#jenny should stick with writing

[swxnnnix]

hi miss jen would it hurt you to remember your tags (yes it would)

[wileys-russo]

filling the void (2) II a.putellas x sister!reader

part one

so i kinda...angst'd a whole lot harder than planned? but the song listened to when breaking my own heart writing this was all the pretty girls by kaleo, i recommend a listen while you read! filling the void (2) II a.putellas x sister!reader

you tapped your foot somewhat anxiously as you sent a smile to the waitress hovering nearby, the older woman clearly wanting to take your order as she passed by for the fifth time since you'd sat down.

"buenos días pequeña." your attention shifted as your breakfast date finally arrived, your anxiety that she might not come melting away as you stood to greet her, the older girl pulling you into a hug as you kissed her cheek.

"thank you for coming." you smiled a little nervously at olga as the two of you sat down, the waitress appearing again within seconds as you both ordered a coffee and she left you be with a food menu.

"thank you for inviting me." olga smiled, hanging her bag on her chair. "not that i do not want to have breakfast with you nena, but can i ask why i am here? you did not sound like yourself on the phone this morning." olga started gently as you nodded.

through the few years she'd been with alexia olga had of course been welcomed into the family with open arms, and albeit the growing gap between you and your sisters you still liked her a lot and visa versa.

olga had been the most nervous to meet you when she first started seeing alexia, knowing both from her girlfriend and through the grapevine that you had been incredibly close with her last partner jenni before she and alexia broke up, olga fearing you might resent her for not being jenni.

but right away you saw how happy olga made alexia and how she often brought out a different side to your eldest sister, something goofier, more juvenile and softer like when alexia was younger and there was far less responsibility on her shoulders weighing her down.

"sí, i wanted to apologise to you." you got right to the point, your sisters girlfriend quirking an eyebrow curiously but nodding for you to continue.

"i had no idea the event my friends invited me to was yours i promise, if i had known before i would not have agreed to go. but they bought my ticket for me and i only realized when we arrived that it was manuelas. then i tried to tell them why i couldn't go in but they insisted and i wanted a night out." you started, twisting the rings on your fingers nervously.

"but i should have thought about it more before i agreed to go inside. if someone found out i was underage and you were serving me alcohol you could have been in a lot of trouble and i did not think about anyone but myself." you sighed deeply, a noise which held far too much responsibility for someone your age making olga frown a little out of concern.

"so i am very sorry." you wrapped it up as your coffees arrived, thanking the waitress with a smile as you took a cautious sip and awaited olga to speak.

"thank you for apologizing pequeña." olga started softly once she'd had a mouthful of her own coffee, nails tapping absentmindedly against the burnt orange ceramic mug cupped in her hands.

"but i am not mad, and i was not mad at you the other night. i was just worried for you and for your safety which is why i tried to find you in the club before you ran away. but i can see now that i did not need to be because you are much more mature than any seventeen year old i've ever met, myself included." olga chuckled as she took another sip of coffee, a small smile curling onto your lips.

"but next time you want to go out with your friends to one of my events you come to me about it first, sí?" olga's tone became a little more serious as you quickly nodded in agreement.

"buena. or else i will have to stick pictures of your face behind the bar with a do not serve sticker across your forehead!" the older girl grinned teasingly which you returned, tension sucked away now as you visibly relaxed.

"so, estamos bien?" you checked in as you both grabbed the menu's to look at ordering some food. "sí pequeña, more than okay. but breakfast is on you since this is an apology!" olga winked making you laugh and agree with a nod, the two of you falling quickly into a different conversation.

~

alexia looked up from her phone as the front door opened, smiling at her girlfriend who stepped through and hung her keys on the hook, the spanish captain standing quickly to greet her.

"hola mi amor." olga laughed against alexia's lips which were quickly pressed to hers in a series of soft kisses, breaking apart and heading for the kitchen as alexia took her seat back at the counter.

"how was your meeting?" alexia questioned, ready to leave for training in an hour or so. "was not a meeting." olga shook her head, opening the fridge intending to make a list of what was needed so she could go shopping while alexia was training.

"i met your sister for breakfast, she called and asked me while you were in the shower this morning." olga explained, nails tapping away at her phone screen noting down what needed to be bought.

"so alba can see you but not reply to me? i have called her three times this morning!" alexia groaned in annoyance with a roll of her eyes, pulling out her phone intending to give her younger sister a piece of her mind.

"no amor, not alba." olga's hand gently pushed the phone down as alexia frowned. "oh. you saw fresa?" alexia's eyebrows shot up in surprise as olga hummed with a nod of confirmation.

"she called to ask you out to breakfast." alexia echoed as again olga nodded. "sí, she wanted to apologise for the other night." olga started gently, knowing the last few days had been a large wake up call both for alexia and alba who had been in near constant contact trying to work out how to fix things.

"really?" alexia asked in disbelief. "really. ale sometimes i forget she is only seventeen, she has a very good head on her shoulders. she even paid for breakfast too." olga smiled as alexia sat there stunned, drumming her fingers on the counter clearly lost for words.

"you called to invite her over for dinner this week?" olga asked softly capturing her attention again, rounding the corner and slotting herself in between the taller girls legs.

"i tried but she will not answer alba or i, both our texts or calls she just blanks them." alexia sighed as olgas arms draped over her shoulders, nails scratching lightly at the base of her neck relaxing her a little as alexia's own hands settled on her girlfriends hips.

"can you blame her cariño? when is the last time you called her just to talk to her?" olga spoke carefully, alexia looking as though she might argue before she deflated. "i cannot remember." the blonde muttered, shame obvious in her features as she looked away.

"how did i miss this? how did i mess this up so badly? she hates me olga and i cannot even fault her for it!" alexia laughed bitterly, the brunette wincing in sympathy.

"she does not hate you mi vida, venga." olga grasped her lovers hand, pulling her off the stool and leading her over to the sofa, sitting down and gently tugging the taller girl to lean into her side, hugging her tightly.

"she should after what i said the other night." alexia admitted after a few moments of silence had passed, pulling away slightly as olga gave her a curious look and alexia sighed, not having been completely honest with her about everything.

"i was so angry with her and the fact she did not seem care about what could have happened. but i was just so scared, what if someone spiked her drink? took advantage of her? hurt her? anything could have happened that night and i have been so absent i would not have even known. something could have already happened and i would not know!" alexia exhaled shakily, olga tracing a thumb over her knuckles.

"but what did you say to her amor." olga pushed gently, alexia avoiding her eyes as she paused for a moment. "i told her she was a careless, stupid, selfish little accident." alexia admitted quietly, olgas hands immediately withdrawing from hers as she recoiled in shock.

"alexia." the brunette managed out in disbelief. "i know. i know, it was horrible and cruel and i knew it would hurt her. i was so angry and scared i lashed out at her." alexia recounted, the memory burned into her mind like a branding, the blonde had been replaying it over and over for the last few days.

"you have not spoken to her since? apologized?" olga frowned as alexia shook her head. "no, alba and i have both tried but she just does not answer." alexia dragged her hands down her face, cheeks burning with shame that she once had the nerve to call herself your protector.

"she used to be this tiny perfect little baby, i remember the day she was born alba and i were so excited. when mami told us she and papi would be having another baby we were always happy, always supportive. mami was so worried we would resent her because there would be such an age gap, making us promise we would never." alexia started, voice hoarse and raspy as she avoided the burning gaze of her lover sat beside her.

"but from the very moment i laid eyes on her i promised i would never let anything hurt her, i would spend my life looking after her and making sure she knew she was so loved. she was so small when i first held her, our abuela knitted her this little blue blanket and beanie and my pinky didn't even fit in her tiny hand. she had rosy cheeks and bright eyes and she was perfect, our little bundle of joy." alexia recounted fondly, olga shuffling a little closer and placing a hand on her knee.

"our papi used to joke that she was born with a personal security team. the first few months she was home alba and i would argue over who got to hold her, help with feeding, dress her. at night we would drag our pillows in and sleep on the floor by her crib, we used to talk to her for hours and she would just giggle at everything." alexia smiled looking off into the distance with a forlorn gaze.

"then as she grew up and got a little older she could be so annoying. always following alba or i around wanting to do whatever we did, always wanting to be around us and just like us, copying anything we did, stealing our clothes to wear too. but i used to get her to mimic whatever alba said for hours and hours, she hated it but fresa always did whatever i asked." alexia chuckled at the memory, a small smile tugging at her lips before it slowly faded.

"but the way she looked at me the other night, like i was just a stranger in her home who she didn't even know. where is my little pequeña with strawberry stains all over her shirt who looked at me like i was the center of her universe? our fresa." alexia managed to whisper out as olga winced.

"mi amor, she grew up." the brunette spoke softly as alexia nodded. "sí. i took my eyes off her for a second and now she is all grown up, and i have failed her as a sister." alexia muttered bitterly, angry now at herself and how she had been so selfish and blind to everything.

"then fix this alexia. make things right with her before she grows up anymore and it is too late."

~

you'd not heard them arrive as you were in the shower getting ready to hang out with your friends, eli surprised to see both her other daughters at her front door when she opened it.

"hola mami. can we come in?" alexia started, both girls having been far too ashamed of their behavior to reach out much this week as eli nodded and moved aside, both her girls kissing her cheek hello.

"is fresa here?" alba asked hopefully as they both took a seat at the island, eli returning to the kitchen to keep making dinner. "sí, she is in the shower." eli nodded, turning around to stir the rice boiling in the pot as alexia and alba shared a look.

"so you have both thought about what we spoke of?" eli asked without turning back around, glancing over her shoulder her eldest two nodded. "we have and we want to fix things. we really really want to fix things with her mami, thats our baby." alexia spoke for the two of them as eli turned around with a small smile.

"i told you both, she is not a baby anymore." eli cautioned gently, scraping the vegetables off her chopping board and into the pot. "she will always be a baby, our baby. but we know she has grown up mami, and we want to be there to watch her continue to." alba spoke now as eli hummed.

"so you are both going to make an effort then? and because you want to, not because you feel you have to?" eli clarified as her daughters nodded in promise.

"we don't know how we let it get so bad mami, we thought she was just...spending time with her friends, that she didn't need us around as much." alexia admitted guiltily as eli only hummed.

though before another word could be said footsteps were heard and your eyes widened as you stepped into the living room and suddenly there was 3 pairs of eyes trained on you.

"hola hermanita." alexia spoke first, tone soft and as she smiled your hackles went up, sure that this had to be some sort of trap. "hola." you replied back curtly, tearing your eyes away and edging around the room.

"i'll be home later mami." you smiled grabbing your house keys as your hand hovered on the door handle. "wait hija!" eli called out as you raised an eyebrow.

"can you stay for dinner? meet your friends after, i made your favorite." eli offered, though her tone conveyed that this was still your decision, not wanting to push you into anything as you tried to ignore your sisters eyes boring into the side of your head.

"vale, i will message them now." you agreed with a small smile, hurrying back to your room before anyone could say another word. as alba went to stand and go after you eli sent her a look which said it all, they needed to let you come to them.

"nena! dinner is done." eli called out to you a few moments later as alba set the table and alexia helped dish up. "i can go get her?" the eldest putellas offered when everything was ready and you'd still not ventured out of your room.

eli nodded and alexia set off, pausing outside your door with a hand raised, pausing for a moment before knocking gently, stepping back suddenly as it swung open.

"dinner's ready fresa." alexia smiled as you only nodded curtly. "don't call me that." you replied quietly, shuffling past her and heading for the living room as alexia frowned and deflated at your words.

"why not?" alexia followed after you though if you heard her you made no move to acknowledge it, alba patting the chair next to her with a hopeful smile as you ignored the offer and sat down next to eli.

alexia knew she should drop it, try not to push and let you come to her but as you all sat down to eat she couldn't help it. "why can't i call you fresa?" you paused at the question before rolling your eyes.

"because i'm not a baby anymore, its a stupid nickname." you mumbled before shoveling a forkful of food into your mouth, eli sending alexia a sharp stare warning her to drop the topic as she started to argue your answer.

an awkward silence fell around the table as you shifted uncomfortably, well aware of the four eyes boring into you across the table as you stared down at your food and tried to pretend it was like any other night and they weren't there.

but given the set table and change to your regular routine, it was hard to ignore completely.

growing up you'd always had a strict family rule about eating all together and always at the table, no exceptions. though as the years passed and suddenly it was just you and eli she had softened, the two of you often sitting together on the lounge eating dinner and watching some sort of spanish soap most nights.

"so, how is work going?" you heard alba ask and assumed the question was directed at your mami, zoning out a little until you felt a gentle nudge to your shoulder and looked up, blushing when you realized your sister was actually asking you.

"its fine." you shrugged quietly, a pause following as everyone waited for you to elaborate. when you didn't eli decided to step in, taking the slightest amount of pity on the obvious struggle your sisters had to try and mend things.

"she can now test and take the blood, she is thinking about going to medical school." eli spoke proudly as you glanced at her with a small smile and your sisters eyes widened in surprise.

"to become a doctor?" alexia asked quite stunned as you scoffed. "no to become a firefighter." you rolled your eyes again as alba snickered quietly, wincing as alexia stomped on her foot and shot her a glare.

"to become a nurse." eli corrected as you nodded. "what about tennis, do you have a competition coming up?" alba asked as you gave her a strange look. "i don't play anymore" you reminded as she frowned.

"how is mariona?" alexia asked next, referencing your childhood best friend, someone you were no longer friends with. "how would i know?" you shrugged still looking down at the table in front of you and starting to eat a little faster, uncomfortable with all this sudden attention and interest.

"well she is your best friend, no?" alexia questioned in confusion. "no she's not." you mumbled shifting a little as eli caught her daughters eye and subtly shook her head, urging her away from the topic as alexia frowned but dropped it none the less.

"i didn't think you liked peppers pequeña, used to fight and kick and spit them out." alba chuckled quickly changing subjects as you continued to eat. "almost like when people grow up their tastes change, crazy!" you muttered sarcastically as your sisters grin fell away.

"what about art? are you still taking classes?" alexia swooped in next as you raced to finish your food and eli watched on at the trainwreck this dinner was fast becoming. "don't do that anymore." you answered quietly among mouthfuls.

"why? you were so good fresa." alba frowned as there was a clatter as you dropped your fork into your now empty bowl. "don't call me that. i'm not your fresa, or your pequeña, or your hermanita or your chiqui. i'm not a baby anymore!" you warned with a huff, grabbing your empty bowl and standing.

"can i go now please mami? my friends are here." you asked eli in a much calmer tone who nodded as you darted to the kitchen, rinsing out your bowl.

"i'll be back late, don't wait up." you ducked down to kiss eli's cheek and made a beeline for the door, grabbing your keys. "what you don't say goodbye to us anymore?" alexia spoke up as alba elbowed her with a glare.

"oh no i forgot alexia. it must have been an accident!" you bit back, clearly intending your words to mean something else, enjoying the way your eldest sisters face paled.

"hermana i really need to-" but alexia couldn't finish her sentence before the door was closing and you were gone. "nice one ale." alba mumbled with a shake of her head, grabbing her and eli's bowls.

"don't wait up, how late does she normally get back mami?" alexia asked with a frown, ignoring her younger sister who was washing up their dishes.

"whenever. she has never been dishonest with me about her plans, i trust her and she is responsible, more than either of you two were at her age." eli pointed out as both girls scoffed. "mami!"

"so she just comes home in the middle of the night and you say nothing? she's seventeen!" alexia scoffed with a roll of her eyes.

"like i said alexia, i trust her. she might be seventeen but she has had to grow up a lot faster than most girls her age trying to keep up with the two of you." eli warned softly as alexia fell quiet. "those are her friends?" alba asked, watching out the window as you walked up to a car and two girls got out.

alexia was up and by her side in an instant, both your sisters watching you hug the two older girls before getting into the car and taking off. "they are too old for her to be hanging out with. what about all of her other friends from school? mariona? natalia?" alba questioned with a frown.

"like i said hija, your sister has grown up a lot faster than other teenagers. as for mariona, you will never mention her name in this house or around your hermana again. sí?" eli spoke firmly as both girls frowned.

"why? mami what happened?" alexia questioned as the older woman sighed, both girls taking their seats at the table across from her again. "when your sister left school, she drifted from her friends. nothing bad, but she worked and had different interests and schedule availability than they did. but mariona did not take it well." eli started to explain.

"she invited fresa to a party saying she missed her and wanted to reconnect, i dropped her there and everything seemed fine. your sister called me a few hours later and she was very upset, i picked her up and she wouldn't tell me what happened at first." eli sighed with a shake of her head.

"what happened mami?" alba asked quietly.

"your sister was seeing someone, only for a little while but she liked her a lot, it was her first girlfriend. mariona and this girl told her at the party in front of everyone it was all a bet to embarass her, the girl said she never liked her, everyone laughed at her and she left." eli finished with another deep sigh.

"they grew up together, they were best friends. how could she do that?" alba asked in disbelief as alexia sat beside her seething. "why does a sixteen year old girl do anything nena? teenagers can be cruel." eli smiled sadly as alba hummed.

"i will kill her." alexia stated with a determined nod, rising to her feet as eli scoffed. "you will do no such thing and you will not mention a word of this to your sister! sit down and promise me alexia." eli warned sternly as the blonde locked eyes with her, eli raising an eyebrow daring her to argue.

"prometo." alexia mumbled, sinking back down into her seat. "why didn't she tell us? she used to tell us everything." alba spoke up now as alexia sat back with her arms crossed and a stormy look on her face.

"she did, and then you both stepped away and fresa had to find other people to go to. those girls might be older but they are her friends, they were there for your hermana through all of that. they have looked after her and helped her in the ways i would have expected you both to, they are good girls and good friends to fresa." eli's tone was swift as again, needing to cut into both her daughters in front of her.

"but they aren't her sisters mami, we are. she's supposed to come to us, so we can protect her and look after her." alexia grumbled, still with a face like thunder, a slight jealousy brewing in her eyes.

"sí, but you have not done either of those things lately alexia and if you want to fix this then you need to admit that to yourself and own it. your sister had to find other ways to protect herself and other people to care about her when she felt like both of you stopped." eli raised her voice slightly now as alba shrunk into her seat wracked with guilt and alexia's hardened gaze fell to the ground.

"she tried to come to you and i watched her be hurt and dismissed by both of you and i will always regret not stepping in sooner. but i am stepping in now and if you both do not want to lose her forever, make the effort, do the work and fix this."

~

you waved goodbye to your friends as you arrived to the front door, rummaging around in your hoodie pocket for your keys, shoving them into the lock and stepping inside as your friends peeled off having waited until you got inside safely.

when you heard the tv you shook your head with a smile, closing and locking the door behind you as your keys dropped into the bowl with a clink.

"mami i told you not to wait u-" you fell silent as you rounded the corner and realised it was in fact not your mami sat awake, but rather both of your older sisters were staring back at you, a movie playing in front of them which neither seemed to be paying much attention to.

"oh, you're not mami." you mumbled, giving them a suspicious once over. but before you could even blink suddenly two taller bodies were pressed against you and you tensed at the unwanted and unexpected contact.

"qué es esto?" you asked, arms pinned down to your sides as your sisters clearly attempted to force you into some sort of group hug. "get off!" you huffed, trying to push them off or wiggle away to no avail.

"just hug us." alba demanded as you rolled your eyes and managed to shove her away, darting out of alexia's reach as she grabbed for you next. "you are both so weird." you grunted out with a scowl, hovering in the hallway.

"why are you still here anyway? do you not have your own homes to go to." you rolled your eyes once you had, shoving your hands into the pocket of your hoodie.

"you know at one point we used to live here, it was our home too fresa." alba spoke up first with an amused smile which only soured your mood. "yeah used to." you mumbled under your breath.

"and i told you both to stop calling me that." you spoke up louder now with a small huff. "since its miraculously your home again you can both show yourselves out then." you rolled your eyes yet again and turned to head off to your own room.

"fres-no wait, por favor." alexia called out as you stopped, shoulders dropping as again you looked toward them. "we waited up and thought you might want to watch a movie? we could stay over and all hang out." alexia asked perking up hopefully as alba nodded in agreement and sent you a smile.

"why would i want to to do that?" you replied bluntly, raising an eyebrow as you looked coldly back to both of them. "pequeña we know we have not been around or been there for you like we should have been lately, we want to fix that." alba started gently as your eyebrows furrowed.

"oh sí? you do?" you perked up as if interested as both of your sisters both brightened. "well i don't, i told you both the other night. stay out of my life!" your fake enthusiasm dropped as your eyes narrowed into a glare.

"hermanita por favor we-" alba again continued as you scoffed and shook your head, taking a step forward and cutting her off. "i am not your fresca or your chiqui or your pequeña or your hermanita. i am not a little kid anymore, the two of you made sure of that." you spoke so coldly it was near unrecognisable.

"what is that supposed to mean?" alexia frowned as you barked out a laughter which was anything but humerous. "i think you know exactly what it means. i am not stupid, i am smarter than both of you and i do not need your pity or your guilt now your heads are out of your asses!" you snapped, fists balled by your side.

"your friends cannot replace us even if you try nena, we are your sisters by blood. you will not succeed in pushing us away." alexia spoke holding her head a little higher as you snickered in disbelief.

"oh i am pushing you away am i ale? i am pushing you? would you like me to push you alexia?" you stepped forward and shoved at her chest, the towering girl barely moving as her hands grabbed yours.

"get off!" you hissed trying to pull your hands free. "no. i love you and i will fix this, we both will." alexia's voice wavered for just a moment as you fought her to let you go as she just attempted to bring you into a hug.

"quítate de encima!" you yelled now, your chest growing tighter with anxiety and feeling like a cornered animal as your sisters strong arms refused to let you go. "alexia." alba warned quietly, catching her eye as alexia shook her head.

"no! i love you. i love you vale? i am so sorry for not showing it and making you feel like i did not fresa. i love you mi hermanita!" alexia let go of your hands and grabbed at your face, forcing your eyes to lock with hers.

with a broken grunt you wrenched them away and shoved her again, catching her off guard as she stumbled backward and grabbed the corner of the counter to stop from falling over.

"hey hey, take a breath chiqui por favor, lets all just calm down." alba tried to coo at you, stepping closer as you instantly recoiled and shook your head. "why won't you listen!" you yelled at her now, chest heaving to try and force back the sob which wanted to rip free from it.

"i am not a baby anymore. you want to fix things? you love me? you miss me and suddenly want to hang out with me? ask me questions about my life? as if you suddenly care?" you could only whisper out now as hot tears began to pool at the corner of your eyes and you angrily wiped them away with the back of your hand.

"hija." your head whipped sideways to see eli stood a few feet away with a concerned gaze as you wordlessly shook your head. "no. no! no. vete a la mierda!" you spat venomously at the two older girls and took another step back still shaking your head.

"you both have no idea what it is like to go from having a home filled with laughter and love and noise to nothing. one day we were all living here and it was happy and i was happy and you both cared about me. we ate dinner together, we went to watch barca, we would stay up late watching movies and go for drives. but then the next suddenly it was just me here, just me." you started, swallowing hard as your nails buried crescent shaped dents into your palms where your fists were tightly clenched by your side.

"I had to watch the two of you grow closer and closer, going on trips together, out for dinners, to concerts, eating meals at each others houses, to football games together when ale was injured, through a phone screen." you continued, everyone else stunned to silence at the outburst which eli had feared was a long time coming

"when i felt you both pulling away i tried reaching out. for months i tried calling, texting, i barely got one word replies or your voicemails. i posted photo after photo after photo of me hanging out with friends just so you might see and invite me to hang out with either one of you!" you confessed, again angrily wiping away a few stray tears.

"you don’t come over for family dinners anymore but you always seem to be eating at each others houses without me, you didn’t even notice I stopped coming to your stupid football games alexia, and you didn’t even notice we haven’t gone for breakfast in months when we used to go every single sunday alba, every one!" your voice raised again as you swallowed down a hard lump and continued.

"but why would you notice? i am just a-what was it ale? a stupid, selfish little accident." you growled as your sister rapidly shook her head.

"no no no mi pequeña por favor i did not mean it, no no no lo siento mucho i did not mean it, promesa." again your eldest sister surged forward to cup your face in her hands, heart breaking at how small and defeated you suddenly looked. "off!" you harshly pushed her away and shook your own head.

"you meant it, and you knew it would hurt me and thats why you said it. at least own that alexia, own it!" you yelled those final two words so hard your throat started to hurt, exhaling shakily.

"my entire life i have done nothing but look up to both of you. i have held you both on a pedestal for years and i wanted to be just like you. i looked at you like super heros por el amor de dios!" you laughed as a sob got caught and came out more like you were choking.

"but then you left me behind and suddenly i did not matter, my life did not interest you, i was not old enough or cool enough or whatever to gain any of your time or care anymore. you both left me here all by myself without a single word! you. left. me." you worked to choke out, fighting to catch your breath as your body shook.

"when you both left everything I did was to try and get you to want to spend time with me again. i played tennis so you might come and watch my games and be proud of me alexia, you never came. i did art so you might see and want to come to a class with me alba, you never did. i forced myself to grow up and try to seem like I was more than just your annoying little hermanita, so you might look at me like a friend and want to hang out sometimes." you shook your head, the tears now flowing freely and leaving a salty bitter taste in your mouth as you spoke.

"but none of it worked and I watched you two grow closer while i never felt further away. so my friends are older but they care about me, they want me around and they ask about my day and they invite me on trips and out for dinners and we go get lunch and we have sleepovers and watch movies and go to the beach and go for drives late at night singing to the radio." you listed off not even pausing to take a breath.

"all the things I used to crave the two of you wanting to do with me like we used to but you never did. so I filled that void, and i no longer care what either of you think. i grew up, by myself. i have my own life, my own support system of friends that love me and want to spend time with me. who know what i like and remember my interests and actually ask me about them because they care not because they suddenly feel what? guilt? hermana's there is no need. i had my time to be hurt, and let me tell you it hurt to watch the two of you leave me behind and ice me out when i did not even know why or what i did." you laughed again, a hauntingly broken noise which echoed around the otherwise dim and silent living room.

"so no. i do not want to watch a movie with you or be interrogated at dinner with a million questions of my life because neither of you can bother to call me or see me or care about what i am doing. i want you both to listen to me, know how much you hurt me, and just like you have been, i want you to leave. me. alone." your voice once again cracked on that final word as you spun around and all but sprinted to your room, slamming your door and sinking down against it with your head in your hands.

"i need you both to leave, now." eli spoke up quietly breaking the thick, uncomfortable and unbearable tension which had festered around the room, your sisters stunned to silence for once in their lives.

"mami-" alexia started, voice hoarse and croaky as eli shook her head and pointed to the door. "go." she ordered, refusing to meet either of their eyes which desperately bore toward her seeking any sort of comfort or solace, a gentle reminder that this would all be okay, that you could all work it out.

but they recieved nothing.

so with heads bowed and tears edging at the corners of their eyes they did as they were asked, eli only finally looking up once she heard the front door close and a car engine start, locking the door and hurrying to your room.

"oh mi preciosa." eli sighed, slowly opening your door and finding you curled into a ball on your bed, body wracked with sobs silenced into the pillow pressed against your face.

the moment you felt the bed dip you sat up and all but launched into her awaiting arms, breathing ragged and broken as you struggled to try and stop the tears which seemed to have burst like a dam.

eli's heart broke both at the sight of you and the realization of just how deep these new cracks ran within her daughters as she pressed soft kisses into your hairline and hugged you tightly.

"todo saldrá bien nena, te lo prometo."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

part three

[mbsneur]

Casual Sex

Misa Rodriguez x Reader

Summary: You met Misa because of Jenni. You have casual sex very often but you don't feel good anymore?

Warnings: Smut,Sub!reader,oral,fingering, names like „Amore“ and „good girl“

WC: 1304

please read this text before going to the story please don't be so strict with me but rather write to me what I can do better or what you wished were different. also tell me if you find the story too long or too short.. Also write to me if you liked it. My requests are always open (and English is not my first language so don't be mad at me) and if you have any ideas for the future about who I should write please tell me… the topics I will choose by myself unless you have a request for one or two people I will Read everything.. in the next survey I will take a few ideas from the old survey and new ones…. now read and I hope you like it <33

Real Madrid lost the El Clásico against rivals Barça as so often again Misa stood in front of your door frustrated and angry and fucked you in every direction

You have been friends with Jenni since childhood and last month she took you to a party where there were several Spanish people and where you also met Misa

even after 6 orgasms she was still lying between your legs your whole body was weak and shaking you saw Misas Strong arms around your thighs to keep them apart. She kissed the inside of your thighs and you saw her sweaty hair sticking to her forehead. With every kiss, your legs twitched and Misa had a smug smile in return

you are still dripping from your previous orgasm misa gets higher and higher with her mouth and licks a large stripe from your hole to your clit your legs close and you twitch you try to push misa away but she squeezes tightly around your thighs holding you in place "Misa I can't take another one, I can't feel my legs anymore"

"psht amore you can, I know you can, don't you want to be my good girl?"

„yeah mi-„

"So you see, you're going to take what I give you mh"

misa's head returns to your core she places soft kisses on your clit making you cry out misa starts sucking and brings one of her fingers to your hole and circles it gently your hips rock into her mouth and you whimper "baby please don't tease" Misa smiles and inserts a finger inside you. You start to get louder and louder and Misa hits all the right spots inside you. She curls her fingers and sucks on your clit. You breathe quickly and your pelvis rises Misa squeezes your stomach with her other hand to keep you in place. You get louder "fuck misa right there" you moan and your eyes roll into your head sweat forms on your chest and you get closer to where misa wants you "Will you cum for me pretty girl?" She asks and now pumps two fingers into your dripping hole. You can hear how wet you are "baby you are going to make me cum I want to cum on your fingers like a good girl please misa" you literally screamed misa now started sucking your clit harder and your legs started shaking you scream and cum all over misa's face your Legs close around her head and she helps you through your orgasm. She only removes her fingers when she is sure you have survived it

Misa moves away from you and comes up to you. She gently kisses your shoulder and whispers in your ear "I knew you could, my good girl" then she gets up, takes her things and starts to get dressed. You don't feel good about the fact that Misa always just comes to you to fuck you and then leaves again as if nothing had ever happened. You felt like that like an object for her you watch her, with every step her stomach tenses she renews her bun and looks for her sports bra in the room "do you want to go already Misa?" you ask her, she has found her sports bra and while she is putting on her clothes she looks at you briefly. You are lying there with your head leaning on your arm, watching the sweaty Misa. "Yes, I'm going, I'm tired. I'll call you when I see you again or I need it or i just come here" she says without batting an eyelash and sternly as if she's paying you to sleep with her somehow it's not what you want from Misa "I thought we'd take a shower together or eat together, I can make you tapas You always like them so much when I make them," you say quietly and you're embarrassed to ask "I don't have time for that, no, I'll take a shower at home." She puts on her shoes and is kind of rushed. She takes the rest of her things with her With a "see you" she slams the door and leaves you naked and tired from sex

You pull yourself together and take a hot bath. You don't really know what to think about it or what you feel or whether you want to talk to Misa about it. You don't want it to be over either because Misa actually has so much love and care in her You have often noticed when you were sick and she came here and brought you things to help you get better or she invited you to her games or went to one with you. You never talked about love, it was always just friendship and sex. casual sex.

Misa has become different. She doesn't take you anywhere anymore or is caring towards you. She only comes here to have sex with you and then leaves again. u want to feel Misa differently. u want to feel her love?

The next day

You were at work like every day. Misa wrote to you early in the morning asking if she could come over later. She misses your taste, You knew she had training. You had ignored her message through the day to do your work. You arrived home around 4pm You bought groceries and were about to put them away. You took a quick shower and sat on the couch without saying a word to Misa or answering her all day. Around 10pm a loud knock on your door broke you out of your drowsy mood

You rub your eyes and actually wanted to ignore it until there was another knock, with a loud sigh You got up and ran to the door and opened it. Who else should be standing there but Misa. She greeted you with a smile and without you being able to ask her go come in or you could close the door, her lips were against your neck "mis-" “Amore why don’t you answer me all day” she whispers between kisses against your skin "misa stop" You push her away and she looks at you confusingly, raising her arms to the height of her chest "Que pasa y/n" You sigh and close your arms in front of you. You swallow "Misa I feel like an object for you where is the Misa who goes out with me invites me to matches or holds me in her arms I feel like a woman you pay" Misa's gaze softens and she can hear the frustration in your voice "I thought I didn't want that- I thought we were just people who had casual sex. I never wanted to hurt you. Did you fall in love with me?" she says stuttering You look at her and say nothing. You don't want to answer because you don't know the answer

oh wow i hope you like it, tell me your opinion

thank you <3

[bcacstuff]

Diana Gabaldon (news Book 10 incl. title)

GOOD OMENS

Well, first things first—

A Very (slightly ex post facto…) Happy Birthday to Sam Heughan! When he was first cast to play Jamie Fraser, I noted that he was born on April 30th, while Jamie’s birthday is May 1st—one on either side of the Beltane fire.

Beltane is the Celtic fire festival that marks the beginning of summer, so plainly a time of good omens. As it turned out, it was indeed a time of good omens for All Things Outlander, so it seems an appropriate time to offer up two bits of (what I assume will be) further Good News. One on either side of the fire, as it were…

The newly recorded audiobook of OUTLANDER, recorded by Kristin Atherton (the lovely actress who played the “mature” version of Jenny Murray in Season Seven), was released just yesterday, and I’m pleased to see that so many people already are excited about it and delighted with the quality.

(This in no way denigrates the wonderful Davina Porter, who has read all the Outlander novels, through GO TELL THE BEES THAT I AM GONE. Davina has retired, but all of her recordings will remain available, alongside the new ones.)

[Should you want to check out Kristin’s new audio version, here’s a link:

https://rbmediaglobal.com/audiobook/9798895949726/... ]

And on the _other_ side of the fire (aka May 1st)…I thought I’d let you know what the title of Book Ten is (so we can stop calling it Book Ten, which is slightly boring…).

First, A Word of Warning: THE BOOK IS NOT FINISHED. IT HAS NO PUB DATE (because the publishers wisely won’t set one until they have the full manuscript in their eager hands).

I AM STILL WRITING IT.

YES, I DO KNOW HOW IT ENDS.

NO, I’M NOT TELLING YOU.

NO, YOU CAN’T ORDER IT YET, BECAUSE THE PUBLISHERS DON’T HAVE PAGES SET UP FOR ORDERS BECAUSE THERE IS NO PUB DATE AND BECAUSE I HAVEN’T TOLD THEM WHAT THE BOOK IS CALLED.

Until now. <ahem>

The title of Book Ten of the OUTLANDER series (and yes, this is the final book of the main series, though there may be other companion books and side stories, depending on how long I live…) is

[🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨 Spoilers ahead 🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨]

A BLESSING FOR A WARRIOR GOING OUT

(NO, that doesn’t mean Jamie’s going to die. It’s not a death blessing, it’s the Blessing of St. Michael, said for a warrior about to go and do something important and possibly dangerous. There are quite a few people in this book who qualify for that blessing, believe me…)

It seems only reasonable to append a small sample from near the beginning of the book, but I know that not everyone wants to read bits and pieces, preferring to wait for The Whole Thing. Ergo, here’s another chunk of spoiler space:

[Excerpt from A BLESSING FOR A WARRIOR GOING OUT, Copyright 2025 Diana Gabaldon]

Only a few people had noticed William’s arrival. The post-wedding revelry was well underway, and most of the guests were gathered in clumps near the food tables, talk and laughter rising and falling in volume as the wind shifted in the trees.

One of those who _had_ noticed was Fanny, standing at my elbow.

“_A Dhia_,” she said faintly. Oh, God.

I couldn’t have put it better myself.

Jamie rose slowly from his chair on the porch—not using his stick, I saw—and drew himself up, eyes fixed on William.

William himself was still on his horse, the two of them mud-spattered, windblown and breathing hard. I saw his throat move as he swallowed, evidently preparing to repeat what he’d said a moment before.

_Sir—I need your help_.

But Jamie was moving, going down the steps. I could hear his left knee crack with each step, but he didn’t flinch or limp. He reached William and put a hand on his arm.

“You have it,” he said simply. “Come in.”

[end section]

William came up the steps after Jamie, his hat tucked under his arm. His face was still set in lines of anxious determination, but this relaxed for a moment when he saw me. He paused, and a tinge of warmth touched his eyes.

“Mother Claire,” he said. “I hadn’t—though clearly I should have-- expected you.” His glance flicked past me, taking in the open doorway behind me, the fine, heavy door and the long, broad hallway beyond, lined with Brianna’s sketches and paintings.

“I know,” I said, smiling. “It gives you a bit of a turn, when you see someone out of place, so to speak.”

The corner of his mouth twitched briefly.

“So to speak,” he said, at once acknowledging and dismissing the circumstances in which he had been accustomed to seeing me: As Lord John’s wife. And as quickly as it had come, the warmth disappeared and his jaw set again. Jamie was waiting at the door of his study.

William had just set foot on the threshold when Fanny spoke behind him.

“Will-yum?” she said, her voice clear but uncertain.

He turned to look back, surprised, but then smiled and stepped back on the porch, reaching to take her hands.

“Frances,” he said softly, looking down at her. “There you are.”

“Here I am,” she said, smiling up. She’d blushed when he turned to her, but her brown eyes sparkled. “Shall I take care of your horse for you?”

“Oh.” He glanced down the steps; the horse, a big, muscular bay, was munching grass beside the path, his reins carelessly looped over the hitching rail. William glanced at me, and I made a tiny nod in Fanny’s direction.

“That’s most kind of you, Frances,” he said, and squeezed her hands briefly before letting go. “His name is Trajan and I’m sure he will be as grateful for your welcome as I am.”

She turned at once and skipped down the steps, glowing. William looked after her, the smile still on his face.

“I nearly said, ‘How you’ve grown, Frances!’,” he remarked, _sotto voce_, to me. “But that wouldn’t have done, would it? I always hated it when Papa’s friends would say that to me.”

“It would have gone over like a lead balloon,” I assured him. “She has, though. And her speech is nearly perfect now. “ I glanced over my shoulder; Jamie had gone into the study. “And—er—how _is_ Lord John these days?”

“I wish I knew,” he said, face and voice both suddenly bleak. He took a deep breath and walked past me down the hall.

I didn’t know whether I ought to be present at whatever conversation he was about to have with Jamie, but neither of them had shut the door, so I walked quietly in and went at once to the cupboard where the visitor’s tray was kept, a plain pewter object, but equipped with several shot glasses, a bottle of fairly good whisky and a jug of water.

Jamie met my eyes but didn’t say anything as I set the tray down. He put a glass in front of William, poured a dram and said casually, “Aye, so?”

“It’s concerning my f-- It’s Lord John, sir.”

“_A Dhia_,” Jamie said, with somewhat more force than Fanny had used. He drew a deep breath through his nose. “Where is he? And sit down, my lord,” he added, nodding to a chair.

“I don’t know.” William sat down, adding, “Don’t call me that,” then adding a hasty “if you please, sir,” as an afterthought.

Jamie raised one brow.

“Do ye ken where his lordship may be, Mr. Ransom?” he asked politely.

“No! Goddamn it, if I knew where he was, I would have got him back by now!”

The outburst startled us all, including William, who pressed his lips together.

“I beg your pardon, sir,” he said stiffly. “I—have been searching for…his lordship…for some time—for months. I am somewhat…” he made a brief gesture indicating emotional disturbance, lack of sleep and/or deep fear, and Jamie nodded.

“_Dèrangè_,” he said, in good French. “I expect so. I suppose it wouldna be helpful to ask where ye saw him last?”

“No,” William said dryly. He’d nearly got himself back under control, though, and helped the process along with a slug of whisky. “Though for what it’s worth, I last saw him in the drawing-room of his house in Savannah, on [date]. Later in the day, after I’d left, he received a written message, and whatever it said, it apparently caused him to go immediately to the docks. The cook told me. She was present when he got the message,” he added, “but she didn’t see what it said or whom it was from.”

“Did he tell the cook he was going to the docks?” I asked, and he shook his head.

“No. But he did go there. A whelk-seller on one of the quays said she’d seen a fair-haired man in a good coat, with a soldier’s queue, who’d asked her if there was a ship called “Palace” in the harbor.”

“But if you didn’t know he was going to the docks, why did you look for him there?” I took the bottle and poured a bit more whisky all round; this was clearly going to take some time.

Willie gave me a slightly odd look, as though he might ask me to leave the room, but instead took another mouthful and swallowed it.

“Are either of you familiar with a man named Percival Wainwright? Or, for that matter, the Chevalier St. Honorè?”

Jamie looked blank, but I felt a light, cold touch on the back of my neck, like the caress of a ghost.

“Yes,” I said. “Lord John mentioned him once or twice. He was John’s…step-brother, I think he said. His name isn’t Percival, though; it’s Perseverance. And—”

“Perseverance?” Jamie leaned forward, interested. “A Quaker, is he?”

William cleared his throat and looked down.

“Definitely not,” he said.

“He’s dead, though,” I told Jamie, and William looked up at me.

“He is _now_,” he said.

[end section]

[Photograph is licensed for use through Wikimedia Commons, and was taken at a Beltane celebration by Stub Mandrel, May 4th, 2015.]

[catmiemy]

Another Chance to Live Part 4 (Ana Maria Crnogorčević x Reader)

Summary: Ana and you finally start dating.

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3

A/N: Look at me sticking to my upload schedule. Although I might be able to publish the final two parts earlier since I had more time to write because I had to cancel some plans thanks to conjunctivitis.

I hope you enjoy these two finally getting together. As always, happy to hear what you think :)

After your conversation with Jenni you continued to sit on the couch, staring at your phone as if the device would be any help in figuring out how to ask Ana out.

As it turned out, it actually did. While you were still contemplating, weighing the pros and cons of every option, your phone buzzed with an incoming message. Your heart skipped a bit when you saw it was from Ana, just like it always did. And your heart definitely skipped more than one beat once you read the message.

You read the words over and over again, finding it impossible to believe this was actually happening. For so long you had told yourself there would never be anything more than friendship between you and Ana, and now all of the sudden your whole world had been turned upside down in the best way possible.

A little birdie just told me about the conversation you had.

Hope you don’t mind she told me.

Jenni said you didn’t tell her not to tell me, so she thought it was fair game.

Anyway, what do you say about changing our hangout tomorrow to an official date?

You know as a date, as more than friends.

Ana’s reply was almost instant.

Of course I don’t mind, it makes my life a lot easier!

I really owe that birdie, but don’t tell her that.

And yes, I’d love to do that!

You quickly texted back that you were excited about it as well, before putting away your phone grinning like a fool.  You felt like you were floating on a cloud of happiness, something that you hadn’t experience in a long, long time, maybe never to this degree.  

Great, I’ll pick you up at 7 tomorrow.

Already looking forward to it.

---

The next day you got more and more nervous the closer the time for Ana to pick you up came. However, whenever the anxiety threatened to become overwhelming, you just thought about the Swiss woman; how happy you always were in her presence and how at ease she made you feel, as if you were perfect just the way you were. Every time you did that you immediately felt much calmer; less anxious nervous and much more joyful excited. 

 Still, it took you forever to pick out an outfit, mentally thanking Ana that she had texted you earlier in the day to at least let you know what style of clothes you should be wearing, elegant but not overly fancy. In the end you settled on a black dress because you could never go wrong with that, and it did show off your body in the best way possible.

Even with all the internal debating about your outfit you ended up being ready almost 30 minutes before the pickup time, because you had started so early. Therefore you settled down on the couch, trying and failing to distract yourself with your phone.

Only a few minutes passed before there was a knock on the door. With a frown you went to open it, hoping it wasn’t your parents with some sort of request to help them out. You definitely didn’t have time to do that right now.

However, when you opened the door and laid eyes on Ana your frowned turned into a big smile. You were always happy to see her, but tonight even more so. Finally you got to be with her in the way you wanted, no more pretending to be just friends.

“Hi,” you greeted her, too distracted by the blonde’s mere presence to wonder why she was here so early.

“Hi,” Ana echoed, stepping forward to hug you. You melted into the embrace and turned your face inwards against her neck, relishing in the fact that you didn’t have to suppress gestures like this any longer.

“Ready to go?” The Swiss woman asked you after a bit.

You nodded, grabbing the bag you had conveniently placed next to the door. When you turned back towards Ana, she reached out offering you her hand. You instantly laced your fingers through hers, the small contact filling you with warmth and an overwhelming sense of belonging right there in this moment.

When you were getting into the car you heard the church bells ring and suddenly realized how early the Swiss woman had been. It wasn’t like she was known for being unpunctual, but also she wasn’t usually this early.

“How come you were here this early? Did I have the time wrong?”

That seemed like the most logical explanation, even though you had checked the time in Ana’s text about at dozen times.

“Well, I knew you’d be ready early and I didn’t want to make you wait unnecessarily and maybe get anxious.”

Your heart melted at this. It was so thoughtful of Ana and it showed how well she already knew you. This fact put you even more at ease. There was no need to pretend or try to show yourself in the most favorable light, this woman already knew you and somehow she still liked you.

“Plus I was excited to go out with my friend,” the blonde continued.

For a second your stomach dropped at the last word, but when you looked over and saw the humor in Ana’s eyes you recognized that she was just teasing you.

“I guess I deserve that,” you conceded, “And for the record I never wanted you to be just my friend.”

You were a little surprised by your own boldness. However, Ana made you feel like it was not only okay to say what you were thinking, but that it was in fact exactly what the Swiss woman wanted.

“That’s good to know,” Ana stated, sounding much more serious all of the sudden as if she still hadn’t been totally sure about your feelings.

Suddenly you felt a little silly for not taking into account that other people got insecure as well. You had been so focused on yourself, that you had never considered how it must have been for the Swiss woman to constantly hear you emphasize that you were merely friends.

“I’m sorry about that, I just didn’t think there was any possibility you’d ever like me too,” you apologized.

Ana looked over at you sadly. “I know, but we’ll work on that,” she promised.

“On what?”

“On the way you see yourself! Don’t think I missed how you didn’t believe me when I told you that everyone I know on the Spanish national team likes you and is always looking forward to seeing you,” the blonde elaborated.

You didn’t quite know how to react to such blatant flattery. Most likely this was just Ana being sweet, but you couldn’t lie, it was still nice to hear.

“See, you’re doing it again. You don’t believe me,“  the blonde accused you softly.  

You whipped your head around to look at Ana, shocked that she could read you so easily. Up until now you had always prided yourself on having a good poker face, but apparently the Swiss woman saw right through it.

She didn’t say anything else though, merely smiling at you gently. The silence gave you the time you needed to gather your thoughts. Once again you found yourself being surprisingly honest.

“It’s just because I’m nothing special, I’m just me. I’m too quiet and not very interesting. It’s not like I think everyone hates more or anything. But why would anyone particularly like me?”

In your opinion you had made a good point, but Ana’s eyes were filled with disapproval and sadness on your behalf.

“Because you’re a great person! You always have an open ear for everyone. If there’s anything you can do to help someone, you do it without hesitation. You have such a good heart and you’re so mindful of everyone around you, doing your best to make everyone feel seen and heard.”

“Sure you don’t talk everyone’s ears off as soon as you meet them, but once you’re more comfortable? You tell great stories that always make me feel as if I’m right there with you and I love hearing what you think about things because I can tell that you took your time to form opinions. And to see you speak passionately about the things you care, that’s just something else!”

“Also, I love how much you appreciate the beauty around you. Going somewhere with you is such a treat because you will always point out the pretty flowers, the interesting cloud constellation or the cute dog you see with so much joy and reverence.”

“And let’s not forget that you’re gorgeous. You have the most beautiful and kindest eyes I have ever seen and don’t even get me started about your smile!”

You were overwhelmed by how easily, without even thinking about it first, the Swiss woman managed to list all of these nice qualities. It made you more inclined to believe her. At the very least Ana had you convinced that she meant every word she had said, and that in itself was a good feeling, even if you weren’t convinced all of this was actually, objectively true.

“I could keep talking all night long about all the reasons why I like you so much, but I guess you wouldn’t really appreciate that. So instead I’ll keep bringing it up for as long as you’ll let me be a part of your life, which I’m hoping will be a very long time,” Ana concluded.

“That’s probably a good idea, otherwise you’ll spend the rest of the evening with a tomato head,” you joked.

You had always hated how easily you turned red, your frustration usually only making it worse.

“I wouldn’t complain about that for a second, I find your blushing adorable,” Ana commented, which of course only made you blush even more, but for once you didn’t mind as much.

You arrived at your destination soon after, and you immediately recognized the place from pictures you had seen of Lola and her girlfriend. So the mystery of how the blonde had chosen where to take you was solved. You had never actually been to the restaurant yourself since it was very romantic and mostly frequented by couples, but you had heard good things about it.

By the end of the evening you could definitely confirm that all the praise you had been told about the restaurant was justified. Although in all honesty every place would have felt like heaven to you when it was the location of your first date with Ana.

The conversation stayed mostly light and happy for the first half and hour, both of you enjoying each other’s company and this new and exciting situation. In a lot of ways it wasn’t all that different, you talked as easily as before, the conversation flowing effortlessly. So once again you realized that you had gotten into your heard for nothing. Things weren’t awkward or weird at all, like you had been concerned about.

Sure, there were some differences, all of them positive though; the way you kept slipping from normal conversation into light flirting, how you just gazed deep into each other eyes a few of times, and the way Ana placed her hand onto yours and left it there as long as she possibly could, sighing when she had to retract it because you both needed your hands to eat.

“So do you want to talk about the national team?” You asked, once the last of your nervousness had settled.

Ana shrugged her shoulders unsurely, smile dropping from her face. You had to fight the urge to take it back and apologize for probing; reminding yourself about the conversation you had had after the game against Barcelona. It was okay to ask, and if the Swiss woman actually didn’t want to talk about it, she would tell you. Still, this went entirely against your instinct.

“It’s just such a frustrating situation. Inka is a horrible coach! At least for us, maybe it’s just not a good fit, I don’t know, but for us it doesn’t work. We’re playing badly and the atmosphere at camp isn’t how it used to be. Don’t get me wrong, it’s nothing like what I heard about Spain, but everyone was kind of in a state of constant annoyance and was so happy when we could leave.”

“And the worst thing is that the home Euros is coming closer everyday and I wanted that to be the crowning moment of my career. Maybe that’s selfish, I don’t know, but now? Now I think it’s going to be nightmare, if I even get to go at all,” Ana finished her rant that had began passionate and angry, but fizzled out into something more like helplessness. 

Exactly like after the game against Barcelona the Swiss woman looked drained, her shoulders slumped and her smile no longer reaching her eyes. It made you simultaneously want to give her the longest hug in the world and go and punch Inka in the face.

However, since you were still sitting in the restaurant you settled on reaching over and giving her hand a good squeeze, before doing your best to come up with a good response.

“I’m so sorry things are like that and I’m always here to listen if you need to rant about it or hold you if you need to cry. Trying to keep in your emotions isn’t healthy.”

That was probably one of the most hypocritical things you had ever said, you who always held your emotions in until you felt like imploding. However, theoretically you knew that wasn’t a helpful thing to do, so you weren’t going to advise someone else to do that.

“And I can help you figure out if there’s anything you and the girls can do. I did a lot of reading and looking things up when everything was going down with Spain. Of course it’s a totally different system, but I’m still happy to help out,” you offered.

A soft smile, a real smile, one that made Ana’s eyes shine, returned to the blonde’s face.

“I appreciate how much you care. That means more than I can ever express with words. To be honest we’ve already started looking into what our options are and have been talking with the Swiss federation. So maybe it’s not quite as hopeless as it feels right now. The next few weeks should give us an answer to that,” Ana told you.

You felt some relief at that. Surely there was no way the Swiss federation would be as difficult and idiotic as the Spanish one. Right? Therefore things would hopefully be sorted out before too long and Ana would get the home Euros she deserved.

“That’s good. I’m confident things will turn out okay,” you said with more confidence than you actually felt. But Ana didn’t need to know that. If you were wrong in the end you would deal with it then, right now the best thing you could do was strengthen her hope.

“Yeah?” The Swiss woman double-checked, confirming to you that this was actually the right thing to do.

“Definitely,” you assured her, praying to a god you didn’t believe in that you wouldn’t be proven wrong.

“I think so too,” Ana admitted quietly, as if she was scared to say it too loudly out of fear of jinxing it.

“Now let’s talk about other things. I don’t want Inka to ruin the mood on my date as well, she has done enough of that during camp. How about we focus on your national camp instead? I heard you almost made Jenni rip out her own hair with your cluelessness,” the Swiss woman teased with a big grin.

Your first instinct was to tell Ana that it was totally fine to keep talking about the situation with her national team, that it wouldn’t ruin anything. But then she mentioned Jenni and all the teasing you had endured, and all of the sudden you wanted to beg her to continue talking about the Swiss team. Anything to avoid speaking about how oblivious you had been.

“Come on, let’s be honest Jenni would never rip out her precious hair or do anything else to ruin her looks,” you deflected, basking in the sound of Ana’s laughter. You would never get tired of making the blonde laugh.

You kept up the banter for a bit, before you remembered a specific thing you had been fretting about for the last 24 hours. It probably wasn’t something you should bring up on the first date, or maybe it was exactly the kind of thing you had to mention on the first date. You still hadn’t made up your mind about that.

All you knew was that in that moment, feeling happy and secure in Ana’s presence, you wanted to talk about it. And maybe it was time to do what you wanted more often and worry less about whether it was the ‘normal’ thing to do. What was normal anyway?

“There’s something I need to tell you”, you blurted out, kicking yourself for making it sound so ominous. No one ever said ‘I need to tell you something’ about unimportant stuff.

“Of course, I’m all ears,” Ana replied, smiling at you encouragingly.

“Okay, so…” You swallowed, trying to gather yourself. „I’ve never been in a serious relationship before. I mean I’ve dated and had flings and such, but never a serious long term relationship. And I don’t know it that’s a problem for you. I would totally understand if it was. And maybe I shouldn’t even have brought it up tonight, so I’m sorry if I’m making this awkward. Although if it is a problem then it was probably good I told you today. I…”

“Schatz,” Ana interrupted you. You didn’t really know any German, let alone Swiss German, but you were fairly certain you remembered this one. The use of a sweet pet name relaxed you significantly; she wouldn’t do that if this was in fact a deal breaker.

“I don’t care about that in the slightest. I’ve never been in a relationship with you either, so that will be brand new for me too. We’ll figure it out together,” the Swiss woman promised.

“Together,” you echoed. You loved the sound of that.

---

As time passed and more dates followed it became clear that Ana had been right. Things between the two of you just progressed naturally and not once did you feel out of your depth because of your lack of experience with relationships.

You shared a magical first kiss on a walk through the city after your second date. Ana’s lips felt pleasantly warm on yours in the chilly night air. After that all dams were broken and you spent a lot of time kissing like two hormonal teenagers, slowly or more precisely pretty rapidly moving on to other activities.

After the first time you slept together, the two of you lay in Ana’s bed facing each other. The Swiss woman gently traced her thumb over your forehead and your cheek, looking at you lovingly. Although you did your best to avoid using this word for anything to do with Ana just yet. It was too early to even think about love.

“Are you okay? Was this okay?” The blonde whispered, her eyes serious and for some reason slightly worried.

You stared at her in surprise. Could she not see how happy and satisfied you were, how cherished and lo- adored you felt?

“This was perfect and I feel amazing. You know I had sex before, right?”

Suddenly you weren’t sure if you had been clear about that. Maybe you had given Ana the impression that you weren’t just a relationship virgin, but an all around virgin.

“Yeah, yeah, I know, but still this is a big step and I just wanted to check in. It’s different when feelings are involved,” Ana elaborated.

For a moment you just grinned at her like an idiot. If you thought you had been feeling lo-, adored before, it was nothing to how you felt now.

“You’re just the absolute sweetest, tesoro. And you’re totally right, it is different. So much better! I can’t wait to go again, but right now I need some sleep. Someone wore me out.“

You looked at her pointedly, but that quickly changed into a smile when you saw how proud of herself Ana looked.

“In that case, sleep, mi Schatz. Because I definitely need you to be ready for another round soon,” Ana said, pulling you against her and kissing your forehead.

It took you all of five seconds before you fell into a peaceful slumber, your face buried in Ana’s neck.

---

However, you were right too, about everything sorting itself out with the Swiss national team. You were eating lunch at Real’s training ground when you heard, willing the time to move faster because tonight you would finally see Ana again. The two of you hadn’t been able to meet up the last few days because of insanely busy and conflicting schedules.

So when your phone buzzed with a message from Ana your heart fluttered happily. Hearing from her was always the highlight of your day. Things at Real were still less than ideal. You didn’t feel connected to the team, most of them still seeing you as ‘that Altético player’.

You were well aware that you were to blame for that as much as anyone, maybe even more so. Your efforts to integrate into the team had been minimal to say the least. And you felt a fair bit of anger at yourself for being so unprofessional, but somehow that still wasn’t enough to change anything. You just didn’t want to be there. It was as simple as that. And you could pretend, but you couldn’t change your actual feeling.

Day after day you forced yourself to be perfectly punctual, train hard, listen to the game plans and analyses, but there was no joy to any of it. Not even when you played games, something that you had always loved before. You were simply going through the motions.

At least you were having a pretty good season; otherwise your disappointment with yourself would have been through the roof.

When you checked your phone you saw that it was a screenshot announcing Inka’s departure from the Swiss national team. A happy squeal escaped you, everyone turning to look at you. It wasn’t like you to be loud, especially not in a cheerful way.

“What is it?” Misa asked curiously.

You simply showed her your phone, a smile appearing on the goalkeeper’s face.

“This is great news,” she agreed.

“Amazing news,” you corrected.

Now you were even more excited to see Ana later that night and celebrate this special occasion.

You were happy that you had decided to meet up at your place; this gave you the opportunity to prepare something special. However, you didn’t have much time, so you found yourself standing in the store after training looking around frantically and blanking on what to do.

The first idea that came to mind was to get a cake with a message like ‘She’s gone!’ on it. But you seriously doubted that you would get one on such short notice. Also a whole cake for just the two of you didn’t sound like a good plan.

So maybe just a card? What kind of card though? You had some strong suspicions that there wasn’t anything like an ‘I’m so happy you got rid of your stupid national coach’-card. 

You could practically feel the seconds ticking by, getting more and more anxious by the minute. Time was running out and you still didn’t have the slightest idea what to do.

Noticing how tense you had become you forced yourself to exhale slowly and relax your body, starting with your jaw and slowly progressing downwards. There was no reason to get so stressed about this. Ana wouldn’t expect any grand gestures; you wouldn’t disappoint here no matter what you did or didn’t do.

As you calmed down the fog in your brain lifted and you regained the ability to make decisions. After having a swift look around you settled on buying the ingredients for Ana’s favorite meal, as well as two caramel cupcakes. As a last minute decision you added two candles to put on the cupcakes, one an I and one a G. This way you could literally get the satisfaction of seeing Inka Gring’s legacy go up in smoke.

Later that evening Ana arrived at your apartment with a bright smile on her face and some extra pep in her steps. She immediately pulled you into a tight hug, rocking the both of you excitedly from side to side.

“I’m so happy for you,” you told her, leaning back slightly to beam at her, before getting closer again and peppering her face with light kisses. 

This made Ana giggle. “And you know what makes me happy?” She gasped.

You stopped your kisses and tilted your head, unsure of where the Swiss woman was going this. It didn’t seem like the kind of question she would ask if the answer was the obvious one; Inka leaving.  

“That you are so happy for me. It means the world  to me that you care so deeply, about both the good and the bad things happening in my life,” Ana clarified.

A blush cropped up on your face and you moved to hide your face in Ana’s neck, but the Swiss woman gently stopped you

“Don’t. You know I love your blush,” she murmured, placing her hands on your slightly pink cheeks and taking in every inch of your face. “So beautiful.”

Of course that only made you blush more. Ana winked at you, but didn’t stop you when you once again stepped forward to bury your face in her shoulder.

The two of you spent a nice evening together; spirits were high all around thanks to the good news. Ana showered you in compliments for your cooking and when you brought out the cupcakes she burst into laughter.

“I love this! Like a cleansing from Inka,” she said in between laughing.

“Shhh, this is a serious matter,” you chastised her playfully.

“Oh sorry,” the blonde replied, forcing a solemn expression onto her face.

However, it only lasted for all of five seconds before the huge smile that had been on her face all night long returned. You wouldn’t be complaining about that though. A happy Ana made you happy.

“To the end of the unfortunate Inka-area and to a better future for your national team,” you announced, lighting the two candles on fire. “Make a wish!”

Ana leaned forward and blew out the candles with closed eyes. Then she turned to you. “Do you want to know what I wished for?”

You shook your head firmly. “No! Otherwise it won’t come true.”

Ana smirked. “Too bad because it involves you.”

“Wait really? Then I change my mind and want to know,” you backtracked, mentally running through everything she could have wished for.

“Nope, too late,” the Swiss woman informed you.

“Meeeeeaaaaan,” you complained.

Ana just grinned at you, shrugged her shoulders and took a big bite of her cupcake.

When you continued to pout at her, she offered you a compromise, “Fine, I’ll tell you when it comes true, okay? And now enough with the puppy dog eyes. Otherwise I might crack and tell you right now and then we’ll both be at fault when it doesn’t come true.”

“Sounds good to me,” you agreed, biting into your own cupcake with gusto.

And honestly just knowing that Ana had made a wish that included you warmed you heart. It was nice to be such a big part of someone else’s life, someone other than your parents that was. But you wouldn’t think about them right now, nothing was allowed to taint this moment.

Instead of dwelling on your thoughts you looked up at Ana happily chewing the last bite of her cupcake.

“I love you,” you blurted out without thinking about it.

Once the words had left your mouth you instantly regretted them. Not that they weren’t true, they absolutely were, but you hadn’t said them to each other yet. So what if Ana didn’t feel the same and you just ruined this perfect moment? Or even worse, everything!

At least Ana was still smiling at you, that was probably a good sign. If she was going to leave right then and there she wouldn’t smile. Right?

“I love you too,” the Swiss woman simply said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.  

“Really?” You couldn’t help but ask.

Ana got up and came over to your side of the table. She grabbed your hands, softly pulling you up so you were on eye level.

“Of course I love you. How could I not? I guess we still have some work to do until you see yourself the way I see you, as such an amazing, good-hearted, beautiful person,” she told you earnestly.

“I really love you.” It was the only thing that came to mind, Ana’s compliments once again overwhelming you.

“That’s good because I really love you too,” the blonde replied with a chuckle, gathering you into her arms. “And I won’t rest until you love yourself too , exactly the way that you deserve.”

You just snuggled even closer into Ana, a deep calmness filling you up from head to toe. It wasn’t something you were used to, usually there was always some anxiety running in the background. However, the blonde brought you so much peace.

It was something you had never expected before you experienced it yourself. You had always thought love would be all excited butterflies and exuberance. There was some of that of course, but also this all-encompassing calmness, that was in many ways even better than all of the excitement.

[jjngkook7]

Choices (6)

Werewolf Au! Jungkook x Reader / Enemies to Lovers [Angst and mature content. Not smut but almost smut.]

Summary: Jungkook finally found her. His mate. His lifelong partner. But she’s a human. Does he have to stay with her or can he stick it to whatever and whoever binds mates together and make his own decision? ***THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR YOUR PATIENCE. I PROMISE I WON'T MAKE YOU WAIT THIS LONG AGAIN***

Chapter 1 / Chapter 2 / Chapter 3 / Chapter 4 / Chapter 5

You rang in the new year with some coworkers. The night was a blur of lights, laughter and music. Despite being a lightweight, you didn’t get as drunk as you thought, in fact, you were barely tipsy. It was hard to have fun when your reality didn’t even feel real. You had all the ingredients to drink your heart out: you met who was supposed to be your soulmate, you find out that mythical creatures are real and your best friend in the whole world has been hiding all of this from you for a year. To add more salt to the wound, Jennie spent Christmas and New Years with the pack. Sad wasn’t quite the right word for how you felt, maybe confused or disoriented? You had been in a haze since the last time you saw everyone trying to figure out if the past weeks were real or not.

After Jungkook dropped you back off at the cabin, Namjoon decided that you should leave for your safety. Apparently having someone as unpredictable as Jungkook free from his chains while his mate was hanging out with other men was not a good idea even after you told Namjoon that Jungkook actually saved your life. Namjoon took you home that night and advised you to keep your distance for a while. He seemed sad when he dropped you off and truth be told, you were kind of sad too. You had a fondness for Namjoon because he was the one that made you feel sane and safe throughout this whole journey. You would miss your friendship with him and everyone else.

Your phone pinged, reeling you out of your thoughts. You thew it towards the edge of your bed when you saw that it was just one of those annoying marketing texts. Your eyes then glided towards the Christmas card on your nightstand as it did almost everyday; it was the one artifact you had proving that everything you went through was real. Everyone from the pack had signed the card, all except for one. You reached for the card and ran your fingertips over the glitter covered snowman on the front page. I wonder how he’s doing. Embarrassed didn’t even begin to explain how you felt. You felt like a fool, an actual idiot for still wondering about Jungkook’s wellbeing when he couldn’t even write his name on a stupid Christmas card for you-he probably laughed when Namjoon asked him to contribute. With one last read through of the card, you placed it under your bed and made never thinking about Jungkook again as your new year’s resolution.

__________________________________

Maybe because there was no one to talk to about your new year’s resolution in full but getting over Jungkook was pretty easy. You hadn’t spoken to anyone in the pack in over a month and the memories of them become less and less clear by the day. Was it Jin that helped you with your injuries or Yoongi? Was it Namjoon that drove you home or did Hoseok tag along also? And did you actually feel sparks when Jungkook touched you or was it just your imagination? Either way, it felt good to feel less crazy. It was only when you and Jennie hung out that everything would hit you like a freight train. Seeing her was bittersweet. You were so happy to spend time with your best friend despite your guys’ schedule but you couldn’t help this building of resentment in your chest at the same time. Anger and guilt gnawed at you so raw that replying to her texts took hours to do. Luckily, both of you were so busy with work that seeing each other was few and far between.

One thing you had a really hard time forgetting was the night you had to leave. After Jungkook asked you to wait, you sat by his side and watched him catch his breath. It was hard seeing someone in so much pain despite the lack of physical wounds. Once Jungkook seemed to have a grip on himself, he told you to sit as far away from him as possible while he sat on the other side of the cabin. You remembered feeling like you were naked under his red gaze, like he could see every single movement you made. Jungkook told you that it wasn’t safe for you to leave yet and that you had to wait for a little bit. Unbeknownst to you, Jungkook couldn’t have you leave just yet. A wolf in the midst of his heat finally meeting his mate after being kept away from them was like a ticking time bomb. Jungkook needed to engulf your scent and calm his mind before letting you go back to a cabin full of fully grown men. He was surprised that you complied and that you kept your composure. Sure, he noticed your trembling hands and shortness of breath but you kept calm and collected. Jungkook needed to direct his attention to something else-anything- and so the small talk began. It started off with what you did for work and ended with Jungkook shit talking his pack mates. When Jungkook felt sane enough, he insisted he carry you home to be safe. You remember flinching when a low growl escaped from Jungkook when you hooked your arms around his neck. You felt his body shake as you wrapped your legs around his waist. It took a minute before he was able to hoist you up and get going. You remembered him being gentle and asking if you were all right the whole way back to the cabin. You remembered him letting you down a couple meters in front of the cabin because Namjoon would’ve killed him if he saw Jungkook and you together.

“Are you going to be okay?” you asked.

Jungkook offered you a nod, his bright red eyes doing the soft smile on his face an injustice. Perhaps it was the darkness playing tricks on your eyesight but Jungkook looked bigger. His muscles were more toned, his hair was thicker and his overall aura was just larger. You felt embarrassed drooling over his physique like some school girl despite almost dying a couple hours ago. Namjoon’s voice from inside the cabin redirected your guys’ attention and you suddenly remembered that it was below freezing outside.

“I-I’m going to go inside now,” you reached out your hand to give Jungkook’s arm a reassuring squeeze but retracted remembering how much he ordered you to not touch him, “goodnight.”

To your surprise, Jungkook reached out instead and caressed your face with both his hands. You closed your eyes and leaned into his touch pathetically. Jungkook left out an exhale of both relief and frustration. Every ounce of control he had was quickly slipping through his fingers. He was teetering towards the edge of danger with you right now. You opened your eyes to see Jungkook watching you but not like he did before. Just a couple of hours ago, you felt like a prey under his gaze. This time, he was looking at you like how Taehyung looked at Jennie.

“Do me a favor?” he asked, his voice almost hoarse.

You nodded and scrunched your eyebrows. What could you possibly do for him? Jungkook felt his stomach drop knowing what he was going to ask of you. The warmth that happened when you guys touched intensified as Jungkook brought your body closer to his. He knew he only had a couple minutes to relish your touch before his heat and his reality would take over again.

“I need you to forget about this night,” he finally said. Although subtle, he felt your pressure lift from his hands. “I need you to forget about me, about my pack, about everything. Make it like I never even existed, and I’ll do the same. Trust me, it’s for the best.”

As cruel as his words already were, Jungkook then sealed it by pressing his lips against yours. You couldn’t help but gasp which, he happily swallowed. A surge of electricity pulsed through you as he deepened the kiss. The heat from his body immediately making you forget how cold it was. As gentle as he was, you remembered his body began to tremble and the slight sting against your bottom lip when his fangs unsheathed.

And that was all you wanted to remember. Perhaps you were a masochist. Of all the memories you chose to forget, you just couldn’t let go of this particular one; no one ever really completes their new year’s resolution anyways. You knew you would never get an answer but it didn’t matter anymore. Every time Jennie saw you, she'd try to ask about Jungkook but you would either change the subject or give her vague answers. You didn't want to know more than you already did.

“Goodnight, Sooyoung!” you chimed.

“Goodnight,” Sooyoung replied with a sympathetic smile, “you should leave soon.”

“I will!” you lied, “see you tomorrow morning.”

Sooyoung hovered by your desk for a few more seconds before heading towards the elevator. It was common for you to stay after work but not for this long. You waved at Sooyoung until the elevator doors finally closed. When you were certain that there was no one else in the office, you closed the document you were pretending to work on and slumped against your chair. A tired sigh left your mouth as you roughly ran your hands against your face. Just as you were accepting your new reality, the past week and a half had you re-questioning your sanity. Being at home recently felt eerie. You were constantly checking over your shoulder and hesitant to sleep with your bedroom door closed. The nightmares you were having didn’t help either. Night after night, you would see the same things in your dream: rogue wolves chasing you and a Jungkook bleeding out to top it off. You’d jolt awake in the middle of the night and could only fall back asleep after taking melatonin. With the nightmares being a daily occurrence, the melatonin had stopped taking effect and you were left trying to calm your racing heart on your own. To your disdain, the only place you felt safe was at work. Your office was high up on the 25th floor and security here was pretty strict. You concluded that your paranoia was from these nightmares but those moments when you felt like someone was watching you felt too real to blame on lack of sleep. You put your head down against your desk and stared at the time displayed on your computer. It was nearing 7:45 and you promised yourself that you’d leave at 8pm. As the minutes ticked by, you tried to come up with some sort of game plan to combat another inevitable sleepless night.

____________________________________

“Jungkook!” Taehyung shouted as he kicked over a half conscious rogue towards Jungkook.

Jungkook caught it mid air and slammed it down onto the ground before ripping its head off. With that being the last rogue, Jungkook and pack were able to finally catch their breath as they examined the graveyard of torn limbs by their feet.

“Where the fuck are they coming from?” Hoseok panted.

Namjoons eyes wavered as he studied the carcasses on the ground. He had no answer for Hoseok. Rogue wolves attack here and there but never had he seen such great numbers. Their appearance usually coincided with the phases of the moon but recently, their attacks had been random and in hoards. He did notice that they foolishly always went for Jungkook first. As strong as Jungkook was, he was not invincible. Namjoon had also taken note of how haggard and tired his pack was from fighting almost everyday. If they didn't find an answer anytime soon, he feared that he would lose a pack member.

Everyone turned their head towards the trees when they heard a branch snap. In the distance, Jungkook caught a flash of white teeth and familiar pitch black eyes.

“I got it!” Jungkook shouted, before running after the rogue.

He was fucking exhausted. He really hoped that this was the last one because he was losing strength and fast. These recent attacks only fuelled his anger because if he had mated with someone of his species, he would’ve tripled in strength by now.

A yelp emitted from the rogue when Jungkook finally caught up and grabbed its legs. Jungkook swung the rogue against a tree, breaking its ribs in the process. As the creature whimpered against the ground, Jungkook winced when he saw that it was laughing.

“What’s so funny?” Jungkook sneered, angry that it was still breathing.

The creature seemed to be mumbling a familiar word over and over again but Jungkook couldn’t figure out what it was saying. Another yelp came out from the rogue as Jungkook kicked its face in. He crouched down and grabbed the creature by its scruff.

“Speak up!” He demanded.

Despite his impressive experience fighting rogues, Jungkook still had a hard time getting used to the disturbing ways these creatures moved and laughed even though they were near death. This rogue had its jaw kicked in and its tongue was hanging out due to the lack of the bottom half of its face. The grip Jungkook had on it tightened when it continued mumbling. Just as he was about to lose his patience trying to unscramble the creatures jargon, Jungkook finally put together what it was mumbling. The rogue seemed to notice the shift in Jungkook’s eyes and laughed even louder.

“I bet she’d taste so good too.” were its last words before Jungkook ripped out its heart.

Jungkook had to get back to Namjoon and let him know what happened.

It was mumbling your name this whole time.

The living room was quiet as the pack tended to their wounds. Jin went around ensuring that everyone was treating their injuries correctly even if it was just a little scratch.

"You need to clean it." Jin sighed, looking at the deep cut on Jungkook's forearm. The cut was his own fault. As Jungkook was ripping the rogues heart out, his arm got caught in the creatures ribs and it carved his arm as he was pulling it out of its chest.

"Just leave it, Jin." Jungkook grumbled, swatting Jin's worried hands away.

Namjoon and Jin exchanged glances, both annoyed and worried about the youngest member but Namjoon didn't have time to adhere to Jungkook's attitude. Thankfully, no one was seriously hurt but who knew when the rogues would come back to attack again.

"So," Yoongi said, sucking his teeth in the process, "anyone here knows what they want?"

Jungkook wanted to hear his members theories before jumping the gun because maybe the rogue was toying with Jungkook or maybe it wasn't even saying your name at all. The silence that followed confirmed Jungkook's fear. No matter what Jungkook did, he just couldn't seem to get away from you. All eyes were on Jungkook when he suddenly cursed.

"They're after her." Jungkook said, his fingers pinching his nose bridge.

"Who?" Jimin asked.

"His mate." Taehyung's grin only grew when Jungkook glared at him.

Amidst Jimin's surprise and the symphony of swear words thrown back and forth between the members, Namjoon felt his heart sink as a wave of deja vu hit him. The younger one failed to notice the sadness in the leaders eyes as he berated his pack mates who were teasing him with swear words.

"They're not after her," Namjoon finally spoke, breaking the fight, "Jungkook, they're after you and then her. They know that you'd go after them if they kill her before you mark her. They're after you first to get you out of the picture. As long as she's unmated, they're going to keep coming."

Namjoon felt a lump grow in his throat as realization washed over each member. All eyes slowly turned towards Jungkook who had his fists balled up. The pressure from his fists made his blood seep out from the cut on his forearm. Why did he have to deal with this? How come you were still intertwined with him despite being away for over a month? What did he have to fucking do to get rid of you for good?

"T-this could be different, Namjoon." Jungkook stammered, his mind moving too quick for his mouth to catch up.

"Jungkook listen to me," Namjoon said picking his words carefully as he approached Jungkook, "only you can stop this. We can't fend them off forever."

Jungkook grit his teeth and felt his breath labour. This wasn't fair. He didn't choose this and it seemed like life wasn't planning on giving him too many options either. Jungkook began to replay the conversation he had with Namjoon after he first discovered you. The blood from Jungkook's cut was now staining his pants as he remembered what Namjoon said about how strong humans were. What a fucking joke.

"I am stopping this! Who here in this room has killed more rogues than me? Huh? Who?!" Jungkook bursted.

Jungkook's brown eyes had now turned into a dark red shade.

"Killing them one will send ten. Killing ten will send a hundred. Killing a hundred will send a thousand. You have the responsibility to save her life," Namjoon argued tiredly, "look at your brothers. Look at you! We are not immortal, Jungkook."

Jungkook jumped up from his seat and grabbed his hair. His ears were now ringing. His responsibility?! He hadn't even marked you yet, why were you now his responsibility? He couldn't help but laugh aloud by how absurd everything and everyone was sounding. You had stolen what seemed like everything away from him-his freedom, his bodily functions and now even his morals. You kept taking from him and now you were his responsibility?

"Jungkook please," Jin pleaded, "can you please put your own ego aside and make a good choice for once in your life?"

Jungkook turned towards Jin and snarled, "Remind me who saved your fucking life just 20 minutes ago? If I hadn't ran to you in time, you would've been shredd-"

"Enough!" Namjoon yelled, "Whether you like it or not, her life is in your hand-"

"I will not be responsible for her death like you were for Irene!"

Within a second, Jungkook was slammed against the wall. His right cheek was throbbing and his nose bloodied. He wasn't sure if he had finished his sentence but the right hook from Namjoon answered that question for him. Before Jungkook could orient himself, Namjoon grabbed Jungkook by the neck and trapped him against the wall again.

"You will never utter her name in that context again do you understand?" Namjoon asked through gritted teeth.

Jungkook licked his lower lip, the taste of his own blood filling his mouth as he did.

"Do you understand?!" Namjoon bellowed, shaking Jungkook.

"Y-yes." Jungkook finally answered.

The older one finally let go but not without giving Jungkook one final shove.

"Have a better attitude tomorrow morning or you fend for yourself from now on." Namjoon threatened before disappearing into his study.

Jungkook kept his eyes on the floor as his members stood around staring at him. Jungkook could only count on one hand how many times he felt ashamed in life, he would now have to count on two hands after tonight. His members didn't say a word to him as they retreated back to their rooms one by one. Taehyung lingered for a little bit longer. He wanted to ring Jungkook out but decided to leave him to sulk all alone. Jungkook watched his blood drip from his nose onto his sweater. Would dying by some disgusting creatures be better than surrendering to fate? One thing was for sure, Jungkook would rather die with his brothers than alone. He turned his head towards the end of the hallway where Namjoon's study was. The searing pain from his broken nose was nothing compared to what he just said to Namjoon.

Namjoon had his head buried in his hands as Jungkook's words echoed in his mind. It had been years since Irene's death but it still pained him like it happened yesterday. He knew the younger one was speaking out of anger but if he only knew how much Namjoon did blame himself.

"You know, I couldn't even mourn her after she died. I think I finally did after three months." Namjoon spoke.

Jungkook figured it was probably the smell from all his blood that alerted Namjoon to his presence. He cautiously walked towards Namjoon and sat in front of him.

"Her death was the first out of the two times I ever regretted taking leadership of our pack." Namjoon continued, looking up to meet the younger ones sad gaze.

"And the second?" Jungkook asked, his voice barely audible.

"Tonight." Namjoon replied.

Jungkook let the uncomfortable silence engulf him. He stared at the picture of Irene resting on the bookshelf behind Namjoon and felt remorse like he had never before. Irene was Namjoon's mate. For years, Namjoon refused to mark her not because he didn't want to-because he did-but because he was afraid of bringing Irene in his world. He thought the best way to protect her was to keep her away. Jungkook had never seen someone love another person the way Namjoon loved Irene. He doted on her and gave her anything she ever wanted, everything except for one. Irene had begged and begged Namjoon to make her his official mate but he always rejected her advances. By the time Namjoon decided to turn a new leaf, it was too late. If Namjoon had marked her, he would've been stronger and maybe could've fought off the pack of rogues. That day, Jungkook and the pack were out hunting. When they came back, the cabin they had built had been ripped apart. The image of Namjoon carrying Irene's bloody body in his arms as he wept and called out her name was forever imprinted in Jungkook's brain. Namjoon's physical state was no better and if they hadn't returned when they did, they would've lost their leader too. Irene was one of the strongest people Jungkook knew. She was brave, unwavering and quick witted. Before Jin met Mina, it was Irene nursing everyone back to health after a fight and braving the forest to find medicine. Irene was strong and she was human.

"I'm really sorry. I didn't mean what I said and I shouldn't have said that," Jungkook apologized tearing his eyes away from Irene, "I will spend the rest of my life making it up to you."

Namjoon smiled. Although brash and somewhat arrogant, Jungkook always meant well at the end of the day. He couldn't even count how many brawls Jungkook got into because someone slightly badmouthed a member of the pack.

"Please, your life will probably end in the next few minutes with the amount of blood you're losing. Just let me punch the other side of your face and we can call it even." Namjoon joked.

Jungkook scoffed and wiped his nose. He really was losing a lot of blood.

"Jungkook, I couldn't save Irene but you have a chance here. Learning to love someone...don't you think that's better than losing someone," Namjoon wanted to laugh when he saw Jungkook flinch at the word 'love', "and if you can't do it for her, do it for me. For Irene."

Jungkook swallowed the lump in his throat, "I-I don't know if I can mark her right away, you have to give me some time."

Namjoon nodded understandingly.

"But I promise," Jungkook sucked in a breath, "I'll protect her with my life."

[rainverry]

pretty boy.

PAIRING  ☆  nakamoto yuta x afab!reader

GENRES  ☆  smut, fluff, angst, a bit of crack?, enemies to lovers, fake dating, college au

WARNINGS  ☆  18+ MINORS DO NOT INTERACT. profanity, substances (alcohol consumption, one mention of weed), light smut (oral [f receiving], praise kink), use of nicknames (baby, babe, princess, my girl, gorgeous), mentions of throwing up, one mention of blood, the characters are in their mid 20s in this fic, reader wears glasses and has a pet cat, yuta’s hair is red in this because that’s his best hair colour i don’t make the rules

SUMMARY  ☆  college life is full of uncertainties, but there is one thing you know for sure: nakamoto yuta hates your guts, and the feeling is mutual. so when he goes to you and asks you to pretend to be his girlfriend, you start to realise that maybe you were wrong about him too.

WORD COUNT  ☆  24.2k (im so sorry)

PLAYLIST  ☆  click!

AUTHOR'S NOTE  ☆  heya lovelies !! this is my first ever full-length one shot, as well as my first time ever sharing my smut with anyone so i’m kinda nervous lol if u think u’ve read any other of my full-length one shots before, no u haven’t <3 i also got carried away because i truly did not expect it to be this long 😭 big thanks to my friends lou for the feedback and carol for beta reading and encouraging me to continue writing when i kept having second thoughts 🥺 enjoy reading and feedback is always welcome !!

THE END OF YOUR MID-TERM BREAK always meant going to the nearest coffee shop with your two best friends, with the intention of catching up on all the things that happened on your short-lived holiday. It also functioned as the last time for you to have some fun before you knuckle down and keep your focus on studying for the final exams, merely six weeks away from now.

“Anyway, that’s how we managed to pull off the biggest cookie heist in the Im household,” Nayeon finishes, leaning down to take a sip of her chai latte.

“Must be fun, having younger cousins,” Jennie sighs in envy. She cradles her chin in one hand, toying with the ends of her hair with the other. “Meanwhile, all my cousins have grown up to be obnoxious jerks!”

You raise your eyebrows. “But not Taeyong, right?”

Jennie crinkles her nose in disdain. “The cousins on my mom’s side like to pretend I don’t exist. It’s a low bar, but Taeyong is the only nice one,” she throws her hair over her shoulder. “Speaking of, he should be here soon. You don’t mind him interrupting our girls’ day out, would you?”

You don’t mind at all. Despite your friend’s pretend indifference towards him, Lee Taeyong was the resident sweetheart, known and liked by everyone on campus. The music production major is the captain of the dance club, frequently volunteers to tutor his peers and on top of that, always makes sure to bring treats and small toys for your cat whenever he drops by your place.

What you did mind, however, is if he happens to bring along a friend of his with him. Although Taeyong could integrate himself into virtually all of the social circles around campus, there is one group he sticks with more than the others – the group filled with fuckboys, notorious for flirting with anyone who was available and throwing wild parties. How the sweet Taeyong manages to get along with people so different from him is beyond you, but you figure men will always be men.

As if sensing your thoughts, Nayeon remarks, “I don’t think he’ll be with anyone today. I’m sure they’re too busy unpacking.”

You push your glasses up your nose and shrug, only hoping that was true. Even though not all the men in Taeyong’s friend group are bad apples, you’ve had more than enough awkward encounters with them to last you a lifetime. Plus, there is also one person in that group that you dislike more than the others, and you know Taeyong wouldn’t consider bringing that person within a ten feet radius of you.

The doorbell of the cafe rings, followed by two sets of footsteps and familiar laughter. You tense.

Today is not your lucky day.

You look up to see Taeyong heading towards your table. And behind him, wearing his signature smirk, is the bane of your existence – Nakamoto Yuta.

Many people have asked you why you hate Nakamoto Yuta, and your answer has always been: where do you even begin? His annoyingly vibrant red hair, the fact that he coined the nickname “Glasses” for you because of your poor eyesight, the way he’s able to get along with everyone except you and the fact that he’s been your rival for the top spot of the class ever since you could remember were only a few reasons the mere sight of him can make your blood boil.

Before you can even process your thoughts, Nayeon hisses, “Behave.”

You resist the urge to let out a groan at her command, and when you meet Taeyong’s eyes he directs a sheepish smile at you. You glare at him and look down at your phone, deciding to scroll through whatever that would make you feel less irritated at that moment.

“Hey, guys,” Taeyong greets when he reaches your table. “Enjoyed your break?”

You mumble out, “Hi, Taeyong.”

Taeyong nods at you and Jennie, and begins to listen to Nayeon as she animatedly recounts the story of how she and her younger cousins managed to steal the five batches of chocolate chip cookies her aunts had baked. You also want to listen to her story even though you had just heard about it three minutes ago, but someone slides into the seat across from yours. Despite yourself, the action captures your attention.

“Just going to ignore me, Glasses?” Yuta grins at you, completely disregarding your friends and the fact that this was supposed to be your private time with them. “Or have you already forgotten about me after such a long time?”

“Yeah, I was too busy having fun to think about things that don’t matter,” you snap back. “Anyway, two weeks was long for you? Did your friends not want to hang out with you or something?”

“Here we go,” Jennie mumbles under her breath. You pretend not to notice.

Yuta slaps a hand over his heart. “Ouch, right in the feels,” he pouts. “My break was fine, thank you. Kinda missed seeing your annoying butt around, though.”

“I’m flattered, but the feeling is not mutual,” you retort, and before you can say more, Jennie clears her throat.

“Anyway, that’s the end of the story!” Jennie says abruptly, even though you’re sure from Nayeon’s expression that she had more to tell. Subtle. From Yuta’s face, you can tell he thinks the same thing. 

The both of you normally try to avoid seeing each other as much as possible, knowing it would only lead to endless arguments, but right now you’re blaming Taeyong for even daring to bring Yuta into your presence when he knew you were going to be here.

Jennie claps her hands and looks up at her cousin. “Yongie, you wanted to give me something, right?” 

“Oh yes,” he holds up the bag that he’s carrying and sets it on the table, a look of amusement on his face. “A little present from my mom – to remind you that you should have come to visit her during the break, and she’s mad that you didn’t.”

“Oh, it’s because–” Jennie starts, but Taeyong is quick to cut her off.

“Oh, and I’m mad too.”

The two start bickering in their mother tongue, and you and Nayeon share a smile at their antics. Yuta is still sitting across from you, but you’re trying your best to ignore the fact that, for whatever reason, he’s looking at you. You look down at your phone again, desperately wanting for the guys to be gone already so you can finally get back to your precious dishing time with your best friends.

“Take a picture, Nakamoto. It’ll last longer,” you comment sarcastically, unable to handle Yuta’s gaze on you any longer.

He seems undeterred by your sudden jab at him. “It’s cute that you’re trying so hard to ignore me, Glasses,” he sighs. “I’d like to see you ignore me when I beat you for valedictorian next year.”

“Okay, enough,” Taeyong cuts in, sparing his friend a warning glance when he sees the look on your face. “Jennie, you’re going to visit me and my parents during the next break and that’s a promise, okay?”

“For ahjumma and ahjussi, maybe, not you,” Jennie teases, then her face softens. “But thank you for the food.”

Taeyong nods, then pats Yuta on the shoulder. “Anyway, we should get going or we’re going to be late.”

Yuta hums in agreement and is about to get up when Nayeon clicks her tongue. “Wait, pretty boy, you still owe me ten bucks.”

Pretty boy is the nickname Nayeon coined for Yuta in high school – a moniker that you would agree suits him to some degree.

(Not that you would ever admit it in a million years.) 

Yuta groans, head falling back in annoyance. “I haven’t forgotten. Hold up, I think I have some cash on me.” He reaches into his jacket pocket when a handful of paper scraps fall out and scatter all over his lap. With a mutter of annoyance, he reaches down to pick them up, and you’re expecting him to put them back inside his pocket when he suddenly crumples them up in his hands. 

You raise your eyebrow in surprise. “Hoarding trash in your pocket, huh? Is finding a trash can too difficult for you?”

Yuta glares for a split second before the maddening smirk is back on his face. “Thanks for your concern, Glasses. It’s actually all the phone numbers I got working at the bar last night. Not that I need them, I already have enough women wanting me.” 

You roll your eyes as the others laugh and let out dog whistles at his incredibly distasteful comment. Only Yuta could make your friends think such a repulsive statement is hilarious.

“No shortage of girls chasing you everywhere, huh, pretty boy?” Nayeon asks playfully.

“None, unfortunately,” Yuta shakes his head, producing a ten dollar note from his wallet and handing it to Nayeon. Seeing Taeyong already heading for the door, he shoots them a smile. “Bye, girls.”

He turns and winks at you. “See you around, Glasses.”

You’re left glowering at Yuta’s backside, your scowl only fading when you hear the sound of the door closing behind them.

“God, I can’t stand him,” you murmur.

Jennie lets out a practised sigh. “Yeah, we know.”

During your first year of college, you accidentally found a secret corner in the campus library while searching for a textbook for your major. The corner was cosy and out of sight from the rest of the library, perfect for when you need some peace and quiet. Ever since, it’s been your place of solace.

It’s usually the place you go to to be completely alone, and this time you needed a few hours of reading by yourself. It’s been a week since your mid-term break ended, and after nights staying up studying, you suppose right now is a good time to have a short rest from cramming information into your brain, and just enjoy a romcom book instead.

You are one hour deep in your romance novel when you hear footsteps in the library getting louder. You figure it’s Nayeon, the only other person who you’ve told about the secret corner, coming to find you as she’s chided you many times on how you tend to lose track of time when you’re in here.

The footsteps end in front of you, but you don’t look up from your book. “I’m at a good part, Nayeon, give me a few minutes.”

“Are the characters making out or something?”

The unexpected voice makes you snap your book shut and when you push your glasses up your nose to see clearly, you could only stare up in shock. Nakamoto Yuta stands in front of you, an unusually shy smile on his face. At first you’re speechless – he is the last person you would want to see anywhere, let alone in what was supposed to be your safe haven from the rest of the world.

“What are you doing here?!” you hiss, and then you look back down at the novel in your hands. “Great, you made me lose my page, you idiot!”

Suddenly, Yuta’s voice is devoid of his usual humour. “Can we talk?”

“Can you go be annoying somewhere else?” you flip through the pages rapidly, barely noticing his serious tone. You smile in relief only when you find the page you’re looking for, and you prepare to resume reading. 

Yuta lets out an exasperated sigh at your attempt of scaring him off and kneels down to your level, and to your surprise, he takes your book, secures the page you're on with your bookmark and then puts it aside.

“Seriously, I need your help,” Yuta murmurs, his big brown eyes staring deeply into yours. His face is so close to you, his voice so gentle that for a moment, you’re unable to stop and think about the sheer absurdity of his words. 

“I–” you start, before shaking your head and letting out a snort. “You need my help? Couldn’t you have asked, I don’t know… anyone else?”

“You’re my last resort,” Yuta responds immediately, as if he’s already rehearsed what he’s going to say. You think he’s about to drop the serious act and start teasing you again, but his lips are still tucked into a thin line. “And believe me, you’re the only one who can help me.”

“I seriously doubt that,” you scoff, getting ready to leave. Your secret corner isn’t even safe anymore. The only place you can go back to would be your dorm room, a place you know would be empty of any fuckboys or sworn enemies who would only ruin your mood. You know your roommate Jisoo would probably have someone over for the night, but it’s a small price to pay to avoid seeing Yuta again.

Yuta watches silently as you gather your things. You think he’s given up on whatever he was going to ask you and let you leave when he speaks up again.

“I need you to fake date me.”

You stop in your tracks. 

“What?” you stutter out. “You’re kidding, right?”

You know he’s not kidding, not when he’s staring at you so intently – not when you had heard his voice as clear as day, and with no trace of irony in his words.

“Y/-”

You burst out laughing. You laugh and laugh until your sides hurt, all the while Yuta is still kneeling in front of you, and you’re clutching your stomach at the ridiculousness of it all. 

“You want me to fake date you? Seriously? That’s what you need my help for?” you manage to finally say after your laughter dies down, wiping tears of mirth off your cheeks. “Oh, Nakamoto. That’s funny. Like that’s ever going to happen. I mean, what would I even get out of it?”

You can see Yuta’s cheeks are lightly shaded pink after seeing your reaction to his statement, but he replies without a hitch, “You can show off your hot-ass boyfriend to everyone else.”

“Yuta!” you smack him with your novel, and he grunts at the impact. “I’m serious. How would that benefit you? More importantly, how the hell would that benefit me?”

“I don’t know!” Yuta grumbled, softly rubbing the spot on his arm where you had smacked him. He finally gets up from his kneeling position and starts pacing around. “Listen, so many girls have been–”

“Oh my God, I know, there’s no shortage of girls that want you–”

“Let me finish!” Yuta snaps, his hands balled in fists when he glares at you. His face and voice softens after a beat, and he takes a deep breath before continuing. “Girls have been messaging me left and right asking me to go out with them. And–” he runs a hand over his face. “–I’m tired of it, okay? I’m not interested. And they’re not getting the message. I thought that maybe, if I get someone to act as my girlfriend, they will back off for a bit.”

You scoff. “Then get an actual girlfriend, you dick! Why get a fake one?”

“Because like I said, I’m not interested,” Yuta repeats slowly. “I’m not looking for an actual relationship right now. And, like… I came to you because I know for a fact that you won’t want an actual relationship from me. I don’t know…” he sighs again, staying silent for a moment. “Just… think about it, okay?”

You stare at him silently, still in disbelief at the words he had just said. You’re almost convinced that you had fallen asleep while reading your book a while ago and this is just some strange hyperrealistic dream. Yuta honestly, genuinely believed that there was a chance that you would help him and go along with his crazy request. You don’t know how you feel about that. 

What you do know, though, is that you don’t want to be tangled up in Nakamoto Yuta’s business in any way.

After a long pause, you shake your head.

“I’ll give you my answer now, Yuta. Thanks, but no thanks.”

You sling your bag over your shoulder and stand up from your seat, romance novel in hand. You can’t resist the temptation of looking over your shoulder and commenting one last time.

“Rejection doesn’t feel so good now, does it?”

You relish at the sight of his red cheeks before leaving the library.

You had been studying in your room when Nayeon and Jisoo had burst through the door, begging for you to try on a few outfits they had put together. You agreed, thinking it was only going to be a brief try-on and then you’d shove the outfits back in your closet, but somehow they’d convince you to keep the clothes on and crash a nearby party with them. To top it all off, they had also asked you to ditch your glasses so you could finally use the coloured contacts that you very much disliked wearing.

That’s how you find yourself in the corner of some random stranger’s house, nursing a red solo cup in one hand. The dress your friends had put on you showed off your legs a lot more than you would have liked, so now you’re trying your best to keep yourself warm with the crappy booze they were serving.

As you survey the small crowd surrounding you, you’re hit with the realisation that you don’t really know anyone here. You know the point of your friends dragging you to this party was for you to mingle a little more with other people, but somehow you’re unable to think of any interesting opening lines to a conversation that could last longer than two minutes. You’d rather have a friend beside you, but Nayeon is chatting it up with someone from her major and you don’t want to interrupt them. Just a while ago you also caught a glimpse of Jisoo heading upstairs with a stranger you hadn’t seen before, and you definitely don’t want to disturb her fun time. 

You hadn’t even bothered telling your friends about Nakamoto Yuta’s offer he had given a few hours ago. That man was not worth wasting your breath for.

And yet, your thoughts kept drifting back to him.

Yuta actually had the balls to ask you, his sworn enemy, for help in becoming his fake girlfriend. Out of all the things! You still remember the stony expression he had on when the words I need you to fake date me had left his mouth, signifying that yes, he was being one hundred percent serious. You know he’s known for his unpredictable and somewhat wild streak, but to ask you to do such a bizarre thing…

You don't know what to think.

“Hey, cutie. Can I get you a drink?”

Your head snaps up to see a tall stranger smirking at you, his eyes red from him smoking what you can only assume is some offhand weed that you know are usually at these types of parties.

“I already have one, thanks,” you smile politely, raising your cup to show him. Now, you desperately wish there’s a friend by your side – you’re not in the mood to be hit on at the moment.

But the stranger doesn’t get the hint. He steps close enough to you that you can instantly smell the repulsive mixture of substances in his breath. “That shitty beer they’re serving? Don’t be stupid. I’ll get you a real drink,” he leans in, dropping his voice so he could whisper in your ear, “Unless there’s something else you want me to do for you?”

Your stomach churns at the implication of his words.

“Um, no, thank you, I… have a boyfriend,” is all you manage to say before slipping away from his presence.

You sprint outside of the house, trashing your cup in the process, relieved to be free from the smell of booze and flirty men who wouldn’t take no for an answer. You pull out your phone from your purse.

you: gonna bail, will u and jisoo be okay?

nayeon: yeah i didn’t drink anything so ill be driving us back

nayeon: u okay tho? 

you: just need to do sumn real quick. dont worry ill find my way home

As soon as you know your friends will be fine, you immediately call for an Uber. You have one destination in mind.

You're surprised how quick the ride to Yuta’s place is. Amazingly, you know what you’re going to say to him now. Maybe it’s the alcohol running through your veins that’s making you do such an illogical thing, really.

When you knock on the door, Johnny is the one who opens it. “Oh, hey.”

When you see his look of surprise, you’re now realising how crazy you must look. Johnny must have not recognised you at first, especially now that your usual glasses are gone and your eyes are a shade of grey. You do suppose you can’t be the first person to show up at the guys’ dorm at midnight in a little dress and heels, but the thought of you being compared to those other girls doesn’t really comfort you.

You make a feeble attempt at covering yourself up, giving him a bashful smile. “Um, hey Johnny. Is Yuta home?”

Johnny’s eyes widen even further, causing your embarrassment to grow tenfold. You can only imagine what Johnny could be thinking right now.

“Uh, yeah, I don’t think he’s asleep yet. Want me to get him?”

When you nod and Johnny’s gone, you rub your hands that you didn’t realise were sweaty against the back of your dress. You can already think of all the things he would say when he sees you. Hearing a nauseating Aww, did you get dressed up all for me, Glasses? from Yuta may as well happen. The insanity of what you’re about to do finally hits you, but there’s no turning back now.

“Y/N?” Yuta says, standing in front of you in nothing but a pair of sweats, with his red hair looking exceptionally vibrant in the night. He’s clearly too shocked to come up with his usual cocky opener, and for that you are grateful. “What are you doing here?”

You can’t see where Johnny went and you know he’s not the type of person to listen in to his friends’ private conversations, but you’re not willing to take the risk. “We need to talk,” you assert, brushing past Yuta and heading straight towards his bedroom. His jaw drops, and you’re equally surprised at how different you’re behaving. The alcohol really is making you act more brazen than usual.

“Well, come in, make yourself at home, why don’t you?” Yuta grumbles, his bewildered expression now changing into one of annoyance as he closes the bedroom door behind him. “What do you want? You here to reject me again?”

You lean against the wall and take in your surroundings, in awe of how immaculately his bedroom is decorated, with accents of space blue and striking reds all over. You spot an electric guitar in the corner. You didn’t know he played any instruments.

“I’ll do it.”

“What?”

“I’ll be your fake girlfriend, Yuta,” you tell him, and you see his eyebrows raise in amazement. “But I want you to know that I’m also doing it for my own gain.”

Yuta immediately scoffs, but there’s a hint of amusement on his face. “Okay. What’s in it for you?”

“To get my friends to stop dragging me to parties I don’t want to go to. But also, if they do manage to get me to go to a party somehow and there are annoying dudes there trying to flirt with me, I can say I have a boyfriend and I wouldn’t be lying.”

“Sort of,” Yuta comments drily. He crosses his arms against his chest, and it’s difficult not to notice his perfectly sculpted biceps. There’s a chain tattoo wrapped around his left arm that you’ve never seen before. “Well, I didn’t expect this. I guess I should say thanks.”

You shrug, looking down at the floor. “It’s whatever. I love those girls, but they can’t get off my ass about joining them at parties, when sometimes all I want to do is study at home,” you admit reluctantly, before looking back up at him. “Anyway. How are we going to do this?”

Yuta shoots you a grin, and for once it’s not the usual one that would make you roll your eyes. “I’m so glad you asked. To do this, we have to fool everyone, and that includes our own friends. Because if our friends don’t believe us, Glasses, then no one will.”

You’re irked by his use of the nickname (like, you’re not even wearing glasses at that moment!), but you tilt your head in curiosity. “What are you getting at?”

“Before we just tell everyone that we’re dating, we have to hang out with each other. One on one.” 

Your mouth runs dry at what he just said –  but Yuta’s not done talking. “You and I both know that everyone knows that we can’t get along, Y/N. How the hell are we going to convince them we’re dating when you keep insulting me?”

“You always insult me too,” you retort, and he nods solemnly.

“Yes, I have, and that’s why we have to stop doing that as soon as possible. Tomorrow I have an early morning class, but I’ll be free after. We can figure out all the details then,” he looks at you, reaching in his pocket for his phone. “Give me your phone.”

Your hands feel sweaty again at the thought of Yuta being able to contact you any time he wants, and you hope he doesn’t notice how jittery you are as you hand him your phone.

As he types his number in and calls his phone from yours, you let out a dry laugh. “So it’s a date, huh?”

“I guess you could call it that,” Yuta gives your phone back to you but is unable to meet your eyes. Is he feeling embarrassed at the thought of going on a date with you? 

Your heart drops when you think about it. You think you’re sobering up now, because now you’re wondering if you've just made a huge mistake.

“Um… I should go,” you breathe, clutching your purse close to your chest.

“Wait,” he says, looking into your eyes again, and there’s a small smile on his face. 

Any second thoughts you have vanish instantly. 

Yuta extends his hand out, his grin growing wider. “We should shake on it.”

“Shake on it? You’re such a dweeb.”

He rolls his eyes. “Just do it.”

So you do.

You wake up with a light headache, but you’re surprised to find a painkiller and a glass of water on your nightstand, a small note sitting right beside it.

take this, I know you need it -N

You sigh in awe, thanking the heavens for you having such a godsend for a best friend. You don’t know what time it is, but the rest of the apartment is quiet, so you assume your roommates are at their mid-morning classes. After taking the pill, you check your phone for the time. As you suspected, it’s almost 11. You also have two unread texts that were sent to you half an hour ago.

Unknown: this is yuta. i’m free now

Unknown: unless ur still sleeping lol

You roll your eyes, swiftly typing a response.

you: dickhead

you: u would sleep in too if u had my bed

You don’t know how long it will take for him to reply, so you put some music on and take a shower. Your pet cat Pumpkin isn’t scratching at your door like he usually does, so you reckon one of your roommates had already fed him for the morning. 

As you’re getting ready, you recall the events of the night before with a shudder. It feels like a fever dream that you actually showed up at Yuta’s house in the middle of the night so you could tell him that you would pretend to be his girlfriend, but that crappy beer you had must have given you a boost in confidence.

You’re in the middle of having breakfast when you hear your phone buzz.

yuta: oh good morning sleeping beauty

yuta: come find me at the library ;)

Fifteen minutes later, you find Yuta sitting at a lone table right in the center of the library. He’s dressed in a grey hoodie and blue jeans, his red hair tied up into a mini ponytail.

“Took you long enough, Glasses,” Yuta remarks when he sees you, a smirk on his face.

You ignore his comment, pulling up the chair across from him and sitting down. The library is empty besides two people sitting at different corners, so you don’t bother keeping your voice hushed. “Let’s talk terms,” you start counting off your fingers. “First, no more calling me Glasses.”

Yuta pouts at that. “Aww, come on. Not even as a – what do you call it – term of endearment?”

“No,” you narrow your eyes at him. “Fake boyfriend or not, that’s a stupid thing to call your significant other. No more Glasses,” though he still looks put out by it, you take his silence as a sign to continue. “You can call me by other nicknames. The usual, like baby and stuff.”

“Okay, stuff,” he grins.

You glare at him.

“Fine, baby it is,” Yuta relents, crossing his arms over his chest. “Damn. You’re no fun in the morning, huh?”

You really aren’t. You once gave Jisoo the silent treatment for one whole week because she had the audacity to prank you by setting an early alarm on a day you were supposed to peacefully sleep in, but that’s not a story you are going to tell him. 

“Second, this relationship shouldn’t last longer than a month.”

“Don’t I get a say in that?” Yuta protests, raising an eyebrow at you. “What if girls start hitting on me the second we break up?”

“That’s your problem,” you smile smugly. “Remember, Nakamoto. I’m only doing this fake relationship for my own gain, and I only need it until the end of finals week.”

He stares at you for a moment with narrowed eyes, and you expect him to say something biting back to you, but suddenly the smirk is back on his face.

“Fine. My turn to list my own terms.”

“I’m not finished y-”

He clicks his tongue, interrupting you. “You talk too much, baby. Are you forgetting who came up with this whole fake relationship idea in the first place?” 

You could only glare as you keep your mouth shut, and nod at him as a way to tell him to begin.

“We need to go on fake dates. All the time,” he says so solemnly that you almost laugh. “To fake it for the gram, of course. And whenever we’re around our friends, we have to hold hands or something. Just so they don’t get suspicious.”

You blink. The thought of holding hands with Yuta in front of all your friends made your stomach do a flip.

Yuta grins at you, relaxed as ever. “Why don’t you take a story of me now? The sooner the better.”

It’s difficult to argue with his logic, so you pull out your phone and quickly snap a picture of him looking to the side, his tiny ponytail on display. As you prepare to post it on your story, you can already hear all the things your friends will say the second they view it, but you push that thought down. You’ll just have to worry about that later.

“Anything else?” you say as you put your phone back in your pocket. 

“You need to call me baby too,” he adds, and you groan out loud.

“Come on!” you cry out, looking at him in exasperation. “Isn’t that the guys’ thing to do?”

“Incorrect. And very sexist of you,” Yuta deadpans. “Call me baby, and I’ll stop calling you Glasses for the rest of time. Deal?”

It’s a very tempting offer, and even though you’re still inwardly cringing at how you’re supposed to call him baby, you sigh in surrender. “Fine, whatever. But I have one last condition.”

“Shoot.”

“After the time is up, if we go back to being enemies or not, you can never tell anyone that this relationship was fake. That will be too embarrassing for either of us.” 

Yuta smirks. “Whatever you need, baby,” he replies and you roll your eyes. That nickname will take a while to get used to. Before you can say anything, he looks at you and says, “By the way, we can’t tell anyone right away, or they’ll never believe it.”

You nod. “That’s fair.”

Although you would prefer to get this done with as soon as possible, you agree with Yuta. You know that Nayeon (and perhaps Jennie and Jisoo to a lesser extent) knows more than anyone just how deep your hatred for Yuta ran in your bones, so telling her that you’re suddenly dating him won’t fool her at all. You suppose that Instagram story that you posted of him was a good start to your deception.

“Okay,” you clap once, flashing him a saccharine smile. “Well, if there’s nothing else, I’m done talking. Go away,” you tell him, pulling out textbooks and a few notebooks from your bag, readying yourself for a long day of studying ahead. 

Yuta doesn't move, still looking at you with those big eyes of his. 

“Or…” he trails off, and you look up at him, waiting for him to finish. “...we could study together, and after you're done, we could get to know each other a little better. How does that sound?”

You rub your temples and sigh. “Just as long as you don't piss me off too much.”

He grins, signing an X over his heart. “I'll be the best study buddy, I promise.”

Yuta then pulls out his own textbooks and supplies and you gasp in surprise at the amount of pens in his large pencil case – two large bundles of them are tied together with rubber bands, plus a few loose ones that are scattered at the bottom.  

“Do you really need that many pens?” you ask.

He shrugs nonchalantly. “I tend to go through them a lot because I make a lot of notes in class. You can take some off my hands if you want to.”

You shake your head in disbelief and reach for a blue pen. “Well, now I know who to go to when I need another pen,” you joke, fiddling with the clicker and doodling with it at the corner of your notebook. You start writing out some notes with it. “Wow, this is a really good one. Never thought you’d be the one to write down your notes, Nakamoto. I just assumed you typed them all into your laptop or something.”

Yuta sends you a wink. “I’m traditional like that.”

“Are you sure I can take this?” you question, eyeing the pen in your hand. You can’t deny that you’re already fond of how easy and comfortable it is to use, but you’re hesitant about taking something from Yuta.

“Of course. I mean, I literally have 50 more.”

“Thanks,” you reply quietly, feeling a surge of gratitude. A week ago, if someone told you that Yuta will offer something to you and you’ll willingly accept it, you would have laughed straight in their face. You're aware that it’s just a pen, but the sweet gesture tugs at something in your heart.

Maybe Yuta doesn’t really hate you as much as you think he does.

You sneak a glance at him and a small crease has appeared between his eyebrows and his lips has formed into a pout as he’s carefully highlighting a passage in his textbook. It’s strangely cute, especially since he’s using a neon pink highlighter. He inclines his head down, and you see that the hair band holding up his ponytail is also a light shade of pink. 

Your heart skips a beat.

You clear your throat as if he suddenly caught you staring, even though you’re sure he’s still focused on taking notes. Fighting the sudden wave of awkwardness in your gut, you try to focus on your own books.

Your phone buzzes in your pocket, and you fish it out to see you’ve gotten a few notifications.

nayeonyny replied to your story: ur hanging out with the DEVIL himself????

jennierubyjane replied to your story: is this real lol

You resist the urge to immediately reply to your friends’ messages, and ignore it for now. As you look at Yuta, his head bent down as he studies his notes, it sinks in that this will be your life for the next few weeks.

What have you gotten yourself into?

The rest of your study session went by without a hitch, save for a couple of snarky remarks from Yuta. He had been a really good study buddy, much to your surprise. You really admire his commitment to taking down all of his notes – and now you understand why, seeing as how his handwriting is the neatest and the most beautiful of anyone you’ve ever seen. 

(But you did not voice your praises to him because he really doesn’t need another reason for his head to get any bigger.)

After an hour of studying, you made good on your promise to get to know each other better. Yuta had listened intently as you explained the reason why you chose your major, and in turn, he told you that he had a few dozen cousins in Japan that he has never met. It was only when the sun had dipped low outside the library windows that you decided that you'd learned enough about him and called your study session to a close.

The rest of the week consisted of the two of you playing the part on social media, with him posting several cryptic shots of you on his stories – which was met with much pestering from both your friend groups – and you informing your friends how you would be too occupied to join them partying or going out at night. While you didn’t exactly disclose what you were going to be doing during those times, you were leaving that up to their imaginations. 

In truth, though, you mostly went to the nearest cafe to study in peace. The other times were reserved for your fake dates with Yuta.

You’re not oblivious as to how Nayeon has been suspicious of your behaviour, but you’ve been able to dodge her questions for most of the time. You think you're positively dying from the weight of keeping a secret from your best friend, but as for now, your only confidant is Pumpkin.

You’re getting ready in your bedroom when you let out an apprehensive sigh.

“It’s happening today,” you tell your cat, staring into the vanity mirror. 

Pumpkin is lying on his back on the edge of your bed with his furry stomach exposed for you to see, and you're sure he’s asleep until he lets out a trilling sound at your comment.

Usually you’d coo at every little noise and action done by the cat and the sight of his white tummy would be too adorable for you to resist, but you’re too preoccupied by your thoughts to even notice.

Today is the day. 

Yuta will be arriving at your place at any moment, and you could practically hear the quiet beating of the clock in the living room ticking down the seconds until you hear the doorbell ring. 

Both Nayeon and Jisoo are still lazing around at home, because unlike you, they don’t have classes until later in the day. There’s a soft rumbling sound of the television that carries through the thin walls. Someone’s in the living room – right next to where the front door is.

You can taste the dread in your mouth as your brain comes up with all the possible scenarios of how your roommates would react when Yuta walks through that door. 

Once you’re done putting the finishing touches of your outfit, you gather your things and stop by your bed to stroke Pumpkin’s ears. “Well, wish me luck.” 

You’ve opened the door when Pumpkin gets down from the bed and stretches, suddenly deciding that he’s not in the mood for a nap anymore. He follows you into the kitchen and takes his usual spot on the kitchen island. You smile for a second at how cute he is, but your mind clouds again once you spot who’s in the living room.

Jisoo’s hogging the couch, which is in plain view from where you’re standing in the kitchen. The TV is playing a rerun of Stranger Things, but you don’t really think she’s paying any attention. Jisoo turns around when she hears the rattling of the fridge door when you open it.

“Oh, hey,” Jisoo greets, stifling a yawn. “Got a lot of classes today, huh?”

“Yeah,” you return timidly, taking a bottle of root beer from the side rack and unscrewing the cap with more force than necessary. You chug down the drink hastily, silently wishing it was a magic potion that could give you the confidence to go through with what you’ve planned for the day.

Jisoo doesn’t seem to notice the tremor in your voice. She runs a hand through her hair then studies her nails. “Sucks. Well, I have nothing to do for a while. Do you want me to drop you off?”

A nervous laugh escapes you. “Thanks, but I kind of already have a ride.”

The ringing of the doorbell makes you jump.

Jisoo gets up without a word, and before you can say anything, your roommate has opened the door to reveal a smirking Yuta, clad in all black.

There’s no mistaking the confusion in Jisoo’s voice. “What are you doing here?”

Yuta’s sporting a lazy smile, and doesn’t seem to notice how bewildered your friend looks. “I’m Y/N’s ride for today,” he says casually, as if it’s the most natural words to ever come out of his mouth.

You’re mortified when you witness how wide Jisoo’s eyes have become, and you’re convinced that they just might pop right out of her sockets if you don’t intervene. 

You set down your root beer on the kitchen island and walk towards the door. “I got it from here,” you say breezily despite feeling the opposite. You reach for Yuta’s hand, to which he immediately clasps yours in his, and then shoot your roommate the sweetest smile you could muster. “See you at lunch, Jisoo.”

Jisoo’s still agape when you close the door behind you, and you wait until you’ve gone down a floor before speaking up. “Couldn’t you have been a bit more subtle? You almost gave her a heart attack!” you hiss, glaring at Yuta.

But Yuta is unfazed by your outburst. “You’re the one who held my hand first,” he responds without hesitation.

You look down and realise that your hand is, in fact, still intertwined with his even though you’re now in the lobby and are walking out towards Yuta’s car. You quickly pull away, feeling your cheeks warm. 

“Whatever,” you retort. You're unable to find a proper comeback, too focused on the fact that you were holding onto his hand for way too long.

Embarrassing.

You let out a deep breath and cross your arms against your chest. “Anyway, just remember – I don’t want to flaunt whatever this is in everyone’s faces. That’ll just make us look desperate!”

Yuta opens the passenger seat door for you. “Can’t be a new thing for you,” he deadpans, leaving you speechless.

He stares at you before his expression breaks into a rueful smile. “Okay, I take that back. I said no more insults, right?” he affirms, playfully leaning against the door. “Come on, get in the car. Don’t want to be late, now, do we princess?”

It’s only because he reminds you that the both of you will be late that you’re willing to dismiss his incredibly half-assed apology. You slide into the passenger seat with a huff.

You wait until he gets in the car before you look at him pointedly. “I don’t want to hear another word from you until we reach campus.”

“No promises.”

Aside from the soft rock music blasting from the car speakers, the short ride to the campus is actually rather quiet, in contradiction to Yuta's attempt to tell you otherwise. You suppose he knows that you’re on your last straw – especially after the whole hand-holding incident – and the two of you have to be on good terms on the day you’re supposed to quietly debut your fake relationship to everyone.

You’re glad he knows that, because one more remark from him would have just infuriated you further.

Before leaving for his own lecture, Yuta drops you off in front of the lecture hall, a smirk on his face. “See you later, baby,” he whispers right next to your ear just for you to hear, and you try to ignore the goosebumps that form on your skin.

During the class, your thoughts keep veering to what Yuta told you when you went on a fake date just three nights ago.

“We do it on a random afternoon, when everyone’s eating in the cafeteria,” Yuta says conspiratorially, fiddling with his thumbs. You notice that’s a peculiar little habit he does whenever he’s excited. His half-eaten burger has been pushed aside, too caught up in telling you about his plan.

You stare at him blankly. “Do what?”

“We walk in together, holding hands,” he announces, grinning like a Cheshire cat. “What do you think? Not too over-the-top, but still enough to get people talking.”

It’s undeniably clever, and you don’t really have your own idea on how to go about it, so you reply: “Let’s do it.”

But looking back now, your stomach does flips when you think about what you're about to do very soon. Holding hands with Yuta in front of Jisoo in the safety of your own apartment is one thing, but walking into the cafeteria hand-in-hand with him where practically the entire college population could see it is another.

Uncharacteristically of you, you’re unable to focus much during your classes. You only have two before the inevitable lunch break, and before you know it, you’re at the place where the two you agreed to meet. 

As promised, Yuta is already there waiting for you, his bag slung over one shoulder. Instead of his usual smirk, he shoots you an easy smile that strangely eases the knot in your stomach.

“Are you ready?” he questions, hand outstretched for you. You take it.

“Now or never, I guess,” you say, trying to sound as nonchalant as possible. You’re sure he could see right through your demeanour, seeing as your hand is unusually sweaty. You’re awaiting a snide comment from him about it, but he doesn’t say a word.

When the two of you walk through the cafeteria doors, you can immediately feel eyes on you. You spot Nayeon, Jennie and Jisoo at your usual table, and if it was any other day, you’d head straight to them.

Today, you have a different plan.

Hand still clasped in his, Yuta leads you to where Johnny, Jaehyun and Taeyong are sitting. It’s Taeyong that notices you first, and you almost burst out laughing at how wide his eyes go when his gaze lands on your intertwined hands. The other two crane their necks to catch a glimpse at what he’s looking at – and when they see you, Johnny falls silent and Jaehyun’s jaw drops.

You send Yuta a sweet smile when he pulls out a chair for you to sit on. 

“Thanks,” you say appreciatively as you take your seat, secretly loving how your little audience is making zero attempts to hide their stares. Yuta takes the seat across from you, and you can tell he’s also trying his best not to laugh.

Johnny clears his throat, so quick to fix his composure. “Y/N, I didn’t know you’d be joining us today.”

“Yeah, Yuta invited me at the last minute. I hope you don’t mind?” you say in a light-hearted tone, studying their faces intently.

Taeyong and Johnny immediately shake their heads at your words. Jaehyun, though, is still staring at you for an impolite amount of time at this point, so Johnny not-so-subtly slaps him in the back. 

“Fuck!” Jaehyun coughs heartily, before choking out, “Um, no, we don’t mind at all!”

Before you can respond, Yuta murmurs, “Heads up, we’ve got company.”

You want to look up and see who Yuta’s talking about, but you can already tell who it is by the familiar sound of stilettos clicking, getting louder as she heads towards your direction. Only one person you know would bother wearing six-inch heels and outfits that were way too elegant for a Thursday afternoon lecture.

Jennie slams a hand down in front of you the moment she reaches the table, making everyone jump at the sudden intrusion.

“Hey, Y/N! What’s going on?” she asks you, her tone a tad more enthusiastic then what it probably should be. She has a grin on her face, though it screams confusion more than anything, and you almost giggle.

“Oh, nothing, I’m just gonna have lunch with Yuta today,” you reply with a cheeky smile.

“You and your friends are welcome to join us if you’d like,” Yuta adds smoothly, and before the words are completely out of his mouth, Jennie is already rushing back to tell the others. Two minutes later, Nayeon, Jennie and Jisoo have squished themselves into the seats beside you, even though there’s really not enough space for all eight of you on that table.

Ignoring the awkwardness in the air, Yuta reaches into his bag and lays out a few packed pastries onto the table. “I’ve got some for everyone,” he says. Then, he sends you a wink as he hands you a package. “And your favourite, baby.”

Gasps are heard around the table and your face heats up when the nickname falls from his lips.

Well, there’s the final nail in the coffin.

Jisoo turns to you with a puzzled look. “Okay – what? What’s going on? Why are you sitting at the guys’ table? And why is calling you baby?”

Yuta directly stares at Jisoo, a solemn look on his face. “I would think that that’s a normal thing to call your girlfriend.”

Ah, so much for not flaunting your fake relationship in everyone's faces.

“Girlfriend? What? You’re dating?!” Jennie shrieks, attracting attention from the surrounding tables. As if the sheer amount of people sat at this table wasn’t conspicuous enough. You resist the urge to bury your face in your hands.

“Is that why he dropped by this morning saying he’ll be your ride?” Jisoo asks you, her eyes still wide in amazement. 

“He dropped by this morning?” Nayeon’s eyes quickly turn to Jisoo, scandalised. “You didn’t tell me that!”

“Hey, listen, I was kind of too shocked to tell you–”

“Uhh, don’t you two hate each other?” Jaehyun asks, a bewildered look on his face.

“Maybe they finally realised they had to get rid of the sexual tension between them and just fucked it out,” Johnny mumbles in amusement.

Your head snaps up to look at Johnny. “What sexual tension?”

Seeing the look on your face, Yuta waves his hand dismissively. “Alright. alright, relax,” he says coolly, his signature smirk back on his face. You haven’t seen it on him for so long that you almost forgot how the sight of it used to infuriate you. He crosses his arms against his chest. “We did a study session together last week and have been hanging out ever since. No crime against that, is there?”

“And – let me get this straight,” Taeyong cuts in, putting up a hand to interrupt Yuta, before looking at you. “You didn’t attempt to strangle him even once?”

You shake your head and laugh. “Oh, believe me, I wanted to – at first,” you begin, surprising yourself at how truthful you're being. You glance at Yuta to see what he’s thinking, and he’s staring back at you. “But he’s actually not so bad once you get to know him.”

Yuta grins. “Thanks, babe. Right back at you.”

“This is crazy,” Nayeon deadpans, her gaze landing at the package in front of you. “I mean – two weeks ago you were saying you hated his guts. And now he’s getting you your favourite pastry? That’s crazy.”

In the commotion, you had forgotten that Yuta had given you something until Nayeon pointed it out. You look down at the package and raise your eyebrows in surprise when you realise it’s a chocolate croissant – your favourite ever since you could remember. 

Did you ever mention that to him? 

From what you can recall, the only information you told him was about your family, your education and your career goals, so you’re not sure how he could have known that. You decide to brush it aside for now, seeing as how Jennie is furtively nudging you at that moment. You turn to her with a questioning look. 

She leans in to whisper in your ear. “Ignore Nayeon. I’m really happy for you, babe. I mean, look at the way he’s looking at you.”

Yuta’s gaze is indeed on you, and there’s a mysterious smile on his face. Right away, you know the others would interpret it as a smile of adoration or something like that, but you know exactly why he’s smiling.

The plan is working.

“I don’t buy it.”

You look up from your textbook, seeing Nayeon leaning against your doorway. As if understanding her words, Pumpkin, curled up by the wheels of your chair, lets a meow of agreement.

You don’t even have to ask what she’s talking about.

“Why not?” you raise an eyebrow in fake confusion, masking the nervousness you feel inside.

Nayeon stares at you for a beat, before coming in and sitting at the edge of your bed. You spin around in your chair to face her. “Because you hate that man, Y/N. With every inch of you.”

“Things change, Nayeon,” you offer your already-rehearsed explanation, even though you could already feel your walls crumbling. It’s physically impossible to keep anything from her – your best friend knows you like the back of her hand.

And just like you expect, Nayeon gives you a knowing look.

You let out a sigh, getting up to close the door. If Nayeon is going to know about your deception, you’re not going to take the risk of Jisoo possibly overhearing you confirming it to her.

Once the door is securely shut and locked, you turn around and cross your arms with a huff. “Okay, fine,” you confess quietly. “It’s not real. But I have a good reason behind it.”

Nayeon’s face is a blend of amusement and curiosity. “And what’s that?”

You run a hand down your face. “To get all of you to stop pressuring me to go out all the time!” the second those words leave your lips, you let out a breath you didn’t know you had been holding. You didn’t realise how much this secret has been dragging you down all week. “Look, I love you, but you know how much my studies mean to me too.”

“Oh.”

The room falls silent.

“Okay, uh…” Nayeon starts but trails off quickly, suddenly staring at the floor in front of her. You tilt your head to look at her, and even though her face is angled away from you, the guilt on her face is crystal clear. “You, uh… we’re that annoying that you really had to get a fake boyfriend to get rid of us? I… I’m so sorry, babe.”

Your heart sinks. 

“Hey, don’t say that,” you sigh. You rush to sit next to her, and start patting her back assuringly. “It’s not just that. I mean, it’s also my fault for not learning how to say no. I know you mean well, really, wanting me to find someone for myself and all – but I don’t think I can really say no since Jisoo’s not as understanding as you, you get me?”

Amidst your speech, Nayeon lets out a muffled laugh.

“Also, when I went to that party with you two last week – even though all I really wanted was to just study at home – an icky guy tried to hit on me. I just thought that was the last straw.”

Your friend nods, the uncertainty on her face clearing a little. “Okay, I guess I get that. But, um, why pretty boy, of all people?”

“He approached me first. At my library corner. Said something about wanting all the girls to stop chasing him,” you explain in irritation, before smiling smugly. “Of course I said no first, but I changed my mind and agreed to do it because I’m a better person than him.”

Nayeon rolls her eyes at your words. “Very big of you,” she replies drily.

“Don’t get me wrong, I still hate his guts,” you tell her in defiance, then falling back into your sheets. “It won’t last long. Latest probably until finals are over.”

Nayeon doesn’t turn to face you, instead she’s staring at something on the floor of the bedroom. Perhaps she’s looking at Pumpkin – as the room goes quiet, you can hear him grooming his fur.

Your best friend finally speaks up again, but this time her voice is guarded. “I wonder why he came to you though.”

“The poor guy must have been desperate,” your attempt to snub, but the promise you made to Yuta about not insulting him anymore lingers at the back of your mind, and your tone falls flat. Of course he’s not here to hear it, but the guilt eats at you anyway.

“And yet you agreed,” Nayeon turns around to face you, a teasing smile on her face. “Maybe you’re the desperate one.”

“Hey!” you grab your pillow and smack her with it. “Not cool!”

Nayeon giggles at your reaction. “Well, it makes sense now. I guess I can see why you didn’t tell me about this.” 

You look directly into her eyes, shaking your head. “You’re the only one who knows. And you can’t tell anyone.”

Not even Jisoo, the words are at the tip of your tongue, but you know you don’t have to voice it to Nayeon. The both of you know that if Jisoo learns about your fake relationship, soon the entire school would know because she can’t keep her mouth shut to save her life.

“I won’t tell a soul,” Nayeon promises.

You’re currently scouring through your wardrobe, looking for a decent outfit you could put together. It’s Friday night – a time that you would usually reserve for staying in and curling up in your room with a novel, Pumpkin sleeping soundly by your side. 

Earlier when you were having lunch with your friends, though, Yuta had dropped by your table to ask you something.

“You wanna go out tonight?” he leans forward to whisper in your ear, but his voice is loud enough that everyone at the table has already heard it. Nayeon cocks up an eyebrow, while Jennie lets out a low whistle and Jisoo grins.

“Um, what?” you reply blankly, wiping the side of your mouth where a bit of your latte had dribbled out.

“A date, just the two of us. I figured since it’s a Friday…” Yuta shrugs, tilting his head in curiosity. “Unless you don’t want to?”

You’re well aware of the pairs of eyes on you, awaiting your answer, and you wish Yuta had told you he was going to do this beforehand so you could’ve prepared a proper response – because you don’t know how to react.

It takes you a few beats to realise that you’re taking too long, so you just nod. “Okay, sure. Where do you want to go?”

“Ah-ah, that’s going to be a surprise,” he winks, before readying to leave. “I’ll pick you up tonight, babe.”

You swear you could’ve strangled him for pulling that stunt without any prior warning, and now you’re cursing him for keeping the location of the date a secret – because what the hell are you supposed to wear?

The door of your bedroom opens and Jennie walks in, heading towards your wardrobe at once.

You let out a cry of relief. “Oh, thank God you’re finally here!” you sigh, collapsing onto your bed. You’re sitting on top of a few pieces of clothing you had thrown on your bedsheets while searching your wardrobe, tossed aside because none of them really felt right. “I have nothing to wear.”

“Nonsense! I know exactly what you should wear,” Jennie assures you as she sifts through your clothes.

You’re not sure what she’s referring to, but since she’s the fashion design major, you suppose you should trust her judgement. When Jennie pulls out your favourite sleeveless dress, you look at her skeptically. 

“It’s going to be cold outside,” you attempt to oppose.

“Then wear it with this jacket,” Jennie responds, holding up a black leather jacket that you only wear on special occasions. The outfit matches perfectly, you admit, but it’s also much nicer than what you thought it would be.

On your previous meetups with Yuta, you just threw on whatever was most comfortable for you at that moment and called it a day – but that was also when you weren’t trying to convince anyone that you were actually dating him. 

Seeing the look on your face, Jennie shakes her head. “Come on, you’re going on a date! You should look your best!”

You can’t really argue with her without making her suspicious, so you agree. Jennie leaves the room so you can finish getting ready. Yuta had texted you earlier saying that he’ll arrive at your dorm around 7, so you still have about ten minutes.

You’re looking in the mirror and fixing your hair when you hear the doorbell ring. When you leave the bedroom and enter the living area, Yuta’s hovering by the doorway, chatting quietly with Jennie. You spot Pumpkin curled up on your sofa.

“Well, don’t you two look like two peas in a pod?” Jennie coos, a grin on her face. Yuta’s also wearing a leather jacket similar to yours, and now you’re wondering if she had chosen this outfit for you on purpose. 

“Hey,” Yuta greets you with a smile, his hand extended out for you. “Shall we go?”

You nod, taking his hand. An inexplicable warmth spreads through your body when he intertwines his fingers with yours. You turn to your friend. “Um, I’ll see you later, Jen.”

“Have fun, you two!” Jennie shouts as the door closes behind you.

The second you know there’s no longer an audience, you pull your hand away from his. The hallway is slightly chilly, so you pull your jacket close to your body.

“Are you really not going to tell me where we’re going?”

“Nope.”

You huff. “Fine, but the least you could do is pass me the aux.”

In your peripheral vision, you see Yuta sporting a wide grin. “Whatever makes you happy, babe.”

You can’t really tell if he’s mocking you with the use of the nickname, but when you reach his car, he indeed lets you take control of the music. You put on a chill playlist and lean back against the seat with a sigh.

“You should’ve told me that you were going to ask me out today. I almost blew our cover in front of our friends!”

You can tell he wants to look at you, but Yuta is never one to take his eyes off the road when he’s driving. Instead, he replies evenly, “Dates are a part of our deal, are they not?”

“Yes, but like I said, you should’ve at least warned me first,” you retaliate.

Yuta shrugs, his hands still on the steering wheel. “Just wanted to surprise you like a normal boyfriend does.”

“Fake boyfriend, that is – or have you already forgotten that?” you reply sarcastically. You glance at him, continuing, “And another thing – you should really cool it with all the nicknames! Like, what’s the point of calling me babe when there’s no one around?”

You hear him scoff. “And what about you?”

“What about me?”

“You’re the one who should start calling me babe or baby! I’ve never heard you call me that even once,” he grates, his tone brusque even though his gaze is still fixed on the road ahead. “I told you, it’s either that or I will call you Gl-”

“Okay, okay!” you grumble, already flinching before the first syllable of his former nickname for you had even left his mouth. Your glasses are on your face tonight, only serving as a sick reminder of what he used to call you. “I’ll call you baby or whatever. Just don’t ever call me that stupid word ever again, please.”

Yuta snickers and you groan inwardly, resenting how easily you had let him have that victory. It’s silent for a moment before you turn to face him again.

“Can you tell me where we’re going now?”

“No.”

“Oh, come on!”

Despite your constant prodding, Yuta held his ground and had kept his lips sealed for the entire car ride. You admire his determination to keep your destination a secret – because the second he pulls up into the parking lot of the newest arcade center in the city, it all becomes worth it.

“No way,” you mutter in awe, unable to hide your grin as you survey the impressive size of the building. The word FUNSCAPE is emblazoned across the front, flashing in bright neon colours. You pull out your phone to take a photo of it.

Yuta maneuvers the car into a parking spot close to the entrance and once the engine is off, he turns to you and wiggles his eyebrows. “Hope you like it.”

You’re already scrambling to get out of the car. “Are you kidding? I love it!” you squeal in excitement, slamming his car door shut behind you. “I’m going to beat the shit out of you at every game.”

He grunts. “We’ll see about that.”

Walking through the front doors together, Yuta heads to the front counter to exchange money for some tokens, while you stride across to a row of air hockey tables. Immediately you’re reminded of the times you played it with your best friends in the arcade at the local mall back in your hometown. That arcade was much smaller and nowhere near as grand as this one, but the familiarity of the sport and the memory still warms your heart.

When Yuta approaches you, a handful of tokens in his grasp, you shoot him a deceptively sweet smile. “You’re going down, buddy.”

“Oh, you’re on.”

Choosing the nearest table, Yuta sets his phone next to the scoreboard and opens the camera. He changes it into a selfie video mode, and you can just barely see the two of you at each end of the frame. You look at him curiously. “What’s that for?”

“Officially, for the gram,” he tells you seriously, before his face breaks into a cocky smirk. “Unofficially, visual evidence of how easily I can beat you.”

It’s laughable how he really believes he has a chance at winning over you, a former air hockey champion amongst your friends. You don't want him to know how confident you are in your skills, so you mirror his smirk. “Keep dreaming, Nakamoto.”

Yuta inserts two tokens into the slot and presses the record button on his phone, and the game begins. You grip the disc in your hand, swinging a puck at an angle, which then bounces off the wall and goes straight into Yuta’s goal.

Yuta’s nostrils flare at your immediate success, and you snicker. The tricks to winning are already coming back to you, even though you haven’t played in a while. As the game continues, Yuta is able to sneak one or two pucks into your goal, but his points still pale in comparison to yours. Before long, the scoreboard has declared you the winner. Yuta groans in defeat and you laugh.

You bring the disc to your mouth and blow on it, as if blowing smoke off the barrel of a gun. “Still got it,” you smile smugly.

Yuta rolls his eyes. “Please, you got lucky. I’ll beat you in the next round.”

He inserts another two tokens and the game starts again. Now, he’s able to block some of your shots towards his goal, but your blocking technique for your own goal remains unbeatable. Two minutes later, the scoreboard shows that you’ve trumped him again, and Yuta is left glaring at the numbers on the screen.

“Still feeling good about that visual evidence, Nakamoto?” you let out a small giggle. 

Yuta shakes his head loftily and snatches up his phone, ending the video recording. “You win this time, babe. But I know for a fact that I’ll beat your ass at any other game here.”

Taking his words as a challenge, the two of you head towards the basketball machine to insert a few tokens. Even though you’re quite sure that he’s not into any sports, Yuta is surprisingly good at aiming for the net – and you aren’t even mad when he eventually wins. 

“Can we call it even now?”

Yuta grins, nudging you with his elbow. “Are you too scared to play anything else now just because I beat you at this?”

“Don’t flatter yourself. I can beat you at billiards with my eyes closed,” you shake your head indignantly. “You up for that?”

“You bet your ass.”

Walking towards the billiards table, you two agree for a best two out of three game. Yuta wins the first round, much to your chagrin.

“What were you saying about beating me with your eyes closed?” Yuta asks you as he places the cue stick behind his neck and rests his hands on each end. There’s a smirk on his face, but his head is tilted at an angle that you find somewhat endearing. 

Immediately, you feel the urge to take a picture of him in that specific pose, so you pull out your phone and aim your camera at him. Yuta barely has any time to react but he’s able to put on a surprised little smile before you take the photo.

As you pocket your phone, you reply snarkily, “Don’t celebrate anything just yet. It’ll just be embarrassing for you when I win.”

True to your word, you manage to pull through and win the other two rounds. As soon as the final ball falls into the hole, you slam the cue stick against your hand and grin triumphantly. “And that, Nakamoto, is how you do it.”

Yuta lets out a groan. “Fine, you win. But I must say, you’ve got one hell of a game in you,” he says while rolling his eyes, but you can see hints of a smile on his face. “Respect.”

You were expecting him to accept his defeat with much less grace, so your grin only widens at his comment. You look at your surroundings, dozens of machines and plenty other games occupying the massive space. “Well, what do you want to play next?” 

Yuta glances down at his watch, and then sets his cue stick down on the table. “Actually, I was thinking we could grab a bite. There’s a hot dog place just near here – sound good?”

“Sounds perfect.”

Five minutes later, you and Yuta are walking side by side to the hot dog restaurant. Yuta had insisted on driving, but you didn’t see the point of it when all you needed to do to get to your destination was just to walk to the other side of the parking lot.

The air is quiet as you stroll past the abundance of cars. It’s also slightly cold just as you predicted earlier, which wouldn’t be a problem since you’re wearing your jacket, but your bare legs definitely feel the chill.

You sneak a glance at Yuta, whose hands are buried deep in the pockets of his jacket. The wind has swept his fringe away from his face, leaving a red tuft comically sticking up in the opposite direction from the rest of his hair. You giggle.

“What?” Yuta asks, his head turning to you.

You look away quickly. “Um, nothing. It’s just – I can’t believe you wanted to take the car when the restaurant is literally two minutes away.”

“It would’ve been less than a minute if we drove,” Yuta grumbles quietly, then looks back at you with a smirk on his face. “Besides, the car’s heater would have saved you from shivering like you’re doing right now.”

You glare at him, quietly wondering how he could have possibly known that when he hasn't spared you a glance since leaving the arcade. “I would’ve worn something more appropriate if you had just told me where we were going!”

Yuta chuckles, removing a hand from his pocket and reaching for yours. “Fine, that’s my bad,” he apologises, squeezing your hand. “Feel better now, baby?”

The nickname and the warmth of his touch immediately makes you feel less cold, but you’re not going to tell him that. “Whatever,” you mumble quietly.

Thankfully, you reach the restaurant half a minute later, and it’s significantly less chilly. Yuta leads you to a seat next to the window, and as he momentarily leaves to order your meals, you decide to scroll through Instagram.

The story you’ve posted of Yuta has gotten a few likes, with Jisoo replying with “👀”. Nayeon still hasn’t viewed it, but you can’t help but wonder what she would say once she does. 

The two of you haven’t had a moment alone together ever since you told her the truth yesterday – and so, you had no one to privately complain to after Yuta had dropped the bombshell during lunchtime. While your other two friends had gushed over how smoothly Yuta had asked you out, Nayeon only gave you a quiet gaze that you couldn’t quite decipher.

Yuta returns a minute later, setting down a large tray in front of you. “Eat up, princess,” he says even though you’re already reaching inside the paper bag. The smell of fried goods immediately hits your senses and your stomach growls.

“You got my order right,” you remark as you survey the hot dog in front of you. “I thought you’d order it wrong on purpose just to piss me off or something.”

“And why would I do that?”

“Because that’s just the thing you’d do,” you roll your eyes as if it’s the most obvious statement in the world.

Yuta chuckles. “Nonsense. You know what they say – happy fake girlfriend, happy life.”

“I think the phrase you’re talking about is actually happy wife, happy life.”

He shrugs, beginning to munch on his fries. “Well, potato, tomato.”

You don’t have a response to that, so you start digging into your hot dog. For a while, the only sounds that can be heard are the quiet chewing from the both of you as you enjoy the food, and the rustling of the paper bag as Yuta reaches for a handful of fries every now and then.  

You sigh happily as you lean back in your chair, content with finally having some food in your belly. The games at the arcade had taken up a lot more of your energy than you thought.

You shoot a curious look at Yuta, who's finishing up the last of his fries.

“So…” you begin. “Are you getting fewer numbers from girls compared to before?”

“Not really,” he mutters almost incoherently, tossing the empty fries carton aside. He picks up the tissues laid on the tray to rub the grease off his fingers. “My DMs are still full with people who just can’t take the hint.”

“Maybe they’re not buying it,” you hum thoughtfully. “I mean, we did hate each other's guts like a week ago.”

Yuta tilts his head, a grin spreading across his face that’s so blinding that you’re caught off guard by the sight. “Does that mean you don’t hate me anymore?”

You hesitate, before narrowing your eyes at him. “Don’t get it twisted, Nakamoto. You’re still pretty damn annoying, but… I guess you’re more tolerable now.”

Yuta’s grin grows even wider, even though you aren’t sure that was even possible. “I’ll take it,” he falls silent again, fiddling with the tissue in front of him before he clears his throat. “I might have an idea of how to sell our relationship even more.”

“How?”

“We should take a selfie together and post it on Instagram. On our actual feed – not just the stories. And not just a normal selfie either, we should be posing like one of those nauseating Instagram couples.”

Oh hell no.

“Absolutely not!” you say, looking at him incredulously. “I don’t want your face anywhere near my feed.”

“Then we’ll just post it on mine,” Yuta challenges immediately, but you aren’t too keen on that either.

“Yuta–” you begin, but he cuts you off.

“Listen – just one pic. The most lovey-dovey, cringiest couple photo to end all lovey-dovey cringey couple photos. Once finals are over and we break up, I’ll delete it and it’ll be like it never happened!” Yuta tries to persuade you, his expression pleading. You give him a questioning look, though you’re silently weighing the pros and cons of what he’s proposing in your head. He sends you a sweet smile. “It’s for your own benefit too, you know?”

You suppose that’s true.

“Fine. We can do that,” you sigh in defeat. “But… later. I don't think I'm ready for that yet.”

Yuta brings his cup of Coke to his lips to hide his smirk. “No pressure, princess.”

Jisoo is absolutely hammered. 

To be fair, so are you. The ceiling seems to be spinning and the neon club lights are a little too bright that you have to squint your eyes every time you look up, but you’re not stumbling over your own feet like your friend on the dancefloor is doing right now.

“How does she do it?” Jennie sighs as she twirls the glass in her hand around mindlessly. Her other hand is cupping her face, elbow on the bar as the three of you take in the sight of Jisoo grinding on the dancefloor with a stranger.

Nayeon’s beside you, nursing her own drink in her hand. “You want to be like her? Really?” your best friend asks with a tilt of her head.

“Why not?” Jennie argues, waving a hand to punctuate her point. “That girl attracts practically everyone she sees. Me? I’m lucky if I find one decent guy on Tinder.”

“I told you nothing good comes from that app,” Nayeon shakes her head in disapproval, bringing her drink to her lips.

“Oh, give me a break!” Jennie sighs, leaning back in her seat in exasperation. “I know it’s not easy, but everyone deserves to find the Yuta to their Y/N, alright?”

“What?” you squeak, half-dazed.

Jennie sends you a smug smile. “I gotta admit, I’m jealous. You managed to bag one of the very, very few good guys on campus.”

You blink, opening your mouth to reply but Nayeon cuts in drily.

“Oh, that’s attractive.”

You follow her line of vision to where Jisoo is on the dancefloor, doing what you can only assume is her weird version of twerking.

You start snickering uncontrollably. 

You reach out to take a sip from Nayeon’s drink, but almost fall on your face when you do so – thankfully, she steadies you just before you could embarrass yourself.

“Alright, babe,” Nayeon chides, gripping your arm firmly. “That’s enough drinks for tonight.”

You groan. “Come on! I had, like, half the amount of what Jennie had. Can’t I have a bit mo–” A wave of nausea washes over you, and you hang your head down before you can finish your sentence.

Jennie appears beside you. She shakes her head, taking your other arm that’s free. “Bullshit. You’ve definitely had more than me,” she informs. You try to search for the usual telltale signs of her being drunk, but the dizzying array of light above stops you from really looking at her properly.

Nayeon hums in agreement. “Besides, Jennie can hold her alcohol well. You, my dear? Not so much.”

Another surge of sickness comes over your body, and you hang your head down in an attempt to let it pass. The pounding in your forehead grows as Nayeon and Jennie begin discussing something.

Nayeon taps your shoulder, her voice sounding far away even though she’s just next to you. “Where’s your phone?”

“Front pocket,” you mumble.

You don’t pay attention to Nayeon as she fumbles around in your purse, too focused on fighting off your nausea. Suddenly, a water bottle is placed in your hands and you’re not sure how, but you're grateful for it nonetheless as you greedily down its contents. Nayeon pats your back as you gulp down the water, and you could hear Jennie murmuring quietly into a call.

“Okay, Y/N,” Jennie finishes, and you look up to see tapping away at your phone, then she hands it back to you. You accept it with shaky hands. “Yuta will be here soon.”

You nod aimlessly, her words not really registering in your head. Nayeon clears her throat. “Yuta?”

“Your place is too far away, and Miss Lightweight here–” Jennie shoots you a sideways glance, “–will definitely throw up in the Uber if the drive takes too long.”

“Okay, yeah, but isn’t your place just nearby?” Nayeon replies, and there's something significant in her tone, but you can’t really tell what it is in your drunken haze.

“There won’t be space for all four of us,” Jennie shrugs, patting you on the shoulder and grinning widely. “Besides, I don’t think pretty boy would mind, would he, Y/N?”

You moan. “I’m gonna be sick.”

Nayeon guides the water bottle in your hands back towards your mouth. You don’t know how much time passes as your friends try to sober you up, but Yuta suddenly appears in front of you.

He’s looking very much out-of-place amongst the sea of stylishly-dressed people in the nightclub, seeing that he’s only clad in grey sweatpants and a black slogan tee that says I have no idea why I’m out of bed. 

Your headache a little cleared now, you’re able to manage a smile. “My knight-in-funny pajamas is here.”

The look of concern on Yuta’s face immediately melts away at your words. He rolls his eyes at you and turns to your friends. “Will you ladies be okay?”

Jennie nods. “Oh yeah, we’ll be fine. We were just worried about this messy drunk here,” she says and pats your shoulder affectionately.

You pull away indignantly, crossing your arms. “I’m not messy!” you protest, sliding off your seat. “Look, I can still dance a bit. Which move do you want to see–”

Yuta wraps an arm around your shoulders, shutting you up. “You’re a funny little thing, babe. Time to say bye.”

You wave defeatedly to your friends as Yuta leads you past the crowd of dancing people and out to his car parked outside. The ride to his place is surprisingly quick and quiet – he doesn’t turn on the radio, but you suppose you should be thankful because the rock music he would normally play would only make your headache worse.

“How much did you even drink tonight?” Yuta chides as he follows you into his apartment.

You shrug. “Um, not that much–”

“Bullshit.”

A smile tugs at your lips. ”Okay, fine. I don’t know – just, seven vodka shots,” you admit, but he keeps his gaze on you. “Ugh – and a few martinis, okay?”

Yuta shakes his head and turns to lock the door behind him. “The bartenders should have cut you off – all of you. I definitely would’ve.”

“That’s because you’re no fun!” you retort as you collapse onto the sofa – but the sudden swift motion makes you feel nauseous again, and you lay a hand over your face.

You hear a sigh, and suddenly Yuta’s hand is stretched out in front of you. “Hey, come on. Let’s get you into something more comfortable.”

You toe off your heels and gratefully take his hand. The familiar warmth returns, and you relish in the feeling as Yuta helps sit you down on his bed. You pay him no attention as he shuffles around the room and opens a few drawers. A minute later, you’re still fighting off your headache when he hands you a T-shirt, shorts and a towel. 

“I thought you should take a shower or something… it could help,” Yuta hesitates. His eyes flicker all over the room, and you wonder what he’s thinking of. “Um, there’s also a spare toothbrush in the cabinet. I’m going to see if we have any painkillers left.”

You reach for his arm. “Wait, do you have–”

“Saline solution? Yeah, it’s by the sink. I also have a case here somewhere,” Yuta releases himself from your grip. He heads towards his drawer and rummages around in it. “Ah, here you go.”

You take it gratefully. You’re about to open your mouth to speak, but Yuta leaves the room without another word, leaving you staring at the door in disappointment.

Sighing, you peel off your dress and enter his bathroom. The hot temperature feels absolutely heavenly and you’re not sure how long you were in there but when you step out, there’s a large glass of water and a painkiller on Yuta’s bedside table.

After putting on Yuta’s clothes and swallowing the pill, you’re about to leave the room to look for him when there’s a knock on the door. 

“You doing okay in there?” Yuta asks. “Can I come in?”

You open the door and he steps in.

“Just here to take a few things and I’ll leave you be,” he mumbles. You swear there’s a faint spray of pink on his cheeks when he lays his eyes on you – but since you’re not wearing glasses, you decide it’s just your eyes playing tricks on you.

Standing by the door, you could smell the sweet aroma of fresh coffee waft in.

“Did you make coffee? May I have some?” you ask hopefully. 

Yuta hums and shakes his head. “Absolutely not. Don’t want you any more dehydrated than you already are right now, darling,” he meets your eye. “Just finish that big glass of water I gave you.”

“You really are no fun,” you sigh in defeat, taking a seat on the edge of his bed. “You’re forcing me to sober up so I can drive myself home or something?”

You’re half-joking, but Yuta knits his eyebrows together. “Y/N, it’s almost 2 in the morning. You’re not going anywhere. Just crash here and I’ll drive you home in the morning.”

You rise and brush your fingers against his. “Wait, Yuta. You really don’t mind that? I didn’t know what to tell my friends… I’m sorry for dragging you into this,” you apologise timidly.

In the quiet of the night, you’re suddenly aware of how close his face is to yours – and you look at him. Really look at him.  His face is bare, and there’s a cute little mole next to his nose that you’ve never seen before. His brown eyes, warm as ever, stare into yours, and your heart starts hammering in your chest.

Yuta squeezes your hand, and the sensation sends a jolt up your arm. The sudden grin on his face does little to help the flutter in your belly. “It’s all good, babe. What kind of fake boyfriend would I be if I didn’t take care of my fake girlfriend?”

Something in you recoils at the word fake. It must be because you’re drunk – that’s the only explanation you can come up with at the moment. 

His eyes scan the walls of his bedroom, and his voice drops to a whisper when he looks back at you. “You should sleep here. I’ll take the couch,” he says as he reaches for the doorknob. “Goodnight, Y/N.”

Yuta shuts the door behind him, leaving you with nothing but silence. You let out a breath you didn’t know you had been holding.

A feeling tugs at you, and something about it lets you know that it won’t go away all that easily.

But it’s a problem for tomorrow. Shrugging it off for now, you reach for the glass of water on the bedside table and down it in three big gulps. You lay back against Yuta’s pillows. They smell like him, clean and incredibly comforting. The exhaustion of everything that’s happened that night finally weighs down on you, and you find yourself falling asleep soon after.

You’re feeling under the weather – or at least that’s the excuse you’re giving for skipping classes today.

You’re back in your own apartment, cuddling with Pumpkin on the couch. You’d informed your roommates earlier that you won’t be attending classes, and now there’s no one else in the apartment.

You’re scrolling through Instagram, trying to get your mind off the situation you found yourself in earlier this morning. Without your glasses, everything had quite literally been a blur when you woke up in an unfamiliar room, but it all hit you once you could make out the unmistakable shape of a guitar in the corner. 

Yuta wasn’t awake yet when you entered the living room – and you thanked your lucky stars for that. If he had caught a glimpse of you and your puffy, makeup-smudged face along with the dress from the night before that you could barely zip yourself into, it would've been absolutely mortifying. You don’t know how you managed to slip out the front door without stirring him, but as soon as you left his apartment you called Nayeon for a ride home.

Your best friend didn’t say a word when you’d slid into the passenger seat in your disheveled state, assuming you were too hungover to explain – and you were grateful Jisoo had already gone to campus when you’d arrived back home, for you were not in the mood to answer any awkward questions.

The doorbell rings.

“Pumpkin, could you get that for me?” you say idly, still scrolling on your phone. 

The orange cat doesn’t move a muscle, so you sigh and roll off the couch. When you open the door, the last person you expect to see is your fake boyfriend.

He’s dressed in a basic black T-shirt and skinny blue jeans, his red hair falling by his eyes and framing his face. You almost scream at how good he looks.

Before you can say anything, Yuta flashes you a blinding smile.

“Hey! Just wanted to check up on you,” he says, rubbing the back of his neck. The action is strangely out of character for him, but you can’t deny how cute it is. His expression softens. “Um, you left without saying anything and then I heard from Jennie that you’re skipping classes today. Is everything alright?”

Despite everything, you manage out a smile. “Oh, I’m… fine! I mean, still a little hungover… but fine.”

You stand there in the doorway, mind going blank. Yuta’s still smiling at you, waiting for you to continue, but when you stay quiet his gaze drops to the floor. You curse yourself because now the silence is much too deafening in your ears, but you have no idea if there’s anything more to say.

Yuta clears his throat. “Well, okay, I’ll get out of your h-”

“Hey, wait, um–” you grab his hand before he can turn away. “–thank you… for last night. And for checking up on me. You seriously didn’t have to do that. Like, you could’ve sent me a message or something.”

Yuta’s looking down at your intertwined hands, and when he looks back up at you, there's a smirk on his face. “Just making sure you didn’t get lost or fall on your face on the way home. Your friends would have my head on a platter if anything happened to you on my watch.”

You scoff, immediately letting his arm drop from your grasp. “I take my thanks back.”

Yuta grins. “It’s all good, babe. I’m just glad you’re okay.”

By the tone of his words, he sounds like he’s gearing up for a goodbye, and your thoughts are confirmed when he angles his body away, about to turn and leave.

But you don’t want that to happen. Not just yet. 

“Wait – do you wanna come in?” 

He pauses, then nods. You turn and lead him to the living room. Yuta sits himself in the seat adjacent to where your orange fur ball is still curled up, and surprisingly, he doesn’t growl. 

Pumpkin did not like him when they’d first met, the cat hissing at Yuta when he’d tried to pet him. 

“He doesn’t like the smell of fuckboys,” you had joked, to which Yuta gave you a glare. The cat made a point to growl whenever Yuta dared to come close again –  and again, the next few times he swung by your place, but that never deterred Yuta. 

“He’ll grow to like me, just like his mama did,” Yuta had declared with a wink, and you had rolled your eyes then. Yuta was never humble whenever it came to how well-liked he was by everyone. But his cocky remark seems to be proven now, when Yuta had given him a pat on the head and Pumpkin acknowledged him with a meow.

You fiddle with your thumbs. Now that you’ve invited him in, you’re not really sure what to do. Your idea for the day was to hide from the rest of the world (though if you were being honest, it was actually to hide from the very man that’s in front of you right now), but that was thrown out the window the second he showed up at your door.

“So, um… did you have any plans for today?”

You hope it’s a good conversation starter, because it’s all you can come up with at the moment. 

Yuta leans back in the seat, folding his arms and placing them behind his head. “I was going to go to a cafe and study there,” he shrugs. “And I was going to ask if you could come with me, if you’re up to it.”

“Come with you? What for?”

The smirk is back on his face. “So we can make good on our deal and finally take that selfie.”

You’re left speechless, and you must’ve taken too long to respond because Yuta frowns.

“If you’re not up to it, it’s fine. It was just a suggestion. Are you still sick? I should c–”

“No!” you interrupt his flurry of words, but the word sounded much sharper than you intended. You try to lighten the atmosphere with a laugh. “No, sorry, that sounds great. I just–” you look down at your worn out shirt and shorts, “–need to get dressed. Could you give me a minute?”

Twenty minutes later, you’re waiting for Yuta to come back with your drinks, sitting in a small booth in your favourite coffee shop. You hadn’t paid much attention to anything when you’d left your dorm, because on the ride over, your mind was on one thing and one thing only. 

The selfie.

You haven’t forgotten about it – in fact, it hasn’t left your mind, as the mere idea of posting a picture with Yuta on Instagram makes your brain short circuit. Especially when he insists that the two of you should pose like an affectionate couple. Plus, you were definitely against it when he first suggested it, but now the idea doesn’t sound so bad after all.

“Here you go,” Yuta flashes you a smile as he sets down your latte on the table. He’s holding a coffee of his own, and you raise an eyebrow skeptically when he slides into the booth next to you. 

“Didn’t you have coffee last night as well? Who even drinks coffee at that hour?” you ask him teasingly.

Yuta lets out a nervous chuckle, his hand finding the back of his neck. “Actually, coffee at night makes me sleepy. It’s weird, I know.”

You shrug and take a sip of your latte and sigh in contentment, shoulders relaxing as the sweetness of the drink warms something in your chest. You turn to Yuta with a smile.

“Y’know, I’ve been craving this ever since I got a whiff of what you made last night,” you confess. “Next time I drop by, you should show me your mix and brew me some.”

Yuta hums in agreement, then his eyes widen in recollection. “Oh actually, before I forget,” he reaches in his pocket before holding out the contact lens case you had used the night before. “You left this behind.”

“Oh… thanks,” you say sheepishly as you take it and put it in your purse. 

In your rush to leave this morning, you know you must have forgotten something as trivial as that. But the whole fiasco of sleeping over at Yuta's is really something you’d rather not remember right now. Or ever.

There’s something else you're curious about, so you shoot him a glance. “By the way, why do you have a lens case and saline solution? You don't wear contacts, do you?”

Yuta’s expression remains neutral, but for some reason he’s avoiding your gaze. “Well, actually… they belong to Johnny. I don’t know how his stuff got in my room.”

That would explain it – though you weren't aware that Johnny wore contacts. In high school, all you remember about him was that he was the star basketball player that the girls fawned over, not someone who would ever read enough books that he'd eventually need glasses to help with his vision – but you suppose after years of late night studying, any college student’s eyesight will get worse.

Before you can question him about it further, Yuta clears his throat and grins. “So, can we finally take that selfie, baby?”

“Yes, um…” you say hesitantly, your eyes dropping to the table. “So, how exactly are we going to do this?”

It’s not that you aren’t ready for it – in fact, you’ve decided that the selfie is a great idea – but your mind is still racking for poses the two of you could do. 

Yuta lays his hand over yours. “If you’re uncomfortable with it, let me know and we don’t have to do it,” he tells you before breaking out into a grin. “But I do have the perfect pose.”

You look at him questioningly. “What is it?”

With your glasses back on your face, you can clearly see a faint blush on his cheeks when he announces, “I smile at the camera while you kiss me,” he angles his face away and taps his cheek. “Here.”

You stare at him for a few beats, letting the words sink in. “Can’t it be the other way around?” you eventually reply, laughing nervously.

“Do you want it to be?” he asks you, tilting his head and he takes a sip of his coffee. “Because I don’t mind either way.”

You bite your lip in contemplation, Yuta still looking at you in curiosity. You let out a breath. “Um, why don’t we try both poses and you decide which one is best?”

“Sounds good to me,” Yuta replies, the grin easily making its way back to his face. He slides out his phone from his pocket and opens up the camera app.

“You ready?” he asks, putting the camera in selfie mode, and you nod. Yuta’s still sporting his big grin as he stares into the camera, and you pucker up your lips to kiss him.

You close your eyes and lean in. His skin is unbelievably soft when your lips touch his cheek, and you’re taken aback by his cologne hitting your senses. You hear the camera go off a few times, but it barely registers. When you pull away, you find that your breath is unsteady. 

“Perfect,” Yuta chuckles as he readies himself for the other pose. “You good for the next one?”

“Just–” you suck in a breath and shake your head. “Give me a second.”

You’re dizzy. The air feels thick, and you’re unable to think about anything except for his cologne. You clear your throat and manage to meet his gaze.

His smile falters into a look of concern, and something about it makes your heart flutter. “Y/N, if you’re not comf–”

“No,” you cut him off gently, taking his hand in yours and squeezing reassuringly. Your grip is steady, despite the thundering behind your ribcage. “I’m okay, honestly.”

Relief washes over his face, and Yuta hands you his phone with a smile. “Alright babe, your call.”

You put the camera in front of your face, ready to smile. 

You’re expecting a quick kiss – something sweet and brief, but what you don’t expect is Yuta’s hand finding the back of your neck. Goosebumps rise on your arms at the sudden contact, and your breath catches.

Then he leans in.

Yuta’s lips touch your cheek, the tips of his hair tickling the side of your face, and your heart’s beating so loud in your ears that you’re convinced Yuta could feel it with his grip on your skin. You close your eyes and melt into him. For a moment, it’s just you and him against the world.

“Um, Y/N, the camera…” Yuta’s breath is hot against your ear, sending a shiver down your spine.

“Oh, uh–” your voice comes out breathless and you almost scream at how embarrassing you sound. “–right.” 

Somehow, you’re able to move your hands and the shutter clicks a few more times. Yuta’s kissing you again, and you smile, his touch and his cologne enveloping your senses.

When Yuta finally pulls away, you brush your fingers to where his lips had been on your cheek. Your face is embarrassingly hot at this point, and you silently hope that Yuta wouldn’t notice. You run your hands down your arms in an attempt to steady your heartbeat – but it’s useless. Your heart is still beating erratically.

Yuta flashes you a smile as you give his phone back, your hands all jittery. But if he does notice it, he doesn’t let on. “Awesome,” he breathes as he swipes through the photos. “Do you want to take more pics with different poses or do you think this is enough?”

“I think that’s enough,” you blurt out a little too quickly. You curse under your breath before clearing your throat. The truth is, you don’t know if you could go through with taking more couple photos with Yuta without possibly passing out. You force yourself to speak again, though it comes out tighter than intended. “Um, so which one do you think is the best?”

Yuta sets his phone down and shakes a finger. “Ah-ah, you’ll just have to see it with everyone else when I post it later tonight,” he smiles, a mischievous glint in his eye. “Gotta surprise you a little bit, or else where’s the fun in that?”

You want to argue with him. Usually, you would – but your mind is still clouded by what happened moments earlier. 

All you can manage out is a quiet, “Just… make sure I look good.”

Yuta’s about to take a sip of his coffee when he smiles at you, something unreadable in his eyes. “Darling, you always look good.”

There’s something wrong with you.

You’re lying on your bed, eyes directed at the ceiling. Everything is quiet – the whirring of the fan overhead, Pumpkin purring beside you, the low rumble of voices coming from the other side of the wall – but it all pales in comparison to the persistent pounding in your chest.

It’s been hours since you left the cafe and Yuta had dropped you home, but since then, your mind hasn’t stopped replaying everything that’s happened.

You let out a groan, breaking the silence that blanketed the room. Pumpkin stirs from his sleepy posture, so you absentmindedly stroke his fur in apology. You roll to lay on your side and reach for your phone.

There’s nothing yet, so you set it back down.

You’ve been checking Instagram every few minutes – not obsessively, exactly (though if you were being honest, this might be the tenth time you’ve refreshed your feed) – but enough times that you’ve been disappointed with the lack of any new posts from a certain someone.

Between the regular Instagram checks, you’ve been huddled on your bed surrounded by pillows, staring at nothing in particular. You know your roommates have been home for quite some time now, but you had no energy to speak to them from the moment you got home.

When your phone pings, you hate how your heart jumps at the sound. You sit up, unlock your phone and see that you have a new notification.

yuu_taa_1026 tagged you in a post.

When you click on the post and the photo finally loads, you gasp.

He had chosen the second one – the one where he’s kissing you.

Your eyes are closed in the picture, an open-mouthed smile gracing your lips. He’s also smiling into the kiss, a real, genuine smile that’s a stark contrast to his usual cocky smirk. His caption is only two words, but it sends a flush of warmth throughout your body.

yuu_taa_1026: My gorgeous 🖤

A bittersweet feeling tugs at your chest and you bury your head in your hands. You don’t know why you’re feeling this way – and you sure as hell know that you shouldn’t be feeling anything.

Not over fucking Nakamoto Yuta, of all people. 

You still remember the words he had uttered when he proposed this fake relationship to you a few weeks ago. It replays over and over in your head – like some sick mantra.

I’m not looking for an actual relationship right now.

You throw your phone across the bed.

It means nothing to him. You know that, he knows that. It’s the exact reason why he came to you – so that nothing would be complicated.

But the way he looked at you after taking the photos didn’t feel fake – and the way your pulse still races just thinking about it doesn’t feel like pretend. You can still feel the way he touched you – the sensation of his hand searing into the back of your neck, the ghost of his lips still lingering on your skin, as if it had just happened just moments ago.

It’s still imprinted in your mind, the way the word darling had fallen from his lips, as if he’d called you that nickname for all of his life. And you can’t deny how the mere sight of his smile made you feel as though the sun shone from right inside you.

You let out another groan. This can’t be happening.

There’s a knock on your door, and you mumble out, “Come in.”

Both of your roommates stride in at your response. Jisoo doesn’t spare you a glance and heads straight for your closet like she usually does. Nayeon, however, sends you a look and takes a seat next to you.

“Are you okay?” your best friend asks as she looks down at you, her face threaded in concern.

“No,” you groan.

“What’s wrong with you?” Jisoo muses, sorting through your clothes. She phrases it more like a sentence than a question, but you decide to answer anyway.

“Nothing,” you murmur, laying a hand over your face. You rack your brain for an appropriate excuse. “I think I’m just stressed about finals.”

Nayeon raises an eyebrow but doesn’t say a word. Jisoo clicks her tongue, and you get a sense of what she’s about to suggest.

“Then let’s go out. Our senior Seulgi is throwing a party at her house tonight.”

Ah, like clockwork.

Nayeon opens her mouth to respond, but you beat her to it. “I’m not in the mood to fraternise right now,” you say icily.

Jisoo gasps, finally turning to face you and you see she’s got a hand over her heart. “Y/N! You know me better than that,” she scolds, and there’s no mistaking the irony in her voice. “Come on – no frat boys tonight. Just us girls, and lots and lots of booze.”

You shudder to think about drinking again as you’re still recovering from the sheer amount of alcohol you had consumed just last night, and you also wonder how Jisoo could suggest such a thing – considering the night before, she had as many drinks as you did, if not more.

Nayeon seems to read your thoughts, and she pats your arm gently. “I think we should go. To blow off some steam before the exams,” she whispers to you. “Take your mind off… everything.”

You suppose the buzz would be a welcome distraction from what you’re feeling right now – plus, Jisoo’s already holding up the perfect outfit for you to wear.

You smile.

“When do we leave?”

You fully believe that the universe hates you, because the second you step into Seulgi’s house, you spot an unmistakable mop of bright red hair amidst the small crowd in the lounge area.

You swallow your groan and duck into the kitchen, where Nayeon and Jisoo are greeting your seniors. After exchanging hellos with Seulgi and her friends, they give you the cups in their hands, mumbling something about how the punch may have already been spiked with something strong and they wanted the three of you to taste the punch in its purest form.

(Though you definitely wouldn’t have minded if the drinks did contain alcohol, as that is exactly what you want right now – but you don’t tell them that.)

You find yourself perched on the kitchen island minutes later, drink in hand as Nayeon sits across from you. Boxes are scattered around the kitchen, and you can see in an already-opened box that there are bottles of whiskey inside them. 

“Are you feeling better?” your best friend questions, eyeing you up and down.

The skirt you’re wearing is a little short and the breeze from outside causes goosebumps to travel down your legs, but you let out a nonchalant shrug.

“Yes,” you affirm, taking another sip of your drink. “Told you, I’m just stressed about finals.”

There’s a ghost of a smile on her lips.“You sure? It’s not because you’re stressed about someone…” she tilts her head, “someone who just happens to be in the next room?”

You freeze.

“You saw him too?” is all you can say, unable to meet her eyes.

“He’s kinda hard to miss,” Nayeon grins. And it’s true. You could spot Yuta’s red hair from a mile away.

You don’t say anything, not even when Nayeon sets her drink down and shuffles to get closer to you. You keep silent when she takes your hands, and she squeezes them comfortingly.

“Listen. I don’t fully know what’s going on,” Nayeon admits. “But whatever it is, you have to talk to him about it. Nothing good ever comes from keeping your feelings hidden.”

The second the words fall from her lips, the weight on your chest that hasn’t disappeared since this morning suddenly feels like it’s been lifted. Somehow, your best friend always knows the exact thing to say.

You squeeze her hands back and smile at her – a genuine, real smile. “I know. Thanks, Yeon.”

You sit there in silence for a few moments, hands still clasped together – that is until a couple of loud shouts echo from the hallway. A minute later, a disheveled senior pokes her head around the corner, a look of irritation on her face.  

“Can one of you come and help me? Jisoo’s locked herself in the bathroom and she’s crying or something, and she said she will only talk to one of you.”

“Oh God, that girl – I’ll take care of it,” Nayeon lets out a practiced sigh. She sends you a skeptical glance. “Will you–”

“Just go, I’m fine,” you wave a hand dismissively, and when Nayeon disappears with the senior, you take up one of the bottles of whiskey from the opened box. Unscrewing the cap and bringing it to your lips, you relish the strange sense of relief when the liquor runs down your throat.

You don’t know how long you sit there as the thud of music booms through the kitchen wall, but after you’ve finished downing two bottles, you decide to head towards the lounge. 

You’re definitely drunk now – you feel the buzz as you move your hips sway to the beat, and your mind is no longer focusing on things that you don’t want to think about right now. 

“Hey cutie, mind if I dance with you?”

You turn at the unfamiliar voice and find a stranger smirking at you. There’s a hungry look in his eyes that immediately makes you feel uneasy. Right on instinct, you take a step back and open your mouth to decline, but before you can say anything, a voice cuts in. “She has a boyfriend.”

Yuta’s standing beside you, a cold look on his face as he stares down the stranger. His normally warm eyes are now steely and sharp, and it sends a reckless thrill through you. He wraps an arm around your shoulders, to which you grab his hand in gratitude. 

The stranger lets out a scoff and spares you a glance. “When you get bored of him, gorgeous, come find me.”

He retreats into the crowd, though Yuta doesn’t stop glaring daggers at him until he’s fully out of sight. Once it’s just the two of you, Yuta lets out a sigh and shoots you a worried glance. 

“Are you okay?” he asks, his voice rougher than usual. You take both his hands and place them on your waist, while you wrap your hands around his neck, fingers brushing his nape.

You don’t reply, instead you say, “Let’s dance.”

At your request, Yuta smiles and starts swaying you back and forth to the rhythm. You take the opportunity to check him out. He’s wearing a plain white tee, dark ripped jeans and your favourite leather jacket, a silver chain necklace dangling from his neck. His red hair is left unstyled, just the way you like it – and when you gaze into his eyes, you realise he’s put on dark eyeliner.

He looks effortless, yet so fucking attractive.

You let out a sigh. “Gotta be honest, I didn’t think you’d be here.”

Yuta shrugs. “Neither did I, but… Johnny convinced me to let loose one last time before finals.” 

The smell of alcohol is strong from his breath, and because of the proximity, you wonder if he could smell the whiskey in your breath too.

“Johnny knows Seulgi?” 

“Johnny knows everyone.”

There’s a twinkle in his eye and he’s giving you such a toothy smile that you can’t help but look at him curiously.

“What?”

Yuta’s eyes scan your face and then your outfit, and for a moment you’re not sure if he’s going to answer you – but then he lets out a chuckle. “Nothing, it’s just… what I said earlier. I was right.”

“About what?”

Yuta bites his lip. “About how you always look good.”

Your pulse starts racing.

You don’t know if it’s the alcohol, the music or the dark lighting of the room that makes Yuta look so dangerously tempting.

All you know is that you really want to kiss him.

He’s still looking at you, something unreadable in his eyes. Your eyes drop to his mouth, and when you lick your lips in anticipation, you could see his face falter. 

Yuta looks away, clearing his throat. 

“Yuta,” you call, your voice finding its vitality. He looks at you again, but now you recognise what’s in his eyes. Doubt.

“Yeah?” he murmurs.

You lean in towards him, slowly – and to your satisfaction, his breath shudders against your neck. 

“I think you looked insanely hot when you got jealous just now,” you admit quietly, and he lets out a groan that makes you weak in the knees. “So hot – that I really wanted you to kiss me.”

“Really?” Yuta’s voice is dangerously low now, igniting a fire in your belly. He squeezes your waist and his touch only makes you want him more – but he’s still hesitating. There's a question in his eyes, as if he’s silently asking you if he should hold back. 

You don’t want him to hold back. Not anymore.

You grab his collar in desperation. “Just kiss me, please,” you almost moan, and he crashes his lips against yours.

It’s electrifying how fervently Yuta kisses you, his hands finding your jaw and his thumbs brushing against your cheeks as your mouths move in sync. The kiss is messy, desperate – and when you tug at the roots of his hair, the moan that he emits into your mouth leaves you aching in desire. The crowd blurs around you and everything fades.

Until the catcalls and wolf whistles are too loud to ignore – and then Yuta finally pulls away from you.

“Upstairs?” he mumbles breathlessly, foreheads pressed together as you both are panting heavily. Your heartbeat’s thundering and you can’t come up with any words, so you just nod, trailing behind him as he laces your fingers together and pulls you through the crowd and up the stairs.

Yuta pushes open the first door he finds and the two of you are barely inside the room when he’s kissing you again, his hands roaming your body with urgency. You pull away to take the jacket of his body and toss it onto the floor, before he leads you to the bed.

“You have no idea how fucking bad I want you,” he hisses, leaning down so he can kiss you again. It’s more intense than before, and when Yuta palms your clothed breast and you let out your first moan, he growls.

“Fuck, you drive me insane,” he mutters, lips leaving yours to kiss your jaw, and then your neck, and then his kisses trail lower and lower until his hands find the waistband of your panties. It’s there that his motions stop – and Yuta looks up at you, eyes dark and lips parted.

“Do you want this, baby?” he asks softly, his chest puffing up and down from shallow breaths.

“Stop talking,” you groan, pushing his head down to where you need him most. It’s all the permission he needs, so he swiftly pulls down your panties and tosses them aside. Yuta pushes your skirt up and you gasp at cold air hitting your core, but it’s immediately replaced by the warmth of his touch.

Yuta places his hands on your knees for leverage, and then he presses a kiss to the inside of your thigh. Your breath catches with each kiss from him – all of them slow and teasing that you’re left squirming and whining under his grip. 

You let out a soft cry when he finally puts his mouth on you, and the first stroke of his tongue sends you to heaven. You need something to ground you down, so your hands find his hair, and when Yuta hears the sounds that you’re no longer holding back, he lets out another growl and squeezes your thighs.

“You taste so sweet,” Yuta grunts, and the vibrations of his voice send sparks up your spine.

You moan in response, unable to form a coherent sentence. Yuta is reaching all the right places that you swear that you’re seeing stars. His mouth is hot, sucking gently and then changing rhythms until your legs are trembling with every flick on his tongue. Your moans grow even louder when he adds his fingers into you, scissoring you open.

Yuta’s grip has you paralysed, and you’re unable to move – but you feel your high coming on any moment, so you whine and pull at his hair as a warning.

“Mm, gonna come for me, baby?” he groans appreciatively, one hand reaching up to fondle your breast and the other now rubbing circles on your clit in just the right way. “Come like the good fucking girl you are.”

The overwhelming new sensations combined with Yuta’s encouraging praise send you over the edge, your orgasm washing over you like a wave. You can only moan in pleasure as you tug at Yuta’s hair for your dear life, all while he continues the motions against your core.

You’re still breathing heavily as the last remnants of your orgasm leaves your body. After getting up from his kneeling position, Yuta moves up the bed to be face to face with you, supporting his body weight by putting his arms by each side of your head and seizing all of your attention.

“Good?” he mumbles, his voice so impossibly deep that goosebumps rise on your skin. He leans down to kiss you and you taste your essence on his lips. You moan, gripping his arm with desire.

“Good,” you whisper, and you feel him smile into the kiss. His mouth then leaves yours to move further down, now leaving a trail of kisses along your jawline.

“Can my girl take a little more?” 

Though you’re still trying to catch your breath and your legs are still trembling, you can’t deny how fucking tempting Yuta looks on top of you. His red hair is all mussed courtesy of your fingers, his eyes darkened with lust and his plump lips glossy from giving you the best head you’ve ever had in your life. God, he is absolutely ethereal.

And you need him. 

All of him.

You grip the chain of his necklace and pull him close to you again.

“I need you, Yuta.”

Satisfied with your answer, he pulls you in for another messy kiss. While he nips at your bottom lip, begging for entrance, you guide his hands to the hem of your shirt. You could sense his hard-on pressing against your tummy, the sheer weight of it against your body making you shudder in anticipation. You tug at his sleeves, desperately wanting to feel his skin on yours now.

But Yuta’s not done teasing you yet. His hands stay on your waist, gripping firmly. He pulls away from the kiss and before you can complain, he ruts his clothed knee against your still-sensitive cunt. You gasp at the unexpected friction.

“Fuck, Yuta,” you moan shamelessly, curling a hand over his bicep. “Just fuck me, please!”

His fingers rest at the hem of your shirt when his eyes meet yours. You’re expecting him to rip all your clothes away now and finally give you what you’ve been craving from the moment he had kissed you in the dim light of that lounge room.

Without warning, he abruptly removes himself from you, muttering under his breath, “Shit.”

He scrambles to back away from you, getting off the bed and running a hand through his hair as he starts pacing around the room.

You look at Yuta in alarm. Your body is immediately exposed to the chilly air at the loss of contact, so you use the pillow next to you in an attempt to warm yourself up. The atmosphere of the room has changed so quickly in just a split second that you don't know what to think.

“Wh–what’s wrong?” you question anxiously. You can’t deny that your mind is still fuzzy from his touch, but any feelings of arousal you had fades away when you see the worried look on his face.

“Fuck, I’m so sorry,” Yuta groans lowly, burying his hands in his hair. You’re not really sure what he’s sorry for, but you’re also too afraid to ask. He stands rigid in the middle of the room for a few seconds before heaving a sigh and moving to sit at the edge of the bed.

“Listen, uh, I’m sorry,” he starts, though he’s unable to look at you properly. He tugs at the roots of his already messy hair. “It’s just – we’re both kind of fucked up right now. We… we shouldn’t be doing this, Y/N.”

Your heart shatters.

“Are you alright?” he’s looking at you now, eyes wide with concern. His lips are swollen from how intensely he had kissed you, the bulge in his pants still apparent. You would’ve laughed at how comical he looked if you didn't feel as though someone just punched you in the stomach.

Yuta lets out a breath. “I just th-”

“No, I get it,” you interrupt.

It takes you a moment to get up from the bed, and you pick up your underwear that was carelessly tossed onto the floor by Yuta moments earlier. You quickly put them on, ignoring how uncomfortable you feel with your arousal still dripping from you, before turning to him. 

“It’s okay, Yuta.”

Yuta’s expression shifts. “Really?”

You’re well aware of the amount of drinks you had consumed earlier in the night, but you feel more sober than you have ever been before. The alcohol in your system may have clouded your judgement and actions before this, but now you can see it. 

You can see it all, clear as day – like a revelation that’s been in front of you all along.

“It’s my fault,” you start, and despite the lump in your throat, your voice comes out steady. Tears are threatening to spill from your eyes, but you’re not going to give him the satisfaction of knowing that he made you cry. 

You would die before letting him know how much pain he’s caused you. 

You give a dismissive shrug. “I don’t know why I thought that you could… ever look at me like that. Then and now.”

You should have seen this coming. It stings, how you let yourself believe that there was a real chance that Yuta had genuine feelings for you.

How naïve you’ve been.

Yuta’s eyes widen when your words sink in. “No, Y/N, I-”

“I get it now. Things never change, do they?”

There’s dismay written all over his face, but you’re sure whatever he’s feeling pales in comparison to the knife in your chest. You knew this, you predicted this – nothing good ever comes from being tangled in Nakamoto Yuta's business. Yet here you are, standing in front of him with the last shreds of your dignity, body trembling from the sobs that threaten to spill. The room is suddenly spinning, and you wish that the floor would just crumble from underneath you and swallow you whole.

“Listen, Y/N-”

“Have a good night, Yuta.”

You ignore his protests as you close the door behind you. You wait until you’ve rushed down the stairs, past through the sweaty bodies in the living room and out of Seulgi’s house before you finally let your sobs tear through the night.

You can’t believe you let it happen again.

You were thirteen years old when Nakamoto Yuta first broke your heart.

He had been your first crush, and though every other girl seemed to fawn over the drop-dead gorgeous Taeyong and the confident Johnny, you had always been attracted to the studious and quiet Yuta.

His hair had been jet black then, and was a little longer than what the school rules probably allowed it to be. It curled a little over his ears and his fringe almost reached into his eyes every time you stole glances of him poring over his notes in class. Despite how he was the model student, always obedient to the teachers and focusing intently during lessons, you liked that there was still a small part of him that allowed himself to rebel.

“That guy? Really? He looks so grumpy and he doesn’t even talk to anyone,” your friends had said, affirming your suspicions that they thought it was just a silly infatuation.

And perhaps it was true – anyone would think that Yuta was aloof given how he never spared anyone much of a glance during lessons, or how he mostly spent lunchtime alone in the cafeteria.

But what your friends weren’t aware of was that Yuta had, in fact, spoken to you before.

One evening, you had gone cycling a few blocks away from home when you accidentally crashed onto the mailbox of one of the houses. You let out a cry of pain first – and then the anxiety kicked in, because your own house suddenly seemed so far away and you weren’t sure if you could walk all the way home.

As if the heavens heard your prayers, a boy of your age walked out of the house, immediately running to you in concern and asking if you were alright. 

You recognised him. He was the strange boy at school that never seemed to do anything outside of his studies. Despite the fact that your knee was scratched and blood was running down your leg, all you could focus on was how freaking cute he really was when you looked at him closely.

He helped you get off the ground, supporting you all the way into the house where he asked his mother to help you clean up the injury. The second you were bandaged up and told him you were completely fine, his worry melted away – and then he flashed you a smile and held out his hand, introducing himself as Yuta.

You ignore the fact that you already knew his name, too mesmerised by how blinding his smile was. Somehow, you were able to shake his hand and you introduced yourself – and the next few hours were spent watching reruns of Mr Bean while finishing cans of Dr Pepper. As the sun dipped low and you mounted your bike, you thanked him for the evening and promised that you now owe him one.

You tucked that memory down deep in your heart, a precious little secret that’s just known to you. You didn’t care that everyone else thought he was unapproachable because of the serious face he put on during class – all you knew now was that he could smile, and his smile was the prettiest thing you’d ever seen.

You were quite content to admire Yuta from afar and only speaking to him on occasion, fully knowing how important his studies were to him – because they were just as important to you too. But the stories of your peers asking their fellow classmates kept coming – and you couldn’t deny that the concept of going on a date intrigued you.

Months passed, and there was still no sign of Yuta going out with anyone. He was a little different now – he’d gotten a haircut, his social circle was growing and he started hanging out with more of the guys – but your crush on him was still going strong. 

It was on a Friday afternoon that you gathered the courage to finally ask him to go out with you. 

“Hey Yuta,” you greeted, smiling shyly. The locker area was crowded with your schoolmates and two of his friends were by his side, but you were determined to not let that bother you.

Yuta spared you a glance and closed his locker, slinging his bag over one shoulder. “Oh, hey.”

“Um…” you started, suddenly aware of the number of eyes on you. Whatever. You can do this. “I was wondering if you wanna… go out with me this weekend? We could go to the cinema, and… I don’t know, you can pick the movie.”

The boys flanking Yuta let out snickers and gasps were heard from all around you, to which you begrudgingly ignored.

But you took one look at Yuta and everything else faded away.

There was a frown on his face.

“Go out with you?” Yuta asked incredulously, like he was wondering why you would ever dare to ask him such a question. He eyed you up and down, and suddenly you felt very small under his gaze. “I don’t even know you.”

Your heart dropped to your feet and everything went silent.

You’re never been rejected before, but the stories you heard from your friends felt extremely tangible to you now. Yuta, a boy you thought was an absolute sweetheart, just rejected and humiliated you in public.

There was laughter. The rest of the world became clear again, and you heard it now, loud and distinct – everyone around you was laughing.

At you.

Tears stung your eyes but you blinked them back. You didn’t know how you found your voice, but you were somehow able to squeak out, “Oh! That’s okay, um, see you around then.”

You turned on your heel and ran out, but the sound of everyone laughing at your mortification, the sneers of his friends, the words of Yuta’s rejection still echoed in your head.

It echoed until you reached home and curled under your blanket, crying silently until you were all dried out.

It echoed for days, even when you decided to skip school for the next week because you knew everyone would just stare and whisper.

And that’s when you vowed to yourself: you would never, ever let Nakamoto Yuta hurt you again.

Nayeon hovers in the doorway, a pensive look on her face. “There’s someone here for you.”

You’re bent over a textbook, pretending to read a paragraph even though your brain hasn’t been processing any of the words on the page. The coffee you’d consumed earlier hasn’t helped much either.

You get up from your seat without a word, brushing past Nayeon and making your way into the living room. You feel her trailing behind you, and when you’re in the living room and reaching for the doorknob, Nayeon grabs your arm.

You turn to face her. There’s no mistaking the worry on her face, so you send her a tired smile and say, “It’s okay – I got it from here. Thanks.”

Nayeon squeezes your arm as a silent assurance. With that, she heads into her own room.

You push open the door and Yuta’s leaning against the wall, hands buried deep in his pockets. He doesn’t look good – though to be fair, you’re certain that you don’t look any better than he does. The cocky expression he usually wears is gone, aggravated by the heavy bags under his eyes. His red hair is even messier than normal.

You’ve never seen him like this before. 

If you were being honest, you’d thought that some sick, twisted part of you would find a little satisfaction of seeing him all tired and hollow – but the sight of him like this only tightened the ache in your chest.

“Hey,” Yuta greets quietly, eyes devoid of its usual flare or humour. “I didn’t know if I should come, but… I didn’t want to leave things like that.”

You don’t say anything, still gripping the edge of the door. 

You knew it was coming. You were expecting Yuta to show up at your door. 

But the events of last night are still fresh in your mind. The pain and the rejection felt all too familiar – and all the heartache Yuta has caused you came crashing down into you once more, like a thousand knives in your chest. 

You knew for a fact that Yuta would come to you eventually, but what you don’t know if you’re ready to accept what he’s going to say. You almost feel like slamming the door in his face and telling him to get lost, and that you never want to see him again.

Despite it all, Nayeon’s words echo in your head.

Nothing good ever comes from keeping your feelings hidden.

So you stay put.

But Yuta doesn’t meet your gaze. “I just wanted to say I’m sorry,” he lets out a breath. “Not for stopping us last night. I – I think I was right to do that. I mean, we were drunk, and we weren’t in the right place… especially because… of our history.”

Your throat runs dry. 

He finally meets your eyes, and you know that emotion blazing in his eyes all too well.

Longing. 

“It’s not an excuse, but… I was a stupid kid,” his nostrils are flared, and he runs a hand through his hair. “I felt like the odd one out back then, so I did it because I thought it would make me look cool.” 

You could see it now – the quiet, nerdy little Yuta earning validation from his friends for breaking a girl’s heart. And you almost laugh at the thought.

“I wanted to apologise to you, I swear. But you had already written me off by then, and – I couldn’t blame you for that,” Yuta shrugs like it’s nothing, but there’s a bitterness in his tone. “And it’s so, so stupid, but after that I couldn't stop thinking about you.” 

Yuta takes a step towards you, and your heart begins hammering in your chest. 

“I saw you. Everywhere. Every time I turned on the TV, there was a rerun of Mr Bean. Whenever someone was riding their bike in front of my house, I couldn’t stop thinking of you. Fuck, I couldn’t even drink sodas without remembering the Dr Pepper we had! And when my vision started to get worse, all I could think of was how you must’ve felt every time I made fun of you for wearing glasses.”

Yuta’s face is just inches away from yours. 

You can’t breathe. You don’t know if you ever knew how to.

Your heart nearly stops when he takes your hands, but you let him intertwine your fingers with his.

“Y/N, I – I’m not expecting you to forgive me or anything. I hurt you. I know I did. But I just wanted to let you know that I’m sorry,” Yuta sighs, his eyes finally landing on your face – and when it does, his voice cracks a little. “And if you let me have another chance, I’ll show you just how much you mean to me – for real this time.”

You don’t know how long you’ve been holding your breath, but you finally let it out. You keep your gaze on him – his eyes are full of pain and anguish, but you feel something.

It's a small part of you, beginning to heal.

Neither of you speak for a while, only letting Yuta’s apology soak in the silence. 

Until finally, you lean in, resting your forehead against his – and even after everything, there’s still the familiar warmth in Yuta’s touch, ever present and comforting.

“Yuta, I really appreciate you saying that,” you breathe out, and when Yuta’s eyes light up, you almost don’t want to go on with what you’re about to say next. You know you have to push through – even if it means that it’ll disappoint him. “But… it’s still too early. I – finals are coming up and I can't think about this right now and – and I just need some time.”

“All the time you need,” Yuta whispers, his breath hot against your face. He squeezes your hands – and it feels like a promise. “Whenever you’re ready, just know I’ll be waiting for you.”

When he pulls away, he’s wearing a smile – it’s a little weary, but you could see the light slowly returning to his eyes.

“See you around, Y/N.”

You watch his figure retreat down the hallway and disappear.

And for the first time since last night, you have a tiny inkling that everything will be alright.

Your life’s been quiet ever since finals ended.

Even though it’s now common knowledge between your friends that you don’t really have anyone to occupy your time, you’re still surprised that none of them have been pestering you to go out as they usually would.

Campus has quieted too – the frantic energy of everyone facing the pressure of their studies is long gone. With the early days of summer rolling in, the atmosphere feels warm and comfortable. 

Besides a text that you never sent and a couple of shared glances at the library, you haven’t spoken to Yuta since that day outside of your dorm – but his apology still lingers at the back of your mind, along with his promise to wait for you.

When Johnny told you earlier that he had been hanging out with Taeyong (read: around the music building), you had a vague idea of where he would be. There’s a little bench next to the building overlooking the campus gardens, perfect for a little peace and quiet – and that’s exactly where you find Yuta.

He doesn’t notice you approach at first, too focused on the view before him. There’s a guitar case by his feet, and you silently remind yourself to ask him to play a song for you one day.

“Yuta,” you call out gently.

At the sound of your voice, Yuta looks up at you, a twinkle in his eyes. “Well, well, look who survived the academic tornado.”

His tone is teasing, light-hearted, and you feel your knot in your stomach melt away already. You take the seat next to him. “Just barely, but yeah. I’m officially free now,” you declare. “And I’ve been thinking.”

He doesn’t say a word, staring at you intently. Your tone wasn’t hostile at all, but there’s still the uncertainty of what you’re about to say – and you can see it weighing on him, the caution in his eyes and the carefulness of his actions.

You take a deep breath and exhale. “That day – you were right. You did hurt me. And I hated you for it. I promised myself that I would never let you do it again – so I completely cut you off. I convinced myself that you were the monster that I wanted you to be,” you admit, sparing a glance at him. Before you realise, mirth seeps into your words. “God, it was frustrating, because I still had to see you all throughout middle school and high school – and when we graduated and I thought I was finally free of you, somehow we still ended up at the same college.”

Yuta chuckles, light and slow, and the sound sparks something in your chest.

But you're not done speaking yet.

“Maybe I did hate you at first. But I think over the years, it just turned into annoyance – especially when we started fighting for the top spot in class and you started calling me Glasses.”

You fiddle with your thumbs. You’re grateful that Yuta hasn’t interrupted to say anything yet, because you’re still untangling the thoughts in your head.

“Still, after all those years of convincing myself and everyone else that I hated you, I don’t know if I can just take that all away so quickly,” you confess, and take his hand. Slowly, but surely – a smile starts to form on his face. “But I’m ready to give you a chance, Yuta. I’m willing to try, if you are.”

Yuta's fully grinning now, and he brings your hand up to his face to plant a kiss. The brush of his lips against your skin sends butterflies through your stomach. “I am,” he vows. “More than anything.”

And your heart soars. 

You really want to kiss him again.

So you lean in – and Yuta’s face is flushed in pink when you place a kiss on his cheek. Your hand is still clasped in his, but you don’t let go. You don’t want to.

“So…” Yuta begins, tilting his head. His eyes are alight now, and it sends a warm flush through you. “Will you go on a date with me tonight? A real one this time?”

“Yes… on one condition.”

“Anything,” he says, squeezing your hand.

“No fancy dinners or anything like that, please,” you assert, and when you see the curiosity in his face, you let out a laugh. “Let’s just… take it slow.”

“Slow,” Yuta repeats, then slowly raises an eyebrow. “Unless I tell you that I’m willing to take my shirt off right now?”

You roll your eyes, nudging him in the shoulder. “Don’t push it, Nakamoto.”

He grins at you, the corners of his eyes crinkling in the most adorable way. You sigh in contentment and pull him close, wrapping your arms around him as he melts into your embrace.

You don't know what the future holds, but you’re certain that in this moment, you're content to sit and enjoy the pretty view, holding hands with the prettiest boy you've ever seen.

TAGLIST  ☆  @greenyweirdo @dontlethismagicdie

© rainverry, 2025

[multi-fandomdisaster]

Oh boy! It's time for me to project myself onto a fictional character!!!

Hear me out: Ted with undiagnosed ADHD

He's gotten...okay-ish at masking it over the years, but he cannot sit still and just focus for the life of him and he has no idea why. It's a damn good thing that his job doesn't really matter all that much in the long run company-wise, because he HARDLY gets anything done because he can't focus on it because it doesn't interest him all that much. His daily rounds of the office where he goes around and bothers everyone else is primarily because he gets bored as shit just sitting in an office chair trying to slave over whatever the heck he's supposed to do that day and he feels like he's gonna go insane if he doesn't move around and talk to people. Having his own office is simultaneously a godsend and a curse, because on one hand he'd occasionally get overstimulated by the sounds of the rest of the office while he's just trapped there at his desk unable to do anything to de-stress and instead has to pretend like he's working because he's definitely not and he's 100% wasted about an hour and a half instead thinking about the fact that he should be working and isn't, but on the other hand with his own office he doesn't have anyone body-doubling for him anymore so there's literally nothing pressuring him from getting distracted and doing something else. Any time anyone talks to him he has to put all of his mental effort into trying to focus on them that he sometimes misses the entire conversation because he was focusing so hard on focusing on them. He's been banned from clicky pens in the office because he likes the sound and it drives everyone else (especially Paul) crazy. He thoughtlessly drums and taps his fingers on everything from tables to doorframes to his leg to whatever solid object is in front of him and/or in his hand. He's missed a good amount of company events on accident because he forgot the date (the only dates he has actively memorized are his birthday and the day that he lost Jenny), and so every time there's some kind of special event, he tries to make it a habit to write it down over and over again on post-it notes and stick them everywhere around his home and his office. There was more than a couple of times that he entirely forgot to pick Pete up from places because he was either too zoned in on his routine to remember that he was supposed to be doing something different or was like- watching a movie or something and forgot he had a brother entirely.

Do you see my vision? Or am I just going insane?

[smolwritingchick]

The Bangtan Gal Chapter 93- Our First Time

Summary: Jennie celebrates her birthday in Japan and Jungkook makes it a memorable one.

Genre: Jungkook fluff! And smut! (A for effort on the smut! I'm sorry if you're a bit disappointed with the smut writing but I'll continue to get better. Practice makes perfect!)

Words: 15,000+ 

Author's Note: It's been a while! I missed writing this story, I'm happy to be back at it. I missed you all dearly! I have been overthinking the HECK out of this chapter. Like ideas kept coming but then I was worried cause it was like ah...is this too much or not that realistic? I had a vision but I kept going back and forth regarding realism and contemplated deleting stuff but then I wanted to keep it. So, I hope you enjoy this and it was worth the wait. I wanted to make it romantic, fluffy, intimate, and a bit vulnerable in a way. I mean this is a critical point in their relationship and I didn't want to screw it up.

I just feel like these two will be comfortable with each other and certain about their love. Everyone especially black women should be loved on and cherished by their significant other and I thought a lot about how Jungkook would feel in this moment with Jennie in the story after pinning for her for so long. 

I'd say Summer Walker's Nobody Else and Best Part by Daniel Caesar & H.E.R is super relatable to JenKook. Loveeee these song so much. Both are so beautiful and always get me in my feelings.

Also: context on Booker T and his Spinaroonie which will be mentioned in the story. Black wrestlers mean a lot to me and he has been a huge part of my childhood.

Soon after chilling for a bit, and celebrating my birthday on May 10th, I will be working on my wrestling story next to update that and then I will be back writing the next chapters for Bangtan Gal. There will be two chapters updated for this one, the Muster chapter which will have Jin and Jennie's wrestling match, and then the next story chapter :)

So, bear with me for the slow updates. It may take a bit but I will try my best to not take forever. Again, thanks for sticking with me and I hope this was ok. Lemme know what you think! Until next time!!

Currently me after uploading:

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A loud sigh escaped Jennie's lips as she sat down in the middle of a wrestling ring. Here she was alone at Big Hit, in one of their rooms which had a standard sized wrestling ring for her and Jin to practice for their next match. Lately, it had been used as a private room for Bangtan's Oldest and Youngest members and held a lot of gym equipment as well. 

For a while now, Big Hit proposed for Jennie and Jin to get professional wrestling lessons. Jin stuck with learning the basics but Jennie wanted to learn more and asked for extra lessons as wrestling had started to become a new hobby for her. Despite the soreness and occasional bruising she'd endure while training, wrestling was fun and stress relieving. Their professional lessons were a few days a week as they learned the basics and prepared for their choreographed match to make sure things went well. Juggling dance practice, recording music, events, and wrestling lessons took a while to adjust but the two members remained dedicated and wanted to put on a great video for ARMY when it was time to record their match.

Big Hit wanted to ensure their safety as well and thought professional wrestling lessons would help. Because at the end of the day, Jin and Jennie were still idols and the last thing the company needed was two of their artists injured off of wrestling. And Jennie knows from watching WWE that those wrestling injuries are no joke. She was grateful every day for not suffering a serious injury and hoped to keep it that way. 

Since her hair was dyed red, Jennie wanted to portray WWE's Lita for their next match while Jin was still researching which wrestler to portray. Since the matches are predetermined, Big Hit wanted Jin to win which made sense to Jennie and she was all for it. For the past week, Jin and Jennie would go over what they wanted to do for the match and their trainers were extremely helpful in making their vision come to life while assisting in producing the match.

With it being evening time and everyone had left for the day, Jennie stayed behind to practice while wearing some shorts, knee pads, and a tank top. She wanted to get a few moves down and hoped to perform them better as she kept jumping off the top rope safely onto a padded mat to pretend it was her opponent.

After drinking water, she stood on her feet and stretched.

"There you are!" Jungkook's bright voice filled her ears as she turned around and smiled.

"Hey! Sorry, Jungkook, I should have texted you. I wasn't ready to go, yet. I wanted to train a little bit more,"

"It's all good, honey. What are you working on?" he strolled over to the ring and went in, wearing a hoodie with the hood over his head and sweatpants.

"My moonsault. You know the move where you backflip off the top rope and onto your opponent lying on the mat?"

"Yeah! I know the move," he reached out for her and wrapped his arms around her waist.

"I'm sweaty," she giggled and tried to pull away but he wouldn't budge.

"I don't care," 

He smiled and leaned down to give her multiple kisses on her lips which she immediately returned, smiling into the kisses. 

"Show me what you got with the moonsault. I can help you," he said while she looked at him in surprise as they pulled away.

Jungkook even learned a bit of wrestling just in case he wanted to participate in future matches. He was still trying to convince the rest of the members to join but so far no luck. But hopefully one day.

"A-are you sure? I should practice more on the big mat first," she said with a hint of nervousness.

"I'm the Golden Maknae, I got this," he flashed a big grin. "Where do you want me, Jagi?"

"O-okay. Um, let me move the mat and you can take its place," she pulled the mat to the other side of the ring while Jungkook got on his back.

"All set! Let me know when you're ready, Jennie,"

Nervousness continued to overwhelm her as she replied, "Kookie, are you sure this is a good idea? I don't think I'm ready to perform it on someone just yet,"

"You never know unless you try! Come at me. Let me see what you got,"

"Fine, fine. Stay still," she got up the top rope, trying to remember everything she could for the move. "Three...two...one...go!"

She backflipped off the top rope gracefully and landed right on him. However, a loud groan escaped his lips as her knees landed on his stomach instead of her torso, which made her freak out.

"Ah! Oh my God! Are you okay!? Why am I such a klutz!?" she got off of him to see him clenching his stomach with his face twisted in discomfort. 

Oh, this was so bad. She knew she shouldn't have decided to practice on him. All that training went out the window as she saw her man in pain. 

She cupped his face while he continued to clench his stomach. "Kookie, I'm sorry! Are you okay!?"

"Yeah..." he grunted, '"We'll work on it,"

"I am SO sorry!" she exclaimed after releasing him. "I did so much better, earlier! I promise, I did! I just miscalculated! I can do it, better! But I'm not quite ready to do the move on someone! Ah...why did I agree to this!? My knees were on your stomach! God, I know that had to hurt. And I got my knee pads on, too? Sheesh!"

As he watched her ramble, Jungkook couldn't help but laugh and stopped clenching his stomach, sitting up.

"You're cute when you freak out like this," he giggled.

"You're not hurt!?" she exclaimed.

"I am a little. My stomach hurts but I was exaggerating the pain. It doesn't hurt that bad," 

"I-you idiot! Don't do that!" she smacked his arm, making him laugh again. "You had me thinking I injured you! I was about to freak out and cry to Bang PD!"

"Wow, you were going to do that? I should have kept up the act,"

"Shut up!" she giggled as they both stood up. "You're a piece of work, you know that?"

"So, I've been told," he smiled and placed a warm hand on her cheek, brushing his thumb against it. "You did good, babe. You just gotta work more on the delivery of your moonsault. I say Jin stands no chance against you in the high flying department,"

"Thank you. I'll keep practicing on the mat, for now," she kissed his cheek and placed the mat where it was before.

"How are you and hyung coming along with the match?" he asked as he stood across in a corner, leaning against the top turnbuckle with his arms crossed.

"It's going so well! Jin still gotta figure out who he wants to be. I gave him some suggestions, so he's researching to get one of their personas down. And once he does choose the wrestler, then the trainers can try to teach him some of their moves to add to the match. I lowkey want him to be Booker T from WWE. I told him earlier as a suggestion and he said he'll think about it. But yo, if he chooses him that would make my day. To watch Jin do the spin-a-roonie though...that will have me crying," she laughed at the idea with Jungkook.

"Can you dig it, SUCKA~!" Jungkook said Booker T's wrestling catchphrase in English with Jennie as the two laughed again.

"Yeah, hyung would be so extra with his persona. I can't wait to see who he decides to be. And I'm looking forward to being front row to watch it this time instead of on video,"

"Haha, you're in for a treat. Man, all this makes me want to go to a WWE event one of these days. If we're back in America and they're doing a show close to where we are, I want to go!"

"I hope so too, so you can go. I'll come with you,"

"It's a date!"

"Speaking of dates, we still need to go to a rock concert together like you wanted,"

"Yeah! I gotta research that too whenever we are free. I have no idea who will be on tour but no matter what we have to do GA! And we must crowd surf! It's gonna be fun, I promise!"

The lovers could see the date now. She was on top of his shoulders, singing the lyrics to whatever song was playing from one of her favorite bands while he vibed and smiled at her having the time of her life. It needed to happen soon. 

As she continued to practice her wrestling, Jungkook's eyes began to roam down her body, as he pondered about his self control. Her dark skin glistened in the lighting of the room from the sweat of her workout and her hair was in a messy bun. Every day the want for her increased and her birthday couldn't come fast enough with the way his body reacted to her. He wondered if she felt the same.

As her birthday drew near, Jungkook's anticipation and nervousness kicked in tenfold. It was a huge step and he hoped everything would go well and he could make her feel how wanted and loved she is. 

"Did you hear me?"

"Do what?" Jungkook snapped out of his trance and looked into her eyes.

"I asked, since you're here do you want to train with me, too?" she repeated.

"Yeah, why not. I could use a workout before we go back," he took off his hoodie to show his tank top, revealing his muscular arms as her eyes eagerly checked them out.

Now this was a little dangerous. Jennie was already trying to keep herself in check to not let her dirty thoughts get to her. Shaking the thoughts away, the two trained back and forth, practicing moves. She was grateful for it and it was nice to have a partner to assist. But as time went on, she began losing focus because, in the back of her mind, her desire to be intimate with her man had gotten stronger, these days. But maybe...just maybe...

Jungkook currently had his arms around her from behind in a waist lock while she struggled to get out of it. With him breathing down her neck and his firm arms holding her, she seemed to have completely lost focus. 

Abruptly, she pushed back against him to grind, making him sharply inhale.

"You know that should be a disqualification," he said in her ear as his hands began to roam down her body.

"Hm, well, there is no referee in sight. So, what now?" she turned in his arms. 

Before he could reply, she pulled him by his shirt to smooch him as he groaned softly against her mouth. Their kissing became needy and his hands traveled down to her ass, squeezing it. She gasped at the sudden action which led him to slide his tongue into her mouth and lift her up as she wrapped her legs around him. As he proceeded to walk forward to press her up against a corner, Jennie cupped his face and held onto him.

She wanted him so badly. She was ready and felt herself getting aroused that she didn't even care where it was as long as it was with him. With Jungkook, as much as he wanted to touch her and lose control, he didn't want it to be abrupt like this. With every last restraint, he set her down and reluctantly pulled away, running a hand through his messy hair.

"Did I do something wrong?" she asked, catching her breath from their passionate kissing.

"No, of course not. I want this and I want you. Believe me when I say I've been wanting to touch you and make you feel amazing for a long time, now. But you deserve a bed, Jennie,"

Her heart fluttered at how serious he sounded about that.

He stepped forward and placed his hands on the top rope, connected to the top turnbuckle, trapping her in the corner. "And I want to take my time and kiss every inch of you...and I want to hear you say my name again when I make you feel things no one else can because you're mine...but not now. Not here. It'll be on a bed. And soon. I promise,"

"You say that and expect me not to pounce on you? You're giving me images that I want to become a reality, now,"

"You do the same to me,"

"And I was only going to ask for you to come to my studio. I mean...there is a couch,"

He chuckled at the suggestive thought. "And a bed for your first is even more inviting,"

"Touché,"

"Wait a little longer for it, okay?"

She smiled and nodded. "Okay. I know it'll be worth the wait,"

He returned her smile and leaned back in to kiss her passionately, not ready to let her go just yet. However, their making out was cut short when they failed to realize the door opening. A loud clearing of someone's throat was heard, making the couple quickly back away and turn to who was there.

Of all people...it was Bang PD. 

'This would be my luck...' Jennie thought to herself as she bowed with Jungkook apologetically. 

She was mortified while Jungkook blushed out of embarrassment. 

Jennie thought everyone left but then she realized she had forgotten Bang PD had told her he would also stay late to finish up some work. He must have come by to say goodbye to her since he was done.

"Jennie..." Bang PD let out a sigh, shaking his head as he looked at the couple.

These kids...boy was he amused at the scene. 

"Y-yes, sir?" she answered, flustered.

"When you told me you would be staying late to practice, I didn't mean making out in the ring with Jungkook. You two should be working," he replied with his arms crossed.

He scolded them for not focusing on training and then laughed about it in the end, wishing them a good night and to next time focus on work. After he left, Jennie and Jungkook glanced at each other and ended up laughing at the embarrassment.

"Oh my God...I can't believe that just happened," she got out of the ring with him. "We are NEVER telling the boys about this. This is going to the grave,"

"I second that. Do you think he's going to mention this to anyone?" he feared.

"Oh, fuck outta here, I hope not!"

----------

"I cannot believe this..." Jennie grumbled with her arms crossed as she sat in the van with the members, on their way to the airport.

She had her fair share of goofy moments but this right here was currently number one. The boys were struggling not to laugh as they snuck glances at her wearing a large Pikachu Onesie. The reason? Losing a bet with Jungkook on who could beat who in Smash Bros, last night. She tried her hardest but he prevailed in a best out of 5.

"You look adorable," Jungkook giggled.

"Be quiet," she snapped at him in a playful tone, earning another giggle from him. "I can't believe I have to walk out in public with this on. Why? You know Dispatch is going to be there taking photos."

"You did bring it on yourself. You should have beat him in the game," Yoongi chuckled.

"Wow." she shook her head. "I am loving the support, right now,"

Bangtan had some fan events in Japan just before their 3rd Muster in Seoul and were headed to the airport to get on their flight. Once they arrived at the airport, fans and reporters were already there to take videos and photos. Jennie watched as the members and staff made their way out of the vehicle as she tried to mentally prepare herself to be seen with the onesie.

About to get out of the car, Jin turned back to her and chuckled. "Are you coming?"

Seated next to him by the window, she groaned. "Yes..."

With a smile, Jin helped her out of the car and surprised sounds from the crowd were heard when they saw her in the onesie, along with giggling and various comments on how cute she looked. Being a good sport, Jennie grinned and waved at the cameras, walking inside the airport with everyone else.

She laughed, forgetting about the embarrassment, and began to pose, with the members. Miss Bangtan even started playing the part of Pikachu, while reporters ate it up. After photos, the group started going to the destination of where their flight was as the large group of fans and reporters followed them.

"Jennie-ah, why are you wearing a Pikachu onesie?" she heard a fan ask who was recording her with their phone.

"I lost a video game bet against Jungkook," she grinned sheepishly, earning giggles in response.

Safe to say, her look went viral and became an instant classic BTS moment for ARMY as they tweeted their thoughts:

'Look at Jen-kachu!'

'The fact that she agreed to this lmfaooo.'

'Jungkook was the cause of this!? LOL the Golden Duo never has a dull moment!'

'Wait I thought this was photoshopped! WHAT!?'

'Jennie blessing us with her cuteness!'

'I deadass thought it was a joke but Jennie is actually at the airport as Pikachu!'

'Hahahaha not Jennie getting caught in the mix of losing bets!'

'I LOVE cute Jennie! This made my day!'

--------

Because of her birthday, the staff treated Jennie to have her own suite in the hotel BTS stayed while the rest of the members roomed with each other. The room was huge as it even held a kitchen, which Jungkook was currently using to his advantage while Jennie was out eating with the Hyung Line for her birthday. Jungkook's birthday plans for Jennie were in motion as he and the rest of the Maknae Line decorated her suite with balloons and other birthday accessories. 

"She is going to freak!" Jimin beamed.

"Yeah, this looks like it's going to be her best birthday, yet! You gotta tell us her reaction when she sees the room," Taehyung added.

Jungkook grinned as he decorated. "I will! You two okay continuing to decorate? I want to start the cake,"

"Yeah, go ahead! I still can't believe you're going to bake for her. This is adorable," Jimin giggled.

Jungkook wanted to go all out for her birthday and thought of baking for her. She always baked for him and the rest of the boys. It would be sweet to have her receive a cake that was made from the heart. The Golden Maknae researched some good birthday cake recipes and chose to bake a small red velvet cake for her. 

He whipped out all the ingredients he purchased the night before and placed them all on the counter to begin while the oven was preheating. Getting right to work, Jungkook was diligent in making sure he followed the directions and mixed the ingredients while checking to see if the measurements were fine.

"Do you know what you're doing?" Taehyung teased while walking over to him, trying to throw him off as he mixed everything in the bowl.

"Go away!" Jungkook playfully shouted at him, turning away.

"You sure you don't need help?" Jimin added to the teasing.

"No!" Jungkook exclaimed. "You two just continue decorating and stop messing with me,"

However, Jimin and Taehyung decided to continue messing with him by playfully hitting him and throwing some decorations his way, which resulted in Jungkook setting the nicely mixed bowl down and running around the suite to chase them. It didn't take too long for him to beat them up before going back to working on the cake. Once in the oven, Jungkook put a timer on his phone and continued to decorate with the guys.

"What do you plan to do with Ennie when she returns?" Taehyung asked.

The question caused Jungkook to smile to himself as his heart leaped. To spend the day with the girl he had fallen for and was proud to call his girlfriend was something he'll cherish forever. He wanted everything to be perfect because she deserved the world. For her birthday, Jungkook convinced his hyungs to let him and Jennie have the entire day together. He was happy they all agreed and that he'd have some sweet alone time with her. He thought long and hard about how he wanted to spend the day and hoped she loved what he had planned.

"I have it all planned out but don't want to jinx myself and give it away. I just hope to make it as special as possible," Jungkook answered with joy. 

"No matter what you do, she'll love it. I mean it's Ennie. She appreciates everything we do for her,"

"And we're happy to see you be the best boyfriend for her. Our ship is still sailing strong, isn't it Tae?" Jimin praised.

"Indeed!" Taehyung high fived him with enthusiasm.

Jungkook chuckled and blushed at the kind words. "I sometimes still can't believe she's mine. I'm really happy I told her my feelings, that day,"

"Us too, Jungkookie," Jimin patted his back. 

After Jimin and Taehyung left, Jungkook went to where the bedroom was to start decorating it. She had told him she was ready and he hoped that tonight would be special for the both of them for that first time. To take that next step in the relationship. 

Later, his phone began to buzz and he took it out of his pocket to see a text from Jin.

Jin: We're back at the hotel! Meet us in the lobby.

JK: On my way!

--------

To Jennie, she was with the rest of Bangtan and patiently waited for Jungkook. Her tummy was full from the delicious breakfast and she had a big smile on her face. Her birthday had been filled with great vibes so far and she couldn't wait to see what else was planned today. 

"Jennie~!" Jimin ran up to her with Taehyung to embrace her. "Happy birthday!"

She giggled and returned the hug enthusiastically. "Thank you~! I feel so loved! First, it was the breakfast, and now the hugs from you and Taehyung!"

"I'm glad you're enjoying your day so far. It's only going to get better,"

"Ooh? More surprises? I wonder what's next. That breakfast hit the spot. Japan has some amazing food,"

As they all chatted, Jungkook finally came down on the elevator to see Jennie chatting with the guys. Sensing his presence, she turned and grinned. 

"Kookie!" she waved as he strolled over to her.

"Happy birthday!" he grinned and embraced her tightly, spinning her around as he lifted her in his arms.

"Thank you!"

"We'll leave you two, to it," Namjoon smiled and began walking to the elevator.

"Yes and please just stay safe. And no, I will not blow up your phones to get updates. I promise," Jin chuckled and waved, following Namjoon.

"Have fun, today! We'll see you, eventually," Jimin giggled and left with the rest of the members.

"Oh? They're all leaving? Even Jin? What a surprise," she said in wonder. "So, it's just us?"

"Yeah, you're with me for the rest of the day," Jungkook proudly said.

"What?! Oh, that's perfect! How'd you get them to agree? Especially Jin?"

"I am the Golden Maknae," he grinned.

"You always say that shit, give me the details! I want a proper answer," she playfully hit him.

"Haha, I told them I'd treat them to Korean beef when we return to Seoul. So, they were fine with that. They eagerly agreed once I mentioned food,"

"I like that. So, where to?"

"You'll see. Let's go,"

As they were en route to their destination, Jennie continued to scroll on Twitter to see the sweet messages from fans for her birthday. And then she smiled when ARMY began to notice that Nike and a Nike PR followed her Instagram. She was excited to announce her being sponsored by Nike and was just waiting for the OK.

As soon as they made it to the destination, Jennie looked around in awe.

They were at Universal!

"Universal Japan!? Oh, hell yes! We about to have a TIME, today!" she cheered and put a black mask on with him as Jungkook laughed at her enthusiasm, agreeing.

After they checked in, they walked inside the park while Jennie looked around, amazed. She always wanted to check out amusement parks in other countries. She can check this off her bucket list.

"Follow me," he said as she walked closely with him.

"Oh, wait! I wanna take a photo with Hello Kitty!" she pointed out the mascot taking photos with the children.

Jen waited patiently for her turn, smiling under her mask at the adorable kids. Then, she kept her mask on and posed with the peace sign while Jungkook snapped the photo. She'll be sure to tweet it on Twitter, later.

Walking inside one of the stores, the large variety of headbands caught her attention.

"Soooo many options! Look at all these headbands," she looked through them.

After looking around, the two decided to get matching headbands. Once they put them on, they took cute selfies together and even some silly ones. As they walked further into the park at Universal Japan, Jennie began to hear the Harry Potter theme song, taking her by surprise.

"Wait a damn minute...are we-are we going to Harry Potter World!?" she exclaimed. Once she turned to Jungkook and saw him nod happily, she jumped and squealed excitedly. "What!? Oh my gosh! Wait, you took the test!?"

"I did. I'm a Ravenclaw,"

"Ahhhh! It suits you! So much to do! Okay! We gotta get wands! We gotta do the whole thing. We gotta go on the rides, we gotta get butterbeer, get the outfits, everything! You ready?" she giggled excitedly as he smiled, thinking it was the cutest thing.

"Lead the way,"

"That's what I'm talking about!" she grabbed his hand as they wandered around.

Jungkook had brought a camera with him and had been filming her since their arrival. Smiling as he filmed, he observed as she looked around the area, geeking out. This was so going towards a future GCF for their relationship reveal.

"Ah~! It's just like the movies! I feel like I'm actually in the movies!" she beamed.

After picking up their wands and robes, they check out Three Broomsticks to eat lunch.

"Here we go! Butterbeer! Let's see..." Jennie checked out the options they had.

"Should we get cold or hot butterbeer?" Jungkook pondered.

"Let's get both and try it together,"

After ordering food and two cold and two hot butterbeer beverages, the couple sat together and ate while discussing how much fun they were having so far.

"Okay, the moment of truth. You filming?" she grinned as she watched him with his camera.

"Yes, milady," 

"Okay! Let's see if butterbeer tastes as good as everyone says! I'm going to try the cold one first," she presented the cup and began to take a big sip.

"And the results are...?" he asked with anticipation.

"This SLAPS!" she praised and took another sip, enjoying the delicious taste and cream on top.

After watching her praising the cold drink, Jungkook filmed himself trying the drink and nodded in approval, enjoying it as well. Turning the camera back to her to film, she presented the hot butterbeer next. 

"Okay! Now for the hot one!" she announced and began to take a careful sip. "Oh, I like this, too. Very rich taste. And I feel all warm and cozy. It's warming me up nicely,"

Jungkook filmed himself trying the hot one and enjoyed the taste as well but not as much as the cold one.

"It's good. But I like the cold one, more," he said, still enjoying the hot drink as he took more sips.

"It's hard to choose. I like the hot version just a little bit more. Both are amazing. Well, butterbeer is worth the hype. I'm glad we finally tried it!"

The rest of the day was spent all over Harry Potter world, enjoying the rides and shopping in the stores. They even got to check out some other areas of Universal while taking lots of photos. After a fun filled day, the couple began to leave the park and Jungkook gave her his jacket to wear so she wouldn't be too cold.

"Enjoyed yourself?" He asked.

Enjoying the warmth of his jacket while holding his hand, she said, "One of the best birthdays ever! We gotta go back again, soon. Thanks for today. I had an amazing time,"

"I'm glad you did. Now, onto your next surprise," 

"Wait, there's more?"

-------

Making it back to the hotel, Jungkook guided Jennie back to her room, having her close her eyes as she walked in.

"And...open," he smiled after closing the door behind him.

Once she opened her eyes, she looked around in shock.

"No way!" she grinned and walked around. 

A large happy birthday banner was on display, tons of gifts were placed in the living room area and even cute balloons and decorations were scattered all around the room.

"Jungkook...this is incredible!"

"You deserve it," he grinned. "Jimin and Taehyung helped out,"

"They're the best. You're the best. Everyone is the best. This is too sweet, what?" 

"I'm glad you like everything. And...these are for you," he presented her with a vase full of a dozen red roses and she placed a hand over her chest, appreciative of the gesture.

"Aw...thank you!" she gave him a big kiss and set the vase down on the dining room table. "Wow...these are gorgeous! And they smell great!"

"Nike sent you something as well," he pointed to the living room couch as he made his way over.

"What!? A whole custom birthday box from Nike? What!? Oh, I am about to lose my mind!" she shouted happily and ran over to the large Orange box, sitting on the couch with him.

It held a card wishing her a happy birthday and that they were excited about her working with them. When she opened the box, there were tons of Nike goods in her size and custom made items just for her which made her heart soar.

"Wow...I sound like a broken record but...I...I feel so loved. And I'm so grateful to have you and everyone else in my life. Like really...thank you for always showing me how special I am," she said and kissed him again.

"Always. You mean a lot to me and you deserve all of this and more,"

"Kook...you mean a lot to me, too," 

After the two checked out everything from the Nike box, Jungkook spoke, "I made something for you,"

"Oh? What is it?" she looked on in anticipation.

"Close your eyes, first,"

"Okay," she closed her eyes with a smile, awaiting the surprise.

Getting up from the couch, Jungkook made his way to the fridge to grab the small red velvet cake that he had made for her. Despite the constant teasing from Jimin and Taehyung on whether he knew what he was doing, the cake turned out quite well and was decorated nicely with the icing. After grabbing a few paper plates, plastic forks, and a plastic knife, Jungkook set everything down on the coffee table in front of the couch as Jennie continued to wait patiently.

He placed a 1 candle and a 9 candle on the cutely decorated cake and presented it to her with a smile.

"Open," he softly said.

Opening her eyes, she looked at the cake in surprise, covering her mouth. She glanced up at him, back at the cake, and then back at him, uncovering her mouth to reveal a grin.

"What? You baked for me?"

"You bake for everyone. I wanted this birthday to be memorable so I decided to try to make you something,"

"Jungkook, today has been way more than memorable. This is so sweet, thank you. It smells so good. And it looks good, too,"

"I hope you like it. But before digging in..." he lit the candles and then began to sing Happy Birthday angelically which made her heart leap.

"Make a wish," he happily said. 

After a moment of thinking of a wish, she blew out the candles and they both cheered.

"Let's try the cake together," she requested.

Once Jungkook cut a big slice and put it on a paper plate to share, he placed it on the table. The two picked up a forkful and decided to feed each other. Jennie expected Jungkook's cake to taste delicious and she was correct, enjoying every bite as they continued to feed each other.

"How do you like it? I think it's pretty good," he said.

"You've outdone yourself, this tastes great!" she complimented.

"Better than you?" he teased in a hopeful voice.

"Alright now," she deadpanned before breaking out into giggles with him. 

After finishing the slice, Jungkook put the rest of the cake in the fridge.

"Ah, I'm so spoiled. Today has been magical! Like, look at this! I don't even know where to continue for the gifts," she said, looking at all the gifts scattered around from friends and family.

"Do you want to open your gifts now or see your last gift of the evening?"

"Last gift?" she looked at him curiously.

He smiled softly and nodded. 

The curiosity took over her. "Show me the last gift,"

"Follow me," he grabbed her hand and led her to the bedroom door.

Once he opened it, they walked in and saw that the room was decorated romantically. Cute electric candles lit up the dark room along with rose petals scattered around the floor and bed.

She gasped lightly as her heart fluttered. "Jungkook..."

After closing the door, he watched as she stood in front of him, looking around in awe. Slowly walking over to her from behind, he saw her turn around. No words needed to be said at the moment as they smiled at each other. They both knew they wanted this and felt secure in their feelings.

He gazed at her lovingly as he reached out to pull her into his arms, leaning down to capture her lips tenderly. She held onto him as they kissed and their stomachs leaped with joy and anticipation of what was about to happen. Pulling away she smiled and grabbed his hands, walking back until she was closer to the bed. Turning him around, she made him sit on the edge of the bed as the butterflies increased in her stomach. Straddling him, she wrapped her arms around his neck while feeling his hands rest on her hips.

'Wow...we're really about to do this,' she thought as she held his gaze.

"Nervous?" he asked softly.

"A little," she admitted.

"I'm nervous too but whatever we do it'll feel right," he responded while she ran a hand through his soft hair and cupped his cheek. "We have all night and I plan to take advantage of it. We'll go slow, okay?" 

"Okay," she smiled and explored his mouth again, tasting the red velvet cake from his lips.

Once she pulled away, he guided her soft hands to his firm chest and she slowly began to undo the buttons of his dress shirt. Unbuttoning the last button, she took it off him eagerly and got a good look at his toned torso, admiring the view which did not go unnoticed by him. She kissed him again, having her hands all over his body as the warmth of his skin radiated onto her. Jungkook smiled into the kiss, loving how her hands roamed, making him feel satisfied with his body. He had been getting slightly bigger in muscle and had been working out even more these days. 

She didn't know how much time had passed as she kept touching and kissing him but she loved how patient he was. He didn't rush her. He let her set the pace and let her do whatever she wanted.

As her soft, full lips trailed down to his chin and his neck, she began to slowly grind into him, making him groan softly which caused her stomach to leap at the pleasant sound. The grip on her hips tightened as he moved with her to create more friction. He sighed out her name when she nipped softly on his neck. Trailing kisses up his neck and capturing his lips again, she could feel him through his jeans as he pushed his hips into hers again, making her moan softly.

She felt his warm hands on her waist as he met her eyes, asking if it was OK to continue. Once she nodded, she felt her sweatshirt ride up and helped him take it off, tossing it on the floor. Jungkook swallowed hard, looking at her chest with desire as it was covered in a red bra.

"You can touch me, you know," she reminded with a smile and grabbed his hands, guiding them to her chest.

"I-I know...just...wow..." he said breathlessly.

He was in a trance and felt himself getting harder, enjoying the view up close like this. She sighed into his touch when he squeezed lightly and had his lips travel around her neck.

"You are so beautiful..." he murmured against her skin while his hands caressed her, making her squirm and whimper softly.

He was pleased to hear the sounds coming from her as she moved her neck to give him better access, feeling his sweet kisses all over. Suddenly, he easily stood up with her legs wrapped around his waist. Spinning around a little, she giggled, making him smile and capture her lips as she cupped his cheeks. Not breaking the kiss, he gently laid her down on the bed, crawling on top of her as she wrapped her arms around his neck.

Everything he was doing to her so far made her body feel warm all over as her heart pounded. The way he kissed her and continued to caress her body had her intoxicated by his touch. As they both sat up a little, Jungkook glanced at her to see if she was ready to continue and she nodded. Reaching out to the back of her bra, he attempted to unclasp it but began to struggle. The sight made Jen look amused as she thought it was cute how concentrated yet confused he was at trying to do such a simple task.

"Need help?" she teased.

"I got this," he said but continued to struggle.

As she watched him fumble with the bra, a giggle escaped her lips, making his ears twitch and glance back up at her.

"Are you laughing at me?" he chuckled.

"A little~. Here, let me help," she helped him unclasp it and take it off as she tossed it somewhere on the floor.

"Wow..." he breathed, drinking her in.

He gently laid her down and grabbed her right breast in his palm. Feeling him place kisses over her chest, she let out soft moans and writhed under his touch while he gave her left breast attention. While he sucked and swirled his tongue around her hard left nipple, her back arched as a wave of heat surged down between her legs. This felt too good as she continued to let out sounds of pleasure, enjoying what his mouth was doing. As he brushed her right nipple with his thumb, he continued to suck and nip on her left one, before moving over to give her right breast the same attention.

"Can I?" he breathed as his hands moved down to the button of her jeans.

"Yes," she breathed with want.

Unbuttoning her jeans and zipping down the fly, he helped her out of them, along with her red underwear, and tossed them off the bed. Moving back up, he kissed her again passionately. She then began to whimper against his mouth and squirmed when she felt one of his hands traveling down to her thigh. 

"Still sensitive here, I see," he murmured, pleased to have remembered one of her sensitive spots.

He kissed her hungrily as his hand traveled down to rub against her core, causing her to moan loudly into his mouth and hold onto him. 

"Jungkook..." she gasped.

Proud to feel her getting so wet for him and being so responsive to his touch, he kissed up her neck and whispered in her ear, "I'm right here,"

They've been here before. They have done this a handful of times since Prom Weekend and each time felt amazing as he knew how to make her feel good with his hands and tongue. 

As he kissed every inch of her body, being vocal about how beautiful she was and how beautiful her black skin was which continued to make her dizzy, Jungkook began to kiss down her body. While he kissed down her stomach, she let out a gasp and began breathing heavily once his lips kissed around her hips and inner thighs. Finally, he was face to face with her entrance. He was pleased to see how wet she had become and it was all for him as she was anticipating what he would do next.

His mouth got to work, kissing her thighs and landing right to her core as her heavy pants were heard throughout the bedroom, which was music to his ears. Jungkook felt her grip fistfuls of his silky hair as he swirled his tongue around her folds, starting at a slow pace since he wanted to take his time to enjoy her. His tongue felt warm and soft against her as he licked his way up to her clit.

"Ah, Jungkook!" she cried out as her hips jolted at the sudden sensation.

As he continued, picking up the pace to lick and suck her clit, he felt her remove her hands from his hair and try to move away because the pleasure was beginning to make her feel like she wouldn't be able to handle it. However, Jungkook was having none of it and pulled her back to his mouth and kept her firmly in place, digging right back in.

"I-I can't—fuck!" she moaned, squeezing her eyes shut as she threw her head back into the soft mattress. 

She wasn't going to be able to take much more of this as she felt vibrations against her from his chuckle, sending shivers up her spine. Meanwhile, Jungkook looked up with lustful eyes, enjoying the view of her looking disheveled with her mouth open.

"Yes, you can," he encouraged. "You're taking it so well like you always do,"

He felt a sense of pride. No one else was able to make her feel the way he made her feel. And he enjoyed the fact that he caused this reaction from her and only him. He continued to devour her, paying attention to her cries of pleasure. Instantly after that, her entire body tensed up as she shuddered and cried out his name. Smiling to himself, he kept his head buried between her thighs as his mouth was slick with saliva and her juices. Pulling away, with his mouth glistening, he licked his lips.

"You all right?" he asked with a soft smirk, feeling a bit smug that he left her in shambles.

As she steadied her breathing, she finally was able to speak, "Hm-hm...it's like...every time you do this you get better,"

He smiled at her praise. "The motivation is you,"

She smiled at his reply. They truly loved each other. And now they were expressing it on a whole new level. She felt so safe with him and felt amazing so far. Deep in her thoughts, her eyes began to roam down to his physique, admiring the view. Those arms...those thighs...everything. He looked beautiful and she felt so lucky to call him hers. 

"Normally, I'm the one caught in a trance. Like what you see?" he raised a brow in a teasing manner, making her look back up at his doe eyes.

She giggled. "Caught red-handed,"

Reaching out for him, she pulled him to hover over her as she crashed her lips against his.

"Are you okay to continue or do you need a break?" he murmured against her lips.

"I can continue," she replied, helping him take his jeans off.

As he tossed the jeans off the bed, Jennie noticed the bulge in his underwear and reached out, wanting to pleasure him but he gently stopped her. 

"I want to focus on you, tonight," he said softly. "Another time, okay? Let me take care of you. I've been dreaming about this moment for a long time...tell me what you want and I'll give it to you. I'll give you anything and everything, Jennie..."

Her heart pounded at his words as she cupped his left cheek, thumb caressing the little scar on his cheek. 

"Jungkook, please...I need you," she begged, making his dick throb while he sweetly kissed her body again. 

It took every ounce of strength from him to not let her wish be granted just yet. He still wanted to make sure she was well prepared for him.

"I know...I know...just a little longer," he murmured against her skin. "I love you like this...I love your beautiful skin...your lips...your shoulders...your arms...your hands..." 

As he called out each body part, he moved to kiss them as he continued to take his time with the foreplay which began to drive her crazy with her need for him increasing tenfold. He kissed every inch of her body once again and made mental notes of all her sweet spots. Even though he also had lube to assist, he meant what he said when he wanted to take his time and make her feel beautiful as he whispered sweet nothings to her.

When he finally felt like she was ready, he slipped out of his boxers and she finally got a look at all of him as she laid on her back. From his broad shoulders, strong arms, and thick thighs, to his hard length slick from anticipation, she loved everything about him as she bit her bottom lip softly, enjoying the view. He was so captivatingly handsome and no longer the little boy she met at Big Hit when they were younger. He was a man whom she fell in love with and is proud to call hers. A man who has made her feel desired and gorgeous all night. A man who she's giving herself to.

A man she loves deeply.

Watching him put a condom on along with putting a generous amount of lube, her stomach flipped with anticipation. Lining himself up at her entrance, he met her gaze and they both smiled.

"You ready?" he breathed.

"Yes. I love you," 

"I love you, too," he immediately replied.

He hovered over her and gave her a deep, passionate kiss as he pushed his tip in slowly and entered her. As she felt him push all the way in, she moaned into his mouth and held onto him tightly. The stretch felt good and it didn't hurt as much as she anticipated. Honestly, the way he prepared her was a great thing as she felt more pleasure all around.

"Fuck...you feel amazing," he groaned.

He felt like he was in heaven at how good she felt around him while his head was on the crook of her neck. He kept himself still for a moment to allow them both to adjust to this new feeling as he breathed heavily with her. It felt like a big stretch and she felt full. But damn did he feel good and he didn't even move yet.

"Are you ok?" he whispered.

"Hm hm," she breathed.

"Let me know when to move. I'll try not to cum too quick...you feel so good," he sounded a bit strained as he tried to control himself. 

They remained still for a while and Jungkook lifted his head to take a good look at her with love in his eyes. This was another sight he'd never get tired of and wanted to experience over and over again with her under him like this. 

She reached out and cupped his cheek. "You can move,"

"Okay. I'll go slow,"

Their bodies pressed together heatedly with Jungkook slowly thrusting into her with ease as he grunted along with her gasps and whimpers. It felt so good. Better than she ever imagined. 

So this was how it felt to be intimate with someone you love. She felt euphoric.

He kept the pace slow, careful not to hurt her, and found a sensual rhythm after a few thrusts. Picking up his head, he watched her with adoration while maintaining eye contact with her.

"I love you so much...you feel so good. Better than I ever imagined..." he moaned.

He noticed she was trying not to be loud and was keeping a lot of sounds to herself. But he wanted to encourage her to break out of that and it was all for his ears only. He kissed her sloppily and pressed his body against hers again with his head on the crook of her neck.

Grunting in her ear, he spoke, "It's okay, Jennie. Let it out. It's just us. I want to hear you,"

He began to pick up the pace a little, causing her to cry out and lightly scratch his back. She held onto him tight as her panting and moans increased in volume. When he heard her beginning to moan out his name, he smiled to himself.

"That's it...good girl," he praised with a huff. 

She involuntarily clenched around him, causing him to moan. That nickname was going to be dangerous in the future she could already tell from the way she reacted positively every time he called her that. Because of her sudden reaction to it, his confidence continued to boost.

Grabbing her hands, he pinned them to the bed on each side of her head and intertwined his fingers with hers as he continued to thrust into her.

Feeling her release, Jennie cried out his name with her body stuttering. As she rode out her high, Jungkook soon followed as he groaned out her name. His body shook violently as he filled up the condom and collapsed on top of her, panting heavily.

He rolled off of her, removed the condom, and placed it in the wastebasket next to the bed. Immediately he pulled her into his arms and held her as they came down from their high.

"Wow..." he sighed deeply with a big smile.

She giggled and looked up at him.

"Wow..." she replied breathlessly.

Wow...they just took the next step in their relationship and it was something they were always going to remember. Jennie had a dull ache between her thighs but she felt amazing. She felt treasured and she felt important. He took his time with her and made her feel beautiful. They both were sweaty from their physical activities and tangled in the sheets as they smooched again, soaking in the euphoria. 

"Are you all right?" Jungkook asked in a gentle voice with a smile as she looked at him.

He admired the afterglow on her face as he thought she was the most beautiful person he ever laid eyes on.

She cupped the side of his face and beamed. "I feel amazing. Thank you."

"I'm glad you do. Did I do ok?" he hoped as she moved strands of hair sticking on his forehead.

"Of course. It was everything I wanted and more,"

"Good. I'm glad. Does anything hurt?"

"Not really. You prepared me, well. And the lube was a bonus, too. A few friends of mine told me how it hurt them for their first time so I was trying to mentally prepare for the pain but...with you, I was in bliss,"

He smiled at that as his heart pounded. "I was in bliss with you, too,"

Jennie truly was in a state of utter bliss, right now. She felt so good and relaxed. Jungkook had been so loving and attentive for their first time.

"Honestly, I love it when you praise me, in bed. And I really love the things you do to me...how you make me feel. Physically and emotionally,"

She could sense his confidence boosting even more from her compliment as a big grin came across his face. 

"That makes me very happy. So, I can keep calling you my good girl in bed?"

She giggled. "Yes. It makes me feel good and makes me feel like I'm doing a good job,"

"You're always doing a good job. You have nothing to worry about when it comes to us. I like it when you're vocal and the way you hold onto me. Don't be timid about it, okay?"

"Okay, I'll do my best,"

"We need to work on you not running from me when I'm trying to give you head," he teased.

"I...listen...it's..." she couldn't find the right words as he laughed, making her chuckle. "You do it so right, I can get overwhelmed with the pleasure. I didn't think I was going to be able to handle it,"

"You handled yourself, well. And you'll continue to. Also, I think you scratched my back a little,"

"Oh gosh, I'm sorry. I hope it's not too bad,"

"I liked the feeling, it's okay. It did have me thinking about the future. If I'm able to get this reaction out of you now then...what about the other things I want to try with you because there are a lot of things I want to try...a lot,"

She felt her stomach flip at the way his gaze intensified when he said that. "Me too. I kind of...want to see how it is in front of a mirror, one day,"

"Thinking ahead, too, huh?" he smirked softly at the thought. "I'm curious, as well,"

She decided to lay on her back, looking at the ceiling while he chose to lay on his side and propped his head in his hand as he watched her.

"Wow...I remember when I first saw you..." she said with a smile as he listened attentively. "I walked past you a few times when I was still training. You didn't notice me but I'd see you from time to time at Big Hit. You were so focused on your training. And it was always a treat to catch a glimpse of your smile. I always loved seeing you smile. I was closer with Tae at the time since he was the only BTS member I knew but he'd talk about you and the rest of the members and I was just praying...just hoping that I'd get chosen as Miss Bangtan when I auditioned,"

"And here we are," he spoke up.

Turning her head to him, she chuckled. "And here we are. Over the years...being your best friend and learning and growing up with you have been some of the best moments of my life. And being here in this moment with you...being your girlfriend...is when I'm the happiest,"

Jungkook's eyes softened as he listened to her. "And I'm the happiest with you. Always. You taught me a lot of things and you're still teaching me. You taught me how to love. And how to express myself,"

She smiled at that. "I'm glad. Thank you. I'm happy you made me wait. This was perfect. Wow..."

Jungkook watched her with heart eyes as she rambled. He couldn't help himself and blurted his thoughts out loud, "You're so beautiful,"

Hearing him say that caused her to stop talking, feeling flushed at the sudden compliment. She giggled as he looked at her lovingly. Hiding her face in his chest made him chuckle as his heart leaped.

"I'm serious, Jennie. I'm happy. I'm happy to be here with you in this moment,"

Looking up at him, she responded, "Keep it up and you're gonna make me fall in love with you harder,"

He grinned and leaned down to kiss her, wrapping an arm around her. Jennie was already down bad. She couldn't get enough of him and didn't want this to end. She wanted to stay here forever if she could.

As they cuddled and rested in bed in a comfortable silence, Jennie spoke, "What are you thinking about, Jungkook?"

"What you said earlier. I remember my first thoughts when I first laid eyes on you at Big Hit," he brought up as his fingers began to trace over her curves. "I caught a few glimpses of you during the trainee days. Before we officially met when you were declared Miss Bangtan. I always thought you were so pretty. Me and my shyness prevented me from trying to approach you to say hi but whenever I saw you train, I'd stop for a moment to watch you work. You worked so hard and there was a unique fire in you that made you stand out from the other girls. And I had hoped you'd be the one to become Miss Bangtan,"

"And here we are,"

He chuckled at her response since he had said that earlier. "Here we are. I was so happy. And then I got to know you and asked you to be my Golden Best Friend. We confirmed it with friendship rings and did everything together. And I couldn't help but start to fall in love with you and that scared me because I didn't want to ruin our friendship. But as we got older and I finally had that confidence to tell you how I felt...it became one of the best decisions I have ever made in my life. I'm really happy that you're mine,"

"Jungkook..." she cupped his face and smiled. "I'm really happy that you're mine, too. We'll be together for a year in a few months. Time flew, huh?"

"Yeah, it did. Wow...a year already?"

"Seems like just yesterday I told you I loved you, too in your room. And since then, every day has been an adventure,"

"A fun one at that. I just want to be the best boyfriend, ever. Your first and last,"

"You will be my first, last, and always," she said as he played with her hand and intertwined his fingers with hers.

"Are you ready for our reveal?" he asked, since later this year they'll be revealing their relationship to the public.

"Yeah. I am. I'm going to miss this. Miss the privacy and everyone not knowing anything but I know Dispatch knows we're dating. But at least we can beat them to it and say our truth. I'm mentally prepared for it. I know you'll be by my side through it all. I have nothing to worry about when I'm with you,"

"I'm happy you know that. We'll be fine. Just like what I told you when I confessed. I meant every word. No one is going to take you away from me so easily. I'll stand next to you through it all,"

Time passed as they continued to be in each other's arms to talk. Angelina was right, pillow talk was definitely the best.

While Jungkook listened to her talk, he thought about how connected he felt with her after everything. He was never going to let her go. Not after all this. Jennie noticed his expression change which caused her to stop talking. The way he stared deeply into her eyes with deep longing made her stomach flip.

"A-are you okay?" she asked.

"Yeah...I just can't get enough of you," he leaned down to start kissing her lips again, slowly turning them over as he hovered over her.

She gasped and held onto him when she felt him grind into her.

"A-again?" she asked keenly, melting into his touch as his hands roamed over her body.

"Again. I'm not done," he responded as she giggled. 

Jennie was happy that they were on the same page with this. She wanted to ask to go again and wondered how to bring it up. His dick felt nice and introduced her to a whole world of pleasure and she couldn't wait to try different positions. Also, who knows when they will have alone time like this, again? Especially for the whole day. So they should take advantage of this moment.

Jungkook wasn't expecting himself to be hard again so suddenly but this was Jennie who he had in his arms. Who he kissed over and over again and made love to. Who he had longed for since he could remember. He wanted to do everything with her and his desires began to take over.

"Are you still flexible?" he suddenly asked.

Flexible? Just what did he have in mind? The question weighed in her mind as she thought of how she should answer.

Feeling playful, she replied in a teasing manner, as her hand went down to his hard length, "Hm...why don't you find out?" 

Groaning from her touch, Jungkook's ears perked up when she asked that enticing question.

Was that...a challenge?

"Challenge accepted," he said huskily in her ear, making her shiver.

It didn't take long for them both to be ready for the next round as he went to grab another condom to put on. On his knees, he heard her let out a surprised yelp when he quickly grabbed her ankles and swiftly pulled her to him as his pupils dilated.

"I always wanted to do this to you," he grabbed her legs and placed them over his shoulders.

He kissed her right ankle softly and looked down at her while placing a warm and firm grip on her hips. She felt even more vulnerable and excited to be in this new position as she tried to prepare for what was about to happen.

"Just tell me if it's too much or if this hurts, okay? I'll go slow, first," he reassured.

Once she confirmed that she would do as she was told, Jennie cried out when he pushed in and began to move at a slow pace to get her used to the new position. Now this position felt even deeper and had her louder as she gripped the sheets and let out a series of curses from how good it felt. Pants left Jungkook's lips as he kept his eyes locked on her while Jennie's eyes were closed, overwhelmed with pleasure.

"Look at me," he demanded.

Managing to open them to meet his ardent gaze, short, ragged gasps left her.

"W-wait—Oh my God!" she cried when he began to pick up the pace, leaning forward, bringing her knees to her chest as he placed his palms on the mattress, on either side of her head.

She tried to grab onto anything she could. The sheets, his torso, his hair, anything as she kept her eyes on him, watching his face contort in pleasure. His eyes were as dangerous as that sultry stare he kept on her and he was using all of it to his advantage to make her tremble underneath him. When she told him to find out if she was still flexible, she wasn't expecting him to bend her this early on as his hips snapped faster.

Her release hit her in waves as she screamed with her body shaking. With one last powerful thrust, his body twitched and he released into the condom. Both were shaking and breathing heavily as they stayed in the position with him looking down, enthralled by her.

"Shit...Where did you learn that!?" she exclaimed, catching her breath, feeling the after effects of her high.

He chuckled and leaned down to lock lips with hers as his tongue brushed against hers. Pulling away, he smiled. "Ah...I hope you won't get mad but I've been asking Namjoon Hyung for some advice,"

"Me? Mad? After what you just did to me, are you crazy? I need to thank him,"

He laughed as she giggled.

Jungkook felt like Namjoon was the best to have serious discussions on topics regarding taking that next step in the relationship. He loved all his hyungs and trusted them. And with Namjoon, he felt like he could confide in him the best about being an attentive boyfriend in the bedroom. And overall, the best to go to for any advice. He was a great leader and a great friend.

"I am not complaining whatsoever...oh my God..." she sighed deeply. "That was amazing,"

As they continued to catch their breath, Jungkook hadn't pulled out yet.

"Just let me...let me stay inside you just a little longer. You feel too good," he told her as she enjoyed the sensation.

He relished the feeling of being inside her. The warmth of her around him. He was happy to be vulnerable with her and be able to express himself like this. After a while, he slowly pulled out of her to remove the condom and throw it in the trash.

"Stay right there, I'll be back," he said and got out of bed.

Turning on her side to watch him, she spoke, "Nice butt,"

He chuckled and raised an eyebrow suggestively at her before leaving the room. Moments later, he came back with two bottles of water and a wet washcloth. Handing her a bottle while setting the other on the nightstand, he got back in bed.

"Thank you," she smiled and opened it to gulp some water. 

The cool drink quenched her dry throat and she was grateful. Especially due to the amount of yelling and screaming she had been doing because of him.

"Let me clean you up a bit," he said and used the washcloth to gently wipe her down. 

They both were sweaty and spent from their activities as sleep was heavy on their minds. After he wiped her down nicely, he turned off all the electric candles in the room and got under the covers with her. Pulling her into his arms, she laid on his chest with her chest flushed against his as he put the covers over them. 

"You all right?" he asked, sleepily.

"Hm-hm...I love you..." she murmured sleepily as she snuggled into his chest.

"I love you, too," he kissed the top of her head and closed his eyes.

----------

In the morning, the bedroom was brightened with the sun peeking out. Still under the sheets and lying on her own side of the comfortable bed instead of on top of Jungkook, Jennie began to stir in her slumber.

Opening her eyes, she stretched and laid on her back. Her body felt a little sore from last night's physical activities and her face flushed, remembering what had happened. A smile tugged on her mouth as she thought about how good Jungkook made her feel. Was this what it was like to be with someone you truly love? She felt like she was on a high. Warm and fuzzy feelings filled her heart as she was elated.

Turning around, she was greeted by the beautiful view of a naked Jungkook still sleeping. His hair was messy and the bed sheet was covering his lower body, showing off his toned chest and abs. His face exuded calmness as she watched him with a smile and looked at him with a deeper love. After last night, their love for each other amplified and they were even more affirmed in their feelings.

She kissed his nose and turned her back to him to grab her phone off the nightstand. She focused on answering birthday messages from yesterday and thanked friends, family, and fans for all the love. 

Feeling the bed move, she set her phone down on the mattress and felt Jungkook wrap an arm around her, pulling her to his firm chest.

"Mm...good morning," he greeted in her ear, making her shiver.

Oh...his morning voice was a whole new level of sexy. His voice was rough and deeper and she even heard a bit of his Busan Satoori accent. 

Before she could speak, he gently moved her onto her stomach and began to place soft, sensual kisses on her shoulder and down her back, making her breath hitch. His lips traveled down her spine as she trembled and he found himself going lower.

"Ah! Stop!" she laughed and squirmed when he went to gently bite her left ass cheek, feeling playful this morning.

She felt him chuckle against her body as he kissed back up her spine with his length hardened. Pulling her back against his chest, as they began to lay on their sides, she looked back and crashed her lips against his deeply.

The both of them were all over each other, unable to get enough as they kissed and touched each other like they did the night before. Both ready for round 3, Jungkook slipped on another condom as they laid on their sides, spooning. Sliding in smoothly, she gasped as he held her close, with her leg over his, thrusting in and out at a luscious pace while she pushed back with each thrust. 

They can get used to this. Being able to love each other this much without any interruptions. Their moans and heavy breathing filled the room as they made love once again. After they came down from their sweet release, with Jungkook pulling out and throwing the condom away, Jennie snuggled into his arms.

"Good morning. Can't keep your hands off me, huh?" she giggled after kissing him tenderly.

"Not after last night. And I just wanted to make sure I wasn't dreaming that last night happened. I'm happy this is real. How are you feeling?"

"Me too. I feel good. Just a little sore but I'm fine,"

"Did I do too much?"

"No, you're fine, Kook. You made me feel special," she answered while he kissed her temple.

They stayed in bed for another hour, enjoying each other's company, and proceeded to get ready for the day. Jennie put her hair in a high bun and planned her outfit for the day, setting it out on the dresser of the bedroom. Putting on her shower playlist to play on a small speaker in the bathroom, the two began to shower together. This was a whole new level of intimacy as they smiled at each other and reminisced on last night.

They showered but before they could turn off the water, the two found themselves all over each other once again. This time it was Jennie who had initiated it, pulling him to her wet body as the warm water rushed down Jungkook's back. Her heavy breathing and moans mixed with the running water as she writhed under his touch.

"You want to do this in the shower?" he grunted against her ear as her hands released his length.

"Wait...condoms. We don't have any," 

"We do. I put one condom and a specific type of lube that'll work in the shower for it. Right here," he pointed to one of the shelves of the shower.

As he said, there was a packaged condom and lube to assist with the shower. She was surprised. He really thought of everything.

"Wow, you really had this all planned out for me, huh?" 

"Just in case," he grinned sheepishly. "There are a lot of places I imagined us in...this is one of them. So, we could try it here. See if we like it, if you're up for it. I don't want to overdo it or anything if you're tired,"

"Overdo it? Nah, come here. I'm never going to get enough of you. I can handle another round," she pulled him back, backing up against the cold tile which made her shiver slightly.

He smirked. "Your wish is my command. I'm never going to get enough of you, either,"

As they kissed repeatedly, the shower water ran down his back while they were all over each other. They didn't know how much time had passed as they explored their bodies in this new environment for lovemaking but all that was on their minds was each other. After grabbing the condom to put it on himself, he used a generous amount of lube.

"Hold onto me," he instructed after lifting her to hold her securely in his arms while she was pressed against the shower wall.

He slid right in, slow and sensual as they both gasped at the feeling. The two became lost in each other once again as Jungkook began to move at an agonizingly slow pace, to try to tease her. It began to work as she whined and held onto him tighter.

"Faster..." she murmured in his ear while his face was buried in the crook of her neck.

He heard her and chuckled as she felt the vibration against her wet body. He knew what she wanted but wanted to hear her say it louder.

"Speak up, Jennie. What do you want?"

Oh, this little shit...How could he have the strength to tease her like this? This wasn't fair.

Unable to handle the slow pace, she finally relented as she let out another curse and spoke up as requested as she begged, "Please...go faster!"

Giving her what she wanted, he immediately picked up the pace, making her cry out and hold onto him tighter. Moving his head he smooched her sloppily as she moaned and whimpered against his mouth. There was no way she was going to be able to survive this with the way he snapped his hips against hers. God...her head was spinning with the way he had her yelling out for him. She knew for a fact her legs were going to feel like jelly after this with the way he was making her feel. He felt so good and felt better every time they were intimate. 

She moaned his name loudly and clenched around him as she had her release. His hips snapped into her faster with his movements getting sloppier, groaning out her name as he followed her, both riding out their high together.

Still catching their breaths, they looked at each other with satisfied smiles and kissed again as he remained inside her, enjoying the feeling. After their shower, Jennie's legs felt weak and she almost fell until he caught her.

"Easy," he soothed. "You all right?"

"I am but my legs feel like jelly," she admitted.

"Yeah...I overdid it," he chuckled.

"And it was so worth it," she responded tiredly with a chuckle.

Turning off the shower, and grabbing a towel, he wrapped it around her body and carried her bridal style out of the shower. Gently laying her on her bed, he went back to the bathroom to dry off and wrap a towel around himself, walking back in the bedroom.

"I'll take care of you. Relax. I'm going to lotion you up and help put on your outfit. Then you'll rest up, all right?"

"Mm-hm," she responded tiredly again.

Her body was spent.

To pamper her like this even though her birthday was over was sweet. He lotioned her body and even massaged her while he did it to help with the soreness. Especially for her legs. He then helped her put on her sports bra, sweatpants, and a hoodie. After she was squared away, she immediately fell asleep as he chuckled at the cute sight. Readjusting her on the bed, he gently placed a pillow under her and placed the covers over her.

Kissing her cheek, he watched her sleep, feeling satisfied. He made love to her how many times, now? Made her say his name with ecstasy in her voice, how many times? She was his and he was hers. They were 100% locked in.

After she was taken care of, he grabbed his bag to put on his new outfit for the day, consisting of a similar outfit of a hoodie and sweatpants. He then gathered their scattered clothes from last night and straightened up the bedroom.

Gently closing the bedroom door, he let her sleep. While he waited for her to wake up, he brought his Wii U and played it in the living room. After an hour passed his phone buzzed on the coffee table and he saw Namjoon calling.

"Morning, hyung," Jungkook greeted happily.

"Good morning. Are you two getting ready for breakfast?" he asked.

Breakfast?? Jungkook had forgotten that the group planned to go out to eat for breakfast. But he planned to make Jennie breakfast.

Jungkook rubbed the back of his neck as he got up to check on Jennie still sleeping and went back to the couch. "You mind if we both do a rain check? We'll be ready for dinner, later. She's still sleeping and I plan to make her breakfast in her room,"

Namjoon laughed at his response, having an understanding of what was up while Jungkook began to blush.

"Ah...Hyung, can you keep this between us?"

"Of course. I'm happy you two are happy and affirming your love for each other,"

"Thank you,"

"Is that Jungkook? Are they getting ready?" Jin asked in the background.

"It's him. They're going to eat breakfast together. They won't be joining us," Namjoon informed.

"What!? I wanted to see Jennie and spend more time with her after he hogged her all day,"

"We ate breakfast with her yesterday,"

"And I'd like to spend more time with my daughter, thank you,"

"Our daughter,"

Jungkook laughed at their banter and ignored Jin's complaining as he hung up the phone. He proceeded to make Jennie a Japanese breakfast. He planned out making her breakfast a few days before her birthday and went grocery shopping in advance. Once he finished making everything for them both, he set the dishes up on the coffee table while the TV was showing the news and how the weather was going to be today. 

Heading into her room to see her awake and scrolling her phone, he smiled. 

"Hey," he greeted softly.

Her face lit up when she turned to see him. "Hi...something smells good," 

She sat up and stretched, feeling refreshed as the soreness had felt more dull now and her legs didn't feel as weak as before. 

"Call it brunch. It's waiting for us," he proudly announced. 

"Brunch with you? How cute. What time is it?"

"It's past 1 now,"

"There is no way," she looked at the clock on her phone.

She was so fixated on continuing to reply to birthday messages and seeing the nice tweets from ARMY that she failed to acknowledge the time. It was truly past 1 pm.

"Jungkook!? Why didn't you wake me earlier? We were going to hang with Jimin and Tae, I just remembered,"

"Trust me, you needed the rest after what I did to you these past 24 hours," he reminded, causing her face to flush. "And it's a good thing we don't have a schedule today and you get to rest. So, it all worked out," 

"Okay, you got me there," she chuckled with him.

Reaching out to gently grab her, he easily lifted her in his arms to carry her to the living room and sat her down on the couch where their food was waiting for them.

"I already let them know we'll hang out with them, later. They're still here at the hotel. We'll meet them when ready," 

"Okay, cool. Wow, this looks delicious. Spoiling me, still?"

"Always. Let's eat,"

She took a bite of her steamed rice and praised him for his cooking as he felt great about himself. He loved hearing her praise him and thank him for the little things. Jennie was always vocal about the things he did for her and he appreciated that. 

As they ate, Jennie found a channel that showed a familiar anime that she remembered Taehyung mentioning. The two chatted about what they planned to do for the rest of the day and as they ate with Jungkook focused on the TV, she observed him in contentment.

So valued...so secure...she wanted this relationship to last forever. She truly believed she found the one. A walking green flag, he is. Someone so open and patient in loving her. Someone who truly sees her and is not afraid to love her, even in public. 

"What?" he grinned, sensing her looking at his face as he got lost in her eyes. 

"I love you, Jungkook," she said with a smile.

His bunny smile got wider as he leaned over to kiss her deeply. "I love you, too,"

After eating breakfast together, Jennie continued to open up her gifts and made sure to send texts and tweets to shout out everyone who had gifted her something. The two lovers continued to get ready for the day and made sure to cover up any marks from their physical activities since last night with concealer. 

Making sure she had everything, she left her room with Jungkook and placed a white cap on her head. "Okay! Let's meet up with Jimin and Taehyung,"

"Onward!" Jungkook smacked her butt and walked beside her as she giggled.

----------

The couple met up with the other half of the Maknae line so they could do some sightseeing for the day. Meeting them outside, the four of them began walking. Jimin and Taehyung began to notice Jennie and Jungkook acting closer than before and peeped at how Jungkook seemed to act clingier in a way. And there was a sudden glow about Jennie that could not be ignored as she smiled happily. Curiosity popped up between the two as they wondered what happened.

"Ennie! So, how was your birthday? It's been all day and now we see you? Are you all right?" Taehyung asked with a grin.

"Yeah! It was so much fun! We went to Universal and we got to see Harry Potter World! Butterbeer is SO good! And yeah, I'm fine. I was catching up on sleep. I was up all night," 

A low chuckle escaped Jungkook's lips as he thought about the context of her statement and smirked to himself. All the memories of her under him came back as he thought about how crazy they were about each other. Catching the reaction, Jennie locked eyes with her lover and felt her face warm up as she chuckled softly. 

Jimin and Taehyung glanced at each other as they watched closely at the couple's body language and reactions to her statement.

"Jeon Jungkook...Jennifer Walker." Jimin called them out.

"Yeah? What is it?" she asked, reluctantly turning away from Jungkook to look at him.

"What, hyung?" Jungkook asked as his lingering gaze on her stayed. After a moment, he finally turned to Jimin to see what he wanted.

Jimin narrowed his eyes, observing them suspiciously while the couple raised an eyebrow.

"Mm-hm." Jimin nodded to himself and glanced at Taehyung.

"Mm-hm?" Taehyung glanced back and Jimin nodded in response. 

"Mm-hm..." they both said and gave each other knowing looks, chuckling to themselves.

"So, Jennie, was Jungkook golden in lovemaking, too?" Jimin teased with a grin.

Jungkook let out a cough, looking shooked while Jennie widened her eyes and turned away.

"He was! Oh my God! You two finally did it!? It took you both long enough! And why didn't you tell us this, earlier!? Our ship has sailed to NEW heights!" Taehyung cheered.

"Why would we do that!?" Jungkook exclaimed.

Jennie groaned. "This isn't something the whole world should know."

"But we're the Maknae Line! We tell each other everything!" Jimin whined.

"Oh my God..." Jennie sighed.

"Oh my gosh, do your sisters know that their baby sister is-"

"NO!" she cut Jimin off.

"Does Jin know!? His reaction will be priceless!" Taehyung laughed.

"NO! And we'd like to keep it that way!" Jungkook exclaimed.

"So, this is why she was walking a little funny," Jimin laughed loudly while Taehyung giggled.

Jennie pushed her cap down to hide her embarrassment as she looked down. Her face was on fire from their constant teasing while Jungkook went to hit them both.

"Hyung!" Jungkook shouted, face getting pink.

"What? We think it's adorable! If you need any alone time, we can help!"

"Yeah! It's nice to see our Golden Couple so close as of late," Taehyung added with a boxy smile.

"So, Jennie, was Jungkookie manly?" Jimin teased, raising his eyebrows.

"Chill!" Jennie whined, covering her face.

"Let's go!" Jungkook grabbed her hand and walked away while the 95 Liners continued to laugh out loud and ran after them.

--------

Later in the evening, all of Bangtan went out to eat in a private area for dinner to catch up. Jennie sat in between Jungkook and Hobi as they all ate their food happily. Jen settled for ramen and devoured the noodles with delight.

"Well, it's finally good to see you, Jennie. Where have you been all day? We tried to get a hold of you for breakfast but Jungkook said you were still sleeping," Jin brought up. 

"We ate breakfast together," she answered with a smile.

"He hogged you all day yesterday and even all morning. It's good to see you, now," Yoongi added.

"Haha, it's good to see you guys, too! I just had a long night and slept in. But my birthday was fun!" she replied, smiling brightly.

"What did you do? I saw your tweets at Universal! I want to go next time,"

"We all gotta make a trip there, it was a blast! The rides were lit," she enthused as she recapped her time with Jungkook at Universal.

"Butterbeer, huh? I'm curious," Hobi added.

Dinner was filled with good vibes and silliness like always as everyone laughed at whatever jokes were said or silly acts were performed. Amused at Hobi and Taehyung's silliness, Jennie and Jungkook began clapping their hands while laughing, throwing their heads back.

Jimin and Taehyung glanced at each other and grinned. Now they were doing the same mannerisms as each other? This was too cute.

"You two laugh the same!" Taehyung giggled.

"Yeah! And you moved the same!" Jin pointed out.

"Lately it's like you two are starting to act the same, sometimes," Hobi added.

"We are?" the couple asked in unison which caused the guys to chuckle at their point being made.

"Usually Jungkook claps and laughs. Jen, it seems like you picked up on his habit. It's cute," Yoongi observed.

"Really? I didn't even notice," she giggled, glancing at Jungkook with a smile.

After eating, Jennie decided to do some last minute grocery shopping because she wanted to try to make a Japanese cake after coming across so many bakeries in Japan. She wanted to learn more about baking different types of sweets and decided to try to make herself a Japanese Strawberry Shortcake. She had tried one before and loved it and wanted to create her own version.

Wanting to keep her company, the Hyung Line decided to join her while the Maknae Line went to hang out somewhere else. Finding a grocery store that didn't have that many people, they began to shop while wearing their masks.

"What do you plan to make?" Jin asked while Hobi pushed Jen's shopping cart for her.

"Oh, so you know the Japanese strawberry shortcake? I've been researching how people make it and their techniques. I want to try to create my own," she answered happily.

"You sharing?" Namjoon immediately asked.

"I want a slice," Yoongi spoke up.

"Me too~!" Hobi cheered.

"If there is anyone who deserves a slice, it's me! You are sharing, right, Jennie?" Jin asked, hopeful. 

She giggled at their enthusiasm. "Yes, I'm sharing. I'll let you guys know when I finish making it,"

The boys cheered at that, yelling happily as she laughed.

"Do you have the list of ingredients?" Yoongi asked.

"Mm hm. I have it on my phone," she answered while checking out the fruit section.

While they shopped, Yoongi began to research the Japanese Strawberry Shortcake on his phone and wandered off to grab recommended ingredients. Finding his group after a few minutes, he placed the ingredients in the cart.

"What's this?" she asked him.

"I read that these specific brands are the best for making the cake. Try it out, see if it'll enhance it," 

"Aw, thanks, Yoongi! I'll try it out,"

Yoongi smiled under his mask, happy that she accepted his suggestion. 

As they were finishing up their shopping with the boys carrying the bags for her, they began walking back to their hotel. But then, Jen's phone crashed onto the ground, being protected by her phone case after it slipped out her hands.

"Ahhhhhh~! Her phone dropped!" Hobi yelled while the guys began freaking out with him which startled her.

"Miss Bangtan dropped her phone! Holy shit!" Yoongi dramatically yelled.

"She dropped her phone! Her phone is down!" Jin cried.

"Her phone is on the ground!" Namjoon shouted as he and the rest of the boys gathered around the phone, looking down at it.

Jennie watched in amusement as they pretended to be a referee for a boxing match and began counting like it was a knockout.

"1!"

"2!"

"3!"

"4!"

"You guys are so dramatic! What the hell?" she laughed as she bent down to pick up the phone while they laughed with her. 

Once making it back to the hotel, she stayed in her room alone to work on her cake while Jungkook was still out. Looking back at the recipe and videos to make sure she followed the directions, she felt confident in having the cake turn out well. She worked hard as she followed every tip and direction, making the cake with love and putting her spin on it.

After a while, she heard a series of knocks on her door and Jen washed her hands and opened it to let Jungkook in.

"Hey! Welcome back," she gave him a sweet kiss after shutting the door.

"Hey, I missed you. How was shopping?"

"It was fun. I just finished the cake. You want to be my taste tester?"

"Hell yeah! How did it go baking it?" he asked as they walked over to the kitchen to see the delicious shortcake. 

It looked mouthwatering. The soft, fluffy sponge cake sat on a platter, decorated nicely with strawberries and whipped cream.

"I think it went all right. I didn't have any trouble when making it. I had some good references. I want to start trying new recipes to expand my baking skills,"

"So, I get to be your taste tester before you give it to the guys?" he asked happily.

She giggled. "Yes. They're eager to try it but I wanted you to try it first. I like hearing your opinions. Your feedback means a lot to me as well as your suggestions with everything,"

Jungkook smiled at that and kissed her temple. "How lucky am I? I'm glad to hear that,"

"Moment of truth. Let me know what you think," she cut a slice and placed it on a paper plate along with a plastic fork for him.

His doe eyes looked at the slice with delight as he picked up the fork to take a big bite. His expectations for her baking were always reasonably high because he was confident in how talented she was with her baking. No matter what she does, it always turns out well.

The Golden Maknae's eyebrows furrowed immediately as he continued to eat it. The cake was moist and light as the strawberries tasted sweet. Jungkook felt like he just bit into a cloud and whatever she had done for the whipped cream enhanced the cake even more. Meanwhile, Jennie watched him chew as nervousness was at the pit of her stomach. She was her worst critic when it came to baking new recipes and hoped she did it justice. 

As she observed him he looked...angry? Did it taste nasty?

'Damn, this is good. How did I get so lucky to have a girlfriend who bakes this well?' he happily thought.

Jungkook immediately ate another forkful, chewing it vigorously as he enjoyed every bite. He kept chewing while Jennie assumed it was a negative reaction and he just wanted to keep eating to not hurt her feelings.

"U-um...Kook? You good?" she asked with some nervousness in her voice.

Swallowing the sweet bite, he looked up at her as if nothing was wrong. "Yeah, why?"

"Why? You tearing that shit up but you look mad," she giggled. "Is it good or bad? You're making me a little nervous,"

He laughed at her concerns and reassured her, "It's amazing! And this is your first time making this, too? You did a great job. The right amount of sweetness and the cream is the best part. I want another slice!"

Relief washed over her as she smiled widely and kissed his cheek. So, if something tastes really good, Jungkook looks angry when eating it. Jennie made a mental note to remember that. 

[alittlebitofloveliness]

you should absolutely write the genderbent outsiders fic, it would be so interesting to see how many things get changed. often people genderbend one person and just turn them into someone everyone's attracted to rather than looking at character, or they do change everyone but it's still all surface level changes but from what i've seen you seem like you'd do something really interesting with it

(no pressure obviously but it's a really cool idea especially with the attitudes of the outsiders (how would the scene where they meet cherry and marcia play out for example?))

HI! Ok so I do love this idea but I dont have time to wrote a full fic with the nuance it deserves but I did write out two little scenes for it so I'll post them here! One is lifted almost directly from the book its just the genderben take on it :)

“Speaking of movies,” Dalia flicked away her cigarette butt, “I’m thinking of walkin’ over to the nightly double tomorrow night. Might find someone to fool around with. Anyone wanna come?”

Stella shook her head. “The boys are takin’ me and Soda to the game.”

She didn’t need to look at me the way she did then. I wasn’t gonna try and stick around or nothing. I liked Soda’s boy, James, well enough and sometimes they’d offer me and Dar to go with them when they went to do stuff, but I wasn’t gonna try and third wheel. I’d never admit it, because Soda really likes Stella a lot, but sometimes I hate her. She doesn’t need to be half so possessive as she is over everything all the time- and Soda is my sister.

Darlene sighed, just like I knew she would. Darlene never had time to do anything with us anymore. “I have a date tomorrow night.”

She sounded less than enthused at the prospect, and Soda and I shared a look. Ever since mom and dad died, Darlene had spent nearly every night she wasn’t working going on various dates, with each guy seemingly worse than the last- and much as she tried to hide it, it wasn’t hard for Soda and me to guess why. It kind of killed me that my once vivacious sister, who’d always been so fiercely independent, was throwing herself at every mediocre guy who looked her way trying to find someone to provide for her, for us. On her own, Darlene would never consider marriage, at twenty no less, but now she had Soda to support for another year and me for another four and we all knew her two jobs were barely covering bills already. Sometimes the guilt of it, what Dar had already given up and what she was further prepared to lose made me so guilty and sad I couldn’t stand it. I knew Soda felt the same way.

Dalia just rolled her eyes. She only went on dates when it suited her, and only to cause trouble. She didn’t get Dar’s obsession with finding a good man- or if she did, she clearly didn’t respect it. 

“What about the rest of y’all? Two-bit? Jennygirl? You an’ Pony wanna come?”

“Me’n Jenny’ll come,” I knew Jenny wouldn’t open her mouth unless she was forced to, “Okay Dar?”

***************

“You make sure she gets her ass straight home, Soda,” Darlene says, “I mean it.”

I roll my eyes and she fixes me with an icy glare.

“Don’t get huffy with me, Ponygirl. You’re lucky you ain’t grounded. You know better than to be goin’ to the movie house alone.”

“But-”

“No buts,” she fixes me with a stern glare. If it weren't for how cold her eyes are she could be real pretty with her tumble of smoky curls and delicate nose. Now though, she just looks mean, like Tamina Shepard or one of the other girls who date the gang leaders round town, “you ain’t a boy Pony, you gotta quit goin’ around actin’ like one.”

[laiqualaurelote]

Press Release: Spooky Action at a Distance Album Reveal

The London Music Register - Local Interest

Spooky Action At A Distance unveils cover art for their much awaited debut album

The Ambassadors meets The Breakfast Club

Perhaps even more difficult than snagging a ticket to one of SAAAD’s sold-out club shows is trying to describe the experience to your less-lucky friends afterwards.

Their sound defies basic mortal conventions such as genre, instead better described by critic buzzwords, namely, transcendent and explosive.

Four band mates of wildly different backgrounds and styles meet to produce something that’s both the ultimate sum of their ancestral influences and entirely, uniquely theirs. Their music unabashedly melds high and low art- what begins as a pop punk song flows seamlessly into an operatic verse, while another number features elements of a baroque dance suite in what can best be defined as a modern club anthem. Their lyrics are equally packed with esoteric references and universal emotions.

It shouldn’t work- but it does. And it’s delicious. In order to tide you over until the album release, we’ve got the first look at its cover art, and as a gift to fans, it’s visually indicative of the band’s layered sound.

Many of you may be familiar with The Ambassadors from school trips to the National Gallery. The painting’s a popular subject of debate for art historians due to its detailed subjects and metaphysical symbolism. It’s reproduced faithfully here, albeit with a few cheeky adjustments.

SAAAD frontwoman Crystal Palace (yes, that Crystal Palace!) takes the place of the leftmost figure, complete with lavish outfit and undeniable rockstar swagger.

Across from her, drummer Charles Rowland stands in a dark coat, sticks clutched in a gloved hand.

Bassist Niko Sasaki lays across the top shelf à la Molly Ringwald, dandelion-crowned head at Palace’s shoulder.

Center frame- the band’s ‘brain’: virtuoso Edwin Payne sits with a lute across his lap and the painting’s infamous distorted skull slashing across his legs. (Memento mori seems to be a prevalent theme in many of SAAAD’s songs, though they often turn it into a lively celebration)

Eagle eyed fans will notice a couple additions to Holbein’s instruments- a bear figurine, a lantern, and a cherry blossom branch among them. Are they references to the band’s lyrics? Hints at future projects?

One thing’s for sure, we cannot wait to see more of this group. *

Spooky Action At A Distance’s album is available for preorder at record stores all across London.

Next live show: Saturday night at the Catabasis (tickets required in advance)

Booking inquires should be sent to Jenny Green.

HELLO I LOVE THIS?! for those unfamiliar with The Ambassadors by Hans Holbein, it's a 16th-century painting most famous for the weird distorted shape in the foreground, which looks like an alien object but is an anamorphic skull that comes into view if you approach it from certain angles. It's absolutely perfect for this band AU, I am shrieking. my eternal thanks to you anon

I actually drafted, but did not put in the fic itself, the track listing for the band's debut album AFTERLIVES, complete with writing credits:

SKELETONS IN THE CLOSET (Payne)

ACES DACES (Rowland)

LEFT OVER RITE (Payne)

TANPOPO NO KAMISAMA (Sasaki)

STICKY CRICKET WICKET (Rowland)

GIRLS’ KNIVES OUT (Sasaki, Surname von Hoverkraft)

RESTLESS PIANO SYNDROME (Payne)

PICK UP WHAT YOU’RE PUTTING DOWN (Rowland)

BRACELET ABOUT THE BONE (Payne)

BURY THE EX (Surname von Hoverkraft)

LANTERN IN THE DARK (Payne)

STAIRWAY TO HELL (Payne, Rowland) 

(bonus track)

13. GOT THE HELL OUT OF HELL (WE AIN’T GOING BACK) (Payne, Rowland, Sasaki, Surname von Hoverkraft)

gig officially gigged

[lesbicosmos]

day 6 of @palasakiweek !!

prompt: AU

summary: after an argument with charles and edwin, crystal decides to go for a walk and finds herself near the docks. she expects to sit alone on the rocks for a while. what she doesn't expect is to meet a troubled mermaid. or the case of the dandelion shrine and it's the same but niko's a mermaid so it's not

notes: i'm kinda annoyed this is late but i had exams so i haven't been able to focus on writing </3

also on ao3!

the way i love the ocean

Port Townsend was quite a sweet little town, Crystal thought as she wandered past the lighthouse gift shop. Well, it was if you ignored the witch kidnapping young girls and feeding them to the snake in her basement. And the peculiar half-cat-half-man living near the docks. Crystal had decided to go exploring a little – if that bracelet really did mean Edwin was stuck in town and they’d be sticking around for longer, she figured she should at least get to know the place.

It was serene and peaceful near the lighthouse. The gift shop made it seem like it should be a tourist spot, but there was barely anyone around, only the sound of waves hitting rocks and seagulls soaring overhead. She decided to sit for a while, and perched herself on the edge of one of the rocks, her feet dangling just above the water.

It was the most at peace she’d been since she could remember. For a moment, the salty air and the gentle sounds of the water made her forget all about her missing memories, about the demon trying desperately to get back inside her head, about how stressed her parents surely were about her whereabouts. For a moment, it was just her and the landscape.

That was, until something caught her eye. A few metres away from where she was sitting, a small area of the water appeared to be glowing a bright pink, and Crystal found herself unable to look away, transfixed by the mysterious sight. The lights seemed to dance, a few blurry shapes moving around like fish – but they couldn’t be fish – could they? Either way, it was captivating. Without even thinking, she leaned closer to them, trying desperately to look at them in more detail. She was dangerously close to falling into the water.

The lights suddenly intensified, and something breached the surface surrounded by those overwhelming colours – a girl. She was beautiful, her long dark hair flowing down over her shoulders as she floated, staring right at Crystal.

“Hi,” Crystal said softly, unable to control the smile on her face or the softening of her eyes. She was almost as transfixed by the girl’s face as she was by the strange lights.

Crystal felt an overwhelming desire to befriend this strange girl, to know her, to care for her.

“Hi,” the girl replied, in a voice as sweet as her appearance.

Then without warning, the girl ducked back under the water, and the light disappeared. Crystal snapped out of her trance, looking around her as if she’d imagined the girl altogether and had embarrassed herself in front of people talking to no one. But there was no one else there to judge her anyway.

“Hello?” she asked the water.

The water didn’t reply.

Eventually, Crystal gave up. Besides, it was getting cold, so she decided to return to the Tongue and Tail.

She left again the next day. She hadn’t intended to be out for long; she only wanted to make a point. The whole Edwin-is-stuck-in-town situation had put the three of them on edge, and with the way they kept talking about everything that was happening with David, Crystal just couldn’t handle being around them for long. She’d snapped at them, leaving the Tongue and Tail in a huff, cursing under her breath. She hoped Jenny hadn’t been too concerned.

Crystal walked aimlessly yet soon found herself near the lighthouse again, sitting on that same rock overlooking the water. It sparkled in the light of the setting sun, reflecting pinkish orange all around. It was beautiful, but she couldn’t help but think how much more beautiful those bright lights had been around the mysterious girl. She watched as the sun sank below the horizon, the sky growing darker. Just as she thought she should probably head back to Jenny’s, something – or someone – erupted from the water in front of her. Crystal gasped in shock, relaxing when she realised it was just the girl from yesterday, her dark hair flowing past her shoulders in the same satisfying way it had before. She appeared to be wearing the same bikini top from the day before, and Crystal couldn’t help but think she must be freezing in there at this time in February.

“Jesus…you made me jump.”

The girl just looked at her, smiling sweetly, and Crystal noticed the tiny reflections in her irises, like miniature stars sparkling in her dark eyes. The girl opened her mouth as if to say something but instead of words, a spew of strange rainbow goo erupted from her mouth, and she immediately lost consciousness. She sank below the surface.

Crystal panicked, immediately shedding her heavy purple coat and floral platform boots before diving into the water. She didn’t remember ever being a particularly strong swimmer but she couldn’t just leave this girl to drown.

The water was dark, and even darker at night. Crystal couldn’t see more than a few inches in front of her, so reached her arms out, flailing them around until she caught hold of a wrist and pulled the girl towards her. She was about to return to the surface when, upon holding her waist to hoist her upwards, she found scales there rather than smooth skin. She didn’t have time to think about it, dragging her upwards. She pushed her onto the rock she’d previously been sitting on, climbing out with her.

“Woah…” she said, upon spotting the girl’s pink fish tail.

She didn’t wake up, and for a moment Crystal panicked that she did the wrong thing, pulling her out of the water. What if she wasn’t waking up because she physically couldn’t breathe? Alarmed, Crystal reached up to her neck, expecting to find some form of gills there. There was nothing. From the waist up she seemed like a perfectly normal girl. And she did appear to be breathing, if shallowly. In that moment, Crystal decided she was going to stay there with her until she woke up.

“Crystal!” a familiar voice called out a while later.

“Charles?” Crystal replied, turning around to see him and Edwin walking down the steps towards her.

“There you are! God, we were getting worried-” Charles said, pausing upon spotting the girl in Crystal’s arms. “Who’s that?”

“I don’t know her name,” Crystal said. “She was just…she was here yesterday but she disappeared then she came back today, puked some weird rainbow goo then passed out. I grabbed her so she didn’t sink and then realised…yeah, that,” she pointed at the bright pink scales where the girl’s legs would be.

“How long has she been out of the water?” Edwin asked.

“A couple of hours.”

“Get her back in, quick,” he said, indicating with his hands urgently. “I’m sorry Crystal but you may have to hold her. Mermaid scales cannot dry out, they are the source of their magic.”

“Right, okay,” Crystal breathed.

She jumped back into the water, then turned around and gently pulled the mermaid in with her.

“Can you read her? We need to find the reason behind this strange illness that appears to have befallen her.”

“I can try.”

Crystal took a deep breath, taking one of the girl’s hands in her own. She closed her eyes, and second later they burst open again, her dark irises this time replaced with pure white.

What she saw made no sense. She couldn’t make much out, couldn’t comprehend what was happening, could barely even keep looking at it. It was so bright, moving so quickly, just overwhelming shapes and colours.

“I…I can’t…I…” she muttered, convulsing slightly.

“Crystal!” she could vaguely make out Charles’s panicked voice. “Can you hear me?”

She focused intensely, eventually managing to tear herself away, pulling out of the mermaid’s consciousness.

“You alright?” Charles asked.

“What did you see?”

“It’s just…bright colours. Nothing I can make out.”

Edwin scribbled something in his notebook. Crystal couldn’t even remember him taking it out.

“Right,” he said, snapping the book shut and returning it to his pocket. “We’ll have to wait for her to wake up, then. For now, you stay here while Charles and I go and do some research based on what we currently know.”

“What? You’re just gonna leave me here?”

“Crystal, to everyone else you’re already alone. You’re likely the only one here who can see us,” Edwin reminded her.

“Ugh, fine,” she complained.

“Hey, we’ll figure it out, yeah?”

Crystal nodded. She wasn’t annoyed at them this time, or even at the fact she had been left alone with this stranger. In fact, the girl had intrigued her. The lights and the tail caught her attention, sure, but there was something else – something she couldn’t quite put her finger on. There was a desire to know this girl, not just save her. The only thing causing her bad mood was the cold water surrounding her; she worried she’d catch hypothermia if she had to stay there for long.

She looked up at where the boys had gone – they were on the path near the gift shop, and Crystal could just make out the image of Charles pulling a full-length mirror from his backpack.

Once the boys had disappeared through the mirror, Crystal turned back to the girl. She didn’t look well, but beneath the illness, she was so beautiful. She had what appeared to be light blue eyeliner on her upper eyelid, curling into a small heart in the corner. For a moment, Crystal wondered whether mermaids had special waterproof makeup or if it was a natural marking. Only now did she notice that what she had originally assumed was a strapless bikini top wasn’t actually an item of clothing, and was instead just part of her, the bright pink scales across her chest matching those of her tail.

She wondered if all mermaids were this gorgeous. As she’d grown up, she’d stopped imagining them as the brightly coloured cartoons she watched as a kid, and started imagining them more like other mythical creatures, dark and cunning and visually quite terrifying. But looking at the girl in front of her, it seemed like her eight-year-old self was right. She looked like she’d crawled off the pages of an illustrated children’s book.

Crystal reached a hand up to move a piece of hair out of the girl’s face, when she began to twitch in her arms, waking up with a gasp. Seemingly upon instinct, she moved to push away from Crystal, but Crystal held on, worried she’d lose consciousness again if she let go.

“Hey, you’re okay,” she comforted. “You’re okay, I’ve got you. I’m Crystal. We met yesterday…sort of.”

“Oh,” said the mermaid, her gaze moving to where Crystal’s arm was around her waist. “You’re holding me,” she said, her face flushing slightly.

“Oh, yeah, sorry about that.” Crystal finally let go, assuming she’d be okay staying awake given she was talking fine. “You were unconscious, and I noticed you don’t have gills or anything so I was kinda worried you’d drown.”

“Thank you,” said the girl, floating barely three feet away from Crystal.

“What’s your name?” Crystal asked.

“Niko.”

It was a pretty name. It suited her perfectly.

“Well, Niko, I’ve got these friends, and they’ve gone to try and figure out what’s wrong with you.”

Niko’s mouth dropped open slightly, then she smiled.

“That’s…people don’t… people aren’t usually this calm around me.”

“What do you mean?”

“Humans seeing a mermaid? You think people are normal about that?””

“Oh. Right.”

She’d almost forgotten that she was a literal supernatural being, not just a sweet, lonely, beautiful girl from the sea.

“You’re not like that, though. You don’t seem…surprised.”

“I was a little surprised, I can’t say I’ve exactly met a mermaid before but, well…I’m a psychic, and my friends are ghosts, so… there’s hardly anything that could really actually surprise me anymore.”

“Oh. Well, thank you.”

Crystal smiled, then there were a few seconds of silence, both of them just floating in the water, before Niko spoke up again, moving closer.

“You’re shivering!”

“Oh,” Crystal said, her voice shaking slightly. “Yeah, the water’s a bit cold. I’ve been with you for a while, didn’t want your scales to dry out.”

“Come with me,” Niko said, holding her hand out to her.

Crystal could do nothing except take it, letting herself be dragged through the water. Niko’s hand was surprisingly warm against her own, and she felt the urge to grip onto her forever.

Niko led Crystal to a spot beneath some trees, surrounded by rocks. It was a small pool of water, that appeared to be bubbling like a hot spring. It certainly didn’t seem like something that should be near a small coastal town in Washington.

“What-” Crystal began.

“A witch came by several years ago and put a spell on this pool. It’ll be like this until that witch dies now. The locals are so confused they’re almost scared of it.”

“Woah…”

“Go on, climb in! You’re shaking.”

Crystal hoisted herself up onto and over the rocks, sliding into the pool. The warmth washed over her immediately and she sank into the water, only her head breaching the surface.

“Better?” Niko asked, having followed her in.

“Yeah. Thanks.”

“No problem. It’s the least I could do to say thank you. But…do you think your friends will still be able to find us here?”

“Yeah, they’re detectives, they’ll figure it out.”

“Really? So cool!” Niko said excitedly. “I wish I…”

She trailed off into silence, staring into the water between the two of them, the smile gone from her face. Crystal stood up, snapping her fingers near her. There was no response. She didn’t even blink.

“Niko? Hey, Niko!” she said, beginning to panic.

Niko’s head snapped up to her, the pink lights returning, causing her to glow. Crystal was even more transfixed than she had been the day before, able to see that the lights weren’t just colour, there were strange shapes too – like tiny starfish and bubbles floating around the top of her head.

She didn’t know how long she’d been staring before she was suddenly snapped out of it. The lights had disappeared, and Niko passed out again, slipping beneath the water. Crystal managed to catch her, holding her by the waist and ensuring she didn’t hit her head on the rock.

“Woah,” she sighed.

She hoped the boys would be back soon.

“Crystal!” she heard from above them, and turned to face the voice.

“Charles! We’re over here! She’s fainted again!”

Charles and Edwin rushed over to them. Charles sat on one of the rocks with a book in his hand, his legs dangling just above the water, while Edwin stood next to him, hands clasped politely in front of him like always.

“Did you figure out what’s wrong with her?” Crystal asked, looking up at them desperately.

She couldn’t stay in the water forever, but if they couldn’t figure out what was wrong…how could they possibly leave her? It was their job to help people and ghosts and supernatural creatures no matter what.

“Yes, I believe we did,” Edwin said. “It appears she has been possessed.”

“Possessed?” Crystal repeated, panicking.

Memories of David flooded back to her, of the way he manipulated her, stole her memories and still wouldn’t leave her alone even after having been exorcised from her body. Niko didn’t deserve to go through anything like that. No one did.

“Not a demon, though! Don’t worry,” Charles reassured, having noticed her stress. “They’re sprites.”

“Thank god. But what sprites?”

“They’re called dandelion sprites,” Edwin supplied. “They form shrines in places with a high population of dandelions.”

“Dandelions? But she’s a mermaid. Where would she find dandelions?”

“Siphonophores.”

“…Excuse me?”

“Underwater dandelions,” Charles explained. “They’re a particular type, and according to this book, their sprites can be even more of a nuisance than the common ones. They feed on attention, so at the bottom of the ocean, they have to work harder for their food. Then once they have it, they exit the host.”

“Exit how?”

“However they can. But it usually isn’t pretty.”

“Jesus fucking Christ,” Crystal sighed, her mind moving at several thousand miles an hour. “Right, So…what do we need to do?”

“We need to find the shrine.”

“It’ll be nearby underwater.”

“How the fuck are we supposed to find an underwater shrine?”

“Luckily for us, ghosts do not need to breathe. Charles and I will find it.”

Charles seemed taken aback at that comment. His eyes widened in a panic and he turned to Edwin, his fingers fidgeting with the spine of the book in his hands.

“D’you mind if I stay above the surface, mate? I’ll stick nearby the lighthouse in case you need anything but…you know I don’t do well with large bodies of water.”

“Of course, Charles,” Edwin said. “Sorry I suggested it. I should have thought-”

“It’s all good, mate.”

With that, Charles and Edwin left the girls once more, heading over to the lighthouse. Crystal could see them from where she was in the spring, but they were too far away to hear what they were saying. Edwin jumped into the water without even taking any layers of his clothes off. Crystal supposed ghosts didn’t really weigh anything if they didn’t want to, so it wasn’t a problem. Charles was just sat on the edge of the rocks, watching the spot where Edwin went under intensely. A few minutes later, Edwin resurfaced and held his hand out to Charles. Charles reached into his backpack, retrieving something from it and handing it to him. She couldn’t tell what exactly it was, but knowing them and their bag of tricks it could have been literally anything. Edwin swam beneath the surface once more.

Crystal jumped when she felt Niko move in her arms. She looked down, expecting to see her waking up like she had before, but instead she was convulsing slightly.

“Niko?”

All of a sudden, her eyes and mouth flew open, and that bright pink light came pouring out of her. Crystal was significantly more terrified of the lights this time. She had to look away for fear of being too lured in by their compulsion.

“Niko!”

Two voices then began talking through Niko’s mouth without even moving it, propelling the girl upwards so she was sitting on Crystal’s lap.

“Look at us. Behold us. Give us what we want, or we will tear the girl asunder and find a new nest.”

Then, the lights disappeared and she fell backwards once more, Crystal catching her head.

“What the fuck,” Crystal muttered as Niko started to come around.

Her nose was bleeding, so Crystal wiped the blood away with her thumb.

“What happened?” the mermaid asked shakily.

“I’m not really sure, but the boys will be back soon, I promise.”

Crystal pointed over to the lighthouse, where Charles was still intently watching the surface of the water. A few minutes later, Edwin breached the surface once again, handing something to Charles. It was a different object to whatever it was Charles took out of his backpack – bigger, rounder.

Then, Charles stood up and began walking back over to the spring, while Edwin ducked under the surface and swam towards them instead. He dragged himself up onto one of the rocks Niko was propped up against, his hair and clothes soaking. But the second he stood up, he was dry once more.

“Woah,” Niko muttered.

“One of the perks of being a ghost: you’re never soaked for long,” Edwin said proudly.

“Did you find anything?” Crystal asked, still slightly shaken from what had happened. “The sprites, I think they like…spoke through her.”

“If the sprites themselves have begun communicating with you, we’d better hurry. She likely doesn’t have long.”

“So what so we do?”

“There was a shrine down there, just at the base of the lighthouse. I managed to read the inscription. The sprites require sacrifices to keep them alive, but. This-” Edwin indicated to the glass jar Charles was holding up, “is the only thing that can contain them. We just need to find a way of coaxing them out of Niko.”

Everyone was quiet for a few seconds while they thought. Then, Crystal spoke up.

“Use me as bait.”

“No,” Charles said immediately.

“Any other ideas, Charles? You said they could explode out of her at any minute, we can’t wait much longer.”

As if hearing Crystal, Niko began to convulse once more.

“Crystal, you can’t-”

“There’s no time for this!”

“Are you sure, Crystal?” Edwin checked.

“Yes,” she turned to Charles. “I trust you.”

Crystal managed to position Niko on the rocks so she wouldn’t fall off despite the convulsions, and stepped over to the other side of the spring. Charles carefully stepped into the water, seeming to relax a little upon realising it wasn’t cold.

“You don’t have to do this, you know.”

“I do. And even if I didn’t, I would.”

It had barely been a day since she’d met this girl, but she felt a strange attachment to her. She got the feeling many people didn’t like her before everything happened with David, so knowing there was someone who liked having her around, someone who appreciated her, someone who didn’t try to push her away, was nice. And even better that it was someone as sweet as Niko – who was suffering through being possessed by sprites and throwing up rainbow goo and fainting all over the place, and yet still insisted on warming Crystal up when she was cold. She wanted to know Niko better, to become friends. She supposed mermaids must not have that many friends, trapped in the ocean as they were, so she wanted to be there for her.

Just as Crystal was imagining coming down to the docks every day to see her and get to know her properly, her thoughts were cut short by the ceasing of Niko’s thrashing. She had to do something before it was too late.

“I need to talk to the things inside Niko,” she said. “The dandelion sprites. I have a really attractive offer.”

Niko’s body suddenly sat up, the light bursting from her eyes and mouth once more.

“Insolent child. Left us to starve. Now watch while we desert this flesh.”

No. No, no, no. It wasn’t working. Crystal had to do something, she couldn’t just let those things tear the poor girl apart.

“No, wait!” she was trying not to cry. “I have something you want!”

“What could you have to satiate us?”

“Me.”

She could feel the boys’ gazes turn to her in fear.

“My body is all yours if you leave Niko without hurting her.”

“Crystal, have you gone mental?” she heard Charles say, but ignored him.

“Niko, she has a family! You can’t take her away from them! I don’t have a place. I don’t belong anywhere, please just take me instead!” she yelled desperately.

“Another body just means another hunger.”

“But I’m different. Not only could you leave the water and get attention from everyone in this town, I’m also a psychic medium! I can see the dead! Imagine the feast you could have feeding off attention from the living and the dead! Best of both worlds! You could eat your fill! That’s what you want, right? You’d never go hungry again!”

Suddenly, Niko’s body began to rise into the air, her limbs dangling downwards while the light shone up, as thought she was being propelled upwards. The sprites cackled, and the entire docks seemed to be illuminated by bright pink.

Then, it all stopped. Niko’s body dropped back down onto the rocks. Crystal swam towards her a little, keeping Charles in the middle, hoping and praying that Niko was okay.

There were quiet spluttering sounds from Niko’s mouth as the two tiny sprites crawled out. They turned around, and upon spotting Crystal, leapt upwards towards her. Crystal panicked and couldn’t move, but luckily Charles got in between them, catching the little blighters in the jar and sealing the top.

Both breathed heavily. They’d done it.

“You cut it kind of close, there,” Crystal chuckled.

“You’re welcome.”

Niko weakly shuffled across the rock until she could drop herself back into the water. Crystal was about to follow her, but Charles held her back.

“Give her a minute, yeah? She’ll be fine.”

She was under the water for much longer than a minute. Crystal and Charles had been sitting on the rocks talking for a while – Crystal had to shut down Charles’s flirting yet again, and he seemed to get the message this time, apologising. They both laughed about it.

“Well, the case isn’t totally over yet,” Charles said. “We’ve got to go back to that shrine and kill the dandelions before they can infect anyone else. Wouldn’t want an army of rainbow-spewing sea creatures on the loose around here.”

Crystal chuckled, and at that moment, something breached the surface in front of them.

“Niko?” Crystal said incredulously.

It was definitely her, the same gorgeous eyes and bright pink scales, but her hair was no longer dark – it was bright white.

“Holy shit, your hair!”

“I know, I look amazing,” Niko said, running a hand through her own locks.

“The sprites’ handiwork,” Edwin commented, stepping across the rocks towards them.

“How are you?” Crystal asked.

“I’m good. Thank you. For everything.”

Niko used the rock to push herself out of the water, and pressed a damp yet surprisingly warm kiss to Crystal’s cheek as she sat beside her. Crystal tried to hide her blush, but she could already hear Charles snickering next to her.

“It’s no problem, honestly.”

“No, really. I’ve never…there’s never been anyone who’s been as kind to me as you have. Ever since my dad died…I’ve been kind of alone.”

“Well, you don’t have to be alone anymore,” Crystal said, and placed her hand on top of Niko’s.

“But…you’re not from here, right? You’re gonna go back home soon. And I can’t exactly swim the entire ocean,” Niko’s smile faded.

“Yeah, we’re hoping we’re not stuck here for too long but we’ll come back here until then. And besides, Edwin knows magic. I’m sure there’s a spell that could let you walk. Right?” she turned to Edwin, a hopeful look in her eyes. “There’s gotta be a spell that can turn her human, right? Little Mermaid-style?”

“Yes, I believe there is such a spell in one of my transfiguration books. But, I wouldn’t exactly call Niko little.”

“I wasn’t- it’s a film- nevermind.” She turned back to Niko. “See? We can do that. If you’d want to, that is.”

“Really? That’s…yes! But…it wouldn’t be permanent, would it? I don’t want it to be permanent.”

“I’m sure we can find a temporary option, Niko,” Edwin confirmed.

“Oh my god! Thank you! I’d hug you if I could stand up.”

“It’s no problem,” Edwin chuckled. “And, I’m not much of a hugging person anyway.”

“Oh. Okay!”

They sat for a few moments, just watching the moonlight reflect off the water’s surface.

“Wait!” Niko said suddenly. “Shouldn’t you guys be going home? It’s really late.”

“Yeah you’re right,” Crystal said, her voice punctuated with a sudden yawn. “We’ll come back tomorrow though, yeah?”

“I’d like that.”

Crystal held her arms out to Niko, who collapsed forward, holding her tightly in a hug. She tried not to focus on the warmth that spread through her at the touch, at the knowledge that she’d see Niko again the next day, and likely many days after that.

She had felt so alone since everything happened with David, even after meeting Charles and Edwin. She had felt so detached from reality without her memories, knowing barely anything about her own life. But now she had someone else – another lonely soul…who just so happened to be a mermaid. She’d been wondering if maybe she hadn’t been the greatest person before everything, but now she’d been able to help someone, she’d saved a life and Niko seemed so enamoured by her already…maybe she wasn’t so bad after all.

[writingquestionsanswered]

so I'm gonna return to a WIP soon but there's one portion that I'm unsure of. how do you write a musical scene with the characters singing? is there a format I should follow?

Describing a Singing Scene

There are a few things you need to remember when writing out a scene where characters are singing.

1 - You can't use copyrighted song lyrics in any amount. This is a really important one. If you imagined your characters singing your favorite Taylor Swift song, that's a no-go lyrics-wise. However, the narrator or character could say, "Jenny belted out the lyrics to Taylor Swift's Shake It Off. Most songs published after 1927 fall under copyright protection, but for songs in the public domain--like Happy Birthday--you can use the song lyrics.

2 - You don't want to overwhelm the reader with lyrics. Even if you use a public domain song or a song that you wrote, you don't want to stick in a huge block of lyrics no matter how you format it. Like all dialogue, it works best when interspersed with exposition and action. It's a great opportunity to describe things like what the singers are doing, thoughts and emotions of the singers/listeners, what the scenery/ambience is like, dance moves, etc.

There's some wiggle room in how you format the lyrics:

-- Jenny grabbed the microphone and sang, "It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas..."

-- Jenny grabbed the microphone and sang, "It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas..."

-- Jenny grabbed the microphone and the lights faded.

It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas Everywhere you go Take a look at the five and ten, it's glistening once again With candy canes and silver lanes that glow

Her voice was low and honeyed, the lyrics pulled into a slow, romantic cadence. She swayed gently to the rhythm of the music, perched on a stool, soaking up the spotlight like sunshine.

----

Again, the key is not to just drop in a huge block of lyrics unless it really makes sense for the story.

I hope that helps!

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

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[the-irken-luxray]

Hellooo because I forgot about the whiteboard until like midnight of the expiration date I didn’t get the chance to gather final screenshots so many of people’s additions didn’t make the final post. These are all the most recent versions of the drawings I could find (and in some cases I had to edit them together)

Featuring additions from @/kursed-curtain, @/flowerbarrel-art, and numerous others (feel free to brag in the notes if you see yourselves!)

[ID 1: a bust of Jenny Coffield, a stick figure oc with short, wavy hair, a top hat adorned with multiple spheres, and a burn scar on her head, showing off a “top bomb”, a top hat shaped object with a fuse sticking out the top. Tagline text reads “it explodes in the shape of a top hat”. Around the bomb are golden sparkles and captions reading “SO COOL!”, “WOW!”, and “FUN SHAPE!!”. Below the bomb is a diagram comparing a standard cartoon bomb, captioned in red with “LAME” and an X mark, with the top bomb, captioned in green with “COOL”. To the left of Jenny is three Toppats sitting around a meeting table. Two Toppats look impressed, one saying “wow!” and the other saying “We should use that”. The third Toppat looks annoyed and says “This is a stupid meeting.” End ID]

This one is probably my fav out of the bunch, just for the collaboration aspect.

[ID 2: a full body doodle of Reginald Copperbottom grinning evilly while holding a gun. Blue text reads “autism be damned my boy can kill”. A small doodle of someone’s Toppat sona or OC fawns over Reginald with multiple floating hearts. They have a bullet behind them with a red trail mark, as though they were shot with Reginald’s gun. Adjacent is a generic stick figure who is getting shot in the head. Text pointing to the stick figure reads “the cringe”. Yellow writing reads “ding dong the wicked cringe is dead”. End ID.]

At least one Reginald is mandatory. People got silly with this one.

[ID 3: a mouthless stick figure looks confused and mildly uncomfortable while looking at the viewer. Text next to them reads “my darling”, “precious blorbo”, and “beloved”. Below the text is a blob with eyes and no mouth in a happy expression, with writing reading “blorbo!” The stick figure is holding up a sign that says “I am literally just text????” End ID.]

Okay yeah you should know who this is by now

Gave them a Wile E. Coyote type sign because it fits the whole “no mouth can’t speak” type thing they’ve got going on.

[ID 4: a doodle of Jenny’s head with text reading “Your Toppat weapon ideas HERE!” Below is a drawing of Pike Cassino, a stick figure with a top hat decorated with slot machine wheels and horns, a gold tooth, and whiskery facial hair. a speech bubble pointing to him reads “Maybe a gun that doesn’t blast me back when I fire it…” Below the prompt text is a doodle of a glittering, gold cannon labeled “solid gold cannon”. Next to it is Jenny looking annoyed with a thought bubble reading “At least I’m paid well”. End ID.]

There were a LOT more additions to this prompt than I ended up grabbing, but with how spread out they were, there would be an additional five screenshots or so just to get them all.

[ID 5: a bust of Jenny waving an aromantic flag with a caption reading “aro gang”. Next to her is a drawing of a character labeled Harley, who has a heart shaped top hat and bangs, with a Toppat clan logo on their jacket and a paw on their hand. Harley waves to Jenny and is captioned with “aro gang!” End ID.]

Another that is sadly a lot smaller than its final version. The aro gang used to be bigger.

[ID 6: 3 images of a doodle of Ellie Rose. First image is of a head shot of Ellie. Second image is text reading “world’s smallest Ellie” with an arrow pointing to an indistinguishable doodle. Third image is the previous doodle zoomed in to show a very small head shot of Ellie, approximately the size of the tip of the arrow. End ID.]

World’s smallest Ellie.

[ID 7: A whiteboardfox drawing with a thick border around it, as though it’s an external image that’s been copy-pasted. The drawing is of Burt Curtis, a stick figure with headphones and a top hat, stylized. Here he has messy, wavy, short hair and highlights in his eyes. He’s reading a magazine titled “#3 ACTion”. To the left is a frog-with-glasses icon with text reading “gotta get sillier with my art”.

To the right of the copy-pasted drawing is a frog with glasses on his hands and knees, with the glasses lenses opaque to hide his eyes. Text below reads “just found out my drawing didn’t save can’t have shit on whiteboard”. End ID.]

Yeah so I was… struggling with this one. The frog in the top left was originally a thing I tried to add to ALL my additions up make them easier to find. But because of WiFi issues, not only did none of them save, but half my Burt drawing was gone too. Fortunately, because I was already struggling bad with it, I had the foresight to screenshot the drawing once I was done with it.

[ID 8: a doodle of Reginald Copperbottom with his hands on his hips while smoking a giant blunt. To the right is a drawing of Reginald in the family guy death pose with a caption above reading “bad at smokign” [sic]. Below the whole thing is text in parentheses reading “(whiteboard if you’re gonna react my art please for the love of god let it be this one)”. End ID.]

Drawn immediately after the previous one. No further context needed.

[flufallo]

Um.... I found a random quote generator

Cat king: Hello all, it is I, your favorite person.

Charles: Actually, Edwin is my favourite.

Cat king: Okay then, it is I, that bitch.

Edwin: Do you have a self-care routine?

Jenny: "Keep going bitch" said to myself in different accents.

Charles : Do you guys want to see a butterfly?

Niko: Ooh, yes please!

Jenny, with their laptop open: I'm not going to stop working to look at a stupid bug!

Charles: It's not a bug though...

Jenny: ...

Niko: ...

Jenny: Well I still don't want to see.

Niko, realizing: Please don't throw-

Charles : Whee! *throws a stick of butter*

Monty: Edwin keeps forgetting which WiFi network they're supposed to use.

Monty: So I renamed ours to "Edwin, use this one" to help them out a little.

Charles: How would you like your coffee?

Crystal : As dark and as bitter as my soul.

Charles, shouting to someone behind the counter: I need one vanilla latte with extra cream and sugar!

Cat king: Fuck you.

Esther : No u.

Cat king: I'm down.

Esther : You're like 2, what the fuck-

Cat king: I AM NOT 2!

Cat king: Monty is a strings kid. We must sacrifice them to the band gods.

Charles: Yes.

Crystal : You're right. It'd be a good initiation for me.

Monty: Wait, guys, what about the truce we signed-

Charles: What truce?

Cat king: *sigh* The truce that we must destroy all the choir kids and leave the strings alone.

Esther : Wait, I'm a choir kid!

Everyone else: *prepares for sacrifice*

Squad reactions to being called straight:

Jenny: The fuck, no I'm not.

Edwin : Excuse the hell out of you?

Cat king: Ding dong, you are wrong!

Charles: Who told you that? And why did they lie?

Niko: Rude.

Esther : *punches the person*

Cat king: FIGHT ME, YOU NERD ASS SLUT!

Esther : At least try to sound slightly more sophisticated when you threaten someone.

Cat king: Oh, I'm sorry. I should ask; dost thou want to engage in a duel, my good bitch?

Esther : Somehow that's worse

Jenny: Well, if you're not at least a little bit gay for your friends, then what kind of friend are you?

Monty: What makes a bigger memory than a passionate kiss?

Edwin: A stab wound.

Jenny: You are now one day closer to eating your next plate of nachos.

Monty: That's the most hopeful thing I've ever heard.

Niko: But what if I die tomorrow and never eat any nachos?

Crystal : Then tomorrow is nacho lucky day.

Niko: I just want someone to take me out.

Crystal : On a date?

Cat king: With a sniper gun?

Esther : Both if you're not a coward.

Esther : OKAY, YOU KNOW WHAT?! TIME OUT! GET ON TOP OF THE FRIDGE! GET UP THERE!

Monty: *Climbing* THIS HOUSE IS A FUCKING NIGHTMARE!!!

Cat king: Is this mistletoe?

Edwin: Uh, no, no, that is basil.

Cat king: Too bad cause if it was mistletoe I was gonna kiss you.

Edwin: Yeah, no, it’s still basil.

Charles: You know what’s funny about Edwin? They’re my best friend, and anyone who’d hurt them is someone I’d murder, probably.

Charles: I’ve only had Edwin for a day and a half but if anything happened to them I would kill everyone in this room and then myself.

Cop: What are your names?

Esther: Don't tell them, Cat king.

Cop, writing: Cat king...

Esther: Crap.

Cat king: Nice going, Esther.

Cop:

Cat king: Uh oh.

Monty: I’m taking a look at your numbers, and it doesn’t look good. You have a lot of measurements. Quite a few variables.

Charles: Is that… bad?

Monty: Variables are the #1 risk factor for outcomes. The past is a big contributor to the future.

Charles: Isn’t that just causality?

Monty: Causality is the leading cause of death in this country.

Charles: So what are my odds?

Monty: Do you have a family history?

Charles: Of what?

Monty: Just, in general.

Charles: …Yes?

Monty: Oh no.

Niko, texting Edwin : *sends a voice message*

Edwin , texting back: I’m a little busy, is it urgent?

Niko: No, don’t worry, just listen later.

*later*

Edwin : *presses play*

Niko's voice message: THERE’S A FIRE-

Monty: Onion rings are vegetable donuts.

Esther , used to Monty being dumb: Sure...

Monty: Your stomach thinks all potatoes are mashed.

Esther : Okay?

Monty: Lasagna is spaghetti flavored cake.

Esther :

Monty: Lobsters are mermaid scorpio-

Esther : Jesus, that one is a little-

Jenny, interested: No, no, Monty, keep going.

Crystal : But we’re friends! I was building up to calling you a nickname soon!

Edwin: That’ll never happen! In fact, you just lost “Edwin” privileges. From now on, you can call me by my last name or ‘Hey, you.’.

Crystal : Come on, Edwin.

Edwin: *glares*

Crystal : Come on, Hey you.”

Crystal : That shirt looks great, Charles.

Charles: Thanks.

Crystal : But I bet it would look even better on Edwin's floor.

Edwin: Are you hitting on Charles... for me?

Cat king: What do we think of Monty?

*pause*

Charles: *sighs* Nice pal.

Crystal : I think they're gay.

Esther : What am I supposed to do?

Monty: If I were you? I’d try and make peace with whatever deity, pantheon, or Divine Other you believe in.

Esther : I’m an atheist.

Monty: Then just get ready to die I guess

*playing twister*

Crystal : Right hand red.

Charles: *ends up on top of Edwin *

Edwin: You're doing this on purpose, aren't you?

Crystal : I stopped spinning like 15 minutes ago. Honestly, I'm surprised you didn't notice

Cat king: So... who's the big spoon and who's the little spoon?

Edwin: We're chopsticks!

Cat king: Well... that's cute!

Cat king: Does that mean you two snuggle together perfectly?

Charles: No, it means that if you take the other away, the only thing the other is good for is stabbing.

Monty: Do you want to play 20 Questions?

Edwin: Sure!

Edwin: Whats your favorite color?

Monty, laser fucking focused: Triangle. Do you like men?

Edwin: I love the term 'partners'. Are we dating? Are we robbing a bank? Are we the dedicated detectives who investigate these vicious felonies and are members of an elite squad known as the special victims unit? Who knows

Cat king, to Esther : All right, let’s tell each other a secret about ourselves. I’m going to go first– I hate you.

Cat king: I’m a bad person, I’m a very bad person, I’m a horrible person.

The Squad:

Cat king: No you’re not, Cat king! We still love you, Cat king!

Esther : This should be illegal!

Jenny: It is.

Jenny: What scares you guys the most?

Charles: Werewolves!

Niko: Sharks.

Edwin: The unstoppable marching of time that is slowly guiding us all towards an inevitable death.

Monty:

Monty: Edwin.

Charles: What do you think Cat king will do for a distraction?

Edwin: They'll probably, like, make a noise or throw a rock. That's what I would do.

*Building explodes and several car alarms go off*

Edwin: ...or they could do that.

Charles: Pfft, you should meet Niko, they're such a tsundere.

Monty: They... they just stabbed you.

Charles: So cute.

Cat king: All in all, a 100% successful trip.

Niko: But we lost Esther .

Cat king: All in all, a 100% successful trip!

*Cat king falls over*

Monty: Cat king! Are you alright?

Cat king: Is that you, God?

Monty: What?

Cat king: It's just, you sound a lot more like Monty than I expected.

[sineala]

What do you think of Iron Man Volume 2? The Heroes Reborn stuff

When you asked this, I had not read any of v2 -- for any title -- beyond isolated panels, and I was fully prepared to tell you it was bad.

Then I thought, "No, I haven't actually read v2 properly, and I shouldn't just say that without having read it. I should form my own opinion. And IM v2 is only 13 issues." So I just read it.

It's still bad.

The sad thing is that it's not actually the worst comic I've read. It's bad, but it's only… medium bad? I have definitely read things that are worse than Iron Man v2. That doesn't mean it's in any way good. It's just not The Worst.

(It's The Crossing. The Crossing is worse than IM v2. If you have any other answer to "what is the worst comic book?" then I know that you have not read The Crossing because there is no other possible answer. Nothing is worse than The Crossing. Please do not take this paragraph as some kind of reverse-psychology encouragement to try to read The Crossing. It is so bad. It is bad in a way that no other comic can even approach. You will be sorry. I own it in hardcover.)

Insofar as anything would have been able to improve the IM v2 reading experience, it turns out that reading IM v2 in isolation doesn't do it a lot of favors. I didn't know this before I read any of it, but there are multiple issues that are crossovers with FF, Cap, and Avengers v2 -- and they're the kind of four-part crossover where each part is really in a different book, so it's hard to wing it. I knew that the #13 issues were Wildstorm crossovers, and in the case of IM v2 #13 specifically StormWatch (which I am familiar with in the sense that I've read The Authority so I know who Jenny Sparks is, but I don't know that I ever read the original StormWatch, because it's been a while). Anyway, it turns out that #6 and #12 are also the same kind of four-part crossover, so like a quarter of this comic is already incomprehensible crossovers! Great!

I do actually own the other three v2 series, and I could in fact have read them along with this, but I decided I had suffered enough.

The other thing I didn't realize is that these v2 series don't actually explain how everyone got back to 616. I thought they would! They did not! It turns out this is covered in Heroes Reborn: The Return, which is a separate miniseries taking place after v2 and is not the same thing as Heroes Return (either of them) which is obviously a different thing. Thanks, comics. I did go and skim that to get a general idea of the plot. It's not as bad as v2, possibly because Peter David was doing the writing, and the art is also less bad.

Because, yeah, the IM v2 art is horrendous. The best thing I can say about it is that it's not quite as bad as The Crossing and also that, luckily, IM v2 is not the v2 book Rob Liefeld was drawing, although everyone who was drawing these books appears to have wanted to be Rob Liefeld, in terms of style. But this doesn't mean you are free from horrors like this:

The IM v2 armor design is also bad. I say this as someone who does not normally care about armor in the sense that armor doesn't usually affect whether I like a run, as it does for some Iron Man fans. Is it nice if Tony has aesthetically-pleasing armor? Sure! Who doesn't want to look at nice things? But if a run has good writing, Tony could be wearing a cardboard box and I wouldn't care. In my favorite IM run, he literally lives in a cardboard box and later constructs a superhero outfit out of other superheroes' spare uniform bits!

However, the v2 armor sure got hit with the ugly stick:

So that's not… really helping.

The actual plot was-- I mean, yeah, no, it wasn't great, and it did start out with Tony being terrible and uncaring, and then approximately 50% of it was about the Hulk, who was not the character I'd come here to read about, and there were the aforementioned inexplicable crossovers.

What was left of the plot didn't make much sense, and I'm not sure if any of this was actually explained clearly in the other books, but as far as I can tell what was going on was that all the heroes here were dropped onto Counter-Earth here after fighting Onslaught, and given memories and backstories to suggest that they'd always been here, and a lot of their backstories weren't the same. In Tony's case, he wasn't the original Iron Man; this was Conner O'Reilly (Rebel), one of Tony's friends from college, who died being Iron Man. Tony then ends up being Iron Man but of course Rebel isn't really permanently dead and he comes back to fight Titanium Man with Tony. The series treats this information like you of course already knew it and it already happened, which, since comic books already do this while talking about things that did actually happen in previous comics, makes it even more incomprehensible. I spent like three issues wondering if I was actually supposed to know this character.

(Somehow Rebel shows up again in Fabian Nicieza's Thunderbolts run. IDK how, I haven't read it. I have, like, five T-Bolts books in my TBR pile. I do fully intend to read T-Bolts at some point. It just hasn't happened yet.)

I will say that the one interesting thing about reading IM v2 here was how much of it ended up in the MCU. I wasn't expecting that. I know people always say that about Ults, and I can definitely see where the MCU took some inspiration from Ults, but no one ever says that about v2. And I can see why they would do it, because both Ults and v2 are reimagined versions that are trying to tell a story that sort of evokes the feel of 616 without the reader actually needing to be familiar with decades of comics. Which is, you know, the thing the MCU wanted to do, so it makes sense. I just hadn't realized the MCU had borrowed any of this.

What did the MCU take from IM v2? Probably the most notable aspect is Tony being BFFs with Bruce Banner. Here in the v2 backstory, Tony, Bruce, Reed, Doom, and Hank all went to college together and became friends (or frenemies, in the case of Doom). Everyone on that list other than Bruce already had some kind of connection to Tony in 616. Mostly science friendship. Or, uh, science enmity, in the case of Doom. Bruce actually didn't have any connection to Tony, in 616. The Hulk leaves the Avengers in issue #3 and pretty much does not come back until after comics start getting MCU-ified. I think the Hulk being on Hickman's initial Avengers team and also Bendis' Avengers Assemble is when that started happening. So that's all starting in 2012, for sure.

Bruce does not play well with others in 616; the main team he's ever associated with is the Defenders, whose raison d'être is not playing well with others -- like, Namor's on the Defenders. 616 Tony and 616 Bruce were absolutely not BFFs and Hulk was never a regular Avenger; every so often, when they were building new teams, the Avengers called and asked him if he wanted to come back and he told them to fuck off. Tony's never, like, calling him up for advice. They're not friends. If you are here from MCU fandom, I really want to stress this. They're not friends. If Tony needs a science buddy, he probably calls Reed Richards. And yet, here, in v2, Bruce and Tony are lifelong BFFs! They were roommates in college! Tony cares deeply about him, to the point that half the plot of this series is actually about him trying to help the Hulk! I really wasn't expecting that.

The other thing in IM v2 that might look familiar to you, the MCU fan, is Tony/Pepper. They clearly have some UST all throughout v2 -- which, sure, is a thing they had in 616 -- but here, they actually sleep together, which they had never done in 616 at the time. (This actually happens in Heroes Reborn: The Return #4, if you've read IM v2 and are wondering how you missed it.) The only time Tony and Pepper sleep together in 616 is during World's Most Wanted, an arc that came out in 2009, which was clearly after IM1 and also clearly taking inspiration from IM1 because Tony gets a glowy light in his chest by the end of the arc after that one. So, yeah… it looks like MCU grabbed the canon Tony/Pepper too.

(Over in Cap v2, Steve is actually a robot fucker. He has also slept with robots on regular Earth-616. Come on, MCU! Why are you cowards?)

So, yeah. It's not by any means a great comic, but IM v2 is not the worst comic I have ever read, and it's actually kind of an interesting read from the perspective of seeing what they borrowed for MCU. I'm not saying you should run out and read this right now or anything, though. I personally took a bunch of plot notes while I was reading this just so I would never have to read it again.

Also, please enjoy this page from IM v2 #9 in which Tony brings Thor to Avengers Mansion to show him his hole.

Please note that Tony wishes that he had instead chosen to show his hole to Steve. This is all I am going to say about this.