m so so sorry!”

You hug him, almost tearing up, because he’s just so worried about your well-being and he actually loves listening to you? He starts showing it much better and much more often too, and you just have to stop yourself from crying when he makes little additions to your rants.

“… and then she said the exact same thing I did! So why was it all wrong when I said it? I mean- the fuck is her deal?!”

“Right? She doesn’t own the truth. She sounds so annoying, love. You want me to do something about it…?!”

Your mouth hangs open for a little bit, before gaining back your composure, heart swelling in your chest.

“Just take me out to eat, will you, Doe?”

“Of course!”

I think a lot of people jump right to the gory and killing part when they learn that Doe will do anything for You, when it can also be something as simple as learning how to be a better partner for you.

TYSM FOR THE REQUEST!!! I LOVED WRITING (and projecting onto) THIS!! <3

Tags:

[cappurrccino]

!!

!!

(i'm hoping tumblr puts those exclamation points back in the ask box where they belong, but this may just have some exquisitely strange formatting)

you also get a character i made about a year ago!

this is no, my beloved goa'uld who i haven't done much with but who still bounces around my brain like a dvd logo

she spent a while playing the system lord games and then got sick of the rules, and of the system lords, AND of boring hosts who just scream and cry and woe is me, please don't possess me every time she jumps into one, so she stole a new host from a crop brought to [insert pissy system lord here] and went "let's fuck shit up"

she's a little mean, she's a lot unhinged, she's a pirate queen (her host WAS a pirate captain, but was mutinied against and tossed through the gate where she subsequently got captured and no, ever gracious little parasite that she is, happily took revenge against that crew and anyone else that stood in her way of crowning herself queen of the seas)

she hates the system lords and thinks the tok'ra are boring and to call her an ally of sg1 would be a stretch, but she's sometimes almost helpful (for a price, of course) because she finds humans delightfully unpredictable and so far the sg crew have been the ones to fuck up the system lords most thoroughly and she lives for that

[send me a !! and i'll introduce you to an oc!]

[binch-i-might-be]

ok so not to bbc sherlock post in the year of our lord 2023 but I've been rewatching lately, and in my procrastination as to avoid burdening myself with season 2 episode 3 The Reichenbach Fall, I rewatched the unaired pilot.

objectively speaking it's overall not as well executed as the actual Study In Pink, the acting, scoring, editing, cinematography, sets-

but I gotta say, I do prefer the overall flow of the plot? it's half an hour shorter of course, so maybe I just simply didn't have the time to get bored, but I feel like the whole Mycroft thing not being present helps SO MUCH.

can't help but feel like they could have pushed Mycroft's introduction into The Blind Banker which overall isn't a very strong episode anyway.

I also kinda liked the whole confrontation with the cabbie better in the unaired version just because Sherlock was drugged and as such at an obvious disadvantage.

I never really liked the way the cabbie's whole spiel was presented, claiming he talked the victims into willingly taking poison only to reveal he threatened them with certain death instead of a 50/50 chance, and the omission of the (fake) gun and introduction of the drugging of the victims actually makes. more sense to me?

something about him saying he'd just force the poison down Sherlock's throat if he refused to choose a pill is much more effective to me personally than just having him point a fake gun.

ok that's all for now bye✨

[dcxdpdabbles]

Bruce: It's come to my attention that a paranormal being has made Wayne Manor its residence. I've hired Constantine and his team to remove-

Tim: BUT BRUCE I LOVE HIM!

Bruce: What-

Tim: Stop trying to tear us apart!

Bruce: Tim wait what are you-

Tim: You'll never made me break up with Danny! NEVER!

John watching Tim race up to his room where he senses the ghost boy: I may be taking a shot in the dark here, but I think that lad is dating a ghost.

Bruce: Timothy Jack Drake Wayne, did you sneak a boyfriend into this house?! Young man, you turn right back around! *running up the stairs yelling*

John: So Bruce has no problem with the lad being dead?

Alfred: Please, as if Master Tim is the only one who dated a ghost. I used to have a gentleman caller on the other side as well.

John: Blimey, and here I thought you were just boring and snotty. Who was the ex?

Alfred: Clockwork

John: .....I have never respected another man as much as I do you Alfred.

Alfred: Yes, well, make sure it stays at respect, young man. I don't find children attractive

John blushing and in a squeaky voice: Yes, sir.

Madame Xanadu by a circle of salt: Soooo does this mean we're still getting the ghost out?

Zatanna: We better. I don't want to watch John make a fool over himself over Alfred anymore, then I have to. That man is way out of his league.

Madame Xanadu: What does that have to do with the Ghost Boy?

Danny popping in the middle of the circle: I think it's cause she has feelings for him. Personally I can't see it. Sad trench coat man is famous in the Zone for being terrible in romantic communication-

Zatanna: Bind the circle! We got him!

Madame Xanadu pale: What have we done.....your royal majesty, please excuse this disrespect. We had no idea you were the ghost, I swear on my soul-

Danny: That's okay. I don't mind at all. This is cute actually *swipes salt* like when a little kid pretends to shoot you.

Zatanna: ......that was our strongest binding spell.

Danny: Like I said, cute. It's not nearly as cute as my boyfriend, though. Tim's cuteness broke the bar! By the way, Alfred, I have a message for you from Clockwork. He wants to know if you are willing to have dinner sometime?

Alfred: Been there, done that. And frankly, I feel it's rather pathetic of a high being sending his grandson to ask for a date.

Zatanna blushing: Okay, John, I get it.

[yllowpages]

john's not a hero. basically all of the choices he makes during his story are the wrong ones. he is in the wrong up until the last second really. yes, he wanted revenge on iosef for this despicable thing iosef himself did. but how many people did john kill before even getting to iosef? and then after? but he finally realizes at the last moment there's no way out. no matter what he does, he'll keep breeding more death, even if he gets his peace. and there's nothing left for him anyway. he thought he was living to keep alive the memory of himself and helen, but the longer he maimed and killed to do that, the more tainted the intention became. helen's last wish for him was that he would find peace. and he realized he would really only have it in death. so he does right by all the bad things he's done for these last months and weeks by allowing caine to walk away. helping caine out of his bonds so he can return to his daughter.

[plan-3-tmars]

what he said

people keep calling him a sopping wet cat in my tags. accurate.