#janus sanders fanfiction

[lefaystrent]

"I want to tell you something."

Thomas speaks the words into the quiet of the kitchen. He stares down at the pot of water sitting on the stove. The burner has been lit, and the heat rises. Soon, the water will boil.

"And it's- it's something that I've thought for a long time now. Years. But I've never said anything."

The smallest of bubbles rise to the surface. Over his shoulder, Thomas can see Patton sitting at the bar.

"It's okay. Take your time," he says. His nose scrunches up as he smiles. His glasses reflect a scattering of kitchen light.

Thomas snorts. "I think years is enough time." He breaks a bundle of pasta in half, letting them fall gently into the steaming water. He adjusts the temperature, then shifts on his feet. "I've just...never said anything," he repeats.

"You don't have to say anything at all." Janus sits at the bar instead. He wears a frown, and he's leaned over the surface with his chin in a propped palm, but the patience in his gaze belays his bored demeanor. "If you don't want to, you don't have to. I certainly won't force you."

Want to? No.

Thomas shakes his head and stirs the pot. "I think I need to."

"Do you?" Logan sits at the bar. His arms are folded over his tie, but it's not an intimidating pose. It's careful. Considerate. "I'd like you to take a moment to 'check yourself before you wreck yourself', as they say. Is that how you use that phrase?"

Thomas rolls his eyes, and yet he's smiling. This is a heavy topic, but it's not constricting. He stirs the noodles easily and they begin to fold together like they were made to. "I'm okay. I don't need to think about it more. I'm not anxious, not really."

"Yeah?" And now it's Virgil sitting at the bar. He stops as if he had been caught in the middle of playing with the string of his hoodie. Then he smooths down the front of his clothes. No ruffles here. He nods. "Good. That's good. That's good, right?"

Thomas still smiles. "Yes, that's good." The pasta softens as it swirls around the water. Round and round it goes. When will it stop? Nobody knows.

"Well don't just keep me in suspense!" Remus slams his hand down on the bar. And then he does it again and again, maybe just to hear the smack, smack, smack. He's not grinning maniacally or anything. Just a quirk of his mustache. A glint in his eyes. A cocked brow. "You know I love a good tease... but this is playing too coy!"

Thomas heaves a huge sigh. "I guess I just..." He trails off. He knocks the spoon against the pot's rim to shake off the water. He sets it aside. "I just don't want this to change anything."

The warmth of the burner blankets his face. The stove vent thrums above his head, and distantly Thomas hears the air conditioner click on. A light sheen of perspiration beads across his face, but its not wholly unpleasant.

Would it be bad? If this did change anything?

Roman sits at the bar. His shoulders are low, like all the breath has left him. He watches Thomas calmly with sad eyes. "What have you got to lose?"

In the pot, the pasta swirls and swirls until it's ready.

"I love you," Thomas finally says, and he turns to look over his shoulder to find that it's himself who sits there.

The other him beams proudly. "That wasn't so hard, now was it?"

Satisfied, Thomas flicks off the stove burner and drains the water in the sink. He stirs together noodles, hamburger meat, and red sauce, until its in perfect measures, just the way he likes it.

After making himself a plate, Thomas sits at the dining table. He is alone with himself, and he's alright with that.

[sleepyvirgilprompts]

Virgil:

Virgil: Nope. No way. Absolutely not, not right now. Goodbye, good night, Janus go fuck yourself.

Janus: And the same to you.

[prodigal-explorer]

sanders sides controversial opinions poll!

hi, guys! i've been in the sanders sides fandom for a few years now, and i've been really curious about where the majority of fans stand in terms of the most hot topics in the fandom right now. i made a nice little google form, and i'd love it if you guys filled it out with your opinions, anonymously, of course! there are no wrong answers, it's just opinions, and i want to know the real information, so don't worry about getting flamed or hated on because that's not going to happen!

also please reblog or send to your fander friends! i want this to reach as many interested people as possible!!

[yomica12345]

Royal AU?

I know there are plenty of Royal AUs in the Sanders Sides fandom already but... If I were to do one who would you want to be royalty? I may take the results of this poll into consideration as I'm coming up with my concept, but I'll give you a little peek of what to expect by sharing my placeholder title: Royals and Wizards. Are the royals not going to be wizards or are they wizards themselves? Who knows? Also I may have multiple Princes so... make sure to reblog especially if it means others may want the same side(s) to be royalty. But the first place vote will be the concept I will ultimately be going with for this au.

Here are possible concepts for what each side(s) au may be like if they're at the top of the poll:

Roman and Remus:

Two brothers fighting for the crown as their parents aren't exactly sure which of them is the oldest. In order to have a chance at the crown they must find love and be the first to marry. Who would find love first or would it just be a race to get someone to agree to a marriage?

Virgil:

Virgil never wanted the responsibility of a kingdom to be placed on his shoulders but with the King and Queens passing the mantel will soon fall to him. Unable to handle the stress Virgil decides to run away to try and escape the responsibility. Will he be able to escape the crown or will he be found in time to be crowned king?

Logan:

Prince Logan has got it bad for Virgil. (Yes, Analogical because I'm obsessed) But betrothed from a young age Logan has to decide to whether to take up his responsibility as the prince to marry someone for the good of the kingdom or take the decision into his own hands and go with the man he truly loves. (In this one Logan would most likely be a wizard so wizard antics would definitely play a part in the story)

Patton:

As heir to the thrown Patton needs to find someone who he can trust to rule along side him and in order to this a selection is held. (Yes like based off the Selection Series but make it gay and Sander Sides) Meeting with different suitors Patton has trouble narrowing the list of suitors down. Will he be able to find The One?

Janus:

Janus has had a rivalry with a prince of a neighboring kingdom since he was young. (Not sure who the other prince would be yet) Wanting to get back at this other prince he sneaks into their kingdom and their sleeping quarters in order to steal something as leverage against them. However his plan goes awry as he's caught and his lies have him committing himself to spying on himself for this prince who actually just wants to win his heart. Will Janus end up developing feelings back? He certainly hopes not.

P.S. I might come out with another poll later for who you may want to see as a wizard.

[just-want-fluff]

are sander sides people still alive here?

[the-bisexual-bitch]

I need more analogical in the headspace. I don't want AUs, I want my two Little Autistic Guys shoved together in the brainspace because Virgil is having a Bad Time and none of the more 'emotional' sides are available (they were helping Thomas or something), so Logan helps. Or Virgil just SPECIFICALLY wants to be around Logan.

I need more of them being specifically described in the brainspace and looking different from Thomas. I need more of them being mildly upset that they don't look like themselves when they're helping Thomas.

I need more of the darksides and lightsides being basically two weird semi-funtional poly relationships.

I need more of Virgil having been in an unhealthy relationship with one of the Darksides and thinking he got away from them

I need more of Janus actually biting people and having venom.

I need more angst around Virgil feeling like he's a poser who's actually Bad and undeserving of the care given to by the Lightsides

I need more of Virgil not liking the phrases "Darkside" and "Lightside"

I need more of Virgil feeling infantilized by Patton and Patton struggling to get it

I need more long essays written about One Line to read and be convinced by.

(Please recommend fics, artists, tumblr accounts, etc.. I'm begging you.)

[ronithesnail]

HELLO IM NOT DEAD :D

I participated in this year’s TSS Big Bang and drew for @logarhythm-bees fic “To Unearth and Back Again” :D

@tss-storytime

Link to Chapter one:

(The rest should be out soon as far as i know)

(Closeups under cut cuz i love the closeups)

[micropoet]

Burned

Inspired by “The Line” by Twenty One Pilots. I might add more chapters to this later, so comment if you want to see more. Enjoy!

What if Virgil leaving the Dark Sides was a painful process in more ways than one? 

TW: Blindness, illness, burns, fighting, bad feelings lol

Ft. Mostly Virgil and Janus, but everyone else shows up for half a second.

Take a seat

But I'd rather you not be here for

What could be my final form

Stay your pretty eyes on course

Keep the memories of who I was before

So stay with me because

My body's on the line now

I can't fight this time now

I can feel the light shine on my face

Did I disappoint you?

Will they still let me over

If I cross the line?

---------------------------------

Virgil sunk back to the dark side with his eyes firmly closed. He opened them slowly, adjusting to the darkness in stages. He squinted out into the shadows, then fully opened his eyes. Virgil tried to pick out the shapes of his desk and his bed, and after a few minutes of tensely waiting Virgil could make out their outlines.

Out of habit, Virgil flicked his light switch on and off. He barely noticed the difference between the two. How long would it be before he couldn’t see anything on the Dark Side? 

A knock at the door interrupted the depressing thought. Virgil shuffled to his door and pulled it open. 

“Ah, so you are back,” Janus stated and shuffled into the room without waiting for an invitation. Virgil rolled his eyes and moved to close the door. He froze when something brushed his arm. 

He hadn’t seen anything there. What touched him? Did one of Remus’ creatures sneak its way into his room? Janus would have told him about that, right? But what if Janus couldn’t see it either? What if it was creeping around, waiting for one of them to drop their guard, then it could… 

A hand grabbed Virgil’s arm and he most definitely did not scream. 

“What’s wrong?” Janus asked. The hand was Janus’. 

“Something touched me! Is there…? I thought…?” 

“You’re not making sense, sweetheart.” 

Virgil felt Janus’ cold hands move to rest on either side of his face. 

“Oh dear! You’re burning up!” Janus exclaimed. A hand was moved to Virgil’s forehead. He sighed into the coolness, letting Janus’ cold blood suck away the excess body temperature. 

Janus tutted. “Come. Lay down. No, no whining. You need to lay down.”

With half-hearted grumbling, Virgil found himself being gently shoved into his bed. The covers felt cool and crisp against his fevered skin. He’d always been freezing cold, what was happening? 

“Here.” Janus stated. 

“Here, what?” 

“Tea.”

“... what?”

“Seriously? Can you not see the cup of tea that I’m holding six inches from your face?” Janus asked incredulously. 

“Whatever,” Virgil scoffed. He squinted in the darkness to see the edge of a cup and hesitantly reached out to grab it. 

“Virgil,” Janus’ voice was deadly serious. “Can you really not see the cup?” 

Virgil’s hand closed over the warm mug, but Janus refused to release his hold. 

“Answer me, Virgil.” 

“It’s not a big deal-

“Answer. Me.” 

Virgil paused. 

“Sweetheart…” Exasperation filled Janus’ tone. 

“Jan, you don’t need to worry about it.” Virgil started. 

“Worry about what? The fact that you can’t see something a foot in front of you? Or the fact that you’re lying to me?” 

“I’m not answering that question.” 

“Why?” Virgil didn’t reply. Janus finally let go of the mug. “Why won’t you listen to me on this? Why won’t you admit those Light Sides are bad for you?” 

Again, Virgil stayed silent. What could he say to resolve their months’ long debate? Staring at the near empty-blackness, Virgil couldn’t recall his usual defenses and justifications. Eventually, Janus sighed. He sounded so tired. Virgil heard him step away from the bed. The anxious side panicked at the sudden absence and the disappointment he was sure Janus had on his face. 

“I told them my name.” The words tumbled out of Virgil’s mouth before he could think about them. “We were filming and it just kind of… slipped out.” 

The silence in the room was heavy.

“I’ll let you rest, but we’re not done with this conversation. I’ll let you know when dinner’s ready.” Janus said simply. Virgil only knew Janus had left the room from the sound of the door clicking shut. 

The warm cup of tea felt like flames on his skin. Even the bed became unbearably hot. Virgil took off his hoodie, but kept it close, unwilling to lose it to the darkness around him. It was too hot to sleep, and too dark to do anything else, so Virgil simply lay there thinking of Janus’ threat to continue the conversation. 

Honestly, he’d been narrowly avoiding talking about the Light Sides for weeks. Janus hadn’t thought much of it when Virgil had first joined a video, but his opinion had quickly shifted when Virgil returned. The shift between the Light and Dark Sides wasn’t like walking through a door, it was a whole different environment. It was… well lighter, with the Light Sides. Brighter might be a better word as colors appeared more vibrant, smells more potent, every sense was amplified on their side. That, and the Light Side was unbearably hot, like standing on the surface of the sun. 

The first few times Virgil had returned from filming with debilitating migraines and shivering uncontrollably. Janus took care of him (and Remus promised not to use his jackhammer during those times, which was something) but Virgil could tell it weighed on him. It was around his third or fourth time going to the light sides when Janus broke down. He begged Virgil not to go back, to stay on the Dark Side where he was safe. 

Janus didn’t understand that it wasn’t up to Virgil anymore. There was an instinct driving him forward, pulling him back to the Light Side over and over again. Even when Virgil tried to resist the pull, he’d wind up back at the Light Sides, no matter how badly it hurt. 

But Virgil hadn’t been able to explain this, not in any kind of valuable way, and it had devolved into an argument. At least, until the migraines went away. At that point, Virgil reached sort of an equilibrium between the two sides. The fighting stopped and it was almost normal. Virgil would come home from filming and join one of Janus’ self-care days or watch Remus make questionable modern art. But of course Virgil wasn’t lucky enough for that to continue. 

He noticed the temperature changes first. He hadn’t noticed when it first became comfortable to be on the Light Side, but he had noticed when everything on the dark side started to feel colder. Even taking scalding hot showers couldn’t match with his apparently elevating body heat. That had been relatively easy to hide from Remus and Janus, not that they were continuing to point out what was wrong with going to the Light Sides. They assumed that he had figured out the balance between the sides. They didn’t think they’d have to deal with any weird illnesses again. And Virgil couldn’t take the disappointed stares, so he kept it to himself. The vision changes were much harder to hide. 

The dark side grew dimmer and dimmer at an alarming rate. At first, Virgil could rest in his room for a little while until his eyes adjusted to the darker area, then go on with his day. But as the light gradually disappeared from his home, Virgil was at a loss. He spent more time in his room, trying to hide the reality of the situation from his family, but that only brought accusations. 

Remus was the first to suggest that Virgil might prefer the light sides over his family. Virgil wasn’t sure if it was an intrusive thought or something Remus had actually been worried about. In the end it didn’t matter because Virgil could only dispel the suspicion once or twice before it set in. 

Virgil had to say no to so many of Remus’ “outings” that the creative side had stopped asking him altogether. Virgil could go days without seeing or hearing from Remus, which was a feat in itself. Janus, on the other hand, only grew more clingy. Nearly every conversation between the two was an interrogation or an argument. Janus wanted to know why Virgil was filming so many videos, why he spent so much time in his room, why he was so jumpy recently, why he didn’t do any of his normal activities. Why why why why. 

It never stopped. And while staring at the pitch-black space where his ceiling was supposed to be, Virgil nearly started to cry. It was hopeless, wasn’t it? If he hid what was happening to him, Remus and Janus thought he was avoiding them. If he showed them what was happening to him, they would demand he stop seeing the Light Sides and Virgil couldn’t just stop. So Virgil just resigned himself to waiting, taking the suspicion, and holding out until he got better. 

What if he didn’t get better? What if he spent the rest of his life trapped in darkness? What if he couldn’t see Janus or Remus again? What if the only burst of light he got was when he filmed a video. Could he live like that? If the heat kept building Virgil was sure he couldn’t. But would Janus keep taking care of him, even if Virgil couldn’t give him an honest answer? Janus would never abandon him. They’d been through a lot and fought a lot, but Janus was always there for him when it counted. But part of Virgil wondered if there was an end to Janus’ patience. 

“Oh Virgin~!” Remus called from outside the door. “Dinner’s ready! Hurry before I come up with something creative to do to your plate!” 

Virgil shook off the train of anxious thoughts and stood up. He traced the wall with the tips of his fingers, trying to lead himself back to the kitchen. As he struggled to find the doorknob, Virgil was struck by a horrifying thought that it may be getting darker. 

“It’s okay. You’re okay. Breathe. Breathe.” Virgil repeated. He closed his eyes. Strange, it was darker with his eyes closed, but only half as terrifying. His closed around the doorknob. With a sigh of relief, Virgil opened his eyes and pushed the door open. What greeted him was a black void. 

Virgil took in strained breaths. He was fine. Perfectly fine. He walked forward five steps and bumped into the small table they had in the hallway. No problem. Virgil turned to the left and walked forward. He found the wall with his fingers. He found the deep gouges where Remus had practiced with his morningstar. He was almost there. He was so close. 

Something cold and slick pressed into Virgil’s side. He froze, waiting for Remus’ cackling laughter. There was no laughter. Instead, the thing disappeared somewhere into the infinite blackness. Virgil shook. 

There was something there. Something that moved. And he couldn’t see it. It could be anything. It could be anywhere. Virgil hadn’t even heard it move. Was it still there? What was it waiting for? He couldn’t see ANYTHING.

Virgil dropped to the ground in a fetal position. Panic gripped his entire body. His eyes frantically scanned the surrounding area, to see nothing. Absolutely nothing. Virgil tensed and tucked his head defensively. 

The thing could be anywhere. It was waiting for him, Virgil knew it. The fear seeped like ice through his blood, freezing him in place. It was dark. It was so so dark. Anything could happen and Virgil couldn’t move and he was all alone in the dark and it was so hot his skin was melting and it wouldn’t stop it wasn’t stopping it will never-

“-gil. Virgil!”

Hands, too many hands, grabbed him out of the darkness. He couldn’t see where they started or where they ended. It was endless. Where were they taking him? 

“Virgil, please. Focus on me. Focus on my voice.”

“I can’t! It’s here. They’re everywhere. I-I….”

“It’s alright, sweetheart. It’s just me. It’s just Janus. You’re safe.”

“There was a-”

“Shhh, little one. Breathe with me.” 

Janus counted. His hands tapped out the rhythm. Virgil struggled to follow along, shaking through uneven breaths. Janus’ pattern stayed steady. Virgil looked instinctively for Janus’ hands, but couldn’t see anything. He couldn’t even see his own body. Virgil felt like he was floating in darkness, completely isolated in the pitch black. 

“Stay with me, sweetheart.” 

The hands squeezed Virgil, reminded him of his body. He whined. It was so hard to stay present. He screwed his eyes shut. 

“Just focus on my voice and relax.” 

And Virgil did, eventually. As Virgil’s breathing evened out, Janus drew him into his chest in a hug. Virgil caved into the familiar gesture easily, closing his eyes as Janus wrapped him in his arms. It was nearly impossible to be afraid when Janus held him like that. But as he calmed down further, Virgil realized that Janus was just waiting to start the interrogation. 

“Would you like to tell me what got you so worked up?” Janus questioned. His tone remained calm. 

“No,” Virgil answered. He kept his eyes firmly closed. 

“Will you open your eyes for me?” 

Virgil shook his head. 

“Why not?”

“It’s too dark,” Virgil muttered. 

“I would think it would be darker with your eyes closed, sweetheart.” Janus chuckled. One of his many hands brushed away Virgil’s bangs. Virgil flinched at the bitter cold. 

“Please open your eyes for me.” Janus’ tone was so soft and pleading that Virgil complied. He opened his eyes, facing the void.

“Dear, can you see me?” 

Virgil was already in shattered pieces on the floor, but somehow, that question broke him further. “It’s so dark,” Was all Virgil managed to say before bursting into sobs. Janus breathed in sharply, then tightened the hug. 

“Oh sweetheart. I’m so sorry. It’ll be alright. You’re going to be okay.” 

The words were comforting, but Virgil could hear the waver in Janus’ voice. He was lying. 

“What’s wrong with emo?” Remus’ voice cut through the darkness. Virgil didn’t even bother attempting to answer. 

“He can’t see,” Janus answered for him. “The Lights did something to him.”

“Those mother-”

“It wasn’t them.” Virgil answered quickly. 

“You don’t need to defend them, Virgil.” 

“I’m not defending them. It’s the truth!” Virgil pulled away from the hug but kept a hand on Janus for stability.

“Oh, so your eyes just suddenly don’t work for no reason?” Janus retorted sarcastically. 

“Ooo! They could have imploded and be leaking blood into your brain right now!” 

“Not helpful, Remus.” 

 “I’m telling you, this has nothing to do with them. Use your mind reading thing if you have to, I’m NOT LYING.” Virgil repeated firmly. 

“Then what caused this? Because you could see this morning, you come back from the Light Side and you’re suddenly blind? What do you want me to believe?” 

“Me, Janus,” Virgil spat. “I want you to believe me.” 

“Then tell me what happened when you stayed late today, hm?” Janus’ voice was a near growl. 

“We were brainstorming for the next video. Nothing crazy.” “You mean the next video where they ridicule you?” Remus snapped. 

“They’re not really like that!”

“But they’d blind you?” 

“They didn’t do anything to me!” 

“Stop saying that!” 

“Then stop denying it!” 

“I’m not denying anything! It’s the truth!” Virgil’s heart thudded in his chest as he screamed. The heat in his body built like steam in a pressure cooker. The darkness surrounded and suffocated. 

Janus grabbed Virgil’s arm. Virgil lurched forward as Janus yanked him. He could feel the coldness of Janus’ breath on the side of his face. 

“If they’re so trustworthy, why don’t you stay with them instead?” 

The words burned white-hot. The hand on Virgil’s arm scalded his skin. Then suddenly, he could see. 

Brilliant light dispelled all darkness. In the stark white light Virgil could see Janus’ face in stunning clarity. Virgil could make out every line of anger and disgust. In that split second, Virgil met Janus’ eyes and saw a face of utter disappointment. 

As quick as the vision came, it vanished. 

Instead of returning to darkness, Virgil found himself in a bright hallway. Colorful paintings dotted the walls. To his left, Vigil could make out a blue, indigo, and a red door. In front of him, was a door painted dark purple. 

Virgil blinked, but the image stayed. 

His door. The Light Side. It didn’t make sense. 

“Oh, Heya kiddo!” 

Virgil’s head snapped to the side to see Patton walking towards him. Had Virgil lost his mind? This had to be a dream. 

“Did ya forget something? I’m an excellent finder, seeing how I have… four eyes.” Patton tapped his glasses, then laughed for an unwarranted amount of time. Definitely not a dream. 

“Anx- Virgil, what happened to your arm?” Patton asked, his face suddenly showing concern. 

Virgil looked towards his arm to see a handprint emblazoned in red. He prodded it and felt the burning sensation anew. 

“Are you okay? What happened?” 

Virgil was done with questions. People kept asking him questions when he had NO CLUE what was happening. 

“He- He wouldn’t do this. He wouldn’t do this to me,” Virgil choked out. His voice shook, but no tears fell. He was spent, completely dried out. 

“Who wouldn’t, kiddo?” “I- I can’t- I’m supposed to-” “Shh, shh. It’s okay. We’re just gonna lie down in the living room for a minute, okay?” 

Virgil allowed himself to be led away from the vibrant hallway, to another vibrant hallway. The colors blurred into a kaleidoscope of useless visual information. He was sat on something soft. 

Warm arms wrapped around his torso. It felt wrong. Janus’ hugs were always cold. Awkwardly, Virgil was pat stiffly on the shoulder. Wrong. Remus was slimy or unsanitary, but never stiff. A third voice echoed in the room heroically declaring vengeance. Wrong. Wrong wrong wrong. 

Virgil forced his eyes shut, placed himself back in the darkness he was supposed to inhabit. But burned on the inside of his eyelids in blazing white was that look in Janus’ eyes. That fear and disappointment. 

He didn’t belong in the Light, but he could no longer go back to the dark. He’d reached too high, and, like Icarus, Virgil burned. 

[boneyspades]

i remember telling my best friend about the plot of sanders sides and how C!Thomas has different versions of himself that make up his personality but only he can see them and my best friend's just like "oh so he's got schizophrenia" lmao but I was like "nah they just imaginary"

but honestly now I'm just thinking what IF he did have schizophrenia? what if in the series finale Thomas just does a complete fucking plot twist on us where like- hold on I'm doing this in a fic format I just gotta- (I'm not good at writing so it might be a lil shit )

_

TW: MENTIONS OF OD (OVERDOSING)/MEDICATION (idk if that needs a TW but just to be sure)

Thomas let out a small sigh as he stared up at the stars, holding his new lover, Niko's, hand. everything just made a little more sense now. there was peace, for the first time in what seemed to be a decade. a decade of never ending dilemmas, a decade of fighting with himself constantly over things that may just seemed like small issues to everyone else, a decade of finding new things about himself, the good and the bad, at least that's what it felt like. Thomas and the sides, who watched from a distance, watched Niko as he let go of Thomas's hand and stood up to stretch before his eyes landed on his lover.

"It's getting a bit late.. we should head to bed" Niko spoke softly, a warm tone escaping his mouth.

Thomas sat up, letting out a stretch himself before nodding in agreement. they both grabbed at each others hands once again before heading back inside into Thomas's apartment, Thomas shutting the door behind them.

"You go up ahead, I just need to go to the bathroom for a sec.." Thomas rubbed his thumb against Niko's fingers softly as he spoke. Niko laughed in response, "Ok, don't take too long, like usual."

Thomas could only laugh with Niko softly as he watched him head upstairs. he lingered the feeling for a moment, staring at the stairs where he saw Niko leave to. it felt nice feeling loved like this after so long. he snapped out of his semi trance before heading to the bathroom, a small smile etched on his face.

he didn't even get to touch the door before he heard a different, but familiar voice.

"Thomas?..."

Thomas turned around to see Patton, Roman, Logan, Virgil and even Janus and Remus all standing there looking at Thomas, Patton standing in front of everyone else with Logan having his hand on his shoulder in a comforting way. as Thomas looked at the others, his smile began to slowly fade as he noticed the expressions on each of their faces.. they were washed over with melancholy but with a hint of determination in their eyes. it was out of character for alot of them, especially Remus. Why wasn't he spewing out horrifying ideas as Thomas? why wasn't Roman celebrating the new love they had received?

Before Thomas could even ask any of the questions he was thinking about, Patton gently grabbed a hold of Thomas's hand, turning it palm side up before placing something in his hand and pushing Thomas's fingers to close his hand around the object. Thomas looked down and opened up his hand to see the a small prescription container filled with medication that he'd refused to take for so long. his stomach weighed heavy.

"It's time to let us go."

Patton's soft voice ringed heavy around everyone. Thomas's head snapped up to look at Patton. he could feel his heart pound heavier and heavier as the realisation sank in of what Patton meant.

"n-no.. n-no I can't! I can't do that I-"

"Thomas, we've done all we could've done. there's nothing for us here anymore."

Logan added to Patton's words, "He's correct, Thomas. We all have completed our functions and it is safe to say that you don't require us anymore. it's finally that time."

Thomas's eyes darted to Logan. he couldn't believe it. the fact that Logan was agreeing to something as crazy as this. no one was even arguing about it. were they really right about this? Thomas tried to choke back on his tears.

"Will I ever see you all again?"

"Sure ya will, kiddo! when the times right.."

Roman took a few steps closer to Thomas, placing a hand on Thomas's shoulder in a means of comfort.

"Don't worry about us, Thomas. As I've always said, The adventure never ends, and besides, it's not easy to get rid of THE prince Roman... and the others I guess"

Thomas couldn't help but laugh softly and appreciate Roman trying to lighten up the mood. He could tell Roman didn't want to disappear. he wasn't sure if he'd ever come back, he just told that to not only Thomas but also himself to make himself feel better. Thomas looked over at Janus and Virgil who'd only gave a small singular nod, telling Thomas to take the medication. Thomas's eyes landed onto Patton again, soon bringing him in for a long embrace. Patton returned the hug as Roman and Remus joined in. Logan, virgil and Janus only placed a hand on Thomas's back for comfort since they weren't really one for physical contact.

once they all let go of eachother, all the sides could see the singular tear rolling down Thomas's cheek before he'd turned his back towards them to grab a pill from the container. "Don't overdose~" chimed in Remus, his voice breaking. Thomas could only scoff and whisper a "shut up" before he placed a pill in his mouth, grabbing a near by glass of water that had been sitting there from before and taking a big sip. he swallowed. Thomas could feel the unpleasant sensation of the pill sliding down his throat, like his body refused it, like it knew it would take the sides away from him. he looked down in the glass for a moment before realising he forgot to say something.

"Guys i-"

once he turned around. there was no one there. No Patton, no Logan, no Roman, no Virgil, no Janus, No Remus. no one. he was alone. the tears only got more intense as the realisation settled in. they were gone for good. Thomas hiccuped as his crying got more intense.

"Thank you."

_

and then it'd cut to black. end of the series. pardon my shitty writing but like if it were to end like this I'd just end up dying honestly

[ascenari0]

you know what my fav sanders sides fics are? The ones where like it’s deceit raising Remus and Virgil or like Patton raising Logan and Roman LIKE FOUND FAMILY.

I remember one where Virgil was adopted and soon felt.. like accepted in the family after a while and I almost died (affectionately).

If anyone has fic recommendations or you made one like this LMK PLSSS!!!

Or if you have an au literally tell me everything.

[prince-rowan-of-the-forest]

Never Did I Truely Hate You

----

Janus doesn't expect any of the others to want him around after he's accepted. Even Remus has been acting off. So, of course, the most sensible course of action would be to avoid the source of hurt entirely.

Virgil does not agree.

----

| Ao3 |

----

Warnings: Self isolation, pretty negative self image

Pairings: Anxceit, very background intrulogical.

Word Count: 2071

Notes: Did a poll on here for which fic I should post next and this one won in a tie with another fic that I will post on Wednesday :3

I feel like I don't write very much canonverse anymore so lmk what you think!!!

----

Janus hadn’t expected everything to be perfect now that he - and begrudgingly Remus - had moved up to the light side’s commons. 

He did not expect Roman to forgive him, or become any less hostile towards him at all, after everything he had done to him. He didn’t expect Patton to want much to do with him, and he expected Logan to prefer talking to anyone but him - even Remus, who he’d spent a surprisingly long amount of time with recently, but whatever, that was none of his business.

And even more than that, He didn’t expect a single ounce of kindness from Virgil. 

Not after he’d left, not after the quips and insults and snipes whenever they’d been within hissing distance of one another. No, he didn’t even expect Virgil to want to be in the same room as him, let alone talk to him, or heaven forbid sit down at the same table as him.

So, Janus decided to intrude on their space as little as possible. It was better to avoid the emotional turmoil and annoying pain it would cause than go through it all… right? …Right??

And so that was how Janus found himself becoming almost nocturnal for the first few weeks of this new arrangement. He also just so happened to spend an ungodly amount of time in the private greenhouse Remus had made for him as an extension of his room (fit, of course, with deadly tropical plants and poisons). He sat there for hours reading, or spent time caring for the snakes that also shared the space and he didn’t come out when someone knocked.

Which was rare because, of course, no-one wanted to talk to him. 

He spent time in the commons at night, making food, eating said food, sometimes even watching a film during the dead hours of the morning. It was fine, he was fine with this arrangement, and he was sure everyone else was enjoying business as usual - you know, without him there.

So far, Janus had managed to avoid running into any side at night - aside from one time, when he came across Roman, though he was already passed out at the kitchen island, so it hardly counted. Something he should have remembered - and would kick himself for forgetting after the events that were about to unfurl because of it - was how awful Virgil’s own sleep schedule was. 

He realised this fact very abruptly when, one night at just past three in the morning, Janus went to open the fridge, only to be attacked from above and tackled to the ground by some kind of hissing creature. 

Moments later, when he gathered his thoughts just enough to will the lights in the living space to turn on, he realised that said hissing creature was actually their resident spider himself, who was now sitting firmly on Janus’ chest as he pinned him to the ground with strong hands on his shoulders. What the fuck?

“Virgil?” Janus asked after a long stretch of silence in which they both stared at each other. 

“I finally got you,” Virgil huffed, seeming a little out of breath from the violent attack, “I’ve been - trying for the last week but you’re too fucking - slippery.”

“What??” Janus asked, staring at Virgil in disbelief, “why?”

“Because you’ve been avoiding all of us since you came up here, idiot,” Virgil said, pushing a little more weight onto Janus’ shoulders, it was starting to hurt, just a little, but he wasn’t about to tell Virgil to get off - this was the closest he’d gotten to him since… before, and Janus wouldn’t lie - at least not in his own thoughts - about how big of a crush he’d always had on Virgil. So yes, he was confused as hell, but he was absolutely not going to push Virgil away when he willingly touched him for the first time in years. What could he say, he was selfish.

“And?” Janus said, trying to make sure his face didn’t betray his raging feelings the position they were in were causing, “So what? I totally expect you and the others would actually want me around.”

“...So what? Dude I’ve been worried sick! Patton asks if we’ve seen you literally every day at breakfast- what? Even Remus doesn’t know where you’ve been!” Virgil yelled, “And then- I was down here on the sofa one night and - well I guess you didn’t fucking see me or whatever but you came down and then disappeared again - so I’ve been trying to catch you every night since to work out what the fuck is going on.”

“There’s nothing ‘going on’,” Janus protested, he was pretty sure he’d lost his hat when Virgil had knocked him over, he didn’t feel too comfortable without it, “I’m just giving you all space to recover after the last episode.”

“No you’re not,” Virgil said, shaking his head with a frown, “I know you too well for that, and we don’t need space, what’s going on, Janus.”

“I-” Janus trailed off, realising that Virgil had really trapped him in a corner here - both literally and metaphorically, Virgil knew him too well, even now, he could spot his lies easily, “It’s nothing of your concern.”

“I didn’t tell the others,” Virgil said, Janus blinked, staring at Virgil’s face in confusion.

“...Didn’t tell the others… what?”

“That you were coming down here at night, that I was trying to uh - do whatever you call this,” Virgil huffed, lifting one hand from his shoulder to gesture to the position the two of them were in, “I didn’t tell them.”

“Why not?” Janus asked, frowning.

Virgil groaned and rolled his eyes, “Because I know you too fucking well, now tell me why you’ve suddenly turned into an owl instead of a snake.”

“I’m saving you all the trouble of pushing me away,” Janus snapped after a long enough pause that Janus knew Virgil wouldn’t relent, “I already know that you all totally want me here, even if Patton’s stupid gesture to accept me meant anything.”

Virgil was silent for a second, didn’t break eye contact as he hesitated, before moving his hands from Janus’ shoulders. For a moment Janus expected him to stand up, dust himself off and mention something about how he was right before walking off. Instead, Virgil sighed and flopped down so he was lying fully on Janus’ chest, head tucked under his chin. 

Almost completely on autopilot - since his brain was entirely bluescreening at the action - Janus’ arms came up to wrap around Virgil, who let out a surprised hum at the action.

“...Virgil?” Janus asked, voice wary. Everything he could have possibly expected from this interaction had just been flung out of the window with a single action.

“When Patton accepted you,” Virgil said, voice a little muffled to Janus’ ears, “I- I was angry at first, but then I just thought that like- now that they liked you I could - I could go back to liking you too, I was excited, I think, to have you back - but then you just disappeared and I - started overthinking it as usual.”

Janus couldn’t help but chuckle even if it came out a little sad, “I thought you out of everyone would want to see me the most, you definitely made that very clear in all of our recent interactions.”

“I’m sorry,” Virgil said, readily and without hesitation, “I was awful to you, and it was - it’s no excuse but I only did it because everyone else chose to hate you too I - I was scared I’d lose their respect over it, but - it doesn’t matter now? Because Patton accepted you so - so they’re not going to hate me for liking you, right?”

Virgil lifted his head to look at him, and Janus sighed. 

“You already know that I don’t know the answer to that,” Janus said, “and I’m sure the others will totally just like me without question now that Patton has accepted me.”

Virgil chuckled, “Roman is still mad about the moustache comment.”

“I don’t doubt it,” Janus said, shaking his head, “And I certainly don't expect that Logan isn’t still angry with me about the courtroom.”

“Okay so maybe we- we don’t tell the others about uh - this,” Virgil said, resting his head back on Janus’ chest. 

“I totally know what’s happening right now,” Janus said with a sigh.

“I’m lying on you.” Virgil said, matter of factly, “B’cause you’re cold and strong and nice to lie on.”

“Okay, well this floor is definitely soft and warm and comfortable,” Janus pointed out, “So if you want to continue to lie on me may I suggest we move somewhere that wont give me back problems?”

“Oh right, yeah of course, sorry if I hurt you, when I uh - tackled you, by the way,” Virgil said, almost immediately getting up, looking a little sheepish. 

“It’s fine. Would you like to watch The Black Cauldron?” Janus asked as he sat up, changing the topic, “I think there’s a DVD of it around here somewhere, we could lie on the couch…?”

“You… remember that I like that film?” Virgil asked, sounding oddly quiet, Janus turned from where he had begun walking over to the couch, scrunching up his nose in confusion.

“Of course I don’t,” Janus said, “It’s not like you made us watch it every other week - interchanged with The Nightmare Before Christmas - without fail since Thomas first watched it or anything.”

He couldn’t help but delight in the way that Virgil’s face flushed red, despite him hurrying to join Janus by the couch. 

“I had almost forgotten about that,” Virgil admitted, “I’ve barely watched it since being over here.”

“I haven’t watched it since you left,” Janus sighed, “I highly doubt I remember the plot.”

Virgil smiled tentatively, “I’ll probably fall asleep before it finishes… but… that just means we’ll have to watch it again at some point, right?”

“Of course, let's take this opportunity to watch it now, shall we?” Janus said, summoning the DVD case in one hand whilst offering the other to Virgil. There was a long second of hesitation during which Janus could almost feel his world crumbling around him as Virgil didn’t take his hand, for a second he thought this must have been a trick, to have a relationship he wished for so badly dangled in his face and then snatched away again at the last second.

But no, that couldn’t be right, Virgil might be sarcastic, mean at times, but he wasn’t cruel and he certainly wasn’t dishonest enough to pull such a stunt so sincerely. Which meant…

“Are you alright?” Janus asked gently, taking back his hand. 

“Oh yeah, Yeah i’m okay,” Virgil lied, Janus raised an eyebrow, “Okay fine, no I- when I left I just- sorta maybe convinced myself that you guys hated me and I just- I didn’t expect you to be so… I definitely didn’t expect you to remember my favourite film, or- or want to cuddle while we watched it.”

“It’s not like I expected you to be any kinder towards me,” Janus replied, face going soft, “But… maybe it’s safe to say neither of us actually hate each other?”

Virgil snorted, “Yeah uh- maybe not, I’m sorry.”

“I forgive you,” Janus answered, “And I’m sorry too, honestly.”

There was a second where Virgil just took a deep breath and let it out slowly, “Thank you, I forgive you too.”

“Good,” Janus smiled, putting the DVD into the player before sitting down on the couch, patting the seat next to him in invitation, “Because we’ve missed a lot of weekends - so we’d better make up for all the lost viewing time, hm?”

“I think we’d get bored if we watched it that much,” Virgil couldn’t help but laugh, flopping down on the couch next to him and immediately leaning into his side, and God had Janus missed this. 

“Perhaps,” Janus nodded. 

“Maybe if you actually came to the movie nights we tried to invite you to we’d have more things to watch,” Virgil murmured as Janus pressed play. 

“You tried to invite me to movie nights?” Janus asked, tilting his head. 

“Yeah - we all took turns knocking on your door every time we did one, you never answered.”

“...oh.”

“Now shut up, the film’s starting.”

Neither of them made it halfway through the film before falling asleep in each other’s arms.

-----

Tags: @full-of-roman-angst-trash @your-local-random-dino @cutebisexualmess @glacierruler @roseianxiety @bella-bugatti-frogetti-baguetti @scalesfeathersnfur @oatmeal-stans-the-trash-rat @littlerat2 @goldnskyart (if anyone wants to be added, let me know!)

[lefaystrent]

Distractions

Fandom: Sanders Sides

Pairings: all-star cast of platonicness

Summary: The light sides are in a sad state of affairs. The dark sides are pretty good at offering distractions.

-------------------------------------------------------

Logan sits on the living room couch, head in his hands, slumped in defeat. Despair. Failure.

He's slightly jostled by someone else sitting on the couch.

"Aliens aren't real," comes Virgil's voice, definitive and assumedly directed at Logan.

Logan lifts his head enough to check. His glasses have made a mighty impression into his forehead but he doesn't move to adjust them. Virgil is very nearly glaring at him.

"Virgil, you yourself have created power point demonstrations centered around the validity of aliens. Since when has your opinion changed?"

"Since now. Fight me, nerd."

Logan leans back a little to properly look at Virgil. He could be mistaken for fuming, the way his jaw is set and the fire burning in his eyes. But no, he is merely adamant to rile Logan up. To what end though?

"Are you...challenging me to a debate?"

Virgil gives a sharp-toothed, satisfied grin. He is willing to play devil's advocate for a good cause.

***

"Hey, wanna dance?"

Roman windmills his arm in the direction of the sultry voice that whispered in his ear. The faint smell of garlic wifts in his nostrils, followed by a gleeful chuckle.

"Remus!! Get out of my room!"

Remus rolls back on his heels. He folds his arms behind his back and looks into the air, a thoughtful hum on his lips.

"Hmmm, how about no?"

"Leave! Out you pest!"

"Make me!"

"You would force the hand of your own brother?" Roman says far too seriously, and Remus gives him an unimpressed stare. "...yeah, you're right, this is very on brand for you. I don't know why I'm acting surprised."

Remus shrugs and throws his hands up in the air. "Alright, if you're done bothering me–"

"You're the one who came in my room!"

"I've got better things to do than listen to you whine, Prince Poopy Pants."

Remus goes to stride out the door. Roman watches him, arms crosses and fingers tapping impatiently on his elbow, haughty expression that says he's one push away from snapping.

Remus pauses at the door.

Roman doesn't have time to anticipate.

Remus snatches up one of Roman's Pop figures off his bookshelf and flees the scene. Roman exits stage right in pursuit, screaming.

***

"You can't stay in bed all day."

"Watch me," Patton says, a pout in his voice. He's buried under blankets with only his hair sticking out at the top.

Janus clicks his tongue and scratches at Patton's scalp. It's less effective with gloves on, but Patton allows the contact.

"Or do, I certainly won't judge you," Janus says flippantly.

Patton whines into the mattress, "That implies that someone is judging me."

"I didn't say that. Did I say that?"

"Janus!" Exasperrated, Patton tosses down his blankets enough to reveal his rumpled onsie and impressive bedhead. He stops when he sees what sits on the bedside table that wasn't there before.

"You never came down for breakfast this morning," Janus explains. "Not that I care or anything. There were just so many pancakes leftover that it would be a shame for them to go to waste."

Patton eyes the tray and the stack of syrupy pancakes. His lip wobbles a little. "You brought me breakfast in bed?"

"Don't get used to it."

Patton finds the will to smile and tucks into breakfast. It tastes freshly made and sweet.

[sleepyvirgilprompts]

Virgil stirred slightly, said a sentence that contained no intelligible words but sounded grumpy, and curled closer to Janus. Janus frowned. "Sleep," he ordered-- unnecessarily; Virgil had already gone back to sleep.

[the-aerispace]

HEAR ME OUT!!!!!!!!

Dungeon meshi Sanders sides fic.... what if what if what if....

"I-is this cannibalism??" Watching Janus, a half-naga eat a basilisk.

"So," Remus starts. "Which one of your parents fucked a snake?"

Janus blinks, and sighs. This will be a long fucking journey.

There's also the idea to make Janus the mad mage?? Or make the Dragon Witch the mad mage? Making creativitwins the descendants of the golden kindgom?? Possibilities are ENDLESS

[libiemoon]

Alright I’m bored as hell, so have some of my favorite SaSi fics.

This fic has to be one of my favorites! It’s what lead me to headcanon Janus as a mother figure for Virgil.

I absolutely love how protective Virgil is and I am obsessed with the whole tattoo artist!remus au.

Remus and Virgil dying their hair at 3am is one of my favorite prompts (def not because I’ve also dyed my hair at 3am way to many times)

No words could describe how much I love this fic!!! Like holy hell it’s written so well!! It is my all time favorite dukexiety fic, just the idea of them getting married on halloween is so perfect! Also the others reactions are amazing XD

[mysisypheannightmare]

A Necessary Proposal

Word Count: 3487

Warnings: Unreliable narrator, negative thinking, typical angst

--

His fully thought-out proposal hadn't been quite as easily accepted as he'd planned, but he really shouldn't have been surprised by such outcomes at this point. At least he managed to complete the presentation before the questions flooded in this time.

Logan stood in front of the other sides, all gathered in the commons, neutral expression staunchly in place while the others all looked back at him with a wide variety of expressions, ones Logan had little hope to properly interpret.

"Logan, you can't be serious," Virgil sounded exasperated. Logan was unsure if this was from disbelief or irritation, but he'd guess it was the latter.

"I assure you, I am," he told him plainly.

Patton seemed to stumble over his words, trying and retrying to say something but he didn't seem to even know what he wanted to say. There seemed to be a squeak or a sob in there, probably. Logan wasn't sure how to interpret that at all.

Roman, defiant as always, crossed his arms and remarked,

"And you expect us to just carry on without you? I hate to admit it, but I'm pretty sure we do actually need you around."

Logan glanced his way, having already prepared for the creative side’s exaggerations.

"You are all clearly capable of handling your roles and tasks without my assistance," he replied. And it was true, he’d witnessed it on many occasions.

Roman's brow furrowed at his answer and Logan attempted in vain to understand what that could mean. Thinking? Maybe considering Logan's point?

Roman didn’t stay quiet long, however, and eventually just sighed dramatically, stating,

"I mean, roles? Sure. I can get Thomas to land any role he wants, yeah? Get him to work his little tush off memorizing every line and playing that part the way it was meant to be played!"

He posed his arms in a way that Logan assumed would be uncomfortable, but Roman only continued,

"But if you don't remind him to set his alarm or tell him the directions to get to the theatre for the audition, then all my work is for nothing!"

Logan rolled his eyes.

"Any one of you could give reminders. And Thomas has a functional GPS on his phone for directions," he explained. "There's very little reason for my participation."

Patton seemed to finally find his words, tripping forward for a moment and exclaiming,

"But...but we've been over this before! We're all important to Thomas!"

Logan nodded.

"Indeed, you are all very important."

Patton frowned. Logan could easily guess what that meant – disappointment.

"Logan..." Patton whined, but he didn't argue further.

Logan could see the matching looks of discontent on the others' faces. He’d thought his proposal would properly lay out everything they’d need to know about his decision in this matter, but clearly he’d been wrong. Perhaps he just needed to explain in a bit more detail…

"It's not as though I intend to leave him without logical functionality," he reassured them. "But to make adequate room for all necessary parties, it may be best that I stay out of the way. You all have a lot to contribute, and you deserve to be heard."

"So do you!" Virgil rebutted, gesturing directly at him.

Logan glanced down at Virgil’s outstretched hands. He'd genuinely thought this proposal would go over much more smoothly with the other sides, but it seemed he underestimated this group's innate desire to argue trivial points.

He tried again.

"...this is to best benefit Thomas, as well as all of you."

Virgil only appeared angered at this addition.

"I don't get how you being gone is meant to be a good thing for anyone, Logan."

"I will not be gone," he corrected him. "In fact, I'll make sure my door is always unlocked and I am always available for any questions should the need arise."

Patton put a hand to his head, as though in pain. Was he in pain? That was an unforeseen outcome from all of this.

"...I just. I don't understand,” was all that Patton said.

Logan nodded,

"I know, and that's alright."

"Is this what you want, Logan?"

Logan looked over. Finally, Janus had spoken up, after standing there silently and merely observing the lot of them this whole time. Logan had guessed that Janus would wait to give any input, as he so often does, so this must have been that moment.

Logan answered genuinely.

"Yes."

Janus tilted his head to the side a bit, eyeing him oddly.

"Are you sure about that? You seem hesitant in your answer."

"Yes," Logan reiterated. "As I said earlier, this is to benefit Thomas."

"But does it benefit you?"

Logan tried not to change his expression at such a question. This definitely wasn't the direction the presentation was meant to go.

He tried answering as briefly as possible.

"Well, it doesn't...have...to." Not his best work, but close enough. "With my absence, I can create more comfortability for all of you to--"

"How does that benefit you?" Janus cut him off.

At least Logan was used to that happening by now. But it still wasn't a question he'd anticipated.

He tried to come up with something acceptable to say, but there wasn’t an adequate answer to give, so he simply didn't respond.

Patton glanced over at Janus, another unreadable expression on his face.

"...Janus?" he questioned, as though he'd get an answer.

Janus kept his gaze focused directly on Logan, carrying on.

"You said you'd answer our questions, so I'm asking. How does this plan of yours benefit you?"

His words sounded casual and curious, but Logan knew he was only disguising them that way. He may not have known what Janus was truly getting at, but at least he could see it was a lie.

Unfortunately, that knowledge didn't help him answer the question. He’d have to come up with something.

"There is benefit..." he tried. "It's just... difficult to explain."

Janus kept his eyes on him.

"Try."

Logan swallowed. He really should have known he'd get these kinds of questions from his proposal, but he'd genuinely believed the others would be more accepting of the decision, especially once he explained the benefits for Thomas. He'd even laid out how all their usual tasks would still be accomplished, if not improved. Surely they would understand, right?

Logan straightened his back even more. He just needed to answer these questions for the sake of understanding his reasoning, right? He could do that. They deserved to understand, and it was his job to help in that exact regard, after all.

He finally responded,

"There's... It is easier to conduct my work from afar," he explained in earnest. "The necessary work for Thomas, that is. I can administer instructions without direct involvement with him or any of you."

Janus didn't even blink, his eyes boring into him as he spoke.

"Why?" Janus asked, his voice sounding somehow more fierce, more determined.

Logan was thrown off a bit by his tone, unsure what that could mean.

"...why?" he repeated.

"Why is that easier?" Janus clarified, again his tone sounded...angry? Distressed? Logan really couldn't be sure. He was never sure.

But at least this was a simple question to answer.

"Thomas takes it into consideration quicker if I'm not the one who--"

"Why is it easier for you, Logan?" Janus cut in again.

Logan resisted the urge to roll his eyes at the irrelevant question.

"I just said, Thomas takes it into consideration."

Janus clapped his hands together, the gloves muffling the sound, the tips of his fingers touching his lips as he inhaled sharply.

Logan had already started to give up on interpreting these odd expressions and behaviors.

Janus sighed and went right back to his questioning.

"So, it's only easier because Thomas listens that way? Why does he only listen if you're not around?"

Logan blinked.

"I...don't know."

In fact, he hadn't even really considered WHY that was the case. He just knew that it was.

Janus crossed his arms, looking more annoyed now. Logan knew that particular expression well enough by now, as all the different sides shared it, especially when speaking with him.

"Have you asked him?" Janus raised an eyebrow.

Logan finally glanced away from the constant gaze that was on him. He hoped he didn't look as uncomfortable as he felt.

"No," he told him. "I doubt Thomas knows why, either."

"So the only reason you want to do this is because it lets Thomas listen to you?"

"No," Logan replied instantly, trying not to sound defensive. This wasn't even ABOUT him, and especially not about Thomas refusing to listen to him! Why would that be their first assumption??

Janus waited, likely to see if Logan would elaborate but he didn't. He shouldn’t need to, either.

"Then what's the other reason?" he asked.

Well. Shit. Logan tried to school his expression to stay neutral, but he knew he'd floundered at his own slip-up just then.

He couldn't help but glance around at the others, who all seemed to be looking between him and Janus in mostly confusion. Probably. That was another expression he was relatively familiar with, after all.

Janus clicked his tongue, dragging Logan's attention back to him.

"You just said that wasn't the only reason," he remarked. "So, what else is there?”

Well, he certainly couldn't respond to that. There were several reasons, sure, but none of that mattered in getting them to understand his decision. Yet, now the other sides were all looking at him expectedly, all because of these incessant questions.

"Logan?" Virgil spoke up. Yet another question with no answer.

Maybe that was what Janus was trying to do…

Logan turned back to Janus, hoping he didn't portray any anger in his realization.

"You are trying to make this about me, Janus, but this isn't about me." He responded coldly. "Yes, it would be better if Thomas listened, for his own survival and betterment, but we are all well aware that such concepts rank low among his priorities.

And that is alright! He has big aspirations and a lot of emotional turmoil to attend to, so it's understandable that the rest is pushed aside."

He crossed his arms, looking pointedly at both Janus and Remus.

"However, he is at a current juncture where he needs to give more time and energy towards self-preservation and expanding his imagination, and so, I am giving him the room he needs to do that by removing that which he already finds... extraneous."

Remus grimaced at him from over Janus' shoulder.

"So it's our fault then?"

"I did not say that," Logan replied. "You are all very important and necessary to Thomas. I am not. So, I am doing what I can to make up for it."

Janus' eyes narrowed at him, some sort of clear emotion was definitely there if Logan could be bothered to try and figure it out.

"And that doesn't bother you?" Janus took a step forward, "That you're the only one getting shoved aside in all this?"

Logan kept his gaze steady, not intimidated in the slightest.

"This is a plan of my own design, Janus. I don't see why I'd have any qualms with its execution."

And he didn’t – have any qualms, that is. If it were for Thomas’ benefit, if it made his life better, he’d do whatever it took. He wasn’t about to argue against his own decision, after all.

“And the only reasons are because Thomas listens more when you're not around and because you think you need to make room for Remus and I to contribute whatever we have to say?” Janus continued.

Finally, they were starting to understand.

“Yes,” he told him.

Janus laughed, insincere as ever.

“Now, why don't I believe that?”

Logan frowned.

“I wouldn’t know, but I can assure you, this will be to great benefit for all of you and Thomas.”

He didn’t understand how they couldn’t see why this was a good idea. The pros far outweighed the minimal cons, they would not be hindered by his absence, it all was meant to help all of them. Why couldn’t they just see that?

Janus was still staring at him, with an odd look in his eye. It was very unlikely he’d know what that could be.

“May I ask how you came to that conclusion?”

Logan crossed his arms, getting tired of this constant go-around.

“You have a lot of questions today, Janus.”

The other side only smiled.

“Do you have an answer?”

Of course he had an answer, he just didn’t want to give it. But, if they all needed more information before they could truly understand his decision, then so be it. He could indulge…but only a little bit.

“...I've been...conducting research for quite some time,” he started. “Tested some hypotheses, found the conclusion with the best results. That is all.”

“May I ask what these hypotheses were?”

Janus continued to smile. It was irritating to see, but Logan quashed the feeling down. None of that was necessary here. He simply needed to answer these inquiries and be done with it.

“...I would think it obvious, but sure,” he responded. “I was theorizing my purpose among all of us as sides and if Thomas responded better to my participation or ...others impersonating me...or my absence with simple influence instead.”

“And you found this to be the best option?” Janus asked.

“Yes.”

Obviously.

“Well, then I guess I have no further questions,” Janus concluded, that smile still present.

Logan took a breath. Thank goodness that was over.

Janus turned around, as though he was going to walk away, if that somehow meant he could walk through Remus, who was still standing behind him. Odd, but Logan wasn’t going to interpret that, either.

But then he turned back,

“Oh wait, I do have one more!”

Logan grumbled,

“What?”

Janus turned back around, stepping towards Logan again.

“Well, you see, your mention of experiments got me wondering...” he said, and then pointed back over his shoulder, “I've seen Remus over here get all kinds of riled up doing little experiments of his own, so I have to ask...

How did it feel doing that research, Logan? What feelings came about once you got to that conclusion?”

Logan didn’t bother to stop himself from rolling his eyes. Janus was back to the inane questions, it seemed.

“...I don't feel, so there were none,” he replied.

Janus looked surprised.

“Really?” he responded incredulously. “You found out that Thomas is better off without you, and you were just fine with that?”

Logan’s eye twitched involuntarily. The irritation was back.

“Yes.”

Janus stepped forward again, leaning more to the side while still eyeing Logan in that weird way.

“I mean, I think I'd be devastated,” he told him. “I took a lot of measures myself to get Thomas to finally listen to me, but you were perfectly fine just rolling over and letting him treat you like that?”

Logan wasn’t even sure how to interpret this line of questioning. All this meeting had meant to be was a simple proposal, maybe a quick Q&A session, and then he’d return to his room, never to exit again. This was supposed to be uncomplicated, easy. But Janus was making it into an interrogation of sorts, and he had no idea why.

“...yes,” he finally replied. It didn’t matter what this was meant to be at this point. Janus had managed to take control of the conversation. There was little else he could do but answer the questions until they finally stopped being asked.

Janus, now on a roll, just kept going.

“It really didn't bother you in the slightest? You're not upset that you serve no purpose here? That you did all that work for nothing? Thomas made you to be a part of this group but he doesn't actually want you here?” he stepped forward again, this time far too close for comfort. “That doesn't make you angry, not even a little bit?”

Well, this was just getting ridiculous. If the only reason Janus was asking him all these questions was to get a rise out of him, he should have just shot down his initial line of irrelevant questions earlier. So much for camaraderie.

“Your leading questions won't accomplish anything, Janus,” he told him. “You already know I don't have feelings.”

And that these questions won’t get the result he apparently was fishing to find.

Janus leaned back,

“Are you sure? You seem rather frustrated right now.”

Logan sighed quietly. This was absurd.

“I can assure you, I'm not.”

Janus turned on his heel and walked away again. Logan took a second to glance at the other sides, only to see they all looked both concerned and uncomfortable. Well, they certainly weren’t the only ones…

“And you've never been frustrated before? Not even once?” Janus continued.

Logan ignored the burning sensation in the back of his throat.

“I have not felt emotions,” he told him frankly.

Janus looked back over his shoulder at him.

“Then how would you know?”

Logan furrowed his brow, confused.

“...what?”

Janus crossed his arms, his expression having changed again in a way Logan couldn’t hope to recognize.

“Well,” he said, “if you've never felt emotions then how would know if you're frustrated or not?”

Logan paused. While an intriguing but albeit pointless question, this was really neither the time nor place for such a discussion. To end this quickly, he gave a concise and simple answer instead.

“...it's not as though one needs to experience something to know the truth behind it. Thomas doesn't need to place his hand on a burning stove to determine it would be hot, for example.”

“Would he know what heartache feels like if he hasn't lived it, though?” Janus immediately asked in response.

Logan sighed.

“...how is that comparable?”

“Would he know what satisfaction is without experiencing a positive outcome after working so hard to finally achieve it?” Janus continued. “Or betrayal if he's never had someone go out of their way to work against him?”

Clearly this discussion was happening anyway, despite his efforts. While he’d realized Janus took control of the conversation earlier as a means to distract him and make this about something else entirely, he only just now remember that he hadn’t yet bothered to reign it back in.

He’d just have to try his best to get this to finally end.

“I fail to see the point you're trying to make with this line of questioning,” he told Janus, getting right to the matter.

Janus smiled that perturbing smile again and Logan tried not grimace in return.

“How do you know if you're frustrated or not, Logan? If you don't have feelings, how do you know?”

The second Logan opened his mouth, it became much harder to ignore the burning sensation that kept creeping its way up his throat.

He swallowed around it as best he could.

“I... I just, I don't. I…” he wasn’t really sure what he could say. He certainly couldn’t say what he wanted to, either.

“You don't know?” Janus supplied.

Logan took a deep breath and looked away from Janus’ obnoxious grin.

“Unfortunately, there are quite a few things I do not know,” he explained. “But I intend to still offer as much assistance as I possibly can, for all of you. If...if you need it, that is.”

Janus didn’t stop, though.

“...and if we don't?” he asked.

“Janus!” Patton whisper-shouted.

Logan hesitated and ultimately chose not to look at the other sides, hoping it’d make things easier.

“...well, then, that's understandable,” he responded. “I'm well aware by now that I am unneeded.”

When the next few seconds were left empty, no more questions instantly being asked, he couldn’t help but give his own.

“Are we done with the questions now?”

This only seemed to upset Patton, though, and he whined,

“Logan—"

“Are we done with the questions now?” Logan repeated sharply, careful not to raise his voice in his desperation.

Patton backed down, glancing around at the others, who all remained quiet, even Janus.

“...I guess?” he finally replied.

Logan nodded, grateful. He didn’t feel relief, though, as he never felt anything, of course, except that hot burning at the back of his throat that refused to go away.

“Good. I'll be in my room.”

He didn’t wait for anyone to change their mind and come with even more unnecessary questions he didn’t want to answer.

The last thing he heard as he sank out back to his room was someone shouting at Janus for answers instead, ones he knew the other side likely didn't have.

At least all the questions were finally over, meaning he could start what he had just proposed - to keep out of everyone's way.

And, if he was lucky, it'd be permanent.