#jess' full spn rewatch

[girlwithonegoal]

rewatching spn and i forgot how amazing the pilot is. setting up john as the father god-like figure who can never be found no matter how badly you want to see him...the jess/mary/woman in white parallels...the past comes back to haunt you and you will always look in the face of the very thing you are running away from...the reunion between dean and sam being as full of anger and grief as it is full of love..."you can't kill me i'm not unfaithful" "you will be" (they were insane for this btw)...dean using his 0.2 seconds of time before being arrested to warn sam...the last shot with the trunk closing. it's been said but spn pilot is truly theeee episode of all time.

[scftblush]

along with my spn rewatch i’ve also been rewatching grey’s anatomy (i’m stopping as soon as i get to the end of s14 obviously) and also full house (i’m having a hard time don’t ask) and i think that mark sloan and alex karev along with uncle jesse are dean winchester variants and i will not be elaborating

[claudiabian]

5x04 / 13x01 / 15x19

[fallenandthefaithless]

The Winchesters 1x01 - Pilot

So now that a few days have passed and I’ve had some time to think about the episode here are my notes on The Winchesters premiere episode.

PLOT

The plot brings back the s1 framing of searching for a missing father, in this case two missing fathers - Henry and Samuel. Mary and John are both searching for their dads though in different. John is looking for answers while Mary is looking for her dad out of worry. These motives kind of mirror Sam and Dean in S1 - Sam searching for John because he wants answers about Jess’s death and Dean wants to look for John out of concern.

The plot also brings in Ada and I was really happy that she was brought in right away. I guess she’s going to kind of be like Bobby and I’m always surprised when I rewatch SPN at how long it really takes for Bobby to become a regular face so I’m really glad that they brought Ada in at the very beginning. I was a little disappointed that we didn’t get much of Ada but I’m really interested to see where they take her character. So far we’ve had her help both Samuel and Henry with research - Samuel and his research on the demon box and Henry and his research on wraiths. I wonder if there’s something there about the wraiths... I might have to think on that more.

The Vietnam flashbacks have already been related back to Purgatory here and so has the symbolism of the silver in John’s arm - a parallel to both Benny (being in John/Dean’s arm) and the hallucinations of Murphy/Cas. I also think it’s really interesting that it was a religious cross and that John used it as a weapon. Of course there’s the immediate link to Cas because of the cross but the weapon aspect reminded me of how Heaven isn’t soft and kind but the angels are weapons and are “heartless”. 

CHARACTERS

Onto our new scooby gang! Heads up, there’s a strong focus on John in these notes though I briefly touch on all four of our main characters. 

I really like that there’s clearly drama going on between the hunter trio. It really highlights that John has wandered into an established dynamic no matter the arguments they might currently be having. We aren’t told just yet how Mary met Carlos but I do like that it’s been left unsaid just yet. We are told that Lata met Mary through Samuel but we still haven’t been told the full story. We’ve also been told that Carlos has lost his family but I wonder where Lata’s family is. She says when John meets her that her friends call her Lata, or they would if she had friends. Why is she so alone? She seems to have known Maggie which makes me think there’s more to that story than we’ve heard.

Also, speaking of Maggie, she and Mary seemed to have been very close - like sisters. I wonder if Maggie’s father was the unknown uncle who organised Mary’s headstone.

John is being shown to be really friendly and seems to connect with people which is ironic considering in s1 of SPN he had had a falling out with pretty much everyone. And yes, John is being very friendly but I couldn’t help but notice that it seems a bit surface level. In keeping with the parallels with John/Sam and Mary/Dean, John comes across as the “normal” one who can easily bond with people while Mary is the mean one. And yet it’s to Mary that Carlos and Lata have the deeper connection. Yes, they’ve known her for longer but I can’t help but keep coming back to this. I wrote on an earlier post here that John fought alone at the end of the episode whereas Mary, Lata and Carlos worked as a team. Despite Mary wanting to push the others away she still works so well with them.

On this topic, something that stood out in my mind are the coffee scenes. In the first John brings Mary a coffee and jokes with her and she finally tells him her name. This is early on and before John meets the others and it’s framed as him connecting with Mary. Very sweet (unlike her coffee). But in comparison Mary brings the whole team coffee at the end of the episode. She has a moment with John but then also has a moment of connection with both Lata and Carlos. I just find it interesting that John’s moment is so isolated whereas Mary’s is more about bringing the team together as a unit. And yes, I know John has moments with both Carlos and Lata but I couldn’t let that thought go.

Speaking of his moments with Carlos and Lata, he has two with each of them. With Lata the first is when they first met and it’s a little flirty and it’s fun and sweet. With Carlos it’s when he gets John to exorcise the demon and jokes about getting him some new clothes. Both of these are fun and I think offer John a very lighthearted view of these people and their place in the world. Yes it’s dark but look at their bond and he’s so excited by his successful kill at the end of the episode!His second moment with both of are sadder and hint at the reality of their world. Lata is terrified before the hunt and Carlos says he lost his family and he hints at the horror about the hunters life by mentioning how awful the end will be for them.

There’s something I also wanted to note about Mary and her relationships, particularly with Carlos and Latika. Over the course of the episode we see Mary push both of them away, she won’t talk to them, she didn’t want to call Carlos etc. The last fight scene is really important with them. To start with they’re all separated - Mary is with John, Carlos left to go to the van without telling Lata and Lata doesn’t know what to do - but they all come back together and work to save Ada’s life. She reaches out to them both verbally during the coffee scene as I mentioned above which brings them back. I feel as though Mary realising that she cannot do this alone is going to be important to her story.

I cannot wait to see what happens in 1x02 and how these characters dynamics develop. I really want to see how Millie fits into the story. I want to see just how much she really knows. I can’t wait to see more of Ada’s character. And I really hope we see Deanna at some point.

[you-cant-spell-subtext-without]

Is jess mason anti SPN or pro w**cest or someting? Is that why I am seeing so much hate about her???

hi! I dont have specific receipts or tbh a full set of spoons to get into every detail, but generally there's been a pretty negative history in fandom about her. my PRIMARY concern when speaking with other fans has been past treatment of fans directly; some choice statements regarding certain opinions and theories (network ones in particular) post-show ending; and a book that's been published about the show that has some pretty large inaccuracies (like wrong names or wrong information re: a character appearing in future episodes, etc).

again, I'm not letting her involvement deter my excitement about this podcast because I want to support Rob and Rich and I personally love the show and WANT content (I am also still puzzled on how one 'scripts' a rewatch podcast...). but I am wary, and hope that some of this is eventually addressed and dealt with on the other side of things (especially as it has somewhat tarnished a project that many of us were very 100% on board and excited for).

[theangiediary]

1x02 rewatch let's goooo

- Jess's grave (in Sam's dream) has a crucifix and virgin Mary candle, indicating she or her family were catholic.

- "I should have told you the truth" Sammy...

- Dean has never offered to have Sam drive? Lmao. HC that Sam literally does not possess a valid license.

- "Dad will have answers he'll know what to do" vs Sam immediately questioning the coordinates.

- Dean looks so itty bitty next to Sam in the ranger station.

- he looks so amused/proud of Sam taking on the "shoot first ask questions later" attitude 😭

- people focus on Dean calling Hailey "sweetheart" as evidence that he/spn is sexist but like? the whole first introduction he's relating to her as a protective older sibling.

- "it's probably something corporeal" "corporeal? excuse me, professor" "shut up" brother dialogue my beloved <3

- "if it's corporeal we can kill it" the predecessor to "if it bleeds you can kill it".

- lmaoooo biker boots, jean, Impala on the dirt road I am obsessed with how the show does point out how ridiculous this is. Ik some people are like "they shouldn't have gotten away with being fbi agents looking like that" but like they really didn't! A lot of side characters were sceptical in s1.

- "what kind of furry critters do you hunt?" + Turning Roy's response of buck/bear to bambi/yogi... Dean has such an interesting way of speaking. It's somewhat infantalising and just full of media references.

- "probably the most honest I've been with a woman.. ever" we learn later that this isn't true, so like. When I say you can't take Dean at his word...

- again, the provisions comment. It's not misogyny, it's charming. There is a difference.

- Dean can track? but doesn't even bring water? I'm so confused by their training.

- Sam's bde ♥️🥰❤️

- Dean just watching Sam go at Roy right until he was going to reveal the supernatural. He is one of us (mean!sam girlie). Also very funny that the next scene is dean putting down symbols for protection.

- "You want to tell me what's going on in that freaky head of yours?" Dean just really likes calling Sam a freak, huh? Lol. Also, the idea that Dean never talks about feelings... like he's trying. He doesn't talk about his, sure maybe, but if Sammy is distressed he does need to fix it.

- someone said recently that Sam has always been comfortable with "we can't save everyone" philosophy, and that is so true! Even here, he's willing to get Haley and others to safety, but that's it. He doesn't care about being nice about it, nor about saving Tommy.

- "Saving people hunting things" obviously iconic. But also, it's an interesting example of Dean extrapolating John's wishes on very little info, and Sam demanding answers/specifics ("why doesn't he just tell us what he wants?").

- Dean talking about "you can't be angry you have to be patient, help others because we ourselves are doomed, have fun with the killing" 🥴🫠

- rosary in the journal...

- observation: Sam takes the more emotional victims (traumatised survivor) and Dean takes the "tough" ones (breaking news about supernatural to family member, authority figures)

- okay, valid criticism of spn? absolute bastardisation of religions/cultures. A lot of supernatural or fantasy media does this, and I'm not sociologically adept enough to talk about it, but like. Acknowledging.

- the little brothers saving their big siblings 🥺

- we talk a lot of their faces during the flare gun moment, but I highly recommend relistening to it... Sam's smug "those will work" is 😳

- "you thinking what I'm thing?" "I think so" the way they know each other.... for hunting. as people? It takes a couple seasons. But aliases, strategy, etc they are in sync.

- "you want some white meat bitch?!" god I miss the naughties, you just can't say that shit anymore

- all three of them huddled behind Sam. He big.

- Sam standing behind the quiet youngest delivering the "grizzly" story to the cops after.. helping him lie...

- brainworms at "must you cheapen the moment?" bc yeah Dean's cocky and a flirt etc but the way he does it in a look, the way he's sitting during rather than crowding her, the little shocked face he makes when she does kiss his cheek 🥹 these are important details!! This is the difference between charm and grossness!

- much talk about the "I'm driving" look (as it should be) but are you aware it lasts a full 5 seconds........

[watchingspnagain]

Rewatching Wendigo

Welcome to “Dean Doesn’t Wear Shorts Except When He Wears Shorts: A Supernatural Rewatch Blog” with Lor and Mace!

Up today, s1e2: Wendigo.

Something is in the woods. Sam wants to Find Dad and Get Revenge. Dean wants to Help People. The boys meet a set of siblings who have to take care of one another because their parents are dead (oh, look: an parallel to the Winchesters). They hike out into the backwoods to help two of the siblings rescue the third with everything you could possibly want for such an endeavor: peanut M&Ms and a cocky white dude who will get in the way. Once Sam figures out they’re hunting a wendigo, it’s a simple matter of getting separated, hurt, and terrorized (with a side of flare guns) to take care of the pesky monster. Also: everyone in this episode is fine.

Below is a log of our real-time reactions as we watched. Remember that there may be spoilers for any part of SPN’s 15-season run here. Note also that the nature of our conversation is adult and thus it may contain adult language and themes.

Lor:

I had two random thoughts about the first ep (while Netflix is deciding to work). 1) ironically (sort of?), since the show starts out at Sam's story and from his pov, so to speak, he doesn't have An Entrance. I was thinking about who in SPN gets one. Cas, of course, has an amazing one. So does Death. Dean gets the reveal that he's not a burglar and the "Easy Tiger." Sam sticks his head around a door. and 2) I've never really loved the way Dean reacts to Jess when he meets her (and I still don't), but I was thinking, even then, even when it's kind of smack head upside-y, when he says "Hey, I like the Smurfs," he's trying to be what (he thinks) the other person wants. It's not "I'm so cool," it's "I can be what you like"

Mace:

Hm. I agree with all of that but the smurfs thing. He's being a turd there, and honestly it's just wobbly pilot writing, I'm certain. Dean wasn't solidly Dean yet; even late-season-1 Dean wouldn't say that like that anymore, I think.

Lor:

Oh, full agree he's a turd. and if it's bad writing, I find it interesting that it's bad in a way that will eventually morph into something recognizable as him.

Mace:

yeah

[and we begin:]

Lor:

NEVER go camping

never

Mace:

agreed

Lor:

if you DO go camping, never leave the tent after dark. you HOLD IT

Mace:

DUDE go farther away from the tent! EW

Lor:

LOLOLOLOL

snork the dude is reading Joseph Campbell

Mace:

HAHAHA ick

omg they hear a scream and the one lazy dudebro just lowkey calls out "Brad." HELPFUL.

Lor:

lol

Mace:

oh right, this is pre-full-suit days. adorable that they wear chinos and blazers for a season

BABIES

Lor:

YES

and so ACCURATE for college boy Sammy

Mace:

YEP

Lor:

Omg i JUMPED. i forgot about the hand and it was a dream

Mace:

snork!

Lor:

He's FINE

Mace:

HE. IS. FINE.

sings WIIIIINCHESTER FIIIIINE

Lor:

lolololol

they are both fine. everyone in that car is perfectly adjusted and fine

Mace:

YEP

Lor:

omg Dean

focus, honey

Mace:

"BULL"

I like this guy already

Lor:

lolol

the adorable youngness is KILLING ME 

Mace:

YEP

how many times do they flipflop which one is rash and which wants to be prepared?

Lor:

HA

Mace:

"nice car" aaaand Dean is gone

Lor:

YEP

Mace:

aw, Sammy's got this thinking face on

adorable

Lor:

YES

aw, Sam's little folder

Mace:

YES

they're already establishing their different questioning tactics here - Sammy is the gentle understanding one, Dean is the charming goof

Lor:

YES

Mace:

(although he's not to goofy here, of course)

but he's clearly more to the point than Sammy

Lor:

and the way they switch off to let the tactic that will work better take the fore

Mace:

YES

Lor:

"Excuse me, professor"

Mace:

"excuse me professor"

Lor:

LOL

Mace:

Dean deflecting

Lor:

but then he uses the word too pets him

oh lord early Snark Brothers

Mace:

HA

HC: that's John's fault - he would tease either one of them for using 'fancy words' until Dean stopped and Sammy used his vocabulary as a way to rebel

Lor:

ooo, yes, nice

Mace:

"I don't do shorts" YES YOU DO, DEAN WINCHESTER

Lor:

"sweatheart, I don't do shorts"

YAAAAS

Mace:

(but don't call her sweetheart, Dean, gah)

Lor:

(yeeeeeah)

Mace:

(more early wobbly writing for him)

Lor:

(yeah. that or they wanted him to be that way at first and then changed their minds? or realized Jensen could do a lot more with it than that)

that was an... interesting reaction to getting hauled around by him, Dean

Mace:

it seems that the writing for Sam is more steady early on, maybe? And does that mean Jensen had more of a hand in shaping Dean? Did he resist certain attitudes in the character writing early?

Lor:

ooo, maybe

and THAT is a lie, Dean

omg the M&Ms

Mace:

hm. more wobbly stuff, I think

it's hard to analyze Dean in particular this early, it seems

Lor:

yeah, maybe. it won't be long before we find out he was once VERY honest with a woman. I mean, I have no idea what kind of timeline shows like this get written on, so

Mace:

we need to let go and let Jack for now, I think, instead of trying to align this Early Dean to what he becomes

Lor:

yeah. interesting

Mace:

omg Sam shushing the woman and then Dean shouting for Sam HAHAHA

Lor:

LOL

it's always interesting to me in this episode that they DONT prepare better for hiking out into the woods. like, the fact they know they're looking for something supernatural doesn't make this not the deep woods? the contrast is really interesting, even just visually

Mace:

hm, good point

Smarty Sammy (tm) figures it out

Lor:

YES

Mace:

he gets a cookie

Lor:

yes. or some m&ms in the meantime

SAMMEH

"nobody likes a skeptic, Roy"

Mace:

"nobody likes a skeptic, Roy" Yeah, Roy - you SHUSH

HAHAHA

Lor:

"No, you're not fine"

Oh, big brother Dean

Mace:

Ope, Big Brother Dean

OMG

Lor:

MACE

Mace:

LOR

Lor:

lolololol

Hunting People, Saving Things!

Mace:

'SAVING PEOPLE HUNTING THINGS"

WOOT

Lor:

snork

that bit with Dean and the catch phrase I bet is the single most repeated scene in the Then sections

Mace:

Ha! You could be right

oh, keeping anger pent up is unhealthy, DEAN WINCHESTER?!

Lor:

oh, Dean, you Hufflepuffle, you

Mace:

ugh, this mimicry business is CREEPY

YEP

Lor:

SHUT UP, ROY

Mace:

yeah shut it, ROY

Lor:

dude, what an IDIOT

Mace:

yep

(Omg I only hear Hermione's voice with that phrase)

Lor:

(but of course)

ooo, neat shot of Sam against the giant tree stump

Mace:

yeah

Lor:

TELL US THE STORY, BOYS

Mace:

snork!

Lor:

look, I am pulling up a log and settling in. exposit all you like, Winchesters

Mace:

chin in hands

Lor:

whatcha doin? oh, nothing just wandering through the woods with my molotov cocktail AT THE READY

Mace:

snork!

Okay, I love this show, but we're two for two with blood dripping on someone from above, find a new gross trope, boys

Lor:

HA!

it IS really fucking creepy though. that's one of those images (from the pilot, not here) that came back to me in the night when I first watched the show

Mace:

Jesus, Sam's smile.

Lor:

YES

Mace:

yep

"keep out no admittance" EXCEPT ON PARTY BUSINESS

Lor:

haaaaaaahahahahahaha

oh Dean.

Mace:

Dean's grunts - ooof

okay enough with the jump scares pls

Lor:

lol

omg the BOTH of them with the grins

Mace:

YES

WINK

Lor:

THAT WINK

Mace:

ded

Lor:

"I taste gooood"

Mace:

snork

Lor:

omg I luff him

Mace:

self-objectification dressed up as self-sacrifice Oh Dean Winchester you are a complicated boy

Lor:

he really REALLY is

I love how consistently the people the boys are rescuing become loyal to them so fast

probably some trauma response in there, but it's cool

Mace:

I hadn't thought about it before but this is really late in the episode to just now reveal the monster. pretty cool

Lor:

yeah

Mace:

yep, well, I mean, LOOKIT them. and their CHARM. Give me five minutes with them and I'd follow 'em anywhere

Lor:

CORRECT

omg his stupid grin

Mace:

aw, Sammy supporting the kiddo as he lies to the Fuzz

Lor:

YES

"must you cheapen the moment?" "yeeeah"

god the look when she kisses him gently

Mace:

yeah

Lor:

*wraps him up softly in wool*

"man, I hate camping"

Mace:

"man, I hate camping" SAME, Dean

Lor:

YES

THE TOSS

Mace:

YES

Lor:

mmm, Baby roaring down the road

Mace:

boy, they really don't give any screen time to the absolute break Sam makes with his college/normal life.

Lor:

NOPE

he's just outie

I do wonder, like, is his email just STUFFED with friends going "where ARE you, man?"

Mace:

a little flaming fridge girl is all it takes, apparently, for the Winchester men to get motivated

Lor:

SNORK

Mace:

right?

Mace:

I mean, you wouldn't want a perfectly good fridging to go to waste

Mace:

well sure

(or they were all Jess's friends because, um, OUTSIDER)

Lor:

ooooo, yes

[after the episode ended:]

Mace:

okay, so Winchester Fine is in full swing already in episode 2. Interesting.

Lor:

YES

and we got not just the emotionally "i'm fine" = back off, we ain't talking about this but also the physically I'm fine even though it is PAINFULLY obvious I am very NOT fine

Mace:

Should we define? It seems to me that Winchester Fine = saying you're fine even though very clearly and obviously you are not and everyone knows you're not but you insist that You. Are. Fine. because it's the Manly Hero Thing to Do.

Lor:

YEP

(though interestingly, I don't think either of those instances actually used "fine" in this episode, which is DEFINITELY their word of choice later)

Mace:

Oh, excellent point that it can be used for mental, emotional, or physical (not)fineness, and that there is the "back off we're never talking about this" element

Lor:

but yeah, most of the time the expectation is that the person you are talking to KNOWS you're not fine. which is one of the reasons it's so awesome waaaaaaay down the line when some people (like Cas) just refuse to play the game and are like "uh, you're not though?"

Mace:

YEP

I also blame John for this. You KNOW he did this all the time with those boys. So it has become the Thing One Does because admission of any kind is weakness

Lor:

YES

Mace:

cue Buffy in her cheerleader outfit singing Macho, Macho Maaaaaan

Lor:

LOLOLOLOL

and then there's ramping up of the criteria, like you can only admit you're actually not fine if, like, you've been torturing people in hell for ten years or some shit. heaven forbid you have, like, a normal not fine feeling about, like, normal human things

Mace:

well, and even then you only admit it because your brother won't stop pestering you about it

Lor:

"Look, I found your mom flaming on the ceiling, so don't come crying to me about LITERALLY ANYTHING EVER."

Mace:

and there's nearly as much shame in admitting it as there is in the actual thing you're admitting

Lor:

YES

nothing is ever bad enough to admit not feeling okay about

Mace:

YEP

sigh where's a social-cue-clueless angel to stare you into soul-sharing when you need one?

Lor:

HA!

they have to make it around the board a few times before they can pass hell and collect one helpful angel

so, this episode holds with my early impression that the ghost/spirit ones freak me out a lot more/are more tense than the monster ones

Mace:

oh yes absolutely agreed. ghosts will always be the scariest. This one had some jumpscares that suckerpunch you, but overall it's not that scary

Lor:

yeah

Mace:

snork

Lor:

I wonder sometimes if there's an element of removal (at least for me) about some of the monster ones. scary cannibal monster that hunts people in the deep woods? DONT GO IN THE DEEP WOODS THEN. Problem solved.

Ghosts just show up in paintings you bought innocently bc you thought they were cool. Not fair, really

Mace:

Interesting. Yeah. But I also never plan on going into a haunted house, so…

Lor:

but you MIGHT NOT KNOW

that's how they getcha

Mace:

Oh come ON that painting is CLEARLY HAUNTED or at best ugly and creepy as heckfire

Lor:

lolol

well sure, once its EYES START MOVING

Mace:

oh, my eyes are moving, Lor

(I'm rolling them, in case that wasn't clear)

Lor:

lolololol

I'm glad to see you are volunteering to vet any and all paintings I may at any point buy to make sure they aren't haunted

Mace:

I’m just saying that the painting in the show that ends up being haunted is obviously haunted and the people who buy it are dumbdumbs for not seeing it.

I am not signing up to have a sleepover with your questionable art acquisitions.

Lor:

SNORK

[sammyblep]

FOR THE ASK GAME: sam obviously :’)

First impression ok so it's been AGES since i first watched spn so I'll give you my first impression from my current rewatch which is Oh My God The Universe Hates This Man

Impression now OH MY GOD THE UNIVERSE HATES THIS MAN. SOMEONE GIVE HIM A HUG HE NEEDS A GODDAMN HUG-

Favorite moment Literally any bitchy!Sam moment. Bitchy possessed Sam in Asylum. Bitchy soulless!Sam. Bitchy to Lucifer or a Horseman or God or his brother. I just love it so much

Idea for a story Soooo many actually hang on lemme go look up my list - here we go - I have baby magda au, which I've already talked about some; it focuses on Sam rediscovering his psychic powers and healing from his trauma while also learning how to be a parent for a toddler who's seen horrors no one should know exist. I have nonverbal au, which is Sam slowly going nonverbal post-Cage, culminating with him being fully nonverbal when Gadreel takes over (meaning, since Gadreel is always talking out of Sam anyways, Dean and Cas and co. don't know Sam's been nonverbal for ages until Crowley helps him kick Gadreel out.) Casifer kiss, which jess lc inspired. Honey!Cas developed a reputation for kissing friends and people he liked full on the mouth. Casifer takes advantage of that and kisses Sam a lot. No one knows at first that it's Lucifer doing this and not Cas. I've got the Avatar/bending AU, which I've rambled about in discord a lot, but it's basically Lucifer stole the Avatar powers and used them to manipulate Sam, who then years later uses them to protect Jack. Possessed-again Sam, which is a worse version of Casifer kiss. In this one, Casifer comes up to Sam and asks, "can I?" as if he's going in for a kiss. And Sam goes "yeah, sure" and the next thing he knows Lucifer is possessing him. JESSIFER MY BEST FRIEND JESSIFER - where from the very beginning, all the way back in s1, Lucifer was using Jess's image to reach out to and manipulate Sam, and when he was freed from the Cage, he stole Jess's body and soul from Heaven, promising she could tell Sam she loves him if he can use her as his vessel. Largely inspired by @nevidimochka's art! And lastly (for now at least) there's ghost!Sam, which is that Gadreel comes to possess Sam's body post-trials, but Sam's soul's hold on the body is too tenuous and he just... slips away. But no reaper will come and take him; they don't bother taking any Winchester anywhere anymore, actually, because they just come back anyways. So Sam is forced to haunt Dean and Cas and his own possessed body that he's tied to, unable to leave.

Unpopular opinion This man would not know how to be a good father at first!! He does not have the parenting instinct/experience the way Dean has!! I think he'd learn to be a fantastic parent but it would be an extreme learning curve for him (which is why I love baby Magda au so much because it's that exactly!!)

Favorite relationship God I'm a sucker for so many friendships and relationships... Sam and Jo as besties is a fave, and I'm a sucker for Sabriel and Saileen and my fave ot4 Sabrieleena, and Sam and Cas being genderweird best friends is SUCH a mood... probably if I had to choose only one I'd choose Sam and Magda, mother and daughter

Favorite headcanon oh god i have to pick ONE? O N E???? uh. uhhhhhhh. I'm a transfemme Sammy truther, but that's common... hm. I mean we don't have his canon major at Stanford, just that he was pre-law, but I love the idea of religious history/philosophy double major Sam and that's my personal take on it!

(send me a character and I'll tell you some stuff)

[amispnrewatch]

SPN 1X01

I’ve been wanting to rewatch the series from the beginning post finale for a long time. Then 15x20 happened and for a minute there I thought I’d never want to watch this fucking show again. But, I saw a bunch of other people reclaiming the show by rewatching it and ignoring the finale and I’m down with that.

Note: I bought the full series on iTunes for myself for Christmas 2019 so the CW isn’t getting more streaming money from me and I’ve never tried live-blogging anything so this might be a dumpster fire. We’ll see.

Also, fair warning, I’m not a huge early spn Sam fan. He grew on me eventually, but it took a while.

——————

My eyes always glaze over for the first 6 minutes or show of this episode until Dean shows up. Even when I first watched the show I did this. Also, why does Jess seem immediately more interesting than Sam? Maybe that’s just me.

Has anyone ever mentioned that even when Dean is playing up the douchebag hitting on his brother’s girlfriend bit that he doesn’t actually ogle her? He notices her enough to check out the smurfs on her shirt, but when he’s telling her not to put more clothes on he’s holding eye contact. Nice performance there, Dean.

Lol the dramatic zoom in on Sam after Dean repeats himself about John being missing.

“Of course you should be afraid of the dark. You know what’s out there.” I love it.

“Yeah, well, I don’t want to.” <— and that is my second favorite line from this episode.

“Dad let you go on a hunting trip by yourself?” Fuck off, Sam.

Oh man! A mini tape recorder. I had one in college, which was about the same time this episode aired for the first time. What a throwback. I remember using it to record my class on natural disaster science and I never ended up listening to any of the lectures I recorded.

That little swallow and stare from Dean after Sam says that his interview is for law school is subtle but great. So much hidden emotion there. I love how many people are pointing out how much Jensen really added the nuance to Dean’s character now that the show is over.

I love the woman in white’s dress. It’s a little boobielicious for me, but I love the bottom of it being all torn or lacy or whatever.

She looks a lot like Lisa too. Which doesn’t mean anything, but is interesting.

I’d forgotten about her handprint on this dude’s windshield when he went to look for her! It doesn’t look that bad 15 years later. Well, when I watch it on my phone screen anyway. My real tv might be a different matter.

I’m trying to figure out what kind of car this guy is driving. Ah, I was right, it’s an old VW Cabriolet.

Dean and his junk food.

Sam being high and mighty about money. Bitch, how do you make money while you’re in college? Is it just scholarships and student aid? Does Sam have a job? I mean, he never mentioned it, but he acts like he’s used to slaving away for an hourly wage or something.

I also had a cardboard box filled with old cassette tapes when this episode aired. Half of them I inherited from my dad, some I collected from thrift stores in high school, and a couple of them were mixtapes I made for myself.

My break is over so I’ll have to continue this on my lunch.

[babygirl06301]

1x02: Wendigo Rating: ★★☆☆☆

Look here for my explanations of these reviews.

Written by: Eric Kripke, Ron Milbauer, & Terri Hughes Burton

Directed by: David Nutter

Barring the fact that they pronounced “wendigo” wrong the entire episode, what did I think of the second episode of SPN? It was… all right. It’s a monster-of-the-week episode, as most in the first season are, so it isn’t my personal bread-and-butter, but hey.

What I liked: Most of what I liked in this episode has to do with the characters themselves, so I’m just gonna save my praise for that section below.

What I didn’t like: So, this is kind of a campy horror movie duplicate with an SPN flare. A lot of running around and a lot of exposition. Basically, it was just bland. I’ve never really liked this episode that much because everything in it was mediocre—action, humor, etc.—so I guess it’s essentially the entire episode I didn’t like.

Character work: Except the character work, which I mentioned above. Mostly Sam’s character work, actually. This episode, surprisingly enough, reminded me of Soulless!Sam. I mean, Sam was angry throughout the entire episode, both because he couldn’t process the job of hunting and saving people and because Jess had just died, but the disregard for people’s feelings and the unempathetic comments were very Soulless!Sam. Overall, I think I enjoyed Sam’s part in this episode so much because, at some point in the later seasons, Sam becomes almost too well-adjusted. The anger and bitterness he had in this episode was awesome.

Dean’s character development was mostly in the form of being a big brother for, what I view as being, the first time. In the pilot, Dean was mostly just concerned about keeping Sam around rather than being a big brother to him.

Favorite scene: My favorite scene in this episode is the scene in the beginning of Act Three where Dean asks Sam about why he’s so angry and Sam asks Dean how he handles hunting so well. It’s an interesting point of vulnerability for Sam, plus it’s where the show's “mission statement,” if you will, is brought up for the first time. It’s also where that big brother stuff I talked about comes in. This scene sets us up for a season where the boys are on the road hunting, despite the fact that the original goal of finding John is always under the surface. It’s a good scene for the brothers but also for the show.

Favorite moment: There’s this moment toward the end of Act Five where Dean is taunting the wendigo and refers to himself as “white meat,” and I don’t know, that moment stood out to me for some reason.

Iconic quote: “I think he wants us to pick up where he left off. You know, saving people, hunting things. The family business.”

That’ll be all for this episode. Honestly, I’ll rewatch this one if I’m doing a full rewatch like I am now, but it is definitely not in the category for “best episodic episode of SPN.” It’s got good, old school SPN vibes, but not that good.

[mamusings]

Supernatural Season 1 Thoughts

So I'm rewatching mainly to distract myself from the dogs breakfast the show has descended into. But also because my feelings about the show as a whole are decidedly mixed. I come to it as a buffy fan. I've always been curious about spn as a successor show to buffy, but only watched thr first 13 seasons in 2020. Blame lockdown.

Anyway s1. Blinding start, blinding finish. But the middle is just too many MOTW episodes without enough season arc development. I keep wondering who the show is for. It feels aesthetically very male. Lots of blood, guns and violence. Well-realised horror feel - although I think it's hard to really feel fear when you dont particularly care about who might die. It's only when you threaten a major character death that things hit harder. Also the genuflecting to realism by drawing on urban myths feels like something for stereotypically 'male' rather than 'female'. Probably reflects my preferences that I was never to into the MOTW format some buffy fans loved and that I was always more interested in the story telling than realism or even consistency. Monsters as metaphors works better for me. But Spn is a much more cloistered universe. Two guys and their absent father is what s1 is about. But it dits weirdly between being comfort viewing and needing attention. There's much that starts to feel formulaic with MOTW episodes: Impala on the road scene, some rock music, an opener that gives you a new mystery and people to go with it blah blah. You can practically set your watch by the final denouement happening in the final 8 mins. It feels like the show is diligently checking off every myth and monster going which gets tedious. I found the need for setting up yet another family in danger was something that gets hard to care about. "Oh look a couple, someone's gonna die, shall I fast forward until sam and dean show up." And yet there are some interesting undercutting of the white working class vibe the show has. Two that stand out to me are: the 'female gazing' of the camera work off Sam and Dean. There's a lot of panning - are we getting in the boys with the guns and hardware and then offering up the handsome male bodies for women? I felt a little cheap, but they they are v cute. The other is having a black/bi racial woman play Dean's only serious love interest. The ghost truck thing is terrible but putting attitudes to race at the centre of this particular storyline was intriguing. Perhaps a counter balance to the overall wwc feel of things. (Full disclosure I am a black woman and I enjoyed seeing this - even tho I did have several moments of wondering was the predominant female look so uniform back then. All the girls have the same build (and did we all wear such low rise jeans?) plus long, wavy/curly hair...except Meg who basically has Sam's hairstyle ha ha)

What's impressive? The first few episodes give us a cluster of core lines: bitch/jerk, no chick flick moments, and the sibling dynamic This show hits its stride right in the pilot and wendigo is still one of the scarier episodes. Thats a really good opening shot imo.

It's no surprise that what's really riveting is Sam and Dean. But on rewatching I saw a lot more on why this is so interesting. Basically when the characters are introduced you first get Sam. He's your archetypal nice guy whis hot everything though for him. Stanford, girlfriend, friends, great test score but also and crucially hes likeable. Then you get Dean and hes introduced as a dick. Breaks in, wrestles Sam, comes on to/is sleazy with Sams gf. So cocky bad boy: check.

In the pilot dean is the annoying big brother to a t. So they set up two contrasting personalities. Dean is disrespectful to cops, Sam is embarrassed by it. Dean is into hunting, Sam is unwillingly persuaded. Dean is insensitive, Sam kinder and sweet. Dean plays dumb, Sam's the academic achiever. But what we witness over the course of the season essentially reverses this. Sam's the real rebel defying his father, Dean the obedient son. Dean gets a lot of scenes showing him make swift emotional connections esp with children or people in caretaker roles. Dean's very adult 'I'm 26 of course I go on hunts alone' is unmasked by the fact he gets Sam to help him because hes lonely. And Dean (often clumsily) tries to help Sam move on about Jess and open up about his nightmares. While the explicit dialogue casts Sam as the geeky loser brother what we see in this season is that the loser is actually Dean. Sam has friends, Sam has a relationship, Sam has a life he wants to get back to. Dean has no one and some of the hardest emotional hits this season are when his mask is lifted to show us just that. For instance shape shifter Dean voices his jealousy in Skin. Also Azazel taunts Dean about how he needs Sam and John in a way that they dont need him.

The closing episodes really bring some of these contrasts home. Dead Mans Blood gives us a great bonding scene between Sam and John, for me that's a moment where it falls into place that they so much in common that it leaves Dean on the outside. They both loved women they lost to a demon. For both of them (at this stage) the mission, as in killing this demon, matters more than family. Its Dean who constantly prioritises family, even while his family deprioritise him. Both Sam in Salvation and John in Devils Trap put sacrificing themselves to kill the demon as their first priority. Whereas Dean consistently argues for family, first persuading John that they are stronger together, then telling Sam that the three of us 'is all I have' in Salvation. The point gets hammered home in Devils Trap where Dean says (in case the stupid viewer missed it "you and Dad are a lot more alike..cant wait to sacrifice yourselves, but I'm going to be the one to bury you").

Much of the rest of the relationship development is about showing us the partnership Sam and Dean are developing. You see increasing ease in working together - maybe most cliched in how they toss weapons back and forth in Hell House. Plus that interesting sibling dynamic when you love someone and find them intensely annoying that feels enjoyable even if your own sibling relationship is nothing like it.

But what's interesting is that while Dean's character is revealed throughout the season. You see through the episodes the difference between his Dean presents himself and hiw he is, but dean doesn't change. Hes immature and emotionally driven I'd also savvy and brave. Its Sam who changes. Not in how he is, but in his priorities. Sam realises the good bit about Dean among the stuff that irritates him. But most importantly the final episode shows us Sam moving from thinking the mission is what matters just like John. To thinking his family matters more. He doesnt shoot Azazel inside John and when John berates him for it his look at the bloodied-up Dean in the rearview mirror speaks volumes.

It's all the more striking because thus argument has been the core dilemma for the last 3 episodes. It's also the crux of how Dean, for all his obedience, sees himself as falling short of who his father wants him to be. He cant turn his heart off. Its Dean who calls his dad sounding like a tearful little boy in Home. It's when John approves of him making the heart choice and using the colt to save Sam, that Dean realises it's not his father but Azazel speaking. I find that painful to watch it's been so well set up. You get lots of preview of Dean really wanting approval and when it finally comes and you're all ahh fsmily bonding, Dean puts it together and goes you're not my father. Ouch.

Absent fathers and eventually I guess an absent God is a big spn theme. So there is something to say for looking at it in this season. John's absence is the driver of the whole season. But it's also the foundation stone of both Sam and Dean's character. What we get most of in s1 is a sense of the impact of his fathers absence on Dean. The childhood neglect, but also the absence of approval. My European background always makes it jarring when children address their father as sir so I hope I'm not over reading this. When John gets back the way it emasculates Dean is jarring. The jumping to attention with the yessirs and the following orders is such a distance from the cocky law breaker. Its interesting that the first scenes in which I recall the boys speaking in unison are these yessirs. But the scene I remember most is a trivial one, Dean offers John a machete out of Babys messy looking trunk - hes already been pulled up by dad for inadequate car maintenance. But John pulls a bigger, better, cleaner machete out of his high spec truck - Dead Mans Blood. Sums it up for me. Dean is so eager for approval, his father withholds it so casually. Sam is less like this, because he had Dean to parent him however ineptly. Sam did not have a hoid parent in Dean, but Dean showed up. Sam starts to make that realisation in season 1 and there are a few thank you moments. Contrast Dean's only outburst against his father when hes admonished to call when in trouble. He takes a leaf out of Sam's book and notes that they did call in Lawrence and they called when Dean was dying in Faith, hes angry and rightly so. John didn't show. But its interesting that Dean's fight with John sounds like a child fighting with a parent. It even ends with 'I dont care for your tone' from John even as he accepts Dean's point. Constrast Sam and John who have a much deeper ongoing disagreement. But Sam fights his father from an adult position. He's not looking for approval or acceptance, Sam claims his ground, argues his point. Dean still just needs to be loved.

But as well as the impact of the absent parent there is also having grown beyond the parent. I feel like the final few episodes show us that 'the boys' have surpassed their father. John's fake colt idea is lame and Dean calls it. By contrast the devils trap at Bobby's to catch Meg feels like a moment of brilliance particularly as the trap is sprung on the viewer so we feel surprised too.. Sure they call in help from Bobby, but what they do is well planned and they pull it off. And calling in helo when you need it us grown up.

Theres an element of fate vs character exploration when it comes to Sam and Dean. What happens to Sam is fate. It's not related to how he is or how he behaves. We find that out more fully soon. Whereas what happend to Dean relates to his character. IMO Dean actually has the option of walking away from hunting that Sam tried to exercise. Unlike Sam, hunting wouldn't have pursued Dean by killing his girlfriend. But Dean's character means he doesnt chose to walk away because family is important to him, in a way that it isn't for Sam until the end of this season. Its interesting that Sam perceives of himself as having choices he doesn't have. Whereas Dean sees himself as having no choice, when in fact he does. But I guess we don't know that yet so maybe the argument doesn't work?

#supernatural #sam #dean #winchester

[castiel-angel-of-my-heart]

SPN Rewatch: Pilot (1x01)

Here we go, Lawrence, Kansas

"Good night, Sam"

Baby Sam is so cute Okay

Mary Don't Do It Go Back To Sleep

Also: Mary not being played by Samantha is odd

Don't worry, John. Sam's okay. Just got fed a little demon blood.

tAkE yOuR bRoThEr oUtSiDe dOn'T lOoK bAcK

Pouty Sammy Face

And,,,, John's lost it

Oh, hi Jess

HE'S SO YOUNG OH

"Not exactly the Brady's"

CRASH AND BURN NOT FUNNY WHAT

Spooky atmosphere leading up to Dean fucking around. Perfect, I love it.

"Out of practice"

DEAN IS SO YOUNG AND FULL OF HOPE AND-

seriously tho pre-hell Dean

Too Good For Sam hahaha

THERE IT IS DEAN SAID THE LINE

Sorry Sam, no getting out of it now. He said the line.

Okay, taking less notes because,,,, I'm missing stuff. I'll watch the rest of the episode an recount what I can remember:

I love that rephrase. He has to clarify that John was on a hunting trip and then Sam goes, "oh. oh SHIT."

DRIVER PICKS THE MUSIC, SHOTGUN SHUTS HIS CAKEHOLE

I love Sam being uncomfortable with the IDs and the credit cards and everything

Also: Sam hasn't hunted in a long while, and it just comes back to him so naturally?? It's so sad tbh but so interesting to watch

Dean Let Sam Search He's School Boy

"Who The Heck Is In Your Car At This Hour" *Dean holds up keys* "oh it's the ghost okay"

HIS BOOBS ARE REAL IT'S OKAY

Do they?? Have a code for, "shit uh so the police are here"??

That Fucking Journal

Sam you feel bad about credit card scams but not about making this poor old man cry? Pick your battles I guess.

Agh I can handle a lot of the shit this show throws at us but I HATE dead children. They're just EXTRA creepy. I have no idea why, but I do not appreciate a child who will Eat My Face.

Dean don't be so dissapointed. Sam will be joining you on your hunt.

And... RIP Jess

Sam I'm Sorry No No Sad Boi

wasn't this all like intricately planned by azazel and luci because i think so but i don't remember

And Then They Never Stop

[claudiabian]

lucifer appearing as dead partners so he will be let in

nick & sarah / sam & jess / vince & jen / dean & cas

[johnwinchesterhateacc]

I posted 2,893 times in 2021

22 posts created (1%)

2871 posts reblogged (99%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 130.5 posts.

I added 84 tags in 2021

#videos - 42 posts

#supernatural - 8 posts

#spn - 8 posts

#fun posts from my main - 8 posts

#prev tags - 4 posts

#castiel - 4 posts

#cas - 3 posts

#dean winchester - 3 posts

#cas winchester - 2 posts

#castiel winchester - 2 posts

Longest Tag: 122 characters

#there were two full episodes dedicated to the fact that chuck gave sam and dean 'extra luck' bc theyre the main characters

My Top Posts in 2021

#5

Ao3 is showing me the wrong numbers so I'm trusting y'all to keep me updated

2 notes • Posted 2021-08-09 07:29:00 GMT

#4

So what do y'all think happened to Jesse after 5.6? Because that's such an interesting plot point and then it's never brought up again. Like, I think it's kinda implied he goes to Australia, but what happens once he's there? He's eleven, I don't think he can fully take care of himself. I just want the poor kid to be ok.

3 notes • Posted 2021-05-06 22:29:48 GMT

#3

I started rewatching supernatural end of last year and I've been putting off finishing it, I'm in the middle of season 15, and I think I might finish it on the 5th

3 notes • Posted 2021-11-01 22:10:01 GMT

#2

Dean said "if we don't keep living, then all that sacrifice is gonna be for nothing" and then proceeds to die 30 minutes later

3 notes • Posted 2021-11-06 02:33:39 GMT

#1

I finally watched 15.18 for the first time and Babes I Am Not Doing Great

4 notes • Posted 2021-11-05 05:08:12 GMT

Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →

[mycasandstarrs]

SPN 01X01: “Pilot”

I’‘“cI personally believe (and know) that I have a bit of an issue with not knowing how much to share about myself, but I figured I’d tell y’all a bit about my history with the SPN Rewatch experience.

I actually participated in last year’s SPN Rewatch and had a lot of fun with it! I had originally wanted to liveblog it on here but chickened out at the last moment and ended up liveblogging it (so to speak) in my journals. When Hurricane Harvey hit, the Rewatch was the thing that kept me going and gave me a sense of stability.

I’m more than happy and excited to be doing this all over again, with the added bonus of liveblogging here on my blog! I’ve got a good chunk of time on my hands and I figured it would be good character development for me to do this publicly, so without further ado, here is my liveblogging of S1EP1 “Pilot”.

Lawrence, Kansas. 22 years ago. 

“Come on, let’s say good night to your brother.” Mary’s first words on the show.

“’Night, Sam.” Dean’s first words.

“Hey Dean.” John’s first words.

They seemed like such a normal, happy, loving family. *cries*

I think the show does a great job of setting up Mary as a regular housewife and the Winchesters as an ordinary family; it made me believe at very first viewing that what happened to them next was just an unfortunate stroke of luck, as opposed to something that was in the works and destined for them for years, hell, decades.

(I’m noticing old, vintage wedding photos. Are they the wedding photos of John and Mary’s parents?)

“Sammy? Sammy!” Mary’s last words.

And there’s the scream of horror.

Oh, jesus christ. Nothing prepared me for that death and even now my stomach turns seeing Mary on the ceiling like that. RIP Mary Winchester.

“Take your brother outside as fast as you can and don’t look back! Now Dean, go!”

(Little baby Sammy was so cute.)

Our first (silent) title card!

Enter Jess. “Sam! get a move on! We were supposed to be there like 15 minutes ago. Are you coming or what?”

I don’t know the exact details of the night Sam left for Stanford (besides the blow out fight between Sam and John) but at some point Sam packed the photo of his parents and he has it out on display in his apartment. That’s incredibly sweet.

THERE’S OUR SAMMY! 

Proud girlfriend Jess leads a toast to Sam and his LSAT score. (174!)

There’s a notable concern in Jess’ eyes when Sam tells them that his family doesn’t know about his stunning achievement. Did she ever ask about Sam’s family or did she ever plan to ask about them?? She seems like the type to let things go if someone asked her to, but eventually it had to be worrying her...like here.

“I’m proud of you. And you’re gonna knock ‘em dead on Monday and you’re gonna get that full ride. I know it.”

“What would I do without you?”

“Crash and burn.”

*screams in foreshadowing*

Jess was such a good and supportive girlfriend. Sensing that Sam didn’t have a good upbringing/home life, she really goes the extra mile to show her support for him, which I’m sure Sam deeply appreciated.

And there's my beloved Dean!

AWWW THOSE BABY VOICES.

Ah so, Jess knew Sam had a brother.

LMAO @ Sam for pulling the “Whatever you have to say to me, you can say it in front of her” card.

THEN he tries to fucking be a smartass when Dean tries to put it delicately. (”Dad hasn’t been home in a couple of days.”)

And finally, there’s the backfiring on Sam’s part when Dean says the now famous (and later paralleled) line:

I can see the Lucifer/Michael parallels as early as right here: Sam, rebellious and angry at the absent father vs Dean, dutiful and loyal to the absent father.

“You think mom would have wanted this for us?”

No, Sammy, she did not.

“I can’t do this alone.”

“Yeah, you can.”

“Yeah...well i don’t want to.”

Still true to this day.

The Impala’s arsenal! Still so awesome.

“Dad let you go on a hunting trip by yourself?”

On first viewing, I immediately thought, “Dude, he looks old enough to be on his own” just as Dean said:

“I’m 26, dude.”

and that’s the exact moment I claimed him as my favorite.

Wow, 3 weeks? No wonder Dean was worried.

WHOA how did Sam have THAT KIND OF BLADE WITH HIM??

“Hey, everything’s gonna be ok. I promise.” Sam’s last words to Jess. Oh jesus, why.

I got fucking jumpscared by the show, goddamn it.

Welp, RIP Troy. I’d feel worse for him if he hadn’t tried to cheat on his girlfriend.

Real rich of Sam ragging on Dean about the credit card scams, when about 9 years later (S10) he offers to teach Claire about the very same thing. That’s A+ character development coming up.

“Driver picks the music, shotgun shuts his cakehole.”  

(I think this is Dean’s first “Sammy” of the show, no?)

agH Netflix still hasn’t got the right music for this season. No AC/DC for me here. :(

I love seeing Sam’s ~shocked~ face at all the fake ids. What an innocent baby.

Posing as federal Marshals.

“You two are a little young for marshals, aren’t you?”

“Thanks, that’s awfully kind of you.”

LMAOO. I wish I can brush shit off like that. #goals.

That accurate display of sibling culture: 

Now posing as Troy’s uncles. (Really? Uncles?)

Sam and Dean: “What do they talk about?” (That synch up!!!)

The first scene Jensen and Jared filmed together: the library research scene. :’)

1981. Constance Welch, 24 y.o, jumps off a bridge. An hour before the suicide she called 911 to report that her kids were dead in the bathtub. “Our babies were gone, and Constance just couldn't bear it," said husband Joseph Welch.”

At the crime scene. A bro fight is a-brewin’.

“Even if we do find the thing that killed her, Mom's gone. And she isn't coming back.”

Them’s fightin’ words!

Wait about 11 years on that, Sam.

Dean is loyal to both absent parents.

And Sam didn’t even apologize for that! Dude, wth. (Tho Dean didn’t apologize for slamming him into the bridge, so I guess its even.)

There’s Constance.

“Who’s driving your car?”

*Dean holds up car keys*

lmao.

How fucking athletic of Sam to hold onto the side of the bridge, hot damn.

Then there’s poor Dean covered in mud.

“That Constance chick, what a BITCH.”

“You smell like a toilet.”

Sam picking his first lock on the show.

Just noticed that John had an area on the wall dedicated to “Deals and Demons”. ohohoho, hoo boy.

Monster of the Episode: Woman in white (Constance Welch.)

Oh there we go, Sam’s apologizing for what he said on the bridge.

“Hey, no chick flick moments.”

“All right, jerk.”

“Bitch.”

John had a photo of him and the boys. :’)

Oh, Sam’s listening to a voicemail left by Jess.

Welp, cops. 

“So come home soon, okay? I love you.” Jess’ last words to Sam.

“So. Fake US Marshal. Fake credit cards. You got anything that's real?”

“My boobs.”

I fucking love S1!Dean. What a babe.

Dean, er, “Ted Nugent” is in “real trouble” here.

John’s journal. Unceremoniously dumped on the table in front of Dean.

“DEAN 35-111″

Joseph Welch.

Sam, now posing as a reporter.

Sam taking a plunge and telling Joseph about the Woman in White. 

Welp, he got kicked out but he got the info he needed.

Out goes Dean, courtesy of Sam’s fake 911 call as a distraction.

“I’m taking you home.” OOOHHHH THAT ONE LINER THOO

Aaand he drives the Impala into the house. 

Creepy ghost children. 

Oh good lord. RIP Constance Welch, again and permanently.

They are the absolute cutest :)

Blackwater Ridge, Colorado.

Aww Dean. He got so used to having Sam around. :(

“I’ll take you home.”  Makes me sad that S1!Sam’s “home” was a place without Dean and Dean knew it.

“You know, we made a hell of a team back there.”

Dean’s goodbye, because actually saying “goodbye” would hurt too much. (Or maybe he was trying to plant the seed of “come hunting with me” in Sam’s mind...)

Sam enters his apartment...goes into his bedroom (eating something too, maybe the cookies Jess was baking?)

And there it is. RIP Jessica Moore, died the exact same day and way that Mary died.

Ugh god, that instance when Dean looks up and sees Jess on the ceiling. That one tiny moment of shock, horror, and realization that that’s how his mother died too. Jesus, Jensen’s a good actor.

And then it’s straight to saving Sam.

One brother pulling the other brother away from his lover to save his life, at the cost of leaving the brother’s loved one behind. Totally won’t be repeated later on in the series...

Dean doesn’t even know what to say to Sam. I don’t blame him.

OOHHHH!!!!!!

And that’s the Pilot. One of my favorite Pilots of any of the tv shows that I watch, and a pretty good episode for Supernatural. I love revisiting the baby faces and voices of the brothers, and I love pointing out all the things that are gonna change for the brothers in upcoming seasons (from Sam’s disdain of credit card scams to Mary “not coming back”).  Overall, an A+ episode for me.

[amwritingmeta]

SNAPSHOT META: 1x01 - PILOT

I’m rewatching the entire series over the summer - not only because my memory bank is in dire need of refreshing, but because what else are we supposed to do during hellatus? Meet up with friends, go to the park, enjoy the sunshine? *snorts with derision* (okay I’ll be doing that too) (I’m not staying in all summer watching SPN and writing meta) (*shiftiest eyes*) I wanted to do this as part of this awesomeness and will attempt to catch up. If I can’t: *shrug* What can I say? Real Life and all that. Yes, friends in the park with sunshine. (be honest) I work. A lot. Of the hours.

But to make it up to you, I’ve planned THIS

No, I’m not going to dress up as Marilyn Monroe and come to your house and shower you with champagne. (or am I?)  No, don’t be silly - I can’t do that! Instead, I’m going to encourage you all to drink! By introducing the Spectacular and Penultimate and so very Necessary Drinking Game. (*SPNDG for short) For those who do not partake of the alcohol or for those of you who are underage there will be soda pops involved. (considering how much I curse I sincerely hope each and every one of you are of age)

You with me here? AWESOME! This will be us come end of summer:

Though possibly not quite so fishy... Either way, we’ll be ready for S13, peeps!

So, I had this ambition to do this Snapshot Commentary thing for each episode, getting through one or two a day. This post has taken me four days, the hours I’ve had to invest interspersed unevenly at best, and @margarittet was nice enough to do the maths - my ambition would take me over two years to fulfil at this pace. Yah. And as I lack a Time-Turner (god I wish I had one WHY JK ROWLING??) I may just have to watch the series as planned and write meta on the episodes that stand out as deeper narrative beats, both plot and character wise. Fuck. I already know there are so many of them. But I’m excited to get started! Writing this meta has been so much fun and I hope you’ll enjoy it.

I know I’m probably repeating stuff someone else has already said, but do you know what, I haven’t gotten to say it, so I’m saying it for myself now. Keep a lookout for them drinking prompts, because that means fun times up ahead, and don’t forget to drink responsibly. (remember nesnej) (oh god we’re all gonna get sloshed) (or very, very high on sugar)

Here we go!

Snapshot Commentary: 1x01 - PILOT

Mary and John are Good Parents

Sam is the cutest baby e.v.e.r

Young Dean worships his father already 

Flickering lights are always sinister

Baby monitors are always freaky

Guys standing ominously in shadow are super-disconcerting 

MARY, THAT WAS NOT JOHN!

Oh, the pain of that fiery death is just… no

And, of course, Dean is handed Sammy to look after and to save —- *ow*

“It’s okay, Sammy.” —- *ow*

Why did little baby Sammy have to see his mother burn on the ceiling?? —- *OW*

Jessica is a beautiful girl

Jessica needs to wear more clothes

I worry Jessica may catch cold 

Lightly Clad Female adulation: *Tequila Time

Sam is gorgeous

Sam doesn’t buy into Halloween

Sam is smart as all fuck

Sam isn’t close to his family

Jess is his family: she believes in him, encourages him, is proud of non-hunter him

The character intro of Dean fucking Winchester: an Intruder Cloaked in Shadow (friend or foe, we don’t know - remind you of anyone?) 

Them boys got them fighting skills down

*no. 1 - BEER

Jessica is a beautiful girl

Jessica needs to wear more clothes

I worry Jessica may catch cold

*no. 2 - Ladies Man Dean switching on the skeeze charm

There’s good reason to be afraid of the dark

Them boys hunt them things that there’s good reason to be afraid of

Them boys kill them things and save lives

Dean takes pride in this - Sam is trying to move on from it: root of brotherly conflict revealed and we are at minute 8:55, peeps

Dean: So what’re you gonna do? You just gonna live some normal, apple pie life, is that it?

Wait, what? Pie is synonymous with what?

*no. 3 - PIE

Sam: No. Not normal - safe.

Dean manipulates Sam reaches out because he does not want to do this alone, even though Sam more or less just told him that all he wants to be is safe from all of it: dick move, Dean - but then, without it, there’d be no story

Sam gives in — brodependency already in full swing

Baby <3

*no. 4 - Impala Weapons Stash

Sam is incredulous that Dean got to go on a hunting trip alone, which tells us John was always an Overbearing Parent, but…

Dean points out he’s twenty-six - an adult, meaning John trusts him to take care of himself

Conversely: in the original pilot script “Jack” (John’s original name was Jack) (yeah, I know, right?) makes a distinct, but brief, difference between his two sons: Baby Sam can have Dean’s room if baby Sam sleeps through the night. This may be an innocent promise, but it’s still telling of what John’s relationship with his boys was always meant to be. Sam is more important and Dean is left to fend for Sam, and to fend for himself.

Headcanon -> John was only overbearing for as long as Sam was still there. When Sam chose to leave, John started splitting up from Dean for longer and longer stints of time, leaving Dean to truly fend for himself. Dean is telling Sam the truth: he doesn’t want to do this alone anymore, he’s been completely alone from the day Sam left and Dean is a pack animal, someone for whom family is everything, it’s what’s been drilled into him since he was four years old and probably before then. Who is he if he’s not taking care of Sammy? For two years, no, for longer than that, he’s been trying to find out and he’s come up short. Bottom line? Dean Winchester is lonely and he misses his brother, misses the purpose he always gave him, craves that purpose like a drug. Without Sammy - Dean is lost, because all his life all he’s ever tried to be was John Winchester, so that he’d be strong enough to keep Sam safe, and keeping Sam safe meant that perhaps their dad would be proud of him, but without Sam, modelling himself on John loses its meaning, and if he’s not emulating John Winchester, then who is he supposed to be? He doesn’t know. And, quite possibly, the thought of finding out feels like a complete betrayal of everything his father ever taught him. Because you never give up on family, and that has always been a double-edged sword.

Minute 12:53

Jericho, California

I can never go home…… *chills*

Jessica is a beautiful girl

Jessica needs to wear more clothes

I worry Jessica may catch cold

Hottest Woman in White ever - them victims never stood a damn chance - maybe if you didn’t throw yourself at men with wives and girlfriends, Hotness, they wouldn’t be tempted to cheat *eye roll* (female representation too often sucks)

Friendly Reminder: Lightly Clad Female adulation means fucking *Tequila Time, y’all

Sidenote: as much as I love how this episode is resolved, I do find that there’s a big gaping logic hole in this antagonist’s motivation when the Woman in White is killing men because her husband was unfaithful, and yet she is clearly not averse to literally forcing her victims into a compromised position, in essence she’s raping them before killing them. She’s a vengeful spirit and she’s seeing red, meaning she can’t actually weigh the good and bad in her decisions, and I get that, but seriously? She’s killed ten men over twenty years. Why not more? Why not only target those that are up for it by their own volition then, if you’re going to be so damn picky? Meh. Whatever.

Minute 18:21

*No. 5 - Every time they say the word “agent” have a drink of water (I’m not a sadist) (well I am a little) (like Misha Collins) (so there’s a bit of goodness) (to my badness) (water is life) (and helps against massive hangovers) 

Dean doesn’t have a whole lotta respect for the lawmen 

(Jensen has the biggest, greenest eyes)

Sam is empathic - in touch with his emotions

Empathy makes Dean fidget - out of touch with his emotions or, you know, unwilling to touch them

Constance Welch - Hottest Woman in White Ever has a name, glory be!

Please hold for some Dialogue Deconstruction…

Here’s the Bridge Exchange between the brothers:

Sam: Dean, I told you, I’ve gotta get back by— Dean: Monday. Right. The interview. Sam: Yeah. Dean: You’re really serious about this, aren’t you? You think you’re just gonna become some lawyer? Marry a girl… Sam: Maybe. Why not? Dean: Does Jessica know the truth about you? I mean, does she know about the things you’ve done? Sam: No, and she’s not ever going to know. Dean: Well, that’s healthy. You can pretend all you want, Sammy, but sooner or later you’re going to have to face up to who you really are. Sam: And who’s that? Dean: You’re one of us. Sam: No. I’m not like you. This is not going to be my life. Dean: You have a responsibility. Sam: To dad? And his crusade? If it weren’t for pictures I wouldn’t even know what mom looks like. What difference would it make? Even if we were to find the thing that killed her, mom’s gone, and she’s not coming back. Dean: Don’t talk about her like that.

This exchange tells us so much about these two men, their past, their present frame of mind, stating the conflict in their different points of views. Oh, my Kripke. *salivating*

Dean

thinks a normal life is a pipe dream

which is confirmed as the truth by Sam finding it necessary to lie to Jessica

leading to Dean calling Sam out on the unhealthiness of denying who you really are (!!!)

Now for the underlying conflict this exchange highlights: Dean needs his brother back in the family business. His face when he tries to throw the responsibility barb at Sam and Sam shakes it off - Dean looks hurt, he was speaking for himself here, not John and as we’ll learn, Dean practically raised Sam, so for Sam to find it so easy to leave him behind, to not even take him into account, it must hurt like all hell

Dean is protective of Mary’s memory: whether it’s out of loyalty to her or loyalty to John is hard to tell at this point, right? Mary’s memory has shaped Dean’s life, and of course he has his own memories of her, but is he protective of her as his mother or as the motor behind his entire existence, which Sam is more or less calling bullshit on here? Maybe it’s both. Maybe they’re irrevocably the same at this point. 

Dean is a foot soldier: he’s had his reason for existing drilled into him from when he was old enough to have it drilled into him that this is who he is and this is all there is to him, there is no questioning orders, there is no breaking away from it, there is nothing else out there more important than family

Dean is loyal and duty bound, displaying a softly selfish streak as he pulls Sam back into the life, as well as giving us hints of that deep insecurity when it comes to his own identity, an insecurity that we’ll get to know so well over the seasons (remind you of anyone?)

Lets’ look at the exchange again, this time from Sam’s POV:

Sam

that “maybe” denotes a hint of uncertainty 

that turns into defensiveness

because deep down he’s afraid that Dean’s right and there’s no “normal” to be had for him

and, as with most things, a twofold: we’re heading into dark territory with Sam and this uncertainty is subtle foreshadowing of how he’s always felt different and out of place

but as we’ll come to learn about Sam, once he stops beating against the hunter side of himself, he’ll find his MoL side, his Leader side, and that journey starts right here as well, in this subtle show of uncertainty, because what Sam truly needs ain’t ever going to be “normal”

it’s funny when Sam tells Dean he’s nothing like him, because the truth is: Sam beat Dean in that first scuffle, Sam found the name of the Woman in White, Sam picked the lock at the motel, Sam concluded John’s in trouble by examining the room, Sam got Dean out of jail by placing a prank call and, of course, Sam’s going to resolve the episode by taking action

so obviously Sam is a hunter to the bone - and he’s better at it than Dean

it’s lovely that Sam immediately ties John’s hunt for Mary’s killer to Christianity by dubbing it a “crusade” - very subtle foreshadowing here

Sam is so over all of it: he is all about free will and his right to exorcise it, not buying into the crap John is selling, not seeing the point, if there ever was one - it won’t bring their mother back, she’s gone, they need to move on with their lives

as he says to Dean in their earlier exchange: Mary wouldn’t have wanted this for them, and of course we know Sam’s right in this assumption

but that said, Sam also has loyalty and a sense of duty, rooted in love for his family, and though he knows who he wants to be, there’s a clear insecurity about who he can be 

he’s just not ready to sacrifice his sense of self for someone else’s idea of what is the right thing to do with his life

It’s the classic Hero’s Journey setup for Sam, of course: without resistance there’s no possibility for growth. If the Hero begins in a place where he’s comfortable with the journey he’s about to be launched onto then the necessity for him making the journey disappears and there’s no hook into the narrative. (remind you of anyone?)

Minute 24:43

Jump up on the railing, boys. The railing. THE RAILING, BOYS, THE CAR CAN’T GET TO YOU IF YOU’RE… oh, forget it.

Even covered in mud you are one hot cookie, Dean Winchester

John Winchester is a pro

John Winchester is detail oriented (MoL)

John Winchester is clever

John Winchester is in trouble (stakes raised)

Sam apologises for what he said about John and Mary and Dean deflects the sentiment with a “Hey, no chick flick moments” — *awww*

*No. 6 - whenever Dean DEFLECTS SENTIMENT we toast each other with a RAWR

*No. 7 - whenever Sam tries to get Dean to talk we toast the TV with a JERK! BITCH!

On Dean Donning John’s Leather Jacket: I reblogged some gorgeous meta just the other day on this topic and couldn’t add my own thoughts because I simply didn’t have enough of an opinion. @dustydreamsanddirtyscars I still feel your meta was beautiful and that’s why I wanted it on my blog *head still bowed to you*, I also see how Dean is drowning in that jacket and all it symbolises, but I will agree with @elizabethrobertajones, who pointed out that the jacket is a visual metaphor for Dean shouldering responsibility for the family business, and I’d even like to delve a little deeper into what the jacket represents for me in this moment in time.

Firstly, I’d just like to point out how utterly downplayed this moment is in the pilot. If I hadn’t been aware of the jacket being John’s I wouldn’t even have registered how significant Dean sliding it on actually is, given how the episode plays out. We’re at minute 28:44 and the fact that there’s a ring of salt on the floor of John’s motel room has told the boys that John was worried, that he was trying to keep something out. The possibility of something truly bad having happened to their father is beginning to seem more and more likely to the brothers.

But, secondly, what is so interesting about Dean grabbing his father’s jacket is that he does it casually, without a second thought. It tells us John clearly wouldn’t mind Dean wearing his jacket, or Dean would have left it where it is. To me, this shows a bond. (As does the fact that John has given Dean his car, but that’s for later meta.) It shows a closeness between father and son because they’ve been united in their hunt for Mary’s killer and Dean has earned his father’s respect and trust, no matter how absent John is in Dean’s life. What Dean needs is his father’s love and acceptance and, of course, these he can’t ever have because Dean isn’t comfortable enough in himself to ever admit this is what he needs. And if he can’t admit it, then how can he ask for it?

So Dean dresses himself in his father’s clothes and steeps himself in his father’s image (down to driving his car and listening to his music) in order to connect with his father, because regular Dean has never been quite enough. And, furthermore, Dean emulates his father in order for Dean to do his duty, to be the responsible one, to look out for Sammy. It’s what he’s been doing for twenty-two years so donning his father’s jacket in this scene is casual because it’s what Dean does every day of his life, it’s who he already is - an extension of John Winchester.

It’s why the significance of this moment is downplayed, rather than acting as foreshadowing for what’s to happen to Jessica in ten minutes by underlining the fact that something bad must’ve happened to John - because this isn’t what this moment is there for, it’s simply an extremely subtle way of planting the visual information of how Dean is already a shadow of his father.

Note: they begin putting deeply emotional and key character moments entirely in visual subtext from day one. This is how they write this show and how they have always written this show. Because they are amazing writers and this is how amazing writers write shit down. A good screenplay needs to work on multiple levels and deliver on this type of thing in every scene, because each scene is meant to be a building block for the narrative and the foundation for the narrative is subtext.

Writing a good screenplay is not easy or straight forward, it takes a lot of consideration for what details actually matter to the narrative as a whole and that consideration is always based in knowledge of your character’s backstory and, preferably, at least some notion of their endgame. Though endgames change and aren’t an absolute necessity, I’d say it’s very difficult to steer a narrative without even a loose destination in mind.

And look at how the brother’s are set up in the pilot: this is the relationship we’re going to follow for the coming twelve years, and the core conflict is right there, in their first scene, enhanced in this exchange I’ve just briefly deconstructed. It is meticulously crafted writing. (I just cannot EVEN)

Minute 29:40

Dean gets bent over the hood of a car and yeah, he likes it - there is no reason for him to like it that much, except for this actually being one of those downplayed visual character moments that would give the casual viewer insight into Dean enjoying being bent over things by men in uniform, if it wasn’t so ambiguous (we know though) (we know) (the foreshadowing for Dean’s bisexuality, and him being privately ok with it, too - look at that smile - is starting right here, guys) (IN THE PILOT)

So Dean previously dissed the cops for not having a clue

Now he’s their only clue to solving the murder

This leads Dean to the biggest clue he’s found in his John Winchester investigation

John Winchester’s JOURNAL (god that’s a great visual) (you can hear the weight of this revelation as the journal hits that table like a brick) (I wish I had a GIF)

Thank you, @elizabethrobertajones!! 

(I wish I had a million dollars)

Now, Dean dissing the cops when he and Sam first arrive on the crime scene and actually  being proven wrong - because these cops clearly have eyes and ears on alert - is good, this tells us Dean’s not as slick as he thinks he is

Sam being the empath again - gently interrogating Constance Welch’s husband

until he switches on the badass - because Sam is not beyond pushing for the truth and pushing buttons to get to it: logic and gut instinct stemming from emotional intelligence, I would argue, because Sam has always been honest with himself and tried his hardest to follow his heart

the fact that Dean so easily slips out of the station WITH THE JOURNAL reaffirms the fact that Dean is good at what he does - granted with assistance from Sam: this instils in us the confidence that Dean knows what he’s doing, getting himself out of the jam he got himself into (possibly this was an unintentionally planted soundbite, but the Getting Themselves Out of Jams They’ve Unintentionally Created For Themselves still hits a note that will echo through the entire series)

John’s left Jericho and he didn’t take his journal (the plot thickens)

SHIT THERE’S A GHOST LADY IN THE MIDDLE OF THE ROAD SAMMY!!

And now she’s IN THE CAR WITH YOU SAMMY!! (stakes raised sky high) (she gonna kill you!) (don’t say oh hell yes!) 

Ok, good, there’s that cleverness I’ve come to know and love, Sam, good boy for telling her no, but of course, it’ll make no difference whatsoever because this ghost will violently murder you for getting excited by her cleavage and her grinding against your groin (but it really is ridiculous, though) (isn’t it?) (she’s afraid to go home, guys) (that’s her weak spot) (the only reason she switches on the seductress and Sam suddenly having no say in the matter is that they wanted Dean to fire that shotgun) (they wanted to show that there is more ways than one to beat back the supernatural on this show) (“I can’t ever go home” makes logical Sam understand her fear) (so Constance realising what he’s going to do - that he’s going to take her home - could’ve made her fight back) (in the way she took control of the car on the bridge) (which would take us to the need to use that shotgun) (there’s no damn reason for her to try and coerce Sam into being unfaithful) (it just negates her entire backstory - her believable and emotional motivation) (I like my Hottest Women in White evers to be well-rounded characters) (thank you very much)

(yes thank you) (this pilot has given insight) (with logic holes)

Again - I love this episode resolution: you go Sam! and then the water and, oh man —

— children in shadow at the top of stairs shot with a low angle are always creepy

Bye bye Constance (toilet flush noise) (hmm)

“--I’ll kill you” = Baby Love

Blackwater Ridge, Colorado

Oh, disappointment from Dean: Sam’s still not coming with him to meet up with John and make sure he’s ok

AC/DC singing “I’m on a Highway to Hell” as Dean pulls up to Sam’s door to drop him off - holy shit this show really does choose its music with care

Helluva team *chills*

Oh, cookies

Bookend to end all bookends

“We’ve got work to do.” *double-chills*

And what’s even more significant here is Sam’s character arc for this episode bookending as he’s spent the entire narrative beating against everything his father stands for to now - without hesitation, the love of his life having just died in the exact same way the love of his father’s life died - be stepping into the very shoes he’s always rejected, ready to walk that path of vengeance for Jessica’s sake.

Dean donned John’s jacket.

Sam, starting out stating how what he wants out of life is safety with/for the woman he loves, ends up picking up a shotgun.

Their fates and their choices are linked to and mirrored in John’s fate and his choices and the basis for all that’s to come is firmly in place by the end of this pilot episode. Isn’t it just marvellous?

Other Noteworthy Things:

Dean indulges in unhealthy food twice

Sam declines unhealthy food twice 

Dean says “house rules” about what goes on in the Impala and I have so many thoughts on what Baby symbolises, but “stability” and “home” are the foremost ones, so this brief line feels meaningful to me

A diner ->

A gas station ->

A motel ->

-> Settings we will become very familiar with

Cassette tapes (twelve years of cassette tapes)

Dean calls Sam out for being a control freak 

Let’s bask in the gorgeous irony Kripke establishes by making it clear that being a hunter means having to break the law and Sam’s ambition in life is to be a lawyer - it underscores the internal conflict so beautifully and underlines how Sam’s vision for his future truly is the absolute Opposite to how he’s been raised

Sam needing to distance himself from his family means he’s not welcome back

This was John’s decision

Headcanon: thinking how this most probably devastated Dean, but Sam figured Dean would stick by John without hesitation so he never bothered to contact Dean, while Dean, not hearing from Sam, figured Sam wouldn’t want him to bother him *slow tear*

And that is all from me on this gorgeous episode, peeps! Hope you found this informative!!

xx