#jeong jin man x you
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inkedobsidian · 8 months ago
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~ accidental co-parents ~
prompt: #26 “It was a joke baby, I swear.”
summary: Jin-Man is jealous that Y/N has spent her whole day taking care of Ji-An
pairing: Jeong Jin-Man x Reader
warnings: just fluff icl
word count: 870
a/n: Requests are open! Prompt list is there if you guys want extra ideas
Master-List - Prompts
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It had been nearly 3 days of Y/N curled up in a chair at Ji-An’s bedside. They didn’t really know what was going on with Ji-An but the constant fever and puking just led to Y/N taking up temporary residence on the shitty chair at Ji-An’s bedside. Jin-Man did what he could, bringing coffee to Y/N every couple of hours and delivering the 3 meals they needed to eat but other than that he kept his distance.
Jin-Man didn’t realise how lonely the house would feel with the 2 of them cooped up in that room and maybe it was also the fact that because Ji-An has not been at school that he hasn’t spent anytime with Y/N. Even if they didn’t speak it was the way they existed around each other that he missed. Handing each other coffee’s without spoken words just because you know the other one.
It was almost as if she could hear him thinking about her because she was walking out of Ji-An’s bedroom holding a small damp towel. She walked in silence not wanting to wake Ji-An up but the minute she caught eye contact with Jin-Man she shot him a smile and proceeded straight to the kitchen. He decided to move from his position on the couch and towards the sink.
“Y/N L/N. Are you going to be a nurse for every generation of my family?” Jin-Man joked quietly as Y/N was rinsing the small towel with cold water, a trick to try and keep Ji-An’s temperature down. Y/N had been Jin-Man’s right hand in Babylon and she was the one that patched him up the most, from there it was so natural for her to care for Ji-An in the same way.
“At least Ji-An is a good patient. That stings… that’s too tight… can you rewrap it.” Y/N deepens her voice to mock a moaning and in pain Jin-Man earning a quick hmm from the man himself. Y/N laughed after finishing the voice and turned the tap off beginning to ring out the towel so it was damp not dripping.
“I am brilliant while in pain, I am however bored out my mind in this house alone. How fast can you cure whatever this is.” Jin-Man had opened up and started speaking more casually with Y/N the more she was around and now they’d lived together for 5 years it was like he couldn’t exist alone. Y/N tried to hide the smile on her face when he so casually says that he misses her, even if that’s not exactly what he said. Y/N couldn’t believe that Ji-An was sick and he was here being clingy and jealous, she had to try her hardest to supress a laugh.
“Is there a way to cure you of your need to bother me?” Honestly if it was any other scenario then Jin-Man would’ve known that Y/N was just joking with him but maybe genuinely missing her made him take that a little too to heart. When he didn’t say anything Y/N looked up to see genuine hurt across his face and the shock of his reaction genuinely surprised her.
“It was a joke baby, I swear.” Y/N laughed finally turning her body away from the sink and finally facing towards Jin-Man. Then it was like a second wave of shock hit him.
“Baby..?” Jin-Man repeated it because he thought he didn’t hear her correctly. Then it was time for Y/N to realise what she said, maybe sleeping in the chair was starting to make her loose it. She stood there frozen with the towel in her hands trying to look anywhere in the kitchen that wasn’t the man stood in front of her. Then she finally darted her eyes to look at him and he was there looking at her with a look she’d not seen before. There was a softness behind his eyes that was new, of course he cared for and trusted her but this was different.
It was very easy for both of them to blur the lines the longer they lived together. When you’re on missions it’s different, it’s life and death. Here in the house, taking care of Ji-An and raising her together it was domestically normal. (If you ignore the black market website they run together) Almost as if it was like fate had decided to save this conversation for another day there were small footsteps from the hallway and a very sick and nauseous Ji-An rounded the corner.
“I’ll take care of her you look like you need to sleep in a real bed.” Jin-Man whispered towards Y/N as he gently took the small towel out of her hand placing it on the kitchen side. He moved the hair out of her face and gave her a small kiss on the forehead before picking up the towel again and walking back to the bedroom with Ji-An. Y/N just stood there in the kitchen for an extra second waiting for them to retreat to the bedroom but she heard one last thing from the hallway from a very sleepy and sick 14 year old that she probably wasn’t supposed to.
“Have you finally told her you like her?”
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lumizwrld · 1 year ago
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𝐈𝐧𝐭𝐨𝐱𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐏𝐮𝐬𝐬𝐲 🂼
"Even the most timidest guys have the heaviest thoughts…”
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➢ ¡Switch! Ryohei Arisu ♥︎ Black Fem Reader
☕︎ word count ・4.0k
(no cuz there's barely any smuts of him, so I gotta be the one to make some because he's so fine and nobody wanna give him love fr)
⚠︎NSFW WARNING⚠︎
cw ✐ intoxication, shy Arisu taking control of you, fingering, dick sucking, missionary, deprived reader and Arisu, submissive and dominant Arisu, whimpering, dirty talking, riding, overstimulation, teasing, nearly caught, sex in a hot tub, drunk sex
✍︎ Summary = Arisu and you had accompanied a blowout party right before Hatter's death and the 10 of Hearts game, he proposed you both ease and take some time into partying away the night, sipping your desperations away, and soon after you both ending up in a hot tub together. During your time, you both don't speak until the silence is broken, all these emotions end up being confessed, and soon after you find yourself on top of him, confessing a love of desire for each other. ✧
✄ This is literally my first ever smut LMAO but I've spent months trying to articulate this shit and IT'S FINALLY FINISHED. ♡ Sending much love to all who read this and like it #yallfrthebest♡
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Tranquility, the littlest ripple of water or even taking the slightest breath would disturb the moment of solitude between Arisu and you.
The pool deserted hours ago, leaving nothing but clutter and the two of you intoxicated. Unwinding in a hot tub, out of sight from the Beach. Nothing but emptiness appeared to run across your minds, speaking not a single word to each other in the past hour but rather the language of eye contact.
How deliberately his eyes had wandered on your frame, tilting his head with parted lips as his arms folded. He kept wondering what ran through your dazed mind, minding the fact of how lethargic you occurred to him. Your inanimate body sat in the same position for the past hour, eyes lost in the waves of the water while running your fingers through the tangles in your hair. Seemingly, at this moment, he had gazed intensely at your beauty, gradually scrutinizing every subtle part of you. He didn't comprehend why he felt so fond of you in this very moment, nor did he comprehend why his body began to erupt with ardor, nonetheless, he just felt so guilty to think of you in such a way. But how was it that this wasn't the first time he had thought of you like this before? How tensive the yearning of attaining a slight touch on your body besides your hands seemed like a wish come true to him, to feel the weight of your body rest on his lap, caressing your hips while you reflected down on him so passionately. Well, even the innocent-looking guys appear to have the heaviest thoughts.
Regardless, Arisu was way too shy of a guy to express any of that to you, considering how close you both were. So there he sat, withering in a lustful pool of desirable intentions of you, rewinding themselves in a constant motion. Curiouser and curiouser he thought, how would you feel if he were to make a slight move on you? What type of feelings did you have for him? Did your feelings fall in unison with his? He sighed, catching your attention accidentally.
“You tired Arisu?” You questioned, a small grin appearing on your face.
“Kind of.” He grinned in unison, “Are you?”
“Yeah, but I like it out here.” You responded, “It's peaceful, but it's been quiet for too long. How about we break the silence, do you know how long has it been since one of us has said anything?”
He chuckled, “I can’t even remember, but break the silence huh? In that case, how do you like it here?” He questioned, resting his elbow on the rim behind him.
“It's a vibe, most of the time. Then again it beats me how after the games everyone can just go back to normal and party as if nothing happened. Somethings up about this place but I can't seem to put my finger on it.” You claimed, embracing the sides of your body as you averted your eyes toward the water and then back to him, “What about you?”
“Yeah, it's the same for me.”
“It's so crazy, I still can't believe you're an executive, it shows how special you are Arisu.” You grinned.
“Heh, special? They only need me for the games, I'm not that important. Why do you think that?” He questioned, tilting his head curiously.
“You're able to figure a game out and win no matter the difficulty, I mean...I'm pretty good at solving games but I tend to have a bit of trouble.” You asserted, watching him smile softly.
“Hey! You're just as smart! Your confidence is what makes you special. Y'know sometimes I can be confident, well- barely most of the time. But with your confidence and how you get right into the game without needing help, it seems as if you don't even need me. Now that's something, I would say, special about you Y/N.” He conversed, slouching forward to you.
You giggled, “Thanks. Honestly, without you, I don't know where I would be.”
“Anytime. I can say the same for you Y/N.” He giggled in unison, gazing at you. “Hey...What are your thoughts right now? I know it's a bit off-topic but I wanna know what goes through your mind?” He uttered in curiosity.
“Well, nothing right now besides the next game.” You responded.
“There has to be something you're thinking about...I-I mean It's okay if you don't wanna talk about it I understand, but we can never just talk and have serious conversations that much, I wanna take this time to understand you more.” He expressed.
“Understand me more? That's so adorable of you to say. I...I really--Well, actually there is something.” You articulated as his eyes glistened, “Recently, I've been having these emotions...About someone. It's not that important but, I wonder what they feel about me.”
“S-Somone?”
“Yeah. I don't know...I’ve been feeling so heavy with keeping this building up inside me.”
He had maintained his breath, wondering, was this feeling towards him? Did she...finally find someone else? Who was this person, and what did she see in them? He brushed his chin, “Can you tell me about them?”
“Well, he’s a nice guy, but that's all I can say.” You grinned.
“Oh…I-I don’t know what to say I-" He stammered, "Do you have an emotional connection with him? How does he treat you? Has he ever made it evident on how he feels toward you?” He questioned, evidently uninterested yet uncomfortable to admit.
“Well, he never admitted it, he preferably holds in his feelings someway like me. However, I can tell he sees something in me…I-I might be wrong but…” You expressed, reflecting your gaze into his. However, he sat there so oblivious. Slowly averting his eyes from yours, he could feel nerves run down his spine as he observed you gradually swimming towards him, “He has to confirm it to me, otherwise, there's nothing else I can say about him.”
“T-Then you're gonna have to speak to him about it...” Arisu stumbled with dilated eyes, “Y/N, w-what are you doing?”
You tilted your head at him, relaxing your hands on his thighs, “Nothing, it's just funny how clueless you can be sometimes.”
“W-What do you mean? Clueless? Me?” He stuttered.
“Arisu, I love how innocent you are,” You emitted, softly giggling as a faint gasp fled his mouth. “You have something, that I never knew I could be so tempted to before. You think I don't know how you feel about me, yet...I see it all over your face.”
“I...I don't understand what you m-mean.” He stuttered as you watched his pale complexion shift.
“I hope you don't find it weird of me but, I hear you every night. Sweat runs down your face as you whine and groan in your sleep. I don't want to be weird but, I tend to observe you once in a while. There have been times I heard my name fly out of your mouth in a way that...Made me feel things at night. I see the way you are with me, that's why I have to be the one to initiate things. You’re so shy yet...You’re so bold with yourself that, you show it to me without even noticing that you're doing it.” You spoke softly, watching his eyes roam all over your face.
“Is…That bad?” He doubted, choking up with surprise.
“It’s adorable, really.”
“I…I-"
“Why are you nervous? Is it because I finally called you out on it?” You giggled as you slowly crept closer to his face.
“Y/N...I-I don’t know what to say I-” He spoke with chuckles in between, concealing his agitated state.
“Confirm it. Confirm those thoughts you have of me, Arisu.” You urged, lust sparkling in your eyes. “Why is that, you being so shy right now is making me feel so needy.” You expressed with your lips scarcely touching his.
“N-Needy? I'm making you needy?” He asked, embracing your arms tightly.
“Is that bad?” You reverted, watching him resist the urge to kiss you.
“N-No! I-I just didn't expect you to be so turned on right now...Y-You didn't have to call me out like that you know? For a second, I-I thought you were talking about someone else.” He doubted.
“I don't know. Maybe I was, maybe I was talking about-” You teased, sensing his hands bind your waist profoundly and arrange you on his lap roughly. “Who? Don't play around now” He asserted, evidently more confident than before, “You can't just take back what you said now can you?”
“Arisu-”
“What's wrong? You can tease me but I can't?” He uttered mischievously, releasing your waist and repositioning his hands on your wrists. “I don't think it would be fair now, would it?”
You deeply sighed, abruptly sensing the pounding of your heart. Surprisingly, he had reverted your energy. You didn't acknowledge how turned on you made him, scrutinizing his eyes satisfy themselves with lust as his breathing heightened. “What are you doing Arisu?” You contested, knowing his intentions with a grin.
“What you want me to do, confirm my feelings to you.” He whispered, seizing a kiss from your lips. He hauled your wrists to his neck, signaling you to grasp him as his hands went about on your waist. His words were assertive, yet, his kisses were subtle and deprived. You felt so vulnerable, sensing his trailing hands up your back towards the string of your bikini top.
“You say I'm bold? Then, let me express these feelings I have for you.” He pleaded, trailing his roaming hands down to your thighs gradually. “Let me show it by pleasing that deprived pussy of yours.”
“I-Arisu-” You whimpered, racing your fingers through the back of his hair.
“Was I too forward? Heh, I'm sorry about that. Do you want me to beg? How about I just beg- let me touch you, let me please.”
“I…I-" You choked, averting your eyes back and forth from his hands to his face.
“Please Y/N…I’ll do anything for you.”
You felt appalled, your pumping heart racing to a burst as you desired to risk it all for him. It was all your fault, teasing him was amusing until he revealed to be so deprived. Apparently, you adored every extent of his pleading.
“I was only teasing, I-I didn't mean to make you so-”
“Turned on? Horny? Eager to fuck you? Awe, but this is what you wanted Y/N.” He pleaded, reaching his face toward your neck “You say it's all over my face but...Your beautiful face says it all as well." He teased, darting his eyes at your adorable flustered face.
“Fuck.” You whined.
He delivered a giggle, fondling your inner thigh. “I know how shy I can be but, you made me think things through with myself and...” He spoke before, drawing aside your bathing suit and gliding his fingers into the folds of your pussy, “At this moment, I'm permitting myself to be confident with you.” You bounded your arms around his neck, feeling his fingers explore your pussy as he kept his eyes on you. Circling your clit gradually, he watched your body squirm slightly, making himself comfortable when he discovered the right spot to attend to.
“Ari-Arisu!" You gasped as his lips seized your neck, leaving kisses and subtle bites all over to overstimulate you. Your breathing became erratic, uncomprehending on whether to respire or moan. However, he carried support with which to focus, picking the momentum up when he caught your struggling state of fixation.
“Awe- keep saying my name beautiful. Your cries, the way how your body responds to my fingers, it's showing me how much you're enjoying this.”
“Stop being so cocky- fuck- please” You whined, bucking your hips as his free hand groped your tender breasts.
“Yeah? But your loving every moment hani, swaying your hips to the rhythm as you make beautiful songs along the lines? If only you could see how gorgeous you look right now Y/N.” He teased as he grasped your chin, seizing another kiss that forced you to moan in his mouth.
(Hani ~ Honey) inspo goes to @usetheeauthor
You could feel his fingers reposition themselves, his thumb this time circling your clit as two fingers began to entreat the entrance of your hymen. At this point, you had given up, permitting himself to stick his fingers all the way inside your needy pussy. His rough fingers, fucking your insides, making you toss your head back, whining his name as he reached closer to watch your reaction, “Yes Mommy, you like that huh? Fucking you like this with my fingers?” Arisu questioned with pleading eyes.
“Mommy?- Fuck- You are enjoying this aren't you-” You moaned in between your words, observing his innocent smile which made you smile in unison. You felt like such a slut at the moment, giggling intently while moaning for him to fuck you faster.
“Is making me feel like a slut turning you on? Is watching me ride your fingers like this while you sit there, make you throb?” You teased, watching his eyes dilate in shock. “You don't think I can’t see how badly you want to touch it?” You giggled.
His head was thrown back by your words, stopping the pace which allowed you to pose next to him. Squeezing your warm body next to his, wrapping your leg around his as your arm wrapped around his head, forcing him to look at you as you slowly trailed your fingers down his chest. This was all a little trap. “I see right through you, catching at all that confidence exposed like that, how I loved every bit of it. However,” You spoke, sensing his heart race, “You will always be a shy guy to me, and I tend to have a weakness for guys who-” You spoke whilst caressing his hardened bulge, “are so shy to even let a word form out of their mouths, Arisu.” You asserted.
“Hah-” He whimpered, with worried eyes and quivering lips as you kissed his cheek.
“You taking control yet, trembling immediately is so hot to me Arisu.” You whispered, reaching your way into his shorts.
“R-Really?” He trembled.
“Oh but yes puppy, so hot to where...I was desiring to fuck you so badly, letting your cum drip out of my pussy."
“Y-Y/N fuck-” He whined, sensing your hands grasp the tip of his dick.
“Yeah, just imagine, my pussy fucking you like this.” You insisted, stroking the tip.
Arisu jerked up instantly, huffing out a moan to the sensitivity while all you could do was giggle and stroke him faster. His tensive body rapidly reacting to your strokes made you torture him even more, whispering lustful lullabies as he could do nothing but whine for help.
“F-Fuck mommy, please don't focus on the tip s-so m-much.” He begged, shoving his head into your shoulder as you fondled faster, hearing his whines all in your ear.
“Awe, but baby you're enjoying this though. I bet if I keep going, keeping all my attention on your tip just like this might make you cum like a good boy huh?”
“Yeah?” He moaned, “You wanna make me cum Mommy?” He moaned again, tossing his head back as you compelled a kiss on his lips. Keeping a fast pace, his face was as red as a rose. Watching him catch his breath as he could feel his essence grow nearer, you could only imagine how hot he would sound when he cums. How could only a little tease from you, end up at this point? How was it that, you both went from sitting across each other with no communication to him begging, whining to cum for you? He wrapped his arm around your waist, signifying how close he seemed to be.
He exhaled deeply, “W-Why am I starting to feel it-”
Your eyes glistened, just hearing those words made you focus even more on his tip. Gradually edging him then giving him a ruined orgasm was your plan, like just imagine, his cum spewing all over your hands as he begged for more, whining to fuck your pretty body and treat you like the fucking slut you were…However, he grasped your hand and stroked it himself at a rapid pace.
“A-Arisu?” You questioned as he attained a kiss, feeling your body maneuver slowly closer to him.
“I-I don't wanna cum y-yet.” He stammered, quitting his strokes. It seemed to be all a blur because, you didn’t imagine yourself looking up at his pretty face while his dick stood tall in yours. You were stunned, feeling your body shiver and your cheeks flush up with warmth. Abruptly how close his dick was towards your lips, you didn’t even expect him to be big since he was skinny compared to you. Sweat was rushing down his face as he caught his breath, looking downward at you so innocently while you slowly grasped him, lips parting until he gently grasped your hair, pushing you closer to the tip.
“Is this what you want?” You spoke whilst subtly leaving kisses.
“Y-You don’t have to…” He stammered.
“You want me to though, you wouldn’t be holding my hair up like that unless you wanted me to-” You spoke, suckling gently.
You watched him struggle to pull the bottom hems of his shirt up, munching down vigorously as your hand trailed up his stomach.
“You’re gonna have to use your big boy words, tell me you want me to-” You teased, licking him as he groaned in his shirt.
“M-Make me cum in your mouth Mommy.“ He whined indistinctly, surveying you to consume him slowly as his eyes rolled back in pleasure. You sensed how hard he was inside your mouth, tasting his surging pre-cum as well as how nervous he seemed to be in this situation. His straining body, veiny hands tightening on the grip of your hair as you mouth fucked his dick sloppily, you knew for a fact he couldn’t think straight at all. You had made full eye contact with him, however, he couldn’t force himself to stop tossing his head backwards from all the pleasure you were tending him, it made you smile because you knew that if he were to keep his pretty eyes on you, this session would last for only a minute utmost.
“Look at me Arisu-“ You demanded, trailing your tongue on his shaft.
“I-I’m trying hani-" He whined, breathing heavily in between words.
“I'm sorry, I got carried away. I just want you to last a little longer okay?-“ You pleaded, suckling the tip again.
“You doing anything will make me cum quicker Mommy.” He whined, “B-But if you want me to last,” He indulged, positioning his hands on your jaw, signaling you to stand up, “Don't put all your attention on me please, I don't want you to sit there unsatisfied.”
“H-Huh?” You startled, feeling his hands grasp yours and then drag you to the rim.
“C-Can you sit on the rim for me?” He questioned, watching you sit for him.
“Arisu? What are you doing?” You questioned as he grasped your thighs gently, spreading them apart and pulling you close to his hips.
“I've never expected this to happen,” He uttered, grasping his dick and slowly entreating the lips of your pussy, “Watching you while you're in pleasure...I-It does something to me Y/N...”
“Arisu-” You moaned, locking your legs around him, “Tell me what you want- don't be nervous please.”
“Let me f-fuck you please, listening to your pretty moans knowing they're from me, watching your pretty face make those expressions that I-I-”
“Love? Then, don't tremble to puppy.” You uttered, feeling his free hand grasp the back of your neck, forcing your upper body closer to his, “I want all of you, give it to me…Ryohei.” You begged.
You watched him throw his head back. It was something that had set him off, your pretty voice begging for him to enter you and the way how you cried out his name. Regardless, you couldn't waste any time, feeling so needy that you penetrated yourself with him. Hearing him moan in unison with you as your eyes averted directly at each other. He whimpered, slowly thrusting himself. How sensitive he became inside your soaking pussy, gripping your neck tighter as you begged him to fuck you profoundly. He completely submitted to you. You couldn't focus on anything in this moment, not even his face, you tried to block out his moans but he pushed you further into a breaking point where you couldn't do anything but respond vigorously, surrounding your arm around his neck, bringing him closer into a sloppy kiss while singing in each other's mouths, increasing his pace inside you.
“S-So aggressive-” You panted, “Keep going my love.” You panted again as you brushed his damp hair away from his beautiful face, wanting to see him in action.
“I wanna see your pretty eyes while you fuck me like this.” You begged, biting your lip as he grasped your neck gently.
“Yeah-Keep talking like that Hani, I love it when you fucking tease me.” He whimpered, struggling to catching his breath, “M-Mommy s-stop squeezing me l-like that.” He whimpered once more, elongating a fuck from his mouth as you marked his neck.
“W-Why? Are you starting to feel it? I'm sorry it's not my fault your s-starting to make me--” You whined, sensing his twitching body strain from exhilaration.
He groaned, pulling you closer, almost picking you up off the rim. “Do it on me please, I want you to please Hani.”
He soon begged you to stretch out your legs for him, arranging his arms to your sides as he slowly thrusted deeper inside you. Watching his face strain with every stroke as you couldn't take the pressure, gradually playing your clit in front of him.
“Oh fuck- l-let me do it, let me do it for you Mommy please.” He begged, shoving your fingers away as his thumb was thrown on your clit, circling you in rhythm with his strokes.
“Ryohei--you're so desperate.” You moaned in anticipation, “S-Stop- I'm starting to feel it--” You stammered, however, he responded with a kiss.
“Do it all over me please hani, be comfortable with me please.” He huffed, pulling away but resting his forehead on yours while gazing into your eyes. “F-F-Fuck-” He exclaimed, “I'm starting to feel it too-”
“Keep going my love, drain yourself into me please, you're doing so good. I want you to give me all of you please puppy.” You begged, seizing your sporadic breaths out your mouth as his tongue instinctively entered.
“Y-You want me to c-cum inside you momma?” He pleaded, sensing an abrupt warmth about to surge out of him. “M-Mommy- I...I feel...it...Y/N.” He whimpered.
“Yeah? You feel it Ryohei?”
“Yeah- I-I feel it Mommy I feel it-”
“Then cum inside me Daddy, please.”
“Ohh fuck- M-Mommy I'm gonna cum I'm gonna-”
“Y/N...I...I love y-”
....
For a second, you thought you had seen things. (That's when you knew, he had fucked your brains out completely.) A beam of light had flickered on his face. As he kissed you again, you kept your eyes open, and that's when it happened again. To make sure you were correct, you turned around to see a flashlight in the far distance...
That's when you shoved him away from you.
What, the absolute, fuck...
“Who the hell is still out here?” A voice spoke, flashing his light on Arisu's face, he covered his eyes from the high beam while you quickly shoved his shaft back into his pants, fixing yourself up afterwards and pretending as if nothing happened. The guy soon flashed his light on you but you couldn't make out who it was until he laughed.
That's when you realized.....
“I would never expected a fuck fest to happen out here now.” The voice spoke, you quickly presided your eyes at Arisu, watching his eyes widen with shock.
“No...N-Niragi?” He stumbled.
Niragi soon made himself visible. He watched you both stand there like complete idiots while he obnoxiously laughed, “What could you both possibly be doing eh? You virgins need to go the fuck to--wait--” He hesitated, taking another look at you both once more.
“What?” You spoke, watching his jaw drop.
“No--No--NO--I CANT FUCKING BELIEVE IT-ARISU-YOU-FUCKED-HER?” He exclaimed as Arisu had glanced at you innocently, “NOW I DIDN'T KNOW YOU COULD HANDLE A WOMAN WITH CURVES.” Niragi exclaimed again.
“Cut the bullshit we weren't doing anything.” Arisu claimed, leading you out the hot tub.
You watched Niragi walk over, scanning you both down as he took a slight whiff, “Bullshit? Oh but I smell nothing but sweat and sex. It’s all over your faces.”
“Don’t go near her.” Arisu claimed, pulling you closer to him as Niragi looked downwards at you with a snarky grin.
“Y/N, tell me, how good was his fucking eh? I don’t know what you see in his loser ass, but I bet if I had my way with you, you wouldn't be standing here so pretty.” He commented, laughing as Arisu stood in front of you.
“She wouldn't go near you at all, what makes you think you can say that bullshit huh? We were just leaving.” Arisu snapped, grasping your hand generously.
“Arisu, oh Arisu, the only thing that was leaving was that cum you've been saving for how long now? Watch yourself, don't make it a habit of fucking in public, unless I'm in it.” He laughed, winking at you then soon after glaring down at Arisu.
“C’mon Arisu, lets go inside now.” You insisted, hauling him away from Niragi.
“Hmph, are you okay?” He questioned.
“Yeah I'm alright. I am so sorry for what I am about to say but--Niragi ate you up with that comeback.” You spoke, covering your mouth as his eyes averted to your face.
“WHAT?”
“I'm sorry!” you giggled, watching his serious face break down into a light grin.
“Because it's you, I'll let it pass. Your mean.” He uttered, lightly pushing you away before grasping you and pulling you in close, “He could've at least waited, I don't feel it anymore...”
“Oh? So what I'm hearing is, your desperate and you still wanna cum huh?”
“NO I-I”
“I'm playing! Sorta.” You giggled, watching his face fluster.
“H-How was I anyways, I feel like I didn't do good enough.” He doubted
“Oh puppy, you were spectacular. However, I still wanna finish you off.” You uttered.
“F-Finish me off?”
“You thought cumming inside me was gonna be it? Oh love, you will always remember how good we fucked, even when I'm not there, I want you to throb every time you think about it.....”
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vcutparis · 6 months ago
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i think i am Healed. i felt recognized here wow. warms hugs for u author! (spoilers in the tags)
subtle variations of heartbreak (index)
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Summary:  a series of stand alone one-shots depicting every kind of heartbreak you will undoubtedly experience in your 20s
Pairing: fem. reader x Ateez
Genre: college au, high school au, oh boy lovers to exes, unrequited love, friends with benefits, like a whole lotta angst read with caution, fluff, smut
Warnings: a LOT of insecurity talk, sexual content, cheating, trust issues, communication warnings idk i’ll add if theres anything else
A/N: this will be a short series, one chapter for each member. they can be read as stand-alones but they’re all tied together kinda. i’ll warn you right now i doubt you will like any of these characters because theyre all going to break your heart so… idk when i’ll post the first part, maybe tomorrow or later on in the week. 
if anyone would like to be added to the taglist just dm me :)
MY  MAIN MASTERLIST!
INDEX:
1. The First Love
drabbles: this is what i have to do
2. The Hookup Buddy
3. The Blind Sider
drabbles: (don’t wanna) be responsible
4. The Game Changer
drabbles: dream of her
5. The One That Got Away
drabbles: the winner takes it all
6. When You End It
drabbles: messy as you want
7. Friends Can Break Your heart Too
8. The Cheater
drabbles: no good
                part-time lovers
9. The One 
drabbles : (not) my baby
                 still into you
                 sleepover
#woosan my babes. oh i bawled SO BAD.#and yunho as the first love#U KNEW WHAT U WERE DOING!!!!!!#this was a journey and we bawled half the time but San MY GREEN FOREST MWAH#jin as a therapist turned friend JWHDFHG I BARKED#JUNGKOOK AS A SILLY FRIEND AWOOOOO#and mean seonghwa was trauma inducing sorry. I was gasping for air after that segment like.#i think i'll visit this series everytime i feel heartbroken bc wow u created a Fiction so angsty yet so accepting#AND THE LIFE GOES ON AT EVERY PART AND THE FULL NAME ASGSHHHH#AND IN WOOSAN'S PARTS ITS JUST PLAIN ACCEPTANCE AND JUST SO CHEFS KISS#choi jongho OH lord. wait till i catch You. his part stressed me out so bad i facepalmed so bad.#mingi's part had me so anxious and that drabble. Oh i was about to pull a maddy on him (?)#yeosang's part. the room mate thing he pulled and Not Know. BIG FUCKING L. like be serious. OH SORRY U CANT BE MY B#i could relate to hongjoong's part a lot because hahahahahahaha ... cbtm and that grocery meeting with mc MIND WENT WEE WOO STOP CRYING!!!#wooyoung. bro's a smash. Top Tier Bad Bitch.#sani my san-ah. get urself a choi san or no one else.#A cat's a better companion than a man who's not a choi san embodiment.#moral of the story : it passes#played entire namjoon discography and bruh when yn was getting a grip on her life with jin you're on ur own kid's last chorus played and#i had snot all over my face.#all the ateez member there but i literally sobbed with knees to my chest when mc got to know about her mother and mr jeong....#OH lord the way her mother helped her burn yunho's memories away WHEW. i love her the most.#future chika will remember u when they have good choice in Men.#if this doesnt tell u how much life altering this fic was for me then i think i should just kiss u and lay rose petals underneath ur feet.#namjoon loves you#chika whos going to be gwenchana.#im sorry i keep adding but when mc said she a scorpio BRO I SQUELED CUS BABY SAMEEEEEEEEEEE#ateez x reader
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minisugakoobies · 9 months ago
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Paradise | JJK - Fifteen
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Pairing: Jungkook x Reader
Genre: smut, neighbors to lovers (not quite friends but not quite strangers), slow burn, love triangle, Stripper!AU
Rating: M (18+)
Warnings: we finally get a JinKook showdown in the most ridiculous way possible, the tiniest bit of angst, CONFESSIONS!!, followed by post-confession sex, JK hits it raw, OC in lingerie, fingering, oral sex (f receiving), lots of talking about feelings, I'm sorry but this gets a little soft because I love these two
Word Count: 6.3k
Disclaimers: NSFW, obviously I don’t own BTS - they just inspire me
Summary: That sexy man on stage - the one currently giving your friend the lap dance of her LIFE - is your super shy neighbor, Jeon Jungkook?!
A/N: We're back and we're nearing the end! Thank you to everyone who has been waiting patiently for the next chapter - I didn't mean for it to take so long, but, well, life 🤷‍♀️ Anyway, I'm very excited to share this chapter with you finally - I hope you enjoy!
Unbeta’d as usual. Please don’t be a silent reader, I’d love to hear from you!  💕
Previous Chapter ♦️ Paradise Masterlist ♦️ Next Chapter
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Despite his words earlier, Jungkook is in fact one of the first people on the dance floor when it opens. And of course, you’re right there with him. How could you say no when he holds his hand out and smiles at you like that - like nothing else would make him happier right now than you in his arms?
After all the time you’ve spent admiring Jungkook’s moves when he dances for you, it’s a whole new perspective to get to experience them when you’re dancing with him. Part of that difference is due to the deejay keeping it wholesome with the song selections, since Jennie and Yoongi’s family members are the majority of the revelers surrounding you. So there’s a lot less grinding and a lot more distance between the two of you.
You don’t really try to keep up with him - it’s not that you’re a terrible dancer, it’s just that he’s so fucking good. His every movement is so natural, like he’s not even trying. He does show off just a little bit, when Jisoo eggs him on, slipping into a freakishly accurate robot that has a small ring of guests gathering around to cheer him on. The giant grin on his face tells you he’s enjoying the attention just as much as the faint blush on the tips of his ears tells you he’s just a little bashful about it. 
After a few songs, the music finally slows a little, the crowd thinning as only couples are left. Jungkook draws you close, one arm sliding around your back as the other clasps your hand, holding it to his chest. The room around you falls away as he takes the lead, swaying with you around the floor.
“Are you having a good time, jagi?” he murmurs after a moment. 
“I am, Kookie.” Lifting your head from his shoulder, you gaze into his eyes, feeling that familiar warmth overtake you when he returns your smile. “Thanks for coming with me today.”
“Like I’d turn down the chance for free food and drinks,” he teases, laughing when you huff and try to pull away, tightening his grip to keep you locked in place. “What? I’m just being honest.” 
“Ass,” you mutter, but you can’t stop smiling, and neither can he. He lifts his arm, hand pressing lightly on your back to guide you in a spin, then brings you back into his embrace. You spot Rosé across the room, watching you and Jungkook dance, and she politely claps as you shake your head, grinning. 
The beat picks up again, and your friends surround you and Jungkook. Rosé, Jisoo, and Jin all dance together as Lisa introduces Yi-Jeong to the group. Even Jennie and Yoongi join in, and it’s true what Jennie told you yesterday - her man definitely has moves. Everyone’s happy and laughing, and you’re so full of joy you could just burst.
Jin suddenly twirls, facing Jungkook with an intense look on his face. The younger man takes a step back in surprise as Jin starts to rock his body back and forth, like he’s about to bust out a breakdance move. Is he seriously about to - 
“Ooh, dance battle!” Jisoo cups her hands around her mouth, yelling. Your other friends start whooping, forming a circle around Jungkook and Jin. Jisoo pulls you next to her from where you’ve been standing, so you’re not between them anymore. “Get it, Bambi!” 
While the others around you are shouting encouragement, you just gaze silently between the two men, unsure if you should be joining in. Unsure if this is a friendly competition or if the tense vibes you feel radiating between them is something more. From the expressions on their faces, it’s clear that they’re going to do this, so you just sigh, bobbing along to the beat, waiting for the show. 
Jungkook stops gawking at Jin and begins bedrocking, swinging his hands as he faces Jin with a fierce look. Jin glares back, sticking his arms out as he undulates in a rather impressive wave, rolling his long limbs from left to right. 
It’s not until you hear clapping behind you that you realize that more people have joined the circle, crowding in behind you, shouting Jin’s name. Jungkook hears it too, his brow furrowing slightly. It’s clear his competitive nature’s kicked in when he peels his suit jacket off. You hold your hand out for it automatically, feeling a swoop of heat in your stomach as he gives it to you with a wink. 
The tip of his tongue slips out as Jungkook suddenly throws himself towards the ground, landing on one hand like he’s doing a handstand, and then kicks his legs out in a cartwheel kick. He’s so smooth with it, inverting himself like it’s nothing, that you actually gasp.
It’s like he cranked the volume up on the crowd, and someone - Rosé, maybe? - starts chanting Jungkook’s name. You can’t help but add your voice to the mix. 
Jungkook lands back on his feet and motions for Jin to go. Jin also takes his jacket off, jaw clenching firmly. He rolls his body a few times before bouncing into the Roger Rabbit, feet stepping quickly, arms flapping at his side like wings. It’s surprisingly loose and funky, two words you don’t typically associate with Jin. 
Lisa yells, “Go chef!” and the crowd divides itself into two chants. Jin ends his turn with a little flourish, dusting imaginary dirt from his broad shoulders. But you know from Jungkook’s smirk that he’s undaunted, and without a second’s hesitation, he swiftly dives to the floor, launching himself into a windmill.
Your friends explode into cheers, watching Jungkook roll round and round the floor. As he picks up speed, he tucks his arms up onto his stomach, doing the trick with no hands. Then he comes to a stop with a freeze, legs hanging in the air. 
The crowd chants Jungkook’s name only as he rises to his feet. He straightens his tie, then gestures to Jin. Jin rocks for a few beats, a strange look in his eye. 
Then he throws his hands out in front of him, holding one steady while the other mimics winding a reel. 
“Is he - is he fishing for Jungkook?” 
You don’t answer Rosé as there’s no need to. Jin’s clearly doing the fishing pole move. One by one, the voices around you grow quieter. Jungkook blinks at Jin for a few seconds, obviously thrown by this decision.
Then he grins, flapping his hands by his face like fins.
“Oh, wow, they share a brain cell,” Lisa says. “Did not see that coming.” 
Jisoo groans. “Well, this is anticlimactic. I was promised bloodshed.” 
“Who promised you that?” you ask, laughing. Feeling a tiny bit relieved. 
The crowd departs, but the two men keep dancing. Jungkook pretends he’s been hooked, thrashing from side-to-side before dropping to the ground in his signature dolphin kick. Always a performer to the end, you think, as he hops back to his feet, and he and Jin take turns bowing to one another. 
The smile on his face gets wider when Jungkook sees you clapping for him. He reaches for his jacket, and you impulsively press a kiss to his cheek, biting back a laugh as his eyes widen slightly.
“If those are the moves you pull out for a dance-off, I can’t wait to see what you’ve got planned for later,” you whisper. Jungkook’s arm grips your side as he tilts his head to look at you. His touch is warm, but it can’t match the heat in his eyes. 
“Careful what you ask for, jagiya,” he replies, gaze dropping to your mouth so briefly that you almost miss it. “I need some water. Do you want anything?” 
You shake your head, and he disappears towards the tables. As soon as he’s gone, you feel someone brush your arm. 
“Okay, I’ll give it to the kid - he’s got moves,” Jin declares, holding his hand out in an offer to dance. You silently take it, letting him pull you close as the deejay cues up a ballad. 
Jin’s quiet for a few beats, leading you in small circles around the dance floor. It strikes you that this is the first time the two of you have really been face-to-face since yesterday, that weird standoff in the hallway earlier notwithstanding. You haven’t had a chance to talk to him alone since - 
“So what’s up with your boy?” 
You meet Jin’s gaze with a raised eyebrow. “Jungkook? What do you mean?”
Jin shrugs, the movement jostling your hand where it rests on his shoulder. “I mean, he looked like he was ready to throw hands when he introduced himself earlier. Like he was just itching for a fight.” 
“And you’re not?” You snort when he blinks in exaggerated confusion. “Oh, come on, all those snide little comments you were making at the table? Arguing with him about who has it worse? What was that all about?” 
Jin maintains his affronted expression for half a minute longer before he starts to laugh. “Okay, fine, I admit I was just pushing his buttons at dinner. In my defense, he made it too easy!” He laughs harder when you roll your eyes and start to pull away. “Okay, okay, I’m sorry. But I had to do something to cheer myself up. It wasn’t easy for me to sit there and watch the two of you together, to see the way you look at him.” 
Your curiosity tampers down your annoyance for a moment. “How do I look at him?” 
Jin smiles, but it doesn’t reach his eyes. “Like there’s no one else in the world.” 
You glance away, unsure what to say to that. Your gaze flits around the room until it lands on Jungkook, finding him at one of the tables, chatting with Lisa and Yi-jeong. His nose crinkles as he laughs with your friend, tattooed hand coming up to swipe away the hair that falls into his face, and you hear Jin sigh. 
“Yeah, that’s the look,” he says, shaking his head. He shifts his arm from your back, leading you into a gentle spin. “I was honestly surprised at how easy it was to antagonize him. Figured nothing I could do or say would bother him, knowing he won your heart.”
When you don’t respond to that, staring at Jin’s bowtie instead of meeting his eye, he hums. 
“Oh, I see. You haven’t told him yet.” 
Without warning, Jin dips you. You gasp, clutching his bicep to steady yourself.
“Are you having second thoughts?” he murmurs. His hand grips yours tightly, arm cradles your back, keeping you in place while his face hovers a mere breath above yours. 
It’s an intimate pose, the way he holds you now, yet just like yesterday, you feel nothing.
“No. No second thoughts.” You’ve recovered from your momentary shock, voice steady as you reply. “I’m sorry, Jin, but like I told you yesterday, it’s Jungkook I want.” 
Immediately, you’re back on your feet. 
“Yeah, I didn’t think so.” Jin grins a crooked grin. “Had to ask, though.” 
You roll your eyes. “I’m starting to regret this whole ‘let’s be friends’ idea.” 
He ignores your jibe. “Can I ask you a serious question?” 
You take a moment to study his face before answering. All traces of humor have vanished as he waits for your response. Slowly, you nod. 
“What are you waiting for?” 
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The rooftop garden glows softly in the night air, lit by tiny lights strung along the trees and flowering plants. Hidden speakers strewn around the open space bring the music from the reception outside, providing a gentle soundtrack for a beautiful summer evening. 
“Where are we going?” Jungkook asks, hand clasped firmly in yours as you lead him out of the reception and across the garden. 
In the corner of the roof, there’s a small nook carved out between two potted cherry blossoms, their branches obscuring the two of you from any of the other guests milling about. Right now, you need a little privacy.
You also need a moment to gather your thoughts. Your stomach’s jumped into your throat at the thought of what you’re about to do, and your anxiousness makes it hard to think straight. It doesn’t help that you’re slightly distracted by the sight in front of you. 
Although the sun’s long since set, the air is still warm. Jungkook’s shed his jacket, has his tie loosened, sleeves rolled to his elbows, hand still in yours as he looks at you expectantly, patiently waiting for you to speak. You can see the moon reflecting in his bright eyes, and for a moment, you’re back in the elevator at your apartment, staring at your handsome neighbor, that shy man with the sweet smile.
It wasn’t that long ago that he was a total stranger. Someone you saw occasionally at the mailboxes, someone who regularly ran away when you tried to talk to him. You didn’t know anything about him back then - what he did, what he liked, what made him laugh. What his kisses felt like. 
It wasn’t that long ago, yet it already feels like a distant memory. One that you never want to return to. Knowing everything you know about him now, feeling everything you feel - you can’t go back. There’s only one thing you need to do now - tell him. 
No reason to wait a second longer. 
Taking a deep breath, you squeeze his hand. “Jungkook, I brought you out here because I wanted to tell you something. I’m… ah, I’m not very good at this kind of thing, but I’m gonna try because I don’t want to drag this out when I don’t need to.” 
Jungkook’s eyebrows twitch slightly, but he doesn’t say anything, so you go on. 
“You know how I went to Jennie’s yesterday? Um, Jin was also there, with Yoongi. He pulled me aside and told me that the job Wendy asked me to interview for is actually his show for Nosh. And then he started talking about the two of us working together and traveling and -”
“Choose me, jagiya.” 
“Huh?” 
His interruption throws you off from the rambly mess you were attempting to say. Jungkook reaches for your other hand, holding both against his chest, and gives you a shaky smile. 
“Choose me, jagi. I know I don’t have a career like Seokjin does, or his money, or - or even a guarantee that I’ll ever have either of those things. I probably can’t promise you most of the things he can.” He pauses to draw a long breath, like he’s trying to slow himself down and not rush over his words, and oh, you want to kiss him so much right now. Even if this isn’t how it’s supposed to go. “But I can promise y-”
“No no!” It’s his turn to look surprised as you raise your hands to his mouth, muffling his speech. “Jungkook, stop! I was trying to tell you that I ended things with Jin yesterday. You don’t have to say another word because it’s over.” 
“Mmt’s omer?” he mumbles against your fingers, eyes widening. 
“Yes, it’s over,” you giggle, uncovering his mouth, and suddenly all of your nervousness floats away on the evening breeze. “Come on, Kookie. Don’t you know? I’ve already chosen. It’s you. It’s always been you.” 
Jungkook continues to stare at you with those big doe eyes as your words slowly sink in, and you can’t help but smile, fondly, so, so fondly, that familiar sensation of warmth surging up from your chest, and you know now that it has a name, that buzz, that elation, that euphoria, and it’s on the tip of your tongue, just waiting for you to breathe it to life. 
So you exhale. 
“I think I’m falling in love with you.” 
For just the slightest of moments - a fraction of a second, a single heartbeat - when he doesn’t do anything, doesn’t so much as blink or breathe, you’re scared you’ve said too much. It’s too soon, too fast, too everything. 
But then he wraps his arms around you, holding you close enough that you can feel his own heart thumping wildly within his chest, and puts your fears to rest with four simple words, whispered softly against your lips.  
“Jagi, I’ve already fallen.” 
He kisses you, soft and slow, every touch so full of tenderness that you could cry. You tangle your fingers in his hair, desperately seeking something to hold onto, to keep you from floating right off the roof. He’s fallen for you. Jungkook’s fallen for you. 
You never knew your heart could hold so much. 
All your nervousness from before has dissipated. Now the only reason your pulse races is the nearness of him.
“Are you in any hurry to get back in there?” he asks, tipping his head towards the party.
You shake your head. 
He smiles. “Good.” 
He takes your hand again, locking his other arm around your back. You lay your head on his shoulder and close your eyes, listening to him sing along lightly with the music drifting across the rooftop. Even when the song changes to something more uptempo, he doesn’t let go, just laces his fingers through yours and continues to sway with you beneath the stars. 
Many songs later, when the two of you finally return to the party, you find that it’s already winding down. Jennie and Yoongi are making their rounds to say goodbye, needing to go home  and pack for their trip to Jeju Island in the morning. 
Jennie grabs your arm and pulls you away from Jungkook, waving the other bridesmaids over. “I’m gonna do it tonight!” 
Jisoo pinches her cheek. “Babe, you’ve already done it. That’s why you’re late, remember?” 
“Ha, ha.” Jennie smacks her hand away. “I mean I’m gonna tell Yoongi I’m pregnant, smartass.” 
“Ah, I’m so excited for you!” Lisa gives her a hug, and then you’re all hugging. 
“Have you all had a good time tonight?” Jennie asks, not waiting for an answer. “This has been the most amazing day! Thank you for everything, I couldn’t have done this without you.” 
“Yes, you could have,” you grin. 
“Okay, true, I could have. But it wouldn’t have been as much fun without you all. I love you so much!” 
“We love you too. Now go celebrate with your husband!” Rosé giggles, emphasizing the last word with an energetic wiggle of her eyebrows. 
“Yeah, get out of here. Some of us have plans tonight but we can’t leave until you do.” Jisoo declares. 
“She makes a good point,” Lisa chimes in, glancing over her shoulder at where Yi-jeong sits alone, clearly waiting. 
“Wow, okay,” Jennie laughs, but she’s flying too high to really be mad. “I’ll see you all in a week!” 
It’s as you turn to walk back to Jungkook that you remember. 
“Oh! Lisa!” 
Your friend glances at you as you back away with a giant grin. 
“Pay Rosé her fifty bucks.” 
“Why are your friends screaming like that?” Jungkook asks when you rejoin him. 
You just smile and press a soft kiss to his cheek. “Ready to get out of here?” 
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Riding Jungkook’s motorcycle is a much more pleasant experience tonight than it was on your way home from your first date. The sky is clear above you as Jungkook expertly weaves through traffic, and you’re warm and dry sitting behind him, wearing his suit jacket, arms tight around his waist. You spend most of the ride hugging more than holding on to him. 
Every few blocks, he releases the hand grip to let his palm rest on your thigh for a moment, squeezing gently. You think he means it as a reassuring touch, knowing how shaky you are with the entire concept of motorcycles to begin with, how just the thought of riding one still makes you nervous, but the actual effect he's having on you is far from comforting. It’s driving you insane.
By the time you reach your apartment door, you’re feral with need. You toss Jungkook’s jacket onto the floor and Jungkook lets out a surprised yelp when you tug on his arm as he’s closing the door. He barely has a chance to turn the lock before you’re pulling him down, passionately kissing away his confused noise. 
“B-baby,” he finally manages to stammer out after a few minutes of intense making out, “baby, do you wanna move to the couch?” 
You shake your head. “Need you now.” 
“Yeah?” His eyes are so dark that it makes you shudder when he catches your gaze. “Always so needy for me, huh? Just like the first time?” 
You remember that night, the way he’d fucked you against the hallway wall, both of you too desperate to even make it another ten feet to your bed. That same greedy desire burns through you now. 
Thank god for the slit in your dress. Hitching your leg up, you wrap it around his back, guiding him back down on top of you. 
“Just like that,” your voice trembles, back arching as Junghook’s hand snakes between you, rubbing at you through your dress. “Ahh, fuck, just like that!” 
You grasp at the side zipper on the dress, fingers fumbling too much to yank it down as quickly as you want. Jungkook has to do it for you, helping you sit up long enough to shed the entire gown. 
He sucks in a sharp breath. “Jagi.” 
If you weren’t already dying for him, the expression on his face when he sees you in the lingerie you’re wearing beneath your dress would do it. 
“Does it look better in person?” you ask, running your fingers over your chest, thumbs pressing in slow circles to wake your nipples, feeling them swell beneath the lace. 
With a pained groan, Jungkook starts hurriedly tearing at his suit, throwing the items nearly halfway across the open space of your living room in his urgency, not stopping until he’s completely naked, cock already hardening between his legs. 
“Yeah,” he grunts, biting his lip to let his hands do the talking. They travel over your torso, up across your breasts, squeezing your hands so you grip yourself harder. He laughs at your little gasp, and then he’s swallowing your sounds with his eager mouth, knocking your legs apart with his knee so he can press his body to yours. 
Your own impatience has you hooking your calves the backs of his thighs, bending your knees to urge him nearer. But no matter how close he is to you, it’s not enough, an itch you can’t scratch no matter how much you try. 
“I think this is going to have to come off now,” you frown, tugging at your bodice. You need to feel him, skin-to-skin. 
“Oh, not yet,” Jungkook says, voice near enough to be a growl. “Please, jagi, keep it on a little longer. For me.” He looks at you with such a lustful gaze that you find yourself nodding, immediately caving to his wish. If he wants to fuck you in your lingerie, fine. There will be more time to feel him later. 
There will be more time for everything you want with Jungkook. 
His mouth reconnects with yours. You sigh into him as his fingers find the snaps at the crotch of the teddy. He’s not gentle with them, practically ripping them open, but he’s more delicate as he slides his finger into you, finding you just as wet as always. He plunges two fingers in, and you know he’s trying to take his time and make sure you’re ready, but you’re too impatient for his consideration right now. 
“Come on, Kookie,” you plead, cupping his chin to draw his gaze away from his work, “I’m ready. I need you now.” 
“Shit,” he mutters, clearly reading your frustration. “Are you sure?”
“Yeah. I wanna feel you.” 
He reaches for his pants, which have been flung over the back of the couch, and you stop him.
“No, I mean, I want to feel you.”
Jungkook swallows hard, his Adam’s apple visibly bobbing. “Jesus Christ, jagiya, you’re going to kill me.” He kisses you again, before his expression turns serious. “Can we? I mean, are you on something -” 
Laughing, you grab his face again, pulling him back to you for another kiss. 
“I have an implant. And I haven’t been with anyone since you and I have been…” you trail off, unsure what to call it. Dating? “Not since the last time I was tested.” 
“No one?” He doesn’t say the name, but you know what he’s asking. 
“No one.” You and Seokjin never got that far.
“I haven’t been with anyone either.” Jungkook strokes his thumb along your cheek. “It’s just been you. You’re the only one I want.” 
“Then have me.” With another sigh, you lift your hips, rolling against him. 
Jungkook groans, and you barely have a second to breathe before his lips take yours again. There’s some shifting, you spreading your legs while he’s propping himself up on one elbow and lining himself up with his other hand, and then he’s sinking in, slowly, filling you up hot inch by hot inch, until he’s completely sheathed. 
You got your wish. You can feel all of him. It’s a new sensation, and it’s intense, but you can tell it’s even more so for him. 
“Oh, goddamn, jagi.” Jungkook presses his forehead to yours. His chest heaves as he holds himself completely still. “You’re so - fuck.” 
“Yeah? Is it that good?” 
He nods a little, eyes squeezing shut, and you run your fingers through his hair, trying to impart some comfort. As much as you want him to rail you through the floor right now, you don’t want to rush him anymore. 
“Does it really feel that different?”
Jungkook shakes his head. “It’s not that. That’s part of it - you feel so fucking good, baby - but it’s - it’s…” He huffs out a short breath, shaking his head again. “I don’t know how to say it. It’s everything.” 
And you understand exactly what he means, not by whatever he’s trying and failing to say, but by the look in his eyes. 
“Oh,” is all you can say, feeling your own words slipping away from you, as he starts to move. 
His cock drags slowly, so slowly at first, his head bowing as he concentrates on the feeling of you, the way your cunt seems to suck him back in eagerly, walls clenching when he snaps his hips experimentally. He observes every breath that escapes you, every mewl and whimper, and adjusts his pace, the strength of his thrusts, all the while drowning in his own perception, the tight heat and wetness of your core making his eyes roll back in his head with each pump. 
Neither of you speak after that, but you don’t need to. Your bodies communicate everything you’re feeling, punctuated by the unrestrained noises you both make. Your nails rake down Jungkook’s back as he fucks into you, drawing whine after whine from him, broken cries of desire, of wanting you to hold him, claim him, just as he’s claiming you. Mine, your fingernails declare, inscribing his skin with scratches. Yours, his hips answer in return, powerfully driving into yours, connecting you again and again, faster and faster. 
His hand clutches at the thigh you’ve wrapped around his waist, fingers twisting around the garter straps, and you can tell from his unsteady panting that he’s close. Your own pleasure is nearing the precipice, but you know he’s going to reach his first. Which he confirms with a strangled whimper.
“Jagi, I’m - I’m gonna come,” he grits through his teeth, brow furrowed, like he’s focusing all his energy on not coming right then and there. “‘M sorry, I can’t stop, I can’t - “
“Don’t stop, Kookie, don’t stop!” You don’t care if he finishes first. This isn’t about just sex anymore. All you want is for him to feel as good as he makes you feel, all the time. “Come on, cum inside me. Give me everything, fill me up!” 
“Fuck!” he grunts, moaning your name, and with only a few more thrusts, he follows your command. His hips jerk wildly as he gives in to the burning need beneath his skin and fills you with his hot release. It seems to go on and on, until he’s gasping, sagging against you weakly, too wrung out to hold himself up any longer. “Holy shit.”
You just hum, stroking his sweat-soaked hair, until he finally lifts his head. 
“I’m sorry,” he says. “I got caught up in the moment. Too much going on in my head and - and, fuck, you felt too good.” He gives you a sheepish smile.
You shush his apologies with a laugh, wrapping your arms around him again, urging him to lay down, so his head rests on your chest. “You don’t have to explain. It’s been… it’s been a long time since I’ve felt anything like this.” 
He sighs, moving slightly so he can leave light kisses over your covered chest. “Me too.” His hand trails lazily down your torso, following the swirls in the lace’s pattern. “I’m glad you said what you did. On the roof. I wanted to tell you before how I felt, but I was afraid you’d think I was rushing things.” His voice gets quieter. “It wouldn’t be the first time.” 
There’s a sadness in his tone, a naked vulnerability that makes your heart ache, so you squeeze him a little tighter. You know exactly what he means. 
He raises his head a little, starts kissing his way down your stomach. “Are you still…”
“Am I still what?” You bite your lip as he reaches the apex of your thighs, gently nudging them further apart so he can lie in between. 
Jungkook presses soft kisses to your inner thighs, one side, then the other, before he looks up at you. “Was that enough for you or are you still wanting more? You were so needy earlier, jagiya.” 
Of course you still want more. You don’t think you’ll ever get enough of him. 
“Yeah,” you say, your fingers combing his hair out of his face so there’s nothing hiding him from you, just as there’s nothing hiding you from him, “I want more. Please, Kookie.” 
The smirk that spreads across his lovestruck face sends your heart racing. Your back arches off the floor when he coaxes the first orgasm from you with his tongue, feels like it might snap in half by the time he pulls the second one with his fingers. 
You melt into his embrace afterward, so thoroughly satiated, so utterly content, that you nearly fall asleep. But Jungkook coaxes you off the floor and into the bathroom, to wash his back in the shower before he tenderly scrubs yours, and then into bed, where the last thing you see before closing your eyes is the smile on his face as he whispers good night. 
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“What does this one mean?” 
It’s late. Very late, sometime between midnight and early morning, when you should be asleep. You’d awoken in need of some water, slipping out carefully, trying not to wake Jungkook, only to come back to find him up and waiting for you to return to bed. He wasn’t just awake but up up, and you couldn’t resist, climbing directly into his lap for a slow, lazy ride. 
Now, you’re lying together, back pressed to Jungkook’s chest, with his arm draped beneath your breasts, as he gives you a tour of his tattoos. He tells you that most are symbolic, but a few have stories behind them, and you listen raptly to each one. Even though he’s probably tired, he’s indulging you, answering all your questions without so much as a single yawn.
He tilts his head to look at where you’re tapping on a striped snake. “That one? That’s supposed to represent growth. You know, shedding my skin, like a snake.” He flexes his forearm and the snake moves as if undulating on its own. “Do you like snakes?” 
“I like them a lot more than spiders, I can tell you that,” you reply, giggling. 
He laughs, watching silently as your fingers roam over his skin. There’s so much ink covering him, and you’re dying to know about all of it, filled with a buzzing curiosity despite the late hour. 
“What about this one?” Gingerly, you trace over the orange tiger lily etched onto the inside of his forearm, as if afraid that pressing too harshly will cause the petals to crumple. It’s gorgeously vibrant, the glowing color popping vividly against his skin. 
“Ah, that’s my birth flower.” Jungkook laughs a quick laugh. “That one was actually Taehyung’s suggestion. Do you know what the flower is supposed to represent?” 
“Uh-uh.” 
“Self-confidence.” He laughs again, shaking you a little as his chest vibrates. “He said it’d be a good reminder when he’s not around, that I still need to be confident.”
“Taehyung’s a good friend,” you remark, and Jungkook hums in assent. He rubs mindlessly at the flower with his other hand, fingertips bumping against yours. 
“You know, there’s another reason I got this one. A hidden meaning that tiger lilies are meant to express.” 
“Ooh, a hidden meaning?” You tilt your head to peer at him. “And what’s that?” 
Even in the dim light from your bedside lamp, you can see the tips of Jungkook’s ears turning red as he smiles bashfully, his eyes crinkling when he answers. “Please love me.” 
It’s impossible to resist kissing him, kissing that shy bunny smile that you’ve adored all this time, so you don’t even try, cupping his cheeks gently while you brush his lips with yours. When you pull away, his face is flushed, and he laughs, dipping his head in embarrassment even as he whispers, “Keep going.” 
You giggle, and kiss him again, and then stop. “Oh! Wait a minute.” 
Jungkook lets out a small grunt of displeasure when you leave his embrace, but you return quickly, handing him a small frame from your desk. 
“Jagi, you framed this?” He stares through the glass at the tiger lily sketch he’d drawn for you, back when he asked you out on your first date.
“Well, yeah. It was too pretty not to.” 
You take your place between his legs again, his arm automatically sliding around your waist while he gazes at the picture. “But it was just a quick little drawing. It’s not my best work.” 
“So? I think it’s beautiful. And… it’s from you.” You can feel your neck warming as you speak. “I like to keep it on my desk when I’m working. Every time I get annoyed by something, I look at it, and it calms me down.” Your lips quirk in a little smile. “So you can imagine that I look at it a lot,” you say, half-joking, half-not. Because it’s true, you do stare at it a lot. The drawing always brings you peace. Because it reminds you of Jungkook. So fiery and bright, but also so lovely and delicate. 
“Jagi,” Jungkook says again, swallowing thickly. His arm squeezes you closer.
You take the frame from his hand, placing it on the nightstand, before shifting to face him, legs straddling his as you loop your arms around his neck. “Be honest - were you sending me a hidden message with this?” 
His ears are burning red again. “Maybe. Guess it worked.” 
You surge forward, kissing the cheeky smile right off his face. His hands settle on your hips, holding you tightly, as if right now there’s any danger of you leaving. There’s nowhere else you’d rather be, with no one else. 
But you’re also wondering something you’ve been wondering for a while now, and since he’s been so obliging so far, you decide to ask him one more question. “Can I ask you something?”
“Jagi, all you’ve been doing is asking me questions,” Jungkook grins. 
You roll your eyes at his teasing tone. “Yeah, okay, I just mean, can I ask about something that doesn’t have anything to do with your tattoos?” 
He nods. 
“If I hadn’t come to Paradise with my friends that night, would you ever have made a move?”
He clearly wasn’t expecting that question, judging by the look on his face. His eyes fall out of focus as they stare unseeing at you, and you know he’s lost in thought. You give him the time to find his way to an answer, running your fingers through his hair soothingly while you wait.
“I don’t know,” he finally admits. “I’d like to think that yes, I would’ve gotten up the nerve to talk to you. But it might’ve taken a while. Seeing you at Paradise kind of gave me an opening.”
“I think this still would’ve happened,” you tell him, suddenly filled with an unusual amount of confidence, bolstered by his hands on your waist, his eyes locked on yours, “all of this. I think we would’ve ended up just like this.” 
“How do you know that?”
“I would’ve worn you down at the mailboxes,” you grin. “At the rate we were going, it probably would’ve taken a decade, but we’d get there eventually.” 
He laughs, hands locking behind your back as he holds you close. “Or maybe I would’ve shown up at your door one night and danced for you. Maybe that’s what I did in another universe.” 
“I’m sure it worked,” you murmur, leaning closer to his lips. “I think in any universe, we end up like this. We’re just lucky that we got here so fast.” 
“The luckiest,” he agrees, closing the space between you. 
When you finally fall asleep again, you dream of falling through other universes, following the same dark eyes and wicked smirk through each.
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© 2021-22-23-24 by sunshinerainbowsbts/minisugakoobies. Crossposted to AO3. Please do not copy or repost.
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stray-kaz · 9 months ago
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Breathing : a Jeong Jin-man x f!reader oneshot
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Summary: He's alive, and you can breathe again.
A/N: Yikes, I wrote this in under an hour.
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The land lay quiet, the house in the midst a clatter of rubble and smoke. The guns were laid down, the knives bloodied and still. Pasin and Min-hye were nowhere in sight, and Ji-an was blood spattered and shellshocked. You weren't a lot better off.
You perched unevenly on what remained of Jin-man's carefully crafted wall, a crow with a damaged wing. Your left arm hung awkwardly in a makeshift sling, dried blood caking your skin where the bullets had grazed you.
You had possessed no earthly idea that this was what Jeong Jin-man was. Months ago, he had seemed quiet, a little morose, unnervingly funny, deep in the trenches of loving a girl. And then there was you.
And now, he was this. Or, he had been.
You pulled Ji-an down to sit next to you on the wall, and she quietly leaned her head on your shoulder.
"The cleaners will deal with the mess" she murmured.
An unsettled, strangled scoff fought its way out of your throat. The mess. The multitudinous dead bodies.
She put a hand on your knee and patted it awkwardly.
"Boys are dumb" you said suddenly. "There'll be others, Ji-an. Good ones."
She glanced at you.
"Are you talking to me right now, or yourself?" she asked. "I know that you lo -"
You interrupted quickly.
"He is good" you said, swallowing with difficulty; your throat couldn't seem to work properly, your lungs struggling for air. "He...was good, Ji-an."
She cleared her throat and settled back on your shoulder, but she was on her feet the split second she glimpsed the taxi coming. She moved to stand with the bus driver and his cleaners, and you glimpsed the butt of his gun.
You sighed. More?
You didn't move off the wall, too tired, too sore, too over it to care now.
The taxi stopped in a cloud of dust and the driver stepped out, accompanied by his front seat passenger. You blinked hard, shaking your head; was there someone in the back? You closed your eyes and when you opened them again, the taller man was opening the taxi's rear door and reaching in to help someone out.
You heard a soft intake of breath, and realised it was yours. The tension eased in your lungs and you pushed clumsily to your feet, one winged, and took a step away from the remains of that crumbling wall.
Jin-man.
You felt Ji-an's hand brush yours as you passed her, caught a half glimpse of the smile on her face. If you could have run, you would have, but your feet could only manage a slow, one step at a time kind of pace. However, from the look on his face, it didn't matter. One step at a time was just fine.
Jin-man couldn't hold you, but he held out a hand to grab yours, grasping it with the same strength he'd always used. You couldn't wipe away the tears clearing tracks through the dirt and gunpowder residue on your face with his hand gripping yours, but you leaned your cheek against his shoulder and that was better.
"You're alive" you whispered, as if the wind could snatch the truth away if you spoke it too loud.
He looked down at your injured arm, your torn shirt used for the sling.
"I'm sorry" he said, his voice low and gravelly.
You shook your head, your hair brushing the underside of his jaw. You squeezed his hand.
"You're alive" you repeated.
So I can breathe again.
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Tagging: @writingmysanity
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whimsimille · 6 months ago
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THICKER THAN BLOOD
Chapter 2: "Come home to me, darling."
(Jeong Jin-Man x fem! reader)
"Why are you leaving so suddenly?" You questioned, your voice bouncing off the tapestry that adorned the living room wall of your quaint shared apartment and the oak bookshelves filled with classics.
The comforting aroma of a simmering homemade tomato sauce filled the air, mingling with the sound of sizzling pans and the rhythmic chopping of crisp, fresh vegetables on the polished granite kitchen countertop. 
Dressed in a worn-out apricot apron adorned with faded sunflower prints, your hands were occupied with diligently kneading the carefully prepared pasta dough for your dinner, a recipe passed down from your Italian grandmother.
All of a sudden, the living room's normal sounds—the soft purr of Gunpowder, his gray cat curled up on the plush Persian rug, the low drone of the television playing the evening news—were replaced by an eerie silence that made your skin crawl. 
On turning, you noticed Honda in the midst of rushing preparations for departure. He was hunched over the suede couch, lacing up his sturdy boots, his face etched with stern concentration. Against the dimly lit backdrop of the room, his figure blended seamlessly, rendering him no more than a transient silhouette.
"Where exactly are you off to? And what's the urgency?" You signed, your hands dancing in the air while you leaned against the wooden door frame. A knot of unease formed in the pit of your stomach at the sight of his hasty departure.
His gaze met yours, a small, reassuring smile playing on his lips as he signed back, "I have to go. Jin-Man needs me. I can't disclose more for your safety. You know how it works."   
He continued to pack his bag—a small duffel made of worn leather with patches on the corners and straps slung over one shoulder. As he did so, you caught sight of an old photograph falling out of the side pocket; it was of you both from what looked like a summer festival years ago, grinning widely under colorful umbrellas while balloons swelled around you both.
"But can't it wait until tomorrow? Is it really necessary to depart on the day that we get back together after several months?
The worn-out leather of the couch groaned under his weight as he rose, his tall figure casting a long shadow against the faded brown wallpaper. 
Moving towards you, he avoided the cluttered coffee table littered with dog-eared magazines and discarded newspapers. His leather jacket, draped over the back of a nearby armchair, was quickly pulled on, the rusted zipper scraping against the silence of the room.
"No, it can't wait. But I'll be back in time for dinner. I promise." Even as he used a gentle swipe of his thumb to remove a stray splotch of tomato sauce from your cheek, his smile never left his face. “When I return, we can lounge on the couch, munching on popcorn and be engrossed in those old Hollywood classics you're so fond of. You can also show me your progress with that hacking project you've been working on. Maybe try not to fry the motherboard this time?"
"First of all, you better keep that promise. Second,  I’ll hold you to it. Third, for your information, that was a one-time thing!"
"First, I will. It's a promise. And second, I remember it being a three-time thing." He chuckled, his laughter warm like a summer's day.
"Shut up. But tell me, why the secrecy? Why can't you share what's happening? Jin-Man usually keeps me in the loop when a mission comes up.”
Despite your persistent questioning, Honda remained resolute, his face as unreadable as a closed book. He gently loosened your grip on his arm. "Stop nagging me like Mama would. I can't divulge any details. It's not safe. But I need to go. Jin-Man needs me. Don’t you have any government sites to hack? Or do you plan on crashing our systems again?"
"Stop it, douchebag. You're being reckless. We need to tread with caution, especially now more than ever. You know that. And that was not my fault; their security was just… upgraded."
However, he simply shook his head as he smiled at your pout, pulling you into a warm embrace. The cold, hard metal of his brass knuckles, concealed in his pocket, pressed against your side. A chilling reminder of the danger that lay ahead. Yet you refrained from voicing your fears, choosing instead to hold him tight, the rhythm of your heartbeats synchronizing.
"Alright," you conceded, swallowing your protests, "at least take some food with you." Gesturing towards a Tupperware container on the table, filled with steaming eggs and a side of kimchi jeon—both staple dishes in your shared meals.
His eyes softened at your concern, and he took the offered container, pressing a quick kiss on your forehead before making his way towards the entrance.
As he neared the door, a rush of childhood memories invaded your mind. Sometimes you stayed up late whispering secrets under the covers; sometimes you felt his pain even when he was miles away, and sometimes you both fell off your bikes and ended up in the emergency room with scraped knees. They dubbed it the twin instinct, but to you, it was a lifeline, a warning system that alerted you when Honda was in danger.
"Honda, wait!" You called out, your voice echoing off the creaking wooden floorboards. 
The desperation in your plea stirred Gunpowder from her sleep, her tail twitching softly against the worn-out rug as though caught in a dream of chasing unseen mice. Honda turned, his hand still on the doorknob, his eyes questioning in the pale afternoon light filtering through the gaps in the old blinds.
A knot of guilt twisted in the pit of your stomach, threatening to crawl out through your lips and fill the room with its bitter taste.
The two of you were caught in a moment where petty bickering had canceled all the plans you had carefully added to your shared agenda. Your hands, once intertwined in unity, had become unglued from one another, your fingers now tangled in the strands of hair sprouting from your head. The hateful words you once spat at each other—words that had plunged through the gaps of your milk teeth—had turned into a somber reality. It suddenly seemed oddly appealing to consider dying in order to keep him around.
"I...I love you, brother," you admitted, the words feeling foreign yet so right. It was something you should have said a long time ago, after your parents' deaths, when it was just the two of you against the world. But you had always been afraid—afraid that admitting your fears would make them real.
A soft smile tugged at his lips as he nodded, an unspoken understanding passing between you two. "I love you too, sis," he signed before stepping out into the afternoon, leaving you in the silence of the empty apartment.
While life in the apartment carried on around you—the stove still burning, the TV blaring the evening news, Gunpowder curling around your ankles, licking your calves—you felt tears springing up in your eyes as your thoughts raced.
Come home, Honda. Come home and tell me everything about your day, from the way the sun glinted off the skyscrapers to the way the coffee tasted at your favorite café. Come home and argue with me again, about trivial things like who left the lights on or whose turn it was to do the dishes. Slam your bedroom door like you used to when we were teenagers and stomp around the house in Dad's old boots.
Come home and laugh with me, share those terrible inside jokes that only we understand. Handle your knife in the wrong way, the way you used to when you're not on a mission, when you're just my brother and not a covert operative. 
Come home and hold me again while I cry in your lap about the girls and boys that shattered my heart. Come home to fix the TV you always mess up with those greasy fingers of yours, leaving stains on the remote.
Scream at me if you need to; let out all that pent-up frustration that I know you keep bottled up inside. 
Come home and tell me how you always manage to burn the pasta, making it stick to the pots. Come home and let me nag about your messiness, about the dirty socks you always leave on the floor and about the dishes in the sink. 
But most importantly:
“Come home safe. Come home to me, Honda. Please."
2 months later
Late afternoon light filtered through the window, casting elongated, capering shadows across the glossy surface of your living room's hardwood floor.
Finally, after a whole day cleaning the place and trying to make it more child friendly, you were curled up in the embrace of the vintage couch and a soft, threadbare blanket, a relic from your childhood, was wrapped snugly around you, providing a comforting barrier against the creeping chill.
You idly stroked Gunpowder, who was as much a part of the family as any human member. Her fur was coarse, yet soothing under your fingertips.
Gunpowder was the only other living being that missed Honda as much as you did; her amber eyes held a profound sadness that echoed your own. You were grateful that Jin-Man let you take her from the animal shelter.
She didn't deserve to be alone, not when she had already lost so much.
With the monochrome scenes flickering against the brick wall, the contemporary television set in the room's corner was showing Casablanca.
Nonetheless, your mind was elsewhere, lost in a world of thought, meandering through a labyrinth of candid memories as your eyes were glued to the window, drinking in the expanse of the verdant family farm outside.
In your hands was your favorite cat mug, the one with the chipped ear and faded paint, a sentimental relic from your college days.
It was unusually quiet, the usual cacophony of farm life replaced by the relentless drumming of rain.
Not only was Ji-An nowhere to be seen, but Jin-Man's rusty truck had vanished from its customary location beside the red barn.
A glance at the old, ticking clock hanging on the wall—16:00, way past the time Ji-An usually got home from school—made your anxiety spike.
Just as you were about to pull on your trusty yellow raincoat to go look for her, you saw Jin-Man's truck pulling up the gravel driveway. He got out of the truck, his jacket hanging haphazardly off his broad shoulders, and his jaw clenched in a way that set off alarm bells in your head.
You quickly signed , "Hey! Old man! Good afternoon to you too! Where's Ji-An?" as he stomped past you, heading straight to his office. But he didn't answer; he didn't even spare you a glance.
Following him, you tried to make sense of what was happening, but he closed the office door right in your face. You were left standing there, frustration bubbling up inside you, a sense of foreboding making your heart pound in your chest.
As you paced around the living room, worry gnawing at you, the front door creaked open. Your heart leapt at the sound, and you turned around, expecting to see Ji-An, safe and sound.
But what you saw made your heart drop.
Ji-An walked in, soaked to the bone and covered in mud, carrying her pink backpack—the one her mother had bought for her last Christmas. Her uniform was clinging to her small frame, her hair plastered to her forehead, but she didn't make a sound. Not a sob, not a whimper.
Seeing her, you rushed over, dropping onto your knees to be at her level. "Ji-An, sweetheart, what happened? Why didn't you come home with Uncle Jin-Man?" you asked. A flutter of panic seized you as she remained silent, her eyes downcast. "Did something happen at school? You can tell me. I'm here for you."
“I need a bath, Noona. I don't want to talk about it right now. Is that okay?”
You looked at her for a long moment, the sight of her shivering form causing a lump to form in your throat. Her hair, previously neatly braided, was now a mess; the ties you had made for her earlier that morning were nowhere to be found.
"Yeah… Of course, baby," you reassured her, offering a weak smile.
With a sigh, you slowly rose to your feet and gently took her hand, leading her to the bedroom. You could feel her fingers tremble slightly in your grasp, her small hand cold and damp from the rain.
You then went to the bathroom to prepare a warm bath for her. You quickly grabbed a fresh set of clothes for her—a soft purple cotton t-shirt and a pair of comfortable cartoon pants that had cute little teddy bears printed on them. You placed them neatly on the bathroom counter, within her reach.
Once the bathtub was filled with warm water and a generous amount of bubble bath, you helped her undress the wet clothes sticking to her skin. 
While Ji-An enjoyed her warm bath, Gunpowder sat in front of the bathtub. Her amber eyes were focused on the bubbles, her tail twitching with curiosity. Every now and then, she would bat at a stray bubble, her paw slicing through the air with a fluid motion as if it were a game.
With Ji-An safely in the bath and the clothes inside the washing machine, you then went to the kitchen to begin preparing dinner. Using cookie cutters, you shaped the food into fun shapes—a star-shaped sandwich, fruit cut into the shape of animals, a bowl of soup with alphabet pasta. You even managed to make a small salad; the vegetables were bright and colorful. It was a small gesture, but you hoped it would bring a smile to Ji-An's face.
Throughout the days you've been living in this place, you've tried countless times to make Jin-Man and Ji-An eat at the same place, to share a meal like a family. But Jin-Man always avoided you and Ji-An like you were viruses, always eating small things before burying himself on the couch while watching movies all alone or in his office working with Pasin. It was frustrating to see the distance between them, but then again, it wasn't your job to force conversations and lovey dovey moments.
Once the food was ready, you set the table and then sat down in front of Ji-An, waiting for her to finish her bath. She emerged a while later, her hair damp and her cheeks flushed from the warm water.
Gunpowder, having finished her bubble play, twined around Ji-An’s legs as the child sat at the table. You both sat in silence for a while, the only sound being the gentle hum of the washing machine and the occasional clink of cutlery against plates.
Then, to your surprise, Ji-An was the one to break the silence.
"Today, I waited for Uncle Jin-Man to come and pick me up from school. But he was late, and it started to rain. I decided to walk home instead."
You watched as she continued to sign, her hands moving with a quiet determination. " I was walking in the rain when I saw Uncle Jin-Man's truck. He slowed down, but I didn't want to get in. I was upset with him. So, I continued to walk, even though it was raining hard. Uncle Jin-Man stopped and waited for me to get in, but I didn't."
“I wanted him to come out and apologize, to tell me he was sorry for being late. But he just accelerated and went away. I was so angry, Noona. I wanted him to understand how I felt and how it felt to be forgotten."  
"It's okay, baby. It's okay to feel upset. But remember, your uncle loves you very much. Sometimes, adults make mistakes too."
Shortly after dinner, you decided it was time for Ji-An to learn a new task: cleaning the dishes.
Filling the sink with warm, sudsy water, you showed her how to hold the scrub brush and guided her hand to clean the surface of the plates with gentle but firm strokes. You made sure she understood the importance of removing all leftover bits of food and how to rinse each dish thoroughly under the running water.
"Remember, Ji-An, cleaning is also a part of cooking. Once you're done eating, always make sure to clean up after yourself. It's not just about keeping your area clean, but also about respecting the people who will use the kitchen after you. See, we're not just cleaning up our mess; we're also preparing a clean space for the next person, " you signed, watching as she absorbed your words and continued washing the plates carefully under your watchful eye.
When you were done and completed with the task, you noticed that the sky had completely darkened, the bright hues of the day replaced by the deep blues and blacks of night. You gently dried Ji-An's small, pruney hands with a plush, soft towel and led her towards her bedroom. The room was bathed in the warm, cozy hue from the night lamp sitting on her bedside table, casting playful shadows that danced on the walls.
You tucked her into her bed. The fluffy comforter was pulled up to her chin, and you couldn't help but laugh at the way Gunpowder jumped onto her lap, purring contently.
"Noona," she signed, her eyes wide and luminous in the dim light, reflecting the soft glow of the night lamp. "Can you tell me a bedtime story? "
"Of course, sweetheart. Do you have any particular story in mind?" You asked, settling yourself comfortably at the edge of her bed, your hand gently rubbing soothing circles on her back.
"No, you choose, " she shrugged, her small body snuggling deeper into the warm covers.
You mulled over her request for a moment, your mind flipping through the pages of the countless stories you knew. Finally, one came to your mind. "There's a sad yet beautiful story from my hometown about two squirrels. They were mates—lovers for life and the town's favorite pair of animals. They were seen everywhere together, always chattering away in their own language, their tails intertwined. "
With each word, you painted a vivid picture of their life together. You told her about the female squirrel's illness and the male's devotion and his refusal to leave her side even in search of food.
As you narrated, you noticed Ji-An's eyes welling up with a faraway look. She interrupted you multiple times. "Why didn't the male squirrel eat?" "Why didn't he find another mate? " "Do all squirrels do this? "
You answered each question patiently, explaining the depth of the squirrel's love and the depth of his grief. You told her about how the male squirrel mourned for his mate, returning to their empty nest alone each year.
As you reached the end of the story, you noticed Ji-An's eyes growing heavy. Her questions became fewer and farther between, her chest moving slower until she slept. Still, she was twitching ever so slightly, hands closed and then jerking open in a rhythmic pattern that spoke volumes.
In an attempt to provide some comfort, you laid down next to her, being careful not to jostle her too much. You wrapped your arm around her small form, pulling her closer to your warmth.
Out of the corner of your eye, you saw a flash of yellow and red. The hyena. It was lurking in the corner of the room, its eyes gleaming malevolently in the dim light, eager to haunt you too. You didn't even turn to look at it. It was there, but it wasn't real. You knew it.
"Goodnight, Ji-An," you murmured softly, pressing a gentle kiss on her forehead, placing her bunny toy in the place where you'd been seconds before. "Sleep tight, sweetheart," you added, stroking her hair soothingly. "Noona's here. You're safe."
You switched off the night lamp, plunging the room into darkness, save for the faint moonlight filtering through the window.
As you left her room, you closed the door gently behind you, leaving the hyena and the remnants of your past locked away.
Easing back into the worn porch chair, the fabric of Jin-Man's purloined shirt fluttered against your skin in the cool night breeze. A stolen moment of solitude, with nothing but a half-burnt cigarette for company. 
The embers at the tip flickered, casting an eerie glow in the darkness. Drawing the cigarette to your lips, you inhaled, letting the sharp tang of nicotine coil around your senses and momentarily dull your worries. 
Eyes shut, you allowed your thoughts to drift to the intricate web of coding and changes you had to make in Murthehelp.
The only sounds were the distant hum of crickets and the soft rustling of leaves under the night sky's vast expanse. Yet, this tranquility was abruptly shattered by the encroaching sound of hushed footsteps gradually growing louder. Your eyes fluttered open to see Jin-Man standing before you, arms crossed over his chest, eyes fixed on the cigarette nestled between your fingers with a look of distaste as if you had the devil's hands between your lips.
A chuckle escaped you; the sight of Jin-Man, usually so composed, visibly irked by the cigarette, was enough to momentarily diffuse the tension. "Insomnia again?" you asked, flicking the ash off the cigarette with your thumb.
His hardened gaze didn't waver as he retorted, "I was waiting for you to come to bed."
You shrugged nonchalantly. Since your suicide attempt, Jin-Man has taken it upon himself to keep a watchful eye on you. The concept of solitary sleep had become foreign to both of you.
“What's eating at you?" he asked, his gaze softening slightly.
"Why did you abandon Ji-An at school?" 
"I got tied up and lost track of time," he replied, but his excuse fell on deaf ears. You scoffed at his words, well aware of the truth. He hadn't forgotten; he probably thought leaving Ji-An to trek home on her own would toughen her up.
"That's a load of crap, and you know it," you retorted, stomping out the cigarette under your feet. "Do you think making her walk home alone in the rain is going to make her stronger? Is that your grand plan?"
His silence was a response in itself, resonating in the quiet night air louder than any words.
"You are unbelievable, Jin-Man," you muttered. The scent of fresh paint and pine filled the air. It was a far cry from the gunpowder and blood that once filled your memory. But you couldn't help but crave it sometimes, even if it meant pain. Pain meant life; it meant survival. "You keep pushing her away relentlessly, like a stubborn child refusing his vegetables. You're so preoccupied with making her tough and resilient that you forget she's just a child. She needs your love and your understanding. You forget that she can't even communicate normally and that her aphasia is only getting worse! You don't even let me talk with her teacher, and don't pretend I don't know about the bullying she's enduring at school! We're not in Babylon , Jin-Man! We're in a small town where everyone knows everyone else. For heaven's sake, grow up!”
He retorted, his voice sharp as a blade, slicing through the heavy silence. “You should be more concerned with managing your own aphasia and PTSD. Ji-An’s not your responsibility. She's not related to you by blood. Drop this saintly act of playing mom. We're not her parents. This isn't a dollhouse and we're not Ken and Barbie.”
"Act? I kept Ji-An alive after her parents died! I trained her to communicate again! And even though it's hard, I've made her eat properly and taught her how to brush her teeth and do her homework again! I've been here for her every step of the way! You just... sit in your office or hide in your room!"
His jaw clenched tightly before he spoke again. "You think that's all it takes? Just feeding her and teaching her sign language?" He spat out angrily. The tip of his tongue traced his bottom lip as he continued speaking harshly, "It's not enough! She needs discipline! She needs structure!"
You shook your head violently. "She has enough structure! She needs us, Jin-Man! She needs our support, our guidance. She doesn't need a soldier; she needs a parent!" 
His face tightened, his eyes narrowing into dangerous slits. 
"Are you that afraid to care for someone, that afraid to love again? Are you hiding behind your uniform, your duties because you're too scared to face your own feelings?"
"Don't play with fire. You don't know what you're talking about."
"I think I do! And do you think Jin-Suk would like to see his daughter being trained as a warrior rather than growing up as a normal girl?" you challenged, your voice echoing with the strength of your belief.
The mention of his brother struck a nerve. A flash of anger crossed his stony features, and before you knew it, he was charging at you like a wild animal. 
Suddenly, Jin-Man's hands shot out, pushing you roughly against the wall. Your back slammed into the gnarled wooden planks, the splintered texture scratching against your skin. The impact sent a sharp jolt of pain through your spine, causing you to gasp as the wind was knocked out of your lungs.
"Why are you doing this, Jin-Man?" 
In response, his large, calloused hands wrapped around your throat in a vice-like grip, cutting off your airway. His fingers pressed against the delicate skin of your neck, the strength in his hands threatening to crush your windpipe. It felt like you were sinking into an abyss, the darkness of his rage engulfing you, making it impossible to breathe.
You clawed at his hands, desperate to pry them off. But his grip was unyielding; his hands felt like iron bands around your neck, tightening with every second that passed. As you gasped for breath, your vision started to spin, the edges blurring as black spots danced in front of your eyes. Your lungs felt like they were on fire, screaming for air.
Panic surged within you, a tidal wave that threatened to consume you. Time seemed to stretch, each second feeling like an eternity as you struggled to draw breath.
Finally, his grip loosened just slightly, allowing a sliver of oxygen to rush into your lungs. You gasped; the taste of air was like ambrosia—sweet and life-giving. Coughs racked your body as you struggled to regain control over your breathing, your throat raw and your chest heaving. The salty tang of tears prickled at the corners of your eyes, blurring your vision.
But you refused to back down, to give in to the fear. You locked eyes with him, defiance burning in your gaze. "Go ahead, Jin-Man, continue," you spat out, your voice raspy from the assault. "Kill me. But know this: my death won't change the truth.”
“Jesus, you're so weak, girl.”
A chuckle found its way through your bruised vocal chords. “Yeah? Wanna see who's weak then?”
Summoning every iota of your willpower, you retaliated against his suffocating hold. Your fingers clawed at his wrist, nails digging into his skin as you strained against his formidable strength. 
After a fierce and desperate struggle, your adrenaline-fueled power seemed to catch him off guard. With a sudden explosive kick, you managed to wrench yourself free, pushing him violently away from you.
Caught off balance, Jin-Man stumbled backwards. His feet skidded across the wooden floorboards, and his body crashed into the pot of vibrant lilies you had carefully chosen from the local market to adorn the porch. The pot shattered on impact, fragments of terracotta scattering across the floor, intermingling with the uprooted flowers and loose soil.
For a moment, the world seemed to hold its breath. The only sounds were the soft rustling of the brutalized lilies and the quiet patter of dirt falling onto the floor. But inside? Inside of you, the hyenas laughter echoed through your mind, mocking you for getting what you deserved—too used to chaos and violence.
The sight of the destruction seemed to snap Jin-Man out of his rage-induced stupor, his furious gaze softening as he took in the aftermath of your altercation.
"I'm done," you said, breaking the silence. "I'm done with this, Jin-Man. I'm done with your anger, your stubbornness, and your refusal to let anyone in. I'm done with the constant battles, the endless wars. I'm grabbing my stuff and leaving."
“Y/N…” He trailed off as he grabbed your arm roughly, pulling you around to face him. Your bodies were just inches apart now, his breath hot on your cheek as he pleaded silently.
“Don’t. Just shut your mouth and let me go. I'm not your Barbie, right?” Each word was punctuated by the bitter taste of blood as you absentmindedly touched your raw throat.
“You can't sleep alone.”
“I'll manage.”
“You can't remember when you last ate.”
"I'll set a reminder.”
"You can't drive without crying."
"I'll get a taxi."
"Ji-An needs you."
I need you.
"She needs you more."
"And you, Jin-Man," you added, the sting of your words sobering the air. "You need to realize that before it's too late."
----------------
April 3:
"Are you serious? Did I actually have to buy another chip to send you messages? You know, the store owner looked at me like I was crazy."
1 missed call from Ahjusshi
April 5:
"Ji-An keeps asking for you. She asked me to tell her the story about the couple of squirrels. You know, the one about their endless love and devotion."
2 missed calls from Jeong
April 7:
"Pasin showed me the link to the site. It's pretty quick and easy to access. Even an old man like me can make requests for guns, right? Technology these days, eh?"
April 11:
"She asked me to put on Casablanca. It's one of your favorites, right? I remember Honda telling me that you're addicted to Hollywood classics.”
“Gunpowder keeps sleeping on your side of the bed. I hate it.”
3 missed calls from Jeong Jin-Man, son of a bitch
April 22:
"I have a mission for you. It's critical and requires your skills."
"Can you come home so that we can discuss the details? There's something about it I can't trust in a message."
8 missed calls from the son of a bitch
“I guess I will ask So Min-Hye to replace you then. I know you wouldn't want that."
May 7:
“Ji-An's teacher told me that you visited her today. Did you really make two boys eat dirt by grabbing her money?”
“I could've helped.”
May 9:
“Went to the market today and heard Kyung Soo say that you're a good kisser. I had to stop myself from laughing."
“I heard from the locals that he went to the hospital after being knocked out. Strange, right? Or should I say, expected?"
May 16:
"Gunpowder brought a dead bird into the house. I think she's trying to replace you as the hunter of the family."
May 21:
"I saw a girl at the market wearing a dress you would like. It had sunflowers all over it. Made me think of you."
"She was about your age, too. For a moment, I thought it was you ."
-------
As Jin-Man speeds in the direction of Ji-An's school, his heart pounds against his ribs like a war drum. His knuckles turn white as he tightens his grip on the steering wheel, his forehead slick with beads of sweat. He curses himself silently, berating his own negligence.
How could he have not noticed that Ji-An hadn't come home?
The typical view of the small city blurs past him, the houses and trees merging into a hasty collage of colors under the evening gloom. The town's bakery, the park where the children play, and the old library all blur into indistinguishable shadows. But he barely registers any of it. His mind is filled with vivid images of you screaming at him for this oversight.
He imagines your small fists beating at his chest, your eyes—those captivating eyes that he secretly admired—flaring with anger and worry. 
“How could you forget her again , Jin-Man? She's just a child!"
The guilt, like a ravenous beast, gnaws at him, driving him to press the pedal harder. The old engine protests, its roar echoing through the tranquil evening. 
Suddenly, he remembers his phone.
Snatching it from the passenger seat, he dials your number hastily. The line rings once, twice, thrice, but there's no answer. He fumbles to leave a voicemail, his voice shaking slightly as he speaks into the device. "Hey, I… messed up. Ji-An... I… Just call me back.”
The voicemail ends with a beep, leaving Jin-Man alone with his thoughts and the eerie silence of the empty road. He tosses the phone onto the passenger seat, his eyes never leaving the road.
Nearing the school, his eyes flicked to the digital clock on the dashboard—it read 19:00, the hour when the last echoes of childhood laughter usually fade away. But now, the school grounds were eerily silent and deserted, a stark contrast to the daytime symphony of playful shouts and laughter. The playground, usually a vibrant hub of activity, was painted with somber shades, the swings swaying lightly in the breeze, their squeaky chains the only sound piercing the silence.
As he swung into the school's parking lot, a small figure suddenly sprang from the shadows, frantically waving his arms. 
A boy was shouting, his voice hoarse and strained, as he pointed towards the grimy basement door at the rear of the school building. "She's locked there!"
Without a second thought, Jin-Man abandons his car, leaving the engine running as he sprints towards the basement door. The door is locked, but within, he can hear Ji-An's voice, her pleas echoing through the desolate night. 
"Jeong Jin-Man! Jeong Jin-Man! Jeong Jin-Man!" she is calling, her voice scratchy and strained, likely from the first use of her vocal cords in months.
Frantically, he scans his surroundings. His eyes land on a fire safety box nearby. Inside, he spots a hammer. 
With no time to spare, he smashes the box, glass shards raining onto the worn-out asphalt. He grabs the hammer, using it to break the rusted chains and unlock the door. 
In a final heave, he throws the door open, revealing Ji-An inside. Her cheeks were flushed red from crying and her eyes were brimming with a mix of relief and fear.
She doesn't waste any time rushing at him, her small fists pounding against his chest. He doesn't move; he doesn't try to stop her. She's screaming at him, her words punctuated by her furious hits: "Why did you take so long? You promised you were coming back soon! Why did you arrive so late? Why did you let her go? Why did you let Noona go? Why? Why?"
He could only look at her, absorbing her words and feeling each syllable like a physical blow. Her pain, her anger, and her confusion were all directed at him. 
Then he did the only thing he could think of—the only thing he thought you would have done in this situation. 
He pulled her into a tight, protective hug.
For minutes, he doesn't say a word until he grabs her, holding her close.
Turning to the boy, he nods, "I'll give you a ride home."
The journey to the kid’s home was silent, save for the muted hum of the car's engine and the occasional rustle of cloth against leather. 
Ji-An was huddled against the passenger seat, her body trembling slightly. Noticing this, he pulled off his jacket, wrapping it around her small frame in the same way he did for you.
After dropping the boy off and Ji-An finally falling asleep, he drives aimlessly. The city lights flicker past in a hazy blur, their glow casting fleeting shadows on his face. He thinks of you—your laughter, your anger, and your determination. It's strange, he thinks, how the absence of someone can fill a room, a house, or a life.
His thoughts are interrupted by the sudden ringing of his phone.
Glancing at the screen, he sees your name flashing. He hesitates, his thumb hovering over the decline button. 
But then he remembers how things used to be and how it felt to hear your voice without the weight of regret and guilt. He misses when your name didn't make his chest ache, when it was just a name he heard now and then but held no significance to him.
He yearns for the days when he didn't know you, when his eyes didn't instinctively scan every room he entered in hopes of finding you there. He misses the sight of you standing among strangers, wearing that ridiculous skirt he used to tease you about but now finds himself missing.
He finds himself longing for the mundane details. How you'd take off your shoes at the front door, placing your keys with care in the small glass bowl on the corner of the kitchen counter. How you'd drape your coat over the back of a dining room chair, your socks left at the foot of the bed next to the sleeping cat.
He misses holding back your hair as you succumb to the side effects of your PTSD pills, your body rejecting the chemicals meant to help you cope. He yearns for the times when you would climb under the white blankets with him, forcefully opening his arms to encase you between them.
He misses how you would place your legs on top of his and let your hands wander to his waist and chest. He misses hearing you say, "I missed you," telling him about your day as you would slowly drift off to sleep. And he longs for the times he would secretly kiss your cheek softly before he inevitably had to leave you for work.
He misses when you were simply strangers—not two people who act like strangers in public but once knew each other better than they ever knew themselves. He misses the simplicity of those days and the innocence of not knowing what it felt like to lose you.
Because, in the end, when the lights are off and his eyes flutter shut, the back of his mind always whispers your name, calling out to you like you are the only place he was ever meant to call home .
When he finally decided to answer the call, he placed the phone on the dashboard, the worn leather creaking under the weight. He switched to speaker mode, the familiar chime filling the small space of the car. 
"Hello?"
Tinny and distant over the phone speaker, you responded almost immediately. "You left a voicemail. What happened?" In the background, he could hear the faint, unmistakable sound of a lighter flicking open and the soft hiss of a cigarette being lit.
"Your voice sounds rough," he commented, trying to lighten the heavy atmosphere with a touch of humor. "How many days have you been communicating only with sign language?"
"Shut up, motherfucker. What about Ji-An?”
"I…" he started, faltering. The words he needed to say were stuck in his throat, like a bitter pill he couldn't swallow.
“Look, Ji-Man. I have nothing to do with you anymore. I’m calling you back because you sounded like a wounded little bitch and you said her name. Drop the show and spit it out.”
“I failed again, okay?" The confession spilled out of him, the words tasting like defeat. But he couldn't stop there; he had to finish what he started. "But, look, Ji-An spoke.”
He could almost hear your sharp intake of breath and the sound of the cigarette being hastily put out in the background. There was a long, drawn-out silence, the kind of silence that spoke volumes. He could imagine your surprise—the way your eyes would widen slightly, the lit cigarette forgotten in your hand. But when you finally spoke, your voice was quiet, filled with a strange mix of relief and trepidation.
"She spoke?"
"Yes. She called out to me. She used her voice, and she spoke."
"Look, I'm not going to pretend that everything is okay between us," he continued, his voice gruff, "But I'm also not going to pretend that we don't have a shared past. One that involves a little girl who misses you."
"You're such a bastard. You know how to manipulate me using her," you snapped, the sound of a chair creaking in the background signaling your agitation.
"Maybe, but it doesn't change the fact that Ji-An misses you. And you miss her too, don't you?"
A silence followed his words—not an uncomfortable one, but a silence filled with unspoken words and a shared history. And then you sighed, a deep, heavy sigh that echoed with the weight of your unspoken thoughts.
"I do miss her. But you, Jeong Jin-Man, are a pain in my ass.”
He couldn't help but chuckle at your words. "I've been told that before."
"I'm sure you have."
Another silence filled the line, comfortable yet heavy with years of shared experiences.
"By the way," he added, his voice softer now, "the key is still under the cat statue you put by the front door. You can drop by anytime."
"I'll think about it. But don't expect me to come running back, Jin-Man. We're not the same people we used to be."
"I know. But we're still us, aren't we?"
"We're something ," you admitted, a sigh slipping past your lips. "But I don't know what that is anymore."
"Neither do I. But maybe we can figure it out together, old lady."
"Old lady?" you scoffed, a hint of amusement in your voice. "Coming from a man who's 10 years older than me."
"Years are still years," he teased, a smile playing on his lips. "But whatever we are, Y/N, whatever we become, you're still… something to me. And so is Ji-An. Remember that."
"I will. I will, Ahjusshi."
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the-expired-tofu · 1 year ago
Text
The Devil's Trumpets | Pt. 2
|| A 'The Glory' fanfic || MINORS DNI [18+]
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a/n: Hey there, this is my first time writing a fan fiction. I might change a few things in my fictions later on. Also, my English isn't my first language so my writing might lack some fluency. Hope you enjoy :)
trigger warnings: lots of swearing, bullying, murder, gore, depression, abuse, mature content, violence, sexual themes.
pairing: reader x multi
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Y/N
Heaven never appeared to be on my side since I was born. My prayers were never answered. I dreaded waking up everyday when I was in highschool. You see, I never asked for any of this. I simply wished to lead a normal life. Is that too much to ask for?
My parents divorced when I was seven years old. My mother chose to marry a wealthy man and take my sister with her. While I were to stay with my alcoholic father. Even though I shared the same roof with him, I always felt lonely. He was always spending all of my money on more alcohol. Luckily he never abused me. I had to take care of him. Each and everyday became more difficult for me. Leaving with my mother would have been a very different experience. I'm curious of what made her change her mind. She always gave me the same reason for leaving me with my dad.
“Someone has to stay behind to look after him.” She did send us money from her husband’s account to cover up my father’s medication. That’s how we kept in contact with each other. The day she left us was the last time I saw her and my sister. My mother never bothered to make a call nor visit us, or even check on us. I figured she left us for her own good.
However, I was quite close to my sister. Even our parents' divorce couldn't properly separate us. We used to write letters to one another every day since I couldn’t afford a cell-phone for myself. I kept all her letters in a box till this day.
Living like this in Semyeong never really bothered me. Taking care of my dad all by myself was quite difficult if I say, but other than that, I was fine. Until one day, I was walking on the school grounds to get to the cafeteria, when I heard a horrifying  scream coming from the gym. There were quite many students casually walking near the place. How come nobody heard that?
Now that I even think about it, I realize I should have exercised caution while being curious. I decided to check out the issue. And that’s when everything started.
I was peeking through the door when I noticed a group of four students crowding near the stage. I could here some laughs when I noticed a girl with straight long hair coming out of the crowd. That’s when I saw her for the first time.
Moon Dong-Eun. Both her hands were tightly held by two more students, Son Myeong-Oh and Choi Hye-Jeong, while Lee Sa-Ra was holding Yeon-jin’s hair curling iron.
“Hey!”
I lost my balance and fell on my back. It was a guy holding a basketball and stood right over me.
“Oh come on do I look that bad?” He asked as he grabbed me by my hair.
“NO, NO, NO, PLEASE NO!! HELP!! ” I yelled for help and not one student wandering outside the gym came for my help.
“Yeah you’re fucking ugly Jae-joon, no wonder why she fell when she saw you.” That was Lee Sa-ra. She held a cigarette in her mouth while curling Yeon-jin’s hair.
He dragged me near the place where Moon Dong-Eun was lying. I noticed a burn on her right arm that resembled the shape of the curling iron. I had to get away from this place. I have to call the police.
I tried to free myself from his grasp but he dragged me back to the same place where Dong-Eun was. She was almost unconscious when I called out for her.
“Call her all you want. Neither can she help you, nor can anyone else.” Hye-Jeong let out a laugh when she dangled the keys in front of me.
“Oh look! Dong-eun has a friend now,” said Yeon-jin with a pout on her face.”Isn’t that adorable?” She said as she cupped my face with her hands.
“What’s your name?” she asked me while she looked down at my legs.
“She asked you a fucking question, you bitch,” asked Jae-joon who still held me by my hair with a painful grip.
“Well what does it say on her nametag?” said Yeon-jin as she opens the pin of the tag from my shirt. “Y/N. What a pretty name, and such pretty legs,” she took a few steps back to take a look at my legs again. “I wonder how my cigarettes would look on them.”
“Look, please, I swear I wont tell anybody, please let me go, I have to go back, I have to take care of my dad, he is not doing well. Please let me go” I started crying because I knew, I have no way out.
“Well the show hasn’t even started yet and you already want to go back?” said Yeon-Jin. She started backing away from me when she raised her thumb at me and then all of them started grabbing me at the edge of the stage. Myeong-oh and Hye-jeong grabbed me by my arms. I started panicking when I saw Sa-ra walking towards me with three burnt cigarettes together.
“NO PLEASE NO!!”
She shushed me with her finger on my lips. “This is high quality weed. Nobody can say no to these babies,” She said as she pointed the cigarettes towards me. She took a puff out of the three cigarettes together and grabbed me by my thighs. Before I even knew it, she pressed those together on my thighs.
My scream echoed on the walls of the gym. I tried flinging my legs in the air but she held them with a firm grip.
After she was done with my left leg, she went on to press them on my right one.
My screams became more and more distorted as I choked on my tears. My lungs, my throat, my legs, everything hurt.
“Oh my god, this bitch is fucking loud. Can someone shut her up?” said Yeon-jin.
“On it,” said Jae-joon. He threw the basketball away he was playing with a while ago and put his hand inside his pocket to take out a small bottle eye drops. He pressed a few drops on his eyes and put it back inside. I remember that it was that day he brutally beat up another guy who made fun of his colorblindness. His knuckles were still red from that guy’s blood.
“Imagine if she ever screamed my name,” said Jae-joon with a smirk on his face as he threw the ball away.
"Can you just shut the fuck up and shut her up?"
He grabbed my waist firmly and put his palm over my mouth tight shut.
Sa-ra continued pressing the cigarettes on my skin. My muffled screams died down eventually when I started feeling numb. This went on for quite long as I remember.
“Yeah that’ll do.”
Sa-ra removes the cigarettes from my thighs and lets go of my legs. I slid down the table and dropped to the floor. The stinging pain in my legs grew worser.
“She’s already out? Damn she’s weak as fuck,” Yeon-jin said as she nudged with her shoes on my thighs.
“Why did you do this to me? What harm did I ever do to you people?” I muttered.
“Because bitch if we didn’t, you would have told someone about us. Even though nobody even gives a shit about what we do. Nobody will ever believe you, and nobody will ever come to save your day” Yeon-jin said in a sing-song voice and the others laughed as she stood towered over me.
“What a whore,” said Myeong-oh. He kicked me at the back as I winced from the pain.
“Hey let’s go to the karaoke bar, it’s opened by now,” said Hye-jeong.
“Bye hoes,” Sa-ra waved as she walked away with others.
I laid there, barely conscious. My tears didn’t stop and my eyes were stinging. The world grew blurry around me. The burning pain, the bruises, the wounds, my head, the ringing in my ears, everything felt worse. I couldn’t even move. Before I knew anything else, I passed out on the gym floor.
*
I wiped the steam off my mirror as I stood naked in front of it. Some of the burnt skin on my thighs grew pinkish red over the years.
        I wore some clothes on and started drying my hair. Min-hee is fast asleep in her room. I collected all the dishes from the table and put them in the sink. It’s 11.45 p.m. My sleep can wait.
        I turned my phone on and opened Facebook. I searched up Moon Dong-Eun. I found a profile under the same name but there weren’t any pictures. I wonder if it’s really hers.
        I was staring at her profile. Should I search them up as well? I mean, I have to if I want to change my mind.
        I searched up Yeon-jin’s profile first. She worked as a weather forecaster at a news channel and married the CEO of Jaepyeong Construction in Semyeong, Ha Do-yeong. She had a child named Ha Ye-sol, same age as Min-hee.
        Jeon Jae-joon is a wealthy heir to a country club and helped up scaling a clothing boutique named Siesta.
        Lee Sa-ra became an artist.
        Choi Hye-jeong works as a flight attendant.
        For Son Myeong-oh, I couldn’t gather much information about him except maybe he works for Jeon Jae-joon.
        This much was quite enough for me. I put my phone down on the table and rested my head on my arms. I kept staring at the ceiling. The yellow light from the street outside illuminated my room. I looked over at Min-hee, she’s fast asleep.
        I took my phone and went over to the common balcony. I opened up my call logs on my phone as I closed the door behind me to make sure Min-hee doesn’t wake up. At the top of my call logs displayed Moon Dong-eun’s name. I almost made the call  when I paused.
        Wait, no. Am I doing the right thing?
        I didn’t press on her name yet. Instead, I stretched back by holding on the railings and looked over at the city before me. Seoul looks beautiful especially at night. The city lights flickered like the stars in the sky. All the quietness up here and the distant hustle of the people and traffic made me calm.
I closed my eyes and let out my breath. I looked back at my phone and pressed her name. I pressed the phone against my ear. After a few rings at my end, ”Hello Moon Dong-Eun? It’s me,  Y/N.”
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bylightofdawn · 2 years ago
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So I don't know if I will emotionally, mentally or physically make i through episode 8 of Beyond Evil.
This episode has been a fucking EMOTIONAL ROLLERCOASTER that has inflicted emotional damage on me.
Thoughts and spoiler cuts beneath the cut.
Oh my god everything with Kang Jin-muk makes my fucking skin crawl. The close up of him eating the noodles and the dutch angle just made it like 10,000 x more upsetting.
His smug smarmy and the taunting way he keeps trying to upset everyone and Dong-sik in particular. Just…OH MY GOD. Someone kill this man. He needs to die.
They fucking BROKE ME at the crematorium scene. Everything with that. Dong-sik needs a hug desperately. Someone give this man a hug and tell him it's going to be okay. Him torturing himself and imagining how he failed Kang Min-jeoeng in her final moments. The fucking shot of him standing on top of the place she was slowly suffocating to death right underneath him. The cinematography of that entire shot? Just mwah chef-kiss.
That is actual nightmare fuel personified there.
And then little Mr Sunshine Oh Ji-hoon just having a mental breakdown because he’s blaming himself for being there and not knowing she was in danger. FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK.
The emotional damage of this episode.
And then they go and give us unhinged Dong-sik just grinning like an absolute feral madman when he taunts Kang Jin-muk into strangling him? So help me if fanficcers aren’t writing some absolutely FILTHY Dong-sik getting off to breathplay smut I WILL BE SO DISAPPOINTED IN YOU.
I also love that Han Ju-won just fucking shut down because he oops caught feelings and can’t handle the fact he was willing to murder a man for daring to touch his little Meow Meow. This man is so emotionally constipated he can’t even.
My mans really needed to take an emotional sabbatical because he caught the fee-fees.
And then this fucking show has the AUDACITY to hand us the fertile AU of rent-boy Ju-won and Donk-sik being his client with Dong-sik AS ALWAYS flirting like crazy with him and asking him what kind of flower boy he would be.
HOW DARE YOU. I also love the entire restaurant scene and Han Ju-won trying to be the edgelord that he is who hates icky things like feelings and friendships. Whilst he is TURNING HIMSELF INSIDE OUT EMOTIONALLY for a dead hooker he used as bait just because he doesn’t want her to lay in a ice box for months on end unloved and unclaimed.
And our king Dong-sik just calling him out on his bullshit as always.
Also? I hate to tell you this boo but YOU are the clingy one in that relationship. You and your mancrush obsessing over Dong-sik which was so strong you moved to a whole new city just to try and ‘catch’ him. Uh huh. You keep telling yourself that, boyo.
And Jeong-je and his awful mother. Please tell me this poor damaged manchild is not still living at home because that sadly would explain a lot about his Peter Pan syndrome and why an adult man is wearing a hideous hair cut like his. Pfffffft He is a poster child for arrested development. And is so emotionally fragile but my mans has a lot of rage in him and I'll be interested to see where his story heads.
But then it has to end with them finding Jae-i’s mother and just…fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck all over again.
I am exhausted after every episode of this show. And cannot binge it all at once because it makes me feel too many things
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inkedobsidian · 8 months ago
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~ niece vs uncle ~
prompt: #27 “This is girl talk, so leave.”
summary: Jin-Man getting jealous over little Ji-An because Y/N gives her full attention to Ji-An
pairing: Jeong Jin-Man x Reader
warnings: a little suggestive but its more just cute
word count: 576
a/n: (Yes the gifs Lee Yeon but its cute so) Requests are open! Prompt list is there if you guys want extra ideas
Master-List - Prompts
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Jin-Man was worried when he introduced Y/N to Ji-An because he didn’t want Ji-An to feel uncomfortable but frankly he wasn’t prepared for just how much Ji-An would like his partner. At first Ji-An would not talk to Jin-Man or even be near him but she would always exist next to Y/N if she was around. By the time Ji-An actually spoke to anyone you would always hear her little voice yapping away telling Y/N whatever story she could think of.
Jin-Man didn’t mind until Ji-An started to talk to Y/N in private more. He didn’t want to seem like a clingy partner but from the moment Ji-An was home from school she would have Y/N behind a closed door telling her all the secrets she’s heard that day. It was strictly something he was not allowed to join. What a time in his life that he is jealous of a literal child, his niece no less. He just laughs to himself at the thought as he walks up the hallway towards his bedroom door.
He opened the door to find Ji-An and Y/N sat crossed legged on the bed with some quiet music in the background. Y/N was facing the door as she normally does whatever room she’s in, so the minute the door opened her face broke out into a smile. Little Ji-An moved her whole body so she could see and faced her uncle with a stern face and crossed arms.
“This is girl talk, so leave.” Ji-An huffed out with far too much authority for such a little girl. Jin-Man and Y/N both let out a small laugh at her reaction. Jin-Man just walked further into the room.
“You know Y/N is my girlfriend right? You can’t have her 24/7.” He said getting down to Ji-An’s eyeline. All she did in retaliation was stick her tongue out in the direction of her uncle. Y/N just let out another laugh and couldn’t believe that they were having a little battle over her.
“You have her while I’m in school.” Ji-An huffs again making sure to cross her arms again this time with more force to let her uncle know she was really serious. At this point Jin-Man took his index finger and placed it against Ji-An’s forehead and pushed her small frame back lightly having her fall backwards into the bed. At this point Y/N stood up to walk towards the door.
“Okay you two no more fighting I’m not going anywhere,” Y/N put her arm over Jin-Man’s shoulders and he stood up at the feel of her touch letting her lean into him slightly. She placed her arm on his lower back and started moving back towards the bedroom door leading Jin-Man out of the room. They finally made it out into the hallway and Y/N closed the door behind her masking their conversation, “She goes to bed in 2 hours, surely you won’t die waiting?”
“Y’know what this time I might.” Jin-Man decided to be as serious as he could be but the smile on her face nearly broke the whole joke facade.
“Well that’s unfortunate if you die, I’m all alone at night…” She let her sentence trail off as she let her hand fall down from his shoulders to his hands slowly, leaving him covered in goosebumps as the door in front of him closed once again leaving the girls alone. 2 hours couldnt be so hard, could it?
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lumizwrld · 9 months ago
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PROFESSIONAL✯
"I love, you love. This love, we're professional..."
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➢ !Dom¡ Ryohei Arisu ♥︎ Afro-Latina Reader
☕︎ word count ・3.2k (This late ass lil Valentine's Day smut, I'm so mad bc I wanted to post this on valentines Day but I ended up changing some things around.♥︎) GIF~ @jeongjinman
⚠︎NSFW WARNING⚠︎
cw ✐ outside the borderland universe, valentines day sex, shy arisu turning into dom, sensual, passionate, roughness, dirty talking, teasing, arisu eating reader out, cowgirl, missionary, reverse cowgirl, swallowing, submissive reader, moaning, whimpering, groaning, arisu being a good boyfriend, only Arisu Ryohei's perspective
✍︎ Summary = Not only had it been Valentine's Day, but it was also the day that Arisu showed his all to you. Being your boyfriend of just 1 year, he wanted to end this Valentine's Day off with a banger. As you're met with his surprise, you also find him hiding away from you (knowing his cowardness). After met, you encountered with his aggression, his frustration with himself, handing it all out to you in the most sinful way. ✧
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It felt like she was never going to walk through that door, time unexpectedly reached a standstill lingering for her urgently to open that door and die from the death-defining adornment of all my love scattered through the apartment loft.
Anxious, I spent hours trying to find the best-looking outfit I could find and made sure it was her favorite color. Midori, the creation of yellow and blue. A green dress suit that complimented black pants and a pair of dress shoes embodied on me. I only desired perfection yet, she wouldn't want it any different. She would be happy even if I wore black sweats and a white t-shirt. From what I can recall earlier, she preached, “Please don’t go overboard about today, when I come back home, let's just smoke and lay in each other's arms? That could be our lil Valentine's Day right there." however, I feel like sometimes she doesn’t know how tenacious I can be when I listen to her.
Call it crazy, I was never the type to do anything so grand as this. Granted, I’m best with my hands yet I’d never expected to create an outbreak of devotion to her. Petals of roses scattered all over the floor, the flame of the candles shining so bright like an August day, inhaling the air of romance in the atmosphere, and centering the stage with her favorite songs faintly singing their way throughout the place….
God, she's gonna kill me…
“Shit Y/N, stop making me panic like crazy just hurry please…” I prayed in my head, disregarding the fact that the more I kept my eyes on the door the more I’d be tempted to faint. “C’mon baby, make it home quick.”
Pacing, fidgeting of fingers as I tried to ignore how nervous I was. “Shit.” I groaned to myself, placing my arms behind my head. For a moment, I thought I heard keys fidgeting at the door. Anxiety rushed all over me again, striding toward the door and then taking a slight step back.
“Fuck,” I groaned, “I-I can’t do this…” I uttered in my head.
“Baby I’m home-“ She spoke before being astounded at the place. I could sense her soft footsteps kissing the floor, loving every moment of this affection. Nonetheless, I hid in the master bathroom. Heart pulsating out my chest, I had no clue why I felt terrified to meet her.
She drives me crazy, I hate the way I get with her…
I hate that she tenses me up without doing absolutely anything to me…
Her gentle voice sang out my name yet I refused. It was guilt, agitation, and love fighting in my body right now. I couldn’t regulate to move.
“Ryohei? Where are you amor come out,” She questioned, sauntering up the stairs to the bedroom. “Baby you don’t understand how in love I am with the place. You didn’t have to do this.”
“G-Give me a second hani, I-I’m in the bathroom.” I notified her, head thrown into my palms as I elongated a groan.
“Hey…” She expressed, embracing her body against the bathroom door. “Don’t hide from me. Don’t be nervous baby, I love what you did. Thank you for that.”
A weak giggle flew from my lips, “Hani I’m fine I swear. I just had to use the bathroom that’s all. You love it huh?”
I could hear her voice pitch up scarcely, chuckling while battling to open the door for me. “Ryohei c’mon, I wanna see you.”
Hesitated, my hands trembling as if the temperature plunged in the room. I held my breath for an instant, my hand reaching out for the knob. A slight turn for the lock, gradually opening the door was all I needed to do before her eyes lit with a thousand stars.
“Hi…” I spoke, shoving my hands in my pockets as her eyes scrutinized my frame.
“You went all out for me,” She confessed, creeping closer to me with her hands elevated towards my chest. “You look so handsome cariño, oh my god…” She adored, inclining her head against my neck.
“I’m sorry for-“
“I know it’s okay, you went all out for me I know this probably overwhelmed you.”
“I just feel like I made this awkward now. I hid away from you and it’s like…I’ve been waiting for you all day you don’t understand mama I-
How swiftly, her lips shut my doubts up. Her fingers, locked themselves up behind my waist. Her tongue, communicating with mine. She made me melt in her embrace, I didn’t know where to position my hands. It was so bad how this kiss instantly made me desperate for her.
My head tilted inwards, permitting her hand to crawl up my back to the strands of my hair. She certainly knew for a fact that this was all gonna be in her control yet, I desired things to change for a second. Her free hand seizes my neck as her kisses trailed down my lips to my jawline. I guess this was her turn to show me her devotion to me cause, it had me to a point where it illustrated all over my face how badly I wanted to touch her beautiful body. All her pent from work, relieved from my bare hands. Even though she was always the one to command, I yearned for this to be all about her.
“How was work baby?” I communicated, my hand going for the back of her head as she made love to my neck.
���It was slow, but…All I thought about was you. I couldn't wait to get here.”
“That's…” I spoke before sighing at her gentle bites. “Good to hear baby, I've just been doing this all day.”
“I can tell, you do love me.” She whispered in my ear. Kissing it gradually, she was luring me deeply into her pool of lust.
“C’mon baby, let me take this off you.” I offered, taking her coat off. As she became free from the restriction of her puffer coat, her hands latched onto my entire body. “Baby, it's okay you don't gotta rush.”
“It's not me rushing, you deserve this.”
“I deserve this? All I did was just show you how much you mean to me, you always show me how much you love me. Granted I do, but I wanna do it in a form-”
I could feel her taking the lead, slowly walking back to the bed as she clung to me. “Mi amor, you talk too damn much. Just look pretty and let me do everything okay?”
I giggled, “Alright don't fuck with me like that."
She giggled in unison, “You’re everything to me. I love you, but you need to realize how much you are worth. You're worth every fucking thing on this planet.”
I guess this was it.
I guess this is where it ends.
All this shyness, is gone.
I guess, this was where I made a mark.
I pushed her onto the bed, leaping on top of her frame. My hands grasping her neck as if she disrespected every inch of me. This went along with a harsh, desperate kiss.
I heard a whimper, yet that didn't cross my mind at all. I could tell she was surprised with every bit of emotion rushing throughout her body in this moment. Mainly, I was focused on one thing.
“Nobody’s ever told me that before until I met you. You love me too damn much, that's one thing I fucking hate about you. I hate how you make me feel this way and don't let me do anything in return.” I spoke right in her ear, her pants in mine as a form of a response.
“Ryohei…” She sighed.
“I want you,” I demanded, finding my way down my belt buckle. “I want you to let me do everything.”
Her hands reached on my belt, supporting me with unbuckling. Crazy, it seemed like I had her wrapped around my finger.
Assertive, her hand went inside my pants.
Heart felt, the way I spoke in her ear.
Temptation, her hands trying not to go any further.
“I won't stop you at all.”
“Y/N…”
“Do it please, I promise I won't stop you.”
Her desperate hands found me in my boxers, exposing myself on her own. Her kisses deprived my lips again, this time with a sense of belonging to be submitted to me.
Her defeat, she wanted this from me all along.
So in my response...
Don't hold this back, let it out….
First, it was me losing myself in between her legs.
Her thighs were gripped with my cold hands as I kissed the lips of her deprived pussy, darting into her eyes while I licked her sensitive clit. She felt the exhilaration instantly, her hands lost in my hair as she whimpered for me to slow down and stop. Still, such a beautiful woman who doesn't know how hard-headed I can be.
"Fuck." She moaned, "Ryohei just like that, lick me like that."
I answered her demands, licking her til she would see stars while I had my free hand teasing the entrance of her hymen. Entreating her right, she kept trying to close her legs yet I retained them open with all my might.
"You're all in my mouth." I teased, "All in my mouth."
She winced, panting at my fingers fucking her, imitating what I had planned for in a moment. Her begs and cries, all in my ear like a siren luring in a sailor. She had me hypnotized.
"I've never been so jealous of fingers in my life." I teased once again, "Mama, why are you holding yourself back?"
"I-I'm not."
"No?"
"Y-Yeah."
"Why are you lying to me?" I spoke, inching myself up to her face. "Don't lie to me."
I then lost myself in her eyes, brushing her hair from her cheeks. Nobody said anything, just a swift grab from her back, switching positions that transitioned this moment.
Her warm skin was positioned on top of me as her hand latched on my chest while straining to place me inside her. Her eyes revealed all her lust, how she begged for me without even saying a word. Gradually, she consumed all of me. Songs in unison, allowing me to thrust deep inside her warmth. It was as if this was the last day we'd be together. Who would have known, I'd be the one in control of this.
“Hold my hands mama, let me help you.” I panted, observing her lustful face as her body fucked with mine. “Nobody can hear you let it out for me baby.”
“Don't say that Ryohei.” She moaned, tossing her head back.
“Why?” I conversed, “The way I'm talking to you, does it bother you?”
“You know exactly what you're doing.” She groaned, vigorously grinding herself to the profound thrusts I provided.
“Tell me then, what am I exactly doing then? Speak to me mama, tell me what I'm doing to you.” Overstimulated, her hands released mine and grasped on my neck. This encouragement I gave was gonna finish with something grand I persisted to myself. However, it seemed like even when this is finished. She's gonna want more.
My cold hands rushed to her nipples, caressing them with gentle squeezes. The evil giggles she made that were intended with lust filled my ears, moaning afterward when I brought her close for me to suck on.
“I want you on top.” She panted faintly.
“What did you say?” I questioned, slowing my strokes.
“Please,” She panted, “Get on top of me.”
My eyes dilated, soon switching positions. She looked so innocent, like a porcelain doll. So fragile if I were to even touch her, she’d break. My arms found themselves beside her head as she held the support placing me inside her again. Silk soft legs, trapping me around my waist as a so-called embrace.
“Is this a trap?”
“What are you gonna do if I say yes?”
Aggressive, I thrusted once. Her gasp left her lips however before getting just a slight exhale, I placed my index finger right inside her needy mouth. Creeping myself closer to her face, she was like a model, a sight of pure beauty to me. This was all mine.
All of her was mine...
All of mines, to ruin...
Sounds of sin, the aroma of sex, the sloppiest of kisses, the sensing of sweaty skin, all at once could be seen as a form of art. My hand went from her lips to fondling her chin as the other maintained my balance, compelling her to look directly into my eyes as I slowly stroked up the pace.
“You want it like this baby?” I moaned, observing her surrender her beautiful body to me. "Tell me your beautiful thoughts I promise it won't hurt to just tell me."
“I-I can’t,” She panted, straining to fuck me in unison. “Control me fuck, I feel like such a whore Ryohei I'm sorry-”
“No no, fuck me like a whore then, don’t be scared baby. Show me how much of whore you can be to me.” I encouraged her, leaving her to snatch my hand and kiss my fingers, slowly suckling them.
“Ruin me, ruin me.” she entreated. First my thumb, then my index finger along with my middle. She replicated what she would do to me, It was to a point where I could die right from how much of a slut I turned her into. Neediness overfilling her eyes as she wished for me to cum...
Was it bad that I faintly felt it?
“Ruin? Did I bother you too much hani? I'm sorry, that's all my fault. Isn't it?” I giggled, moaning afterward.
“Don’t apologize,” she panted, removing my damp hair that began to cover my eyes from the thrusting. “I love everything you’re doing to me.”
“I forgot to tell you how beautiful you looked today. Mama is this what you want from me?" I intended, my lips inches away from hers. "Yes, this is what you want, right? You want me to talk to you like this when I fuck you like this baby? Tell me I know you do." Brown profound eyes, darting right into her soul as she hesitates to choose which action to make, panting or moaning her heart out of the pleasurable feeling of me penetrating her swollen pussy. Her grip was so strong I couldn't help but moan to her embrace on it.
Her eyes were in such worry yet, smiling like a complete slut at my weakness. Her right hand on my neck, resisting herself to combust from me. “Keep talking like that and I swear I’ll cum all on you.”
“Do it, mark all the things that belong to you. Mark your territory baby, cum on my dick.” I intended, deepening my penetration to hit her where it hurts.
Her head was sunken into the pillow and her hand that existed on my neck soon felt her body. Rushing hands, all on her breast. Generously squeezing her nipple to the stimulation, god it was all my fault she acted this way with me. Her luscious lips were soon bitten. I could tell she was starting to feel her climax.
“I…I can’t…Ryohei…” She moaned, arching her back leaving me to slide my hand under. Obtaining her close, I departed subtle kisses on her neck down to her chest.
“Do everything on me. Like I said before, show me how much of a slut I turned you into.” I groaned, maneuvering my head to her deprived breasts, brushing her finger away to allow placement of my tongue on her nipples. Sucking passionately, I offered her soft bites to signify my admiration to her breast instead of just her pussy and her lips. And so, just when I thought this session would last for a while longer, I winced at myself gaining a strong sense of sensitivity. “Tell me where you want me to cum mama, give me what you want.”
She panted, “No, no don’t do it yet, please. I wanna keep going please, don’t stop Ryohei please.”
I awed, “I’m making you feel good, aren’t I? You want more of me huh?”
“S-Shut up.”
“Shut up? Mama think before you speak. You said you love everything I’m doing, right?” I taunted, pulling out of her. “You told me to ruin you, don’t take back anything.”
“R-Ryohei why did you-”
She found herself on top of me again, this time her eyes darting to the ceiling. My grip, so profound, and down on the stands of her hair, her back arched to the tension. Devouring, her needy pussy embracing my dick made my body rush with nerves. God, I’d loved to watch her fuck me if we placed mirrors on the ceiling. Observing her face full of pain from my thrusts, her perky nipples all alone likewise yet the hypnotic bouncing would be such a movie I’d reminisce every single fucking day.
“Lose yourself to me Y/N, let me be the only one to see you like this. I wanna be the only one to make you this filthy.”
The exertion she had was overwhelming mine, I felt depleted to where I lost grasp of her hair. She sensed me discharging, “Amor, please. Don’t stop please, let me help you.” She pleaded, going on all fours. “I need you.”
The minute she slid up, I directly jerked up from the sensation on my tip. Yet, she never left that spot. I worshiped every moment, her pussy fucking my tip knowing damn well she desired for me to cum.
“You want it inside you mama? Advise me.” I demanded, seizing her arms and bearing them back aggressively, gasping on her back. “Let me do it inside you, let me cum inside you.”
“Do it then Ryohei, let it out please.”
“Y/N, I'm starting to...W-Wait I feel it.”
My eyes latched, throwing my head back as I moaned as loud with all the strength I still had.
Yet, this feeling only grew stronger.
Grasping my hair, I couldn’t help to sustain my body from all this pleasure.
But, once I opened my eyes. Her beautiful eyes were met with mine, but her mouth was full of me.
“I thought…I thought I came inside you….” I huffed, wincing at her subtly licking me.
“You really did lose yourself." She giggled, following her tongue down my shaft.
“Fuck,” I huffed, “You're an evil woman y’know?”
“Yeah, you know I love you right?”
“Uh-huh”
Her tongue had found a home on my dick, licking my hardened tip as she motionlessly kept her gaze on me. “Good, I want you to remember that.” She grinned, spitting on it as she watched me jolt up again.
“Y-Y/N!?…” Whines, the pain yet pleasure filled my soul. Seizing her hair, I forcefully fucked myself into her filthy mouth for a moment. “That’s what you wanted huh? All of me in your mouth right like this?”
Her soft giggles flew in the air, “Yeah, it seems like you wanted it more than me.”
I soon hauled her up to my face, kissing her passionately as I released her from my grasp.
Once again, she got on top of me but soon began wrapping the covers on us. “I love you.”
“I love you too.” I spoke, caressing her in my arms as I kissed her forehead. “God, you took everything outta me.”
As we snuggled in each other’s arms, it went silent. Taking in this void of quietness, my lips soon parted those soft, heavenly words of...
“Hani, I forgot to tell you once you got home...Happy Valentine’s Day.♥︎"
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dejatiny · 8 months ago
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I was tagged by @vesvosmozhno thanks!!!
who is your favorite group(s)?
Ateez, seventeen, bts, stray kids, txt, monsta x, blackpink, the boyz, p1harmony
when did you discover them?
Blackpink-2022
Bts, seventeen, ateez, stray kids, txt-2023
The boyz, p1harmony, Monsta x-2024
which member sparked your interest?
Blackpink-Rosé
Bts-Jin
Svt-S.Coups
Ateez-San
Skz-Bang Chan
Txt-Soobin
Tbyz-Sangyeon
P1h-Keeho
Monsta x-Shownu
who was your first bias?
Blackpink-Rosé
Bts-Yoongi
Svt-Hoshi
Ateez-Mingi
Skz-Bang Chan
Txt-Soobin
Tbyz-Sangyeon
P1h-Keeho
Monsta x-Hyungwon
who is your current bias?
Blackpink-Rosé
Bts- Yoongi
Svt- Hoshi
Ateez-Mingi
Skz- Bang Chan
Txt-Soobin
Tbyz-Sangyeon
P1h- Keeho
Monsta x-Hyungwon
why are they your current bias? (short ver.)
Blackpink-idk she's pretty lol(screams in bisexual)
Bts-CAUSE HES MY SOULMATE
Svt-fellow tiger enthusiast lol
Ateez-he my boo he my bae
Skz-its the accent for me
Txt-cutie
Tbyz- he looks like an actor I'm also into
P1h-hottie
Monsta x-meme king
why are they your current bias? (longer ver.)
Blackpink- honestly again she's pretty!!!! And I liked her outfits in the music vids lol
Bts-oh boy, where do I begin? I'll try to make this shortish, lol. We are both Pisces!!! We have a lot of the same mannerisms, like a lot. And we are into some of the same things. Were the same person. He's my soulmate! We both have shoulder injuries. Listen, I could go on and on, but I won't.
Svt-He's absolutely insane and I love him for it, haha. Both are obsessed with tigers!! Horanghae!!!!! Yes, he has an amazing body, but God damn its his adorable freaking face that I'm obsessed with!!!! We are both 5 stage clingers, lol. Both introverts
Ateez- Mr. FIX ON!! I absolutely adore Mingi!! He's such a complete goober, but he's also smart. That's a big turn-on!!! We both suffer from anxiety. Again, hottie with a body!!! He tall dorito man, and im a sucker for that!!!! Listen, that man was hot from the beginning y'all where just sleeping on the man!!! Could also be my soulmate!! I feel like we're the same person sometimes!
Skz- again, honestly, it's the accent and his personality, plus he's hot, so there's that as well, lol
Txt-he's so freaking adorable, I can't!!! I just want to cuddle him and feed him snacks!!!
Tbyz-yeah, he looks like an actor I like, and that's kinda what started it, lol. He also has a body, lol. He's so cute!!!!!
P1h- im still just getting into these guys, but he's the one that has standed out the most for me, lol.
Monsta x- MR. MEME KING!!! Also, tall dorito shape man, absolute goober!
who is your bias wrecker
Bts- Jk
Svt- S.Coups
Ateez- JEONG YUNHO!!!!!
Tbyz-Eric
P1h-Intak
Monsta x- Shownu
which members are you currently obsessing over that aren't your bias/bias wrecker?
Bts-Hobi
Svt- Dk, Mingyu, DINO
Ateez- all of them lez B honest
what are some of your favorite songs by this group?
Blackpink- how you like that, ice cream, crazy over you, boombayah, pink venom, shut down
Bts-run bts, butter, mikrokosmos, black swan, dna,DNA, mic drop, euphoria
Svt- spider, cheers, call call call, darling, I don't understand but I love you, left & right, chang up, clap, HOT, DON QUIXOTE, shadow, crush, God of music, monster, fighting, ruby, wait
Ateez- all of thier music really but i guess....rocky, take me home, dreamers, say my name, utopia, wonderland, thanxx,thanks, inception, not okay, days, halazia, win, im the one, hala hala, wave, stay, answer, sector 1, cyberpunk, guerilla, BOUNCY, celebrate, turbulence, the real, we know, emergency, Crazy Form, arriba, silver light, dreamy day, matz, it's you, YOUTH, everything
Skz-mirror, DOMINO (I NEED TO LISTEN TO MORE OMG)
Txt-anti-romantic, ice cream, CROWN, blue hour, chasing that feeling, happy ever after, magic, back for more, do it like that
Tbyz-bloom bloom, lip gloss, watch it, rat in a trap, honey, delicious,
P1h- scared, do it like this, siren, fall in love again, gotta get back, jump, back down, killin' it, latw night calls
Monsta x-who do you love, tied to your body, it ain't over, love me a little (I just started liking them so that's all I know lol)
have you ever been to one of their concerts
No but I hope to
Tagging:whomever wants to do this!!!
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stray-kaz · 9 months ago
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Time : a Jeong Jin-man x f!reader oneshot
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Anon request: a fic in which there is an age gap. So Jin-man is approximately 40ish and reader is 30.
Summary: Ji-an has moved out to live on her own, and suddenly, finally, there is time for you and Jin-man to be alone.
NSFW
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The house was empty. An empty nest. You quietly closed Ji-an's bedroom door and went to sit on the couch beside her uncle, tapping your empty hands on your knees. From his position lying on his back, he prodded you with his foot, one interested eyebrow risen.
"You okay?" he asked, still pressing his toes into your thigh.
"Yes" you sighed. "She's really gone."
Jin-man smiled slowly, and after five years with that slow smile, it still did a little something to your heart.
"She's really gone" he repeated. "But not that far. You missing her already?"
You nodded.
"I'm still here" he reminded you, and you glanced heavily at him.
"I know that" you replied dryly. "How could I forget that?"
He snorted and you stood up, dislodging his foot from your leg. He tsked and reached out to snag your wrist, reeling you back and tugging you to sprawl on top of him, your head thumping onto his chest.
"Honey, honey" he murmured, stroking your hair. "I'm still here. Stay with me."
You stretched out along the length of him, bare feet pushing along his denim clad calves, pressing your head up beneath his chin.
"Oh, fine" you grumbled.
Jin-man huffed a laugh and smoothed a hand up and down your back, pausing to stroke circles onto the bare skin he could suddenly feel when your t-shirt rode up under his touch. He continued to do it as he could feel the hum building in your chest, vibrating against his own. He felt you shift to press closer, head turned so your lips pressed gently to the side of his neck.
"So now we have this house to ourselves" you mumbled, content. "What's on your mind? What do you want to do, handsome?"
"Kiss you" Jin-man mumbled back. "Without the kid making noises about it."
He imitated Ji-an's disgusted reactions with pinpoint accuracy and you laughed, burying your face in his neck.
"Let me think about it..." you muffled against his skin.
You hesitated, pretending to think, and he hummed, waiting, watching you through half open eyes.
"Honey..."
He felt your grin against his skin and then your hands pressing into his chest as you levered yourself up to find his gaze. You leaned in to brush your lips against his and his whole body melted under yours, one big hand coming to rest on the back of your head, holding you gently in place.
His other hand snuck up the back of your t-shirt, oversized and drooping off your shoulders, and splayed wide between your shoulder blades; you shivered closer to him and he nudged your lips a little wider, inviting himself in. Heat flooded you, sinking lower and lower, until your hips twitched over him.
Jin-man pulled his head back a bit and eyed you closely, eyebrows lifting slightly. You froze and averted your gaze, but he gently tilted your head back around with two fingers under your chin.
"The kid isn't here, honey" he said quietly. "We can do whatever we want, wherever we want to do it. Just say the word."
He was staring so intently at you that you could feel it in your toes, and they curled against his calves as you drew one leg up slowly, nocking it against his blunt hip.
"Jin-man" you murmured, tracing his mouth with the tip of one finger. "I love you."
He smiled and tiny lines fanned out from the corners of his brown eyes.
"That'll do, honey" he said softly. "Now up, up, up."
He tugged you up nearer and kissed you again, the hand that had been resting on the back of your head now lowered to grasp your hip, long fingers pressing against your thigh.
In the back of your mind floated the reminder that you were on the couch in the living room, not your bed, but with his strong body underneath yours and his hands on your body, you couldn't bring yourself to care. But he seemed to read your mind, gently withdrawing.
"I think the bed would be easier on both of us, right?" he asked, starting to grin.
You rolled your eyes and fumbled off him to stand up, yelping when he yanked down your sweats in one quick tug, grabbing your waist to keep you from falling. You glowered over your shoulder at him, but he just chuckled and held you steady while you stepped out of them properly.
"Don't look at me like that" he murmured. "Couldn't help it."
Jin-man stood up and you turned round to face him, stretching up onto your toes to be able to reach his mouth again, sighing when his arms wrapped right around your back, arching it slightly as he bent to meet you, your right leg slotting in between his.
He started to walk you backwards, keeping clear of the low coffee table and any other obstacles he knew you were likely to fall over with your eyes shut. He could make his way through the house in the pitch dark, but you were not as able.
But even so, you stumbled into a wall, one of his hands coming up to catch the back of your head before it slammed hard. You mumbled a thank you against his lips and he grinned, just shaking his head. He trailed his lips down your jaw to the line of your neck, appreciating the way you arched it for him, giving him clean access to your sweet spots.
"What would you do without me?" he spoke into your skin, lightly grazing his teeth over your pulse.
You bit back a gasp and dug your hands into the backs of his shoulders, the fabric of his shirt wrinkling under your grip. He carefully slid his hand away from your head and shrugged out of his flannel before taking a small step away and pulling his t-shirt off over his head as well, giving no thought to his old scars as you reached for him to drag him back, running your hands all over his newly exposed skin.
"Be very, very sad" you mumbled, ignoring the quiet twinge of pain that ached at the back of your mind at the thought of it.
Jin-man held your head gently between his hands and kissed your forehead.
"I'm not going anywhere" he assured you, although there was also a soft voice in the back of his mind that said that may not be quite truthful.
He shoved it back on its dusty shelf and tipped your chin up to kiss you once more, watching your eyes flutter shut before he closed his, too. He soothes his hands down your sides, fingers drawing circles on your thighs, before resting lightly on your ass. Pressing you further back onto the wall, you felt his hips lean on yours and the persistent hardness of him nudging against you.
You stopped kissing him to look up, a little flushed, a little dazed, into dark eyes so warm you felt you could have melted on the spot. You arched up and rubbed lightly against him; he dug his teeth into his bottom lip and you smiled, enjoying the friction.
"You're sure you've got it in you, old man?" you murmured cheekily.
Jin-man rolled those beautiful eyes and playfully tapped your butt. This happened right before he lifted you clear off the ground with a shriek, wrapping your legs high around his waist. He pressed a nuzzling kiss between your breasts before blinking up at you, smiling.
"How's that for old man?" he retorted, eyebrows raised.
You grinned and squeezed him between your thighs.
"Pretty good, handsome."
He turned you away from the wall and carried you into the bedroom, letting you drop onto the bed when you were ready. He rubbed his hands up under your oversized t-shirt and lifted it over your head, his eyes darkening when he saw no bra, nipples already stiff and aching to be touched.
"Honey?" he murmured, his gaze flickering between your eyes and your breasts.
Your nod was all he needed before he pushed forward, warm wet mouth enveloping one nipple while his fingers lifted to tease the other. Liquid heat pooled between your thighs and you rubbed them together as your own hands rose to bury themselves in the thick of his dark hair, tugging rhythmically in time with his tongue.
He listened to the whimpers and gasps falling from your mouth, music to his ears. One hand lowered from his head to massage and push at his shoulder. Jin-man raised his eyes to you and nodded slowly, his teeth scraping lightly over sensitive flesh and making you jump. Then his free hand gently pressed between your legs and your thighs twitched apart to make room for his rough, practiced fingers to rub at you through your damp underwear.
"Honey, what do you want?" he murmured, straightening to press his lips between your eyebrows.
You pushed hastily off your knees and stood unsteadily on the bed to push your underwear down your legs, kicking them off over your feet. Then you knelt back down and wrapped your arms around Jin-man's shoulders to prepare, pushing your knees down hard into the mattress. He felt you trembling in anticipation and smiled as he trailed his fingers up the inside of your thigh to tease over you, warm and light.
You whimpered quietly into his shoulder and he shushed you gently as he slowly eased a long finger into you, moaning a little at the feel and tightness, quickly giving you a second and sucking in his breath as you worked down against his fingers, breathing hard over his skin.
"You okay?" he panted, knocking his head gently against yours.
You nodded and he began slowly pumping in and out of you while you clung to him, his thumb slowly pressing circles over your clit, feeling you rock your hips, humming quietly to you.
It was slow and steady when the wave took you under, leaving you to quake and catch your breath, strong arms holding you up against a steady, familiar chest. Jin-man stroked your hair and slowly started to move you up the bed, leaning you down until you rested on your back, eyelids flickering as you looked up at him, quivering thighs dropping open.
"Hey..." you mumbled, reaching out for him. "Get down here."
He grinned and kissed you gently, but you tugged and pulled at him until he was laughing and kissing you harder, both hands pressing into the duvet either side of your head. His hips dropped suddenly and you both groaned, two extra annoying layers still separating you.
"Come on" you complained.
Jin-man huffed a laugh as he watched your hands reach down to the zip on his jeans and drag it down after thumbing the button open. You shoved unceremoniously, impatiently at the denim, until he took pity on you and got them all the way off, followed by his underwear. His smile warmed when you wriggled a little ways closer down to him, your legs open for him.
He leaned over you and grabbed a pillow, pushing it under your hips to prop them up. You bit your lip and watched him through lowered eyelids, buzzing with the knowledge that this was going to feel good.
You pressed your hand over your open mouth when he finally inched inside, big hands gripping your hips to keep them still; he knew you too well, knew you would start humping up before you'd adjusted. You pouted at him and he leaned down to kiss you, receiving a high pitched moan for his troubles as the changed angle sank him the rest of the way in.
"Cheat!" he panted, groaning and pressing his forehead into your shoulder.
"Slowpoke!" you groused back, grinning dazedly as you stretched and tightened your muscles around him.
Jin-man shook his head, thrusting shallowly, shutting you up with such ease it was almost embarrassing. If only you cared to be embarrassed.
"First old man and then slowpoke" he muttered, kissing the delicate shell of your ear. "Anything else, honey?"
You nodded, eyes mostly closed as he watched you enjoy him.
"Yeah" you murmured. "Lover."
He softened and kissed you again, swallowing your little gasps of pleasure as he rocked slowly into you, deep, deeper, deeper still.
Mercenary. Killer. Lover.
"I love you" he rasped a whisper, pressing his face against your neck.
"Mmm" you mumbled.
He lifted away to look down at your face, saw your lazy smile and blown out eyes. He kissed between your eyebrows again.
"So satisfied" he said softly. "Okay, honey?"
"Yes, handsome."
You yawned and he laughed, pushing into you a little harder.
"Tired?"
You shook your head, but he didn't believe you. Nudging his nose against yours, he smiled.
"Jin-man, I love you" you murmured. "Jeong Jin-man, Jeong Jin-man, Jeong Jin-man, mine, mine, mine."
You clamped around him and he grunted, picking up his pace a little, but still so deep.
"Yours, yours, yours" he agreed. "Honey, honey, honey."
Your breathing picked up and your eyes flew open at the fairy light touch on your still sensitive clit, staring down at his fingers lovingly playing with you. His dark eyes were wide, his teeth digging into his lower lip.
"I'm close" he warned you. "Come for me, honey."
His sensitive tip pressed deep inside you kissed against the soft spot he craved and his fingers rubbed and swirled over your bundle of nerves, and you did happily as he wanted, back arching and inner muscles sucking him in so hard he cried out and came, hard and panting into you, sweat slicking his hair to his forehead.
You wrapped your arms and legs around him and turned your head to press kisses to his warm cheek. He slowly pulled out and slumped beside you, rolling to his side and soothing a hand over your stomach.
You wriggled off the pillow and cuddled closer to him, picking his hand up and playing with his fingers.
"I like having time" you said quietly.
"Oh, honey, me, too."
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Tagging: @writingmysanity
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whimsimille · 5 months ago
Text
THICKER THAN BLOOD
Chapter 3: Cherry Blossoms
Jeong Jin-Man x Reader!
Ensuring the cold steel pin snapped back into the slide with a click? Check. Carefully inspecting the barrel, the recoil spring, and guide? Check. Examining the magazine, the safety mechanism, and the trigger, testing each one to guarantee they were functioning at their optimal level? Check.
“Yeah... I still got that," you murmur to yourself, the words barely audible over the soft crackling of the vintage radio playing a forgotten tune from the 60s in the background: Cherry Blossom Ending. Mom’s favorite. 
Taking another long drag of your cigarette, you savor the rich taste of a blend of Turkish tobacco that Pasin introduced you to.
Exhaling a cloud of smoke, you watch it drift upwards lazily before dissipating into the stale air of the room. The sight brings back memories of foggy winter mornings back home, when the world seemed shrouded in a blanket of mist. But, unlike those mornings, there's no fragrance of dew-kissed roses or the sweet scent of mom's freshly baked apple pie to erase your nose scrunching—not when this place smells like a battlefield. The distinct aroma of gunpowder and the sharp tang of sweat mix in the air like a witch's potion, creating an unsettling olfactory cocktail.
Your eyes fall on the poster of an old concessionary you once visited, featuring a sexualized pit girl with improbably large breasts for her leather crop top. You sigh. No amount of decoration, no matter how weird or random, can erase the sensation that men in tactical gear might spring up through the gun stock’s door any minute. In your mind’s eye, they empty all the shelves as they run, their gazes wild with bloodlust, chins coated with saliva as the drugs they took to make them more alert take hold of their minds.
Yet, amidst the chaos, your eyes notice the old wooden table, scarred with years of use and abuse. Its familiar creaking sound, especially from the third leg, the one that always needed fixing. Despite its oddities, this place has a certain charm.
As a woman, you know that there are environments that society still judges as masculine. But whether you want it or not, whether you identify as a feminist or not, these judgments don't matter to you. 
Whilst memories flood back—your father patiently teaching you how to shoot, your mother cheering you on at the shooting competition—you can't help but listen to the echoes of your parents amidst the gunpowder. The rusty corner nearby the Glocks shelves reminds you too much of your old house, of mom and dad dancing across it the way they used to on Saturday nights, their laughter filling the room. Even the leftover smell of Gun's piss on the floor brings back how Honda brought home that forsaken cat that you've learned to love. 
These memories remind you that this has nothing to do with being feminine or masculine. This is about being you.
Suddenly, your phone vibrated, breaking your shitty reverie. It was a muffled sound by the work table, buried somewhere beneath the scattered assortment of guns—pistols, rifles, and shotguns—in your twin's meticulously disordered workplace.
Discarding your half-smoked baby into the overflowing ashtray, you slowly rise from the creaky stool, stretching your stiff muscles. A dull ache radiates from your lower back—the result of countless hours spent hunched over the workbench. 
Ignoring the discomfort, you navigate through the maze of scattered tools and disassembled machinery, your boots echoing against the concrete floor, until you reach for the incessantly vibrating device under a pile of blueprints.
You lean against the graffiti and poster-covered wall, its coldness seeping through your top. Your gaze drifts to the multiple monitors displaying the gradually emptying streets of Seoul, illuminated by the neon glow of streetlights.
Honda always had an obsession with surveillance, with keeping an eye on every single movement outside. 
To the uninitiated, it might come off as paranoia. But in your line of work, it was a necessity. The last thing you both needed was someone sniffing around your... less-than-legal activities.
You swipe the screen, bringing the encrypted chat to life.
Younger brother by 6 minutes:
Hey, sis! Just checking in.
I trust Sukku's client came to pick up his custom order—the modified Glock 19? Did he give any trouble? Notice anything out of the ordinary? Are there any signs of suspicion that we might need to worry about?
Considering the late hour and the fact that you've been alone in this place all evening, do you want me to swing by? Gunpowder is already fast asleep. I took her to the vet earlier. They think it might be chlamydia. Apparently, it's a thing in cats.
Big sister by 6 minutes:
Chlamydia? In a cat? That's news to me. Is she going to be okay? Will she need any special treatment?
As for the client, there are no issues whatsoever. He seemed satisfied with the custom Glock. Even complimented the grip modifications.
And don't worry about me. I'm used to the workshop without you by now. Besides, I’ve been productive. Uploaded a few of our modified guns and encryption codes on our site for our initial clients to browse.
I also completed a thorough maintenance check on the old Sig Sauer P226. Replaced the recoil spring, cleaned the firing pin and even polished the slide rails. It's as good as new now. You know, just in case we need some extra firepower.
But yeah, if you're free and not too worn out, do swing by. We can grab a late-night snack from the 24-hour joint down the street. Their kimchi jjigae has been on my mind.
But for now, don't rush. I'm fine on my own. I will keep the place locked down and secure until you get back. It's not like we have a shortage of security systems.
And tell Gunpowder her noona got her back. And ask her to keep her paws off my toolbox.
Watching the gray bubble with your message pop up on the screen, you hit send.
Just as you were about to pull up the Murthehelp site on your phone—the one you had coded from scratch after many long, caffeine-fueled nights—a sudden flicker on one of the large monitors caught your attention. You squinted, setting your phone down on the table.
There, in the grainy black-and-white footage, you could make out a figure. It was vague and blurry, moving in the shadows, but their height and gait unmistakably suggested a man.
He was coming towards the workshop, his path unwavering and purposeful. You quickly glanced at his attire—a dark jacket and a baseball hat pulled low over his face. Not exactly the outfit of someone who was just strolling by, especially not at this late hour when even the nocturnal creatures had retreated to their burrows.
Keeping your nerve, you reached for the console, fingers nimbly dancing over the buttons to turn off the monitors. You didn't want the soft blue glow of the screens to betray your presence in the otherwise dark room. 
Leaving the gun stock downstairs, you entered the quiet workshop, the smell of oil and metal heavy in the air.
After tiptoeing towards the reinforced steel door, you hid behind a towering metal shelf cluttered with an assortment of spare parts, rusted tools, and half-assembled machinery, their metallic sheen glinting dimly in the ambient light.
The silence hung heavy, broken only by the steady tick-tock of an old clock on the wall. Your heart pounded in your chest as you braced yourself for a loud bang, anticipating a forceful break-in. But instead, the soft rustle of someone kneeling near the entrance reached your ears. The muffled clicks of a lock being picked followed and then the door was gently pushed up, its usual creak betraying its motion conspicuously absent.
The moment the man stepped in, you sprang into action and the workshop transformed into a battleground.
You dove under a swing. A wrench grazed your arm—a missed punch. You retaliated with a swift kick, watching as he stumbled back, barely keeping his balance. But despite your best efforts, your back soon hit the cold metal of an old car under repair.
Cornered, with no way out.
A thin ray of light from a partially opened window cut through the darkness, casting long, distorted shadows. As your eyes adjusted, you saw him—Jinman. His face was as cold as the winter wind, revealing nothing of his intent. He held a knife in his hand, the cold steel pressing ominously against your stomach.
"Complacency could get you killed," he admonished as he tossed his baseball cap somewhere in this place. "In Babylon, I trained you to be sharper, faster, but you've let yourself grow soft. One inch to the side, and this blade could have nicked an artery. It would've been a messy end."
“Damn you, Jinman! What the hell were you thinking, barging in here like some low life thug?" Your hand instinctively went to your side, where your trusty Smith & Wesson lay as you watched through hooded eyes as he leaned against you, his nose scrunching in what might be the unique signal of pain from your attacks. “I mistook you for some gangster trying to get a hand on our stash! I could've shot you, you reckless idiot!" You pushed his hand away, stepping out of the claustrophobic corner.
“Do you remember our lesson on critical injuries?”
"The intestine, when damaged, can lead to sepsis," you replied, his voice flat, your eyes never leaving his as he begrudgingly sheathed his knife. You quirked up an eyebrow as you saw blood under his nails, but you didn’t dare say a thing, you knew he wouldn't talk about it anyway. Jeong was stubborn like that.
"And if left untreated, the mortality rate is high, even with immediate medical attention.”
Ignoring his continued lecturing, you moved past him, heading towards the narrow staircase that led back to the lower level where the gun stock was kept. He trailed behind, his usually light steps now heavy and labored.
"So, care to explain your sudden, unannounced break-in, Jinman?" You questioned, the cool air from the underground level hitting your face like a welcome reprieve. Without waiting for his response, you kept talking, "And why the sudden interest in giving me a lecture on gut wounds? Planning on stabbing my twin next?
"Because you..." he began, but his voice trailed off, replaced by a pained grunt.
Alarmed, you turned around just in time to see him stumble, clutching his side. He landed heavily on the last few steps, letting out a string of curses.
"Jinman?" you called out, rushing over to him. "What's wrong?"
His response was a mere groan, his face a sickly pale hue contrasted by the cold sweat forming on his forehead. The hole in his shirt as he shed his coat could be a smudge of dirt from his shoveling chore, and the blood that has soaked his shirt is almost invisible in the dim light. He's now making a strange whistling noise each time he inhales. He'd been shot. Near his intestines.
"Oh, God, Jinman! This... this is serious," you stammered, your hand shaking as you reached out to check his wound.
You have seen injuries before. Gunshot wounds, stabbings, broken bones are occupational hazards that come with your line of work. But seeing Jinman, your former partner and mentor from Babylon, bleeding and weakening struck a nerve. A sudden adrenaline rush surged through you, coupled with a rising protective instinct. You had to act quickly, keep your wits about you. Panic wouldn't help either of you now.
"Alright, Ahjussi," you said, forcing a steady tone into your voice. "We need to get you lying down. Now."
He lets go, or maybe just loses the strength to hold on, as you maneuver him onto a makeshift bed—a heap of old, worn-out blankets and tarps that you usually use when working on cars. You pull back a little—not far. His eyes regard you from their deep and blackening sockets. They are as brilliant as ever, but you see, they are also full of terror and (this is what frightens you most) some wretched, inexplicable amusement. 
Still speaking low—perhaps so only you can hear, maybe because it's the best he can manage—Jeong says, "Listen, little woman. I can handle myself.."
 "No—you have to stop."
He pays no attention. He draws in another of those screaming breaths, purses his wet red lips in a tight O, and makes a low, incredibly nasty chuffing noise. It drives a fine spray of blood up his clenched throat and into the sweltering air.
He turns his head to the side, spits a wad of half-congealed blood onto the hot tar, then turns back to you. "I guess it's karma.”
You understand that he means it, and for a moment (surely it is the power of his eyes), you believe it's true. He will make the sound again, only a little louder, and in some other world, Bale, that lord of sleepless nights, will turn its unspeakable, hungry head. A moment later, if you don’t just move and fucking think, in this world, Jeong Jin-Man will simply shiver in this old place and die. The death certificate will say something sane, but you’ll know: his dark past finally saw him, came for him and ate him alive.
“I guess I’m getting old, huh?”
Leaning even closer. Into the shivering sweat and blood of him. Leaning in until you can smell the last palest ghost of the Prell he shampooed with that morning and the Foamy he shaved with. Leaning in until your lips touch his ear. You whisper, "Be quiet, Jin-Man. For once in your life, just be quiet. Don’t you dare make this pussy sound again.”
Looking around, you knew no bandage in your medicine cabinet would be enough, so you ended up tearing long strips from a sheet. The sheet is old, but you mourn its passing just the same—on a waitress's salary (supplemented by niggardly tips and only slightly better ones from the faculty members who lunch at Pat's), you can ill afford to raid your linen closet. But when you think of  stuffing it into his mouth to muffle his screams and grunts, you don't hesitate.
You caught sight of an old bottle of Korean whisky, a forgotten souvenir from a past mission to Jeju Island. Honda had won it in a high-stakes game of poker but never got around to finishing it. Now, it seemed like a fitting antiseptic.
Raising the bottle to your lips, you took a swig, the liquid burning its way down your throat—a twisted semblance of courage. Then, with a grimace, you drenched the wound with the help of a cloth, the sharp smell of alcohol mingling with the raw scent of blood. Jinman’s body tensed, a deep groan escaping his clenched teeth.
“I’m hot.”
"Shit, Ahjusshi." Emboldened, you rubbed your freezing, leaking hand along his right cheek, his left cheek, and then across his forehead, where drops of whisky-colored water dripped into his eyebrows and then ran down the sides of his nose. He hums in satisfaction. "You should have been more careful."
The room was filled with a heavy silence, the only sounds being the occasional drip of water from a leaky pipe somewhere overhead and Jinman’s labored breathing.
You remembered a mission in Gwangju, back when you two were still new to the field. It was a stormy night, the air was so heavy with rain that it felt like you were walking through a cloud. The neon lights of the city were blurred, painting everything in an ethereal glow. There was a sense of surrealism to that night, a feeling of being detached from reality. That was the first time you had seen Jinman truly vulnerable, his usually stoic demeanor giving way to panic as a bullet grazed his shoulder.
“It’s just a scratch,” he had grumbled, his hand tightly gripping yours as you tried to clean the wound. He licked at his lips. You saw the blood on his tongue and it turned your stomach, but you didn’t pull away from him.
Now, years later, history is repeating itself. But this time, the stakes were much higher.
"Listen to me, old man," you began, your voice breaking the overwhelming silence. "We've been through worse, haven't we? Remember that time in Busan when that crazy bastard tried to stab you with a switchblade?"
A ghost of a smile tugged at his lips, his eyes half-closed, the sheets between his teeth stained with blood and saliva. "Yeah, and you broke his nose."
"You're damn right, I did," you chuckled, your fingers gently tracing the outline of the wound, assessing the damage, before rising up again in search of your purple lighter somewhere in this place. "And we made it through that night, didn't we? So, we're going to make it through this shit too. But you need to stay with me, alright? Don't you fucking dare drift off on me!"
Found it!
As you kneeled again and prepared the needles and threads, sterilizing them over a small flame, your throat felt as dry as the barren lands of the Mojave Desert. Words stuck in your mouth like cotton, but you forced them out. 
"Do you remember that pawnshop in Itaewon? The one with the old, rusted sign hanging crookedly and the fat, ginger cat named Tofu who would lazily sprawl across the counter? The owner—what was his name? Sungmin, right? He had this weird obsession with Elvis Presley. Used to play vintage vinyl records on that old gramophone he had all day long. You hated it; you said it was too 'old-fashioned' for your taste. But I caught you humming 'Love Me Tender' once."
His eyes met yours, a faint glimmer of amusement in them. You could see his chest rise and fall, each breath a little more labored than the last. But he was listening, a hint of a smile tugging at his bloodstained lips.
"And then there was that time in Hongdae," you continued, your fingers gently manipulating the sterilized pliers inside his abdomen. He hissed and jerked, the sudden movement causing the tools in your hand to clatter loudly. But a stern glance in his direction had him stilling, his jaw clenched tightly to suppress any further sounds. "We stumbled upon this cute little bakery at three in the morning. The owner was this old lady, who claimed her red bean buns were the best in all of Seoul. You were skeptical and said nothing could beat your grandma's recipe. But, after the first bite...”
You paused, recalling the look of sheer surprise on his face. "You devoured five of those buns in a matter of minutes. You even tried to flirt with the old lady, hoping to score the recipe."
A soft chuckle escaped his lips, his grip tightening around your free hand. "And she said... she said she had a... strict policy. No sharing recipes with… playboys."
"Exactly!" You exclaimed, a genuine smile spreading across your face as you noticed the mischievous light returning to his eyes. "She definitely put you in your place, didn't she?"
“Shut…up.”
“I like you too. Please don’t die on me. I don't want to hear Honda crying in my ears at your funeral.”
As you finally found the bullet, the harsh reality of the situation loomed over you, a grim reminder of the danger he was in. But for now, for just a few moments, it felt like old times. Just you and Jinman, bleeding wounds, guns on your feet and hips. You and him.
   --------------------------------------------------
The short walk from the taxi to Jin-Man’s porch had been enough to thoroughly drench you, with your clothes clinging uncomfortably to your skin. Raindrops dripped from the brim of your hat, splashing onto the porch's wooden planks, causing the aged wood to glisten under the feeble light from an old lamp hanging precariously above the door.
A sudden gust of wind made you shiver, and you quickly pulled your coat tighter around yourself, silently cursing the weather. You couldn't help but take a moment to observe the changes Jin-Man had made to the entrance—the broken lilies and the shattered pot had been replaced by beautiful blue hyacinths. You admired them briefly before bending down to retrieve the spare keys hidden beneath the ugly cat statue.
"Hey, ugly one! Been taking care of them for me?"
As you straightened up, key in hand, the door suddenly swung open.
Jin-Man stood in the doorway, his eyes softening as they took in your soaked floral skirt, the one he had always nagged you about, and the top that clung damply to your torso. He looked spent, with dark circles under his eyes and the distinct smell of ink and gunpowder clinging to him. The stubble on his face stood out more prominently against his tired features.
"I didn't think you'd come home.” Unusually, he started to balance on one foot while his hair was too long in the back—he needed it cut badly. You know he looks in the mirror and sees a Kpop star but you look at him and see a vagrant out of a Woody Guthrie song—dust in the wind.
What Jeong didn't say was, "Why didn’t you come in earlier?" Or, "Why do you look so hurt?"
As Honda had pointed out on more than one occasion, Jin-Man had what was surely among the rarest of human talents: he was a business minder who did not mind too much if you didn't mind yours. As long as you weren't making explosives to throw at someone, that was, and in your case, explosives were always a possibility. 
You shrugged off his remark; the tension between you two is still palpable. "I'm not here for you, Jin-Man," you replied, your gaze hardening. "I'm here for Ji-An."
Stepping past him, you entered the house, your gaze scanning the familiar surroundings—a mix of vintage and modern decor. Everything was just as you remembered it; the mahogany coffee table with its assortment of vintage car magazines, the worn-out, leather Chesterfield couch that bore the imprints of countless lazy afternoons, and the rustic brick fireplace that still smelled faintly of burnt cedar—the same furniture, the same arrangement, the same scents.
As you moved further into the house, a familiar sound reached your ears: the quiet jingling of a collar. Turning around, you saw Gunpowder padding towards you, her amber eyes glowing.
"G-Pow," you called, crouching down to her level, your hand reaching out to her.
The moment stretched uneasily as she mulled over your extended hand and her new master, standing a distance away. “Betrayal alert: Hostile territory,” seemed to be the message running through her kitty brain.
Just when you were about to etch another loss, Gunpowder decided otherwise; tail held in festive high, she padded towards you, meowing a soft welcome.
A chuckle rippled through you as your fingers slid behind her ears, playing briefly, "Missed all this mess, didn't you darling?”
Gunpowder meowed in response, her tail flicking playfully.
“My good girl.” You kissed her fur before she ran away to the couch.
Standing back up, you turned to face Jin-Man, your gaze hard but determined. "Is Ji-An asleep?"
He nodded, running a hand through his hair—a nervous habit you remembered well. "She's had a long day. But she'll be excited to see you in the morning."
"That's good," Bidding your drenched jacket and your hat goodbye onto the nearby coat rack, your eyes danced around the familiar kitchen layout till it landed on the kitchen counter, noticing the half-eaten sandwich and the glass of milk. "Eating habits are still the same, I see."
Jin-Man shrugged, his gaze avoiding yours. "Habit is a hard thing to break."
"You should try sometimes. It wouldn't kill you to have a proper meal."
His gaze finally met yours, a spark of defiance in his eyes. "I can take care of myself, Y/N."
You sighed, shaking your head slightly. "I know you can, Jin-Man. But taking care of yourself doesn't mean you have to do everything alone."
He didn't reply, his gaze dropping to the floor. You could almost see the wheels turning in his head; his mind was probably grappling with the fact that you were back in the house after months of absence.
Deciding to break the silence, you moved towards the kitchen, opening the fridge and scanning the contents. "I'll make dinner. It's about time we had a decent meal. And while I do that, could you fetch me some dry clothes? I'd prefer the black shirt with the Nirvana logo if it's still around.”
He sighed, closing the fridge door abruptly. “Stop it,” he demanded, his voice carrying that note that you hated so much. The note of a boss talking with his partner. “Stop thinking about me and go take a shower. You’re freezing, and no shirt, Nirvana or not, is going to help with that.”
"Okay, okay, bossy much?" You rolled your eyes as you moved past him, heading towards the doorway. "By the way, I'm not freezing. I'm just a little wet."
With a sense of nostalgia, you began to tread softly down the hallway, the familiar creak of the wooden floorboards echoing in your ears.
Gliding past Ji-An's room, you lightly pressed the door ajar. Bathed in the subdued glow of her nightlight was a picture-perfect scene—a tiny human swaddled in warmth, clutching onto her fluffy bunny with all the ferocity her little fists could offer. 
With feather-light steps, you ventured further in, pressing a gentle kiss on her forehead as whispers of "Goodnight, Noona" danced around your heartstrings.
Clutching your top hem, your mind began to drift back to the past as you continued down the hallway. The memories of nights you spent in this house were like a movie playing in your mind: the arguments filled with passion, the shared meals around the worn-out dining table, and the shared silence that spoke more than words ever could.
After Honda’s death, you hadn't wanted the slice of cheesecake he would bring home from the restaurant for dessert, and you certainly hadn't wanted to go to any Hollywood movie... but you had wanted all those things with Jin-Man. Yes. Because over the last couple of months, and especially over the last months, you’ve come to depend on him in a funny way. Maybe it's corny— probably—but there's a feeling of safety when he puts his arms around you that wasn't there with any of her other guys; what you felt with and for most of them was either impatience or wariness. (Sometimes fleeting lust.) 
But there is kindness in Jeong (hidden between the rusty corners and dark basement of his heart, but, yes, there was), and from the first you felt interest coming from him— interest in you—that you could hardly believe, because he's so much smarter and so talented. And he speaks a language you grasped greedily from the beginning. Not the signing language, but one you know very well, just the same—it's as if you were speaking it in dreams.
But what good is talk and a special language if there's no one to talk to? Someone to cry to, even? That's what you needed tonight. You’d never told him about your crazy fucked-up family or your past before him—oh, pardon me, that's crazy smucked-up talk in Honda's speech—but you meant to tonight. Felt you had to or explode from pure misery. 
Walking into the bathroom, its altered landscape consumed your attention. Pristine countertop occupied by practical necessities: a single toothbrush, tube of toothpaste, and straight razor aesthetically laying on top screamed 'functional' compared to it once being decorated chaotically with personal effects nestled among skincare bottles alongside makeup and a carelessly thrown hairbrush—an exquisite mosaic of a life once lived.
Stepping into the shower, the hot water cascaded down your body, washing away the grit and grime of the day. Still, no water could stop you from remembering the last time you were in this shower—the last time you were in this bathroom.
"Can I join you?" Jin-Man's voice had echoed off the bathroom tiles, the door creaking open slightly.
Looking back, you found him leaning against the door frame, sleep-ruffled hair visible over the frosted shower barrier—a low-hung towel only embellishing his irresistible nonchalance.
“If you promise not to fuck me against the tiles again, sure, why not?”
“Alright, alright,” he had chuckled, opening the shower door and stepping in. The water immediately started soaking his hair, the droplets trickling down his face and chest. “I promise, no fooling around.”
You had laughed then, tilting your head back to rinse the shampoo from your hair. “Good. Because I need to get ready, and I don’t have time for your… shenanigans.”
Jin-Man simply smiled at that, his hands reaching out to help rinse your hair. His fingers were gentle as they massaged your scalp, working through the tangles. “I’ll behave. Scout's honor.”
“You were never a scout,” you pointed out, rolling your eyes at his antics but not being able to suppress the smile that tugged at the corners of your mouth.
"But I could have been. Imagine how good I would have looked in the uniform."
You laughed at that, the sound echoing off the bathroom walls. "Yeah, right. You would have been the rebel scout. I can just see you now, trying to start a fire with a pocket knife and a piece of flint, and ‘accidentally’ burning down the entire camp because some weird boy thought it was funny to pull on my pigtails."
"Probably," he agreed. His hands moved to your shoulders, kneading the tense muscles there. "But I bet I would have been the best at telling ghost stories around the campfire."
"That's true. You do have a knack for dramatic storytelling. You could have scared all the other scouts half to death."
His hands stilled on your shoulders, and he pulled you closer, his chest pressing against your back. "I only scare people because I care," he murmured in your ear, his breath warming against your skin.
"Is that so?" You turned to face him, a soft smile on your lips, and you reached up to trace the line of his jaw. "Well, in that case, I guess I should be grateful."
"You should be. Now, let's get you rinsed off. We wouldn't want you to be late, now, would we?"
"No, we wouldn't.”
As you stepped out of the shower, you reached for the towel hanging on the rack.
Dressed in the Nirvana shirt and a pair of his boxers, you padded back into the kitchen, finding Jin-Man leaning against the counter with a mug of coffee in his hands. He looked up as you entered, his eyes automatically dropping to take in your attire. He said nothing, but you could see the flicker of something in his gaze—the ghost of a memory, perhaps.
His other friends saw his talent and were dazzled by it at first. You saw how he sometimes struggled to meet the eyes of strangers. You understood that, underneath all his smart (and sometimes brilliant) talk, in spite of his stern expressions, you could hurt him badly if you wanted to. He was, in your dad's words, cruising for a bruising. Had been his whole charmed smucking—no, check that—his whole charmed fucking life. Tonight, the charm could break. And who could break it? You could.
Any tension laying dormant was pushed aside as you reached into the refrigerator, selecting ingredients for tonight's culinary endeavor: crisp bok choy leaves, thick udon strands slightly sticky to touch, and leftover samgyeopsal marinated with sesame oil, which filled the air with a slightly charred meaty smell while cooking yesterday. The symphony of chopped vegetables thudding on a wooden cutting board, accompanied by a sizzling pan flanked by the soft purring of the refrigerator, announced another evening feast showtime.
Finally, you couldn't take it anymore.
“Stop staring and say something, Jin-Man.”
He blinked, his gaze lifting from the coffee mug in his hands to meet yours. “You look…”
“Don’t say it.”
“Okay.”
You let out a sigh of relief, turning back to the stove.
“I wasn’t going to say you look good.”
“No?”
"Nope," he said, maintaining eye contact while parking his well-loved first edition Penguin mug with a soft thud. "You've got this 'This is my kitchen' glow about you—no make-up, tousled midnight hair against your cheeks, and my shirt on your body... You look like you belong at home, in this kitchen, with me."
“Oh, shut up, Jinman. Are you sure that coffee isn't spiked? That cheap bag of Dong Suh you've been hoarding since you bought it from that old market in Gyeongju?"
He laughed then, a deep, rich sound that echoed warmly around the room, bouncing off the peeling sunflower-yellow wallpaper and the worn-out, wooden cabinets. "I promise, it's just regular coffee. But if you're not careful, I might start spouting poetry next.”
"I'd like to see you try," you challenged as you moved to add the noodles to the boiling pot.
At the same time, however, a soft melody began to fill the room. Turning, you saw Jinman’s back turned towards you. He was hunched over an old radio placed precariously on the window ledge over the sink—an old Philco with a cracked case. It had been his mother’s; he kept it out in the barn and listened to it while he was choring. It's the only thing of hers that he still has, and you keep it in the window because it's the only place where it will pick up local stations. It was secondhand even then, when Jin-Man gifted it to her after earning his first paycheck, but when it was unwrapped and she saw what it was, she grinned until it seemed her face would crack and how she thanked him! Over and over!
The tinny sound of the old device was playing a song that you recognized immediately—it was your mother's favorite song. A smile tugged at your lips as you watched him, his fingers delicately turning the knobs to get the best reception.
At the end, he cocked a thumb at the radio and said, stupidly proud of his useless knowledge, "That's Busker Busker. The original indie version."
"Jeong…I—”
You had no idea where to go from there, and it seemed there was no need. The man raised the forefinger of his left hand like a teacher who meant to make a particularly important point, and the smile actually resurfaced on his lips. Some sort of smile, anyway.
"Wait," he said.
"Wait?"
He looked pleased, as if you had grasped a difficult concept. "Wait."
And before you could say anything else, he simply walked off behind you, turning off the stove before his hands found your waist. His warm body pressed against your back, his head burying itself in the crook of your neck.
The aroma of your cooking, mixed with the familiar scent of Jin-Man and the sound of the old song playing on the radio, transported you back to simpler times. Times when life was not about surviving, not about fighting, but about living. About enjoying moments like these.
He began to sway, his movements leading you in a slow dance around the kitchen. His touch was gentle yet firm and you allowed him to lead, your body moving in rhythm with his as you danced barefoot on the cold ceramic tile floor.
Beyond the rustic kitchen windows, Mother Nature cooed her own ballad—soft chirps cushioned in cool country air under the moon's watchful eyes, dressing everything in stretched-out shadows—that played on repeat. Gunpowder was outside too busy bullying a moth under a moon-bathed silhouette, while Ji-An’s gentle snores added a comforting motif to your nighttime symphony.
It felt like you were in some sort of dream, the reality of your world forgotten for a moment. You were not a killer, not a fighter. You were just a woman, dancing in the kitchen with the man she secretly might like.
Turning you around, he looked down at you, his gaze soft and filled with emotions you could not decipher. Your heart pounded in your chest as you looked up at him through your eyelashes, your fingers idly playing with the hem of his worn-out puma shirt.
The world outside did not matter at this moment. The only thing that mattered was Jin-Man and the way he held you, the way he looked at you. You could see a mirror of your own emotions in his eyes—longing, fear, and a hint of sadness.
As the last note of the song played, you rose to your tiptoes, pressing a soft kiss to his lips. It was filled with promise, with hope—a kiss that said more than words ever could.
As you pulled away, you rested your head on his chest, listening to the steady rhythm of his heartbeat. His arms wrapped around you, holding you close as the two of you stood in the middle of the kitchen, the smell of your cooking still lingering in the air.
"Welcome home, Y/N," he whispered, his voice barely audible over the soft hum of the radio.
And for the first time in a long time, you felt like you belonged.
57 notes · View notes
jameui · 3 years ago
Text
MASTERLIST
LEGEND:
🧁 Fluff
🌶️ Angst
🍋 Smut
💀 Horror
ANIME
[not available yet. please wait until further notice]
TV SHOWS
[not available yet. please wait until further notice]
VIDEO GAMES
TEKKEN
Violet/Lee Chaolan
Sergei Dragonuv
Lars Alexandersson
Hwoarang
Kazuya Mishima
Jin Kazama
Forest Law
Geese Howard
Eddy Gordo
Claudio Serafino
Shaheen
Steve Fox
ACTORS
Lee Jongsuk
CUPCAKE SERVING {🌶️ |🍋 |🧁}
Jung Haein
Yoo Jingoo
Lee Dohyeon
Song Kang
LOVE FUCKS LIFE (SFAH CENTER) {🌶️}
Kim Soohyun
Kim Seonho
Lee Dongwook
Ahn Hyoseop
Woo Dohwan
Hwang Inyeop
Lee Jaewook
Bae Hyunsung
IDOLS
ATEEZ
Kim Hongjoong
NUDES {🌶️|🧁|🥭} (2 Parts)
Park Seonghwa
Jeong Yunho
MY FAVORITE HYUNG {🌶️|🧁}
Kang Yeosang
GUILTY MISTAKE {🧁|🌶️}
CRUSH (SFH CENTER) {🧁|🌶️}
Choi San
HOUSE VISIT {🧁|🍋}
NIGHTMARE {🍋|🌶️}
Song Mingi
MY BELOVED ANGEL {🌶️|🧁} (2 Parts)
Jung Wooyoung
FAILED SURPRISE {🌶️|🧁}
Choi Jongho
HOUSE VISIT {🧁|🍋}
STRAY KIDS
Bang Chan
Lee Minho
MISCHIEVOUS {🧁|🌶️|🍋} (? parts)
Seo Changbin
Hwang Hyunjin
THINKING OF YOU {🌶️ }
MOVIE DATE {🌶️ |🧁}
Han Jisung
Lee Felix
MY POSSESSION (SFAH CENTER) {🍋|🌶️}
Kim Seungmin
Yang Jeongin
BTS
Kim Seokjin
Min Yoongi
Jung Hoseok
Kim Namjoon
Park Jimin
Kim Taehyung
UNFORTUNATE FATE {🌶️|🍋|🧁}
Jeon Jungkook
UNFORTUNATE FATE {🌶️|🧁|🍋}
NCT
Lee Taeyong
Jeong Yoonoh/Jaehyun
SPECIAL PRESENT {🧁|🍋} (3 Parts)
Dong Sicheng/Winwin
Kim Jungwoo
BEST HERO (SFAH CENTER) {💀|🌶️}
Wong Yukhei/Lucas
ANGEL [🌶️|🧁]
HAPPIER WITH YOU [🧁|🌶️|🍋]
Lee Min Hyung/Mark
Xiao Dejun/Xiaojun
Huang Guanheng/Hendery
Lee Jeno
Na Jaemin
THE OLD MAN (SFAH CENTER) {💀}
Liu Yangyang
TXT
Choi Yeonjun
HAVE FUN {💀}
THE SKIRT (SFAH CENTER) {🍋|🧁}
THE SKIRT (LONGER VERSION) {🍋|🌶️|🧁}
Choi Soobin
ONCE A SPACE FILLER {🌶️|🧁}
MY HAPPINESS {🧁|🍋|🌶️} (2 PARTS)
Choi Beomgyu
A START OF SOMETHING GOOD (SFAH CENTER) {🌶️|🧁}
Kang Taehyun
Huening Kai
ENHYPEN
Lee Heeseung
ALL NIGHTER {🍋|🌶️|🧁}
CORRUPTION {🌶️}
MA BOY {🌶️|🧁}
Park Jongseong/Jay
COOKIES {🧁|🌶️}
CLIFFHANGER {🧁|🌶️}
BEGIN AGAIN {🌶️|🧁|🍋}
Sim Jaeyun/Jake
BOYS, BOYS, BOYS {🧁|🌶️|💀}
HERO {🌶️|🧁|🍋}
CLIFFHANGER {🧁|🌶️}
WE, ROLEPLAY {🍋}
CELESTE {🌶️}
SCHOOL RIVAL {🍋|🌶️|🧁}
Park Sunghoon
AN UNEXPECTED MEETING {🧁} (2 Parts)
RUSTED NAILS (SFAH CENTER) {🌶️|🧁}
CLIFFHANGER {🧁|🌶️}
WE, ROLEPLAY {🍋}
I GUESS I'M IN LOVE {🌶️|🧁} (INSTAGRAM AU)
Kim Sunwoo/Sunoo
ANTI-HERO {🌶️}
Yang Jungwon
INTRUDER (SFAH CENTER) {💀}
Nishimura Riki/Niki
ALL ALONE (SFAH CENTER) {🌶️|🧁}
OTHERS
THIS IS MY STORY ENDING (SFAH CENTER) {🌶️|🧁} [Thoma x Male Reader]
MY LITTLE SUNSHINE (SFAH CENTER) {🌶️|🧁} [Sundrop/Moondrop x Male Reader]
DISASTROUS {🌶️} [Multi Fanfiction]
* will be updated soon
429 notes · View notes
raplinesmoon · 3 years ago
Text
Love Hard (KNJ x F!Reader)
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Pairing: Kim Namjoon x F!Reader (ft. Jeong Jaehyun)
Genres: crack, fluff, slight angst
AUs: childhood acquaintances to lovers, fake dating AU
Word Count: 10.8k
Warnings: hidden identity, catfishing-adjacent behaviour, OC and Namjoon play themselves and each other and everyone around them, cursing, excessive drinking, drunkenness, Jin being lowkey shady, OC takes an edible, lots of soul-searching and self-discovery, Namjoon is very shy and insecure and sweet uwu
Ratings: R
Summary: After reconnecting with a high-school classmate on a dating app, you fly home for the holidays to chase your perfect love story. However, a misunderstanding waits for you on the other end.
A/N: Surprise @mintkims! It’s Noel!! Idk if you ever thought it was me, but here I am with your gift, and I hope you like it and it helps make your holiday season a little brighter. This is based on the cringy but kinda cute Netflix movie Love Hard. A big thank you to the lovely Fi @taesinferno for reading this over for me!
◦◦,`°.✽✦✽.◦.✽✦✽.°`,◦◦
Heels click-clacking down the sidewalk, the pink and orange neon lights of the hot new bar in town, Hope World, greet your view. You flash a smile to the handsome bouncer, two adorable dimples poking out of his cheeks as he gives you one in return, bunny teeth peeking out from under his lips.
Hope indeed. If tonight’s blind date was a failure, you could always double back to the cute guy at the door. The truth of the matter was that another year had gone by, and your family was still asking if you had anyone to bring to the annual holiday party.
Letting out a deep sigh, you think back to how much of your life (and your wallet) has been spent in the modern pyramid scheme known as dating. Several new pairs of heels, that shiny new lip gloss from Sephora, all those trips to the parlor to get your eyebrows done, and you still find yourself back exactly where you started.
Ever the cynic, you’ve compiled more than enough evidence over the years of why you should just give yourself a break and quit the dating scene. However, there’s a part of you that doesn’t buy into the whole dating culture, but sings at the thought of finding your other half. Your parents were it for each other, shyly falling in love despite having an arranged marriage. Growing up, you saw the intensity of their love and affection for each other every day, and it had you longing for a soulmate of your own.
Ping!
The chime of your phone interrupts your thoughts, a notification from CheckMate, the latest dating app that had gone viral, flashing across your screen.
JB: I’m here! All the way in the back.
You: Sounds good! Just walked in.
After asking the hostess to direct you to the table, you head away from the entrance, heart racing as you approach what could be the one. JB had seemed pretty perfect on paper - likes to cook, loves cats, has a successful job as a lawyer--
A loud sigh escapes your throat as you take in the sight of the empty table. No cat-loving man in sight.
Yet again, you’d been played.
◦◦,`°.✽✦✽.◦.✽✦✽.°`,◦◦
“Good morning my lovely ____! How is my favorite columnist doing on this fine winter day?” Ryujin slides up next to you, the wheels of her office chair squeaking against the cold tile.
“It’s not even snowing outside. How much money do you need?,” you grumble, clacking away on the keyboard.
Ryujin sticks her head in your line of vision, a sheepish look on her face.
“Soooo, how was the date?”
“Non-existent, Ryujin. It was non-existent,” you cry out. “This is such a joke! How am I even supposed to keep writing this stupid column about dating disasters when the dates have stopped happening?!”
“___, I know you,” Ryujin gives you a comforting pat on your shoulder. “You’re a brilliant and talented writer. You can take even the most mundane, normal situations and spin them into something that keeps readers engaged. You’ll find a way.”
“You better be right,” you sigh, leaning back in your chair. “Ji-Hoon is going to have my head if I have nothing to turn in at the end of this month. And then I’ll never get that promotion.”
“Well,” Ryujin chirps, snatching your phone away. “This is a team effort. Not only do you have to get laid, but you also have to get paid. And that means extending your search nationwide.”
◦◦,`°.✽✦✽.◦.✽✦✽.°`,◦◦ You let out a groan, slipping into your coziest fleece and swiping your mug of hot cocoa from the counter. Cracking your neck, you open your laptop, the comforting notes of the Christmas pageant scene in Love Actually punctuating your anxiety as you check your email.
From: Ji-Hoon ([email protected])
“Okay, it’s December. And you know what that means. Lots of lonely people. And do you know what lonely people want to hear this time of year? That they’re not alone in being lonely. So, I better have your latest edition of Never Have I Ever in my inbox before New Year’s Eve, or you can kiss that investigative piece on the healthcare system goodbye.”
Ji-Hoon knew how to hit you where it hurt. Your boss had been keeping you on as the main dating columnist for your publication since the moment you stepped foot into the office as an intern, claiming that the real topics were “better left to the men”. You’d fought tooth and nail to prove yourself to him, your once measly column skyrocketing to become one of the publications’ most read. Begrudgingly, he declared that if you ended the year successfully, he’d give you a shot at tackling your own exposé.
Letting out another sigh, you shut your laptop closed and pull out your phone. Time to get to work. You flip through CheckMate, the first couple of matches doing little to capture your interest. The next face that greets you on the screen makes your heart drop, and you silently curse Ryujin for expanding your location settings that morning.
Jeong Jaehyun. Your hometown heartthrob from your childhood. The boy that you (and every other person in your year) had a crush on in high school. Looking as fine as ever, with his bio stating that he worked as a fitness instructor for your local gym.
What took you more by surprise than seeing the former (still current?) object of your affection on this godforsaken app was the little blue bar on the top, saying “Jaehyun likes your profile! Match now to see if you two can reach CheckMate.”
Heart pounding in your ears, you feel a flush coming over your face. You’d gone all the way through high school being the painfully shy, awkward girl. Someone who’d never had a chance of catching Jaehyun’s eye. And now he likes you on a dating app? This had to be the universe playing a cruel joke on you.
Suddenly, an idea comes to your mind. Cursing yourself for diving headfirst into another masochistic dating pursuit, you take comfort in the fact that if this turned out to be a disaster, the heartbreak would fuel you to write another edition of Never Have I Ever, and the coveted exposé would finally be yours. After all, Arthur Eddington did say that time only moves forward. So what did you have to lose?
Drawing in a deep breath, you squeeze your pupils shut and press the icon on the right.
It’s a match.
◦◦,`°.✽✦✽.◦.✽✦✽.°`,◦◦
“You’re doing it again,” Ryujin chuckles, glancing over at you from the driver's seat as the two of you make your way to the airport.
“Doing what?” you sigh dreamily, eyes never venturing from your screen. Over the past few weeks, you and Jaehyun had spent every day chatting with one another, joking about everything from the horrible traffic in your city to your favorite Christmas movies. It had surprised you how well the two of you had hit it off, making plans to meet up when you arrived home to your parents’ for the holidays.
“Acting like a damn fool, that’s what!” Ryujin moans. “Seriously, I don’t think I’ve ever seen you smile so much. Like ever. You don’t even smile at me most of the time, even when I bring you coffee in the morning!”
“I am not acting like anything,” you proclaim. “He just said something really funny, that’s all.”
“Oh yeah?” Ryujin jeers. “What was it then?”
“He asked me if my name was glucose, because I’m so sweet,” you mumble, eyes looking down at the floor as your face heats up at the mention of the nerdy joke.
“Y’all are whipped for each other with a capital W,” she grins.
“Seriously, Ryujin, this feels different from all the other times I’ve chatted with someone. There’s something more there. It feels like this could actually be something.” A smile lights up your face as you gush about your interactions with Jaehyun.
“Well then, you gotta go for it!” her grin matches your as the car comes to a stop outside the terminal. She jumps out of the passenger seat, popping open the trunk to hand you your bags.
“Seriously, ___. I’m so happy for you,” she wraps her arms around you in a hug. “I hope you have the best holidays ever. I can’t wait to hear about it all when we get back.”
◦◦,`°.✽✦✽.◦.✽✦✽.°`,◦◦
“____! My poor baby, you’ve gotten so thin! What are they feeding you over there??” your mother’s voice reaches you across the terminal, causing a smile to break out on your face as you bound towards her, nearly tackling her tiny frame to the ground with a hug.
“___,” your dad chastises, wrapping his arms around you both. “Careful now, you know your mother has high blood pressure. Welcome home, my child.”
“So happy to be home, Baba. I missed Mama’s cooking so much,” you feel yourself tear up. It had been so long since you’d seen your parents, spending every spare moment of your time working for the promotion Ji-Hoon had promised you.
“You must tell me,” you mother clasps your hands and guides you into the car. “Any news from the big city? Have you found a boy you’d like to marry?”
“Mama!” you groan, settling in as the car starts. “You know I’m busy with work all the time, where would I even find a husband? And besides, it’s not like any of these city boys are husband material anyway.”
“I know my daughter is a very hard worker,” your mom says, a wistful note to her voice. “But I worry about you, living in that big place all alone. I just want someone to help take care of you when I’m not there, someone who makes sure that you’re not lonely.”
“I’m trying Mama,” you whisper, staring at the snowflakes that fall outside the window.
“___!” your dad interjects, thankfully steering the conversation away from this dreaded topic. “Did we tell you about the new pressure cooker we got, Mrs. Sharma’s family brought it with them from their trip…”
◦◦,`°.✽✦✽.◦.✽✦✽.°`,◦◦
Shivering, you wrap your parka tighter around your frame, knuckles reaching up to rap on the door. You’d never seen Jaehyun’s house in high school. Rumor had it that he always threw the craziest parties at his parents’ house, but you’d never been invited.
The house looked cute and cozy, bedecked with twinkling lights and vibrant green garlands that emanated the warm, earthy scent of pine. You hear footsteps approaching the door, and it swings open to reveal a short woman with kind eyes that crinkle upon seeing your figure waiting outside.
“Hello,” she says. “And who might you be?”
“Hi! Hey, hi, uhhhh,’ you blurt out, the woman’s eyes twinkling. “My name is ___, I’m a friend of your son’s? I’m here to see him for the holidays.”
“Oh!” the woman exclaims. “Oh my goodness, come in, come in! He didn’t tell me we should expect company tonight. Please, please, take your shoes off and make yourself comfortable. My name is Se-ah, here, let me warm you up with some tea.”
“Yah! Are those stupid telemarketers back again? Tell them we don’t want to switch to Verizon,” a man’s voice calls out from other room.
“It’s not Verizon, Joon-sang,” she yells back. “It’s a woman, and she’s here to see our son!”
A tall, dignified man walks into the room, accompanied by a much older woman, both of their eyes widening at your presence in their home.
“This is my husband, Joon-sang, and my mother-in-law, Eun-hye, but we just call her Halmeoni,” the woman smiles.
“Ahhhh, 환영합니다 (welcome)!” the older woman reaches out to envelop you in a hug. “Are you friends with my grandson?”
“Uhhh,” you flush, giggling. “I would say we’re a little more than friends.”
The three pairs of eyes light up in glee at your statement, Halmeoni bouncing up and down and clapping her hands.
“당신은 그의 여자 친구입니까? (are you his girlfriend)?” Halmeoni questions, her eyes twinkling with hope. Sheepishly, you rub the back of your neck. You should have brushed up on your Korean skills before paying Jaehyun’s family a visit, but at least they seem happy to see you.
You hear a thump from below, causing you to raise your eyebrows at the family.
“That must be him coming back from work!” his mother claps. “Ahem, Joon-ah, there’s someone here to see you!”
“Eomma, I told you to just please sign for the packages when the UPS guy comes!” the voice from downstairs yells back.
“A girl!” his mother chirps out through gritted teeth. “There’s a girl here to see you, my dear.”
“Aw shit!” you hear a crash.
“Language!” his mother groans, stomping her foot. “Just come upstairs!”
Smiling at the chaotic scene that unfolds, your heartbeat accelerates as you hear the sound of steps coming up from the basement. This was it, you’d finally see Jaehyun in person, and sit down with his family to have a nice, holiday dinner. The love story of your dreams began now.
The door bursts open, and a tall, gangly frame wearing glasses and grey sweats stumbles through, brown shaggy hair falling into his face. You pale as you recognize the man in front of you. Jaehyun this was not.
“____? What the fuck are you doing?” he yells.
“Namjoon-ah!” his mother scolds him. “What did I tell you about language? This poor girl is here to surprise you for Christmas!”
A knot forms in your stomach, and you feel bile rise up in your throat. Looking back and forth between Namjoon’s shocked face and the smiling faces of his family members, the sudden urge to vomit overtakes you.
“I’m sorry,” you say, backing towards the door, turning as you hear Namjoon run after you. “I have to go.”
◦◦,`°.✽✦✽.◦.✽✦✽.°`,◦◦
“No, no, no, no, no, this cannot be happening!” you stumbled down the steps of the Kim family home. Kim Namjoon, the equally awkward kid who’d been your senior physics partner, could not have posed as Jaehyun and catfished you. The universe hated you, but not this much.
“Fuck! ___, wait up please,” you hear Namjoon’s desperate cries echo behind you. “I-,I- can explain.”
“I don’t understand,” you turn around, meeting his flustered figure. “Jaehyun, as in Jeong Jaehyun, as in not you, told me to meet up with him here at this address when I came home for the holidays. I figured I’d just stop by, say hi, meet the man of my dreams, and this is what I get?”
“I-, shit,” Namjoon runs a hand through his hair, his glasses fogging up from the frosty winter chill. “This wasn’t how it was supposed to go. You didn’t give me, I mean him, any warning that you were coming by, he was supposed to be here to meet you, I swear.”
“Hang on, stop right there,” you lift a finger to shush him. “What do you mean he was supposed to meet me here? Why would he meet me here, at your house?”
“You can’t be serious, right?” Namjoon breathes out. “You really thought all those cute lines were Jaehyun’s? Jaehyun, who’s never had a romantic bone in his body since he first walked onto the high school football team.”
You feel the blood leave your face, the tip of your nose becoming red and chapped as it begins to leak from the cold air.
“W-what do you mean?” you wail, warm tears pricking at your eyelids.
“____,” Namjoon reaches out to put a hand on your shoulder, but you flinch from his touch. “The silver lining here is that Jaehyun likes you, he really does. But we both know he’s shit at romance, especially if words are all he has. The dude saw you on CheckMate, remembered you from high school and thought you were hot, so he paid me to woo you back here for Christmas so that you two could hit it off.”
“I’m sorry,” Namjoon’s voice is remorseful. “I didn’t think it would turn out like this. He really does like you. Maybe you should just go find him, talk to him in person, I’m sure he can help sort this all out-”
“NO!” you interrupt, causing him to jump. “I’m so fucking done. I don’t want to sort this all out. In fact, I never want to see either of you ever again!”
Your scream echoes down the street as you huff, turning on your heels and running as fast as you can.
God, you really needed a drink.
◦◦,`°.✽✦✽.◦.✽✦✽.°`,◦◦
“Another one of the candy cane cocktails,” you slur, slamming the glass down onto the countertop.
“Afraid I’m gonna have to cut you off soon, kiddo,” the bartender smirks from across the countertop, his cat-like eyes taking in the sight of your inebriated figure.
“Shut it Min!” you groan. “We may not be in high school anymore, but don’t think for one second that it’ll stop me from telling Ms. Davis that you sold everybody weed behind the dumpsters.”
“Damn,” he slides you a glass of water. “Tell me, when did you get so feisty?”
“It’s called being done with the dating world, Min,” you gurgle. “You should try it some timeeee, a load off your shoulders, let me tell you! Everybody fucking sucks, that’s just the cold hard truth.”
Shoving a stack of bills in his hands, you lift yourself up, and take a few wobbly steps to the bathroom, slumping over the toilet and puking your guts out. You’re found a few minutes later by Yoongi, who takes in the sight of your figure and makes a phone call.
-----
Blinking, the bright fluorescent lights burn your retinas as you look up, the sterile smell of a hospital flooding your nostrils. Squinting, you listen closely, catching the sound of meows and woofs from around you.
A vet hospital. You were in a freaking vet hospital. How did you end up here?
“____? My name is Dr. Jung,” a sincere looking man with a heart shaped smile greets you, taking notes on his clipboard. “You’re probably still a little drunk, but I gave you some fluids and ibuprofen for the headache you’ll have tomorrow. You’re lucky that Namjoon was nice enough to bring you here.”
You whip your head around, a worried looking Kim Namjoon greeting you, and the pounding in your head becomes worse.
“I’m sorry, ___,” he says shyly. “I was worried about you and it was the first place I thought of.”
“Rest up.” Dr. Jung says, giving you a wave. “Namjoon will take you home when you feel ready.”
As soon as he walks out the door, you turn on your companion.
“You!” you screech. “What are you doing here?”
“Ummm, I think I just saved your life,” Namjoon quips, mockingly lifting his hands up next to his ears.
“I thought I told you to leave me alone!” you scream.
“Ahhh yes, about that. Well you see, there’s been a bit of a problem,” Namjoon gulps. “My parents are under the impression that we’re dating, and now they want me to bring my ‘girlfriend’ back for Christmas dinner.”
“You are crazy, Kim Namjoon! I thought you were the smart kid. Why would I ever help you?” you yell.
“Please, ___.” Namjoon drops to his knees. “You saw the way my parents looked at me tonight when they thought we were dating. I can finally be the son that they’re proud of. Just one week. I need you to accompany me to a family dinner or two. You’re totally free to do whatever you want in your free time. You can date Jaehyun. You can not date Jaehyun. I can even pay you, just please please please help me out.”
You scoff at his pleas, when your phone pings with a text from Ji-Hoon.
Tick-tock, your time is on the clock, kiddo. It’s nearly the 22nd and I haven’t gotten a peep from you. You can kiss that exposé goodbye.
This was a disaster. In the span of less than four hours, your life had turned from the sad, sorry joke it was, to an even bigger dumpster fire. At this point, the article was the only thing you had to look forward to.
“I’ll do it,” you declare, swinging your feet side to side, avoiding meeting Namjoon’s eyes. “One week, and then we break up, and you never talk to me again.”
Namjoon offers his hand, and you shake it.
“Deal.”
◦◦,`°.✽✦✽.◦.✽✦✽.°`,◦◦
“____, my baby, you look so pretty, I can’t believe it!” your mother coos, smoothing down the part where your dress has ridden up.
“Mama!” you groan. “What are you doing?”
“Shhh, just making sure you look all prim and proper to meet Namjoon’s parents!” she smooths your hair. “Of course, I would’ve preferred that he come over for dinner first, but who am I to complain! My baby is finding love!”
Sighing, you’re relieved when the doorbell ringing allows you an excuse to escape her doting, swinging open the door to reveal a shy looking Namjoon, dressed in a brown turtleneck and peacoat, glasses askew and holding a bouquet of poinsettias.
“Namjoon!” your dad bellows. “So nice to see you, my boy. It’s been so long!”
“Since high school,” Namjoon whispers, avoiding your eyes. “Here, I brought these for your home. I’ll be sure to have her home before 10:30, sir.”
“Nonsense,” your mother grins. “No need to rush. You two youngsters have fun, okay? We’ll be here waiting for her to come back whenever you’re ready.”
“You look nice.” Namjoon smiles. You offer him a weak smile in return, but don’t say anything.
“Okay,” he breathes, shoulders slumping slightly. “Let’s get going then.”
◦◦,`°.✽✦✽.◦.✽✦✽.°`,◦◦
Warmth. The Kim household radiates it, extending far beyond the crackling of the fireplace. Namjoon’s family reminds you of your own fond holiday memories with your parents, full of laughter and jokes, and more importantly, good food.
“___, Namjoon, where did the two of you rush off too that night?” his mother asks, causing you to choke on the piece of bulgogi you’d just swallowed.
“Ahhh nothing much, eomma,” Namjoon steps as you continue to hack. “We just went to Min’s to talk over a few drinks.”
“___,” Halmeoni’s attention turns to you again, and you know you can’t escape her question. “How did you and my grandson meet?”
“Ahhh yes, Halmeoni, it was uh-,” you stumble over your words. “Just some good ol’ online dating! Just text, text, send, and the next thing you know, we’re reconnecting over an app.”
“내 시대에는 사람들이 글에 사랑에 빠지곤 했습니다 (in my day, people used to fall in love over the written word),” she smiles, and you nod frantically as you see Namjoon clench his jaw.
“So sorry,” his mother apologizes. “You know, she’s a bit old-fashioned. Now, uh, what’s caused our Namjoon-ah to catch your eye, anyway? I mean, he’s an extraordinary young man, it’s just, we’re not used to him bringing anyone home.”
You feel Namjoon stiffen next to you, his shoulders tensing before they droop, and a defeated look crosses his face.
“Namjoon has such a way with words,” you start, feeling him jolt next to you in surprise. “I have to admit, I’ve been using apps for a long time, and I’ve never enjoyed conversation as much as I have with him.”
A small grin crosses, Namjoon’s face, tiny dimples poking into his cheek as his face turns pink.
“You know,” his grandmother responds. “I was telling Ms. Jeong about these apps too. Poor woman, I told her grandson should try them. After all, if my handsome Namjoon-ah can find such a pretty girl, why can’t Jaehyun?”
The smile drops from your face at the mention of his name, and Namjoon sputters, choking on his water.
“You know, Halmeoni, I, uh-, I promised ___ I’d show her my room!” he grabs your hands, causing you to let out a small gasp at how warm it is. “Yup, we were just gonna go hang downstairs, maybe play some League of Legends, you know!”
Nodding along with him, you give the three of them a wave, standing up and following Namjoon’s lead as the two of you descend into the basement. Just a little longer, and you’d be able to head home, warm up a nice cup of tea, and watch Twilight in your pyjamas.
◦◦,`°.✽✦✽.◦.✽✦✽.°`,◦◦
“So,” Namjoon says, supporting your arm as he leads you down the creaky steps. “Welcome to my crib. This is where the magic happens.”
You take in the sight of half read books and his messy sheets, raising a quizzical eyebrow at his statement.
“That was a joke, I mean, I was just kidding,” he grunts, looking at the ceiling. “Not a lot of magic has happened here. At least not for me, anyway.”
“I love what you’ve done with the place,” you say, giving him a warm smile, his face lighting up at your words.
“I have a mini fridge with some beer, soda, you know all that jazz,” he gestures, looking for you, only to find you crouched over his weight set.
“No way! You lift?” you grab the dumbbell, testing out a few bicep curls.
“I may be a nerd, but I don’t just sit around at my computer all day,” he snatches the dumbbell effortlessly from your hand. “It’s important for me to stay healthy.”
“Namjoon,” you whisper, your voice dropping into a hush. “Why did you do this in the first place? I mean, help Jaehyun. It’s not like the two of you were even friends to begin with. Didn’t he shove you into the lockers once in high school?”
Namjoon’s eyes meet your own, and there’s a hint of glassiness in them before he turns away and scans his room, taking in the rumpled pillows, discarded beer cans, and ink splotches from where he left his marker uncapped the other day.
“I didn’t mean to get involved in this, I swear,” he begins, fidgeting with his hands. “But you see me, right? I’m nearly 30 and I still live in my parents basement. I thought that I’d go to college, get my engineering degree, and work in some high-powered job by now. But, life had different plans.”
“What do you mean different plans?” you question, moving to sit next to him on the bed, your heart falling slightly at the way he awkwardly shifts his body away from you.
“Wait here,” he says, the bed lifting as he lumbers to his feet. “I’ll be right back.”
Namjoon was turning out to be full of surprises. While the two of you had never gone beyond being acquaintances in physics class, you knew he’d been an awkward kid growing up, always too tall and too clumsy. Yet, you’d never forgotten his kind heart, him always offering to lend you notes, or stopping to water the tiny flowers that grew outside the school. He was a good person, and it made you upset to think that he could’ve been caught up in one of Jaehyun’s schemes.
A loud thud disrupts your thoughts, and you hear a shit! in the background, looking up to see Namjoon drop a large cardboard box in front of you.
“Here’s to hoping I didn’t do much damage,” he worries, a furrow in his brow. He reaches into the box, and pulls out a glass jar, which he drops into your hands.
“I don’t understand…” you take in the jar, which has the lovely scent of freshly mowed grass emanating from it.
“Well, you see, there’s been a gap in the candle market,” he wipes the dust of his pants, standing up excitedly, ready to lecture. “I’ve been to too many of my friends’ houses, and their rooms smell like bong water. It drives me crazy. I know a lot of them are too fragile to light something that smells like vanilla or flowers, so I created my own line of scents to cater to the underserved candle-loving population.”
Your mouth is agape at his revelation, and for a second, Namjoon rubs the back of his neck, seeming embarrassed that he even told you this in the first place.
“That’s amazing!” you smile, causing Namjoon to flinch slightly at your excitement. “That’s so genius, I can’t even tell you how many guys’ apartments I’ve been in that smell like ass. Why hasn’t this taken off yet?”
“Because,” Namjoon sighs. “A business requires money. It’s not like I can just ask my parents or Jin for money, they’d laugh at me. So when Jaehyun reached out asking for help, and offered to pay, I knew I couldn’t turn it down. It was wrong, but I hope you can forgive me for it.”
“Give me a discount once you launch them,” you say softly, his dimples poking into his cheeks at your words. “And I think that can be arranged.”
◦◦,`°.✽✦✽.◦.✽✦✽.°`,◦◦
The bright, white screen of your laptop burns your eyes as you stare back at the empty Google Doc. You’d been home for a little over a week, and no progress on the article. There was no explanation for why you were so stuck. You wrote about stuff like this all the time, right? Why was it so hard now?
Taking a sip of your peppermint latte, you muse, wondering if you’d finally reached your end writing about disaster dates. At some point, it had been fun, and you’d just been so excited to write about something, anything at all. You loved how the words flowed from your mind onto the page, and your humor while you recounted the miserable events of your life was in it’s way, a form of healing for both you and your readers.
However, amongst the jokes and the mishaps, the emptiness of being alone had started to set in. Not only that, but you began to question whether it was okay for you to consistently undervalue yourself and portray yourself as a caricature, when in reality, you were a strong, hard-working woman. That was the moment you begged Ji-hoon to start considering giving you different assignments.But only after you finished this damn piece.
And here you were, sat in a café, with no progress made at all. Your dreams had never seemed further away.
The bell tied to the door jingles, signaling the arrival of a new customer. Ever the people watcher, you tilt your head up to acknowledge the new entry, when your jaw drops. It’s Jeong Jaehyun. And he’s heading right towards you.
“____!” he yells, waving his hand, cheeks red from the cold. “It’s so good to see you, you look great! How has everything been?”
You gulp, not knowing what to say to him. On one hand, he’d deceived you by using Namjoon as a front for the conversation you two had. On the other hand, Jaehyun was who you’d fallen for in the first place.
“Listen,” he says. “I know it’s a busy time of year, but I was wondering if you still wanted to meet up? We were supposed to when you first got here, remember?”
Your thoughts drift to the day that had started this whole mess. What puzzled you was that Jaehyun seemed to have no awareness that you were in a fake relationship with Namjoon. Then, you remembered the two of them were barely friends, and Namjoon only got caught up in Jaehyun’s harebrained scheme to woo you. Still, Jaehyun had been the initial person that had caught your interest. It would be unfair to play along with Namjoon and also not give him a chance, right?
“Ummm,” you begin, your hesitancy to jump into the situation evident. “Yeah sure! Sure, we can do that. Let’s meet tomorrow morning, at the new brunch place that opened on Oak?”
He winks in response, causing your face to heat up. You look back at him, widening your eyes in expectation of some verbal confirmation.
“It’s a date.”
◦◦,`°.✽✦✽.◦.✽✦✽.°`,◦◦
“The prodigal son is here,” an obnoxious voice has you jolting awake from your afternoon nap, blearily rubbing your eyes when you see it’s gotten dark outside. You’d passed out after your fun date with Jaehyun that morning. He seemed like a much nicer person than you’d known in high school, and the buried teenager within you squealed at the fact that you’d finally gone on a date with the man of your dreams.
“What,” you squint, making out a shirtless Namjoon changing in the corner. You gasp, averting your eyes, hoping he didn’t catch you ogling him. “What in Rudolph’s name is that? It sounds like a siren upstairs.”
“That,” Namjoon fusses, picking lint off his sweater, offering you his hand to lift you out of bed. “Is my brother Jin. Ready to meet the favorite son?”
You open your mouth to argue-, still wearing the clothes from your date with Jaehyun, when Namjoon puts out a hand to stop you.
“___, you look fine. You look pretty actually.”
Your face breaks out into a smile, taking his hand as the two of you bound up the stairs from the basement. Looking around, your jaw drops at the cosy Christmas scene in the Kims’ living room, the whole family dressed in knit sweaters as the fireplace hung with stockings roars behind them. The two new additions catch your eye, a pretty, well dressed-woman and a tall man with shoulders so broad you can’t take your eyes off him.
“What the fuck,” you lean in and whisper in Namjoon’s ear. “You never told me your brother was so hot!”
“That’s before you hear him speak,” Namjoon shoots back. “Braincells down the drain.”
“Joon-ah!” the pretty man screams, reaching out to slap Namjoon on the back. You wince as you watch Namjoon recoil from the force of the slap. “My favorite brother! What’s going on, man?”
Finally noticing you, he cranes his head to get a better look, throwing a questioning glance in Namjoon’s direction.
“This is ___,” Namjoon steps back, and you give the family a little wave.
“Is she in Mom’s bookclub? One of Halmeoni’s knitting club friends?” Jin jeers, unable to fathom an explanation for your presence.
“Seokjin-ah, don’t be rude,” Namjoon’s mother pulls his ear, earning a yelp from her older son. “This is Namjoon’s girlfriend!”
“OH!” Seokjin sputters out. “Oh, you guys are serious! Well, I-, I, for one, am so pumped! You know, Irene and I were just wondering how Namjoon was still single. I mean, granted, he lives in the basement, and the glasses aren’t doing him any favors, but this is a Christmas miracle.”
He comes up to you, vigorously shaking your hand and thanking you. You look at him in disgust, put off completely by his rude comments about his brother. Never one to back down from putting a jerk in their place, you decide to say something.
“The pleasure’s all mine, Jin,” you reach over to sling an arm around Namjoon’s shoulders, pulling him closer to you.
The evening with the Kims passes by relatively uneventfully, well, except for the fact that you and Jin almost started a boxing match over who got to put the star on the tree. When you’d won and claimed your shiny trophy, Jin had only mumbled about how you’d put it on crooked and that he’d go back and fix it when everyone was asleep.
Yawning, you slip under the covers, the dim light of Namjoon’s desk lamp preventing you from falling asleep as your eyes begin to droop.
“Jin loves being the center of attention, doesn’t he?” you whisper, not expecting Namjoon to hear you as he works at his desk.
“He’s just used to it,” Namjoon sighs, taking off his glasses and running a hand through his hair. “He’s always been Mom and Dad’s favorite.”
“The next time he tries to steal the spotlight from you, Namjoon, steal it back,” you mumble sleepily.
Shocked, Namjoon turns to respond, tears building up in his eyes at your encouragement to stand up for himself. But when he looks, you’ve already dozed off. Smiling to himself, he flips the lamp switch and lays his head on the desk, ready to join you in the land of dreams.
◦◦,`°.✽✦✽.◦.✽✦✽.°`,◦◦
“We wish you a merry Christmas… and a Happy New Year!” Seokjin’s melodic voice rings out into the cold night as he finishes the song with a pair of jazz hands amidst raucous applause.
“Your brother seems a little too into this,” you lean over and whisper in Namjoon’s ear. The Kim family had made their way down to the local nursing home to carol, as they did every year, and you’d be surprised at seeing how invested they were in spreading cheer to the older residents. Particularly Seokjin with his overzealous renditions of every song punctuated with runs and falsettos.
“He does this every year,” Namjoon grins, his dimples popping as he pushes his glasses up onto the bridge of his nose. “It’s his way of establishing dominance.”
Seokjin asks the crowd if there are any more requests, and Ms. Mehta, the sweet old lady who never speaks much, enthusiastically makes her plea for “Baby It’s Cold Outside.”
“___ and I got this one!” Namjoon blurts out, and you whip your head to the side and give him a look that has him gulping.
“Namjoon,” you seethe, as he holds your hand and guides you to the front of the room. “I am not singing in front of these people. Over my cold, dead, lifeless body.”
“You said not to let him steal the spotlight from me again,” Namjoon mumbles, eyes downcast. “Besides, I have an idea. Just follow my lead, okay?”
Seokjin squints at you both, and you shudder under his scrutinizing gaze as he switches on the music.
“I really can’t stayyy,” you begin, your throat burning from your off-key singing voice being unused for many years. You hadn’t sung since the seventh grade play, where you played a background shop worker.
“No problem, there’s the door,” Namjoon responds, and you’re taken aback both by his change in the lyrics, but also the pleasant quality timbre of his voice. It’s raw from disuse as well, but there’s a mellifluous sincerity to the way he belts out the words in his breathy tone.
“This evening has been,” you continue on, a smile lighting up your face and a giggle escaping when Namjoon responds with “totally consensual.”
“I hope you get home safe tonight,” Namjoon croons to the coos of the nursing home crowd as they take in your non-traditional rendition.
The two of you work your way through the song, smiling when Namjoon offers his phone to give your worrying mother a call, assuring you that the drink is just lemon Lacroix.
“I ought to say no no no,” you smile as the crowd begins to clap along and you see Seokjin’s fuming face turn red.
“I’ll call you an Uber, they’re close,” Namjoon belts.
“Well you better go outsideeee!” the two of you harmonize, finishing up the song as the room erupts in cheers, many of the residents concerningly standing up from their walkers and wheelchairs to give you their kudos.
A strange feeling blooms in Namjoon’s chest as he stares into your sparkling eyes, laughing as you chat with the crowd and blush at their compliments.
“Excuse me, everyone!” Seokjin interrupts the festivities with his booming voice. “Irene and I have an announcement to make. Mom, Dad, you’re going to be grandparents.”
The crowd goes even wilder at his announcement, and you see Mr. and Mrs. Kim rush to his side, tears in their eyes, as they take in the happy news. Looking to your other side, you see a dejected Namjoon offer you a weak smile before he turns his head away and stares at the wall. Your heart drops at his sadness, remembering how happy he’d been moments before.
“May I have everyone’s attention please?” Namjoon barks out, his voice clipped. You can feel the acrimony radiating off him in waves. “Hyung, I just want to say congrats to you and Irene, it’s a dream come true for you both. Seeing you so happy and in love… it was a dream I never dared to have for myself. Until I met ___.”
You balk as Namjoon approaches you, dropping onto one knee, clenching your teeth as you motion for him to stop.
“___,” he begins, and you want to lift a hand to stop him right there, but fear doing it in front of so many people.
“Get up right now,” you hiss, rage crawling up the back of your neck.
“I know we haven’t known each other for that long,” he continues. “But they say when you know, you know. Will you marry me?”
A hush falls over the crowd as Mrs. Kim lets out a loud gasp, tears of joy flooding her eyes, and through the pounding of your heart, you hear Seokjin mumble about how Namjoon doesn’t even have a ring. Everything feels so blurry and out of focus, and your feet feel stuck, almost absorbed in a pool of quicksand. You want to do something to escape this situation, to run away, but you can’t.
Suddenly, you hear a shuffling to your side as you see Halmeoni come to stand right beside you, pulling off her mitten and slipping the dainty emerald ring off her finger and offering it to Namjoon.The cheers from the crowd become louder, all of them pleading for you to say yes.
You close your eyes, sighing and taking a deep breath as you try to calm your racing heart. This has to be the stupidest thing you’ve ever done, but you’d find a way out of this later.
“Yes,” you breathe out shakily, gasping as he slips the ring onto your finger. It’s a perfect fit.
◦◦,`°.✽✦✽.◦.✽✦✽.°`,◦◦
“Listen,” Namjoon stutters, chasing after you as you stomp down the stairs to the basement. “I know you’re mad, but you told me to stand up for myself!”
“I told you to stand up for yourself, Namjoon, not fucking get down on one knee!” you seethe, feeling your face heat up with fury. “Your grandma gave me a ring off of her finger!”
You collapse onto his bed and sob. Namjoon reaches over to pull you against him, but withdraws upon seeing your anger.
“Nothing has to change,” he says sadly. “We can make it through Christmas and then you’ll go back to the city and we’ll tell everyone that things didn’t work out.”
“Trust me,” you feel the bed dip as he sits down next to you. “I’m used to being the family disappointment, they won’t think anything of it at all.”
“I have a date with Jaehyun tomorrow too!” you wail. “What if he finds out? Fix this!”
. . .
Startled, you run up the stairs straight into Namjoon’s father bringing in firewood from outside.
“Ahhhh ___,” he remarks. “Would you like to help me out and get the fireplace going?”
“Sure!” you say a little too desperately, wanting anything to get your mind off of Namjoon. You watch him hunch over the fireplace and start scrunching up bits of newspaper along with the wood, and are taken aback by how much Namjoon looks like his father. Looking for any form of distraction, you peer at the framed photos that rest on the mantle, one of them in particular catching your eye.
“Who’s this?” you point to an older photo, recognizing all of the members of the Kim family except a man with gray hair.
“That was my dad,” Mr. Kim reminisces. “He passed a few years ago. There were two things that man loved more than anything - Namjoon and Christmas. He would always play pretend with Namjoon and climb up on the rooftop and stomp around like Santa had come. Joon couldn’t get enough of it!”
A smile breaks out onto your face at the mention of the happy memory, and you hold the frame in your hands to see a small Namjoon in front of his grandfather, dimples on display and glasses too big for his tiny face.
“You know, ___,” Mr. Kim interrupts you. “We’re really happy to have you joining the family. Namjoon hasn’t been the same since his grandfather passed. He’s always been quiet and shy, but he seems even more reserved now. I’m so glad he has you to break him out of his shell.”
Your heart drops in your chest at the tenderness in his voice. You’d have to break all of their hearts soon.
◦◦,`°.✽✦✽.◦.✽✦✽.°`,◦◦
“Namjoon, you have to help me, I’m freaking out,” you heave, sitting on the floor of the public bathroom as you panic.
This morning, you’d gone on a lovely hike with Jaehyung through the forest, the two of you exchanging shy glances and laughing over family stories. You had just been in the middle of thanking him for such a wonderful hiking date when he’d sent your expectations crashing down in one second, informing you that the real date was going downhill skiing with him.
“Ok, just breathe,” Namjoon’s voice crackles over the speaker. “Do you have your AirPods? Just put them in and listen to music.”
You frantically rummage through your bag for the earbuds, heart dropping when you realize you’d left the one item that could’ve saved you from ruin at home. Instead, your arm closes around a small item wrapped in plastic, and you smile to yourself as you pull out the gummy from your backpack.
“I found something better than Airpods.” A smug smile lights up your face.
. . .
Swaying, you bound down the basement stairs with a skip in your step, greeting Namjoon as he sits hunched over his desk.
“Glad you’re not dead,” Namjoon quips, taking in the sight of your exuberant figure.
“I’ve never felt more alive!” you shout into the void, protesting as Namjoon clamps a hand over your mouth. “Jaehyun asked me out on a date tomorrow night. You know, it feels like things are finally looking up. I finally met someone who’s as perfect on paper as he is in real life.”
A grim look colors Namjoon’s features as he juts his jaw out, clenching it to bite back his counter-argument to your statement.
“You know,” Namjoon begins, unable to contain himself. “Jaehyun is far from perfect. In fact, in some cultures, perfect eyesight and facial symmetry are considered repulsive.”
“Why are you being so weird?” you scrunch your eyebrows, hopping over to join Namjoon’s side at his desk. “Whatcha doing?”
“Just mixing some new scents,” Namjoon mumbles, staring at the wall.
You lean over him to pick up a candle, inhaling deeply as the smell of freshly cut grass permeates your senses. Namjoon is quick to tell you that the candle is named Lawnmower, and you roll your eyes at his lack of creativity. The next one you sample has the smell of sweat, but also motor oil, lending itself to a surprisingly pleasant scent. Namjoon raises yet another eyebrow, telling you this one is named Jiffy Lube.
You pick another candle up from the batch, but before you can begin to smell, Namjoon reaches over and attempts to snatch it from your grasp.
“Sorry! That one’s for me,” he squawks, but you move your arm out of the way just in time. Taking a deep whiff, you nearly groan at the delightful scent that meets your nostrils, the notes tinged with eucalyptus, Old Spice, and the tiniest hint of what you presume to be gasoline.
“What is this one?” you sigh, taking another deep inhale. “It smells so good.”
Namjoon stares tenderly at the candle in your hands, a far-off look in his eyes.
“It’s called Grandpa,” he smiles wistfully. “I started making candles because of him in the first place. The ability to take a scent, and create something so thoughtful, something so familiar. I-, I thought it would help keep his memory alive. It’s lame, I know.”
He chokes on the last few syllables, eyes misting as he quickly turns his head, not wanting you to see his emotions shine through.
“It’s not lame, Namjoon,” you whisper, putting a hand on his shoulder and leaning in to rest your head in the crook of his neck. “It’s really sweet. You’re really sweet.”
◦◦,`°.✽✦✽.◦.✽✦✽.°`,◦◦
“Pass the popcorn please,” your mother asks, the two of you curled up underneath the blanket while your father sits on the armchair next to you.
The soft hum of Silent Night echoes in the background as Love Actually plays on the tv. With all the craziness of the past few days, it was nice to be able to sit down and enjoy your time with your parents.You had yet to tell them about your “engagement”. It all seemed so surreal, and you wanted to have the peace and quiet that came with being home for the holidays.
All of a sudden, your phone pings, a notification from Namjoon lighting up your screen.
“We have a problem. The engagement announcement was sent to the paper by my grandma. Meet me outside your house in 20 mins. We have some papers to steal.”
. . .
“Slow down, Namjoon,” you whoop, as the two of you run off into the night, clad in hats and scarves in the winter chill.
You grab the last stack of newspapers from the Mins’ front porch, and jog for your life, meeting Namjoon in front of his car parked down the street.
You throw the papers in the trunk, slamming it shut before you jump into the backseat, along with Namjoon, the both of you ducking your heads to avoid arousing any suspicion.
“I’m pretty sure we’re gonna get the paperboy fired from his job,” Namjoon chuckles, and the two of you collapse into a fit of giggles at the exhilarating run you’d just gone on in the early hours of the morning.
“I think we got all of them,” you muse, opening up one of the papers to see Namjoon’s smiling face greet you on the front page along with your awestruck one. “I look like a deer in the headlights. You, on the other hand, look pretty good for the front page!”
“Ahhhh,” Namjoon lets out a groan. “That’s probably the only decent photo of me in existence.”
“Why do you do that?” you question, causing Namjoon to shift uncomfortably in his seat. “You’re not ugly, Namjoon. I know for a fact there’d be so many girls who are into you.”
“You should give up writing texts for Jaehyun, and put yourself out there!” you say enthusiastically, your face lighting up at the idea of Namjoon finally finding the love he deserved.
“I don’t think that’s going to work out,” Namjoon mumbles, looking out the window.
“Why not? Namjoon, you’re smart, sweet, hard-working, in love with your family, and not to mention, built! Tell me what girl wouldn’t want you!” you give him a playful tap on his shoulder.
Scowling, he shrugs his arm away, sighing deeply as if he’s lost in thought.
“It’s not going to work,because I’ve tried it all, okay? I’ve tried messaging other girls, but I don’t even want to pursue anything with them, because there’s only one woman I want. And I fucked it all up with her.”
Your face blanches at his admission. Surely, he couldn’t be talking about who you thought he was talking about. Heart racing, you try to open your mouth to respond to his admission, but no words come out.
“Namjoon, who are you talking about?” you whisper softly, but sternly. “Tell me, please.”
“I lied when I said I wanted to help Jaehyun get you,” he said. “I’ve always liked you, ___. Ever since high school. And when I was sitting with him that day and your picture came up, all I could think about was how much you’d changed, how cool and confident you seemed, and how much I wanted to talk to you again.”
“So I played it off as me helping Jaehyun,” he continues, taking in the sight of your furrowed brows. “I thought that, maybe if you saw the texts, and fell for the guy behind them, and not just Jaehyun’s profile full of workout selfies, that maybe you’d consider giving a nerd like me a chance.”
“I don’t understand,” you breathe out. “Why would you tell me this now? You had so many chances to say something, Namjoon.”
“I don’t expect you to respond to me,” Namjoon sighs. “That would be ridiculous, considering how much I’ve lied to you and how much I’ve made you sacrifice for me. I just wanted to stop the lies, and be honest with myself, and with you for once.”
Tears prick your lids as you sit there and ponder Namjoon’s confession. A funny feeling blooms in your chest, and suddenly, you feel as though a thousand butterflies have taken up residence inside of you, flitting their tiny wings and sending tiny shivers throughout your body.
Before you can speak, Namjoon lumbers over the console and jumps into the front seat, firing up the engine.
“Cmon,” he nods to you in the back. “I’ll drive you home. You have a date with Jaehyun, remember?”
◦◦,`°.✽✦✽.◦.✽✦✽.°`,◦◦
The quiet din of the chatter from the steakhouse patrons echoes in the background as you sit and listen to Jaehyun drone on about his latest workout routine. Before, you’d found him so riveting, unable to tear your eyes away from his angular jaw and tousled hair. Now, when you look at him, all you can see are crooked glasses, and the glimpse of two deep dimples poking out from his cheeks.
Namjoon’s confession had been sitting with you ever since the other night. Namjoon had done so much wrong, had lied to you countless times, but why did your relationship with him feel more true than anything else you’d ever experienced in your life? All the texts you’d exchanged beforehand, the warm smiles and knowing looks from hanging with his eccentric family, the laughs as the moments you shared painted vivid pictures in your memory, cementing themselves in your mind like pictures on the pages of a scrapbook.
Your mind wanders back to a few hours ago, when Namjoon caught you in the middle of leaving for your date with Jaehyun. The air between the two of you had been awkward, yet Namjoon had quelled the frigidity with a smile, remarking that you looked perfect, and that Jaehyun was “one lucky man”.
Sitting with Jaehyun, you’d always considered yourself the lucky one, capturing the attention of your high school’s former “it boy”, or who you thought would have been the man of your dreams. Now, it all felt like a devastating lie, not unlike the one you were caught up in with Namjoon.
Jaehyun was wonderful, spectacular even, but he wasn’t the one for you.
◦◦,`°.✽✦✽.◦.✽✦✽.°`,◦◦
The dawn light filters into the basement, and you open your eyes to see Namjoon curled up in a pile of blankets on the floor, snoring away. Smiling, you think back on your revelation from last night.
Today, the Kims were making a trip to the nursing home again. Halmeoni had roped the residents into accepting a class on online dating in their old age, taught by both you and Namjoon, her so-called experts. Today was also the day you decided to confess your feelings to Namjoon, to let him know that somewhere down the line in this comedy of errors, you’d fallen for him too.
You’d never seen a group of older people so enthused about putting themselves out there, bouncing ideas off of each other about what to put in their profiles, chattering loudly amongst themselves. You think back to the article you’d promised Ji-Hoon, and your brain lights up at the thought of finally abandoning your search for love, and instead showcasing these residents and their quests.
Looking over at Namjoon, you see a tick in his jaw at the sight of all the residents, and he lets out a deep sigh.
“Okay, everyone, let’s all calm down,” his voice booms out, creating a hush amongst the crowd.
“I get that you’re all excited,” he begins. “I really do. You want to put your best foot forward. All of you have lived such full, vibrant lives, with so many interesting stories to tell. But then the insecurities creep in. So you tweak your story a little bit. Still you, just a shinier version. And you keep going, until the real you, which was probably amazing to begin with, is unrecognizable.”
Namjoon turns to look at you, and you see him swallow as the faint glimmer of tears coats his eyelashes.
“I think we all forget though,” he chokes out. “That on the other side of the lie, there’s a real person. Falling in love with a version of you that doesn’t exist. And that’s not fair to either of you, because for them, it’ll end in disappointment. And for you, it’ll end in heartbreak. If I’ve learned anything from my relationship with ___, it’s that love doesn’t have to be perfect, it just has to be honest.”
You feel your heart drop in your chest as Namjoon turns his face away from the crowd, looking out the window amidst the boisterous applause. Stepping towards him, you reach for his hand, ready to give him the present you’d gotten, only for him to excuse himself, saying he has to step outside to speak to his parents.
Head spinning, you indulge Mrs. Khan’s inquiries for a few brief moments about which selfies are the best to put on her profile.
“I’m sorry,” you put a sympathetic hand on her shoulder. “I have to step out for a moment.”
Making your way to the doorway, you conceal yourself from Namjoon’s view, as he’s deep in conversation with his very flustered parents. Mrs. Kim’s eyes are red, like she’s been crying, and Mr. Kim wraps a sympathetic arm around her shoulders.
Listening in, you catch winds of “I’m sorry I lied”, to “I was only trying to help ___ get Jaehyun” and “I know you’re disappointed”. To your horror, you look up at the most incorrect time to see Seokjin glaring daggers at you from the staircase. And that’s when your face blanches in horror. He knows. They all know. Namjoon told them everything.
Bile rises up in your stomach as you feel vomit rise up in the back of your throat. Namjoon had taken the fall for you once again. You think back to how you could have easily avoided this mess by confessing to him sooner, making sure that he didn’t have to out himself to his parents like this, with only the bitter sting of disappointment and a broken relationship in his wake.
You feel a pair of eyes on yours, and look to see Namjoon staring at you in the doorway. His parents and Jin have both retreated into the main room. Looking at his guilty face, you feel tears seeping down your face, shaking your head as you turn on your heels and run out the front door.
Namjoon wants to run after you, to hug your shaking body and wipe your tears away, but he knows he doesn’t have a right to anymore. His eyes catch the glint of sparkly wrapping paper on the floor, and he drops to his knees to examine the gift that had fallen out of your hands, addressed to him.
Tearing away the crinkly paper, his eyes fall on a candle, a note attached to it.
Dear Namjoon,
A passion whose flame fails to be fanned eventually burns out. You are the brightest light I’ve ever met. Please don’t be afraid to be you.
Love (I guess I mean this literally),
____
◦◦,`°.✽✦✽.◦.✽✦✽.°`,◦◦
New Year’s Eve
Waiting for the fireworks was always the hardest part. Your parents had gone to sleep long ago, claiming they were too old to see the promise of what a New Year brought.
Since the nursing home debacle, you’d made some sort of progress in terms of getting your life together. Realizing you couldn’t keep chasing after the promise of love to provide fulfillment, you’d reached out to Jaehyun, telling him you enjoyed your time together, but unfortunately, you didn’t feel the same way. You’d also come clean to your parents about the entire Namjoon situation. While they had been shocked, and slightly upset, your mother had pulled your head into her lap and combed your hair as you cried. She’d told you to find him again and tell him about your feelings, but you didn’t know if you could stomach hurting him anymore.
Pulling up your laptop, you see an email from Ji-Hoon, which causes you to roll your eyes. Of course your boss would be on your case during a worldwide holiday. Opening it, you read over his threat.
____,
Christmas has come and gone, and no article! I’ll be seeing you in my office when you come back.
Sighing deeply, you make a vow to yourself once you got back to the city, you’d stand up to Ji-Hoon, telling him you were tired of writing about dating, and that you wanted to prove yourself as a real journalist. You’d had enough of going along with other people’s plans for you, deciding to take charge of your life.
Unfortunately, that also meant deleting CheckMate from your phone. Before you’d gotten rid of the app for good, you’d paused upon seeing there was one new profile in your area. Opening it up, you’re greeted with Namjoon’s smiling face in various photos, from him riding his bike to hugging a puppy. You break out into a grin at the caption underneath.
Looking for someone who can see me for who I am.
A knock on the door interrupts your musing, and you furrow your brow. Who could be here at this hour?
Twisting the doorknob, you gasp as you’re met with the sight of Namjoon, decked out in a cosy sweater and scarf, a beanie on top of his messy hair. He smiles at you, and that’s when you realize he’s holding something in his hands. They look to be giant poster boards of some sort.
The reference isn’t lost on you as your heart begins to race, and you give him a slight nod, urging him to move forward.
Namjoon flips over the first card.
I’ve spent my entire life trying to be the perfect guy, hoping to catch the attention of the most perfect girl.
You feel your face heat up as he changes over the cards, your heartbeat continuing to pound in your ears.
But there’s perfect, and then there’s me.
A sad smile crosses your face as you read the card, but you look up, and Namjoon lets out a chuckle.
Most people want someone to read the Sunday newspaper with. I want someone who steals it with me on a Saturday night.
A giggle escapes your lips, and Namjoon’s smile grows wider, eyes turning into half moon crescents.
So can you ever forgive me? For taking so long to realize that it’s you, I love, actually?
You don’t even wait for Namjoon to drop the last card before you’re bounding down the steps, tackling him into the snow and crashing your lips onto his. You feel Namjoon let out a small groan, wrapping his arms around you to push you closer into his chest.
As you break apart, the two of you exchange shy smiles, faces heating as you stare into each other’s eyes.
“I got your gift,” Namjoon whispers softly, pausing to press a kiss to your nose, which has become chapped and red from the cold.
“Until I read that tiny note,” he says, breathing fogging in the winter air. “I was so prepared for this whole thing to be a sour memory, another thing that I let my insecurities ruin for me.”
“But I thought more about it,” he says, “And I realized that you, ___, you taught me how to be brave. How to make daring, and sometimes stupid decisions, but to never be afraid of going out on a limb and expressing myself.”
“So, I want to give this a shot,” he declares. “I told my dad about my candle-making business. And, he didn’t think I was weird for it! I got a loan from him, and I’m moving to the city next month.”
He beams, and your eyes widen in surprise. Gazingly tenderly at him, you brush the messy strands of hair.
“Love stories for me have always had bad endings,” you respond. “But I’m excited for this one to be a new beginning.”
Throwing your arms around him, the two of you stay there, holding each other for who knows how many moments, until the first firecracker lights up the sky.
“Happy New Year, ___,” Namjoon says softly. “Here’s to being us.”
Taking your hand in his you, lay your head on his chest, looking up at the spectacle that signals the promise of new hope.
“Here’s to us.”
A/N pt. 2: Onyx, I really hope you enjoyed this 10k long crack fest lmao! I loved being your secret santa. Thanks for reading! As always, any feedback or comments are much appreciated, but I appreciate you all anyway. Lots of love, Isi 💜
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ichorai · 4 years ago
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i just wanna say thank you to every single one of you !! the mutuals i talk to, the ppl i see on my dashboard, the ppl who like my fics / posts, and the 3.7k that follow me omg :(( i love yall sm i rlly dont deserve you guys
2021 may not be the blessing that all of us want, but we can try to survive through it together !! pls pls pls stay safe and healthy and my messages + inbox are always open for anybody who wants to talk or just needs a friend ♡
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tumblr crushes.  everybody listed below are all the blogs i’ve had massive crushes on (dkjdf im rlly exposing myself huh) bolded are the crushes that follow me back aka my moots !! whether we talk every day or not at all, i love all of u sm :3
# - e ; 
@127-mile​, @1oserjk​, @3riberri​, @4-sun, @429hj, @99yh, @9uk, @aasthrielle, @agustdiv1ne, @angeliicmin, @angelinanamoo, @annawritesnct, @army-author, @ashisparanoid, @asteriaguk, @atbzkingdom, @ateez-little-star, @ateez-svt, @ateezinmymind, @ateezsunrise, @ateezthings, @atiny-ahgase, @atiny-baby, @atinybitofau, @atinybrew, @atinyfeels, @atinykidult, @atzgiggle, @aurorhwa, @ayyysweetcreature, @baehyukng, @baekhvuns, @baekhyunl, @baekonbaek, @baekwell--tart, @bangtantaegi, @barsformars, @beyond-gethsemane, @binnies, @blueish-sun, @bluelotuss, @bluemiinn, @bluumin, @brathyuck, @burgerkang000, @btsbed, @bubyjong, @butterflyjoong, @by-moonflower, @byeoltoyuki, @c-sanshine, @call-me-bha, @canyounotkaia, @cappujinho, @cchaiart, @ceojongho, @ceruleanskies, @chanbinns, @changsun, @cherryatiny, @cherryhan1386, @cherryjk, @chimtaera, @chittsu, @choi-san, @choijongho, @choisans, @chryzu, @cinanamon, @cinnaminsvga, @closer-stars, @cometoceantrenches, @cosmoguk, @cozyjae, @cozyteez, @crustypeppermintcookie, @crvgio, @cuddlyunho, @curanonemu, @daybreakx, @dazzlingkai, @ddaenysus, @ddalgi-yong, @dear-hao, @dearncityy, @dearyongs, @dejvns, @diaryofateez, @dis-easy, @djxiao, @dreamiehrs, @dreamiesdotcom, @dreamingxuxi, @dreamtaehyung, @dylanxmin, @eggyukhei, @elcie-chxn, @emhpathy, @ephemeralkookie, @essenteez, @eternalbulletproof, @ethaeriyeol
f - j ; @faerieth, @fakeleaves, @fandomsonrequests, @feverishdreamdistrict, @fleurateez, @flirtyhyuck, @flowerboyyoonbin, @flowerkth, @flowerseok, @floweryjh, @flvtteringpetals, @foreveryouaremystar, @fortunexkookie, @fqiryaurora, @gaylligator, @gowonhatesyou, @grxceblqckthxrn, @gukssunshine, @guktro, @gukwluv, @gukyi, @gyukult, @haine13, @halahala, @halahalaatme, @hanatiny, @hanavbara, @haotheheckk, @heartyyjeno, @heavenlyhongjoong, @heeseungluvs, @heterotragedies, @hobidreams, @honeybeedaydreams, @honeytae, @hongcultz, @hongism, @hopejanaee, @hoseoksyn, @hoshees, @hquackity, @httpknjoon, @hunjins, @hwaberrykiwi, @hwaddict, @hwanami, @hwaseongsbabie, @hwastreasure, @hyuckles-chuckles, @hyucktapes, @illicit-roses, @imlikechaitea, @imoonstarstuff, @inclebtsmix, @inkigayeo, @interstellix, @jaehyuked, @jaehywn, @jaemericano, @jaeminslatte, @jaeminsorbit, @jamaisjoons, @jamaiswoo, @jamaisvujjk, @jayehope, @jcngkooks, @jcngyeol, @jenojam, @jensungf, @jeogiyall, @jeong-uwu, @jeongyunhoed, @jeonqqin, @jeonsdear, @jeonsweetpea, @jimindelune, @jimineos, @jimlvb, @jinmindeulle, @jinned, @jisungshotfirst, @jjeongukie, @jjoon, @joenns, @johnni, @jonghours, @joonghwas, @jooniescupcakes, @joonsgalore, @joonsinnerchild, @juliaseongjoong, @junghelioseok, @jungkookiebus, @jungkxook, @jungshookz, @junstruly, @justrose-things, @jwyfldr
k - o ; @k-n-e-o, @kayabred, @kim-taehyung, @kimchitae, @kimnjss, @kimtaehyunq, @kingjoong, @kireiwoo, @kitsutaes, @kittae, @knjspjm, @kodabodaa, @kookiesjoonies, @kookiestarlight, @kookmint, @kpophoneybunny, @kqtiny, @kyung-seokie, @kyuscafe, @lafaussejoie, @lavenderkoo, @leebutnot, @leeknowism, @lettersfromaphrodite, @lettersfrompersephonae, @lightgreybg, @lilacwoo, @lostcherryjk, @loveablejeekies, @lovedsweet, @lovely-ateez, @lovelygalaxy333-writes, @lovsoul, @lunarmingi, @luvsjoon, @lvrbun, @lybomb, @m24sail, @mapofbts, @markftmingi, @may-tree, @meiiyue, @melodiamore, @mhirais, @midnightseonghwa, @milkbts, @milkyoonoh, @minflix, @minghaon, @mingi-theestallion, @mingkiii, @mingtopiaa, @minihongjoong, @minsugams, @mintyguk, @minyoongail, @mismatchmark, @mistymark, @mjlkau, @mmmhs, @mmoondance, @monotape, @moonblssm, @moongaera, @moonguk, @moonlightzone, @moonlitmyg, @mountainhearts, @mountainsluna, @ms-starlight, @nakamoto, @namgination, @namkooks, @naryfial, @neo-shitty, @neocitybynight, @neptune-xuxi, @nevio, @nose-bandaid, @nvmguk, @oceanofaurora, @ofcyunho, @oksws, @omot7, @onceatinymoo, @orphicepiphany, @osakkun, @ot7always, @park-seonghwa
p - t ; @peachjaem00, @peaches-writes, @personasintro, @petitemingi, @phattestuwu, @philosopher-of-fandoms, @pinktea99, @pinkyyunho, @pjimns, @pjmsdior, @prdshobi, @punkill, @queereightiesheartthrob, @riajae, @rookiegukie, @rosy-wooyoung, @royaltypark, @saksukei, @san-hwa, @sanhwaflower, @sannieboy, @sanstar, @santastic, @seacottons, @seiiblue, @seokstrivia, @seonghwanotes, @seongwhy, @seongsangies, @seonqwha, @serendipityseulgi, @serendipityunho, @serenityswords-main, @seungyoune, @shangri-woo, @she, @shuhuas, @sichengsbimbo, @sillyseoks, @simphwa, @simpsiren, @sketchguk, @skymoonandstardust, @sleepingrenjun, @sleepyateez, @sleepyjhs, @sleepyyangyang, @smallfrye, @smileysuh, @smoochkooks, @snackhobi, @softjeon, @softyoongina, @solarmingi, @soleilees, @songteez, @spacejaems, @sparklingchan, @starlightjoong, @starryseung, @starsuh, @straypatchkids, @strayssara, @stressed-asian, @stutterfly, @sugarboyuto, @sugarjaee, @sugaxjpg, @sungchans, @sunkissedjk, @superhajimark, @taehyungsjuicybooty, @taeilmeyourw1sh, @taelepathysroom, @taemines, @taerseok, @taeyongleee, @talkbykhalid, @tbhchoi, @tearvantae, @teeniemoarmy, @tenaciousinferno, @tenseoyong, @teote, @thanxxskz​, @the-marionettes-locket​, @the-star-named-dowoon​, @the-wonandonly​, @thespadesinyourhearts​, @thorsdreams​, @timetoresurface​, @tiniesan​, @tinylaelia​, @toffee-hwa​, @treasure-hwa​, @treasurehobi​, @tsukuyomes​, @tvfff​, @twdeadfanfic​
u - z ; @uayv​, @userguk​, @utopianvoices​, @v-hope​, @vante-love​, @vanxbb​, @venusjinnie​, @viastro​, @wabisaba​, @waiyv​, @warmau​, @whimsical-ness​, @wincore​, @wintertae​, @wonglix​, @woojjongs​, @wooyunhwa​, @writearctic​, @wuuyoung​, @xherxx​, @xiaocity​, @xjoonchildx​, @xsandjenos​, @xuxi-rolls​, @yeochikin​, @yeoldontknow​, @yeoldotcom​, @yeosangscupid​, @yeostars​, @yeosvng​, @yessidzuiichi​, @yooaliceee​, @yoondoze​, @yoongicrumbs​, @yoongs-jeontae​, @yoonia​, @yoonohho​, @yunhoiseyecandy​, @yunhoway​, @yunhowhoitiss​, @yuniixoxo​
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follower count + note ; 3.7k ???? why are yall following me omg kdjdkfjd thank you :(( the amount of love i hold for you guys is immeasurable !! a lot of yall tell me that you’re too scared to talk to me but pls do !! i dont bite i swear !! i love making friends here ! and im sorry for not replying to all of your asks :// sometimes i like to keep them private for my eyes but i swear i read every single one !! thank you again and have a great new year !
following count ; 1.3k lmaoo my dashboard is constantly flooded and sometimes it’s really hectic but fr thank you all for filling my tumblr with happiness and positivity with the occasional thirst trap for a kpop idol rip
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2020 fics + upcoming in 2021 recapping all of the fics i wrote this year + lil comments / behind the scenes
- read to me ; kim namjoon ; may 23 - an accident ; johnny seo ; may 23 - chocolates ; jung jaehyun ; may 23 - flash drive ; lee donghyuck ; may 23 - rain ; jeon jungkook ; may 25 - flirts (but no kisses) ; park seonghwa ; may 29
i wrote all of the fics above as part of a short drabble game i made to get out of my writers block !! they weren’t my best works, but i got around 70 requests omg and i only wrote out the first six rip :(( i wanted to write more but i just needed a break for my mental health and couldn’t continue on so i’m sorry to those who requested and didn’t get a fic :(
- rivers over stones ; jeon jungkook ; sept. 12 this huge monster of a fic was what got me out of my writers’ block !! tbh i expected the fic to get like.... 20 notes but it ended up getting far past 3.5k omg thank you so much for all the praise for this fic, it took sooo long for this fic to get out too smh, i can’t believe it was still received so well !!! fyi i read every single review / reblog tags bcs i love reading what yall think :D 
- the day bled away ; park seonghwa ; oct. 16 i wrote this after catching up to the good doctor and i was just in the mood for angst and the idea of hwa being a doctor lol
- mr. sad piano man ; min yoongi ; oct. 29 more fluffy soft angst !! i love writing this genre, especially for yoongi and i’m happy this one was received well !!!
- birthday waffles ; min yoongi ; nov. 14 i was just so soft for yoongi and i wanted to write more for him !! so i made this soft / angsty fic that i’m not particularly proud of, but i’m still glad it’s out there bcs it was sitting in my draft doc for sooo long
- cellmates ; one ; two ; three ; jung wooyoung ; oct. 19 - dec. 23 this is my baby :(( my first long original series !! i’m sooooo excited for this fic to progress and i’m so happy you guys like it as well :3 i love making yall suffer lmaoo 
coming soon in 2021... - future parts of cellmates - king!taehyung x mage!reader (21k written / estimated 40k) - fire!seonghwa x ice!reader (5k written / estimated 20k) - lots and lots more !!!
check out m.list + wips for more info.
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final note.
thank you all :(( i really don’t have any words to say left so pls just stay safe and have a happy new year !!! my inbox and messages are always open !
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