#joaquin phoenix x y/n

[k4marina]

too far in || j.r

for that anon that requested this, i like the way you think. ;)

synopsis: just a snippet of your relationship with the joker

warnings: joker (bc he deserves his own warning), sexual/suggestive themes, angst ig, my spelling probably.

fem!reader x joker

you really couldn't pinpoint when or how it started. it's almost as if he'd always been there; by your side in your bed. you knew it was wrong. having these.. relations with gothams most wanted was a sure way of having either gcpd on your front door or batman, and if the time came you hoped it was the former.

tonights no exception either. it's late, way past anyones bedtime. you're in your bed, sleeping after a long day of work when you felt the bed dip. something that always left you mesmerized was how he never made a sound. you'd only know he was there if he wanted it to be known, otherwise he would just blend into the shadows.

no words are exchanged, you don't need too. you both know what he wants and you have not problem giving it to him after all, you want it too.

he slips in you so easily like all the other times. his cut and callused hands sending shivers throughout your body, jagged nails gripping onto your flesh.

his hips are rutting into yours, leaving you breathless. depending on the time of night or on how much energy you both had it was either slow and somewhat meaningful or crude and animalistic, you just couldn't decide which one you'd prefer.

the only sounds he would make would be low groans and pants or the occasional dirty talk or instructions, never being one to make useless chit-chat, "that's it baby, right there," "what a filthy cunt, just taking my cock in" "imagine what people would say if they found out what we were doing."

you on the other hand were left hot and bothered. moaning whenever he'd hit that right spot, whimpering when his nails or sometimes teeth would clamp down on you, whining every time he'd finish and leave you empty.

when you wake up he's never there, but you know that he was by the smears of red and black grease paint on the pillow next to you. you'd push down the hurt you'd feel in your chest. it's okay. it's for the better. anything more or with him and your life is basically ruined.

but you knew, you were far too deep into him.

[greenmanalishi]

[fleckficgirl]

Heartthrob | Arthur Fleck x reader 💗 CHAPTER 14

Summary: Attempting to conceal her checkered past, a young dancer in Gotham (Y/N) lands a job at Ha-Ha’s and finds herself increasingly drawn to a shy, lonely clown named Arthur Fleck.

Warnings: sex, age gap, language, violence, mental illness, assault

Word Count: 3438

Chapter List: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13

Wayne Manor stood on a huge, sprawling estate. Living in Gotham made it easy to forget that places like this existed in the world. The trees were greener. The streets were so clean, they almost sparkled. There were no sirens, no smell of rotting garbage, no hunched over zombies stumbling in the streets. This part of Long Island was like a little eden - a heaven on earth carved out and carefully guarded by the ultra wealthy. 

“This is it,” you breathed as you and Arthur approached the gates. Fortunately, there were no angry dobermans prowling about the grounds today. Only freshly-trimmed grass and the towering mansion in the distance. You wondered if anyone was even home. 

Suddenly, Arthur froze in his tracks. “Y/N?” 

“Yeah?” 

He turned to face you, shoving his hands into his pockets, throwing his eyes to the ground.

“What do you think he’ll say?”

Your heart broke for Arthur all over again. You couldn’t imagine all the emotions that must be careening through him right now.  

“Thomas Wayne?” you drew in a breath. “I guess I don’t know what he’ll say. But we’re gonna get an answer out of him one way or another.” 

“I just…” Arthur sighed. “I just want him to talk to me. You don’t think that’s too much to ask, is it?”

You reached out and stroked Arthur’s cheek. 

“I don’t think so,” you shook your head. “After all, you said your mother’s been writing to him all this time and she hasn't gotten a response. I’m sure the Waynes have people who handle their correspondence - maybe they’ve ignored it or maybe nothing’s gotten through yet. Either way, I know I’d do the same thing if I were in your shoes.”

Arthur looked up at you. Those arresting, green eyes: filled with hope, hurt, anticipation. You said a silent prayer in that moment that whatever happened next, Arthur got the answers he needed. The answers he fucking deserved. 

Arthur pulled his hands out of his pockets and clasped them over your wrist. “I’m so glad you’re here, Y/N. If I had to come all by myself, I don’t think I’d have the guts to-”

He stopped, his eyes catching hold of something in the distance.

“What is it?” You turned around. Nothing had moved or changed that you could see. It took you a minute of scanning the surroundings until, finally, you spotted him: a tiny, sad-looking little boy playing all alone on a wooden jungle gym near the front gates. He couldn’t have been more than eight or nine years old. 

“I think that’s his son,” you murmured. “I heard about him a couple times in the news.”

“Bruce Wayne,” Arthur said. 

“That’s right, Bruce.” You stared at the boy, mystified. There was a distinct melancholy and isolation you could feel radiating off of him, even from so far away. 

“He looks so…so…” You struggled to find the words.

“Alone.” 

You pursed your lips and looked back at Arthur, nodding. And then another realization dawned on you. 

“Oh my God,” you blinked. “If Thomas Wayne really is your father, then that would mean…”

Arthur swallowed, nodding. “I’ve thought about that, too. I know it sounds crazy, but now that I see him…I…”

You waited. 

“He reminds me so much of myself when I was a little boy.” 

“Oh shit,” you exhaled, looking back at Bruce, then back at Arthur. “I mean…I suppose given what your mother’s said…what do you wanna do, Arthur?” 

Arthur took a deep breath and to your surprise, a warm, gently confident smile began to spread across his face. 

“I’m gonna go say ‘hi.’”

“Do you want me to come with you?” You wanted Arthur to feel completely supported. You knew that sometimes being supportive looked like coming along, and other times it looked more like hanging back and letting the other person take the lead. 

“I think I should do this part myself,” he said. “But I’ll come get you if I need to.” 

“I’ll be right here,” you squeezed his hand. “I love-”

Wait, what the hell were you saying? Had you completely taken leave of your senses?

“Uhm,” you cleared your throat. “I love…waiting!” you finished brightly, hoping he’d buy it. “I’ll wait as long as you need and I’ll be right here. Be strong, okay? And if they give you any trouble, call me and…I’ll beat everyone up!”

Arthur smiled, lifted your hand to his mouth and kissed the back of it, sending chills through your entire being. If he’d somehow picked up on your almost-love-confession, he didn’t show it. 

Arthur already has enough on his mind right now, you chastised yourself as you watched him approach the gate. He doesn’t need you muddling it further with your irrational emotions. 

You couldn’t tell Arthur you loved him now. First of all, it was way too soon. 

Second of all…

Well, the second part was embarrassing. And more than a little crazy. You knew your feelings for Arthur were real, but that didn’t stop you from recognizing how intense they were after only knowing him a short time. 

So why, then, did it feel like the most natural thing to say? The thing you sensed he needed to hear?

You meandered further up the drive, away from the entrance, giving Arthur his space but staying close enough so you could quickly run to his side if necessary. 

It was startlingly quiet here compared to the endless cacophony of Gotham City. So quiet, it felt like if you stopped and listened carefully, you could hear the wind in the trees singing to you. 

Despite the peaceful surroundings, however, bitter memories began to weave their way into your mind. You knew a good faction of your former GU classmates hailed from this part of Long Island - hell, some of their families probably even rubbed elbows with the Waynes themselves: probably got invited to their fancy Christmas and New Year’s Eve parties, toasting their continued privilege and fortune over a bottle of champagne that cost more than you made in a month. 

You didn’t have anything in common with those people. So how on earth had you found yourself among them in the first place? 

The answer was almost annoyingly simple: your parents had drilled the importance of getting an education into you since you were a toddler, telling you it would open doors, get you the better life you deserved…unlike the two of them who’d gotten jobs straight out of high school and lamented nonstop how much the lack of a college education had held them back from their potential. 

“Potential,” you muttered to yourself under your breath. That was the word they’d always used and it still left a sour taste in your mouth. 

“You have so much potential, Y/N,” they’d always say. “But you can’t let it go to waste. You have to work three times as hard as everyone else in order to realize it.”  

You’d believed them - bought their promises hook, line and sinker and dutifully applied yourself like the good little girl you were. The truth was, you’d never quite fit in at Burnley High, either. Most of the kids there dropped out or phoned in the bare minimum to scoot by and pick up a diploma, but you’d been among the top five performers in your graduating class of over 400 students. You’d done the extra work, taken the hardest classes, stayed home and sacrificed any semblance of a normal teenage social life to mold yourself into the high-achieving student your family wanted you to be. 

And it had paid off. At least for a brief moment in time. When the letter from Gotham University arrived saying you’d gotten in with a full scholarship, you’d cried tears of joy. Your mother had cried. Your father said he was proud of you. He never said things like that.

You remembered back to that day: the teary-eyed seventeen year old girl holding an acceptance letter in her sweaty, trembling hands like a golden badge of honor. That badge represented everything you’d worked your entire life for, everything you’d ever wanted: Validation. Recognition. Belonging.

Belonging. Yes, back then, that same girl believed she was finally being admitted through the golden gates to a place she belonged. You’d been naive enough to assume that at college you’d encounter more people like yourself, people who came from nothing but made amazing things happen through hard work and belief in themselves. 

But Gotham U had been nothing like you’d expected. 

Yes, the students were bright, but the vast majority were also spoiled and entitled. They seemed to take their enrollment at the school for granted, and the fact that their parents paid their tuition in full (were able to pay it in the first place) didn’t in any way accelerate their work ethic. These were kids whose parents owned country houses, summer houses and yachts. Kids who went to horseback riding camp every summer since they were six, learned how to ski when they were four, took vacations over spring break to places like Paris or Barcelona or the Hamptons. 

You’d never even ridden on an airplane. 

How ignorant that girl with the acceptance letter was, you mused. The dream of being a student at Gotham University had powered everything you’d worked for the first 17 years of your life…and all too late turned into a horrible nightmare. 

“Potential.” What did it mean now? Of course, your parents were still holding out hope you’d eventually return to GU. But GU was just like the Waynes themselves: they wanted to portray themselves as a beacon of magnanimity and altruism, but when it came to actually stepping up and doing the right thing, their interests lay solely with themselves and their ability to maintain wealth and power. When the cards were down, a poor scholarship girl from Burnley High didn’t qualify for basic human consideration. And your biggest mistake was believing that they ever would. 

After all the unpleasantness that had occurred towards the end of your first year - the school’s administration “generously” forcing you to take medical leave or be expelled - you’d started to believe you didn’t belong anywhere. You didn’t see a future for yourself anymore. And feeling this way not only made you incredibly sad, but it scared you. 

But all that had started to change since meeting Arthur. Arthur, you imagined, who right now was probably feeling the same way you had on the first day of freshman orientation: Hoping, with the most optimistic part of his heart, that he just might find the love and acceptance he’d yearned for for so long.  

But was life on the other side of those golden gates all that Arthur imagined it could be? 

Suddenly, you felt extremely protective of him. You knew it was inappropriate to eavesdrop, but who were you kidding? Just the thought of Arthur going through something similar to your experience at that school was unthinkable. You tiptoed closer - not close enough to be spotted, but close enough to give yourself the best chance of overhearing…well, spying. 

“Bruce! What are you doing?” Another man’s voice shot out accusingly over the quiet. “Get away from that man.”

Shit. Not good. Your heart started to race. 

Please, you prayed, please don’t be assholes. 

You realized almost immediately how useless such a plea was. These were the Waynes, after all. 

“It’s okay,” you heard Arthur respond. “I’m a good guy.”

Resisting the urge to race to Arthur’s side took every inch of self control in your body. You reminded yourself that he’d wanted to do this alone. You wanted to respect that. Arthur could hold his own. He was a strong person, deep down. And dealing with rudeness was nothing he wasn’t accustomed to.

But if they were complete assholes to him, you didn’t know how much you could tolerate. 

You crept even closer, still hidden behind the giant shrubs that surrounded the estate. The other voice couldn’t belong to Thomas Wayne, you reasoned. Thomas Wayne didn’t have an English accent.  

“Can you tell Mr. Wayne that I need to see him?” Arthur asked. 

At that moment, the wind picked up, compromising your ability to hear as clearly as before. You cursed under your breath, cupping your hand to your ear. 

“...your mother was a sick woman,” you heard the other man say to Arthur in the coldest, most unfeeling tone imaginable. “She was delusional.”

Your jaw dropped. Your right hand fell from your ear and twisted reflexively into a fist. 

“Don’t say that,” you growled under your breath. 

Exactly who the fuck did these people think they were? Couldn’t they put themselves in another person’s shoes for just one fucking second? If the roles were reversed, wouldn’t they want the same answers? Didn’t everyone deserve that? 

Deep breaths, Y/N, you told yourself. Deep breaths. 

“Just go,” the man’s cruel, disdainful voice echoed up the drive. “Before you make a bigger fool of yourself.” 

That did it. Fuck the deep breaths. Fuck taking the high road. And fuck this rude asshole.

The entire world blurred into raging red as you found yourself barreling like a fiery cannonball down the drive to Arthur’s side, ready to fight, to climb those gates like an acrobat and beat the living hell out of that asshole - any anyone else who wanted some, too. 

How dare he talk to Arthur Fleck, your Arthur Fleck, that way? 

When you rounded the corner, you were surprised and more than a little satisfied to see that Arthur had already reached through the gates and grabbed the dude by his collar, holding him in a semi-chokehold. 

“Kick his ass!” you cried out. “Kick his motherfucking ass!” 

The rude man’s eyes darted to you, filled with surprise, confusion, fear. And the inability to utter another word for lack of oxygen. 

Good.

You pulled your right arm back and swung through the gates with all your strength, punching him square across the face while Arthur held him in place. The man’s nose started bleeding and you smiled. Your anger made you strong, increased your strength exponentially in the moments you needed it most. Though you’d never admit it to anyone, it was one of the things you actually liked about this part of yourself that you were supposed to reject, to work so hard to rid yourself of. 

You liked feeling strong in a world where everyone was more than happy to step and walk all over you without a second thought. And you were tired of pretending you didn’t.

Arthur was a slight, diminutive man, but his anger made him strong, too. He had the asshole so tight by the collar, it looked like his face was turning red. 

You were winding up, about to strike again when you suddenly registered the face of the sad little boy from before. Standing off to the side, he was now a very scared-looking little boy; frozen like a little Bambi fawn, eyes wide, terrified. 

Terrified…of you. Of the both of you. 

Those bewildered eyes were enough to stop you in your tracks. All at once, common sense and empathy rushed back into your heart like an ocean wave. As much as this surly jackass deserved a beatdown, you knew you’d never forgive yourself for permanently traumatizing a defenseless little kid. 

Even if he was a Wayne. 

As though he’d come to the same realization at the same exact moment, Arthur released the man just as you stopped yourself from throwing another, harder, right hook. The jerk fell backwards, clutching at his crumpled collar, and Arthur grabbed your arm. Without exchanging a word, you raced back up the drive together, running like two gazelles as fast as your feet could carry you. 

The next few minutes were a continued blur. Wayne Manor receded further and further into the background as you drew closer to the train station. You’d been too afraid to turn back and see if anyone was chasing you, but by now the adrenaline was wearing off, and your legs felt like they could give out at any second. 

“Arthur, wait!” you stopped, breathlessly, reaching out to grab him by the sleeve. Mustering up the courage to look back, you were relieved to see you hadn’t been followed. You’d managed to escape by the skin of your teeth. 

“I think we’re in the clear,” you gasped for air. 

Arthur stopped and turned to face you, panting. “Are you alright, Y/N? Are you hurt?” 

“I’m fine,” you shook your head. “I’m so sorry, Arthur. This is all my fault.”

A confused look came across his face and he took both your hands into his. “What do you mean?”

“I went crazy again. I werewolfed! I didn’t mean to, it's just…” your eyes filled with tears, realizing all too late of course, that the last thing you’d wanted in accompanying Arthur today was to do anything that would ultimately result in making it harder for him to get the answers he needed. 

How could you have let this happen? 

Arthur held up a hand to stop you. “I went crazy first,” he pointed out. 

“Well, yeah, you grabbed the guy,” you conceded. “But I’m the one who made his nose bleed, for God’s sake! I never would’ve done it if I knew the kid was watching.” You shook your head, tears filling your eyes. “I shouldn’t have gotten involved…”

“No, Y/N,” Arthur squeezed your hands in his. “I’m glad you were there. I didn’t wanna scare the little boy, either. Seeing him brought me back to myself. I know what it’s like to be scared at that age…scared and helpless…”

Arthur’s words made the tears you’d been fighting swell over and you fell into his arms. 

“It’s okay, Y/N. Shh, come here.” Arthur pulled you into a tight embrace against his chest. 

“I didn’t mean to scare him,” you sobbed into his shoulder. “I’m a bad person, Arthur. I’m awful.”

“That’s not true!” he protested. “Why are you saying that?”

He stepped back and tried to look you in the eye, but you were too ashamed to face him. The mean, inner voice you’d suffered with in secret since you were a little kid had taken over and had you in its iron grip of shame:

You don’t deserve to be loved.

You’re defective.

You’re worthless.

You’re awful. 

“It’s okay, Y/N,” Arthur whispered into your hair. “I understand. I understand what you’re feeling. But it’s not true. Whatever you’re telling yourself right now is not true.” 

You cried harder into his embrace. You might have known he’d understand. You’d found the one person in the world who felt what you felt - or at least the one person brave enough to admit to it. 

“Please don’t cry, Y/N.” You could feel Arthur’s heart pounding against your ears. “You're not a bad person,” he murmured into your hair. “You’re anything but a bad person.”

“But I messed everything up. Like I always do.”

“You stopped yourself from taking things further,” Arthur pointed out. “We both did. That means something.” 

“But how are you gonna find out if Thomas Wayne’s your father now?” you wailed. “How are you gonna get your answers?”

“We’ll figure something out,” Arthur reassured you. “I don’t want you worrying about that.”

Arthur brought his hands to your face, cradling it. You looked up into his shining, green eyes, tenderness emanating from them. His fingers gently stroked back your hair, wiped away your tears. 

“You need to breathe, Y/N. Can you take a deep breath?”

He breathed with you. In and out. And in and out again. Finally, you felt your pulse begin to slow, the maddening blur of self-hatred and negative vitriol shift from a wild gallop to a trot. It was a small change, but enough to allow you to start feeling human again. 

Arthur stepped back and a small, shy smile spread across his face. 

“Thank you, Y/N,” he said. 

You wiped your nose, bewildered. “‘Thank you’? For what?” 

“For coming here with me. For standing up for me the way you have. No one’s ever done anything like that for me before.”

“But, Arthur, I-”

“If you hadn’t been there for me, I’d be all alone right now,” he interjected. “Like I’ve been all my life. But I’m not alone anymore. Because of you.”

His shy smile shifted into a sly grin. He placed a soft kiss on your cheekbone. 

“I love you, too,” he whispered, before tenderly bringing his mouth to yours. 

Thank you for reading and for all the sweet, encouraging comments! I have struggled to write this as of late, but I'm committed to finishing this story and can't wait to share the rest of it with you. I hope you enjoy this latest chapter.

xx fleckficgirl

💗 Tag List (lmk if you want to be added!): @fallon779 @mama-ferret-art @cherryboss713 @lolwey @jokeringcutio @luckypurins @fruitcupsworld @skaravile @filmsandlovers

💗Master List

[thepinkdreamganjaqueen]

Subway Obsessions FemReaders POV ch3

Arthur Fleck x Fem!Reader POV

Masterlist 🩷

Summary: Chapter 3 of the Subway Obsessions series from Fem Readers POV. Y/N is smitten with Arthur. This adventure takes them on a date for the first time. After spending hours at the diner, they head back on the subway. Y/N does not like the crowded space in the subway train car and gets claustrophobic. How is it Arthur always knows the best way to sooth her?

Warnings: SMUT, NSFW, 18+, MINORS DO NOT INTERACT, piv, unprotected sex, breeding, public exhibitionism, begging, groping, mentions of mental health struggles, mentions of violence (murder), swearing, obsession, self-doubt, fem!reader, romantic smut, fluff (super fluffy)

A/N: Couldn't wait to write this one. Wooo!! Spicy! The subway obsession series continues!!! As always, comment, re-blog, I would love to know what everyone thinks. But please be nice. Enjoy!!

Word Count: 7k

Song Inspiration

SERIES: Subway Obsessions

CHAPTER 3: Easy

"I think I love him," you said aloud, awaiting his call as you do daily. Every second that passed ticking by so slowly. You anticipated this every day, and yet you still awaited so anxiously. It had only been 2 days since you saw him, but since exchanging numbers, you two were all but inseparable. You played that night repeatedly in your mind. You could not believe the ways things went, how far you went. You felt feelings of guilt and shame, but not fully. Only because you had never done something so bold before, so... public! But with Arthur, you did it without question. Mostly, you felt invigorated, energized, happy... and above all, in love. You had only hoped it was not a one-time thing. But you had nothing to worry about as he had so eagerly encouraged staying connected. You exchanged numbers with him that fateful evening. You found each other once more on the train as you had hoped to. That night, Arthur and you rode the last train back together. You could feel yourself falling asleep in his arms as he held you next to him. His arm wrapped around your shoulder, the other on your thigh. You rested your head on his shoulder, then fell to his chest. You were not sure for how long you drifted off for. Him holding you tight, the motions of the train, and having just been thoroughly satisfied played a role you thought. All you know is the way his chest rose and fell as you listened to his heartbeat made you feel whole. It was a space of pure peace. You had been embarrassed, but he was so comfortable and reassuring. Kissing your forehead as you rest upon him, wiping hair away from your face blown across by the wind. You had never even thought about sleeping on the train before, but he made you feel safe and warm. It was too easy. Once you laid your head on his chest, you were lulled to sleep by the soundtrack of his beating heart. It was home. Once you had gotten to your stop, he awoke you with a light kiss. "Y/N, were here," he smiled.

You two wandered for a while, walking the streets closest to your home, not wanting the night to end. You had found a small park nestled in between some of the apartment buildings nearby with swings and stopped there for a while. You talked and swung, enjoying each others company. You kept sneaking in comments about your earlier activities. Trying to get a rise out of him. How he made you feel so good, how he felt so good, how fucking sexy he is. Just pouring positivity into him any chance you got. He made you feel special, and you wanted him to feel the same. You contstantly worried what he thought of you. You by no means perfect or truly healed, he just made you feel that way. He would chuckle sheepishly. He was still so timid, so shy. It was endearing. It only made you want him more. His smile was so kind, his whole being and the air around him just felt better, easier to breath. You stood, getting off your swing, stepping over to him as he slowed, grabbing his legs and leaning in for a kiss. You and him had kissed for what felt like hours, it was only moments. He would grab your face, your sides and your back. His touch, so tender, so purposeful.

As the night went on, you two eventually parted ways. He walked you to your door from the park, a block or two away, holding hands as you walked. He initiated holding your hand and insisted you walk on the inside of the curb. He was literally so cute. He was the most enchanting man you’ve ever met. You two stood at your door, not wanting to leave. You wanted him to come inside, to stay the night, but you knew he had his own responsibilities. He looked at you with a coy smile before suggesting you exchange numbers. The way you fumbled your bag to get your phone out to put his number in must have looked ridiculous, you thought. He seemed not to care, trying to help you manage your things and not drop anything. He put his name in your phone with a little heart, and so did you.

After exchanging numbers, he pulled you in once more for a long, passionate kiss after saying goodbye, his hand at your lower back, leaning you back and kissing you intensely. A newly discovered weak spot you had for him, when he did this, you melted within. You knew you’d see him again but still kissed him as if it was the last time you’d ever get to, wanting to make an impression that would have him coming back. You didn’t want him to leave and felt the pangs of loneliness the second his foot left your porch. He descended the steps, his hands holding yours until the distance became too much, and he let go finger by finger. You watched as he walked away, gingerly giving him a wave. "Be safe, Arthur! Let me know when you’ve gotten home." You called out after him. "I'll text you when I get home and call you in the morning," he reassured, turning back to see if you were still watching as he left. Just like the first night, you helplessly watched as his figure shrunk into the distance.

After he left, you collapsed into your bed in a sigh of content and joy. You remembered fondly how his hands touched your body, each finger, exploring you with curiosity. Replaying the gentle touches in your mind like a broken record and giggling at the thought. You traced where his fingers touched, re living those precious moments. How they tickled you and teased you. How he looked at you so tenderly, his beautiful eyes devouring you, a look of hunger so inviting. He attended to your every need and more in those special moments. You both completely opened up to each other. How he kissed you so gently yet so feverishly, like he needed you, longed for you. Just thinking about it made your hair stand on end, and chills would race up your spine, your heart, so full. You felt wholeness. Not just with him, but just having known him both personally, as a friend, romantically and intimately as a lover. Replaying those moments within your mind almost constantly. Hoping to feel those sensations again. To feel his touch, his breath on your skin, and his eyes wandering your body, gazing into you, loving you. It made you want to wake up every morning. He was your last thought before drifting off to sleep and your first thought as your brain started waking up in the morning.

The days you went without seeing him were dull, empty, and full of anticipation. You were able to hold yourself over knowing you would see him again, and that you get to speak to him daily. Every morning he would send you a text. "Good morning pretty". You looked forward to that text everyday. Knowing he was thinking about you melted your heart, the feeling was mutual. Each day, growing closer and closer to him. You two would spend hours talking on the phone about everything. There was so much to learn about one another, so much to talk about. There was never an awkward silence. You would ask about his day, how he was doing, and when you would see each other again, he would ask the same. Scheduling was a bit difficult at times with him working days and you working nights so you spent a lot of time talking. You didn’t mind, it gave you the opportunity to continue growing your connection with him. Sometimes you or he would be busy with errands or household chores and would just leave your phones on to hear the other person, being there for each other even if you couldn't be physically, but still being a presence. You wanted so bad to see him again. To feel his lips pressed against yours. A deep sense of longing and loneliness filled the air when he wasn’t around. Like a stormy cloud following you around all day. He brightened that for you, made the negativity disappear.

Every time your phone chimed for a message or rang the tune you had set as his, your heart fluttered, and your stomach flipped. Like riding a roller coaster, he made you giddy with excitement and childlike fascination. You always picked up the phone with a boisterous "Arthur!" Unable to contain your happiness. He always laughed and repeated back, "Y/N!" While you both laughed for a moment. Even on days he found it particularly hard to be positive, he remained so for you, you could tell. You could always hear it in his voice underneath. You've gotten to know him pretty well over the last couple of days. It seemed like a short time, but you truly felt like you knew him, like you’d known him forever. A long lost love, like the other part of you. A missing puzzle piece that fit so perfectly with you. When he was upset, you felt it too, and it hurt. You internalized it. Always trying to find ways to help him or make him feel better. A lot of times, it just meant listening to him. Letting him vent. He would follow it up with such praise. Happy you were there to just be there and listen. Something he says no one does for him in his life. You hated how the world around him treated him and the cards he had been dealt. He may have vowed to protect you, but you had sworn to yourself you would protect him as well. Protect his peace, be his peace. When he told you about how he was jumped you all but got up yourself to go find those low life mother fuckers and deal with the problem. It brought out parts of your psyche you had dealt with so long ago. The anger that consumed you was lethal. And you would do whatever you needed to. Healed or not. You wanted to be his safe space, the person he could come home to. No judgements, no anger, no hate, just love, compassion, and understanding.

On the days that were particularly hard for him, you were his person to vent to. No matter what he said or did regardless of the context, you were there for him in any capacity he needed. You would run to him at the drop of a hat if he needed. Sometimes you felt like you needed it too. You wanted to go to him, to sooth him. However he wanted it. But just like you were his comfort, he was for you as well. On bad days for you, you would await his call. Eager to hear his voice, it soothed you. Just knowing the person on the other end of the phone cared enough to listen meant the world. Arthur was your world, you didn’t deny that. Every thought, every decision you made wasn’t done without thinking of him. Would he like this? would he want this? what would he think or say or do in this situation? etc. etc. No decision was made by you no matter how small or simple with considering Arthur.

Today Arthur was free! No booking from the job, and you were off as well. Taking some much needed PTO after your little discretion the other night after not showing up. They’ll live, you think. You'd honestly throw it all away for him, but you know he’d never want that of you, so you settled on trying to make it work. Today was that day. He wanted to take you out. "A real date," he had said. His words surrounded you like an orchestra. Date? You giggled like a little girl internally, practically squealing. You were beyond elated, foaming at the mouth from excitement while lust tinged in your core. You took the time to get ready and find a nice outfit, nothing too fancy. You settled on a fitted black button-up sweater and a matching black pleated skirt and a pair of sneakers. If Arthur was going to put his hands on you tonight, you thought you wanted him to have easy access. Just the thought made your palms sweaty.

That night Arthur had showed up to your door to take you to Paulines Diner with a bouquet of flowers in his hand, yellow lilies tied up with a white ribbon. It looked like he picked them and arranged them himself. How thoughtful! He was wearing his yellow corduroy jacket, a button down white dress shirt and brown slacks with Romeos. His hair fell in tufts of loose curls about his face and neck. His smile beamed at you as you opened the door. You took the flowers and embraced him heavily, breathing a long sigh of relief as you swung your arms around his neck and held him in a long hug. Finally, you thought. Finally, you are whole once again. He was chivalrous in the way he courted you. A true gentleman, pulling out your chair, taking your jacket. You imagined his face between your legs again, this kind face sitting in front of you that was a couple nights ago, ravaging you mercilessly. Heat rose in your cheeks as you sat at the table. Trying to push the thoughts aside for the sake of the date, you continued on. The night went off without a hitch. Arthur was the light you so needed in your life.

The dinner was a mostly pleasant experience. A small hole in the wall type of establishment. A neon red sign reading 'Paulines' in a cursive font lit up the entrance leading to an open dining area with red velvet seats and round brown tables. Bright white LED's lined the ceiling while yellow and white checkered tile lined the floor from wall to wall. It was bright and inviting with the smell of fryer oil and marionberry pie still hanging in the air. You both opted for a booth to sit as the waiter handed you both a menu. At one point during your evening after ordering, Arthurs food had come out wrong. He peeked under the bun of his burger and a look of annoyance then resignation crossed his face. With him being too timid to say anything not wanting to cause problems, you spoke up for him. Telling the waiter he had asked for no tomatoes on his burger, and sending it back kindly. The waiter apologized and came back with the correct order without further issue. Arthurs smile beamed with appreciation as if no one had stood up for him before, however simple of an act it might have been. You smile back and wink as you two continued your evening. The food was great, but you two only finished about half of your meals before splitting a slice of pie. You spent most of the time talking and enjoying each other’s company. You watched in amazement at how kind he was, how he spoke, his cadence and tone, always so gentle. It was freeing being with Arthur. You never felt like you had to hide or pretend with him. Being with him was just... easy.

He talked about work and home life, you did as well. He expressed he felt terrible about making you miss work the other night but you reassured him it was a blessing and only wished it had happened sooner. You could see him blush slightly. Not only is that place highly toxic and full of bullies, it all led you to him. He jokingly said you should quit, not knowing you were truly considering it. He brought about new drives within you, made you feel like you could do anything, pursue new goals, new hobbies, new dreams. He was a space of inspiration, your muse, you loved him. After careful thought, yes, you really did, and only felt that love grow every day. Gazing on as he spoke so openly with you, you were fully enamored with him. As the night went on and his coffee kept getting cold, the two of you opted to leave before closing. Bellies full of food and hearts full of content, a night of endless laughs and genuine conversation. All in all, the best date you’ve ever had honestly. Once outside, the rain began to darken every surface. At first a few spots here and there, but soon it was pouring and you found yourselves running for the subway station. It was a short walk, an even shorter run but he stopped you before you reached the stairs, quickly getting soaked under the downpour. He took the moment to kiss you, pulled you close and pressed his lips to yours. One hand holding yours and the other at the small of your back. He quickly stepped forward dipping you and pulling you back up for another kiss. He then spun you around, watching a smile cross your face, your hair clinging to your now wet skin. You kissed him back, deeply, and passionately. He was nothing if not a complete romantic. He had you swooning. The two of you began descending down the long escalator, stealing a kiss from Arthur as you got closer to the platform. You couldn't go long without touching him in some way, he was irresistible.

It was earlier in the evening when the rain had started, still you had spent a good four hours at the diner with him. Upon approaching the subway platform, you noticed there were a lot more people around. It was about 8pm but there was a lot of traffic. Quite noticeably, a lot of people wearing clown masks. You and Arthur had spoken candidly about the cities unrest and the ongoing protests. You just hadn’t seen it for yourself yet. You two related on a lot of the political stuff going on in Gotham. He spoke about it so passionately, something that related to him on a deep personal level. He was noticeably uncomfortable when you brought up the murders that happened a night ago on the subway, but who wouldn't be honestly. A lot of goings on in the city. You never pushed conversations that were possible triggers for him or were just plain uncomfortable. It was something to be mindful about around him, especially knowing you tend to trauma dump and have no filter. Candid conversations could come across as blunt or insensitive and you wanted nothing more than to make sure Arthur felt he could trust you and depend on your kindness. You tried everyday to be better not just for him but for yourself. Having worked on your own mental health struggles for so long, it was a learned behavior you developed having hurt others in the past. We all make mistakes. But with Arthur, you never wanted to, ever. Even though he was so kind, he would probably forgive you.

You knew there were still things Arthur kept from you, but you didn’t push or expect it from him. You knew in time he would come to open up even more if he should so choose to, but you also understood he is still him, and the personal things he’s dealt with were his stories and his alone. You wanted to give him that respect and just hoped he would trust you when he needed. You always reassured him you weren't going anywhere and that no matter what, he can always come to you in any capacity, and you would never judge him. A mutual respect you both shared. Something he deserves.

You both stepped to the platform for the train heading back towards downtown, maybe Arthur could come in tonight, you planned on at least inviting him in for a drink, a little night cap if you will. Sure, you wanted him intimately again, but you also just wanted to hold him close again, to hear his heartbeat as the air from his nose drifted across your forehead. What a sensation and feeling that had been. How close you had felt to him. You haven't been close like this with anyone in years. You found it a chore to be yourself and open up to new people. Being vulnerable was too scary with a past like yours. But Arthur accepted you with open arms.

A yellow stripe lines the ground two feet away from the subways ledge. Arthur held your hand as you two stood there. You leaned slightly against him, resting your head upon his shoulder. You could feel him rest his head upon your head. Such a welcome touch, so affectionate, so wholesome you thought to yourself. Your heart filled with felicity. A familiar hiss and screech approached from the distance as a push of air whips past you and Arthur. The subway train abruptly hauls to a stop, aligning each car door to each platform entrance seamlessly. Immediately you spot a free seat in the back, you two could share. Most of the others were taken up by people sleeping on their sides, scrolling their phones, or talking with others. Those that weren’t sitting swayed with the subway as they held on to rails and the straps that clung to the ceiling poles. Spaces like this made you claustrophobic. There were too many people for your liking. It made you nervous. You could feel your body tense and heart rate increase. As if sensing your fear, Arthur squeezed your hand and led the way, pushing through the crowd of people lining the subway car, finding the elusive empty seat in the back of the train car.

Arthur gives you the window seat, shielding you from the outside world, once again, your hero. Arthur sets the diners’ left overs they had put in a bag for you two lined with red writing that says 'thank you' on it carefully under the seat while eyeing the crowd. A look of pride perhaps, maybe a look of delight? Crossed his face while scanning the crowd. He wore a devilish smile, only seen by you for a moment before turning back to you. His eyes still kind, searching yours. "Are you okay?" He asked authentically while sliding an arm around your shoulders and pulling you close. "Yeah , you know its just the crowds. Its a little overwhelming is all. So many people" you said in earnest while laying your head on his shoulder. He was looking at you with concern. "I’m sorry" he replied as if he were the cause. You reassured him you would be fine. "What can I do?" He asked. Without thinking you reply "As long as your here with me and touching me, I think I’ll be okay." you looked up from his shoulder gazing into his eyes as he looked back down at you. He scooted closer while pulling you closer to him, bodies flush against one another. You breathed deeply, knowing it was ok, feeling sheltered in his hold. He rubbed circles with his fingers onto your arm where he held you. Massaging you delicately. His gentle touch sent chills up your arm and down your back. You began remembering once again the things that you did the last time you ride the subway with him. You mind fills with the moments you held dear, how his makeup smeared on his face and you not wanting to wash it from yours that same evening. How he looked at you, the way his eyes roamed your body, studying every curve, every fold. How his voice held you, his grunts and moans, a melodic serenade made just for you. But most of all, his touch, oh how his touch made you tingle all over, made your blood rush to your face and groin.

For you, everything about him yelled powerful. Like a sleeping lion, you felt others must be underestimating him, taking advantage of his gentle and kind nature. You took that pain on yourself and made it your daily job to make him feel appreciated, loved, and revered. Yes, he was powerful. He held power over you, whether he knew it or not. You admired him for being who he was in this world, and appreciated him more and more as time went on.

The train swayed, and with it, its passengers. The cabin was dimly lit, the walls grey, painted with graffiti, and the low hum of buzzing lights and the chatter of people. A typical environment indicative of a typical ride on the subway. Except this night was different, you were with Arthur once again. And he was making you feel all kinds of bold. Despite the crowd, you had eased into it, acclimating to this uncomfortable setting. It was actually not as much of an issue you thought it might be. It wasn’t too crowded after the first stop or two. Not shoulder to shoulder like it was, but still plenty of protestors donning their masks with the uncanny likeness of your lover. Not that it mattered just a passing thought. You were too busy thinking about all the things you wanted to do to him, to show him. You thought about your night ahead, how it might end if he agreed to come inside when you invite him in. The train speaker bleats above, stating there was a breakdown or something to that effect. That you would have to get on the next one behind in about five minutes. People began streaming out the doors as an employee walked through, ensuring it was empty. You and Arthur stand up, grabbing the leftovers under the seat. The last two people to walk out.

Unfortunately everyone had already started pilling into the next train, leaving you and Arthur no where to sit. He once again stood in front pushing through a crowd of maybe 6 people in the aisle and found a spot to stand in the back near a ledge with a rail. He motioned for you to stand in the corner as he slid behind you to hold you in place as the train began its course. He had sat the leftovers on the ledge behind the bars, you set your purse there as well. It almost created a wall from the other folks but not realistically. Enough that you felt a bit better, a bit more separate from the crowd. You were still a bit overwhelmed by the amount of people you had to share space with, but you knew Arthur was with you which gave you some peace of mind. Arthurs hand was around your waist with the lightest pressure on your lower abdomen, it felt secure. His hands were balmy, you could almost feel his palms sweating through your sweater. What was he thinking about? You wondered. Were his thoughts as dirty as mine?

The train moved on and people got on and off. Each time the train left the platforms, everyone was in near darkness again, only dimly lit by less than stellar lights that haphazardly lined the ceiling. Wires torn and buzzing as the train swayed and jerked. You loved it when the train would jerk or when it would come to a stop. Each time pushing Arthur into you as you both steadied yourself. He held you still, resting his chin on your shoulder. But every sway of the train made you brush against him in a way that was becoming very noticeable. Maybe you leaned into it every time. Honestly, you couldn’t help it. A nice little excuse to move things along further, why not seize the opportunity? Every time the train car swayed, you would emphasize your movement to shift your stance in front of him, jiggling your cheeks against him, brushing against the stillness in his pants. Every time it happened, he would let out a sharp breath.

You could feel him lean back, bracing himself against the wall by the midway doors that separate the train cars. He gently pulls you back only a step or two and you are flush against him once more. You can feel how hard he is as his cock throbs against your backside. Immediately your face is flush with red. An unknown feeling takes over you, your mind going blank as Arthurs hands begin touching you. The hand he so tightly held you close with was now wandering your chest. Squeezing each mound of flesh through his fingers tugging gently at the fabric. His fingers began pressing through the gaps in the buttons on your sweater, his fingers warm against your skin underneath. He gets his hand through the gaps, popping a button open in the process. He begins grabbing your breasts with his bare hands, your nipples, instantly erect and easily seen through your top. He starts to kiss your neck lightly. Behind your ear and on your shoulders, pulling your hair to the side and kissing your ear lobe. Your eyes dart around the cabin. No one is looking. You watch as people chat, sleep, listen to music and read. All while Arthur is openly groping you in front of them all unbeknownst to them. He knew this train car was a bit more packed and that you’d likely be overwhelmed. He was helping you the best way he knew how and the only way you asked, by touching you.

You turn your head to the side to meet him with a half kiss, sloppy and breathy as he continues to paw at your breasts. One hand ventures down, sliding ever so playfully down your abdomen tickling you. Then, slowly dancing its way up under your skirt. Your breathing hitched as you felt his hand slide down the front of your panties. His hand moved down, trailing your slit stealthily, feeling your wetness. You were dripping with anticipation for him. The moment you felt how hard he was the first time you brushed against him had your mind twisted in a pretzel. Ready to do anything he asked. But he had an air of confidence about him tonight. Pridefully taking what now was his. You offered it so willingly. "Arthur" you panted in his direction. "Please". No sooner than the words left your lips was he sliding his fingers into your cunt. Heat washed over your body, a volcanic flood of passion.

Your whole body lit up at his intimate touch as if it was starved. A slight moan escaped your lips as you felt his fingers penetrate you. Two fingers pulling you to the edge. You leaned back into him, further resting your weight on him, feeling him throb helplessly against you as he fingered you in front of everyone. Luckily for you, your skirt fell loosely over his hand. No one could truly see anything if they looked, but it was painfully obvious what was taking place. You couldn’t see Arthurs face, and so were hoping he was mindful enough to pay attention just in case. He continued, slowly working his fingers into your sopping wet cunt. Your body ready for him, begging for more. You wanted him inside you fully in front of everyone. You no longer cared in this moment. Everyone else just faded away, no one but the two of you mattered.

You could feel Arthur mindlessly grinding into you with every thrust of his fingers. His length pressed up so hard against you. It was not fair. You wanted more, and your body craved him like a drug, and he was teasing you with your fix. With one hand you reach behind you, tracing the outline of his hardened cock against his pants. He hisses at the touch, sucking in air sharply through his teeth and lifting his head up off of your shoulder. You glance back catching his gaze. A look painted his face, a look of skepticism. As if what he was doing was not already in the realms of wildly out there perversions, what was adding in one more thing? Of course you wanted him inside you, but it wasn’t selfish, you wanted him to experience release as well. You imagined it must be painful to be that hard while he toyed with you. You wanted to help him as well, and truly, you could help each other in this moment.

“Arthur, please?” You ask then mouth the words ‘its ok’ to him. His gaze darkens, and his eyes narrow, that look of want overcoming his eyes as they sparkled at you. A smile curls at his lips, and he takes his hands away momentarily, reaching down to undo his pants just enough they won't fall, but enough to unsheathe his manhood. He pushed his hips back slightly, giving him enough room to maneuver. When he pulled down the waistband of his underwear underneath his still belted slacks, his cock flung up standing at attention and pressed against your cheeks perfectly in the center. He used his hands to squeeze your cheeks around his cock as you swayed with the natural movements of the train. You once more lean back into him his cock pressing against your entrance. He hastily reached under your skirt, pulling your panties aside. He then placed a hand on each cheek squeezing them and spreading you while carefully and slowly pushing himself into you. One hand returned to your breast while the other held your hip to him. His hand groping your breasts, one, and then the other while he slowly rocks in and out of you. Careful not to draw any unwanted attention from the other passengers. With your back to him and pressed against him, it probably just looked like you were both standing there…. Well, with his hand in your shirt. But he was careful to move in a way that wasn’t noticeable by anyone in the vicinity. Slowly rocking his hips to and from. You clenched around him, trying hard not to scream out. Small moans escaped your lips, but not loud enough to alert anyone. The sound of the train itself was a loud white nose with unintelligible chatter.

His chin rests on your shoulder, breathing heavy into your ear and whispering praises. He asked if you were ok, if you liked this, and if it made you feel better. You met him with hasty nods as you tried not to scream with pleasure. He was going so slow, so painfully slow. You watched as people talked and laughed, typed on laptops and phones, slept in the corners, people getting on and off the train. You watched as someone ambled out of the seat and off the train right in front of you without looking back. All while Arthur was inside of you. A sea of people going about their daily lives while Arthur fucked you for all to see. He would let out soft little grunts every time he buried himself in you fully. Every push more intense than the last. You hoped for constant stopping and going as the inertia from the brakes forced you on him harder and faster and vice versa when the train would stop or go. You hoped for a rough ride, literally and figuratively. This was so bold of him too, you thought. From what you’ve got to know about him, this didn’t seem like typical baseline behavior, but it wasn’t for you either! Perhaps you brought these traits out of one another, a sleeping confidence only activated by someone akin to your own soul.

Arthurs thrusts became more pronounced. You noticed him bucking harder, still slowly, but he would slam as he went to the full hilt. Causing you to gasp out. His hand immediately shot up from your breasts and covered your mouth. "Shhh, you gotta be good, or they’ll hear us” he whispered in your ear. You nodded to let him know you understood. Of course you did, but it was easier said than done when he was bringing you so close to your end. He held his hand over your mouth, continuing to slam his full length into you. A little more noticeably, probably a lot more noticeably. Deeper and deeper with a blind man’s passion. You reached a hand forward and grabbed a rail to steady yourself. Arthur reached his hands down, grasping your hips tightly and thrusting you back onto him. He fills you completely, a pain that is too pleasurable to measure. He slams one more time, stopping there and holding you to him. You gaze back at him and see him motion to the empty seat in front of you with his head. He sits down somewhere in the middle quickly, his cock red, swollen and flat against his stomach. You follow his lead, and he pulls you on top of him. Away from the sea of faces behind you, you were no longer facing them but facing him. Your main focus, you place a knee on either side of his legs, shifting your panties to the side once more. You grasp him and hold him right below your entrance, he is looking up at you so innocently. His eyes wide, begging for you as you slowly slide down onto him. Taking him in fully, giving him and yourself time to adjust. You think you’d be used to his size by now but this was only your second time making love with him.

You wrap your arms around him and bury your face in his neck, hoping it just looks like you are asleep on him. Hoping no one walks towards the back of the train, hoping no one looks. He takes his hands and places one on each hip, rocking you back and forth on him. His head grinding into your g spot. You follow his lead, rocking and swaying your hips ever so gently and lifting yourself up before coming back down and rocking back again. You kiss his ear and suck his neck, leaving loving marks behind. You whisper things in his ear to tease him, make him blush, knowing anyone could look over and see his face above the seats. You feel his chest rise and fall with each heavy breath he takes. His breathing getting faster and sparser now. Straddling his full length, feeling him fill you, even in a place as public as this, felt so intimate, so private. You could feel yourself approaching the precipice. His cock, hitting the right spot repeatedly in an up and down and forward and back motion. You cooed in his ear singing his praises. Telling him how fucking good it felt when he was inside you, for him to fuck you hard.

You felt waves of pleasure begin to crash, teetering on the surface. You pull back to look at Arthur, his eyes open, feeling you move your head. His head was snapped back, riding the high of pure passion between you two. He was not keeping an eye out, but you couldn’t care less. It looked like both of you were asleep, you hoped. He looked at you, his face full of concentration as you peppered kisses on his forehead and hair. His face grimaces with every thrust between you. As you approached your climax, so did he. The hardest part was not crying out and quietly moaning in his ear as he thrusted, he seed deep within your cunt. Grinding it in with every thrust. You laid your forehead to his, locking eyes as you rocked back and forth with the waves of pleasure that washed over you. Arthur breathed heavily in raspy pants as his cock pulsated deep within you. Your walls clenching tight around him with every pulse that shot through your body making you shiver with each one. Arthur closes his eyes and presses his lips hard to yours in a out of breath kiss. Sloppy, trying to catch each other’s mouths in a kiss while catching your breaths. As the throbbing inside started to subside you remained seated on Arthur. He was still buried deep within you, a spasm erupting every once in awhile sending a shock through him. You had wrapped your arms around his neck holding him close, smelling his essence. The person held in front of you, so vulnerable. It was times like this you could see him clearly, no façade, nothing to prove, but everything to give. So pure of heart and of intention. You glance back, the subway train now nearly empty. When did that happen? Where are we? Did we miss any stops? Shit, you think to yourself. But it mattered not. Tonight, he was coming home with you. You weren’t done yet, unsure you ever would be, but never wanted to be. As you cradled yourself in his embrace and him in yours, you thought right here right now, with him, there was no where else you would rather be. You only wished for the night to continue…

[glitterhammies]

Should i call you Joker?

FLUFF 

You and Arthur had been together for quite sometime now. You knew when he ups and you knew when he had his downs, but right now you couldn't tell what he was feeling. His Mother had died the day before, he was going to be on the Murray franklin show and in between all of this he seemed calm. Even happy. you lay on top of him your head on hist chest listening to his heartbeat "whatcha thinking about" you ask him softly. " I don't know anymore" he replied taking a long puff of his cigarette. " you know you can talk to me Arthur. please just let me know what's going on in there" pointing towards his  head. 

He was silent but not an uncomfortable silence almost like he was preparing himself for what he was about to tell you " you know I haven't been happy one moment of my entire fucking life, but right here right now I feel amazing. Like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders" he was staring into your eyes. " I have you, I'm going on Murrays show I'm now free from my mother, i feel truly happy"

You smiled up at him giving him a slight kiss on the lips which he received and returned" should i start calling you joker? Or is that for only when you have your makeup on" you giggle poking him in the ribs. You knew he was changing. Not just mentally but physically as well. he was becoming more confident, talking without his usual stuttering and getting his way in most confrontations, this was his joker side taking hold. 

You sat up on his chest slowly kissing down his neck " come on baby were gonna need to get ready soon". you were going to be on the Murray franklin show and you both needed to look your best. Arthur had told you his plans for Murray, one which you agreed on. you wouldn't be on stage but you will be watching from the sides and you couldn't wait to see Joker take control of Murray and show him who's the one laughing. 

TIME SKIP 

you were sat on the floor of Arthurs room, makeup scattered all around you, putting on the last final touches of your face paint. You wanted to look the part so you opted for some black white and red face paint to match his. Looking up you saw Arthur at his vanity slowly scrunching up a photo of his mother. Arthur was leaving and Joker was taking full form you could see his confidence growing the more he added the white paint to his face. He looked at you through the mirror smiling at your reflection " come here" he whispered. You approached him putting your arms round his waist looking at both your reflections. " we look good together" you giggle into his ear admiring the clown paint you both had on. " Gotham's not going to know what hit them, well be the king and Queen" Arthur gestured opening his arms like he's welcoming a crowd into his embrace.

That's when you both heard the doorbell ring. you got up to answer it. " wait don't" he called after you. you saw him reaching into his dresser and pull out a pair of scissors, slowly concealing them in his back pocket. " Coming" he shouted looking at you, knowing everything is about to change. 

Thank you for reading my first Joker fanfiction, I know its quite short. Ill promise I will get better but I'm taking small baby steps uploading all my ideas onto here. Joker is like my number one hyper fixation character so expect a lot more stories for him. I love writing Arthur and find it so easy to do. If there is any prompts or ideas you would like to see please let me know and ill be more than happy to write them. 

until next time little Hammies*

[sabbqj]

wip Joker

[strniohoeee]

Hidden In The Shadows Pt. 2

Part 1 Here

Pairing: Matt Sturniolo X Female Reader

Synopsis: Y/N is awoken with fear and feels the shadows of anxiety constantly creeping up on her. Trying to find out more about this town some boundaries are crossed, and some weird things are done….keep reading to find out more📞

Warnings⚠️: Paranoid reader, weirdo locals, talks of cult and rituals andddd that’s about it???😏

Song for imagine: I Walk The Line: Joaquin Phoenix

I keep a close watch on this heart of mine

I keep my eyes wide open all the time

I keep the ends out for the tie that binds

Because you’re mine

I walk the line

Right

Left

Right

Left, no right….

Right again?

Then a left? Fuck I think I’m lost?

It’s so fucking dark, just pay attention

One more left and then I should be

BANG

I jumped up immediately confused, I was blinded by the bright light of the sun and the loud bang of a shotgun?

I opened my eyes fully and felt so confused, I squinted as I looked in front of me

“Matt?” I asked shielding my eyes from the sun

“Don’t worry now darlin they’re coming for us” he said offering me his hand

It was only then that I finally realized my surroundings. I was deep in a corn field, not just deep; but at the core where they usually have the scarecrows. It was such an eerie sight!

Frantically I looked around at my surroundings, I was laying on the ground in my pajamas from the night before.

“What? How did I get here? I’m so confused” I said rubbing my head and looking around

“It’s okay sweetheart, listen sleepwalking is normal” Matt said looking down at me

“I don’t sleep walk” I stated shaking my head rapidly

“You’re in a new surrounding and your body just isn’t used to it, I think you tried to leave but you were still asleep” he said lending his hand out to me

“No you don’t understand, I don’t do that…. I mean how did you even find me?” I asked him after grabbing his hand to lift myself up

“Well you see I went to round up Bertha this mornin’ and I saw your front door open, cept’ you wasn’t round. I called out your name, but nothing. But then I noticed footprints in the dirt down yonder by your driveway. They lead to the cornfield and I yelled your name again, but still nuffin. I rounded up my boys and told them I was going in and I'd shoot off this shotgun once I found you. They’ll be coming in to help us out” he said looking at me with soft eyes

“God this is so weird…. Thank you! I appreciate it. I’m sorry for the trouble this morning” I said to him as I offered him a weak smile

“Nahh don’t worry about it I’m just glad I was able to find you before something happened” he said to me

“Is there something I should be worried about in this field?” I asked cocking my brows at him

“Oh no no it’s just wild animals that are brave and try huntin in the mornin” he said smiling at me

Shortly his friend came in to help us out of the field. They led the way while I was in the back. Matt looked back at me every couple seconds to make sure I was okay. A nice gesture but I still felt super uncomfortable.

“Right, left, right, left no right….right again? Then a left? Fuck I think I’m lost” one of his friends whisper shouted

My head shot up and my eyes widened….that is exactly the last thing I remember hearing…. I immediately became uneasy and anxious

The other boys nudged him and whispered curses at him as they pushed him to walk faster.

“You come to pick corn every couple days and you can’t find your way out?” Matt asked him trying to ease the awkward silence and weird tension in the air

“No no! I’m good don’t worry bout it” he shouted back to Matt as he stomped on the ground, pushing through the field

Leading me out of the cornfield I thanked them as Matt walked me back to my house. Looking down as I walked my feet dirty with dried up mud. And my pajamas caked in dirt….I seemed a bit too dirty for someone who just happened to stroll into a corn field.

Walking me up to my door I turned to Matt and smiled at him, opening my mouth I began

“Listen I’m sorry for the trouble once again, and this isn’t something I normally do like ever; but just know this will never happen again” I said to him

“No worries! Just calm your nerves ain’t nothing wrong with this town to make you so jumpy instantly” he says laughing a bit

“Right….well I’m going to head in now. As you can see I’m a bit dirty” I say laughing

“Of course! I’ll see you round” he says before nodding his head and taking off

Stepping into the house I shut the door behind me almost instantly locking it. I stomped upstairs to the bathroom. I got the shower running as I removed my dirty clothes and looked at my body. I had a few scratches but nothing that seemed abnormal….. was I going insane? Was I now a sleep walker? Or was something darker going on already?

I shook it off and hopped in the shower. Once I was done and got dressed I decided to sit on my couch, chewing at my nails as my leg bounced up and down. This anxiety was clawing at me and I couldn’t stop it.

Pulling my phone out I opened my emails and saw I had a new email from my old professor

Dear Y/N,

I can’t believe you actually bit the bullet and went! This is awesome and I’m looking forward to hearing all about your experiences. I read those articles and it’s actually crazy! I did a few more google searches and even ended up on Reddit. Supposedly Thomas Sturniolo has family out in Pleasant Town. I wonder if they still use the same name and if you’ll ever run into them! And as far as the realtor guy he for sure sounds like a weirdo! Haha, who has that name anymore? But then again it is a small town in the south! Please keep me posted!

Sincerely, Professor Wayne

I sighed with relief at the email back from him, for a split second I felt like I had some normality in my life, and I decided to email him back

Dear Professor Wayne,

Thank you for getting back to me! I’ll for sure keep an eye out for any Sturniolos! I sure hope they don’t go by that same name anymore, but I’m still not sure. I’d have to go to the local library and search the database. Who even knows if they have a library here….sure doesn’t seem like it!

However something so weird happened to me last night. I think I was sleepwalking? I’ve never done that before, but I have no recollection of the night before. I must be an extreme deep sleeper! But how does one end up muddy in the middle of a cornfield and not wake up? Am I being paranoid, or am I right to be a little concerned? I mean this was only the first night…. I think I’m just scaring myself! Anyways, I hope to hear from you soon!

Sincerely, Y/N Y/L/N

Hitting send I sighed as I laid my phone down on the couch. Rubbing my hands through my hair as I shook my head. That uneasy feeling went away as soon as I realized how hungry I was.

Remembering I never got to go out last night I decided to hit the stores today. However I didn’t know where anything was and I was on edge, so I decided to see if Matt was available to take me to the stores.

Stepping outside I locked my front door, and to my surprise Matt was outside tuning something in his car. I looked both ways before crossing the dirt road

“Hey Matt” I said to the young man as his arm cranked rapidly while his tongue was in between his teeth, in a fit of concentration

“Oh hey darlin” he says quickly snapping out of it and looking at me

“I really don’t mean to bother, but I was wondering if you’d be willing to take me to your nearest market so I can get some food” I said to him smiling

“Oh sure thing, let me finish tightening this and we can take my truck” he says smiling at me

“Sure thing” I say backing up

Cranking the wrench again he gave a satisfied face once he realized the piece was fixed. Matt shut the hood…well more like slammed it before dusting his hands off. Using a handkerchief in his pocket to wipe them clean fully.

“My uhh, my passenger side door doesn’t work or else I’d be opening it for you on that side” he stated as he opened the driver side door and looked back at me

“Oh that’s alright I appreciate it” I said as I patted his arm and hopped into his truck

He hopped in after me and shut the door, starting the car up. His tongue stuck out between his lips as the ignition sputtered and then his engine roared to life

“Now that’s what I’m talkin bout” he said tapping the steering wheel

“Did you fix her up?” I asked him as I looked inside the car

“Oh I sure did! 1950 Chevy 3100 . Belonged to my great grandpa and it got handed down to me. I fixed her up nicely. New paint job, new interior and new parts” he said smiling while looking at me

“It’s really nice, to see a car this old running fantastically” I replied back to him

“Yeah, I mean it didn’t need much. My great grandpa got it as his retirement car but then he passed away and it was left to my pops who didn’t care for it, so he left it to me” he replied

“Wow, this is awesome though. I love old cards so much” I replied nodding my head at him

Nodding back we sat in silence, the breeze of the warm air and the sound of a faint country song playing in the background.

“Say you guys wouldn’t happen to have a library here would you?” I asked suddenly

“Oh we do! The smallest library in all of the United States” he said looking over at me

“Fuck yes, is it cool if I stop by there for a bit?” I asked him

“Sure thing darlin” he stated back

About 10 minutes later we were in their “city” which was probably the furthest thing from a city. Everything was right next to each other. Pulling into a parking spot we hopped out. Matt held onto my hand as he helped me hop out of his truck.

Offering a smile as I silently thanked him. Leading me over to the local market they had there. He had gone his way as I grabbed a cart and began to shop.

The buzzing of the old light fixtures and the ominous silence made me a bit queasy. Looking over my shoulders every couple of seconds.

As I was grabbing a couple of basic necessities as far as food I made my way over to the laundry detergent. Scanning what they add and silently choosing my options. I heard giggling to the left of me, so I turned my head, and to my surprise there was a group of kids no younger than 10 looking at me and laughing. Some of the kids even stared at me with wide eyes….almost like they knew me. I offered a polite smile and grabbed what I needed.

I headed down to the frozen section in the back of the store. Looking at the milk options I heard the whispered chatter again and the laughs. So I looked into the glass reflection and saw those same kids staring at me. Getting fed up I abruptly turned around

“It’s not nice to stare” I said to them bluntly

“Ye ain’t s’pose to be here” One taller boy said almost like he was growling at me? Like a dog?

“Says Who?” I asked him cocking a brow at him

“Ye just ain’t” he said again glaring at me with his cold eyes

“You don’t own the town” I said sucking my teeth at him

“Ohh my daddy’s gone’ be real upset when he sees you here” The boy said as his friends snickered with him

“You’re such a little shit” I mumbled under my breath as I turned around and rolled my eyes

“You better get out here before you stuck forever” One of his little friends said

I ignored him, but I couldn’t ignore the chill that ran up my spine at that statement. These people were such fucking weirdos and one more instance was going to be my sign to pack up and leave.

Too into my thoughts, my hand had gripped the handle to the door roughly as I fought with myself. Zoning out completely I jumped when I felt a hand on my shoulder

“You alright?” I heard from behind me

I jumped and gasped before looking over my shoulder, a calmness taking over once I saw it was Matt.

“Yeah…yeah sorry I guess I got distracted” I said shaking my head

“Too many milk options?” He asked laughing

“You could say that” I replied wiping sweat off my forehead

“I’ll wait for you outside you seem a bit on edge” he said to me before backing away

“Alright thanks” I said to him

I quickly grabbed my milk and the last bit of groceries I needed. Heading to checkout before meeting Matt outside.

“Oh darlin you should’ve yelled for some help, let me get that for you” he replied taking some bags from me

“It ain’t nothing, I appreciate it though” I stated smiling at him

Matt and I put the groceries back in the truck, and he showed me to the library.

“Whatcha here looking for?” He asked me as we strolled down the aisles

“Nothing in particular, maybe some history” I said smiling at him

“History?” He asked cocking a brow at me

“I love all things history” I replied back as my fingers danced along the cover of some books

“I hate to break it to you, but uhhh we ain’t got no history books” he said laughing

“And why is that?” I asked furrowing my brows

“About a year ago the whole history section was set on fire by some hooligans, damn near took out the whole back side of the library. Were just glad people was round to help stop the fire” he replied back

“How convenient” I said offering him a tight lip smile

“I mean they’re trying to get that back section up and running again but without the funds we can’t get it properly fixed nor get those books back” he stated shrugging his shoulders

“Man that sucks, but I guess romance books will suffice” I state to him

“Oh I hate that shit, I’ll be outside waiting for you” he said laughing

“Whatttt no Colleen Hoover? No Nicholas Sparks?” I asked him pretending to be offended

“Oh no that’s all you” he said laughing and throwing his hands up

I trotted over to the romance section as Matt left browsing the section before quickly looking for Matt. I saw that he crossed the street and headed into a bait and tackle shop.

Smiling to myself I trotted away from romance and walked around, looking for a worker. Once I found one I walked up to her

“I’m so sorry to bother, but I know this town is full of history and was an important asset to many people, where would I find records of all the important people from this town throughout history?” I asked the worker

“Oh yeah we have a format on our computers it should be open just scroll down to pleasant town history and it’ll show you everything you need” she replied back

“Thank you so much Faye! It was great meeting you” I said to her before walking away

Making sure Matt was still nowhere to be found I rushed over to a computer. I clicked Pleasant Town History. And it was dumbed down into categories. My eyes lit up once I found crop, animal and farm owners. Immediately clicking I scrolled through the names.

“Stacey….Stanley….Stuart……Stu…..Sturnham….” My eyes squinted once I saw the next name was actively crossed out with a black border over the name.

Counting through the alphabet I realized “I” was after “H”…… it only took a few seconds before my eyes widened. Sturniolo? It was gone….scratched from this list?

I went over to homeowners and Sturniolo was blocked out once again, I slowly went to car owners, Chevy 3100 truck….. Sturnham…. And then blocked out again?

The gears started to click and I immediately became anxious. There could be no possible way that….hes Matts great grandfather? Right??

I figured there’s no way Matt could be related to someone like that. I mean yes he was a weirdo, but nothing like that…..

I exited out of everything and quickly walked to the exit. Swinging the door open I slammed into someone.

“Woah little lady where you headed” I heard Matt say laughing

“Sorry, didn’t see you there” I said frantically

“Oh no worries….found what you were looking for?” He asked raising an eyebrow

“What?” I asked as I swallowed thickly

“A romance book? Did you find one you were interested in?” He asked a bit puzzled

“Oh no uhhh none that peaked my interest” I stated smiling at him

“Well it’s almost lunch time, so I’m planning on heading back home” he said to me

“Yes, lunch! Very important, let's go!” I said nervously as I walked to his car

Matt peered at me with a bent neck and furrowed brows, but I just smiled at him as he followed me back to his truck.

Hopping in we headed back home, and to my surprise Matt helped me bring the grocery bags in.

“Here uhh let me make you lunch to say thanks” I said to Matt as I grabbed the loaf of bread from his hands

“Oh no sweetheart, don’t worry bout it” he said smiling

“No please! It’s the least I could do” I said to him nodding my head

“Well alright” he replied giving in

“How’s peanut butter and jelly with some milk?” I asked him

“Sounds mighty fine” he replied back nodding his head

I made our sandwiches and poured us some milk as we sat across from one another. Slowly eating as we occasionally exchanged glances.

“So uh..” I started

“Great sandwich” Matt said smacking his lips to get the peanut butter down

“Oh thank you” I replied giggling as I took a sip of my milk

“You seemed a bit on edge earlier, is everything alright?” He asked me as he took a sip as well

“Oh yeah, just some kids saying weird things to me. Makes me feel unsafe” I said to him

“What did they say?” He asked sitting up in his chair

“That I don’t belong here and I should leave before something happens?” I said rubbing my forehead

“Little bastards….listen don’t pay attention to a word they say. Those little assholes have nothing better to do than pick on people” he replied shaking his head

“Yeah I figured, but with the weird morning I was having I just freaked myself out” I said to him

“Understandable, but don’t worry you’re safe here” he replied offering me a warm smile

“I uhh… i have a question” I said to him

“Spill the beans then” he said ushering me to talk

“You see I did some research today in the library” I said to him

“Ahhh so no romance books” he said laughing

“No, but there seems to be something weird with the information on this town” I said to him

“You were looking up this town because?” He asked chewing a bit slower

“Well I want to learn more about where I’m living” I said in a duh tone

“Okay…” he replied a bit annoyed

“Who’s the Sturniolos and why is that name scratched out of almost all the public records?” I asked him

Immediately I regretted my decision. Something switched in the boy and his eyes grew cold as his nostrils flared. He slid his tongue along the front of his teeth. Inhaling sharply he slammed his hand down on the table

I gasped and jumped at this, my eyes popping out of my head.

“You don’t mention that name, you don’t read about that name and you sure as hell don’t think about that FUCKING NAME” he said yelling the last part

“I’m sorry! I’m sorry I didn’t mean to upset you I swear” I said starting to frantically panic

“That name has destroyed everything good in this town. We don’t claim that man or his bloodline. He’s done unimaginable and unforgivable things” Matt said pursing his lips together and grinding his teeth

“Please forgive me Matt. I meant no harm at all just wanting to know some history. I swear I meant nothing by it” I replied throwing my hands up

“It’s alright, I’m sorry sweetheart for scaring you. I just haven’t gotten over what that evil man did” he replied calming down

“No it’s my fault” I said to him

“It’s not your fault” he replied finishing his milk

“I’m truly sorry” I stated once again

“I’ll meet you tonight at 7pm, I’ll take you to dinner and I’ll explain a little more about that man” he said to me nodding his head

“Oh alright” I said to him nodding my head

With that he put his dishes in the sink and stomped out the house. The rattle of the front door sent a shiver down my spine.

Later that evening I had gotten ready, stepping out my front door and locking it. I turned around to see Matt already waiting by his car for me

Hopping in we headed back into that same area from earlier. Taking me into one of the restaurants we sat for dinner. Using this as my advantage to squeeze some more information out of matt.

“This place is really nice” I said to him obviously lying through my teeth

“Bet it’s nothing like Vegas” he said pushing my chair in for me

“Well not much can beat Vegas, but for a small town this is a nice place” I replied to him

“This is my favorite spot even since I was a kid” he said looking over at me

“Have you always lived here?” I asked him

“My whole life” he said back

“Wow… and you’ve never been anywhere else?” I asked him

“No never, mama says there ain’t much for me to see out there anyway” he said

“With all due respect to your mother…. I disagree. There’s a whole world out there you have yet to see” I said to him

Cracking a smile at me he nodded, his eyes glazing over and shimmering with a saddened look….. one that screams I’m trapped and will never be able to leave

The dinner went well and I learned a lot about his childhood, but nothing about the town. However, that was until we walked the town a bit.

“So about earlier, I just want to say that man was an evil man. He lied, manipulated, stole and killed all for his personal benefit.” Matt said to me

“Did your family have personal ties to him?” I asked him as we walked

“Sort of. He had a farm and he watched my ancestors' animals ... .except instead he killed them. Believing in some weird ritual. Saying how these cult rituals would bring the town fortune” he said shaking his head

“And I’m guessing that was false” I scoffed a bit

“Oh very wrong…. And he was arrested, my ancestors had no animals and because they had no animals they couldn’t make money nor survive really. They spent a lot of time moving around Oklahoma before they could eventually come back here” he replied shrugging his shoulders

“Holy shit…that’s awful” I said exhaling

“It is but hey there’s not much else to do other than move on” he said to me

“Well I appreciate you taking the time to explain this to me…. And I’m sorry for bringing it up randomly earlier…it was wrong” I said to him

“It’s alright darlin” he said smiling and bumping my shoulder with his own

We walked around a bit more before heading back to our houses a little after 9pm. We enjoyed the breezy and quiet drive home.

Parking his car by his house he walked me over to my own house.

“Oh thank you Matt you didnt have walk me over” I stated smiling at him

“I would never leave a pretty lady to walk home alone at night” he said smiling at me

Looking down and blushing slightly I shook my head

“I enjoyed today a lot, thank you very much” I said to him

“You’re welcome sugar” he said back

“I’m going to head in for the night and get some shut eye. I’m super tired” I said yawning

“Me too! We’ll have a good night Y/N” he said to me

“Goodnight Matt” I replied back

Smiling at him I pulled him in for a friendly hug, and to my surprise he actually hugged back.

“I’ll see you tomorrow” I stated pulling away

“Goodnight” he said smiling at me and waving bye

I shut the door and locked it, making my way up to my room and preparing for bed.

Matts POV

Watching the young woman shut the door his smile dropped, and guilt and shame immediately filled his heart and mind. So taken aback by the hug and how nice Y/N was to him today he didn’t know how to feel.

Walking down the steps of her porch, he trotted over to his own house. Slipping in quietly and locking the door behind him. Silently slithering into his room he shut and locked the door.

Putting his pajamas on he laid on his bed as the moonlight lightly casted in through his windows. His mind wandered as he remembered what took place almost 19 hours prior….

Flashback

“Will you shut the fuck up and pick the lock faster” I yelled at my friend

“Well Matt I’m tryin but it’s dark out here” Bo said back to me in anger

“Just hurry” I said through gritted teeth

Within 30 seconds we heard the click and sighed in relief. Quietly ushering into Y/N’s house, we shut the door behind ourselves.

“Nate you pass me the chloroform and Bo and I will bring her downstairs” I said to my other friend

“Sure thing” he said nodding his head

Walking up the stairs we turned to the left and walked to the door that was closed. To our surprise it was her bedroom.

We walked in and I walked up to Y/N

“Y/N! Wake up” I said to her as I shook her

Jumping up out of her sleep she seemed confused and scared, but snapping my fingers I signaled to Nate. Instantly he handed me the chloroform and a rag, dozing the rag in the chemical I held it over her nose. Immediately she fell limp into my arms.

Nate took the supplies out of my hands and Bo came over to help me. Pulling her from under her arms we dragged her down the stairs.

“Leave the front door open so it seems like she left on her own” I said to Nate

“Got it” he replied eagerly

Rushing out the house we dragged her through the gravel and when we got to the dirt road Bo and I stood her up. Leaving footprints from the end of her driveway to the start of the cornfield.

“What about our footprints?” Bo asked me as we approached the corn field

“We’ll worry about that later come on” I said to him

Dragging Y/N into the center of the corn field we laid her down. Arms spread out and ankles touching.

“Are you sure you know how to do a sacrifice?” Nate asked me

“I learned from my grandfather and my dad I know what I’m doing” I replied back to him

“I don’t know this seems like too much” Nate said to me

“You’re getting cold feet now? After all this! You told me you were ready” I stated getting angry at him

“I know, but this seems all too much” Nate stated

“You don’t think I feel the same way? I said squinting at him in anger

“Man I think we should wait” Nate said

“You’re such a pussy” Bo said laughing at the boy

“I’m not ready” Nate said to us

“FINE! FINE! We’ll figure this out for another day” I said standing up

“Because of this chicken shit?” Bo said standing up

“I need everyone to be on board, so if one’s out then we’re all out” I said shaking my head

“Come on man” Bo said shaking his head

“Let’s go! help me get her up, we gotta get her back to her house” I said shaking my head

It started to drizzle as we lifted Y/N up. Holding her by her arms as we dragged her through the field.

“Right, Left ,Right, Left, no right….Right again? Then a left? Fuck I think I’m lost?” Bo said as we trotted through the cornfield

The rain became heavier which made it harder for us to see, and slippery. Our boots got stuck in the wet dirt.

“Fuck it’s dark! I need to pay attention” He said loudly as he wiped the water from his eyes

“Where am I? What’s going on?” Y/N started to say in a drunken groggy state

“Fuck….we gotta go” I said looking at Bo

“Matt? Is that you? What’s going on?” She asked as she tried to stand up

“Shhhh” I said to her

“I’m really scared, what's going on?” She asked starting to cry

“Chloroform now” I said to Nate

Nate quickly wet the rag again in Chloroform and shoved it in Y/N’s face. Choked whines of agony escaped her lips before she fell limp again.

“Bring her back to the center” I yelled over the rain

“What! Are you crazy?” Bo yelled at me

“We have to bring her back, this is all messy! I’ll tell her a good story in the morning. She’ll believe me. Come on” I said frantically

Dragging her back through the mud her pants and feet were completely caked in mud. Shaking my head we laid her on her back again.

She was knocked out cold, but I really hoped she stood that way till I came to “rescue” her in the morning.

The three of us ran back out of the corn field eventually. Not having to worry about our footprints because they would match up with my story of us going on the lookout for her!

Flashback over

Matt was disgusted with what he had done. He was no better than the sick men that once ruled this town. He tried to push the feelings deep down but they kept bubbling to the surface.

Forcing his eyes shut and trying to fall asleep. Praying he could somehow find a way to make this all better….

But for now he was hidden in the shadows of his mind and the only escape was….

You.

The End

This will most def have another part LOLLL, I’m sorry this took me forever to get out, but I hope you enjoyed this as much as I did🤭🖤. I wonder how I’m going to play out the next part. But let me know, did I throw you for a loop with this one???? Anywho we’re almost at 2,100 followers which is absolutely bonkers 🤯. I love yall sooo much 🥹🖤🖤

-J💅🏽

Tags: @kqyslyho3 @gamermattsgf @iloveneilperry

[builder051]

Alphabet Soup— all new q’s!

Send me a letter and I’ll give my opinion on the topic. :)

A is for aloe vera.

B is for beehives.

C is for croutons.

D is for Deadmau5.

E is for elevators.

F is for flunking.

G is for gobbling.

H is for hitmen.

I is for islands.

J is for Joaquin Phoenix.

K is for Kellog’s.

L is for lamentations.

M is for mistakes.

N is for non-participation.

O is for overdose.

P is for penguins.

Q is for quality.

S is for seahorses.

T is for tug boats.

U is for untying.

V is for vaping.

W is for whatever.

X is for x-ray.

Y is for yodeling.

Z is for zebras.

[jokerownsmysoul]

red color soul

Summary: Arthur can’t find his blazer, once he finds out that you’re wearing it while you’re sleeping he realizes that his blazer symbolizes for both of you much more than you may think.

Content: soft, lil angst 

Warnings: heavy thoughts 

Word count: 2300

ask: one night, Arthur can't find his Joker red jacket. He's searching in the whole apartment and starts feeling grumpy because he has to go for buisness. He try to stay quiet when he come to the bedroom to continue his research, and then, he find it. Reader is sleeping in the bed, wearing his jacket

A/N: I got inspired by this ask, it turned out to be less fluff than expected, as usual lmao angst owns me

Tag list: @arthurflecksgirl​

A/N: english is not my first language so I apologize for any typos, I’m still learning.

this pic makes me feel things

Arthur couldn’t figure out how long it had been since he started looking for his red blazer, the only thing he knew was that it was late, very late, and his nightly business that night weren’t made to wait. He struggled walking around the apartment with a quick and nervous pace, little shine of sweat beaded his forehead which he kept frowned in a grumpy expression. The more he looked for his blazer, the more impossible it was to find it and the darker his mood became. He checked again in the living room for the third time and his gaze froze when he looked what time it was, again. By now he had checked everywhere and he wondered how a blazer could disappear in an apartment as small as yours. He was sure to have left it hanging it on a hanger in the living room that morning. The hanger was in the living room as he thought, but it was empty and there was no trace of his blazer.

All of a sudden it was as if someone had blown a thought into his mind just as you blow a kiss to his lips from afar when he realized that he had not yet checked in the bedroom. He opened the door, careful not to make it creak as he walked into the bedroom slowly, knowing you’d been asleep for a long time and he didn’t want to wake you. With delicate and almost imperceptible steps did he wandered around the room in search of his blazer, as much as it was possible to look for a blazer in the dense darkness of the night and with the light off.

As soon as his eyes began to get used to the darkness he continued the research as thoroughly and robustly as possible. He checked the closet, his nightstand, and literally every point of the room, panting here and there and suffocating his frustrated puff down his throat to make as little noises as possible and keep you from waking up.

He’d given up hope by now when he sat in the chair turned on you, right next to your nightstand. He put his hand on his hair nervously, making his locks bouncing on his shoulders gracefully but reflecting all the tension he was feeling at the time as he looked at an undefined point in the floor, revisiting in his mind the actions he had carried out, recreating the events of that nights and trying to figure out where he had put his blazer.

It was not a matter of blazer per se. His frustration wasn’t born from owning one blazer over another, but from what the blazer represented for him. Arthur used his red suit to protect himself from the world as if it were the armor of a knight going into battle. He used his suit to dress his pain of elegance, thinking that perhaps, just perhaps, a red blazer and a waistcoat would make his pain more elegant and beautiful to look at. He wanted to make his pain and himself beautiful because people, perhaps, in this way would drawn their attention to his pain, and maybe he would finally be seen. Arthur used his red suit as a shield necessary to face the world and was afraid that that night the world would suck him up and he wouldn’t be able to face him if he didn’t find his blazer, that damn blazer.

What would people think if they saw him without it? Would they have recognized in him The Joker with the red suit on which the citizens of Gotham had built false news and anecdotes, and an identity based on a terror and a fear that Arthur had never wanted to be related to his person and that never belonged to him? They would have pretended to respect him or, without his red blazer, they would no longer recognize in him the red personality that had been affixed to him without his consent? They would have resuming to see him only as Arthur, the unseen, the unloved, the unconsidered Arthur, who had always been and still was? He had never been seen, not even as The Joker. Actually, he had never been as unseen as he was since The Joker came out. People didn’t see him but a spooky identity built by their own hands.

Arthur felt his mind burning in a fire as it intertwined his thoughts. The only thought he could recognize was his need of you. Even when your mind wasn’t alert and you were sleeping you could still comfort him even only with your breath reminding him that you existed, and soon after, when even the last hope of using his memories to figure out where his blazer was had vanished, did he dragged towards you to watch you sleep and seeking comfort in your figure. Not even his most overwhelming state of soul would have been enough to keep him away from you and wrapped in the depths of his exhausted mind.

He stretched his arm out towards you to stroke your hair gently, savoring the softness of your hair scattered on the pillow against his slightly sweaty palm which still reflected the mark of his previous gloominess. He followed the curve of your body up to your shoulders when he froze as soon as he felt a familiar sensation against his palm and his fingers touched a fabric he knew well.

He leaned forward towards you to look closer and better at your figure wrapped in the dark as if it were a blanket and helped by the moonlight that created a white patina on the edges of your figure he noticed you were wearing nothing less than his blazer. 

It felt like as if someone had absorbed  with a sponge his heavy thoughts that he had just before, which seemed to have disappeared at the very moment when Arthur couldn’t hold a giggle at the thought that in all those hours he spent searching for his blazer it had always been there, under his eyes and worn by the most important person in his life, and as he well remembered he had never taken it off the hanger in the living room. He was surprised, in fact, as he thought that he should have searched the bedroom from the beginning.

He breathed a sigh of relief glad that he had finally stopped his nightly searches throughout the whole apartment and an ironic groan flashed into the slit of his parted lips as he realized that all those thoughts that had held his mind in a fist had been futile.

All of a sudden the rush to go out that he had until a second before seemed to have vanished into thin air. The sight of your sleepy and relaxed face as you wore his blazer was enough to erase from his soul any trace of frustration that he had just before, as it were erased the business that awaited him there very soon. He wasn’t even tired anymore. The only emotion he was composed of and felt at that moment was the most powerful feeling that he could ever live in his life, the love for you. 

The love you shared was such an intense feeling that it not only bound your hearts, but every component concerning you and on which the footprints of your souls were carved, like an ancient vase on which letters have been engraved and welded which symbolize all that the vase is and represents.

Even his fears, along with the frustration felt just before, had vanished. Going out without the red blazer for that night would not have been that bad, after all, not if it was worn by you and would have kept you company in your dreams while he was away.

Arthur didn’t like to be distinguished from the others and keep unchanged the red identity that other people had built over time in his place and that by now everyone knew. But ironically, it was only with the Joker’s bright clothes that he could blend into the world without feeling naked and vulnerable. Therefore he loved to wear the only armor he found comfort from, but more than anything else he loved you, even more than the identity that weighed on him, even more than the strength his suit gave him, more than anything.

And he loved to be loved by you, who loved him so much that you literally took every opportunity to feel him as close as possible to your body as it was to your heart. And you really did loved his red blazer as you loved to surround yourself with red color which reminded you that the love of your life lived right next to you, and that your lives were been able to weave, intertwining one another like two threads forming a knot that cannot be broken. You loved his red blazer and you would find comfort in it in many other days and nights when you knew Arthur had buisness and you needed to feel him as close to you as possible in every way you could ever find.

All that time he was sitting in the chair next to your nightstand, taking you all in. He was sure that that night, by going out without his jacket, he would still find within him the same courage that his red jacket gave him, because it was the same courage that, originally and more than anything else, you had always given him every day in the first place.

A sleepy sob came out of your lips when Arthur got up from the chair, who stood still in front of you realizing you were awake. You were so connected that even as you slept you interacted with each other through long communication between the dream world and the waking world, that’s why your body had perceived he was moving away from you. You raised your head, your look disoriented by your sleep and your ruffled hair, your lips curled in a sweet pout which made him smile. “Are you leaving?” You asked, Arthur couldn’t ignore the vague sadness that reigned in your voice. “I'll be back soon, sweetheart. Promise.” Joker’s silhouette was outlined as a black shadow a few centimeters from you, but you could distinguish through your eyes totally accustomed to the dark and through the moonlight which enlightened his body that he was wearing his classic green shirt and his unmistakable yellow waistcoat, but not his blazer.

It was at that moment by looking at his dressed figure that your mind, still wrapped in the dream you were having, regained consciousness, waking up as if until now you were still dreaming, and reminding you that his blazer was on you. “You’re forgetting your blazer, honey. I’m wearing it.” You lowered the volume of your still hoarse sleep voice by uttering the last words with a feigned childish attitude, confessing that you had worn it without him knowing it as a baby who was caught in the act and admits their faults, but still they don’t regret it at all.

You started to shake your arms and wriggle under the blanket to take off his blazer and give it back to him, but Arthur made an amused laugh as he lowered his back and placed his hands on your shoulders to relax your movements and prevent you from taking it off. “I know. Keep it.” He brought his head closer to yours to lay small and soft kisses on your forehead, one after the other and thoughtfully as a distant farewell. Every time he left the apartment those rooms were infused with melancholy, you would have preferred not to spend far apart even half of your short breaths. “I’ll be the one who dresses you very soon.”

You smiled sweetly purring inside his blazer that still smelled of him, its scent was blended with the one coming from his own body. He was the only thing you could smell and the only smell you needed to actually breathe as a human being. He laid a kiss on your lips before he moved towards the door, but you drew his attention as he was opening it and before he could leave the room. “Are you sure you don’t need it? I know how significant your blazer is to you.”

Arthur turned to you, his hand still on the wood of the door and a heartfelt smile on his face. “You need it more than me, Y/N.” He said gradually, letting those words dance in the mystery of a room darkened by night, as he turned slowly enough to notice the grateful smile on your moonlit face and fast enough for you to see his figure mingle with the darkness of the living room and see him disappear. You couldn’t wait to be dressed with his body just like his blazer was doing in that moment.

To Arthur they had never been just clothes like had never been just clothes for you. To him they symbolized the strength and worth that he had always sought and that he wanted to be able to find even with his ordinary clothes, the clothes of Arthur. To you, instead, they were the incarnation of his soul and never, never, would you have wanted to feel his soul away from yours, especially when you weren’t physically close.

It’s curious how a simple red fabric can mean so much and how it can represent two different identities, the Joker feared by Gotham and the man everlastingly loved by you, and how a simple blazer can bring relief and love just by feeling the fabric in touch with your skin.

[arthurflecksgirl]

Take that pain away

Fluff

Arthur x Reader

Word count : 1300 ish

Warnings : None ( Except mentions of a mental hospital)

Youˋve been staring at the blank page before you ,for who knows how long. It must have taken you all morning to come up with a silly little poem that clearly wasnˋt good enough. Nothing was good enough to express your love for him. Not even the most marvelous poems of your favourite writers could tell what you felt when you held him in your arms. You brought the pencil to the paper and wrote „When Iˋm holding you, Iˋm holding my whole world. And when the world is getting too mysterious to understand, I know that we still understand each other. Sometimes I think that I understand you better than myself. Itˋs like my mind was living inside your head before it got planted into me. And I let you bloom inside of me. My sunflower, my light.“

Before you put the page into the burgundy colored envelope, you drew two little stick figures holding hands but not without adding a red dot for a clown nose to one of them. You knew that Arthur loved these small details and since he was a child at heart, those two lovebirds would put a smile on his face.

His face! Oh how you yearned for the moment youˋll be holding his face between the palm of your hands again. It has been too long. The last time you felt the fine lines of his crow feetˋs beneath your fingertips, while you kept brushing your thumb over his beautiful yet tired face, wasnˋt how it used to be. Arkham state hospital was not a place to feel homey in. Even though Arthur was sleeping in the same bed for weeks, the sheets never smelled like him. His soft curls didnˋt smell like his Prell shampoo and even the brand of the cigarettes he smoked in there tasted so differently. It felt like glimpses of Arthur were taken from him. Waiting to find their way back home into your arms.

A look at the clock woke you from your daydreams. „God, itˋs time“ you said to yourself „Itˋs…..time!“ A smile crossed your face as you got up from Arthurˋs couch to get your keys. The act of smiling alone felt like part of him was there already. You couldnˋt even remember feeling a smile on your face. Not like that. Not a genuine one.

You couldnt even remember how you got on the bus, time was moving differently now. It had to. Every minute you had to wait until you could pick him up at Arkham was a minute too long. Your fingers kept tremblin while you watched out the window. Gotham city passing you by like all of this was nothing. This big city, the wide sky above, all those strangers and buldings. It was all non existing. The only thing existing was the vision of Arthurs head resting on your shoulder at the bus ride home.

Arthur was talking to one of the doctors when you arrived. All you could see from here was his back. His tiney frame which, no matter how fragile it might looked, always seemed like it was about to start dancing any second. The slightest movement coming from him was an act of art. Naturally like a waterfall. Step, step, step, floating into a world of his own.

He nodded, nervously running  his fingers through his slick back hair. Some dark strains almost reaching his sharp shoulders. You could see his blades stricking  through the fabric of his shirt. Oh! To touch him. To feel his bones against yours, his breath hot against your hungry kisses. To let his body fill your arms and let your heart overflow with love!

„Y/N“ he  whispered as he turned around to see you. A whisper that felt like a scream to him. A scream for love. „My god! Youˋre here. Youˋre finally here…. I was….getting nervous…I know you arenˋt even late but…Youˋre never late. Iˋm still getting nervous. Iˋm sorry Y/N…. Iˋm not makeing any sense do I ?“

Tears streamed down your face as you held him close to your heart „Arthur….“ .A name breathed like a prayer. Ghosting along his hollowed out cheeks. A slight sensation tickled your chin. He didn´t shave for three days. „You are making sense. You always do. You do to me.“

Arthur pressed his forehead against yours, eyes half closed. Seeemingly sleepy but blissed out.

„Letˋs go home“ he mublmed in his drowsy voice. „I canˋt wait to be home with you“. A shy smile appeared  when you grabbed his hand. Both of your hands a shaky mess. But somehow calm and peaceful inside. Like a thunderstorm harmonizing with the peaceful noise of pouring rain.

Arthur didnt let go of your hand once when you were sitting beside him on the smelly bus. He took the window seat but didnˋt even take a look at the city he was born in. Heavy eyelids being kept close as he rested his head upon your shoulder. Nothing could ever compare. The change in his breathing was noticeable on the sensitive skin of your neck. Arthur falling asleep on you like that was a gift, knowing he was always having troubles sleeping. Even sleeping pills wonˋt free him from insomnia. But now with you, he was at ease. For a moment , right there is a noisy city bus, he was allowed to rest savely upon your shoulder. And you knew this was your purpose. To be his rest. His save place. Now and forever.

Your hands unlocked when you entered his apartment. What a cruel act to unlock your sweaty palms. What a relief to watch him walk into the kitchen and drink a glass of water.

You stood there, in the rounded out doorframe, so unapologetically in love with the man in front of you.

His emerald eyes pierced you through and through as he chugged down the water.

„A penny for your thoughts“ you whispered, slowly walking up to him, reaching for his waistband.

 Arthur put the glass beside to hold your face between his gentle hands. Something he does when he was about to kiss you. Is it just you or did his eyebrows look even darker than usual?  

You let your other hand brush over the dark circle beneath his eyes. Was that a tear? He was so beautiful, so pure and raw… so real.

To be inside him now. Oh to switch bodies and know how it feels like to be and breathe in his body. To become him entirely.

Arthur slipped his tongue between your lips as he whimpered sweet nothings in your mouth. You tasted everything he ever felt. You became it.

He still didnˋt answer your question.

A penny for his thoughts.

The world for his thoughts.

Arthur led you to his worn out couch.

Those sheets. His skin. His bones pressing against your ribs. This was home.

The letter you wrote for him was still lying on the table. He will read it tomorrow, after youˋve been making love all night. After you illuminated him from the inside and after he made you the person you always longed to be.

„My love“ you  whispered between the kisses „I missed you so m….“

„Shhhht…“ he breathed heavily while you gently pulled his pants down.

„Just…mmmhh…just…“

You loved him.

You loved him so much as his muffled voice whimpered

„.please take that pain away...“

 

And while you pulled him as close as your physical bodies would allow, you felt his mouth trembling.

„I will, Arthur. I will…"

...

Tag list

@jokerownsmysoul @ajokeformur-ray @jokerislandgirl32 @jewelzcullen @iartsometimes

[joaquinfeed]

Taking Arthur to the Drive-In For the First Time Might Include…

Him not caring what movies you see, just so long as you’re together.

Getting there extra early because he’s afraid you both will miss a part of the “experience” if you’re late.

Buying one of every snack because he can’t choose, and you not being able to say no because you love him.

Him trying each snack once before the movie even starts because he “just can’t wait.”

Slight bounces in his seat as the drive-in screen lights up and the movie starts to play.

Movie or cuddles? Movie or cuddles? He doesn’t know which to focus on.

“Did you see that, y/n?” And a million other questions because he’s just so happy to be there, and he wants to make sure you’re paying attention too.

His head making its way into your shoulder, and your hand ending up in his hair.

That not lasting long because he’s back to leaning forward in his seat to catch every last bit of the movie.

Him deciding to lace your fingers together instead since he can’t help but have contact with you.

Joking throughout parts of the movie to make the other person laugh.

Arthur blushing when a character on screen kisses the other, and he can feel your eyes watching him.

You gesturing Arthur closer and telling him you’d like to recreate the scene with him later.

Arthur blushing again.

A scene triggering a laugh attack, and you holding him close as he calms down.

Him kissing you because he’s just so thankful that you’re still with him.

“I think I bought too many snacks.”

Him falling asleep on the way home, and you trying to drag gently guide him out of the car and into his apartment building safely.

Him murmuring that he loves you as he pulls you into his arms once you reach his bedroom.

You asking if he had fun at the drive-in the next morning, and him nodding and shyly asking if you both could go again soon.

This was a really random post that I just threw together in 5 minutes. It wasn’t supposed to be groundbreaking writing; I was just putting some of my cutesy thoughts down. Plus, I was procrastinating on doing work that needs to be done soon. I will be finishing up and releasing some of the requests you have been sending in soon. I have spring break the week after next from uni, and I’ll be posting then! ❤️ I hope you all are having a good weekend. Pray for Ukraine.

[ajokeformur-ray]

To spend a life with you // Arthur Fleck x gender neutral reader (no pronouns used).

Summary: You and Arthur both lead busy and chaotic lives and it's exhausting. But you work hard to make it work between the two of you, pouring over your schedules like they're ancient tomes to find pieces where you two can meet. It's not easy, nothing worth doing ever is, but it's made more bearable knowing that Arthur will be there; whether in a minute from now or an hour, he will be there.

A/N: Dedicated wholeheartedly and with much love to both @iartsometimes and @jokerownsmysoul. I've gone through several months of a dry spell for Arthur and it got so bad in terms of a lack of motivation that I've written, saved and then deleted multiple "I'm done" posts while I contemplated quitting writing for Arthur. But my conversations (sadly few and far between right now; miss you ladies and everyone else lots!🥺) with Fla and Tanya have helped to kickstart my inspiration and tbh my own physical exhaustion with my new lifestyle has made me feel even closer to Arthur; so much of my routine makes me think of him being with me as I go through it all and so this piece was born.🥺 I hope you both enjoy and thank you so much once again for helping me; I kept my wanting to quit on the down low and sought out help from the both of you without saying specifics, so you both helped more than you know!!😍💗🙏

Word count: 3, 215.

Your alarm, shrill and obnoxious, shattered the tranquility of your shared bedroom in the very early morning. You groaned and turned your face into your warm pillow, away from the penetrating noise and back into sleep. Several emotions were so prevalent as you heard your voice for the first time this day as if from the ears of another that it made you want to cry. Frustration; genuine exhaustion, for it felt as though you had only just crawled into bed; weariness which you felt within your very bones; despair...

...On and on it went, and all the while, you just wanted to sleep.

But the world had other ideas for you, worse ideas, just as it always had and undoubtedly it always would.

Such was life.

You groaned again and burrowed into the warmth right in front of you, a solid wall which snaked its thin but deceptively strong arms around you and tugged you impossibly closer, the cool tip of its nose nuzzling into the junction between your neck and shoulder, its warm and dry lips pressing lazily at the skin exposed to the cool Gotham air. The apartment was very poorly insulated and the water-damaged walls were thin, so always was it cold, even with the heating on high (a rare occurrence, so high was the cost of living and never did the hourly wage increase).

Your alarm continued to blare and the wall rumbled with a throaty groan as an arm moved from out beneath you and smacked blindly at the alarm until the fucking thing was silent, and tranquility once again descended, you could feel yourself falling asleep again, you were going to -

You were shaken gently by the wall and you blearily opened your eyes to see Arthur's beautiful visage right before you. Your breath caught in your throat to see those gorgeous eyelashes framing the emeralds you knew and loved so well, those romantic dark curls which framed his forehead like curtains, those lips which most usually addressed you with nothing but reverence... oh, but you loved him.

"No, honey, you can't fall back asleep. You have to get to work." You groaned and turned away from Arthur, which made him giggle. The sound was high-pitched and punctuated with small hiccups, which melted your heart. He, too, was absolutely exhausted, but just like you, he had no choice. "I know," He murmured. With anyone else, you would have almost certainly taken his words as nothing more than empty platitudes, but with Arthur, with Arthur, you knew that it was so much more than that. He meant every word he said to you, especially in this context, "But it's just one day. We can do it." He patted your shoulder lovingly, firmly in a final gesture to not fall back asleep, and pointedly rolled out of bed with a very real groan of weariness.

The sound of Arthur's truest depth of exhaustion seemed to only highlight your own to you all the more and the need to cry increased, but you swallowed hard against it, anxious eyes flicking to the alarm clock on Arthur's bedside table; the side closest to the door so that he could protect you if a perceived threat got into the apartment. Anxiety and dread was settling in above your head much like the dark clouds already looming over the equally dark and dreary horizon of Gotham. Everything was grey; the sky, the concrete, the buildings, and even the cars seemed dull in colour. You were so tired within yourself that you felt like you were already asleep, despite the fact that you were following Arthur's lead and crawling out of bed... the one and only place you most wanted to be in today.

"It's always 'just one day'," Your grumble made Arthur smile, though it wasn't a happy gesture. Oh, help you, but you almost pouted; you were just so tired and you wanted nothing more than to sleep but you couldn't. You couldn't and you hated it; you knew that Arthur did as well and somehow did that only make you more frustrated. You could handle feeling this way, but seeing Arthur experience it too made your blood turn to lava. You huffed at Arthur's weary, knowing smile and one shouldered shrug; it was a gesture of understanding, of sympathy, and you recognised parts of yourself within Arthur. Both of you were in the very same boat and that fact weighed you down just as much as it encouraged you to get ready for work. It was so similar to how Arthur made you feel; he could make you cry in the same moment that he could make you laugh, so multifaceted was he and so interconnected were the two of you.

It had always seemed to be that there was a string which connected your emotions; when Arthur was sad, so were you, when he was happy, so were you, and the same was equally true in the reverse. Indeed, as you and Arthur danced around one another in the small, cramped but well loved apartment to get ready for the undoubtedly stressful day ahead of the both of you, it seemed as though there was a string between your bodies, too, for rarely did you have to verbally communicate your intentions to move throughout the space of your home; you both just knew what the other was after and where they were going and it aided the both of you in getting ready for the day.

Far too quickly were the both of you out of your safe haven from the cruel city. Arthur ushered you out through the front door, large chips of paint flaking off and landing on the neglected and stained carpeted floor as he did so, and he raised his eyebrows at you in a here we go gesture as he locked the door, tried the handle, unlocked it, re-locked it, tried the handle, and nodded to himself in satisfaction. He was good to go physically and so were you, but mentally? Oh, neither of you had left the bed. You were right beside each other the entire day with no responsibilities, duties, anything to tend to, it was just the two of you. Alas reality was harsher, unkinder, but Arthur's hand held yours tightly as together you walked to the bus stop which would take the both of you to work.

There was a comfortable silence between you, both of you well aware of your own and the others' exhaustion, and periodically would Arthur look over at you, his green eyes gazing at you in concern, his dark curls bouncing gently across the tops of his yellow clad shoulders as he did so. His hand would squeeze yours and, help you, but even in your soul deep exhaustion, you couldn't fight your smile, and you squeezed his hand back just a little harder.

I love you.

I love you too.

Your bus arrived ten minutes before Arthur's, as it did every morning, but you didn't let go of his hand until the very last moment; there were no whispers of love. The cold, rainy bus station full of other people wasn't the place for such sentiment; Arthur only bid you goodbye with a tight lipped smile, his fingers sliding out of yours slowly, slowly, and then all at once. It was the way you fell asleep, though a key difference was that reality was even better than your dreams when you were with Arthur. He was everything you had never known you needed until you did, and you were certain that Arthur felt the very same way about you. You allowed yourself to shed a few tears on the way to work, missing Arthur even before the bus turned the corner out of sight. It's all right, Y/N, Arthur will be waiting for you at home. Just one day. And then Arthur. Was the day's mantra, though as the hours crept by, all that remained of the almost prayer, so much strength did you derive from your love, was Arthur's name. You held onto it and everything that he meant to you with such fierceness that the cool ghost of Arthur's fingers threaded through yours kept you company throughout your work day.

It only made you miss and love him more.

Finally, finally, your shift came to a close and you were able to feel a small measure of relief even though your exhaustion, which had gotten exponentially bigger over the course of the day, as it always must, as you clocked out and made your way to the bus stop which would take you home. It was always so very difficult for you and Arthur to align the trips home; the bus stop was the same but the timing was always different. Not to mention, if one of you had to go to the pharmacy or grocery store after work, there was an even bigger gap between leaving work and coming home.

Through every rise and fall, the physical and emotional tolls of the lifestyles you both led always, always, remained the same; you were each other's balm against the world. On the bus did you slip into a daydream so blissfully thick that your journey home felt like just a few seconds; you felt almost dizzy as you got off the bus, your bags in tow and your body so heavy that every step felt like there were weights attached to your lower legs. You sighed and swiped a hand over your face, stepping out away from the bus stop and towards the street, where people were almost pushing past each other in their haste to do whatever it was they were doing. Everyone had a life as interesting and as complex as your own and it baffled you sometimes to think on it; you had always been a people watcher but tonight, you were just too damn tired.

You were so tired, in fact, that you almost completely walked past someone dressed in a faded yellow hoodie; the only splash of colour in a physically and emotionally grey city.

"Hey." Oh, but that soft rasp had you turning back so fast that your head spun and the ghost of Arthur's hold on you this morning, which had faded over time but you could remember it so vividly that during the day you liked to think that he was still holding your hand, returned in full swing as he gripped your fingers with his own. You smiled, you smiled, and Arthur's own lips turned upwards, as if a string existed between your bodies. You had always been very emotionally connected and you had gotten close to one another within just a few weeks of meeting one another all those years ago. When you knew, you knew.

"Arthur!"

All at once, it was like you had drunk a mug of coffee as energy coursed through your veins. You pressed a kiss to his cheek and the way his skin sunk beneath your lips made you smile against his face, and Arthur hummed contentedly as he slid a cigarette between his lips. You took the hint and pulled away from him, squeezing his hand lightly before you let it go so that he could flick his lighter and ignite his cigarette. Arthur inhaled deeply with a noise of bone deep satisfaction and tilted his head up, up, exposing the long column of his neck as he exhaled; not wanting to blow it into your face. Always so considerate was he, even and especially during times he felt as though he was at his worst. It was one of the many things you admired him for; being so kind even with everything he went through without reprieve, and you tried to emulate a similar trait within yourself when you found the energy to do so. Kindness was a choice, one which had to be consciously made whenever the opportunity to do so arose, and it wasn't always easy, but it was right.

Arthur taught you lessons about yourself and the world every single day and he didn't even know it, try though you might oftentimes to express the truest extent of all that he had done and continued to do for you.

As the both of you reached the stairs, that long flight which made your knees, back and feet ache before it brought you closer to the apartment complex, closer to home, you squeezed Arthur's hand tighter and began to think back on something you had seen written in his battered journal one time several months ago; step step step step step step step step step step step step step step step. You hated those fucking stairs, but Arthur's hand in yours helped you to weather each step. You could see Arthur mouthing that same one word to himself over and over and over, like a prayer, until he reached the top of the stairs with you beside him, where you belonged. He swayed slightly on the spot, his body simply not enough to cope with the demands of his daily life, and concerned did you reach out a hand to steady him, your fingers curving around the crook of his elbow. You had to step to the front of him in order to accommodate this, for your other hand was still tightly clasped in his. You were practically embracing him, holding his body up with your own.

“Are you okay, darling?”

Arthur nodded, but you could see that he wasn’t.

Arthur was anything but okay.

Luckily for the both of you, the apartment building wasn’t too far from the stairs, just around the corner, so you kept your hand in him while you walked home together, though your other hand dropped to your side, but outside of your pocket in case Arthur needed you to help him to regain his centre of gravity again. You doubted he had eaten since breakfast this morning; he, like you, often put his own needs aside in favour of getting more work done in a quicker amount of time. You walked at Arthur’s pace, slowly, carefully, and periodically did you look at him, you really looked, just to make sure that he was okay. He was so exhausted, so weary, so done…

He looked the same way you felt, and it made you love him more just as much as it shattered your heart.

Arriving home couldn't happen soon enough.

Arthur reached the door before you, his steps shuffling and his head tilted to one side, as if he couldn't hold himself up anymore and just wanted to collapse onto the nearest flat surface, as he fished around in one of his pockets for the key to the apartment. His dimples were pronounced deep within the soft skin of his cheeks, chewing was he on the inside of his mouth. He let himself in and invited you inside after him with a sweeping gesture of one of his arms, a weary smile on his face. As you crossed the threshold did Arthur look left and right down the grimy corridor before he shut the door and drew the safety chain across the bolt, the familiar sound welcoming the both of you home.

Or, rather, the sound welcomed you into the apartment. You had been home ever since Arthur had met you in the street with a simple word which meant so much.

Silence reigned supreme as the two of you shed your outer layers and left behind your daily duties, responsibilities, and anything else which commanded your time away from each other. Dinner was made and consumed in relative silence, with the two of you only talking to each other casually. Today had been too much and you both just wanted to rest. That was all you wanted, needed, but only with the other person. The same routine carried out with anyone else would simply feel wrong.

Indeed, every day passed like this; you would wake up tired even if you got yourself a full eight hours of sleep, you would go to work or spend the day catching up on all of the chores and menial tasks which you weren't able to do when you were at work, for so tired would you be when you came home that all you had the energy to do was plop down beside Arthur on the worn sofa for those few precious hours until you had to go to bed and do it all over again. You would meet up with Arthur half way between your bus stop and the pharmacy he frequented, you would trudge home together hand in hand, step by step by step, and the evenings, oh... oh, the evenings were for the both of you.

Finally was there nothing left to do but to heal the rift between your bodies and minds; neglecting yourselves physically to uphold the demands which society placed on you would always catch up to you mentally, and you needed time to put yourselves back together before you had to wake up to begin anew. As the two of you got into bed, the sun having long since set and there only being a handful of hours until the two of you had to be up for work in the morning, your arms immediately found Arthur and you practically dragged yourself across the mattress to him. Those few hours were so terribly precious and daily coveted by the two of you, and this night did you feel your heart bleeding even more than it already was as Arthur gifted you with the day's last smile from him. He hadn’t even watched Murray tonight, so emotionally and physically tired was he, and yet he found it within him to smile.

For you.

Fuck, you loved him.

You smiled back, that string between your bodies pooled in the middle of the bed, and tipped your head so that you could press a kiss to Arthur's forehead. You could barely see in the room, so dark was it and so dim were the streetlight's outside, but you felt around as best as you could, trailing your lips across his weathered face, down, down, to his lips, making Arthur shiver with how your breath ghosted so gently against his face. You kissed him once, twice, thrice, four times and you felt Arthur relax into your tender loving touches as he hummed. There was a smile on his face, you could feel it.

It was echoed on your own lips, too.

Your hands came up to cup his face and Arthur nuzzled into your palms, his lips pursing to press kisses against your soft skin. He shuffled closer to you, an arm wrapping firmly around your waist as his face ducked into the warm crook of your neck.

You fell asleep like that, wrapped up in each other, and you remained such until the morning, when all would begin again. It wasn't easy, but it was worth it, if only so you could have this every night; Arthur, in your arms, safe and so loved that he didn't know what to do with himself.

It was what he deserved, but it was also what you deserved, too.

[provokedgoalie]

At Your Mercy.

arthur fleck (joker) x reader

tags: 18+ only/minors move along, allusion to oral (reader giving), tiny mention of murder & a weapon

Maybe it was the way he looked after a killing spree: blood splattered face; mused up green locks; long, slender fingers still gripping the loaded gun.

Witnessing him transform into this symbol of insurgency stirred something in you; perhaps a part of you—the majority of it—gets off at seeing him in control.

That's how you ended up on your knees in between his spread legs.

When he crossed the threshold of your shared apartment door, you all but shoved him to the couch, forcing him to be at your mercy.

He followed your desperate hands fumbling for his belt buckle, scanning your face set in concentration. “What's got you so worked up, doll?” he inquired with a low chuckle.

“Couldn't get that image of you going after that rich bastard. Made me go crazy at the thought of you digging your gun into his head,” you rasped. “Did he plea for his life, baby?”

“Like a sinner praying to his god,” he grinned, the pearly whites a stark contrast to his scarlet painted mouth. He ran a composed hand through your hair, before gripping a handful into a makeshift ponytail.

His patience was wearing thin as you slid the zipper of his slacks in an unhurried manner, “Better get that sweet lips around me before I have you beggin', toots.” he chided, forcing your head forward with a harsh jerk.

“Yes, Mr. J.” you purred, blunt nails raking down his scrawny thighs—marveling at his taunt muscles trembling beneath your teasing touch.

[adrenochromec9h9no3]

Me, fighting with my inner demons.

[yesttoheaven]

I SEE YOU – chapter IV

pairing – arthur fleck x female!reader

wc – 2.3k

warnings – idk... misty being a b*tch with arthur?

a/n – hi everyone! I hope you are well because I'm brazilian and I cannot say the same lol the president is a piece of shit and he can't rule the country in the middle of a pandemic (not even without the pandemic, in fact)

anyway enjoy the chapter!

English is not my first language. I am getting help from google translator and he is not always a good ally, so I apologize for any typos or grammar errors.

Y/N – your name

chapter one. chapter two.

chapter three. chapter four.

"What are you doing here, Misty?" The surprise was notable in Y/N's words.

Many people could walk through that door, but Misty was definitely not one of them.

"I should ask you the same question..." The woman came over and put her hands on the actress' shoulders, smiling amiably. "But we don't have time for that right now. You have a dinner to go! And it is not right to keep a man like Charles waiting."

"Charles?" Arthur asked, trying to find a way to join the conversation. "Is he also an actor?"

After these simple words, the redhead burst out laughing and Arthur didn't understand what he had done wrong this time. He was just curious and a little interested to know who was the man who had a date with Y/N that night.

"Actor? God, have you never heard of Charles Lewis Tiffany?" Misty questioned how if the fact that Arthur didn’t know the man was an offense to humanity and Arthur just shook his head, too embarrassed to say anything else.

Who the hell was this man? The Pope? And why did Y/N have a dinner with Pope?

"It's okay, Arthur." Always so graceful, the actress reassured him and left Misty's side to be close to him. "Charles owns Tiffany & Co., the one that appears in the movie Breakfast at Tiffany's... Have you watched this movie before?"

"Oh, oftentimes!"

"Me either! And now Charles wants me to be the face of his new collection! I'm so excited, he came to Gotham just to follow it up in person!" The happiness shining in her eyes was contagious, but Misty didn’t like seeing Y/N squeeze the man’s arm gently.

"I hate to have to do this... the conversation is so pleasant, but we have to go, mon cher." With a smile, Y/N's manager adjusted the bag on her shoulder. She wanted to take the actress away from this freak as soon as possible.

"You cannot go without the VHS tape." Arthur objected, receiving a death glare from Misty, but the only thing that mattered to him was Y/N. "I'll get this for you." After these words, the man left the living room with a reason to make her stay a little longer in his apartment.

"Well, I think we're going to have to wait." Y/N shrugged, but inside she was beaming.

Feeling her mouth dry, she picked up the glass of water on the table, but that was her worst mistake.

"What are you doing? Don't drink this! That dirty glass is full of germs!" The glass was snatched from her hand and Y/N looked at Misty in disbelief.

"That glass is not dirty, Misty."

"How can you be sure of that? I heard that the Narrows sewer is one of the worst in Gotham!"

"Thanks for the lesson, but that didn’t come from the Narrows sewer. This water is from the kitchen tap."

"Oh my God..." The actress could have sworn that the woman's face turned green and she would vomit at any moment. "Why did you drink this? You'll be sick!"

Before Y/N had a chance to respond to these insanities, someone called her. She ran over to the bag and took out her cell phone. It was Charles.

"Hey, Charles! It's good to talk to you." On the other side, all she received were strange noises. The man's voice was being cut off and it was difficult to understand. "The connection is awful..."

"Why am I not surprised? Narrows is the end of the world!" Misty commented, rolling her eyes.

Without time for this discussion, Y/N said:

"Maybe in the corridor I will get a better signal."

"Be careful, you don't know what kind of neighbors there are in this place." She warned, listening to the door open and close, but Y/N said nothing.

Alone in the living room, Misty had the same disgusted look as when she arrived. For her this apartment is small even for an ant and this wallpaper is ridiculous, but in the midst of so much poverty, something on the couch attracted her attention.

"What do we have right here? I don't believe he has a diary..." The woman whispers to herself, laughing, after picking up Arthur's journal. She knew it was wrong, but she was bored.

The first few pages were OK, he had a shitty life like any other unfortunate person, but what came next scared the hell out of her. Misty knew there was something wrong with this man. The instant she saw him, she knew, but that... those words... were from a sick person. Arthur was a disgusting pervert. The redhead needed a moment to breathe and then she saw the magazines on the table and an scissors...

Oh no. He intends to include Y/N in this depravity show!

"I finally found." With bright eyes, Arthur looked for Y/N in the living room, but all he found was Misty... and his journal. "W-What... What are you d-doing?"

"Stay away from me!" She exclaimed, backing away for fear that he would do something against her. "I swear, if you get close I'll scream so loud and when Y/N comes through that door, I will tell her your little secret. She will be so disappointed, but she will finally find out who you really are... A perv!"

"N-No, please... You got it wrong." He tried, his voice taking on a desperate tone. Arthur didn't want to lose the actress's friendship. She was too important for him. "I c-can explain."

"Oh, can you explain? You will glue Y/N's head to a cat's body and then you will sit on that old sofa and touch yourself? You should be in Arkham! You're a sick person! I can't believe Y/N was alone with you..."

Arthur felt his stomach churning.

"You're wrong... I have a lot of respect for her. Y/N is special to me and I would never do something like that."

"I don't want to hear your excuses!" The woman threw the journal at him and Arthur cringed like a frightened dog. After hitting him on the back, the journal fell to the floor and when he saw those collages, he felt ashamed of himself. "Listen to me... I will say this only once: Stay away from her. It doesn’t matter what kind of fantasies you’ve created in your sick head, Y/N will not be a part of that. If I know that after today you keep talking to her, I'll call the police and when they find out you're a fucking perv, you will spend the rest of your days in Arkham." She warned with all the letters and threats, now it was up to him to choose to cooperate or not. This man is too old to play being a teenager. These images of naked women, these cats and those sad quotes in his journal prove just one thing. Maybe he's a sexual predator, but Misty wouldn't be here to find that out either. "Enjoy your pornography and leave Y/N alone. I hope I never see you again."

Arthur saw his world fall apart as soon as the redhead left his apartment with the worst assumptions about him. He was not a perverted monster. He would never touch Y/N without her consent and would never endanger her life. Never ever. Y/N was the only good thing about Gotham; she was a light at the end of the tunnel. So angelic and peaceful. Whenever she smiles, butterflies appear in his stomach and Arthur knows what these famous butterflies mean, but he doesn't know what those collages mean... If Y/N knew, she would probably be afraid of him.

In the corridor, the actress was trapped in a bubble, talking animatedly with Charles. The call had no specific reason, the man just wanted to make sure everything was fine for dinner that night.

"Okay... This is one of Gotham's best restaurants. Trust me, you will love the place!" She assured him, intending to make a good impression. It wasn't every day that she got a chance to dine with the genius behind Tiffany & Co. and represent that brand. This was an important step in her career. "Now I need to go, Charles. See you soon, bye!" Y/N hummed the ending, watching Misty approach where she was. "Why are you here?"

"It's just your friend's mom. She's not feeling very well..."

"Isn't Penny okay?" Concern crossed Y/N's face and she tried to get back to apartment 8J, but Misty took her arm, lying again:

"Y/N, don't be indiscreet. This is a family problem and Arthur is taking care of it." With those words, she guided the actress to the elevator, but Y/N kept looking at the door to Arthur's apartment. "You need to prepare for dinner... I chose a beautiful dress for you."

...

THREE DAYS LATER

"Put red on her lips... Don't forget the mascara... and on the cheeks use this blush... Not this one! The peach blush!"

It was possible to say that Charles Lewis Tiffany was taking the place of the makeup artist. The woman was losing patience, Y/N realized this, but he wanted to participate in every second of it. When she finished, Charles smiled, admiring Y/N's beauty through the mirror.

"You see? You're genuinely beautiful... I think I finally found my muse." The actress was flattered by the compliments and that reflected in her smile when Charles took a blue box, but this was not a simple blue box. This is the famous Tiffany Blue Box. "I want you to meet my new creation..." He opened the box, stealing Y/N's breath instantly. "Dramatically plunging down the decolletage, an incredible emerald-cut bicolor zoisite that shifts from violet-blue to purplish-red, depending on the angle. The pendant is over 48 carats and it's wrapped in a halo of baguette diamonds and suspended from a diamond rondelle chain of over 37 total carats."

"Oh Charles, this is absolutely beautiful. I'm speechless..." She confessed, watching him take the necklace and offer to put it around her neck. Y/N accepted immediately and when the pendant touched the white fabric of the dress, she smiled at the mirror.

"Diamonds are a girl's best friend" Charles whispered, eliciting a giggle from her. "Now I need to speak to the photographer, but take a few minutes to prepare yourself." The man smiled one last time and Y/N walked to the door, opening it for him. She took the opportunity to spy on what was happening on the other side and it was possible to say that there was a little sadness in her eyes.

"What are you looking for?" Misty's voice echoed and she closed the door quickly.

"Huh... nothing!"

The woman was checking the contract – something about image authorization – and when she took her eyes off the papers, she found Y/N with a half-hearted smile.

"Go ahead... Spill the tea."

Brian was probably smoking, so Misty was her only option.

"Arthur was busy these days, but he called me this morning... He looked nervous and said he would like to talk to me, so I invited him to accompany the photoshoot, but..."

"You did what?!" Misty left the chair, interrupting her. Not wanting to start a scene, the redhead looked at Dariela, the makeup artist, and said: "Get out." The woman immediately stopped organizing her makeup and ran out of the dressing room.

"Was that necessary?" Y/N asked, crossing her arms.

"And was it necessary to invite that maniac to come here too?"

"Jesus, Misty!" She walked to the other side of the dressing room. "Manic? Really?"

"I'm just telling the truth."

"Based on what? His bank account?"

"Based on his journal." Misty replied and the actress looked in her direction with a frown. Shaking her head, the redhead let out a bitter laugh before confessing: "He doesn't use it just to write jokes... I found a lot of pornography on those pages."

Y/N felt a little uncomfortable with that. Certain things do not need to be exposed... She didn't need to know about that part of Arthur's life and Misty just invaded his privacy.

"Well... many men consume pornography daily."

"Y/N, pornography is not the point here. He makes some weird collages... women with cat heads... skulls... one of these women was tied up in a compromising position... Can you see how problematic this is?" Misty was trying to open her eyes and consequently was scaring the actress, but that was not all. "I saw the magazines. That man will probably do the same to you... your face on the body of these naked women or on a cat's body! You have always been uncomfortable with the way men see you only as a sex symbol... and now Arthur is using you as a sex toy!"

"Stop! Just stop, okay?" Y/N demanded, using an edgy tone of voice. That was too much for her to assimilate. "You're saying this because you do not accept the idea of ​​Arthur being my friend! All that matters to you is status, but it doesn't matter to me! When are you going to let me live my own life?"

"This is not about social classes, this man is a pervert! I'm trying to protect you!"

"Enough, Misty!" That was enough to make the redhead shut up and Y/N found her way back to the mirror.

To complete the look, inside the blue box was a beautiful diamond ring and a pair of shiny round diamond earrings, just waiting for her. Putting on the ring was an easy task, but she couldn’t say the same about earrings; her hands were shaking and this is all the fault of the stress.

"Let me help you." The manager approached and at first Y/N refused her help, but after another failed attempt, she handed the earrings to the woman. "I know I can be a bitch sometimes..."

"Sometimes?"

Misty just sighed, shaking her head.

~~~~~~~▪~~~~~~~~~▪~~~~~~~~~▪~~~~~~~~~~

a/n – likes and reblogs are appreciated but honestly I’d love to know what you all think of this one. really hope you enjoy it and thank you soooo much for reading ♡

[shiedagabe]

A Stormy Day

GIF Belongs to: Omgreedus, Wattpad.com

Word count: 1000

Genre: Fluff, Contemporary

A storm is a disturbance that might scare the hearts of many, but not yours. You have always enjoyed looking out the window during stormy days, hearing the rain tapping on the window while hearing the distant thunder roar with unimaginable might, a union of the utopian sky and the malformed earth. You saw many people and many couples as well, seeking refuge anywhere they could – inside restaurants, coffee shops and phone booths. Some of them even accepted the normalcy of said storm and embraced the rain. Just like a ruined day or a depressing mood all of these things do come and go. Although you did find funny that your boyfriend was simultaneously scared and was caring for you. 

Every time a lightning struck he would slightly jump up, which made you giggle for a moment, and, in turn, make him happy as well. Despite this inconvenience, he was preparing some candles and some books he could read while you laid next to him in case the power did go out. Despite not looking like so, he appeared to be a savant and intelligent. You didn’t know where his ideals about morality came from, since he grew up in a dysfunctional household, but you knew for certain that they were more than just. He liked to help others in need even though he wasn’t doing so great himself, either physically and mentally. That mattered not, however, you were there to take care of him and you genuinely didn’t mind doing so. A soft smile and a misty-eyed look were more than enough of a reward for you. 

 You decided to go near him and help him out with some stuff like preparing some food that you could heat up in the fireplace later or just help set up the candles that were scattered around the rooms. The day was growing even dimmer, you couldn’t tell where the sun was and all of the electronics around the house were turned off in case a lightning struck. You were also bored out of your mind because you had nothing else to do, everything was prepared and you couldn’t do anything with Artie like watch TV or go outside for a walk. That’s when he told you to sit on the couch; apparently he had prepared something for you in occasions just as this one. You could feel yourself fumbling around with your own emotions; you didn’t know what to feel. You felt anxious because you didn’t have a lot of money and if he went out of his way to buy something for you then surely it must be expensive. You also felt happy; even though he usually doesn’t do these kinds of things (mostly because you want save your money up) it’s always nice to receive a gift from time to time. We he came back he was giggling to himself – he thought he found the gift that perfectly described you, although he refused to tell you what he had bought you and told you to hurry up, he wanted to see your face sparkle up like a light-ridded night sky. You tried to open it carefully, despite what Artie told you, because you wanted to keep the paper wrapping the present came in, all of these tiny things always meant a lot to you and you didn’t want to lose this one either. He gave you a Walkman and you couldn’t be more than happy. You were enthusiastic, in fact, because he knew you loved hearing music all of the time – it reminded you of moments passed and you always enjoyed reinforcing your emotions by listening to a song on the radio. He nervously told you that maybe if you could hear music everywhere you went you’d think about him more often. That, of course, was a silly statement, you already thought about him, anyway, but the gift in itself was amazing. You gave him a huge hug and told him that was everything you ever wanted which was, in fact, true. Walkman’s were pretty recent news at the time and having one made you feel extremely special, but now you kind of felt some remorse because you didn’t have something to give him back. You were going to excuse yourself after things had settled down so you could go buy something outside, but thunder struck and the light was now out. Luckily, your Walkman ran on batteries, so you could listen to it regardless of the weather, so you turned your little friend on and sat with your head on his shoulder until, eventually, both of you dozed off.

Those times were different times, and although you felt the same at the time you can’t tell if it’s true anymore. You still consider yourselves friends, that is, in all actuality, correct, but I guess feelings do fade over time, like youth and young love. However, you have kept your Walkman near and dear to your heart. It was the first time that someone outside of your family had loved you unconditionally and although you remember those times with not only some distress, you feel comfortable knowing that things deescalated naturally. The Walkman does still work, curiously, so you decided to go buy some cassette tapes near your pawn shop. They were expensive as all living hell, especially because they have to keep them in mint condition, even though people rarely listen to them anymore. You decided to come home and try the cassette tape out, and, wouldn’t you know it, it started raining. You started getting teary-eyed, like he once was, but you moved on inside despite what you were feeling. You laid on the couch and you heard the satisfying click of the Walkman. The music started playing with a little bit of static – the device was fifty years old at this point, it was honestly a surprise that it was still playing. Amazingly, the song that you had bought was the same one that you played when you first got the device – a rush of emotions filled you and you felt more than incredibly comfortable on your couch, like he was still there. Surrounded by such a positive aura, you decided you could finally get some rest knowing that love, no matter what kind, is eternal.